The Twilight Zone (1959–1964): Season 5, Episode 29 - The Jeopardy Room - full transcript
After spending twelve years in a Soviet prison, Major Ivan Kuchenko has fled his homeland and is now in transit in a third country hoping to soon leave and seek asylum in the USA. He is not alone however as Comissar Vassiloff, his torturer during his imprisonment, has caught up with him. Vassilof could easily kill him - he has an assassin with him, Boris - but he decides to give him a chance to walk away. He's placed a bomb in Kuchenko's room and he give the Major 3 hours to find and disarm it. Kuchenko proves himself to be a worthy adversary.
YOU UNLOCK THIS DOOR
WITH THE KEY OF IMAGINATION.
BEYOND IT IS
ANOTHER DIMENSION...
A DIMENSION OF SOUND,
A DIMENSION OF SIGHT,
A DIMENSION OF MIND.
YOU'RE MOVING INTO A LAND OF
BOTH SHADOW AND SUBSTANCE,
OF THINGS AND IDEAS.
YOU'VE JUST CROSSED
OVER INTO THE TWILIGHT ZONE.
YES?
Man: Is this Major Kuchenko?
WHO IS CALLING?
This is Major
Kuchenko, isn't it?
WHO IS CALLING?
Major, you don't know me,
but I've heard of your
recent arrival here,
and I wanted you to
know that you have friends.
WHO IS THIS SPEAKING?
IS THIS A FRIEND ALSO?
Yes... a good friend, Major.
Not known to you yet, perhaps,
but soon to become acquainted.
May I impose upon you
to remain in your room...
AND WHY?
WHY DO I HAVE TO
STAY IN MY ROOM?
WE'LL BE MAKING CONTACT
WITH YOU VERY SOON, MAJOR.
YOUR WELL BEING IS
OUR DEEP CONCERN.
NOW, KOMMISSAR?
MAJOR, MAY I COUNT ON
YOU TO SHOW GOOD SENSE?
FOR YOUR OWN SAFETY,
REMAIN IN YOUR ROOM.
YOU'LL BE SEEING YOUR
FRIENDS BEFORE LONG.
GOOD-BYE.
NOW, KOMMISSAR.
THE FOX IS IN THE TRAP.
I COULD MAKE HIS
HEAD LEAVE HIS BODY
FROM THIS DISTANCE.
THAT WOULD GIVE YOU
PLEASURE, WOULDN'T IT?
A GREAT DEAL OF
PLEASURE, KOMMISSAR.
TELL ME WHEN.
EVEN WHEN HE LIES DOWN, I
CAN STILL AIM FOR HIS HEAD.
YES, I BELIEVE IT, BORIS.
I KNOW OF YOUR PROWESS.
OH, PUT THAT GUN AWAY FOR A BIT.
PUT IT AWAY?
OH, LAY IT ASIDE.
WHAT, ARE WE NOT
GOING TO KILL HIM?
THE IMPATIENCE OF THE BOURGEOIS.
THEY DO NOT SIP WINE.
THEY GULP IT DOWN
LIKE A SOFT DRINK.
THEY DO NOT CARESS
WOMEN; THEY DEVOUR THEM.
THEY DO NOT SNIFF AT THE
ESSENCE OF A RARE PERFUME.
NO... THEY TRY TO JAM
IT INTO THEIR NOSTRILS.
BORIS, THE GENTLEMAN
WILL DIE. INDEED, HE WILL.
BUT I WANT HIM TO
DIE WITH FINESSE,
WITH SUBTLETY AND A
DEGREE OF THOUGHT.
THAT IS A GOOD DEATH.
I DID NOT KNOW THERE
WAS A GOOD DEATH
AND A BAD DEATH.
UH-HUH.
A GOOD DEATH IS
THE DEATH OF ART.
A BAD ONE IS THE
DEATH OF A BUTCHER.
YOU, BORIS, ARE A BUTCHER.
I AM AN ARTIST.
YOU WILL HAVE YOUR
DEATH TONIGHT, BORIS,
WITHIN A FEW HOURS,
BUT WE WILL HAVE
KILLED WITH ARTISTRY
AND NOT WITH A MEAT CLEAVER
OR AN EXPLOSIVE BULLET
OR ANY OTHER OF
THE BUTCHER'S TOOLS.
NO, NO.
THIS DEATH WILL
BE LIKE A BALLET.
A CAT AND A MOUSE.
THIS IS THE LATTER...
THE INTENDED VICTIM...
WHO MAY OR MAY NOT
KNOW THAT HE IS TO DIE,
BE IT BY BUTCHERY OR BALLET.
HIS NAME IS MAJOR IVAN KUCHENKO.
HE HAS, IF EVENTS GO
ACCORDING TO CERTAIN PLANS,
PERHAPS THREE OR FOUR
MORE HOURS OF LIVING.
BUT AN IGNORANCE SHARED BY
BOTH HIMSELF AND HIS EXECUTIONER
IS OF THE FACT THAT BOTH OF
THEM HAVE TAKEN A FIRST STEP
INTO THE TWILIGHT ZONE.
YES?
Kommissar: MAJOR KUCHENKO?
WHO IS IT?
A FRIEND.
DON'T WORRY.
TURN OFF THE LIGHTS
IF YOU WANT TO,
FIND A HIDING PLACE.
I'LL COME IN WITH MY HANDS UP.
I'VE GOT MY PALMS OPEN.
MAJOR KUCHENKO?
AND YOU ARE...?
A FRIEND.
MAY I COME IN?
THANK YOU.
YOU ARE THE ONE
I SPOKE TO ON THE TELEPHONE?
MM-HMM.
WE HAD A BRIEF CHAT EARLIER.
WELL, IT'S QUITE A
PLACE YOU HAVE HERE.
WHO OCCUPIED IT BEFORE YOU?
A RAT?
I HAD NO LUXURY OF CHOICES.
NO, INDEED, YOU HAVE NOT.
IN THAT RESPECT, YOU ARE
A VERY POOR MAN, MAJOR.
BUT, THEN AGAIN, YOU HAVE A BED,
PICTURES ON THE WALL,
A CARPET... SUCH AS IT IS.
WELL, QUITE AN ADEQUATE
ACCOMMODATION.
AH... AND A MOST WONDERFUL VIEW
OF A BRICK BUILDING ALONGSIDE.
WELL, MAJOR, THERE
ARE WORSE PLACES
TO SPEND AN EVENING IN.
I KNOW.
I HAVE BEEN TO MANY OF THEM.
INDEED. INDEED, YOU HAVE.
SIBERIA IS QUITE COLD, ISN'T IT?
I'VE BEEN TOLD IT HAS A
MOST UNFORTUNATE CLIMATE.
YOU HAVE BEEN TOLD RIGHT.
IT IS A FREEZING JUNGLE.
A FREEZING JUNGLE.
OH, THAT'S MARVELOUS...
LOVELY IMAGERY.
SIBERIA AS A FREEZING JUNGLE.
YOU MAKE REFERENCE,
OF COURSE, TO THE PEOPLE.
I MAKE REFERENCE TO SOME PEOPLE.
OH...
IT MUST HAVE BEEN
UNPLEASANT FOR YOU.
SUFFICIENTLY UNPLEASANT
TO MOTIVATE YOU
TO RENOUNCE YOUR NATIVE COUNTRY
AND TO TRY AND SEEK
ASYLUM ELSEWHERE,
WHICH BRINGS US UP TO DATE.
YOU WERE A POLITICAL PRISONER.
YOU ESCAPED.
YOU SERVED A TERM OF 12 YEARS,
AND NOW YOU ARRIVED
HERE IN A NEUTRAL COUNTRY,
AND YOU ARE DESPERATELY
TRYING TO GET AN AIRCRAFT
TO TAKE YOU OUT OF
HERE TO A WESTERN NATION.
BUT, UH... YOU FEEL YOU
ARE UNDER SURVEILLANCE?
I KNOW I AM UNDER SURVEILLANCE.
WELL, DO YOU KNOW BY WHOM?
VERY WELL.
WELL, TELL ME. WHO ARE THEY?
LOOK IN THE MIRROR, KOMMISSAR.
DISCERNING, MAJOR.
YOU REMEMBER FACES.
I REMEMBER PAIN.
I REMEMBER SOME INTERROGATIONS
THAT WENT ON FOR MANY MONTHS.
I REMEMBER ONE PARTICULAR MAN
WHO SMOKED A LONG
CIGARETTE IN A HOLDER,
STOOD IN A CORNER,
NODDING AND SMILING
WHILE I WENT FROM
AGONY TO AGONY.
SO, MAJOR...
MAY WE DISPENSE
WITH THE AMENITIES,
THE MASQUERADES,
THE LITTLE GIVE AND TAKE
BETWEEN TWO STRANGERS
FEELING EACH OTHER OUT?
NOW WE GET TO THE POINT.
DID YOU HONESTLY THINK
WE WOULD PERMIT YOU
TO BOOK PASSAGE ON
AN AIRCRAFT OUT OF HERE?
IMPOSSIBLE.
AS A FORMER MEMBER
OF THE MILITARY
EVEN AS FAR BACK
AS 12 YEARS AGO,
YOU POSSESS INFORMATION
THAT WE WOULD FIND...
EMBARRASSING TO HAVE
RELEASED ELSEWHERE.
SO IT'S NOT REALLY TO OUR
ADVANTAGE THAT YOU LEAVE HERE.
OF COURSE, IT WOULD BE
SIMPLER AND MORE CONVENIENT
TO ACCOMPANY ME
BACK TO OUR EMBASSY.
I AM SICK... TIRED AND TORN,
KOMMISSAR, BUT I AM NOT INSANE.
I WOULD SOONER CUT MY WRISTS
OVER A SINK AND BLEED TO DEATH!
NO, MAJOR.
I AM AFRAID WE ARE OF TWO
MINDS ABOUT THAT KIND OF DEATH.
GENTLY, GENTLY, MAJOR.
HERE.
I BROUGHT SOME AMONTILLADO...
QUITE RARE AND MOST
PLEASING TO THE PALATE.
I'M AFRAID I WILL HAVE TO REPEAT
WHAT I SAID BEFORE,
KOMMISSAR: I AM NOT INSANE.
I'M QUITE AWARE OF
WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO ME
IF I WERE TO DRINK ANY OF THAT.
WITH YOUR INDULGENCE, MAJOR,
IF YOU ASSUME THIS TO CONTAIN
CYANIDE OR SOME OTHER POISON,
YOU'RE QUITE WRONG.
YOU SEE, I DON'T SHARE
YOUR DEATH WISH.
I'M QUITE A HEALTHY MAN
WITH EXCELLENT EXPECTATIONS
AS TO MY LONGEVITY.
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
I WAS ONLY PROPOSING
A SOCIAL DRINK
BETWEEN THE TWO OF US.
I WILL DRINK FIRST.
SUCH A RITUAL.
SUCH A TRIBAL RITE.
KOMMISSAR, YOU HAVE
ONLY ONE PURPOSE WITH ME.
WHY DON'T YOU TRY
TO GET IT OVER WITH?
IF YOU WANT TO DISARM
ME TO GET RID OF THIS,
IT WILL TAKE MORE
THAN A SOCIAL WINE.
YES, INDEED.
AS TO MY BUSINESS WITH YOU,
WE BOTH KNOW WHAT THAT IS.
I AM TO SEE TO IT
THAT YOU ARE DEAD
BY TOMORROW MORNING,
AND YOU SHALL BE, MAJOR.
WITH A CERTAIN
DEGREE OF IMMODESTY,
I CAN TELL YOU I HAVE
KILLED 800 TIMES YOU,
BUT I'VE DONE IT WITH SUBTLETY,
WITH INTEREST, WITH INGENUITY.
I AM THE LAST OF THE
IMAGINATIVE EXECUTIONERS.
AND HOW DO YOU
INTEND TO KILL ME?
LET ME TELL YOU WHAT, MAJOR...
LET'S HAVE A DRINK
OF WINE FIRST,
AND THEN I'LL TELL YOU.
SANTE.
AH. EXCELLENT.
FLAVOR, BOUQUET,
JUST THE PROPER
AMOUNT OF DRYNESS.
IT'S REALLY A MOST
EXCEPTIONAL WINE.
JOIN ME, MAJOR.
VERY WELL, KOMMISSAR.
I WILL HAVE A DRINK OF WINE.
THEN I MAY KILL YOU.
YES, YOU MAY VERY WELL TRY.
AND NOW LET ME TELL
YOU SOMETHING ABOUT US.
LET ME EXPLAIN THE
DIFFERENCE BETWEEN YOU AND ME.
YOU ARE A MALCONTENT, MAJOR.
YOU CAN NEVER ACCEPT
THAT WHICH IS ORDAINED.
I, ON THE OTHER HAND, I
ADAPT TO MY SITUATIONS.
I DON'T HAVE A
VERY LARGE SALARY,
AND MY JOB... AT LEAST
THE WAY IT'S LAID OUT...
IS RATHER A DULL ONE:
FINDING TRAITORS AND DEFECTORS
AND DOING AWAY WITH THEM.
AND IN YOUR CASE...
IN MY CASE...
IN YOUR CASE, I
CHOOSE TO PROLONG IT,
AND IN THE PROCESS
OF THIS PROLONGATION,
I HAVE COME UP WITH...
WITH SOMETHING THAT I THINK
IS A MOST BIZARRE AND
NOVEL METHOD OF EXECUTION.
ONE DESIGNED TO
CHALLENGE YOUR TALENTS,
FOR WE BOTH ARE WORTHY
ADVERSARIES... YOU AND ME.
I FEEL... VERY WEAK.
YOU... YOU, MONSTER.
YOU DRUGGED ME.
OH...
Kommissar: Greetings,
Major Kuchenko.
First of all, to
clear up one point...
As must be evident to you,
I've been imbibing this
particular drug for many years
and have reached a
point where I can drink it
by the gallon and
be quite unaffected.
As you've probably perceived,
I'm rather a gamesman
when it comes to killing.
I have my own rules
and ethics that apply,
and, Major Kuchenko,
listen to the following
quite carefully.
This is the game, and
these are the rules.
You have been asleep
for roughly three hours.
During that time, I have
placed a booby trap in this room.
It is not visible,
but it is attached to a
very common object.
If you trigger this object, you
will immediately be blown up.
Now the following proposition:
If during the next three hours,
you are able to find this
booby trap and cut the wire,
you'll be permitted to
leave the room alive.
This is a guarantee,
but the following conditions
are of the essence, Major.
You must actively
search for this booby trap,
and you must find it
and render it unusable.
Attempt to turn out the lights,
and you'll be shot at once.
The moment you stop an
active search, you will be shot,
or if you are unable to find the
trap at the end of three hours
or attempt to leave the room
during that time, I'm afraid
the same conditions apply.
You will receive a
bullet in the head.
So, there you have it, Major.
As a fellow expert in
the art of booby traps,
I think you will admit, Major,
that this situation has its own
special imaginative quality.
THE DOORKNOB.
INTERESTING IDEA.
THAT BIBLE THAT LOOKS
AS IF IT'S BEEN PULLED OUT.
POSSIBLE.
I THINK HE'S FOUND IT.
I DOUBT IT.
THE DRESSER DRAWER.
WAIT AND SEE.
YOU SEEM SO SURE.
SURE?
THAT HE'LL FIND THE TRAP.
NOT AT ALL. THAT'S NOT
WHAT I'M SURE ABOUT.
WHAT I MEAN TO SAY IS
THAT I'M REASONABLY SURE
HE'LL FIND IT, BUT HE'LL
FIND IT WHEN IT'S TOO LATE.
IS HE AT THE TABLE?
HE'S STRIPPING THE BED.
THAT'S WHERE
YOU PUT IT, ISN'T IT?
IN THE BED.
WARM NOW, BORIS.
EXTREMELY WARM, BUT NOT HOT.
THEN WHERE?
PLEASE, KOMMISSAR, TELL ME!
WHAT'S HE DOING NOW?
WELL, WHAT'S HE DOING NOW?
HE'S AT THE TELEPHONE.
I THOUGHT FOR A MINUTE...
YOU THOUGHT WHAT?
THE TELEPHONE.
HOT, BORIS.
EXTREMELY HOT.
THE TELEPHONE?
PRECISELY.
THE TELEPHONE.
BUT... BUT HE JUST
LIFTED THE RECEIVER.
INDEED.
HE LIFTED THE
RECEIVER TO CALL OUT.
IF, ON THE OTHER HAND,
THE MAJOR'S PHONE WERE TO RING,
AND HE WERE TO
ANSWER IT... THAT'S IT!
THAT'S IT.
IF HE PICKS IT UP
AFTER IT RINGS.
AH, YOU'VE GOT
IT NOW, MY FRIEND.
IF THE MAJOR'S PHONE
RINGS AND HE ANSWERS IT,
I'VE PLACED A TINY PLASTIC
BOMB INSIDE THE MECHANISM.
THE EXPLOSION...
THE EXPLOSION WILL ONLY OCCUR
AFTER THE RING AND THE
LIFTING OF THE RECEIVER,
AT WHICH POINT, MAJOR
KUCHENKO WILL NOT EVEN HAVE TIME
TO SAY HELLO.
VASSILOFF!
SHOOT ME!
SHOOT ME, VASSILOFF!
SHOOT ME!
WHY DON'T YOU
KILL ME, VASSILOFF?!
SHOOT ME, VASSILOFF.
WHAT'S THE TIME, BORIS?
TEN MINUTES TO FIVE.
ALMOST DAWN, KOMMISSAR.
HE'S GOT ANOTHER TEN MINUTES.
Vassiloff: WELL, I
THINK IT'S TIME TO, UH...
HOW SHALL WE SAY...
"IMPLEMENT" THE THING?
YES, WOULD YOU RING
ROOM 963, PLEASE?
THANK YOU.
NOW, KOMMISSAR?
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!
HELLO.
HELLO!
YES, WOULD YOU RING
ROOM 963 AGAIN, PLEASE?
KOMMISSAR?
IT WOULD HAVE BEEN
BETTER, WOULDN'T IT?
IT'S ALL RIGHT.
I'LL GET HIM IN THE NEXT CITY...
NOW THAT I KNOW
THAT HE IS A MOST
RESOURCEFUL ADVERSARY.
NO, BORIS!
Operator: I'm sorry, sir.
The line seems
to be disconnected.
I'm unable to reach your party.
IT'S ALL RIGHT, OPERATOR, I...
I HAVE REACHED THEM.
Woman on loudspeaker: Flight 17, Transocean
Airways, now departing for New York City
via Belgrade, Rome, London.
All aboard, please.
MAJOR IVAN KUCHENKO,
ON HIS WAY WEST,
ON HIS WAY TO FREEDOM...
A FREEDOM BOUGHT AND PAID
FOR BY A MOST STUNNING INGENUITY.
AND EXIT ONE
KOMMISSAR VASSILOFF,
WHO FORGOT THAT THERE
ARE TWO SIDES TO AN ARGUMENT
AND TWO PARTIES ON THE LINE.
THIS HAS BEEN THE TWILIGHT ZONE.
AND NOW, MR. SERLING.
NEXT TIME OUT ON
THE TWILIGHT ZONE,
WE ENLIST THE TALENTED
TYPEWRITER OF EARL HAMNER, JR.
AND PRESENT A STUNNINGLY
CONCEIVED SHOW CALLED,
"STOPOVER IN A QUIET TOWN."
IT WILL STAR BARRY
NELSON AND NANCY MALONE
AND IT WILL PROVIDE THE
KIND OF SHOCK ENDING
THAT PUNCHES THE EMOTIONAL
EYE WITH UNEXPECTED FORCE.
NEXT TIME, "STOPOVER
IN A QUIET TOWN."
WITH THE KEY OF IMAGINATION.
BEYOND IT IS
ANOTHER DIMENSION...
A DIMENSION OF SOUND,
A DIMENSION OF SIGHT,
A DIMENSION OF MIND.
YOU'RE MOVING INTO A LAND OF
BOTH SHADOW AND SUBSTANCE,
OF THINGS AND IDEAS.
YOU'VE JUST CROSSED
OVER INTO THE TWILIGHT ZONE.
YES?
Man: Is this Major Kuchenko?
WHO IS CALLING?
This is Major
Kuchenko, isn't it?
WHO IS CALLING?
Major, you don't know me,
but I've heard of your
recent arrival here,
and I wanted you to
know that you have friends.
WHO IS THIS SPEAKING?
IS THIS A FRIEND ALSO?
Yes... a good friend, Major.
Not known to you yet, perhaps,
but soon to become acquainted.
May I impose upon you
to remain in your room...
AND WHY?
WHY DO I HAVE TO
STAY IN MY ROOM?
WE'LL BE MAKING CONTACT
WITH YOU VERY SOON, MAJOR.
YOUR WELL BEING IS
OUR DEEP CONCERN.
NOW, KOMMISSAR?
MAJOR, MAY I COUNT ON
YOU TO SHOW GOOD SENSE?
FOR YOUR OWN SAFETY,
REMAIN IN YOUR ROOM.
YOU'LL BE SEEING YOUR
FRIENDS BEFORE LONG.
GOOD-BYE.
NOW, KOMMISSAR.
THE FOX IS IN THE TRAP.
I COULD MAKE HIS
HEAD LEAVE HIS BODY
FROM THIS DISTANCE.
THAT WOULD GIVE YOU
PLEASURE, WOULDN'T IT?
A GREAT DEAL OF
PLEASURE, KOMMISSAR.
TELL ME WHEN.
EVEN WHEN HE LIES DOWN, I
CAN STILL AIM FOR HIS HEAD.
YES, I BELIEVE IT, BORIS.
I KNOW OF YOUR PROWESS.
OH, PUT THAT GUN AWAY FOR A BIT.
PUT IT AWAY?
OH, LAY IT ASIDE.
WHAT, ARE WE NOT
GOING TO KILL HIM?
THE IMPATIENCE OF THE BOURGEOIS.
THEY DO NOT SIP WINE.
THEY GULP IT DOWN
LIKE A SOFT DRINK.
THEY DO NOT CARESS
WOMEN; THEY DEVOUR THEM.
THEY DO NOT SNIFF AT THE
ESSENCE OF A RARE PERFUME.
NO... THEY TRY TO JAM
IT INTO THEIR NOSTRILS.
BORIS, THE GENTLEMAN
WILL DIE. INDEED, HE WILL.
BUT I WANT HIM TO
DIE WITH FINESSE,
WITH SUBTLETY AND A
DEGREE OF THOUGHT.
THAT IS A GOOD DEATH.
I DID NOT KNOW THERE
WAS A GOOD DEATH
AND A BAD DEATH.
UH-HUH.
A GOOD DEATH IS
THE DEATH OF ART.
A BAD ONE IS THE
DEATH OF A BUTCHER.
YOU, BORIS, ARE A BUTCHER.
I AM AN ARTIST.
YOU WILL HAVE YOUR
DEATH TONIGHT, BORIS,
WITHIN A FEW HOURS,
BUT WE WILL HAVE
KILLED WITH ARTISTRY
AND NOT WITH A MEAT CLEAVER
OR AN EXPLOSIVE BULLET
OR ANY OTHER OF
THE BUTCHER'S TOOLS.
NO, NO.
THIS DEATH WILL
BE LIKE A BALLET.
A CAT AND A MOUSE.
THIS IS THE LATTER...
THE INTENDED VICTIM...
WHO MAY OR MAY NOT
KNOW THAT HE IS TO DIE,
BE IT BY BUTCHERY OR BALLET.
HIS NAME IS MAJOR IVAN KUCHENKO.
HE HAS, IF EVENTS GO
ACCORDING TO CERTAIN PLANS,
PERHAPS THREE OR FOUR
MORE HOURS OF LIVING.
BUT AN IGNORANCE SHARED BY
BOTH HIMSELF AND HIS EXECUTIONER
IS OF THE FACT THAT BOTH OF
THEM HAVE TAKEN A FIRST STEP
INTO THE TWILIGHT ZONE.
YES?
Kommissar: MAJOR KUCHENKO?
WHO IS IT?
A FRIEND.
DON'T WORRY.
TURN OFF THE LIGHTS
IF YOU WANT TO,
FIND A HIDING PLACE.
I'LL COME IN WITH MY HANDS UP.
I'VE GOT MY PALMS OPEN.
MAJOR KUCHENKO?
AND YOU ARE...?
A FRIEND.
MAY I COME IN?
THANK YOU.
YOU ARE THE ONE
I SPOKE TO ON THE TELEPHONE?
MM-HMM.
WE HAD A BRIEF CHAT EARLIER.
WELL, IT'S QUITE A
PLACE YOU HAVE HERE.
WHO OCCUPIED IT BEFORE YOU?
A RAT?
I HAD NO LUXURY OF CHOICES.
NO, INDEED, YOU HAVE NOT.
IN THAT RESPECT, YOU ARE
A VERY POOR MAN, MAJOR.
BUT, THEN AGAIN, YOU HAVE A BED,
PICTURES ON THE WALL,
A CARPET... SUCH AS IT IS.
WELL, QUITE AN ADEQUATE
ACCOMMODATION.
AH... AND A MOST WONDERFUL VIEW
OF A BRICK BUILDING ALONGSIDE.
WELL, MAJOR, THERE
ARE WORSE PLACES
TO SPEND AN EVENING IN.
I KNOW.
I HAVE BEEN TO MANY OF THEM.
INDEED. INDEED, YOU HAVE.
SIBERIA IS QUITE COLD, ISN'T IT?
I'VE BEEN TOLD IT HAS A
MOST UNFORTUNATE CLIMATE.
YOU HAVE BEEN TOLD RIGHT.
IT IS A FREEZING JUNGLE.
A FREEZING JUNGLE.
OH, THAT'S MARVELOUS...
LOVELY IMAGERY.
SIBERIA AS A FREEZING JUNGLE.
YOU MAKE REFERENCE,
OF COURSE, TO THE PEOPLE.
I MAKE REFERENCE TO SOME PEOPLE.
OH...
IT MUST HAVE BEEN
UNPLEASANT FOR YOU.
SUFFICIENTLY UNPLEASANT
TO MOTIVATE YOU
TO RENOUNCE YOUR NATIVE COUNTRY
AND TO TRY AND SEEK
ASYLUM ELSEWHERE,
WHICH BRINGS US UP TO DATE.
YOU WERE A POLITICAL PRISONER.
YOU ESCAPED.
YOU SERVED A TERM OF 12 YEARS,
AND NOW YOU ARRIVED
HERE IN A NEUTRAL COUNTRY,
AND YOU ARE DESPERATELY
TRYING TO GET AN AIRCRAFT
TO TAKE YOU OUT OF
HERE TO A WESTERN NATION.
BUT, UH... YOU FEEL YOU
ARE UNDER SURVEILLANCE?
I KNOW I AM UNDER SURVEILLANCE.
WELL, DO YOU KNOW BY WHOM?
VERY WELL.
WELL, TELL ME. WHO ARE THEY?
LOOK IN THE MIRROR, KOMMISSAR.
DISCERNING, MAJOR.
YOU REMEMBER FACES.
I REMEMBER PAIN.
I REMEMBER SOME INTERROGATIONS
THAT WENT ON FOR MANY MONTHS.
I REMEMBER ONE PARTICULAR MAN
WHO SMOKED A LONG
CIGARETTE IN A HOLDER,
STOOD IN A CORNER,
NODDING AND SMILING
WHILE I WENT FROM
AGONY TO AGONY.
SO, MAJOR...
MAY WE DISPENSE
WITH THE AMENITIES,
THE MASQUERADES,
THE LITTLE GIVE AND TAKE
BETWEEN TWO STRANGERS
FEELING EACH OTHER OUT?
NOW WE GET TO THE POINT.
DID YOU HONESTLY THINK
WE WOULD PERMIT YOU
TO BOOK PASSAGE ON
AN AIRCRAFT OUT OF HERE?
IMPOSSIBLE.
AS A FORMER MEMBER
OF THE MILITARY
EVEN AS FAR BACK
AS 12 YEARS AGO,
YOU POSSESS INFORMATION
THAT WE WOULD FIND...
EMBARRASSING TO HAVE
RELEASED ELSEWHERE.
SO IT'S NOT REALLY TO OUR
ADVANTAGE THAT YOU LEAVE HERE.
OF COURSE, IT WOULD BE
SIMPLER AND MORE CONVENIENT
TO ACCOMPANY ME
BACK TO OUR EMBASSY.
I AM SICK... TIRED AND TORN,
KOMMISSAR, BUT I AM NOT INSANE.
I WOULD SOONER CUT MY WRISTS
OVER A SINK AND BLEED TO DEATH!
NO, MAJOR.
I AM AFRAID WE ARE OF TWO
MINDS ABOUT THAT KIND OF DEATH.
GENTLY, GENTLY, MAJOR.
HERE.
I BROUGHT SOME AMONTILLADO...
QUITE RARE AND MOST
PLEASING TO THE PALATE.
I'M AFRAID I WILL HAVE TO REPEAT
WHAT I SAID BEFORE,
KOMMISSAR: I AM NOT INSANE.
I'M QUITE AWARE OF
WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO ME
IF I WERE TO DRINK ANY OF THAT.
WITH YOUR INDULGENCE, MAJOR,
IF YOU ASSUME THIS TO CONTAIN
CYANIDE OR SOME OTHER POISON,
YOU'RE QUITE WRONG.
YOU SEE, I DON'T SHARE
YOUR DEATH WISH.
I'M QUITE A HEALTHY MAN
WITH EXCELLENT EXPECTATIONS
AS TO MY LONGEVITY.
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
I WAS ONLY PROPOSING
A SOCIAL DRINK
BETWEEN THE TWO OF US.
I WILL DRINK FIRST.
SUCH A RITUAL.
SUCH A TRIBAL RITE.
KOMMISSAR, YOU HAVE
ONLY ONE PURPOSE WITH ME.
WHY DON'T YOU TRY
TO GET IT OVER WITH?
IF YOU WANT TO DISARM
ME TO GET RID OF THIS,
IT WILL TAKE MORE
THAN A SOCIAL WINE.
YES, INDEED.
AS TO MY BUSINESS WITH YOU,
WE BOTH KNOW WHAT THAT IS.
I AM TO SEE TO IT
THAT YOU ARE DEAD
BY TOMORROW MORNING,
AND YOU SHALL BE, MAJOR.
WITH A CERTAIN
DEGREE OF IMMODESTY,
I CAN TELL YOU I HAVE
KILLED 800 TIMES YOU,
BUT I'VE DONE IT WITH SUBTLETY,
WITH INTEREST, WITH INGENUITY.
I AM THE LAST OF THE
IMAGINATIVE EXECUTIONERS.
AND HOW DO YOU
INTEND TO KILL ME?
LET ME TELL YOU WHAT, MAJOR...
LET'S HAVE A DRINK
OF WINE FIRST,
AND THEN I'LL TELL YOU.
SANTE.
AH. EXCELLENT.
FLAVOR, BOUQUET,
JUST THE PROPER
AMOUNT OF DRYNESS.
IT'S REALLY A MOST
EXCEPTIONAL WINE.
JOIN ME, MAJOR.
VERY WELL, KOMMISSAR.
I WILL HAVE A DRINK OF WINE.
THEN I MAY KILL YOU.
YES, YOU MAY VERY WELL TRY.
AND NOW LET ME TELL
YOU SOMETHING ABOUT US.
LET ME EXPLAIN THE
DIFFERENCE BETWEEN YOU AND ME.
YOU ARE A MALCONTENT, MAJOR.
YOU CAN NEVER ACCEPT
THAT WHICH IS ORDAINED.
I, ON THE OTHER HAND, I
ADAPT TO MY SITUATIONS.
I DON'T HAVE A
VERY LARGE SALARY,
AND MY JOB... AT LEAST
THE WAY IT'S LAID OUT...
IS RATHER A DULL ONE:
FINDING TRAITORS AND DEFECTORS
AND DOING AWAY WITH THEM.
AND IN YOUR CASE...
IN MY CASE...
IN YOUR CASE, I
CHOOSE TO PROLONG IT,
AND IN THE PROCESS
OF THIS PROLONGATION,
I HAVE COME UP WITH...
WITH SOMETHING THAT I THINK
IS A MOST BIZARRE AND
NOVEL METHOD OF EXECUTION.
ONE DESIGNED TO
CHALLENGE YOUR TALENTS,
FOR WE BOTH ARE WORTHY
ADVERSARIES... YOU AND ME.
I FEEL... VERY WEAK.
YOU... YOU, MONSTER.
YOU DRUGGED ME.
OH...
Kommissar: Greetings,
Major Kuchenko.
First of all, to
clear up one point...
As must be evident to you,
I've been imbibing this
particular drug for many years
and have reached a
point where I can drink it
by the gallon and
be quite unaffected.
As you've probably perceived,
I'm rather a gamesman
when it comes to killing.
I have my own rules
and ethics that apply,
and, Major Kuchenko,
listen to the following
quite carefully.
This is the game, and
these are the rules.
You have been asleep
for roughly three hours.
During that time, I have
placed a booby trap in this room.
It is not visible,
but it is attached to a
very common object.
If you trigger this object, you
will immediately be blown up.
Now the following proposition:
If during the next three hours,
you are able to find this
booby trap and cut the wire,
you'll be permitted to
leave the room alive.
This is a guarantee,
but the following conditions
are of the essence, Major.
You must actively
search for this booby trap,
and you must find it
and render it unusable.
Attempt to turn out the lights,
and you'll be shot at once.
The moment you stop an
active search, you will be shot,
or if you are unable to find the
trap at the end of three hours
or attempt to leave the room
during that time, I'm afraid
the same conditions apply.
You will receive a
bullet in the head.
So, there you have it, Major.
As a fellow expert in
the art of booby traps,
I think you will admit, Major,
that this situation has its own
special imaginative quality.
THE DOORKNOB.
INTERESTING IDEA.
THAT BIBLE THAT LOOKS
AS IF IT'S BEEN PULLED OUT.
POSSIBLE.
I THINK HE'S FOUND IT.
I DOUBT IT.
THE DRESSER DRAWER.
WAIT AND SEE.
YOU SEEM SO SURE.
SURE?
THAT HE'LL FIND THE TRAP.
NOT AT ALL. THAT'S NOT
WHAT I'M SURE ABOUT.
WHAT I MEAN TO SAY IS
THAT I'M REASONABLY SURE
HE'LL FIND IT, BUT HE'LL
FIND IT WHEN IT'S TOO LATE.
IS HE AT THE TABLE?
HE'S STRIPPING THE BED.
THAT'S WHERE
YOU PUT IT, ISN'T IT?
IN THE BED.
WARM NOW, BORIS.
EXTREMELY WARM, BUT NOT HOT.
THEN WHERE?
PLEASE, KOMMISSAR, TELL ME!
WHAT'S HE DOING NOW?
WELL, WHAT'S HE DOING NOW?
HE'S AT THE TELEPHONE.
I THOUGHT FOR A MINUTE...
YOU THOUGHT WHAT?
THE TELEPHONE.
HOT, BORIS.
EXTREMELY HOT.
THE TELEPHONE?
PRECISELY.
THE TELEPHONE.
BUT... BUT HE JUST
LIFTED THE RECEIVER.
INDEED.
HE LIFTED THE
RECEIVER TO CALL OUT.
IF, ON THE OTHER HAND,
THE MAJOR'S PHONE WERE TO RING,
AND HE WERE TO
ANSWER IT... THAT'S IT!
THAT'S IT.
IF HE PICKS IT UP
AFTER IT RINGS.
AH, YOU'VE GOT
IT NOW, MY FRIEND.
IF THE MAJOR'S PHONE
RINGS AND HE ANSWERS IT,
I'VE PLACED A TINY PLASTIC
BOMB INSIDE THE MECHANISM.
THE EXPLOSION...
THE EXPLOSION WILL ONLY OCCUR
AFTER THE RING AND THE
LIFTING OF THE RECEIVER,
AT WHICH POINT, MAJOR
KUCHENKO WILL NOT EVEN HAVE TIME
TO SAY HELLO.
VASSILOFF!
SHOOT ME!
SHOOT ME, VASSILOFF!
SHOOT ME!
WHY DON'T YOU
KILL ME, VASSILOFF?!
SHOOT ME, VASSILOFF.
WHAT'S THE TIME, BORIS?
TEN MINUTES TO FIVE.
ALMOST DAWN, KOMMISSAR.
HE'S GOT ANOTHER TEN MINUTES.
Vassiloff: WELL, I
THINK IT'S TIME TO, UH...
HOW SHALL WE SAY...
"IMPLEMENT" THE THING?
YES, WOULD YOU RING
ROOM 963, PLEASE?
THANK YOU.
NOW, KOMMISSAR?
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!
HELLO.
HELLO!
YES, WOULD YOU RING
ROOM 963 AGAIN, PLEASE?
KOMMISSAR?
IT WOULD HAVE BEEN
BETTER, WOULDN'T IT?
IT'S ALL RIGHT.
I'LL GET HIM IN THE NEXT CITY...
NOW THAT I KNOW
THAT HE IS A MOST
RESOURCEFUL ADVERSARY.
NO, BORIS!
Operator: I'm sorry, sir.
The line seems
to be disconnected.
I'm unable to reach your party.
IT'S ALL RIGHT, OPERATOR, I...
I HAVE REACHED THEM.
Woman on loudspeaker: Flight 17, Transocean
Airways, now departing for New York City
via Belgrade, Rome, London.
All aboard, please.
MAJOR IVAN KUCHENKO,
ON HIS WAY WEST,
ON HIS WAY TO FREEDOM...
A FREEDOM BOUGHT AND PAID
FOR BY A MOST STUNNING INGENUITY.
AND EXIT ONE
KOMMISSAR VASSILOFF,
WHO FORGOT THAT THERE
ARE TWO SIDES TO AN ARGUMENT
AND TWO PARTIES ON THE LINE.
THIS HAS BEEN THE TWILIGHT ZONE.
AND NOW, MR. SERLING.
NEXT TIME OUT ON
THE TWILIGHT ZONE,
WE ENLIST THE TALENTED
TYPEWRITER OF EARL HAMNER, JR.
AND PRESENT A STUNNINGLY
CONCEIVED SHOW CALLED,
"STOPOVER IN A QUIET TOWN."
IT WILL STAR BARRY
NELSON AND NANCY MALONE
AND IT WILL PROVIDE THE
KIND OF SHOCK ENDING
THAT PUNCHES THE EMOTIONAL
EYE WITH UNEXPECTED FORCE.
NEXT TIME, "STOPOVER
IN A QUIET TOWN."