The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (2010–…): Season 2, Episode 11 - Tempest in a Tea Party - full transcript

- PREVIOUSLY ON THE REAL
HOUSEWIVES OF BEVERLY HILLS...

- I AM SO MAD AT LISA RIGHT NOW.

SHE IS SAYING AROUND TOWN
THAT I DON'T HAVE ANY FRIENDS.

- YOU NEED TO STAND UP
AND SPEAK UP FOR YOURSELF.

I DON'T THINK IT'LL BE
A BIG BLOWUP.

- I'M MOVING.

NOW IS PROBABLY THE BEST TIME

TO INTRODUCE HER TO KEN.

JUST SAY HI.

COME ON.

- IF YOU'RE IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE
AND WANT TO MOVE IN WITH THEM,



YOU'RE GOING TO BE HAPPY
AND PROUD

TO SHARE THAT WITH EVERYONE.

WHY HAS SHE BEEN HIDING THIS
FROM ME?

- COME ON, LITTLE SISTER.

BE A BIG GIRL.

[upbeat music]

- LIFE IN BEVERLY HILLS
IS A GAME,

AND I MAKE THE RULES.

- I'M NOT THE RICHEST GIRL
IN BEVERLY HILLS,

BUT I AM THE LUCKIEST.

- PEOPLE TRY TO FIGURE ME OUT,
BUT I'M ONE OF A KIND.

- I'VE FINALLY FOUND MY VOICE,
AND I'M NOT AFRAID TO USE IT.

- HAVING IT ALL IS EASY,

IF YOU'RE WILLING TO WORK
FOR IT.



- DIAMONDS AREN'T
A GIRL'S BEST FRIEND.

FREEDOM IS.

- JUST SAY HI.

COME ON.

- I LOOK LIKE A NUT.
- NO, YOU DON'T.

BE A BIG GIRL.

COME ON, LITTLE SISTER.
BE A BIG GIRL.

HEY, GUYS! - HEY.

- HELLO.
- HI, THERE.

- HOW ARE YOU?

- OKAY. HOW ARE YOU?
- HI, SAVANNAH.

YEAH, HOW ARE YOU?
NICE TO SEE YOU.

- NICE TO MEET YOU.

- THAT'S BETO.

- BETO'S MY RIGHT-HAND MAN.
- I'M THE HELPER.

- SO WHEN ARE YOU
OFFICIALLY OUT OF HERE?

- WELL, WE THOUGHT MONDAY,
BUT WE'RE MOVING A LITTLE SLOWER

'CAUSE THE PIECES ARE SO HEAVY.

- WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO
WITH ALL YOUR PIECES?

- WELL, A LOT OF IT'S...
- IT'S ALREADY...

- AT HIS HOUSE, AND A LOT
OF IT'S IN STORAGE.

[laughing]
AND THESE PIECES ARE SO HEAVY

THAT THE GUY'S LIKE,

"WE NEED MORE GUYS."

- OH, MY GOD.
YOU HAVE A WEDDING BAND?

- IT'S NOT A WEDDING BAND.

IT'S LIKE A PROMISE BAND.
- SHE GAVE IT TO ME.

- NO, WE DIDN'T GET MARRIED.
- NO.

- OKAY.
- WE'RE NOT ENGAGED OR ANYTHING.

- SHE GAVE ME IT.
- OH, GOT IT.

- LOOKS LIKE THAT, THOUGH.

WOULDN'T YOU CALL IT
A TRUST BAND?

- IT'S PRETTY MUCH
A WEDDING BAND.

I LOVE DOGS,

BUT I'M SO ALLERGIC
TO LONG-HAIRED DOGS.

- I USUALLY HAVE HER SHAVED.
- I HAVE TO GO WASH MY HANDS

BEFORE I, UM, TOUCH MY FACE.

EXCUSE ME ONE MINUTE.

- THAT WAS HARD.

- I THINK IT WENT WELL.

- I DON'T LIKE TO SEE HER CRY.

- OH, COME ON, BABY.

- I WANT MY SISTER TO BE HAPPY.

I WANT MY SISTER TO HAVE IT ALL.

I JUST DON'T FEEL THAT THIS
IS THE RIGHT PERSON FOR HER.

KIM'S KIDS HAVE TOLD ME

THAT THEY THINK KEN
IS VERY CONTROLLING.

I KNOW KEN WANTS ME TO LIKE HIM,

BUT THIS INFORMATION
ISN'T HELPING ME.

YOU KNOW THIS IS SUPPOSED
TO BE YOU AND ME?

- WHAT? LET ME SEE.

THAT PAINTING?
WHAT COLOR IS OUR HAIR?

- WELL, MOM HAD A HARD TIME
MAKING THE BLONDE.

- [laughs] I DIDN'T KNOW THAT.

- DO GIRLS WITH LONG HAIR...

- I'M GOING TO ADD IN
SOME BLONDE THERE.

- IT'S UNDERSTANDABLE THAT KIM
WOULD HAVE KEPT THIS FROM ME,

KNOWING THAT SHE KNOWS ME
SO WELL

AND SHE KNOWS HOW I WOULD REACT.

I KNOW WHY
SHE KEPT THIS FROM ME,

JUST LIKE SHE KNOWS
WHY I'M CRYING.

WELL, I'M GOING TO LET YOU,
UH...

GET BACK TO KEN.

BYE. NICE MEETING YOU.

BYE-BYE. TAKE CARE. - TAKE CARE.

- YEAH,
I'M GOING TO TAKE MY KIDS

OUT TO AN EARLY DINNER.
TAKE CARE.

- TAKE CARE. BYE.

- OKAY.
- I WANTED KYLE TO KNOW

THAT THIS IS THE FIRST TIME...

I THINK IN MY WHOLE LIFE

THAT I'VE EVER DONE ANYTHING
BECAUSE I WANTED TO.

I THOUGHT IT THROUGH,
AND THIS IS WHAT I WANTED TO DO.

- OKAY, WELL, I LOVE YOU.

- OKAY.

- YOU FEEL SO SMALL AND TINY
AND LITTLE AND CHILDLIKE.

- [laughs]
- I LOVE YOU.

I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER.
- LOVE YOU, TOO.

[engine turning]

DRIVE CAREFULLY. - I WILL.

MAYBE I'M WRONG,

AND MAYBE SHE WILL BE OKAY
WITH THIS PERSON.

AND I HOPE TO GOD I'M WRONG.

I REALLY HOPE TO GOD I'M WRONG.

- I THINK THAT WENT GOOD,
DON'T YOU?

[smooches] - SO STRESSFUL.

- I GOT YOU.

RIGHT? - MM-HMM.

- NO WORRIES.

- OH. ALL RIGHT.
- ALL RIGHT.

- OH.

- ALL I KNOW IS I'M STARVING.

- HI, HOW YOU DOING?
- HOW ARE YOU?

- GOOD TO SEE YOU.

OH, THIS IS BEAUTIFUL. MY GOSH.

- I KNOW IT'S A SPECIAL NIGHT
FOR YOU GUYS,

SO IT'S A PRIVATE ROOM.

- THANK YOU.
- THAT'S VERY, VERY NICE.

- IT'S NICE OF YOU. THANK YOU.

- WHY DON'T YOU JUST BRING
SOME APPETIZERS?

- I'M MORE
ON THE VEGETARIAN SIDE.

- AND I'M NOT.

- CHEERS.
- CHEERS.

- HAPPY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY,
MY BABY.

[chuckles]

- [laughs, coughs]

- THIS IS OUR ORIGINAL PLATTER
FOR THE FAMILY.

START OFF WITH, UM...
CRAB PUFF...

THE MOST FAMOUS APPETIZER
ON THE PLATTER...

WITH VIETNAMESE-HERB
CREAM CHEESE,

PEANUT MUSTARD.

THAT'S A FILET MIGNON BEEF SATAY

WITH GINGER,
LEMONGRASS DRESSING,

SO NO SAUCE WITH THAT.
- WONDERFUL.

- THAT'S
A STEAMED CHICKEN DUMPLING

WITH A TAMARIND-GINGER SOY.

AND THAT'S ORIGINAL APPETIZER
FOR THE FAMILY...

- THANK YOU.
- COCONUT PRAWN,

WITH MAMA'S SPECIAL SAUCE.

- YOU WANT TO TAKE A LOOK?
WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO ORDER?

I KNOW WHAT I'M GOING TO HAVE.
- JUST DON'T RETURN ANYTHING.

- I'M NOT GOING TO RETURN
ANYTHING... THE FOOD'S GREAT HERE.

- I KNOW. BUT YOU JUST... OUT
OF HABIT YOU LIKE TO DO THAT.

- NO, THAT'S YOU.
- THAT'S NOT ME.

LET'S NOT START.

- [laughs]
- GOD.

- WHICH ONE YOU HAVE THE EYE ON?
- THEY HAVE CRAB OUT OF A SHELL.

- WHY DON'T YOU HAVE THAT?
- I'LL ORDER WHAT I WANT.

- SHE SHOULD HAVE CRAB
IS WHAT SHE REALLY SHOULD HAVE,

'CAUSE I KNOW SHE LIKES CRAB.
- NO, I KNOW WHAT I WANT.

- I'LL TELL YOU WHAT,
SINCE IT'S MY BIRTHDAY,

WHY DON'T YOU LET ME
ORDER FOR YOU?

- THAT'S A SCARY THOUGHT.

- YOU KNOW WHAT?

NO, BECAUSE I WOULD ORDER
YOU CRAB, 'CAUSE YOU LIKE CRAB.

- CAN I JUST GET
WHAT I WOULD LIKE TO ORDER?

- GO AHEAD AND ORDER SOMETHING
SMALL AND NOTHING AGAIN.

- YOU KNOW, SOMETIMES HE JUST...

- I'M GOING TO HAVE
THE TIGER PRAWNS.

- TIGER PRAWNS, YES, SIR.

- MAY I ASK YOU A QUESTION?
BETWEEN THAT...

BETWEEN ALL THESE...
BETWEEN THE CRAB,

THE TIGER PRAWNS,
AND THE MAINE LOBSTER,

WHAT DO YOU RECOMMEND?

- FOR YOU, I WOULD SAY
YOU WOULD LIKE THE TIGER PRAWNS,

MR. PAUL. - ALL RIGHT.

- YES, SIR.
- ARE YOU FINISHED?

- THAT WAS EASY.

- MARRIAGE... IT'S WORK.
YOU HAVE TO HOLD YOUR TONGUE.

HARD AT TIMES.
EASIER SAID THAN DONE.

RESPECT THE OTHER PERSON.
MARRIAGE IS DIFFICULT.

- 2006, GOOD OLD JORDAN.

MAN, THAT'S GREAT. - THANK YOU.

- YEAH, THAT'S FANTASTIC.
THANK YOU.

- I'M A LITTLE CONCERNED
ABOUT TAYLOR.

A LITTLE CONCERNED...
VERY CONCERNED.

- THERAPY MADE HER WORSE?

- I DON'T KNOW.

I DON'T KNOW
WHAT'S GOING ON WITH HER.

YOU'LL SAY "HI" TO HER,

AND SHE'LL PRACTICALLY BREAK
DOWN CRYING.

IT IS NONSTOP.

ACCORDING TO TAYLOR,
THEIR RELATIONSHIP HAS GOTTEN

TO THE POINT
WHERE IT'S VERY PHYSICAL.

- HE DOESN'T CHEAT ON ME.

- OTHER THINGS COULD BE WORSE.

- HAS SOMEBODY RAISED
A HAND TO YOU,

FOR EXAMPLE?
- ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

- EXACTLY.
HOW LONG WOULD WE BE THERE?

- IS IT TRUE?

- I DON'T KNOW,
BECAUSE I'VE NEVER...

WITNESSED IT.
- I DON'T KNOW IF IT'S TRUE.

- IT HAS BEEN VERY DIFFICULT
FOR ME TO LIKE RUSSELL,

CONSIDERING WHAT TAYLOR
HAS TOLD ME ABOUT HER SITUATION.

- HIS PERSONALITY DOESN'T SEEM
LIKE THAT, THOUGH.

HE SEEMS SO MELLOW.
- I ONLY KNOW WHAT SHE TELLS ME.

SHE GETS EMOTIONALLY SO...

UH, DISTRAUGHT
OVER WHAT HE'S DONE.

AND THEN 15 MINUTES LATER,

THE NEXT DAY,
IT'S LIKE NOTHING HAPPENED...

VERY CONFUSING.

AS HER FRIEND...

I WANT TO BE THERE FOR HER.

BUT THE STORIES ARE SO SEVERE...

THAT IT'S VERY DIFFICULT
FOR ME TO UNDERSTAND

WHY SHE GOES BACK
TO A SITUATION LIKE THAT.

- I GOT TO TELL YOU,
I DON'T KNOW IF I BELIEVE THIS.

COME ON.

- I HAVE NEVER SEEN IT.

SO I DON'T LIKE
TO JUDGE PEOPLE UNLESS I...

SEE THAT FOR MYSELF.

I DON'T KNOW.

- OH!
- OH, WOW!

- HAPPY BIRTH...
OH, MY GOD, LOOK AT THAT.

DO I BLOW THAT OUT?
- OH, THAT IS A...

- I CAN'T BLOW THAT OUT.
- DON'T YOU DARE!

YOU'LL SET MY HAIR ON FIRE.
- THAT WHOLE THING'LL GO...

AW. - THERE YOU GO.

- MAKE A WISH.

HURRY, HURRY, HURRY,
BEFORE IT GOES OUT.

THAT'S BEAUTIFUL!
- HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

- THANK YOU, MY FRIEND.
- THANK YOU, SIR.

- WHY DON'T YOU,
YOU KNOW, SAY SOMETHING...

SOME LOVELY WORDS TO ME?

- I LOVE YOU.
- OH, I LOVE YOU, TOO.

- THE BEST HUSBAND IN THE WORLD.
- I LOVE YOU, BABY.

BABY!

GREAT WINE.

- COMING UP...

- ARE YOU
AT TAYLOR'S THING TODAY?

THE LUNCHEON?

- I HAVE NO IDEA.

I OBVIOUSLY
WASN'T TOLD ABOUT IT.

- WHERE IS BLUEBERRY HIDING?

OH, NO,
I CAN'T FIND BLUEBERRY ANYWHERE.

- HELLO!
- HONEY.

- HONEY, I'M HOME!

THE THEATER ROOM IS PAID FOR.

[both laughing]

- YOU CLOSED THE DEAL?

- WE GOT ONE.

- OH, SO THEIR...
- MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.

- I HAVE SO MANY THINGS
TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT.

- NOW WHAT? [both laughing]

- I HAVE SO MUCH ANXIETY.

- KIM'S MOVING IN WITH KEN...

THAT GUY THAT WE MET
AT THE PREMIERE THE OTHER NIGHT.

SHE SUPPOSEDLY HAS BEEN DATING
HIM FOR, LIKE, A YEAR ALMOST,

SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

- AND SHE'S
NEVER INTRODUCED HIM?

- NO, AND SHE'S...

SHE'S GOING TO MOVE
IN WITH HIM NOW.

I WANT HER TO SORT OF
TURN OVER A NEW LEAF,

MOVE CLOSER TO OUR FAMILY,

MEET A GREAT GUY,

MAYBE GET MARRIED AGAIN.

AND THIS IS JUST...
NOT MY VISION.

- DO WE LIKE HIM?

- WELL, I DON'T KNOW,
YOU KNOW, HIM,

TO KNOW WHETHER OR NOT I DO.

I JUST...

I JUST DIDN'T HAVE
A VERY GOOD FEELING.

- BUT IT JUST SHOCKED YOU.

LIKE, YOU'D EXPECT THAT
IF SOMEBODY'S GOING TO MOVE IN

WITH SOMEBODY,
YOU'D AT LEAST GET TO KNOW...

- SHE SEEMS...
DOES SEEM HAPPIER LATELY.

BUT I STARTED...

CRYING 'CAUSE...
I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY.

I JUST FEEL LIKE IT'S
JUST CONVENIENT FOR HER MAYBE.

I JUST FELT SAD.

- LIKE SHE'S SETTLING?

- THAT'S WHAT I FELT LIKE.

I DON'T THINK IT'S REALLY
WHAT'S BEST FOR HER.

BUT I HAVE TO STAND BACK
AND SAY,

YOU KNOW, I'M NOT HER MOM, SO...

- WELL, IT'S HER LIFE.
I MEAN, THAT'S THE REALITY.

- WHEN WE WERE TEENAGERS

AND WE WOULD BRING HOME,
LIKE, A BOYFRIEND THAT WE LIKED,

IF MY MOM DIDN'T LIKE THEM,

SHE JUST
DIDN'T ACKNOWLEDGE THEM,

SO THAT'S WHAT I'M GOING
TO HAVE TO DO.

IT'S THE ONLY WAY I KNOW.

- IT'S NOT EASY TO COPE WITH IT.

BUT YOU'RE STRONG AND SOLID,
AND YOU'LL DO IT.

ALL RIGHT, I GOT TO GET TO WORK.

I GOT TO GO FINALIZE
A COUPLE THINGS

BEFORE THE, UH, DAY'S UP.

- OKAY.
- ALL RIGHT, I LOVE YOU.

[smooches]

- YOU WANT TO HOLD THE BABY?

- [murmurs]
- YES.

COME HOLD MY BABY. LOOK AT HER.

[laughs]

- I WONDER HOW MANY PEOPLE
ARE GOING TO BE HERE?

- IT LOOKS NICE.

WE'RE ABOUT TO SEE.

I RECENTLY TOOK OVER
AS THE CHIEF CREATIVE DIRECTOR

OF AN ONLINE SALES SITE
FOR A BEAUTY PRODUCT

CALLED BEAUTY TICKET.

AND I'VE BEEN NOMINATED
FOR AN AWARD,

FROM THE L.A. BUSINESS JOURNAL
FOR WOMEN IN BUSINESS.

- SO ARE YOU EXCITED?

- YEAH, IT'S SO NICE...
I'M NERVOUS.

YOU KNOW I DON'T LIKE STUFF
LIKE THIS.

- IT'S ALL RIGHT.

IT'S ABOUT TIME SOMEONE
ACKNOWLEDGES ALL YOUR HARD WORK.

- THANK YOU.

WHEN RUSSELL IS WITH ME,

I ALWAYS FEEL LIKE I NEED
TO WORRY ABOUT RUSSELL.

- CAN I PUT THIS IN MY OFFICE?
- YES.

- RIGHT.
- DO YOU THINK

IT'S GOING TO BE WEIRD
THAT IT SAYS

"WOMEN MAKING A DIFFERENCE"?
- WELL, YOU ARE MARRIED TO ME.

[indistinct chatter]

- [shrieks] THERE YOU ARE!

- OH, MY GOD. HOW ARE YOU?

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR COMING.

- OH, MY GOD.
- YOU GUYS ARE SO SWEET.

- ANYTHING FOR YOU, HONEY.
- I LOVE YOU.

- I'M SO PROUD OF YOU.
I LOVE YOU.

- HEY, CONGRATULATIONS.
- THANK YOU.

REALLY, THANK YOU.

MY FRIENDS ARE HERE
TO SUPPORT ME,

AND IT REALLY MEANS
THE WORLD TO ME.

I THINK
WE SHOULD PROBABLY GO SIT.

- YOU KNOW WHAT?
I SPOKE TO KYLE.

SHE'S ON HER WAY. - OKAY.

- SO LET'S JUST WAIT FOR HER.
- WE'LL WAIT FOR HER.

- YEAH, SO SHE DOESN'T
HAVE TO WALK IN BY HERSELF.

- GREAT. CONGRATULATIONS.
- THANK YOU SO MUCH.

- THANK YOU.

[number pad beeping]

[line trilling]

[cell phone rings] - HELLO.

- HI, DARLING.
- HI. WHERE IS EVERYONE?

I'VE BEEN WALKING AROUND
IN CIRCLES.

- WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

- I AM IN THE HOTEL,

AND I'M GOING UP AND DOWN
FROM ROOM TO ROOM,

AND I CAN'T FIND ANYBODY.

- DARLING, I'M NOT IN A HOTEL.

- ARE YOU
AT TAYLOR'S THING TODAY...

THE LUNCHEON?

- NO.

- WAIT A MINUTE. OKAY.
WAIT A MINUTE.

I THOUGHT THAT YOU
WERE GOING TO BE HERE.

- NO, DARLING.

I HAVE NO IDEA.

I OBVIOUSLY WASN'T TOLD
ABOUT IT.

- OH, OKAY.

OOPS. [laughs] GREAT.

I DON'T KNOW.
I DON'T UNDERSTAND.

ANYWAY, OKAY.

I THOUGHT THAT'S WHY
YOU WERE CALLING ME.

- NO, NO, NOT AT ALL...
I WAS CALLING TO ASK

IF YOU WANT TO COME OVER
FOR TEA TOMORROW.

- OH, FOR SURE.
- ALL RIGHT, DARLING.

ALL RIGHT, SPEAK TO YOU LATER.
- I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER.

- OKAY, BYE.

- I DON'T WANT TO KICKBOX.

- I WANT TO WORK OUT WITH HIM.
- YOU GOT TO CALL HIM.

- I SHOULD.
- HI, GUYS.

- HEY!
- HELLO.

- [smooches] HOW ARE YOU?

- GOOD TO SEE YOU. GREAT. GREAT.

- HEY, HOW ARE YOU?
- GOOD TO SEE YOU.

- I'M SORRY
IF I SMELL LIKE COFFEE.

I JUST HAD TO RUN
AND GET A COFFEE.

- I THINK I JUST MADE
A LITTLE MISTAKE.

- WHAT?

- WELL, I COULDN'T FIND
YOU GUYS, AND LISA JUST CALLED,

AND I SAID,
"WHERE ARE YOU GUYS?"

I GUESS LISA WASN'T INVITED.
- [gasps] NO, SHE'S NOT COMING.

- I DIDN'T KNOW THAT.
- OH.

- AND I'M LIKE...
I SAID, "WHERE ARE YOU?"

- TAYLOR'S GOING TO KILL YOU.

- THAT DOESN'T SURPRISE ME.
- OH, MY GOD.

[cheers and applause] - NO, NO.

- GREAT.

- COMMITMENT TO WOMEN
AND DIVERSITY

EXTENDS BEYOND OUR WORKPLACE,

THROUGH OUR PARTICIPATION
IN PROGRAMS

LIKE THE
LOS ANGELES BUSINESS JOURNAL'S

WOMEN MAKING A DIFFERENCE
AWARDS...

- HEY, CONGRATULATIONS.

HEY, RUSSELL.

I THINK I MAY HAVE JUST MADE
A LITTLE SLIP-UP.

LISA JUST CALLED, AND I SAID,
"WHERE ARE YOU GUYS?

I CAN'T FIND YOU." - [chuckles]

- I DIDN'T KNOW
SHE WASN'T INVITED.

SORRY IF I PUT YOU
IN A BAD POSITION.

I DIDN'T...

- I'M SURE
IT WOULD COME UP ANYWAY.

- I'M SURE
IT WOULD COME UP ANYWAY, TOO.

- I DON'T HAVE ANY REGRETS
THAT LISA'S NOT THERE.

I FEEL LIKE SHE DOESN'T
GENUINELY LIKE ME.

- FOUR HOURS NEXT TO ARMSTRONG?

JESUS. OH, GOD.

- YOU DON'T LIKE SOMEONE,
YOU JUST BE CORDIAL

AND GO ABOUT YOUR BUSINESS.

YOU DON'T NEED
TO TRY TO GET OTHER PEOPLE

TO TURN AGAINST THEM AS WELL.

THERE'S AN ARTICLE IN THE PRESS
ABOUT MY MARRIAGE,

AND I'M NOT HAPPY.

- A CERTAIN PERSON
THAT WE ALL KNOW

TOLD ME THAT LISA
IS VERY GOOD FRIENDS

WITH THE EDITOR OF US MAGAZINE.

IS THIS... HAVE YOU HEARD THIS?
OR IS THIS TRUE?

- YEAH, NO, SHE'S BEEN FRIENDS
WITH HER FOR YEARS.

- OH, SHE HAS?
- MM-HMM.

- I MET WITH ONE
OF MY LITIGATORS TODAY,

AND HE SAID,
"LOOK, WE'LL JUST SERVE THEM

"WITH A LAWSUIT.

"THEY WILL HAPPILY TELL

WHO THEIR SOURCE IS
TO MAKE THE LAWSUIT GO AWAY."

YOU KNOW, IT'S PRETTY SIMPLE.

- AND THE PHILANTHROPIST
OF THE YEAR AWARD WINNER IS...

- KAREN DIAL, PRESIDENT
OF H.B. DROLLINGER COMPANY.

- [imitates sobbing, laughs]

I NEVER EXPECTED TO WIN.

I WAS REALLY EXCITED JUST
TO EVEN BE RECOGNIZED AT ALL.

- SO, WHEN YOU TALKED TO LISA,
WHAT DID SHE SAY?

SHE DIDN'T HAVE A SNIDE REMARK?
- NO.

SHE WAS PROBABLY TOO SHOCKED
TO THINK OF A...

FUNNY REMARK. I DON'T KNOW.

- IT'S TAYLOR'S RIGHT
NOT TO INVITE SOMEBODY

FROM THIS GROUP.

I THINK TAYLOR NOT INVITING
LISA, IS PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE.

- I JUST CALLED KYLE

TO SEE ABOUT COMING TO TEA,
AND SHE SAYS,

"WHERE ARE YOU... AT THE HOTEL?"

I SAID, "NO, SHOULD I BE?"

I'M LIKE,
"WHAT'S SHE TALKING ABOUT?"

AND THEN SHE SAID,
"OH, TAYLOR'S EVENT."

SO THAT'S WEIRD.

I WAS PRETTY SHOCKED, REALLY,

BECAUSE WE ALWAYS, ALL OF US,
INCLUDE EACH OTHER.

IT WOULD BE A FIRST
TO BE KIND OF SINGLED OUT...

KIND OF HURTFUL, REALLY.

- WHY WAS SHE NOT INVITED?

- THIS WAS A BIG DAY FOR ME,

AND I DIDN'T WANT
TO HAVE TO WORRY

ABOUT HER GIVING ME
SOME BACKHANDED COMPLIMENT

WRAPPED UP IN SARCASM.

- IT WAS JUST WEIRD
THE WAY KYLE SAID,

"OH, EVERYBODY'S HERE BUT YOU."

I WAS LIKE, "OH, OKAY."

- THIS IS YOUR DAY.
- YEAH, AND IF IT WERE JUST A...

IF IT WAS LESS SERIOUS,
YOU KNOW,

LIKE, JUST SOME FLIPPANT PARTY
OR SOMETHING,

I COULD DEAL WITH IT. - RIGHT.

- BUT, YOU KNOW,
IT'S IMPORTANT STUFF, SO...

- THERE'S A LOT OF STUFF
GOING ON BETWEEN THEM

THAT NEEDS TO GET
OUT ON THE TABLE.

- YOU DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT IT?
- NO. [chuckles]

- THAT'S WEIRD.
- YEAH, WEIRD.

- WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?
ARE YOU GOING THERE?

- OF COURSE I DON'T WANT
TO GO THERE NOW.

I'M NOT INVITED.

LITTLE STRANGE.

- YOU KNOW WHAT, TAYLOR?

I THINK YOU DID THE RIGHT THING
BY NOT INVITING HER.

- I FEEL A LITTLE BADLY,

BUT I'M SURE I'M GOING TO HAVE
TO DEAL WITH IT NOW, THOUGH.

OUR RELATIONSHIP
IS NOT IN A GOOD PLACE,

AND I JUST REALLY WANTED
TO HAVE MY CORE GROUP AROUND ME

THAT I KNEW
WOULD BE CHEERING ME ON

AND NOT JUDGING ME.

- SOMEBODY'S PLAYING GAMES,
HUH, GIGGSTER?

WE CAN PLAY GAMES, TOO, RIGHT?

HMM?

HMM.

- COMING UP...

- [crying]
IF YOU CAN'T BE MY FRIEND,

JUST PLEASE DON'T BE MY ENEMY.

- SO TODAY EVERYBODY'S GOING
TO HELP THEMSELVES,

BECAUSE IT'S GOING TO BE
KIND OF CASUAL.

- MM-HMM.
- BUT THESE, UH, TEACUPS...

- UH-HUH.
- WHEN I JUST SAY,

"CAN WE HAVE TEA?" JUST POUR IT.

- MM-HMM.
- AND DO IT BLACK, YOU KNOW?

- BLACK, OKAY.
- AND THEN I HAVE

THE MILK AND SUGAR IN THERE.
- YEAH, OKAY.

- SO THE ONLY TIME I REALLY
WANT YOU TO COME IN

IS TO DO THE TEA

AND IF YOU HEAR ME SCREAMING.

[both laugh]
YOU THINK I'M JOKING, RIGHT?

- YEAH. UH-HUH.
- YEAH. I'M NOT.

I'VE BEEN SO BUSY,
BUT I'M HAVING A TEA PARTY.

I'M GOING TO INVITE TAYLOR.
I'M GOING TO RISE ABOVE IT.

IT SEEMS RIDICULOUS
TO PLAY TIT FOR TAT.

TO BE HONEST,
I DON'T WANT TO GET

INTO PETTY BULL[bleep].

- TENNIS COURT? [dog yaps]

- OH!
- TENNIS COURT... LET'S GO.

[dogs yapping]

COME ON, LET'S GO.
- TENNIS COURT?

OKAY, WELL,
THEN HE CAN GO WALKIES.

HE DOESN'T WANT TO HANG OUT
WITH THESE...

- PUT HIM IN HIS PRAM
FOR ONE SECOND,

'CAUSE I WAS JUST GOING
TO FINISH WHAT I'M DOING.

- OKAY, COME ON, THEN.

WISH ME LUCK. - GOOD LUCK.

YOU'RE ONLY HAVING TEA.
WHAT DO YOU NEED LUCK FOR?

- [laughing] YOU KNOW...

BYE.

OH, I LOVE THIS.
THIS IS SO CUTE.

OKAY.

WHERE ARE THEY?
HOW CAN ADRIENNE BE LATE AGAIN?

SHE LIVES ACROSS THE ROAD,
FOR GOODNESS SAKE.

HELLO!

- HELLO!
- QUICK, COME IN!

IT'S JUST THE THREE OF YOU,
WE CAN SHUT THE GATES.

- OH, HI!

- OH.
- HELLO.

- HELLO, DARLING.
- HELLO.

- SO WHAT'S THE SPECIAL
OCCASION... JUST TEA FOR FUN?

- JUST TEA? WHY NOT?

WE'RE ALL SO BUSY...
JUST LIKE HALF AND HOUR,

JUST FOR REGROUPING.

- OH, LOOK HOW PRETTY
THIS LOOKS.

- OH, GOOD.

WELL, I JUST LITERALLY
THREW IT TOGETHER.

- HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT TO ME?

- DIDN'T YOU THREE HAVE TO THROW
SOMETHING LIKE THIS TOGETHER?

- WHAT?
- HI, GIRLS.

- ARE YOU LEAVING?
- NO, I'M JUST GOING

TO POP THE CHAMPAGNE FOR YOU.
- OH, I THOUGHT YOU SAID...

[cork pops] - PERFECT.

- THIS FEELS SO FORMAL FOR US.
- I KNOW.

- BUT IT'S GOOD, ISN'T IT?
- IT IS.

I LOVE ALL THE PINK.
I LOVE ALL THE FLOWERS.

- OH, MY GOD.
I LOVE YOUR STEMWARE.

- IS THAT SWEET?

- OH, CAMILLE. I'M SO SORRY...
WITH EVERYTHING,

WHAT HE'S DOING TO YOU.
- THANK YOU.

HE WON'T SPEAK WITH ME.

AND I THINK, YOU KNOW...
- THAT'S RIDICULOUS.

- KELSEY HAS JUST ASKED
FOR PRIMARY CUSTODY OF THE KIDS.

- BECAUSE KELSEY RIGHT NOW
IS CALLING ALL THE SHOTS

WITH THE KIDS,
AND, NO, I'M SORRY...

YOU DON'T JUST LEAVE ME
AND THE KIDS

AND THEN, YOU KNOW,
TRY TO CALL ALL THE SHOTS.

- WHAT ELSE CAN HE DO?

WHAT ELSE
CAN HE POSSIBLY DO TO ME?

- HE'S GOT TO THE LOWEST
OF THE LOW.

- WELL, THANKS
FOR BEING SUPPORTIVE, LISA.

THANK YOU. - YEAH.

- YOU LEARN WHO YOUR FRIENDS ARE
DURING SOMETHING LIKE THIS.

- ABSOLUTELY.
- YEAH.

- TO BE A MOTHER
AND TO BE FIGHTING

THE KIND OF BATTLE
THAT SHE'S HAD TO ENDURE,

IT'S PRETTY SAD.

WELL, WE'RE ON YOUR SIDE,
DARLING.

- WHO WASN'T?
- CHEERS.

- HERE'S TO ANOTHER...

HERE'S ANOTHER CHAPTER
IN YOUR LIFE, SO...

- OH, MY GOD.
- THANK YOU.

[laughter]

- BUT MOVING ON...

OH, DARLING.

- OH, MY GOSH,
THIS LOOKS SO NICE, LISA.

I HAVE TO PICK
AT SOMETHING, THOUGH.

- OH, HAVE ANYTHING.

LET ME DO IT. LET ME DO IT.
- OKAY.

- I HAVE TO TELL YOU,

I GOT ANOTHER EMAIL
FROM RUSSELL TODAY.

DID ANYBODY ELSE GET ONE?

- I GOT AN EMAIL.
- I GOT IT.

- YOU DID?
- I GOT IT.

- "TAYLOR RECENTLY WANTED
TO LOSE A FEW POUNDS

"PRIOR TO A BIG EVENT
AND DECIDED TO TAKE

A DIET SUPPLEMENT."
- OH, COME ON.

- WHY IS SHE ON DIET PILLS?
- I DON'T UNDERSTAND.

- NO.
- I DON'T KNOW.

- WHY WOULD SHE TAKE SOMETHING
TO LOSE WEIGHT

WHEN SHE'S ALREADY SO THIN?

- IT'S NICE TO KNOW
THAT SHE HAS BEEN EATING...

EVEN IF IT IS ONLY DIET PILLS.

YEAH, BUT WHY
WOULD HE SEND IT TO US?

- IT'S A MYSTERY TO ME.
- I DON'T UNDERSTAND.

- THAT WHOLE THING'S
A MYSTERY TO ME.

- IS SHE COMING TODAY,
BY THE WAY?

- I THINK SO.

- OH.

- OF COURSE.
I INVITED EVERYBODY.

I INVITED KIM, TAYLOR.
I WOULDN'T LEAVE ANYBODY OUT.

CREAM CHEESE, CUCUMBER...
IT'S VERY ENGLISH.

DO YOU WANT SOME CAKES
OR SOMETHING?

- HELLO.
- HI. WOW!

EVERYBODY ON ONE COUCH.

HOW ARE YOU GIRLS? - GOOD.

- THANK YOU FOR INVITING ME.

HOW ARE YOU?
- HI. FINE. THANK YOU.

- HOW ARE...
HOW'S EVERYBODY ELSE?

- I KNOW.
- HI. HELLO.

- HI, GORGEOUS.
- WE'RE ALMOST MATCHING.

HI, HONEY. - THAT'S OKAY.

I DON'T MIND ALL SITTING
ON ONE COUCH.

[indistinct chattering]

- DO YOU THINK KIM'S COMING?
SHOULD WE CALL HER?

- SHE'S MOVING IN...
WITH SOMEONE.

- REALLY?
- REALLY?

- MM-HMM.
- OKAY.

- I WAS VERY, LIKE,
TAKEN ABACK WHEN SHE TOLD ME.

- IS SHE READY FOR THIS?
I MEAN, OBVIOUSLY...

- THAT'S WHAT I SAID...
"I FEEL LIKE YOU'RE JUMPING

INTO SOMETHING, AND..."
- I MEAN, THIS IS A BIG MOVE.

- I DON'T EVEN KNOW HIM,
AND NOT THAT I'M HER MOM,

AND I KNOW REBECCA TOLD ME
MY MOM SAID...

I'M NOT HER MOM. AND I JUST...

I DON'T FEEL LIKE
THAT'S WHAT SHE REALLY WANTS.

- WELL, HOW LONG
HAS SHE BEEN WITH HIM?

- SHE SAID A YEAR.

I'M LIKE, "IF YOU'VE BEEN
WITH HIM A YEAR"...

- WHERE HAVE WE BEEN?

I FEEL LIKE,
"WHERE HAVE I BEEN?"

- HOW DO YOU THINK
I FEEL AS HER SISTER?

- SHE'S BEEN THROUGH SO MUCH.

- DO YOU THINK SHE'S DOING IT
JUST BECAUSE SHE WANTS COMPANY?

- THAT'S WHAT I FEEL.
- YEAH.

- AND I DON'T WANT HER
TO MAKE THAT DECISION

BASED ON BEING LONELY.

- I'M GOING TO CALL HER,
LET ME CALL HER.

I'M GOING TO CALL HER
AND SEE IF SHE'S COMING.

DARLING, ARE YOU COMING?

OH, COME ON,
I REALLY WANTED YOU TO COME.

FOR GOODNESS SAKE,

HOW LONG'S THIS MOVE
GOING TO TAKE.

[imitating KimÑ
"OH, I CAN'T COME.

I'M REALLY SORRY."

[normal voice] I'M LIKE... I DON'T
EVEN KNOW WHY WE BOTHER ANYMORE.

OKAY, BYE, DARLING. BYE.

I KNOW YOU'RE VERY FUN.
I KNOW THAT.

- [British accent]
SUGAR, PACKED WITH SUGAR.

- ANYWAY, DARLING,
COME AND EAT SOME CAKES.

I SPENT ALL MORNING BAKING.

- OH, YEAH, RIGHT. [laughter]

- EVEN THOUGH I SAY THAT,
I TRIED.

OH, I HEARD YOU HAD
AN EVENT YESTERDAY.

- I DID. I DID.

I GOT A NOMINATION
AND HAD A LITTLE LUNCHEON.

- AND THEY ALL WENT, YEAH.
- YEAH.

- WELL, THAT WAS NICE
THAT YOU WERE NOMINATED.

- IT WAS.
- I KNOW, BUT I WAS QUITE UPSET

THAT YOU DIDN'T INVITE ME,
TO BE HONEST, TAYLOR,

BECAUSE EVERYTHING I'VE DONE,
I'VE ALWAYS INVITED YOU...

ALWAYS BEEN VERY KIND TO YOU.

- I AGREE.
- I INVITED YOU

TO PANDORA'S ENGAGEMENT PARTY.
- I AGREE.

AND I CAME
BEARING MY BEST WISHES.

- WELL, TO INVITE CAMILLE
AND KYLE...

- WHO ARE MY FRIENDS.

- YEAH, BUT WHO EQUALLY...
WE'VE ALL BEEN A GROUP.

I WOULDN'T EXCLUDE YOU.

- NO, YOU WOULDN'T,
EXCEPT THAT, LISA,

THE LAST COUPLE OF TIMES
YOU AND I HAVE HAD

A CONVERSATION,
YOU HAVE LED INTO IT

BY SAYING, AND I QUOTE,
"I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND."

- I HAVEN'T SAID,
"I'M NOT YOUR FRIEND."

- LISA,
YOU BETTER BACKTRACK, GIRL...

- CALM DOWN.
- YES, YOU HAVE!

- I'M NOT SAYING
I'M YOUR BEST FRIEND.

I'M JUST SAYING,

RIGHT NOW IF YOU NEED SOMETHING
SORTED OUT, I'LL HELP YOU.

WHY WOULD I SAY
THAT YOU COULD COME

AND LIVE IN MY HOUSE
WITH YOUR DAUGHTER...

- BECAUSE IT'S TO MAKE YOU
LOOK LIKE A SAINT.

- WELL, YOU KNOW, YOU DON'T HAVE
TO WORRY ABOUT IT ANYMORE,

BECAUSE THE OFFER'S RESCINDED.

- LISA, DO YOU REALLY THINK
I WOULD COME

TO SOMEONE'S HOUSE...
- WHY ARE YOU HERE, THEN?

- WHO LEADS IN WITH SAYING...
- WHY ARE YOU HERE?

- "I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND"?

- OH.
- BECAUSE YOU INVITED ME.

THAT'S WHY I'M HERE.

- HMM. WELL, IF YOU'RE
NOT MY FRIEND,

I DON'T NORMALLY INVITE...

- NO, I DIDN'T SAY
I WASN'T YOUR FRIEND.

I HAVE DONE EVERYTHING I CAN...

DON'T... DON'T CUT ME OFF!

THIS IS WHAT YOU DO TO ME.

YOU START CONVERSATIONS WITH ME
AND CAMILLE,

AND YOU NEVER LET ME FINISH.

I HAVE BENT OVER BACKWARDS

SINCE THE DAY I MET YOU...

[voice breaking]
TO BE KIND TO YOU.

AND YOU HAVE TREATED ME
SO POORLY

THAT IT IS EMBARRASSING
- NO, I HAVEN'T, DEAR.

- YES, YOU HAVE.

YOU HAVE TOLD PEOPLE

I DO NOT HAVE FRIENDS.

- WHAT DO YOU MEAN TOLD PEOPLE
YOU DON'T HAVE FRIENDS?

- SHALL I ASK THE ROOM
TO BE INVOLVED?

- YES, ASK THEM.
- OKAY.

- I KNOW
WHAT YOU'RE REFERRING TO

ABOUT THE "FRIENDS" SITUATION.

AND THAT CAME UP

BECAUSE WHEN
WE WERE AT PAUL'S OFFICE,

YOU SAID THAT...

CAMILLE AND TAYLOR
WEREN'T FRIENDS.

- NO, I SAID THEY DON'T SEE
EACH OTHER VERY OFTEN.

KIM, MYSELF, AND CAMILLE
AREN'T CLOSE TO HER AT ALL.

- CAMILLE HAS LUNCH
AND DINNER WITH HER.

- NO. ANYWAY...
- YES, THEY DO, LISA.

- YEAH, THEY DO.
- YEAH, THEY DO.

- YOU SAID TO ME,
"HAVE YOU SEEN TAYLOR A LOT

SINCE YOUR DIVORCE?" - YEAH.

- AND I SAID, "NO, I HAVEN'T.
SHE CAME OUT ONCE."

- BUT WHY ARE YOU BRINGING UP
MY RELATIONSHIP WITH CAMILLE?

IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS.

WHY ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT ME
BEHIND MY BACK?

- I'M NOT TALKING...
- REALLY?

- YOU DON'T THINK EVERYBODY
HAS CONVERSATIONS?

- NOT IN THE WAY YOU DO.

- OH, WELL, I DON'T KNOW
WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.

- EVERYBODY ELSE IS AFRAID
TO CONFRONT YOU, LISA.

AND YOU KNOW WHAT?
I'M DOING SO MUCH WORK

ON MYSELF, I WANT TO BE
REALLY "HONEST" WITH YOU

AND SAY STOP STIRRING THE POT...
- WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

- AND STEPPING AWAY
FROM THE FIRE.

- I HAVE NO IDEA
WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.

- I AM GOING THROUGH SO MUCH
IN MY LIFE, LISA.

I HAVE NEVER IN MY LIFE TRIED
TO MAKE SOMEBODY BE MY FRIEND

[voice breaking]
MORE THAN I'VE TRIED FOR YOU.

AND I FEEL LIKE A FOOL.
- WHEN HAVE YOU TRIED?

WHEN HAVE YOU EVER...
- I HAVE BEEN...

I'VE KISSED YOUR ASS FOR A YEAR

TRYING TO MAKE YOU LIKE ME.

I HAVE ASKED YOU SO MANY TIMES,

"ARE YOU MY FRIEND,
OR ARE YOU NOT MY FRIEND?"

AND I'VE SAID TO YOU...
- SOMETIMES...

- JUST BE QUIET FOR A SECOND!

I NEED STRONG WOMEN
AROUND ME SO BADLY,

AND I HAVE TOLD YOU THAT.

AND YOU LOOK ME IN THE EYES
AND SAY ONE THING,

AND THEN YOU GO BEHIND MY BACK

AND SAY I DON'T HAVE FRIENDS.
- NO, TAYLOR.

TAYLOR... - IT'S A FACT!

- TAYLOR, I WAS WORRIED FOR YOU.

I WAS SCARED FOR YOUR WELFARE...
YES OR NO?

- YES, ONCE IT GOT
TO THE EXTREME.

BUT WHAT ABOUT IN THE PAST?
- BECAUSE OF ALL...

- WHY ARE YOU TALKING
ABOUT ME BEHIND MY BACK?

IT IS BREAKING MY HEART.

PLEASE...

IF YOU CAN'T BE MY FRIEND,

JUST PLEASE DON'T BE MY ENEMY,

BECAUSE MY LIFE
IS TOUGH ENOUGH AS IT IS.

PLEASE.

I JUST WANTED TO COME
BECAUSE YOU INVITED ME.

AND I GUESS THERE'S STILL
A PART OF ME

THAT WOULD LOVE TO HAVE YOU
AS A FRIEND.

BUT I'LL NEVER
BE GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU.

- WHAT'S "GOOD ENOUGH"? THAT'S...

- I DON'T KNOW. YOU TELL ME.

- DON'T LEAVE.
TAYLOR, DON'T LEAVE!

- I'VE TRIED. NO.
- HOLD ON.

All: TAYLOR, TAYLOR.

- TAYLOR, DON'T LEAVE.
- PLEASE, PLEASE.

- COMING UP...

- WHO IS TELLING THE TRUTH HERE?

- I'M TALKING ABOUT SAYING
YOUR HUSBAND ABUSES YOU.

- PLEASE CALM DOWN.
- TAYLOR, DON'T... SIT DOWN.

PLEASE SIT DOWN.
- NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.

- LISTEN, COME OVER HERE.
- TELL HER WHAT YOU THINK.

- I DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS.
- GO AHEAD.

- NO, I CAN'T. I JUST CAN'T.

I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS ANYMORE.

I CAN'T. I'M STRUGGLING SO MUCH.

AND I'M WORKING ON MYSELF,
AND I'M...

[sobs] I AM SO FLAWED
AND SO IMPERFECT,

AND YOU GIVE ME
THE WORST ANXIETY EVERY TIME

I'M IN YOUR PRESENCE. - WHY?

- BECAUSE YOU JUDGE ME.

AND YOU SAY THINGS LIKE,
"I'M NOT YOUR FRIEND."

WHO SAYS THAT
TO ANOTHER HUMAN BEING?

- I'M JUST SAYING
I WANTED TO HELP YOU, BUT...

- YOU WANT TO HELP ME HOW?

- BECAUSE I WAS SCARED FOR YOU...
- OKAY.

I'M SCARED FOR ME, TOO.
- BECAUSE OF WHAT YOU TOLD ME.

- ABSOLUTELY! WHAT'S...
- SO I WANTED TO SAY

I'M NOT... BECAUSE YOU AND I
HAVE NEVER BEEN CLOSE,

I SAID THAT. - BUT WHY?

BECAUSE YOU'VE HAD
A WALL UP AGAINST ME.

- THAT BOTHERS HER.

- BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT CLOSE
NECESSARILY.

- BUT I TRIED TO BE CLOSE
TO YOU.

- I WANTED TO HELP YOU,
BECAUSE I WAS SCARED FOR YOU.

- NO, LISA, PLEASE.

- WELL, OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT?
I SHOULDN'T HAVE SAID

I WANTED TO HELP YOU.

I WAS WRONG TO SAY THAT, OKAY?

- BUT YOU'RE WRONG TO SAY,
"I'M NOT YOUR FRIEND."

- I'VE NEVER SAID THAT.

WHAT I'M SAYING IS,
YOU AND I HAVE HAD OUR MOMENTS.

WE DIDN'T GET OFF
TO A GOOD START.

I WASN'T WILDLY CRAZY
ABOUT YOUR HUSBAND.

- I'M NOT WILDLY CRAZY
ABOUT MY HUSBAND

90% OF THE TIME,
SO WELCOME ABOARD.

- I KNOW THAT.
BUT I WAS JUST SAYING,

OKAY, WE'VE HAD OUR MOMENTS,

I'M NOT YOUR BEST FRIEND,
BUT IF YOU'RE IN TROUBLE,

YOU HAVE A PLACE TO GO.

THAT WAS MY POINT.
- BUT WHEN YOU SAY,

"I'M NOT YOUR FRIEND," IT...
- OH. [sighs]

- MAYBE A BETTER WAY
OF SAYING IT IS

"LISTEN, IF YOU NEED HELP,

PLEASE, I'M HERE FOR YOU,"

INSTEAD OF SAYING,
"I'M NOT YOUR FRIEND."

- I DIDN'T SAY,
"I'M NOT YOUR FRIEND"!

I SAID... - BUT THAT'S WHAT

SHE'S SAYING YOU SAID, OKAY?
OKAY, OKAY.

IT'S NOT THAT YOU MEAN IT.
IT IS THE WAY YOU SAY IT.

- I APOLOGIZE FOR SAYING,
"I'M NOT YOUR BEST FRIEND,"

OR, "I'M NOT YOUR FRIEND,"

OR, "WE HAVEN'T HAD
A GREAT START TOGETHER."

I APOLOGIZE FOR THAT, TAYLOR.

AND SOME THINGS THAT YOU'VE SAID

HAVEN'T KIND OF
REALLY GELLED WITH ME.

BUT THAT'S NORMAL...
YOU DON'T GET SIX WOMEN THAT GO,

"I LOVE EACH AND EVERY ONE
OF YOU."

- RIGHT.
- AND I WASN'T FRIENDLY

WITH CAMILLE PARTICULARLY...
ONLY WHEN I SAW HER

GOING THROUGH A HARD TIME,

I FELT THAT I WANTED
TO SUPPORT HER.

I AM YOUR FRIEND IF YOU NEED ME.

DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT?

THAT'S EXACTLY
WHAT I'M SAYING TO YOU.

- BUT I HAVE TRIED TO BE YOUR
FRIEND SINCE THE DAY I MET YOU.

I'VE GONE OUT OF MY WAY

TO TRY AND GET CLOSE TO YOU
AND TO BE YOUR FRIEND.

AND I FEEL LIKE AT EVERY TURN,

YOU HAVE SOME COMMENT THAT...

IS EITHER HURTFUL,
OR IT'S SARCASTIC,

WHICH I KNOW IS YOUR WAY,
BUT IT STILL HURTS.

- OKAY, I DON'T MEAN
TO HURT YOU.

I'M SORRY.
I DON'T MEAN TO HURT YOU.

- WELL, AND I DON'T MEAN
TO HURT YOU EITHER.

BUT I HAVE TO KNOW WHO MY
FRIENDS ARE RIGHT NOW, LISA,

BECAUSE I'M STILL STRUGGLING.

AND I HAVE A CHILD,

AND I HAVE AN ENORMOUS AMOUNT
OF RESPONSIBILITY.

AND I'M HONESTLY DOING
THE BEST I CAN.

I'M TRYING TO FIND SELF-ESTEEM.

I'M TRYING TO BE
WHO YOU ARE, I GUESS...

OR WHO YOU ARE OR WHO YOU ARE,

BUT I'M NOT THERE YET.
- YOU DON'T NEED TO BE WHO I AM

OR WHO SHE IS...
YOU NEED TO BE YOURSELF.

AND YOU NEED TO...
- BUT I DON'T KNOW WHO I AM!

AND I DON'T NEED YOU JUDGING ME
ALONG THE WAY!

- I AM NOT JUDGING YOU.
- BUT YOU DO!

IN YOUR SARCASTIC WAY, YOU DO.

- YOU KNOW WHAT? I'M SORRY.

OKAY, OKAY. - YOU MAKE ME FEEL

BAD ABOUT MYSELF.

- OKAY, WELL, THEN THAT'S FINE.
NOW I KNOW.

- OKAY.

I DIDN'T MEAN TO RUIN YOUR TEA.

- SHE SEEMED LIKE SHE WAS
ON A MISSION.

AND SHE WAS ANGRY AT LISA,

SO SHE WAS GOING IN
FOR THE KILL.

- LET'S ALL JUST BE HONEST
FOR ONCE, INSTEAD OF JUST ME.

YOU'RE THE ONE TALKING
ABOUT FRIENDS.

- YEAH, IT'S FINE.
- AND I'M NOT SURE

THAT YOUR DEFINITION OF FRIENDS
IS SO CLEAR.

MAYBE YOU AND I
SHOULD SIT DOWN ALONE...

- YEAH. NO, I AGREE.

- AND I'LL GIVE YOU
A REAL HONEST VIEW

OF WHAT EVERYONE ELSE IS FEELING

THAT DOESN'T WANT TO SPEAK UP
FOR THEMSELF...

- RIGHT.

- JUST SO YOU KNOW
WHO YOUR FRIENDS ARE.

LET'S TALK ABOUT LISA'S EGO

AND HOW IT'S BEEN INFLATED
THIS YEAR.

OVER THE LAST YEAR,
HAVE YOU NOT SAID

THAT LISA'S EGO
IS OUT OF CONTROL?

- I THINK IT'S, UH...
SHE HAS A BIG EGO.

- OKAY.
- WOW. GOD, THAT'S REALLY GOOD.

- LISA, YOU ARE YOUR OWN
SCREEN SAVER ON YOUR iPAD.

IT'S A PICTURE OF YOU
WITH A DOG THIS BIG.

- WITH MY DOG... SO WHAT?

WHAT'S WRONG WITH THAT?

WHY CAN'T I HAVE THAT
AS MY HOME PAGE?

YEAH, TAYLOR, MY EGO'S
REALLY OUT OF CONTROL.

- IT'S OBNOXIOUS.

- OH, FOR GOD'S SAKE.
- YOU'RE SO SELF-INVOLVED...

IT'S UNBELIEVABLE TO ME.

- OH, YOU KNOW WHAT?
I'M ENDING THIS.

THIS IS JUST TOO BITCHY FOR ME.
- OKAY, WELL...

- THAT'S NOT A FRIEND.
- THEY'RE NOT TELLING YOU

WHAT THEY THINK... I'M THE ONLY
ONE THAT'S SPEAKING UP.

- I DIDN'T REALIZE THEY WERE
ALL TRASHING ME BEHIND MY BACK.

- I DIDN'T SAY THAT.

- I DIDN'T REALIZE THEY WERE
ALL TRASHING ME BEHIND MY BACK,

BECAUSE I'VE NEVER SAID
ANYTHING NEGATIVE ABOUT YOU,

NEVER SAID ANYTHING NEGATIVE
ABOUT YOU OR YOU,

AND THE ONLY PERSON I'VE FELT
FRICTION WITH IS TAYLOR.

SO IF THEY'RE ALL TRASHING ME,
THEN THAT'S FINE.

- I'M LEAVING.
- I GET IT. I HEAR IT FROM YOU.

- YOU PEOPLE
ARE BEING DISHONEST.

I'M EXPECTING THE GIRLS
TO BACK ME UP.

BUT THEY'RE A BUNCH OF CHICKENS.

[imitates squawking]

WELL, I JUST STORMED OUT.

[laughs] - YOU STORMED OUT?

- YEAH, I'VE HAD IT.
- WAIT A MINUTE.

WAIT A MINUTE. WHAT?
- I'M THE ONLY ONE

THAT'S BEING HONEST
ABOUT HOW WE FEEL

ABOUT LISA, AND I'VE HAD IT.

- I'M JUST ACTUALLY
LOOKING FOR ADRIENNE.

- EVERYBODY TALKS
ABOUT WHAT LISA HAS BECOME,

AND NO ONE WILL ADMIT IT.

AND I'M THE ONLY ONE
THAT'S ADMITTING IT NOW.

- I THOUGHT KYLE, OF ALL,
WAS A LITTLE UPSET

ABOUT THINGS, TOO.

- KYLE TALKS A LOT
BEHIND LISA'S BACK,

BUT SHE WON'T SAY ANYTHING
TO HER FACE.

SO DOES ADRIENNE.
SO DOES CAMILLE.

EVERYBODY HAS SOMETHING TO SAY
WHEN NOBODY ELSE IS AROUND,

BUT THE TRUTH OF THE MATTER
IS THEY WON'T SAY IT

TO LISA'S FACE 'CAUSE
THEY'RE ALL AFRAID OF HER.

- I'LL TELL YOU
EXACTLY WHAT I SAID.

- NO, I KNOW,
BUT YOU DIDN'T OFFEND ME.

BUT I'VE NEVER...
- I HAVE HER SAYING,

YOU KNOW, "BACK ME,"
AND I HAVE YOU SAYING,

"BACK ME."
WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?

EVEN THOUGH THEY WANTED ME
TO STEP IN

AND SUPPORT BOTH OF THEM,

I DON'T SEE WHY
WE HAVE TO GET INVOLVED

AND HELP THEM
FIGHT THEIR BATTLES.

NO ONE'S HELPED ME
FIGHT MY BATTLES BEFORE.

I WANTED TO BE THERE
FOR BOTH OF YOU.

I'M SORRY
THAT I'M NOT IN HIGH SCHOOL

AND SAY, "I'M GOING TO DO THIS,"
OR I-I MEAN...

- I'VE NEVER SAID
ANYTHING NEGATIVE

ABOUT YOU, YOU.

THE ONLY PERSON I'VE EVER HAD A
BIT OF A PROBLEM WITH IS TAYLOR.

I'M NOT SURE WHAT'S TRUE.

I DON'T KNOW. I'M UNSURE.

AND YOU'VE ALL VOICED
THE SAME OPINION TO ME.

IT SEEMS SILLY TO ME

THAT WE'RE FOCUSING
ON MY RELATIONSHIP WITH TAYLOR

WHEN WE'VE HEARD
SO MANY TERRIBLE THINGS

ABOUT TAYLOR'S MARRIAGE.

I HAVE DISTANCED MYSELF
FROM TAYLOR IN THE PAST,

BECAUSE I'M NOT SURE
I'M GETTING THE WHOLE STORY.

SO I DON'T HAVE TIME
TO INVEST IN FRIENDSHIPS

THAT I DON'T QUITE KNOW
WHAT TO BELIEVE.

- HOW COULD SOMEBODY
LIVE WITH SOMEBODY

THAT IS SO HORRIFIC
TO THIS PERSON,

AND THEN FIVE MINUTES LATER,
THEY'RE BEST FRIENDS?

IT'S HARD.
- "A", IT'S EITHER NOT TRUE...

- YES.
- OR "B"...

- WELL, IT HAS TO BE TRUE.
- SHE'S A CLASSIC...

TYPICAL SITUATION
WHERE THEY ARE IN DENIAL.

- WHEN SHE CAME OVER FOR LUNCH,

SHE TALKED TO ME
FOR ALMOST THREE HOURS

ABOUT HOW SHE THOUGHT
IT WAS OVER.

AND THEN AFTER WE HAD
THIS LONG CONVERSATION

ABOUT SHE KNEW THAT IT WAS OVER
AND IT WAS THE END,

SHE GIVES ME A HUG,

AND THEN SHE'S TELLING ME,
"OH, I'M LEAVING

ON A G-4,"
WITH A SMILE ON HER FACE!

I'M LIKE, "HOW CAN YOU BE
LEAVING ON A G-4

WITH YOUR HUSBAND,
IF HE'S LEAVING YOU?"

- YOU'RE RIGHT. YOU'RE RIGHT.

- SHE IS TELLING ME
THAT HE'S LEAVING HER FOR GOOD,

AND SHE NEEDS A PLACE TO STAY.

WHY WOULD SHE BE JUMPING
ON A PLANE WITH HIM,

THREE HOURS LATER?

THAT TO ME IS A MIXED MESSAGE.
- YOU'RE EXACTLY RIGHT.

- THAT'S WHEN I'M LIKE,
"WHO'S TELLING THE TRUTH HERE?"

- I KNOW. I JUST...
- THAT CONFUSES ME.

- MAYBE SHE'S
EXAGGERATED THINGS.

OR MAYBE PEOPLE...
YOU KNOW, LIKE,

PEOPLE SAY THEY HAVE MORE
THAN THEY HAVE, WHATEVER.

WELL, WELCOME TO L.A.

YOU KNOW, I'M NOT
THAT OFFENDED BY THAT.

- HELLO. WELCOME TO L.A.

- IF SOMEBODY PRETENDS TO HAVE
MORE THAN THEY HAVE

OR THEY MIGHT TWIST SOMETHING...
- I'M TALKING ABOUT SAYING

YOUR HUSBAND ABUSES YOU.
- LET ME FINISH.

I'M SAYING...
- THAT'S A VERY DIFFERENT THING

TO SAYING,
"I'VE GOT MORE THAN I HAVE."

- EVERY TIME I TALK
TO THE OTHER GIRLS ABOUT IT,

THEY WERE LIKE,
"WE'LL BACK YOU UP."

AND THEN I GET IN A SITUATION...

NOBODY BACKED ME UP.

NO ONE ADMITTED EVERYTHING
THEY'VE BEEN TALKING ABOUT

FOR MONTHS.

- EXCEPT...
- THE "GIGGY" IS UP, OKAY?

THE "GIGGY" IS UP. I GOT IT.

THEY'RE PROBABLY IN THERE
TALKING ABOUT ME NOW.

- HOW CAN WE HAVE
ANY RELATIONSHIP WITH HER

IF WE'RE ALL DOUBTING
WHAT SHE SAYS?

- WHAT BOTHERS ME IS THAT SHE
DOESN'T HAVE ENOUGH WILLPOWER

TO GET THROUGH IT
AND TO ACCEPT SOMEBODY...

- IF IT'S TRUE.

- IF IT'S NOT, I DON'T EVEN
WANT TO BE ASSOCIATED

WITH ANY TALK
ABOUT SOMETHING LIKE THIS,

BECAUSE THAT IS HORRIFIC.
- BECAUSE IF IT'S NOT TRUE,

IT MAKES US ALL LOOK LIKE

WE'RE AWFUL PEOPLE.
- AND THIS IS GOING

TO RUIN SOMEONE'S LIFE...
A LOT OF PEOPLE'S LIVES.

- RUSSELL'S ALWAYS BEEN
LOVELY TO ME.

HE'S ALWAYS BEEN NICE,

SO I DON'T KNOW
WHAT TO BELIEVE AT THIS POINT.

- I THINK UNLESS I KNOW
FOR A FACT, I CAN'T JUDGE.

I CAN'T JUDGE.

I DON'T KNOW.
- BUT THIS IS YOUR FRIEND...

THAT'S SAYING IT.
- YES, SHE IS MY FRIEND,

BUT IT'S JUST NOT
MATCHING UP, TO ME.

- EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THOSE
GIRLS IN THERE IS AFRAID OF HER.

THEY'RE ALL AFRAID OF HER.

- WELL, ANYWAY,
SORRY YOU RAN INTO ME.

- I DIDN'T KNOW ANY OF THIS.

- UNLESS I SEE SOMETHING
WITH MY OWN EYES,

I JUST CAN'T SAY.

- DO WE ALL BELIEVE
IT'S TRUE OR NOT?

- COMING UP...

- YOU'RE SAYING, "EVERYBODY'S
NOT SAYING ANYTHING."

both: WE HAVE ALL PROTECTED YOU.

- BECAUSE WE DON'T SAY
THAT HE HITS YOU.

- I'M TIRED OF EVERYBODY
NOT TELLING THE TRUTH.

- THAT'S REALLY UNCOOL.

- I HAVE ONE LITTLE SPOT
IN HERE.

SHOULD I MASSAGE THAT OR NOT?
FEEL IT.

IT LOOKS GOOD, THOUGH, HUH?
- LET ME JUST...

- I MEAN,
I'M SO THRILLED WITH IT.

- HOLD ON. THAT MIGHT BE
JUST A BRUISE.

YOU MEAN HERE?
- NO, NO, NO. FEEL RIGHT THERE.

- WELL...
- IF THAT'S GOING TO DISSIPATE...

- OKAY, OPEN YOUR MOUTH
A LITTLE BIT.

THAT ACTUALLY FEELS GOOD.
LET ME LOOK.

- ISN'T THIS...
SEE, IT'S A SOFTER...

I STILL WOULD LIKE
TO SEE MORE IN HERE, THOUGH.

- REALLY? MORE?
- YEAH, BECAUSE IT'S STILL TOO...

YOU'RE STILL TOO HOLLOW HERE.
JUST A LITTLE BIT MORE.

BUT I'LL TELL YOU, THOUGH,
THIS SIDE'S GOOD.

- I LOOK GOOD. LOOK.

[overlapping chatter]

- PAUL NEEDS YOU
TO CALL THE HOUSE.

- REALLY?

- I'VE BEEN STANDING AT THE GATE
TALKING TO HIM.

- OKAY.

- WILL YOU COME
SIT BACK DOWN, TAYLOR?

- WELL, WE JUST
KIND OF REHASHED THE, UM,

THE SITUATION YOU'RE GOING
THROUGH WITH YOUR HUSBAND.

THIS IS AN INTERVENTION

THAT WAS UNEXPECTED,
BUT POSSIBLY NEEDED.

- LISA'S SAYING THAT...

SHE DOESN'T LIKE HIM BASED ON...
- WHAT YOU'VE TOLD.

- RIGHT NOW I'M GOING, "I DON'T
KNOW IF IT'S TRUE OR NOT,"

BECAUSE I WANT
TO RESERVE JUDGMENT,

'CAUSE I'VE NEVER SEEN IT
WITH MY OWN EYES.

- BUT WHY ARE THEY TALKING
ABOUT THIS?

- WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

WHAT DID YOU THINK
WAS GONNA HAPPEN?

AND I'M SAYING...
LOOK, ALL I'M SAYING IS

MAYBE THEY HAD A FIGHT
AND IT WAS EXAGGERATED.

AND I DON'T KNOW.
- OVER SIX YEARS?

- I DON'T KNOW.

MY POINT IS, LISTEN...

- BUT YOU SAID TO ME,
"I WILL BACK YOU."

- THIS IS...
- YOU SAID THAT TO ME.

- HOLD ON. NO, YOU ASKED ME...

TAYLOR, DON'T [bleep] WITH ME
LIKE THAT.

I DON'T LIKE THAT, OKAY?
YOU ASKED ME,

AND I SAID, "YES."
THAT'S NOT FAIR.

DON'T DO THAT TO ME.
- WHY IS THIS ABOUT MY MARRIAGE?

'CAUSE THIS WAS SUPPOSED
TO BE ABOUT LISA.

SOMEHOW IT TURNED BACK
TO MY MARRIAGE ONCE AGAIN.

BUT I HAVE NO IDEA
WHY THE OTHER WOMEN

DID NOT OWN IT WHEN
WE STARTED CONFRONTING LISA.

YOU CALLED CAMILLE AND SAID,
"KYLE SAID TODAY

"THAT CAMILLE AND TAYLOR
ARE NOT FRIENDS.

"SO, CAMILLE,
WHAT I NEED YOU TO DO

"IS NOW BACK ME UP TONIGHT...
- NO, NO.

- AND COME TO ME AND SAY
YOU'RE NOT FRIENDS WITH TAYLOR."

- THAT THEY DON'T SEE
EACH OTHER.

- BUT WHY DO YOU NEED
TO HAVE HER BACK IT UP

IF IT'S NOT A LIE?
- OH, FOR GOD'S SAKE.

YOU KNOW WHAT?
- WHY DID YOU PHONE HER

AND ASK HER TO BACK YOU UP?
- WE TALK EVERY COUPLE OF DAYS.

- I DON'T CARE... WHY DID YOU
ASK HER TO BACK YOU UP

ABOUT WHAT YOU SAID TO KYLE?

- I CAN ASK HER THAT.
- BUT WHY?

- BECAUSE SHE SAID THE ONLY TIME

TAYLOR CAME OUT TO SEE ME, SHE...
I MEAN...

- I SAID THAT YOU TALKED
TO ME FOR THREE HOURS,

SAID THAT YOUR HUSBAND
WAS DEFINITELY LEAVING YOU.

AND I FELT LIKE
THAT WHEN YOU HUGGED ME,

YOU SAID, "I'M GETTING
ON A PLANE WITH RUSSELL,

GOING ON A G-4 SOMEWHERE."

AND I WENT,
"WOW, THAT'S SO ODD."

- I FEEL LIKE I HAVE NO IDEA
WHO MY FRIENDS ARE.

I'M SO CONFUSED

AND I-I FEEL IN SHOCK.

EVERYONE'S TALKING BEHIND
EVERYONE'S BACK,

AND LET'S ALL JUST START
BEING HONEST.

SO DON'T CALL HER
AND TALK ABOUT ME.

DON'T CALL HER TO TALK ABOUT ME.
- I DIDN'T...

- AND I WOULD LOVE
TO HAVE YOU AS A FRIEND.

I HOPE YOU CAN BE MY FRIEND.

BUT IF YOU CAN'T, PLEASE DO NOT
TALK ABOUT ME TO ANYONE ELSE.

- OKAY, AND VICE VERSA.

THEY'VE ALL SAID THINGS
TO ME, TOO.

- GREAT.

WELL, I THINK EVERYONE SHOULD
START SAYING WHAT THEY MEAN.

- I THINK WE GOT IT TODAY.

- WELL, I DON'T THINK
WE GOT EVERYTHING, BUT OKAY.

- BUT EVERYTHING, TAYLOR...

I DON'T THINK
YOU WANT EVERYTHING OUT THERE.

YOU SAID, "EVERYTHING."

BE CAREFUL
WHAT YOU SAY IN THERE,

BECAUSE WE'RE ALL
PROTECTING YOU.

Both: WE HAVE ALL PROTECTED YOU.

- ABOUT MY MARRIAGE?

- ABOUT WHAT YOU TOLD US
ABOUT YOUR MARRIAGE.

WHAT YOU TOLD US
ABOUT YOUR MARRIAGE.

WE'VE BEEN PROTECTING YOU,

BECAUSE WE DON'T SAY
THAT HE HITS YOU...

BECAUSE WE DON'T SAY
THAT HE BROKE YOUR JAW

OR THAT HE BEAT YOU UP.
- THREW YOU IN THE BATH.

- AND HE... HE HITS YOU.

WE DON'T SAY THAT,
BUT NOW WE SAID IT.

- NEXT ON THE REAL HOUSEWIVES
OF BEVERLY HILLS...

- YOU HAVE TO BE HONEST.
YOU NEED TO BE HONEST.

THAT'S NOT COOL.

- I'M UPSET BECAUSE THEY'RE
STAYING AT PLANET HOLLYWOOD,

WHICH IS OUR COMPETITION,

AND I DON'T UNDERSTAND
WHY SHE WOULD DO THAT.

IT'S RUDE.

- CAMILLE, IF SHE SHOWED UP,

SHE WOULD BE SHOVELING [bleep],
AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED.

- TO LEARN MORE
ABOUT THE HOUSEWIVES,