Timon & Pumbaa (1995–1999): Season 1, Episode 11 - Be More Pacific/Going Uruguay - full transcript
HAKUNA MATATA.
WHAT A WONDERFUL PHRASE.
HAKUNA MATATA!
♪ AIN'T NO PASSIN' CRAZE ♪
♪ IT MEANS NO WORRIES ♪
♪ FOR THE REST
OF YOUR DAYS ♪
♪ IT'S OUR
PROBLEM-FREE ♪
♪ PHILOSOPHY ♪
♪ HAKUNA MATATA ♪
YEAH!
(roaring)
HAKUNA MATATA,
TIMON AND PUMBAA,
HAKUNA MATATA!
♪ IT MEANS NO WORRIES ♪
♪ FOR THE REST
OF YOUR DAYS ♪
♪ IT'S OUR
PROBLEM-FREE ♪
♪ PHILOSOPHY ♪
♪ HAKUNA MATATA ♪
YOU KNOW, FOR ONCE
I WISH THAT HOG WOULD
BRING HOME THE BACON.
(snoring)
KNOWING PUMBAA, HE'S PROBABLY
ASLEEP UNDER A TREE, SNORING
UP A STORM AND...
GETTING HIS NECK MEASURED?
HMM. TWO POSSIBILITIES HERE.
POSSIBILITY ONE, PUMBAA'S
GETTING FITTED FOR A BOW-TIE
'CAUSE HE'S GETTING MARRIED,
OR TWO, PUMBAA'S GETTING
FITTED FOR A NOOSE 'CAUSE
HE'S GETTING HANGED!
(gasping)
-PUMBAA!
-WAIT! WHAT? WAIT! WHO? OH!
YOUR CRIMINAL PAST
HAS CAUGHT UP WITH YOU!
YOU GOTTA RUN OR
THEY'LL HANG YOUR
HIDE.
PUMBAA, NEXT TIME
TRY RUNNING AWAY!
DO YOU MIND?
MY NAME IS MR. BUTTONS.
I HAVE NO INTENTIONS
OF HANGING ANYONE'S
HIDE.
AND QUITE FRANKLY,
I RESENT THE ACCUSATION.
OH, YEAH?
WELL, BUTTONS,
RIDDLE ME THIS.
WHAT WERE YOU DOING
SIZING THIS HERE HOG
NECK FOR A NOOSE?
WELL, I WAS TAKING
MEASUREMENTS FOR HIS
TUXEDO AND BOW-TIE.
MR. PUMBAA IS NOT
GETTING EXECUTED,
HE'S GETTING MARRIED.
THERE'S A DIFFERENCE?
UH, NO OFFENSE,
BUT I DON'T WANNA
MARRY YOU.
OH, NOT ME!
I AM ONLY HERE TO MAKE
CERTAIN THIS WEDDING IS CARRIED
OUT IN STRICT ACCORDANCE
WITH THE REVERED WARTHOG
TRADITIONS AND BYLAWS
AS STIPULATED
IN THIS BOOK.
OH, SO YOU'RE
GETTING MARRIED?
AND WHEN WERE
YOU PLANNING TO TELL ME?
BUT I DIDN'T KNOW
I WAS GETTING MARRIED.
IT IS A PRE-ARRANGED
MARRIAGE, DECIDED
AND SET IN STONE
YEARS BEFORE
MR. PUMBAA
WAS EVEN BORN.
AND NOW, IT IS MY DUTY
AND DISTINCT PLEASURE
TO PRESENT MR. PUMBAA'S
BRIDE TO BE...
(mimicking fanfare)
COME OUT NOW,
MISS ROSEBUD.
IT'S ALL RIGHT.
ROSEBUD,
THIS IS MR. PUMBAA,
THE WARTHOG YOU'RE
GOING TO MARRY.
AND THAT'S
MR. PUMBAA'S FRIEND.
IT'S A...
(clears throat)
PLEASURE TO MEET...
ALL RIGHT NOW, YOU CAN GET
TO KNOW MR. PUMBAA LATER.
IT'S BEEN A LONG DAY
AND YOU NEED TO REST.
THE CEREMONY IS AT
12:00 NOON, TOMORROW.
DON'T YOU DARE BE
ONE SECOND LATE!
WE'LL BE THERE!
OH, YEAH, BYE-BYE.
LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.
WE CAN BE MILES AWAY
BY NOON TOMORROW.
GEE, TIMON, I DON'T KNOW
IF I SHOULD DEFY WARTHOG
TRADITIONS.
THEY'RE IMPORTANT
FOR THE CULTURAL
IDENTITY THAT CONNECTS
ONE GENERATION
OF WARTHOGS
TO THE NEXT.
OH, STOP IT, PUMBAA!
YOU'RE CREEPING ME OUT.
WELL, GETTING MARRIED
IS A TRADITION.
PUMBAA, FORGET
THE LOUSY TRADITION.
IF YOU GET MARRIED,
YOU WILL NEVER HUNT BUGS,
SING SONGS OR GO ON WACKY,
HIGH JINKS-FILLED ADVENTURES
WITH YOUR LOYAL AND DEVOTED
PAL, TIMON, EVER AGAIN!
GEE, I WOULDN'T LIKE THAT.
DON'T WORRY, PUMBAA.
I'LL FIND YOU A WAY OUT
OF THIS WEDDING.
FOR YOU BENEFIT,
AND FOR THE BENEFIT
OF ALL FREEDOM-LOVING,
ARMPIT-SCRATCHING,
BUG-EATING BROTHERS
EVERYWHERE!
HOW ARE YOU GOING
TO DO THAT, TIMON?
THERE'S ALWAYS
A LOOPHOLE, PUMBAA.
THE CHALLENGE IS KNOWING
WHERE TO FIND IT.
MAYBE IT'S IN MR. BUTTON'S
BIG BOOK OF WARTHOG
TRADITIONS AND BYLAWS.
SAVE YOUR STRENGTH, PUMBAA
AND LEAVE THE CHALLENGES
TO ME.
I MEAN, IT TAKES A SUPERIOR
INTELLECT LIKE MYSELF TO KNOW
THERE'S ONLY ONE PLACE
WE'LL FIND
THE AFOREMENTIONED
LOOPHOLE.
THERE, IN MR. BUTTON'S
BIG BOOK OF WARTHOG
TRADITIONS AND BYLAWS.
I'LL ASK IF WE CAN
BORROW IT.
PUMBAA, WHEN YOU GO
LOOKING FOR A LOOPHOLE,
YOU HAVE TO BE DECEITFUL
AND UNDERHANDED, OR ELSE
IT DOESN'T COUNT.
(snoring)
HOW ARE WE GOING TO
GET THAT BOOK WITHOUT
WAKING UP MR. BUTTONS?
WE'LL HAVE TO REPLACE IT
WITH A SIMILAR TYPE OBJECT,
OF EQUAL OR SAME SIZE.
I KNOW!
WE'LL USE YOUR COPY
OF THE WARTHOG TRADITIONS
AND BYLAWS.
"HOLIDAY HOG TRADITIONS,
SUMMER SWINE SOCIALS...
"JUNGLE TEA PARTIES,
HOOF CLAPPING."
HERE WE GO!
"WARTHOG WEDDINGS!"
"TRADITION ALLOWS THE GROOM
ABSOLUTELY NO SAY IN WHO
HE MARRIES, WHEN HE MARRIES
"OR WHETHER HE EVEN
WANTS TO MARRY."
"IT IS THE BRIDE'S SPECIAL DAY
AND THERE IS NO WAY YOU CAN
GET OUT OF IT, BUDDY."
WHOA!
PUMBAA, I FOUND IT!
I FOUND THE LOOPHOLE!
"IF THE BRIDE DECIDES,
WITH JUSTIFIABLE CAUSE
"THAT SHE CANNOT LOVE
HER DESIGNATED HUSBAND
"DUE TO ILL-MANNERED
BEHAVIOR,
"UNACCEPTABLE
PERSONAL APPEARANCE,
OR FOUL BODY ODOR,
"SHE CAN CALL
THE WEDDING OFF!"
WELL, THAT SETTLES IT.
IT DOES?
OKAY, PUMBAA, YOUR MOTIVATION
IS A COMPULSIVE DESIRE TO BE
ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING.
I WANT RUDE, I WANT CRUDE,
I WANT BAD MANNERS...GO!
(burping)
NO, NO, NO,
SORRY, PUMBAA.
I'M NOT FEELING
THE WRETCHEDNESS,
THE SQUALOR.
FROM THE TOP
AGAIN, PLEASE!
OH, BUT TIMON, THOSE
ARE THE WORST MANNERS
I'VE GOT!
THEY'RE AWFUL!
AWFUL IS NOT GOOD ENOUGH.
WE'RE GOING FOR ATROCIOUS!
TIMON, CAN I
COME OUT NOW?
ALL RIGHT,
COME ON OUT!
(sniffing)
KEEP SOAKING.
BUT TIMON, I'VE BEEN SOAKING
IN THIS SMELLY MUDHOLE EATING
STINKBUG BURRITOS FOR AN HOUR!
I SMELL TERRIBLE!
TERRIBLE WON'T
CUT IT, PUMBAA.
WE'RE GOING
FOR HORRENDOUS!
BUT IT'S ALMOST NOON AND
MR. BUTTONS WARNED US NOT
TO BE ONE SECOND LATE!
(grunting)
YOU ARE TWO HOURS LATE!
GO ON.
YEAH! WELL, THAT'S
THE KIND OF PIG I AM!
HE DON'T PLAY
BY THE RULES.
I'M MY OWN HOG
AND NOTHING'S GOING
TO CRAMP MY STYLE.
WHAT DO YOU THINK
OF THAT, SISTER?
WHAT IS THAT SMELL?
WHY, THAT'D BE ME!
WELL, NOW THEN,
SHALL WE BEGIN?
"DEARLY BELOVED,
WE ARE GATHERED HERE
TO WITNESS
"THE SACRED UNION
OF THESE TWO WARTHOGS
IN WEDDED MATRIMONY...
"IF ANYONE HAS REASON
TO BELIEVE THEY SHOULD
NOT BE MARRIED,
"SPEAK NOW
OR FOREVER
HOLD YOUR... "
(burping)
EXCUSE ME.
NO! THERE IS NO EXCUSE!
THE WARTHOG WEDDING
IS A TIME-HONORED TRADITION
AND YOU'VE MADE
A MOCKERY OF IT.
YOUR MANNERS ARE ATROCIOUS
-AND...
-AND HIS PERSONAL APPEARANCE?
REPULSIVE!
ATTABOY, PUMBAA!
THIS IS AN OUTRAGE!
WHAT CAN YOU DO?
THIS PREARRANGED WEDDING IS
PART OF A RESPECTED WARTHOG
TRADITION. I MEAN,
IT'S NOT LIKE THERE'S
SOME BIG LOOPHOLE
ON PAGE 346 OF THAT
BIG BOOK OF YOURS.
OH, BUT THERE IS!
THERE IS?
THE WEDDING CAN BE CALLED
OFF ENTIRELY IF THE BRIDE
DOESN'T LOVE THE GROOM.
AND HOW ON EARTH COULD ROSEBUD
LOVE THAT SLOPPY, SMELLY,
ILL-MANNERED PIG?
Rosebud:
WITH ALL MY HEART.
-WHO SAID THAT?
-I DID!
I AM THE BRIDE.
SHOULDN'T I DECIDE
IF I'M IN LOVE WITH
MR. PUMBAA OR NOT?
WELL, TECHNICALLY.
BUT THERE MUST BE
A WAY AROUND THAT!
OH, WELL, THERE'S
ALWAYS A LOOPHOLE...
BUT I'M CRAZY IN
LOVE WITH PUMBAA.
All: YOU ARE?
PUMBAA DOES EVERYTHING
I'VE NEVER BEEN ABLE TO DO.
DRESS WEIRD, TALK BACK,
SMELL BAD, AND LIVE WILD!
BUT THAT'S NOT ME!
EXCEPT FOR
THE SMELLING BAD PART.
I'M NOTHING BUT A FRAUD!
HE PUT THE PHONY IN BALONEY!
I'M NOT A WILD BIKER HOG!
I'M KIND, SINCERE
AND DOWN TO EARTH!
HE'S SENSITIVE AND CARING,
AND NOT AFRAID TO CRY.
I LIKE SMELLING THE FLOWERS,
CATCHING RAIN DROPS
ON MY TONGUE.
OH, WEDDING'S OFF.
IT IS?
I NEED ME A HOG WHO
LIVES ON THE EDGE.
THE WILDER, THE BETTER!
OH, SO NOW HE'S NOT
GOOD ENOUGH FOR YA,
HUH?
WELL, YOU'LL NEVER FIND
A HUSBAND THAT'S HALF
THE HOG THAT PUMBAA IS!
LOOK NO FURTHER, ROSEBUD!
I'M YOUR MAN!
RUGGED AND UNTAMED!
(burps) I BEG
YOUR PARDON.
I'M AN ANIMAL!
I STINK!
I LOVE...
RUN, PUMBAA!
WE MAY BE COWARDS,
BUT WE'RE FAST COWARDS.
RETENTION, RETREAT,
THESE ACTIONS ARE FUTILE
AGAINST I, CONGO QUINT,
THE BRAVEST, STRONGEST,
MOST ADVENTUROUS ADVENTURER
WEST OF THE GREAT RIFT VALLEY.
(scatting)
PPST, TIMON, I THINK
I'M WEARING DIAPERS.
SHUSH.
BUT I HAVEN'T WORN
DIAPERS SINCE I WAS
A WEE, LITTLE, TINY BABY.
WILL YOU SHUSH?
HEY, AND I'M WEARING
A DRESS, TOO!
-SHUSH!
-BUT I LOOK LIKE
A LITTLE GIRL!
PUMBAA, BE QUIET!
YOU WANT TO GET US CAUGHT?
HI, THERE.
ATTAINMENT, TROPHY,
WORTHY ACHIEVEMENT!
(groaning)
PUMBAA, THERE'S A
GORILLA IN OUR MIDST.
OH! OH!
WHAT PRECIOUS
LITTLE BABYKINS!
I HAVE ALWAYS WANTED MY OWN
LITTLE SUGAR PLUM DUMPLINGS
AND NOW I'VE GOT YOU,
I COULD DIE!
BIG HUG! BIG HUG!
LOVING YOU!
OH, YOU BUTTER CUP,
SWEETIE PIES! LOOK AT YOU.
LOOK AT YOU! OH!
YOU MUST BE SO TIRED
AND HUNGRY AND COLD.
FORGET ABOUT IT.
YOU JUST LIE DOWN.
I'LL FORAGE SOME BANANAS
THAT'LL PUT HAIR ON
YOUR LITTLE CHESTS AND
YOUR ARMS AND YOUR LEGS,
AND YOUR
LITTLE TOOTSIES,
LOOK AT YOU!
I CAN'T STAND IT!
AH! YOU'LL BE JUST
LIKE MOMMY!
UH, TIMON...
QUIET PUMBAA!
I'M TRYING TO FIGURE OUT
WHY THIS GORILLA
IS TREATING US
LIKE BABIES?
HEY...
PUMBAA!
THE REASON THIS GORILLA
IS TREATING US LIKE BABIES
IS BECAUSE SHE THINKS
WE'RE BABIES!
NO!
YES! AND THIS GIVES
ME A GREAT IDEA.
DON'T YOU SEE? DON'T YOU GET IT?
DON'T YOU REALIZE WHAT WE'VE GOT
HERE?
YEAH! WE'VE GOT ME
IN A DRESS!
PUMBAA, PUMBAA, PUMBAA!
WE HAVE GOT OURSELVES
AN 800 POUND GORILLA
BODYGUARD,
WHO IS GOING TO KEEP US,
HER LITTLE BUTTER CUP
SWEETIE PIES,
SAFE FROM TRIGGER
HAPPY BUNGALOW BILL
OUT THERE!
TIMON!
AH, DON'T GIVE ME
THE SHOCKED WARTHOG LOOK.
THIS IS PERFECT!
WE MAKE LIKE BABY APES
AND WE'RE SAFE
AS HOUSES!
IT'LL BE A PIECE OF,
YOU KNOW, LAYERS...
WITH FROSTING...
-CAKE?
-NO THANKS, I ALREADY ATE.
(laughing)
I ALREADY ATE!
THIS IS A TOUGH ROOM.
JUST RELAX.
THIS IS FOOL PROOF.
WHAT COULD
POSSIBLY GO WRONG?
(yelps)
CLUTCH THE PURSE,
MY GRACIOUS, FOR ME?
CORRECTIMO.
I, AN ABSOLUTELY
NORMAL APE,
HAVE ADORED YOU
FROM AFAR FOR COUNTLESS
YEARS AND NOW I HAVE COME
TO ASK FOR YOUR HAND,
IN MARRIAGE!
OH, MY!
THIS IS ALL SO SUDDEN,
I COULDN'T POSSIBLY...
LET ME FIX MY FACE,
WE'LL LEAVE IMMEDIATELY!
OH, WOULD YOU KEEP AN
EYE ON MY LITTLE BAMBINO
INFANT-TOTS
FOR A TEENIE-TINY MOMENT?
UH-OH! A RIVAL FOR
MOM'S AFFECTIONS.
MAKE LIKE A BABY.
(babbling)
(laughs) AT LAST!
CONGO QUINT HAS YOU!
MR. LUCKY, TA-DA!
OH! OH! OH!
I CAN'T STAND IT!
THIS IS SO SWEET!
LOOK AT THEIR
LITTLE PUNUMS.
THEY LIKE YOU, TOO.
AND I LIKE THEM.
BRAINSTORM!
HOW ABOUT I TAKE THE BABIES
FOR A LONG WALK?
JUST ME AND THEM,
WE'LL GET TO KNOW
EACH OTHER BETTER.
BIG APE TO LITTLE APE
AND APE-ETTE.
(exclaiming in shock)
(roaring)
SO, THAT BIG MISTER MAN THINKS
HE CAN MESS WITH MY LITTLE
BUTTONS, SWEETUMS, DOES HIMS?
(scoffing) WELL, I WON'T LET
ANYTHING GET MY LITTLE BABY
SPOTS. NO, NO, NO.
YOU'LL BE SAFE AND SOUND
RIGHT HERE, WHERE I CAN
PROTECT YOU.
SEE, WHAT'D I TELL 'YA?
I DON'T KNOW, TIMON.
I FEEL LIKE THE BIGGEST
LIAR IN THE WHOLE WORLD.
IT'S NOT NICE TO LIE.
NICE?
OH, EXCUSE ME, PUMBAA
OF SUNNYBROOK FARM.
YOU THINK THAT HUNTER
IS CONCERNED WITH "NICE"?
THE ONLY "NICE" THING
HE'S THINKING IS HOW
"NICE" WE'LL TASTE
WITH A SIDE OF COLESLAW
AND A ROOT BEER.
BESIDES, NICE GUYS
FINISH LAST.
(humming)
OOH, AND THERE'S
BIG SMILE.
OH, OH, PERFECT!
-(doorbell rings)
-AND JUST IN TIME!
I'VE GOT A SURPRISE
FOR MY PRECIOUS LITTLE
BABIES WHO LOVE ME!
AND MAMA LOVES THEM,
TOO, YES I DO!
-OH!
-TIMON...
I DON'T LIKE
THE LOOKS OF THIS.
PUMBAA, OBVIOUSLY THIS IS
SOME TYPE OF SPECIAL OCCASION.
OH, LOOK AT THOSE
LITTLE ANGELS!
THEY'RE SO CUTE!
OH, YOU LOOK UP "CUTE"
IN THE DICTIONARY,
THERE ARE THESE CHILDREN.
OH, THEY'RE THE CUTEST
BABIES IN THE ENTIRE
CARTOON.
WHAT'D I TELL 'YA?
NOW FOR THE SURPRISE.
ARE YOU READY?
ARE YOU READY?
COME PLAY...
WITH YOUR NEW FRIENDS! OH!
GO AHEAD, GO AHEAD.
YOU SHOULD PLAY NICE.
EXCUSE ME, I DON'T WANT
TO SOUND INHOSPITABLE
BUT I'VE GOT SOMETHING
TO CONFESS.
EXCUSE ME A MOMENT, MOM.
JUST A FEW PRIVATE WORDS
WITH MY SIBLING HERE.
PUMBAA, WHAT DO YOU
THINK YOU'RE DOING?
I CAN'T GO THROUGH
WITH IT, TIMON.
WE'RE NOT HER BABIES!
WHAT WE'RE DOING IS
DISHONEST AND IT'S GOING
TO GET US KILLED!
I'VE GOT TO TELL
HER THE TRUTH.
PUMBAA, OLD BUDDY, NO!
THE TRUTH IS A DANGEROUS,
DEADLY THING.
BELIEVE ME, SOMETIMES
IT'S BETTER TO TELL A LIE.
IN FACT, MOST TIMES
IT'S BETTER TO LIE.
WELL, THAT'S FOR
ME TO DECIDE!
AND I'VE DECIDED
TO TELL THE TRUTH.
(sighs) FINE,
GO TELL.
MISSUS GORILLA LADY...
UH, I...
YOU SEE, THE THING IS,
WE'RE NOT BABIES.
WE WERE JUST
ACTING LIKE BABIES.
THAT WAY WE COULD TAKE
ADVANTAGE OF YOUR
MATERNAL INSTINCTS
FOR OUR OWN PERSONAL
SAFETY AND COMFORT.
(roaring)
YOU SEE, TIMON, HONESTY
IS THE BEST POLICY.
(roaring)
(squealing)
(yelps)
AH-HA!
JUBILATION!
CONGO QUINT
HAS DONE IT!
THERE'S NO ONE
TO STOP ME THIS TIME.
(laughing evilly)
HAPPY, PUMBAA?
THIS IS WHAT YOU GET
FOR TELLING THE TRUTH.
(camera clicks)
CONGO QUINT
HAS DONE IT!
THE WORLD'S FIRST AND ONLY
PICTURE OF A WARTHOG
AND A MEERKAT TOGETHER.
CELEBRATIONAL!
THIS PHOTO IN MY NAME,
"CONGO QUINT",
WILL GRACE THE COVER
OF EVERY NEWSPAPER
IN THE WORLD.
CONGO QUINT IS THE BRAVEST,
STRONGEST, MOST RESOURCEFUL
PHOTOGRAPHER ON THIS
OR ANY OTHER CONTINENTAL
PLATE.
(groaning)
PUMBAA, I'VE JUST HAD
THE MOST REMARKABLE IDEA.
SMILE! GREAT!
WORK WITH ME!
♪ YUMMY, YUMMY, YUMMY,
I'VE GOT BUGS IN MY TUMMY ♪
♪ AND I FEEL LIKE
MUNCHING YOU ♪
♪ BUGS ARE SUCH A SWEET THING
GOOD ENOUGH TO EAT THING ♪
♪ THAT'S JUST WHAT
I'M GONNA DO ♪
♪ OOH, I LOVE TO HOLD YA ♪
♪ OOH, I LOVE TO KISS YA ♪
♪ OOH, I LOVE 'EM SO ♪
(vocalizing)
(burping)
♪ SWEETER, SWEETER THAN SUGAR ♪
♪ OH, BUGS,
I WON'T LET THEM GO ♪
(vocalizing)
♪ YUMMY, YUMMY, YUMMY,
I'VE GOT BUGS IN MY TUMMY ♪
♪ AND AS SICKENING
AS IT MAY SEEM ♪
♪ NUTRITION'S WHAT THEIR GIVIN'
IT'S WHAT KEEPS ME LIVIN' ♪
♪ AND THEY TASTE JUST
LIKE PEACHES AND CREAM ♪
♪ KINDA LIKE SUGAR ♪
♪ KINDA LIKE SPICES ♪
♪ KINDA LIKE... ♪
♪ BUT THEY DO ♪
♪ KINDA SOUNDS FUNNY ♪
♪ BUT LOVE, HONEY ♪
Both:
♪ HONEY I LOVE YOU ♪
(scatting)
♪ YUMMY, YUMMY, YUMMY,
I'VE GOT BUGS IN MY TUMMY ♪
♪ AND ONE MORE WILL SATISFY ♪
♪ LOVE, YOU'RE SUCH
A SWEET THING ♪
♪ GOOD ENOUGH TO EAT THING ♪
♪ SWEET THING
THAT AIN'T NO LIE ♪
♪ I LOVE TO HOLD YA,
LOVE TO KISS YA ♪
♪ OH, I LOVE YOU SO ♪
♪ NO ♪
♪ OH, LOVE IS SWEETER,
SWEETER THAN SUGAR ♪
♪ OH, LOVE, I WON'T LET... ♪
STINK BUG!
(screaming)
(shouting indistinctly)
WHAT A WONDERFUL PHRASE.
HAKUNA MATATA!
♪ AIN'T NO PASSIN' CRAZE ♪
♪ IT MEANS NO WORRIES ♪
♪ FOR THE REST
OF YOUR DAYS ♪
♪ IT'S OUR
PROBLEM-FREE ♪
♪ PHILOSOPHY ♪
♪ HAKUNA MATATA ♪
YEAH!
(roaring)
HAKUNA MATATA,
TIMON AND PUMBAA,
HAKUNA MATATA!
♪ IT MEANS NO WORRIES ♪
♪ FOR THE REST
OF YOUR DAYS ♪
♪ IT'S OUR
PROBLEM-FREE ♪
♪ PHILOSOPHY ♪
♪ HAKUNA MATATA ♪
YOU KNOW, FOR ONCE
I WISH THAT HOG WOULD
BRING HOME THE BACON.
(snoring)
KNOWING PUMBAA, HE'S PROBABLY
ASLEEP UNDER A TREE, SNORING
UP A STORM AND...
GETTING HIS NECK MEASURED?
HMM. TWO POSSIBILITIES HERE.
POSSIBILITY ONE, PUMBAA'S
GETTING FITTED FOR A BOW-TIE
'CAUSE HE'S GETTING MARRIED,
OR TWO, PUMBAA'S GETTING
FITTED FOR A NOOSE 'CAUSE
HE'S GETTING HANGED!
(gasping)
-PUMBAA!
-WAIT! WHAT? WAIT! WHO? OH!
YOUR CRIMINAL PAST
HAS CAUGHT UP WITH YOU!
YOU GOTTA RUN OR
THEY'LL HANG YOUR
HIDE.
PUMBAA, NEXT TIME
TRY RUNNING AWAY!
DO YOU MIND?
MY NAME IS MR. BUTTONS.
I HAVE NO INTENTIONS
OF HANGING ANYONE'S
HIDE.
AND QUITE FRANKLY,
I RESENT THE ACCUSATION.
OH, YEAH?
WELL, BUTTONS,
RIDDLE ME THIS.
WHAT WERE YOU DOING
SIZING THIS HERE HOG
NECK FOR A NOOSE?
WELL, I WAS TAKING
MEASUREMENTS FOR HIS
TUXEDO AND BOW-TIE.
MR. PUMBAA IS NOT
GETTING EXECUTED,
HE'S GETTING MARRIED.
THERE'S A DIFFERENCE?
UH, NO OFFENSE,
BUT I DON'T WANNA
MARRY YOU.
OH, NOT ME!
I AM ONLY HERE TO MAKE
CERTAIN THIS WEDDING IS CARRIED
OUT IN STRICT ACCORDANCE
WITH THE REVERED WARTHOG
TRADITIONS AND BYLAWS
AS STIPULATED
IN THIS BOOK.
OH, SO YOU'RE
GETTING MARRIED?
AND WHEN WERE
YOU PLANNING TO TELL ME?
BUT I DIDN'T KNOW
I WAS GETTING MARRIED.
IT IS A PRE-ARRANGED
MARRIAGE, DECIDED
AND SET IN STONE
YEARS BEFORE
MR. PUMBAA
WAS EVEN BORN.
AND NOW, IT IS MY DUTY
AND DISTINCT PLEASURE
TO PRESENT MR. PUMBAA'S
BRIDE TO BE...
(mimicking fanfare)
COME OUT NOW,
MISS ROSEBUD.
IT'S ALL RIGHT.
ROSEBUD,
THIS IS MR. PUMBAA,
THE WARTHOG YOU'RE
GOING TO MARRY.
AND THAT'S
MR. PUMBAA'S FRIEND.
IT'S A...
(clears throat)
PLEASURE TO MEET...
ALL RIGHT NOW, YOU CAN GET
TO KNOW MR. PUMBAA LATER.
IT'S BEEN A LONG DAY
AND YOU NEED TO REST.
THE CEREMONY IS AT
12:00 NOON, TOMORROW.
DON'T YOU DARE BE
ONE SECOND LATE!
WE'LL BE THERE!
OH, YEAH, BYE-BYE.
LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.
WE CAN BE MILES AWAY
BY NOON TOMORROW.
GEE, TIMON, I DON'T KNOW
IF I SHOULD DEFY WARTHOG
TRADITIONS.
THEY'RE IMPORTANT
FOR THE CULTURAL
IDENTITY THAT CONNECTS
ONE GENERATION
OF WARTHOGS
TO THE NEXT.
OH, STOP IT, PUMBAA!
YOU'RE CREEPING ME OUT.
WELL, GETTING MARRIED
IS A TRADITION.
PUMBAA, FORGET
THE LOUSY TRADITION.
IF YOU GET MARRIED,
YOU WILL NEVER HUNT BUGS,
SING SONGS OR GO ON WACKY,
HIGH JINKS-FILLED ADVENTURES
WITH YOUR LOYAL AND DEVOTED
PAL, TIMON, EVER AGAIN!
GEE, I WOULDN'T LIKE THAT.
DON'T WORRY, PUMBAA.
I'LL FIND YOU A WAY OUT
OF THIS WEDDING.
FOR YOU BENEFIT,
AND FOR THE BENEFIT
OF ALL FREEDOM-LOVING,
ARMPIT-SCRATCHING,
BUG-EATING BROTHERS
EVERYWHERE!
HOW ARE YOU GOING
TO DO THAT, TIMON?
THERE'S ALWAYS
A LOOPHOLE, PUMBAA.
THE CHALLENGE IS KNOWING
WHERE TO FIND IT.
MAYBE IT'S IN MR. BUTTON'S
BIG BOOK OF WARTHOG
TRADITIONS AND BYLAWS.
SAVE YOUR STRENGTH, PUMBAA
AND LEAVE THE CHALLENGES
TO ME.
I MEAN, IT TAKES A SUPERIOR
INTELLECT LIKE MYSELF TO KNOW
THERE'S ONLY ONE PLACE
WE'LL FIND
THE AFOREMENTIONED
LOOPHOLE.
THERE, IN MR. BUTTON'S
BIG BOOK OF WARTHOG
TRADITIONS AND BYLAWS.
I'LL ASK IF WE CAN
BORROW IT.
PUMBAA, WHEN YOU GO
LOOKING FOR A LOOPHOLE,
YOU HAVE TO BE DECEITFUL
AND UNDERHANDED, OR ELSE
IT DOESN'T COUNT.
(snoring)
HOW ARE WE GOING TO
GET THAT BOOK WITHOUT
WAKING UP MR. BUTTONS?
WE'LL HAVE TO REPLACE IT
WITH A SIMILAR TYPE OBJECT,
OF EQUAL OR SAME SIZE.
I KNOW!
WE'LL USE YOUR COPY
OF THE WARTHOG TRADITIONS
AND BYLAWS.
"HOLIDAY HOG TRADITIONS,
SUMMER SWINE SOCIALS...
"JUNGLE TEA PARTIES,
HOOF CLAPPING."
HERE WE GO!
"WARTHOG WEDDINGS!"
"TRADITION ALLOWS THE GROOM
ABSOLUTELY NO SAY IN WHO
HE MARRIES, WHEN HE MARRIES
"OR WHETHER HE EVEN
WANTS TO MARRY."
"IT IS THE BRIDE'S SPECIAL DAY
AND THERE IS NO WAY YOU CAN
GET OUT OF IT, BUDDY."
WHOA!
PUMBAA, I FOUND IT!
I FOUND THE LOOPHOLE!
"IF THE BRIDE DECIDES,
WITH JUSTIFIABLE CAUSE
"THAT SHE CANNOT LOVE
HER DESIGNATED HUSBAND
"DUE TO ILL-MANNERED
BEHAVIOR,
"UNACCEPTABLE
PERSONAL APPEARANCE,
OR FOUL BODY ODOR,
"SHE CAN CALL
THE WEDDING OFF!"
WELL, THAT SETTLES IT.
IT DOES?
OKAY, PUMBAA, YOUR MOTIVATION
IS A COMPULSIVE DESIRE TO BE
ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING.
I WANT RUDE, I WANT CRUDE,
I WANT BAD MANNERS...GO!
(burping)
NO, NO, NO,
SORRY, PUMBAA.
I'M NOT FEELING
THE WRETCHEDNESS,
THE SQUALOR.
FROM THE TOP
AGAIN, PLEASE!
OH, BUT TIMON, THOSE
ARE THE WORST MANNERS
I'VE GOT!
THEY'RE AWFUL!
AWFUL IS NOT GOOD ENOUGH.
WE'RE GOING FOR ATROCIOUS!
TIMON, CAN I
COME OUT NOW?
ALL RIGHT,
COME ON OUT!
(sniffing)
KEEP SOAKING.
BUT TIMON, I'VE BEEN SOAKING
IN THIS SMELLY MUDHOLE EATING
STINKBUG BURRITOS FOR AN HOUR!
I SMELL TERRIBLE!
TERRIBLE WON'T
CUT IT, PUMBAA.
WE'RE GOING
FOR HORRENDOUS!
BUT IT'S ALMOST NOON AND
MR. BUTTONS WARNED US NOT
TO BE ONE SECOND LATE!
(grunting)
YOU ARE TWO HOURS LATE!
GO ON.
YEAH! WELL, THAT'S
THE KIND OF PIG I AM!
HE DON'T PLAY
BY THE RULES.
I'M MY OWN HOG
AND NOTHING'S GOING
TO CRAMP MY STYLE.
WHAT DO YOU THINK
OF THAT, SISTER?
WHAT IS THAT SMELL?
WHY, THAT'D BE ME!
WELL, NOW THEN,
SHALL WE BEGIN?
"DEARLY BELOVED,
WE ARE GATHERED HERE
TO WITNESS
"THE SACRED UNION
OF THESE TWO WARTHOGS
IN WEDDED MATRIMONY...
"IF ANYONE HAS REASON
TO BELIEVE THEY SHOULD
NOT BE MARRIED,
"SPEAK NOW
OR FOREVER
HOLD YOUR... "
(burping)
EXCUSE ME.
NO! THERE IS NO EXCUSE!
THE WARTHOG WEDDING
IS A TIME-HONORED TRADITION
AND YOU'VE MADE
A MOCKERY OF IT.
YOUR MANNERS ARE ATROCIOUS
-AND...
-AND HIS PERSONAL APPEARANCE?
REPULSIVE!
ATTABOY, PUMBAA!
THIS IS AN OUTRAGE!
WHAT CAN YOU DO?
THIS PREARRANGED WEDDING IS
PART OF A RESPECTED WARTHOG
TRADITION. I MEAN,
IT'S NOT LIKE THERE'S
SOME BIG LOOPHOLE
ON PAGE 346 OF THAT
BIG BOOK OF YOURS.
OH, BUT THERE IS!
THERE IS?
THE WEDDING CAN BE CALLED
OFF ENTIRELY IF THE BRIDE
DOESN'T LOVE THE GROOM.
AND HOW ON EARTH COULD ROSEBUD
LOVE THAT SLOPPY, SMELLY,
ILL-MANNERED PIG?
Rosebud:
WITH ALL MY HEART.
-WHO SAID THAT?
-I DID!
I AM THE BRIDE.
SHOULDN'T I DECIDE
IF I'M IN LOVE WITH
MR. PUMBAA OR NOT?
WELL, TECHNICALLY.
BUT THERE MUST BE
A WAY AROUND THAT!
OH, WELL, THERE'S
ALWAYS A LOOPHOLE...
BUT I'M CRAZY IN
LOVE WITH PUMBAA.
All: YOU ARE?
PUMBAA DOES EVERYTHING
I'VE NEVER BEEN ABLE TO DO.
DRESS WEIRD, TALK BACK,
SMELL BAD, AND LIVE WILD!
BUT THAT'S NOT ME!
EXCEPT FOR
THE SMELLING BAD PART.
I'M NOTHING BUT A FRAUD!
HE PUT THE PHONY IN BALONEY!
I'M NOT A WILD BIKER HOG!
I'M KIND, SINCERE
AND DOWN TO EARTH!
HE'S SENSITIVE AND CARING,
AND NOT AFRAID TO CRY.
I LIKE SMELLING THE FLOWERS,
CATCHING RAIN DROPS
ON MY TONGUE.
OH, WEDDING'S OFF.
IT IS?
I NEED ME A HOG WHO
LIVES ON THE EDGE.
THE WILDER, THE BETTER!
OH, SO NOW HE'S NOT
GOOD ENOUGH FOR YA,
HUH?
WELL, YOU'LL NEVER FIND
A HUSBAND THAT'S HALF
THE HOG THAT PUMBAA IS!
LOOK NO FURTHER, ROSEBUD!
I'M YOUR MAN!
RUGGED AND UNTAMED!
(burps) I BEG
YOUR PARDON.
I'M AN ANIMAL!
I STINK!
I LOVE...
RUN, PUMBAA!
WE MAY BE COWARDS,
BUT WE'RE FAST COWARDS.
RETENTION, RETREAT,
THESE ACTIONS ARE FUTILE
AGAINST I, CONGO QUINT,
THE BRAVEST, STRONGEST,
MOST ADVENTUROUS ADVENTURER
WEST OF THE GREAT RIFT VALLEY.
(scatting)
PPST, TIMON, I THINK
I'M WEARING DIAPERS.
SHUSH.
BUT I HAVEN'T WORN
DIAPERS SINCE I WAS
A WEE, LITTLE, TINY BABY.
WILL YOU SHUSH?
HEY, AND I'M WEARING
A DRESS, TOO!
-SHUSH!
-BUT I LOOK LIKE
A LITTLE GIRL!
PUMBAA, BE QUIET!
YOU WANT TO GET US CAUGHT?
HI, THERE.
ATTAINMENT, TROPHY,
WORTHY ACHIEVEMENT!
(groaning)
PUMBAA, THERE'S A
GORILLA IN OUR MIDST.
OH! OH!
WHAT PRECIOUS
LITTLE BABYKINS!
I HAVE ALWAYS WANTED MY OWN
LITTLE SUGAR PLUM DUMPLINGS
AND NOW I'VE GOT YOU,
I COULD DIE!
BIG HUG! BIG HUG!
LOVING YOU!
OH, YOU BUTTER CUP,
SWEETIE PIES! LOOK AT YOU.
LOOK AT YOU! OH!
YOU MUST BE SO TIRED
AND HUNGRY AND COLD.
FORGET ABOUT IT.
YOU JUST LIE DOWN.
I'LL FORAGE SOME BANANAS
THAT'LL PUT HAIR ON
YOUR LITTLE CHESTS AND
YOUR ARMS AND YOUR LEGS,
AND YOUR
LITTLE TOOTSIES,
LOOK AT YOU!
I CAN'T STAND IT!
AH! YOU'LL BE JUST
LIKE MOMMY!
UH, TIMON...
QUIET PUMBAA!
I'M TRYING TO FIGURE OUT
WHY THIS GORILLA
IS TREATING US
LIKE BABIES?
HEY...
PUMBAA!
THE REASON THIS GORILLA
IS TREATING US LIKE BABIES
IS BECAUSE SHE THINKS
WE'RE BABIES!
NO!
YES! AND THIS GIVES
ME A GREAT IDEA.
DON'T YOU SEE? DON'T YOU GET IT?
DON'T YOU REALIZE WHAT WE'VE GOT
HERE?
YEAH! WE'VE GOT ME
IN A DRESS!
PUMBAA, PUMBAA, PUMBAA!
WE HAVE GOT OURSELVES
AN 800 POUND GORILLA
BODYGUARD,
WHO IS GOING TO KEEP US,
HER LITTLE BUTTER CUP
SWEETIE PIES,
SAFE FROM TRIGGER
HAPPY BUNGALOW BILL
OUT THERE!
TIMON!
AH, DON'T GIVE ME
THE SHOCKED WARTHOG LOOK.
THIS IS PERFECT!
WE MAKE LIKE BABY APES
AND WE'RE SAFE
AS HOUSES!
IT'LL BE A PIECE OF,
YOU KNOW, LAYERS...
WITH FROSTING...
-CAKE?
-NO THANKS, I ALREADY ATE.
(laughing)
I ALREADY ATE!
THIS IS A TOUGH ROOM.
JUST RELAX.
THIS IS FOOL PROOF.
WHAT COULD
POSSIBLY GO WRONG?
(yelps)
CLUTCH THE PURSE,
MY GRACIOUS, FOR ME?
CORRECTIMO.
I, AN ABSOLUTELY
NORMAL APE,
HAVE ADORED YOU
FROM AFAR FOR COUNTLESS
YEARS AND NOW I HAVE COME
TO ASK FOR YOUR HAND,
IN MARRIAGE!
OH, MY!
THIS IS ALL SO SUDDEN,
I COULDN'T POSSIBLY...
LET ME FIX MY FACE,
WE'LL LEAVE IMMEDIATELY!
OH, WOULD YOU KEEP AN
EYE ON MY LITTLE BAMBINO
INFANT-TOTS
FOR A TEENIE-TINY MOMENT?
UH-OH! A RIVAL FOR
MOM'S AFFECTIONS.
MAKE LIKE A BABY.
(babbling)
(laughs) AT LAST!
CONGO QUINT HAS YOU!
MR. LUCKY, TA-DA!
OH! OH! OH!
I CAN'T STAND IT!
THIS IS SO SWEET!
LOOK AT THEIR
LITTLE PUNUMS.
THEY LIKE YOU, TOO.
AND I LIKE THEM.
BRAINSTORM!
HOW ABOUT I TAKE THE BABIES
FOR A LONG WALK?
JUST ME AND THEM,
WE'LL GET TO KNOW
EACH OTHER BETTER.
BIG APE TO LITTLE APE
AND APE-ETTE.
(exclaiming in shock)
(roaring)
SO, THAT BIG MISTER MAN THINKS
HE CAN MESS WITH MY LITTLE
BUTTONS, SWEETUMS, DOES HIMS?
(scoffing) WELL, I WON'T LET
ANYTHING GET MY LITTLE BABY
SPOTS. NO, NO, NO.
YOU'LL BE SAFE AND SOUND
RIGHT HERE, WHERE I CAN
PROTECT YOU.
SEE, WHAT'D I TELL 'YA?
I DON'T KNOW, TIMON.
I FEEL LIKE THE BIGGEST
LIAR IN THE WHOLE WORLD.
IT'S NOT NICE TO LIE.
NICE?
OH, EXCUSE ME, PUMBAA
OF SUNNYBROOK FARM.
YOU THINK THAT HUNTER
IS CONCERNED WITH "NICE"?
THE ONLY "NICE" THING
HE'S THINKING IS HOW
"NICE" WE'LL TASTE
WITH A SIDE OF COLESLAW
AND A ROOT BEER.
BESIDES, NICE GUYS
FINISH LAST.
(humming)
OOH, AND THERE'S
BIG SMILE.
OH, OH, PERFECT!
-(doorbell rings)
-AND JUST IN TIME!
I'VE GOT A SURPRISE
FOR MY PRECIOUS LITTLE
BABIES WHO LOVE ME!
AND MAMA LOVES THEM,
TOO, YES I DO!
-OH!
-TIMON...
I DON'T LIKE
THE LOOKS OF THIS.
PUMBAA, OBVIOUSLY THIS IS
SOME TYPE OF SPECIAL OCCASION.
OH, LOOK AT THOSE
LITTLE ANGELS!
THEY'RE SO CUTE!
OH, YOU LOOK UP "CUTE"
IN THE DICTIONARY,
THERE ARE THESE CHILDREN.
OH, THEY'RE THE CUTEST
BABIES IN THE ENTIRE
CARTOON.
WHAT'D I TELL 'YA?
NOW FOR THE SURPRISE.
ARE YOU READY?
ARE YOU READY?
COME PLAY...
WITH YOUR NEW FRIENDS! OH!
GO AHEAD, GO AHEAD.
YOU SHOULD PLAY NICE.
EXCUSE ME, I DON'T WANT
TO SOUND INHOSPITABLE
BUT I'VE GOT SOMETHING
TO CONFESS.
EXCUSE ME A MOMENT, MOM.
JUST A FEW PRIVATE WORDS
WITH MY SIBLING HERE.
PUMBAA, WHAT DO YOU
THINK YOU'RE DOING?
I CAN'T GO THROUGH
WITH IT, TIMON.
WE'RE NOT HER BABIES!
WHAT WE'RE DOING IS
DISHONEST AND IT'S GOING
TO GET US KILLED!
I'VE GOT TO TELL
HER THE TRUTH.
PUMBAA, OLD BUDDY, NO!
THE TRUTH IS A DANGEROUS,
DEADLY THING.
BELIEVE ME, SOMETIMES
IT'S BETTER TO TELL A LIE.
IN FACT, MOST TIMES
IT'S BETTER TO LIE.
WELL, THAT'S FOR
ME TO DECIDE!
AND I'VE DECIDED
TO TELL THE TRUTH.
(sighs) FINE,
GO TELL.
MISSUS GORILLA LADY...
UH, I...
YOU SEE, THE THING IS,
WE'RE NOT BABIES.
WE WERE JUST
ACTING LIKE BABIES.
THAT WAY WE COULD TAKE
ADVANTAGE OF YOUR
MATERNAL INSTINCTS
FOR OUR OWN PERSONAL
SAFETY AND COMFORT.
(roaring)
YOU SEE, TIMON, HONESTY
IS THE BEST POLICY.
(roaring)
(squealing)
(yelps)
AH-HA!
JUBILATION!
CONGO QUINT
HAS DONE IT!
THERE'S NO ONE
TO STOP ME THIS TIME.
(laughing evilly)
HAPPY, PUMBAA?
THIS IS WHAT YOU GET
FOR TELLING THE TRUTH.
(camera clicks)
CONGO QUINT
HAS DONE IT!
THE WORLD'S FIRST AND ONLY
PICTURE OF A WARTHOG
AND A MEERKAT TOGETHER.
CELEBRATIONAL!
THIS PHOTO IN MY NAME,
"CONGO QUINT",
WILL GRACE THE COVER
OF EVERY NEWSPAPER
IN THE WORLD.
CONGO QUINT IS THE BRAVEST,
STRONGEST, MOST RESOURCEFUL
PHOTOGRAPHER ON THIS
OR ANY OTHER CONTINENTAL
PLATE.
(groaning)
PUMBAA, I'VE JUST HAD
THE MOST REMARKABLE IDEA.
SMILE! GREAT!
WORK WITH ME!
♪ YUMMY, YUMMY, YUMMY,
I'VE GOT BUGS IN MY TUMMY ♪
♪ AND I FEEL LIKE
MUNCHING YOU ♪
♪ BUGS ARE SUCH A SWEET THING
GOOD ENOUGH TO EAT THING ♪
♪ THAT'S JUST WHAT
I'M GONNA DO ♪
♪ OOH, I LOVE TO HOLD YA ♪
♪ OOH, I LOVE TO KISS YA ♪
♪ OOH, I LOVE 'EM SO ♪
(vocalizing)
(burping)
♪ SWEETER, SWEETER THAN SUGAR ♪
♪ OH, BUGS,
I WON'T LET THEM GO ♪
(vocalizing)
♪ YUMMY, YUMMY, YUMMY,
I'VE GOT BUGS IN MY TUMMY ♪
♪ AND AS SICKENING
AS IT MAY SEEM ♪
♪ NUTRITION'S WHAT THEIR GIVIN'
IT'S WHAT KEEPS ME LIVIN' ♪
♪ AND THEY TASTE JUST
LIKE PEACHES AND CREAM ♪
♪ KINDA LIKE SUGAR ♪
♪ KINDA LIKE SPICES ♪
♪ KINDA LIKE... ♪
♪ BUT THEY DO ♪
♪ KINDA SOUNDS FUNNY ♪
♪ BUT LOVE, HONEY ♪
Both:
♪ HONEY I LOVE YOU ♪
(scatting)
♪ YUMMY, YUMMY, YUMMY,
I'VE GOT BUGS IN MY TUMMY ♪
♪ AND ONE MORE WILL SATISFY ♪
♪ LOVE, YOU'RE SUCH
A SWEET THING ♪
♪ GOOD ENOUGH TO EAT THING ♪
♪ SWEET THING
THAT AIN'T NO LIE ♪
♪ I LOVE TO HOLD YA,
LOVE TO KISS YA ♪
♪ OH, I LOVE YOU SO ♪
♪ NO ♪
♪ OH, LOVE IS SWEETER,
SWEETER THAN SUGAR ♪
♪ OH, LOVE, I WON'T LET... ♪
STINK BUG!
(screaming)
(shouting indistinctly)