The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (2010–…): Season 5, Episode 11 - It's Just a Scratch - full transcript

Previously on The Real
Housewives of Beverly Hills...

(Lisa R) What I loved
about your event was,

everyone was shopping
like fools.

I am concerned about the ladies

liking a specific type
of jewelry.

These ladies wear
big, fat [bleep] diamonds.

I've known this man
since I'm just 19 years old.

My first husband, Monty,
is currently living with me

during chemo and radiation.

- Hey, how are you?
- Ornery.

- Are you drinking?
- Not today.



All right, good.
You're still sober.

It was a tragic mistake.

(Yolanda)
I thought the last thing
that would ever happen

is for Bella to have a drink
and get in a car,

but, you know, she did.

Whoo! You ready to party?

It's like family pictures
and then American Psycho.

[making shrill noise]

I want everyone to stop
acting stupid, and, like...

- I'm not acting stupid.
- You're just stupid.

I just don't know
how to play poker.

You don't even know
what you're doing.

- You stupid...
- I don't know what I'm doing.

[bleep] you.



(Eileen)
The evening is getting uglier
and uglier.

(Kyle)
It looks like you're drinking.

Come here for one second.

I deserve that at least.
Come here for one second.

- Stop it, stop it.
- No, no, no, excuse me.

(Kyle)
Hold on.
Please don't do that.

One second.
No, I want to talk to my sister.

[upbeat music]

Throw me to the wolves,

and I shall return
leading the pack.

Character isn't what you have;
it's who you are.

You've heard a lot about me,

but it's only true
when it comes from my lips.

I'm not a bitch,
but I've played one on TV.

I've been rich,
and I've been famous,

but happiness beats them both.

I'd rather spending my life
kicking ass than kissing it.

Planes and yachts are nice,
but my happiness starts at home.

- Stop it.
- Hold on.

Please don't do that.
One second.

No, I want to talk
to my sister for a second.

- Stop that.
- Don't [bleep] touch me.

Don't you [bleep]...

Wow, really?
Don't [bleep] touch me.

- Don't [bleep] do that.
- Don't [bleep] touch me.

(Brandi)
I don't know who the [bleep]
Kyle think she is

to tell Kim, a grown woman,
that she can't leave a party

when she wants to leave.

I'm sorry. She just pushed me.

I pushed her back.

- I'm sorry, I...
- Where's my pizza?

Oh, I threw it on the ground.

(Kyle)
I've seen Brandi's behavior

off the charts
with a lot of different people,

but now she's getting
physical again?

- Excuse me.
- Who asked you?

[both screaming]

No, stop.

Stop!

Don't you ever touch me
like that again.

(Kyle)
Right now,
this is personal.

She's coming between
my sister and me.

(Kim)
You didn't fight
with her, did you?

- I did.
- Uh-oh.

We have to get you gone.

We have to get you gone.

Get you gone.

(Kyle)
Brandi, I would like
to talk to my sister

without you for a second,

so get out of my face.

You just [bleep] hurt my finger.

Get away from me.
You're such an [bleep].

- Get away from me.
- You [bleep] started it.

No, because you wouldn't
let me talk to my sister.

- You touched me.
- Come here.

Because you wouldn't
let me near my sister.

Are you kidding? You grabbed me.

[both talking at once]

You're not my family,
so get out of my face.

I don't want you near me.

- Get away from me.
- All right, okay.

What's going on?
Are they fighting?

I think that you were
out of line in there.

(Kyle) About what?

What did I do? What did I do?

What you just said
in there was way wrong.

Tell me what I said.

(Brandi)
Over the past few months,

Kim has called me
a few times late at night,

and one time in particular,
I was really worried about her.

With Monty and the cancer,

and all of this
is just too much.

So I called Kyle and said,
"I'm really worried about Kim.

I don't know what to do here,"
and she said,

"It's not my problem.
This is just Kim."

I don't know what to do
at this point.

What's happening?

(Lisa R) What happened?

(Brandi) They hate each other.

It's a competition. It's sad.

(Eileen)
Two sisters
that just hate each other?

I mean, I can imagine
that they might have issues

between the two of them,
but that they hate each other?

Brandi, that's crazy.

I don't [bleep] know
what to say,

to be honest with you.

When sisters collide,

I don't know
what the [bleep] to do.

(Kyle)
Whisper in my ear
so I at least know.

I don't what you near me
right now.

I know. I see that.

I don't want you near me.

Get away from me.
I want you away from me.

I want to be with
my sister right now.

Why do you think
this is your business?

- It's not my business.
- Then go away.

[both shouting]

No, I'm not. [bleep] you.

Brandi, come on. Let them talk.

(Kyle)
No, I just want
to talk to you without...

I just got my finger
[bleep] twisted

to get away from...

(Brandi) Okay, stop it.

- Stop it.
- Here's the thing.

(Kim)
She's my sister,
and she's my best friend,

and they love me both.

- What happened?
- I don't know.

You told her something
about the [bleep] car.

(Kyle)
I said, "What happened in
the car on the way over here?"

I don't know!
Why did you tell her?

(Kyle)
Kim, Kim,
hold on, hold on.

(Lisa R)
I said you weren't
feeling well.

I rode in the car with Kim
on the way out to Malibu.

Nuts-o.

Like cuckoo bird
for Cocoa Puffs.

Don't [bleep] feel
sorry for me, bitch.

- Okay.
- And I like it.

Like, out of her [bleep] mind.

(Brandi) Walk away, walk away.

(Kyle)
Please quit
getting involved.

[all shouting]

- Stop it, stop it.
- Brandi.

[bleep] get your hand off me.

Are you kidding? Who does that?

- Who does that?
- Brandi, Brandi, Brandi.

(Brandi)
You want to [bleep]
see ghetto?

I don't play this game.
I'm not doing this.

- Bring it, bitch.
- I am not...

Really, I know how much
you've been there for her,

and that's zero.

I talk to her every [bleep] day.

[all talking at once]

(Brandi)
You're [bleep] not
even there for her at all.

Kim has her ex husband
dying in front of her eyes,

planning a wedding for Brooke,

and she's got the other kids
as well leaving for college.

She's just got too much
on her plate.

How is that all going
with Monty and everything?

We have our good days.
We have bad days.

I hope that you know you can
lean on me whenever you need it.

For the past six months,
I've been the one

that's been there for Kim,

and truthfully, Kyle hasn't.

(Kyle)
She has no idea
of our history.

(Lisa R)
I'll ride home
with Kyle.

Let me go get my bag.

(Kyle)
This is what Brandi thrives on,
trying to hurt people,

and she's trying to hurt me,
and it's working.

Brandi, you can't
do that to my sister.

She did this to me.

I know, but, wait...
That's my sister.

- Oh, wow, okay.
- Kyle.

Where's your sister at, like,
2:00 in the morning?

- I know.
- Really?

(Brandi)
I definitely feel like
Kyle is jealous

of the fact
that I've been there for Kim,

but at the same time,
she doesn't want the job.

So what, when everyone's around
and watching things go down,

all of a sudden,
you need to be the good sister?

But when no one's watching...

- Hi, darling.
- Hi, lovely.

(Kim)
Should we go over
and apologize?

- Are you kidding?
- She did that?

Look at this. It's swelling now.

I'm gonna [bleep] kill her.

- Oh, shut up.
- You are not.

How about a little Neosporin?

Get a grip. I'm going over here.

(Eileen)
Kim and Brandi have
a very codependent relationship

where they seem
to be needing each other

in ways that might not
necessarily be good.

- Good-bye.
- Bye.

- Thank you for having us.
- Yeah.

I'll see you next week.

(Kim)
I feel like I should ride
with my sister.

- But I love you.
- All right.

You guys go together.
I'll go on my own.

Bye, guys.

(Kim) Is Kyle okay?

Except for the gash
in her arm because of Brandi.

She gashed me.

She might need stitches.
Other than that, she's fine.

There's too much drinking
that goes on.

I mean, I know
your sister's a sober person,

but she did not seem sober to me

in some way, shape, or form.

(Lisa R)
I know what Kyle's
going through

because I saw Harry watch
both of his brothers drop dead

of alcoholism
within six months of each other,

and unless they want help,
unless anyone wants help,

you can't help them.

(Lisa R)
Did you think something
was going on with her?

I really don't know.
I mean, I don't know.

I mean, my sister...

She seemed upset, clearly,

and I really couldn't figure out
what was going on.

(Lisa R)
I think it's really tough
for Kyle.

I think it's a...

I think it's something
that is way touchy

and way deep.

Way deep.

(Kim) Tell me what to do.

Bunch of [bleep] drama queens

is all I can say.

- Sorry.
- No, it's true.

(Brandi) Eileen's like,

"I want to go home
with my baby and my son."

- Let's go.
- Okay, yeah.

Yeah, we need to go, Brandi.

(Brandi)
Thank you for having me.
I'm so sorry.

- It's okay.
- Brandi, we're leaving.

Okay, bye, you guys.

You're not gonna kill anybody
on the way home, right?

No, but, like, your sister...

Ah, Brandi!

There is addiction going on,

and no one is willing
to talk about it.

Well, you look amazing,

other than the fact that
your eyelash is falling off.

- You want to take it off?
- Oh, yeah, just take it.

- I am.
- Oh, yeah.

- Take this one too, will you?
- Yeah, okay.

Take that one too.

(Lisa R)
You know, I like Brandi,
but she's a drunk.

She needs rehab.

Brandi needs
to put herself into rehab.

Listen, you're perfection.
I love you.

You're not making sense tonight

because you're going through
everything that's in your house,

with Monty and everything.

- I'm not making sense?
- No, you weren't earlier.

When you first got there,
you were like,

"Ah, da-da-da-da."

It was not...

That's really
what Lisa said in the car.

(Lisa R)
There's alcoholism
raging like crazy,

and we're having
to deal with it.

I mean, that would not
have happened tonight, Kyle,

if people were not drinking
or on something.

I'm sorry.

What I see in Brandi is pain,

and I think the alcohol
is a good way for her

to cover her pain.

Women don't behave like that

unless they are inebriated
or something else is going on.

(Brandi)
I'm so sorry that
I fought with Kyle tonight.

- I just felt like...
- What was that over anyway?

It was about you.

She went out to make sure
you were okay,

but she didn't understand
that you and I were so close.

- I don't think she realizes...
- She does.

[chuckles]

Love you.

(Eileen) Coming up...

What do you think
Brandi's trying to do?

- She's just... Who knows?
- She's toxic.

(Eileen)
This is a fricking nightmare.

- Honey.
- Yeah.

Give me something.
I don't care what it is.

It's like the party from Hell.

It was horrible.

Kim and Kyle are fighting.

Brandi's in the middle
of it somehow.

I honestly do not know what
to make of some of these women.

It's very, very strange,
the whole thing.

- I know.
- It was weird.

How could it escalate
to something so ugly?

There was a bra on my driveway.

You know what you've been
through with me and my sisters.

- Yeah.
- Okay, we fight.

It's the worst fighting
in the world between sisters.

What could possibly...
What are they complaining about?

What's the deal? Makes no sense.

Brandi said they're
jealous of each other.

And you know, the whole dynamic
between sisters is horrible.

It's, like, a horrible thing,

and yet it's the most
wonderful thing in the world.

Seeing Kim and Kyle
fight like that is really sad.

I understand that siblings
can push your buttons.

I've definitely gotten
in little things like that

with my sisters over the years,

but we're talking
30, 40 years ago.

I'm not talking
as grown-ass women

in our 40s and 50s.

Family is the most
important thing,

and for Brandi to try
to get in the middle of that

is just totally not cool.

She's toxic.

What do you think
Brandi's trying to do?

She's just... I don't know what
the heck she's trying to do.

Who knows? I don't know.

It seems like she's always
wanting somebody to be

on her team
or to be on her side,

or she's very needy, or...
I don't get it.

At this point, I'm not sure
who is starting all this drama,

but I have a pretty good idea
of who's keeping it going,

and that's Brandi.

I don't get her.

Can't we all just get along?

Simple little poker game.

[device beeps]

(Bella) Hello.

Why are you...
How do I get you not sideways?

I'm so... Okay, why... why...

Why is it turning? What do I do?

(Bella)
You keep turning the phone.

No, now I have it straight,
but your face is sideways.

What do I do? Okay, why...

My picture keeps going around.

Why is that?

I don't believe in those games,

like if you want to call me,
you call me.

No, I text my daughters
the minute I wake up.

I want to know
when they're home at night,

and the rest of the day,
they can do whatever they want.

- Hi.
- Mommy.

Yeah, will you turn
your phone the other way?

(Bella)
You have to flip up
your screen.

You know how I showed you
how to do that?

Yeah, flip up. Okay, wait.

Hi, precious.

Thank god you're so... Oh.

Oh, you're teasing me, right?

That was mean. Okay, I did it.

Now I see you the right way.

Taking Bella out to college
was maybe more emotional

than when I took Gigi

just because the incident
that happened.

I just don't want you
to worry about me

being in New York alone.

What happened doesn't mean
that you're not a good mother,

but just that kids
make mistakes, you know?

- How are you doing?
- I love you.

I'm going
to an art show tonight.

- With who?
- Tallulah and Demi.

Oh, how fun.
You're sideways again.

Turn your camera, please.
Normal, there...

I like you better
this way, yeah.

This extraordinary human being
has been ready to fly

for a long time,

and I just got
to keep reminding myself

that she is going exactly
where Bella wants to go.

Text me tonight
when you're home in bed.

(Bella) I will.

And remember your curfew.
I love you.

Just got to throw that
in there, don't you?

I know you're getting impatient.
You're good boys.

(Ken) Hello?

(Lisa V) Darling, where are you?

I thought you were almost home.

(Ken) I'm here now. I'm coming.

I'm driving in now.

To have a few days away
with my family

has been really amazing
and really good for us all.

He's here.

At least I'm coming back
to my house full of dogs

I miss like crazy.

Rumpy! Oh, my god, look.

Rumpy's home. Bring him.

Rumpy! Welcome home.

[dogs barking]

Okay, nicely, okay?

You know Rumpy. Now, stop.

Stop, okay? You be nice.

I have, obviously, the Gigster.

I have Lollipop, Pikachu,

Giggy's father
joined us, Daddy-o.

I have pink dog,
and then we got Rumpy.

Would it be wrong
to have puppy six now?

Rumpy was at training camp
for three months.

(Lisa V) No, Rumpy, no. Rumpy.

Rumpy, no.

This dog is the naughtiest
four-legged thing on the planet.

It's hard enough training Ken
without adding

another bad dog to the mix.

Slow down.

I know you're excited.

Oh, Rumpy.

Oh, my!

[both chuckle]

(Lisa V) Oh, Rumpy.

Oh, you good boy.

- Oh, he looks so handsome.
- I know.

Doesn't he?

And he's nutless.

Oh, poor Rumpy,
where have they gone?

- Darling.
- Huh?

I've got a surprise for you.
He fell in love.

Allen, can you bring
his girlfriend in?

Sure. They fell in love.

(Lisa V) Oh, my god, she's huge.

What, is this the fattest
golden retriever I've ever seen?

I love the fact
that he's not a superficial guy.

There were 90 dogs
to choose from,

and he chose the oldest,
fattest lump in the school,

so that says a lot
about his character.

Oh, he's gonna miss her,
isn't he?

- He's gonna miss her.
- I'm thinking that's the idea.

Allen's giving her to you.

Rumpy could use a good friend.

We can't have another dog.

Have you not noticed?
One, two, three, four.

(Lisa V) Where's number five?

It's only one more.

[laughs]

Avery loves Rumpy.

She does not want
to be without him,

and Rumpy... the same.

(Lisa V)
You are beautiful,
aren't you?

Do you love Rumpy?

So Rumpy went to school,
he had his nuts chopped off,

and then he got married.

Normally it's the other way
around, isn't it?

Is she a healthy dog,
or has she got any...

(Allen)
She does have
a thyroid condition.

Her father's a champion.

- I've heard that before.
- No, yeah, I know.

Yeah, right.

(Lisa V)
Can we change
her name to Pumpy?

(Allen)
You can change it
to Pumpy.

I am keeping Avery because
I see this is a kind, sweet dog.

This bitch is easy to deal with,

unlike some of the others
in my life.

Rumpy and Pumpy, I love you.

[phone beeps, trills]

[trilling]

(Kyle) Hello?

- Kyle, hi, it's Lisa.
- Hi, how are you?

I'm good. How are you?

I'm just a little shocked still,
but I'm okay.

I'm okay.

Have you talked to Kim?

She texted me,
but I was on a hike.

And then I don't know
what's the deal with Brandi,

to be honest.

I don't know why she thought
she needed to get involved

between my sister and me.

I don't understand that either.

(Lisa R) Last night was ugly.

For me, seeing what Kyle's
going through

and knowing what it is like
to have families

that have addiction, you know,

there's just nothing
that Kyle can do.

Kyle will never be able to win.

Okay, well, you know,
I'm having this

jewelry party on Wednesday,

and I don't think
it's appropriate

for any of us
to get into it here.

I mean, I don't know
who's actually coming.

(Kyle)
I'm gonna come
and support you.

Obviously that's a cause
that's important to me as well,

but I will not bring
that energy to that event.

I would not do that.

I think Brandi owes me
an apology

for the things
that she said to me,

for grabbing my arm,

and for getting
in between my sister and me,

and until then,
I am just going to avoid Brandi

like the plague.

We're there
for an important event.

- We'll keep it about that.
- Okay.

I'm just gonna have fun.

[both laugh]

- Okay, we'll talk later.
- Okay, honey.

- Buh-bye.
- Bye.

[sighs]

Coming up...

- Kim...
- Yeah?

Is in the hospital.

- Morning, Mom.
- Good morning, my love.

How are you? Good morning.

How'd you sleep?

I slept good.

What time is the game?

I have to be there
at 11:00, so...

- Morning.
- Morning, how are you?

Fine.

(Blanca)
Need to give you
vitamins.

But why?

The game doesn't start
till 1:00.

'Cause there's, like,
warm-ups and stuff.

- For two hours?
- Yeah.

(Yolanda)
Now that my daughters
are gone,

all of a sudden,
it's just David and Anwar and I,

and it's a big change, for sure.

(Blanca) More grapefruit? No?

I'm good. Thanks.

It's so nasty.

(Yolanda)
We didn't live with David

until Anwar was 11,

so as a young child,

he took on the responsibility
of being the man in the house,

and he had this early-on sense
of, like,

"Okay, these are my girls,
and I'm taking care of it."

What's the plan for tonight?
What are you doing?

Want to have dinner with
your mommy, just you and me?

Yeah, I'll think about it.

(Yolanda)
I think it's been hard
for Anwar.

He's felt sadness
not having his sisters at home.

- What are you doing?
- I don't know yet.

Hanging out with friends
or having dinner with my mom.

Oh, I love you.
No, I understand.

It's Saturday night.

I'm sure you have
better things to do

than hanging out
with your mommy.

(Yolanda)
I can't wait for soccer
season to start, though.

I'm not sure about
this football sport.

Well, I love you.
Do you have water?

I'll take a small one.

Do you want to take some juice,

or is that not good?

Just water.
You want some snacks?

Some snacks? Some almonds?

- Love you.
- I love you.

- Good luck, baby.
- Bye, Blanca.

(Blanca) Bye, Anwar. Good luck.

- B?
- Yeah, come in, honey.

- Sit down.
- Are you okay?

Yeah.

Well, I got kind of freaked out

about your texts last night
and your calls.

I was having
a little panic last night.

How are you?

You were scaring me
with your "textes."

Texas is a state, honey.

I need a little guidance.

We're going to poker night.

I walk in, and I can tell
right off the bat

Kim is not okay.

I could just tell she was off.

I don't know what, though.
Not drunk.

Nothing like that,
but just not herself.

(Brandi)
Last night was a nightmare.

Kim, whether she wants
to talk about it or not,

fell off the wagon.

I was trying to protect her,

because I know that she's got
so much on her shoulders,

and, like, every time

any incident happened
over the summer,

I would call Kyle, and Kyle
was just like, "I'm done.

Like, I've done this
for too long."

Sometimes family
gets tired of it.

No, I know, and I think
that she's been through it

for a lot of years.

But I just don't want anything
bad to happen to Kim.

She's in a state of, like,
crazy emotional crisis right now

with everyone coming, going,
weddings, deaths.

It's a lot for anyone,
even if you're 100% healthy.

(Brandi)
Kim's sobriety
and being recently sober

makes her more fragile
to everything.

You have to put in time
to have strength,

and it's been
a short amount of time.

I just don't want the women
to get the wrong idea,

and I could tell
that they did last night.

I don't think that they know
the ins and outs

of everything that she's got
on her plate.

What if you were
to call Kyle and say,

"Look, Kyle"...

Kyle and I...
I need a minute from Kyle.

Yeah, no, and I get it.
I get that, but...

Her and I were both drinking,
and there was, like...

Tempers were flaring,
and... you know.

Have you talked to Kim today?

I feel like she needs
a moment, too,

to try to take in
what went down last night.

I'm still trying
to figure it out.

I don't 100% know.

Why does everything
[bleep] crazy

happen in Malibu for you?

I don't know.
I'm never going there again.

Malibu [bleep] sucks.

(Kyle) Sophia, I love you.

I've got to run down
and see aunt Kim.

(Mauricio) Hello.

Hi, honey. How are you?

I'm good, and you?

- I'm good.
- What's going on?

- You well?
- I'm good.

What's up? What are you doing?

I feel bad, 'cause
you just walked in the door.

I have to go. Kim...

- Yeah.
- Is in the hospital.

Why?

I-I don't really know
right now, to be honest, so...

Is she okay?

She was in a lot of pain,

and Monty took her
to Cedar Center.

- Have you talked to her?
- No.

I haven't had a chance to really
speak to her one on one.

So you don't know
how she's feeling.

- No.
- She's in a lot of pain.

- She's in a little pain.
- I don't know anything.

They just said that
she could have an ulcer,

but I don't know
if they saw an ulcer

or they're guessing
from her pain or her reaction.

I don't know.

(Kyle) Over the years,

I've seen my sister
go through a lot difficult times

and be under a lot of pressure.

I'm worried. I'm frustrated.

I don't know
what is going on with my sister.

She was not herself,

and I know she was
in a lot of pain, she said,

and I guess she took
something to, you know...

(Kim) I'm 100% in pain.

Before I left the house,
Monty gave me something

for the pain
that the doctor gave me.

And I took it, and that's it.

I don't think... this doesn't
sound like it's related

to anything to may
have occurred last night.

- Do you?
- No.

No, I don't... You know what?
I don't even know.

(Kyle)
Often, sibling relationships
are complicated,

but I think, with Kim and me,

there's a whole other dynamic

because of her sobriety

and my not knowing
how to handle it always.

I just... I feel like
she's under a lot of pressure

with Monty.

Well, how could she not be?

For sure.

I mean, we've gone
through it with our parents,

but I don't know, I just think
it's too much for her.

Hopefully the doctor
will be there,

and I can try
to get some answers.

But I have to get there
before visiting hours end.

- Well, you need to go.
- Yeah.

(Lisa R)
Hi, ladies,
how's it going?

Very well. How are you?

This table has been
a good table.

This was our head table
at our wedding.

(woman) Oh, my gosh.

So it's a really
good luck table, I would say.

Fantastic.

So let's hope we sell
lots of jewelry.

Yes, we will.

Lots of money
for breast cancer research.

- That's right.
- Awesome.

(Lisa R)
With parties,
I'm a basket case.

I want everyone to be happy.
I want everyone to like me.

If I throw a bad party,
I'm a bad person.

[laughs]

What is this?

Like, this is the ugliest...

What are we gonna do with that?

This, I don't...

Like, I hope somebody's
coming for this.

That's a problem.

I'm totally particular

and want it to be exactly
the way I want it.

- You see that lamp shade?
- Uh-huh.

- See the seam?
- Oh, I do.

We'll turn it around.

(Lisa R)
I have a huge control issue.

Okay? There, I said it.

I don't know why it bothers me
so much, but it does.

I want it to be perfect,
and there's no such thing.

That I do know.

This looks so good.
I'm so excited.

(Eileen) Hi, guys.

[swan honks]

Don't you get aggressive on me.

[swan honks]

- Hi.
- Hi.

Aren't you lovely? How are you?

- Sorry.
- Your swan was gonna get me.

Well, I told him to. He didn't?

Hanky Panky.

He is fabulous,
and this is amazing.

Well, you haven't even seen it.

You're very sweet. Come in.

We don't have to be
at Lisa Rinna's for a while.

- Want some tea?
- Yes.

- Follow me, darling.
- Okay.

(Lisa V) Sit here, darling.

- Is it too windy for you?
- I don't think so.

I can't concentrate.
It's too pretty.

(Eileen)
Lisa's home is so beautiful...
the view, the swans.

How can you not love
a house with swans?

And there are the swans
and, like, an orchard.

And there's the viewing room.

Thanks, Rocio.

And an office and a wine bar.

It's kind of very romantic.

Your swing.

You asking if I'm a swinger?

Well, you just kind
of leave it out there.

I have a swing
when I want a swinger.

That's good to know.

[knock at door]

[speaking indistinctly]

Hello? Hi.

(Yolanda) Hey. Hi.

Ah.

Oh, you look so pretty.

Oh, the cute purse... great.

How are you?

- You have so many dogs.
- I know.

(Kyle)
I'm almost ready.
I'm sorry.

(Yolanda)
And they're all so friendly.

What's going on?

Everything. A lot.

Like...

My sister's in the hospital
right now.

- What happened?
- Chloe, shh, shh, shh.

What happened?

Chloe, come up here.

- Well...
- She's in the hospital?

She's in the hospital.

She was doubled over in pain.

Yeah.

And ended up
in the emergency room.

(Lisa V)
How was the poker party?
Did it go well?

I wouldn't say that, no.

Like, it was just
really a strange evening.

What do you mean
it didn't go well?

There was something up with Kim.

She was a little out
of sorts from the get-go,

but I don't know her
well enough to know why

or what's going on,
do you understand?

(Kyle)
I think this thing
with Monty's really...

I know.

I've been wondering
about that for months.

With her daughter
getting married,

her other daughter moving out,

and then Monty...
I mean, nursing Monty every day

through what he's going through

is just so hard.

It's a lot.

It's a lot of pressure
for anybody.

I mean, it would be hard
for me, for us.

Sometimes even when
Kim's totally normal,

she often seems
a little bit off to me anyway.

- Do you know what I'm saying?
- I guess so.

I don't know her well enough
to make that judgment.

(Lisa V)
Kim's personality is a little
kind of wacka-doodle-doo

a little bit,

so sometimes it's hard
to really be in sync with her,

should we say.

And then all of a sudden,
Kim's leaving,

and it's only, like, 10:00.

It's only...
It hasn't been that long.

As she was leaving,
she, all of a sudden,

seemed to be upset with me,

and I went to go talk with her,

and Brandi put her arm up
and was like,

you know, like,
"Stay away from her."

Brandi blocked her,
and Kyle put her arm down

and then some jewelry
or something scratched her.

I don't know really know
'cause I did not see it.

(Kyle)
I was like, "Why the hell
are you not letting me

talk to my sister?"

I didn't understand that.

Were they drinking?

You know, Brandi had champagne.

Alcohol is such an ugly thing.

Most people say things
that are just mean and nasty.

Not everybody does.

Some people have a few drinks,
laugh, and have fun.

Yeah.

(Yolanda)
I mean, what adult women,

mothers of children,

would get
into some physical fight?

I mean, who does that?

So then I'm showing
people the house,

and, oh, Brandi says
the house is kind of scary

and like American Gothic.

And I don't know
if she's trying to be funny

or she thinks
it's just her thing.

She can say what she wants,
and it doesn't matter.

I don't know,
but it seems strange,

especially after she threw
a glass of wine in my face

the week before.

(Lisa V) Why am I not surprised

that I'm listening to this?

Brandi, at least be polite

if somebody invites you
into their home.

Well, I mean, I don't know
if this is something

that she just has with me
all of a sudden, or...

I don't really get it,

but I kind of want to know
what it's about,

'cause I'm not comfortable.

- Let's go.
- Okay.

- Anyway...
- Drama in Beverly Hills.

(Kyle) Coming up...

You're not allowed to get drunk.

I can do whatever
the [bleep] I want.

(Lisa V) Should we go upstairs

and just have a quick brush-up?

- We'll do that in the car.
- Are you sure?

Yeah, I just want
to spy on your closet.

Oh, you can. It's a good one.

(Eileen) Pretty.
Oh, my god, it's blinding.

I'm speechless.

- Are you?
- Yes.

(Eileen)
You don't have three boys
running around, do you?

I've had that house
where I had lots of kids...

- Shut up.
- I know.

This isn't that house anymore.

(Eileen) Oh, my god.

Lisa Vanderpump's closet
is off the hook,

with, like, altars to purses.

[laughs]

Wow.

Do you just walk
around naked a lot

with your high heels on?

- Just for the hell of it.
- Of course, yeah.

Exactly.

Can't you imagine me doing that?

(Lisa V)
Finally, somebody
who gets me.

Of course I walk around naked
in heels.

Feels like I should
give you knucks now.

- What's knucks?
- This is knucks.

- Yeah.
- Okay, I'll take it.

Everybody knows this.

Don't they?

[laughs]

- Come on.
- Let's go then.

Okay.

(Lisa R)
I'm ready to be accessorized.

I can sell ice to an Eskimo,
so trust me,

I will help sell this jewelry...

Load me up.
I'll sell your [bleep] for you.

'Cause these ladies
have some cash.

Come on, I want them
to cough it up.

If you put it on me,
it will sell.

- How are you?
- Hello, hello, welcome.

- How's it going?
- Welcome.

Good, welcome. Nice to see you.

You're so cute.

Look at you in your little
Western wear.

I have Back to School
night tonight,

Trying to be, like,
proper for the teachers.

Is this proper for the teachers?

It's as good as it gets.

Wow.

It's all they're getting.

You imagine if I showed up
at my school like that?

- But I go to public.
- Oh, see, exactly.

Totally different. I can do it.

(Yolanda) Wow, what a view.

(Lisa R) It goes all together,

and I think you can... Hi!

- Hi.
- Hello.

What a beautiful home.
The view's amazing.

My god, I love
that gorgeous view.

(Lisa R) Hi, gorgeous.

- How are you?
- Hello.

- How are you?
- I'm good.

Ooh, is this the top?

- Yes!
- Oh, it's beautiful.

(Yolanda)
I love it.
Oh, that's cute.

Pretty, right?

- Hey, B.
- Hi, Mami.

(both) How are you?

(Yolanda) Little troublemaker.

(Kyle)
Do I want to see Brandi today?

Absolutely not.

I have certainly not moved on,
so I know that she has not,

and I have no intention of it.

- My goodness.
- Huh?

(Yolanda) I rode with Kyle.

Oh, what'd she tell you?

Well, I heard it was,
like, a whole big deal.

(Brandi)
I haven't spoken to Kyle
since poker night

because I just feel like,
kind of, time heals some wounds.

It's just not the time
to try to make up

after this big heated argument.

(Lisa R) Hi!

Group hug.

Thank you so much for coming.

I was just... I love you.

- Thank you so much...
- You look gorgeous.

Thank you.

This is all from here.

It's cute, isn't it?

This 100% goes
to breast cancer research,

so you want to buy that.

- Hi.
- Hello, girl!

(Lisa V) Hello, how are you?

[speaking indistinctly]

(Lisa R) I missed you.

- How are you?
- How are you?

Welcome back.

- Hi there, how are you?
- I'm good, how are you?

(Lisa V)
I heard that Kim's
in the hospital.

(Lisa R)
Wait, wait.
What happened?

(Kyle) Oh, I don't know.

Right now, they're doing
all these tests.

And I went there,
waited an hour and a half today,

and she never came back
to the room.

Her kids and I were all waiting,

and they were sending her down
for more and more and more.

I feel like
I'm in a tough situation,

and everybody wants to know,
you know,

"What happened with your sister?
Is everything okay?"

I don't have that answer
right now.

Is it her disc was...

(Lisa R)
I'm glad to hear
that she's in the hospital.

- Yeah.
- Actually.

Because she was
really not well in that car.

(Yolanda)
What happened Friday night?

Why did you guys
all get in a fight?

Kim was just off.
She wasn't herself.

I went over to talk to Kim.

Kyle was like,
"This is my sister,"

and she grabbed my hand,
and when she grabbed my hand,

something scratched me,
and I just got pissed.

Were you drinking?

Of course I was drinking.

It was a party.

I'm a grown-up.
I'm allowed to have drinks.

But you're not allowed
to get drunk.

- You're on probation.
- You know what?

I can do whatever
the [bleep] I want.

(Brandi) I'm an adult.

I will take care of me,
and she can worry about her.

And I don't want
this lecture right now.

I don't, and I wasn't drunk.

I'm not giving you a lecture.
I'm your friend.

Yeah, but this isn't about me.
This is about Kim.

(Yolanda)
If she thinks
I'm mothering her,

then maybe she should start
behaving like an adult,

and now there's a child.

It has nothing to do
with me and my drinking.

It had to do with Kim
not being well.

Kim needs a team around her,
professional team.

She's everyone's
everything right now.

She's throwing weddings,
taking care of Monty.

Everyone's leaning on Kim.

Like, she doesn't
have anyone to lean on.

(Kyle)
Remember we talked about
the gay mixer?

- I'm doing it.
- No, you're not.

I'm gonna send you the invite.

- You're doing it?
- Yeah.

We're having a gay mixer.

Yeah, I said on the invite,
"Bring your tops and bottoms,

and I don't mean your bikini."

You did not.

[laughs]

So not funny.

[laughs]

We do, like, bikini tops?

(Lisa R) Am I dumb?

What does that mean?

"Bring your tops
and bottoms and"...

Oh, naked. No.

I don't know. Am I so dumb?

[laughs]

(Eileen)
Just use
your imagination.

- Well, listen...
- No.

Sorry, gays. I'm so sorry.

I really let you down.

I let my gays down.

Oh, my god, gays,
will you ever forgive me?

I let you down.

Denise.

How many dogs
do you have right now?

[all talking at once]

I foster a lot of them.

(Lisa V)
Oh, I like you more.
I don't even know you.

Were you married
to Charlie Sheen?

- I was.
- Okay.

So the only thing
I have in common with him...

Well, because I'm used to the...

I know what you have in common.

- Is our car...
- Your car went off the cliff.

(Lisa V) My Bentley was stolen

along with Charlie Sheen's,

and they were both driven
off the cliff,

and I'm happy to say
that is the only thing

I have in common
with Charlie Sheen.

(Lisa R)
You guys have much more
in common than I realized.

[indistinct conversation]

(Kyle)
Janna, should I do this
in yellow gold or rose gold?

Rose? Okay.

(Eileen) Where's Brandi?

Brandi and Yolanda
I saw walk that way.

I want to just talk
to her for a second.

Come. I'll show you where.

I'm afraid... I don't think she's
strong enough to handle it.

Not right now, like...

(Eileen) You guys speaking?

- Hi, how are you?
- Hi, how are you?

- Oh, what a pretty color.
- Thank you.

How are you?

(Yolanda)
Everything is good:
stress, tired, exhausted.

- Hi.
- Time to catch up.

Good. Okay, good.

- Am I interrupting?
- No.

(Yolanda)
But, you know,
if you guys want to talk...

Doesn't matter. Doesn't matter.

You can stay. It's fine with me.

Yeah, you know what?

It's just that something's been
kind of bugging me since Friday.

I know I'm just kind
of vomiting this out,

but I just want to get it
out in the open,

'cause I don't like stuff
that's just sitting there.

You were, like, telling me
that my house was kind of scary

and that it was American Gothic,

and it's, like, our family home.

Right.

And I was like... I didn't let...

- I said nothing about it.
- Okay.

You know, but then it...
There was a buildup.

There was a lot of cussing.

I'm like, "My son's upstairs,"

and you kept... it kind
of started feeling

a little disrespectful.

If she thinks [bleep] saying
the "[bleep]"

is [bleep] provocative,

then she needs to get out
a little more.

It's a [bleep] word.

And if you're having
a late-night party at your house

where you're serving drinks
and playing poker,

get a [bleep] nanny
to take your kid out.

I'm just not okay with it,

and I just want
to talk about it,

and I don't know
if there's something

that you're feeling towards me

that makes you
antagonistic, or...

Gosh, no, I like you.

I apologize if I offended you.

Oh, goody, another lecture.

These ladies need to [bleep]
lighten up a little.

I'm not gonna, like, belabor it,

and I'm not gonna torture you.

Oh, it's fine.

It's just really
just kind of just saying

what I was feeling.

I don't want it to be like
a Mean Girl thing.

- You know what I mean?
- Oh, okay.

Yeah, no,
that's not who I am at all.

- You're not a mean girl?
- No, I'm not.

So if you... if you're
perceiving me that way,

I apologize.

It's not me at all.

(Eileen)
Brandi's apology
does not sound sincere at all.

What is that behavior
if it's not mean?

It's hurtful.
It hurts people's feelings.

She's got mean girl
written all over her.

I don't care what she says.

It just keeps coming at me.
I just got here.

I'm going Back to School
night, so...

Oh, what keeps coming at you?

Oh, just things.

- It's fine.
- Okay, well...

Well, I apologize.

All right, and you know what?
If in the moment...

'Cause I should've said
something in the moment

instead of just, you know,
letting it fester and bug me.

So I'll just say,
"Hey, you know what?

That's BS."

I mean, always just
tell me whatever.

Okay, all right.

Well, I'll let you go,

'cause you have to go
to Back to School.

Yeah, I'm gonna go
get some more jewelry,

and then I'm gonna run.

Okay.

It seems that Brandi
is addicted to chaos,

and it's this negative energy
that creates bad feeling,

and you just want
to stay away from it.

What are you doing after this?

Well, we can go for a drink.

(Lisa V)
Maybe go to Villa Blanca.

- Are you okay?
- Yeah.

Just have anxiety right now,

and you know me
when I get anxiety.

Is there anything
I have to know now?

[mumbling]

Nothing you need to know now,

but I'll tell you later.

(woman)
On the dining room table,
as you leave,

there are some little gift bags.

Oh, perfect. Thank you so much.

- Thank you so much.
- All right, thanks.

[speaking indistinctly]

I have to go.
My first thing is 7:00.

I don't want to mend things
with Brandi right now

because I've seen her behavior
too many times.

I'm not a fool.

- Bye, baby.
- Bye.

Thanks for having me.

I'm gonna act
like you're invisible

and a little ghost
floating through the party.

(Lisa R) Everybody, hi, hi, hi.

Just want to thank you all
so much for coming today.

And Noreen Fraser is here.

I wanted to introduce you,
if you want to come up.

It's her foundation
that we're supporting today.

We have to turn cancer
into a disease

that you could live with
and not die from.

Absolutely.

- We have to.
- That's right.

- Yes!
- All right.

Yay, thank you so much.

(Lisa R) Coming up...

I could never trust her again.

I don't want to make
an effort anymore.

Same with me.

Once bitten,
very, very bloody shy.

- Hi.
- Hello, hi, how are you?

- We're gonna have a drink.
- Okay.

We'll be over there. Okay, good.

Two glasses of rose.
I'll have ice in one, please.

(Woman) I'll be right back.

So...

What's the state of play
with you and Brandi now?

I mean, of course
I do get over things,

but I also feel like,
when it comes right down to it,

I don't trust her now.

And to be honest, I think
that she owes me an apology,

but clearly, she must think
that she wasn't wrong,

because I haven't heard
one thing from her.

(Kyle)
I gave Brandi many chances,
and I had high hopes,

and I was only let down.

I don't want to put myself
in the position

to be hurt by Brandi
emotionally or physically.

Listen, it'll all blow over.

And with Brandi,
you're gonna see her again,

and again and again and again,

and she'll say...

And I'll be polite.
I'll be fine.

- I'll just...
- But it's changed the dynamic.

That's the same with me.

And I don't want to make
an effort anymore.

Same with me,
'cause I went to her

and I felt I was
a really good friend to her,

really supported her.

Ken really took her
under our wing.

I could never trust her again.

I'm happy to be, you know,

in the same
social circle as her,

and I think she's
lucky to have that.

I really do.

(Lisa V)
I think Brandi's always trying

to be the center of attention.

Brandi's not happy unless
she's provoking a situation.

Maybe it makes her feel
more important,

like she really is.

I don't know.

For me, once bitten,
very, very bloody shy.

So you make your own decision.

I mean, I don't have
the history that you guys have,

you know?

(Kyle)
It's not that I can't forgive
Brandi for what just happened.

I don't want to.

No, I'm a big girl.
I can make my own decisions.

I don't emotionally invest
in somebody

that can betray you like that

and actually say,
"I will destroy you."

I think there's
an angry person there.

I really do.

I just hope Kim doesn't
get hurt, really.

(Lisa R)
Next time on The Real Housewives
of Beverly Hills...

I don't remember everything.

Why?

I know that you're fine,
you're sober,

but I knew clearly
something was wrong.

At the time, I didn't
know what it was,

so I was just trying
to keep you close.

I was trying to protect you
from your sister.

- Put in your name.
- What is it?

What, you mean the name
before I got you?

Yeah, my last name.

I'm not gonna tell you that.

(Lisa V)
Suddenly I have warning bells

that maybe he wants
to find the family.

There's a drought
in West Hollywood.

There's a lack of tops.

I love a party.

- Let's just go home right now.
- Exactly.

(Lisa R)
Oh, my god, this is
really awkward.

This is really weird.

Are you out
of your [bleep] mind?

How dare you have the balls
to walk in here uninvited.

I swear to god,
I'll knock your teeth out.

Get the [bleep] out of my face.

(Kyle) You're not wanted.

Excuse me. Neither are you.

- Good-bye.
- Ask your husband.

This is my [bleep]...

You're gonna let this person
come between us?

I came here tonight.

[bleep] you.

(Eileen)
To learn more
about the housewives,