The Sopranos (1999–2007): Season 5, Episode 5 - Irregular Around the Margins - full transcript
A car crash puts Tony and Adriana in a compromising position, and Cousin Tony tries to keep Chris from getting wrong the impression and wrong information.
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- Dad.
- Hey.
What are you doing here?
Well, I got an office here.
- You come down with Finn?
- And some people.
Promise me no drinkin'
and drivin'.
Who's your designated driver?
I'm not the one with all
the dents in their car.
All right, have fun, huh?
Need some money?
Have a good time, sweetheart.
Be careful!
- You see Meadow?
- Yeah, I wish I knew she was here.
I wonder what the fuck
she's thinkin'.
I'm sorry, Ton'. Some kid
had a seizure upstairs,
- it's been a horrible night.
- Hey, Ton',
Vito and Gene just called,
they're five minutes away.
We're leaving.
Here. All right, call 'em
and tell 'em to meet us
at Bud's Butter Bun
on Broadway and 18th.
All right.
Did I just see your father?
He's got an office here.
Saturday night?
That's dedication.
The guy sure can
put in the hours.
Let's go someplace else.
Tony's spendin'
so much time at the club.
Do you think that might have
something to do with you?
Oh, if you think
I'm gonna blow this guy
for your sick purposes
you are sadly mistaken.
So go on about this phone call
the other night.
It was just some guy
with a Southern accent.
Christopher grabbed the phone,
he yelled at him
for callin' the house,
- said he'd see him down there.
- Down where?
Did you check
the log on his cell?
Not since I almost
got caught doin' that,
and I am not doin' it again.
Wait till he goes
into the shower.
See if there's
a 4-0-4 or 3-3-6,
and memorize any other numbers
you don't recognize.
- What's the matter?
- I got to go to the bathroom.
- I know, you said.
- No, I-I got to go.
- Number two.
- I'll take you to your car.
No, I got to go now.
Oh my God.
You okay?
We're almost there.
Try to relax.
Don't you got a general
anesthetic or somethin'?
This lidocaine doesn't do much.
We are... done.
Jan, want to do your thing?
Just keep a little pressure.
All right.
I'm gonna get this
down to the lab,
see what's what.
Okay.
There we go.
- You okay?
- You think he got it all?
We hope so. Meantime,
there's a canteen on Level L.
I'll let you know when
the results come back.
Does having a bowel movement
relieve the pain?
Yeah.
Would you describe the diarrhea
- as loose or liquid?
- Liquid.
But this is gettin'
so I'm afraid
to be away from the toilet.
I'm so scared
I'm gonna have an accident.
- Is this tender?
- No.
Sit up.
- How's your personal life?
- What do you mean?
Well, sometimes GI disturbances
are stress-related.
Is there anything unusual
that might be giving you the jimjams?
I just want somethin'
for my stomach
so I can quit
goin' to the bathroom.
That's what's givin' me stress.
Why don't you get dressed?
We'll talk in my office.
I hear you're spending time
with today's youth.
You lost me.
Meadow said she saw you
at Adriana's club.
I got to explain my business to you now?
After so many years?
- No, it's your life, Tony.
- Got that right.
What did you do to your head?
Did you fall again?
Banged it on the medicine chest.
Don't worry 'bout it.
It's nothin'.
There's your allowance.
Now that actually
looks like fruit.
Yeah, it's so hard.
What do you do it for?
Irritable bowel syndrome?
He'll know more when
the tests come back.
I still got to bring him
a stool sample.
Jesus, please.
You were the one who yelled
at me to go to the doctor.
I got to know every detail?
I could be really sick,
Christopher.
Yeah, my Aunt Josephine
had colon cancer.
Her whole asshole rotted out.
I may have to go into therapy.
Plus, they're gonna
put me on Prozac.
For diarrhea?
To help me cope
and handle stress,
which is a lot
of what causes it.
What do you got to
be stressed about?
That bar?
War, Christopher?
The Middle East?
You don't listen
to the President?
We're gonna mop the floor
with the whole fuckin' world.
The whole world's
gonna be under our control,
so what are you worked up about?
Oh, give me the Orioles
over the Tigers for two,
and the Jays over
the Rangers, three G's.
I'm just gettin' my day planner.
No, I'm done.
My stupid car.
5,000 miles
and the alternator's goin'.
What about you?
Mimi said you went to the doctor.
I've been havin'
trouble with my stomach,
that's why I'm drinkin'
White Russians.
What, you got ulcers already?
- It's called IBS.
- What's that?
Irritable bowel syndrome.
My mother had that all her life.
See this?
- Yeah, I noticed that. What happened?
- It's cancer.
- What?
- Yeah, squamous.
Oh my God, that's terrible.
Well, they think they got it all.
Knock wood.
Just cancer.
The things that run
through your head, you know?
- Sure.
- I got a top guy, though...
Katz.
Hesh recommended him, naturally.
So this...
disease you got.
What causes it?
I did a Google on it
and like the doctor, too.
They all say a lot
of it's psychological.
So on top of everything,
now I'm a head case.
No, come on,
stop blamin' yourself.
Christopher don't want to know,
but not that I blame him.
I got to take off.
AJ should be comin' home
from his volleyball thing.
Listen, don't say
anything to anybody, okay?
People hear cancer,
they start to bury you already.
And you don't tell
anybody what I told you.
All right, take care
of yourself.
Say hi to Anthony.
- Yeah.
- You're such a good father.
I wish my dad
had been like that.
Good night, dear.
It's a straight shot
on I-95 to Raleigh.
You give this shit to the fence,
I'll meet you
in Winston-Salem,
we'll load up the cigs
and come home.
We're pickin' up
so many cigarettes,
why don't we instead of two vans
rent a deuce and a half?
You know, share the drivin'.
Because the cops...
The van's under the radar.
- Eric Estrada over here.
- You forgot your folic acid.
What is all this stuff?
A beauty parlor chair?
If they even heard of
electrolysis down there.
- Where are you goin'?
- Jesus Christ, go back to bed.
What the fuck's your problem?
My fuckin' tooth is killin' me.
Well, you should
go back to the dentist.
Why do you have to go anyway?
Can't they just
drop this stuff off?
Tony wants me to talk
to the guy down there.
The jerk you were
yellin' at on the phone?
Is that the cigarette thing
you were talkin' about?
Six different kinds of dope you get
to take for a stomach-ache,
I got an impaction, I can't take shit
besides oil of clove, 'cause I'm sober.
I know, it's hard. I'm sorry.
Have a nice trip.
- I love you, call me.
- She's got diarrhea.
Whoops.
You want?
Aw, twist my arm.
I'm expectin' some guys
from New York, so...
No problem.
I got plenty to do out there.
- Ah. Who's this on?
- Please. It's called "The Lost Boys."
Sil's been raggin' on me all week
for me to play 'em here.
Their manager or somebody
owes him money.
So, I thought
this was your day off.
Chrissy's away.
I don't like stayin' home alone.
Although, at least
I can pour a glass of wine
without him givin' me
"the expression."
Yeah. Yeah, I know
that look.
The constipated owl look.
You know, when I first
met you I was scared of you.
Really?
Yeah, but I'm scared
of everybody.
It's always my first reaction.
Well, you're not scared
of me now, are you?
No.
You want to shoot?
Huh?
Make it interesting,
say a buck a game.
Mmm?
No, it's the round thing
in the middle there.
How you feelin'?
Everything all right in here now?
- Your stomach all right?
- I know what you're doin'.
Don't distract me.
Oh.
- Ho!
- Hmm.
I've been hustled.
- Did I get your toe?
- No. No, no, no.
I'm so sorry.
Come on, get up.
Come on.
Aw, shit.
All right.
Wait.
Yeah, go on.
- Tony here?
- Yeah, come on in.
Hey.
Let me know
if you guys need anything.
What, are you gonna tell me
about the traffic again?
Here, our friend
sent this for you.
Thank you for taking
the appointment.
And I know I'm on probation,
and I deeply regret...
what I did.
My nephew's fiancee.
I know what you're thinking.
So?
Well, nothing happened,
but it could've very easily.
I mean, she really got to me,
this young lady.
She, uh...
What?
This is a very big step.
Yeah, tell me about it.
I mean, that you've come here
to talk about this impulse
instead of just acting
on it without thinking.
No, I always think.
- Really?
- Yeah.
Having sex with
your mistress' cousin,
like the mistress wasn't enough
to piss off your wife.
Tell me about the niece.
She's drop-dead gorgeous.
Someone like her I could...
I could do it right this time,
I could start
a whole new family.
I'm young enough.
Fuck 'em all.
And this is something
you're contemplating?
What? It would be
a disaster
of major proportions.
Carmela... I'd get
hosed financially.
There would be no reasoning
with her after that.
And my nephew,
it would kill him...
after years of grooming him
to be my number two.
And it would be very bad
for the girl.
She doesn't deserve that.
I mean, I'm not stupid.
I know part of it's this
father-figure thing...
you know, on account
of hers ran off.
It would be like committing
an act of symbolic incest.
Whatever.
Look, what am I gonna do?
I got lucky the first time,
'cause I was able
to control myself,
- but you only get one of those.
- Rationalizing.
"I can't control myself."
You can.
I don't know.
It's different for women.
It's all about up here with them.
She could make a play for you.
You might want to think about
how you're going to establish
limits and boundaries.
For example,
you could tell her she
means a great deal to you,
but you think of her
as a daughter.
Even if I want to
fuck her brains out.
This is a milestone for you.
You're at a very
important crossroads.
For once you want to avoid
doing something
you know is wrong
and would be destructive
both to yourself
and to the people
you care about.
That's growth.
That's progress.
Just tell me what
I'm supposed to do.
You have to be
honest with yourself.
I know this is a powerful urge,
but if you can't
keep it in your pants,
you have to stay away from her.
You know...
not long ago,
you stood in my outer office.
I recall you used the words
"drop-dead gorgeous" about me
and how you had to have me.
I said I wouldn't date you,
and look, you survived.
What a horrible
fucking job you have.
How do you do it?
But what happens
now is your choice.
Act and create a bed of misery,
or you can look at this
as a chance to do something good.
You say she respects you.
Be worthy of respect.
See if you can remain
a friend to this woman,
a help to her.
You know,
Tony had ducks one time...
in his pool.
You need to find out
where Chris went.
I'm getting this vibe from him.
Who? Tony?
He's really nice.
He listens.
He's kind of attractive...
definitely an alpha male...
but what if Christopher
found out?
What?
I'm not gonna fuck him.
Then, what are you
talking about?
I love Christopher, and sooner
or later we're gonna get out
from under all this shit
and leave this fucking state.
Jesus Christ.
She's a good-looking woman,
and she wants
to fuck Barney Rubble?
"Well, we really don't know him.
He listens."
Excuse me, is this seat taken?
- Tony, hi.
- Hey. How you doing?
Well, why I'm here,
Patsy's bringing somebody by,
- I'm gonna need to use the office.
- No problem.
I made a resolution.
I got to start spending
a lot more time on the floor.
Crack the whip.
I'm beat, tell you the truth.
I think I'm gonna grab
40 winks till Patsy gets here.
Wait, you don't have
Chrissy's cell, do you?
He called but he didn't
leave a new number.
He'll probably try you again.
He's due back tomorrow.
Oh, excuse me.
- I'll come back.
- No, I'm all right.
This mole back there looked
irregular around the margins.
Every time I see anything now,
I think I got melanoma.
I can imagine.
Hi, it's Adriana
at The Crazy Horse.
Yeah, I need a car, please.
Just tell him to wait outside.
What, your car still?
Yeah, they're replacing
the alternator.
You want a belt?
What I could
really use is some...
I wouldn't say no.
Get me motivated
to clean the house
before Christopher gets back,
except I'm all out.
It's 2:00, Cross-Eyed Billy probably
left the Bing already.
I know a guy, Andre,
he's always up.
Well, cancel the car,
I'll give you a ride.
You know who thinks
you're cute...
is Marlene.
She's got to be over 30,
isn't she?
She's 31.
You know who you
ought to introduce me to
is that friend a yours.
Who?
The one you brought over
to the house that time.
Tall, kind of blondish,
brownish hair...
- Danielle from Whippany.
- She's dead.
What?
Yeah, she drowned on a picnic.
Oh.
You know, I thought I picked up on
something between her and me.
I'm not trying to be conceited.
Tony!
I've reviewed your chart
and ruled out internal injuries,
so you're free to go.
I'll have the nurse
process your discharge orders.
Whoa, whoa.
This was a very bad accident.
Are you sure you
did all the tests?
I can afford it.
I did the appropriate tests.
I have a medical degree
from Johns Hopkins.
My grandmother was
the first black woman licensed
to practice medicine
in Delaware.
All right, take it easy.
The young lady that I was with,
they said she was okay,
but could I see her?
Ade.
- Hi.
- Hi.
They say you're gonna be fine,
they just want to keep
you here for observation.
You know, be on the safe side.
I don't even remember
what happened.
There was a raccoon in the road,
I swerved.
- How's your car?
- Escalade?
It's totaled.
Probably saved our life.
Are you okay?
Yeah, they're gonna let me go.
I want to go too.
Chrissy's coming home today.
We should probably
talk about that.
Oh.
Yeah.
Right.
Dude, how you doing?
I hit the fucking
mother-lode.
20 Gs of product a week.
Little Paulie's behind me
- with the other half.
- Fuck me.
Now, 20% of this load, they can stamp
the packs for the vending machines.
The rest, the cartons can
go straight to the bodegas,
let them worry about the stamps.
I'm beat.
I'm gonna hit the fucking rack,
have Ade cook me up
a nice carbonara.
What's the matter?
Don't know how to tell you,
but Adriana's in the hospital.
- She was in an accident.
- What? When?
Last night
around 2:00.
Jesus Christ, what happened?
Is she all right?
She got banged up,
but she's gonna be okay.
The drinking and driving...
I told her!
- Where is she?
- Mount Mercy in Dover.
- Dover?
- Apparently they swerved
- to avoid a deer in the road.
- They?
- Her and Tony.
- Tony? Soprano?
- Uh-huh.
- Is he all right?
Not a scratch.
The fucking luck on this guy.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, Dover.
Right, she's got an aunt she's close
to out there who's been sick.
She's friends with Tony's aunt.
All right, somebody
take me to get my car.
I better get over there.
Fabio, put it up!
Thought I'd die in there
without a cigarette.
What, so you're
just not gonna talk?
I almost got killed,
Christopher.
I'm just curious.
What the fuck were you doing
in the middle of the night
in the middle of nowhere
in a car with my uncle?
He was driving me home.
- Fucking Dover?
- We were talking.
W- we were going
to get something to eat.
I get off of work,
I don't want to go right home.
You weren't even there.
No, I was
in a fucking Ride-A-Rent
busting my ass with a bunch
of rednecks making a living,
to buy you alcohol and coke
and all the other shit
you shovel into your mouth!
2:00 in the fucking morning?!
Don't fucking lie to me!
I can't stand it!
Nothing was going on,
Christopher!
- I should've made you walk home!
- I swear to God.
You know how this looks?
Don't talk to me!
Shut your mouth!
You wanted to see me?
- Is Adriana okay?
- She's fine.
People who don't clean up
after their pets...
Pop this in that basket
for me, will you?
It's blind luck, that accident.
Cop told me he thought
he was coming up
on a fatality
when he saw the car.
I would be thinking
the same thing if I were you,
but it's not true.
I don't know what
you're talking about.
Her car was in the shop,
I was driving her
home from work,
that's all.
We were looking to get a burger.
In Dover.
What difference does it make?
You don't seem to give
a shit she almost died.
She could've been paralyzed
or scarred up,
and you got a puss on?
What were you doing out there
alone in a car with my fiancee?
We were talking about you,
you selfish prick,
and how you're the best thing
that ever happened to her.
Oh, you don't think this
fucking devastates me?
Well, frankly, you scored
so far over your head
when you got her,
what do you expect?
What the fuck are you
talking about?
She's a knockout,
a 10, and look at you.
You're average at best,
so you better reconcile
yourself with that,
or you're gonna be fucking
paranoid your whole life.
Oh, so this is
my fucking fault now?
Nothing happened,
and I'm not gonna say it again!
And you should've married
that girl two years ago.
Everybody knows you've been
the biggest fucking cooze hound
around the past
four or five years.
Your mid-life crisis.
You'd fuck a catcher's mitt.
On everything I hold sacred,
on my children,
there's nothing going on
between me and Adriana.
Tony walked away
without a scratch,
but Adriana suffered
a severe blow to the head.
Adriana got caught giving
the big guy a blowjob.
And when the paramedics
found them,
she had his cock
still in her mouth.
Now, statistics show that
most single-car fatalities
are the result of guys popping
their load behind the wheel.
Apparently, he came
all over the sun visor.
Sanseverino.
Guess who went down
on Tony Soprano.
That's the truth.
It's fact.
If it was my old lady,
the next thing she would suck
- is a tailpipe.
- That pretty little trim
can suck this pipe
anytime she wants.
Like you would ever have a shot.
Hey, let me tell you something.
When Christopher was in rehab,
she was calling me all the time.
- I was this close.
- Then you got a problem,
'cause your braciole
isn't even that long.
What's so funny?
Nothing.
Didn't sound like nothing,
I want to hear the big joke.
Take it easy,
we're just shooting the shit.
We were just talking
about my braciole.
- Oh yeah, what about it?
- So, deal you in, huh?
I asked him a fucking question.
What are you breaking
my balls for?
I want a fucking answer.
What's so fucking hilarious,
- you fucking parade float?
- Oh!
I'm a fucking captain now.
You don't talk to me like that!
- Oh, come on, guys.
- Don't put your hands on me!
- Chrissy, for Christ's sake!
- Fuck all of youse!
- Oh! Whoa, whoa!
- Motherfucker!
- Hold it.
- Easy.
Vinar, Jimmy, please join me.
So talk to me, guys,
how do we look in these?
Hey, hon.
I already ate.
- There's a casserole in...
- You fucking lying bitch!
Ow! Stop it!
What are you doing?!
You were sucking his cock!
Georgie told me everything!
The surgeon
on the operating table
said you were
moaning Tony's name!
- What are you talking about?!
- You fucking lied to me!
What were you doing
in Dover then?
See?
You can't tell me,
'cause I know what you were doing!
Your other dope dealer's there.
I remembered, go ahead, deny it!
Okay! I was going out
to see Andre,
but I wasn't sucking anybody's cock!
How could you say that?
Oh, so you two
were just gonna go toot up
a bunch of lines,
go fucking birdwatching?
Oh, you son of a bitch.
I was gonna stay up all night
and clean this fucking shithole!
Everybody knows about it!
Everybody's talking about it!
- No, please!
- You want me to use you, bitch!
- You're fucking killing me!
- No, I don't, I love you!
Stop it.
- You motherfucker!
- Fucking whore.
Ow, my neck!
Get the fuck out of here!
I never want to see you again!
I thought you had
an algebra test.
- Oh, chill out.
- What did you say?
Well, look, I studied
for 45 minutes straight,
don't I get a break?
Hi. What's up?
Oh, AJ, how's it going?
Hey, Uncle Tony.
Did I come at a bad time?
I need to talk to you.
AJ, go upstairs, study.
- Well, what about the pizza?
- Now!
Study.
All right, what's up?
I went to the Belleville Tavern
after work,
and Larry down there said
our little cousin was
in there all fucked up.
Somebody told him what
was going on in the car.
There was nothing
going on in the car.
No, of course not,
but he thinks there was,
so he started drinking again,
he beat up Adriana
and he threw her out
of the fucking house.
Where's his fucking
self-control, this guy?
Little Paulie's out there
looking for him to rein him in,
but he was saying some
crazy things about you.
Oh, this goddamn kid.
Christopher's not
right in the head, Ton'.
Who the fuck knows
what he's capable of?
Well, he knows where to find me.
You see him you tell him that.
I got to use your john.
Get you a day early, huh?
I'll go to the store
in the morning.
Look, relax.
Go whenever you want.
What the hell is wrong with him?
What do you want, Tony?
He couldn't bring this in himself?
I can't even come in
and say hello?
What you want is to know if I heard
the disgusting shit they're saying.
At least have the guts
to come out and ask me.
- It isn't true.
- You know what? Fuck you!
Fuck me? Fuck you!
- You got to put your son in hiding
because of your
fucking philandering?
Afraid he'll get caught
in the crossfire? Your own son?
Christopher's upset, that's all.
He could come over.
He could say some things
- that a kid shouldn't hear.
- Just please leave.
I don't even
want to look at you.
Motherfucker!
Motherfucking gun!
Give me two.
This kid ain't gonna show up, T.
He's probably in some gutter.
Yeah, hopefully
he's wore himself down.
Where are you, you fuck!
He's got a gun!
I know you're
up there, motherfucker!
You know what to do down there!
You're fucking lucky!
You're fucking lucky I ran out of loads!
Shut up, you little cock,
- or I'll split your fucking wishbone.
- It's all over.
Everybody, enjoy the evening.
Unhappy customer.
Let me the fuck go!
I'll kill all of youse!
I'll fucking kill all of youse!
You draw down on the boss
of a fucking family?
- Huh?!
- You lied to me!
You were scoring coke with her!
She admitted it!
So what?! I can't relieve stress
every once in a while?!
I don't got enough
fucking problems?
You sent me to North Carolina
so you could fuck my girlfriend.
What kind of fucking animal
you think I am, huh?
The thought never
even entered my head!
You're a man!
You're alone in a car with her...
You fucking pushed me to this.
You pushed me to this!
Way I see it, he must've known
the gun was empty.
Look what he pumped
into your car.
What are you trying
to say, Paulie?!
What the fuck
you trying to say, huh?!
Either you tell me right now
that you can take it
into your heart
that I did not do this shit...
or this is as far as we go.
- Motherfucker.
- Tony, come on!
- Listen to somebody else for a change.
- Fuck him.
Tony, try it my way.
Listen to me.
Mister... Sorriano,
- what seems to be the matter?
- Soprano.
I'm fine. It's my friend here
who needs to talk to you.
You know where ER admitting is?
Look, you got someplace
maybe we could talk?
It's 3:00 A.M., and I just finished
a 17-hour rotation.
Any gunshot wounds
or broken kneecaps?
Two minutes.
You're an excellent doctor,
that's why I brought him here.
Come on.
This gentleman here
is the fiance
of the young lady
that I was with.
Now, he's got it into his head
that there was oral sex going on
at the time of the wreck.
- Listen, I...
- Hey, hey, hey!
Just a second.
Naturally, he's very upset,
so I need you
to tell him there wasn't.
He's obviously
feeling the pressure,
he's just gonna fucking lie.
I'm not in the custom
of lying about anything,
but whether somebody
was getting
something in the car,
how could I possibly
attest to that?
Well, as the attending,
you could explain
- how medically it's not possible.
- Excuse me?
If she was wearing her seatbelt,
then there would have been abrasions
to the lateral anterior aspect
of the clavicle, wouldn't there?
Or the right
mid-sternum?
Are you a physician?
No, I'm a pre-board certified
massage therapist.
So did she have any
of those kind of things?
Actually, yes,
on the right clavicle
and the sternum just above
the xiphoid process
which would indicate
an upright position
at the moment of impact.
So what he's saying is
that she was sitting up.
All right.
Thank you, doctor.
Come on.
For the kids,
the Make-A-Wish Foundation,
whatever... here.
Thank you!
What do you want from me?
I guess I believe you.
All right.
You threw food at Vito.
That's got to be resolved.
He was fucking laughing,
which was wrong.
But at this point now,
it don't make no difference.
Even if it wasn't true,
it's what people think.
They know you were out there
scoring coke with her.
What do you care
what people think?
You know the truth.
I got to live in the world.
And now I look like Joe Jerkoff.
No, no, no, no.
You know what?
I might as well have fucked her.
Thanks.
Hello?
I rang the doorbell six times.
- Nobody answered.
- What are you doing here?
I want to talk to you.
If you came to pick
him up, he's not going.
Oh, so you believe all that
shit they're saying, huh?
Am I that horrible?
Really?
Where there's smoke,
there's fire.
I don't know what you did.
What's gonna happen when
your children hear about this?
- Meadow already suspects you.
- Suspects what?
She saw you at the club.
She said she thought you were coked out.
What are you talking about?
I don't do drugs.
She knows about the accident.
What do you think she's gonna think?
And with Anthony at that age?
Oh, come on, the kids!
The kids... It's about you!
Fine, so it's all about me!
What, do I mean nothing to you?!
That I got to live with this
swirling around me?
Forget about what they're saying,
I'm asking you.
You think I'd have
sexual relations with her?
Adriana, who's gonna be
a member of this family?!
Now I want you
to answer me truthfully.
Look, I know I haven't
been a fucking saint, all right?
And you got plenty of issues
of your own on that subject.
But you haven't exactly
been a fucking saint yourself.
No, no, no, no, no, come here.
You think I would go near
that girl like that?
Thank you.
Look, I'm asking you
to pull with me
to put a good face
on this thing.
For the sake of the kids
and this family.
I got to bail you out?
It's never-ending,
your bullshit.
Use a fucking crosswalk!
Jesus Christ.
Don't get all excited.
Most of it's from the accident.
- You okay?
- What do you fucking think?
Kicked out of my house,
I may have ulcerated colitis
and you call me up.
We'd like your permission to put
a listening device in your business.
This relationship with Tony
could net us a lot of chatter.
Don't forget,
it's him we're after.
There is no relationship!
The faster we get Tony
and put him away,
the sooner you can
get on with your life.
We can get a court order
to install a device anyway,
- but this will make our lives simpler.
- Fuck you.
I do enough for you people.
You're not bugging my club.
Adriana...
it's a syndrome,
protecting abusers.
If it would've been Christopher
alone in a car with a woman,
I would've killed him.
Arthur's sending something
over with his compliments.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Enjoy.
- Nice to see you, Ton'.
- Oh, thank you.
- Gravy's good tonight.
- Mm-hmm.
Nice to see you.
I hope you have
a pleasant evening.
Ladies.
---
- Dad.
- Hey.
What are you doing here?
Well, I got an office here.
- You come down with Finn?
- And some people.
Promise me no drinkin'
and drivin'.
Who's your designated driver?
I'm not the one with all
the dents in their car.
All right, have fun, huh?
Need some money?
Have a good time, sweetheart.
Be careful!
- You see Meadow?
- Yeah, I wish I knew she was here.
I wonder what the fuck
she's thinkin'.
I'm sorry, Ton'. Some kid
had a seizure upstairs,
- it's been a horrible night.
- Hey, Ton',
Vito and Gene just called,
they're five minutes away.
We're leaving.
Here. All right, call 'em
and tell 'em to meet us
at Bud's Butter Bun
on Broadway and 18th.
All right.
Did I just see your father?
He's got an office here.
Saturday night?
That's dedication.
The guy sure can
put in the hours.
Let's go someplace else.
Tony's spendin'
so much time at the club.
Do you think that might have
something to do with you?
Oh, if you think
I'm gonna blow this guy
for your sick purposes
you are sadly mistaken.
So go on about this phone call
the other night.
It was just some guy
with a Southern accent.
Christopher grabbed the phone,
he yelled at him
for callin' the house,
- said he'd see him down there.
- Down where?
Did you check
the log on his cell?
Not since I almost
got caught doin' that,
and I am not doin' it again.
Wait till he goes
into the shower.
See if there's
a 4-0-4 or 3-3-6,
and memorize any other numbers
you don't recognize.
- What's the matter?
- I got to go to the bathroom.
- I know, you said.
- No, I-I got to go.
- Number two.
- I'll take you to your car.
No, I got to go now.
Oh my God.
You okay?
We're almost there.
Try to relax.
Don't you got a general
anesthetic or somethin'?
This lidocaine doesn't do much.
We are... done.
Jan, want to do your thing?
Just keep a little pressure.
All right.
I'm gonna get this
down to the lab,
see what's what.
Okay.
There we go.
- You okay?
- You think he got it all?
We hope so. Meantime,
there's a canteen on Level L.
I'll let you know when
the results come back.
Does having a bowel movement
relieve the pain?
Yeah.
Would you describe the diarrhea
- as loose or liquid?
- Liquid.
But this is gettin'
so I'm afraid
to be away from the toilet.
I'm so scared
I'm gonna have an accident.
- Is this tender?
- No.
Sit up.
- How's your personal life?
- What do you mean?
Well, sometimes GI disturbances
are stress-related.
Is there anything unusual
that might be giving you the jimjams?
I just want somethin'
for my stomach
so I can quit
goin' to the bathroom.
That's what's givin' me stress.
Why don't you get dressed?
We'll talk in my office.
I hear you're spending time
with today's youth.
You lost me.
Meadow said she saw you
at Adriana's club.
I got to explain my business to you now?
After so many years?
- No, it's your life, Tony.
- Got that right.
What did you do to your head?
Did you fall again?
Banged it on the medicine chest.
Don't worry 'bout it.
It's nothin'.
There's your allowance.
Now that actually
looks like fruit.
Yeah, it's so hard.
What do you do it for?
Irritable bowel syndrome?
He'll know more when
the tests come back.
I still got to bring him
a stool sample.
Jesus, please.
You were the one who yelled
at me to go to the doctor.
I got to know every detail?
I could be really sick,
Christopher.
Yeah, my Aunt Josephine
had colon cancer.
Her whole asshole rotted out.
I may have to go into therapy.
Plus, they're gonna
put me on Prozac.
For diarrhea?
To help me cope
and handle stress,
which is a lot
of what causes it.
What do you got to
be stressed about?
That bar?
War, Christopher?
The Middle East?
You don't listen
to the President?
We're gonna mop the floor
with the whole fuckin' world.
The whole world's
gonna be under our control,
so what are you worked up about?
Oh, give me the Orioles
over the Tigers for two,
and the Jays over
the Rangers, three G's.
I'm just gettin' my day planner.
No, I'm done.
My stupid car.
5,000 miles
and the alternator's goin'.
What about you?
Mimi said you went to the doctor.
I've been havin'
trouble with my stomach,
that's why I'm drinkin'
White Russians.
What, you got ulcers already?
- It's called IBS.
- What's that?
Irritable bowel syndrome.
My mother had that all her life.
See this?
- Yeah, I noticed that. What happened?
- It's cancer.
- What?
- Yeah, squamous.
Oh my God, that's terrible.
Well, they think they got it all.
Knock wood.
Just cancer.
The things that run
through your head, you know?
- Sure.
- I got a top guy, though...
Katz.
Hesh recommended him, naturally.
So this...
disease you got.
What causes it?
I did a Google on it
and like the doctor, too.
They all say a lot
of it's psychological.
So on top of everything,
now I'm a head case.
No, come on,
stop blamin' yourself.
Christopher don't want to know,
but not that I blame him.
I got to take off.
AJ should be comin' home
from his volleyball thing.
Listen, don't say
anything to anybody, okay?
People hear cancer,
they start to bury you already.
And you don't tell
anybody what I told you.
All right, take care
of yourself.
Say hi to Anthony.
- Yeah.
- You're such a good father.
I wish my dad
had been like that.
Good night, dear.
It's a straight shot
on I-95 to Raleigh.
You give this shit to the fence,
I'll meet you
in Winston-Salem,
we'll load up the cigs
and come home.
We're pickin' up
so many cigarettes,
why don't we instead of two vans
rent a deuce and a half?
You know, share the drivin'.
Because the cops...
The van's under the radar.
- Eric Estrada over here.
- You forgot your folic acid.
What is all this stuff?
A beauty parlor chair?
If they even heard of
electrolysis down there.
- Where are you goin'?
- Jesus Christ, go back to bed.
What the fuck's your problem?
My fuckin' tooth is killin' me.
Well, you should
go back to the dentist.
Why do you have to go anyway?
Can't they just
drop this stuff off?
Tony wants me to talk
to the guy down there.
The jerk you were
yellin' at on the phone?
Is that the cigarette thing
you were talkin' about?
Six different kinds of dope you get
to take for a stomach-ache,
I got an impaction, I can't take shit
besides oil of clove, 'cause I'm sober.
I know, it's hard. I'm sorry.
Have a nice trip.
- I love you, call me.
- She's got diarrhea.
Whoops.
You want?
Aw, twist my arm.
I'm expectin' some guys
from New York, so...
No problem.
I got plenty to do out there.
- Ah. Who's this on?
- Please. It's called "The Lost Boys."
Sil's been raggin' on me all week
for me to play 'em here.
Their manager or somebody
owes him money.
So, I thought
this was your day off.
Chrissy's away.
I don't like stayin' home alone.
Although, at least
I can pour a glass of wine
without him givin' me
"the expression."
Yeah. Yeah, I know
that look.
The constipated owl look.
You know, when I first
met you I was scared of you.
Really?
Yeah, but I'm scared
of everybody.
It's always my first reaction.
Well, you're not scared
of me now, are you?
No.
You want to shoot?
Huh?
Make it interesting,
say a buck a game.
Mmm?
No, it's the round thing
in the middle there.
How you feelin'?
Everything all right in here now?
- Your stomach all right?
- I know what you're doin'.
Don't distract me.
Oh.
- Ho!
- Hmm.
I've been hustled.
- Did I get your toe?
- No. No, no, no.
I'm so sorry.
Come on, get up.
Come on.
Aw, shit.
All right.
Wait.
Yeah, go on.
- Tony here?
- Yeah, come on in.
Hey.
Let me know
if you guys need anything.
What, are you gonna tell me
about the traffic again?
Here, our friend
sent this for you.
Thank you for taking
the appointment.
And I know I'm on probation,
and I deeply regret...
what I did.
My nephew's fiancee.
I know what you're thinking.
So?
Well, nothing happened,
but it could've very easily.
I mean, she really got to me,
this young lady.
She, uh...
What?
This is a very big step.
Yeah, tell me about it.
I mean, that you've come here
to talk about this impulse
instead of just acting
on it without thinking.
No, I always think.
- Really?
- Yeah.
Having sex with
your mistress' cousin,
like the mistress wasn't enough
to piss off your wife.
Tell me about the niece.
She's drop-dead gorgeous.
Someone like her I could...
I could do it right this time,
I could start
a whole new family.
I'm young enough.
Fuck 'em all.
And this is something
you're contemplating?
What? It would be
a disaster
of major proportions.
Carmela... I'd get
hosed financially.
There would be no reasoning
with her after that.
And my nephew,
it would kill him...
after years of grooming him
to be my number two.
And it would be very bad
for the girl.
She doesn't deserve that.
I mean, I'm not stupid.
I know part of it's this
father-figure thing...
you know, on account
of hers ran off.
It would be like committing
an act of symbolic incest.
Whatever.
Look, what am I gonna do?
I got lucky the first time,
'cause I was able
to control myself,
- but you only get one of those.
- Rationalizing.
"I can't control myself."
You can.
I don't know.
It's different for women.
It's all about up here with them.
She could make a play for you.
You might want to think about
how you're going to establish
limits and boundaries.
For example,
you could tell her she
means a great deal to you,
but you think of her
as a daughter.
Even if I want to
fuck her brains out.
This is a milestone for you.
You're at a very
important crossroads.
For once you want to avoid
doing something
you know is wrong
and would be destructive
both to yourself
and to the people
you care about.
That's growth.
That's progress.
Just tell me what
I'm supposed to do.
You have to be
honest with yourself.
I know this is a powerful urge,
but if you can't
keep it in your pants,
you have to stay away from her.
You know...
not long ago,
you stood in my outer office.
I recall you used the words
"drop-dead gorgeous" about me
and how you had to have me.
I said I wouldn't date you,
and look, you survived.
What a horrible
fucking job you have.
How do you do it?
But what happens
now is your choice.
Act and create a bed of misery,
or you can look at this
as a chance to do something good.
You say she respects you.
Be worthy of respect.
See if you can remain
a friend to this woman,
a help to her.
You know,
Tony had ducks one time...
in his pool.
You need to find out
where Chris went.
I'm getting this vibe from him.
Who? Tony?
He's really nice.
He listens.
He's kind of attractive...
definitely an alpha male...
but what if Christopher
found out?
What?
I'm not gonna fuck him.
Then, what are you
talking about?
I love Christopher, and sooner
or later we're gonna get out
from under all this shit
and leave this fucking state.
Jesus Christ.
She's a good-looking woman,
and she wants
to fuck Barney Rubble?
"Well, we really don't know him.
He listens."
Excuse me, is this seat taken?
- Tony, hi.
- Hey. How you doing?
Well, why I'm here,
Patsy's bringing somebody by,
- I'm gonna need to use the office.
- No problem.
I made a resolution.
I got to start spending
a lot more time on the floor.
Crack the whip.
I'm beat, tell you the truth.
I think I'm gonna grab
40 winks till Patsy gets here.
Wait, you don't have
Chrissy's cell, do you?
He called but he didn't
leave a new number.
He'll probably try you again.
He's due back tomorrow.
Oh, excuse me.
- I'll come back.
- No, I'm all right.
This mole back there looked
irregular around the margins.
Every time I see anything now,
I think I got melanoma.
I can imagine.
Hi, it's Adriana
at The Crazy Horse.
Yeah, I need a car, please.
Just tell him to wait outside.
What, your car still?
Yeah, they're replacing
the alternator.
You want a belt?
What I could
really use is some...
I wouldn't say no.
Get me motivated
to clean the house
before Christopher gets back,
except I'm all out.
It's 2:00, Cross-Eyed Billy probably
left the Bing already.
I know a guy, Andre,
he's always up.
Well, cancel the car,
I'll give you a ride.
You know who thinks
you're cute...
is Marlene.
She's got to be over 30,
isn't she?
She's 31.
You know who you
ought to introduce me to
is that friend a yours.
Who?
The one you brought over
to the house that time.
Tall, kind of blondish,
brownish hair...
- Danielle from Whippany.
- She's dead.
What?
Yeah, she drowned on a picnic.
Oh.
You know, I thought I picked up on
something between her and me.
I'm not trying to be conceited.
Tony!
I've reviewed your chart
and ruled out internal injuries,
so you're free to go.
I'll have the nurse
process your discharge orders.
Whoa, whoa.
This was a very bad accident.
Are you sure you
did all the tests?
I can afford it.
I did the appropriate tests.
I have a medical degree
from Johns Hopkins.
My grandmother was
the first black woman licensed
to practice medicine
in Delaware.
All right, take it easy.
The young lady that I was with,
they said she was okay,
but could I see her?
Ade.
- Hi.
- Hi.
They say you're gonna be fine,
they just want to keep
you here for observation.
You know, be on the safe side.
I don't even remember
what happened.
There was a raccoon in the road,
I swerved.
- How's your car?
- Escalade?
It's totaled.
Probably saved our life.
Are you okay?
Yeah, they're gonna let me go.
I want to go too.
Chrissy's coming home today.
We should probably
talk about that.
Oh.
Yeah.
Right.
Dude, how you doing?
I hit the fucking
mother-lode.
20 Gs of product a week.
Little Paulie's behind me
- with the other half.
- Fuck me.
Now, 20% of this load, they can stamp
the packs for the vending machines.
The rest, the cartons can
go straight to the bodegas,
let them worry about the stamps.
I'm beat.
I'm gonna hit the fucking rack,
have Ade cook me up
a nice carbonara.
What's the matter?
Don't know how to tell you,
but Adriana's in the hospital.
- She was in an accident.
- What? When?
Last night
around 2:00.
Jesus Christ, what happened?
Is she all right?
She got banged up,
but she's gonna be okay.
The drinking and driving...
I told her!
- Where is she?
- Mount Mercy in Dover.
- Dover?
- Apparently they swerved
- to avoid a deer in the road.
- They?
- Her and Tony.
- Tony? Soprano?
- Uh-huh.
- Is he all right?
Not a scratch.
The fucking luck on this guy.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, Dover.
Right, she's got an aunt she's close
to out there who's been sick.
She's friends with Tony's aunt.
All right, somebody
take me to get my car.
I better get over there.
Fabio, put it up!
Thought I'd die in there
without a cigarette.
What, so you're
just not gonna talk?
I almost got killed,
Christopher.
I'm just curious.
What the fuck were you doing
in the middle of the night
in the middle of nowhere
in a car with my uncle?
He was driving me home.
- Fucking Dover?
- We were talking.
W- we were going
to get something to eat.
I get off of work,
I don't want to go right home.
You weren't even there.
No, I was
in a fucking Ride-A-Rent
busting my ass with a bunch
of rednecks making a living,
to buy you alcohol and coke
and all the other shit
you shovel into your mouth!
2:00 in the fucking morning?!
Don't fucking lie to me!
I can't stand it!
Nothing was going on,
Christopher!
- I should've made you walk home!
- I swear to God.
You know how this looks?
Don't talk to me!
Shut your mouth!
You wanted to see me?
- Is Adriana okay?
- She's fine.
People who don't clean up
after their pets...
Pop this in that basket
for me, will you?
It's blind luck, that accident.
Cop told me he thought
he was coming up
on a fatality
when he saw the car.
I would be thinking
the same thing if I were you,
but it's not true.
I don't know what
you're talking about.
Her car was in the shop,
I was driving her
home from work,
that's all.
We were looking to get a burger.
In Dover.
What difference does it make?
You don't seem to give
a shit she almost died.
She could've been paralyzed
or scarred up,
and you got a puss on?
What were you doing out there
alone in a car with my fiancee?
We were talking about you,
you selfish prick,
and how you're the best thing
that ever happened to her.
Oh, you don't think this
fucking devastates me?
Well, frankly, you scored
so far over your head
when you got her,
what do you expect?
What the fuck are you
talking about?
She's a knockout,
a 10, and look at you.
You're average at best,
so you better reconcile
yourself with that,
or you're gonna be fucking
paranoid your whole life.
Oh, so this is
my fucking fault now?
Nothing happened,
and I'm not gonna say it again!
And you should've married
that girl two years ago.
Everybody knows you've been
the biggest fucking cooze hound
around the past
four or five years.
Your mid-life crisis.
You'd fuck a catcher's mitt.
On everything I hold sacred,
on my children,
there's nothing going on
between me and Adriana.
Tony walked away
without a scratch,
but Adriana suffered
a severe blow to the head.
Adriana got caught giving
the big guy a blowjob.
And when the paramedics
found them,
she had his cock
still in her mouth.
Now, statistics show that
most single-car fatalities
are the result of guys popping
their load behind the wheel.
Apparently, he came
all over the sun visor.
Sanseverino.
Guess who went down
on Tony Soprano.
That's the truth.
It's fact.
If it was my old lady,
the next thing she would suck
- is a tailpipe.
- That pretty little trim
can suck this pipe
anytime she wants.
Like you would ever have a shot.
Hey, let me tell you something.
When Christopher was in rehab,
she was calling me all the time.
- I was this close.
- Then you got a problem,
'cause your braciole
isn't even that long.
What's so funny?
Nothing.
Didn't sound like nothing,
I want to hear the big joke.
Take it easy,
we're just shooting the shit.
We were just talking
about my braciole.
- Oh yeah, what about it?
- So, deal you in, huh?
I asked him a fucking question.
What are you breaking
my balls for?
I want a fucking answer.
What's so fucking hilarious,
- you fucking parade float?
- Oh!
I'm a fucking captain now.
You don't talk to me like that!
- Oh, come on, guys.
- Don't put your hands on me!
- Chrissy, for Christ's sake!
- Fuck all of youse!
- Oh! Whoa, whoa!
- Motherfucker!
- Hold it.
- Easy.
Vinar, Jimmy, please join me.
So talk to me, guys,
how do we look in these?
Hey, hon.
I already ate.
- There's a casserole in...
- You fucking lying bitch!
Ow! Stop it!
What are you doing?!
You were sucking his cock!
Georgie told me everything!
The surgeon
on the operating table
said you were
moaning Tony's name!
- What are you talking about?!
- You fucking lied to me!
What were you doing
in Dover then?
See?
You can't tell me,
'cause I know what you were doing!
Your other dope dealer's there.
I remembered, go ahead, deny it!
Okay! I was going out
to see Andre,
but I wasn't sucking anybody's cock!
How could you say that?
Oh, so you two
were just gonna go toot up
a bunch of lines,
go fucking birdwatching?
Oh, you son of a bitch.
I was gonna stay up all night
and clean this fucking shithole!
Everybody knows about it!
Everybody's talking about it!
- No, please!
- You want me to use you, bitch!
- You're fucking killing me!
- No, I don't, I love you!
Stop it.
- You motherfucker!
- Fucking whore.
Ow, my neck!
Get the fuck out of here!
I never want to see you again!
I thought you had
an algebra test.
- Oh, chill out.
- What did you say?
Well, look, I studied
for 45 minutes straight,
don't I get a break?
Hi. What's up?
Oh, AJ, how's it going?
Hey, Uncle Tony.
Did I come at a bad time?
I need to talk to you.
AJ, go upstairs, study.
- Well, what about the pizza?
- Now!
Study.
All right, what's up?
I went to the Belleville Tavern
after work,
and Larry down there said
our little cousin was
in there all fucked up.
Somebody told him what
was going on in the car.
There was nothing
going on in the car.
No, of course not,
but he thinks there was,
so he started drinking again,
he beat up Adriana
and he threw her out
of the fucking house.
Where's his fucking
self-control, this guy?
Little Paulie's out there
looking for him to rein him in,
but he was saying some
crazy things about you.
Oh, this goddamn kid.
Christopher's not
right in the head, Ton'.
Who the fuck knows
what he's capable of?
Well, he knows where to find me.
You see him you tell him that.
I got to use your john.
Get you a day early, huh?
I'll go to the store
in the morning.
Look, relax.
Go whenever you want.
What the hell is wrong with him?
What do you want, Tony?
He couldn't bring this in himself?
I can't even come in
and say hello?
What you want is to know if I heard
the disgusting shit they're saying.
At least have the guts
to come out and ask me.
- It isn't true.
- You know what? Fuck you!
Fuck me? Fuck you!
- You got to put your son in hiding
because of your
fucking philandering?
Afraid he'll get caught
in the crossfire? Your own son?
Christopher's upset, that's all.
He could come over.
He could say some things
- that a kid shouldn't hear.
- Just please leave.
I don't even
want to look at you.
Motherfucker!
Motherfucking gun!
Give me two.
This kid ain't gonna show up, T.
He's probably in some gutter.
Yeah, hopefully
he's wore himself down.
Where are you, you fuck!
He's got a gun!
I know you're
up there, motherfucker!
You know what to do down there!
You're fucking lucky!
You're fucking lucky I ran out of loads!
Shut up, you little cock,
- or I'll split your fucking wishbone.
- It's all over.
Everybody, enjoy the evening.
Unhappy customer.
Let me the fuck go!
I'll kill all of youse!
I'll fucking kill all of youse!
You draw down on the boss
of a fucking family?
- Huh?!
- You lied to me!
You were scoring coke with her!
She admitted it!
So what?! I can't relieve stress
every once in a while?!
I don't got enough
fucking problems?
You sent me to North Carolina
so you could fuck my girlfriend.
What kind of fucking animal
you think I am, huh?
The thought never
even entered my head!
You're a man!
You're alone in a car with her...
You fucking pushed me to this.
You pushed me to this!
Way I see it, he must've known
the gun was empty.
Look what he pumped
into your car.
What are you trying
to say, Paulie?!
What the fuck
you trying to say, huh?!
Either you tell me right now
that you can take it
into your heart
that I did not do this shit...
or this is as far as we go.
- Motherfucker.
- Tony, come on!
- Listen to somebody else for a change.
- Fuck him.
Tony, try it my way.
Listen to me.
Mister... Sorriano,
- what seems to be the matter?
- Soprano.
I'm fine. It's my friend here
who needs to talk to you.
You know where ER admitting is?
Look, you got someplace
maybe we could talk?
It's 3:00 A.M., and I just finished
a 17-hour rotation.
Any gunshot wounds
or broken kneecaps?
Two minutes.
You're an excellent doctor,
that's why I brought him here.
Come on.
This gentleman here
is the fiance
of the young lady
that I was with.
Now, he's got it into his head
that there was oral sex going on
at the time of the wreck.
- Listen, I...
- Hey, hey, hey!
Just a second.
Naturally, he's very upset,
so I need you
to tell him there wasn't.
He's obviously
feeling the pressure,
he's just gonna fucking lie.
I'm not in the custom
of lying about anything,
but whether somebody
was getting
something in the car,
how could I possibly
attest to that?
Well, as the attending,
you could explain
- how medically it's not possible.
- Excuse me?
If she was wearing her seatbelt,
then there would have been abrasions
to the lateral anterior aspect
of the clavicle, wouldn't there?
Or the right
mid-sternum?
Are you a physician?
No, I'm a pre-board certified
massage therapist.
So did she have any
of those kind of things?
Actually, yes,
on the right clavicle
and the sternum just above
the xiphoid process
which would indicate
an upright position
at the moment of impact.
So what he's saying is
that she was sitting up.
All right.
Thank you, doctor.
Come on.
For the kids,
the Make-A-Wish Foundation,
whatever... here.
Thank you!
What do you want from me?
I guess I believe you.
All right.
You threw food at Vito.
That's got to be resolved.
He was fucking laughing,
which was wrong.
But at this point now,
it don't make no difference.
Even if it wasn't true,
it's what people think.
They know you were out there
scoring coke with her.
What do you care
what people think?
You know the truth.
I got to live in the world.
And now I look like Joe Jerkoff.
No, no, no, no.
You know what?
I might as well have fucked her.
Thanks.
Hello?
I rang the doorbell six times.
- Nobody answered.
- What are you doing here?
I want to talk to you.
If you came to pick
him up, he's not going.
Oh, so you believe all that
shit they're saying, huh?
Am I that horrible?
Really?
Where there's smoke,
there's fire.
I don't know what you did.
What's gonna happen when
your children hear about this?
- Meadow already suspects you.
- Suspects what?
She saw you at the club.
She said she thought you were coked out.
What are you talking about?
I don't do drugs.
She knows about the accident.
What do you think she's gonna think?
And with Anthony at that age?
Oh, come on, the kids!
The kids... It's about you!
Fine, so it's all about me!
What, do I mean nothing to you?!
That I got to live with this
swirling around me?
Forget about what they're saying,
I'm asking you.
You think I'd have
sexual relations with her?
Adriana, who's gonna be
a member of this family?!
Now I want you
to answer me truthfully.
Look, I know I haven't
been a fucking saint, all right?
And you got plenty of issues
of your own on that subject.
But you haven't exactly
been a fucking saint yourself.
No, no, no, no, no, come here.
You think I would go near
that girl like that?
Thank you.
Look, I'm asking you
to pull with me
to put a good face
on this thing.
For the sake of the kids
and this family.
I got to bail you out?
It's never-ending,
your bullshit.
Use a fucking crosswalk!
Jesus Christ.
Don't get all excited.
Most of it's from the accident.
- You okay?
- What do you fucking think?
Kicked out of my house,
I may have ulcerated colitis
and you call me up.
We'd like your permission to put
a listening device in your business.
This relationship with Tony
could net us a lot of chatter.
Don't forget,
it's him we're after.
There is no relationship!
The faster we get Tony
and put him away,
the sooner you can
get on with your life.
We can get a court order
to install a device anyway,
- but this will make our lives simpler.
- Fuck you.
I do enough for you people.
You're not bugging my club.
Adriana...
it's a syndrome,
protecting abusers.
If it would've been Christopher
alone in a car with a woman,
I would've killed him.
Arthur's sending something
over with his compliments.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Enjoy.
- Nice to see you, Ton'.
- Oh, thank you.
- Gravy's good tonight.
- Mm-hmm.
Nice to see you.
I hope you have
a pleasant evening.
Ladies.