The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (2010–…): Season 1, Episode 9 - The Dinner Party from Hell - full transcript
Camille hosts a dinner party to patch things up, but things took a turn for the worst.
- previously on the real
housewives of beverly hills...
- what many of you
may not know
is that I'm a child
of domestic violence.
i want everyone who's
been through that experience
to know that they can
live in beverly hills
just like I do.
[cheers and applause]
- kyle and I left on
an uncomfortable note.
she said, "why would anybody
be interested in you
without kelsey there?"
- I would never
say something like that.
first of all,
I don't think that.
- I don't know why
you just can't cop to it.
- you're such a [bleep] liar,
camille.
[upbeat music]
- it may look like
I have it all
but I want more.
- in beverly hills,
it's who you know,
and I know everyone.
- money is what I have,
not who I am.
- I was a child star,
but now my most important role
is being a mother.
- in a town full of phonies,
i'm not afraid to be me.
- it's time for me
to come out of
my husband's shadow
and shine.
- ken?
- yeah?
- come on, we gotta go.
- you okay to drive?
- yeah.
now I have an american
driving lesson,
so every time I get stopped,
i'm going to have
a much harder time
talking my way out of it.
- why are you going so fast?
- I'm not going fast.
- oh, dear.
- darling, I love you,
but you are probably
one of the worst drivers I know.
- really?
- You are not one to talk.
i have never had
a ticket.
- no, because they can't
catch you.
- [laughs]
in london, we drive
much more aggressively.
in california,
you've got all this space
and everybody drives at, like,
you know, ten miles an hour.
what is this guy's problem?
can you believe that?
[horn honks]
[both laugh]
[horn honks]
- my daughter's on
the dance squad now
and she's eight--
She's busy.
- it goes from them having,
um, like, a lot of free time
and you can be with them
whenever you want,
to then they have
real schedules.
- and take advantage
of that time
that you have now
with your daughter,
you know, 'cause once
they're in school,
you don't see them
as often.
i haven't seen a lot
of the ladies since new york.
taylor's playful,
she's funny,
she seems real.
i trust what she has to say.
she seems genuine.
- would you care for anything
to drink to start off with?
- sure.
i'm gonna try the strawberry,
the first,
the original with vodka.
- and I'll try the mojito.
- Okay.
- so saturday night,
i'm having a dinner
at my house.
- okay.
- I wanted to take a break
from the drama
in new york city.
but I thought it was
really important for me
to reunite us and maybe, uh,
you know,
me opening up my home
to them,
they'll feel more comfortable.
it'll be nice.
and we have a pizza oven,
so what I'm gonna do
is I'm gonna have a chef come.
- that'd be really nice.
and it'll be a completely
different vibe this time.
- um, I think I'm gonna be,
um, cautiously optimistic.
- I like that. All right.
- so we'll see.
it's hard for me
to forgive people anyway.
i'm working through that.
reading my book
of forgiveness.
some of my books.
- Okay.
- and my stack of, like,
self-help books, and, uh...
- and it'll be just
the six of us?
- um, no.
i have a girlfriend
joining me,
and you know the show
medium,
the tv show medium?
- I do.
- well, we produce that show.
- Oh, good.
- and it's the real life story
based on my girlfriend,
allison dubois.
and she's gonna be
my guest.
- she's an actual medium?
- she's an actual medium.
- Oh, okay.
- a real live psychic/medium.
she's fantastic.
and, you know,
when I invite her to anything,
i don't ask her
to read anybody because
that's not why she's coming,
'cause she's my friend.
she's coming
just to be a guest.
- I see. Okay.
- you know, it's interesting
having her around
because she does get
many different hits
on different people
and different things and,
you know, I'll make sure--
I was like, "keep it light."
- yeah, right.
Nothing too heavy.
- nothing too heavy.
you know, you just never know
what's gonna go down.
- mm-mm.
- I just gotta make sure
she doesn't get drunk.
my girlfriend, allison,
does like to drink.
she enjoys a cocktail
and when she has too many,
she may hit
below the belt a bit.
-
adrienne.
- Yes?
i heard.
Bits--sorry.
bits and pieces.
- [sighs]
- what happened with colin?
was he okay?
Did he go, "daddy, I'm sorry?"
i hope you didn't make him
feel bad.
- no, I just--I just said,
"just stop jumping on my back."
- yeah, but kids don't know
the difference--
you were wrestling with him,
right?
- yeah, but don't jump
on someone's face.
- you're so dramatic.
- I mean, he launched his knee
into my nose.
- yeah, like, a four-year-old
did that on purpose.
are you kidding me?
- No, I didn't say that.
adrienne, my nose
was collapsed in.
did you see inside?
Look at--look at my nose.
- I can tell now.
- Hold on. Come here.
- I'm just saying
"are you sure, deanna--"
- look. Look at those splints
inside my nose.
those are big pieces
of silicone.
- I don't really want
to see that.
- adrienne thinks
she's a lot tougher than me.
you know,
she's Miss martial artist
and Miss boxer.
I've never felt pain like that
in my life.
- he's got a great
front kick though.
it was no big deal to me.
roughhousing
is just part of growing up.
- what about a little
neck massage or a little--
- oh, here we go.
- Little tlc tonight.
- oh, my god, you're gonna
milk me for this one.
- I can't breathe though.
[raspy nose breathing]
- my 4-year-old son
was more mature
than my 40-something-year-old
husband.
- where's the little
ziploc bags?
- he didn't do it on purpose.
Let's move on.
- okay.
- Such a baby.
[phone trilling]
- yes, it's camille grammer
for adrienne.
- she's not here right now.
May I take a message?
- yes. Just tell her
that camille called.
i wanted to invite her
to dinner saturday night.
so if she can give me a call,
that would be wonderful.
- I'll give her the message.
[phone trilling]
- hello.
- kim.
- Hi, camille, how are you?
- I wanted to invite you over
for a cocktail party.
- well, all right.
What time?
- um, 7:00.
and I'm going to have--
Um, I'm going to start up
my pizza oven.
i have a chef here.
we're gonna make different
pizzas for appetizers.
and then I'm gonna have
a plated dinner.
- okay.
- tell your sister too.
i left--
I'm gonna call her now.
but if I can't get in touch
with her,
please give her this message,
okay?
- I will. I will.
- Okay. Okay, see you soon. Bye.
[phone trilling]
- hello.
- lisa, it's camille.
How are you?
- can't hear you.
Can you speak up a bit?
- can you hear me now?
- Hold on a second.
- okay.
- Okay, that's better.
- can you hear me?
- What's that again?
- can you hear me?
- No, but I can't hear you.
- is that better?
hey, lisa,
can you hear me now?
it's camille. Hi. Hi.
i wanted to invite you
to my house saturday night.
oh, can you hear me now?
no? It's camille.
oh, my god,
it's her answering machine.
oh, my god.
That is so funny.
that's brilliant.
lisa, that's brilliant.
That's your answering machine.
i totally bought into it.
i thought you weren't--
I thought you couldn't hear me.
- [laughs]
- this should be interesting.
- hello.
- Kyle, it's camille.
- hey, camille.
How are you?
[dog barking]
- fine. Great.
excuse my dog
in the background.
[laughs] um, I was calling
all the girls
'cause I wanted
to invite you over
to dinner at my house
saturday night.
- oh.
i was actually
a little nervous
when she called.
my heart
kind of, like, dropped.
like... [gasps]
uh, this saturday?
- Yeah.
um, I was supposed
to have dinner with my friend.
and let me try
to get out of it.
if I couldn't get out of it,
could she come with me?
i can try to get out of it.
- yeah. I mean, I don't mind
if she--
of course she could come.
- oh, okay.
- I mean,
I have eight people now.
my table--my dinning room table
fits ten.
so I mean, of course.
Of course.
- oh, okay.
- And, like, cocktail attire.
- by myself or with my friend.
- Yeah, that's fine.
but, like, cocktail attire.
Like, look ni--
you know, of course, cocktail.
- Oh, cocktail attire.
- yeah.
- Okay, sounds good.
thanks, camille.
- Okay, you're welcome.
see you then.
i'm happy about putting
together this dinner.
but, um, I hope that I'm making
the right decision.
coming up...
- you know
that show medium on tv?
that's her.
- Patricia arquette plays me.
- oh, gosh, I must watch it.
- did those shoes arrive yet?
- Yeah.
- oh, they arrived.
did he sign them?
- Yeah, he did.
- oh, great.
"to pinky,
love christian louboutin."
fantastic.
looks like I've got
graffiti on the bottom.
never mind.
camille called me,
inviting me for dinner.
i'm, like, a little wary
because of what went down
in new york.
- I would never say something
like that.
first of all,
I don't think that.
you think that.
- you said it to me.
- Get your story straight.
- hopefully
we can be civilized.
and I think it's generous
of her to invite us all
for dinner.
i have to leave you tonight,
you little sex monster.
give me a kiss.
[kissing] give me a kiss.
[kissing]
give me a kiss.
- mom!
- Yes!
- okay, honey,
send her up!
hey, how are you?
- Hi.
how are you?
My hair's wet.
but it might need to be--
i don't know.
Is it wet enough?
- it's perfect.
- It is?
- blow it out
and add some body, right?
- well, I don't know.
I don't know if I want body.
just, like, I mean--
- okay, maybe just
a regular blow
and then we'll decide.
- yeah.
- What's going on? What's new?
- just, um, I'm going
over to camille's tonight.
- really?
how did she sound
when she invited you?
- really nice.
- Not fake?
- no.
She sounded really sweet.
and, like, "oh, yeah."
i felt bad because
I already had plans
with faye that I've had
for, like, two weeks.
i didn't want to cancel.
I've been so busy,
i feel like I've been canceling
so many plans with people.
- yeah,
she's such a sweetheart.
- so I said "do you mind
if I bring my friend?"
and she said, "no,
the more, the merrier,"
which was nice.
- that's great.
- so, um--
- well, she'll fit right in.
- faye resnick
is one of my closest friends.
i share everything that's going
on in my life with her.
i'm sure it's gonna be fine.
but I'm actually happy
that I had plans with faye
because it makes me
feel better.
you know when you're not
expecting something, it just--
- totally got you off guard.
- Yeah.
now it's happened to me
two times.
i'm prepared.
- I'm kind of surprised,
actually,
that you decided
to do this tonight.
but I guess
it's on your own turf.
so you can control it
a little bit more.
- [laughs]
- d.d.'s one
of my closest friends.
and, uh, she wanted to meet
all the girls.
now this closet,
I need somebody to come in here
and organize this for me,
because it's a mess!
- somebody color--
- I love this.
look at this.
That's a screw.
and the back,
it says "you."
- I love that. Maybe you should
wear that tonight.
- no, no.
That's for another night.
- that's for another night.
That's monday night.
this blue dress
is always pretty.
- I wore that already.
- You already wore that.
okay, so that's an outer.
- okay. This: awesome.
- that I love.
you know what,
every since you got that--
- it's a chloe dress.
- I love it.
- and it's lacy,
and it's delicate,
and it's very girly.
the only thing is
it's see-through.
so I'm gonna have to find
the right--
- that's okay.
you have, I'm sure
in your thousands of bra--
- I know. I collect lingerie,
by the way.
i really do.
For me, it's like candy.
but I can prance around
by myself
in front of my mirror in it
and make myself feel good
'cause I'm alone all the time
anyway.
- okay. Well, we feel really bad
for you right now.
- [laughs] okay. Not.
- Not.
- hello, my dear.
- Hi.
- hi, you.
You look gorgeous.
- thank you.
So do you, as always.
- as always.
- so what, we're gonna go
get lisa?
- yeah. It's a long drive.
- she couldn't walk across
the street.
- I know.
- Oh, my gosh.
- hey, you.
- You sexy girl.
- you look lo--lovely.
[kisses]
- hi. How are you?
[dog barking]
- good choice.
- That's beautiful.
- kim, the house is gorgeous.
- Thank you.
- cheers.
- isn't that the exit
for the canyon?
- we're gonna take
the little--the windy road.
- which one was closed?
- I haven't been out there.
- is it on the beach?
oh. [laughs]
- I don't really--
- I don't care if you do,
by the way.
- no, I wouldn't.
i don't do lunch
with camille.
we don't hang out.
my loyalty's to my sister.
- so you're ready
for a cocktail as well?
- oh, I am so ready
for a cocktail.
- I waited until I got here.
- I know. I got your text.
- get yourself all nice
and ready.
- we're prepared.
- Yeah.
- one of the girls
who's going to be there tonight,
the show medium is based
around her.
camille said the more a--
More she drinks,
the more likely she is
to have a--a feeling.
- here. Cheers.
- Cheers.
- here's to old friends
and new friends.
- I know. My new friends
that you'll meet tonight.
- and new friends that may
end up being old friends.
- oh, yes, they're ready.
some of them are out the door
already.
[laughter]
by choice. My choice.
But--
- wow.
- I just want it
to be a fun night.
i don't want any problems
or drama.
i don't want it to be--
i wanted it to be nice
in new york too.
i don't know what happened.
[sighs]
i didn't want faye
to go with a closed mind.
i kept telling her, you know,
"be open-minded.
"i know it's hard because
you know what happened
in new york."
and believe me,
camille's likable.
- but if she's mean to you,
obviously I'm not going
to watch her.
- I don't know.
maybe it was just
two fluke things.
we'll see.
- all I know
is everybody adores you.
you've had your friends
forever.
- adrienne.
- Yes?
- are you prepared?
- there's no way things
are going
to go awry
with adrienne in tow.
- no, I know.
- she might turn out to be
one of your best friends
and I'm gonna be
totally jealous.
- you would not be jeal-y.
- Yes, I would.
- believe me, she's not gonna be
my best friend.
- I'm not above being jealous.
- I will be nice. She's not
gonna be my best friend.
her reality and my reality
are two very different things.
- we still have horses.
Yeah.
we bring our horses here
once in a while.
i might take up riding again.
- you should. Remember how good
your butt was getting too?
- yeah.
Thank you for that.
- she surfs too. You can bounce
a quarter off her ass.
- yeah, here we go.
- oh, look,
your friends are here.
- hi, guys!
- this is stunning. Wow.
- thank you so much
for coming.
mwah. Mwah.
- I can see why you never leave.
It's so gorgeous.
mwah. Mwah.
i haven't seen you
in so long.
- this is allison dubois.
This is lisa.
it's my girlfriend adrienne.
And this is taylor.
[greetings]
and this is one
of my best friends.
- tell me your name?
- Deirdre.
- deirdre. Taylor.
Nice to meet you.
- nice to meet you too.
- Nice to meet you.
- you know that show
medium?
- huh?
- The show medium on tv.
- yeah, I've never seen it.
- That's her. That's her.
that show is about her.
- It's based on her life.
- patricia arquette plays me.
- so you consult on it?
- Yes.
but I have this whole
other life
of actually having a job--
Like doing something real.
i'm profiling serial killers.
- Oh, really?
- but the show
is a nice addition.
it shows people what I do.
- oh, gosh, I must watch it.
- camille had two
of her friends there.
one was her best friend
and one was her sidekick.
i mean, psychic.
- when I go out
into the field,
i have a gun in my holster
on my hip.
- huh. Where is--I bet they've
gone somewhere else.
- we--kim's always late.
- They've chickened out.
they've chickened out.
- hi.
- Hey, kim.
thank you for coming.
- Thank you.
- it's so good to see you.
- Your house is beautiful.
- thank you. Kyle.
- Hi.
how are you?
- Thank you so much for coming.
- thank you for having me.
here's a little something
for having us here.
- thank you.
- Thank you.
when I first got there.
there was, of course,
that initial,
awkward moment again.
here we go again.
but everybody seemed
to be getting along great.
- hey. Camille grammer.
Welcome to my house.
- thank you.
- Thank you for coming.
- very sweet.
- cheers, lisa.
thank you for
taking the drive up.
- you're welcome.
- I know.
Are you gonna be able--?
- looks like I could swim
in this.
the camille cocktail
was like a bowl of soup.
it was huge.
yummy.
and I took a couple
of sips
and it was obviously designed
to kind of blow your socks off.
- these are ginormous.
- Cheers.
- camille, your event on monday,
is everybody going?
- yeah.
- Okay, you're all--
okay, going, going.
and I don't mind coming
to town.
any excuse I can, I will.
- Yeah.
- okay, I think we're going
to make our way
over to the dinning room.
- I hope they're bringing
the pitcher for us.
we're having a girls' night,
right?
[laughs]
- my two guests of honor,
sit here.
but you're all my guests
of honor.
but I'm gonna have d.d.
And allison sit next to me.
and then you guys sit
wherever you want.
- let us chat, and laugh,
and have fun.
- oh, my god.
[all speaking at once]
- [laughs]
- flowers are amazing,
camille.
you did a great job
with the flowers.
cheers.
- it's saturday.
see, I'm still young,
so when saturday hits,
I get all excited.
i'm, like, "yeah.
What are we going to do," right?
and that part of me
still comes out.
and it's a girls' night.
so we're not supposed
to be good.
we're supposed to be
really, really bad
in a controlled setting.
- [laughs nervously]
- coming up...
- And you know how I know her?
i saw her naked in playboy.
i realized, "oh, my god,
that's who it is."
the morally corrupt
faye resnick.
[soft chatter]
- [laughs]
- my angel of mercy.
[laughter]
- I actually sat next
to allison,
who happens to be the medium.
and, of course,
when I first met her,
i thought
she was a little strange.
- the love that they have
after they died
is stronger than anything
we can imagine.
- right.
but I guess if you're talking
to dead people,
you would be.
- I have one big brother.
No sisters.
it's why I like hanging out
with alpha females,
'cause you're kind of
intelligent and pretty.
like, you're alpha.
- I think we should toast
to that.
- alpha females.
- Alpha females.
[all speaking at once]
- cheers to the alphas.
Wait, are we alphas?
we're just assuming.
"oh, thank you.
oh, was that us?"
[laughs]
- I would say everybody here
is an alpha female.
i would say that.
I think that's very cool.
- in their own way.
- and you know what,
here's the thing,
people put alpha females down
so much in our society.
- well, they normally
call them bitches, darling.
- yeah, exactly.
- so now how do you know faye?
And who is faye?
i know--I mean, this is--
I know she looks familiar.
but I don't know
who faye is.
- she's a very close
family friend.
i consider her like a sister.
- Oh, that's nice.
and you know how I know her?
i saw her naked in playboy.
that's how I know faye.
- "oh...faye...
i just realized,"
like she just opened up
a magazine last week
and happened to see it.
- she posed naked in playboy
after the o.j. Trial.
that's her.
- I don't know
if it was a calculated sentence
on camille's part.
i find camille difficult
to read.
but I do know,
as the host of a dinner party,
i wouldn't have said it.
- and I thought you looked
amazing.
- thank you.
- I recognized
during the dinner--
it was the hair.
i think it's the extensions
and the blown up fake lips.
but, um, and then I realized,
"oh, my god, that's who it is.
it's faye resnick."
the morally corrupt
faye resnick.
and I have to say
that I loved your spread.
- literally.
[laughter]
- actually, I didn't spread.
i didn't spread.
- No, you didn't.
- camille...
Didn't you do playboy?
- yes.
- You did.
when did you do playboy?
- Years ago.
that's when I met kelsey.
i didn't do the main--
it's just like a supplement.
i wasn't--I did the, um,
playboy book of lingerie.
- it's clothes.
- what?
- lingerie? I thought
the whole point of playboy
was no lingerie.
- I mean, okay, we got
into this conversation
how I posed for playboy too.
but I was in my early 20s
and wasn't coming off
of a big murder trial
that my girlfriend was killed.
you know, that's just a whole
different--
i can't--those kind of people
I don't understand
and I don't want
to associate with.
- those who live in glass houses
should not throw stones.
and she threw a big boulder.
- they want kyle and I
to do it as sisters.
[laughter]
- eew. Blech.
[laughter continues]
- the, uh, medium next to me
to my left
was really enjoying herself,
because I saw her down, I think,
two or three cocktails.
and these were very strong
cocktails.
i actually took two sips
and I was, like, "wow."
- aah!
- and then allison dubois
pulls out this electronic
cigarette.
i think it's, like, a prop
from some movie or something.
- and she was, like...
[inhales]
[exhales]
and I'm thinking
"that's jack nicholson
from the shining."
that's all I could see
was jack nicholson
in the shining.
[soft chattering]
- allison,
I need to ask you.
do you kind of feel
like people that have passed
are around?
- I definitely make sure
with people who died,
like, if I'm at a dinner
party with y'all,
they got to take a second chair
because you are the ones
that I'm focused on.
but I head tap people too.
So I pull thoughts.
but, like, I'll be able to,
like, tap into somebody
and be, like, "she has
father issues.
"her mother kept
her mouth closed.
"didn't stand up
to the father.
"that's why she has
mother issues.
"and the daddy issues.
daddy was, like,
never there."
and so I start pulling
that information.
- are you head tapping me now?
- No.
- oh, go on.
- I had brought allison
basically as a guest.
and I didn't want her
to feel like she had to perform
for anybody that night.
- don't think I'm doing this
to you ladies
'cause we're having
a girls' night.
and I respect.
- and we respect you
because you want to have your
girls' night too.
exactly.
- can't you do something?
- I think I've been having
a great conversation
with you all.
- no, but I mean,
can't you--
is my grandmother here?
- I mean,
to me it's like a doctor
at a dinner party.
you're always like
"oh, can you tell me
what's wrong with me here?"
so naturally I'm going
to ask her
about her chosen profession.
- I was studied by a scientist
for several years
and on oprah in front
of 70 million people.
i'm kind of like a drug.
once you get one,
you want it again.
- ooh.
- Ooh.
- I'm just--i'm just
putting it out there.
i'm just being honest.
and, you know what,
I hate to say it,
but we're having a girls' night,
so I'm off the clock.
- we're just curious.
- this is why vodka is...
- you didn't eat dinner
so I'm gonna have
to watch you on these.
- oh, yeah, you're gonna have
to watch me.
- did you eat?
- No.
- she's off the clock.
maybe I should whip out
my credit card.
- [chuckles]
- should I do that and say
"how about now?
can I ask you a question now?"
- so, allison, can we just
have one person?
everybody is so excited
about the fact
that you are so gifted.
- don't tempt me. Really.
- ooh.
- who are you looking at
when you say that?
- touche, baby.
- what does that mean:
"don't tempt me"?
- oh, no. No, don't, kyle.
Save yourself.
i'm telling you. I feel this
is not a good situation.
- don't get me started.
- be honest.
Do you really want to go there?
'cause she might pull stuff
that some people want not
want to hear.
- you know, it's best for her
to perform a reading
one-on-one because a lot
of personal stuff comes up.
so if somebody's husband's
cheating on them or something,
she'll know it.
and you just don't--
- I love it.
- do you want to hear that?
No, but do you want to?
- well, couldn't you
just tell us stuff
without telling us
anything scary?
- something that's not scary?
Oh, my god.
but what I want to tell you
might be irritating to you.
- tell me. I don't care.
- just say it. Just say it.
- I don't care.
- okay. Okay.
have you been married twice?
- uh-huh.
- oh.
- well, then that's the last one
you have.
i guess that's good news.
[laughs]
i was thinking she was going
to have to get married again.
which meaning you'd have
a divorce.
- if my husband ever leaves me,
i'm going with him.
- he will never emotionally
fulfill you. Ever. Know that.
as soon as the kids
are bigger,
you'll have nothing
in common.
- okay.
- Oh, my gosh.
here we go.
i was waiting for kyle
to fly across the table.
- I disagree.
- I don't know about that.
- but what I do,
people don't see.
they don't see it.
and then when it happens,
they're, like, "oh, my god."
- no, I understand that.
kyle pushed
for that reading.
allison already had
a few drinks.
kyle pushed for it.
i begged them
not to go there
because I think
it's a personal reading.
- anything else?
- make sure
that you put the walls down
for other females
coming into the life.
i feel like you talk to males
more easily than females.
- that's me.
- I think you're mixing
her up with kyle.
- that's me.
- that's--
Yeah, maybe--I am--
i am much more
a girl's girl.
- I am definitely
more comfortable around men.
- I am too.
- I just don't.
- I feel also women
are very catty to me.
women have always
been really catty.
- they always will be.
They always will be.
- I know that.
So I've always been guarded.
- why?
They don't have to be.
- girls are very catty
with her and insecure.
- in new york--
- maybe that's why
we had an issue.
- oh no, not new york.
- maybe you're more defensive.
and I was--
- Yeah. That could be it.
maybe I felt I had
to be defensive.
- you're offensive.
- any issues that came about
in new york
was no ill--no.
no--I had no ill intentions.
- I think--I guess
it was a misunderstanding.
she knows nothing.
i didn't tell you anything
about that.
- no, you hesitated.
- I just said
"i'm not going
to say anything.
before she got here,
I said "i don't--
i'm not going to say anything"
'cause I don't want it
to feel--
- that's hard for me to believe,
honestly.
the reality--
The reality of it--
and I am like, honest girl
beyond belief.
- that's dismissing
what I'm saying.
- I just say what I feel.
- faye was like a panther
prowling through the jungle.
- by you saying that is saying
that I'm not telling the truth.
- girlfriends tell each other
what's really going on.
kyle tells me
what's happening in her life.
and if you were her good
girlfriend,
you would know what's happening
in her life.
- she kind of said
"oh, I don't believe that
for a second."
i thought, "here we go."
- so you're saying
we're not good girlfriends
because she didn't tell me
what was happening?
- my psychic ability
tells me, "no."
- [gasps]
- coming up...
- you're off
your [bleep] rocker.
- oh, really?
- that is a [bleep] up thing
to say.
- why don't you go blow up
your lips some more?
- enough! Enough!
- so you're saying
we're not good girlfriends
because she didn't tell me
what was happening?
- my psychic ability
tells me, "no."
- if she needs my help,
she will tell me.
she doesn't rely on me.
She can fight her on battles.
if she can't fight
her own battles
and you have to be there,
so be it,
but don't say I'm not there
for camille.
- did you come here
to defend kyle?
'cause the way you're talking
sounds like she cued you in
and you came to defend her.
is that why you came here,
faye, honestly?
- no, I came here to be
with my girlfriend.
- did you come here--
no, I don't think so
at this point.
- I don't do well
with confrontation.
and it was just coming
every direction.
- oh, my god,
that's not true.
- you're used to that.
- all I know is
there was an attack
made on my friend.
- wait a second. Attack?
wait a second. Wait a second.
Wait a second.
did I think it was a setup?
Absolutely.
yeah. I thought faye was there
to be kyle's wingman.
- camille, that's the way
she sees it.
please,
we don't have to go--
- how did I attack you?
i was at the table--
- let's not head backwards,
please.
- faye, you weren't there.
d.d. Was in new york,
so she knows what happened.
- but she doesn't know
the backstory, camille.
- did I attack kyle?
- No.
honestly, I walked in
and all I saw was--
- of course, because,
camille,
you sat there
the entire night like this,
you know, with your hand there
like that.
- but that's who I am,
kyle.
- no, that's not who you are,
camille.
that's who you are pretending
to be.
- she's not pretending
to be that.
that's who she is.
- oh, allison,
i'm not talking to you.
- Oh, but I'm talking to you.
- I'm not talking to you.
- But I'm talking to you.
- 'scuse me,
you're boring me.
- allison was standing up
for me.
and I--listen, I'm glad
because she's--
out of all the girls
that are there,
she's the only one
that stood up for me.
- camille, I was having
a conversation with you.
- you are entirely washed up.
Enjoy your life.
- I came here bringing allison
'cause allison's
for interesting conversation.
it was
for interesting conversation--
- we're not allowed
to talk to her about it
'cause she's now
"off the clock."
- you're not hiring me.
I'm a dinner guest.
i was being polite.
when y'all were irritating me,
I appeased you.
be clear on that.
i have books written on me
and by me
and had television shows
based on my life.
so you can just, like,
take a flying leap.
- I think the psychic
was way more provocative
than anybody at the table.
she's not a psychic
that I would feel,
oh, yeah, I'm going
to open my heart to.
no. Absolutely not.
she--yeah, she definitely
was starting to piss me off.
- you are. You are.
- I'm so bored
with this conversation.
- then leave.
- I'm totally over it.
- then leave.
If you're over it, then leave.
walk. You've got two legs
the last time we checked.
- ooh.
- [Gasps]
is that what you do
is just attack people?
and then when they get real,
you just, like, become even--
- that is so rich
coming from somebody
that came here
to stir up [bleep].
- allison, you've been
sitting here
with a weird attitude
all night.
- a weird attitude all night?
Wow.
then why were you talking
to me so much?
- I was curious about you.
- well, you know what,
you are not interesting to me
at all.
- well, you're not
to met either.
- so you continue
being interested by me.
that's awesome.
You have two legs too.
they can walk.
- Eew.
what is this?
This what she does?
is this what you do?
- I felt that it started out
positive
and it went down in flames.
- oh, this is ridiculous.
- I just felt like it wasn't
really worth my time
to get involved
with this petty nonsense.
[all speaking at once]
- allison, all I care--
let me tell you something
right now.
all of this is unimportant
to me.
i have four beautiful
children.
look how she turns
her head like this.
what, are we
in elementary school?
- allison was...
[inhales]
[whispers]
puffing away.
- I had also heard
that things were said
at the airport.
- and that's when I came to you
and I said
to you, "where did this
all come from?"
and you said, "taylor,
you were telling me--"
- I wasn't telling you anything.
You were baiting me.
- I wasn't baiting.
- You were 100% baiting me.
i wasn't there.
- all of the sudden,
i hear kim and taylor
fighting again.
what is this? Contagious?
i saw you--
- Please.
do me a favor and don't.
[all arguing]
- this is all [bleep] to me,
okay?
- I feel like the dinner table
was just a swirling tornado.
you need to stand up
and say, "stop."
- why don't you stand up
and say "stop"?
- I can't stop you,
because you're off
your [bleep] rocker.
- oh, really?
- That's the problem with you.
- oh, that's what
I think about you.
- okay, enough.
Girls, enough. Enough.
enough! Enough!
Enough. Enough.
we're not doing this anymore.
i'm not having this anymore.
Enough.
get up.
these are not the ladies
that we are. Enough.
- I don't get it.
I've never had a problem
like this
with a woman in my life.
i don't get it.
- I don't have a problem
with you, kyle.
that's the whole thing.
I--I just...
well, after new york,
I kind of felt bad.
you did call me
a delusional bitch.
there's got to be something else
going on with her
that maybe she doesn't even
know or realize.
i honestly think
it's jealousy.
i think there's some kind
of jealousy there.
i mean, I hate to say that.
I hate saying that.
but I think that it's a big part
of this.
camille, if someone says
to you
"is kelsey going with you
to hawaii?"
and you say "no"
and then you hear
"who wants you without kelsey?"
then that's delusional.
- that is a [bleep] up thing
to say.
that's a [bleep] up thing
to say.
- we can't go
down that road again.
- she's can't say
what camille thought.
she doesn't know that.
She's not camille.
- I'm not talking to you,
allison.
- oh, you are 'cause you're
looking at me.
- get over it. Go. Whatever.
smoke your electronic cigarette
and drink your martini.
i'm talking to camille.
- you said that.
- No. No, you heard that.
you heard that.
- You said that.
if she says you said that,
you said that.
- oh, really?
- you save your stories
and you tweak them.
- no you just lost
all credibility.
- all right.
- All credibility.
- I could give a [bleep]
with you, really.
- it's one thing for us
if we're dealing
with a situation.
- I could give a [bleep].
- you as a psychic says
"oh, you said that
because camille said so."
oh, that's very profound.
- you're nothing.
- You're done.
- you've done nothing.
You're nothing.
- allison, that's okay.
- You've done nothing.
- oh, come on, allison.
That's enough.
- you've done nothing.
- Allison, shh.
- you know what?
Let's go.
- such a bitch.
- Let's go, guys.
come on. Come on. Please.
- my dad said, "live life large
and make no apologies
for who you are."
[bleep] them.
- Allison--
- I don't give a [bleep]
what she thinks about me.
she can [bleep] off.
i can--I can tell you
when she will die
and what will happen
to her family.
i love that about me.
- I--i'm really upset
with the way you--
- no, I'm upset with you.
- I'm upset with you.
taylor and I just--
when there's conflict,
just seem to, like,
look at each other
and it's, like, "meow."
- she's stressing me out
so badly.
- me too. That's how it started
tonight.
- ugh.
- thank you for having us.
Um--oh, god.
- watch--watch your step.
- but she's got to fight
with somebody.
so it's gonna be me,
I guess.
- we already have something
going on with camille.
and then you guys start--
I don't understand this.
- she brought up the word
"insecure"
and she said--
and you said you brought it up
in the airport.
- if I'm already having
a problem with camille,
and there's already problems
and fighting,
why do you bring that up?
- I didn't bring it up.
- in new york, you did.
- oh, my god.
- we're having
a horrible night.
we're having
all this fighting.
all of the sudden,
you decide
to attack taylor out
of the blue.
this is just adding fuel
to the fire.
put your gasoline
and matches away.
flippin' haunted house
at disneyland.
i just want
to get out of here.
i cannot deal
with this crap.
- I mean, it was a few clowns
short of a circus.
- coming up...
- do I have any intentions
of being their friends?
no.
- Their friends?
they can't even
spell "friends."
so that'd be a negative.
- kyle's a little bitch.
she's a little bitch.
She is.
she's the ringleader.
she's all, "yap, yap,
yap, yap, yap."
kyle was every girl
at a high school
that made somebody kill
themselves.
she's that chick.
she's that--
No, she's that girl
that's so mean
and profoundly bankrupt--
- yeah, no, I think
she's morally bankrupt.
- I almost shoved this
up her [bleep] ass
just to prove a point.
except I think she'd need
a bigger one than this
to even feel it.
- oh.
- Oh, yeah, I went there.
- [laughs] you don't want
to go there anymore.
- girl, bitch is a one-syllable
word for a reason.
it's all they understand.
- you started this!
- What?
- wait!
Now she's--
- new york was worse.
- let me just say this,
okay?
- yeah.
- It may seem like a--
- the sprinkler's coming on.
- Oh, [bleep].
- did she turn them on?
Did she turn them on?
- the psychic turned them on.
[laughter]
- so weird.
The whole situation.
- it was just a disaster.
i actually right now
don't know
that those two can ever be
in the same room again.
- kyle set that up
because kyle brought faye.
- kyle is a conspirator.
- Yeah, I noticed that too.
- know that.
- she came into my home
and verbally assaulted me.
um, you know,
fool me once, shame on--
you know--how's it?
- we're the only sane people
in here.
you and I need to stick
together, okay?
- we're gonna ride in one car
and you can take this car
because I can't--
I don't want to go
out of the way
and this and that.
i just want to get home now.
- oh, that's good,
all you ride together
and talk about--
- I'm sorry, but you're
neighbors with camille.
- can I just say this?
if any of their children
disappeared,
they wouldn't be, like,
"you were wrong."
they'd be, like,
"can you help--"
[bleep] them.
- I need a drink!
- that was horrifying.
- Horrible.
- did you not feel like
you were in the house of horrors
between the person
serving the drinks--
and "would you like
a drink?"--
to the girl with the...
[sucking]
- and the bad decor.
- with the electronic cigarette.
- kyle's an angry bitch.
She just is.
it's all she will be.
Know that.
she isn't happy with her life.
- I think you're more on
to her personal life
with her husband
than she wants to accept
and she was even willing
to accept it.
- he loves his nannies.
You can't fault him.
she's an icy bitch.
- he loves more
than his nannies.
- oh, you guys.
- I just--but--
[laughter]
he love women in general.
Let's just say that.
let's be nice.
i'm not saying
he's cheating on her.
- girl, I didn't say
you said that at all.
- I just know that he really
loves women.
- they all left
and went in one car
and left me to go home
by myself.
[phone trilling]
- I missed the part of...
- Kim.
- what she said about you
and lisa.
[phone trilling]
- boy, they all sure
love each other, don't they?
- no. It's because it's easy
to pick on me
because I'm the nice guy.
but if I was out
of the situation,
they would tear
each other apart.
[cell phone rings]
- well, that girl--
That woman was very strange.
- that allison was disgusting.
- She was very strange.
- I felt like I was in
the house of horrors.
- but, honestly,
I would--I would've thought
they would've been
a lot classier.
- them? You thought
they'd be classier.
- no, I agree.
- No, it is a slight against me.
- I thought taylor
was your friend.
but she's not your friend.
- she's a sacrificial lamb.
That's not okay.
- no, she's not your friend.
- who wants to go to the beverly
hills hotel and polo lounge?
- I do!
- Yoo-hoo!
[phone trilling]
- I was really frustrated
with kim
because she did not
have my back
and she knew that.
polo lounge.
- Yes.
- polo lounge!
- do I have any intentions
of being their friends? No.
- their friends?
they can't even
spell "friends."
so that'd be a negative.
- camille, she's mean.
she seems sweet,
but she's like one of those
cheerleaders in high school
that--rrr--
Rip your--yeah--your heart out.
[phone trilling]
- next time on the real
housewives of beverly hills...
[applause]
- uh-oh, what's going on?
- then she said
"we won't be doing business
with your husband anymore."
[cheers]
- check out those guns.
- ah.
- camille and kyle,
i don't think
there's a smooth road ahead.
- to learn more
about the housewives,
housewives of beverly hills...
- what many of you
may not know
is that I'm a child
of domestic violence.
i want everyone who's
been through that experience
to know that they can
live in beverly hills
just like I do.
[cheers and applause]
- kyle and I left on
an uncomfortable note.
she said, "why would anybody
be interested in you
without kelsey there?"
- I would never
say something like that.
first of all,
I don't think that.
- I don't know why
you just can't cop to it.
- you're such a [bleep] liar,
camille.
[upbeat music]
- it may look like
I have it all
but I want more.
- in beverly hills,
it's who you know,
and I know everyone.
- money is what I have,
not who I am.
- I was a child star,
but now my most important role
is being a mother.
- in a town full of phonies,
i'm not afraid to be me.
- it's time for me
to come out of
my husband's shadow
and shine.
- ken?
- yeah?
- come on, we gotta go.
- you okay to drive?
- yeah.
now I have an american
driving lesson,
so every time I get stopped,
i'm going to have
a much harder time
talking my way out of it.
- why are you going so fast?
- I'm not going fast.
- oh, dear.
- darling, I love you,
but you are probably
one of the worst drivers I know.
- really?
- You are not one to talk.
i have never had
a ticket.
- no, because they can't
catch you.
- [laughs]
in london, we drive
much more aggressively.
in california,
you've got all this space
and everybody drives at, like,
you know, ten miles an hour.
what is this guy's problem?
can you believe that?
[horn honks]
[both laugh]
[horn honks]
- my daughter's on
the dance squad now
and she's eight--
She's busy.
- it goes from them having,
um, like, a lot of free time
and you can be with them
whenever you want,
to then they have
real schedules.
- and take advantage
of that time
that you have now
with your daughter,
you know, 'cause once
they're in school,
you don't see them
as often.
i haven't seen a lot
of the ladies since new york.
taylor's playful,
she's funny,
she seems real.
i trust what she has to say.
she seems genuine.
- would you care for anything
to drink to start off with?
- sure.
i'm gonna try the strawberry,
the first,
the original with vodka.
- and I'll try the mojito.
- Okay.
- so saturday night,
i'm having a dinner
at my house.
- okay.
- I wanted to take a break
from the drama
in new york city.
but I thought it was
really important for me
to reunite us and maybe, uh,
you know,
me opening up my home
to them,
they'll feel more comfortable.
it'll be nice.
and we have a pizza oven,
so what I'm gonna do
is I'm gonna have a chef come.
- that'd be really nice.
and it'll be a completely
different vibe this time.
- um, I think I'm gonna be,
um, cautiously optimistic.
- I like that. All right.
- so we'll see.
it's hard for me
to forgive people anyway.
i'm working through that.
reading my book
of forgiveness.
some of my books.
- Okay.
- and my stack of, like,
self-help books, and, uh...
- and it'll be just
the six of us?
- um, no.
i have a girlfriend
joining me,
and you know the show
medium,
the tv show medium?
- I do.
- well, we produce that show.
- Oh, good.
- and it's the real life story
based on my girlfriend,
allison dubois.
and she's gonna be
my guest.
- she's an actual medium?
- she's an actual medium.
- Oh, okay.
- a real live psychic/medium.
she's fantastic.
and, you know,
when I invite her to anything,
i don't ask her
to read anybody because
that's not why she's coming,
'cause she's my friend.
she's coming
just to be a guest.
- I see. Okay.
- you know, it's interesting
having her around
because she does get
many different hits
on different people
and different things and,
you know, I'll make sure--
I was like, "keep it light."
- yeah, right.
Nothing too heavy.
- nothing too heavy.
you know, you just never know
what's gonna go down.
- mm-mm.
- I just gotta make sure
she doesn't get drunk.
my girlfriend, allison,
does like to drink.
she enjoys a cocktail
and when she has too many,
she may hit
below the belt a bit.
-
adrienne.
- Yes?
i heard.
Bits--sorry.
bits and pieces.
- [sighs]
- what happened with colin?
was he okay?
Did he go, "daddy, I'm sorry?"
i hope you didn't make him
feel bad.
- no, I just--I just said,
"just stop jumping on my back."
- yeah, but kids don't know
the difference--
you were wrestling with him,
right?
- yeah, but don't jump
on someone's face.
- you're so dramatic.
- I mean, he launched his knee
into my nose.
- yeah, like, a four-year-old
did that on purpose.
are you kidding me?
- No, I didn't say that.
adrienne, my nose
was collapsed in.
did you see inside?
Look at--look at my nose.
- I can tell now.
- Hold on. Come here.
- I'm just saying
"are you sure, deanna--"
- look. Look at those splints
inside my nose.
those are big pieces
of silicone.
- I don't really want
to see that.
- adrienne thinks
she's a lot tougher than me.
you know,
she's Miss martial artist
and Miss boxer.
I've never felt pain like that
in my life.
- he's got a great
front kick though.
it was no big deal to me.
roughhousing
is just part of growing up.
- what about a little
neck massage or a little--
- oh, here we go.
- Little tlc tonight.
- oh, my god, you're gonna
milk me for this one.
- I can't breathe though.
[raspy nose breathing]
- my 4-year-old son
was more mature
than my 40-something-year-old
husband.
- where's the little
ziploc bags?
- he didn't do it on purpose.
Let's move on.
- okay.
- Such a baby.
[phone trilling]
- yes, it's camille grammer
for adrienne.
- she's not here right now.
May I take a message?
- yes. Just tell her
that camille called.
i wanted to invite her
to dinner saturday night.
so if she can give me a call,
that would be wonderful.
- I'll give her the message.
[phone trilling]
- hello.
- kim.
- Hi, camille, how are you?
- I wanted to invite you over
for a cocktail party.
- well, all right.
What time?
- um, 7:00.
and I'm going to have--
Um, I'm going to start up
my pizza oven.
i have a chef here.
we're gonna make different
pizzas for appetizers.
and then I'm gonna have
a plated dinner.
- okay.
- tell your sister too.
i left--
I'm gonna call her now.
but if I can't get in touch
with her,
please give her this message,
okay?
- I will. I will.
- Okay. Okay, see you soon. Bye.
[phone trilling]
- hello.
- lisa, it's camille.
How are you?
- can't hear you.
Can you speak up a bit?
- can you hear me now?
- Hold on a second.
- okay.
- Okay, that's better.
- can you hear me?
- What's that again?
- can you hear me?
- No, but I can't hear you.
- is that better?
hey, lisa,
can you hear me now?
it's camille. Hi. Hi.
i wanted to invite you
to my house saturday night.
oh, can you hear me now?
no? It's camille.
oh, my god,
it's her answering machine.
oh, my god.
That is so funny.
that's brilliant.
lisa, that's brilliant.
That's your answering machine.
i totally bought into it.
i thought you weren't--
I thought you couldn't hear me.
- [laughs]
- this should be interesting.
- hello.
- Kyle, it's camille.
- hey, camille.
How are you?
[dog barking]
- fine. Great.
excuse my dog
in the background.
[laughs] um, I was calling
all the girls
'cause I wanted
to invite you over
to dinner at my house
saturday night.
- oh.
i was actually
a little nervous
when she called.
my heart
kind of, like, dropped.
like... [gasps]
uh, this saturday?
- Yeah.
um, I was supposed
to have dinner with my friend.
and let me try
to get out of it.
if I couldn't get out of it,
could she come with me?
i can try to get out of it.
- yeah. I mean, I don't mind
if she--
of course she could come.
- oh, okay.
- I mean,
I have eight people now.
my table--my dinning room table
fits ten.
so I mean, of course.
Of course.
- oh, okay.
- And, like, cocktail attire.
- by myself or with my friend.
- Yeah, that's fine.
but, like, cocktail attire.
Like, look ni--
you know, of course, cocktail.
- Oh, cocktail attire.
- yeah.
- Okay, sounds good.
thanks, camille.
- Okay, you're welcome.
see you then.
i'm happy about putting
together this dinner.
but, um, I hope that I'm making
the right decision.
coming up...
- you know
that show medium on tv?
that's her.
- Patricia arquette plays me.
- oh, gosh, I must watch it.
- did those shoes arrive yet?
- Yeah.
- oh, they arrived.
did he sign them?
- Yeah, he did.
- oh, great.
"to pinky,
love christian louboutin."
fantastic.
looks like I've got
graffiti on the bottom.
never mind.
camille called me,
inviting me for dinner.
i'm, like, a little wary
because of what went down
in new york.
- I would never say something
like that.
first of all,
I don't think that.
you think that.
- you said it to me.
- Get your story straight.
- hopefully
we can be civilized.
and I think it's generous
of her to invite us all
for dinner.
i have to leave you tonight,
you little sex monster.
give me a kiss.
[kissing] give me a kiss.
[kissing]
give me a kiss.
- mom!
- Yes!
- okay, honey,
send her up!
hey, how are you?
- Hi.
how are you?
My hair's wet.
but it might need to be--
i don't know.
Is it wet enough?
- it's perfect.
- It is?
- blow it out
and add some body, right?
- well, I don't know.
I don't know if I want body.
just, like, I mean--
- okay, maybe just
a regular blow
and then we'll decide.
- yeah.
- What's going on? What's new?
- just, um, I'm going
over to camille's tonight.
- really?
how did she sound
when she invited you?
- really nice.
- Not fake?
- no.
She sounded really sweet.
and, like, "oh, yeah."
i felt bad because
I already had plans
with faye that I've had
for, like, two weeks.
i didn't want to cancel.
I've been so busy,
i feel like I've been canceling
so many plans with people.
- yeah,
she's such a sweetheart.
- so I said "do you mind
if I bring my friend?"
and she said, "no,
the more, the merrier,"
which was nice.
- that's great.
- so, um--
- well, she'll fit right in.
- faye resnick
is one of my closest friends.
i share everything that's going
on in my life with her.
i'm sure it's gonna be fine.
but I'm actually happy
that I had plans with faye
because it makes me
feel better.
you know when you're not
expecting something, it just--
- totally got you off guard.
- Yeah.
now it's happened to me
two times.
i'm prepared.
- I'm kind of surprised,
actually,
that you decided
to do this tonight.
but I guess
it's on your own turf.
so you can control it
a little bit more.
- [laughs]
- d.d.'s one
of my closest friends.
and, uh, she wanted to meet
all the girls.
now this closet,
I need somebody to come in here
and organize this for me,
because it's a mess!
- somebody color--
- I love this.
look at this.
That's a screw.
and the back,
it says "you."
- I love that. Maybe you should
wear that tonight.
- no, no.
That's for another night.
- that's for another night.
That's monday night.
this blue dress
is always pretty.
- I wore that already.
- You already wore that.
okay, so that's an outer.
- okay. This: awesome.
- that I love.
you know what,
every since you got that--
- it's a chloe dress.
- I love it.
- and it's lacy,
and it's delicate,
and it's very girly.
the only thing is
it's see-through.
so I'm gonna have to find
the right--
- that's okay.
you have, I'm sure
in your thousands of bra--
- I know. I collect lingerie,
by the way.
i really do.
For me, it's like candy.
but I can prance around
by myself
in front of my mirror in it
and make myself feel good
'cause I'm alone all the time
anyway.
- okay. Well, we feel really bad
for you right now.
- [laughs] okay. Not.
- Not.
- hello, my dear.
- Hi.
- hi, you.
You look gorgeous.
- thank you.
So do you, as always.
- as always.
- so what, we're gonna go
get lisa?
- yeah. It's a long drive.
- she couldn't walk across
the street.
- I know.
- Oh, my gosh.
- hey, you.
- You sexy girl.
- you look lo--lovely.
[kisses]
- hi. How are you?
[dog barking]
- good choice.
- That's beautiful.
- kim, the house is gorgeous.
- Thank you.
- cheers.
- isn't that the exit
for the canyon?
- we're gonna take
the little--the windy road.
- which one was closed?
- I haven't been out there.
- is it on the beach?
oh. [laughs]
- I don't really--
- I don't care if you do,
by the way.
- no, I wouldn't.
i don't do lunch
with camille.
we don't hang out.
my loyalty's to my sister.
- so you're ready
for a cocktail as well?
- oh, I am so ready
for a cocktail.
- I waited until I got here.
- I know. I got your text.
- get yourself all nice
and ready.
- we're prepared.
- Yeah.
- one of the girls
who's going to be there tonight,
the show medium is based
around her.
camille said the more a--
More she drinks,
the more likely she is
to have a--a feeling.
- here. Cheers.
- Cheers.
- here's to old friends
and new friends.
- I know. My new friends
that you'll meet tonight.
- and new friends that may
end up being old friends.
- oh, yes, they're ready.
some of them are out the door
already.
[laughter]
by choice. My choice.
But--
- wow.
- I just want it
to be a fun night.
i don't want any problems
or drama.
i don't want it to be--
i wanted it to be nice
in new york too.
i don't know what happened.
[sighs]
i didn't want faye
to go with a closed mind.
i kept telling her, you know,
"be open-minded.
"i know it's hard because
you know what happened
in new york."
and believe me,
camille's likable.
- but if she's mean to you,
obviously I'm not going
to watch her.
- I don't know.
maybe it was just
two fluke things.
we'll see.
- all I know
is everybody adores you.
you've had your friends
forever.
- adrienne.
- Yes?
- are you prepared?
- there's no way things
are going
to go awry
with adrienne in tow.
- no, I know.
- she might turn out to be
one of your best friends
and I'm gonna be
totally jealous.
- you would not be jeal-y.
- Yes, I would.
- believe me, she's not gonna be
my best friend.
- I'm not above being jealous.
- I will be nice. She's not
gonna be my best friend.
her reality and my reality
are two very different things.
- we still have horses.
Yeah.
we bring our horses here
once in a while.
i might take up riding again.
- you should. Remember how good
your butt was getting too?
- yeah.
Thank you for that.
- she surfs too. You can bounce
a quarter off her ass.
- yeah, here we go.
- oh, look,
your friends are here.
- hi, guys!
- this is stunning. Wow.
- thank you so much
for coming.
mwah. Mwah.
- I can see why you never leave.
It's so gorgeous.
mwah. Mwah.
i haven't seen you
in so long.
- this is allison dubois.
This is lisa.
it's my girlfriend adrienne.
And this is taylor.
[greetings]
and this is one
of my best friends.
- tell me your name?
- Deirdre.
- deirdre. Taylor.
Nice to meet you.
- nice to meet you too.
- Nice to meet you.
- you know that show
medium?
- huh?
- The show medium on tv.
- yeah, I've never seen it.
- That's her. That's her.
that show is about her.
- It's based on her life.
- patricia arquette plays me.
- so you consult on it?
- Yes.
but I have this whole
other life
of actually having a job--
Like doing something real.
i'm profiling serial killers.
- Oh, really?
- but the show
is a nice addition.
it shows people what I do.
- oh, gosh, I must watch it.
- camille had two
of her friends there.
one was her best friend
and one was her sidekick.
i mean, psychic.
- when I go out
into the field,
i have a gun in my holster
on my hip.
- huh. Where is--I bet they've
gone somewhere else.
- we--kim's always late.
- They've chickened out.
they've chickened out.
- hi.
- Hey, kim.
thank you for coming.
- Thank you.
- it's so good to see you.
- Your house is beautiful.
- thank you. Kyle.
- Hi.
how are you?
- Thank you so much for coming.
- thank you for having me.
here's a little something
for having us here.
- thank you.
- Thank you.
when I first got there.
there was, of course,
that initial,
awkward moment again.
here we go again.
but everybody seemed
to be getting along great.
- hey. Camille grammer.
Welcome to my house.
- thank you.
- Thank you for coming.
- very sweet.
- cheers, lisa.
thank you for
taking the drive up.
- you're welcome.
- I know.
Are you gonna be able--?
- looks like I could swim
in this.
the camille cocktail
was like a bowl of soup.
it was huge.
yummy.
and I took a couple
of sips
and it was obviously designed
to kind of blow your socks off.
- these are ginormous.
- Cheers.
- camille, your event on monday,
is everybody going?
- yeah.
- Okay, you're all--
okay, going, going.
and I don't mind coming
to town.
any excuse I can, I will.
- Yeah.
- okay, I think we're going
to make our way
over to the dinning room.
- I hope they're bringing
the pitcher for us.
we're having a girls' night,
right?
[laughs]
- my two guests of honor,
sit here.
but you're all my guests
of honor.
but I'm gonna have d.d.
And allison sit next to me.
and then you guys sit
wherever you want.
- let us chat, and laugh,
and have fun.
- oh, my god.
[all speaking at once]
- [laughs]
- flowers are amazing,
camille.
you did a great job
with the flowers.
cheers.
- it's saturday.
see, I'm still young,
so when saturday hits,
I get all excited.
i'm, like, "yeah.
What are we going to do," right?
and that part of me
still comes out.
and it's a girls' night.
so we're not supposed
to be good.
we're supposed to be
really, really bad
in a controlled setting.
- [laughs nervously]
- coming up...
- And you know how I know her?
i saw her naked in playboy.
i realized, "oh, my god,
that's who it is."
the morally corrupt
faye resnick.
[soft chatter]
- [laughs]
- my angel of mercy.
[laughter]
- I actually sat next
to allison,
who happens to be the medium.
and, of course,
when I first met her,
i thought
she was a little strange.
- the love that they have
after they died
is stronger than anything
we can imagine.
- right.
but I guess if you're talking
to dead people,
you would be.
- I have one big brother.
No sisters.
it's why I like hanging out
with alpha females,
'cause you're kind of
intelligent and pretty.
like, you're alpha.
- I think we should toast
to that.
- alpha females.
- Alpha females.
[all speaking at once]
- cheers to the alphas.
Wait, are we alphas?
we're just assuming.
"oh, thank you.
oh, was that us?"
[laughs]
- I would say everybody here
is an alpha female.
i would say that.
I think that's very cool.
- in their own way.
- and you know what,
here's the thing,
people put alpha females down
so much in our society.
- well, they normally
call them bitches, darling.
- yeah, exactly.
- so now how do you know faye?
And who is faye?
i know--I mean, this is--
I know she looks familiar.
but I don't know
who faye is.
- she's a very close
family friend.
i consider her like a sister.
- Oh, that's nice.
and you know how I know her?
i saw her naked in playboy.
that's how I know faye.
- "oh...faye...
i just realized,"
like she just opened up
a magazine last week
and happened to see it.
- she posed naked in playboy
after the o.j. Trial.
that's her.
- I don't know
if it was a calculated sentence
on camille's part.
i find camille difficult
to read.
but I do know,
as the host of a dinner party,
i wouldn't have said it.
- and I thought you looked
amazing.
- thank you.
- I recognized
during the dinner--
it was the hair.
i think it's the extensions
and the blown up fake lips.
but, um, and then I realized,
"oh, my god, that's who it is.
it's faye resnick."
the morally corrupt
faye resnick.
and I have to say
that I loved your spread.
- literally.
[laughter]
- actually, I didn't spread.
i didn't spread.
- No, you didn't.
- camille...
Didn't you do playboy?
- yes.
- You did.
when did you do playboy?
- Years ago.
that's when I met kelsey.
i didn't do the main--
it's just like a supplement.
i wasn't--I did the, um,
playboy book of lingerie.
- it's clothes.
- what?
- lingerie? I thought
the whole point of playboy
was no lingerie.
- I mean, okay, we got
into this conversation
how I posed for playboy too.
but I was in my early 20s
and wasn't coming off
of a big murder trial
that my girlfriend was killed.
you know, that's just a whole
different--
i can't--those kind of people
I don't understand
and I don't want
to associate with.
- those who live in glass houses
should not throw stones.
and she threw a big boulder.
- they want kyle and I
to do it as sisters.
[laughter]
- eew. Blech.
[laughter continues]
- the, uh, medium next to me
to my left
was really enjoying herself,
because I saw her down, I think,
two or three cocktails.
and these were very strong
cocktails.
i actually took two sips
and I was, like, "wow."
- aah!
- and then allison dubois
pulls out this electronic
cigarette.
i think it's, like, a prop
from some movie or something.
- and she was, like...
[inhales]
[exhales]
and I'm thinking
"that's jack nicholson
from the shining."
that's all I could see
was jack nicholson
in the shining.
[soft chattering]
- allison,
I need to ask you.
do you kind of feel
like people that have passed
are around?
- I definitely make sure
with people who died,
like, if I'm at a dinner
party with y'all,
they got to take a second chair
because you are the ones
that I'm focused on.
but I head tap people too.
So I pull thoughts.
but, like, I'll be able to,
like, tap into somebody
and be, like, "she has
father issues.
"her mother kept
her mouth closed.
"didn't stand up
to the father.
"that's why she has
mother issues.
"and the daddy issues.
daddy was, like,
never there."
and so I start pulling
that information.
- are you head tapping me now?
- No.
- oh, go on.
- I had brought allison
basically as a guest.
and I didn't want her
to feel like she had to perform
for anybody that night.
- don't think I'm doing this
to you ladies
'cause we're having
a girls' night.
and I respect.
- and we respect you
because you want to have your
girls' night too.
exactly.
- can't you do something?
- I think I've been having
a great conversation
with you all.
- no, but I mean,
can't you--
is my grandmother here?
- I mean,
to me it's like a doctor
at a dinner party.
you're always like
"oh, can you tell me
what's wrong with me here?"
so naturally I'm going
to ask her
about her chosen profession.
- I was studied by a scientist
for several years
and on oprah in front
of 70 million people.
i'm kind of like a drug.
once you get one,
you want it again.
- ooh.
- Ooh.
- I'm just--i'm just
putting it out there.
i'm just being honest.
and, you know what,
I hate to say it,
but we're having a girls' night,
so I'm off the clock.
- we're just curious.
- this is why vodka is...
- you didn't eat dinner
so I'm gonna have
to watch you on these.
- oh, yeah, you're gonna have
to watch me.
- did you eat?
- No.
- she's off the clock.
maybe I should whip out
my credit card.
- [chuckles]
- should I do that and say
"how about now?
can I ask you a question now?"
- so, allison, can we just
have one person?
everybody is so excited
about the fact
that you are so gifted.
- don't tempt me. Really.
- ooh.
- who are you looking at
when you say that?
- touche, baby.
- what does that mean:
"don't tempt me"?
- oh, no. No, don't, kyle.
Save yourself.
i'm telling you. I feel this
is not a good situation.
- don't get me started.
- be honest.
Do you really want to go there?
'cause she might pull stuff
that some people want not
want to hear.
- you know, it's best for her
to perform a reading
one-on-one because a lot
of personal stuff comes up.
so if somebody's husband's
cheating on them or something,
she'll know it.
and you just don't--
- I love it.
- do you want to hear that?
No, but do you want to?
- well, couldn't you
just tell us stuff
without telling us
anything scary?
- something that's not scary?
Oh, my god.
but what I want to tell you
might be irritating to you.
- tell me. I don't care.
- just say it. Just say it.
- I don't care.
- okay. Okay.
have you been married twice?
- uh-huh.
- oh.
- well, then that's the last one
you have.
i guess that's good news.
[laughs]
i was thinking she was going
to have to get married again.
which meaning you'd have
a divorce.
- if my husband ever leaves me,
i'm going with him.
- he will never emotionally
fulfill you. Ever. Know that.
as soon as the kids
are bigger,
you'll have nothing
in common.
- okay.
- Oh, my gosh.
here we go.
i was waiting for kyle
to fly across the table.
- I disagree.
- I don't know about that.
- but what I do,
people don't see.
they don't see it.
and then when it happens,
they're, like, "oh, my god."
- no, I understand that.
kyle pushed
for that reading.
allison already had
a few drinks.
kyle pushed for it.
i begged them
not to go there
because I think
it's a personal reading.
- anything else?
- make sure
that you put the walls down
for other females
coming into the life.
i feel like you talk to males
more easily than females.
- that's me.
- I think you're mixing
her up with kyle.
- that's me.
- that's--
Yeah, maybe--I am--
i am much more
a girl's girl.
- I am definitely
more comfortable around men.
- I am too.
- I just don't.
- I feel also women
are very catty to me.
women have always
been really catty.
- they always will be.
They always will be.
- I know that.
So I've always been guarded.
- why?
They don't have to be.
- girls are very catty
with her and insecure.
- in new york--
- maybe that's why
we had an issue.
- oh no, not new york.
- maybe you're more defensive.
and I was--
- Yeah. That could be it.
maybe I felt I had
to be defensive.
- you're offensive.
- any issues that came about
in new york
was no ill--no.
no--I had no ill intentions.
- I think--I guess
it was a misunderstanding.
she knows nothing.
i didn't tell you anything
about that.
- no, you hesitated.
- I just said
"i'm not going
to say anything.
before she got here,
I said "i don't--
i'm not going to say anything"
'cause I don't want it
to feel--
- that's hard for me to believe,
honestly.
the reality--
The reality of it--
and I am like, honest girl
beyond belief.
- that's dismissing
what I'm saying.
- I just say what I feel.
- faye was like a panther
prowling through the jungle.
- by you saying that is saying
that I'm not telling the truth.
- girlfriends tell each other
what's really going on.
kyle tells me
what's happening in her life.
and if you were her good
girlfriend,
you would know what's happening
in her life.
- she kind of said
"oh, I don't believe that
for a second."
i thought, "here we go."
- so you're saying
we're not good girlfriends
because she didn't tell me
what was happening?
- my psychic ability
tells me, "no."
- [gasps]
- coming up...
- you're off
your [bleep] rocker.
- oh, really?
- that is a [bleep] up thing
to say.
- why don't you go blow up
your lips some more?
- enough! Enough!
- so you're saying
we're not good girlfriends
because she didn't tell me
what was happening?
- my psychic ability
tells me, "no."
- if she needs my help,
she will tell me.
she doesn't rely on me.
She can fight her on battles.
if she can't fight
her own battles
and you have to be there,
so be it,
but don't say I'm not there
for camille.
- did you come here
to defend kyle?
'cause the way you're talking
sounds like she cued you in
and you came to defend her.
is that why you came here,
faye, honestly?
- no, I came here to be
with my girlfriend.
- did you come here--
no, I don't think so
at this point.
- I don't do well
with confrontation.
and it was just coming
every direction.
- oh, my god,
that's not true.
- you're used to that.
- all I know is
there was an attack
made on my friend.
- wait a second. Attack?
wait a second. Wait a second.
Wait a second.
did I think it was a setup?
Absolutely.
yeah. I thought faye was there
to be kyle's wingman.
- camille, that's the way
she sees it.
please,
we don't have to go--
- how did I attack you?
i was at the table--
- let's not head backwards,
please.
- faye, you weren't there.
d.d. Was in new york,
so she knows what happened.
- but she doesn't know
the backstory, camille.
- did I attack kyle?
- No.
honestly, I walked in
and all I saw was--
- of course, because,
camille,
you sat there
the entire night like this,
you know, with your hand there
like that.
- but that's who I am,
kyle.
- no, that's not who you are,
camille.
that's who you are pretending
to be.
- she's not pretending
to be that.
that's who she is.
- oh, allison,
i'm not talking to you.
- Oh, but I'm talking to you.
- I'm not talking to you.
- But I'm talking to you.
- 'scuse me,
you're boring me.
- allison was standing up
for me.
and I--listen, I'm glad
because she's--
out of all the girls
that are there,
she's the only one
that stood up for me.
- camille, I was having
a conversation with you.
- you are entirely washed up.
Enjoy your life.
- I came here bringing allison
'cause allison's
for interesting conversation.
it was
for interesting conversation--
- we're not allowed
to talk to her about it
'cause she's now
"off the clock."
- you're not hiring me.
I'm a dinner guest.
i was being polite.
when y'all were irritating me,
I appeased you.
be clear on that.
i have books written on me
and by me
and had television shows
based on my life.
so you can just, like,
take a flying leap.
- I think the psychic
was way more provocative
than anybody at the table.
she's not a psychic
that I would feel,
oh, yeah, I'm going
to open my heart to.
no. Absolutely not.
she--yeah, she definitely
was starting to piss me off.
- you are. You are.
- I'm so bored
with this conversation.
- then leave.
- I'm totally over it.
- then leave.
If you're over it, then leave.
walk. You've got two legs
the last time we checked.
- ooh.
- [Gasps]
is that what you do
is just attack people?
and then when they get real,
you just, like, become even--
- that is so rich
coming from somebody
that came here
to stir up [bleep].
- allison, you've been
sitting here
with a weird attitude
all night.
- a weird attitude all night?
Wow.
then why were you talking
to me so much?
- I was curious about you.
- well, you know what,
you are not interesting to me
at all.
- well, you're not
to met either.
- so you continue
being interested by me.
that's awesome.
You have two legs too.
they can walk.
- Eew.
what is this?
This what she does?
is this what you do?
- I felt that it started out
positive
and it went down in flames.
- oh, this is ridiculous.
- I just felt like it wasn't
really worth my time
to get involved
with this petty nonsense.
[all speaking at once]
- allison, all I care--
let me tell you something
right now.
all of this is unimportant
to me.
i have four beautiful
children.
look how she turns
her head like this.
what, are we
in elementary school?
- allison was...
[inhales]
[whispers]
puffing away.
- I had also heard
that things were said
at the airport.
- and that's when I came to you
and I said
to you, "where did this
all come from?"
and you said, "taylor,
you were telling me--"
- I wasn't telling you anything.
You were baiting me.
- I wasn't baiting.
- You were 100% baiting me.
i wasn't there.
- all of the sudden,
i hear kim and taylor
fighting again.
what is this? Contagious?
i saw you--
- Please.
do me a favor and don't.
[all arguing]
- this is all [bleep] to me,
okay?
- I feel like the dinner table
was just a swirling tornado.
you need to stand up
and say, "stop."
- why don't you stand up
and say "stop"?
- I can't stop you,
because you're off
your [bleep] rocker.
- oh, really?
- That's the problem with you.
- oh, that's what
I think about you.
- okay, enough.
Girls, enough. Enough.
enough! Enough!
Enough. Enough.
we're not doing this anymore.
i'm not having this anymore.
Enough.
get up.
these are not the ladies
that we are. Enough.
- I don't get it.
I've never had a problem
like this
with a woman in my life.
i don't get it.
- I don't have a problem
with you, kyle.
that's the whole thing.
I--I just...
well, after new york,
I kind of felt bad.
you did call me
a delusional bitch.
there's got to be something else
going on with her
that maybe she doesn't even
know or realize.
i honestly think
it's jealousy.
i think there's some kind
of jealousy there.
i mean, I hate to say that.
I hate saying that.
but I think that it's a big part
of this.
camille, if someone says
to you
"is kelsey going with you
to hawaii?"
and you say "no"
and then you hear
"who wants you without kelsey?"
then that's delusional.
- that is a [bleep] up thing
to say.
that's a [bleep] up thing
to say.
- we can't go
down that road again.
- she's can't say
what camille thought.
she doesn't know that.
She's not camille.
- I'm not talking to you,
allison.
- oh, you are 'cause you're
looking at me.
- get over it. Go. Whatever.
smoke your electronic cigarette
and drink your martini.
i'm talking to camille.
- you said that.
- No. No, you heard that.
you heard that.
- You said that.
if she says you said that,
you said that.
- oh, really?
- you save your stories
and you tweak them.
- no you just lost
all credibility.
- all right.
- All credibility.
- I could give a [bleep]
with you, really.
- it's one thing for us
if we're dealing
with a situation.
- I could give a [bleep].
- you as a psychic says
"oh, you said that
because camille said so."
oh, that's very profound.
- you're nothing.
- You're done.
- you've done nothing.
You're nothing.
- allison, that's okay.
- You've done nothing.
- oh, come on, allison.
That's enough.
- you've done nothing.
- Allison, shh.
- you know what?
Let's go.
- such a bitch.
- Let's go, guys.
come on. Come on. Please.
- my dad said, "live life large
and make no apologies
for who you are."
[bleep] them.
- Allison--
- I don't give a [bleep]
what she thinks about me.
she can [bleep] off.
i can--I can tell you
when she will die
and what will happen
to her family.
i love that about me.
- I--i'm really upset
with the way you--
- no, I'm upset with you.
- I'm upset with you.
taylor and I just--
when there's conflict,
just seem to, like,
look at each other
and it's, like, "meow."
- she's stressing me out
so badly.
- me too. That's how it started
tonight.
- ugh.
- thank you for having us.
Um--oh, god.
- watch--watch your step.
- but she's got to fight
with somebody.
so it's gonna be me,
I guess.
- we already have something
going on with camille.
and then you guys start--
I don't understand this.
- she brought up the word
"insecure"
and she said--
and you said you brought it up
in the airport.
- if I'm already having
a problem with camille,
and there's already problems
and fighting,
why do you bring that up?
- I didn't bring it up.
- in new york, you did.
- oh, my god.
- we're having
a horrible night.
we're having
all this fighting.
all of the sudden,
you decide
to attack taylor out
of the blue.
this is just adding fuel
to the fire.
put your gasoline
and matches away.
flippin' haunted house
at disneyland.
i just want
to get out of here.
i cannot deal
with this crap.
- I mean, it was a few clowns
short of a circus.
- coming up...
- do I have any intentions
of being their friends?
no.
- Their friends?
they can't even
spell "friends."
so that'd be a negative.
- kyle's a little bitch.
she's a little bitch.
She is.
she's the ringleader.
she's all, "yap, yap,
yap, yap, yap."
kyle was every girl
at a high school
that made somebody kill
themselves.
she's that chick.
she's that--
No, she's that girl
that's so mean
and profoundly bankrupt--
- yeah, no, I think
she's morally bankrupt.
- I almost shoved this
up her [bleep] ass
just to prove a point.
except I think she'd need
a bigger one than this
to even feel it.
- oh.
- Oh, yeah, I went there.
- [laughs] you don't want
to go there anymore.
- girl, bitch is a one-syllable
word for a reason.
it's all they understand.
- you started this!
- What?
- wait!
Now she's--
- new york was worse.
- let me just say this,
okay?
- yeah.
- It may seem like a--
- the sprinkler's coming on.
- Oh, [bleep].
- did she turn them on?
Did she turn them on?
- the psychic turned them on.
[laughter]
- so weird.
The whole situation.
- it was just a disaster.
i actually right now
don't know
that those two can ever be
in the same room again.
- kyle set that up
because kyle brought faye.
- kyle is a conspirator.
- Yeah, I noticed that too.
- know that.
- she came into my home
and verbally assaulted me.
um, you know,
fool me once, shame on--
you know--how's it?
- we're the only sane people
in here.
you and I need to stick
together, okay?
- we're gonna ride in one car
and you can take this car
because I can't--
I don't want to go
out of the way
and this and that.
i just want to get home now.
- oh, that's good,
all you ride together
and talk about--
- I'm sorry, but you're
neighbors with camille.
- can I just say this?
if any of their children
disappeared,
they wouldn't be, like,
"you were wrong."
they'd be, like,
"can you help--"
[bleep] them.
- I need a drink!
- that was horrifying.
- Horrible.
- did you not feel like
you were in the house of horrors
between the person
serving the drinks--
and "would you like
a drink?"--
to the girl with the...
[sucking]
- and the bad decor.
- with the electronic cigarette.
- kyle's an angry bitch.
She just is.
it's all she will be.
Know that.
she isn't happy with her life.
- I think you're more on
to her personal life
with her husband
than she wants to accept
and she was even willing
to accept it.
- he loves his nannies.
You can't fault him.
she's an icy bitch.
- he loves more
than his nannies.
- oh, you guys.
- I just--but--
[laughter]
he love women in general.
Let's just say that.
let's be nice.
i'm not saying
he's cheating on her.
- girl, I didn't say
you said that at all.
- I just know that he really
loves women.
- they all left
and went in one car
and left me to go home
by myself.
[phone trilling]
- I missed the part of...
- Kim.
- what she said about you
and lisa.
[phone trilling]
- boy, they all sure
love each other, don't they?
- no. It's because it's easy
to pick on me
because I'm the nice guy.
but if I was out
of the situation,
they would tear
each other apart.
[cell phone rings]
- well, that girl--
That woman was very strange.
- that allison was disgusting.
- She was very strange.
- I felt like I was in
the house of horrors.
- but, honestly,
I would--I would've thought
they would've been
a lot classier.
- them? You thought
they'd be classier.
- no, I agree.
- No, it is a slight against me.
- I thought taylor
was your friend.
but she's not your friend.
- she's a sacrificial lamb.
That's not okay.
- no, she's not your friend.
- who wants to go to the beverly
hills hotel and polo lounge?
- I do!
- Yoo-hoo!
[phone trilling]
- I was really frustrated
with kim
because she did not
have my back
and she knew that.
polo lounge.
- Yes.
- polo lounge!
- do I have any intentions
of being their friends? No.
- their friends?
they can't even
spell "friends."
so that'd be a negative.
- camille, she's mean.
she seems sweet,
but she's like one of those
cheerleaders in high school
that--rrr--
Rip your--yeah--your heart out.
[phone trilling]
- next time on the real
housewives of beverly hills...
[applause]
- uh-oh, what's going on?
- then she said
"we won't be doing business
with your husband anymore."
[cheers]
- check out those guns.
- ah.
- camille and kyle,
i don't think
there's a smooth road ahead.
- to learn more
about the housewives,