The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (2010–…): Season 6, Episode 13 - Spinning a Web - full transcript
The women raise money for charity while working up a sweat in spin class; Yolanda accuses Kyle of gossiping, then confronts Lisa Vanderpump for questioning her children's health; Kathryn visits Erika at her house in an effort to gain her trust.
- Previously, on "The Real
Housewives of Beverly Hills"...
- With your husband, do you go
to dinners with him,
like, with clients and things?
- Yes.
- But I bet people are surprised
when you show up, right?
- Not anymore.
- You have great intellect,
but you have great insight.
- You have a powerful presence.
Lisa knows she's charming,
and she knows
when she can get you.
- Kept going on and asking
more and more things about it,
and "Is that
when the affair started?
Is that what happened?"
- Darling, I wouldn't want
to ask you anything
that you wouldn't want
to tell me.
- I kind of now feel
like I offended her,
which is weird.
- What's going on with Anwar and
Bella's Lyme disease?
- She says it's true, then
she knows more than I do.
- What does Mohamed say?
- No.
- Yolanda said that
she could have put it out there
that you were bipolar,
but she chose not to do that.
- You labeled Kim last year,
you labeled Brandi,
and now you're labeling me.
- And I'm sorry about that.
It's like putting a Band-Aid on,
but there's still blood gushing
all over the place.
I feel like I can't
let go of you now.
[upbeat music]
- My lips were made for talking,
and that's just what they'll do.
- In Beverly Hills,
you can be anything,
but it's most important
to be yourself.
- I'm an enigma
wrapped in a riddle and cash.
- I may be an actress,
but that doesn't mean
I'll stick to your script.
- Fake friends
believe in rumors.
Real friends believe in you.
- Don't hate the game.
Just marry a player.
- I'm passionate about dogs,
just not crazy about bitches.
[upbeat music]
- You have your ass pads in?
- Feel 'em.
- Oh, my God.
- [laughs]
♪ ♪
- Hey, there.
- We're ready.
- Has our group arrived yet?
I'm at an advantage 'cause
I do this all the time,
but he hasn't been spinning
for a long time.
- Are we gonna have to build
houses after this?
- Uch, I don't know.
Richard!
- Muah, thank you for coming.
- You know I have, like,
the endurance of a gnat.
- Hello, ladies.
- How are you?
Donnie.
Thank you so much, brother.
- Yeah, absolutely.
- So Kyle,
what are we doing today?
- They're affiliated with
Habitat for Humanity.
They choose a family
to build a home for
and we come here, we raise
money, and we go out there
and we actually help build
the homes for the family.
- When do we do that?
- Are we gonna do that?
- In two weeks
or something like that.
- Mauricio and his company,
The Agency,
partnered with SoulCycle
to raise money
for Giveback Homes.
- There's so many
people in here.
- This isn't a private party.
This is for charity.
Get your ass on the bike.
Each person in this class has
donated $250 minimum.
- Let's have some fun, huh?
Let's raise some money,
and let's have some fun.
- Yes!
- Thank you.
- I would love it if you'd stay
for 45 minutes.
- 45 minutes?
Are you out of your mind?
- Let... hold on.
I gotta be with Mo.
- Did he say
"Four to five minutes"
or "45 minutes"?
- Four to... [laughs] 45!
- I'd rather do
four to five minutes,
and then I'll write a check.
45 minutes is not gonna happen.
Haven't done 45 minutes
straddling anything.
Well, not since 1984.
- Hey, everybody!
[cheers and applause] Whoo!
- I know we've raised somewhere
around $10,000 here today.
On behalf of Kyle and myself,
we're gonna make a donation
of $5,000 today.
- Raising money
via SoulCycle classes
is the new wave of the future
in Beverly Hills.
Forget bake sales,
standing in the street.
Are you kidding me?
- How much do I have to donate
if I wanna go straight home?
- At least a house.
- Follow me, keeping in mind
that every bike
is a little different,
every body is
a little different,
so just honor whatever
you carried in here today.
Any trouble, any drama,
any fears
that you may have carried
into the room.
What if you just felt
all of that stuff melt away?
- Hear what he's saying?
They say inspiring things.
- Yeah?
- Are we starting to get sweat
a little bit yet?
- Oh, no way!
[dance music]
Ha! Ow!
Four... three...
two, let it go,
find the beat, right foot...
- Ooh, that instructor, honey.
He was living!
Richard Simmons, Zoolander,
crossed with, like,
West Hollywood fabulousness.
- I'd like to go home now.
- Lisa, are you starting
to believe yet?
Am I making you a believer?
- Oh, bless Vanderpump's heart.
Oh, she's just not used to it.
She's just not built
for this kind of activity.
- Mauricio, this is
an awesome event.
Thank you for having us.
- Ross, thank you so much.
- Great job, guys.
- [laughs]
She came in pink
patent leather pumps
for the class.
Seriously.
- Vanderpump!
Are you taking a shower?
- Yeah.
- Whoo!
- The SoulCycle event
was a huge success.
We raised a lot of money
and everyone had fun.
Except Lisa Vanderpump.
I don't think she had fun.
- She wants to come back
tomorrow with me.
I was like, "Why?"
- Lot of energy.
- Actually, my first
and last time.
- Okay, honey, I love you.
- All right, I love you.
I gotta go do a showing.
- I'm going to lunch
with the girls.
Thank you. - Thank you, guys.
- I'll ride on there.
[upbeat music]
I loved it. - Lisa loved it too.
Lisa was dying,
talking the whole time,
chewing my ear off.
Lisa's workout is
lifting her diamond watch.
Like this. - Yeah.
- She lifts rocks.
♪ ♪
- Thank you. Hi, how are you?
- Thank you.
- Oh, thank God.
It's cooled down.
- Yummy. Thank you.
- Who else is coming?
- Yolanda and Eileen are coming.
I thought Yolanda
didn't feel well enough.
- She texted me yesterday.
And said, if she was
feeling well enough,
she was even going to
come and spin.
- No.
- Yeah.
- The last time I saw Yolanda
and Lisa Rinna
was at Erika's house,
and it didn't really seem like
they resolved anything
with the "bipolar" comment.
- What you never said to her
was the bipolar comment.
- That's mean.
- She didn't really say
you were bipolar.
She said,
"I didn't call Lisa bipolar,
and I could have."
- Because of how I acted with
your sister last year.
- So I'm kind of curious to know
where they're at right now.
- Hi, you guys!
- Hi there! You look nice.
- How are you?
- Muah, muah.
- Did you just come from work?
- I came from work.
What do you want
on your guacamole?
- Tomatoes, cilantro, jalapenos?
- All of them. All of it.
If someone says
they don't want all of it,
they don't want good guacamole.
- Or they have to kiss somebody
at their job tomorrow.
- You have to kiss
someone at your job?
- No, I don't. I don't.
I'm just saying.
No, actually, I have to say,
things are kind of dry
for Ashley right now.
She's not... she's got no action.
- Who do you kiss?
Who's your guy? - Nobody.
She's in love with her
daughter's fiancé.
- [gasps]
- Ooh!
- Tramp!
- Scandalous!
- Have you guys, like,
gotten it together?
- No, we took a shower
together last year.
- What?
- What?
- Oh!
- I know.
He dragged me into the shower
and ripped my shirt off.
What are you doing?
- You said you wanted to help
sober me up, didn't you?
- This isn't exactly
what I had in mind.
- Me neither, but it's working.
- Let me ask you:
did you like it?
When he actually did it,
did you like it?
- I've got to tell you,
quite honestly,
it's very technical.
I'm sorry to disappoint you,
but it really is.
And you just want to make sure
it looks good,
and that it's sexy, and that
the shower's not
hitting the wrong place.
- They ripped it all off?
- Lookit, you're so funny!
Maybe Lisa Vanderpump
wants to be in a shower
getting her shirt ripped off.
- Hi! all: Hi!
- Happy birthday!
- Oh, thank you!
- Oh, for God's sakes.
Seriously?
- Thank you.
- Happy birthday, honey.
- Thanks, darling.
- Okay, I have a question.
Was this a birthday lunch that
nobody told me about?
- No, it wasn't.
- We don't have a present.
- No.
- Right.
- Well, it's another year,
I'm older and wiser,
but I don't want
to make a big deal
about my birthday this year.
But you know what?
I love the fact that
Yolanda bought me pink flowers.
It's a gesture,
and it's noted.
- So how was the... the biking?
- Oh, my God.
You're so lucky
you missed that class.
Yolanda, you have no idea.
- You know, I haven't been
in the gym for three years.
Obviously, if I was healthy,
I'd be spinning
my little ass off there,
but, you know, that's just
not where I'm at.
- Whenever people say,
"Oh, my God,
you're in such good shape,
what are you on?"
Like, "What are you doing?"
I always say, "It's HWB."
- What is that?
- It's "hard work, bitch."
- Let me see. Let me feel.
- Go ahead.
- Oh!
- Jesus!
No, make a muscle. [laughs]
- Kathryn and I,
we're just gonna box.
We're gonna do some mitts.
- Oh, I love boxing.
- I know.
- I would love to kick your ass.
- Honey, you can't kick my ass.
- She's like so serious.
Oh, my God.
- Wait, what do
you want of this?
- Look at this, Eileen. Look.
- She scares me.
- What do you want?
- You're right.
I'm getting myself into
trouble here with this girl.
She's taking me literally.
- No, we're not boxing
each other.
- Oh, we're not?
- You're not going in a ring.
- Easy, I need you guys
on Saturday.
- What are we doing Saturday?
- We're just gonna have
a little dinner at Wally's.
- At Wally's?
- Yeah.
- Oh, I thought we were
going to your house.
- No, it's too far.
You know, I haven't entertained
for the last 11 months,
so I would love to throw
a little dinner party
at Wally's so I don't have
the pressure of
having to hire people to
cook and clean and all that.
And where is, uh... where is Lisa?
- She's working.
- Oh, good.
Did I hear that, uh,
Harry might be
winning an Emmy?
- "Mad Men" is nominated,
and he was on that.
- He was amazing in that, yeah.
- Are you guys okay now?
- Yeah.
- You and Lisa Rinna?
- Yeah, why?
Yeah.
- You never know.
- We were okay the week before.
Let's not start
about this again.
- Yes.
- It's just strange to me how
everybody can
say something rude,
and have an argument,
and then hug it out,
or send flowers, and then
pretend like everything's fine
when it's very obvious
that it's not.
I don't think
that Yolanda knows that
Lisa Rinna knows about
Yolanda saying
that Lisa Rinna was bipolar.
- Yes, she does.
- How?
- She did.
She said it at the table.
- I'm not getting
involved with that.
- What'd you say?
- They can deal with it
themselves.
- What are you guys talking
about over there and whispering?
- Yeah, what are you
talking about?
- No, we were talking about
the conversation with Lisa Rinna
after Yolanda left.
- About bipolar?
- Yeah.
[tense music]
- Coming up...
- I hold a lot in the vault.
- Are you threatening me?
♪ ♪
- Have you strapped one on yet
and tried that?
- Yes.
No, I think a dildo's
just a good thing.
- Yeah, what are you
talking about?
What are you saying?
- No, we were talking about
the conversation
with Lisa Rinna
after Yolanda left.
- About bipolar?
- Yeah.
- Lisa Rinna says you said
she was bipolar.
- I never said
Lisa Rinna was bipolar.
From judging her
by her behavior,
if you throw a glass of wine
at somebody,
send somebody
a text message saying,
"I'm gonna come
and fááá you up,"
and then put the seed
that somebody
has a Munchausen-whatever
disease,
I could potentially
call her bipolar,
but I would never do that
because
it's not my place to do so.
Right? - Yeah.
- Lisa also didn't say
"You have Munchausen's."
She said someone else did,
so you're saying,
"I could say you have bipolar."
It's the same kind of thing.
It's putting it
out there anyway.
- Her and I worked it out,
and now you're
bringing it up again.
I... I told her that...
- I wasn't bringing it up
to you, Yolanda.
We were... we were just having
a conversation privately.
- Yolanda hasn't been
around a lot,
and she's taking this
kind of hard line.
Kyle's getting frustrated
because Yolanda's being
so dismissive.
Kind of condescending right now.
- Obviously Lisa said something
after Yolanda left
that they never got
any closure on.
- Listen, I mean,
it's not the first time
that somebody at a table
is gonna say,
"What's going on with,"
you know,
"so and so?"
Is... I mean, hello?
- The two of you are just, like,
whispering about that subject
is ridiculous.
[tense music]
Kyle and Lisa whispering
strikes a nerve in me.
That's the first thing
I taught my children.
You don't whisper, you know,
like this, in a group of women.
- Lisa Rinna came to us,
at her house, and said
the Munchausen thing.
So we're already involved!
We're there. We got sucked in.
- But it's done. It's done.
Lisa and I, we've worked it out.
We worked through it.
- I'm uncomfortable.
I like Kyle, and I like Yolanda.
And I don't like it
when things like this happen.
- You guys are done?
I don't care.
It's none of my business. I'm...
- Oh, you're making it
your business.
- You put a group of women
together,
immediately they start
tearing each other down,
angling, who's better friends
with this one,
who likes that one,
"You said"...
I don't give a sháá.
- So, I don't care. Whatever.
- It's fine. It's fine.
Just relax.
Have a glass of wine.
- Yolanda, I mean, come on.
Give me a fáááing break.
♪ ♪
Give me a break.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Lisa, I'm gonna walk you in.
- Great.
- You're gonna be sitting
to Jenny's left.
- Is she here? Is she here?
[screaming]
- You look gorgeous.
- I just got my face injected,
so it's sore.
Be careful.
I saw Terry Dubrow yesterday.
- Did he do it?
- He did... Sculptra?
- Why have I not done it?
I've done everything...
- Well, because
your face is perfect!
- No, Jenny.
- Look how cute you are.
Jenny and I have known
each other for so many years,
it's so fun to go on
and hang with your girlfriends.
I mean, how hard is that?
- I am so excited
that you're co-hosting.
- I can't believe
we're doing this finally.
- We're both talk-aholics.
Good luck to us both.
- Good luck to us both.
Good luck to the world.
- [laughs]
- Jenny's fearless,
and I love working
with people who are fearless.
She's honest,
and she's a girl's girl,
and she doesn't need
to put you down
in order to feel good
about herself.
- Welcome to "Dirty Sexy Funny."
I'm Jenny McCarthy.
[drumming on knees]
Lisa Rinna joining me today.
- Jenny! Hi!
- I love you.
- I love you.
You know, we go way back.
- Let's give people the history
a little bit.
- Okay.
- So, I moved to Sherman Oaks,
and Lisa opened up a shop,
and I feel like I was, like,
one of your first customers.
- You were, I think.
- And you were like,
"Oh, my God, hi.
I'll give you
a celebrity discount."
- [laughing]
- I was like, "Thank you, Lisa."
- So gracious of me.
- So gracious of you.
- I have to stay relevant.
It's part of my job.
I shamelessly stay relevant.
Of course. Honey.
We got bills to pay.
- A Tennessee woman
was arrested Sunday
for allegedly threatening
to post, on social media,
nude pics of a woman she found
on her boyfriend's phone.
Have you ever gotten nervous
with Harry at all?
Mm.
- Here's the thing with Harry.
It's really the guys
that I'm more nervous about.
It's the guys
that want to fááá Harry.
- Does he appreciate
the male physique at all?
[playful music]
- No, I will tell you that...
- Okay, so he loves pussy.
- Harry likes pussy. Period.
- Have you strapped one on yet
and tried that?
- Yes.
- It doesn't make you gay.
- No!
When I was very young,
my mom said to me,
"That mouth of yours
is gonna get you
into trouble someday."
I don't know why
I even strapped it...
I think I just wanted to try it.
This mouth has gotten me
into so much trouble,
and I've also made a giant,
enormous amount of money
from this mouth
getting me in trouble.
♪ ♪
No, I think a dildo's
just a good thing.
- I do too.
- A big one.
[laughter]
You're so good.
You're such a natural.
[hip-hop music]
- I'm telling you not to talk
about me or Lisa Rinna
when Rinna's not here
to defend herself.
- I was talking
to a close friend of mine
in a corner, alone.
- A close friend of yours?
- You guys were having
a conversation.
- Please.
- Well, we are
close friends right now.
- Good.
They're close friends
when it works in their favor.
- Oh...
- Wait, I owe you one!
- [screams]
- And, at times, they're not.
- At least admit
one thing you've done wrong.
- Kyle, I was...
- Can you not say one thing?
- So, little bit
suspicious to me.
I get what you're saying, Kyle,
I'm just asking you to drop it.
I hold a lot
in the vault, honey.
- What does that mean?
Are you threatening me?
- It means that... no, not at all.
Not at all.
No, I have more integrity
than that.
Why are you so angry today?
- Because you are being
rude to me, Yolanda.
- I am not being rude.
I don't intend to be rude at.
- I think everyone at the table
may beg to differ.
I would think. I don't know.
- You know it's funny,
it's so much of, like,
it's not what you say,
it's how you say it.
- Even if you say it
in a nice, calm voice
with a smile on your face,
you know what I'm talking about.
- I'm not... I honestly
am not trying
to be rude with you at all.
- Yes, Yolanda had tone.
100%, Yolanda
had tone with Kyle.
But she doesn't want to hear it,
she wants to have
a nice luncheon,
and boom, you know, right away,
here we go again.
- I mean, Lisa's obviously got
residual feelings about
even the "bipolar" label
being out there.
- Yeah, I still have mixed
feelings about the Munchausen...
- And I understand that.
- And your shááá
about my children,
but I don't bring it up.
- What do you mean, and my sháá
about your children...
I've never talked sháá
about your children,
and I defended your children
when that... the town drunk
turned around and she said,
"Oh, Bella, it's reported
that she's an alcoholic."
- You're saying,
am I an alcoholic?
You heard that
about your daughter.
- I didn't need you
to stand up...
My daughter is not an alcoholic.
- I think what
she's saying is that
she never said anything
about your kids.
- No, I would never
say anything negative.
- That's all, she's just trying
to keep that straight.
- Never.
[tense music]
All right. I'm going to go.
I will see you.
I will see you again.
And I'm gonna go do
what I've got to do.
- Okay, bye.
- I'll talk to you later.
- Bye.
- [smooches]
♪ ♪
- I'm done.
I answered a question,
and said that I thought
they were healthy.
If that's talking sháá
about her kids, then...
but no, I never have,
and I never will.
- Yeah.
- I would have
really appreciated
Lisa staying here and
supporting me in this moment,
considering Yolanda was angry
with both of us.
It's stupid.
♪ ♪
Excuse me.
Could we get the check, please?
♪ ♪
[sighs]
- Coming up...
- I think she engages
from the side.
I think she doesn't want
to leave any fingerprints.
- Don't get caught in her web.
♪ ♪
- All the way from Brentwood!
- Hey, babe!
- I appreciate you coming over.
Let's eat first,
and then we'll work out.
♪ ♪
- Is that a cinnamon roll?
- It is.
- Oh, I love you.
- Pretty day today.
- This is beautiful.
Honestly, that looks
so custard-y and delicious.
I know you made this too.
- I slaved all day.
Look, I don't cook.
You know, I went right to
the cute place around the corner
and got the food.
I did not... I don't make sháá.
- Tell me about you.
- What do you want to know?
Why do you want to know, first.
- I want to know because
I want to be your friend.
- Okay.
- And I feel like
I can't be good friends
if I don't know who you are
and what you're about.
I want Erika to open up
to me a little bit.
I want to know why she is
the way she is,
that she's so closed off,
and she kind of, like,
has, like,
this whole persona that
she doesn't want
to let anyone in.
- I'm cold.
- Are you cold?
- Very.
- Really?
- Very fáááing cold.
- She's a ice princess.
Do you have women friends?
- I have never been
well-liked by women.
I think I could point back
to being a child.
I was very open and sensitive
and artistic,
and I think that
I got my feelings hurt
by a group of girls
when I was in middle school,
and that's... - Mean girls?
- Yeah, pretty much.
I want to have a group
of women friends.
I've never had a group
of women friends,
and the reason is because
I just don't trust it.
It's not that I'm not open
to having women friends,
because I have them.
They're just few
and far between.
I want really good women
in my life,
not just any old broad
that comes in.
I'm a lot to handle,
and I look at certain way.
- You feel like you get judged.
- Very quickly.
Well, Yolanda's my friend.
She's loving.
She's compassionate.
She's kind of like my go-to guy.
Except she's a girl. [laughs]
I'll tell you, the closest
was my grandmother that I lost.
She had a long battle
with Alzheimer's,
and I'm glad that
that's over for her.
- Oh, honey.
- Oh, no, it's fine.
I mean, that...
I put this in perspective
long ago.
You know, she was great.
She was really good.
- And you trusted her.
- But... oh, my God, yeah.
- That's...
- She and I were close.
But, you know. Things happen.
People get old. They die.
It's the natural way of life.
- I see the pain,
I see the love,
and I think,
when she lost her grandmother,
that she lost
a big part of that...
That safe place.
It makes me understand her more
because what I went through
with my father dying.
When you want
to get on the phone
and just, like, call someone and
talk, and like, just yak...
- She's gone. She's dead.
- Your grandma.
- [chuckles]
I'm still the same brat...
[laughs]
That, uh,
I was when she was alive.
I-I don't think
I've changed much
since she, uh, passed away.
[somber music]
♪ ♪
I definitely miss her.
Very much.
- You can call me.
I will be your first
genuine woman friend.
- Like, you're not gonna
side with someone
and go run off with them...
- If someone did something
where the other person really
couldn't defend themself...
- You would step in.
- Yeah, I... yeah.
- There are
cool girls everywhere,
and there are
bitches everywhere.
You know, you just have to
weed through and find out.
I got news for you.
I think all of these bitches
can defend themselves.
- I agree.
Some more than others.
- Yeah.
It is a case by case basis.
What do you think
of Lisa Vanderpump?
- She's a nice... she's so... she...
- [forced laughter]
- She's not sweet?
- No.
- So you're saying
she's underhanded.
[lively music]
♪ ♪
- Hi, how are you?
- Hello, Lisa, nice to see you.
- Where are the flowers here?
- They moved them right here.
- Okay, put them back.
Well, okay,
I'm going to sit over here.
- Right.
- Been so crazy busy.
I haven't been here that much.
Can I have a glass
of rosé, please?
- And a beer for me, please,
young man.
- So what's going on?
I just... I was in PUMP,
and I walked past Chi Chi LaRue,
and they've moved out.
The sex shop's moved out.
It's gone.
- It's nice in here.
- Oh, my God.
Some of this
looks a bit bizarre even to me.
- Yeah, but we're not
looking at the stock,
we're looking at the premises.
I'm paying rent on it.
- We are paying rent on it.
- I'm using my savings.
- You and me.
Your savings and my savings.
- No, I'm... I've put it up
for a temporary let.
I've got five people
looking at it.
- What's the city said?
- It's in planning.
At this moment,
there's no fourth restaurant,
and the pressure's off.
I feel happy
if Lisa feels happy, so...
- So, I went to, um...
I went to the SoulCycle.
Literally, I was,
"Okay, I'm over this."
I'm gonna kill Kyle.
[upbeat music]
- Annoying.
♪ ♪
[doorbell rings]
- Coming. One second.
Look at you! - Hi!
Oh, my gosh. Come in.
- So, I want a little
catch-up time.
- Oh! [laughing]
Oh, well there's lots
to fill you in on.
- Yes, I have a feeling.
- Come in.
- You look pretty! Hi.
- Well, you have a feeling
'cause you saw the email.
- Yes, I did.
- Brutal.
- So, I... my head is spinning.
- Yolanda wrote me an email,
and CC'd all the women
in the group.
I thought she always
makes a point to say,
"If you have a problem,
we keep it between us.
You come to me to talk it out,"
so why does she send
a scolding email
to me and CC everyone else?
- What happened?
What's going on?
- Well, okay.
We all went, after the SoulCycle
thing, to Frida...
- Yeah.
- [sighs] This is...
It's just, the whole thing with
Yolanda's so... you know...
- And she was there.
- She came.
Which was great. - Yeah.
- We've had zero issues.
- Right.
- Now she sends an email
addressed to me,
basically scolding me...
[rousing music]
♪ ♪
- At lunch,
I was just so frustrated.
When things are said
in a stressful situation,
my brain shuts down,
so then I can't say
what I want to say,
so I got up
in the middle of the night
and wrote an email to Kyle...
- "Kyle, I've been thinking
about yesterday,
and you know, I don't
appreciate"... and telling me,
"You should research
Lyme disease.
It's not a pretty look
for you not to be"...
First of all, I am sympathetic.
I've always said that.
- I explained to her,
from a very clear point of view,
what I had to say
about her behavior,
and I wanted all the other girls
to hear it as well.
- I did see the email in the...
You know, like,
11th hour, and I was like...
- And CC-ing all of you?
"I'm coming out of
a three-year ordeal
"of living in
a mentally paralyzed cocoon
"due to an infection in my brain
call neuroborreliosis."
- "I arrived with a great
attitude yesterday,
"and proud of myself
for making it out of bed
and joining you girls."
"For you to come down
on me so hard
"is beyond my understanding,
and it left me quite confused."
- "I just trying to catch up
and participate.
"I don't need your pity,
but I do ask you kindly
to respect my situation."
- "Your lack of compassion
is not a pretty look."
- She was like, you know,
"I'm over this," you know,
"the
Munchen... munchen... whatever."
- Right.
- And, um, "I'm over the bipolar
and you talking sháá
about my kids,"
she said to Lisa.
- None of it makes sense.
It is passive aggression
at its finest.
And projection.
There's something going on.
- Then Lisa just leaves.
- She did?
- It just, you know,
it got... not good.
- Me. Me!
Talking sháá about kids.
I was just pissed off.
I was pissed off.
- Uh, but, really,
that's annoying when somebody
attacks you over something
that you never said...
- I know, I know.
- And never would do.
- I don't understand it.
Anyway, look,
just telling you what happened
at drinks.
So I left,
and then I got this email
that wasn't addressed to me.
It was addressed to Kyle.
So there's obviously
pretty intense feelings.
- And then she said... on top of
all that, she says,
um, "You know, I have things
in my vault
that I could bring up
and I don't talk about."
- What does that mean?
- I mean, is that a threat?
I don't even know
what that means.
- Well, it sounds like a threat.
I mean... - Yeah.
- "Things in my vault"?
A good friend
doesn't store secrets
to use them at a later date.
It's very similar to Kim saying,
"I know something
about your husband."
- Let's talk about the husband.
- Oh, wait. Excuse me?
Did you just say,
"Let's talk about the husband?"
- Let's not talk about
what you don't want out.
- Never go after...
- Everybody will know!
Everybody will know...
- My fáááing husband!
That's a vicious, mean,
narcissist that does that.
It's an empty threat,
and only pussies do that.
If you want to think that...
You know,
two moments of me, like,
losing my sháá
are making me look
like I'm bipolar,
okay, but I understand
why she'd want to...
You know, do that.
- Yeah, yeah.
- I do. I get that.
You want to hurt back. - Yeah.
- At the end of the day, I have
a lot of sympathy for her.
I really do.
Now, will we ever
be best friends?
Maybe not.
It's all very strange.
Anyway, I gotta go,
because I have got
Kyle, Kathryn, and Eileen
coming 'round to the house.
Erika and Rinna can't make it.
I'm gonna have
an early dinner with them, and
I know you've got a meeting...
- What am I doing?
- You've got a meeting at 6:00.
I know your schedule.
I know what you're doing
before you even do it.
- That's true.
- Okay, so I have to go
to four Emmy parties
with my husband.
- And a red carpet, probably.
- Yeah, no, I'm putting on
my Mrs. Harry Hamlin hat
and, you know,
I'm actually quite glad
that I'm not going to join
any of you.
- Yes.
[upbeat music]
- Vanderpump? She's not sweet?
- No, she is sweet.
But she's smart.
I think she engages
from the side.
I think she's a sniper
from the side.
I think she doesn't want
to leave any fingerprints.
That's what I think.
I can sense Lisa Vanderpump...
crafting the situation
to her advantage.
Well, it started
in the Hamptons with Eileen.
- You did say to me,
"So, is that
when the affair started?"
- Yeah, I just wish,
at the time, you'd have said,
"Oh, you know what, you're
asking me too many questions."
- I was just trying to tell you
what I was feeling.
- Okay. Don't worry about it.
- And then I watched the stuff
with Yolanda and her children.
- He didn't think
that they had it.
- He doesn't think they have it?
- No, I don't want to
get involved.
- And it just seems
as if there's this
current, or this tone,
moving everything
to her advantage.
She's not gonna be blunt
'cause she doesn't think
it'll serve her later.
- Because it comes back
and bites her in the ass?
- Perhaps.
- Doesn't make her look good?
- Right.
- To be honest?
- She's selectively honest.
I think some people are
more manipulative than others.
- Oh, absolutely.
- You know?
- I think some people can
spot that more than others.
- You know, it is what it is.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Coming up...
- Ken, will you call the ponies?
- "Call the ponies!"
- "Bring the giraffe!"
- "And where is that zebra?"
- "Where's the llama?"
It's like Noah's ark. [laughs]
♪ ♪
- Rocio, any chance
of a cup of tea?
- I know you're...
- On my lazy ass.
Gracias.
This could go horribly wrong.
- It's nice. Your pink flamingo.
- Thank you.
It was my birthday yesterday,
and I wanted to float around
on a pink flamingo,
and I loved every
pink inch of it.
Rocio, is the chicken
almost done?
- Yeah.
- Do you want to just
take it out?
The chicken? - Yeah, okay.
[techno music]
♪ ♪
- What do you want to serve
your friends, drinks-wise?
- The cheapest crap
we want to get rid of.
[laughter]
- You have to be kidding me.
This is too funny,
and you have got a cup of tea.
Where's the ponies?
- Oh, they're out playing.
They'll be in later.
- This is like a petting zoo.
You know, it's like Noah's ark.
We've got the puppies,
we've got the ponies,
we've got the swans.
This is not normal
Beverly Hills.
- Let's go downstairs.
We'll have a drink
in the wine bar.
- Okay.
- And then we're gonna eat.
- Hi, Hanky and Panky.
♪ ♪
- I thought we'd just have
a glass of wine and sit here.
- This is lovely.
I've never been down here.
Wow. - Thank you.
- That's beautiful.
This is gorgeous.
- Oh, thanks, darling.
So this is our little wine bar.
Well, do you remember,
Bethany had a wine bar,
and I was just like,
"I don't want to compete!"
- Oh, this is your own bar.
- What do you think, Ken?
You approve?
- I love it. Yes.
- Hello, ladies.
- Hi!
- Hi, sweetie pie.
- Muah!
- Hi, girls. both: Hi!
- How are you?
- Good.
How are you? - Good.
- Good to see you.
- Good to see you.
- Hi, how are you?
- Muah!
- [gasps]
- Oh, no!
- Schnooky!
- Oh, my gosh!
Can I hold him? - I'm not sure.
- So cute.
- Give me a kiss.
All: Oh! - Oh, my gosh.
- Sexy boy!
- I want to get a dog.
- Isn't he a sexy boy?
- I'll let you hold him.
- Thank you. Hi, mommy.
- No way!
I have a new dog, Schnooky,
and I am absolutely in love
with his little furry body.
Come on, then.
Let's go and sit out there.
- Ooh!
[upbeat music]
- Oh, this is pretty in here.
- This is very lovely.
- This is so pretty!
- I kind of did it, like,
really country down here.
You know?
It has a different feel.
- It is really country.
- The boondocks.
Country bumpkins.
- Can you even stand it?
- Look, there's the retrievers.
They've just come back
from a long walk.
- Oh, babies!
- Come on, you guys. Come on.
[Schnooky whines]
- He does look like you, Ken.
Hold him up next to your face.
It's like twins. - Oh, yeah.
- He looks like all our animals.
That's the problem.
- Come on!
- So cute.
- Ken, will you call the ponies?
- "Call the ponies!"
- "Ken, bring the giraffe!"
- "And where is that zebra?"
- "Where's the llama?"
- What about when I took
the llama through your house?
- Oh!
- Do you remember?
Have you got a diaper?
- She's not going in my house!
- Okay, the party's started!
- I was joking.
- Let me just go and get
some crispy rice.
- Oh, let's get
some crispy rice!
[laughs] - What is it?
- Look at those boobies!
- You mean...
- What's wrong with my tits
and my accent?
- Nothing. They're lovely.
Both of them are lovely.
[laughter]
- That email was really awkward.
[tense music]
- She's struggling.
- I agree.
- And I think that email
was her way
of trying to organize
her thoughts.
- But, come on.
To basically reprimand me
and include everyone in an email
is a little inappropriate.
It was weird.
- It just pulls everyone in.
Everyone gets pulled in,
and before long,
it's like you're in it
whether you wanted to be or not.
Oh... oh, my gosh. Stop it.
Now the ponies are coming in.
- Hi, ponies.
- You can't beat this.
Like... - I know, ponies, right?
- I gotta take a picture
for Donnie.
He... I told him that
there's little ponies,
and he didn't believe me,
he's like,
"Come on. Not really."
- Really, I know.
That was Ken's birthday present.
- He doesn't believe it.
- Would you like a crispy rice?
They're from my restaurant.
- Yeah, I love those.
- Um, anyway, we were just
talking about the email.
- [sighs]
- For somebody who's very, like,
foggy-headed,
it seemed like
a very clear email.
Lisa's not about her being sick.
No one doubts she's sick.
We all know...
- Said that a million times.
We know she's got Lyme disease.
- She's definitely suffering
with Lyme disease
and whatever else it is
that she has, and...
- I-I think she feels
attacked a lot.
- Uh, excuse me, how did I feel
when she threw
that crap out there
about her children?
I had to defend myself.
- You never spoke
against her children.
- Never!
- Ever. Ever.
So clearly, her saying that...
- I never... I wouldn't want to.
- She must not be
the biggest fan,
if she's saying that,
because that's not even true.
You never said that.
And, you know...
- Kyle, are you defending me?
- Well, it's the truth.
- Thank you.
- You never said one thing
about her children.
- And you know what?
They're lovely kids.
- Hi. Fine. How are you?
- Hi, Rocio.
- We've just got
some roast chicken.
I made it. It was so simple.
- Fantastic.
- And just some green salad.
Thanks, Rocio. - You're welcome.
- Did you put my dressing on it?
- Yeah, I did.
- Thanks.
- Is that okay
for all of you guys?
Do you want
a tomato and burrata?
- Nice.
- Yes, thank you.
- You know,
I had lunch with Erika...
- And you worked out together.
- Yeah, we boxed.
- All right. Jab, cross, up. Go.
- Jab, cross...
- Beautiful.
- Jab, cross, up.
Ah, aah.
And then a cross at the end.
- Who are... who are you
hitting right now?
- You know, I really don't
have beef with anyone.
I'm good. - How was that?
- It was nice.
She had two trainers come,
and quite handsome.
- Handsome trainers?
- [laughs]
- Did she open up a bit more?
- She did.
She actually shed... six tears?
And then we started talking
about Vanderpump.
- What?
- Coming up...
- We're good.
- How good?
'Cause I need to be
really fáááing good.
She spoke of her grandmother,
which is her soft spot.
I mean, like,
she had tears come down
and didn't really
have expression,
but she sucked it right back up.
And then we started talking
about everything else, and...
- What was her take on
what happened the other day?
- She said basically, like,
in so many words,
that, you know, just to be,
like, aware of you.
- Who?
- Vanderpump.
- What?
- And then she said,
"Don't let her steer you, and
don't get caught in her web."
- Oh.
- And I... yeah.
- That's weird.
- Those aren't the words
she used, but like,
something like... like, basically,
I got the feeling like
I was getting, like,
the... like, the little
"Watch your back."
- I think she's a sniper
from the side.
I think she doesn't want
to leave any fingerprints.
That's what I think.
- I feel like I'm kinda, like,
ratting out Erika,
but, you know, like,
I'm not saying something
I wouldn't say to everybody.
Erika may not have said exactly,
"Don't get caught in her web,"
but that was the message of it.
It was like, whether she said,
"Don't drink Vanderpump's
Kool-Aid,"
She was trying to warn me,
"Don't get fooled
by Vanderpump."
Like, you know... like, just...
- "Watch your back."
- Yeah.
- "Watch Lisa's cobwebs
down there."
- It kind of pisses me off
that Erika would say that.
Don't get caught in my web?
I barely have time
to go to the bathroom.
What do they think I'm doing?
Spinning a web?
I mean, it's just...
child's play.
But why would she say that?
"Get tangled in her web?"
She said that?
- I didn't know...
- Yeah.
- What would be
the point of that?
I don't... I'm confused by that.
- Yeah, I'm confused by that.
That's weird.
You're your own person.
Make your own decision.
- Kathryn telling
everybody at the table
what Erika said.
I thought she was
smarter than that.
I have a feeling...
I think this has to do...
This has to do... this has to do
with the Hamptons.
When you and I were talking
about what had happened
at the dinner party
two nights before.
I think what it was is that
I never really felt
like the apology was...
Wasn't super sincere,
I felt you felt more
on the spot about it
instead of understanding
where I was coming from,
and maybe she picked up on that.
- But that was not a big deal.
Ponies are going to wine bar.
- Well, maybe that's it, because
she witnessed the whole thing.
- What she's trying
to warn me about?
- I can't think of
any other thing, can you?
- No.
Seems like making a big deal
out of nothing.
- Oh, come on, Eileen.
You must have too much
time on your hands
to come up with
this conspiracy theory.
"You spin a web
because you inadvertently
said something in the Hamptons"?
I thought we talked about that.
- It's called communication.
Well, you know, I guess
on some level we did,
but it never really felt like
you understood
where I was coming from.
- I said I'm sorry if I was
clumsy with words and you said...
- You said you were sorry
you asked too many questions.
- Yeah.
I apologize if I...
asked you too many questions...
[laughs]
I'm sorry for asking you
about your life,
but I only ever looked
at your relationship...
- Well, that's not my life.
That's a tiny part of my life.
- Okay.
Well, I can't do anything
right, then, can I?
I do have a habit
of minimizing things.
- That's, honestly...
- Maybe I do, maybe I do.
- You know what?
- I do minimize.
I always say, "Oh, okay,
it's not a big deal."
- And maybe that's
a very important thing,
that you have a habit
of minimizing, and...
- You're right, I am...
- That you didn't hear
what I was really saying,
I felt more
that you were thinking about how
you didn't... you felt like
I'd offended you
by being truthful with you.
It felt like you just,
kind of, dismissed me.
And that we're glossing over
things that are uncomfortable.
Maybe that's the problem
with Yolanda as well.
It's glossing over things
to just carry on,
but things aren't
really resolved.
- Oh, my gosh.
Eileen?
You've got balls.
[tense music]
I feel like saying to Lisa,
"Just say 'I'm sorry'
and get it over with."
Just say it. It's easy.
"I'm sorry."
Done. Bam. Boom. Let's move on.
- The ponies have just
run out by the pool,
but you're right.
I-I need to work on that.
Whatever I need to work on.
I do... I don't.
I'm not going to...
The ponies have just left
and running around the pool.
- Thank God for the ponies.
Once again, I'm just trying to
have a discussion
with Lisa Vanderpump,
and she's dismissing me.
She never just
looks me in the eye
and talks to me
about what happened.
Always deflecting,
always moving around it,
always looking for an excuse
not to just talk to me about it.
- Can you pass that over there?
- You know what?
It's like... for some people,
being just P.C.,
and brushing everything
with flowers, this and that,
works,
and for other people,
it doesn't.
- What makes me sad about this
is that honestly,
in just trying to talk to you,
I feel like you feel like
I'm attacking you.
- I do.
- I know you do.
And that's how you did
the first time I brought it up.
I can't express myself to you.
- It's that hard to talk to me?
Really?
I invited you to my house
to have dinner
the day after my birthday.
You don't even bring me
a bloody card,
and it's hard to talk to me?
Really?
Okay, well, I'm... okay, well,
what... what can I do?
- Nothing! Nothing!
- I'm sorry I...
- It's not... I'm not asking you
to do anything, Lisa.
I'm really not. - Right.
- I'm just talking it out,
and letting you know
how I was feeling.
You said... - [groans]
I'm a man, I'm not a woman.
I can't deal with this. I can't.
I said I'm sorry...
- Again, I'm attacking
by trying to talk.
- I get it that Eileen
is looking for something,
but the bottom line is,
if you've asked for it
three times,
and it's only getting worse,
let it go.
Move on.
- If we can end it here,
I'm truly sorry
for saying the wrong thing.
Asking... asking
too many questions,
or saying the wrong thing,
or at the wrong time...
- It's okay. It's all right.
- Or at the wrong time, or...
Or for saying anything at all!
- You know what? We're good.
- For anything at all.
Are we, or are you
gonna bring it up again?
[sighing]
- We're good.
- How good?
How good?
'Cause I need to be
really fáááing good
to move on.
♪ ♪
- Coming up...
- You're right,
I'm a terrible fáááing person.
- You don't have to be
the victim here.
- [sighs]
- We're good.
- How good?
How good?
'Cause I need to be
really fáááing good
to move on.
♪ ♪
- It's fine. It's fine.
- Oh, you're brushing it
under the carpet.
- Honestly, I don't think that
we're really
gonna understand the situation
the same way.
I can tell by the way
you're acting right now.
Honestly. That's what I mean.
- Okay, I give up, then.
- I understand that you...
I know, I get...
I get what you're feeling,
and you think
that somehow you can't
do the right thing.
- Maybe we just don't...
Maybe we won't ever
get each other.
Maybe I thought we would...
- Maybe.
- And maybe we just
don't get each other.
- Maybe, that could be.
- Okay, I'll go with that.
- Okay.
- I'll go with that then.
Eileen seems
overly emotional to me.
Maybe we're just
built differently.
Just...
- We'll just wrap that up
in a bow.
- Okay.
Well, I-I'm trying everything.
- Okay. Okay.
Apologizing just because
you don't want to have
any confrontation?
I don't need it.
Let's move on. - Okay.
- I'm beyond
the apology, people.
I don't care about the apology.
I don't like the way she tries
to get out from under something,
or from just being accountable.
Or taking responsibility.
That's it.
- I don't like
to make a big deal
and make everything petty and
nasty out of fáááing nothing.
- No. No, no.
- Yeah, but Lisa, you're talking
about people's feelings.
- You're right,
I'm a terrible fáááing person.
- It's not... Lisa, there you go.
You just did it again.
- Yeah, you're right.
I'm terrible.
- You don't have to be
the victim here.
- Mm.
Okay. [sighs]
Does anybody want, um,
another bottle of wine?
- Later this season,
on "The Real Housewives
of Beverly Hills"...
- Welcome to my jewel suite.
- This is incredible.
- Beautiful.
Hook a sister up. - Hi, Erika.
- I've been waiting to meet you.
Who did not have a crush
on Harry Hamlin, okay?
He's hot. How are you?
- Good. Thanks.
Missed you. Love you.
Not really. Awkward.
- We're in Dubai!
- This is our room?
- Oh ho! Oh, look at that shark!
[laughing]
[screaming]
- This is magical.
- Are you okay?
- I feel like
there's something else.
- Maybe she's the one
that's, like...
Fell out of love with him.
- Have more faith in me.
- I don't really know how.
- I felt like you just threw
a dart at me, honestly.
- I never know
what I'm gonna get.
- What would they do if they
didn't have anyone to pick on?
- I don't know.
- They'd have to turn
on each other.
- My trust issues
are through the fáááing roof.
- When you're a people pleaser,
it leaves you open
to people manipulating you.
- Wait, wait. I'm not done yet.
- No, no. Wait a minute.
- Why are you being
so aggressive?
I would never come
to someone's home
and act like a fáááing ass.
- You have to leave.
- Hale-fáááing-lujah!
- Your behavior is erratic.
- You can't let it go.
- Lisa Rinna.
Think before you speak.
- I feel like you're
trying to discredit
my friendship with Yolanda.
- You may be more manipulative
than Lisa Vanderpump.
- Kathryn, you're wrong!
- When we were outside, Eileen...
Why do you care?
- I will not fáááing tell a lie.
- I've not asked you
to tell a lie.
- No, I'm asking you
not to tell one!
- To learn more about
the housewives,
Housewives of Beverly Hills"...
- With your husband, do you go
to dinners with him,
like, with clients and things?
- Yes.
- But I bet people are surprised
when you show up, right?
- Not anymore.
- You have great intellect,
but you have great insight.
- You have a powerful presence.
Lisa knows she's charming,
and she knows
when she can get you.
- Kept going on and asking
more and more things about it,
and "Is that
when the affair started?
Is that what happened?"
- Darling, I wouldn't want
to ask you anything
that you wouldn't want
to tell me.
- I kind of now feel
like I offended her,
which is weird.
- What's going on with Anwar and
Bella's Lyme disease?
- She says it's true, then
she knows more than I do.
- What does Mohamed say?
- No.
- Yolanda said that
she could have put it out there
that you were bipolar,
but she chose not to do that.
- You labeled Kim last year,
you labeled Brandi,
and now you're labeling me.
- And I'm sorry about that.
It's like putting a Band-Aid on,
but there's still blood gushing
all over the place.
I feel like I can't
let go of you now.
[upbeat music]
- My lips were made for talking,
and that's just what they'll do.
- In Beverly Hills,
you can be anything,
but it's most important
to be yourself.
- I'm an enigma
wrapped in a riddle and cash.
- I may be an actress,
but that doesn't mean
I'll stick to your script.
- Fake friends
believe in rumors.
Real friends believe in you.
- Don't hate the game.
Just marry a player.
- I'm passionate about dogs,
just not crazy about bitches.
[upbeat music]
- You have your ass pads in?
- Feel 'em.
- Oh, my God.
- [laughs]
♪ ♪
- Hey, there.
- We're ready.
- Has our group arrived yet?
I'm at an advantage 'cause
I do this all the time,
but he hasn't been spinning
for a long time.
- Are we gonna have to build
houses after this?
- Uch, I don't know.
Richard!
- Muah, thank you for coming.
- You know I have, like,
the endurance of a gnat.
- Hello, ladies.
- How are you?
Donnie.
Thank you so much, brother.
- Yeah, absolutely.
- So Kyle,
what are we doing today?
- They're affiliated with
Habitat for Humanity.
They choose a family
to build a home for
and we come here, we raise
money, and we go out there
and we actually help build
the homes for the family.
- When do we do that?
- Are we gonna do that?
- In two weeks
or something like that.
- Mauricio and his company,
The Agency,
partnered with SoulCycle
to raise money
for Giveback Homes.
- There's so many
people in here.
- This isn't a private party.
This is for charity.
Get your ass on the bike.
Each person in this class has
donated $250 minimum.
- Let's have some fun, huh?
Let's raise some money,
and let's have some fun.
- Yes!
- Thank you.
- I would love it if you'd stay
for 45 minutes.
- 45 minutes?
Are you out of your mind?
- Let... hold on.
I gotta be with Mo.
- Did he say
"Four to five minutes"
or "45 minutes"?
- Four to... [laughs] 45!
- I'd rather do
four to five minutes,
and then I'll write a check.
45 minutes is not gonna happen.
Haven't done 45 minutes
straddling anything.
Well, not since 1984.
- Hey, everybody!
[cheers and applause] Whoo!
- I know we've raised somewhere
around $10,000 here today.
On behalf of Kyle and myself,
we're gonna make a donation
of $5,000 today.
- Raising money
via SoulCycle classes
is the new wave of the future
in Beverly Hills.
Forget bake sales,
standing in the street.
Are you kidding me?
- How much do I have to donate
if I wanna go straight home?
- At least a house.
- Follow me, keeping in mind
that every bike
is a little different,
every body is
a little different,
so just honor whatever
you carried in here today.
Any trouble, any drama,
any fears
that you may have carried
into the room.
What if you just felt
all of that stuff melt away?
- Hear what he's saying?
They say inspiring things.
- Yeah?
- Are we starting to get sweat
a little bit yet?
- Oh, no way!
[dance music]
Ha! Ow!
Four... three...
two, let it go,
find the beat, right foot...
- Ooh, that instructor, honey.
He was living!
Richard Simmons, Zoolander,
crossed with, like,
West Hollywood fabulousness.
- I'd like to go home now.
- Lisa, are you starting
to believe yet?
Am I making you a believer?
- Oh, bless Vanderpump's heart.
Oh, she's just not used to it.
She's just not built
for this kind of activity.
- Mauricio, this is
an awesome event.
Thank you for having us.
- Ross, thank you so much.
- Great job, guys.
- [laughs]
She came in pink
patent leather pumps
for the class.
Seriously.
- Vanderpump!
Are you taking a shower?
- Yeah.
- Whoo!
- The SoulCycle event
was a huge success.
We raised a lot of money
and everyone had fun.
Except Lisa Vanderpump.
I don't think she had fun.
- She wants to come back
tomorrow with me.
I was like, "Why?"
- Lot of energy.
- Actually, my first
and last time.
- Okay, honey, I love you.
- All right, I love you.
I gotta go do a showing.
- I'm going to lunch
with the girls.
Thank you. - Thank you, guys.
- I'll ride on there.
[upbeat music]
I loved it. - Lisa loved it too.
Lisa was dying,
talking the whole time,
chewing my ear off.
Lisa's workout is
lifting her diamond watch.
Like this. - Yeah.
- She lifts rocks.
♪ ♪
- Thank you. Hi, how are you?
- Thank you.
- Oh, thank God.
It's cooled down.
- Yummy. Thank you.
- Who else is coming?
- Yolanda and Eileen are coming.
I thought Yolanda
didn't feel well enough.
- She texted me yesterday.
And said, if she was
feeling well enough,
she was even going to
come and spin.
- No.
- Yeah.
- The last time I saw Yolanda
and Lisa Rinna
was at Erika's house,
and it didn't really seem like
they resolved anything
with the "bipolar" comment.
- What you never said to her
was the bipolar comment.
- That's mean.
- She didn't really say
you were bipolar.
She said,
"I didn't call Lisa bipolar,
and I could have."
- Because of how I acted with
your sister last year.
- So I'm kind of curious to know
where they're at right now.
- Hi, you guys!
- Hi there! You look nice.
- How are you?
- Muah, muah.
- Did you just come from work?
- I came from work.
What do you want
on your guacamole?
- Tomatoes, cilantro, jalapenos?
- All of them. All of it.
If someone says
they don't want all of it,
they don't want good guacamole.
- Or they have to kiss somebody
at their job tomorrow.
- You have to kiss
someone at your job?
- No, I don't. I don't.
I'm just saying.
No, actually, I have to say,
things are kind of dry
for Ashley right now.
She's not... she's got no action.
- Who do you kiss?
Who's your guy? - Nobody.
She's in love with her
daughter's fiancé.
- [gasps]
- Ooh!
- Tramp!
- Scandalous!
- Have you guys, like,
gotten it together?
- No, we took a shower
together last year.
- What?
- What?
- Oh!
- I know.
He dragged me into the shower
and ripped my shirt off.
What are you doing?
- You said you wanted to help
sober me up, didn't you?
- This isn't exactly
what I had in mind.
- Me neither, but it's working.
- Let me ask you:
did you like it?
When he actually did it,
did you like it?
- I've got to tell you,
quite honestly,
it's very technical.
I'm sorry to disappoint you,
but it really is.
And you just want to make sure
it looks good,
and that it's sexy, and that
the shower's not
hitting the wrong place.
- They ripped it all off?
- Lookit, you're so funny!
Maybe Lisa Vanderpump
wants to be in a shower
getting her shirt ripped off.
- Hi! all: Hi!
- Happy birthday!
- Oh, thank you!
- Oh, for God's sakes.
Seriously?
- Thank you.
- Happy birthday, honey.
- Thanks, darling.
- Okay, I have a question.
Was this a birthday lunch that
nobody told me about?
- No, it wasn't.
- We don't have a present.
- No.
- Right.
- Well, it's another year,
I'm older and wiser,
but I don't want
to make a big deal
about my birthday this year.
But you know what?
I love the fact that
Yolanda bought me pink flowers.
It's a gesture,
and it's noted.
- So how was the... the biking?
- Oh, my God.
You're so lucky
you missed that class.
Yolanda, you have no idea.
- You know, I haven't been
in the gym for three years.
Obviously, if I was healthy,
I'd be spinning
my little ass off there,
but, you know, that's just
not where I'm at.
- Whenever people say,
"Oh, my God,
you're in such good shape,
what are you on?"
Like, "What are you doing?"
I always say, "It's HWB."
- What is that?
- It's "hard work, bitch."
- Let me see. Let me feel.
- Go ahead.
- Oh!
- Jesus!
No, make a muscle. [laughs]
- Kathryn and I,
we're just gonna box.
We're gonna do some mitts.
- Oh, I love boxing.
- I know.
- I would love to kick your ass.
- Honey, you can't kick my ass.
- She's like so serious.
Oh, my God.
- Wait, what do
you want of this?
- Look at this, Eileen. Look.
- She scares me.
- What do you want?
- You're right.
I'm getting myself into
trouble here with this girl.
She's taking me literally.
- No, we're not boxing
each other.
- Oh, we're not?
- You're not going in a ring.
- Easy, I need you guys
on Saturday.
- What are we doing Saturday?
- We're just gonna have
a little dinner at Wally's.
- At Wally's?
- Yeah.
- Oh, I thought we were
going to your house.
- No, it's too far.
You know, I haven't entertained
for the last 11 months,
so I would love to throw
a little dinner party
at Wally's so I don't have
the pressure of
having to hire people to
cook and clean and all that.
And where is, uh... where is Lisa?
- She's working.
- Oh, good.
Did I hear that, uh,
Harry might be
winning an Emmy?
- "Mad Men" is nominated,
and he was on that.
- He was amazing in that, yeah.
- Are you guys okay now?
- Yeah.
- You and Lisa Rinna?
- Yeah, why?
Yeah.
- You never know.
- We were okay the week before.
Let's not start
about this again.
- Yes.
- It's just strange to me how
everybody can
say something rude,
and have an argument,
and then hug it out,
or send flowers, and then
pretend like everything's fine
when it's very obvious
that it's not.
I don't think
that Yolanda knows that
Lisa Rinna knows about
Yolanda saying
that Lisa Rinna was bipolar.
- Yes, she does.
- How?
- She did.
She said it at the table.
- I'm not getting
involved with that.
- What'd you say?
- They can deal with it
themselves.
- What are you guys talking
about over there and whispering?
- Yeah, what are you
talking about?
- No, we were talking about
the conversation with Lisa Rinna
after Yolanda left.
- About bipolar?
- Yeah.
[tense music]
- Coming up...
- I hold a lot in the vault.
- Are you threatening me?
♪ ♪
- Have you strapped one on yet
and tried that?
- Yes.
No, I think a dildo's
just a good thing.
- Yeah, what are you
talking about?
What are you saying?
- No, we were talking about
the conversation
with Lisa Rinna
after Yolanda left.
- About bipolar?
- Yeah.
- Lisa Rinna says you said
she was bipolar.
- I never said
Lisa Rinna was bipolar.
From judging her
by her behavior,
if you throw a glass of wine
at somebody,
send somebody
a text message saying,
"I'm gonna come
and fááá you up,"
and then put the seed
that somebody
has a Munchausen-whatever
disease,
I could potentially
call her bipolar,
but I would never do that
because
it's not my place to do so.
Right? - Yeah.
- Lisa also didn't say
"You have Munchausen's."
She said someone else did,
so you're saying,
"I could say you have bipolar."
It's the same kind of thing.
It's putting it
out there anyway.
- Her and I worked it out,
and now you're
bringing it up again.
I... I told her that...
- I wasn't bringing it up
to you, Yolanda.
We were... we were just having
a conversation privately.
- Yolanda hasn't been
around a lot,
and she's taking this
kind of hard line.
Kyle's getting frustrated
because Yolanda's being
so dismissive.
Kind of condescending right now.
- Obviously Lisa said something
after Yolanda left
that they never got
any closure on.
- Listen, I mean,
it's not the first time
that somebody at a table
is gonna say,
"What's going on with,"
you know,
"so and so?"
Is... I mean, hello?
- The two of you are just, like,
whispering about that subject
is ridiculous.
[tense music]
Kyle and Lisa whispering
strikes a nerve in me.
That's the first thing
I taught my children.
You don't whisper, you know,
like this, in a group of women.
- Lisa Rinna came to us,
at her house, and said
the Munchausen thing.
So we're already involved!
We're there. We got sucked in.
- But it's done. It's done.
Lisa and I, we've worked it out.
We worked through it.
- I'm uncomfortable.
I like Kyle, and I like Yolanda.
And I don't like it
when things like this happen.
- You guys are done?
I don't care.
It's none of my business. I'm...
- Oh, you're making it
your business.
- You put a group of women
together,
immediately they start
tearing each other down,
angling, who's better friends
with this one,
who likes that one,
"You said"...
I don't give a sháá.
- So, I don't care. Whatever.
- It's fine. It's fine.
Just relax.
Have a glass of wine.
- Yolanda, I mean, come on.
Give me a fáááing break.
♪ ♪
Give me a break.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Lisa, I'm gonna walk you in.
- Great.
- You're gonna be sitting
to Jenny's left.
- Is she here? Is she here?
[screaming]
- You look gorgeous.
- I just got my face injected,
so it's sore.
Be careful.
I saw Terry Dubrow yesterday.
- Did he do it?
- He did... Sculptra?
- Why have I not done it?
I've done everything...
- Well, because
your face is perfect!
- No, Jenny.
- Look how cute you are.
Jenny and I have known
each other for so many years,
it's so fun to go on
and hang with your girlfriends.
I mean, how hard is that?
- I am so excited
that you're co-hosting.
- I can't believe
we're doing this finally.
- We're both talk-aholics.
Good luck to us both.
- Good luck to us both.
Good luck to the world.
- [laughs]
- Jenny's fearless,
and I love working
with people who are fearless.
She's honest,
and she's a girl's girl,
and she doesn't need
to put you down
in order to feel good
about herself.
- Welcome to "Dirty Sexy Funny."
I'm Jenny McCarthy.
[drumming on knees]
Lisa Rinna joining me today.
- Jenny! Hi!
- I love you.
- I love you.
You know, we go way back.
- Let's give people the history
a little bit.
- Okay.
- So, I moved to Sherman Oaks,
and Lisa opened up a shop,
and I feel like I was, like,
one of your first customers.
- You were, I think.
- And you were like,
"Oh, my God, hi.
I'll give you
a celebrity discount."
- [laughing]
- I was like, "Thank you, Lisa."
- So gracious of me.
- So gracious of you.
- I have to stay relevant.
It's part of my job.
I shamelessly stay relevant.
Of course. Honey.
We got bills to pay.
- A Tennessee woman
was arrested Sunday
for allegedly threatening
to post, on social media,
nude pics of a woman she found
on her boyfriend's phone.
Have you ever gotten nervous
with Harry at all?
Mm.
- Here's the thing with Harry.
It's really the guys
that I'm more nervous about.
It's the guys
that want to fááá Harry.
- Does he appreciate
the male physique at all?
[playful music]
- No, I will tell you that...
- Okay, so he loves pussy.
- Harry likes pussy. Period.
- Have you strapped one on yet
and tried that?
- Yes.
- It doesn't make you gay.
- No!
When I was very young,
my mom said to me,
"That mouth of yours
is gonna get you
into trouble someday."
I don't know why
I even strapped it...
I think I just wanted to try it.
This mouth has gotten me
into so much trouble,
and I've also made a giant,
enormous amount of money
from this mouth
getting me in trouble.
♪ ♪
No, I think a dildo's
just a good thing.
- I do too.
- A big one.
[laughter]
You're so good.
You're such a natural.
[hip-hop music]
- I'm telling you not to talk
about me or Lisa Rinna
when Rinna's not here
to defend herself.
- I was talking
to a close friend of mine
in a corner, alone.
- A close friend of yours?
- You guys were having
a conversation.
- Please.
- Well, we are
close friends right now.
- Good.
They're close friends
when it works in their favor.
- Oh...
- Wait, I owe you one!
- [screams]
- And, at times, they're not.
- At least admit
one thing you've done wrong.
- Kyle, I was...
- Can you not say one thing?
- So, little bit
suspicious to me.
I get what you're saying, Kyle,
I'm just asking you to drop it.
I hold a lot
in the vault, honey.
- What does that mean?
Are you threatening me?
- It means that... no, not at all.
Not at all.
No, I have more integrity
than that.
Why are you so angry today?
- Because you are being
rude to me, Yolanda.
- I am not being rude.
I don't intend to be rude at.
- I think everyone at the table
may beg to differ.
I would think. I don't know.
- You know it's funny,
it's so much of, like,
it's not what you say,
it's how you say it.
- Even if you say it
in a nice, calm voice
with a smile on your face,
you know what I'm talking about.
- I'm not... I honestly
am not trying
to be rude with you at all.
- Yes, Yolanda had tone.
100%, Yolanda
had tone with Kyle.
But she doesn't want to hear it,
she wants to have
a nice luncheon,
and boom, you know, right away,
here we go again.
- I mean, Lisa's obviously got
residual feelings about
even the "bipolar" label
being out there.
- Yeah, I still have mixed
feelings about the Munchausen...
- And I understand that.
- And your shááá
about my children,
but I don't bring it up.
- What do you mean, and my sháá
about your children...
I've never talked sháá
about your children,
and I defended your children
when that... the town drunk
turned around and she said,
"Oh, Bella, it's reported
that she's an alcoholic."
- You're saying,
am I an alcoholic?
You heard that
about your daughter.
- I didn't need you
to stand up...
My daughter is not an alcoholic.
- I think what
she's saying is that
she never said anything
about your kids.
- No, I would never
say anything negative.
- That's all, she's just trying
to keep that straight.
- Never.
[tense music]
All right. I'm going to go.
I will see you.
I will see you again.
And I'm gonna go do
what I've got to do.
- Okay, bye.
- I'll talk to you later.
- Bye.
- [smooches]
♪ ♪
- I'm done.
I answered a question,
and said that I thought
they were healthy.
If that's talking sháá
about her kids, then...
but no, I never have,
and I never will.
- Yeah.
- I would have
really appreciated
Lisa staying here and
supporting me in this moment,
considering Yolanda was angry
with both of us.
It's stupid.
♪ ♪
Excuse me.
Could we get the check, please?
♪ ♪
[sighs]
- Coming up...
- I think she engages
from the side.
I think she doesn't want
to leave any fingerprints.
- Don't get caught in her web.
♪ ♪
- All the way from Brentwood!
- Hey, babe!
- I appreciate you coming over.
Let's eat first,
and then we'll work out.
♪ ♪
- Is that a cinnamon roll?
- It is.
- Oh, I love you.
- Pretty day today.
- This is beautiful.
Honestly, that looks
so custard-y and delicious.
I know you made this too.
- I slaved all day.
Look, I don't cook.
You know, I went right to
the cute place around the corner
and got the food.
I did not... I don't make sháá.
- Tell me about you.
- What do you want to know?
Why do you want to know, first.
- I want to know because
I want to be your friend.
- Okay.
- And I feel like
I can't be good friends
if I don't know who you are
and what you're about.
I want Erika to open up
to me a little bit.
I want to know why she is
the way she is,
that she's so closed off,
and she kind of, like,
has, like,
this whole persona that
she doesn't want
to let anyone in.
- I'm cold.
- Are you cold?
- Very.
- Really?
- Very fáááing cold.
- She's a ice princess.
Do you have women friends?
- I have never been
well-liked by women.
I think I could point back
to being a child.
I was very open and sensitive
and artistic,
and I think that
I got my feelings hurt
by a group of girls
when I was in middle school,
and that's... - Mean girls?
- Yeah, pretty much.
I want to have a group
of women friends.
I've never had a group
of women friends,
and the reason is because
I just don't trust it.
It's not that I'm not open
to having women friends,
because I have them.
They're just few
and far between.
I want really good women
in my life,
not just any old broad
that comes in.
I'm a lot to handle,
and I look at certain way.
- You feel like you get judged.
- Very quickly.
Well, Yolanda's my friend.
She's loving.
She's compassionate.
She's kind of like my go-to guy.
Except she's a girl. [laughs]
I'll tell you, the closest
was my grandmother that I lost.
She had a long battle
with Alzheimer's,
and I'm glad that
that's over for her.
- Oh, honey.
- Oh, no, it's fine.
I mean, that...
I put this in perspective
long ago.
You know, she was great.
She was really good.
- And you trusted her.
- But... oh, my God, yeah.
- That's...
- She and I were close.
But, you know. Things happen.
People get old. They die.
It's the natural way of life.
- I see the pain,
I see the love,
and I think,
when she lost her grandmother,
that she lost
a big part of that...
That safe place.
It makes me understand her more
because what I went through
with my father dying.
When you want
to get on the phone
and just, like, call someone and
talk, and like, just yak...
- She's gone. She's dead.
- Your grandma.
- [chuckles]
I'm still the same brat...
[laughs]
That, uh,
I was when she was alive.
I-I don't think
I've changed much
since she, uh, passed away.
[somber music]
♪ ♪
I definitely miss her.
Very much.
- You can call me.
I will be your first
genuine woman friend.
- Like, you're not gonna
side with someone
and go run off with them...
- If someone did something
where the other person really
couldn't defend themself...
- You would step in.
- Yeah, I... yeah.
- There are
cool girls everywhere,
and there are
bitches everywhere.
You know, you just have to
weed through and find out.
I got news for you.
I think all of these bitches
can defend themselves.
- I agree.
Some more than others.
- Yeah.
It is a case by case basis.
What do you think
of Lisa Vanderpump?
- She's a nice... she's so... she...
- [forced laughter]
- She's not sweet?
- No.
- So you're saying
she's underhanded.
[lively music]
♪ ♪
- Hi, how are you?
- Hello, Lisa, nice to see you.
- Where are the flowers here?
- They moved them right here.
- Okay, put them back.
Well, okay,
I'm going to sit over here.
- Right.
- Been so crazy busy.
I haven't been here that much.
Can I have a glass
of rosé, please?
- And a beer for me, please,
young man.
- So what's going on?
I just... I was in PUMP,
and I walked past Chi Chi LaRue,
and they've moved out.
The sex shop's moved out.
It's gone.
- It's nice in here.
- Oh, my God.
Some of this
looks a bit bizarre even to me.
- Yeah, but we're not
looking at the stock,
we're looking at the premises.
I'm paying rent on it.
- We are paying rent on it.
- I'm using my savings.
- You and me.
Your savings and my savings.
- No, I'm... I've put it up
for a temporary let.
I've got five people
looking at it.
- What's the city said?
- It's in planning.
At this moment,
there's no fourth restaurant,
and the pressure's off.
I feel happy
if Lisa feels happy, so...
- So, I went to, um...
I went to the SoulCycle.
Literally, I was,
"Okay, I'm over this."
I'm gonna kill Kyle.
[upbeat music]
- Annoying.
♪ ♪
[doorbell rings]
- Coming. One second.
Look at you! - Hi!
Oh, my gosh. Come in.
- So, I want a little
catch-up time.
- Oh! [laughing]
Oh, well there's lots
to fill you in on.
- Yes, I have a feeling.
- Come in.
- You look pretty! Hi.
- Well, you have a feeling
'cause you saw the email.
- Yes, I did.
- Brutal.
- So, I... my head is spinning.
- Yolanda wrote me an email,
and CC'd all the women
in the group.
I thought she always
makes a point to say,
"If you have a problem,
we keep it between us.
You come to me to talk it out,"
so why does she send
a scolding email
to me and CC everyone else?
- What happened?
What's going on?
- Well, okay.
We all went, after the SoulCycle
thing, to Frida...
- Yeah.
- [sighs] This is...
It's just, the whole thing with
Yolanda's so... you know...
- And she was there.
- She came.
Which was great. - Yeah.
- We've had zero issues.
- Right.
- Now she sends an email
addressed to me,
basically scolding me...
[rousing music]
♪ ♪
- At lunch,
I was just so frustrated.
When things are said
in a stressful situation,
my brain shuts down,
so then I can't say
what I want to say,
so I got up
in the middle of the night
and wrote an email to Kyle...
- "Kyle, I've been thinking
about yesterday,
and you know, I don't
appreciate"... and telling me,
"You should research
Lyme disease.
It's not a pretty look
for you not to be"...
First of all, I am sympathetic.
I've always said that.
- I explained to her,
from a very clear point of view,
what I had to say
about her behavior,
and I wanted all the other girls
to hear it as well.
- I did see the email in the...
You know, like,
11th hour, and I was like...
- And CC-ing all of you?
"I'm coming out of
a three-year ordeal
"of living in
a mentally paralyzed cocoon
"due to an infection in my brain
call neuroborreliosis."
- "I arrived with a great
attitude yesterday,
"and proud of myself
for making it out of bed
and joining you girls."
"For you to come down
on me so hard
"is beyond my understanding,
and it left me quite confused."
- "I just trying to catch up
and participate.
"I don't need your pity,
but I do ask you kindly
to respect my situation."
- "Your lack of compassion
is not a pretty look."
- She was like, you know,
"I'm over this," you know,
"the
Munchen... munchen... whatever."
- Right.
- And, um, "I'm over the bipolar
and you talking sháá
about my kids,"
she said to Lisa.
- None of it makes sense.
It is passive aggression
at its finest.
And projection.
There's something going on.
- Then Lisa just leaves.
- She did?
- It just, you know,
it got... not good.
- Me. Me!
Talking sháá about kids.
I was just pissed off.
I was pissed off.
- Uh, but, really,
that's annoying when somebody
attacks you over something
that you never said...
- I know, I know.
- And never would do.
- I don't understand it.
Anyway, look,
just telling you what happened
at drinks.
So I left,
and then I got this email
that wasn't addressed to me.
It was addressed to Kyle.
So there's obviously
pretty intense feelings.
- And then she said... on top of
all that, she says,
um, "You know, I have things
in my vault
that I could bring up
and I don't talk about."
- What does that mean?
- I mean, is that a threat?
I don't even know
what that means.
- Well, it sounds like a threat.
I mean... - Yeah.
- "Things in my vault"?
A good friend
doesn't store secrets
to use them at a later date.
It's very similar to Kim saying,
"I know something
about your husband."
- Let's talk about the husband.
- Oh, wait. Excuse me?
Did you just say,
"Let's talk about the husband?"
- Let's not talk about
what you don't want out.
- Never go after...
- Everybody will know!
Everybody will know...
- My fáááing husband!
That's a vicious, mean,
narcissist that does that.
It's an empty threat,
and only pussies do that.
If you want to think that...
You know,
two moments of me, like,
losing my sháá
are making me look
like I'm bipolar,
okay, but I understand
why she'd want to...
You know, do that.
- Yeah, yeah.
- I do. I get that.
You want to hurt back. - Yeah.
- At the end of the day, I have
a lot of sympathy for her.
I really do.
Now, will we ever
be best friends?
Maybe not.
It's all very strange.
Anyway, I gotta go,
because I have got
Kyle, Kathryn, and Eileen
coming 'round to the house.
Erika and Rinna can't make it.
I'm gonna have
an early dinner with them, and
I know you've got a meeting...
- What am I doing?
- You've got a meeting at 6:00.
I know your schedule.
I know what you're doing
before you even do it.
- That's true.
- Okay, so I have to go
to four Emmy parties
with my husband.
- And a red carpet, probably.
- Yeah, no, I'm putting on
my Mrs. Harry Hamlin hat
and, you know,
I'm actually quite glad
that I'm not going to join
any of you.
- Yes.
[upbeat music]
- Vanderpump? She's not sweet?
- No, she is sweet.
But she's smart.
I think she engages
from the side.
I think she's a sniper
from the side.
I think she doesn't want
to leave any fingerprints.
That's what I think.
I can sense Lisa Vanderpump...
crafting the situation
to her advantage.
Well, it started
in the Hamptons with Eileen.
- You did say to me,
"So, is that
when the affair started?"
- Yeah, I just wish,
at the time, you'd have said,
"Oh, you know what, you're
asking me too many questions."
- I was just trying to tell you
what I was feeling.
- Okay. Don't worry about it.
- And then I watched the stuff
with Yolanda and her children.
- He didn't think
that they had it.
- He doesn't think they have it?
- No, I don't want to
get involved.
- And it just seems
as if there's this
current, or this tone,
moving everything
to her advantage.
She's not gonna be blunt
'cause she doesn't think
it'll serve her later.
- Because it comes back
and bites her in the ass?
- Perhaps.
- Doesn't make her look good?
- Right.
- To be honest?
- She's selectively honest.
I think some people are
more manipulative than others.
- Oh, absolutely.
- You know?
- I think some people can
spot that more than others.
- You know, it is what it is.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Coming up...
- Ken, will you call the ponies?
- "Call the ponies!"
- "Bring the giraffe!"
- "And where is that zebra?"
- "Where's the llama?"
It's like Noah's ark. [laughs]
♪ ♪
- Rocio, any chance
of a cup of tea?
- I know you're...
- On my lazy ass.
Gracias.
This could go horribly wrong.
- It's nice. Your pink flamingo.
- Thank you.
It was my birthday yesterday,
and I wanted to float around
on a pink flamingo,
and I loved every
pink inch of it.
Rocio, is the chicken
almost done?
- Yeah.
- Do you want to just
take it out?
The chicken? - Yeah, okay.
[techno music]
♪ ♪
- What do you want to serve
your friends, drinks-wise?
- The cheapest crap
we want to get rid of.
[laughter]
- You have to be kidding me.
This is too funny,
and you have got a cup of tea.
Where's the ponies?
- Oh, they're out playing.
They'll be in later.
- This is like a petting zoo.
You know, it's like Noah's ark.
We've got the puppies,
we've got the ponies,
we've got the swans.
This is not normal
Beverly Hills.
- Let's go downstairs.
We'll have a drink
in the wine bar.
- Okay.
- And then we're gonna eat.
- Hi, Hanky and Panky.
♪ ♪
- I thought we'd just have
a glass of wine and sit here.
- This is lovely.
I've never been down here.
Wow. - Thank you.
- That's beautiful.
This is gorgeous.
- Oh, thanks, darling.
So this is our little wine bar.
Well, do you remember,
Bethany had a wine bar,
and I was just like,
"I don't want to compete!"
- Oh, this is your own bar.
- What do you think, Ken?
You approve?
- I love it. Yes.
- Hello, ladies.
- Hi!
- Hi, sweetie pie.
- Muah!
- Hi, girls. both: Hi!
- How are you?
- Good.
How are you? - Good.
- Good to see you.
- Good to see you.
- Hi, how are you?
- Muah!
- [gasps]
- Oh, no!
- Schnooky!
- Oh, my gosh!
Can I hold him? - I'm not sure.
- So cute.
- Give me a kiss.
All: Oh! - Oh, my gosh.
- Sexy boy!
- I want to get a dog.
- Isn't he a sexy boy?
- I'll let you hold him.
- Thank you. Hi, mommy.
- No way!
I have a new dog, Schnooky,
and I am absolutely in love
with his little furry body.
Come on, then.
Let's go and sit out there.
- Ooh!
[upbeat music]
- Oh, this is pretty in here.
- This is very lovely.
- This is so pretty!
- I kind of did it, like,
really country down here.
You know?
It has a different feel.
- It is really country.
- The boondocks.
Country bumpkins.
- Can you even stand it?
- Look, there's the retrievers.
They've just come back
from a long walk.
- Oh, babies!
- Come on, you guys. Come on.
[Schnooky whines]
- He does look like you, Ken.
Hold him up next to your face.
It's like twins. - Oh, yeah.
- He looks like all our animals.
That's the problem.
- Come on!
- So cute.
- Ken, will you call the ponies?
- "Call the ponies!"
- "Ken, bring the giraffe!"
- "And where is that zebra?"
- "Where's the llama?"
- What about when I took
the llama through your house?
- Oh!
- Do you remember?
Have you got a diaper?
- She's not going in my house!
- Okay, the party's started!
- I was joking.
- Let me just go and get
some crispy rice.
- Oh, let's get
some crispy rice!
[laughs] - What is it?
- Look at those boobies!
- You mean...
- What's wrong with my tits
and my accent?
- Nothing. They're lovely.
Both of them are lovely.
[laughter]
- That email was really awkward.
[tense music]
- She's struggling.
- I agree.
- And I think that email
was her way
of trying to organize
her thoughts.
- But, come on.
To basically reprimand me
and include everyone in an email
is a little inappropriate.
It was weird.
- It just pulls everyone in.
Everyone gets pulled in,
and before long,
it's like you're in it
whether you wanted to be or not.
Oh... oh, my gosh. Stop it.
Now the ponies are coming in.
- Hi, ponies.
- You can't beat this.
Like... - I know, ponies, right?
- I gotta take a picture
for Donnie.
He... I told him that
there's little ponies,
and he didn't believe me,
he's like,
"Come on. Not really."
- Really, I know.
That was Ken's birthday present.
- He doesn't believe it.
- Would you like a crispy rice?
They're from my restaurant.
- Yeah, I love those.
- Um, anyway, we were just
talking about the email.
- [sighs]
- For somebody who's very, like,
foggy-headed,
it seemed like
a very clear email.
Lisa's not about her being sick.
No one doubts she's sick.
We all know...
- Said that a million times.
We know she's got Lyme disease.
- She's definitely suffering
with Lyme disease
and whatever else it is
that she has, and...
- I-I think she feels
attacked a lot.
- Uh, excuse me, how did I feel
when she threw
that crap out there
about her children?
I had to defend myself.
- You never spoke
against her children.
- Never!
- Ever. Ever.
So clearly, her saying that...
- I never... I wouldn't want to.
- She must not be
the biggest fan,
if she's saying that,
because that's not even true.
You never said that.
And, you know...
- Kyle, are you defending me?
- Well, it's the truth.
- Thank you.
- You never said one thing
about her children.
- And you know what?
They're lovely kids.
- Hi. Fine. How are you?
- Hi, Rocio.
- We've just got
some roast chicken.
I made it. It was so simple.
- Fantastic.
- And just some green salad.
Thanks, Rocio. - You're welcome.
- Did you put my dressing on it?
- Yeah, I did.
- Thanks.
- Is that okay
for all of you guys?
Do you want
a tomato and burrata?
- Nice.
- Yes, thank you.
- You know,
I had lunch with Erika...
- And you worked out together.
- Yeah, we boxed.
- All right. Jab, cross, up. Go.
- Jab, cross...
- Beautiful.
- Jab, cross, up.
Ah, aah.
And then a cross at the end.
- Who are... who are you
hitting right now?
- You know, I really don't
have beef with anyone.
I'm good. - How was that?
- It was nice.
She had two trainers come,
and quite handsome.
- Handsome trainers?
- [laughs]
- Did she open up a bit more?
- She did.
She actually shed... six tears?
And then we started talking
about Vanderpump.
- What?
- Coming up...
- We're good.
- How good?
'Cause I need to be
really fáááing good.
She spoke of her grandmother,
which is her soft spot.
I mean, like,
she had tears come down
and didn't really
have expression,
but she sucked it right back up.
And then we started talking
about everything else, and...
- What was her take on
what happened the other day?
- She said basically, like,
in so many words,
that, you know, just to be,
like, aware of you.
- Who?
- Vanderpump.
- What?
- And then she said,
"Don't let her steer you, and
don't get caught in her web."
- Oh.
- And I... yeah.
- That's weird.
- Those aren't the words
she used, but like,
something like... like, basically,
I got the feeling like
I was getting, like,
the... like, the little
"Watch your back."
- I think she's a sniper
from the side.
I think she doesn't want
to leave any fingerprints.
That's what I think.
- I feel like I'm kinda, like,
ratting out Erika,
but, you know, like,
I'm not saying something
I wouldn't say to everybody.
Erika may not have said exactly,
"Don't get caught in her web,"
but that was the message of it.
It was like, whether she said,
"Don't drink Vanderpump's
Kool-Aid,"
She was trying to warn me,
"Don't get fooled
by Vanderpump."
Like, you know... like, just...
- "Watch your back."
- Yeah.
- "Watch Lisa's cobwebs
down there."
- It kind of pisses me off
that Erika would say that.
Don't get caught in my web?
I barely have time
to go to the bathroom.
What do they think I'm doing?
Spinning a web?
I mean, it's just...
child's play.
But why would she say that?
"Get tangled in her web?"
She said that?
- I didn't know...
- Yeah.
- What would be
the point of that?
I don't... I'm confused by that.
- Yeah, I'm confused by that.
That's weird.
You're your own person.
Make your own decision.
- Kathryn telling
everybody at the table
what Erika said.
I thought she was
smarter than that.
I have a feeling...
I think this has to do...
This has to do... this has to do
with the Hamptons.
When you and I were talking
about what had happened
at the dinner party
two nights before.
I think what it was is that
I never really felt
like the apology was...
Wasn't super sincere,
I felt you felt more
on the spot about it
instead of understanding
where I was coming from,
and maybe she picked up on that.
- But that was not a big deal.
Ponies are going to wine bar.
- Well, maybe that's it, because
she witnessed the whole thing.
- What she's trying
to warn me about?
- I can't think of
any other thing, can you?
- No.
Seems like making a big deal
out of nothing.
- Oh, come on, Eileen.
You must have too much
time on your hands
to come up with
this conspiracy theory.
"You spin a web
because you inadvertently
said something in the Hamptons"?
I thought we talked about that.
- It's called communication.
Well, you know, I guess
on some level we did,
but it never really felt like
you understood
where I was coming from.
- I said I'm sorry if I was
clumsy with words and you said...
- You said you were sorry
you asked too many questions.
- Yeah.
I apologize if I...
asked you too many questions...
[laughs]
I'm sorry for asking you
about your life,
but I only ever looked
at your relationship...
- Well, that's not my life.
That's a tiny part of my life.
- Okay.
Well, I can't do anything
right, then, can I?
I do have a habit
of minimizing things.
- That's, honestly...
- Maybe I do, maybe I do.
- You know what?
- I do minimize.
I always say, "Oh, okay,
it's not a big deal."
- And maybe that's
a very important thing,
that you have a habit
of minimizing, and...
- You're right, I am...
- That you didn't hear
what I was really saying,
I felt more
that you were thinking about how
you didn't... you felt like
I'd offended you
by being truthful with you.
It felt like you just,
kind of, dismissed me.
And that we're glossing over
things that are uncomfortable.
Maybe that's the problem
with Yolanda as well.
It's glossing over things
to just carry on,
but things aren't
really resolved.
- Oh, my gosh.
Eileen?
You've got balls.
[tense music]
I feel like saying to Lisa,
"Just say 'I'm sorry'
and get it over with."
Just say it. It's easy.
"I'm sorry."
Done. Bam. Boom. Let's move on.
- The ponies have just
run out by the pool,
but you're right.
I-I need to work on that.
Whatever I need to work on.
I do... I don't.
I'm not going to...
The ponies have just left
and running around the pool.
- Thank God for the ponies.
Once again, I'm just trying to
have a discussion
with Lisa Vanderpump,
and she's dismissing me.
She never just
looks me in the eye
and talks to me
about what happened.
Always deflecting,
always moving around it,
always looking for an excuse
not to just talk to me about it.
- Can you pass that over there?
- You know what?
It's like... for some people,
being just P.C.,
and brushing everything
with flowers, this and that,
works,
and for other people,
it doesn't.
- What makes me sad about this
is that honestly,
in just trying to talk to you,
I feel like you feel like
I'm attacking you.
- I do.
- I know you do.
And that's how you did
the first time I brought it up.
I can't express myself to you.
- It's that hard to talk to me?
Really?
I invited you to my house
to have dinner
the day after my birthday.
You don't even bring me
a bloody card,
and it's hard to talk to me?
Really?
Okay, well, I'm... okay, well,
what... what can I do?
- Nothing! Nothing!
- I'm sorry I...
- It's not... I'm not asking you
to do anything, Lisa.
I'm really not. - Right.
- I'm just talking it out,
and letting you know
how I was feeling.
You said... - [groans]
I'm a man, I'm not a woman.
I can't deal with this. I can't.
I said I'm sorry...
- Again, I'm attacking
by trying to talk.
- I get it that Eileen
is looking for something,
but the bottom line is,
if you've asked for it
three times,
and it's only getting worse,
let it go.
Move on.
- If we can end it here,
I'm truly sorry
for saying the wrong thing.
Asking... asking
too many questions,
or saying the wrong thing,
or at the wrong time...
- It's okay. It's all right.
- Or at the wrong time, or...
Or for saying anything at all!
- You know what? We're good.
- For anything at all.
Are we, or are you
gonna bring it up again?
[sighing]
- We're good.
- How good?
How good?
'Cause I need to be
really fáááing good
to move on.
♪ ♪
- Coming up...
- You're right,
I'm a terrible fáááing person.
- You don't have to be
the victim here.
- [sighs]
- We're good.
- How good?
How good?
'Cause I need to be
really fáááing good
to move on.
♪ ♪
- It's fine. It's fine.
- Oh, you're brushing it
under the carpet.
- Honestly, I don't think that
we're really
gonna understand the situation
the same way.
I can tell by the way
you're acting right now.
Honestly. That's what I mean.
- Okay, I give up, then.
- I understand that you...
I know, I get...
I get what you're feeling,
and you think
that somehow you can't
do the right thing.
- Maybe we just don't...
Maybe we won't ever
get each other.
Maybe I thought we would...
- Maybe.
- And maybe we just
don't get each other.
- Maybe, that could be.
- Okay, I'll go with that.
- Okay.
- I'll go with that then.
Eileen seems
overly emotional to me.
Maybe we're just
built differently.
Just...
- We'll just wrap that up
in a bow.
- Okay.
Well, I-I'm trying everything.
- Okay. Okay.
Apologizing just because
you don't want to have
any confrontation?
I don't need it.
Let's move on. - Okay.
- I'm beyond
the apology, people.
I don't care about the apology.
I don't like the way she tries
to get out from under something,
or from just being accountable.
Or taking responsibility.
That's it.
- I don't like
to make a big deal
and make everything petty and
nasty out of fáááing nothing.
- No. No, no.
- Yeah, but Lisa, you're talking
about people's feelings.
- You're right,
I'm a terrible fáááing person.
- It's not... Lisa, there you go.
You just did it again.
- Yeah, you're right.
I'm terrible.
- You don't have to be
the victim here.
- Mm.
Okay. [sighs]
Does anybody want, um,
another bottle of wine?
- Later this season,
on "The Real Housewives
of Beverly Hills"...
- Welcome to my jewel suite.
- This is incredible.
- Beautiful.
Hook a sister up. - Hi, Erika.
- I've been waiting to meet you.
Who did not have a crush
on Harry Hamlin, okay?
He's hot. How are you?
- Good. Thanks.
Missed you. Love you.
Not really. Awkward.
- We're in Dubai!
- This is our room?
- Oh ho! Oh, look at that shark!
[laughing]
[screaming]
- This is magical.
- Are you okay?
- I feel like
there's something else.
- Maybe she's the one
that's, like...
Fell out of love with him.
- Have more faith in me.
- I don't really know how.
- I felt like you just threw
a dart at me, honestly.
- I never know
what I'm gonna get.
- What would they do if they
didn't have anyone to pick on?
- I don't know.
- They'd have to turn
on each other.
- My trust issues
are through the fáááing roof.
- When you're a people pleaser,
it leaves you open
to people manipulating you.
- Wait, wait. I'm not done yet.
- No, no. Wait a minute.
- Why are you being
so aggressive?
I would never come
to someone's home
and act like a fáááing ass.
- You have to leave.
- Hale-fáááing-lujah!
- Your behavior is erratic.
- You can't let it go.
- Lisa Rinna.
Think before you speak.
- I feel like you're
trying to discredit
my friendship with Yolanda.
- You may be more manipulative
than Lisa Vanderpump.
- Kathryn, you're wrong!
- When we were outside, Eileen...
Why do you care?
- I will not fáááing tell a lie.
- I've not asked you
to tell a lie.
- No, I'm asking you
not to tell one!
- To learn more about
the housewives,