The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (2010–…): Season 7, Episode 2 - The Buddha Bentley Birthday - full transcript
Erika auditions dancers for her new music video "Xxpensive." Dorit's extravagant birthday party provides a few surprises, both planned and unplanned. At the party, Lisa Vanderpump shows Lisa Rinna and Eileen exactly where they stand.
- Previously on "The Real
Housewives of Beverly Hills"...
- Happy birthday!
- Yay!
- What?
[laughter]
- Do you want to be on my show?
- F... yeah,
I wanna be on your show!
Are you serious? - Awesome.
- Who the f...
Gets this kind of gift?
- This is Dorit.
- So beautiful.
- Oh, thank you.
So are you. Hi, how are you?
- Hi. Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.
I've heard so much about you
from Boy George.
- What a dump.
- My husband is
a talent manager,
and he manages Boy George.
- My mom, she was
actually saying that
she felt the same as she did
when she was 21 inside.
- I know, but what no one knew
was that you lost your mom
over the reunion. - I know.
- I think the whole thing
with Yolanda
sort of tainted our friendship.
It was almost like we were
divided up into three groups.
It was very strange.
- How she reacts,
it's her thing.
That's not our problem.
When my dad died,
it just changed my outlook
on every single thing.
I don't have time for a whole
lot of bullsh... right now.
- Lisa Rinna
and Lisa Vanderpump,
I'm sure they're gonna be okay
eventually, don't you think?
[upbeat music]
- The crown is heavy, darling.
So just leave it
where it belongs.
♪ ♪
- I may be two people,
but I'm not two-faced.
♪ ♪
- My advice to you:
don't hustle the hustler.
♪ ♪
- I speak no evil
but I see and hear everything.
♪ ♪
- When you've traveled
the world,
you can speak in
any accent you want.
♪ ♪
- I'm an expert on luxury
and I can always spot a fake.
♪ ♪
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
[engine revs]
♪ ♪
- I can't even imagine
how much this car costs.
- I don't like to
think about it actually.
- I know.
- Obviously, Mauricio
bought this car for him.
He goes, "It's for us."
I'm like, "For both of us?"
I'm like, "Mm-hmm, let's see
who's gonna be driving it."
Hilarious.
I do love a sports car,
I'm not gonna lie.
- I love that.
Oh, my God, this car is unreal.
- It's pretty crazy, right?
- Wow.
If Harry brought a Lamborghini
home for the two of us,
I would probably think that
aliens had come
and taken over his body,
because he's
a cheap mother... er.
- I look really tired
from Erika's party.
- Okay.
- My eyes, not good.
- I don't... I can't even take
my glasses off.
I look like a haggard mess.
I am so...
- We went and got, like,
cheeseburgers and french fries.
- Wanna get up and dance?
- No, I'm actually hungry.
- I'm starving.
- You did?
- Yeah, last night.
- I'm so jealous.
- You should have seen all of us
with our outfits in there
ordering cheeseburgers...
- Okay.
- Fries, shakes.
- Which one... which one
did you order, baby?
- The one without onions.
- Dorit was making fun of me
because... [laughs]
I thought I could call ahead
to...
To order the hamburgers
and french fries.
- It's so funny, because I went
to put her name in my phone
and it came out Doritos.
- [laughs]
- I'm not even kidding.
My phone autocorrected it
to Doritos.
[laughter]
[crunches]
- And you haven't seen
Vanderpump at all?
- Just last night.
- Not before then?
You haven't bumped into her,
like...
- No.
- I mean, I bump into you
all the time.
- I know. How weird is that,
we live in a three-mile zone,
you know,
and that we don't
run into each other?
- Right.
- So no, the first time
was last night.
[upbeat techno music]
♪ ♪
- [laughs]
Good boy.
♪ ♪
- It looks fit.
- When I was in my 20s,
Ken bought me a horse
for my birthday,
and he brought it into
the house, into the hallway,
in the middle
of my birthday party.
And I've had a love of horses
ever since.
Okay, you're gonna be
a good boy, okay?
And you're gonna do
what we say, aren't you?
I was fortunate enough
to be invited to the opening
of the Cavalia show,
which is like a Cirque du Soleil
for horses.
Oh, it's just so beautiful.
This show is so extraordinary.
It really is.
And I asked them if ever
they would retire a horse.
And they said, actually, we have
this very handsome boy
coming up for retirement
very soon.
And I said, "Could I have him?"
Oh, his winky's out. Look at.
Put that back in.
We don't have that kind of
relationship.
You put it back.
We're just at first base.
Put it back.
I'm not riding anything else,
might as well get a horse,
right?
- Did you enjoy that?
- I did.
I really love riding him.
Say hello to the big dog.
Yeah, that's enough.
I used to have 15 horses
when we lived in England
and the children were
growing up.
Now, I just have
the two little minis.
And Prince
has come into my life.
You're such a kind boy.
I mean, he really is.
He's just so reliable.
- I know.
- If you ask me, honestly,
do I prefer animals to people,
there's no contest.
All day long.
I think animals are more loyal
than friends sometimes.
Talking about good-natured
and reliable,
what did you think
of last night?
- I enjoyed the party.
- You missed it,
what I said to Rinna.
She came up and I was with Dorit
and she said, "Oh, I'm sure
you've influenced Dorit."
So I said, "No,
why would I do that?"
- Don't listen to her too much.
She might fill you with...
- No, she doesn't.
- That's not true,
but I might give her a hint,
if you catch my meaning.
- All right.
- And then she said something,
"I have a heart!"
And I said I just
haven't seen it lately, Lisa.
- I think that
we were so divided...
- Yeah.
- And everybody got on one thing
and wouldn't get off of it.
- Yep.
- And as I was saying to Eileen,
you know,
once you lose a parent or once
you lose somebody close to you,
for me, just everything changed.
My perspective, it was like,
you know what?
Life's too short.
You have to accept somebody
for who they are
and get on with it.
You can get over it, you can.
- Time. It just takes time.
- It just takes time.
- If Vanderpump is
going to forgive Rinna,
then she has to forgive Eileen.
You either forgive them both
or you hold onto a grudge
with both.
But it wouldn't make sense
if she forgives one,
not the other.
- Dorit seemed to have fun.
- Dorit was having
a good time there last night.
- It would have been very easy
for me to say,
"Dorit, come here.
"Let me tell you what awful,
silly cows they were
and how vicious they were."
I'd liked to have done it,
but I didn't.
Probably should have.
I know one thing for sure
is that whatever trash talk
they talk about me,
she won't listen to it.
We've known too many friends
in common for too many years.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Yeah, but tell me
how you found these places.
I've been here for two years...
- I Google...
- And I cannot find any...
- I Googled it.
♪ ♪
- We went to this
Persian store....
- Yeah.
- And he had this,
and she went to the bakery
in West Hollywood.
It's a pretty Jewish area.
- Neighborhood.
- Neighborhood.
And they have everything.
It's awesome.
- My parents, I don't see them
as much as I'd like.
They live in Connecticut.
I wish my mom and dad
were closer.
Now that I found this store,
I can convince you guys
to stay longer.
'Cause these are the types
of things I can't find,
which make you guys
want to go home.
When we are in Beverly Hills
and we're not traveling,
I would say that I stay within
a five-mile radius.
- Give Daddy some.
- I get stuck in
the Beverly Hills bubble.
I'm very excited you're here
for tomorrow's party.
You know full well
that I know nothing.
So I can only expect that
you're gonna be
as surprised as I am.
I am about to turn 40,
and my husband tells me
he wants to make this party
for me,
and he wants to do it
entirely on his own.
He doesn't want me to know
any details.
- You know the secret?
- He doesn't want you to
have secrets from Mommy.
PK is not very good at detail,
and that's kind of
where I come in,
'cause I'm exceptional at it.
There's no one in the world you
can trust more than your wife.
If I tell you I'm not interested
and I'm not trying
to find out, I'm not.
But make sure, up the stairs,
the candles and the flowers.
That's really important.
- Yeah, yeah, okay. Okay.
- Don't have to tell you about
the lighting. You know that.
- Yeah.
- The entrance and so on.
- Yeah.
- It's driving me crazy until
I know that it's been done
exactly the way I want it done.
PK, I'm so afraid, because
there's so much stuff going on
that someone is going to
say something
and I'm gonna walk in.
I'm not gonna realize that
I don't know it.
- Okay, what you don't
understand is
when I do things,
they're done to precision.
So there's such
a limited amount of people
who actually know
what I'm doing,
that the people you're ever
gonna meet don't even know.
- Oh.
- They're not in the loop.
- I'm starting to have
some indication
that PK might be buying me
a car for my birthday.
- Throwing something out there
in the orbit,
Tiffany blue.
- No. Absolutely...
Absolutely no.
- Okay.
- That color, really,
in my opinion,
shouldn't be on anything
other than a box
with something
really pretty inside.
If he buys me a new car
and now he's on to potentially
a Tiffany blue Maserati...
- What?
- If I saw that
come up the driveway,
I couldn't fake a smile.
- Stay there.
Line. Stay.
- PK, do you have
a surprise for me?
- I do have a little surprise
for you. Stay there.
- Honey, where exactly
is the line?
What if I put a little toe
over the line?
- Stay there.
- What is going on
in this house?
- Honey, come down.
I want you to meet someone.
Come down, bubba.
- Who, baby?
- He's come all the way
from Tombouctou.
- What are you talking about?
[gasps]
Oh, my God.
- Coming up...
- Five, six,
five, six, seven, eight.
- ♪ 'Cause we don't
give a f... ♪
- Hey! [laughter]
[upbeat music]
- What are you talking about?
[gasps]
Oh, my God.
- Happy birthday, baby.
- No. No, PK.
- [laughs]
- No.
- Happy birthday, love.
- No, bubba, no.
- I was thinking,
what's reflective
of Dorit's personality?
And I thought rose-tinted gold.
- [gasps]
- Rachel, what do you think?
- Oh, my God.
- I'm speechless.
- You are the best husband
in the world.
- Thank you.
- Oh, my God, Papa.
- Come on, bub, get inside.
- You can basically
count on a yes
for anything you ask me
for your lifetime.
- Anything?
- Oh, my God!
No! [laughs]
It's so special.
It's so over the top.
- Mum-in-law, sit down.
- Oh, my God.
It's so incredibly thoughtful.
I think I'm the luckiest girl
in the world.
- I can't even...
- Honey, you're good.
You're good to go.
Just keep going.
Turn more... - Oh, my God!
I love this car!
- Turn more to the right.
- It is to the right.
- No, just keep going.
Don't turn the wheel.
Now, turn more
to the right, babe.
All right, straighten up.
You're good.
- I love you!
- Oh, I love you, babe.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- That was fun.
A nice little ride
on the roller coaster.
- Yeah.
- You're gonna love this.
Hi, honey. - Hi.
- You beat us.
- Hi, welcome to LIT Method.
- This is my daughter, Alexia.
Did you know that?
- Hi, nice to meet you.
- Alexia is going to school
in Boston.
Arizona was just not
the right fit for Alexia.
You're gonna have so much fun.
[cries]
- Okay. I love you.
Now that she's home,
I am making a point
to spend as much time
with her as possible
before she leaves
to go back to Boston.
Alexia, Lisa is
gonna be in New York
when Sophia and I go
next week....
- Ooh.
- With her two girls.
- We're gonna be in New York,
while Kyle's in New York.
- All right, so, everyone,
all eyes on me real quick.
When you grab this handle,
I want you to drive
with your legs,
engage your core,
pull with your arms, okay?
- This is the newest thing.
- Okay, I'm doing
the newest thing.
- I live in a town where
everybody looks
unbelievably good.
You would never know
how many kids they have
or how old they are.
They're all freaks of nature.
- Yes, everyone is looking good.
All right, everyone,
keep your eyes on me.
Nice, easy side-to-side strokes.
- Oh, my God, I'm gonna be sore.
I can already tell.
In my 20s and in my 30s
I did everything first.
And now, as I've grown
more mature,
I'm not as desperate.
Even though it might seem
like I am, I'm not.
- Five...
- Oh!
- Four, three,
two, finished.
- Whoo!
- Yeah!
- Whoo!
- All right,
everyone crushed it.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Perfect.
You're like the bang whisperer.
- [laughs]
♪ ♪
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
- Oh, hey, how are you?
- I'm good. How are you?
- These are super painful.
We should probably retire them.
- Okay.
- "The Young and the Restless"
is celebrating
its 11,000th episode.
I mean, that's just
so epic and huge.
- We're rolling.
- Oh, boy.
- Take me back, if you will,
to the very beginning.
- They're doing interviews
with all the cast
about their favorite moments
on the show.
- You're 22
and suddenly you're here
at "The Young and the Restless."
Those early days of Ashley,
what was she like?
- Ashley had just gotten back
from college.
That was my first scene
was with Jerry Douglas,
who played my father.
And my first scenes were in
cowboy boots and jeans
Why didn't you tell me
you were coming so early?
I would have gotten dressed up.
- Oh, really,
and spoil your hip image?
- Oh, this is not hip.
- Oh, casual, chic.
- Hardly.
I think Ashley is all too human.
I have forgotten
most of these things,
so I'm taking this magnificent
walk down memory lane,
going all the way back to 1982.
- We're talking
favorite moments,
'cause we're celebrating
11,000 shows.
I know you have one
from those early days.
- My character had an abortion
in, I think,
the early to mid-'80s.
Do you think it was...
easy for me or something?
It was the hardest decision
I've ever made.
This character was intelligent
and smart and had so much money,
but she was fallible.
And she still is.
If I could write
my own story arc,
I want to do an Erika Jayne
story where I'm like...
Ashley Abbott's going off
across the country
and performs at gay clubs.
There, that's my story.
That was easy.
- You're a champ.
- Nice.
- Of course it is.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Five, six, seven.
- Let's see what these hos
are up to.
- Let me tell you
about the video.
The song is called "Expensive"
and it's a full '80s,
full fantasy, like, blowout.
I want to put, like,
a group of, like,
really bombshell bitches
together, okay?
Well, hello.
[laughs] [cheers and applause]
- So we just finished teaching,
so it's perfect timing.
Okay, so let's do
redheads first.
So Taylor, Kim, and Alex.
- This is my tenth video.
That sounds kind of crazy,
but it's really true.
♪ I'm a princess ♪
♪ Princess, princess, princess ♪
♪ I'm a pretty mess ♪
♪ Pretty mess, pretty mess ♪
♪ Like a painkiller, killer ♪
♪ Like a painkiller ♪
♪ How many f... s do I give? ♪
♪ None ♪
♪ Not one ♪
♪ Zero, zero, zero done ♪
This is a fun song.
It's super sassy,
super Erika Jayne.
I mean, that's really
what "Expensive" means,
and that's really what
this song is about,
and that's really what
the video is about.
I'm not singing ballads.
- Here we go.
[upbeat music]
Five, six,
five, six, seven, eight.
♪ ♪
- ♪ Expensive ♪
♪ 'Cause we don't give a f... ♪
- Hey!
[laughter]
- When I audition dancers,
I'm looking for two things.
Can you nail the steps,
and are you sexy?
I approach things in a...
Kind of an in-your-face way.
My dancers have to do the same.
- I do have to say
this is very difficult.
Now you all have to leave so we
can sit here and talk about you.
[laughter]
- But you're used to that.
- Yeah.
- Thank you all for coming out.
And I know it's hard,
and I know you're sweating,
and I appreciate you
going with the program.
So thank you.
Together: Thank you.
- Wow. Thank you, girls.
[applause]
- The truth is this.
There's only a certain amount of
dancers that work all the time.
So if they're not with
Katy Perry
or they're not with Rihanna,
or they're not...
You know, there's only...
It's a small group.
So those people are the ones
you're usually after.
This girl performed her ass off.
Well, she... well, she performed.
- Yeah.
- She did.
- And she served it hard.
- And she's like...
- She's got...
- Fleshy.
- She's got muscles.
- Right.
- She's fleshy. This one's out
because she's too small.
I've been giving "shows"
since I was three years old
in my family's, like,
living room.
This is, like, everything
that you've dreamed of
right here and now.
- Booty, booty, booty, booty,
small booty.
- Okay, well, I have...
- Do you know what I mean?
- A big ass.
- If I were to get rid
of someone,
I would get rid of her,
and I would do two brunettes
and two blondes.
- This is a nasty crew
right here.
- Okay, so we will do this,
and our work is done
for today here.
- Yay.
- So what I'm gonna do is
I'm gonna call the agents,
let them know about our choices.
- Let 'em know who got the job.
And then we're gonna meet with
Dani Michelle
and the styling team
to go over all of the looks
for the video.
- Are we gonna wear
bathing suits for this?
Are you sticking me in
a bathing suit and heels?
- We're gonna find
the right bathing suit
and the right heels or boots.
[laughter]
- I mean, in my head...
- No, no, no.
I get it. I'm not...
- I feel like it's superhot...
- I'm not arguing.
- You know?
- I'm just saying, sh...
- I mean, it wouldn't be
the first time
you danced in something skimpy
and, you know.
- No, but it will be
the first time I hit a split...
- It's your jeuje.
- In a bikini.
[laughter]
Probably won't be able to walk
for, like, a week or two,
but it'll be okay.
And I... and I still feel
f... ing bad.
- Wah! [laughter]
- It's amazing. All right,
I'll see you guys later.
- Coming up...
- Where does one even find
something like that?
- Where does one find
something like that?
- I'm not telling you.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Okay, so what are you
making us?
- Zucchini pasta.
Delilah will not eat it, but...
♪ ♪
I'd rather have regular pasta.
You gotta break it up a little.
Can you get a big pan?
- Please.
- Please.
- I am raising two teenagers.
I will always see them as babies
and little girls,
and yet, all of a sudden,
they are growing up too fast.
- Does this
make you comfortable?
[laughter]
- Or not.
- There's seeds now.
- Oh, that looks good.
- Yeah, that's all
you know how to do.
- [laughs]
That's my kind of cooking.
My mother was a cook.
But my mother, God love her,
was not a great cook.
Very good, you guys.
- Well, this is what happens
when you've gotta make
your own food.
- I think the only thing
you've ever cooked me
is macaroni and cheese.
- My mom was big on casseroles
with potato chips on top,
every TV dinner known to man,
and Jell-O for my salad.
So you can't do this?
- No, no!
[gasps]
- Oh, God.
- No, Mom, you're breaking it.
- I can't say that I ever
learned how to cook.
I love my mom, but I can't say
that she said,
"Hey, come here and let me teach
you how to make some Spam."
[laughs]
That is very good, Amelia.
- The cheese looks so good.
- Mm.
- Oh, thank you.
- And I don't want
that much cheese.
- It really gets nice
and creamy.
- Oh, I like it.
Okay, listen.
So you need to walk,
and you need to send
a video in of you walking...
- Mm.
- For fashion shows
in September.
Delilah is going to New York.
She is going on castings
and she's meeting photographers,
and it's really exciting.
What did Cindy Crawford
tell you?
She said...
- Some pictures
you're not gonna...
- Some pictures
you're not gonna love.
- She said some pictures
are ugly.
- And you're just gonna
have to deal with it.
- I'm really tired
of this conversation.
- Why, because
it's not about you?
You know, I want Delilah
to have her moment,
and this is typical
Amelia teenage behavior.
But I also am aware enough
that I don't want her to feel
like we're not
paying attention to her.
I wouldn't let Delilah do it
till she was 17.
- No, you didn't.
- I'm letting you do it at 15.
So, hi. Props to that.
- Probably 'cause I was
really ugly when I was 15.
- You were not
really ugly at 15.
- [laughs]
- I was too.
- I was really ugly at 15.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- I trust Dorit not to look,
but I think we want to
black the doors out.
- We're gonna black
all four doors out.
- Yeah, black all four doors
out so she can't see,
and we should black
those doors out as well.
♪ ♪
- Oh.
- Breathe.
- I've got this new
weird little...
It's like a twitch almost.
When I get heated
or I'm nervous...
- Yeah.
- Or...
My nose starts to run.
- That's fun.
- It's such an unpretty look.
When you're not hands-on,
something that
you ordinarily would be,
there's always a little bit of
anxiety that comes with it.
I don't want you to play with it
too much, Charles.
- I'm just getting this...
- 'Cause you know what happens
when you play with it too much,
it just gets like...
- Overdone.
- Yeah, so...
- I'm just getting
that little bend there.
- Because this now...
This doesn't look right.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Whoop. Okay.
♪ ♪
Oh.
A golf cart at a party
is not an unusual situation.
As you know, people in L.A.
do not walk anywhere,
including to the front door.
Hi. Is that for me?
- Yes, it is.
- I'll just take it anyway,
even if it's not.
[upbeat music]
- Hi.
- Hello.
♪ ♪
This feels very sedate
for a PK party.
I'm not sure
this is all there is.
Do you think I have
too much butt out?
- No, you look unbelievable.
You look radiant.
You look gracious.
- Thank you.
- And you look really beautiful,
and you have a nice time.
It's your birthday.
Jagger, what do you think, son?
Yes or no?
- Yes.
- What do they think?
Together: Yes!
- Hey, I heard you won
yesterday.
- Yes.
- Or was it today?
- Yesterday.
- And you were instrumental
in scoring the goal.
- That's my job.
- I mean, of course.
♪ ♪
- Welcome to your party, honey.
- Thank you.
It's so exciting.
It's a very chill vibe.
I do hope that there is
something else
and it's not just us
sitting around having drinks
in the living room.
[laughs] Here's hoping.
- Happy birthday.
You look lovely.
Like an old movie star, darling.
- Oh, thank you.
- That's what I said.
- Yeah.
- Like 1920s.
- Yeah, gorgeous.
- Wait, he said...
- Listen, you're an inspiration
to every woman
that's 40 years old and just
had a baby 4 months ago.
There must be some heavy Spanx
going on there or something.
- No.
- Oh, shut up.
- Oh, my God, I've never
worn Spanx in my entire life.
- Shut up.
- A bodysuit.
- Don't tell another woman that.
- [laughs]
[upbeat music]
- Oh, this is fabulous.
I've been to a lot of parties
in golf carts,
but not like this golf cart.
Like, this is a very fancy one.
These people have some money.
- Hello, hello.
- Hello.
- Hi.
- So are you excited?
- I am. I am.
- So what about the other night,
did you have fun?
- I did. I did.
- Yeah.
- It was really nice of Erika
to invite me to her party.
- Yeah.
- Everyone seemed...
- And she was totally different
to me, totally.
- Who was? Erika?
- Yeah.
She was very warm. - Yeah.
- Thank you for coming!
- Well, thank you
for inviting me.
- My God, of course!
Welcome back to my home.
- Oh, yeah, but I saw that
from all the women.
- I'm not sure Dorit is
seeing the situation
that accurately,
because I thought
Eileen Davidson
was pretty cold to me.
- Cheers. Happy birthday.
- Thank you,
thank you, thank you.
- We're gonna have fun.
- Yay!
- And we're gonna dance.
- Yay!
- And we're gonna sing.
- Yay.
- And we're gonna just, yeah,
celebrate your birthday.
- Yay.
- Ooh, look at all the red.
- So pretty, huh?
- Thank you.
- Thank you very much.
- Hello.
- Hi.
- Oh, yes, hi.
- Hello!
- Lady in red, pretty, pretty.
- Hi, gorgeous.
- How are you? You look great.
- Thank you.
Thank you, thank you.
- You look great. Look at you.
- Look at you.
- I know, everyone looks great.
You look good.
You're skinny.
- No, I'm not.
- Yes, you are.
- Oh, no, I'm not.
- Where does one even find
something like that?
- Where does one find
something like that?
- I'm not telling you...
- I know you're not.
- Any of my secrets.
[dramatic music]
- Why would I even think
you would?
- God only knows.
- Lisa Vanderpump sometimes is
just trying to be funny
and other times she's like...
It's a joke.
- Turn around.
You look good.
- No, I'm not doing anything
you ask me to do.
- You look great.
Just take the compliment.
You look good. Say thank you.
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
- You should be happy.
It's a compliment,
for God's sakes.
Hello. - Welcome.
- Happy birthday.
- Thank you.
Thank you so much.
- You look gorgeous.
What a gorgeous home.
- Thank you.
Welcome to our home.
- We live very close.
- Do you?
- Yes. I've never been up here.
- Might not be a good thing.
- Shut up.
- It might not be a good thing.
- I'm just saying.
- I'm not getting tired
of Vanderpump
taking the piss out of me
because, to me,
it's a step
in the right direction.
It means we're communicating.
I feel that it's progress.
It could be good;
it could be bad.
She's seen both ways. - Okay.
- You've seen both ways.
- But that...
Doesn't that make for
a real strong relationship...
- You've seen both ways.
- I have, I have.
- When you see both sides?
- Tell her that. Yes, it does.
- No, I prefer one side.
- Yes!
- Well, I like the side of Rinna
when she's not calling me
an evil, manipulative bitch.
For sure, that's the side
I could say I prefer.
Yes.
- You okay?
- Yeah. Why wouldn't I be okay?
- I don't know.
- Just English sense of humor.
A little prod, she deserves it.
- You're gonna have a little fun
with this, aren't you?
- A little bit.
How can I otherwise?
I gave them the power to hurt
me, and I'm taking it back.
- Lisa Vanderpump's being
a little dramatic about that.
I mean, I can't see Lisa
giving power to anyone
to do anything.
Is Eileen here?
- Oh, I don't know.
That actually doesn't
concern me that much.
♪ ♪
- Is this it?
- Okay. Yes, it is.
♪ ♪
It seems strange,
after everything that happened
between me and Lisa Vanderpump,
for it to just go away.
In the Hamptons, you said
something very offensive to me.
A friend doesn't say, "Is that
when the affair started?
Is that when it was?"
- Well, what's the big deal
of saying...
- The big way is
when you do it, own it.
Just say I'm sorry.
I'm trying to figure out
how to be okay.
I know Lisa Rinna is, too.
I'm pretty sure we're not gonna
have the same approach.
Hello. - Hi, Eileen.
- How are you, Lisa?
You look beautiful.
- So do you.
- Thank you.
How are you?
- I'm good. I'm busy. I'm happy.
I'm surviving...
- Good.
- In a world that seems
sometimes challenging.
- Yeah?
- I meant to say, um...
I'm sorry.
- Coming up...
- Can I welcome you all to
Dorit's Buddha lounge?
- Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God.
[upbeat music]
- Hello.
- Hi, Eileen.
- How are you, Lisa?
You look beautiful.
- So do you.
- Thank you.
How are you?
- I'm good. I'm busy. I'm happy.
I'm surviving...
- Good.
- In a world that seems
sometimes challenging.
- Yeah?
- I meant to say, um...
I'm sorry.
I heard that your mother died.
- [laughs]
- I only just heard
two days ago.
- Oh, thank you.
At first I thought that
Lisa Vanderpump
is finally about to
apologize to me
for disrespecting me
in the Hamptons.
It's not happening.
And I'm an idiot.
Thank you very much.
I really appreciate that.
It makes other things
seem kind of...
- Trivial?
- Trivial, inconsequential, yes.
- This is what I like to call
the great room.
- I love it.
- And everything is
a work in progress,
because we moved here
two years ago
and J.Lo and Marc Anthony
lived in this house.
- They had this house.
- They had this house,
but anyway... - I love that.
- Anyway...
- Cheers to that.
I know their marriage
didn't last,
that's not such a good thing,
but the house is nice.
- Hello, Vinny. How are you?
- Nice to see you.
- Hi, beautiful.
- Oh, my gosh,
we're both in red.
How are you? Good to see you.
- Good to see you.
Thank you. Let's do a cheers.
Hi! Pretty.
- You look gorgeous.
- You're rocking red,
look at this.
- How are you?
- Love that.
Ladies in red.
- I didn't recognize you.
I was like, who's that girl?
She doesn't have big hair.
- Is George coming?
- Cheers!
- He's not in town?
- George is on tour.
He's playing
in Cincinnati tonight.
- Oh, okay.
- He's on a tour.
- He's here in spirit.
- Oh, yeah.
Oh, but Kyle, he's...
- You'll be able to see him.
- I know.
Well, he lives here
when he's not on tour.
Do you like this, by the way?
Am I okay?
- Yeah, you look great.
- Yeah?
- Honey, I love that jacket.
- It's kinda rock and roll
with a little bit of...
- I love that jacket on you.
- Girlie nurse.
- In your house?
- Oh, yeah.
- I'm bummed out that Boy George
is not gonna be at
Dorit's birthday party.
I wanted to borrow his eyeliner.
He is a really good
makeup artist.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Hello!
- How are you?
- Good. How are you?
- Nice to see you.
- It was so fun the other night.
- Did you have fun?
- Thank you, so fun.
- How are you?
- I see Erika walk in
and she's wearing a T-shirt,
and I can't help
but think to myself,
well, what about your dress?
Aren't you gonna change?
I mean, the invitation,
I think it said, stunning.
- You don't know that
my "T-shirt" dress
just came off the Moschino
runway, but okay.
Thank you for having me.
I got you just something small.
- Oh, my goodness.
- This is for you.
- Thank you so much.
- This is what her small is.
- Thank you.
- And if you hate it,
here's the receipt. - Aah!
- You're so a girl
after my own heart.
- You look beautiful.
- Thank you.
- Happy birthday.
- Thank you, same to you.
- Thank you for coming
to my birthday.
- Oh, my goodness.
- Your party was fun.
- I'm giving Dorit this
really cute Chanel,
like, cosmetic bag.
Actually, I wanted it
for myself.
I tried to buy two,
but she... they only had one.
- He wore ripped jeans tonight,
Vinny. I said, "Don't do that."
- Vinny can do
whatever he wants.
- He goes, "I am a real person.
This is what I'm wearing."
- Guys can do that.
They throw on a blazer.
My husband's like,
"No, I'm wearing this."
- Eileen.
- I'm like, "Honey,
you can't wear ripped jeans."
He goes, "Yes, I can."
- Nobody's looking at his pants.
They're looking at his face.
- No. He's so hot. It's okay.
- No one's looking at his pants.
[upbeat music]
- Lisa, I have to
tell you something.
When you first came over
and offered condolences,
I thought you were saying,
I just wanted to apologize.
And I went... - Again?
- That's why...
That's why I got that...
- Are you out of your mind?
- That's why I had
that reaction.
- Never going to apologize...
- No, no, shut up.
- One more time. Shut up?
- I thought
that's what you said.
Clearly my reaction when she
apologized was inappropriate...
[laughs]
Considering what she was
apologizing for.
I just don't want
any misunderstandings
with Lisa Vanderpump, period.
I didn't know you were
offering condolences.
I thought you were saying...
- Of course.
- I didn't know that.
I thought you were saying
I just want to apologize,
and that's why I went...
- That's not gonna happen.
- I get that.
I'm not waiting for it.
- Okay, okay, good.
- I'm not waiting for it.
- Hell would freeze over
before I will apologize to
Eileen Davidson again.
- You guys are getting along.
- What?
- You're getting along.
- Shut up with all of that.
It's just like being polite.
- Yeah, but being polite
is the first step.
- Oh, please, what do you know
about being polite.
- It's better than
a kick in the ass.
I'm polite.
- Since when? Since when?
- I'm a lot more polite
than you.
I just think, overall,
I'm more polite than Lisa.
Lisa can get a little...
a little rude sometimes.
- I'm Dorit's mom.
- Oh, hello. Hi.
Nice to meet you, too.
- Dorit's mom?
- Yes.
- So nice to meet you. Kyle.
- Nice to meet you.
- Very nice to meet you.
- Yes.
- My husband, Shalom.
- How are you?
- Oh, hello.
- Hi.
- Nice to meet you.
- Hello, nice to meet you.
- Well, you did a very good job
raising your daughter.
- Thank you, darling.
- She's lovely.
- Thank you very much.
- Thank you.
- Dorit.
Come with me. Come with me.
Come, come. Hello!
- Oh, my gosh.
- Hello.
- Stand next to me.
Just stand next to me, will you?
- Welcome.
- I'm so nervous.
- Anyone who really knows us,
knows that I don't really
do things like this.
Too low-profile, too boring.
- Oh, shoot.
- So can we have the lights out?
- Oh, my God.
I'm so excited that
there's more to this party
but I have no idea
what to expect.
- And can I welcome you all
to Dorit's Buddha lounge?
- Whoo-hoo!
- Oh, my!
- Very cool.
- Happy birthday, darling.
- Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God.
- Coming up...
- I can't find my husband.
I'm gonna go track him down.
- I saw him;
he was in the corner
with his head up
somebody's skirt.
- Can I welcome you all
to Dorit's Buddha lounge?
- Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God.
- Oh.
[cheers and applause]
- Wow.
Wow, oh, my God.
- Oh, my God.
The lights, the music,
the colors,
I mean, how on earth
he was able to create
what he created in our backyard
is astounding.
There's nothing in this party
I could have done better.
- You approve?
- It's beautiful.
You did a beautiful job.
- Thanks, darling.
- This is great.
- Good job.
- Thank you.
- Yeah, you're welcome.
This is really handsome. - Wow.
- I think PK's doing a great
job with this birthday party.
I mean, it's red.
There's, like, smoke
and, like, an ice sculpture
and sh...
I'm down.
- Look the picture of her
over there.
How sweet. - Aw.
- Wow, look at that
sexy room back there.
40th birthday party on fleek.
- This is your private...
- Oh, my God.
- This is your private lounge.
- Oh, my God.
- Lisa, I thought you'd approve.
- I love it.
- Oh, my God.
Look at the wall of roses.
- Oh, my God.
It is so beautiful.
- Happy birthday, darling.
Oh, this is fabulous.
PK has really outdone himself.
We weren't just gonna
stand in a room
with little atmosphere.
I knew something big
was going on out there.
[upbeat dance music]
♪ ♪
- I'm staring at a big,
huge picture of myself.
- That's my new artist.
That's the guy who did
Boy George at Goldie Hawn's.
- Oh, you're kidding.
- No, he painted it.
- Oh, no.
- [laughs]
- It was going so well.
- Just to torture you
a little bit.
- Remember, this is the person
you said was evil.
I'm the evil one.
Suddenly Rinna wants me
as her dance partner.
No, life doesn't work like that.
We have to address
a couple of these things
if we're gonna move on.
- In the end, I like you more
than I don't like you.
- Well, I don't know that I'm
going to give you
that second chance.
- Well, you don't have to.
I'm just saying how I feel.
You can do whatever you want.
I'm never gonna get an apology
from Lisa Vanderpump.
Ever.
So why expect one?
But I forgive her.
Now, I can move on.
She can do whatever she wants.
I forgive her.
What would you like
to do with me,
and then what are you going to
do with me?
- I'd like a f... ing apology.
- I'm sorry for treating you
and being hard on you.
I was hard on you.
So I will apologize to you
for that.
I'm sorry for being so hard
on you.
And I'm not proud of it.
- Okay, let's move on.
- Can we?
- I can. With you.
- Really?
- Yeah.
I never thought I'd actually get
an apology from Rinna
So this just modicum of remorse
gives me some little bit of hope
for the future.
[upbeat dance music]
- Are you still drinking water?
- I'm drinking water.
- Get on it, girl.
- What?
- Have a glass of champagne.
- No, no. I've been vomiting for
the last two days.
- Why?
- No.
- 'Cause I caught a stomach
virus.
♪ ♪
- One, two, three.
Oh, spectacular.
- Vinny, do you
know how to do this?
- Come on, Vinny.
- Get it.
- He got it.
- Vinny, what happened?
Did you turn my whole phone off?
- [laughs]
- You know what,
I can't take you anywhere.
♪ ♪
- You feed her.
I can't feed her.
- You can feed me. You've
known me since I was a child.
- [laughs]
- This is the most action
he's had in weeks.
- [laughs]
- I love the fact that PK and I
have mutual friends.
And there's definitely something
that kind of bonds you
when you're here
from another country.
Can I just wipe my hands
on your T-shirt?
- Sure, sure. [laughs]
Oh, thank you.
♪ ♪
- 2004, '5, '6, '7
were my years of excess.
And I was like
dinner every night,
drinking, gambling,
doing all the things.
To be quite honest with you,
now I look back
and everything happens
for a reason
because for me, I now know
I would have died,
and kind of Dorit's
a big part of my survival,
you know, she really is.
- Whatever works for you.
- How did you guys meet?
- We met very randomly
in a bar in New York.
- Really?
- Amazing.
- I killed her with my banter.
Banter in English
means chitchat.
- We know what it means,
damn it.
- It means the same thing to us.
- We're American.
We're not that stupid.
- [laughs]
- Actually, Lucy,
it's so good to see you.
I've had a bit of a hard time
over here. - [chuckles]
- No, I've had a bit of
a hard time here.
Some of the Americans
don't get my humor.
You know how in England
you take the piss,
and you can kind of like...
Nothing's off limits.
- Yes. You can't do it here.
- Step over the line.
- I get into trouble.
I love American humor because
I live here and I love America.
However, the British humor
is very different.
It's way more aggressive.
Can actually get you in a little
bit of trouble sometimes.
[upbeat techno music]
♪ ♪
- This is so good.
- Where are your babies?
Are they sleeping upstairs?
- They are.
This is my son's room here,
and I moved him
into my daughter's room.
But I know that my...
My kids are down.
They're down
and they're upstairs.
Hello, temptress. - Yes.
- How are you, baby?
What's your take on this
fabulous club that we have here?
- I think I'd stay married to
him, love.
- I'm really glad
you guys are here.
- I know.
I just gonna find my husband.
I'm gonna go track him down.
Have you seen him anywhere?
- That's funny,
we have to get tracking devices.
- Yeah, I saw him,
he was in the corner
with his head up
somebody's skirt.
- [sighs]
I don't think so.
- Oh, it was a joke. I'm sorry.
I hope I didn't
offend her really... ish.
[dramatic music]
- Coming up...
- Baby, this isn't
gonna be easy for me
the next 30 seconds.
- Oh, God.
[upbeat dance music]
- Ladies and gentlemen,
can I encourage everybody
to come to the dance floor?
Honey, this is a chair for you.
- Oh, God.
- Okay, so if you can
crack the room,
I'd like that chair
just behind the light
and I'd like you to sit in it.
Baby, this isn't
gonna be easy for me
the next 30 seconds.
- Oh, God, honey.
- My darling Dorit.
As I stand here tonight
welcoming our friends
and family,
it's an opportunity for me
to confess publicly
what most people already know.
You're the reason...
- Oh, baby.
- You're the reason
for my strength.
It's you, baby, and you alone.
Let's go through this world
together in love.
Before I met you,
I never knew what it was
to smile for no reason.
I can conquer the world
with just one hand,
as long as you're holding
the other one.
I love you, baby.
Happy birthday.
[cheers and applause]
[chuckles]
- I loved PK's speech.
Oh, he's just got such...
Such a beautiful way of...
Showing his love to me.
He totally outdid himself.
- All right, let's party.
[cheering]
[upbeat dance music]
♪ ♪
- How were your conversations
with LVP?
- Mine?
Fine.
- You'd give it an F for fine.
Not an F for failure.
And F for fine.
- F for fine.
I think that's as good
as it's gonna get
with Lisa Vanderpump.
I'm really hoping
this is now closure
and we're moving forward.
No, F for fine.
- Are we well?
- Well.
I was looking for Vinny...
She said, "Well, I saw him
in the corner,
and he had his head up
somebody's skirt."
- Oh.
- What?
- Yeah. No, not kidding.
Okay... - Eileen.
- I gotta go.
- Wait, hold on. Hold on.
- Wait, she said that?
- Come on, come on.
- I'm not kidding.
- She said that?
- Yeah.
Because she's f... ing funny!
I could take a joke.
I think I've got
a really good sense of humor.
I also think I have
a pretty good idea
who Lisa Vanderpump is and I
don't think this "British humor"
is quite exactly
what she's saying it is.
I think it's a little loaded.
- What did you say to her back?
- I said ha-ha,
and then I walked away.
- I had such high hopes.
- I guess I'm not having
a cake this year.
- Next on "The Real Housewives
of Beverly Hills"...
[dog sneezes] - Oh!
- Wait.
- No, no, no, Lisa.
- Oh, Lisa.
- Don't do that, no.
- If I stuck a pole up his ass,
I could probably do the floor,
as well.
- Okay,
so there's this dating app.
- Dating app?
- And you can't get on it
unless you're like,
really special.
- Are you kidding?
That's such a crock of sh...
- You all right?
- No.
- Oh.
- It's the last time
we're going to be there,
and it's saying good-bye
to everything that was her.
Let me just take a second.
- Erika,
Kyle needs some underwear.
- I don't have any.
- Oh, oh!
Oh. [laughter]
- I think that Americans
need to kind of like...
- What are you talking about?
- That's what I'm saying.
- You're born in Connecticut.
- Erika, settle down.
Take a deep breath,
for crying out loud.
- To learn more about
the Housewives,
Housewives of Beverly Hills"...
- Happy birthday!
- Yay!
- What?
[laughter]
- Do you want to be on my show?
- F... yeah,
I wanna be on your show!
Are you serious? - Awesome.
- Who the f...
Gets this kind of gift?
- This is Dorit.
- So beautiful.
- Oh, thank you.
So are you. Hi, how are you?
- Hi. Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.
I've heard so much about you
from Boy George.
- What a dump.
- My husband is
a talent manager,
and he manages Boy George.
- My mom, she was
actually saying that
she felt the same as she did
when she was 21 inside.
- I know, but what no one knew
was that you lost your mom
over the reunion. - I know.
- I think the whole thing
with Yolanda
sort of tainted our friendship.
It was almost like we were
divided up into three groups.
It was very strange.
- How she reacts,
it's her thing.
That's not our problem.
When my dad died,
it just changed my outlook
on every single thing.
I don't have time for a whole
lot of bullsh... right now.
- Lisa Rinna
and Lisa Vanderpump,
I'm sure they're gonna be okay
eventually, don't you think?
[upbeat music]
- The crown is heavy, darling.
So just leave it
where it belongs.
♪ ♪
- I may be two people,
but I'm not two-faced.
♪ ♪
- My advice to you:
don't hustle the hustler.
♪ ♪
- I speak no evil
but I see and hear everything.
♪ ♪
- When you've traveled
the world,
you can speak in
any accent you want.
♪ ♪
- I'm an expert on luxury
and I can always spot a fake.
♪ ♪
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
[engine revs]
♪ ♪
- I can't even imagine
how much this car costs.
- I don't like to
think about it actually.
- I know.
- Obviously, Mauricio
bought this car for him.
He goes, "It's for us."
I'm like, "For both of us?"
I'm like, "Mm-hmm, let's see
who's gonna be driving it."
Hilarious.
I do love a sports car,
I'm not gonna lie.
- I love that.
Oh, my God, this car is unreal.
- It's pretty crazy, right?
- Wow.
If Harry brought a Lamborghini
home for the two of us,
I would probably think that
aliens had come
and taken over his body,
because he's
a cheap mother... er.
- I look really tired
from Erika's party.
- Okay.
- My eyes, not good.
- I don't... I can't even take
my glasses off.
I look like a haggard mess.
I am so...
- We went and got, like,
cheeseburgers and french fries.
- Wanna get up and dance?
- No, I'm actually hungry.
- I'm starving.
- You did?
- Yeah, last night.
- I'm so jealous.
- You should have seen all of us
with our outfits in there
ordering cheeseburgers...
- Okay.
- Fries, shakes.
- Which one... which one
did you order, baby?
- The one without onions.
- Dorit was making fun of me
because... [laughs]
I thought I could call ahead
to...
To order the hamburgers
and french fries.
- It's so funny, because I went
to put her name in my phone
and it came out Doritos.
- [laughs]
- I'm not even kidding.
My phone autocorrected it
to Doritos.
[laughter]
[crunches]
- And you haven't seen
Vanderpump at all?
- Just last night.
- Not before then?
You haven't bumped into her,
like...
- No.
- I mean, I bump into you
all the time.
- I know. How weird is that,
we live in a three-mile zone,
you know,
and that we don't
run into each other?
- Right.
- So no, the first time
was last night.
[upbeat techno music]
♪ ♪
- [laughs]
Good boy.
♪ ♪
- It looks fit.
- When I was in my 20s,
Ken bought me a horse
for my birthday,
and he brought it into
the house, into the hallway,
in the middle
of my birthday party.
And I've had a love of horses
ever since.
Okay, you're gonna be
a good boy, okay?
And you're gonna do
what we say, aren't you?
I was fortunate enough
to be invited to the opening
of the Cavalia show,
which is like a Cirque du Soleil
for horses.
Oh, it's just so beautiful.
This show is so extraordinary.
It really is.
And I asked them if ever
they would retire a horse.
And they said, actually, we have
this very handsome boy
coming up for retirement
very soon.
And I said, "Could I have him?"
Oh, his winky's out. Look at.
Put that back in.
We don't have that kind of
relationship.
You put it back.
We're just at first base.
Put it back.
I'm not riding anything else,
might as well get a horse,
right?
- Did you enjoy that?
- I did.
I really love riding him.
Say hello to the big dog.
Yeah, that's enough.
I used to have 15 horses
when we lived in England
and the children were
growing up.
Now, I just have
the two little minis.
And Prince
has come into my life.
You're such a kind boy.
I mean, he really is.
He's just so reliable.
- I know.
- If you ask me, honestly,
do I prefer animals to people,
there's no contest.
All day long.
I think animals are more loyal
than friends sometimes.
Talking about good-natured
and reliable,
what did you think
of last night?
- I enjoyed the party.
- You missed it,
what I said to Rinna.
She came up and I was with Dorit
and she said, "Oh, I'm sure
you've influenced Dorit."
So I said, "No,
why would I do that?"
- Don't listen to her too much.
She might fill you with...
- No, she doesn't.
- That's not true,
but I might give her a hint,
if you catch my meaning.
- All right.
- And then she said something,
"I have a heart!"
And I said I just
haven't seen it lately, Lisa.
- I think that
we were so divided...
- Yeah.
- And everybody got on one thing
and wouldn't get off of it.
- Yep.
- And as I was saying to Eileen,
you know,
once you lose a parent or once
you lose somebody close to you,
for me, just everything changed.
My perspective, it was like,
you know what?
Life's too short.
You have to accept somebody
for who they are
and get on with it.
You can get over it, you can.
- Time. It just takes time.
- It just takes time.
- If Vanderpump is
going to forgive Rinna,
then she has to forgive Eileen.
You either forgive them both
or you hold onto a grudge
with both.
But it wouldn't make sense
if she forgives one,
not the other.
- Dorit seemed to have fun.
- Dorit was having
a good time there last night.
- It would have been very easy
for me to say,
"Dorit, come here.
"Let me tell you what awful,
silly cows they were
and how vicious they were."
I'd liked to have done it,
but I didn't.
Probably should have.
I know one thing for sure
is that whatever trash talk
they talk about me,
she won't listen to it.
We've known too many friends
in common for too many years.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Yeah, but tell me
how you found these places.
I've been here for two years...
- I Google...
- And I cannot find any...
- I Googled it.
♪ ♪
- We went to this
Persian store....
- Yeah.
- And he had this,
and she went to the bakery
in West Hollywood.
It's a pretty Jewish area.
- Neighborhood.
- Neighborhood.
And they have everything.
It's awesome.
- My parents, I don't see them
as much as I'd like.
They live in Connecticut.
I wish my mom and dad
were closer.
Now that I found this store,
I can convince you guys
to stay longer.
'Cause these are the types
of things I can't find,
which make you guys
want to go home.
When we are in Beverly Hills
and we're not traveling,
I would say that I stay within
a five-mile radius.
- Give Daddy some.
- I get stuck in
the Beverly Hills bubble.
I'm very excited you're here
for tomorrow's party.
You know full well
that I know nothing.
So I can only expect that
you're gonna be
as surprised as I am.
I am about to turn 40,
and my husband tells me
he wants to make this party
for me,
and he wants to do it
entirely on his own.
He doesn't want me to know
any details.
- You know the secret?
- He doesn't want you to
have secrets from Mommy.
PK is not very good at detail,
and that's kind of
where I come in,
'cause I'm exceptional at it.
There's no one in the world you
can trust more than your wife.
If I tell you I'm not interested
and I'm not trying
to find out, I'm not.
But make sure, up the stairs,
the candles and the flowers.
That's really important.
- Yeah, yeah, okay. Okay.
- Don't have to tell you about
the lighting. You know that.
- Yeah.
- The entrance and so on.
- Yeah.
- It's driving me crazy until
I know that it's been done
exactly the way I want it done.
PK, I'm so afraid, because
there's so much stuff going on
that someone is going to
say something
and I'm gonna walk in.
I'm not gonna realize that
I don't know it.
- Okay, what you don't
understand is
when I do things,
they're done to precision.
So there's such
a limited amount of people
who actually know
what I'm doing,
that the people you're ever
gonna meet don't even know.
- Oh.
- They're not in the loop.
- I'm starting to have
some indication
that PK might be buying me
a car for my birthday.
- Throwing something out there
in the orbit,
Tiffany blue.
- No. Absolutely...
Absolutely no.
- Okay.
- That color, really,
in my opinion,
shouldn't be on anything
other than a box
with something
really pretty inside.
If he buys me a new car
and now he's on to potentially
a Tiffany blue Maserati...
- What?
- If I saw that
come up the driveway,
I couldn't fake a smile.
- Stay there.
Line. Stay.
- PK, do you have
a surprise for me?
- I do have a little surprise
for you. Stay there.
- Honey, where exactly
is the line?
What if I put a little toe
over the line?
- Stay there.
- What is going on
in this house?
- Honey, come down.
I want you to meet someone.
Come down, bubba.
- Who, baby?
- He's come all the way
from Tombouctou.
- What are you talking about?
[gasps]
Oh, my God.
- Coming up...
- Five, six,
five, six, seven, eight.
- ♪ 'Cause we don't
give a f... ♪
- Hey! [laughter]
[upbeat music]
- What are you talking about?
[gasps]
Oh, my God.
- Happy birthday, baby.
- No. No, PK.
- [laughs]
- No.
- Happy birthday, love.
- No, bubba, no.
- I was thinking,
what's reflective
of Dorit's personality?
And I thought rose-tinted gold.
- [gasps]
- Rachel, what do you think?
- Oh, my God.
- I'm speechless.
- You are the best husband
in the world.
- Thank you.
- Oh, my God, Papa.
- Come on, bub, get inside.
- You can basically
count on a yes
for anything you ask me
for your lifetime.
- Anything?
- Oh, my God!
No! [laughs]
It's so special.
It's so over the top.
- Mum-in-law, sit down.
- Oh, my God.
It's so incredibly thoughtful.
I think I'm the luckiest girl
in the world.
- I can't even...
- Honey, you're good.
You're good to go.
Just keep going.
Turn more... - Oh, my God!
I love this car!
- Turn more to the right.
- It is to the right.
- No, just keep going.
Don't turn the wheel.
Now, turn more
to the right, babe.
All right, straighten up.
You're good.
- I love you!
- Oh, I love you, babe.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- That was fun.
A nice little ride
on the roller coaster.
- Yeah.
- You're gonna love this.
Hi, honey. - Hi.
- You beat us.
- Hi, welcome to LIT Method.
- This is my daughter, Alexia.
Did you know that?
- Hi, nice to meet you.
- Alexia is going to school
in Boston.
Arizona was just not
the right fit for Alexia.
You're gonna have so much fun.
[cries]
- Okay. I love you.
Now that she's home,
I am making a point
to spend as much time
with her as possible
before she leaves
to go back to Boston.
Alexia, Lisa is
gonna be in New York
when Sophia and I go
next week....
- Ooh.
- With her two girls.
- We're gonna be in New York,
while Kyle's in New York.
- All right, so, everyone,
all eyes on me real quick.
When you grab this handle,
I want you to drive
with your legs,
engage your core,
pull with your arms, okay?
- This is the newest thing.
- Okay, I'm doing
the newest thing.
- I live in a town where
everybody looks
unbelievably good.
You would never know
how many kids they have
or how old they are.
They're all freaks of nature.
- Yes, everyone is looking good.
All right, everyone,
keep your eyes on me.
Nice, easy side-to-side strokes.
- Oh, my God, I'm gonna be sore.
I can already tell.
In my 20s and in my 30s
I did everything first.
And now, as I've grown
more mature,
I'm not as desperate.
Even though it might seem
like I am, I'm not.
- Five...
- Oh!
- Four, three,
two, finished.
- Whoo!
- Yeah!
- Whoo!
- All right,
everyone crushed it.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Perfect.
You're like the bang whisperer.
- [laughs]
♪ ♪
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
- Oh, hey, how are you?
- I'm good. How are you?
- These are super painful.
We should probably retire them.
- Okay.
- "The Young and the Restless"
is celebrating
its 11,000th episode.
I mean, that's just
so epic and huge.
- We're rolling.
- Oh, boy.
- Take me back, if you will,
to the very beginning.
- They're doing interviews
with all the cast
about their favorite moments
on the show.
- You're 22
and suddenly you're here
at "The Young and the Restless."
Those early days of Ashley,
what was she like?
- Ashley had just gotten back
from college.
That was my first scene
was with Jerry Douglas,
who played my father.
And my first scenes were in
cowboy boots and jeans
Why didn't you tell me
you were coming so early?
I would have gotten dressed up.
- Oh, really,
and spoil your hip image?
- Oh, this is not hip.
- Oh, casual, chic.
- Hardly.
I think Ashley is all too human.
I have forgotten
most of these things,
so I'm taking this magnificent
walk down memory lane,
going all the way back to 1982.
- We're talking
favorite moments,
'cause we're celebrating
11,000 shows.
I know you have one
from those early days.
- My character had an abortion
in, I think,
the early to mid-'80s.
Do you think it was...
easy for me or something?
It was the hardest decision
I've ever made.
This character was intelligent
and smart and had so much money,
but she was fallible.
And she still is.
If I could write
my own story arc,
I want to do an Erika Jayne
story where I'm like...
Ashley Abbott's going off
across the country
and performs at gay clubs.
There, that's my story.
That was easy.
- You're a champ.
- Nice.
- Of course it is.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Five, six, seven.
- Let's see what these hos
are up to.
- Let me tell you
about the video.
The song is called "Expensive"
and it's a full '80s,
full fantasy, like, blowout.
I want to put, like,
a group of, like,
really bombshell bitches
together, okay?
Well, hello.
[laughs] [cheers and applause]
- So we just finished teaching,
so it's perfect timing.
Okay, so let's do
redheads first.
So Taylor, Kim, and Alex.
- This is my tenth video.
That sounds kind of crazy,
but it's really true.
♪ I'm a princess ♪
♪ Princess, princess, princess ♪
♪ I'm a pretty mess ♪
♪ Pretty mess, pretty mess ♪
♪ Like a painkiller, killer ♪
♪ Like a painkiller ♪
♪ How many f... s do I give? ♪
♪ None ♪
♪ Not one ♪
♪ Zero, zero, zero done ♪
This is a fun song.
It's super sassy,
super Erika Jayne.
I mean, that's really
what "Expensive" means,
and that's really what
this song is about,
and that's really what
the video is about.
I'm not singing ballads.
- Here we go.
[upbeat music]
Five, six,
five, six, seven, eight.
♪ ♪
- ♪ Expensive ♪
♪ 'Cause we don't give a f... ♪
- Hey!
[laughter]
- When I audition dancers,
I'm looking for two things.
Can you nail the steps,
and are you sexy?
I approach things in a...
Kind of an in-your-face way.
My dancers have to do the same.
- I do have to say
this is very difficult.
Now you all have to leave so we
can sit here and talk about you.
[laughter]
- But you're used to that.
- Yeah.
- Thank you all for coming out.
And I know it's hard,
and I know you're sweating,
and I appreciate you
going with the program.
So thank you.
Together: Thank you.
- Wow. Thank you, girls.
[applause]
- The truth is this.
There's only a certain amount of
dancers that work all the time.
So if they're not with
Katy Perry
or they're not with Rihanna,
or they're not...
You know, there's only...
It's a small group.
So those people are the ones
you're usually after.
This girl performed her ass off.
Well, she... well, she performed.
- Yeah.
- She did.
- And she served it hard.
- And she's like...
- She's got...
- Fleshy.
- She's got muscles.
- Right.
- She's fleshy. This one's out
because she's too small.
I've been giving "shows"
since I was three years old
in my family's, like,
living room.
This is, like, everything
that you've dreamed of
right here and now.
- Booty, booty, booty, booty,
small booty.
- Okay, well, I have...
- Do you know what I mean?
- A big ass.
- If I were to get rid
of someone,
I would get rid of her,
and I would do two brunettes
and two blondes.
- This is a nasty crew
right here.
- Okay, so we will do this,
and our work is done
for today here.
- Yay.
- So what I'm gonna do is
I'm gonna call the agents,
let them know about our choices.
- Let 'em know who got the job.
And then we're gonna meet with
Dani Michelle
and the styling team
to go over all of the looks
for the video.
- Are we gonna wear
bathing suits for this?
Are you sticking me in
a bathing suit and heels?
- We're gonna find
the right bathing suit
and the right heels or boots.
[laughter]
- I mean, in my head...
- No, no, no.
I get it. I'm not...
- I feel like it's superhot...
- I'm not arguing.
- You know?
- I'm just saying, sh...
- I mean, it wouldn't be
the first time
you danced in something skimpy
and, you know.
- No, but it will be
the first time I hit a split...
- It's your jeuje.
- In a bikini.
[laughter]
Probably won't be able to walk
for, like, a week or two,
but it'll be okay.
And I... and I still feel
f... ing bad.
- Wah! [laughter]
- It's amazing. All right,
I'll see you guys later.
- Coming up...
- Where does one even find
something like that?
- Where does one find
something like that?
- I'm not telling you.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Okay, so what are you
making us?
- Zucchini pasta.
Delilah will not eat it, but...
♪ ♪
I'd rather have regular pasta.
You gotta break it up a little.
Can you get a big pan?
- Please.
- Please.
- I am raising two teenagers.
I will always see them as babies
and little girls,
and yet, all of a sudden,
they are growing up too fast.
- Does this
make you comfortable?
[laughter]
- Or not.
- There's seeds now.
- Oh, that looks good.
- Yeah, that's all
you know how to do.
- [laughs]
That's my kind of cooking.
My mother was a cook.
But my mother, God love her,
was not a great cook.
Very good, you guys.
- Well, this is what happens
when you've gotta make
your own food.
- I think the only thing
you've ever cooked me
is macaroni and cheese.
- My mom was big on casseroles
with potato chips on top,
every TV dinner known to man,
and Jell-O for my salad.
So you can't do this?
- No, no!
[gasps]
- Oh, God.
- No, Mom, you're breaking it.
- I can't say that I ever
learned how to cook.
I love my mom, but I can't say
that she said,
"Hey, come here and let me teach
you how to make some Spam."
[laughs]
That is very good, Amelia.
- The cheese looks so good.
- Mm.
- Oh, thank you.
- And I don't want
that much cheese.
- It really gets nice
and creamy.
- Oh, I like it.
Okay, listen.
So you need to walk,
and you need to send
a video in of you walking...
- Mm.
- For fashion shows
in September.
Delilah is going to New York.
She is going on castings
and she's meeting photographers,
and it's really exciting.
What did Cindy Crawford
tell you?
She said...
- Some pictures
you're not gonna...
- Some pictures
you're not gonna love.
- She said some pictures
are ugly.
- And you're just gonna
have to deal with it.
- I'm really tired
of this conversation.
- Why, because
it's not about you?
You know, I want Delilah
to have her moment,
and this is typical
Amelia teenage behavior.
But I also am aware enough
that I don't want her to feel
like we're not
paying attention to her.
I wouldn't let Delilah do it
till she was 17.
- No, you didn't.
- I'm letting you do it at 15.
So, hi. Props to that.
- Probably 'cause I was
really ugly when I was 15.
- You were not
really ugly at 15.
- [laughs]
- I was too.
- I was really ugly at 15.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- I trust Dorit not to look,
but I think we want to
black the doors out.
- We're gonna black
all four doors out.
- Yeah, black all four doors
out so she can't see,
and we should black
those doors out as well.
♪ ♪
- Oh.
- Breathe.
- I've got this new
weird little...
It's like a twitch almost.
When I get heated
or I'm nervous...
- Yeah.
- Or...
My nose starts to run.
- That's fun.
- It's such an unpretty look.
When you're not hands-on,
something that
you ordinarily would be,
there's always a little bit of
anxiety that comes with it.
I don't want you to play with it
too much, Charles.
- I'm just getting this...
- 'Cause you know what happens
when you play with it too much,
it just gets like...
- Overdone.
- Yeah, so...
- I'm just getting
that little bend there.
- Because this now...
This doesn't look right.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Whoop. Okay.
♪ ♪
Oh.
A golf cart at a party
is not an unusual situation.
As you know, people in L.A.
do not walk anywhere,
including to the front door.
Hi. Is that for me?
- Yes, it is.
- I'll just take it anyway,
even if it's not.
[upbeat music]
- Hi.
- Hello.
♪ ♪
This feels very sedate
for a PK party.
I'm not sure
this is all there is.
Do you think I have
too much butt out?
- No, you look unbelievable.
You look radiant.
You look gracious.
- Thank you.
- And you look really beautiful,
and you have a nice time.
It's your birthday.
Jagger, what do you think, son?
Yes or no?
- Yes.
- What do they think?
Together: Yes!
- Hey, I heard you won
yesterday.
- Yes.
- Or was it today?
- Yesterday.
- And you were instrumental
in scoring the goal.
- That's my job.
- I mean, of course.
♪ ♪
- Welcome to your party, honey.
- Thank you.
It's so exciting.
It's a very chill vibe.
I do hope that there is
something else
and it's not just us
sitting around having drinks
in the living room.
[laughs] Here's hoping.
- Happy birthday.
You look lovely.
Like an old movie star, darling.
- Oh, thank you.
- That's what I said.
- Yeah.
- Like 1920s.
- Yeah, gorgeous.
- Wait, he said...
- Listen, you're an inspiration
to every woman
that's 40 years old and just
had a baby 4 months ago.
There must be some heavy Spanx
going on there or something.
- No.
- Oh, shut up.
- Oh, my God, I've never
worn Spanx in my entire life.
- Shut up.
- A bodysuit.
- Don't tell another woman that.
- [laughs]
[upbeat music]
- Oh, this is fabulous.
I've been to a lot of parties
in golf carts,
but not like this golf cart.
Like, this is a very fancy one.
These people have some money.
- Hello, hello.
- Hello.
- Hi.
- So are you excited?
- I am. I am.
- So what about the other night,
did you have fun?
- I did. I did.
- Yeah.
- It was really nice of Erika
to invite me to her party.
- Yeah.
- Everyone seemed...
- And she was totally different
to me, totally.
- Who was? Erika?
- Yeah.
She was very warm. - Yeah.
- Thank you for coming!
- Well, thank you
for inviting me.
- My God, of course!
Welcome back to my home.
- Oh, yeah, but I saw that
from all the women.
- I'm not sure Dorit is
seeing the situation
that accurately,
because I thought
Eileen Davidson
was pretty cold to me.
- Cheers. Happy birthday.
- Thank you,
thank you, thank you.
- We're gonna have fun.
- Yay!
- And we're gonna dance.
- Yay!
- And we're gonna sing.
- Yay.
- And we're gonna just, yeah,
celebrate your birthday.
- Yay.
- Ooh, look at all the red.
- So pretty, huh?
- Thank you.
- Thank you very much.
- Hello.
- Hi.
- Oh, yes, hi.
- Hello!
- Lady in red, pretty, pretty.
- Hi, gorgeous.
- How are you? You look great.
- Thank you.
Thank you, thank you.
- You look great. Look at you.
- Look at you.
- I know, everyone looks great.
You look good.
You're skinny.
- No, I'm not.
- Yes, you are.
- Oh, no, I'm not.
- Where does one even find
something like that?
- Where does one find
something like that?
- I'm not telling you...
- I know you're not.
- Any of my secrets.
[dramatic music]
- Why would I even think
you would?
- God only knows.
- Lisa Vanderpump sometimes is
just trying to be funny
and other times she's like...
It's a joke.
- Turn around.
You look good.
- No, I'm not doing anything
you ask me to do.
- You look great.
Just take the compliment.
You look good. Say thank you.
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
- You should be happy.
It's a compliment,
for God's sakes.
Hello. - Welcome.
- Happy birthday.
- Thank you.
Thank you so much.
- You look gorgeous.
What a gorgeous home.
- Thank you.
Welcome to our home.
- We live very close.
- Do you?
- Yes. I've never been up here.
- Might not be a good thing.
- Shut up.
- It might not be a good thing.
- I'm just saying.
- I'm not getting tired
of Vanderpump
taking the piss out of me
because, to me,
it's a step
in the right direction.
It means we're communicating.
I feel that it's progress.
It could be good;
it could be bad.
She's seen both ways. - Okay.
- You've seen both ways.
- But that...
Doesn't that make for
a real strong relationship...
- You've seen both ways.
- I have, I have.
- When you see both sides?
- Tell her that. Yes, it does.
- No, I prefer one side.
- Yes!
- Well, I like the side of Rinna
when she's not calling me
an evil, manipulative bitch.
For sure, that's the side
I could say I prefer.
Yes.
- You okay?
- Yeah. Why wouldn't I be okay?
- I don't know.
- Just English sense of humor.
A little prod, she deserves it.
- You're gonna have a little fun
with this, aren't you?
- A little bit.
How can I otherwise?
I gave them the power to hurt
me, and I'm taking it back.
- Lisa Vanderpump's being
a little dramatic about that.
I mean, I can't see Lisa
giving power to anyone
to do anything.
Is Eileen here?
- Oh, I don't know.
That actually doesn't
concern me that much.
♪ ♪
- Is this it?
- Okay. Yes, it is.
♪ ♪
It seems strange,
after everything that happened
between me and Lisa Vanderpump,
for it to just go away.
In the Hamptons, you said
something very offensive to me.
A friend doesn't say, "Is that
when the affair started?
Is that when it was?"
- Well, what's the big deal
of saying...
- The big way is
when you do it, own it.
Just say I'm sorry.
I'm trying to figure out
how to be okay.
I know Lisa Rinna is, too.
I'm pretty sure we're not gonna
have the same approach.
Hello. - Hi, Eileen.
- How are you, Lisa?
You look beautiful.
- So do you.
- Thank you.
How are you?
- I'm good. I'm busy. I'm happy.
I'm surviving...
- Good.
- In a world that seems
sometimes challenging.
- Yeah?
- I meant to say, um...
I'm sorry.
- Coming up...
- Can I welcome you all to
Dorit's Buddha lounge?
- Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God.
[upbeat music]
- Hello.
- Hi, Eileen.
- How are you, Lisa?
You look beautiful.
- So do you.
- Thank you.
How are you?
- I'm good. I'm busy. I'm happy.
I'm surviving...
- Good.
- In a world that seems
sometimes challenging.
- Yeah?
- I meant to say, um...
I'm sorry.
I heard that your mother died.
- [laughs]
- I only just heard
two days ago.
- Oh, thank you.
At first I thought that
Lisa Vanderpump
is finally about to
apologize to me
for disrespecting me
in the Hamptons.
It's not happening.
And I'm an idiot.
Thank you very much.
I really appreciate that.
It makes other things
seem kind of...
- Trivial?
- Trivial, inconsequential, yes.
- This is what I like to call
the great room.
- I love it.
- And everything is
a work in progress,
because we moved here
two years ago
and J.Lo and Marc Anthony
lived in this house.
- They had this house.
- They had this house,
but anyway... - I love that.
- Anyway...
- Cheers to that.
I know their marriage
didn't last,
that's not such a good thing,
but the house is nice.
- Hello, Vinny. How are you?
- Nice to see you.
- Hi, beautiful.
- Oh, my gosh,
we're both in red.
How are you? Good to see you.
- Good to see you.
Thank you. Let's do a cheers.
Hi! Pretty.
- You look gorgeous.
- You're rocking red,
look at this.
- How are you?
- Love that.
Ladies in red.
- I didn't recognize you.
I was like, who's that girl?
She doesn't have big hair.
- Is George coming?
- Cheers!
- He's not in town?
- George is on tour.
He's playing
in Cincinnati tonight.
- Oh, okay.
- He's on a tour.
- He's here in spirit.
- Oh, yeah.
Oh, but Kyle, he's...
- You'll be able to see him.
- I know.
Well, he lives here
when he's not on tour.
Do you like this, by the way?
Am I okay?
- Yeah, you look great.
- Yeah?
- Honey, I love that jacket.
- It's kinda rock and roll
with a little bit of...
- I love that jacket on you.
- Girlie nurse.
- In your house?
- Oh, yeah.
- I'm bummed out that Boy George
is not gonna be at
Dorit's birthday party.
I wanted to borrow his eyeliner.
He is a really good
makeup artist.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Hello!
- How are you?
- Good. How are you?
- Nice to see you.
- It was so fun the other night.
- Did you have fun?
- Thank you, so fun.
- How are you?
- I see Erika walk in
and she's wearing a T-shirt,
and I can't help
but think to myself,
well, what about your dress?
Aren't you gonna change?
I mean, the invitation,
I think it said, stunning.
- You don't know that
my "T-shirt" dress
just came off the Moschino
runway, but okay.
Thank you for having me.
I got you just something small.
- Oh, my goodness.
- This is for you.
- Thank you so much.
- This is what her small is.
- Thank you.
- And if you hate it,
here's the receipt. - Aah!
- You're so a girl
after my own heart.
- You look beautiful.
- Thank you.
- Happy birthday.
- Thank you, same to you.
- Thank you for coming
to my birthday.
- Oh, my goodness.
- Your party was fun.
- I'm giving Dorit this
really cute Chanel,
like, cosmetic bag.
Actually, I wanted it
for myself.
I tried to buy two,
but she... they only had one.
- He wore ripped jeans tonight,
Vinny. I said, "Don't do that."
- Vinny can do
whatever he wants.
- He goes, "I am a real person.
This is what I'm wearing."
- Guys can do that.
They throw on a blazer.
My husband's like,
"No, I'm wearing this."
- Eileen.
- I'm like, "Honey,
you can't wear ripped jeans."
He goes, "Yes, I can."
- Nobody's looking at his pants.
They're looking at his face.
- No. He's so hot. It's okay.
- No one's looking at his pants.
[upbeat music]
- Lisa, I have to
tell you something.
When you first came over
and offered condolences,
I thought you were saying,
I just wanted to apologize.
And I went... - Again?
- That's why...
That's why I got that...
- Are you out of your mind?
- That's why I had
that reaction.
- Never going to apologize...
- No, no, shut up.
- One more time. Shut up?
- I thought
that's what you said.
Clearly my reaction when she
apologized was inappropriate...
[laughs]
Considering what she was
apologizing for.
I just don't want
any misunderstandings
with Lisa Vanderpump, period.
I didn't know you were
offering condolences.
I thought you were saying...
- Of course.
- I didn't know that.
I thought you were saying
I just want to apologize,
and that's why I went...
- That's not gonna happen.
- I get that.
I'm not waiting for it.
- Okay, okay, good.
- I'm not waiting for it.
- Hell would freeze over
before I will apologize to
Eileen Davidson again.
- You guys are getting along.
- What?
- You're getting along.
- Shut up with all of that.
It's just like being polite.
- Yeah, but being polite
is the first step.
- Oh, please, what do you know
about being polite.
- It's better than
a kick in the ass.
I'm polite.
- Since when? Since when?
- I'm a lot more polite
than you.
I just think, overall,
I'm more polite than Lisa.
Lisa can get a little...
a little rude sometimes.
- I'm Dorit's mom.
- Oh, hello. Hi.
Nice to meet you, too.
- Dorit's mom?
- Yes.
- So nice to meet you. Kyle.
- Nice to meet you.
- Very nice to meet you.
- Yes.
- My husband, Shalom.
- How are you?
- Oh, hello.
- Hi.
- Nice to meet you.
- Hello, nice to meet you.
- Well, you did a very good job
raising your daughter.
- Thank you, darling.
- She's lovely.
- Thank you very much.
- Thank you.
- Dorit.
Come with me. Come with me.
Come, come. Hello!
- Oh, my gosh.
- Hello.
- Stand next to me.
Just stand next to me, will you?
- Welcome.
- I'm so nervous.
- Anyone who really knows us,
knows that I don't really
do things like this.
Too low-profile, too boring.
- Oh, shoot.
- So can we have the lights out?
- Oh, my God.
I'm so excited that
there's more to this party
but I have no idea
what to expect.
- And can I welcome you all
to Dorit's Buddha lounge?
- Whoo-hoo!
- Oh, my!
- Very cool.
- Happy birthday, darling.
- Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God.
- Coming up...
- I can't find my husband.
I'm gonna go track him down.
- I saw him;
he was in the corner
with his head up
somebody's skirt.
- Can I welcome you all
to Dorit's Buddha lounge?
- Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God.
- Oh.
[cheers and applause]
- Wow.
Wow, oh, my God.
- Oh, my God.
The lights, the music,
the colors,
I mean, how on earth
he was able to create
what he created in our backyard
is astounding.
There's nothing in this party
I could have done better.
- You approve?
- It's beautiful.
You did a beautiful job.
- Thanks, darling.
- This is great.
- Good job.
- Thank you.
- Yeah, you're welcome.
This is really handsome. - Wow.
- I think PK's doing a great
job with this birthday party.
I mean, it's red.
There's, like, smoke
and, like, an ice sculpture
and sh...
I'm down.
- Look the picture of her
over there.
How sweet. - Aw.
- Wow, look at that
sexy room back there.
40th birthday party on fleek.
- This is your private...
- Oh, my God.
- This is your private lounge.
- Oh, my God.
- Lisa, I thought you'd approve.
- I love it.
- Oh, my God.
Look at the wall of roses.
- Oh, my God.
It is so beautiful.
- Happy birthday, darling.
Oh, this is fabulous.
PK has really outdone himself.
We weren't just gonna
stand in a room
with little atmosphere.
I knew something big
was going on out there.
[upbeat dance music]
♪ ♪
- I'm staring at a big,
huge picture of myself.
- That's my new artist.
That's the guy who did
Boy George at Goldie Hawn's.
- Oh, you're kidding.
- No, he painted it.
- Oh, no.
- [laughs]
- It was going so well.
- Just to torture you
a little bit.
- Remember, this is the person
you said was evil.
I'm the evil one.
Suddenly Rinna wants me
as her dance partner.
No, life doesn't work like that.
We have to address
a couple of these things
if we're gonna move on.
- In the end, I like you more
than I don't like you.
- Well, I don't know that I'm
going to give you
that second chance.
- Well, you don't have to.
I'm just saying how I feel.
You can do whatever you want.
I'm never gonna get an apology
from Lisa Vanderpump.
Ever.
So why expect one?
But I forgive her.
Now, I can move on.
She can do whatever she wants.
I forgive her.
What would you like
to do with me,
and then what are you going to
do with me?
- I'd like a f... ing apology.
- I'm sorry for treating you
and being hard on you.
I was hard on you.
So I will apologize to you
for that.
I'm sorry for being so hard
on you.
And I'm not proud of it.
- Okay, let's move on.
- Can we?
- I can. With you.
- Really?
- Yeah.
I never thought I'd actually get
an apology from Rinna
So this just modicum of remorse
gives me some little bit of hope
for the future.
[upbeat dance music]
- Are you still drinking water?
- I'm drinking water.
- Get on it, girl.
- What?
- Have a glass of champagne.
- No, no. I've been vomiting for
the last two days.
- Why?
- No.
- 'Cause I caught a stomach
virus.
♪ ♪
- One, two, three.
Oh, spectacular.
- Vinny, do you
know how to do this?
- Come on, Vinny.
- Get it.
- He got it.
- Vinny, what happened?
Did you turn my whole phone off?
- [laughs]
- You know what,
I can't take you anywhere.
♪ ♪
- You feed her.
I can't feed her.
- You can feed me. You've
known me since I was a child.
- [laughs]
- This is the most action
he's had in weeks.
- [laughs]
- I love the fact that PK and I
have mutual friends.
And there's definitely something
that kind of bonds you
when you're here
from another country.
Can I just wipe my hands
on your T-shirt?
- Sure, sure. [laughs]
Oh, thank you.
♪ ♪
- 2004, '5, '6, '7
were my years of excess.
And I was like
dinner every night,
drinking, gambling,
doing all the things.
To be quite honest with you,
now I look back
and everything happens
for a reason
because for me, I now know
I would have died,
and kind of Dorit's
a big part of my survival,
you know, she really is.
- Whatever works for you.
- How did you guys meet?
- We met very randomly
in a bar in New York.
- Really?
- Amazing.
- I killed her with my banter.
Banter in English
means chitchat.
- We know what it means,
damn it.
- It means the same thing to us.
- We're American.
We're not that stupid.
- [laughs]
- Actually, Lucy,
it's so good to see you.
I've had a bit of a hard time
over here. - [chuckles]
- No, I've had a bit of
a hard time here.
Some of the Americans
don't get my humor.
You know how in England
you take the piss,
and you can kind of like...
Nothing's off limits.
- Yes. You can't do it here.
- Step over the line.
- I get into trouble.
I love American humor because
I live here and I love America.
However, the British humor
is very different.
It's way more aggressive.
Can actually get you in a little
bit of trouble sometimes.
[upbeat techno music]
♪ ♪
- This is so good.
- Where are your babies?
Are they sleeping upstairs?
- They are.
This is my son's room here,
and I moved him
into my daughter's room.
But I know that my...
My kids are down.
They're down
and they're upstairs.
Hello, temptress. - Yes.
- How are you, baby?
What's your take on this
fabulous club that we have here?
- I think I'd stay married to
him, love.
- I'm really glad
you guys are here.
- I know.
I just gonna find my husband.
I'm gonna go track him down.
Have you seen him anywhere?
- That's funny,
we have to get tracking devices.
- Yeah, I saw him,
he was in the corner
with his head up
somebody's skirt.
- [sighs]
I don't think so.
- Oh, it was a joke. I'm sorry.
I hope I didn't
offend her really... ish.
[dramatic music]
- Coming up...
- Baby, this isn't
gonna be easy for me
the next 30 seconds.
- Oh, God.
[upbeat dance music]
- Ladies and gentlemen,
can I encourage everybody
to come to the dance floor?
Honey, this is a chair for you.
- Oh, God.
- Okay, so if you can
crack the room,
I'd like that chair
just behind the light
and I'd like you to sit in it.
Baby, this isn't
gonna be easy for me
the next 30 seconds.
- Oh, God, honey.
- My darling Dorit.
As I stand here tonight
welcoming our friends
and family,
it's an opportunity for me
to confess publicly
what most people already know.
You're the reason...
- Oh, baby.
- You're the reason
for my strength.
It's you, baby, and you alone.
Let's go through this world
together in love.
Before I met you,
I never knew what it was
to smile for no reason.
I can conquer the world
with just one hand,
as long as you're holding
the other one.
I love you, baby.
Happy birthday.
[cheers and applause]
[chuckles]
- I loved PK's speech.
Oh, he's just got such...
Such a beautiful way of...
Showing his love to me.
He totally outdid himself.
- All right, let's party.
[cheering]
[upbeat dance music]
♪ ♪
- How were your conversations
with LVP?
- Mine?
Fine.
- You'd give it an F for fine.
Not an F for failure.
And F for fine.
- F for fine.
I think that's as good
as it's gonna get
with Lisa Vanderpump.
I'm really hoping
this is now closure
and we're moving forward.
No, F for fine.
- Are we well?
- Well.
I was looking for Vinny...
She said, "Well, I saw him
in the corner,
and he had his head up
somebody's skirt."
- Oh.
- What?
- Yeah. No, not kidding.
Okay... - Eileen.
- I gotta go.
- Wait, hold on. Hold on.
- Wait, she said that?
- Come on, come on.
- I'm not kidding.
- She said that?
- Yeah.
Because she's f... ing funny!
I could take a joke.
I think I've got
a really good sense of humor.
I also think I have
a pretty good idea
who Lisa Vanderpump is and I
don't think this "British humor"
is quite exactly
what she's saying it is.
I think it's a little loaded.
- What did you say to her back?
- I said ha-ha,
and then I walked away.
- I had such high hopes.
- I guess I'm not having
a cake this year.
- Next on "The Real Housewives
of Beverly Hills"...
[dog sneezes] - Oh!
- Wait.
- No, no, no, Lisa.
- Oh, Lisa.
- Don't do that, no.
- If I stuck a pole up his ass,
I could probably do the floor,
as well.
- Okay,
so there's this dating app.
- Dating app?
- And you can't get on it
unless you're like,
really special.
- Are you kidding?
That's such a crock of sh...
- You all right?
- No.
- Oh.
- It's the last time
we're going to be there,
and it's saying good-bye
to everything that was her.
Let me just take a second.
- Erika,
Kyle needs some underwear.
- I don't have any.
- Oh, oh!
Oh. [laughter]
- I think that Americans
need to kind of like...
- What are you talking about?
- That's what I'm saying.
- You're born in Connecticut.
- Erika, settle down.
Take a deep breath,
for crying out loud.
- To learn more about
the Housewives,