Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place (1998–2001): Season 2, Episode 17 - Two Guys, a Girl and the Storm of the Century - full transcript
A big storm is heading towards Boston but Berg is more interested in women. A sighting of Ashley makes him turn towards the weather girl, Venita, on a local Spanish TV station. She is reporting from a local pier and Berg goes down there during the storm to meet her. They find refuge in a bait shop, worried about their survival. Sharon and Pete are determined to save them but Berg doesn't want to be rescued as he and Venita are going well together. Just after this, Ashley turns up wanting to reunite with Berg.
HEY, YOU GUYS, YOU
WATCHING THE NEWS?
THERE'S A HUGE STORM THAT'S
ABOUT TO HIT BOSTON. MOVE OVER.
WE KNOW.
Y AHORA, VAMOS AL REPORTAJE
DE LA TORMENTA DEL SIGLO.
IT'S A SPANISH STATION.
SI.
THE LATINS ARE THE CUTTING
EDGE OF WEATHER TECHNOLOGY.
I MEAN, WHO DO YOU
THINK INVENTED EL NIÑO?
DON'T TELL ME THEY
SUCKERED YOU BOTH.
THIS IS ALL A BUNCH OF HYPE.
THIS IS SO THE NEWS PEOPLE
CAN GET BETTER RATINGS
IT'S LIKE WAG THE DOG WITH RAI.
COULD YOU... COULD YOU JUST
PLEASE CHANGE THE STATION?
I SWEAR, SOMETIMES I HAVE
NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE THINKING.
BUENAS TARDES.
SOY VENITA VIENTO
CON EL PRONOSTICO
DEL TIEMPO EN BOSTON.
WELL, AT LEAST I KNOW
WHAT YOU'RE THINKING WITH.
SHE JUST MAKES ME CARE
ABOUT THE WEATHER AGAIN.
ESTA VA A SER LA
TORMENTA DEL SIGLO.
[BREATHES DEEPLY]
COME ON, BABY.
GIVE DADDY THE 5-DAY FORECAST.
OK, WE GOT TAPE FOR THE WINDOWS,
CANNED GOODS, EXTRA
BATTERIES. AM I MISSING ANYTHING?
UM... THE STORM.
IT'S NOON. IT'S GETTING DARK.
THERE'S A STORM
COMING. ACCEPT IT.
BELIEVE WHAT YOU WANT.
HOW DID WE LOSE BERG?
BERG, HURRY UP!
HEY, SHAR.
UM, LISTEN, UH... UH...
I WAS THINKING ABOUT
VALENTINE'S DAY.
YOU KNOW, WHEN YOU AND
JOHNNY GOT INTO THAT BIG FIGHT,
AND YOU BROKE UP, AND
WE HAD THOSE BEERS,
AND THEN WE... KISSED.
UM... DO YOU THINK IT'S
IMPORTANT FOR OUR FRIENDSHIP
THAT, YOU KNOW, AT SOME
POINT WE TAKE A MOMENT
AND JUST, YOU KNOW,
TALK IT THROUGH?
NO.
YEAH, ME NEITHER.
BERG, HURRY UP!
I'M SORRY.
IT'S THESE BOOTS.
THEY'RE TOO BIG.
BERG, THEY'RE NOT TOO BIG.
THEY'RE TOO DORKY.
I THINK I CAN PULL THESE OFF.
GOOD. PULL 'EM OFF AND
THROW 'EM IN THE TRASH.
CAN WE... CAN WE
STOP FOR A SECOND?
I HAVE FISHERMAN'S FOOT.
WHAT POSSESSED YOU TO
BUY THOSE BOOTS, ANYWAY?
WELL, THERE WAS A, UH,
TALL, BLOND SALESGIRL
WHO SLIPPED ME HER NUMBER.
I HAD TO BUY SOMETHING, AND
HIP BOOTS MADE ME LOOK CHUNKY.
SO DOES BOOT GIRL HAVE A NAME?
ASHLEY.
JEEZ! PETE, THAT IS NOT FUNNY
NO, SHARON, I MEAN
HERE COMES ASHLEY.
[GASP] OH, MY GOD!
SHE'S WITH JUSTIN!
COME ON.
Berg: WHAT ARE THEY DOING?
HOLDING HANDS.
HOLDING HANDS IN A HATEFUL WAY?
[ASHLEY LAUGHING]
COME ON.
YOU KNOW, IT SOUNDED TO ME
LIKE SHE WAS LAUGHING
AT HIM, NOT WITH HIM.
[THUNDER]
WE GOT A LOT OF THINGS TO
DO TO PREPARE FOR THE STORM.
WHY?
ASHLEY AND JUSTIN ARE
NEVER GONNA BREAK UP.
LOOK, I HATE TO SEE
YOU DO THIS TO YOURSELF.
YOU'RE THE GREATEST
GUY IN THE WORLD.
YOU ARE SO NEEDY! HEY!
LOOK... I KNOW IT'S
HARD TO LET GO.
I'M GOING THROUGH THE SAME
THING RIGHT NOW WITH JOHNNY.
EXCEPT PEOPLE ACTUALLY
WANT US TO GET BACK TOGETHER.
I WANT TO BE WITH ASHLEY.
FOR GOD'S SAKES,
MAN, SUCK IT UP!
SHE'S MOVED ON. I MEAN,
IT'S TIME YOU MOVED ON.
I WANT YOU TO CALL
BOOT GIRL RIGHT NOW.
I CAN'T. I THREW
AWAY HER NUMBER.
[CLEARS THROAT]
I SAW PETE PICK IT UP.
THANK YOU, LINDA TRIPP.
YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU MAY AS
WELL JUST KEEP IT, ALL RIGHT?
'CAUSE THAT GIRL IS NO
REPLACEMENT FOR ASHLEY.
THE MAN MAKES AN
EXCELLENT POINT.
I THINK IT'S TIME YOU
STOPPED BEING A COWARD.
YOU'RE NEVER GONNA
MEET SOMEBODY NEW
BY SITTING HERE ON THIS COUCH.
NOW, THAT'S WHERE YOU'RE WRONG.
IHOLA!
ISOY VENITA VIENTO!
ESTA TORMENTA...
OH, FOR GOD'S
SAKES, BERG, NOT HER!
YOU DON'T LIKE ANY
OF MY GIRLFRIENDS.
SHE'S NOT YOUR GIRLFRIEND!
IS THIS A 3 OR AN 8?
8.
THANKS.
YOU HAVE NOTHING IN
COMMON WITH THIS GIRL.
YOU DON'T EVEN SPEAK
THE SAME LANGUAGE.
I GOT 2 WORDS FOR YOU.
"RICKY" AND "LUCY."
OK, OK.
FALLING IN LOVE
WITH A GIRL ON TV
IS NOT PUTTING
YOURSELF OUT THERE.
YOU'RE JUST REPLACING ASHLEY,
A GIRL YOU COULDN'T HAVE,
WITH A GIRL YOU CAN'T GET.
SHE'S FANTASTICO.
PETE, PETE, HELP ME
TALK SOME SENSE INTO HIM.
ARE YOU CRAZY?
I'D LOVE TO MEET FOR DRINKS.
WAIT. WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
SOMEPLACE.
I'M NOT GONNA LET YOU GO OUT
IN THIS STORM TO THAT PIER.
NO. NO. BECAUSE I'M
NOT GOING TO THAT PIER.
I'M GOING UP TO YOUR APARTMENT
TO TAPE YOUR WINDOWS.
OK, THEN YOU DON'T
NEED THE RAINCOAT.
NO. I DON'T.
'CAUSE THIS'LL DO JUST FINE.
YEAH, I'VE GOT THE
PIER LOCKED DOWN!
EVERYTHING'S OK HERE.
HEY, HEY! WHAT ARE
YOU DOING HERE?
THIS AREA'S BEEN EVACUATED.
YEAH!
THERE WAS, LIKE, NO TRAFFIC!
THE WATERFRONT'S ONLY
OPEN TO PRESS AND TO POLICE.
I AM THE PRESS!
HEY, ARE YOU WITH
THAT CRAZY REPORTER
WHO'S STRAPPED
HERSELF TO THE PIER?
YEAH, YEAH! I'M HER MAKEUP MAN.
I SAW HER ON CAMERA,
AND SHE LOOKS REALLY SHINY.
WHAT'S WITH THE TRASH BAG?
I MUST STOP HER.
YEAH, WELL, TELL HER
TO GO PACK IT IN AND GO.
THIS STORM'S ONLY
GONNA GET WORSE.
OK!
WELL, YOU'RE ON YOUR OWN.
HEY, THAT'S ONE
DEDICATED MAKEUP MAN.
TRES, DOS, UNO... VENITA VIENTO,
TODAVIA REPORTANDO EN VIVO
DESDE BOSTON HARBOR.
¿COMO ESTAS, VENITA?
OHH!
ME LLAMO BERG.
WHOA. THE STORM HIT
WEST VIRGINIA YESTERDAY
WITH 100-MILE-AN-HOUR WINDS,
20 INCHES OF RAIN,
RIVERS OVERFLOWING...
OH, MY GOD! TORNADOES!
AUNTIE EM! AUNTIE EM!
IT SAYS SO RIGHT
HERE IN THE PAPER.
HERE. READ!
SHARON, I DON'T HAVE TO READ,
ALL RIGHT? IT'S ALL
A BUNCH OF HYPE.
IT'S ALL ABOUT BIG BUSINESS.
THE TV STATIONS GET BIGGER
RATINGS BY SCARING EVERYBODY,
AND THE UMBRELLA/SLASH/
CANDLE CARTELS
MAKE OUT LIKE BANDITS.
SHH!
THE WEATHER SATELLITES
ARE LISTENING TO OUR
CONVERSATIONS RIGHT NOW.
HEY, SHARON.
YEP?
UM... YOU KNOW, SINCE
WE'RE STUCK INSIDE,
AND, YOU KNOW, WE
HAVE SOME TIME ALONE,
I WAS THINKING WE
COULD, YOU KNOW...
SO IT'S NOT LINGERING IN
THE BACK OF OUR MINDS...
YOU KNOW... DISCUSS
CALMLY AND MATURELY
WHAT HAPPENED BETWEEN
US ON VALENTINE'S DAY.
NO.
YEAH, THAT'S A RELIEF.
GOOD.
OH, MY GOD.
IT'S BERG! WHAT THE HELL
IS HE DOING OUT THERE?
HEY, BERG'S ON TV.
HE'S GONNA GET HIMSELF KILLED.
NO, HE'S NOT, SHARON,
BECAUSE THERE IS NO STORM.
IT'S JUST A LITTLE RAIN.
VENITA!
I'M A BIG FAN!
WOULD YOU LIKE TO HAVE COFFEE?
YOU KNOW, CAFE CON LECHE.
ARE YOU NUTS?!
I'M ON THE AIR!
OHH!
YOU SPEAK ENGLISH!
YES!
SO LISTEN CAREFULLY!
GO AWAY!
TODAVIA, LO PEOR
ESTá POR LLEGAR...
SO, HOW ABOUT THIS WEATHER?
SURE IS, UH, RAINING
CATS AND DOGS.
YOU ARE AN IDIOT!
GOD, CAN YOU BELIEVE HIM?
I KNOW. HE HAS BETTER LINES THAN
"SO, HOW ABOUT THIS WEATHER?"
LISTEN TO ME!
THIS PLACE IS DANGEROUS!
SO, SAY HI TO YOUR MOM
AND GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!
IYA!
INO SOPORTO MAS!
INO VALE LA PENA MORIR POR ESTO!
IYO TENGO UNA VIDA!
IADIOS!
WHAT DID HE SAY?
HE SAID HE DOESN'T WANT TO DIE.
YOU BIG BABY!
DIE?! WHAT'S HE TALKING ABOUT?
IT'S JUST A LITTLE RAIN.
[COLOR BAR TONE]
UH-OH.
Venita: STOP PUSHING ME!
Berg: PUSH!
YOU ALMOST GOT US KILLED!
LOOK, IF I WASN'T
THERE TO CATCH YOU
WHEN YOUR SAFETY HARNESS BROKE,
YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN
THROWN INTO THE OCEAN.
MY SAFETY HARNESS
WOULDN'T HAVE BROKEN
IF YOU WEREN'T CLINGING
TO ME SCREAMING,
"WE'RE GONNA DIE!
WE'RE GONNA DIE!"
OH, SURE. YOU KNOW, YOU
CAN MAKE ANYTHING SOUND BAD
[IMITATING HER] IF
YOU SAY IT LIKE THAT!
HERE.
I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DRAGGED ME
INTO THIS DEATH TRAP.
"BOSTON BAIT & TACKLE."
SINCE 1943!
WE'LL BE SAFE HERE.
IMAGINE HOW MANY STORMS
THIS PLACE HAS WEATHERED.
READ THE LITTLE PRINT.
"REBUILT IN 1994."
[RUMBLING AND CREAKING]
OH, MY GOD!
THAT'S IT.
THAT'S IT. THE
PIER'S GIVING WAY.
WE'RE HISTORY.
NOW I'M NEVER GONNA BE A DOCTOR.
I'M NEVER GONNA SEE
PETE AND SHARON AGAIN.
AND THE WORST PART...
MY PARENTS... YEAH, THEY'RE GONNA
HAVE TO COME DOWN TO THE MORGUE
TO IDENTIFY MY BODY,
AND THEY'RE GONNA SEE
ME IN THESE YELLOW BOOTS.
DON'T WORRY.
THE SHARKS ARE
GONNA EAT YOU FIRST.
OK, YOU'RE NOT HERE.
ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?
NO!
NO, I'M NOT ALL RIGHT, OK?
YOU KNOW, YOU MAY GO THROUGH
THIS SORT OF THING ALL THE TIME,
BUT DON'T LET THE
BOOTS FOOL YOU... I DON'T!
I'M COLD.
AND I'M WET.
AND I'M... REALLY SCARED.
SO JUST EASE UP A BIT.
LOOK... I'M SORRY.
WE'RE GONNA BE OK.
[SNIFFLING]
REALLY?
REALLY.
[MOUTHING SILENTLY]
YO SOY JUAN DE LA ROS,
A CONTINUACION REPORTAJE
EN EQUIPO TOCANTE
LA TORMENTA DEL SIGLO.
AND WE'RE CLEAR!
HI, UH, ARE YOU JUAN DE LA ROSA?
YES. AND YOUR NAME IS?
I'M PETE, AND THIS
IS SHARON, AND WE...
PETE AND SHARON.
"TO MY FRIENDS" PETE AND SHARON.
BEST WISHES."
NO. NO, NO, NO.
WE'RE LOOKING FOR VENITA VIENTO.
OH, SURE. EVERYBODY
ALWAYS WANTS HER AUTOGRAPH.
SHE WAS WITH A
FRIEND OF OURS, OK?
AND THE LAST TIME WE SAW THEM,
SHE WAS HIT BY THIS HUGE
WAVE, AND THE CAMERA WENT OUT.
WELL, SHE'S NOT BACK YET,
AND I'VE HAD TO CARRY
THE WHOLE SHOW.
OH! OH!
HI. HI. PARDON ME.
CAN YOU TELL US IF VENITA
VIENTO HAS COME BACK YET?
NO. WE CALLED THE POLICE, BUT
PEOPLE WHO REFUSE TO EVACUATE
AREN'T A HUGE PRIORITY,
ESPECIALLY THE PRESS.
YEAH, BUT SHE'S WITH
A FRIEND OF OURS.
I'M SORRY. THERE'S
NOTHING WE CAN DO.
OH, WAIT A MINUTE.
HERE'S HER CAMERAMAN.
HEY, LARRY, WHERE'S VENITA?
I DON'T KNOW. SHE
INSISTED ON STAYING.
I HATE HER.
YOU KNOW, LAST WINTER SHE
MADE ME STAND ON A FROZEN POND
FOR 6 HOURS.
I LOST ALL FEELING IN
MY LEFT PINKY. LOOK.
I CAN'T ZOOM NO MORE. LOOK.
YOU LEFT HER ON THE PIER ALONE?
OF COURSE NOT.
I LEFT HER WITH SOME STALKER.
A STALKER?
HE'S NOT A STALKER.
HIS IS OUR BEST FRIEND.
HE JUST FELL IN LOVE
WITH HER ON THE TV,
AND HE WENT OUT IN THE STORM
TO TRACK HER DOWN SO
HE COULD ASK HER OUT.
OK, HE'S A LITTLE
BIT OF A STALKER.
WAIT, WAIT.
YOU CAN'T JUST
LEAVE THEM OUT THERE.
I'M SORRY.
10 SECONDS TO AIR!
THERE HAS TO BE A WAY
WE CAN GET TO THEM.
HOW? THERE'S ROAD
BLOCK SALL OVER THE PLACE.
THERE'S NO WAY WE'RE
GETTING THROUGH.
YOU KNOW WHAT?
THEY WON'T LET US THROUGH...
BUT THEY'LL LET
THE PRESS THROUGH.
OH! SO WE'RE GONNA
GO AFTER THEM?
SHARON, WE HAVE TO.
HE'S OUR BEST FRIEND.
ARE WE REALLY THAT CLOSE?
[THUNDER]
I FOUND A BLANKET IN THERE.
THANK YOU.
[PIER GROANING]
OH, GOD.
OH, WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?
WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING HERE?
[SHIVERING]
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
WELL, I... I WAS...
I WAS DATING THIS
GIRL ASHLEY, AND, UH...
YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR THIS.
[CREAKING]
OH, GOD.
NO, I DO. KEEP TALKING.
OK. OK.
WELL, UM, UM, WE...
I REALLY THOUGHT
WE'D END UP TOGETHER,
BUT, UH, SHE CHOSE SOME
OTHER GUY OVER ME, SO...
HOW LONG WERE YOU DATING HER?
OH...
WE NEVER ACTUALLY WENT OUT.
WHAT WOULD YOU
SAY IF A PERSON...
WENT OUT IN THE
MIDDLE OF A STORM
TO MEET A BEAUTIFUL GIRL...
A BEAUTIFUL GIRL...
WHO HE DOESN'T EVEN THINK
SPEAKS THE SAME LANGUAGE...
TO GET OVER A GIRL
WHO WANTS NOTHING
TO DO WITH HIM?
IS HE WEARING YELLOW BOOTS?
MAYBE.
SHARON WAS RIGHT.
YOU KNOW, I...
THE ONLY REASON I CAME DOWN HERE
WAS FOR THE SAME
REASONS I WANTED ASHLEY...
BECAUSE IT COULDN'T
POSSIBLY WORK OUT.
I RISKED MY LIFE FOR
ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.
[SHIVERING]
GOD.
COME HERE.
I DON'T KNOW.
I'M KIND OF SHY.
Sharon: AAH!
SHARON!
ARE YOU SURE THIS IS PIER 52?!
LET'S SEE IF I CAN
DECIP HER THIS CODE!
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT!
COME ON, STOP
HOGGING THE UMBRELLA!
NICE GOING!
THAT'S WHAT YOU GET
WHEN YOU DON'T SHARE!
OHH!
YOU KNOW, I'VE HAD MY
HEART BROKEN BEFORE.
REALLY?
IT MAKES YOU DO CRAZY THINGS.
WHAT'D YOU DO?
LET'S JUST SAY I'M NOT ALLOWED
BACK IN THE STATE OF TEXAS.
I DON'T MEAN TO SOUND WARPED,
BUT I FIND THAT REALLY EXCITING.
YOU KNOW...
YOU SEEM LIKE A REALLY NICE GUY.
I MEAN... MAYBE...
IF WE'D HAVE MET
UNDER DIFFERENT CIRCUMSTANCES...
ARE YOU SAYING
THAT IF WE SURVIVE,
YOU... YOU MIGHT...
CONSIDER GOING OUT WITH ME?
MAYBE.
[BOTH LAUGH]
YOU KNOW, THIS IS
ACTUALLY REALLY NICE.
I FEEL LIKE, UH...
I FEEL LIKE I'VE ROUNDED
A CORNER OR SOMETHING.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT?
WELL, IT'S KIND OF
A DIFFERENT STORY.
YOU KNOW, UH... BOY PURSUES GIRL
WHO HE THINKS IS
TOTALLY WRONG FOR HIM,
BUT SHE ACTUALLY
TURNS OUT TO BE RIGHT.
BOY DOESN'T RUN AWAY.
BECAUSE... BOY IS
TRAPPE IN SHACK
AT END OF PIER.
GIRL HAS POINT.
AAH!
HA HA HA HA!
HEY, PETE! WATCH
OUT FOR THAT WAVE!
STOP PLAYING WITH THE
SEAWEED. WE'VE GOTTA FIND BERG!
AAH!
SHARON!
WHAT?!
I HATE TO BRING THIS UP AGAIN...
BUT WE COULD BE HIT BY LIGHTNING
OR WASHED OVER THE
PIER AND DROWNED!
DON'T YOU THINK WE SHOULD
TAKE A MOMENT AND DISCUSS
WHAT HAPPENED BETWEEN US
ON VALENTINE'S DAY?!
NOOOOO!
JUST CHECKING!
WAIT A MINUTE! WAIT A MINUTE!
I THINK I SEE A LIGHT IN
THE SHACK OVER THERE!
I'M SERIOUS!
STOP PLAYING WITH THE SEAWEED!
I'M NOT!
OK, I GOT ONE MORE QUESTION.
WHAT?
ARE YOU SITTING WITH
ME UNDER THIS BLANKET
BECAUSE YOU LIKE
ME OR BECAUSE...
WE'RE GONNA DIE?
A LITTLE OF BOTH.
I CAN LIVE WITH THAT.
OH, THANK GOD!
YOU'RE BOTH ALIVE!
OH, GOD!
I CAN'T BELIEVE WE FOUND YOU.
YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT
WE'VE BEEN THROUGH.
THANK GOD!
GO AWAY.
WHAT? BUT...
BUT WE'RE... WE'RE...
WE'RE RESCUING YOU!
YEAH, I APPRECIATE IT,
BUT WE'RE KIND OF IN THE
MIDDLE OF SOMETHING HERE, GUYS.
OK, THAT'S IT.
THAT'S IT.
I AM DONE RISKING
MY LIFE FOR YOU.
COME ON.
HEY, YOU KNOW,
I THINK THE STORM'S LETTING UP.
AAH!
THANKS AGAIN, GUYS,
FOR COMING TO OUR RESCUE.
WHO KNEW IT WOULD
BE SUCH A BIG STORM?
WELL, I THINK YOU
WERE VERY LUCKY
THAT WAVE THREW YOU
BACK UP ON THE PIER.
MM-HMM. RIGHT ON
THAT NICE SOFT PYLON.
WELL, I... GUESS I'D
BETTER GET GOING.
SO, UH, I GUESS WE'RE STILL ON
FOR DINNER TOMORROW NIGHT?
YEAH. WHAT'S THE ATTIRE,
CASUAL OR SURVIVAL?
UH... GOOD NIGHT, VENITA.
GOOD NIGHT.
SEE YOU.
BYE.
AAH!
SHE'S GREAT.
NO. SHE'S AMAZING.
I GOTTA HAND IT TO YOU,
BERG. YOU DONE GOOD.
AND IF BY CHANCE YOU DECIDE
TO THROW OUT HER NUMBER...
EASY.
AND THE BEST THING IS
IS THAT SHE WANTS TO BE WITH ME
AND I WANT TO BE WITH HER,
AND WHAT'S THAT ALL ABOUT?
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
SHE'S SO OBSESSED WITH ME.
ASHLEY.
HI, BERG.
I DID IT.
I BROKE UP WITH JUSTIN.
WHAT?
WELL, DURING THE
STORM, I... I GOT SCARED,
AND I STARTED THINKING ABOUT WHAT
COULD HAPPEN AND HOW SHORT LIFE IS
AND WHO I WANTED
TO BE WITH, AND...
AND IT WASN'T
JUSTIN. IT WAS YOU!
OH, GOD, BERG.
I MISSED YOU.
BOY, WHEN IT RAINS, IT POURS.
[HORN BLOWS]
[HORN BLOWS!
WATCH OUT FOR THAT WAVE!
WHAT WAVE?!
[HORN BLOWS]
[HORN BLOWS]
[HORN BLOWS]
[HORN BLOWS]
WATCHING THE NEWS?
THERE'S A HUGE STORM THAT'S
ABOUT TO HIT BOSTON. MOVE OVER.
WE KNOW.
Y AHORA, VAMOS AL REPORTAJE
DE LA TORMENTA DEL SIGLO.
IT'S A SPANISH STATION.
SI.
THE LATINS ARE THE CUTTING
EDGE OF WEATHER TECHNOLOGY.
I MEAN, WHO DO YOU
THINK INVENTED EL NIÑO?
DON'T TELL ME THEY
SUCKERED YOU BOTH.
THIS IS ALL A BUNCH OF HYPE.
THIS IS SO THE NEWS PEOPLE
CAN GET BETTER RATINGS
IT'S LIKE WAG THE DOG WITH RAI.
COULD YOU... COULD YOU JUST
PLEASE CHANGE THE STATION?
I SWEAR, SOMETIMES I HAVE
NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE THINKING.
BUENAS TARDES.
SOY VENITA VIENTO
CON EL PRONOSTICO
DEL TIEMPO EN BOSTON.
WELL, AT LEAST I KNOW
WHAT YOU'RE THINKING WITH.
SHE JUST MAKES ME CARE
ABOUT THE WEATHER AGAIN.
ESTA VA A SER LA
TORMENTA DEL SIGLO.
[BREATHES DEEPLY]
COME ON, BABY.
GIVE DADDY THE 5-DAY FORECAST.
OK, WE GOT TAPE FOR THE WINDOWS,
CANNED GOODS, EXTRA
BATTERIES. AM I MISSING ANYTHING?
UM... THE STORM.
IT'S NOON. IT'S GETTING DARK.
THERE'S A STORM
COMING. ACCEPT IT.
BELIEVE WHAT YOU WANT.
HOW DID WE LOSE BERG?
BERG, HURRY UP!
HEY, SHAR.
UM, LISTEN, UH... UH...
I WAS THINKING ABOUT
VALENTINE'S DAY.
YOU KNOW, WHEN YOU AND
JOHNNY GOT INTO THAT BIG FIGHT,
AND YOU BROKE UP, AND
WE HAD THOSE BEERS,
AND THEN WE... KISSED.
UM... DO YOU THINK IT'S
IMPORTANT FOR OUR FRIENDSHIP
THAT, YOU KNOW, AT SOME
POINT WE TAKE A MOMENT
AND JUST, YOU KNOW,
TALK IT THROUGH?
NO.
YEAH, ME NEITHER.
BERG, HURRY UP!
I'M SORRY.
IT'S THESE BOOTS.
THEY'RE TOO BIG.
BERG, THEY'RE NOT TOO BIG.
THEY'RE TOO DORKY.
I THINK I CAN PULL THESE OFF.
GOOD. PULL 'EM OFF AND
THROW 'EM IN THE TRASH.
CAN WE... CAN WE
STOP FOR A SECOND?
I HAVE FISHERMAN'S FOOT.
WHAT POSSESSED YOU TO
BUY THOSE BOOTS, ANYWAY?
WELL, THERE WAS A, UH,
TALL, BLOND SALESGIRL
WHO SLIPPED ME HER NUMBER.
I HAD TO BUY SOMETHING, AND
HIP BOOTS MADE ME LOOK CHUNKY.
SO DOES BOOT GIRL HAVE A NAME?
ASHLEY.
JEEZ! PETE, THAT IS NOT FUNNY
NO, SHARON, I MEAN
HERE COMES ASHLEY.
[GASP] OH, MY GOD!
SHE'S WITH JUSTIN!
COME ON.
Berg: WHAT ARE THEY DOING?
HOLDING HANDS.
HOLDING HANDS IN A HATEFUL WAY?
[ASHLEY LAUGHING]
COME ON.
YOU KNOW, IT SOUNDED TO ME
LIKE SHE WAS LAUGHING
AT HIM, NOT WITH HIM.
[THUNDER]
WE GOT A LOT OF THINGS TO
DO TO PREPARE FOR THE STORM.
WHY?
ASHLEY AND JUSTIN ARE
NEVER GONNA BREAK UP.
LOOK, I HATE TO SEE
YOU DO THIS TO YOURSELF.
YOU'RE THE GREATEST
GUY IN THE WORLD.
YOU ARE SO NEEDY! HEY!
LOOK... I KNOW IT'S
HARD TO LET GO.
I'M GOING THROUGH THE SAME
THING RIGHT NOW WITH JOHNNY.
EXCEPT PEOPLE ACTUALLY
WANT US TO GET BACK TOGETHER.
I WANT TO BE WITH ASHLEY.
FOR GOD'S SAKES,
MAN, SUCK IT UP!
SHE'S MOVED ON. I MEAN,
IT'S TIME YOU MOVED ON.
I WANT YOU TO CALL
BOOT GIRL RIGHT NOW.
I CAN'T. I THREW
AWAY HER NUMBER.
[CLEARS THROAT]
I SAW PETE PICK IT UP.
THANK YOU, LINDA TRIPP.
YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU MAY AS
WELL JUST KEEP IT, ALL RIGHT?
'CAUSE THAT GIRL IS NO
REPLACEMENT FOR ASHLEY.
THE MAN MAKES AN
EXCELLENT POINT.
I THINK IT'S TIME YOU
STOPPED BEING A COWARD.
YOU'RE NEVER GONNA
MEET SOMEBODY NEW
BY SITTING HERE ON THIS COUCH.
NOW, THAT'S WHERE YOU'RE WRONG.
IHOLA!
ISOY VENITA VIENTO!
ESTA TORMENTA...
OH, FOR GOD'S
SAKES, BERG, NOT HER!
YOU DON'T LIKE ANY
OF MY GIRLFRIENDS.
SHE'S NOT YOUR GIRLFRIEND!
IS THIS A 3 OR AN 8?
8.
THANKS.
YOU HAVE NOTHING IN
COMMON WITH THIS GIRL.
YOU DON'T EVEN SPEAK
THE SAME LANGUAGE.
I GOT 2 WORDS FOR YOU.
"RICKY" AND "LUCY."
OK, OK.
FALLING IN LOVE
WITH A GIRL ON TV
IS NOT PUTTING
YOURSELF OUT THERE.
YOU'RE JUST REPLACING ASHLEY,
A GIRL YOU COULDN'T HAVE,
WITH A GIRL YOU CAN'T GET.
SHE'S FANTASTICO.
PETE, PETE, HELP ME
TALK SOME SENSE INTO HIM.
ARE YOU CRAZY?
I'D LOVE TO MEET FOR DRINKS.
WAIT. WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
SOMEPLACE.
I'M NOT GONNA LET YOU GO OUT
IN THIS STORM TO THAT PIER.
NO. NO. BECAUSE I'M
NOT GOING TO THAT PIER.
I'M GOING UP TO YOUR APARTMENT
TO TAPE YOUR WINDOWS.
OK, THEN YOU DON'T
NEED THE RAINCOAT.
NO. I DON'T.
'CAUSE THIS'LL DO JUST FINE.
YEAH, I'VE GOT THE
PIER LOCKED DOWN!
EVERYTHING'S OK HERE.
HEY, HEY! WHAT ARE
YOU DOING HERE?
THIS AREA'S BEEN EVACUATED.
YEAH!
THERE WAS, LIKE, NO TRAFFIC!
THE WATERFRONT'S ONLY
OPEN TO PRESS AND TO POLICE.
I AM THE PRESS!
HEY, ARE YOU WITH
THAT CRAZY REPORTER
WHO'S STRAPPED
HERSELF TO THE PIER?
YEAH, YEAH! I'M HER MAKEUP MAN.
I SAW HER ON CAMERA,
AND SHE LOOKS REALLY SHINY.
WHAT'S WITH THE TRASH BAG?
I MUST STOP HER.
YEAH, WELL, TELL HER
TO GO PACK IT IN AND GO.
THIS STORM'S ONLY
GONNA GET WORSE.
OK!
WELL, YOU'RE ON YOUR OWN.
HEY, THAT'S ONE
DEDICATED MAKEUP MAN.
TRES, DOS, UNO... VENITA VIENTO,
TODAVIA REPORTANDO EN VIVO
DESDE BOSTON HARBOR.
¿COMO ESTAS, VENITA?
OHH!
ME LLAMO BERG.
WHOA. THE STORM HIT
WEST VIRGINIA YESTERDAY
WITH 100-MILE-AN-HOUR WINDS,
20 INCHES OF RAIN,
RIVERS OVERFLOWING...
OH, MY GOD! TORNADOES!
AUNTIE EM! AUNTIE EM!
IT SAYS SO RIGHT
HERE IN THE PAPER.
HERE. READ!
SHARON, I DON'T HAVE TO READ,
ALL RIGHT? IT'S ALL
A BUNCH OF HYPE.
IT'S ALL ABOUT BIG BUSINESS.
THE TV STATIONS GET BIGGER
RATINGS BY SCARING EVERYBODY,
AND THE UMBRELLA/SLASH/
CANDLE CARTELS
MAKE OUT LIKE BANDITS.
SHH!
THE WEATHER SATELLITES
ARE LISTENING TO OUR
CONVERSATIONS RIGHT NOW.
HEY, SHARON.
YEP?
UM... YOU KNOW, SINCE
WE'RE STUCK INSIDE,
AND, YOU KNOW, WE
HAVE SOME TIME ALONE,
I WAS THINKING WE
COULD, YOU KNOW...
SO IT'S NOT LINGERING IN
THE BACK OF OUR MINDS...
YOU KNOW... DISCUSS
CALMLY AND MATURELY
WHAT HAPPENED BETWEEN
US ON VALENTINE'S DAY.
NO.
YEAH, THAT'S A RELIEF.
GOOD.
OH, MY GOD.
IT'S BERG! WHAT THE HELL
IS HE DOING OUT THERE?
HEY, BERG'S ON TV.
HE'S GONNA GET HIMSELF KILLED.
NO, HE'S NOT, SHARON,
BECAUSE THERE IS NO STORM.
IT'S JUST A LITTLE RAIN.
VENITA!
I'M A BIG FAN!
WOULD YOU LIKE TO HAVE COFFEE?
YOU KNOW, CAFE CON LECHE.
ARE YOU NUTS?!
I'M ON THE AIR!
OHH!
YOU SPEAK ENGLISH!
YES!
SO LISTEN CAREFULLY!
GO AWAY!
TODAVIA, LO PEOR
ESTá POR LLEGAR...
SO, HOW ABOUT THIS WEATHER?
SURE IS, UH, RAINING
CATS AND DOGS.
YOU ARE AN IDIOT!
GOD, CAN YOU BELIEVE HIM?
I KNOW. HE HAS BETTER LINES THAN
"SO, HOW ABOUT THIS WEATHER?"
LISTEN TO ME!
THIS PLACE IS DANGEROUS!
SO, SAY HI TO YOUR MOM
AND GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!
IYA!
INO SOPORTO MAS!
INO VALE LA PENA MORIR POR ESTO!
IYO TENGO UNA VIDA!
IADIOS!
WHAT DID HE SAY?
HE SAID HE DOESN'T WANT TO DIE.
YOU BIG BABY!
DIE?! WHAT'S HE TALKING ABOUT?
IT'S JUST A LITTLE RAIN.
[COLOR BAR TONE]
UH-OH.
Venita: STOP PUSHING ME!
Berg: PUSH!
YOU ALMOST GOT US KILLED!
LOOK, IF I WASN'T
THERE TO CATCH YOU
WHEN YOUR SAFETY HARNESS BROKE,
YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN
THROWN INTO THE OCEAN.
MY SAFETY HARNESS
WOULDN'T HAVE BROKEN
IF YOU WEREN'T CLINGING
TO ME SCREAMING,
"WE'RE GONNA DIE!
WE'RE GONNA DIE!"
OH, SURE. YOU KNOW, YOU
CAN MAKE ANYTHING SOUND BAD
[IMITATING HER] IF
YOU SAY IT LIKE THAT!
HERE.
I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DRAGGED ME
INTO THIS DEATH TRAP.
"BOSTON BAIT & TACKLE."
SINCE 1943!
WE'LL BE SAFE HERE.
IMAGINE HOW MANY STORMS
THIS PLACE HAS WEATHERED.
READ THE LITTLE PRINT.
"REBUILT IN 1994."
[RUMBLING AND CREAKING]
OH, MY GOD!
THAT'S IT.
THAT'S IT. THE
PIER'S GIVING WAY.
WE'RE HISTORY.
NOW I'M NEVER GONNA BE A DOCTOR.
I'M NEVER GONNA SEE
PETE AND SHARON AGAIN.
AND THE WORST PART...
MY PARENTS... YEAH, THEY'RE GONNA
HAVE TO COME DOWN TO THE MORGUE
TO IDENTIFY MY BODY,
AND THEY'RE GONNA SEE
ME IN THESE YELLOW BOOTS.
DON'T WORRY.
THE SHARKS ARE
GONNA EAT YOU FIRST.
OK, YOU'RE NOT HERE.
ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?
NO!
NO, I'M NOT ALL RIGHT, OK?
YOU KNOW, YOU MAY GO THROUGH
THIS SORT OF THING ALL THE TIME,
BUT DON'T LET THE
BOOTS FOOL YOU... I DON'T!
I'M COLD.
AND I'M WET.
AND I'M... REALLY SCARED.
SO JUST EASE UP A BIT.
LOOK... I'M SORRY.
WE'RE GONNA BE OK.
[SNIFFLING]
REALLY?
REALLY.
[MOUTHING SILENTLY]
YO SOY JUAN DE LA ROS,
A CONTINUACION REPORTAJE
EN EQUIPO TOCANTE
LA TORMENTA DEL SIGLO.
AND WE'RE CLEAR!
HI, UH, ARE YOU JUAN DE LA ROSA?
YES. AND YOUR NAME IS?
I'M PETE, AND THIS
IS SHARON, AND WE...
PETE AND SHARON.
"TO MY FRIENDS" PETE AND SHARON.
BEST WISHES."
NO. NO, NO, NO.
WE'RE LOOKING FOR VENITA VIENTO.
OH, SURE. EVERYBODY
ALWAYS WANTS HER AUTOGRAPH.
SHE WAS WITH A
FRIEND OF OURS, OK?
AND THE LAST TIME WE SAW THEM,
SHE WAS HIT BY THIS HUGE
WAVE, AND THE CAMERA WENT OUT.
WELL, SHE'S NOT BACK YET,
AND I'VE HAD TO CARRY
THE WHOLE SHOW.
OH! OH!
HI. HI. PARDON ME.
CAN YOU TELL US IF VENITA
VIENTO HAS COME BACK YET?
NO. WE CALLED THE POLICE, BUT
PEOPLE WHO REFUSE TO EVACUATE
AREN'T A HUGE PRIORITY,
ESPECIALLY THE PRESS.
YEAH, BUT SHE'S WITH
A FRIEND OF OURS.
I'M SORRY. THERE'S
NOTHING WE CAN DO.
OH, WAIT A MINUTE.
HERE'S HER CAMERAMAN.
HEY, LARRY, WHERE'S VENITA?
I DON'T KNOW. SHE
INSISTED ON STAYING.
I HATE HER.
YOU KNOW, LAST WINTER SHE
MADE ME STAND ON A FROZEN POND
FOR 6 HOURS.
I LOST ALL FEELING IN
MY LEFT PINKY. LOOK.
I CAN'T ZOOM NO MORE. LOOK.
YOU LEFT HER ON THE PIER ALONE?
OF COURSE NOT.
I LEFT HER WITH SOME STALKER.
A STALKER?
HE'S NOT A STALKER.
HIS IS OUR BEST FRIEND.
HE JUST FELL IN LOVE
WITH HER ON THE TV,
AND HE WENT OUT IN THE STORM
TO TRACK HER DOWN SO
HE COULD ASK HER OUT.
OK, HE'S A LITTLE
BIT OF A STALKER.
WAIT, WAIT.
YOU CAN'T JUST
LEAVE THEM OUT THERE.
I'M SORRY.
10 SECONDS TO AIR!
THERE HAS TO BE A WAY
WE CAN GET TO THEM.
HOW? THERE'S ROAD
BLOCK SALL OVER THE PLACE.
THERE'S NO WAY WE'RE
GETTING THROUGH.
YOU KNOW WHAT?
THEY WON'T LET US THROUGH...
BUT THEY'LL LET
THE PRESS THROUGH.
OH! SO WE'RE GONNA
GO AFTER THEM?
SHARON, WE HAVE TO.
HE'S OUR BEST FRIEND.
ARE WE REALLY THAT CLOSE?
[THUNDER]
I FOUND A BLANKET IN THERE.
THANK YOU.
[PIER GROANING]
OH, GOD.
OH, WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?
WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING HERE?
[SHIVERING]
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
WELL, I... I WAS...
I WAS DATING THIS
GIRL ASHLEY, AND, UH...
YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR THIS.
[CREAKING]
OH, GOD.
NO, I DO. KEEP TALKING.
OK. OK.
WELL, UM, UM, WE...
I REALLY THOUGHT
WE'D END UP TOGETHER,
BUT, UH, SHE CHOSE SOME
OTHER GUY OVER ME, SO...
HOW LONG WERE YOU DATING HER?
OH...
WE NEVER ACTUALLY WENT OUT.
WHAT WOULD YOU
SAY IF A PERSON...
WENT OUT IN THE
MIDDLE OF A STORM
TO MEET A BEAUTIFUL GIRL...
A BEAUTIFUL GIRL...
WHO HE DOESN'T EVEN THINK
SPEAKS THE SAME LANGUAGE...
TO GET OVER A GIRL
WHO WANTS NOTHING
TO DO WITH HIM?
IS HE WEARING YELLOW BOOTS?
MAYBE.
SHARON WAS RIGHT.
YOU KNOW, I...
THE ONLY REASON I CAME DOWN HERE
WAS FOR THE SAME
REASONS I WANTED ASHLEY...
BECAUSE IT COULDN'T
POSSIBLY WORK OUT.
I RISKED MY LIFE FOR
ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.
[SHIVERING]
GOD.
COME HERE.
I DON'T KNOW.
I'M KIND OF SHY.
Sharon: AAH!
SHARON!
ARE YOU SURE THIS IS PIER 52?!
LET'S SEE IF I CAN
DECIP HER THIS CODE!
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT!
COME ON, STOP
HOGGING THE UMBRELLA!
NICE GOING!
THAT'S WHAT YOU GET
WHEN YOU DON'T SHARE!
OHH!
YOU KNOW, I'VE HAD MY
HEART BROKEN BEFORE.
REALLY?
IT MAKES YOU DO CRAZY THINGS.
WHAT'D YOU DO?
LET'S JUST SAY I'M NOT ALLOWED
BACK IN THE STATE OF TEXAS.
I DON'T MEAN TO SOUND WARPED,
BUT I FIND THAT REALLY EXCITING.
YOU KNOW...
YOU SEEM LIKE A REALLY NICE GUY.
I MEAN... MAYBE...
IF WE'D HAVE MET
UNDER DIFFERENT CIRCUMSTANCES...
ARE YOU SAYING
THAT IF WE SURVIVE,
YOU... YOU MIGHT...
CONSIDER GOING OUT WITH ME?
MAYBE.
[BOTH LAUGH]
YOU KNOW, THIS IS
ACTUALLY REALLY NICE.
I FEEL LIKE, UH...
I FEEL LIKE I'VE ROUNDED
A CORNER OR SOMETHING.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT?
WELL, IT'S KIND OF
A DIFFERENT STORY.
YOU KNOW, UH... BOY PURSUES GIRL
WHO HE THINKS IS
TOTALLY WRONG FOR HIM,
BUT SHE ACTUALLY
TURNS OUT TO BE RIGHT.
BOY DOESN'T RUN AWAY.
BECAUSE... BOY IS
TRAPPE IN SHACK
AT END OF PIER.
GIRL HAS POINT.
AAH!
HA HA HA HA!
HEY, PETE! WATCH
OUT FOR THAT WAVE!
STOP PLAYING WITH THE
SEAWEED. WE'VE GOTTA FIND BERG!
AAH!
SHARON!
WHAT?!
I HATE TO BRING THIS UP AGAIN...
BUT WE COULD BE HIT BY LIGHTNING
OR WASHED OVER THE
PIER AND DROWNED!
DON'T YOU THINK WE SHOULD
TAKE A MOMENT AND DISCUSS
WHAT HAPPENED BETWEEN US
ON VALENTINE'S DAY?!
NOOOOO!
JUST CHECKING!
WAIT A MINUTE! WAIT A MINUTE!
I THINK I SEE A LIGHT IN
THE SHACK OVER THERE!
I'M SERIOUS!
STOP PLAYING WITH THE SEAWEED!
I'M NOT!
OK, I GOT ONE MORE QUESTION.
WHAT?
ARE YOU SITTING WITH
ME UNDER THIS BLANKET
BECAUSE YOU LIKE
ME OR BECAUSE...
WE'RE GONNA DIE?
A LITTLE OF BOTH.
I CAN LIVE WITH THAT.
OH, THANK GOD!
YOU'RE BOTH ALIVE!
OH, GOD!
I CAN'T BELIEVE WE FOUND YOU.
YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT
WE'VE BEEN THROUGH.
THANK GOD!
GO AWAY.
WHAT? BUT...
BUT WE'RE... WE'RE...
WE'RE RESCUING YOU!
YEAH, I APPRECIATE IT,
BUT WE'RE KIND OF IN THE
MIDDLE OF SOMETHING HERE, GUYS.
OK, THAT'S IT.
THAT'S IT.
I AM DONE RISKING
MY LIFE FOR YOU.
COME ON.
HEY, YOU KNOW,
I THINK THE STORM'S LETTING UP.
AAH!
THANKS AGAIN, GUYS,
FOR COMING TO OUR RESCUE.
WHO KNEW IT WOULD
BE SUCH A BIG STORM?
WELL, I THINK YOU
WERE VERY LUCKY
THAT WAVE THREW YOU
BACK UP ON THE PIER.
MM-HMM. RIGHT ON
THAT NICE SOFT PYLON.
WELL, I... GUESS I'D
BETTER GET GOING.
SO, UH, I GUESS WE'RE STILL ON
FOR DINNER TOMORROW NIGHT?
YEAH. WHAT'S THE ATTIRE,
CASUAL OR SURVIVAL?
UH... GOOD NIGHT, VENITA.
GOOD NIGHT.
SEE YOU.
BYE.
AAH!
SHE'S GREAT.
NO. SHE'S AMAZING.
I GOTTA HAND IT TO YOU,
BERG. YOU DONE GOOD.
AND IF BY CHANCE YOU DECIDE
TO THROW OUT HER NUMBER...
EASY.
AND THE BEST THING IS
IS THAT SHE WANTS TO BE WITH ME
AND I WANT TO BE WITH HER,
AND WHAT'S THAT ALL ABOUT?
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
SHE'S SO OBSESSED WITH ME.
ASHLEY.
HI, BERG.
I DID IT.
I BROKE UP WITH JUSTIN.
WHAT?
WELL, DURING THE
STORM, I... I GOT SCARED,
AND I STARTED THINKING ABOUT WHAT
COULD HAPPEN AND HOW SHORT LIFE IS
AND WHO I WANTED
TO BE WITH, AND...
AND IT WASN'T
JUSTIN. IT WAS YOU!
OH, GOD, BERG.
I MISSED YOU.
BOY, WHEN IT RAINS, IT POURS.
[HORN BLOWS]
[HORN BLOWS!
WATCH OUT FOR THAT WAVE!
WHAT WAVE?!
[HORN BLOWS]
[HORN BLOWS]
[HORN BLOWS]
[HORN BLOWS]