Wings (1990–1997): Season 2, Episode 9 - Friends or Lovers? - full transcript

HERE ARE YOUR TICKETS

WITH YOUR SEAT ASSIGNMENTS,
MR. MORTENSON.

AND WE AT AEROMASS,
WE APPRECIATE YOUR PATRONAGE.

WE HOPE
YOU'LL FLY WITH US AGAIN

REAL, REAL, SOON.
OH, LOWELL.

PLEASE TAKE
MR. MORTENSON'S BAG
OUT TO THE PLANE.

MY PLEASURE.

RIGHT THIS WAY, MA'AM.

[gasping]

[Roy clearing throat]

[seagulls cawing]



SO, WHAT WAS WRONG WITH
THE RADIO AGAIN, JOE?

IT KEEPS CUTTIN'
IN AND OUT.

WHEN I'M IN MY OFFICE,
I HAVE GOTTA BE ABLE

TO PICK UP THE MIKE
AND KNOW

WHOEVER IS SITTING
IN THAT COCKPIT CAN HEAR ME.

WELL, I'D SAY
YOUR BEST BET WOULD BE

TO STICK YOUR HEAD OUT
THE OFFICE DOOR AND YELL.

NO, I--I MEANT
WHEN THE PLANE'S
IN THE AIR, LOWELL.

SO DID I.

HEY, JOE, THE CANDIDATES
FOR THE BACKUP PILOTS

ARE STARTIN' TO JAM UP
OUT THERE.

OK, I'M READY.
SEND 'EM OUT.

LET'S GO.

IS THIS IT?



AFRAID SO.

YOU KNOW,
A 3-MAN COMMANDO SQUAD

COULD TAKE THIS PLACE OUT
LIKE THAT.

SECURITY AROUND HERE SUCKS.

UH, THANKS.
I'LL LOOK INTO IT.

UH, I WANT-- I WANT
TO THANK YOU ALL FOR COMING.

SEE,
I'M IN KIND OF A BIND HERE.

I, UH, RECENTLY
LOST MY LICENSE
DUE TO HYPERTENSION.

IT'S JUST A TEMPORARY THING.

ANYWAY, I--
HOW OLD ARE YOU?

OH, 18, SIR.

BUT I HAVE
MY COMMERCIAL PILOT'S LICENSE.

I GOT IT 2 WEEKS AGO.
SAME DAY MY BRACES CAME OFF.

PLANE'S A DEATH TRAP.

COUPLE OF ROUNDS
OF STEEL-JACKETED AMMO
IN THE FUEL TANK

AND THIS BABY'S
A ROMAN CANDLE.

COOL.

YEAH, WELL, UH, THANKS.

UMM, UH, NOW WHY DON'T--
WHY DON'T WE JUST GET ON
WITH THE INTERVIEWS.

WOULD YOU LIKE TO STEP
IN MY OFFICE, MISTER, UH...

STUBBS.

BY THE WAY,

DOES THIS JOB REQUIRE
THAT I FLY AT NIGHT?

YEAH,
IS THAT A PROBLEM?

WELL, MY DOCTOR DON'T LIKE ME
DRIVIN' AFTER DARK

BUT HE DIDN'T SAY NOTHIN'
ABOUT FLYIN'.

SO, MR. STUBBS, I IMAGINE

YOU'VE HAD QUITE A LOT
OF EXPERIENCE FLYING.

OH, I'VE FLOWN
FOR A LOT OF OUTFITS.

I EVEN HAVE A LETTER
OF RECOMMENDATION

FROM CHARLES LINDBERGH, HERE,

BUT THE DAMN THING
CAME APART.

CHARLES LINDBERGH?

THE CHARLES LINDBERGH?

WELL, UNLESS HE WAS
PULLIN' MY LEG.

MY DAUGHTER WANTS TO GET ME
OUT OF THE HOUSE.

I SEE.

YEAH,
SHE'S KIND OF MAD AT ME

BECAUSE I TOTALED HER NEW CAR.

HECK.
IT--IT--IT WASN'T MY FAULT.

IT'S ALL THOSE FANCY LIGHTS
AND GIZMOS ON THE DASHBOARD.

THEY'RE-- IT JUST
GOT ME FLUMMOXED.

(Lowell)
YOU LEFT THE SWITCH DOWN
ON YOUR TRANSMITTER, JOE.

I READ YOU LOUD AND CLEAR.

WHO--WHO--WHO SAID THAT?

I DIDN'T TOUCH
THE SWITCH, LOWELL.
THAT'S THE PROBLEM.

IT CUTS IN AND OUT
ALL BY ITSELF.

IT'S A GROUND-TO-AIR RADIO.

GOOD LORD, MISS AGNES!
WHAT THEY WON'T THINK OF NEXT.

[sighing]

OH, NO, HELEN, I DON'T WANT
THOSE EGGS FRIED.

I ASKED FOR 'EM SCRAMBLED.

NO PROBLEM.

HAPPY?

WHO TWISTED YOUR SHORTS?

IT'S MY LIFE, I GUESS.

I FEEL THIS DESPERATE NEED
FOR SOMETHING

AND I JUST DON'T KNOW
QUITE WHAT IT IS.

I MEAN,
I GET UP IN THE MORNING
AND I COME TO WORK.

I GO HOME, I GO TO BED.

IS THAT ALL THERE IS?

THROW IN A T.V. DINNER

AND, YEAH,
THAT'S PRETTY MUCH IT.

WHAT AM I GONNA DO, FAY?

MY LIFE IS A MISERABLE,
LONELY EXISTENCE.

GET A BIRD.

FAY, I DON'T THINK
YOU UNDERSTAND.

ALL MY FRIENDS
ARE GETTING MARRIED.

TOMORROW,
I'M GONNA BE THE BRIDESMAID
FOR THE 5TH TIME THIS YEAR.

I'M NOT EVEN ASKING
TO GET MARRIED.

ALL I WANT TO DO
IS GO OUT,

HAVE A NICE TIME
WITH A DECENT GUY.

IF SOMETHING
DOESN'T HAPPEN SOON,

ALL THE KIDS
ARE GONNA CALL ME

"THAT WEIRD OLD LADY
AT THE END OF THE BLOCK."

YOU GET USED TO IT.

LET ME PUT
MY THINKING CAP ON

AND I'LL BET I COME UP WITH
THE PERFECT FELLOW FOR YOU.

THANKS, FAY.

HEY, HELEN,
EVER HAD PEACH BRANDY
SUCKED OUT OF YOUR NAVEL?

HURRY, FAY, HURRY.

IT'S NO USE.

I CAN'T BRING MYSELF
TO HIRE ANY OF THOSE GUYS.

JOE, YOU'VE GOTTA.
I CAN'T KEEP FLYING
EVERY FLIGHT MYSELF.

MY LITTLE CATNAPS
ARE UPSETTING THE PASSENGERS.

I KNOW. I KNOW.
BUT LOOK AT MY CHOICES.

JOE, THOSE ARE
THE LAST 3 PEOPLE
ON EARTH

WHO ARE WILLING TO WORK
FOR WHAT YOU'RE PAYING.

WHY DON'T YOU LET ME
MAKE THE DECISION, OK?

I'LL ASSESS
ALL THEIR QUALIFICATIONS,

FACTOR IN THEIR EXPERIENCE,

AND AFTER I'VE COMPILED
ALL THE DATA,

CHOOSE THE BEST POSSIBLE
PERSON FOR THE JOB.

1 POTATO, 2 POTATO?

YEAH, PRETTY MUCH.

FAY, THIS AIRLINE
GETS HARDER TO RUN
BY THE MINUTE.

TRY STANDING IN HEELS ALL DAY.

I AM TOO WRAPPED UP
IN THIS JOB.

I--I GET HERE IN THE MORNING,
I RUN THE OFFICE ALL DAY,

I GO HOME AT NIGHT
AND GO TO BED.

I NEED SOMETHING ELSE
IN MY LIFE.

HELEN IS THINKING ABOUT
GETTING A BIRD.

(Brian)
JOE!

MEET YOUR NEW SWING PILOT.
KENNY McELVEY.

IT'S A PRIVILEGE
TO BE ABOARD, SIR.

KENNY?

[laughing]

HE'S YOUNG,
BUT IN MY OPINION,

THIS CADET HAS
ALL THE RIGHT STUFF.

OH, BOY.

WAIT TILL THE KIDS
IN THE BUS HEAR

I'M PILOTING THE 5:15
TO HYANNIS.

[sighing]

LET'S SEE WHO'S
THE DORK-FACE NOW.

[laughing]

[people exclaiming]

OK, EVERYBODY, LISTEN UP.

I JUST GOT BACK
FROM A WEDDING.

MY CHANGE OF CLOTHES
IS LOCKED IN THE CAR

ALONG WITH MY KEYS.

SO, IF ANYBODY HAS
ANY WISECRACKS TO MAKE,

LET ME HEAR 'EM NOW.

YOU WON'T HEAR ANY FROM ME.

I LIKE THE NEW UNIFORM.

[sighs]

DID YOU MEET
ANYONE INTERESTING
AT THE WEDDING?

(Helen)
OH, YEAH, FAY.

THE ONLY SINGLE GUY THERE

WAS PICKIN' HIS TEETH
WITH A MATCHBOOK.

SO?

THE TEETH WERE IN HIS HAND
AT THE TIME.

FAY, IT WAS NOT SUPPOSED
TO HAPPEN THIS WAY.

ALL THESE GIRLS
GETTING MARRIED,
THEY WERE THE EASY TYPE,

WHO SPENT HIGH SCHOOL
NECKING IN PARKED CARS
UP AT INDIAN POINT.

NOT ME.

I WAS DEDICATED TO MY MUSIC.

A NICE GIRL.

THE SORT OF GIRL THAT GUYS
ARE SUPPOSED TO MARRY

AFTER THEY GET TIRED
OF THE OTHER KIND.

SOME BOYS TAKE
A LONG TIME TO TIRE.

INDIAN POINT.

[laughs]

WELL, THE WIFE STILL LIKES
TO GO UP THERE AND PARK,

JUST TO PUT THE EXCITEMENT
BACK IN OUR MARRIAGE.

DOES IT WORK?

SO SHE SAYS.

NEXT TIME,
I'M GOING WITH HER.

OK, KENNY.

EVEN THOUGH
YOU'RE KIND OF YOUNG,

I HAVE TO ADMIT YOU SEEM--

LOSE THE HAT.

YOU SEEM TO KNOW
YOUR STUFF.

I WAS TOP MAN
IN MY FLIGHT CLASS, SIR.

AND I LIKE YOUR APPEARANCE.
TAKE NOTE, BRIAN.

BOUGHT MY OWN UNIFORM
WITH MY ALLOWANCE, SIR.

I WANT TO BE THE SAME
KIND OF SQUARED-AWAY,
BY-THE-BOOK PILOT YOU ARE.

KID, WE GOTTA TALK.

SANDPIPER AIR
FLIGHT 7 TO HYANNIS
WILL NOW BEGIN BOARDING.

YOUR COPILOT THIS AFTERNOON
IS NANTUCKET'S OWN,

KENNY McELVEY,

WHO HAS A B-PLUS AVERAGE

AND IS THE PRESIDENT
OF THE CHESS CLUB.

SO, HOW ARE YOU TODAY,
JOE?

WELL, I'M TRYING HARD
NOT TO LET THIS JOB
BE SO IMPORTANT TO ME.

LAST NIGHT,
I EVEN WENT OUT.

ENDED UP
AT THE ROSE AND CROWN.
I MET A WOMAN.

EVERYTHING WAS GOIN' GREAT

AND THEN I STARTED
TALKIN' ABOUT MY PLANE.

OH, JOE, YOU DIDN'T.

YEAH.

NEXT THING I KNEW,
SHE WENT TO POWDER HER NOSE
AND NEVER CAME BACK.

APPARENTLY,
SHE KICKED THE WINDOW
OUT OF THE LADIES' ROOM

AND RAN FOR IT.

WHERE AM I GONNA FIND
SOMEONE WHO'LL ACCEPT ME
THE WAY I AM?

WELL, YOU KNOW, JOE,
WHEN IT COMES TO FINDING
THE RIGHT PERSON,

SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BE
A LITTLE PATIENT.

I WAS TELLING HELEN
THE SAME THING.

WAIT A MINUTE.
HOW BLIND COULD I BE?

IT WAS RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME.

I FORGOT MY PURSE.

HELEN,

I'VE BEEN THINKING
ABOUT MY SITUATION AND, UH,

YOU KNOW,
YOUR SITUATION AND--

EXACTLY WHAT KIND
OF SITUATION

ARE WE TALKIN' ABOUT
HERE, JOE?

HE'S WASHED OUT
AND YOU'RE OVER THE HILL.

COMMUNICATION'S A DYING ART.

HELEN, COULD YOU
COME INTO MY OFFICE
FOR A MINUTE, PLEASE?

SURE.

LOWELL, WOULD YOU WATCH
THE COUNTER, PLEASE?

SURE, HELEN.

UH, WHAT IF SOMEBODY WANTS
TO ORDER SOMETHING?

JUST TELL 'EM
I'LL BE BACK IN A MINUTE.

OK.

[coughing]

LOWELL!

[choking]
WATER.

HELEN'LL BE BACK
IN A MINUTE, ROY.

OK, SO WHAT'S THIS
ALL ABOUT?

BEFORE YOU SAY ANYTHING,
JUST HEAR ME OUT.

UH, I COULDN'T HELP
BUT NOTICE,

YOU DON'T SEEM TO HAVE ANYONE
IN YOUR LIFE RIGHT NOW

AND NEITHER DO I.

AND I WAS THINKING
IT WOULD SEEM
ONLY LOGICAL THAT--

YOU WANNA GO OUT ON A DATE?

YES. NO. WELL, YES,

BUT I, SORT OF, WANTED
TO BE THE ONE TO ASK.

I KNOW IT'S OLD-FASHIONED,
BUT THAT'S JUST THE WAY
I FEEL.

THE GUY SHOULD ASK THE GIRL.

OK. GO AHEAD.

WANNA GO OUT ON A DATE?
NO.

WHAT? W-WAIT.

LOOK, I--I KNOW, I KNOW.

THIS IS THAT
NO-DATING-PILOTS RULE.

YOU KNOW,
I'VE GOT TO TELL YOU,

I HAVE ALWAYS THOUGHT
THAT RULE WAS
A LOT OF BALONEY.

WELL, IT'S KIND OF MOOT
BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT A PILOT
ANYMORE.

YEAH, BUT YOU'RE FORGETTING,
I'M NOT A PILOT ANYMORE.

WAIT A MINUTE.
DID YOU JUST--

WELL--WELL, THEN,
WHY WON'T YOU GO OUT WITH ME?

BECAUSE THIS SOUNDS
WAY TOO CONVENIENT.

I DON'T WANNA
GO OUT WITH YOU

BECAUSE YOU'RE LONELY
AND I'M LONELY

AND WE BOTH HAPPEN
TO BE AT THE SAME PLACE
AT THE SAME TIME.

I MEAN, WHAT IF SOME OTHER
LONELY WOMAN HAPPENED BY?

WOULD YOU
ASK HER OUT INSTEAD?

WHAT DOES SHE LOOK LIKE?

JOE!

I'M KIDDING, I'M KIDDING.
IT'S ME KIDDING.

LOOK, I JUST DON'T WANT THIS
TO BE CONVENIENT.

I AM NOT A MINIMART.

I WANT YOU TO ASK ME OUT

BECAUSE YOU FIND ME
ALLURING, DESIRABLE,

INTRIGUING, PROVOCATIVE.

I WANT TO KNOW
THAT LATE AT NIGHT

WHEN YOU LIE IN BED
DRIFTING IN THAT NETHERWORLD

BETWEEN CONSCIOUSNESS
AND SLEEP,

I DANCE THROUGH YOUR DREAMS.

I THINK THAT WAS IMPLIED.

NO. THAT WASN'T.

I WANNA HEAR YOU SAY IT.

A WOMAN HAS TO HEAR
THESE THINGS.

WELL, YOU KNOW,

WHAT YOU SAID.

NO. YOU HAVE TO SAY IT, JOE.
JUST SAY IT.

ALL RIGHT.

[air plane passing]

YOU'RE ALLURING,

AND DESIRABLE,

[laughs]
AND SOMETHING ELSE,

AND WHEN I'M ASLEEP,
YOU DANCE THROUGH
THE NETHERLANDS.

CLOSE ENOUGH. WHAT TIME
YOU PICKING ME UP?

8:00.
GREAT.

OH, WAIT A MINUTE.
WHAT ABOUT BRIAN?

WHAT ABOUT BRIAN?

WELL, HOW'S HE GONNA FEEL
ABOUT THIS?

WE'VE ALWAYS BEEN
THE 3 MUSKETEERS.

WHAT HAPPENS TO THE 3RD
WHEN THE OTHER TWO
START DATING?

I DON'T KNOW.
HE GETS A BIRD?

I'M SERIOUS, JOE.

HE'S ALWAYS ASKING ME OUT.
I ALWAYS REFUSE.

NOW YOU AND I
ARE GONNA GO OUT.
AND IT'S GONNA HURT--

W-WAIT. WHY DON'T--
WHY DON'T WE JUST SEE

IF THIS IS GOING
ANYWHERE FIRST

BEFORE WE UPSET
THE APPLECART.

WELL, MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT.

WE'LL JUST KEEP THIS
BETWEEN THE TWO OF US.

(Helen)
WHAT BRIAN DOESN'T KNOW,
WON'T HURT HIM.

(Joe)
RIGHT. THIS'LL JUST BE
OUR LITTLE SECRET.

I DON'T UNDERSTAND.
WHY DON'T THEY WANT
YOU TO KNOW?

NEVER MIND.
JUST TURN THAT THING DOWN.

ROGER.

SO, YOU WANNA
HANG OUT LATER?

I KNOW THIS COOL VIDEO ARCADE
IN HYANNIS.

SORRY, BOY WONDER,

BUT I'VE GOT A FEELING

I'M GONNA BE NEEDED
BACK ON THE ISLAND TONIGHT.

SURPRISE!

AH!

BET YOU NEVER EXPECTED
TO SEE ME HERE TONIGHT,
DID YOU?

YEAH. I ASSUMED
YOU WERE WORKING.

WELL, I LET KENNY
TAKE THE LATE FLIGHT
TO PROVINCETOWN.

ARE YOU SURE HE'S READY?

OH, YEAH, HE'S A GREAT KID.

DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.
AND VERY ACCOMPLISHED
PILOT, TOO.

HE ONLY LOST HIS POISE
ONE TIME TODAY

AND THAT'S WHEN
THE PASSENGERS PLAYED
KEEP-AWAY WITH HIS HAT.

WELL, I HOPE YOU STOPPED IT.

STOPPED IT? I STARTED IT.

SAY, WAS IT A GOOD THING
I GOT BACK HERE IN TIME?

IN TIME? FOR WHAT?

THE FIGHT, DUMMY.
GEORGE FOREMAN,
GERRY COONEY.

GEE, THAT SOUNDS ONLY
SLIGHTLY MORE EXCITING

THAN WATCHING
A COUPLE OF OLD GUYS
FIGHT OVER A DINNER ROLL.

OH, COME ON, JOE.
I THOUGHT YOU'D WANNA SEE IT.

SO, I CALLED UP
THE CABLE COMPANY
AND I ORDERED IT.

IT'S ONLY COSTING YOU $21.95.

BRIAN, I CAN'T TONIGHT.
I--I MEAN,

NORMALLY I'D LOVE TO,
BUT, UH, I CAN'T BECAUSE
I, UH, I HAVE A--A, UH--

AN APPOINTMENT.

OH, AN APPOINTMENT, HUH?

LIKE, UH, LIKE IN BUSINESS?

YEAH. THAT'S RIGHT.

A BUSINESS APPOINTMENT.
HMM.

[sniffing]

EXACTLY WHERE'D YOU MEET
THIS GUY, JOE?

ALL RIGHT. OK, IT'S NOT
AN APPOINTMENT EXACTLY, UH,

SO MUCH AS A, UH...

THE "D" WORD?

YEAH. A DATE, OK?

OOH, YOU OLD HORN DOG.
HEY, YOU GOT A HOT DATE, HUH?

NO.

WELL, TAKE A TIP
FROM THE MASTER.

FLUSH THAT COLOGNE, MAN.
IT'S TOXIC.

REALLY? YOU DON'T LIKE IT?
TERRIBLE.

THAT'S A RELIEF.

IT'S ONLY WHEN
YOU LIKE SOMETHING,
I START TO WORRY.

SO, UM, WHY IS THIS BIG DATE
SUCH A SECRET?

IS IT ANYBODY I KNOW?

JUST SOMEONE
I WENT TO HIGH SCHOOL WITH.

YEAH, YEAH, YEAH?

OH, YOU MEAN, LIKE,
WHAT'S HER NAME?

YEAH.
OH, WELL, IT'S, UH,

MAUREEN MULHEARN.

MAUREEN MULHEARN?

OH, MY GOD!
I REMEMBER HER.

HOW'S SHE MANAGING, ANYHOW?

FINE. WHY?

OH, I FIGURED SHE MIGHT HAVE
SOME PSYCHOLOGICAL PROBLEMS

AFTER LOSIN' HER LEG
IN THAT SHARK ATTACK.

WHAT? OH.

NO, NO. SHE DOESN'T LET IT
BOTHER HER.

OH, SHE'S A BRAVE GIRL.
BRAVE GIRL.

NEVER UNDERSTOOD
WHY SHE WANTED TO ATTACK
THAT SHARK IN THE FIRST PLACE.

YOU REALLY GONNA WEAR
THAT SHIRT, JOE?

IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT,
ABSOLUTELY.

SO WHERE YOU TAKIN'
OLD MAUREEN?

SKATIN'?

TABLE-HOPPIN'?

ALL RIGHT. OK.
IT'S NOT MAUREEN.

I MADE THAT UP
BECAUSE IT'S SOMEONE
THAT YOU DON'T KNOW

AND I'D LIKE TO
KEEP IT THAT WAY.

JOE, YOU WOUND ME.

WISH I HAD TIME.

ALL RIGHT. WELL, GO.
GOOD. GO WITH MY BLESSING.

HAVE A GREAT TIME

AND LET'S JUST HOPE THAT
AT SOME ROMANTIC MOMENT

YOU DON'T DEVELOP THAT,
YOU KNOW, N-N-NERVOUS
LITTLE S-STAMMER

YOU SOMETIMES GET.
OH, NO. NO, NO, YOU DON'T.

YOU'VE PSYCHED ME OUT
WITH THAT TOO MANY TIMES.
I'M NOT PSYCHING YOU OUT.

I AM WISE TO YOU, BRIAN.
COME ON.

YOU'RE NOT PLANTING
ANY LITTLE PSYCHOLOGICAL
TIME BOMBS IN MY HEAD.

OK. ALL RIGHT.
YOU GOT ME. YOU GOT ME.
GO AHEAD. GO.

HAVE A GREAT TIME. GO ON.

INCIDENTALLY,
LOVE THAT TIE.

[whistling]

THAT WAS
A WONDERFUL CHARDONNAY
YOU CHOSE WITH DINNER TONIGHT.

I DIDN'T KNOW YOU KNEW
SO MUCH ABOUT WINE.

AH, IT WAS NOTHING, REALLY.

I JUST WENT DOWN
THE RIGHT SIDE
OF THE WINE LIST.

WHERE THE PRICES ARE?
RIGHT.

CHOSE THE FIRST ONE
THAT DIDN'T MAKE
MY HEART STOP.

[giggling]

YOU KNOW, I HAD MY QUALMS
ABOUT THIS EVENING

BUT I THINK WE HANDLED IT
PRETTY WELL.

NO PRESSURE OF ANY SORT.
NO EMBARRASSMENT.

YEAH.

[crickets chirping]

WHY ARE WE STOPPING?
WHERE ARE WE?

GUESS.

OH, MY GOD! INDIAN POINT.

OH. YOU RECOGNIZE IT?

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

I HAVEN'T SEEN
SO MANY BOUNCING CARS
SINCE THE MOVIE EARTHQUAKE.

SO, JOE,
WHAT DID YOU HAVE IN MIND?

[giggling]
NOTHING. H-HONESTLY.
I DIDN'T PLAN THIS.

OH, DID WE RUN OUT OF GAS?

COME ON. WHERE'S
YOUR SPIRIT OF ROMANCE?

NO. ROMANCE IS SOFT MUSIC
AND CANDLELIGHT.

THIS IS KIDS WITH ACNE
MAKING OUT.

JOE,
THIS DOESN'T SEEM LIKE YOU.

MAYBE YOU'RE SEEING
A DIFFERENT SIDE OF ME.

A SIDE OF ME YOU NEVER
KNEW--KNEW--KNEW THAT--

D-D-DAMN IT, BRIAN.

WELL, MAYBE IT'S A SIDE OF YOU
I WOULDN'T MIND SEEING.

OH, OH, CRAMP!
WHAT? OH.

CRAMP. CRAMP. CRAMP.
OH.

(boy #1)
HEY, THAT'S MY CELLO TEACHER.
YO, MISS CHAPEL!

OH, GOD.

[horn blaring]

(boy #2)
HEY, SHUT UP!

AS YOU MAY HAVE GUESSED,

I'M NOT REALLY
AN OLD HAND AT THIS.

NO.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

SHALL WE TAKE
ANOTHER STAB AT IT?

SURE, WHY NOT?

HEY, CAPTAIN HACKETT?

HEY, I THOUGHT IT WAS YOU.
LAST FLIGHT WENT GREAT.

AND LOOK WHAT I GOT
FROM SALLY BERNETTI.

DOING BETTER THAN I AM, KID.
BEAT IT.

OH, YES, SIR.

I'LL SEE YOU TOMORROW
AFTER SCHOOL.

[both laughing]

THIS IS REALLY WEIRD.

YOU'RE TELLIN' ME.

COME ON, HELEN.
I THINK WE CAN DO THIS.

LET'S REALLY CONCENTRATE.

[both laughing]

NO, I DON'T THINK SO, JOE.

ONCE MORE.
NO.

HEY, ONCE MORE.
BE SERIOUS.

SERIOUS.

IT'S NOT SO FUNNY ANYMORE,
IS IT?

UH-UH.

OH, JOE. JOE, HOLD ON.

WE HAVE TO STOP FOR A SECOND.

OH, Y-YOU MEAN,
GET IN THE BACKSEAT, MAYBE?

NO, I MEAN,
WE'RE MOVING REALLY FAST

AND WE NEED TO STOP AND THINK
ABOUT WHAT THIS MEANS

BEFORE WE, YOU KNOW...

LET HER RIP?

WELL, I DON'T THINK
THAT'S QUITE THE WAY
BYRON WOULD HAVE PUT IT.

BUT I THINK THAT'S
KIND OF WHERE WE'RE HEADED.

I MEAN, WE COULD BE
DIFFERENT AFTER TONIGHT.

WE COULD BE LOVERS.

I MEAN, PEOPLE WHO HAVE
AN INTIMATE KNOWLEDGE
ABOUT EACH OTHER.

WE'RE TALKIN'
APPENDIX SCARS HERE, JOE.

I DON'T HAVE
AN APPENDIX SCAR.

I THINK YOU'RE TAKING ME
MUCH TOO LITERALLY.

YEAH, WELL, I--I JUST
MEANT THAT--

JOE, ANY WAY YOU LOOK AT IT,
THINGS ARE GONNA CHANGE.

OUR RELATIONSHIP AT WORK,

YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH BRIAN.

MINE, TOO.

WE CAN NEVER BE
THE 3 MUSKETEERS AGAIN.

SO IF WE'RE GONNA DO THIS,
WE SHOULD KEEP IN MIND

THE PASSING
OF 3 BEAUTIFUL FRIENDSHIPS

AND A LOT OF LOVELY MEMORIES.

SO, HOW WAS IT FOR YOU?

I DON'T THINK
WE'RE QUITE READY
FOR THIS YET.

SO, WE'RE--WE'RE TAKING
THINGS SLOWLY.

THERE'S NOTHING WRONG
WITH THAT.

JOE, WE'VE KNOWN EACH OTHER
FOR 20 YEARS.

IT IS THE LONGEST RUN
TO FIRST BASE IN HISTORY.

I THOUGHT WE GOT TO 2ND BASE.

NO. BUT I THINK KENNY DID.

AND FROM THE LOOKS OF IT,
HE'S HALFWAY TO 3RD.

LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.

IT'S BEEN A LONG DAY.

YEAH,
I'M KIND OF BEAT MYSELF.

AND I'M CERTAINLY
NOT GETTING ANY REST
BACK HERE.

HEY! BRIAN!
BRIAN!