Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place (1998–2001): Season 3, Episode 22 - Another Moving Script - full transcript
Shawn appears at Johnny and Sharon's place. She is pregnant and needs a partner at her Lamaze class. Johnny volunteers but Sharon is not entirely happy. Pete has been mopping the floors at the fire station and Marti injured herself when she slipped on the wet floor. She goes to the hospital where she meets Berg and he asks her out. Pete is not happy when this happens. Germ is taking his orderly job at the hospital far too seriously and is starting to irritate the staff.
WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN ALL MORNING?
WORKING. I GOT
EVERYTHING DONE EARLY.
SO WE COULD DO SOMETHING
FUN THIS AFTERNOON.
YOU COULD WALK ME TO THE
SOUP KITCHEN AT THE MISSION!
OR WE COULD STAY HOME
AND I COULD PUT BUGS ON YOU.
SORRY, BUT THEY EXPECT
ME THERE IN HALF AN HOUR.
LET'S DO SOMETHING AFTER.
HOW LONG COULD IT TAKE?
THEN I'M GOING TO THE HOSPITAL.
I'M READING "VALLEY
OF THE DOLLS"
TO THE CHILDREN'S WARD.
OKAY, IT WAS MY IDEA.
WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO
WHEN YOU'RE SAVING THE WORLD?
I'M BORED.
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
A LOT OF PEOPLE DRINK
WHEN THEY'RE ALONE.
SHAWN!
I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN SO LONG!
AND I'M PREGNANT!
MORE SPECIFICALLY,
I HAVEN'T SEEN
YOU IN OVER A YEAR.
HEY, SHAWN, WOW!
COME IN, SIT DOWN.
I'M SORRY TO COME UNANNOUNCED.
I'M IN THE CITY FOR
MY LAMAZE CLASS,
AND I HAD AN HOUR TO KILL.
I THOUGHT I'D SAY HI.
YOU DIDN'T TELL ME
SHAWN WAS MARRIED.
I'M NOT.
Say something!
UH, DO WE EVER GET
TO MEET THE DAD?
HE DIED.
AT LEAST I HOPE HE DIED.
OH, WOW, SO YOU'RE ALL ALONE?
WHO'S YOUR LAMAZE PARTNER?
I DON'T HAVE ONE.
MAYBE THEY'LL PAIR YOU UP WITH
SOMEONE WHEN YOU GET THERE.
I'M SURE THERE WILL BE
GUYS THERE WITHOUT GIRLS.
LISTEN, SHARON, I KNOW I'M
NOT YOUR FAVORITE PERSON
BECAUSE OF WHAT HAPPENED
WITH JOHNNY AND ME,
BUT I'M IN THIS ALL ALONE
AND I'VE GOT NO
ONE ELSE TO TURN TO.
Oh.
HAVE YOU TRIED RELIGION?
ACTUALLY, I WAS LOOKING
FOR A LAMAZE PARTNER.
OH.
YOU KNOW WHAT?
I'M NOT REALLY DOING
ANYTHING. I'LL HELP YOU.
IS THAT OKAY?
SHARON?
OH! [LAUGHS]
SURE!
[LAUGHING]
IT'LL BE GOOD PRACTICE
FOR WHEN WE HAVE A BABY.
WE'RE GETTING MARRIED.
CONGRATULATIONS.
SO THIS ISN'T A PROBLEM?
NO, IT MIGHT BE FUN.
AS LONG AS YOU DON'T
DELIVER ON OUR WEDDING DAY.
WE'RE GETTING MARRIED!
DO NOT WORRY. YOU
ARE IN GOOD HANDS.
I ONCE HELPED MY
DOG HAVE PUPPIES.
I EVEN STOPPED HER
FROM EATING ONE.
OH, BOY, THAT'S FUNNY.
LOVE IS... FOLDING THE
LAUNDRY TOGETHER.
DON'T YOU JUST LOVE THOSE?
ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I
THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE.
YOU KNOW WHAT LOVE IS?
LOVE IS SHARING THE
SAME TASTE IN CARTOONS.
I KNOW!
MY BOYFRIEND CUTS THEM
OUT FOR ME EVERY DAY.
[GIGGLES]
LOVE IS... CHEATING
ON YOUR BOYFRIEND!
OH?
STEALING TOILET PAPER? ICE.
IN SOME COUNTRIES, IF
THEY CATCH YOU DOING THAT,
THEY'LL CUT OFF YOUR ASS.
EVERYBODY, FREEZE!
WE'VE HAD A ROBBERY!
HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY!
I SPENT TWO HOURS ON THAT FLOOR.
YOU DIDN'T DO A VERY GOOD JOB.
THERE'S A BUNCH
OF MUD BEHIND ME.
GIVE ME THAT. YOU'RE
DOING IT WRONG ANYWAYS.
OKAY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
YOU NEED TO USE
CIRCULAR MOTIONS.
IT'S FIGURE EIGHTS.
IT'S FIGURE EIGHTS, ALL RIGHT?
SEE? SEE, HUH?
HOW THE MOP, IT GLIDES
ALONG ALL THE WHILE?
IT'S PICKING UP MORE MUD.
I JUST FIND INTERESTING
THAT THE MOP IS LEADING.
THERE IS A RIGHT WAY AND
A WRONG WAY TO DO THINGS.
THERE IS A PETE WAY
AND THERE'S A MARTI WAY.
I'M GONNA SHOW YOU AGAIN.
GIVE IT! NO!
ALL RIGHT, QUIT FLIRTING
AND GET SOME WORK DONE.
I'M NOT FLIRTING.
I'D RATHER FLIRT WITH YOU.
CAPTAIN, SIR.
SMOOTH, MOP BOY.
I GOTTA GO CHANGE.
WILL YOU DO ME A FAVOR?
WOULD YOU PUT THAT
SIGN IN THE OTHER ROOM?
SURE.
IT DOES LOOK A
LITTLE HEAVY FOR YOU.
[THUD] OWW!
ARE YOU OKAY?
YOU COULD'VE WARNED ME
THAT THE FLOOR WAS WET.
YEAH, YOU SEE...
ILLITERACY IS THE SILENT KILLER.
I THINK I HURT MY SHOULDER.
OWW!
DID I MENTION I
HURT MY SHOULDER?!
MEANING, PERHAPS, YOU
SHOULDN'T TOUCH IT?!
MAYBE I SHOULD GET
YOU TO A HOSPITAL.
NO, SOMEBODY HAS TO STAY HERE.
OUR CO-WORKERS AREN'T
GONNA INJURE THEMSELVES.
HEY, HOW'S IT GOING?
GREAT.
MAYBE SOMEDAY THEY'LL LET
ME CLEAN UP AT THE MAYO CLINIC
HANG IN THERE.
YOU'LL BE BACK ON
ROUNDS IN NO TIME.
AHA! TAKING GAUZE.
DO YOU HAVE A
REQUISITION FOR THAT?
NO, I HAVE A BLEEDING PATIENT.
CONVENIENT.
HEY, BERG.
YES, GERM?
WHEN YOU AND DR. WALKER
WERE GOING OUT,
DID YOU NOTICE ANYTHING
MISSING IN THE MORNINGS?
OFTEN MY DIGNITY AND
SENSE OF SELF-WORTH.
THIS ISN'T A GAME, MAN!
YOU THINK THIS IS A GAME?!
I AM SO GLAD I GOT HIM THIS JOB.
EXCUSE ME?
HI.
HI.
I'M... I'M... I'M... I'M DOC...
DOC... DOCTOR BERGEN...
DOCTOR... DOCTOR BERGEN...
DOCTOR MICHAEL LESLIE BERG...
PEOPLE CALL ME "BABBLE."
YEAH, WHAT IS THE
QUICKEST WAY OUT OF HERE?
FULL-BLOWN ANEURYSM.
SO, YOU'RE A DOCTOR?
I'M GUESSING YOU'RE PREPPING
THE COUNTER FOR SURGERY?
NO, NO, I JUST DO
THIS TO STAY HUMBLE.
IT KEEPS MY GOD COMPLEXIN CHECK.
WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE YOU'VE GOT
YOUR WORK CUT OUT FOR YOU.
LET'S SEE, YOU HURT YOUR ANKLE.
NO.
AH... SHOULDER!
LET'S SEE WHAT THEY'RE GIVING
YOU FOR THAT SHOULDER THERE.
OH, YEAH. YEAH,
JUST AS I SUSPECTED.
YOU SEE THAT?
THEY LEFT OUT
"DINNER AND A MOVIE."
YOU MEAN LIKE A DATE?
WELL, I'M FLATTERED.
OH, I DON'T KNOW.
I JUST MET YOU.
[Grunting] I JUST MET YOU
AND I DON'T SEEM TO CARE.
WHAT DO YOU SAY, YOU KNOW?
IT'LL BE FUN.
AH, WHAT THE HELL?
NO ONE ELSE IS ASKING ME OUT.
[LAUGHS] THAT'S THE WAY TO
BUILD A MAN'S SELF-ESTEEM.
SHE DIDN'T EVEN CALL.
SHE DIDN'T EVEN CALL TO
LET ME KNOW SHE WAS OKAY.
I'M NOT GONNA FEEL
GUILTY ABOUT IT ANYMORE.
SHE SLIPPED, SHE FELL, SO WHAT?
BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?
IF YOU CAN'T HANDLE A
LITTLE WATER ON THE FLOOR,
THEN MAYBE FIRE
FIGHTING ISN'T FOR YOU.
HEY, HOW DOES THIS LOOK?
LIKE THE SUIT YOU
WEAR ON EVERY DATE.
WELL, I'M NOT GONNA
WEAR MY BREAKUP SUIT.
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
OOH! THAT'S HER, THAT'S HER!
CAN YOU GET THAT?
I DON'T WANNA COME OFF ANXIOUS.
MARTI?
DWEEB?
YOU TWO KNOW EACH OTHER?
YEAH, THIS IS MARTI.
I WORK WITH HER.
REMEMBER, I WAS TELLING
YOU ABOUT THE GIRL
WHO HURT HER SHOULDER
AND WENT TO THE HOSPITAL
WHILE YOU WERE GETTING
READY FOR YOUR DATE
WITH THE GIRL YOU
MET AT THE HOSPITAL,
WHO I'M GUESSING
HURT HER SHOULDER.
I BET IF I WERE
PAYING ATTENTION,
I WOULD'VE PUT THAT TOGETHER.
HOW'S YOUR ARM? HOW'S YOUR ARM?
IT'S FINE... FINE.
LISTEN, COULD YOU WAIT
FOR ME DOWN ON THE STOOP?
I LIKE TO... YOU KNOW,
MAKE AN ENTRANCE.
YEAH, YEAH, SURE.
OKAY.
WHOA.
THIS IS WEIRDER THAN THAT NIGHT
WE BOTH RENTED "TANGO & CASH."
PETE, YOU KNOW, I
REALLY DIDN'T KNOW.
IS THIS GONNA BE A PROBLEM?
NO, NOT FOR ME. YOU'RE
GOING OUT WITH HER.
YEAH, BUT THIS IS FIREGIRL.
YOU'RE ALWAYS TALKING ABOUT HER.
I'M ALWAYS TALKING ABOUT
HER BECAUSE I CAN'T STAND HER.
GO, DON'T BE CRAZY.
HAVE A GOOD TIME.
LISTEN, I'M GONNA CANCEL.
I'M NOT A CHILD.
IF I WANTED TO GO OUT WITH
HER, I'D GO OUT WITH HER.
ARE YOU SURE?
YES, I'M SURE. NOW GO!
OKAY. ALL RIGHT.
OKAY. ALL RIGHT.
I CAN'T BELIEVE HE WENT.
WE'RE GOING TO NEED MORE
URINAL CAKES FOR THE MEN'S ROOM.
BUT, SIR, I JUST REPLACED
THEM THE OTHER DAY.
PETE, THESE MEN
ARE FIREFIGHTERS.
THEY SEE A URINAL
CAKE AS A CHALLENGE.
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.
I'LL GET RIGHT ON IT.
SORRY I'M LATE.
I TOLD YOU BEFORE,
"LATE" DOESN'T CUT IT HERE!
IS THAT WHAT YOU'LL TELL PEOPLE
WHO WATCHED THEIR HOUSE BURN?!
I THINK WHAT SHE MEANS
IS SORRY SHE'S LATE
FROM GETTING BACK
FROM THE STORE, WHERE I SENT
HER TO GET SOME PROVOLONE.
I LOVE PROVOLONE.
GOOD WORK, KID.
MAKE ME A SANDWICH, DUNVILLE.
I'D LOVE TO, SIR.
[DOOR CLOSES]
WELL, THAT WAS
SURPRISINGLY NICE OF YOU.
NEVER MIND THAT.
RUN ALONG AND GET
SOME PROVOLONE!
WELL, THANKS.
I DIDN'T HEAR MY ALARM GO OFF.
I WAS OUT KIND OF LATE..
LAST NIGHT, WHEN I WENT OUT...
YOU KNOW, FOR DINNER.
OH, RIGHT, RIGHT.
WAS THAT LAST NIGHT?
AREN'T YOU GONNA
ASK ME HOW IT WAS?
NO, I'VE HAD DINNER BEFORE.
I HAD A NICE TIME,
BUT IF THIS IS GONNA BE
A PROBLEM FOR YOU, I
TOTALLY UNDERSTAND.
WHY WOULD IT BE A PROBLEM?
HE DIDN'T USE MY CREDIT
CARD AGAIN, DID HE?
NO... BECAUSE, YOU KNOW,
HE'S YOUR ROOMMATE,
AND IT COULD BE AWKWARD
FOR, UH, YOU AND ME.
THERE IS NO "YOU AND ME."
THERE'S YOU, OVER THERE, AND
THERE'S ME, RIGHT HERE... WAY
TOTALLY SEPARATE.
WELL, THEN, IF IT'SNOT
BOTHER YOU... GONNA
GO OUT WITH HIM
AGAIN. SEE IF I CARE.
I THINK I WILL!
WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
I'M GONNA CALL HIM.
NEED HIS NUMBER?
I'VE GOT IT!
FINE. CALL HIM!
I CAN'T BELIEVE
SHE'S GONNA CALL HIM.
VERY NICE.
NOW BREATHE WITH YOUR PARTNER.
REMEMBER, GENTLEMEN,
THIS IS ALL ABOUT MOMMY NOW.
YOU DID THIS TO HER.
NOW HELP HER.
OH, VERY GOOD, YOU TWO...
EXCELLENT BREATHING.
NONSMOKER.
HEY, GUYS!
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
I THOUGHT YOU WERE
AT THE SOUP KITCHEN.
IT'S OKAY.
THEY THINK I'M GETTING CRACKERS.
OKAY, GENTLEMEN, LET MOMMY
KNOW YOU'RE THERE FOR HER.
GENTLY RUB YOUR PARTNER'S BACK.
[LAUGHS]
LIKE RUBBING'S GONNA HELP
WHEN YOU'RE TRYING
TO PASSA BASKETBALL.
VERY NICE, JOHNNY.
IT'S GREAT TO SEE SUCH
AN ATTENTIVE HUSBAND.
NO, NO, NO HE'S MINE.
HE'S NOT MINE,
BUT HE'S GONNA BE.
HE'S JUST GONNA HELP
SHAWN DELIVER THIS BABY,
AND THEN BEFORE YOU
KNOW IT, HE'S MINE AGAIN!
OKAY, BUT RIGHT NOW,
THIS IS A LAMAZE CLASS,
NOT A BOBSLED RUN.
SO I'D APPRECIATE IT
IF YOU WAIT OUTSIDE.
OH, THAT'S OKAY. I'M GOOD.
UM, HONEY, WE WON'T
BE MUCH LONGER.
WHY DON'T I MEET YOU AT HOME?
OH, OKAY.
BUT WHO ARE WE KIDDING?
YOU'RE ALL GETTING EPIDURALS.
OUT!
HEY, DR. WALKER, YOU
FINISHED WITH THAT SODA?
YES, I GUESS SO.WHY?
THREE WORDS... "D. N. A."
THERE ARE FINGERPRINTS
ALL OVER THIS CAN...
THAT WILL MATCH THE
ONES ON THAT CABINET!
WHICH CABINET? THAT CABINET?
THE CABINET I GET MEDICAL
SUPPLIES OUT OF EVERY DAY
AS PART OF MY JOB?
YEAH.
IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE
THAT I CAN HELP YOU WITH?
JUST ONE MORE THING I
CAN'T GET OUT OF MY HEAD.
THE LICE?
NO.
CAN YOU GET TO
THE POINT? I'M BUSY.
I THINK YOU DID IT. I
JUST NEED THE PROOF.
I DID IT.
REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY.
TOO BAD. I STILL
THINK YOU DID IT.
I TOOK YOUR STUPID ROLL
OF TOILET PAPER, OKAY?
I DIDN'T HAVE TIME
TO GO TO THE STORE,
SO I REACHED IN AND TOOK IT.
HERE IS $10.
GO AND BUY YOURSELF
50 ROLLS OF TOILET PAPER.
IT'S NOT ABOUT THE MONEY.
I'M JUST A LOWLY
ORDERLY IN YOUR EYES,
BUT I'M IN CHARGE
OF THAT CABINET.
AND BELIEVE IT OR NOT,
I TAKE A GREAT DEAL
OF PRIDE IN MY JOB.
AND I KNOW EVERYONE AROUND HERE
LOVES TO HAVE A GOOD
LAUGH AT THE GERM'S EXPENSE.
WHAT IF I WENT INTO SURGERY
AND JUST HELPED
MYSELF TO A KIDNEY
BECAUSE I DIDN'T HAVE TIME
TO STOP AT THE KIDNEY PLACE?
THAT WOULDN'T BE
VERY GOOD, WOULD IT?
NO.
NO, IT WOULDN'T, GERM.
I'M SORRY.
ALL RIGHT.
YOU WANT TO GO OUT WITH ME?
WELL, WELL, WELL.
LOOK WHO'S HOME FROM
PREGNANCY DATING SCHOOL.
SORRY, HONEY.
THEY ASKED SHAWN
AND METO STAY LATE.
THEY TOOK OUR
PICTURE FOR A POSTER.
OH, WELL, I'M NOT SURPRISED.
YOU TWO MAKE SUCH
A BEAUTIFUL COUPLE.
WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM?
YOU SAID IT WAS OKAY.
BECAUSE, JOHNNY, YOU
PUT ME ON THE SPOT.
YOU KNOW HOW YOU FEEL
WHEN YOU HELP THE HOMELESS.
I FEEL THAT WAY
WHEN I HELP SHAWN.
SEE, I DON'T WRAP MY LEGS
AROUND HOMELESS PEOPLE
AND RUB THEIR BACKS.
SHARON, SOMEONE NEEDED ME.
NO ONE'S NEEDED ME
AROUND HERE FOR A LONG TIME.
DON'T THINK THAT'S
GONE UNNOTICED.
BESIDES, YOU'RE TOO
BUSY SAVING THE WORLD
TO HAVE ANY TIME FOR ME.
IF IT'S NOT THE HOMELESS,
IT'S THE OLD FOLKS OR
THE SPOTTED OWL OR TUNA.
DOLPHINS.
WHAT?
DOLPHINS... NOBODY'S
TRYING TO SAVE THE TUNA!
WELL, WHATEVER IT
IS, IT COMES BEFORE ME.
THIS IS HEALTHY.
I GET A LITTLE BUSY, AND
YOU TRY TO PUNISH ME
WITH THE FIRST PREGNANT
TRAMP THAT WALKS TO THE DOOR?!
THAT'S WHAT IT TAKES
FOR YOU TO GIVE
ME THE TIME OF DAY!
FACE IT, SHARON, WE
ARE DRIFTING APART!
FRANKLY, I DON'T LIKE IT!
WELL, I DON'T LIKE
WAITING UP TO YELL AT YOU
AND THEN HAVING YOU
YELL AT ME, FRANKLY!
WELL, IT DOESN'T MATTER
BECAUSE I'M GOING TO BED!
SLEEP IN THE OTHER ROOM.
GOOD!
GOOD NIGHT!
[Singsong voice] CAN'T HEAR YOU!
I HAD A GREAT TIME TONIGHT.
YOU KNOW, I'VE NEVER
CAUGHTA PUCK BEFORE.
THANKS FOR LETTING ME KEEP IT.
YOU WERE THE ONE WHO KNOCKED
THE OLD LADY OUT OF THE WAY.
SO, YOU WANNA GRAB THAT DRINK?
YEAH, SURE... OH, WAIT.
PETE'S NOT IN THERE, IS HE?
NO, THEY WERE SHORT-HANDEDAT
THE FIRE STATION.
ONE OF THE VOLUNTEERS
HAD A HOT DATE.
YOU KNOW, I HAVE TO SAY,
I LOVE HOCKEY, YOU KNOW?
IT'S SO MANLY AND RUGGED.
DID YOU EVER PLAY?
NO... WELL, SORT OF.
I USED TO FIGURE SKATE
IN THE THIRD GRADE.
WHICH IS, UH, WHICH
IS LIKE HOCKEY,
EXCEPT YOUR DAD'S LESS PROUD.
YOU KNOW... I'M HAVING
A REALLY GOOD TIME.
WELL, THE NIGHT'S NOT OVER.
PAY NO ATTENTION TO ME.
PETE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
I FORGOT MY COAT.
IT'S 75 DEGREES OUT.
IT'S A LIGHT COAT.
MAYBE I LEFT IT IN THE BEDROOM,
BUT JUST PRETEND I'M NOT HERE.
UM... I'M SORRY ABOUT THAT.
NO, NO, IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT.
HE'S JUST ACTING LIKE AN IDIOT.
HE IS SUCH A BABOON.
THAT'S WHY WE NEVER
PHOTOGRAPH HIM FROM BEHIND.
I'M SORRY. LISTEN TO ME.
WHY DON'T WE DO WHAT HE
SAYS AND PRETEND HE'S NOT HERE?
GOOD LUCK.
OKAY, FOUND MY COAT, BUT NOW...
LOST MY KEYS
I THINK I DROPPED
THE MON THE FLOOR.
MOVE YOUR LEG.
AND AGAIN.
I'M NOT HERE.
THAT MAKES TWO OF US.
WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
I CAN'T DO THIS. I'M SORRY.
[GRUNTS]
THERE THEY ARE.
THEY'RE IN MY OTHER
POCKET. WHOOPS!
ALWAYS THE LAST PLACE
YOU LOOK. OFF I GO!
HEY, PETE!
IF YOU LIKED HER,
WHY DIDN'T YOU
JUST SAY SOMETHING
AND STOP WITH THE
CHILDISH GAMES?
I'M NOT PLAYING ANY GAMES.
IF YOU'RE SUPPOSED
TO BEAT THE FIREHOUSE,
THEN WHY DO YOU SUDDENLY
SHOW UP BACK HERE?
TO PRETEND TO GET MY
COAT AND RUIN YOUR DATE.
I KNEW IT.
FUNNY... YOU KNEW THAT,
BUT YOU DIDN'T KNOW THAT I
WANTED TO GO OUT WITH HER.
YOU TOLD ME TO GO OUT WITH HER.
YOU TOLD HER TO CALL ME.
WHERE IN THAT DO
I GET, "BACK OFF"?
SINCE WHEN DO I HAVE TO
SPELL THINGS OUT FOR YOU?
WHY SHOULD I HAVE TO GUESS?
WHEN I WANT
SOMETHING, I SAY I WANT IT.
IT'S LIKE WHEN YOU SAID
YOU DIDN'T WANT THAT
LAST DOUGHNUT, SO I ATE IT.
AND I WANTED THAT DOUGHNUT!
AND I WANTED THAT DOUGHNUT!
BUT YOU COULDN'T SAY IT!
YOU JUST LET IT SIT THERE
FOR A WEEK AND A HALF.
EVENTUALLY, SOMEONE
WAS GONNA EAT IT.
YEAH, YEAH, YOU KNOW WHO?
THE SLEAZEBALL WHO SHOVES
HIS BEST FRIEND TO THE SIDE!
NO, ACTUALLY, IT'S THE ONE
WHO'S MAN ENOUGH TO TAKE IT.
YOU KNEW I LIKED HER AND
YOU WENT AFTER HER ANYWAY!
YOU KNOW WHAT YOUR PROBLEM IS?
YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU WANT...
WHAT WOMAN, WHAT
JOB, WHAT NOTHING.
YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WANT,
BUT YOU'RE NEVER GONNA GET IT.
I'D LIKE A NEW ROOMMATE.
I WANT ONE, TOO.
FINE! I'M SLEEPING ON THE COUCH!
FINE![SLAMS DOOR]
WHICH IS JUST STUPID
BECAUSE I HAVE MY OWN ROOM!
WORKING. I GOT
EVERYTHING DONE EARLY.
SO WE COULD DO SOMETHING
FUN THIS AFTERNOON.
YOU COULD WALK ME TO THE
SOUP KITCHEN AT THE MISSION!
OR WE COULD STAY HOME
AND I COULD PUT BUGS ON YOU.
SORRY, BUT THEY EXPECT
ME THERE IN HALF AN HOUR.
LET'S DO SOMETHING AFTER.
HOW LONG COULD IT TAKE?
THEN I'M GOING TO THE HOSPITAL.
I'M READING "VALLEY
OF THE DOLLS"
TO THE CHILDREN'S WARD.
OKAY, IT WAS MY IDEA.
WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO
WHEN YOU'RE SAVING THE WORLD?
I'M BORED.
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
A LOT OF PEOPLE DRINK
WHEN THEY'RE ALONE.
SHAWN!
I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN SO LONG!
AND I'M PREGNANT!
MORE SPECIFICALLY,
I HAVEN'T SEEN
YOU IN OVER A YEAR.
HEY, SHAWN, WOW!
COME IN, SIT DOWN.
I'M SORRY TO COME UNANNOUNCED.
I'M IN THE CITY FOR
MY LAMAZE CLASS,
AND I HAD AN HOUR TO KILL.
I THOUGHT I'D SAY HI.
YOU DIDN'T TELL ME
SHAWN WAS MARRIED.
I'M NOT.
Say something!
UH, DO WE EVER GET
TO MEET THE DAD?
HE DIED.
AT LEAST I HOPE HE DIED.
OH, WOW, SO YOU'RE ALL ALONE?
WHO'S YOUR LAMAZE PARTNER?
I DON'T HAVE ONE.
MAYBE THEY'LL PAIR YOU UP WITH
SOMEONE WHEN YOU GET THERE.
I'M SURE THERE WILL BE
GUYS THERE WITHOUT GIRLS.
LISTEN, SHARON, I KNOW I'M
NOT YOUR FAVORITE PERSON
BECAUSE OF WHAT HAPPENED
WITH JOHNNY AND ME,
BUT I'M IN THIS ALL ALONE
AND I'VE GOT NO
ONE ELSE TO TURN TO.
Oh.
HAVE YOU TRIED RELIGION?
ACTUALLY, I WAS LOOKING
FOR A LAMAZE PARTNER.
OH.
YOU KNOW WHAT?
I'M NOT REALLY DOING
ANYTHING. I'LL HELP YOU.
IS THAT OKAY?
SHARON?
OH! [LAUGHS]
SURE!
[LAUGHING]
IT'LL BE GOOD PRACTICE
FOR WHEN WE HAVE A BABY.
WE'RE GETTING MARRIED.
CONGRATULATIONS.
SO THIS ISN'T A PROBLEM?
NO, IT MIGHT BE FUN.
AS LONG AS YOU DON'T
DELIVER ON OUR WEDDING DAY.
WE'RE GETTING MARRIED!
DO NOT WORRY. YOU
ARE IN GOOD HANDS.
I ONCE HELPED MY
DOG HAVE PUPPIES.
I EVEN STOPPED HER
FROM EATING ONE.
OH, BOY, THAT'S FUNNY.
LOVE IS... FOLDING THE
LAUNDRY TOGETHER.
DON'T YOU JUST LOVE THOSE?
ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I
THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE.
YOU KNOW WHAT LOVE IS?
LOVE IS SHARING THE
SAME TASTE IN CARTOONS.
I KNOW!
MY BOYFRIEND CUTS THEM
OUT FOR ME EVERY DAY.
[GIGGLES]
LOVE IS... CHEATING
ON YOUR BOYFRIEND!
OH?
STEALING TOILET PAPER? ICE.
IN SOME COUNTRIES, IF
THEY CATCH YOU DOING THAT,
THEY'LL CUT OFF YOUR ASS.
EVERYBODY, FREEZE!
WE'VE HAD A ROBBERY!
HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY!
I SPENT TWO HOURS ON THAT FLOOR.
YOU DIDN'T DO A VERY GOOD JOB.
THERE'S A BUNCH
OF MUD BEHIND ME.
GIVE ME THAT. YOU'RE
DOING IT WRONG ANYWAYS.
OKAY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
YOU NEED TO USE
CIRCULAR MOTIONS.
IT'S FIGURE EIGHTS.
IT'S FIGURE EIGHTS, ALL RIGHT?
SEE? SEE, HUH?
HOW THE MOP, IT GLIDES
ALONG ALL THE WHILE?
IT'S PICKING UP MORE MUD.
I JUST FIND INTERESTING
THAT THE MOP IS LEADING.
THERE IS A RIGHT WAY AND
A WRONG WAY TO DO THINGS.
THERE IS A PETE WAY
AND THERE'S A MARTI WAY.
I'M GONNA SHOW YOU AGAIN.
GIVE IT! NO!
ALL RIGHT, QUIT FLIRTING
AND GET SOME WORK DONE.
I'M NOT FLIRTING.
I'D RATHER FLIRT WITH YOU.
CAPTAIN, SIR.
SMOOTH, MOP BOY.
I GOTTA GO CHANGE.
WILL YOU DO ME A FAVOR?
WOULD YOU PUT THAT
SIGN IN THE OTHER ROOM?
SURE.
IT DOES LOOK A
LITTLE HEAVY FOR YOU.
[THUD] OWW!
ARE YOU OKAY?
YOU COULD'VE WARNED ME
THAT THE FLOOR WAS WET.
YEAH, YOU SEE...
ILLITERACY IS THE SILENT KILLER.
I THINK I HURT MY SHOULDER.
OWW!
DID I MENTION I
HURT MY SHOULDER?!
MEANING, PERHAPS, YOU
SHOULDN'T TOUCH IT?!
MAYBE I SHOULD GET
YOU TO A HOSPITAL.
NO, SOMEBODY HAS TO STAY HERE.
OUR CO-WORKERS AREN'T
GONNA INJURE THEMSELVES.
HEY, HOW'S IT GOING?
GREAT.
MAYBE SOMEDAY THEY'LL LET
ME CLEAN UP AT THE MAYO CLINIC
HANG IN THERE.
YOU'LL BE BACK ON
ROUNDS IN NO TIME.
AHA! TAKING GAUZE.
DO YOU HAVE A
REQUISITION FOR THAT?
NO, I HAVE A BLEEDING PATIENT.
CONVENIENT.
HEY, BERG.
YES, GERM?
WHEN YOU AND DR. WALKER
WERE GOING OUT,
DID YOU NOTICE ANYTHING
MISSING IN THE MORNINGS?
OFTEN MY DIGNITY AND
SENSE OF SELF-WORTH.
THIS ISN'T A GAME, MAN!
YOU THINK THIS IS A GAME?!
I AM SO GLAD I GOT HIM THIS JOB.
EXCUSE ME?
HI.
HI.
I'M... I'M... I'M... I'M DOC...
DOC... DOCTOR BERGEN...
DOCTOR... DOCTOR BERGEN...
DOCTOR MICHAEL LESLIE BERG...
PEOPLE CALL ME "BABBLE."
YEAH, WHAT IS THE
QUICKEST WAY OUT OF HERE?
FULL-BLOWN ANEURYSM.
SO, YOU'RE A DOCTOR?
I'M GUESSING YOU'RE PREPPING
THE COUNTER FOR SURGERY?
NO, NO, I JUST DO
THIS TO STAY HUMBLE.
IT KEEPS MY GOD COMPLEXIN CHECK.
WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE YOU'VE GOT
YOUR WORK CUT OUT FOR YOU.
LET'S SEE, YOU HURT YOUR ANKLE.
NO.
AH... SHOULDER!
LET'S SEE WHAT THEY'RE GIVING
YOU FOR THAT SHOULDER THERE.
OH, YEAH. YEAH,
JUST AS I SUSPECTED.
YOU SEE THAT?
THEY LEFT OUT
"DINNER AND A MOVIE."
YOU MEAN LIKE A DATE?
WELL, I'M FLATTERED.
OH, I DON'T KNOW.
I JUST MET YOU.
[Grunting] I JUST MET YOU
AND I DON'T SEEM TO CARE.
WHAT DO YOU SAY, YOU KNOW?
IT'LL BE FUN.
AH, WHAT THE HELL?
NO ONE ELSE IS ASKING ME OUT.
[LAUGHS] THAT'S THE WAY TO
BUILD A MAN'S SELF-ESTEEM.
SHE DIDN'T EVEN CALL.
SHE DIDN'T EVEN CALL TO
LET ME KNOW SHE WAS OKAY.
I'M NOT GONNA FEEL
GUILTY ABOUT IT ANYMORE.
SHE SLIPPED, SHE FELL, SO WHAT?
BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?
IF YOU CAN'T HANDLE A
LITTLE WATER ON THE FLOOR,
THEN MAYBE FIRE
FIGHTING ISN'T FOR YOU.
HEY, HOW DOES THIS LOOK?
LIKE THE SUIT YOU
WEAR ON EVERY DATE.
WELL, I'M NOT GONNA
WEAR MY BREAKUP SUIT.
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
OOH! THAT'S HER, THAT'S HER!
CAN YOU GET THAT?
I DON'T WANNA COME OFF ANXIOUS.
MARTI?
DWEEB?
YOU TWO KNOW EACH OTHER?
YEAH, THIS IS MARTI.
I WORK WITH HER.
REMEMBER, I WAS TELLING
YOU ABOUT THE GIRL
WHO HURT HER SHOULDER
AND WENT TO THE HOSPITAL
WHILE YOU WERE GETTING
READY FOR YOUR DATE
WITH THE GIRL YOU
MET AT THE HOSPITAL,
WHO I'M GUESSING
HURT HER SHOULDER.
I BET IF I WERE
PAYING ATTENTION,
I WOULD'VE PUT THAT TOGETHER.
HOW'S YOUR ARM? HOW'S YOUR ARM?
IT'S FINE... FINE.
LISTEN, COULD YOU WAIT
FOR ME DOWN ON THE STOOP?
I LIKE TO... YOU KNOW,
MAKE AN ENTRANCE.
YEAH, YEAH, SURE.
OKAY.
WHOA.
THIS IS WEIRDER THAN THAT NIGHT
WE BOTH RENTED "TANGO & CASH."
PETE, YOU KNOW, I
REALLY DIDN'T KNOW.
IS THIS GONNA BE A PROBLEM?
NO, NOT FOR ME. YOU'RE
GOING OUT WITH HER.
YEAH, BUT THIS IS FIREGIRL.
YOU'RE ALWAYS TALKING ABOUT HER.
I'M ALWAYS TALKING ABOUT
HER BECAUSE I CAN'T STAND HER.
GO, DON'T BE CRAZY.
HAVE A GOOD TIME.
LISTEN, I'M GONNA CANCEL.
I'M NOT A CHILD.
IF I WANTED TO GO OUT WITH
HER, I'D GO OUT WITH HER.
ARE YOU SURE?
YES, I'M SURE. NOW GO!
OKAY. ALL RIGHT.
OKAY. ALL RIGHT.
I CAN'T BELIEVE HE WENT.
WE'RE GOING TO NEED MORE
URINAL CAKES FOR THE MEN'S ROOM.
BUT, SIR, I JUST REPLACED
THEM THE OTHER DAY.
PETE, THESE MEN
ARE FIREFIGHTERS.
THEY SEE A URINAL
CAKE AS A CHALLENGE.
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.
I'LL GET RIGHT ON IT.
SORRY I'M LATE.
I TOLD YOU BEFORE,
"LATE" DOESN'T CUT IT HERE!
IS THAT WHAT YOU'LL TELL PEOPLE
WHO WATCHED THEIR HOUSE BURN?!
I THINK WHAT SHE MEANS
IS SORRY SHE'S LATE
FROM GETTING BACK
FROM THE STORE, WHERE I SENT
HER TO GET SOME PROVOLONE.
I LOVE PROVOLONE.
GOOD WORK, KID.
MAKE ME A SANDWICH, DUNVILLE.
I'D LOVE TO, SIR.
[DOOR CLOSES]
WELL, THAT WAS
SURPRISINGLY NICE OF YOU.
NEVER MIND THAT.
RUN ALONG AND GET
SOME PROVOLONE!
WELL, THANKS.
I DIDN'T HEAR MY ALARM GO OFF.
I WAS OUT KIND OF LATE..
LAST NIGHT, WHEN I WENT OUT...
YOU KNOW, FOR DINNER.
OH, RIGHT, RIGHT.
WAS THAT LAST NIGHT?
AREN'T YOU GONNA
ASK ME HOW IT WAS?
NO, I'VE HAD DINNER BEFORE.
I HAD A NICE TIME,
BUT IF THIS IS GONNA BE
A PROBLEM FOR YOU, I
TOTALLY UNDERSTAND.
WHY WOULD IT BE A PROBLEM?
HE DIDN'T USE MY CREDIT
CARD AGAIN, DID HE?
NO... BECAUSE, YOU KNOW,
HE'S YOUR ROOMMATE,
AND IT COULD BE AWKWARD
FOR, UH, YOU AND ME.
THERE IS NO "YOU AND ME."
THERE'S YOU, OVER THERE, AND
THERE'S ME, RIGHT HERE... WAY
TOTALLY SEPARATE.
WELL, THEN, IF IT'SNOT
BOTHER YOU... GONNA
GO OUT WITH HIM
AGAIN. SEE IF I CARE.
I THINK I WILL!
WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
I'M GONNA CALL HIM.
NEED HIS NUMBER?
I'VE GOT IT!
FINE. CALL HIM!
I CAN'T BELIEVE
SHE'S GONNA CALL HIM.
VERY NICE.
NOW BREATHE WITH YOUR PARTNER.
REMEMBER, GENTLEMEN,
THIS IS ALL ABOUT MOMMY NOW.
YOU DID THIS TO HER.
NOW HELP HER.
OH, VERY GOOD, YOU TWO...
EXCELLENT BREATHING.
NONSMOKER.
HEY, GUYS!
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
I THOUGHT YOU WERE
AT THE SOUP KITCHEN.
IT'S OKAY.
THEY THINK I'M GETTING CRACKERS.
OKAY, GENTLEMEN, LET MOMMY
KNOW YOU'RE THERE FOR HER.
GENTLY RUB YOUR PARTNER'S BACK.
[LAUGHS]
LIKE RUBBING'S GONNA HELP
WHEN YOU'RE TRYING
TO PASSA BASKETBALL.
VERY NICE, JOHNNY.
IT'S GREAT TO SEE SUCH
AN ATTENTIVE HUSBAND.
NO, NO, NO HE'S MINE.
HE'S NOT MINE,
BUT HE'S GONNA BE.
HE'S JUST GONNA HELP
SHAWN DELIVER THIS BABY,
AND THEN BEFORE YOU
KNOW IT, HE'S MINE AGAIN!
OKAY, BUT RIGHT NOW,
THIS IS A LAMAZE CLASS,
NOT A BOBSLED RUN.
SO I'D APPRECIATE IT
IF YOU WAIT OUTSIDE.
OH, THAT'S OKAY. I'M GOOD.
UM, HONEY, WE WON'T
BE MUCH LONGER.
WHY DON'T I MEET YOU AT HOME?
OH, OKAY.
BUT WHO ARE WE KIDDING?
YOU'RE ALL GETTING EPIDURALS.
OUT!
HEY, DR. WALKER, YOU
FINISHED WITH THAT SODA?
YES, I GUESS SO.WHY?
THREE WORDS... "D. N. A."
THERE ARE FINGERPRINTS
ALL OVER THIS CAN...
THAT WILL MATCH THE
ONES ON THAT CABINET!
WHICH CABINET? THAT CABINET?
THE CABINET I GET MEDICAL
SUPPLIES OUT OF EVERY DAY
AS PART OF MY JOB?
YEAH.
IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE
THAT I CAN HELP YOU WITH?
JUST ONE MORE THING I
CAN'T GET OUT OF MY HEAD.
THE LICE?
NO.
CAN YOU GET TO
THE POINT? I'M BUSY.
I THINK YOU DID IT. I
JUST NEED THE PROOF.
I DID IT.
REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY.
TOO BAD. I STILL
THINK YOU DID IT.
I TOOK YOUR STUPID ROLL
OF TOILET PAPER, OKAY?
I DIDN'T HAVE TIME
TO GO TO THE STORE,
SO I REACHED IN AND TOOK IT.
HERE IS $10.
GO AND BUY YOURSELF
50 ROLLS OF TOILET PAPER.
IT'S NOT ABOUT THE MONEY.
I'M JUST A LOWLY
ORDERLY IN YOUR EYES,
BUT I'M IN CHARGE
OF THAT CABINET.
AND BELIEVE IT OR NOT,
I TAKE A GREAT DEAL
OF PRIDE IN MY JOB.
AND I KNOW EVERYONE AROUND HERE
LOVES TO HAVE A GOOD
LAUGH AT THE GERM'S EXPENSE.
WHAT IF I WENT INTO SURGERY
AND JUST HELPED
MYSELF TO A KIDNEY
BECAUSE I DIDN'T HAVE TIME
TO STOP AT THE KIDNEY PLACE?
THAT WOULDN'T BE
VERY GOOD, WOULD IT?
NO.
NO, IT WOULDN'T, GERM.
I'M SORRY.
ALL RIGHT.
YOU WANT TO GO OUT WITH ME?
WELL, WELL, WELL.
LOOK WHO'S HOME FROM
PREGNANCY DATING SCHOOL.
SORRY, HONEY.
THEY ASKED SHAWN
AND METO STAY LATE.
THEY TOOK OUR
PICTURE FOR A POSTER.
OH, WELL, I'M NOT SURPRISED.
YOU TWO MAKE SUCH
A BEAUTIFUL COUPLE.
WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM?
YOU SAID IT WAS OKAY.
BECAUSE, JOHNNY, YOU
PUT ME ON THE SPOT.
YOU KNOW HOW YOU FEEL
WHEN YOU HELP THE HOMELESS.
I FEEL THAT WAY
WHEN I HELP SHAWN.
SEE, I DON'T WRAP MY LEGS
AROUND HOMELESS PEOPLE
AND RUB THEIR BACKS.
SHARON, SOMEONE NEEDED ME.
NO ONE'S NEEDED ME
AROUND HERE FOR A LONG TIME.
DON'T THINK THAT'S
GONE UNNOTICED.
BESIDES, YOU'RE TOO
BUSY SAVING THE WORLD
TO HAVE ANY TIME FOR ME.
IF IT'S NOT THE HOMELESS,
IT'S THE OLD FOLKS OR
THE SPOTTED OWL OR TUNA.
DOLPHINS.
WHAT?
DOLPHINS... NOBODY'S
TRYING TO SAVE THE TUNA!
WELL, WHATEVER IT
IS, IT COMES BEFORE ME.
THIS IS HEALTHY.
I GET A LITTLE BUSY, AND
YOU TRY TO PUNISH ME
WITH THE FIRST PREGNANT
TRAMP THAT WALKS TO THE DOOR?!
THAT'S WHAT IT TAKES
FOR YOU TO GIVE
ME THE TIME OF DAY!
FACE IT, SHARON, WE
ARE DRIFTING APART!
FRANKLY, I DON'T LIKE IT!
WELL, I DON'T LIKE
WAITING UP TO YELL AT YOU
AND THEN HAVING YOU
YELL AT ME, FRANKLY!
WELL, IT DOESN'T MATTER
BECAUSE I'M GOING TO BED!
SLEEP IN THE OTHER ROOM.
GOOD!
GOOD NIGHT!
[Singsong voice] CAN'T HEAR YOU!
I HAD A GREAT TIME TONIGHT.
YOU KNOW, I'VE NEVER
CAUGHTA PUCK BEFORE.
THANKS FOR LETTING ME KEEP IT.
YOU WERE THE ONE WHO KNOCKED
THE OLD LADY OUT OF THE WAY.
SO, YOU WANNA GRAB THAT DRINK?
YEAH, SURE... OH, WAIT.
PETE'S NOT IN THERE, IS HE?
NO, THEY WERE SHORT-HANDEDAT
THE FIRE STATION.
ONE OF THE VOLUNTEERS
HAD A HOT DATE.
YOU KNOW, I HAVE TO SAY,
I LOVE HOCKEY, YOU KNOW?
IT'S SO MANLY AND RUGGED.
DID YOU EVER PLAY?
NO... WELL, SORT OF.
I USED TO FIGURE SKATE
IN THE THIRD GRADE.
WHICH IS, UH, WHICH
IS LIKE HOCKEY,
EXCEPT YOUR DAD'S LESS PROUD.
YOU KNOW... I'M HAVING
A REALLY GOOD TIME.
WELL, THE NIGHT'S NOT OVER.
PAY NO ATTENTION TO ME.
PETE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
I FORGOT MY COAT.
IT'S 75 DEGREES OUT.
IT'S A LIGHT COAT.
MAYBE I LEFT IT IN THE BEDROOM,
BUT JUST PRETEND I'M NOT HERE.
UM... I'M SORRY ABOUT THAT.
NO, NO, IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT.
HE'S JUST ACTING LIKE AN IDIOT.
HE IS SUCH A BABOON.
THAT'S WHY WE NEVER
PHOTOGRAPH HIM FROM BEHIND.
I'M SORRY. LISTEN TO ME.
WHY DON'T WE DO WHAT HE
SAYS AND PRETEND HE'S NOT HERE?
GOOD LUCK.
OKAY, FOUND MY COAT, BUT NOW...
LOST MY KEYS
I THINK I DROPPED
THE MON THE FLOOR.
MOVE YOUR LEG.
AND AGAIN.
I'M NOT HERE.
THAT MAKES TWO OF US.
WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
I CAN'T DO THIS. I'M SORRY.
[GRUNTS]
THERE THEY ARE.
THEY'RE IN MY OTHER
POCKET. WHOOPS!
ALWAYS THE LAST PLACE
YOU LOOK. OFF I GO!
HEY, PETE!
IF YOU LIKED HER,
WHY DIDN'T YOU
JUST SAY SOMETHING
AND STOP WITH THE
CHILDISH GAMES?
I'M NOT PLAYING ANY GAMES.
IF YOU'RE SUPPOSED
TO BEAT THE FIREHOUSE,
THEN WHY DO YOU SUDDENLY
SHOW UP BACK HERE?
TO PRETEND TO GET MY
COAT AND RUIN YOUR DATE.
I KNEW IT.
FUNNY... YOU KNEW THAT,
BUT YOU DIDN'T KNOW THAT I
WANTED TO GO OUT WITH HER.
YOU TOLD ME TO GO OUT WITH HER.
YOU TOLD HER TO CALL ME.
WHERE IN THAT DO
I GET, "BACK OFF"?
SINCE WHEN DO I HAVE TO
SPELL THINGS OUT FOR YOU?
WHY SHOULD I HAVE TO GUESS?
WHEN I WANT
SOMETHING, I SAY I WANT IT.
IT'S LIKE WHEN YOU SAID
YOU DIDN'T WANT THAT
LAST DOUGHNUT, SO I ATE IT.
AND I WANTED THAT DOUGHNUT!
AND I WANTED THAT DOUGHNUT!
BUT YOU COULDN'T SAY IT!
YOU JUST LET IT SIT THERE
FOR A WEEK AND A HALF.
EVENTUALLY, SOMEONE
WAS GONNA EAT IT.
YEAH, YEAH, YOU KNOW WHO?
THE SLEAZEBALL WHO SHOVES
HIS BEST FRIEND TO THE SIDE!
NO, ACTUALLY, IT'S THE ONE
WHO'S MAN ENOUGH TO TAKE IT.
YOU KNEW I LIKED HER AND
YOU WENT AFTER HER ANYWAY!
YOU KNOW WHAT YOUR PROBLEM IS?
YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU WANT...
WHAT WOMAN, WHAT
JOB, WHAT NOTHING.
YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WANT,
BUT YOU'RE NEVER GONNA GET IT.
I'D LIKE A NEW ROOMMATE.
I WANT ONE, TOO.
FINE! I'M SLEEPING ON THE COUCH!
FINE![SLAMS DOOR]
WHICH IS JUST STUPID
BECAUSE I HAVE MY OWN ROOM!