Yeh Meri Family (2018–…): Season 1, Episode 2 - Vish Amrit - full transcript

FLAME OF RETALIATION

It's not Dad's fault.

All this isn't important to him.

It's Mummy who should
have paid attention.

Mummies shouldn't get too romantic
in August, September, and October.

If the kid is born in April, May or June,

he won't be able to celebrate his
birthday in school.

It's the bitter truth.

Birthdays are the only days when
every student feels like going to school.

As your homework is duly finished.

Everybody pays you attention



as shunning the torturous uniform

you appear a rainy season peacock.

The entire class sings in chorus for you

and then teacher lovingly...

strokes your head.

They even kiss you till class VI.

And then, you, like an Emperor,
bestow toffees to the whole class.

One for the losers

and two for the favorites.

Actually four.

For the difficult task
of distributing toffees,

you are assigned your favorite sidekick.

And when the entire school
is braving boring periods,

you and your sidekick roam around



in empty corridors like bosses.

Everybody showers you with affection,

be it the teachers...

the principal,

and even...

the stuck-up P.T. teachers.

Then, there is a party in the evening,

where all your friends
bring exciting gifts.

But in my life, this day never comes.

Because I was born on the Eighth of May.

The school is shut.

And all the friends go out.

The same old colony crowd
will be there this time, too.

It'll be such a sad scene.

Your concepts are warped.

It's your birthday, right?

Get rid of your shorts and wear pants.

We'll go wherever you feel like.

We'll eat whatever you want.

And watch a film in a movie-hall.

The one we want. We'll have fun, man!

But it won't be so easy, man.

We'll have to walk a tightrope.

For the tickets, right?

For permission.

Yeah, man.

Mummy won't ever give
permission right away.

She can't stand to see me this happy.

Why are moms like this, man?

They'll celebrate your birthday.

But won't let you celebrate.

If Mom doesn't pull me down,

I'd freely fly
high like a kite in the sky.

But Mom,

keeps pulling me down like the string.

Stealing isn't wrong,

getting caught is.

So...

rule number one...

A golden chicken...

Rule number two...

Dad can't even tell
if a hundred is missing.

But Mom,

can even sniff a twenty.

Even you used to steal,

and used to get caught too.

Lord!

Rule number three...

Stolen money is...

Harshu?

Yes, Dad?

You're over here?

I thought you came to our room right now.

What are you doing so late in the night?

You're solving sums?

Are you mad?

Go to sleep.

Dad, I tell you.

Hey.

They're teaching you Trigonometry
in sixth grade itself? Cool!

Dad

I'm in the eight grade.

Dad is not father

He's farther.

So...

What was I saying?

Yes.

Rule number three...

Never keep stolen money in pockets.

Mummy will get her hands on it

and then get her hands on you.

Now, all I need to do
is take permission from Dad.

And officially take 100-200 Rupees.

But for that I will have
to get hold of Dad alone.

How much does he eat!

Eat faster.

Dad?

Dad? I needed some money.

OK. For what?

My birthday's around the corner.

Oh, yes.

-How old are you now?
-Thirteen!

Oh, wow, a teenager!

Grow a bit mentally, too.

Yes.

I'll go to Pritam's with my friends.

You're planning to go outside?

Did you ask Mom?

Yes, long back.

Did you ask Mom?

Yes.

She even said it's better
and cheaper, too.

Only hundred rupees.

Are you mad? What would a hundred get you?

Take it when you need it.

But listen, what's most important is

going safely and returning safely.
All right?

Dad's words kept echoing in my ears.

"What would a hundred get you?"

And here I am,

stealing money for the past
three weeks for no reason.

Wow, son!

For three weeks?

You didn't prepare as much
even for the annual frog race.

Well done, my son!

So, how much do we have?

We already have around 500.

Once Dad gives more,
must be around thousand!

This is awesome, man.

No, listen...

When Dad gives you 500,

return 100.

Tell him, "Dad, I don't need as much."

He obviously won't take it back.

But our responsible behavior
will also be evident.

Man, you're so intelligent.

One forty five.

What scale?

Let it be.

What I was saying is,

if we have so much money,

let's also call Viju.

He's our own kid.

We'll have fun tripling on Bullet
and we'll even save on rickshaw money.

Yes. Awesome! Call him.

So I'll ask him to talk to you.

No, Shanky. You talk to him.

Don't even give him my number.

If Mom answers the phone, she'll boot me.

And I'll be the only one
calling from today.

We'll talk one on one.

OK? You don't call.

I said I won't do anything.

Phone, letter, telegram, postcard,
I won't do anything! Happy?

Just cause you've stolen
five hundred bucks,

you think you can teach me?

Sorry, man.

OK, listen.

We'll watch the movie in Maan Prakash.

Why not in Raj Mandir?

It's on the outskirts of the city.

All deserted, we'll be safe.

But is Maan Prakash
also playing Mrityudata?

Why would we watch Mrityudata?

It's Raja Hindustani
that's playing at Maan Prakash.

We'll watch that.

But there's Bachchan in Mrityudata!

Amitabh Bachchan always
makes senseless films.

I have buildings, property
and bank balance and cars.

What do you have?

I have my mother.

No house, no car, no bank balance,

and to top of that he has a mother.

Freakin' loser.

Yeah.

You're right.

Write it down.

Amitabh Bachchan
won't last over a year or two.

Let's go for Raja Hindustani.

There's a smooch scene
of Karishma Kapoor in the film.

A smooch?

The longest ever.

We'll get the front seats.

It'll be more fun.

Yes.

Karishma Kapoor is awesome, man.

She's just a bit older.

I wish she had a younger sister.

Harshu?

I'm coming, Mom!

Seems like Mom's heard everything.

Are you mad?

She hasn't heard a word.

You'll get your tickets
by the end of the day.

Bye.

Mommy?

You called?

What happened here?

This? I was watering the plants.

Poor helpless creatures,
withering away in the heat.

Oh, my child. Stop acting.

Go bring chickpeas from the market.

You're making chickpea tonight?

I haven't savoured your chickpea dish
in such a long time!

I made them day before yesterday!

Anyway, they aren't for today.
I'm soaking them for tomorrow.

It's my naughty's birthday tomorrow.
I will make chaat.

I'll make you work on my birthday?

I'm going out to Pritam's with my friends
tomorrow. I'll eat over there.

I've talked it all out with Dad.

Really?

And Dad gave you permission?

Yes, long back.

I should water some more.

Dabbu?

Go get chickpeas.

You gave Harshu the permission to go out?

What permission?

His birthday party.

To celebrate it
with his friends at Pritam's.

Yes!

So what's the big deal?

Right.

Let him go to Pritam's today.

Tomorrow he'll go watch
a movie with his friends.

Not that he studies anyways.

And gradually he'll pick up
more bad habits.

This is the age kids take the wrong road.

Did you take out some change?

Harshu, wake up.

You'll keep sleeping
even on your birthday?

Mom.

You're looking for me over there.

While I'm waiting for you over here.

Mom?

Take out my clothes.

I'm going to bathe.

Wow, my Bachchan.

You're going for a bath so early,
birthday boy?

Happy birthday, my hero.

Go.

NAGRAJ

Taking a bath on your birthday
is a different feeling.

Birthday.

The day you get to wear
'outside' clothes at home.

CHACHA CHAUDHARI
AND PROFESSOR SHUTTLECOCK

Mom?

Mom, I'm hungry.

Happy birthday, Brother!

Mom? What are these decorations for?

Because it's my Harshu's birthday.

But I'm going to Pritam's.

I'm going to make better food
than Pritam's.

With cashews, almonds, cheese, and butter.

But I've already told my friends.

So, call them home.

No.

Dad had said yes.

He never told me anything.

I'll just make you talk to him.

Let's decorate the birthday boy!

Let's decorate the birthday boy!

Let's decorate the birthday boy!

Let's decorate the birthday boy!

Dhwani!

Dad's not answering, man!

I'm going to his office.

Where will you go alone?

It's not safe outside.

You were sending me alone
to get chickpeas yesterday.

Harshu!

Don't act stubborn on your birthday.

Which other day then?

I don't want to have the same old food-
aloo tikki, dahi vade, chhole puri.

If you're so keen
then why don't you put a stall outside?

Harshu!

Ill-mannered boy!

Your tantrums won't work here!

Go to your Pritam's!

You'll only get it when you start working!

You've become too brave!

There are other kids
and there's you I've got!

You want to go out, right?

Go out!

My birthday has to be celebrated
for their enjoyment not mine!

She'll call all the fat ladies
of the neighbourhood,

to get compliment her cooking skills!

Sensex dropped, sir.

We just began to invest
and this happened.

Sir, my wife beat me up
and said I'm jinxed.

We lose where ever we invest.

-Calm down, your money isn't less.
-But, hasn't the share market fallen?

-Mutual funds are invested in that only.
-Absolutely not!

All the money from mutual funds
are not invested only in the share market.

Didn't you want to buy that car, Mr. Mina?

-A Gypsy.
-Yes, exactly.

Since your goal was short-term, your money
was put into a safer scheme. Look!

Only 20% was invested in the share market.

-Oh...
-Yeah!

What about ours?

You wanted to make a down payment for
a house which is a long-term goal. so...

65% was invested.

Your retirement is quite far away
so your entire money was invested.

Look, don't think about today.

These small variations keep happening.

You think about the future.

OK, tell me. How many years
have you been married for?

Three years.

No...

Four years.

No, three years. It's three years.

You mean it's been three-four years
you've been married, right?

Tell me, do you love you wife more now
or did you love her more before?

Tell me!

-I don't want to tell it in front of him.
-Go ahead, tell him...

All right, forget it.
You guys fight, right?

It happens, but in the long run,
love grows.

You won't remember these small hits.

You'll remember the love.

This is exactly the same.

You keep teaching us something so lovingly
and there's always a call to interrupt.

Devender Gupta, Invest & Co.

Why did you tell Harshu he can go out?
He's fighting with me!

-OK, I'll talk to him in the evening.
-You come right now.

-Come right now!
-How can I come now?

People here are worried
about the share market crashing.

It's just your share market
that's crashed, right?

There's chilli all over
the potatoes here!

You better come over and talk to your son!

Stop with that!

Go and call him.

Harshu?

Come, let's go inside.

No.

Don't fill air in your mouth,
let's fill it in the balloons.

What do you keep filling baloons for?

Do I look like a three-year old?

Oh, wow! Look at those balloons! It's red.

What a lovely cake!

Candles also look so nice!

Blow the candles!

Make a wish!

Why do they make us wish when
they don't want to fulfill it?

They'll make me stand
in the middle of their stupid friends,

play a Bappi Lahiri song

and then they wouldn't say, "Go dance",

they'll say, "Show us your dance".

I don't want to show uncles
and aunties my dance!

I want to party with my own friends!

Even I find the dance a bit weird.

Whatever, man!

Come inside.

We've to get everything ready
before the guests come.

Yes, we have to show the whole world
what a great family we are.

If one of the members is a problem,
doesn't mean the whole family is mad.

But the one with the problem
should undertsand.

So, do understand.

Mom has called everyone,
so you will have to celebrate.

Stop being so dramatic.

There's still time.

Call your friends.

And come inside.

Come on!

First, get the cordless. Go!

Hello, Shanky?

The plan is canceled.

And the film?

Yes, everything is canceled.

Mom?

Yeah, man.

Sorry, I'm canceling at the last minute.

It's not your fault, man.

Moms always create a blockade
at the very last minute.

No worries.

We'll watch it on the VCR.

I'm going inside.

But I won't celebrate my birthday.

You're extremely stubborn.

It's heredity.

Hereditary.

Shanky is right.

For instance, look at Lord Krishna.

Despite the fact that he killed
demon like Putana and Snake Kaliya

or the fact that he saved
the entire village

by lifting a mountain on his finger.

Still his mom will still thrash him!

Just for eating extra butter.

That's it?

Moms are like remote controls.

They keep changing channels.

If you're studying, they say eat.

When you're eating, they say sleep.
If you're sleeping, they say wake up.

And when you're awake, they say go study!

They won't let us do a thing peacefully.

And they want us to become world-class!

Newton,

Hitler,

Mowgli.

Why were they all so successful?

None of them had moms.

Your turn.

What's the hurry to be tall?

Kiddo, once you are taller than your mom,

the beatings stop.

You should be grateful,

you only had Yashoda to hit you.

Lord Ram had three moms.

Poor guy.

Today is not the day to be upset.

Come on. Eat something.

I'm not hungry.

How are you not hungry?

You haven't had anything since morning.

Give kids food they like,
and make a fool out of them.

Control.

Don't spoil mood like this, Harshu.

You want to have Pritam's pani-puri,
right?

So we'll order that!

Call all your friends.

Dabbu, order it.

Happy?

Here, it tastes really good.

Control.

Eat it now.

What kind of water do you want?

Sweet or spicy?

You want to go out
with your friends, right?

Don't go today.

Go tomorrow.

All right?

I am Doga for the day and nobody cares.

Who will care tomorrow
when I will be a mere Supandi

See, it's the last year

that Devansh is here.
Who knows where will he be in the future.

Then how will you ever celebrate
your birthday with him?

Come on, have it.

Keep sitting here.

Don't celebrate your birthday!

I went through so much labor pains
to see days like these!

You must have already
heard the upcoming audio.

Once you become parents...

Then we'll see.

Wake up early morning
and slog like a slave for them...

And in return this is what I get to hear.

What would have been better is if a man...

Never had kids.

Leave it, man.

Tell me...

what do I have to do?

Drama queen.

It's hereditary.

Go and get changed.

Now hurry up and get on with work.

Give me the diary, I'll call his friends.

Here, kids.

OK... Here you go.

Please, have some.

I've made these at home.

Hello! Good evening!

How are you?

You're right on time.

Hello, son. How tall he's become!

Go on. Harshu's over there.

Please, come.

Good evening.

Good evening.

Good evening.

The chaat tastes so good.

Not at all, it just took me ten minutes!

-Good evening.
-Good evening.

You here?

Sorry, I actually didn't
know it was your birthday.

Aunty had called, so...

Actually, I had told Mom to call everyone.

I didn't get any call.

Actually, my mom wouldn't have
send me alone, so...

She does the right thing.

It's not safe actually.

And because of the hurry,
I wasn't able to get you a gift so here...

You, too. Hi.

Thanks, man.

This is my first birthday so...

Have some?

Why do you invest in Sensex?

-Better invest in NIFTY.
-What?

Where were you?

I actually got late at work.

Make a wish.

Come on.

Come on, son.

Show us your dance!

Vidya, go dance.

Shall I begin talks with Mrs. Rangnath?

You've been watching too many films.

Darpan danced really well.

-Some of his steps were really funny.
-Very funny.

And please say thanks
to Aunty for inviting me.

This was the first birthday party
of the year.

Why?

Actually, it gets late at night.
So my mom doesn't let me go.

But Aunty said that Uncle would drop me.

That's why I was allowed.

Come on, kids.

Yes, Uncle.

Shanky's right!

As I told you before,

all your concepts are messed up.

It seems as if the string
is pulling down the kite.

But that's not what it is.

It's the string that provides support.

Without it, the kite
would flutter for a bit

but after that straight down.

No way!

Mom would never let the kite fall down.

Mom!

What is this?