Wings (1990–1997): Season 4, Episode 21 - Another Wedding - full transcript

( upbeat piano theme playing )

All right. You're
doing great.

Now, see here, we're
flying at 5000 feet.

We're at level trim.
Now start taking her in.

Okay? Now, you're absolutely
sure you want to do this?

Oh, yes.
It's always been

a dream of mine
to fly a plane.

I'm-- I'm just a little nervous.

It's all right. It's all right.
I will be right here.

Okay. Ready?
Here we go.

Okay. She's all yours.



Okay.

All right, now ease up
on the yoke,

start taking her down.

This is great.

I'm really doing it.
( chuckles )

Oh! What was that?

It's okay.
It's all right.

It's a little
turbulence.

Okay, now...here.

S-- Ease up
on the throttle.

Just keep it level.

( buzzing )

Oh. I-I-- I'm okay.
I'm okay. Heh.

( buzzing stops )



LOWELL:
Uh, Joe?

How much longer
do I have to do this?

Just a little
while longer, Lowell.

It's Fay's
birthday.

Right.

( imitating engine
humming )

( upbeat theme playing )

( airplane flies overhead )

( door opens )

Hey. Good morning, guys.

Please, Helen.
Shh.

HELEN:
Oh, that's right.

Last night was Walter's
bachelor party.

Tsk. Oh, are you
guys hung over?

( all yell )

Helen, uh, five coffees,
please.
( exhales )

Oh, and you might
want to see

if these guys
want some.

So did this bachelor party
follow the usual routine?

You drink till your eyes spin,

drool over the obligatory
stripper,

then go home and throw up?

Not necessarily
in that order.

Uh, here's
your tool belt, Lowell.

A girl named Evangeline
dropped it off this morning.

Evangeline?

She's my sister.

You don't have
a sister.

Oh, right. Right.

Uh, she's my sister's friend.

Lowell?

Oh, all right.

She was the stripper
at Walter's bachelor party.

Must you shame it out of me?

Well, what was she doing
with your tool belt?

Nothing you'd ever see
on This Old House.

HELEN:
Good morning, Walter.

Thanks for throwing me
that party last night, guys.

All I can say is...

thanks.

Walter.

( claps once )

W-Walter.

You had as much to drink
as I did last night.

How is it you have
energy to burn,

and I feel like I've slept
with a herd of goats?

That is a just
a feeling, right?

I'm an air traffic
controller, guys.

I have to be at the top
of my form at all times,

so I can make
those split-second decisions.

What can I get you, Walter?
Just coffee.

Okay.
Or do I want orange juice?

You know what?
I'll have tea.

Do I want tea?

Yeah.

Tea.

You getting a little nervous
about the wedding tomorrow?

No. I'm looking
forward to it.

My brother's flying in
from Philadelphia.

Ramona's family's
on a plane from Boston.

And my parents are due in
from New York any minute.

As a matter of fact,
they're all set to land

at about the same--

Whoa. Hold the tea.

( plane flies low overhead )

It's weird. I'm not that close
to Walter, but for some reason,

I'm really looking forward
to his wedding. Why is that?

Well, maybe it's because
when we see two people

about to start
a new life together,

it renews our own feelings
of hope and promise.

Or because there's
nothing else to do

on this stinking
island prison

we call Nantucket.

Well, every time
I go to a wedding,

I always pray that
this great-looking guy

is gonna ask me to dance.

It never happens.

So this time...

I'm bringing
some insurance.

Henry Applegate.

Henry from down
at Air Freight?

Yep.
Heh. Okay.

BRIAN:
Yeah, Helen.

Better watch yourself
during the fast dances,

'cause if those pencils fly out
of his pocket protector,

someone might get hurt.

I don't care. He's the best
dancer on the island.

What about you guys?
Are you bringing dates?

Hey, guys.

HELEN:
Hey, Alex.

Give me a second,
I'll let you know.

Hey, Alex.

Uh, have you thought
about

going to
the wedding with me?

No.

No, you haven't
thought about it?

Or, no, you're
not going with me?

Yes.

Yes, you have
thought about it?

Or, yes, you're definitely
not going with me?

Let me be perfectly clear.
Under no circumstance

will I be going with you
to Walter's wedding.

No way, nohow.
Got it?

Listen, I'll check back
with you later on, but, um,

I'm gonna need a definite
decision on this.

Lowell, do you think Bunny
will come back for the wedding?

Oh, I don't
know, Fay.

I haven't talked to her
in quite a while.

Who's Bunny?
Oh, it's my ex-wife.

I don't know, you know,
I guess she might show up.

I mean, she knew
Walter.

Then again,
she knows

damn near every able-bodied
man on the island.

But I kind of hope
she shows.

Were you thinking of
trying to get back together?

Uh, who knows,
Helen?

You know, a lot of time
has passed.

Maybe she's changed.

Maybe I've changed.

( laughing )

Maybe she's changed.

( upbeat theme playing )

( chatter )

Roy.

Roy, you signed
the guest book so big,

there's no room
for anyone else to sign.

Makes 'em think
you're important.

Then when they don't find
a gift from you later,

they just figure yours is
the one without the card.

Then...you--

You just assume

that there will always
be one without a card?

No.

( sighs )

Oh, God,
there's Bunny.

Where?

J-- She's over
by the wall...

in the pastel-floral-chiffon,
tea-length cocktail dress.

I only caught
a glimpse.

Lowell, you came here
hoping to see Bunny.

Go over and talk to her.

She's over there
sitting by herself.

I don't know
what to say.

Oh, you two were married
for six years.

I didn't know what
to say then either.

Oh. Oh. All right, Lowell, uh,
see if this will help.

Uh, just for a second,
pretend that I'm Bunny.

Now, whatever you want
to say to her, say it to me.

Okay.

Um, Bunny?

Uh, I miss you
and I love you.

And I was hoping that
there was some chance

that we could
get back together.
Mm.

And if not,
is there any chance

that we could
get back together

for about an hour?

Godspeed, Lowell.

Table 3.
Table thr--

Oh, God.

Who are you?
Who are you?

I'm Roy Biggins.

I'm Roy Biggins.

No. I'm Roy Biggins.

No, I'm--
Stop that.

Stop that.
Oh.

Oh.

Hello, everybody.

Hey, Antonio.
Oh, Antonio,

you look so handsome
in your new suit.

Oh, well, I figured
it was about time.

I'd had my last suit
since my confirmation.

Oh. Isn't that
when you're 13?

Well, uh, yes. Scarpacci men
reach full height at that age.

From then on,
all growth is just...

hair.

Well, it looks
very nice.

Oh, thank you. I--
It cost, uh...

quite a bit.

But, uh, the salesman said...

it was me.

Oh, here's Henry. Hey.
Hi, Helen. Hello, Fay.

Hey, Antonio.

Nice suit.

Thanks.

I got it on sale.

Porca miseria.

Hm.

Mah.
Wow.

Seen these women in here?
Oh, Lord.

I love it when they hold
weddings at hotels.

One-stop shopping.

You got a room?

No, I rented a key.

Oh, my God.

Al Weimper.
He's here.

Weimper?
Oh, it's just this guy

from down at
the Whale Lodge.

I went to a meeting
a few months back.

I thought it would be
good for business.

Turns out it's just
this bunch of dull, boring guys

that sit around all day
telling dull, boring stories.

Hm. Bet they waived
the initiation fee

to get you in, huh?

( sarcastic scoff )

Excuse me.
Joe.

Joe Hackett.
Good to see you.

( chuckles )
Al. How did you get over here?

We, uh--
We've looked for you

at our
Whale meetings, Joe.

You've been missing out

on a lot of excellent
fellowship.

Yeah, well, Al, I--
Say. You know how we have

our various levels
of achievement?

You know, Blue Whale,
Gray Whale?

Well, last night
Charlie Fletcher and I

made Humpback.

Ha-ha-ha-ha!

Well, I, uh,

sure wish I could have
been there to see that.

( upbeat theme playing )

( band playing slow jazz music )

Oh, may I have the first dance?

First, last,
and all of 'em in between.

That's the plan, Stan.

Oh, wait a minute. Uh,
this jacket's kind of binding.

I-- Be right back.

Hi, there.

Hi.

Hi.
Hi. Do you want to dance?

Um, well, actually,
I would love to dance.

( clears throat ):
All right.
Let's get busy.

I'll be back.

Lowell?

Ha. Bunny.

Oh, what a small world.

How have you been?

I've missed you.

Really?

Have you, uh...

missed me?

Missed you?

Oh, no. Not--
Not really.

I don't think that...

missing you is--
Is, uh...

Okay, maybe
a little.

Bunny, are-- Are you
flirting with me?

What makes you say that?

Because I've seen you
do it before.

Not with me, of course.

( song ends, people applaud )

Object of the game:

find the pea.

Fun for you. Heh-heh.

And more fun for me.

There.

( gasps )

Oh.

See how easy it is?

Let's play again.
Okay.

( chuckles ):
Okay.

But this time,
let's make it

a little more interesting, huh?

Heh.
( camera clicking )

See this?

Now, all you have to do
is go to Mommy's purse

and bring back as many of
these as you can find.

Brian.

Brian.

That woman.

By the potatoes.

Yeah?

She is a vision.

She has the sad,
dark eyes

that bespeak
generations

of trouble
and heartache.

God, she's hot.

So go ahead
and talk to her.

Nah.
Go ahead.

I-I never know
what to say to a woman.

Antonio, Antonio.
Do what I do.

Hang on her every word
and never,

ever treat her
like a sex object.

Unless, of course,
your object is sex.

Hope that helped.

So, uh...

are you here
with anyone?

( laughs )

Are you here
with anyone?

Well, of course
I am, silly.

His name is Phil.

( chuckles )

Phil, you say?

So...where is Phil?

You know, I'd really
like to meet Phil.

Oh, thanks, Phil.

This is my ex-husband,
Lowell.

Oh. Nice
meeting you.

Sorry, I didn't
catch the name.

Hi. Name is Joe.

I was wondering
if maybe--

There you are, Joe.
I thought I'd lost you.

Uh, I'm-- I'm sorry, Al, I--
No need to apologize.

Say, did I tell you about
the Whales' pancake breakfast?

It's all you can eat, heh,
and, boy, can we eat.

Yeah, you know, I guess
you wouldn't be Whales

without a little blubber.

Blubber. Ha-ha-ha!
Come here, you.

( laughs )

Really? Really?

So do you just
market the bedpans

or do you
design them yourself?

Did I mention that
Phil drives a Porsche?

Really?

So who are you here with?

Oh, I'm here with, uh...
Yvette.

And she drives
a...Vette.

I can't wait
to meet her.

I can't wait to
find her.

Antonio, she'll never know

you want her to
have your children

if you don't go over
and introduce yourself.

Okay. I'll try.

How do I look?

Perfect.

Uh, except for that
spot of gravy.

Dah. My new suit.

I-it's just
a little spot.

Here. Uh,
the club soda will take--

Take care of it
in a moment.

It'll come right out.

Hm. It's
not working.

It's not working, Fay.

Uh... Oh, my.

I-I probably
shouldn't have used

a napkin with
butter on it.

( band playing lounge music )

( song ends, applause )

Henry, don't you
ever get tired?

Oh, hey. When
the music starts,

my body
has to move.

But, uh,
if you want...

I guess we could
sit one out.

Oh, that'd be nice.

Listen, I'm sorry that we
haven't had a chance to dance.

Unless it's a merengue.
I've been real busy--

I didn't catch your name.
My name is Helen--

Fay...I cannot go over
to her like this.

Why don't you just take
the jacket off?

Because I don't have
shoulder pads in my shirt.

Guess I have
no choice.

Antonio, did you get
a new pen recently?

Yes, why?

Agh.

"Jiffy Cleaners.

We're on the spot."

Well...all right.

I'll--
I'll see The Crying Game.

But...why is it
so important to you?

( band playing slow
lounge music )

Ah, Fay, it's no use.

I'm just too nervous
to go over to her.

Oh, A-Antonio,
either do it or not.

I can't hold your hand
anymore.

For goodness sakes,
I'm not your mother.

You're right.

Oh, oh, wait
just a second.

There.

Hello.

I don't mean to be forward...

uh, but...would you
consider...

dancing
just one dance

with...

me?

Come here, funny face.

So you having
a good time?

I'm working on it.
How about yourself?

( scoffs ):
You kidding me?

Al Weimper hasn't shut
his blowhole all night.

Hey, Brian, I gotta
tell you something.

The weirdest thing
happened to me.
What?

I was going through
the receiving line.
Mm-hm?

I lean over to kiss
the bride's mother.

She slips me
the tongue.

You too?
Wha--?

You're kidding?
She got both of us?

Listen, listen, listen.
I'm shaking her hand, right?

And I lean in for
a polite little kiss.

There it is: the hors d'oeuvre
I never ordered.

Boo.
Boom!

Right in there.
Yeah, same thing.

The bride's mother?

You guys too?

( laughing )

What? She's
a handsome woman.

( band playing upbeat
lounge music )

Oh. To tell you
the truth, I'm bushed.

Would you mind if we
just called it a night?

( weakly ):
That'd be fine.

Great. I'll
get our coats.

Oh, God.

Oh, Fay. Quick,
give me a pencil.

Well, I know I don't
have one in my purse,

but sometimes I forget

and I leave one of
those little pencils

from the bowling alley

in my hair.

Uh, uh, uh, dear? Don't you
want to check your makeup?

Oh, Fay, not now.

Excuse me?
Mm-hm?

I'm sorry.

We didn't have a chance
to dance tonight.

But, um...

my name is Helen
Chapel,

and if you're still
interested...

here's my number.

Gee, thanks.

I, uh--
I really gotta get going.

Goodbye.

Well, I think I made
an impression.

Oh, I'm sure you did.

( sobbing ):
I hate weddings.

Hi, guys.
Hey.

Hey, Walter. How does
it feel to be married?

Great. And I'm sure
I did the right thing too.

Watching Brian here move
from woman to woman all night

made me realize

I'm not cut out for
the single life.

Heck, when I'm playing
with my grandchildren,

you'll still be out
there on the prowl.

You are...the king.

Make sure you try some
of that wedding cake.

It's real fudgy.

You okay?

Hey, I'm
the king, right?

( scoffs )

Hey, look, man,
if you, uh--

If you want
to talk...

AL:
Ahoy. Joe.

I gotta go.

Phil and I have to
leave now.

It was good to
see you again, Lowell.

Uh, you too, Bunny.

Too bad I never got to
meet Yvette.

( chuckles )

Now, listen.
About that.

I-- I, really-- I can't
put this off any longer.

Sorry I took
so long, honey.

Honey?

Aren't you going to
introduce me?

Uh, yeah. Bunny,
this is--

Yvette.

( chuckles ):
Ooh-hoo. I get it.

Yeah.

Yeah. This is Yvette.

Oh, uh, I-- I didn't
realize--

Lowell's been trying to
pull me over all night.

I guess I was
a little nervous

about meeting
his ex-wife.

I like to think of him
as all mine.

Well, it was, uh...

nice to finally meet you.

Guess I'll just be,
uh, going now.

Bye, Lowell.

Bye, Bunny.

Uh. How did you--?

I bumped into Fay
on my way in.

Thanks, Alex.

Have you seen
Brian?

Uh, yeah. Actually,
he just left.

Oh.

Hm, chair?

So I thought...
you weren't coming tonight.

I wasn't going to, but I got
tired of sitting at home

feeling sorry for myself.

See, this guy
I used to live with--

a guy who said he couldn't
make a commitment

--is getting married today
down in Florida.

I just didn't want to be
reminded of that.

Wow. Say, I thought I was
having a bad night.

( Lorenz Hart's "Isn't It
Romantic?" playing on keyboard )

You know...

thought I was
gonna have a chance

to dance with Bunny again.

Will I do?

You know, I--

I've never danced
with anyone but Bunny.

You're doing fine.

Isn't it romantic?

Oh, I really
love this song.

I just wish I could remember
the name of it.

( upbeat theme playing )