The Wild Wild West (1965–1969): Season 1, Episode 9 - The Night of the Double-Edged Knife - full transcript

There it is again, Artie. I
tell you, something's on fire.

It sure is.

I guess they named it
Brimstone for a good reason, huh?

Hey, Hannon. Two men comin'.

Must be the ones
Colecrest talked about.

Yeah, I better go tell Roach.

Quiet little town, isn't it?

There are your fires, Artie.

Why would Colecrest want
to meet us in a deserted town?

Did he mention anything
in his letter to you?

No.



Just that he wanted
us to meet him here

on a matter of the
greatest urgency.

Come to think of it, I
remember reading something

about a fire in Brimstone.

That was 10 years ago,

in the deserted mine
shafts under the town.

Do you suppose that those

could still be
smoldering all that time?

Sure would account for why
there's nobody around anymore.

Artie, would you want
to live in this town?

Let's find Colecrest.

A couple more good belts,
and he'll tell us everything.

Any more of your
brand of questioning

and Professor Colecrest
won't be able to tell us



anything at all.

Professor.

Professor, do you hear me?

Yes.

You've...

You've told us so much already.

Surely... Surely you
won't risk your life

just to save one
last, little secret.

No.

That's all I know.

You better start remembering
in the next 15 seconds,

'cause that's all
the time you got left.

Roach.

Roach, there are two
strangers ridin' into town.

Well, we haven't
had any visitors

for a very long time.

I wonder if they could
be those two federal men

that you were telling me about.

What were their names?

Oh, yes.

West and Gordon.

Don't get your
hopes up, Colecrest.

Two dead federal agents
won't do you much good.

No sign of anyone, Artie.

That place hasn't been
used for five years at least.

Maybe he never
made it into town at all.

Hello.

Hello, there.

Mr. Gordon, Mr. West.

I'm Mr. West. I'm Mr. Gordon.

I'm pleased to meet you.

I've been expecting you.
My name is Philip Colecrest.

Oh, that's, uh, Frank Roach.

He's been helping
me with my work.

Hi, Frank.

How do you do?

As a matter of fact,

that's why we're
here, Professor.

We got your letter saying
you needed our help

with some kind of find,

but you didn't mention
what the find was.

Well, I must say, gentlemen,

I'm terribly embarrassed
at your presence here.

Why so?

It seems my excitement
was a little premature.

You see, I thought I had
discovered a large vein of gold

in one of the deserted
mines around here.

Unfortunately, it
all turned out to be

nothing of any circumstance.

I did send you
a following letter

hoping to stop your
coming out here,

but apparently, it
must have arrived

after you'd already left.

Yes, I'm afraid it did.

Well, Jim, it looks like that
long ride was for nothin'.

Right, Artie. Well,
now that we're here, sir,

is there anything
we could do for you?

Oh, no, really. Thank you.

Everything is just fine.

I'm only sorry you had
to come all this way.

Well, then, professor, I
guess, uh, we'll be on our way.

Gentlemen.

Nice meeting you,
gentlemen. Mr. Roach.

I'll walk you to your horses.

Thank you.

I hope you believe
how sincerely sorry I am

about all of this.

By the way, when you get
back to Washington, D.C.,

I hope you'll give my
regards to Mrs. Colecrest.

By all means, professor.
It'd be our pleasure.

Be glad to.

The game's over, boys.

Hold it right there.

There is, unfortunately,
no Mrs. Colecrest.

But, of course, as
good federal officers,

you knew, didn't you?

You boys almost got
by with it, didn't you?

How sad for you that
there is no Mrs. Colecrest.

This is my department, Morton.

Roach.

Roach. The professor got away.

He fell down a mine shaft.

Surround that barn,
and don't let 'em get out.

How about that, Jim?

They're playin'
us out with music.

Bad music, but music.

I find no comfort
in that, Artie.

Artie.

Wow.

Listen, if the town is
built over the mine...

And the professor's in the mine.

Shall we?

No sense letting them
know where we've gone.

Right.

Cover me.

Ready, Jim.

Which one would
you like to take?

That one.

Why that one?

Why not that one, Artie?

Good. I didn't think
you had a reason.

Where are they?

Well, it would appear that
our birds have flown the coop.

Nobody just
disappears into thin air.

Hey, Mr. Roach. Over here.

Well, that's just great.

That means they got away.

And I got a feeling
they'll be comin' back,

with lots of law
right behind 'em.

On the contrary,

I doubt very strongly
that they would run off

knowing that we have
Colecrest in our hands,

which we, apparently,
no longer do.

How could you let a man in
that kind of shape get away?

Oh, now, Roach... What happened?

Look, Mr. Roach, he
didn't exactly get away.

You're contradicting
yourself, Hannon.

No, he-he was runnin', see,

and then he stepped
on these rotten timbers,

fell down into another tunnel.

Another level?

Was Colecrest hurt?

I don't know.

I don't know, he...

Look, he looked pretty bad.

He was bleedin', knocked out.

Another level.

Perhaps the day
is not lost after all.

Shall we go and rescue
the good professor?

This must be Colecrest.

Artie, we're gonna
have to move him.

They'll be back for him soon.

Yeah.

Can you handle
him? Yeah, I got him.

Thanks, Artie.

I wonder what Colecrest
could have found that was

important enough to bring
down a whole pack of guns.

Artie, you think he really
could have found gold?

Oh, no, I don't
think it was that.

Everything I've read about
the place... It's coal country.

The two never go together.

It's empty.

Yes, so it would seem.

Yeah, but he couldn't
move. He was hurt bad.

A puzzle, Mr. Roach.

If we are to trust
Mr. Hannon there,

how is it possible that a
man who was injured so badly

that he couldn't move,

has suddenly disappeared?

What are you getting at?

What I'm getting at is the fact

that if Colecrest was so
hurt that he couldn't move,

someone must have moved him.

The federal men.

Yes, that's my guess.

Somehow they got
down here ahead of us

and have carried the
good professor away.

Yeah, but where?

Since even they haven't had time

to get him back out of the mine,

I would obviously assume that
he's still down there someplace.

I suggest that you
get your men together,

institute a search,

and I think that we can,
uh, trust Mr. Hannon here

to guard this yawning cavity

and to keep anyone
from getting out.

Oh, sure you can.
I-I can do it, Roach.

You better.

Respiration's shallow,

pulse rapid and weak,

skin cold and clammy,

eyes out of focus.

I tell you, Jim, it's all
the classic symptoms

of a brain concussion.

If we don't get him to
a doctor soon, we're...

Artie, I remember
where there is a doctor.

Wait a minute... That
doctor's house we passed

on the way over here
through the cedar grove.

Right, and since we can't
take the patient to the doctor...

I'll bring the doctor
to the patient.

Come on.

See you, Artie.

Well?

Well, just in case, one of us
should stand watch outside.

Yeah, maybe somebody will
sneak up on us from behind.

Well, it won't take
brains in there,

just, um, muscle.

And guts.

Sir?

Lefty?

Come on. Let's go.

Let's get him.

West?

Gordon?

I know you're down here.

You don't have a chance.

I've got too many men for you.

Oh, uh, hello.

May I see the doctor please?

No.

No?

What do you mean, "no"? Why no?

Well, because doctors
are only human.

They get sick too.
That's why not.

Oh, come in.

Thank you.

I'm sorry, but my
father is a very sick man.

I just want to see him
for one moment. Please.

You look healthy enough.
What's your problem?

It's not for me. I've got a
friend some ways from here

who's been badly
hurt. No. No traveling.

He's got a fever,
medicine to take.

He can't be running
around the country.

Who is it, Dooley?

Dooley?

Father, you remember
your promise.

Oh, I do. I do.

But can't we at least
hear the man out

before we turn him away?

Thank you very much, doctor.
My name is Artemus Gordon.

I, uh... I'm sorry that
you're not feeling well,

but I've got a very
sick man back there.

My father is a very sick man.

Now, now, Dooley,
let's not exaggerate.

It's just a... Just a touch
of intestinal influenza.

That's all. It...

Well, it-it sounds
much worse than it is.

I'm not gonna let you go.

I'm sorry, sir,

but I did promise my daughter
that I wouldn't step foot

outside the house
until I was fit.

All right, sir. Thank
you very much.

Uh, is there any other
doctor around here

that I might be able to use?

The nearest one
is in Paradise City.

Paradise...

That's 28 miles farther on

and then all the way
back to Brimstone.

Oh, sir, this man's
been in a very bad fall.

He'll die before I can get
back there with somebody else.

A fall? Yes, sir.

That can present all
kinds of complications.

It already has.

He's in a coma.

Breathing shallow,
his eyes won't focus.

You're describing a concussion.

I'd better go. No.

Dooley, I am going.

I'll get my bag.

Thank you, doc... Oh, doctor?

Yes? Before you go,

there's one thing more
I think you should know.

There may be some
danger involved

in getting to the injured man.

I'm not saying there
will be, but it's possible.

Did you think that would matter?

Beautiful, wasn't she?

Yes.

Your mother?

Yes.

She was a wonderful woman.

Miss Sloane,

if it weren't critical, I would
never have pressed your father.

Believe me.

Well, I knew he was gonna go.

He always goes.

Would you have
him any different?

Well, I don't have
any choice, do I?

But it just doesn't seem fair.

He's sick, and tired.

He's tired.

But nobody every worries
about the doctor, do they?

I wonder why.

I don't know, maybe it just goes

with the diploma
and the black bag.

Father, you forgot your...

medicine.

Stand to, soldier.

Breakin' and enterin' government
stores depot in time of war,

as proscribed in
Army regulations,

summary execution.

Keep your rifle steady
on him, sergeant.

In the presence
of superior forces,

I surrender, captain.

Captain Lyman Butler, sir,

leader of the First
Virginia Cavalry,

now detached on an
assignment of highest importance.

Able-bodied young
man like you...

Why aren't you in uniform?

Oh, well, I, uh... I
was in uniform, sir.

Wounded, is that it?

Yes, sir, that was it.
I was, um, wounded.

Wounded and mustered out.

There's no
dishonor in that, boy.

Tell me, how's it
shapin' up at Five Forks?

Oh, you mean the
Battle of Five Forks?

There will be a
battle there, all right.

You mark my word.

You don't know how
it's gonna turn out?

How all this...

Armageddon will turn out?

No, sir, but I'd like to know
how it's gonna turn out.

There.

Right there at Five Forks.

That's where we're
gonna break the back

of Sheridan and his bluecoats.

And after that, the big one.

Pullin' all these reserves
out of Petersburg,

and out of Richmond.

The ol' Gray Fox is
gonna roll back Grant's line

in one mighty flanking maneuver,

and end this war
once and for all.

Right there.

I don't have my glasses, boy.

Where do my calculations
make that come out to?

It's in Virginia, sir, at a
place called Appomattox.

Appomattox.

You've served your
country, young man.

You know the sacrifices
men can be called on

to make in her name.

I'm gonna release you.

Can I trust you to
take a message?

Yes, sir. To, uh...? To whom?

To General Lee.

It's not for me. You
understand that?

It's for my men.

We've been here
such a long time.

I don't know the last time
the sergeant saw his family.

I know they miss him.

Tell General Lee that
his shipment is still intact.

Tell him Captain Lyman
Butler is still on guard.

He'll understand that
it's my men. It's my men.

They-they've been
here such a long time.

Yes, sir. Why don't you...? Why
don't you accompany me, sir?

This is my command.

I can't leave my men.

Look, you go, quickly.

Quickly.

I'm gonna have to leave
you for a few minutes, doc.

After I do, those men
at the front of the barn

will leave too.

When they do,

you'll go in through
the side door, quietly.

I think I'm beginning to
enjoy this, Mr. Gordon.

Fine. Try to keep it that way.

Well, what do you want?

N-nothing.

I was just tryin' to find
out what was happening.

Nothing is happening,
my dear Mr. Hannon.

We are merely sitting
here trying to figure out

a nice, safe way
to beard the lions

that await us below.

What does that mean?

It means... You poor clod.

That had you not been
run out of the caves,

we might be sitting here talking

to our old friend Colecrest,

at this very moment.

Well, I'll tell you
what I'm gonna do.

Next time, I'm gonna
let you go down there,

just to see what you can do.

As a last resort, I may have to.

Doc.

How did it go?

Artie, there have been
some strange things

happening around here.

So strange I doubt
if you'd believe them.

Well...

I think it's about time
we had a little talk

with the occupants of the mine.

Do you really think
your fancy talk's

gonna do any good?

Hey, hey, someone's comin'.

Can you tell me where
I can find Dr. Sloane?

He must have just arrived
with a-a Mr. Gordon.

They came to treat a
man who is unconscious.

Unconscious? That
means he hasn't been able

to tell them anything.

It also means they
found another way out.

Yes, but obviously, if they
had to bring a doctor in here,

Colecrest is too
injured to take out.

So? But, wh...? So.

If Colecrest should die before
he can tell them the secret,

all that means is that
we have to outwait them,

then we can go in
and find it ourselves.

Yeah, but they already
got that doctor to him.

Where? Don't worry.

I'll take care of the doctor.

You boys, tear this town apart.

Find the other way
out of that mine.

Now, wait a minute.
I don't understand.

Where's my father?
He needs his medicine.

Just come with me, my dear.

We'll take you to him.

Butler... Butler...

There was a Captain
Butler that headed up

a relief detachment
for General Lee,

but it wasn't armaments
he was carrying.

He's responding.

How soon before
he'll be able to talk?

Is there a doctor down there?

By the name of Sloane?

Because if there is,

there's someone up here
by the name of Dooley

who's exceedingly
anxious to see him.

Hold it.

Dooley's his daughter.

Doctor? Can you hear me?

You don't have much time, doc.

What do you want?

Ah, Mr. West.

How good to hear
your voice again.

In answer to your question,

we want the doctor up here.

And we want him right now.

What if he doesn't come up?

If you could see the expression

on Mr. Roach's face,

I don't think you'd
ask that question.

Doctor, I'll leave it up to you.

If you value Professor
Colecrest's life

more than you
value your daughter's,

stay down there.

I will give you
exactly five minutes

to come up out of the mine.

Otherwise...

Daddy. Oh.

Now, now, now, Dooley,

everything's all right.

Don't give me away.
Just follow my lead.

Ah, Dr. Sloane.

This West-Gordon pair

are really quite
something, aren't they?

Right under my very nose,

they smuggle you in to
treat their precious patient.

I know nothing about that.

I'm a doctor, I go
where I'm needed.

How very noble of you.

How is your patient?

He's not at all well.

A linear fracture of the skull.

All the morbid trauma
typical of parietal concussion...

Never mind that.

Will he live?

If I'd had an opportunity
to operate, perhaps,

but since you
interrupted me, no.

Excellent.

You see, Dr. Sloane,

Professor Colecrest
has some information

that I want very badly.

Now, if he dies, I can
search it out for myself.

But it is important

that I have that information,

and no one else.

If he dies, you die,

and your very
charming daughter dies.

And, uh,

very shortly too.

They're all yours.

How long have you
had Hanson's jaundice?

W-what?

It's none of my business.

You probably have
a doctor of your own.

Have the night palpitations
and the sweating started yet?

The deep, sharp pain won't
come until later, of course.

Jaundice? I? Yes.

You must be out of your mind.

Well, perhaps I am,

but I've been an
experienced enough doctor

to know a very serious
illness when I see one.

I-I-I feel fine.

I've never felt
better in my life.

Great Dane, that is
the worst possible sign.

W-what do you mean?

The patient never knows
when he has jaundice. Never.

That's what makes it so deadly.

He hasn't intelligence enough
to recognize the symptoms.

Symptoms?

What...? Wha-what symptoms?

Do you know that the whites
of your eyes have started...

Well, it's none of my business.

W-what else? What else, doctor?

Here, I've got a mirror.
You can see for yourself.

Hold it right there, doc.

You don't have a
gun in there, do you?

No.

Maybe I'd better
look for myself.

Lock that guy upstairs.

Artie, you fight pretty
good for an old doctor.

No, it wasn't just arms
that Butler was carrying

when his detachment was
bushwhacked by the raiders.

Then Morton was
one of his raiders.

That's right, and
he's been searching

for Butler's hiding
place ever since.

But why, Professor Colecrest?

I stumbled upon the why

shortly before Morton and
his men finally showed up.

If you will slip that
map aside, please.

It opens up. Thank you.

It's a king's ransom.

Yes, raised in
a last-ditch effort

to save the Confederacy.

And only someone as
highly placed as Morton

could have found out
about the gold and silver

raised by the Confederacy,
and that Butler's detachment

was carrying it to
Jefferson Davis.

Somehow Morton and
his men missed this.

Yes.

The bushwhacking
was brilliant, deadly.

And yet Butler, badly wounded,

with a couple of his
men, managed to escape.

And with the treasure to boot.

Is it any wonder that he's mad?

Hiding out here...

The sergeant, his only
companion, finally dying,

and leaving Butler alone
in these caves all this time.

Morton never stopped searching

for the money that
slipped through his fingers.

And poor, half-mad Butler
never stopped dreaming

that one day, officially,

he would be relieved
of this crushing burden.

Stand to, the lot of you.

Breakin' and enterin' government
stores depot in time of war,

as proscribed and set
forth by Army regulation...

Captain Butler.

General Lee.

In the name of the
Army of Northern Virginia,

and the Confederate
States of America,

I hereby accept transfer

of your supplies.

And with it,

relief of your assignment

and a special
commendation, captain,

to be entered upon your record.

For selfless devotion to duty,

for notable skill
in the execution

of a difficult and
perilous mission,

and above all,

for an unflagging courage,

that never once faltered.

Well done, captain.

Hey, Artie.

I just left Professor Colecrest,

and he tells me
that Captain Butler

is comin' along real well.

That's good.
What is this, Artie?

- Some kind of war game?
- No, no, no.

I got to thinking about that map

that Butler kept and the
plan he had for the big battle.

So? Well, it occurred to me

that if the Confederates had
broken through at Five Forks...

Right?

And if Grant had pulled

the reserves out of Richmond,

and then they had managed to
outflank Grant at Petersburg...

Artie.

He was very mixed up.

Yeah, but if the
South had been able

to implement his plan,

we could have all
been whistling "Dixie."