The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (2010–…): Season 7, Episode 3 - Going Commando - full transcript
Kyle and Lisa Rinna cross paths in New York City while traveling with their daughters. Back in Beverly Hills, Lisa Vanderpump surprises Ken with a $25,000 watch on his birthday and Eileen ...
- Previously on "The Real
Housewives of Beverly Hills"...
- Can I welcome you
to Dorit's Buddha Lounge?
- Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God.
- I'm sorry for being
so hard on you.
- I never thought I'd actually
get an apology from Rinna.
Okay, let's move on. - Really?
- Yeah.
- This is now closure,
and we're moving forward.
- Alexia, Lisa is gonna be
in New York
when Sophia and I go next week.
But we could squeeze in dinner
and fun stuff.
- Yeah, we have
to squeeze in dinner.
- What no one knew was that you
lost your mom over the reunion.
- I know.
Losing my mother's affected
how I feel about Lisa Vanderpump
and everything that happened
because...
it's trivial.
Maybe I need to see somebody.
[upbeat music]
- The crown is heavy, darlings,
so just leave it
where it belongs.
- I may be two people,
but I'm not two-faced.
♪ ♪
- My advice to you:
don't hustle the hustler.
♪ ♪
- I speak no evil,
but I see and hear everything.
♪ ♪
- When you've
traveled the world,
you can speak
in any accent you want.
♪ ♪
- I'm an expert on luxury,
and I can always spot a fake.
♪ ♪
[electronic music]
♪ ♪
- Who wakes up at this time?
I don't even wake up this early
for work.
- Why isn't he here?
- I want eggs.
- I can't help you with that
right now.
- What do I do?
He's five minutes late.
[cell phone beeping]
- Amelia and I are flying
to New York City
to visit Delilah Belle
who is modeling,
going on castings
with her agents.
She recently modeled
for "Teen Vogue."
It's that moment where you go,
"I think she's gonna make it.
Like, it's gonna happen
for her."
[door closes]
Should I just run down there
and look at the gate?
It's just not normal.
- My mom is so annoying.
I can't handle all that.
- Maybe it's a menopause thing.
They just, like...
[laughs]
- I think it's just genetic.
[both laugh]
That was, like,
going a little far.
- It's here.
- It's here?
Okay, let's go.
Why don't you follow me?
Now, it's steep right here.
- Oh, God.
- We're going to LAX.
- Right.
- Okay, get in.
[trunk closes]
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Hi, sweetie, how are you?
- We are in a penthouse
on the Lower East Side.
I'm looking at
a gorgeous Manhattan right now.
It is so beautiful.
- I love you guys.
Have fun.
- Okay, honey, love you.
- This is really high up.
I don't like it.
- I travel to New York City
quite often.
I try to bring my girls
each time.
This time it is Sophia's turn.
Have some food.
It's actually good.
- I Don't want that.
It looks so gross.
- I would say,
of my four daughters,
Sophia is the most like me.
Have... have some fruit.
Have some berries.
- Mom, you kno...
You know that I hate fruit.
You bring me fruit
every single morning,
and every single time,
I tell you I don't like it,
and I never eat it.
I tell you this every morning.
Especially blueberries.
- [laughs] Sorry.
It's good for you.
She's very smart,
she's very funny,
and she loves
to give me a hard time.
I'm a cool mom, okay?
- I know you are.
- Let's get ready.
♪ ♪
- Where's the entrance?
- I think we go up these stairs.
I just cannot believe
that I have a child
that is 5'10".
I am 5'2"
and she really does
just kind of go like,
"Mm-hmm.
No, Mom, I'm not doing that."
- What are these buildings?
- Um, that's
the Empire State Building.
You wanna go up to the top?
- Nope.
- How scared would you be
to do that?
- I'm actually scared
of, like, everything.
- Sophia has anxiety like I do.
- Watch.
- F... ing hell, oh, my God.
Oh, my God. Why am I doing this?
I thought this was supposed
to be a relaxing vacation.
[bees buzzing]
Oh, my God, there's a bee.
I'm so sorry. I'm sorry.
But she also inherited,
you know, a lot of other
good things from me too.
At least we can laugh about it.
- True.
- Let's send Dad a picture.
He'll be so proud of us
that we're up here.
Smile.
We're sending this to dad.
- [chuckles]
[camera clicks]
[gasps]
Something touched my leg.
- A twig.
[laughing]
♪ ♪
- Hello?
- Hi.
- Hello, little man.
- Hi, darling.
- Ah, you look gorgeous in that.
Muah. - How you doing?
- So we're... we're going shopping
for something
for Ken's birthday,
and he's the most impossible
person to buy for on the planet.
- Really?
- Yeah.
Last year, you know,
I bought him two little ponies.
- Oh, my goodness me.
- Are they the most beautiful
things in the whole world?
- Oh, I'm just... I'm...
I'm blown away, actually.
- But those two little ponies...
- Well, they weren't really
for him. - Well, he loves them,
but maybe it wasn't quite
what he was expecting,
I would say. - [laughs]
- So it's either a watch
or a donkey.
[both laugh]
Dorit's got great taste,
she's a great friend,
so maybe she can help me
find something really fabulous
for Ken's birthday.
Bye, Jagger. - Love you, baby.
We'll see you in a little bit.
- Yeah, we won't be too long.
- No, we're gonna nail this.
- We'll come back
when all the money is gone.
- [laughs]
We're gonna find the best
possible present for him.
- It's just not gonna have
four legs.
- [laughs]
- Jump in.
- Whoo-hoo.
I love Lisa Vanderpump.
I mean, when I'm with her,
she brings out the humor,
the fun, the fabulousness,
the glam.
I mean, we're like
two peas in a pod.
Oh, my God,
that's, like, pepper spray.
- That is pepper spray.
Absolutely.
- Why do you have pepper spray?
- If Ken's getting
a bit amorous,
get out the pepper spray.
- [laughs]
[claps] - [chuckles]
[hip-hop music]
- We are late.
Let's get our asses in here.
- Hello.
- Finally.
Sorry, doll. Took me a minute.
- Busy, busy, girl.
- That's right.
- Welcome.
- Ooh.
I've got some shows coming up.
Denver, Vegas, and Greece.
Those are gonna be fun,
but what I'm really
most excited about
is this new video, "Expensive."
- The final four...
- Yay.
- That made it. [applause]
- I'm so glad
because it was tough,
but I knew exactly who I wanted
right away.
- You did.
- I found some hot bitches.
- Five, six, seven, eight.
[Erika Jayne's "Expensive"]
[indistinct rapping]
- 'Cause I don't give a f...
I mean, they have
high, tight asses.
High, tight boobs.
I mean, these dancers
are super sassy,
super... They deliver.
- So we've just been reviewing.
- Cool.
- So, um, why don't you
take a peak.
- ♪ Drop down ♪
♪ Expensive ♪
- Here we go!
- 'Cause I don't give a f...
[whip cracks]
♪ It's expensive to be me... ♪
Yes!
[all laugh]
- It's nice, huh?
- Yay!
- Hot, right?
- I think it's gonna be
a lot of fun,
which is what my music is
all about,
having fun, dancing, letting go,
releasing,
forgetting your troubles.
That's what Erika Jayne
is all about.
- We need to do a fitting
with you with Dani Michelle,
a tech scout, hair, nails,
wig consultations,
just, like, everything.
We've gotta add that all into
the schedule, Laia.
- My team and I work very hard,
but Erika Jayne is simply
an on-stage persona,
and she gets put to bed
when she's not on stage.
- Obviously, the video is, like,
uber important.
- We'll get it done.
- You know, 'cause I know you
have other things going on.
- [taps on table]
Listen, just one day at a time.
- Yeah. Cool.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Oh, my God, we're gonna find
the best present ever.
- Hi.
- Welcome to Hublot.
[overlapping greetings]
- Care if he sits up here?
- Of course.
- Is that okay?
[dog sneezes] - Oh, good...
- Oh... [both laughing]
- Sorry about that.
- Is it okay if he sneezes
all over your counter?
- Here, I'll grab some tissues.
- Oh, Lisa.
- No, no, Lisa, don't... no.
- That's okay.
- I'll grab some tissues.
- You have to appreciate
that she loves her dog
for her to be wiping
Harrison's snot
with her couture dress. [laughs]
- Okay, I can actually
use him to...
- I was gonna say,
you're using him.
- Now if I stuck a pole
up his ass,
I could probably do the floor
as well.
I remember there was something
like a rubber strap
with something blingy.
Do you still have that?
- Very casual piece. I have it.
Both: Ooh.
- The Big Bang Gold Ceramic.
- Big Bang.
That's what he'll be getting
for his birthday, sweetie.
- Ooh, lucky him.
- Is that what it's called?
Big Bang?
- I love being with Lisa,
so I feel like
the more we spend time together,
the better friends we become.
She's easy to be with.
- This is a very special piece
that was made
for ten years' anniversary.
[both gasp]
- Oh, my God.
- Oh!
No, that's way too blinged out
for him.
- I can't see Kenny in that.
- Oh, no... oh, God, no.
But how much is it?
- It's a little bit...
- How much is this?
- It's 920,000.
- Oh, that's nothing.
- Okay, you can have it back.
Thank you.
No, that's not gonna happen.
If I bought that,
I wouldn't have anything left
for shoes.
- Has to be special,
and it has to be something...
- Oh, yeah, what's this?
- That's not sim... [gasps]
- Okay, I like that.
- I like that too.
- How much is that?
- Still has a rubber strap.
25,200.
- You could change
the straps out yourself.
- Change rubber.
- I mean...
[snickers]
I like that you could
toss your old rubber out,
and have a new one very easily.
- [laughs]
Never use the same rubber twice,
darling.
- Oh, gosh.
- Um, sorry
about our bad behavior.
- I haven't used a rubber
in a long time.
- Clearly. [both laugh]
Okay, I'm gonna go with this.
- Yay! [claps]
- I love being able to have fun
with my girlfriends.
Without being all uber
bloody sensitive,
and Dorit's kind of got
a British sense of humor
because she's been
rolling around the hay with PK
for years.
- When's the last time you spent
something over $25,000?
- Oh, not since
the day before yesterday.
[laughs]
- Coming up...
- Kyle needs some underwear.
- I don't have any.
- Oh... oh!
[laughs] - Whoo!
[electronic music]
♪ ♪
- So we're gonna rip out
the entire windows,
and it's all gonna be even.
- Okay.
- Can you hold this for me?
- God, this is...
This needs a lot of work.
My store in the Hamptons
did really well,
so we decided
to open there permanently.
Looking good.
We're now opening a store
in New York City,
and I if can have
a successful store
in Beverly Hills and New York,
that's pretty crazy.
That's a dream come true.
- We'll be open in two months.
- Think we can get it done
in two months?
- Yeah.
- Are you sure about that?
- Yeah.
- Okay.
Yikes. - Yeah, be very careful.
- Oh, my God.
- Don't worry about it.
It will all be fine. - Oh, look.
There's Miss Rinna.
Hello. Be very careful.
- Oh.
- The nails are sticking up.
- Okay, hi!
- How are you?
- So good to see you.
How fun is this?
- You too.
This is Lizzie, my partner.
- Lizzie, hi.
- How are you?
- This is cool.
- I'm so happy you're here
to give us your advice.
- She's been to your boutique.
She was there years ago. - Yeah.
- I had two Belle Gray stores,
and that about killed me.
To have three stores
is really unbelievable.
It is a success.
And what a great area. - Yeah.
- Great area.
- My New York City store is
on the Upper East Side,
so we're gonna have to sell
a lot of dresses
to pay the rent.
- I wish Harry could see this
because, you know,
he built our stores, and he...
- I can't believe he did that.
- He's so...
- My husband doesn't even change
a light bulb, literally.
- Seriously, Harry Hamlin
can do anything and everything,
but it's a curse because
I know he can do everything,
so I'm like,
"Can you, please, do this?"
And he's so cheap,
he'll never call anybody else
to do it...
- [laughs]
- So it's really funny.
- Well, maybe
he can help me then.
I want him to build my cabinets
and do the painting
and maybe lay some floors
for me.
- I mean, I'll share him.
I will.
'Cause he really is quite good,
but she has to wait in line.
- If Harry wants to come help me
reorganize my underwear drawer
any time soon... [bell dings]
- Maybe he could come over
and attend to my plumbing.
- Not only get in line
with the ladies,
get in line with all the men.
Everybody would like
a little piece of Harry Hamlin.
- It was great seeing you.
- Nice to see you.
Congrats. - Thank you.
- I'm really happy for you.
- Thank you.
- She's probably putting
more stuff in the Jeep.
It's so funny. I love the Jeep.
- I love that Jeep.
It's so cute.
- So what's going on?
- Okay.
I've been just having
light, playful,
non-reactive conversation
with Vanderpump.
You know what I mean?
Like, I just wanna...
- Like, avoiding the elephant
in the room?
- Basically.
But I went up to her
and I just said, "You know what?
I'm sorry for being
so hard on you."
She said, "We can move on,"
and that took me back.
I thought,
"Well, I wanna move on.
How great."
- The fact that she said
"we can move on" is good.
- Let's see...
- She may just be so relieved
because it was weighing on her
that she does move on. - Okay.
- The things
that I have gone through
with Lisa Vanderpump
have been so small
in comparison
to what she's gone through
with Lisa Rinna,
but I think that
it's going to be
sort of put in a box
and put aside
and, you know,
opened up when needed.
If you know what I mean.
- You're making me
feel better about it 'cause
I was starting to, like...
- "Well, you know..."
- Second...
- That'll be $200.
- Would you like shoes
or would you like cash?
- I'll take cash. [both laugh]
♪ ♪
- Nora, honey, I'm gonna
take Jagger to the park.
I was gonna take little Phoenix,
but, you know,
it's so hot outside,
and I'm a little worried
with the cap.
Huh, Boo-boo girl?
Ah, ah, ah. - [laughs]
- She just...
It's like she could just...
- Yeah.
- When she gets a hold of me.
My darling little Phoenix
needs to wear a headband
because she favored one side
when she would sleep.
It started
to flatten out her skull.
It needs resetting.
You love your mommy, don't you?
You love your mama.
Even though, she's doing great,
and I know it's good for her.
I can't wait for
this fricking thing to be off.
- Okay.
- Louch?
- Yeah?
- I wanna bring a ball.
Oh, look at you. You're amazing.
Will you help me put,
uh, Jagger's car seat
in the car?
- Yeah.
- Yeah, step on it.
Put some fuel in the tank,
will you?
- [unintelligible]
- Ah.
I love my children more than
anything in this world,
but I have a lifestyle
where I depend immensely
on the nannies,
and they're an extension of me
in every possible way.
Here's my little baby!
- Here's the Jagger.
[upbeat music]
- Jagger, my little love bug,
do you wanna come to the park
with Mama?
- Yeah.
- You do?
Okay. How was speech therapy?
- Uh, it was... it was okay.
- Just okay?
- Yeah.
- I started to worry
when Jagger was getting close
to two years old,
and he really wasn't trying
to make an effort to speak...
Does Jagger wanna wear jeans?
Jeans?
No?
Do you wanna wear your bowtie?
"No, Mama."
and I didn't know
what I should or shouldn't
be doing to help him.
- Uh, you need to call her.
- Okay.
She concerned about anything?
- No, she's not concerned.
- Okay.
I don't see as much progress
as I'd like.
Of course, you want it
to happen in a second.
I mean, I'm worried.
I'm worried beyond.
[gasps]
You wanna drive? - Yeah.
- But, Jagger, first we have
to go to the park
and then you can drive.
- Well, good luck with that.
- Are you okay with that?
- Yeah.
- Okay.
Jagger has this ob... obsession
with driving.
Okay, well, drive
to the park quickly,
and then Mommy will drive
to the park, okay?
- No.
- Jagger's gonna drive
to the park? - Yeah.
- How about Mommy drives
to the park
and you drive home? - Yeah.
- Okay. Come on.
Every single day,
it's constantly...
[grunting]
- [crying]
- But, Jagger...
No? No sunglasses?
Negotiating with a two-year-old
is nearly impossible.
Do you wanna drive home? - Yeah.
- Okay, then we have
to go to the park,
so Jagger...
So you can drive home.
- [crying and screaming]
Ah, lordy, lordy, lordy.
It would be easier
to get Boy George to date women.
Basically. [laughs]
Do you wanna drive your Ferrari
in the driveway?
- Yeah.
[rasps] With the park.
[rasps]
[soft dramatic music]
♪ ♪
What's the weather
supposed to be like?
- I'm not sure.
- You know,
now that my mom's gone...
- Yeah.
- I have absolutely no reason
to go up to Cambria anymore.
- I'm sorry.
It's just tough.
My mom and I were best friends.
So before she started
getting dementia,
we talked constantly,
and I was up there all the time.
[car door closes]
♪ ♪
Remember all the times
you used to play here?
- [unintelligible]
- Fall down and skin your knees?
[gasps] Oh, wow.
- Oh, wow.
- Oh, yeah.
♪ ♪
With the amount
of stuff she had,
for it to be this empty is,
like, a miracle.
- Yep.
That's where she would sit.
Right there.
- I know.
- Favorite seat.
- My mom's name was Charlotte,
and...
♪ ♪
Um, she was a beautiful woman,
and she was pretty strong
for this 5'0"-,
70-pound woman.
♪ ♪
- You all right?
- No.
- Aw, I'm sorry.
- [crying softly]
When she first started
struggling with her brain,
she was aware of it.
- All right, where... should we
just look at the pictures.
[sighs]
Let me just take a second.
- Okay.
- And she looked at me
and was crying,
and she said, "I'm afraid...
'cause I feel like
these are changing."
That's the worst.
♪ ♪
It's so funny.
There's only two clocks left.
- Two clocks...
- This house had to have
50 clocks at one time.
- That's right.
- Remember how they all starter
charm... chiming
in the middle of the night?
I could never sleep
'cause they would start chiming
at different,
like, times all night long.
It was crazy.
- Yeah, that was true.
- This was on her birthday,
like, three years ago. - Mm-hmm.
♪ ♪
Oh, wow. Wow.
It was dementia.
So, in a way, it is a relief
that she's
not suffering anymore,
and in many ways,
as the dementia progressed,
it was easier because I realized
she wasn't aware anymore
of it changing.
- Are the re... is the rest
of the family gonna come up?
- How cute.
Everybody's been up, honey.
This is it.
That's why we're here.
I'm supposed to figure out
my part.
Her house is sold,
so it's the last time
we're going to be there,
and it's not just
saying good-bye to my mom,
but there's a certain finality
to saying good-bye
to everything that was her.
- Stop crying, Mom.
- Okay.
- It's okay.
- I know. Don't be sad.
It's been, like, eight months.
- I know. It ac... it's only been,
like, three actually,
but that's okay.
It's not a fun place to go to,
that sad place,
and Vinny knows it well,
Jesse knows it too well,
and I think he just
doesn't wanna go there.
- [laughing]
- Let's go.
- I don't even wanna say
good-bye.
- Whoa, whoa, you didn't
actually think I was sad.
- I know.
I don't wanna say good-bye.
Closing the door
of my mom's house
is symbolic for closing the door
of my mother's
physical existence
on this plane...
but she's here
all the time.
♪ ♪
- Coming up...
I gave birth vaginally
with both kids. - [laughs]
- So she came out
and her head was,
like, this long.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- All right, let's do this.
I'm so excited.
- [laughs]
both: Hi. - Nice to meet you.
- I'm Lisa Rinna. both: Hi.
- I'm Delilah. Nice to meet you.
- Welcome to CR.
- Delilah is signed
with Elite Model Management,
and she has a meeting
with CR Fashion Book.
I'm over the moon.
CR Fashion Book is,
like, the bible of fashion.
- I'm really so excited.
Like, wh... I wanna be this.
- Like, CR, is, like, the...
The ultimate. [both laugh]
I'm... I wanna be Gigi.
- There is a part of me
that would love
to reach out to Yolanda.
Unfortunately,
I f... ed that up.
- When my nurse wrote me
the definition of haus...
Munchausen disease,
that was the biggest f... ing
blow I've ever had in my life.
- And I'm sorry about that,
and it didn't come from me.
- Sorry is not enough.
- That's just something
that I have to live with.
- Hi.
- Hello.
- Hi, I'm Lisa.
- Hi, Evelien.
- Evelien, nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you too.
- Hi, I'm Delilah.
- Hi, Delilah.
Both: Nice to meet you.
- I was kind of like
the reject model.
My very first agent said to me,
Sweetie, you should just
get back on the bus,
and go back to Oregon,
and, I don't know.
I have this thing inside me
that's like...
maybe you've noticed it.
I go, "Well, f... you..."
[laughs]
When somebody says,
"You can't do something."
- A big part of the reason
we're so excited
about being here specifically
is that Delilah's career,
the way that we see it,
is just so dynamic. - Yeah.
- How long have you
been doing this?
- She only let me start modeling
when I was 17.
- Okay.
- Now I'm 18.
Well, I was also,
like, not very cute.
- [laughs]
- [quietly] Stop.
What do you mean?
- So from 17 to what...
You were cute. I just... you were.
She was... she's
come into her own.
I had a really hard birth
with her.
- They thought I was a boy.
- For a while,
but I... it took 24 hours,
it was really hard labor,
and I'm pretty small hipped,
right?
And I gave birth vaginally
both... with both kids.
- [laughs]
- So she came out
and her head was... - [laughs]
- It just was,
like, this long...
- [laughs]
- Because of my
birthing canal or whatever.
- Oh, my gosh.
I'm pretty embarrassed right now
for her to be talking about
my elongated head...
- [snickers]
- [laughs] And her birth canal,
um, with, like, everyone there
that I was trying to impress.
- So Harry thought
that she was deformed.
- Stop.
- No, seriously.
This was all going on
and I'm in, like, Mama Land.
Like, so excited
I've just given birth
and he's like...
He's going to the nurse...
- So crazy.
- "Get a hat, get a hat.
Quick. She needs a hat."
Because it was squished
in the birth canal.
- Oh, wow.
Like, this is great to know.
[all laugh] - Mind blowing.
- Thank God it's gone back.
- Wow.
- Anyway.
I've told you a lot.
- The most embarrassing thing
that my mom does
on a daily basis is
she runs around the house naked
when our friends are here.
[both laughing]
- No.
- Delilah, do you wanna
take some pictures?
- Yes.
- Delilah Belle is just starting
her senior year,
and she would like
to move to New York
to model and go to school.
All of the above.
She knows how to work it too,
doesn't she?
I love the effort
that's going forth.
She's, like, getting that...
- A little more and more.
- She's getting it down
more and more, right.
Honey, look who she comes from.
Come on. Get to it.
No f... ing wasting time now.
Whoo! Gucci, sign her.
Come on. - That's right.
♪ ♪
- Little ponies, did you have
a nice day out playing?
Did you have
a nice day out playing?
♪ ♪
both: Cheers. - Happy birthday.
I love you. - Thank you.
I love you too.
- Open this.
I want you to open this.
- Can you open it for me?
- No, come on.
Have we got to that age
that I'm gonna have
to start kind of
wiping your mouth for you...
- It's hard...
- And wiping your butt for you
and opening gifts for you?
- I told you no gifts.
I don't celebrate birthdays
anymore.
- Since when?
- I'm too old.
- I've thrown
a lot of big birthday parties
for Ken over the years...
- That's so cute.
- Happy birthday.
All: Aww!
- He look so much like you, Ken.
It's amazing. - Why don't...
[screams and laughter]
- But this I think
he wants something quieter.
It'll just be the two of us.
- What is this?
- Mm-mm.
- Ooh, wow, look at that.
Cheeky. - Do you love it?
- Oh, my goodness me.
I love it. - Do you love it?
- I do.
♪ ♪
I love you. - Oh, thank you.
- I have given my husband
many gifts,
but the greatest gift
I've ever given my husband
is our children.
Oh, and the blow job in the car.
I suppose we can call that...
- Look, Giggy's hair is growing.
Look.
- Giggy's hair
isn't growing back.
- I swear on my life, look.
- It doesn't matter how much...
He's got four hairs.
This is hair that's growing.
If it's competition,
I think you lost.
- Maybe, but he's starting
to grow some hair.
- He's a fluffy puppy
since he came from the pound.
Pound to the palace. Whoo-hoo.
Anyway, so there's lots
going on,
and today I was out looking
at another apartment for Max.
It means so much to me,
as a mother,
to be able to help my kids...
- It's the tenth
we've probably seen, isn't it?
- Yeah.
- You've seen a lot, and...
- How much is this?
- This one's seven.
- We're giving him the deposit,
so he's gotta be able
to pay the mortgage himself...
- Right.
- So it can't get too expensive.
However, before we help them,
we want them to struggle first.
- Right.
- So the challenge is trying
to find something
that he can afford.
- He pays rent
on the apartment now,
so better to have
his own apartment
and pay a small mortgage.
- Mm, yeah.
I've seen Max struggle.
I've seen I'm live
in the grotty apartment.
I even told Max I wouldn't pay
his electricity bill
so he and to take cold showers
and light a candle.
You are a...
- I didn't have electricity
for three months.
- Yeah, but I don't care.
And furnish it,
and we totally surprise him.
- Okay, why not? Let's do it.
- They've proved themselves,
they've worked hard,
so I want my kids to have
a luxurious life now,
and I'm gonna do it for them.
That boy has never asked us
for anything.
I mean is that because
he doesn't want anything
or he doesn't want to ask?
- Ah, I'm not sure.
What about when he
knocked his teeth out?
- Oh, yeah, he asked me
for new teeth.
- Exactly.
- Yeah,
and that cost me 15 grand.
- Exactly.
[both laugh]
[hip-hop music]
♪ ♪
both: Thank you.
♪ ♪
- What a gorgeous view this is.
- Oh, my gosh, yeah, yeah.
- Thank you.
♪ ♪
- Hello, ladies.
Welcome to Knickerbocker.
All: Hi. - Oh, my gosh.
This is so awesome.
Hello, girls! - Hi there.
How are you? - Hello, hello.
Muah. Is this not amazing?
- Can you believe
how gorgeous this view is?
- Oh, my God how beautiful.
- And this gorgeous night?
And here we are with our girls.
We finally get
our girls together.
I don't think any mother
is ever prepared
for their daughter to grow up.
They're still
two and three to me,
and then I look over and I go,
"Oh, my God,
"they're taller than I am.
They're these women."
And so I'm in total denial
about it.
- So how was your day today?
What happened with
your whole modeling thing?
What's going on with that?
- It was so fun.
I had a meeting,
um, and then a couple...
- With CR Fashion Book.
- Yeah.
- How tall are you?
- Like, 5'8".
Like... - You're definitely 5'6".
- Sisters, sisters.
- 5'8 ", 5'8".
- I'm 5'8".
- You look so mad.
- I'm gonna go with 5'7".
- I just got measured
the other day... - I'm 6'0".
- So if you guys
wanna fight about it
take it up with my agent.
- I'm not fighting about it.
[laughter]
- My girls do not hold back.
They will tell you and talk...
I wonder where they get that.
Oh, gee, I don't know.
I'm going to QVC tomorrow,
so the girls are gonna
stay here alone for two nights.
I'm a little worried about it.
- Does Harry know yet?
- Yeah.
- Don't be worried.
- I don't know why
I have anxiety about it.
- No, don't, don't.
- Not even anxiety.
Part of me's terrified,
and part of me goes,
"Hey, that's a good way
to toughen 'em up and get 'em
to figure it all out.
Um, what's the worst thing
that could happen?
They disappear.
[laughs] That'd be pretty bad.
- So you're going
to be here by yourself
in New York City for two days,
what do you have planned?
- We're gonna get
a couple tattoos,
- Oh, my God!
- A nose ring.
- I feel like you can,
go to, like, clubs, right?
I mean...
- No.
- So...
- No.
- [laughs]
I had a lot more freedom
than my children have.
My mom was a lot more trusting.
She was a lot more lenient...
I used to go to Studio 54
with my mom and my sister.
I was 10.
But did I stay
in New York City alone?
No. - She can't get in.
- Yeah.
Coming up...
[gasps] Look who I matched with!
You guys! - Who is that?
- You're scaring the sh...
Out of your mother right now.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Look! Look who I matched with!
You guys! both: What?
- Who did you match with?
- Who?
Who is that? - What?
- Okay, so there's
this dating app.
Just listen. - Are you on it?
- Just listen to me.
You just talk to them.
- You don't go meet them,
do you?
- No, no, no.
It's not only dating.
It's, like... you can form
business relationships,
and you can't get on it unless
you're, like, really special.
- Are you kidding?
That's such a crock of sh...
They're just saying that
so you feel good about yourself.
- They don't understand
the new, like, day and age
'cause it is the 21st century...
- Or maybe because you're 18
talking about getting
35-year-old men.
- I was never...
- But just a thought.
Talking about getting
35-year-old men.
- Just a thought. [chuckles]
- No.
- Oh, really?
- Really.
- Really?
- That's way too old.
- Really?
- How old are you?
- 45.
- Okay.
Well, that's old for me.
[all laughing]
- You're scaring the sh...
Out of your mother right now.
- Biggest crock of sh...
I've ever heard in my life.
- Okay, chill.
- I vote...
- Did you pay for this?
- No.
- Did your parents?
Both: Yes, you did!
- You paid for it?
- How much did you...
- Your parents paid for it.
- How much did I pay for this?
- Tell the truth.
I'm dying to know.
- Are you kidding me?
How much did I pay for this?
You're gonna... you know what?
- $9 a month.
[laughter] - How much?
- Nine.
- Don't you think it sounded
a little sketchy
if it's only $9 a month
and it's like you have to be
famous and rich or whatever?
- No, it's, like, 25.
- How much is it really?
- Oh, you're lying
about this amount?
- Really, how much is it?
- Like, 26.
- 2,600, by the way.
[laughter]
- You guys, I'm telling you...
- Oh, my God. This is not okay.
Listen. I have to go do QVC.
It's a big, big, big deal.
So I need you to tell me
that you guys are gonna
be great here for two days...
- Oh, yeah, I already told you.
- I wanna think
I trust them 100%.
I think they're good girls.
I hope. I'm giving 'em a chance.
I'm giving 'em a shot.
I don't know. I'm nervous
No... just no dating app stuff
while I'm gone. Okay?
- I'm not your mom,
I'm not your dad...
- But how about...
- But no dates in the city.
- Okay. Thank you, Kyle.
[soft dramatic music]
♪ ♪
- I feel after my mother
passed away,
I'm just kind of
in over my head.
It's been a lot of death
in a short amount of time,
and I'm a puddle
and I can't focus
and concentrate,
so I'm just...
You kind of just go...
[exhales]
Therapy, party of one.
I don't meant to keep, you know,
beating a dead horse...
excuse the pun. - Dead horse?
- I'm sorry.
But I just feel like
I'm missing something.
I can't explain it.
- You are missing something.
It's a tremendous loss.
- Hi, sweetie.
- Hi, beautiful.
- Welcome.
Come on. - How are you?
- I'm doing great.
- Good.
- So nice to see you.
- You too.
I'm in this weird situation...
I'm just gonna
jump right in here. - Go for it.
- Where, um, it's become
almost embarrassing
to have lost so many people, and
that seems like a strange thing.
I never would have ever imagined
to have that feeling,
but it's embarrassing
to keep sharing it.
- So you're putting judgment
on your loss and your grief?
- I guess so.
- Like there's a limit
on how many people can die
in a certain amount of time.
- [laughs]
Yes. - Yeah.
- My sister Mary
passed away very suddenly;
four years after that,
my sister Connie passed away;
six weeks later,
my niece Brooke passed away;
six months later,
Vinny's close cousin, Casey,
passed away;
and then his father,
Dick Van Patten,
passed away
six months after that;
and then my brother
six months after that;
and then my mother
a month after that.
I mean, it's just crazy.
I don't understand
why I'm so embarrassed
by people dying in my life.
- Right.
- It's a lot more complicated.
- Yes.
Do you remember the first time
you felt sadness?
- No... [chuckles]
Not the very first time.
- If you had to guess.
- Well, I know
by the time I came around,
'cause I'm the youngest
of seven,
there was a lot of discontent
in the house.
- Okay.
- I think with my parents,
there was just a huge disconnect
between the two of them.
- All right. So...
- And interestingly enough...
Oh, my God.
- Tell me.
- Embarrassed.
- About?
- I was embarrassed
by my parents not getting along.
It was embarrassing that
my parents didn't get along.
It was embarrassing
to have people over
and feel the tension
in the house.
- Right. The embarrassment
gets really hooked up
with the shame,
so if someone
brings up something
that you don't feel good about,
your knee-jerk reaction
is to shame.
- Yeah.
- Yes.
- I don't like making people
feel uncomfortable.
It makes me feel ashamed.
It's just kind of this weird
symbiotic relationship
that I'm just understanding is,
like, kind of pervasive
in my life.
- Don't forget that you're a
soul having a human experience.
If you allow others
to be uncomfortable,
you're really being
authentically you.
Stop making things okay
for everyone else and be you.
- It's... it's
a lose/lose situation anyway
'cause you can't make everything
okay for everybody else.
- Right.
- I do feel a sense of relief
that it's okay to let go
and kind of just,
like, be in the moment
with what I'm feeling.
I think it's definitely a right
and a strong first step.
I feel better already.
Just acknowledging it on...
On that level.
I really do.
- Coming up...
- Don't put your hands
up my skirt
unless you wanna see
what's up there.
- I saw that.
[laughs] - Whoo!
[upbeat music]
[phone ringing]
- Hello?
- Hi, honey, how are you?
- I'm great. You?
- I'm good.
Just trying
to get out of the house.
I'm meeting everybody.
We're going to,
uh, a white party tonight
at PUMP.
I feel like we're both so busy.
Like, I went to New York
and then you're in Mexico
and I'm here and then...
- I know.
We're all over the place.
- Between Mauricio's traveling
and my traveling,
I just feel like life is
completely crazy right now.
- Well, I'm glad you called.
I love you.
I'll see you
in a couple of days.
- Bye, honey. Love you.
♪ ♪
[cell phone line ringing]
- Hello?
- Where all right you?
- Well, I'm coming up.
- Well, I have
a fashion emergency.
You don't happen to have any
nude color extra underwear
in your purse, do you?
- Darling, they would be
way too small for you.
Otherwise,
I would lend them to you.
- [laughs] No, I-I...
They're...
They're showing through.
I'm wearing white with white.
Okay, hurry up. - I'm coming.
Bye. - Okay, bye.
Hi there. - Hey, how are you?
- Hey.
- How are you?
Good to see you.
- How are you, Kyle?
- You're looking nice
both of you.
- Thank you.
- Aw, you look beautiful, Kyle.
- Oh, look what happened.
- You okay?
- It's showing through,
so I'm like...
- So why don't you take it off?
You can take it off because...
- I mean, I'd rather
the underwear show.
- Hello.
Did you get your knickers?
- So funny.
- Over here.
- Cheers.
- Hi, guys.
- Are you going
to the white party then?
- Yes, but I didn't know... I...
Really know it was
a white party.
I always like things
that are fashionable,
stylish, a little over the top.
I'm always gonna give you
that pretty silhouette
and something to look at.
That's just who I am.
- How did you guys not know
that it was a white party?
- I got lucky.
- Just by chance.
- Darling, you were born lucky.
- What're you guys having?
- Vodka Red Bulls.
- I'm having a chardonnay.
It feels more innocent,
but I feel better
when I've had a margarita.
- I want a margarita.
That's what I was gonna have.
- Should we switch
to margaritas?
- I'm starting with that
and I'm ending with that.
- [laughs]
- I couldn't say anything
until today,
but we cast
Alicia Silverstone...
- [gasps]
- Oh, I...
- From "Clueless" to be
playing my mom
in my scripted show.
- That's really good.
- I am so excited for you.
- That is so good.
- And what show is this, Kyle?
- It's a scripted show
that I'm producing...
- Oh, amazing.
- Inspired by my life
growing up in the '70s,
so she'd be playing my mother.
Alicia Silverstone,
just sitting
in the room with her
and meeting with her,
I was thinking,
"This is really crazy."
I feel like someone's gonna,
like, pinch me
and I'm gonna wake up.
- I'm gonna go see Eileen
and her executive producers
for Y&R.
- You're auditioning?
- No, for my birthday,
she gave me, like, a small part.
- Oh, right.
- Do you wanna be on my show?
- F... yeah,
I wanna be on your show!
- [laughs]
- Are you serious?
- Awesome, yeah!
- Oh, my God!
It's kind of exciting...
- How fun.
- And kind of, like, scary
all at the same time
'cause, like,
total fish out of water,
but I just pray I don't,
like, disappoint her
or let anyone down...
- Of course you won't.
- You know,
and just do the best I can.
- Eileen asked me to do it.
- You asked her.
- Can I just have one line?
- No.
I don't have that kind of power.
- Can I have one line?
Just speak to Newman?
- Oh, my God.
- You used to do acting, though,
did you?
- Yeah, like,
with the black and white movies.
- Silent films.
- Yeah, exactly.
- That is so rude.
- That was not.
It's English. Too good.
- Thank you.
- I'm sure it's...
- I don't know why people
don't get the English humor.
- You know what you and I
should do?
Let's get fake British accents
and start insulting people,
and just...
- We don't call it insulting.
We call it self-deprecation.
- Yeah, you don...
- How about we just celebrate
and be nice to one another?
- That's too American, darling.
- I know, but we're in America.
- Okay, maybe it's starting...
- I do think that there's
definitely a fine line.
I think that Americans need
to kind of, like... deep breath.
- You're an American.
What are you talking about?
- And that's what I'm saying.
- You're born in Connecticut.
- Oh, my God.
That's why I can speak
as an American and say...
- Okay.
- Americans need
to take a deep breath.
Chill out. It's funny.
Erika, settle down.
Take a deep breath
for crying out loud.
I had lunch with my husband
the other day
and I said, "You know, Erika's,
like, this beautiful girl.
She's very, very poised.
It's like you've got
this sort of aura about you.
Very, very strong,
a bit guarded.
- I think in life,
you know, when you meet people,
and you meet people
for the first time,
it's best to be cautious.
- A... because you're cynical
or because what... what is it?
- I mean...
- I mean, I just am what I am.
I don't trust everybody.
Friendship is earned.
Respect is earned.
It's not just given.
Sorry. Well, not really.
- Erika, sorry,
but, um, Kyle needs
some underwear.
- I don't have any.
- Oh... oh!
[laughs] - Whoo!
- That's right.
- I saw that.
- Don't put your hands
up my skirt
unless you wanna
see what's up there.
- I saw that.
- Unless you wanna get bit.
- See? Don't take...
Don't push me Miss Vanderpump.
- Oh, my gosh.
- I'll take you there.
- Oh, my God.
- I told you that.
- Why don't you have
any knickers on?
- Because it doesn't look good
under my dress.
I have on a Mugler dress.
Why would I break up
a beautiful design
with an underwear line?
With a panty line?
Really?
- Erika, you're the most
out there person like that.
- Yes, but it's a... it's a pers...
Stage persona.
I'm a... I'm a real,
like, introvert.
- Oh, my God.
- And cover up your snatch
while you're at it.
- My snatch has been covered.
- Come on.
- Nobody really understands.
I'm really an introvert.
- I totally get that.
- Shy, I'm... all of that.
I'm like...
- I'm just not buying it.
Snooty?
A bit. Cold? Frigid?
Yes. Introverted?
No. - Well, come on.
Let's go to this party.
- Okay, come on then.
Let's do it.
♪ ♪
- You know we look
kind of weird all in white...
- Listen, just roll with it, PK.
Just roll.
- Yeah, I'm rolling.
I'm rolling.
- Coming up.
- What a I supposed to say?
- What do you mean?
- "Close you're legs, darling.
I don't like the view"?
I didn't mind the view.
[upbeat music]
- No, mine.
- Hi, guys.
- Hi, my love.
- Jaggs, what's going on?
- Well, I'm start... I'm trying
to feed Jagger lunch,
but he decided to take my lunch.
He's obsessed with my sushi.
- Mine.
- Okay, Mommy will put it
right here.
Yes? I can take credit
or be blamed for this.
I've never ordered something
for Jagger from the kids' menu.
I could order chateaubriand
for Jagger
and he would like it.
- Babe, good party last night.
- That was a fun party.
- Yeah!
- PUMP...
- It was, wasn't it, Jagger?
- Yeah. PUMP was pumping.
- PUMP was pumping.
- The scenery was good.
- It was very glam.
- No, I-I meant all the scenery.
The earlier scenery.
- Oh, my God.
When Vanderpump sticks her hand
up Erika's dress
and discovers she's not wearing
any underwear...
- Kyle needs some underwear.
- I don't have any.
- Oh... oh!
- I thought, immediately,
no big deal.
We all have gone
without any underwear.
- You know, the funny thing is,
I was sitting there
and obviously, you know,
I'm a straight male,
so I noticed quite early on.
- [fussing]
- I knew it wasn't
nude underwear.
- I don't know
how you could sit there.
- I'm never gonna say anything
because it's completely
inappropriate.
- I don't know
if she deliberately
flashed anyone,
but he's a man
for crying out loud.
I completely understand that PK
could not stop staring
at Erika's hooha.
To me, PK, I swear to you,
when I first saw,
I thought she was wearing
nude underwear.
- I was getting hot.
- Like "hot"... aroused "hot"?
- No, not "hot" hot, no.
Under the collar.
Like, embarrassed.
- "Hot" like, "What the f...?
I've had some girl's snatch
staring at me in the face"?
- No, like "hot" as in...
I'm sitting there,
I've gotta focus,
and then I just keep
going like this.
- Do you know what I mean?
It was one of those.
- Just tell me one thing
right now.
- Just sit a different way.
- Did you... were you
a little turned on?
- Not even remotely, babe.
- Just a tiny bit turned on?
- Don't get... honey...
- PK is not going
to say something
when we're within a group
about something
that is so fundamentally
uncomfortable to him.
- What am I supposed to say?
- What do you mean?
- "Close your legs, darling.
I don't like the view"?
I didn't mind the view.
- I know, I know.
I know this.
If I went there in a short skirt
and there was a man
sitting in front of me,
I would do everything
in my power
to make sure
that my legs were crossed
or I'd have a napkin over it
or I'd have a pillow on my lap.
I would do something. - Yeah.
Maybe Erika's bits are available
for the world.
I don't know. - I wanna give her
the benefit of the doubt.
Maybe she didn't have
her most ladylike moment,
but these things happen.
I think Erika's got
a good sense of humor,
so let me have a joke
and have a laugh with her.
- I'm gonna go out
and do some work.
- Right? Right.
- [fussing]
- You can come sit opposite me
with your legs open. - Hold on.
Let me change my outfit.
- [chuckles]
- I need to put something white
and short on.
Next on "The Real Housewives
of Beverly Hills"...
- Lisa is with us today.
- My manufacturer said to me,
"Tell Harry
he never has to work again
a day in his life
if he doesn't want to."
- Are we excited
to get locked up?
All: Yeah! - Oh, God, yes.
- What the hell?
[clangs] [all scream]
- I'm sorry, but isn't it
kind of like, lady 101?
Cross your legs.
- I thought it was underwear
until she said
she wasn't wearing any.
- I saw what Mr. Girardi's
been munching on
for the last 20 years.
[laughs]
- This is a cheeky little gift.
- Oh, these are beautiful.
- Aren't they?
We've all seen
your pretty little puss now.
- I'm gonna give you
some really good advice:
The more you talk about sh...
The worse it gets.
- To learn more
about the Housewives,
Housewives of Beverly Hills"...
- Can I welcome you
to Dorit's Buddha Lounge?
- Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God.
- I'm sorry for being
so hard on you.
- I never thought I'd actually
get an apology from Rinna.
Okay, let's move on. - Really?
- Yeah.
- This is now closure,
and we're moving forward.
- Alexia, Lisa is gonna be
in New York
when Sophia and I go next week.
But we could squeeze in dinner
and fun stuff.
- Yeah, we have
to squeeze in dinner.
- What no one knew was that you
lost your mom over the reunion.
- I know.
Losing my mother's affected
how I feel about Lisa Vanderpump
and everything that happened
because...
it's trivial.
Maybe I need to see somebody.
[upbeat music]
- The crown is heavy, darlings,
so just leave it
where it belongs.
- I may be two people,
but I'm not two-faced.
♪ ♪
- My advice to you:
don't hustle the hustler.
♪ ♪
- I speak no evil,
but I see and hear everything.
♪ ♪
- When you've
traveled the world,
you can speak
in any accent you want.
♪ ♪
- I'm an expert on luxury,
and I can always spot a fake.
♪ ♪
[electronic music]
♪ ♪
- Who wakes up at this time?
I don't even wake up this early
for work.
- Why isn't he here?
- I want eggs.
- I can't help you with that
right now.
- What do I do?
He's five minutes late.
[cell phone beeping]
- Amelia and I are flying
to New York City
to visit Delilah Belle
who is modeling,
going on castings
with her agents.
She recently modeled
for "Teen Vogue."
It's that moment where you go,
"I think she's gonna make it.
Like, it's gonna happen
for her."
[door closes]
Should I just run down there
and look at the gate?
It's just not normal.
- My mom is so annoying.
I can't handle all that.
- Maybe it's a menopause thing.
They just, like...
[laughs]
- I think it's just genetic.
[both laugh]
That was, like,
going a little far.
- It's here.
- It's here?
Okay, let's go.
Why don't you follow me?
Now, it's steep right here.
- Oh, God.
- We're going to LAX.
- Right.
- Okay, get in.
[trunk closes]
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Hi, sweetie, how are you?
- We are in a penthouse
on the Lower East Side.
I'm looking at
a gorgeous Manhattan right now.
It is so beautiful.
- I love you guys.
Have fun.
- Okay, honey, love you.
- This is really high up.
I don't like it.
- I travel to New York City
quite often.
I try to bring my girls
each time.
This time it is Sophia's turn.
Have some food.
It's actually good.
- I Don't want that.
It looks so gross.
- I would say,
of my four daughters,
Sophia is the most like me.
Have... have some fruit.
Have some berries.
- Mom, you kno...
You know that I hate fruit.
You bring me fruit
every single morning,
and every single time,
I tell you I don't like it,
and I never eat it.
I tell you this every morning.
Especially blueberries.
- [laughs] Sorry.
It's good for you.
She's very smart,
she's very funny,
and she loves
to give me a hard time.
I'm a cool mom, okay?
- I know you are.
- Let's get ready.
♪ ♪
- Where's the entrance?
- I think we go up these stairs.
I just cannot believe
that I have a child
that is 5'10".
I am 5'2"
and she really does
just kind of go like,
"Mm-hmm.
No, Mom, I'm not doing that."
- What are these buildings?
- Um, that's
the Empire State Building.
You wanna go up to the top?
- Nope.
- How scared would you be
to do that?
- I'm actually scared
of, like, everything.
- Sophia has anxiety like I do.
- Watch.
- F... ing hell, oh, my God.
Oh, my God. Why am I doing this?
I thought this was supposed
to be a relaxing vacation.
[bees buzzing]
Oh, my God, there's a bee.
I'm so sorry. I'm sorry.
But she also inherited,
you know, a lot of other
good things from me too.
At least we can laugh about it.
- True.
- Let's send Dad a picture.
He'll be so proud of us
that we're up here.
Smile.
We're sending this to dad.
- [chuckles]
[camera clicks]
[gasps]
Something touched my leg.
- A twig.
[laughing]
♪ ♪
- Hello?
- Hi.
- Hello, little man.
- Hi, darling.
- Ah, you look gorgeous in that.
Muah. - How you doing?
- So we're... we're going shopping
for something
for Ken's birthday,
and he's the most impossible
person to buy for on the planet.
- Really?
- Yeah.
Last year, you know,
I bought him two little ponies.
- Oh, my goodness me.
- Are they the most beautiful
things in the whole world?
- Oh, I'm just... I'm...
I'm blown away, actually.
- But those two little ponies...
- Well, they weren't really
for him. - Well, he loves them,
but maybe it wasn't quite
what he was expecting,
I would say. - [laughs]
- So it's either a watch
or a donkey.
[both laugh]
Dorit's got great taste,
she's a great friend,
so maybe she can help me
find something really fabulous
for Ken's birthday.
Bye, Jagger. - Love you, baby.
We'll see you in a little bit.
- Yeah, we won't be too long.
- No, we're gonna nail this.
- We'll come back
when all the money is gone.
- [laughs]
We're gonna find the best
possible present for him.
- It's just not gonna have
four legs.
- [laughs]
- Jump in.
- Whoo-hoo.
I love Lisa Vanderpump.
I mean, when I'm with her,
she brings out the humor,
the fun, the fabulousness,
the glam.
I mean, we're like
two peas in a pod.
Oh, my God,
that's, like, pepper spray.
- That is pepper spray.
Absolutely.
- Why do you have pepper spray?
- If Ken's getting
a bit amorous,
get out the pepper spray.
- [laughs]
[claps] - [chuckles]
[hip-hop music]
- We are late.
Let's get our asses in here.
- Hello.
- Finally.
Sorry, doll. Took me a minute.
- Busy, busy, girl.
- That's right.
- Welcome.
- Ooh.
I've got some shows coming up.
Denver, Vegas, and Greece.
Those are gonna be fun,
but what I'm really
most excited about
is this new video, "Expensive."
- The final four...
- Yay.
- That made it. [applause]
- I'm so glad
because it was tough,
but I knew exactly who I wanted
right away.
- You did.
- I found some hot bitches.
- Five, six, seven, eight.
[Erika Jayne's "Expensive"]
[indistinct rapping]
- 'Cause I don't give a f...
I mean, they have
high, tight asses.
High, tight boobs.
I mean, these dancers
are super sassy,
super... They deliver.
- So we've just been reviewing.
- Cool.
- So, um, why don't you
take a peak.
- ♪ Drop down ♪
♪ Expensive ♪
- Here we go!
- 'Cause I don't give a f...
[whip cracks]
♪ It's expensive to be me... ♪
Yes!
[all laugh]
- It's nice, huh?
- Yay!
- Hot, right?
- I think it's gonna be
a lot of fun,
which is what my music is
all about,
having fun, dancing, letting go,
releasing,
forgetting your troubles.
That's what Erika Jayne
is all about.
- We need to do a fitting
with you with Dani Michelle,
a tech scout, hair, nails,
wig consultations,
just, like, everything.
We've gotta add that all into
the schedule, Laia.
- My team and I work very hard,
but Erika Jayne is simply
an on-stage persona,
and she gets put to bed
when she's not on stage.
- Obviously, the video is, like,
uber important.
- We'll get it done.
- You know, 'cause I know you
have other things going on.
- [taps on table]
Listen, just one day at a time.
- Yeah. Cool.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Oh, my God, we're gonna find
the best present ever.
- Hi.
- Welcome to Hublot.
[overlapping greetings]
- Care if he sits up here?
- Of course.
- Is that okay?
[dog sneezes] - Oh, good...
- Oh... [both laughing]
- Sorry about that.
- Is it okay if he sneezes
all over your counter?
- Here, I'll grab some tissues.
- Oh, Lisa.
- No, no, Lisa, don't... no.
- That's okay.
- I'll grab some tissues.
- You have to appreciate
that she loves her dog
for her to be wiping
Harrison's snot
with her couture dress. [laughs]
- Okay, I can actually
use him to...
- I was gonna say,
you're using him.
- Now if I stuck a pole
up his ass,
I could probably do the floor
as well.
I remember there was something
like a rubber strap
with something blingy.
Do you still have that?
- Very casual piece. I have it.
Both: Ooh.
- The Big Bang Gold Ceramic.
- Big Bang.
That's what he'll be getting
for his birthday, sweetie.
- Ooh, lucky him.
- Is that what it's called?
Big Bang?
- I love being with Lisa,
so I feel like
the more we spend time together,
the better friends we become.
She's easy to be with.
- This is a very special piece
that was made
for ten years' anniversary.
[both gasp]
- Oh, my God.
- Oh!
No, that's way too blinged out
for him.
- I can't see Kenny in that.
- Oh, no... oh, God, no.
But how much is it?
- It's a little bit...
- How much is this?
- It's 920,000.
- Oh, that's nothing.
- Okay, you can have it back.
Thank you.
No, that's not gonna happen.
If I bought that,
I wouldn't have anything left
for shoes.
- Has to be special,
and it has to be something...
- Oh, yeah, what's this?
- That's not sim... [gasps]
- Okay, I like that.
- I like that too.
- How much is that?
- Still has a rubber strap.
25,200.
- You could change
the straps out yourself.
- Change rubber.
- I mean...
[snickers]
I like that you could
toss your old rubber out,
and have a new one very easily.
- [laughs]
Never use the same rubber twice,
darling.
- Oh, gosh.
- Um, sorry
about our bad behavior.
- I haven't used a rubber
in a long time.
- Clearly. [both laugh]
Okay, I'm gonna go with this.
- Yay! [claps]
- I love being able to have fun
with my girlfriends.
Without being all uber
bloody sensitive,
and Dorit's kind of got
a British sense of humor
because she's been
rolling around the hay with PK
for years.
- When's the last time you spent
something over $25,000?
- Oh, not since
the day before yesterday.
[laughs]
- Coming up...
- Kyle needs some underwear.
- I don't have any.
- Oh... oh!
[laughs] - Whoo!
[electronic music]
♪ ♪
- So we're gonna rip out
the entire windows,
and it's all gonna be even.
- Okay.
- Can you hold this for me?
- God, this is...
This needs a lot of work.
My store in the Hamptons
did really well,
so we decided
to open there permanently.
Looking good.
We're now opening a store
in New York City,
and I if can have
a successful store
in Beverly Hills and New York,
that's pretty crazy.
That's a dream come true.
- We'll be open in two months.
- Think we can get it done
in two months?
- Yeah.
- Are you sure about that?
- Yeah.
- Okay.
Yikes. - Yeah, be very careful.
- Oh, my God.
- Don't worry about it.
It will all be fine. - Oh, look.
There's Miss Rinna.
Hello. Be very careful.
- Oh.
- The nails are sticking up.
- Okay, hi!
- How are you?
- So good to see you.
How fun is this?
- You too.
This is Lizzie, my partner.
- Lizzie, hi.
- How are you?
- This is cool.
- I'm so happy you're here
to give us your advice.
- She's been to your boutique.
She was there years ago. - Yeah.
- I had two Belle Gray stores,
and that about killed me.
To have three stores
is really unbelievable.
It is a success.
And what a great area. - Yeah.
- Great area.
- My New York City store is
on the Upper East Side,
so we're gonna have to sell
a lot of dresses
to pay the rent.
- I wish Harry could see this
because, you know,
he built our stores, and he...
- I can't believe he did that.
- He's so...
- My husband doesn't even change
a light bulb, literally.
- Seriously, Harry Hamlin
can do anything and everything,
but it's a curse because
I know he can do everything,
so I'm like,
"Can you, please, do this?"
And he's so cheap,
he'll never call anybody else
to do it...
- [laughs]
- So it's really funny.
- Well, maybe
he can help me then.
I want him to build my cabinets
and do the painting
and maybe lay some floors
for me.
- I mean, I'll share him.
I will.
'Cause he really is quite good,
but she has to wait in line.
- If Harry wants to come help me
reorganize my underwear drawer
any time soon... [bell dings]
- Maybe he could come over
and attend to my plumbing.
- Not only get in line
with the ladies,
get in line with all the men.
Everybody would like
a little piece of Harry Hamlin.
- It was great seeing you.
- Nice to see you.
Congrats. - Thank you.
- I'm really happy for you.
- Thank you.
- She's probably putting
more stuff in the Jeep.
It's so funny. I love the Jeep.
- I love that Jeep.
It's so cute.
- So what's going on?
- Okay.
I've been just having
light, playful,
non-reactive conversation
with Vanderpump.
You know what I mean?
Like, I just wanna...
- Like, avoiding the elephant
in the room?
- Basically.
But I went up to her
and I just said, "You know what?
I'm sorry for being
so hard on you."
She said, "We can move on,"
and that took me back.
I thought,
"Well, I wanna move on.
How great."
- The fact that she said
"we can move on" is good.
- Let's see...
- She may just be so relieved
because it was weighing on her
that she does move on. - Okay.
- The things
that I have gone through
with Lisa Vanderpump
have been so small
in comparison
to what she's gone through
with Lisa Rinna,
but I think that
it's going to be
sort of put in a box
and put aside
and, you know,
opened up when needed.
If you know what I mean.
- You're making me
feel better about it 'cause
I was starting to, like...
- "Well, you know..."
- Second...
- That'll be $200.
- Would you like shoes
or would you like cash?
- I'll take cash. [both laugh]
♪ ♪
- Nora, honey, I'm gonna
take Jagger to the park.
I was gonna take little Phoenix,
but, you know,
it's so hot outside,
and I'm a little worried
with the cap.
Huh, Boo-boo girl?
Ah, ah, ah. - [laughs]
- She just...
It's like she could just...
- Yeah.
- When she gets a hold of me.
My darling little Phoenix
needs to wear a headband
because she favored one side
when she would sleep.
It started
to flatten out her skull.
It needs resetting.
You love your mommy, don't you?
You love your mama.
Even though, she's doing great,
and I know it's good for her.
I can't wait for
this fricking thing to be off.
- Okay.
- Louch?
- Yeah?
- I wanna bring a ball.
Oh, look at you. You're amazing.
Will you help me put,
uh, Jagger's car seat
in the car?
- Yeah.
- Yeah, step on it.
Put some fuel in the tank,
will you?
- [unintelligible]
- Ah.
I love my children more than
anything in this world,
but I have a lifestyle
where I depend immensely
on the nannies,
and they're an extension of me
in every possible way.
Here's my little baby!
- Here's the Jagger.
[upbeat music]
- Jagger, my little love bug,
do you wanna come to the park
with Mama?
- Yeah.
- You do?
Okay. How was speech therapy?
- Uh, it was... it was okay.
- Just okay?
- Yeah.
- I started to worry
when Jagger was getting close
to two years old,
and he really wasn't trying
to make an effort to speak...
Does Jagger wanna wear jeans?
Jeans?
No?
Do you wanna wear your bowtie?
"No, Mama."
and I didn't know
what I should or shouldn't
be doing to help him.
- Uh, you need to call her.
- Okay.
She concerned about anything?
- No, she's not concerned.
- Okay.
I don't see as much progress
as I'd like.
Of course, you want it
to happen in a second.
I mean, I'm worried.
I'm worried beyond.
[gasps]
You wanna drive? - Yeah.
- But, Jagger, first we have
to go to the park
and then you can drive.
- Well, good luck with that.
- Are you okay with that?
- Yeah.
- Okay.
Jagger has this ob... obsession
with driving.
Okay, well, drive
to the park quickly,
and then Mommy will drive
to the park, okay?
- No.
- Jagger's gonna drive
to the park? - Yeah.
- How about Mommy drives
to the park
and you drive home? - Yeah.
- Okay. Come on.
Every single day,
it's constantly...
[grunting]
- [crying]
- But, Jagger...
No? No sunglasses?
Negotiating with a two-year-old
is nearly impossible.
Do you wanna drive home? - Yeah.
- Okay, then we have
to go to the park,
so Jagger...
So you can drive home.
- [crying and screaming]
Ah, lordy, lordy, lordy.
It would be easier
to get Boy George to date women.
Basically. [laughs]
Do you wanna drive your Ferrari
in the driveway?
- Yeah.
[rasps] With the park.
[rasps]
[soft dramatic music]
♪ ♪
What's the weather
supposed to be like?
- I'm not sure.
- You know,
now that my mom's gone...
- Yeah.
- I have absolutely no reason
to go up to Cambria anymore.
- I'm sorry.
It's just tough.
My mom and I were best friends.
So before she started
getting dementia,
we talked constantly,
and I was up there all the time.
[car door closes]
♪ ♪
Remember all the times
you used to play here?
- [unintelligible]
- Fall down and skin your knees?
[gasps] Oh, wow.
- Oh, wow.
- Oh, yeah.
♪ ♪
With the amount
of stuff she had,
for it to be this empty is,
like, a miracle.
- Yep.
That's where she would sit.
Right there.
- I know.
- Favorite seat.
- My mom's name was Charlotte,
and...
♪ ♪
Um, she was a beautiful woman,
and she was pretty strong
for this 5'0"-,
70-pound woman.
♪ ♪
- You all right?
- No.
- Aw, I'm sorry.
- [crying softly]
When she first started
struggling with her brain,
she was aware of it.
- All right, where... should we
just look at the pictures.
[sighs]
Let me just take a second.
- Okay.
- And she looked at me
and was crying,
and she said, "I'm afraid...
'cause I feel like
these are changing."
That's the worst.
♪ ♪
It's so funny.
There's only two clocks left.
- Two clocks...
- This house had to have
50 clocks at one time.
- That's right.
- Remember how they all starter
charm... chiming
in the middle of the night?
I could never sleep
'cause they would start chiming
at different,
like, times all night long.
It was crazy.
- Yeah, that was true.
- This was on her birthday,
like, three years ago. - Mm-hmm.
♪ ♪
Oh, wow. Wow.
It was dementia.
So, in a way, it is a relief
that she's
not suffering anymore,
and in many ways,
as the dementia progressed,
it was easier because I realized
she wasn't aware anymore
of it changing.
- Are the re... is the rest
of the family gonna come up?
- How cute.
Everybody's been up, honey.
This is it.
That's why we're here.
I'm supposed to figure out
my part.
Her house is sold,
so it's the last time
we're going to be there,
and it's not just
saying good-bye to my mom,
but there's a certain finality
to saying good-bye
to everything that was her.
- Stop crying, Mom.
- Okay.
- It's okay.
- I know. Don't be sad.
It's been, like, eight months.
- I know. It ac... it's only been,
like, three actually,
but that's okay.
It's not a fun place to go to,
that sad place,
and Vinny knows it well,
Jesse knows it too well,
and I think he just
doesn't wanna go there.
- [laughing]
- Let's go.
- I don't even wanna say
good-bye.
- Whoa, whoa, you didn't
actually think I was sad.
- I know.
I don't wanna say good-bye.
Closing the door
of my mom's house
is symbolic for closing the door
of my mother's
physical existence
on this plane...
but she's here
all the time.
♪ ♪
- Coming up...
I gave birth vaginally
with both kids. - [laughs]
- So she came out
and her head was,
like, this long.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- All right, let's do this.
I'm so excited.
- [laughs]
both: Hi. - Nice to meet you.
- I'm Lisa Rinna. both: Hi.
- I'm Delilah. Nice to meet you.
- Welcome to CR.
- Delilah is signed
with Elite Model Management,
and she has a meeting
with CR Fashion Book.
I'm over the moon.
CR Fashion Book is,
like, the bible of fashion.
- I'm really so excited.
Like, wh... I wanna be this.
- Like, CR, is, like, the...
The ultimate. [both laugh]
I'm... I wanna be Gigi.
- There is a part of me
that would love
to reach out to Yolanda.
Unfortunately,
I f... ed that up.
- When my nurse wrote me
the definition of haus...
Munchausen disease,
that was the biggest f... ing
blow I've ever had in my life.
- And I'm sorry about that,
and it didn't come from me.
- Sorry is not enough.
- That's just something
that I have to live with.
- Hi.
- Hello.
- Hi, I'm Lisa.
- Hi, Evelien.
- Evelien, nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you too.
- Hi, I'm Delilah.
- Hi, Delilah.
Both: Nice to meet you.
- I was kind of like
the reject model.
My very first agent said to me,
Sweetie, you should just
get back on the bus,
and go back to Oregon,
and, I don't know.
I have this thing inside me
that's like...
maybe you've noticed it.
I go, "Well, f... you..."
[laughs]
When somebody says,
"You can't do something."
- A big part of the reason
we're so excited
about being here specifically
is that Delilah's career,
the way that we see it,
is just so dynamic. - Yeah.
- How long have you
been doing this?
- She only let me start modeling
when I was 17.
- Okay.
- Now I'm 18.
Well, I was also,
like, not very cute.
- [laughs]
- [quietly] Stop.
What do you mean?
- So from 17 to what...
You were cute. I just... you were.
She was... she's
come into her own.
I had a really hard birth
with her.
- They thought I was a boy.
- For a while,
but I... it took 24 hours,
it was really hard labor,
and I'm pretty small hipped,
right?
And I gave birth vaginally
both... with both kids.
- [laughs]
- So she came out
and her head was... - [laughs]
- It just was,
like, this long...
- [laughs]
- Because of my
birthing canal or whatever.
- Oh, my gosh.
I'm pretty embarrassed right now
for her to be talking about
my elongated head...
- [snickers]
- [laughs] And her birth canal,
um, with, like, everyone there
that I was trying to impress.
- So Harry thought
that she was deformed.
- Stop.
- No, seriously.
This was all going on
and I'm in, like, Mama Land.
Like, so excited
I've just given birth
and he's like...
He's going to the nurse...
- So crazy.
- "Get a hat, get a hat.
Quick. She needs a hat."
Because it was squished
in the birth canal.
- Oh, wow.
Like, this is great to know.
[all laugh] - Mind blowing.
- Thank God it's gone back.
- Wow.
- Anyway.
I've told you a lot.
- The most embarrassing thing
that my mom does
on a daily basis is
she runs around the house naked
when our friends are here.
[both laughing]
- No.
- Delilah, do you wanna
take some pictures?
- Yes.
- Delilah Belle is just starting
her senior year,
and she would like
to move to New York
to model and go to school.
All of the above.
She knows how to work it too,
doesn't she?
I love the effort
that's going forth.
She's, like, getting that...
- A little more and more.
- She's getting it down
more and more, right.
Honey, look who she comes from.
Come on. Get to it.
No f... ing wasting time now.
Whoo! Gucci, sign her.
Come on. - That's right.
♪ ♪
- Little ponies, did you have
a nice day out playing?
Did you have
a nice day out playing?
♪ ♪
both: Cheers. - Happy birthday.
I love you. - Thank you.
I love you too.
- Open this.
I want you to open this.
- Can you open it for me?
- No, come on.
Have we got to that age
that I'm gonna have
to start kind of
wiping your mouth for you...
- It's hard...
- And wiping your butt for you
and opening gifts for you?
- I told you no gifts.
I don't celebrate birthdays
anymore.
- Since when?
- I'm too old.
- I've thrown
a lot of big birthday parties
for Ken over the years...
- That's so cute.
- Happy birthday.
All: Aww!
- He look so much like you, Ken.
It's amazing. - Why don't...
[screams and laughter]
- But this I think
he wants something quieter.
It'll just be the two of us.
- What is this?
- Mm-mm.
- Ooh, wow, look at that.
Cheeky. - Do you love it?
- Oh, my goodness me.
I love it. - Do you love it?
- I do.
♪ ♪
I love you. - Oh, thank you.
- I have given my husband
many gifts,
but the greatest gift
I've ever given my husband
is our children.
Oh, and the blow job in the car.
I suppose we can call that...
- Look, Giggy's hair is growing.
Look.
- Giggy's hair
isn't growing back.
- I swear on my life, look.
- It doesn't matter how much...
He's got four hairs.
This is hair that's growing.
If it's competition,
I think you lost.
- Maybe, but he's starting
to grow some hair.
- He's a fluffy puppy
since he came from the pound.
Pound to the palace. Whoo-hoo.
Anyway, so there's lots
going on,
and today I was out looking
at another apartment for Max.
It means so much to me,
as a mother,
to be able to help my kids...
- It's the tenth
we've probably seen, isn't it?
- Yeah.
- You've seen a lot, and...
- How much is this?
- This one's seven.
- We're giving him the deposit,
so he's gotta be able
to pay the mortgage himself...
- Right.
- So it can't get too expensive.
However, before we help them,
we want them to struggle first.
- Right.
- So the challenge is trying
to find something
that he can afford.
- He pays rent
on the apartment now,
so better to have
his own apartment
and pay a small mortgage.
- Mm, yeah.
I've seen Max struggle.
I've seen I'm live
in the grotty apartment.
I even told Max I wouldn't pay
his electricity bill
so he and to take cold showers
and light a candle.
You are a...
- I didn't have electricity
for three months.
- Yeah, but I don't care.
And furnish it,
and we totally surprise him.
- Okay, why not? Let's do it.
- They've proved themselves,
they've worked hard,
so I want my kids to have
a luxurious life now,
and I'm gonna do it for them.
That boy has never asked us
for anything.
I mean is that because
he doesn't want anything
or he doesn't want to ask?
- Ah, I'm not sure.
What about when he
knocked his teeth out?
- Oh, yeah, he asked me
for new teeth.
- Exactly.
- Yeah,
and that cost me 15 grand.
- Exactly.
[both laugh]
[hip-hop music]
♪ ♪
both: Thank you.
♪ ♪
- What a gorgeous view this is.
- Oh, my gosh, yeah, yeah.
- Thank you.
♪ ♪
- Hello, ladies.
Welcome to Knickerbocker.
All: Hi. - Oh, my gosh.
This is so awesome.
Hello, girls! - Hi there.
How are you? - Hello, hello.
Muah. Is this not amazing?
- Can you believe
how gorgeous this view is?
- Oh, my God how beautiful.
- And this gorgeous night?
And here we are with our girls.
We finally get
our girls together.
I don't think any mother
is ever prepared
for their daughter to grow up.
They're still
two and three to me,
and then I look over and I go,
"Oh, my God,
"they're taller than I am.
They're these women."
And so I'm in total denial
about it.
- So how was your day today?
What happened with
your whole modeling thing?
What's going on with that?
- It was so fun.
I had a meeting,
um, and then a couple...
- With CR Fashion Book.
- Yeah.
- How tall are you?
- Like, 5'8".
Like... - You're definitely 5'6".
- Sisters, sisters.
- 5'8 ", 5'8".
- I'm 5'8".
- You look so mad.
- I'm gonna go with 5'7".
- I just got measured
the other day... - I'm 6'0".
- So if you guys
wanna fight about it
take it up with my agent.
- I'm not fighting about it.
[laughter]
- My girls do not hold back.
They will tell you and talk...
I wonder where they get that.
Oh, gee, I don't know.
I'm going to QVC tomorrow,
so the girls are gonna
stay here alone for two nights.
I'm a little worried about it.
- Does Harry know yet?
- Yeah.
- Don't be worried.
- I don't know why
I have anxiety about it.
- No, don't, don't.
- Not even anxiety.
Part of me's terrified,
and part of me goes,
"Hey, that's a good way
to toughen 'em up and get 'em
to figure it all out.
Um, what's the worst thing
that could happen?
They disappear.
[laughs] That'd be pretty bad.
- So you're going
to be here by yourself
in New York City for two days,
what do you have planned?
- We're gonna get
a couple tattoos,
- Oh, my God!
- A nose ring.
- I feel like you can,
go to, like, clubs, right?
I mean...
- No.
- So...
- No.
- [laughs]
I had a lot more freedom
than my children have.
My mom was a lot more trusting.
She was a lot more lenient...
I used to go to Studio 54
with my mom and my sister.
I was 10.
But did I stay
in New York City alone?
No. - She can't get in.
- Yeah.
Coming up...
[gasps] Look who I matched with!
You guys! - Who is that?
- You're scaring the sh...
Out of your mother right now.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Look! Look who I matched with!
You guys! both: What?
- Who did you match with?
- Who?
Who is that? - What?
- Okay, so there's
this dating app.
Just listen. - Are you on it?
- Just listen to me.
You just talk to them.
- You don't go meet them,
do you?
- No, no, no.
It's not only dating.
It's, like... you can form
business relationships,
and you can't get on it unless
you're, like, really special.
- Are you kidding?
That's such a crock of sh...
They're just saying that
so you feel good about yourself.
- They don't understand
the new, like, day and age
'cause it is the 21st century...
- Or maybe because you're 18
talking about getting
35-year-old men.
- I was never...
- But just a thought.
Talking about getting
35-year-old men.
- Just a thought. [chuckles]
- No.
- Oh, really?
- Really.
- Really?
- That's way too old.
- Really?
- How old are you?
- 45.
- Okay.
Well, that's old for me.
[all laughing]
- You're scaring the sh...
Out of your mother right now.
- Biggest crock of sh...
I've ever heard in my life.
- Okay, chill.
- I vote...
- Did you pay for this?
- No.
- Did your parents?
Both: Yes, you did!
- You paid for it?
- How much did you...
- Your parents paid for it.
- How much did I pay for this?
- Tell the truth.
I'm dying to know.
- Are you kidding me?
How much did I pay for this?
You're gonna... you know what?
- $9 a month.
[laughter] - How much?
- Nine.
- Don't you think it sounded
a little sketchy
if it's only $9 a month
and it's like you have to be
famous and rich or whatever?
- No, it's, like, 25.
- How much is it really?
- Oh, you're lying
about this amount?
- Really, how much is it?
- Like, 26.
- 2,600, by the way.
[laughter]
- You guys, I'm telling you...
- Oh, my God. This is not okay.
Listen. I have to go do QVC.
It's a big, big, big deal.
So I need you to tell me
that you guys are gonna
be great here for two days...
- Oh, yeah, I already told you.
- I wanna think
I trust them 100%.
I think they're good girls.
I hope. I'm giving 'em a chance.
I'm giving 'em a shot.
I don't know. I'm nervous
No... just no dating app stuff
while I'm gone. Okay?
- I'm not your mom,
I'm not your dad...
- But how about...
- But no dates in the city.
- Okay. Thank you, Kyle.
[soft dramatic music]
♪ ♪
- I feel after my mother
passed away,
I'm just kind of
in over my head.
It's been a lot of death
in a short amount of time,
and I'm a puddle
and I can't focus
and concentrate,
so I'm just...
You kind of just go...
[exhales]
Therapy, party of one.
I don't meant to keep, you know,
beating a dead horse...
excuse the pun. - Dead horse?
- I'm sorry.
But I just feel like
I'm missing something.
I can't explain it.
- You are missing something.
It's a tremendous loss.
- Hi, sweetie.
- Hi, beautiful.
- Welcome.
Come on. - How are you?
- I'm doing great.
- Good.
- So nice to see you.
- You too.
I'm in this weird situation...
I'm just gonna
jump right in here. - Go for it.
- Where, um, it's become
almost embarrassing
to have lost so many people, and
that seems like a strange thing.
I never would have ever imagined
to have that feeling,
but it's embarrassing
to keep sharing it.
- So you're putting judgment
on your loss and your grief?
- I guess so.
- Like there's a limit
on how many people can die
in a certain amount of time.
- [laughs]
Yes. - Yeah.
- My sister Mary
passed away very suddenly;
four years after that,
my sister Connie passed away;
six weeks later,
my niece Brooke passed away;
six months later,
Vinny's close cousin, Casey,
passed away;
and then his father,
Dick Van Patten,
passed away
six months after that;
and then my brother
six months after that;
and then my mother
a month after that.
I mean, it's just crazy.
I don't understand
why I'm so embarrassed
by people dying in my life.
- Right.
- It's a lot more complicated.
- Yes.
Do you remember the first time
you felt sadness?
- No... [chuckles]
Not the very first time.
- If you had to guess.
- Well, I know
by the time I came around,
'cause I'm the youngest
of seven,
there was a lot of discontent
in the house.
- Okay.
- I think with my parents,
there was just a huge disconnect
between the two of them.
- All right. So...
- And interestingly enough...
Oh, my God.
- Tell me.
- Embarrassed.
- About?
- I was embarrassed
by my parents not getting along.
It was embarrassing that
my parents didn't get along.
It was embarrassing
to have people over
and feel the tension
in the house.
- Right. The embarrassment
gets really hooked up
with the shame,
so if someone
brings up something
that you don't feel good about,
your knee-jerk reaction
is to shame.
- Yeah.
- Yes.
- I don't like making people
feel uncomfortable.
It makes me feel ashamed.
It's just kind of this weird
symbiotic relationship
that I'm just understanding is,
like, kind of pervasive
in my life.
- Don't forget that you're a
soul having a human experience.
If you allow others
to be uncomfortable,
you're really being
authentically you.
Stop making things okay
for everyone else and be you.
- It's... it's
a lose/lose situation anyway
'cause you can't make everything
okay for everybody else.
- Right.
- I do feel a sense of relief
that it's okay to let go
and kind of just,
like, be in the moment
with what I'm feeling.
I think it's definitely a right
and a strong first step.
I feel better already.
Just acknowledging it on...
On that level.
I really do.
- Coming up...
- Don't put your hands
up my skirt
unless you wanna see
what's up there.
- I saw that.
[laughs] - Whoo!
[upbeat music]
[phone ringing]
- Hello?
- Hi, honey, how are you?
- I'm great. You?
- I'm good.
Just trying
to get out of the house.
I'm meeting everybody.
We're going to,
uh, a white party tonight
at PUMP.
I feel like we're both so busy.
Like, I went to New York
and then you're in Mexico
and I'm here and then...
- I know.
We're all over the place.
- Between Mauricio's traveling
and my traveling,
I just feel like life is
completely crazy right now.
- Well, I'm glad you called.
I love you.
I'll see you
in a couple of days.
- Bye, honey. Love you.
♪ ♪
[cell phone line ringing]
- Hello?
- Where all right you?
- Well, I'm coming up.
- Well, I have
a fashion emergency.
You don't happen to have any
nude color extra underwear
in your purse, do you?
- Darling, they would be
way too small for you.
Otherwise,
I would lend them to you.
- [laughs] No, I-I...
They're...
They're showing through.
I'm wearing white with white.
Okay, hurry up. - I'm coming.
Bye. - Okay, bye.
Hi there. - Hey, how are you?
- Hey.
- How are you?
Good to see you.
- How are you, Kyle?
- You're looking nice
both of you.
- Thank you.
- Aw, you look beautiful, Kyle.
- Oh, look what happened.
- You okay?
- It's showing through,
so I'm like...
- So why don't you take it off?
You can take it off because...
- I mean, I'd rather
the underwear show.
- Hello.
Did you get your knickers?
- So funny.
- Over here.
- Cheers.
- Hi, guys.
- Are you going
to the white party then?
- Yes, but I didn't know... I...
Really know it was
a white party.
I always like things
that are fashionable,
stylish, a little over the top.
I'm always gonna give you
that pretty silhouette
and something to look at.
That's just who I am.
- How did you guys not know
that it was a white party?
- I got lucky.
- Just by chance.
- Darling, you were born lucky.
- What're you guys having?
- Vodka Red Bulls.
- I'm having a chardonnay.
It feels more innocent,
but I feel better
when I've had a margarita.
- I want a margarita.
That's what I was gonna have.
- Should we switch
to margaritas?
- I'm starting with that
and I'm ending with that.
- [laughs]
- I couldn't say anything
until today,
but we cast
Alicia Silverstone...
- [gasps]
- Oh, I...
- From "Clueless" to be
playing my mom
in my scripted show.
- That's really good.
- I am so excited for you.
- That is so good.
- And what show is this, Kyle?
- It's a scripted show
that I'm producing...
- Oh, amazing.
- Inspired by my life
growing up in the '70s,
so she'd be playing my mother.
Alicia Silverstone,
just sitting
in the room with her
and meeting with her,
I was thinking,
"This is really crazy."
I feel like someone's gonna,
like, pinch me
and I'm gonna wake up.
- I'm gonna go see Eileen
and her executive producers
for Y&R.
- You're auditioning?
- No, for my birthday,
she gave me, like, a small part.
- Oh, right.
- Do you wanna be on my show?
- F... yeah,
I wanna be on your show!
- [laughs]
- Are you serious?
- Awesome, yeah!
- Oh, my God!
It's kind of exciting...
- How fun.
- And kind of, like, scary
all at the same time
'cause, like,
total fish out of water,
but I just pray I don't,
like, disappoint her
or let anyone down...
- Of course you won't.
- You know,
and just do the best I can.
- Eileen asked me to do it.
- You asked her.
- Can I just have one line?
- No.
I don't have that kind of power.
- Can I have one line?
Just speak to Newman?
- Oh, my God.
- You used to do acting, though,
did you?
- Yeah, like,
with the black and white movies.
- Silent films.
- Yeah, exactly.
- That is so rude.
- That was not.
It's English. Too good.
- Thank you.
- I'm sure it's...
- I don't know why people
don't get the English humor.
- You know what you and I
should do?
Let's get fake British accents
and start insulting people,
and just...
- We don't call it insulting.
We call it self-deprecation.
- Yeah, you don...
- How about we just celebrate
and be nice to one another?
- That's too American, darling.
- I know, but we're in America.
- Okay, maybe it's starting...
- I do think that there's
definitely a fine line.
I think that Americans need
to kind of, like... deep breath.
- You're an American.
What are you talking about?
- And that's what I'm saying.
- You're born in Connecticut.
- Oh, my God.
That's why I can speak
as an American and say...
- Okay.
- Americans need
to take a deep breath.
Chill out. It's funny.
Erika, settle down.
Take a deep breath
for crying out loud.
I had lunch with my husband
the other day
and I said, "You know, Erika's,
like, this beautiful girl.
She's very, very poised.
It's like you've got
this sort of aura about you.
Very, very strong,
a bit guarded.
- I think in life,
you know, when you meet people,
and you meet people
for the first time,
it's best to be cautious.
- A... because you're cynical
or because what... what is it?
- I mean...
- I mean, I just am what I am.
I don't trust everybody.
Friendship is earned.
Respect is earned.
It's not just given.
Sorry. Well, not really.
- Erika, sorry,
but, um, Kyle needs
some underwear.
- I don't have any.
- Oh... oh!
[laughs] - Whoo!
- That's right.
- I saw that.
- Don't put your hands
up my skirt
unless you wanna
see what's up there.
- I saw that.
- Unless you wanna get bit.
- See? Don't take...
Don't push me Miss Vanderpump.
- Oh, my gosh.
- I'll take you there.
- Oh, my God.
- I told you that.
- Why don't you have
any knickers on?
- Because it doesn't look good
under my dress.
I have on a Mugler dress.
Why would I break up
a beautiful design
with an underwear line?
With a panty line?
Really?
- Erika, you're the most
out there person like that.
- Yes, but it's a... it's a pers...
Stage persona.
I'm a... I'm a real,
like, introvert.
- Oh, my God.
- And cover up your snatch
while you're at it.
- My snatch has been covered.
- Come on.
- Nobody really understands.
I'm really an introvert.
- I totally get that.
- Shy, I'm... all of that.
I'm like...
- I'm just not buying it.
Snooty?
A bit. Cold? Frigid?
Yes. Introverted?
No. - Well, come on.
Let's go to this party.
- Okay, come on then.
Let's do it.
♪ ♪
- You know we look
kind of weird all in white...
- Listen, just roll with it, PK.
Just roll.
- Yeah, I'm rolling.
I'm rolling.
- Coming up.
- What a I supposed to say?
- What do you mean?
- "Close you're legs, darling.
I don't like the view"?
I didn't mind the view.
[upbeat music]
- No, mine.
- Hi, guys.
- Hi, my love.
- Jaggs, what's going on?
- Well, I'm start... I'm trying
to feed Jagger lunch,
but he decided to take my lunch.
He's obsessed with my sushi.
- Mine.
- Okay, Mommy will put it
right here.
Yes? I can take credit
or be blamed for this.
I've never ordered something
for Jagger from the kids' menu.
I could order chateaubriand
for Jagger
and he would like it.
- Babe, good party last night.
- That was a fun party.
- Yeah!
- PUMP...
- It was, wasn't it, Jagger?
- Yeah. PUMP was pumping.
- PUMP was pumping.
- The scenery was good.
- It was very glam.
- No, I-I meant all the scenery.
The earlier scenery.
- Oh, my God.
When Vanderpump sticks her hand
up Erika's dress
and discovers she's not wearing
any underwear...
- Kyle needs some underwear.
- I don't have any.
- Oh... oh!
- I thought, immediately,
no big deal.
We all have gone
without any underwear.
- You know, the funny thing is,
I was sitting there
and obviously, you know,
I'm a straight male,
so I noticed quite early on.
- [fussing]
- I knew it wasn't
nude underwear.
- I don't know
how you could sit there.
- I'm never gonna say anything
because it's completely
inappropriate.
- I don't know
if she deliberately
flashed anyone,
but he's a man
for crying out loud.
I completely understand that PK
could not stop staring
at Erika's hooha.
To me, PK, I swear to you,
when I first saw,
I thought she was wearing
nude underwear.
- I was getting hot.
- Like "hot"... aroused "hot"?
- No, not "hot" hot, no.
Under the collar.
Like, embarrassed.
- "Hot" like, "What the f...?
I've had some girl's snatch
staring at me in the face"?
- No, like "hot" as in...
I'm sitting there,
I've gotta focus,
and then I just keep
going like this.
- Do you know what I mean?
It was one of those.
- Just tell me one thing
right now.
- Just sit a different way.
- Did you... were you
a little turned on?
- Not even remotely, babe.
- Just a tiny bit turned on?
- Don't get... honey...
- PK is not going
to say something
when we're within a group
about something
that is so fundamentally
uncomfortable to him.
- What am I supposed to say?
- What do you mean?
- "Close your legs, darling.
I don't like the view"?
I didn't mind the view.
- I know, I know.
I know this.
If I went there in a short skirt
and there was a man
sitting in front of me,
I would do everything
in my power
to make sure
that my legs were crossed
or I'd have a napkin over it
or I'd have a pillow on my lap.
I would do something. - Yeah.
Maybe Erika's bits are available
for the world.
I don't know. - I wanna give her
the benefit of the doubt.
Maybe she didn't have
her most ladylike moment,
but these things happen.
I think Erika's got
a good sense of humor,
so let me have a joke
and have a laugh with her.
- I'm gonna go out
and do some work.
- Right? Right.
- [fussing]
- You can come sit opposite me
with your legs open. - Hold on.
Let me change my outfit.
- [chuckles]
- I need to put something white
and short on.
Next on "The Real Housewives
of Beverly Hills"...
- Lisa is with us today.
- My manufacturer said to me,
"Tell Harry
he never has to work again
a day in his life
if he doesn't want to."
- Are we excited
to get locked up?
All: Yeah! - Oh, God, yes.
- What the hell?
[clangs] [all scream]
- I'm sorry, but isn't it
kind of like, lady 101?
Cross your legs.
- I thought it was underwear
until she said
she wasn't wearing any.
- I saw what Mr. Girardi's
been munching on
for the last 20 years.
[laughs]
- This is a cheeky little gift.
- Oh, these are beautiful.
- Aren't they?
We've all seen
your pretty little puss now.
- I'm gonna give you
some really good advice:
The more you talk about sh...
The worse it gets.
- To learn more
about the Housewives,