The Sopranos (1999–2007): Season 4, Episode 1 - For All Debts Public and Private - full transcript
Tony's income is down thanks to a slowing economy but it's having an effect on everyone. He makes sure his capos know they're supposed to be earners. Uncle Junior meets Tony and he's worried about his trial that's starting in just over a week. He's also going broke because of lawyers fees and wants Tony to give him a bigger cut of the pie. Tony won't hear of it. Carmela is shocked to see Angie Bompiensero working in a grocery store and begins to worry about her own future should anything happen to Tony. She wants him to do a little estate planning. Tony however wants to start investing in property. FBI agent Deborah Ciccerone is still undercover working as Adriana's BFF. Christoper isn't keen on driving Tony around instead of Furio. He's also taken to using hard drugs. Tony has an important piece of information for him. Janice takes an interest in Ralph Cifarello. Junior puts Bobby Bacala in charge of his business affairs during the trial. Paulie is in jail on a gun charge but still angry with Tony, he reaches out to Johnny Sack.
"Italy was relieved today upon learning...
"that the country's high court had ruled
that influence peddling is not a crime.
"Said Franco Ferrarotti,
an Italian sociologist:
"'Essentially, the judges are saying
what everybody believes.'
"He was referring to raccomendazione...
"the Italian custom of seeking
special treatment from people in power.
"'This is our version of the Protestant ethic,'
Mr. Ferrarotti said.
"The case concerned a clerk of a civil court
in Potenza...
"who was jailed for promising
to speed up someone's trial.
"Evidence showed that
he received 88 pounds of fish...
"in return for his assistance."
Hello.
Yeah, she's here.
She's on duty today.
The same, undercover.
Yeah, let me have her call you back.
Deb, it was your mom.
You're complaining about
your paper on ethnicity.
Here's some interesting stuff
from your own background.
We're from Potenza?
I thought we were
Napoli-Daboli or whatever.
Neapolitan. But this
is about Italy as a whole.
Did the squirrels eat the bread I put out
for the ducks, or somebody sweep it up?
I do know that Meadow stepped
in some soggy bread with her bare feet.
You should've heard it.
What's that?
This is the New York Times that your friend
here has delivered to him at school...
for his Social Studies requirement,
then he doesn't read them.
- I find them piled in his room.
- Make a go of it at that new school.
You got no idea
what we did to get you in there.
There is no reason you shouldn't
be able to pass Social Studies.
You passing Social Studies?
You just revealed your own ignorance.
It's only been five days.
We didn't get grades yet.
I what? I revealed my own what?
Look at that.
Now, he's reading.
- Hey, everybody.
- Where's Furio?
How you doing, Ton'?
A.J., finish getting dressed.
- You want some coffee?
- No.
- Has Furio got that bug again?
- Tony likes to mix it up, you know.
Different cars.
What, the Caprice?
No, he's turning off.
Take me to my uncle's doctor.
Furio called me.
He's going to the fucking track today.
- So what about it?
- I don't know.
I'm driving again, all of a sudden.
So what? I gotta explain
why I want you with me this week?
- God forbid you'd explain.
- That's right.
- Now you're gonna get fresh about it?
- I'm just saying, I mean, I'm glad to do it.
I'm glad you're glad.
You know, your father was
like a mentor to me.
- Right.
- A standup.
You ask anybody.
Your old man was a legend.
He single-handedly hunted down
that New England crew.
Brought the war home to them up there.
Another Chevy.
Nuns.
Might be undercover Feds, but I doubt it.
He must be colicky.
I think he likes your hair better that way.
Mr. Soprano.
There she is.
- You be good now, don't start.
- You ought to see my finish.
You get sued for talk like that nowadays.
Then cancel my appointment.
Let me die now.
If a man can't voice to a beautiful woman...
the zephyrs that are blowing
through his mind...
God, listen to him today.
Go in there now,
and strip down to your shorts.
You see now? I'm not gonna touch that line.
Too much class.
- But as for that lovely laugh line...
- Come on, handsome, we're busy.
Give me that cheek, right here.
- I surrender, do with me what you will.
- Okay.
The doctor will be with you both.
So, what'd you wanna see me about?
- My trial starts a week from Tuesday.
- You'll beat it.
- Melvoin's good.
- We have to change our arrangement.
Which arrangement is that?
These fucking lawyers
are taking my internal organs.
$1 million for this trial,
Melvoin and Hirshorn are charging.
And that was bad enough.
Now they put this Harvard kid on,
this lackey.
I don't know what the fuck he does.
And then they just decided
we needed audibility experts to testify...
you can't definitively state what people
are saying on the government tapes.
I could fucking tell them that.
Those guys,
they got sound graphs and shit.
$50,000, the cocksuckers are charging.
Plus the minimization expert,
plus the fucking monthly expenses.
Fucking lexis fees, the Xeroxing.
An entire Northwest forest
must've given its life in Xerox paper...
for this one fucking trial.
I said to Mel,
"Can't we just at one fucking meeting...
"all read from the same sheet of paper,
pass it around?"
Our split stays the same.
You kept me in place as boss
to take the heat off you.
My legal problems have let you
go around like a gabavreche...
- two fucking years now.
- There you go.
Ten points.
I got medical bills, too, Anthony.
I got cash flow problems of my own.
A one-time hit, $50,000, $75,000
to cover the audibility expert.
I got two kids in private schools.
Goddamn it!
Get your shy running right.
That's what you should be focused on.
Would you like to try some kielbasa?
Kentshire farms. Nitrate-free.
I mean, don't get me wrong.
I like Versace's dinnerware...
but stamping your face
on every plate... The ego!
Look who's here.
My God, what are you doing home?
- I got to get this out to my car.
- Is that for us?
You're in a good mood.
Want me to fix you a plate?
Will you shut that pocket rat up?
- You wanna say hello to Danielle?
- Not really.
- I should go, anyhow.
- Enjoy your wine.
- Don't listen to his bullshit.
- I got to get up early tomorrow.
- No matter how much the john offers you?
- Pig.
This is beautiful.
- Where'd you get it?
- You said you were gonna go. Go.
- I got to get some sleep.
- I should go.
Froze to death in that mall today.
They go crazy with the air-conditioning.
- So, when am I gonna see you again?
- I'll call you.
Okay, sweetie.
Some of those bags look like Gucci.
Yeah, he gets that stuff all the time.
His cousin's a liquidator.
- Bye.
- See you.
- You are so fucking rude.
- I had a horrible goddamn day.
She's over here all the time lately.
Tony still acting all mean?
- Cosette, quiet.
- Fucking asshole.
Ever since I questioned his judgment
on some RalphielJackie Junior problem.
Like he's fucking infallible.
Pope Tony XXlll or some shit.
And now, of course, he starts in with
my father so I can be compared all negative.
You never know, I could
be on the endangered species list.
Chrissy.
Gonna get high?
Maybe I'll just smoke some.
That's more addictive than shooting.
I don't do it every fucking day now,
like some people.
I'm just chipping, I got it under control.
Chrissy, Tony loves you.
Why would he have you made
if he didn't depend on you?
He can depend on me.
When the fuck have
I ever not been there 100 percent?
Want some?
Can I talk to you a minute?
Turn this off?
Turn it down.
I'm worried, Tony.
- About my weight?
- About money.
You're getting a little less allowance
than usual. I told you, it's temporary.
Super Bowl last year,
we didn't lay enough off.
No, it's not just that.
I'm worried about you, about the future...
about me and the kids,
if something happens to you.
- I don't provide for you?
- Now.
I saw Angie Bonpensiero today.
She was handing out
free Polish sausage at the supermarket.
Don't start. I supported her.
You're so worried about the money.
Who is gonna support
your children and me...
if, God forbid, something happens to you?
That's the point. Sil? Paulie?
- That is frightening.
- You'll be taken care of.
You're set in perpetuity.
There's money in overseas accounts.
I don't have the serial numbers.
You'll have them when the time comes.
Not now.
For your own benefit.
So you're not an accomplice.
Jesus Christ, I been busting
my pick all day long...
to bring home the money
you're so concerned about.
I thought maybe I could have a sundae
and zone out in front of the frigging TV.
Because, A: You're right,
my job is extremely stressful...
I am talking about some
simple estate planning, Tony, that's all.
My cousin, Brian Cammarata, has helped
lots of people set up trusts for their kids...
- begin asset allocation...
- I got to spell this out for you?
I can't declare X amount of my income.
Your consulting fees
from Barone Sanitation you do.
We file a tax return
to justify the house, the cars.
We could put aside some of that
to start a portfolio.
Stocks?
You gotta be high in the
corporate structure to make that work.
We don't have
those Enron-type connections.
Bonds, then.
There are these things called "REITs"
Brian told me about.
Bonds, where's the capital for that?
In the Caymans or under the mattress...
or wherever you put it at zero growth.
The money stays put.
With what's going on globally...
- There's always some excuse.
- There's no cash in this house.
Not since our last bust.
Check the vents.
- And I provide for my children.
- Yes, Tony, you do.
But I don't know how you do it,
because you won't tell me.
Let me tell you something,
or you can watch the fucking news:
Everything comes to an end.
Good morning, Ton'.
- They over there?
- I was able to reach everybody.
What the fuck are you doing?
- What?
- You're wasting fucking ice.
- It's mostly melted.
- You're fucking arguing with me now?
No, Ton'.
You don't see the monthly statements.
We're hemorrhaging money out of here.
No, you're right, I don't.
- Think that shit grows on trees?
- Ice? No, I don't.
- Are you getting cute with me?
- No.
I think you are.
You're getting a fucking attitude on you.
I'm not.
- Ice, when it hangs around...
- Georgie, be quiet.
But it gets watery. It dilutes the drinks...
- especially Scotch.
- Jesus Christ.
Here, throw it all away.
Waste it all, fucking John D. Rockefeller!
Waste it all!
Conserve.
Where were you?
I wanna know why there's zero growth
in this family's receipts.
Where's the fucking money?
You're supposed to be earners.
That's why you got the top-tier positions.
So, everyone, go out to your people
on the street, crack some heads.
Create some fucking earners out there.
The guy...
We talked about this,
over at the other place with the guy.
The councilman.
What the fuck happened to that?
- It petered out.
- "It petered out."
- It died on the vine.
- "It died on the vine."
It died on the vine.
The guy, he moved or something.
Nobody knows
what the fuck I'm talking about!
We hear you.
My uncle...
the boss of this family...
is on trial for his life.
And what you people are
kicking up to him is a fucking disgrace.
You know how much lawyers cost?
A major RICO like his,
I'm the only one supporting him.
This thing is a pyramid,
since time immemorial.
Shit runs downhill, money goes up.
It's that simple.
I should not have to be coming here...
hat in my hand...
reminding you about your duty to that man.
And I don't wanna hear about
the fucking economy either!
Sil, break it down for them.
What two businesses have traditionally
been recession proof...
since time immemorial?
Certain aspects of show business,
and our thing.
Now, that's it, that's all I got to say.
Frankly, I'm depressed and ashamed.
Is that what your coach laid out for you
as a training breakfast?
The shelf in the garage is still loose.
You went down in the garage?
I'm gonna go check it out.
You said you'd wake up early,
come to church with me...
then go online and register for your classes.
I'll miss Grandma and Grandpa at dinner.
There's a back-to-school party for Hadley.
These boring Sunday dinners.
Can one of my new friends eat over?
Aunt Ro and Uncle Ralph will be here, too,
but I'm sure we can fit.
- You're not gonna lay out, Dad?
- It's too cold.
Ralphie and Ro are coming out here today?
I thought we got that straightened out
months ago.
And it's not "Uncle Ralph."
I asked you about inviting them
the other night, and you said...
I must've been focused on something else.
It's Ro's birthday, and she's very down.
Anthony.
I ever tell you about the time I had a Harley?
- Whoa, cool.
- '74 Shovelhead.
- I could blow off Porsches on that thing.
- Not my dad's Boxster.
- What's your name?
- Matt.
Matt, no offense, but your dad's
Boxster is a Porsche with panties.
He knows what I'm saying.
I mean, that's for the Hamptons, the Boxster.
I'm talking Turbo Carrera.
One time, I'm alongside this Turbo
with doctor plates.
We come off the line,
he's got this big Jew grin.
You're not Jewish are you?
- Half.
- Anyway, he knows it's all in fun.
At the Passaic Avenue
and New Dutch Lane intersection...
we're doing 110. Boom!
Right through the light.
He wasn't grinning then, boy.
I look back. He's white as false teeth.
Jason Mingelli's parents
let him get a YZ-250.
You get on that bike, I will cut
your legs off before the bike does.
- I had the high handlebars, you know.
- Bruce Dern, don't you have to go?
I got to hit the little boy's room.
You guys need some help?
In my day, there was a motorcycle
called the Vincent Black Shadow.
- Boy, did that thing take off.
- The hoods all drove those.
They beat you up that time,
you remember, on City Island?
He'd just gotten out of the Navy.
I think he weighed 105 pounds.
Did you see any action
in World War II, Hugh?
A little bit. I was stationed in Nova Scotia.
But I caught diverticulitis.
It's the weight loss she's talking about.
Oh, my God, you're eating, I'm so sorry.
- Don't worry about it, come in.
- You want something?
No, my God, thank you.
I just came over to borrow the samovar
for my cousin's baby shower.
This is my friend, Danielle Ciccolella.
This is Christopher's cousin Tony.
- Tony.
- How you doing?
His cousin Carmela.
- This is a beautiful home.
- Thank you.
Where you from, Danielle?
- Whippany.
- Want some anisette?
No, thanks.
This thing needs polishing.
- There's a bathroom downstairs.
- It's me, Janice.
- There's a bathroom downstairs.
- I know.
What?
- What are you doing?
- Nothing.
Come on.
I knew it.
Go ahead, you can do that.
How's Ro doing down there?
Very quiet, you know, it's to be expected.
They got her on medication.
I don't think it's helping.
"Ah, Bartleby! Ah, humanity!"
Danielle, did you see the loggia?
That loggia was my daughter's idea.
Nice?
Danielle, come check this out.
Come on.
What are you doing to me here?
I was stationed in Nova Scotia.
Well, I told you that.
Anyway, there was nothing for them
to do in Nova Scotia.
Great seafood, but other than that...
That's a lot of cracked corn.
All the ducks,
they've flown south for the winter.
So? I'll be ready for next season.
Thanks.
Red Suburban. I'll be over at Italianissimo.
Good news about the Esplanade.
The legislature's voted to refund the
special Newark development district...
along Frelinghuysen Avenue,
north from the Museum of Trucking.
Because of the vote, Omni is gonna
put up a hotel with a galleria...
on the first floor.
Word came down yesterday.
A galleria?
Fifty stores selling
sneakers and turnip greens.
It's a demographic imperative.
Hoboken's maxed out.
Your Prada people are already
moving to Down Neck.
Where are they gonna go next?
My old man had a piece of
the garbage transfer station...
in Lower Manhattan, back in the '70s.
People told him:
"Start buying up
the abandoned buildings around here."
- But he couldn't see it.
- And now it's TriBeCa.
I tell you, Tony...
I'm borrowing money myself to grab up
parcels along Frelinghuysen Ave...
through a shell company.
And a private citizen like you?
Who's gonna quibble
with patriotic entrepreneurism?
My uncle has property
down on Frelinghuysen.
Mr. Soprano.
I remember you
You're the one that
made my dreams come true
a few kisses ago
Oh, boy.
I'm gonna be busy the next couple months.
But after that, what would you say...
me and you...
una bella giornata, to that
city called Atlantic?
I have many dear friends there.
I could show you quite a time.
- Thank you, but I don't gamble.
- With me, it's never a gamble.
You know, today is my last day.
- Where you going?
- Back to school.
Anyway, I'll come say goodbye
when you're done here.
Excuse me.
All the fucking luck.
So, what is it today?
It's becoming clear to me...
Murf can't run my operations
while I'm in court.
He's starting to forget things. His words...
Sometimes there's food on the
front of his shirt, the poor bastard.
I'm gonna move Bobby up.
- I think it's a good choice.
- I wasn't asking, I'm telling.
- So you know who to talk to.
- Bobby know yet?
I think we should bring him in here.
He's gonna be a very happy man.
- Thought you were at the beauty parlor.
- I'm going to get the last of the tomatoes.
- Yeah, they were good last night.
- A little late in the season for ducks, no?
Not necessarily. The ones from
upper Canada, this is the south to them.
- Speak.
- I have a collect call for Mr. Walters.
Okay, operator.
John?
Right on time.
That's all I got, pal, time.
What the fuck happened out there?
Didn't Tony tell you? Sil?
They mentioned in passing that you were
doing the county book in Youngstown.
Didn't have long to talk.
Hello?
Let me first say,
I can't tell you how touched I was...
when my nephew told me
you wanted me to call.
Anthony only talks to me
through middlemen.
- So, what did they pinch you for?
- Gun charge.
I drove out to visit Lenny Scotise.
Don't know if you know Lenny.
- Him and I used to have that little club...
- Doesn't matter.
Anyway, my first night here...
we drive out to visit
Dean Martin's birthplace in Steubenville.
Cops pull us over for no left blinker.
Long story short,
they find a piece under the seat.
Fucking.38.
Turns out it was used in an unsolved
murder out here from eight years ago.
- Jesus.
- Yeah.
So what can I do to help?
You're too much. Nothing.
The lawyer said they'll keep us here
as long as they can...
till they make their case,
or unless somebody cops to it.
Keep your dick up.
Well, I... Leave that. Don't touch that,
my program's coming on.
John, love you, babe. Don't let me rot, now.
- Turns out I gotta work tonight.
- I see.
You see what?
You're so concerned about finances...
where do you think it comes from?
Be careful driving home.
There he is!
Here's to Newark's newest hotel.
Anything else with the Esplanade
I should know?
No.
It's the girls from Icelandic Air!
Come on in!
Hey, how are you?
All right, let me get the fuck out of here.
How's Junior?
- He's gonna be all right.
- Tell him he's in our prayers, etc.
I'll be sure to let him know.
One other thing, though.
John said he went to a cookout
at your house.
A don doesn't wear shorts.
All right, come on.
Elevator's here.
So where are you girls from?
Reykjavik.
You do and you'll clean it up.
- Christopher!
- Yeah!
Let's go!
What's up, T?
You have a good time tonight?
All right.
Learn anything?
Like what?
Anything.
You had a sit-down with two bosses.
You got a real hard-on for me,
that's all I know.
- You think so?
- It's fucking obvious.
Take the parkway.
You know, for all the things there are
to eat on this island...
breadfruit, mangoes, papayas,
not to mention the fish in the sea...
there's no question about us surviving.
We could go on here for years.
And I mean years.
Where are you going?
Get that.
Hello?
Who did?
They did?
I'll tell him.
Tell me what?
- That was Melvoin.
- So, it was Melvoin.
What the fuck is this, Mother May I?
Go ahead, tell me!
He just had a call from some source of his.
Dr. Schreck's office isn't safe to talk at.
The FBI had an undercover in there
since January.
Or D-day or something.
The agent's been pulled
to testify at your trial.
All right, pull up over there.
Who's that, Bobby Bacala?
See over there?
Guy in there killed your father.
What the fuck are you talking about?
Barry Haydu.
Detective Lieutenant
in the Clifton Police Force.
Retired today.
That's his retirement party.
Everybody always told me
it was a fucking cop.
I thought he was dead.
- My mother can't even talk about it.
- Did the hit for Jilly Ruffalo.
Him and your old man
were in the can together.
Jilly stabbed your old man's cellmate
to death.
So, when your old man got paroled,
he tracked down Jilly.
Took out his eye so bad,
he couldn't even put a glass one in.
Loyal, your old man.
That's what I heard.
Some guy's eye.
They hit my dad
right outside my house, right?
- He was bringing home a crib for me?
- Yeah.
Well, no...
He was outside the house,
but he wasn't carrying a crib.
He had a bunch of TV trays.
Could've been a crib just as easily.
That rat fuck was in uniform then.
Gambled like you wouldn't believe.
He did it on contract.
Made a lot of money over the years.
So, how come he's still fucking walking?
Because he's been useful.
But he's outlived it...
as of his cute little ceremony this afternoon.
Is that him?
With the sombrero on?
No, you can't tell from here.
Maybe...
Yeah, probably.
Here.
Nice house, apparently.
They say he paid cash for it.
Good luck.
Questions?
Kill the dome light.
Said, "Hey, Joe"
That's the lamest plan I ever heard.
It is not a lame plan,
we got it all worked out.
And we got the time to place everything.
It's lame.
Magnum, why are you being
so negative and hostile?
Higgins, he's one of the biggest
drug dealers in the Midwest...
and he's as dangerous as Quenneville...
What the fuck is this?
You're cleaned out.
Nothing to rob in this place.
Well, there's this.
Okay.
You know I'm a police officer.
Engraving on this watch
says you retired today.
Every little bit helps.
Rough divorce?
She must be a real vile twat.
Hope she didn't pass it on to your daughter.
Listen to me.
It's not too late to cut your losses.
Unlock me, give me the weapons.
I promise you I will do
whatever is in my power to help you.
Maybe. Let's come back to that.
You remember Dickie Moltisanti?
- No.
- No?
Is that what you said?
- Is he a friend of yours?
- He was my father.
Steak san, Newport fries?
Scrambled eggs, no oil, tomato slices.
So, are you...
mentally prepared for this promotion?
Yeah.
How's that steak?
It's okay.
Hon? Another steak san over here.
- Rare.
- Coming up.
You know, because it's...
It's a lot of added responsibility.
I think it should've happened sooner.
How's your family doing, you know...
since the tragedy with your dad?
Rough on my mother.
How old is she now?
She's 69.
Mom really went downhill
after the World Trade Center.
You know, Quasimodo predicted all this.
Who did what?
These problems.
The Middle East, the end of the world.
Nostradamus.
Quasimodo's the Hunchback of Notre Dame.
Right.
Notre Damus.
Nostradamus, and Notre Dame.
It's two different things completely.
It's interesting, though,
they'd be so similar, isn't it?
And I always thought,
"Okay, Hunchback of Notre Dame.
"You also got your quarterback
and halfback of Notre Dame."
One's a fucking cathedral.
Obviously. I know, I'm just saying.
It's interesting, the coincidence.
What, you gonna tell me
you never pondered that?
- The back thing with Notre Dame?
- No!
Look, I don't know who told you I had
anything to do with your father's death...
but their information is faulty...
or they are deliberately
not telling you the truth.
Are you inferring that
you didn't take cash from Jilly Ruffalo...
to whack my father while he was carrying
a TV tray for me to watch TV?
I don't know anybody named Ruffalo.
You're being set up!
He's lying to you, whoever he is.
It wouldn't make any difference.
What do you mean,
it wouldn't make any difference?
He wants you dead.
All right, look. I got a boat.
It's a Sea Ray 230. It's almost brand new.
I didn't kill your father, but you could...
You don't want a cop-kill on your head!
... and what if they won't pull over, T.C.?
I'm not gonna take on a limo in this car.
- No problem.
- I'm sorry!
- What are you gonna do?
- Honk the horn.
Pull over! Police!
Police, in a Ferrari?
Freeze! Don't move a muscle,
or I'll put a bullet through it.
Special Investigator Finaday,
you're under arrest.
What's the charge, Officer?
Speeding, reckless driving,
endangering another vehicle...
and impersonating an officer.
- How do you think it's going?
- Couldn't be better, you two are terrific.
Soon as they come through the door,
we're gonna nail them.
Freeze!
Shit.
I missed my game, again.
Fucking loser.
Now Reese'll have to lead
the guys to victory.
- Who's Reese?
- Kenneth Reese!
He was my back-up quarterback
at the academy...
and he's been waiting
for a chance like this since 1963.
Now he's got it because of you.
... more than 12 hours. Ted?
Amy, in Pennsylvania tonight,
two men were shot and killed...
in what was described as a brazen
but successful armored-car robbery.
Three accomplices escaped with $800,000...
while one of the dead men,
Dennis Lynch of Freehold, New Jersey...
was said by police to have ties
to organized crime families...
both in that city and in New York.
The street where the robbery took place...
was littered with bills
of denominations from...
- You smell gas down here?
- It's always like that.
You had the pipes checked?
I thought I heard something.
Is he up? I need to talk to him.
I brought him a steak.
You can put it with eggs.
Actually, your wife's here.
She's making him something to eat.
Karen. Did something happen?
We got some bad news last night.
Are you just gonna stand there?
The Feds had an undercover agent
in Dr. Schreck's office.
Uncle Jun'.
- Hey, Karen.
- Fucking Grand Central Station?
Junior, my kids?
You're right. Sorry, dear.
I brought my bar of soap.
What time they call you?
We had a little scare.
Thought it was the shunt in his heart.
He passed some gas, and he seems better.
Why don't you go on Joe Franklin,
tell the whole tri-state area?
Dad.
Not now.
I heard what happened.
It's bad, but it's not worth
getting yourself sick over.
- I told you, just sit down.
- He doesn't have cable.
Actually, we're gonna go.
Okay, Jun', you got everything?
Thank you, dear, you've been wonderful.
Bye, Karen.
I'll see you. See you, kids.
- Goodbye, Karen.
- Be good.
Must've been that piece of tail.
Now, look, she...
She probably reported the meetings...
who was there, all that shit.
As far as conversations,
what could she hear?
You'd better hope nothing...
because you were involved
in every fucking one.
How could you fall for that flirty shit?
That's the point!
Get the hell outta here.
I wanna talk to my uncle.
Forget about that for a minute.
That shit about your legal expenses.
I been thinking, and okay.
Maybe I can give you some relief.
What?
You got that empty garage
over on Frelinghuysen Avenue.
You been trying to sell it.
I'll take it off your hands.
- What are you gonna do with it?
- I don't know, I'm trying to help you out.
How much?
$100,000.
Who gives a fuck anyway?
- Come on.
- I was led around by the nose, Anthony.
You're right. A young cooze smiled at me,
and birds started chirping.
Time was, my instincts would've never
failed me like that.
So, what are you now, the Amazing Kreskin?
What did I tell her?
Did I say anything
could be used against me?
I don't know.
Bullshitting, singing.
Atlantic City, Jesus Christ.
I'll be sitting right across from her
in the courtroom.
All right, come on. Have something to eat.
I'm an old man, Anthony.
An old man that's going to trial.
Not much else to say about me.
I'm a little depressed.
You were on vacation.
Can you describe the feelings?
Things are good.
Especially with Carmela.
But then she starts ragging on me
about the future.
How she's worried.
And what's gonna happen to them
if I'm dead.
And "buy bonds" and all this shit.
A lot of people are feeling vulnerable.
On the other hand, she's right.
- Not that I'd ever tell her that.
- Why not?
'Cause then she'd wanna know
where's the money, how much.
Don't you want Carmela to be taken care of?
She is.
Anyway, she's right, that's the point.
Over the last few years,
I've been doing a lot of thinking.
And?
My uncle definitely snapped it into focus.
What's he, 72 years old? What's he got?
Fucking shitty house in Belleville,
and a bunch of legal bills...
that'd make you gargle Drano
if you had them.
I've analyzed it.
There's two endings for a guy like me.
High-profile guy.
Dead, or in the can.
- Big percent of the time.
- You've never talked this frankly.
Even with all this terrorism shit,
the government has resources up the ass.
- As far as legal bills are...
- Anthony!
- What?
- Why don't you give it up?
You didn't let me finish.
There's a third way to wrap it up.
You rely only on family.
Not many men could survive
without the love and support...
of their wife and children.
No, I'm talking about business.
You trust only blood.
A friend of mine...
guy whose name you wouldn't know...
stayed out of the can and in charge.
Lived in Florida till he was 81 years old.
He only gave orders through his son.
No other conversations
that could come back in testimony.
- His son?
- No, not A.J.
What I've been dealt is my nephew.
He's gotten his act together, the kid.
Over the last few months...
I started the process
of bonding him to me inseparably.
How?
That we can't get into.
Didn't your uncle do that with you?
You said his life is like a desert.
I'm 42, and I'm already more successful
than my uncle ever was.
You've seen my house.
Anthony, why are you telling me this?
I don't know.
Guess I trust you.
A little.
Hi, Mom.
What the hell are you doing here?
You scared me to death.
Just stopped by
to see how you're getting along.
You ever do anything like a normal person?
There is a bell.
How you been?
Fine.
How's Connie's kid?
He's huge.
Jesus!
That's Jason?
He has a weight problem already.
Eight years old.
She never had him baptized.
She thought she knew everything.
Actually, I was hoping you would make me
one of your fluffernutters.
It's fucking mouthwash.
Leave me the fuck alone.
You come over here with that shit.
What's that on the table,
Daddy's navy picture?
You ever miss him?
When he was in prison...
or since he's been dead?
I don't know.
Did I saddle you with a stepfather?
I don't have any peanut butter.
I haven't kept it since you left.
I can't make you a fluffernutter.
You want French toast?
I gotta go.
- Ade sends her love.
- Right, say hello.
You watch that Bailey's,
or I'll give you a shot in the head.
- Look who's talking.
- What?
Never mind what.
"that the country's high court had ruled
that influence peddling is not a crime.
"Said Franco Ferrarotti,
an Italian sociologist:
"'Essentially, the judges are saying
what everybody believes.'
"He was referring to raccomendazione...
"the Italian custom of seeking
special treatment from people in power.
"'This is our version of the Protestant ethic,'
Mr. Ferrarotti said.
"The case concerned a clerk of a civil court
in Potenza...
"who was jailed for promising
to speed up someone's trial.
"Evidence showed that
he received 88 pounds of fish...
"in return for his assistance."
Hello.
Yeah, she's here.
She's on duty today.
The same, undercover.
Yeah, let me have her call you back.
Deb, it was your mom.
You're complaining about
your paper on ethnicity.
Here's some interesting stuff
from your own background.
We're from Potenza?
I thought we were
Napoli-Daboli or whatever.
Neapolitan. But this
is about Italy as a whole.
Did the squirrels eat the bread I put out
for the ducks, or somebody sweep it up?
I do know that Meadow stepped
in some soggy bread with her bare feet.
You should've heard it.
What's that?
This is the New York Times that your friend
here has delivered to him at school...
for his Social Studies requirement,
then he doesn't read them.
- I find them piled in his room.
- Make a go of it at that new school.
You got no idea
what we did to get you in there.
There is no reason you shouldn't
be able to pass Social Studies.
You passing Social Studies?
You just revealed your own ignorance.
It's only been five days.
We didn't get grades yet.
I what? I revealed my own what?
Look at that.
Now, he's reading.
- Hey, everybody.
- Where's Furio?
How you doing, Ton'?
A.J., finish getting dressed.
- You want some coffee?
- No.
- Has Furio got that bug again?
- Tony likes to mix it up, you know.
Different cars.
What, the Caprice?
No, he's turning off.
Take me to my uncle's doctor.
Furio called me.
He's going to the fucking track today.
- So what about it?
- I don't know.
I'm driving again, all of a sudden.
So what? I gotta explain
why I want you with me this week?
- God forbid you'd explain.
- That's right.
- Now you're gonna get fresh about it?
- I'm just saying, I mean, I'm glad to do it.
I'm glad you're glad.
You know, your father was
like a mentor to me.
- Right.
- A standup.
You ask anybody.
Your old man was a legend.
He single-handedly hunted down
that New England crew.
Brought the war home to them up there.
Another Chevy.
Nuns.
Might be undercover Feds, but I doubt it.
He must be colicky.
I think he likes your hair better that way.
Mr. Soprano.
There she is.
- You be good now, don't start.
- You ought to see my finish.
You get sued for talk like that nowadays.
Then cancel my appointment.
Let me die now.
If a man can't voice to a beautiful woman...
the zephyrs that are blowing
through his mind...
God, listen to him today.
Go in there now,
and strip down to your shorts.
You see now? I'm not gonna touch that line.
Too much class.
- But as for that lovely laugh line...
- Come on, handsome, we're busy.
Give me that cheek, right here.
- I surrender, do with me what you will.
- Okay.
The doctor will be with you both.
So, what'd you wanna see me about?
- My trial starts a week from Tuesday.
- You'll beat it.
- Melvoin's good.
- We have to change our arrangement.
Which arrangement is that?
These fucking lawyers
are taking my internal organs.
$1 million for this trial,
Melvoin and Hirshorn are charging.
And that was bad enough.
Now they put this Harvard kid on,
this lackey.
I don't know what the fuck he does.
And then they just decided
we needed audibility experts to testify...
you can't definitively state what people
are saying on the government tapes.
I could fucking tell them that.
Those guys,
they got sound graphs and shit.
$50,000, the cocksuckers are charging.
Plus the minimization expert,
plus the fucking monthly expenses.
Fucking lexis fees, the Xeroxing.
An entire Northwest forest
must've given its life in Xerox paper...
for this one fucking trial.
I said to Mel,
"Can't we just at one fucking meeting...
"all read from the same sheet of paper,
pass it around?"
Our split stays the same.
You kept me in place as boss
to take the heat off you.
My legal problems have let you
go around like a gabavreche...
- two fucking years now.
- There you go.
Ten points.
I got medical bills, too, Anthony.
I got cash flow problems of my own.
A one-time hit, $50,000, $75,000
to cover the audibility expert.
I got two kids in private schools.
Goddamn it!
Get your shy running right.
That's what you should be focused on.
Would you like to try some kielbasa?
Kentshire farms. Nitrate-free.
I mean, don't get me wrong.
I like Versace's dinnerware...
but stamping your face
on every plate... The ego!
Look who's here.
My God, what are you doing home?
- I got to get this out to my car.
- Is that for us?
You're in a good mood.
Want me to fix you a plate?
Will you shut that pocket rat up?
- You wanna say hello to Danielle?
- Not really.
- I should go, anyhow.
- Enjoy your wine.
- Don't listen to his bullshit.
- I got to get up early tomorrow.
- No matter how much the john offers you?
- Pig.
This is beautiful.
- Where'd you get it?
- You said you were gonna go. Go.
- I got to get some sleep.
- I should go.
Froze to death in that mall today.
They go crazy with the air-conditioning.
- So, when am I gonna see you again?
- I'll call you.
Okay, sweetie.
Some of those bags look like Gucci.
Yeah, he gets that stuff all the time.
His cousin's a liquidator.
- Bye.
- See you.
- You are so fucking rude.
- I had a horrible goddamn day.
She's over here all the time lately.
Tony still acting all mean?
- Cosette, quiet.
- Fucking asshole.
Ever since I questioned his judgment
on some RalphielJackie Junior problem.
Like he's fucking infallible.
Pope Tony XXlll or some shit.
And now, of course, he starts in with
my father so I can be compared all negative.
You never know, I could
be on the endangered species list.
Chrissy.
Gonna get high?
Maybe I'll just smoke some.
That's more addictive than shooting.
I don't do it every fucking day now,
like some people.
I'm just chipping, I got it under control.
Chrissy, Tony loves you.
Why would he have you made
if he didn't depend on you?
He can depend on me.
When the fuck have
I ever not been there 100 percent?
Want some?
Can I talk to you a minute?
Turn this off?
Turn it down.
I'm worried, Tony.
- About my weight?
- About money.
You're getting a little less allowance
than usual. I told you, it's temporary.
Super Bowl last year,
we didn't lay enough off.
No, it's not just that.
I'm worried about you, about the future...
about me and the kids,
if something happens to you.
- I don't provide for you?
- Now.
I saw Angie Bonpensiero today.
She was handing out
free Polish sausage at the supermarket.
Don't start. I supported her.
You're so worried about the money.
Who is gonna support
your children and me...
if, God forbid, something happens to you?
That's the point. Sil? Paulie?
- That is frightening.
- You'll be taken care of.
You're set in perpetuity.
There's money in overseas accounts.
I don't have the serial numbers.
You'll have them when the time comes.
Not now.
For your own benefit.
So you're not an accomplice.
Jesus Christ, I been busting
my pick all day long...
to bring home the money
you're so concerned about.
I thought maybe I could have a sundae
and zone out in front of the frigging TV.
Because, A: You're right,
my job is extremely stressful...
I am talking about some
simple estate planning, Tony, that's all.
My cousin, Brian Cammarata, has helped
lots of people set up trusts for their kids...
- begin asset allocation...
- I got to spell this out for you?
I can't declare X amount of my income.
Your consulting fees
from Barone Sanitation you do.
We file a tax return
to justify the house, the cars.
We could put aside some of that
to start a portfolio.
Stocks?
You gotta be high in the
corporate structure to make that work.
We don't have
those Enron-type connections.
Bonds, then.
There are these things called "REITs"
Brian told me about.
Bonds, where's the capital for that?
In the Caymans or under the mattress...
or wherever you put it at zero growth.
The money stays put.
With what's going on globally...
- There's always some excuse.
- There's no cash in this house.
Not since our last bust.
Check the vents.
- And I provide for my children.
- Yes, Tony, you do.
But I don't know how you do it,
because you won't tell me.
Let me tell you something,
or you can watch the fucking news:
Everything comes to an end.
Good morning, Ton'.
- They over there?
- I was able to reach everybody.
What the fuck are you doing?
- What?
- You're wasting fucking ice.
- It's mostly melted.
- You're fucking arguing with me now?
No, Ton'.
You don't see the monthly statements.
We're hemorrhaging money out of here.
No, you're right, I don't.
- Think that shit grows on trees?
- Ice? No, I don't.
- Are you getting cute with me?
- No.
I think you are.
You're getting a fucking attitude on you.
I'm not.
- Ice, when it hangs around...
- Georgie, be quiet.
But it gets watery. It dilutes the drinks...
- especially Scotch.
- Jesus Christ.
Here, throw it all away.
Waste it all, fucking John D. Rockefeller!
Waste it all!
Conserve.
Where were you?
I wanna know why there's zero growth
in this family's receipts.
Where's the fucking money?
You're supposed to be earners.
That's why you got the top-tier positions.
So, everyone, go out to your people
on the street, crack some heads.
Create some fucking earners out there.
The guy...
We talked about this,
over at the other place with the guy.
The councilman.
What the fuck happened to that?
- It petered out.
- "It petered out."
- It died on the vine.
- "It died on the vine."
It died on the vine.
The guy, he moved or something.
Nobody knows
what the fuck I'm talking about!
We hear you.
My uncle...
the boss of this family...
is on trial for his life.
And what you people are
kicking up to him is a fucking disgrace.
You know how much lawyers cost?
A major RICO like his,
I'm the only one supporting him.
This thing is a pyramid,
since time immemorial.
Shit runs downhill, money goes up.
It's that simple.
I should not have to be coming here...
hat in my hand...
reminding you about your duty to that man.
And I don't wanna hear about
the fucking economy either!
Sil, break it down for them.
What two businesses have traditionally
been recession proof...
since time immemorial?
Certain aspects of show business,
and our thing.
Now, that's it, that's all I got to say.
Frankly, I'm depressed and ashamed.
Is that what your coach laid out for you
as a training breakfast?
The shelf in the garage is still loose.
You went down in the garage?
I'm gonna go check it out.
You said you'd wake up early,
come to church with me...
then go online and register for your classes.
I'll miss Grandma and Grandpa at dinner.
There's a back-to-school party for Hadley.
These boring Sunday dinners.
Can one of my new friends eat over?
Aunt Ro and Uncle Ralph will be here, too,
but I'm sure we can fit.
- You're not gonna lay out, Dad?
- It's too cold.
Ralphie and Ro are coming out here today?
I thought we got that straightened out
months ago.
And it's not "Uncle Ralph."
I asked you about inviting them
the other night, and you said...
I must've been focused on something else.
It's Ro's birthday, and she's very down.
Anthony.
I ever tell you about the time I had a Harley?
- Whoa, cool.
- '74 Shovelhead.
- I could blow off Porsches on that thing.
- Not my dad's Boxster.
- What's your name?
- Matt.
Matt, no offense, but your dad's
Boxster is a Porsche with panties.
He knows what I'm saying.
I mean, that's for the Hamptons, the Boxster.
I'm talking Turbo Carrera.
One time, I'm alongside this Turbo
with doctor plates.
We come off the line,
he's got this big Jew grin.
You're not Jewish are you?
- Half.
- Anyway, he knows it's all in fun.
At the Passaic Avenue
and New Dutch Lane intersection...
we're doing 110. Boom!
Right through the light.
He wasn't grinning then, boy.
I look back. He's white as false teeth.
Jason Mingelli's parents
let him get a YZ-250.
You get on that bike, I will cut
your legs off before the bike does.
- I had the high handlebars, you know.
- Bruce Dern, don't you have to go?
I got to hit the little boy's room.
You guys need some help?
In my day, there was a motorcycle
called the Vincent Black Shadow.
- Boy, did that thing take off.
- The hoods all drove those.
They beat you up that time,
you remember, on City Island?
He'd just gotten out of the Navy.
I think he weighed 105 pounds.
Did you see any action
in World War II, Hugh?
A little bit. I was stationed in Nova Scotia.
But I caught diverticulitis.
It's the weight loss she's talking about.
Oh, my God, you're eating, I'm so sorry.
- Don't worry about it, come in.
- You want something?
No, my God, thank you.
I just came over to borrow the samovar
for my cousin's baby shower.
This is my friend, Danielle Ciccolella.
This is Christopher's cousin Tony.
- Tony.
- How you doing?
His cousin Carmela.
- This is a beautiful home.
- Thank you.
Where you from, Danielle?
- Whippany.
- Want some anisette?
No, thanks.
This thing needs polishing.
- There's a bathroom downstairs.
- It's me, Janice.
- There's a bathroom downstairs.
- I know.
What?
- What are you doing?
- Nothing.
Come on.
I knew it.
Go ahead, you can do that.
How's Ro doing down there?
Very quiet, you know, it's to be expected.
They got her on medication.
I don't think it's helping.
"Ah, Bartleby! Ah, humanity!"
Danielle, did you see the loggia?
That loggia was my daughter's idea.
Nice?
Danielle, come check this out.
Come on.
What are you doing to me here?
I was stationed in Nova Scotia.
Well, I told you that.
Anyway, there was nothing for them
to do in Nova Scotia.
Great seafood, but other than that...
That's a lot of cracked corn.
All the ducks,
they've flown south for the winter.
So? I'll be ready for next season.
Thanks.
Red Suburban. I'll be over at Italianissimo.
Good news about the Esplanade.
The legislature's voted to refund the
special Newark development district...
along Frelinghuysen Avenue,
north from the Museum of Trucking.
Because of the vote, Omni is gonna
put up a hotel with a galleria...
on the first floor.
Word came down yesterday.
A galleria?
Fifty stores selling
sneakers and turnip greens.
It's a demographic imperative.
Hoboken's maxed out.
Your Prada people are already
moving to Down Neck.
Where are they gonna go next?
My old man had a piece of
the garbage transfer station...
in Lower Manhattan, back in the '70s.
People told him:
"Start buying up
the abandoned buildings around here."
- But he couldn't see it.
- And now it's TriBeCa.
I tell you, Tony...
I'm borrowing money myself to grab up
parcels along Frelinghuysen Ave...
through a shell company.
And a private citizen like you?
Who's gonna quibble
with patriotic entrepreneurism?
My uncle has property
down on Frelinghuysen.
Mr. Soprano.
I remember you
You're the one that
made my dreams come true
a few kisses ago
Oh, boy.
I'm gonna be busy the next couple months.
But after that, what would you say...
me and you...
una bella giornata, to that
city called Atlantic?
I have many dear friends there.
I could show you quite a time.
- Thank you, but I don't gamble.
- With me, it's never a gamble.
You know, today is my last day.
- Where you going?
- Back to school.
Anyway, I'll come say goodbye
when you're done here.
Excuse me.
All the fucking luck.
So, what is it today?
It's becoming clear to me...
Murf can't run my operations
while I'm in court.
He's starting to forget things. His words...
Sometimes there's food on the
front of his shirt, the poor bastard.
I'm gonna move Bobby up.
- I think it's a good choice.
- I wasn't asking, I'm telling.
- So you know who to talk to.
- Bobby know yet?
I think we should bring him in here.
He's gonna be a very happy man.
- Thought you were at the beauty parlor.
- I'm going to get the last of the tomatoes.
- Yeah, they were good last night.
- A little late in the season for ducks, no?
Not necessarily. The ones from
upper Canada, this is the south to them.
- Speak.
- I have a collect call for Mr. Walters.
Okay, operator.
John?
Right on time.
That's all I got, pal, time.
What the fuck happened out there?
Didn't Tony tell you? Sil?
They mentioned in passing that you were
doing the county book in Youngstown.
Didn't have long to talk.
Hello?
Let me first say,
I can't tell you how touched I was...
when my nephew told me
you wanted me to call.
Anthony only talks to me
through middlemen.
- So, what did they pinch you for?
- Gun charge.
I drove out to visit Lenny Scotise.
Don't know if you know Lenny.
- Him and I used to have that little club...
- Doesn't matter.
Anyway, my first night here...
we drive out to visit
Dean Martin's birthplace in Steubenville.
Cops pull us over for no left blinker.
Long story short,
they find a piece under the seat.
Fucking.38.
Turns out it was used in an unsolved
murder out here from eight years ago.
- Jesus.
- Yeah.
So what can I do to help?
You're too much. Nothing.
The lawyer said they'll keep us here
as long as they can...
till they make their case,
or unless somebody cops to it.
Keep your dick up.
Well, I... Leave that. Don't touch that,
my program's coming on.
John, love you, babe. Don't let me rot, now.
- Turns out I gotta work tonight.
- I see.
You see what?
You're so concerned about finances...
where do you think it comes from?
Be careful driving home.
There he is!
Here's to Newark's newest hotel.
Anything else with the Esplanade
I should know?
No.
It's the girls from Icelandic Air!
Come on in!
Hey, how are you?
All right, let me get the fuck out of here.
How's Junior?
- He's gonna be all right.
- Tell him he's in our prayers, etc.
I'll be sure to let him know.
One other thing, though.
John said he went to a cookout
at your house.
A don doesn't wear shorts.
All right, come on.
Elevator's here.
So where are you girls from?
Reykjavik.
You do and you'll clean it up.
- Christopher!
- Yeah!
Let's go!
What's up, T?
You have a good time tonight?
All right.
Learn anything?
Like what?
Anything.
You had a sit-down with two bosses.
You got a real hard-on for me,
that's all I know.
- You think so?
- It's fucking obvious.
Take the parkway.
You know, for all the things there are
to eat on this island...
breadfruit, mangoes, papayas,
not to mention the fish in the sea...
there's no question about us surviving.
We could go on here for years.
And I mean years.
Where are you going?
Get that.
Hello?
Who did?
They did?
I'll tell him.
Tell me what?
- That was Melvoin.
- So, it was Melvoin.
What the fuck is this, Mother May I?
Go ahead, tell me!
He just had a call from some source of his.
Dr. Schreck's office isn't safe to talk at.
The FBI had an undercover in there
since January.
Or D-day or something.
The agent's been pulled
to testify at your trial.
All right, pull up over there.
Who's that, Bobby Bacala?
See over there?
Guy in there killed your father.
What the fuck are you talking about?
Barry Haydu.
Detective Lieutenant
in the Clifton Police Force.
Retired today.
That's his retirement party.
Everybody always told me
it was a fucking cop.
I thought he was dead.
- My mother can't even talk about it.
- Did the hit for Jilly Ruffalo.
Him and your old man
were in the can together.
Jilly stabbed your old man's cellmate
to death.
So, when your old man got paroled,
he tracked down Jilly.
Took out his eye so bad,
he couldn't even put a glass one in.
Loyal, your old man.
That's what I heard.
Some guy's eye.
They hit my dad
right outside my house, right?
- He was bringing home a crib for me?
- Yeah.
Well, no...
He was outside the house,
but he wasn't carrying a crib.
He had a bunch of TV trays.
Could've been a crib just as easily.
That rat fuck was in uniform then.
Gambled like you wouldn't believe.
He did it on contract.
Made a lot of money over the years.
So, how come he's still fucking walking?
Because he's been useful.
But he's outlived it...
as of his cute little ceremony this afternoon.
Is that him?
With the sombrero on?
No, you can't tell from here.
Maybe...
Yeah, probably.
Here.
Nice house, apparently.
They say he paid cash for it.
Good luck.
Questions?
Kill the dome light.
Said, "Hey, Joe"
That's the lamest plan I ever heard.
It is not a lame plan,
we got it all worked out.
And we got the time to place everything.
It's lame.
Magnum, why are you being
so negative and hostile?
Higgins, he's one of the biggest
drug dealers in the Midwest...
and he's as dangerous as Quenneville...
What the fuck is this?
You're cleaned out.
Nothing to rob in this place.
Well, there's this.
Okay.
You know I'm a police officer.
Engraving on this watch
says you retired today.
Every little bit helps.
Rough divorce?
She must be a real vile twat.
Hope she didn't pass it on to your daughter.
Listen to me.
It's not too late to cut your losses.
Unlock me, give me the weapons.
I promise you I will do
whatever is in my power to help you.
Maybe. Let's come back to that.
You remember Dickie Moltisanti?
- No.
- No?
Is that what you said?
- Is he a friend of yours?
- He was my father.
Steak san, Newport fries?
Scrambled eggs, no oil, tomato slices.
So, are you...
mentally prepared for this promotion?
Yeah.
How's that steak?
It's okay.
Hon? Another steak san over here.
- Rare.
- Coming up.
You know, because it's...
It's a lot of added responsibility.
I think it should've happened sooner.
How's your family doing, you know...
since the tragedy with your dad?
Rough on my mother.
How old is she now?
She's 69.
Mom really went downhill
after the World Trade Center.
You know, Quasimodo predicted all this.
Who did what?
These problems.
The Middle East, the end of the world.
Nostradamus.
Quasimodo's the Hunchback of Notre Dame.
Right.
Notre Damus.
Nostradamus, and Notre Dame.
It's two different things completely.
It's interesting, though,
they'd be so similar, isn't it?
And I always thought,
"Okay, Hunchback of Notre Dame.
"You also got your quarterback
and halfback of Notre Dame."
One's a fucking cathedral.
Obviously. I know, I'm just saying.
It's interesting, the coincidence.
What, you gonna tell me
you never pondered that?
- The back thing with Notre Dame?
- No!
Look, I don't know who told you I had
anything to do with your father's death...
but their information is faulty...
or they are deliberately
not telling you the truth.
Are you inferring that
you didn't take cash from Jilly Ruffalo...
to whack my father while he was carrying
a TV tray for me to watch TV?
I don't know anybody named Ruffalo.
You're being set up!
He's lying to you, whoever he is.
It wouldn't make any difference.
What do you mean,
it wouldn't make any difference?
He wants you dead.
All right, look. I got a boat.
It's a Sea Ray 230. It's almost brand new.
I didn't kill your father, but you could...
You don't want a cop-kill on your head!
... and what if they won't pull over, T.C.?
I'm not gonna take on a limo in this car.
- No problem.
- I'm sorry!
- What are you gonna do?
- Honk the horn.
Pull over! Police!
Police, in a Ferrari?
Freeze! Don't move a muscle,
or I'll put a bullet through it.
Special Investigator Finaday,
you're under arrest.
What's the charge, Officer?
Speeding, reckless driving,
endangering another vehicle...
and impersonating an officer.
- How do you think it's going?
- Couldn't be better, you two are terrific.
Soon as they come through the door,
we're gonna nail them.
Freeze!
Shit.
I missed my game, again.
Fucking loser.
Now Reese'll have to lead
the guys to victory.
- Who's Reese?
- Kenneth Reese!
He was my back-up quarterback
at the academy...
and he's been waiting
for a chance like this since 1963.
Now he's got it because of you.
... more than 12 hours. Ted?
Amy, in Pennsylvania tonight,
two men were shot and killed...
in what was described as a brazen
but successful armored-car robbery.
Three accomplices escaped with $800,000...
while one of the dead men,
Dennis Lynch of Freehold, New Jersey...
was said by police to have ties
to organized crime families...
both in that city and in New York.
The street where the robbery took place...
was littered with bills
of denominations from...
- You smell gas down here?
- It's always like that.
You had the pipes checked?
I thought I heard something.
Is he up? I need to talk to him.
I brought him a steak.
You can put it with eggs.
Actually, your wife's here.
She's making him something to eat.
Karen. Did something happen?
We got some bad news last night.
Are you just gonna stand there?
The Feds had an undercover agent
in Dr. Schreck's office.
Uncle Jun'.
- Hey, Karen.
- Fucking Grand Central Station?
Junior, my kids?
You're right. Sorry, dear.
I brought my bar of soap.
What time they call you?
We had a little scare.
Thought it was the shunt in his heart.
He passed some gas, and he seems better.
Why don't you go on Joe Franklin,
tell the whole tri-state area?
Dad.
Not now.
I heard what happened.
It's bad, but it's not worth
getting yourself sick over.
- I told you, just sit down.
- He doesn't have cable.
Actually, we're gonna go.
Okay, Jun', you got everything?
Thank you, dear, you've been wonderful.
Bye, Karen.
I'll see you. See you, kids.
- Goodbye, Karen.
- Be good.
Must've been that piece of tail.
Now, look, she...
She probably reported the meetings...
who was there, all that shit.
As far as conversations,
what could she hear?
You'd better hope nothing...
because you were involved
in every fucking one.
How could you fall for that flirty shit?
That's the point!
Get the hell outta here.
I wanna talk to my uncle.
Forget about that for a minute.
That shit about your legal expenses.
I been thinking, and okay.
Maybe I can give you some relief.
What?
You got that empty garage
over on Frelinghuysen Avenue.
You been trying to sell it.
I'll take it off your hands.
- What are you gonna do with it?
- I don't know, I'm trying to help you out.
How much?
$100,000.
Who gives a fuck anyway?
- Come on.
- I was led around by the nose, Anthony.
You're right. A young cooze smiled at me,
and birds started chirping.
Time was, my instincts would've never
failed me like that.
So, what are you now, the Amazing Kreskin?
What did I tell her?
Did I say anything
could be used against me?
I don't know.
Bullshitting, singing.
Atlantic City, Jesus Christ.
I'll be sitting right across from her
in the courtroom.
All right, come on. Have something to eat.
I'm an old man, Anthony.
An old man that's going to trial.
Not much else to say about me.
I'm a little depressed.
You were on vacation.
Can you describe the feelings?
Things are good.
Especially with Carmela.
But then she starts ragging on me
about the future.
How she's worried.
And what's gonna happen to them
if I'm dead.
And "buy bonds" and all this shit.
A lot of people are feeling vulnerable.
On the other hand, she's right.
- Not that I'd ever tell her that.
- Why not?
'Cause then she'd wanna know
where's the money, how much.
Don't you want Carmela to be taken care of?
She is.
Anyway, she's right, that's the point.
Over the last few years,
I've been doing a lot of thinking.
And?
My uncle definitely snapped it into focus.
What's he, 72 years old? What's he got?
Fucking shitty house in Belleville,
and a bunch of legal bills...
that'd make you gargle Drano
if you had them.
I've analyzed it.
There's two endings for a guy like me.
High-profile guy.
Dead, or in the can.
- Big percent of the time.
- You've never talked this frankly.
Even with all this terrorism shit,
the government has resources up the ass.
- As far as legal bills are...
- Anthony!
- What?
- Why don't you give it up?
You didn't let me finish.
There's a third way to wrap it up.
You rely only on family.
Not many men could survive
without the love and support...
of their wife and children.
No, I'm talking about business.
You trust only blood.
A friend of mine...
guy whose name you wouldn't know...
stayed out of the can and in charge.
Lived in Florida till he was 81 years old.
He only gave orders through his son.
No other conversations
that could come back in testimony.
- His son?
- No, not A.J.
What I've been dealt is my nephew.
He's gotten his act together, the kid.
Over the last few months...
I started the process
of bonding him to me inseparably.
How?
That we can't get into.
Didn't your uncle do that with you?
You said his life is like a desert.
I'm 42, and I'm already more successful
than my uncle ever was.
You've seen my house.
Anthony, why are you telling me this?
I don't know.
Guess I trust you.
A little.
Hi, Mom.
What the hell are you doing here?
You scared me to death.
Just stopped by
to see how you're getting along.
You ever do anything like a normal person?
There is a bell.
How you been?
Fine.
How's Connie's kid?
He's huge.
Jesus!
That's Jason?
He has a weight problem already.
Eight years old.
She never had him baptized.
She thought she knew everything.
Actually, I was hoping you would make me
one of your fluffernutters.
It's fucking mouthwash.
Leave me the fuck alone.
You come over here with that shit.
What's that on the table,
Daddy's navy picture?
You ever miss him?
When he was in prison...
or since he's been dead?
I don't know.
Did I saddle you with a stepfather?
I don't have any peanut butter.
I haven't kept it since you left.
I can't make you a fluffernutter.
You want French toast?
I gotta go.
- Ade sends her love.
- Right, say hello.
You watch that Bailey's,
or I'll give you a shot in the head.
- Look who's talking.
- What?
Never mind what.