The Osbournes Want to Believe (2020–…): Season 1, Episode 7 - See You on the Other Side - full transcript

Oh, it looks like it.

[ humming ] [bleep]

Jackie!

Go and tell them to [bleep] get a move on,
will you?

- What's up [bleep]? - Daddy!

- Hi. Fancy seeing you here.
- He's ready to believe.

Look at this. - [bleep] believe.

Jack: We may be the
first family of darkness,

But not all of us are true
believers in the paranormal.

They want to believe...

Has a ghost ever been
caught on film? Yes.



Man: Whoa! What the... ...And I have
the evidence that will blow their minds.

[ ozzy laughing maniacally ]

I think you're
starting to believe.

Seeing is believing.

- Whoa. - What is happening?

[ screams ]

♪♪

Oh, god, no.

♪♪

[ thunder cracks ] [
ozzy laughs maniacally ]

How are we feeling today?

Really good. Ready.
Fabulously haunted.

Okay. Are we feeling
like we're ready to believe?

I'm willing to try and believe.



♪ I'm a believer ♪ this is it.

Better be some good [bleep] today,
jack.

This is it. We've
got some good stuff.

Let's get going! Later we have my favorite,
which is...

What? I won't give it away.

Onward and upward,
and down we go.

Let's begin at the beginning.

Let's kick it off, then. Go on.

This first clip,
back to some creepy dolls.

Do you find dolls creepy,
just to begin with?

Yes. Clowns and dolls,
yeah. Yeah.

Alright, so this is a doll
which is allegedly haunted.

It's in argentina.

And these women
are doing a ceremony

To try and invoke
the spirits within.

I mean,
it's the whole point of us being here.

The doll starts to move,
but I'm not gonna ruin it.

Jack: These two girls decided

To mess around
with some witchcraft.

You know,
a perfectly normal Saturday night activity.

[ girls speaking spanish ]

They focus their ritual on
their grandmother's doll,

Which she had always
claimed had a spirit clinging to it.

She called the spirit catalina.

Pay attention to the arms.

Girls: Catalina,
catalina. [ speaking spanish ]

Ozzy: Close it. Jack:
Nothing happens at first,

But these amateur conjurers
don't give up that easily.

♪♪

[ girls scream ]

See the arms?

♪♪

[ girls scream ]

Were they chanting for
the devil to possess the doll?

Well, they said, like,

"catalina, catalina,
come back to life.

What the devil took away,
bring back."

Meaning, like,
if the devil took your soul,

Bring it back into the doll. I mean,
let's be honest,

When you're invoking the devil to,
like, possess a doll...

[ laughs ] it's a
really good point.

Play stupid games,
win stupid prizes.

Then they'll go, "see,
it does move, don't it?"

[ speaking gibberish ]

Mama.

[ screams ]

[ laughter ]

I'd [bleep] move if somebody was going,
"ozzy, ozzy, ozzy!"

Yeah. But the doll
wasn't even an old doll.

It was like a new doll.

I think it was an old doll.

The grandmother had
had the doll for a while.

Just well-maintained?

That's a new doll!

They got that
from [bleep] target.

New doll,
old doll? The thing [bleep] moved.

And I saw it move.

He's a believer.

Huh? You're a believer.

I'm not a believer,
but it did move.

Okay. [ laughs ]

What do you think?
Woogie boogie scale?

2. 3.

Come on! Seriously?

That's a bit harsh,
don't you think?

No, the grandma was behind it,
obviously, doing....

Have you ever done a séance?

Yes. Have you
ever done a séance?

No! Like, in, like, the swinging '60s,
you guys would...?

No!

♪♪

Alright, um...

Can I just ask something,
though?

Aren't south american
people historically very, um...

Well, they're very catholic,
so they've very superstitious.

...Very superstitious. That's
the word I'm looking for.

Yeah. Well,
central and south america,

You've got to look at kind
of the cultural influence.

You've got the kind of, you know,
indigenous population,

Which was, you know,
incan, mayan, you know,

Early civilizations that
were highly superstitious.

I think superstitious are if you
don't understand certain things

And you feel weird when
certain things happen.

Why'd you buy a green car, then?

Somebody said to me,
a long, long time ago

"don't ever buy a green car."

And I said,
"it's a load of old [bleep]."

So I bought a green car,
and it was never out the shop.

So you're superstitious.

So, you know where that came from,
the green car?

That actually came about
during world war ii because...

No! It was because,
during the blitz,

And they were bombing london...

♪ I'm a believer ♪

...Some people would
be driving in a car

And a bomb would
land on their car,

And the car was green.

And so a superstition
went around

That they were
bombing the green cars.

I didn't get bombed.
I didn't get bombed.

You bought a bomb, though.

A lemon. A lemon.

Okay,
so this is the ortega poltergeist.

Jack: So, this happened to
jorge ortega and his family.

He was in a coma for a week,
having had a heart failure.

While he was in the coma,
jorge dreamed of a little girl...

Ozzy: Pervert. Jack:
...Handing him a stuffed animal.

Anyway,
he wakes up a week later,

And the stuffed animal
he saw in his dream

Is sitting right next to him.

I think jorge's not well.

Well,
he's not. He was in a coma.

Yeah, but he's still not well.

Well, but here's the thing.

His wife says a
little girl came to her

And gave her the stuffed
animal to give to jorge.

Of course,
she asked the little girl why,

And the girl said that
it'll help him get better.

When he recovers,

He takes the lucky stuffed
animal home with him,

And things start
to get a little weird.

Watch the scooter.

There's, like,
a little kid's scooter right here.

[ speaking spanish ]

That's the top of it here.

[bleep] look at this thing.

Starts moving by itself.

I mean,
it's all [bleep] look, watch.

♪♪

See the scooter move?

[ dog barks ] what the [bleep]?

Am I watching a dog
bark? That's weird.

Maybe he's got a
bit of a wire 'round it.

But what about this? Watch.

Jack: The stuffed animal
the little girl gave him

Starts to move on its own.

No, it fell.

It [bleep] fell. Just fell.

Jack: Well,
jorge sure isn't laughing.

♪♪

He calls a medium and asks
her to investigate the activity.

She's immediately
drawn to the stuffed animal

And warns him that a little
girl's spirit is attached to it,

And things are only
gonna get worse

If he keeps it around.

When he tries to
communicate with the spirit,

He gets some really clear evps.

And then the spirit
manifests in the room.

Alright, now you see it. Watch.

It's sat on the bed. Watch.

Look at the shadow.

Where? They'll
go back and play it.

Look, right here. Look at that.

It looks like a coat
that's hanging on a hook.

That's it... coat.
Hanging on hook.

It's a haunted coat.

♪♪

So we don't believe this one?

No. No. Haunted coat. That's it.

But now,
you were in a coma for a little bit.

I mean, you could...

I never dreamt
of stuffed animals.

But you had an out-of-body
experience in hospital, though.

I mean,
that journey that I went on

When I was in that
coma was [bleep].

I can still remember it
as if it was yesterday.

Mm. You... I flew
down to new zealand,

And you had dyed your
hair in a mohican cut.

And it was white,
and it was so real.

It's a [bleep] strange dream,
but very clear.

Yeah. I do believe that

There is some different spiritual
plane we end up in. I think...

I do believe, however,
that we've forgotten

How to do certain
things with our bodies.

Like, if you didn't, say,
do things with your arm,

Your arm would wither away.

Yeah. I use the cement analogy.

The romans invented cement,

And when the roman
empire collapsed,

People forgot how to make
cement for like 1,500 years.

And then it was, like,
accidentally rediscovered,

Even though it
had already existed.

It's kind of like,
a dog will go into a room

And it will pick
up a vibe. Yeah.

Yeah, it just frightened you.

That's what it was. No,
it wasn't.

I'm not with her butt... I thought
you were getting fresh with me.

Shut up! I'm just
stroking her back.

I'm not touching... you
were fondling her genitalia.

Okay, so where would you rate
this on the woogie boogie scale?

1. 2.

Mm. Okay.

What do we think, bella?

Bella doesn't really know
what she thinks anymore.

What do you think, bella?

Oooh!

Ohh, daddy!

Oh, daddy!

My little baby girl.

Sorry!

Um, okay. Let's go.

When you die... Yes?

...And you're given the option

To, like, haunt or visit,
would you?

Oh, yeah! Who would you haunt?

Oh, god,
there's a whole list of people.

We've got a good
poltergeist one for you to see.

That's [bleep] weird.

I would be running around, like,
"aah, I can't believe it! Aah!"

♪♪

[ ozzy laughing maniacally ]

♪♪

What lucky parents we are
to have bella as our baby.

Are you guys gonna leave
all your wealth to the dogs?

No, the cats. They live longer.

The cats. Ah. [ bella whines ]

♪♪

Okay, so this is,
a cemetery security guard films hauntings.

Okay. And it's interesting

Just because of what
he captures on camera.

And he's going into a mausoleum,
where he can hear noises.

Joshua: I'm actually hearing
something banging on the door.

I'm hoping I'm gonna
catch this son of a [bleep].

Jack: So,
this happened to a security guard last year

In savannah,
georgia. The guy's name is joshua runyan.

And the footage went viral.

He was working the night shift

And he heard some noise
coming from the mausoleum.

So he went to check it out.

Joshua: The door was open again.

Hello! Security!

Jack: Did you hear that?

It sounds like someone yelled,
"help!"

To me,
it sounds like a little girl, right?

Joshua: Hello?

♪♪

Jack: He searches
the whole mausoleum

And doesn't find anything.

So he goes back to his
truck to look at the footage.

And upon playback,
he notices something really weird.

♪♪

Did you catch that?

Ozzy: What?

Jack: Upper right-hand
corner... A pair of legs.

You see on the floor, there?

This is not a
[bleep] pair of legs.

It's a [bleep] chair, or a vase.

I'd say it's a haunted vase.

Jack: Okay, so we have your
theory about the haunted vase

And the haunted chair.

But what about the voice?

The hearing of the voice. Yeah,
it's the voice.

I think the voice is the most
convincing part of this video.

♪♪

Being in a [bleep] mausoleum
after dark... [bleep] that.

You wouldn't do that?

No! Got to be [bleep]

You've been to the
forever hollywood?

I've been there,
yeah, but I haven't...

Would you stay there? No.

In the mausoleum?

I'll tell you,
I went to sicily one time,

And they have catacombs there.

And they've got
[bleep] dead bodies

Hanging all over the [bleep]

Do you know the ones in paris?

There is a legend
about a guy who got lost

And died in the
catacombs in the 1800s.

Can you imagine
getting lost down there

And never finding your way out?

Imagine how horrible that would be. Oh,
that's horrible.

Yeah. Ugh!

You wouldn't
have to go very far.

It'd be a cheap funeral.

[ chuckles ]

Yeah,
they just put you back in the wall.

That would be interesting,
though.

I wonder if they'd
ever let you go in there

And spend the night.

Where? In the catacombs?

I'm sure it could be arranged.

Can't be me. [bleep] that.

Mausoleums are weird, though.

Why? Like, so you're just, like,

Put in a building, in a wall?

What's her name?

Oh, you saw evita's... Mausoleum,
yeah.

Wow. It's in the
shape of a shoe.

Is it? It ain't.

She liked shoes!

It ain't in the shape
of a [bleep] shoe.

It's a [bleep]
palatial building.

Didn't she have like
10,000 shoes or something?

She was a dictator,
wasn't she? Yeah.

Did they kill her, or she died?

She died of cancer. Died.

But they exhumed the
grave many years later,

And she was perfectly preserved.

Really? And they
found the other shoe!

Okay.

[bleep] off,
you and these [bleep] shoes.

[ chuckles ]

Woogie boogie scale?

I'll give that a 2.

A 2?

Ugh, you're killing me!

I think the most
frightening thing

Was the little girl's voice.

Okay. But if I was
in a mausoleum

And I heard a
little girl's voice

In the dead of night,
it would frighten the life out of me.

Here's a question...

When you die... Yes?

...And you realize, okay,

There's like another
place you can go to,

But you're given the option to,
like, go back

And, like, "haunt" or visit,
would you?

Oh, yeah! Who would you haunt?

Oh, god,
there's a whole list of people.

It's about this long. It would be fun,
come on.

You're gonna be haunting for a long,
long time.

Well no, I mean, like,
if you were given the option

To like, "hey, you can, like,

Hang out in this, like, cool,
like, new spiritual realm,

Or you can, like,
dip back into earth for a bit

And go [bleep] with some
people." and then come back.

Yeah. Oh, yeah, I would do that.

Yeah. Definitely.

What would be, like,
your haunting of choice?

Like,
what would you do? Would you move things?

Would you just... Oh,
I don't know.

I would just do... I'd
[bleep] with people.

I would just [bleep] with them. Like,
pull their hair apart

And undo their clothes
and all that [bleep]

So you'd be like a pervert?

Probably.

What's this now?
This one is a good one.

This is a dash cam from a truck,

And it captures a ghost
walking through the crosswalk.

Watch this.

Jack: This happened in 2016

On a really busy
highway in japan.

This is wild. Watch
the crosswalk.

This woman literally
appears in front of the truck.

[ horn blaring ]

Double exposure. It's digital.

You can't double-expose digital.

You want to watch it again?

It's very odd. Look,
she just materializes.

♪♪

[ horn blaring ]

Crazy, right? Yeah.

I think it's something
with the camera.

You think it's
trickery. Tomfoolery.

Think it's just something
wrong with the camera,

Or it's a double
exposure or something.

What do you think?

I don't know, but it looks good.

Woogie boogie
scale for you guys?

4.

5. Okay, I'll take it.

Have you ever thought you'd
seen something that wasn't there?

Not that I can remember,
no. Alright.

[ chuckles ]

So, now that there's dash cams

And there's motor
highway cameras,

Like, always mounted, looking,

They're starting to
capture this more and more.

And it's becoming
a bit of a trend,

Or a phenomenon,
however you want to call it.

And this next clip... Well,
you'll see.

Jack: This clip is
from a cctv camera

Outside of a grocery
store in the philippines.

Just watch the street.

A man appears to
emerge out of nowhere,

And then he just walks
right into the oncoming traffic

And vehicles go
right through him.

♪♪

It's the camera. It's a
glitch on the camera.

It's double exposure, yeah.

But these are digital images.

You can't double-expose
digital images.

Well,
it's something with the camera.

I don't agree. Look at it again.

That's odd to me.

♪♪

It's an image of
someone walking.

Whether it's a
trickery of the camera

Or whether it's a real ghost...

To me,
I think it's like a double exposure

Or somebody was messing
with the camera or something,

Because it's like the
cars go on through it.

I think it's like... Do
you remember the movie

"ghost" with patrick swayze
and whoopi goldberg?

Yeah. And the ghosts,

They just used to walk
around and you couldn't see,

And they'd go through walls,
and why not?

Yeah, but I'm just saying,

Why would that
camera pick it up?

One thing that's
interesting about it...

It's all in kind of
a black silhouette.

If it was a double exposure,
wouldn't it have definition?

Yeah. Like, a double exposure

Wouldn't do, like,
a halfway exposure.

You would still...

It wouldn't be in silhouette,
ah? No.

Alright. Woogie boogie?

7. Oh! Oh, okay.

You've upped it on that one.

Mum? 5.

Alright,
now we're getting somewhere.

But, like the other one,
from japan, right?

Yep. It's good film.

Is it somebody messing with it?

I don't know. But it
looks good. Yeah.

This clip is some of the
weirdest footage I've ever seen.

Whenever they
have scary children,

They always put
them in red jackets.

Why do people do that?

So you can see them
when they levitate.

She was the one with
the... [ speaking indistinctly ]

Just wanted to clear it up. So
what would you say that was?

Hi, greenacres assisted living?

♪♪

[ ozzy laughing maniacally ]

♪♪

We should maybe do
that show "hoarders"

And do an episode on mum,

Because there's, like,
pillars of wood in storage,

And I'm like,
"can we throw these out?"

Mom's like, "no, no,
those are valuable."

Pillars of wood? White pillars.

They were like these wooden,
white pillars

That were in someone's
dressing room.

Every dressing
room tells a story.

Get rid of them! [bleep] no!

No. What are you gonna
do with big pillars of wood?

Me and sharon will reminisce

When we're old
and gray and wrinkly.

Oh, you know what you should do?

You should haunt all of
those [bleep] objects, then.

Then I'll sell them.

♪♪

[ ozzy laughing maniacally ]

Now, this clip is, like,

A world-renowned
classic paranormal clip.

People have been
trying to figure out

What the [bleep]
this is for a long time.

It's some of the
weirdest footage

I've ever seen.

Jack: So, this is in russia.

A man is taking his dog,
tarzan, for a walk in the woods.

Man: Tarzan!

Jack: It looks like the dog
catches the scent of something

And bolts after it.

His owner tries
to go get him back.

Man: Come here.

Why is the russian man
speaking in english to his dog?

Maybe he's working
on his english.

Maybe he's married
to an englishwoman.

Jack: I don't know.

But that's not the
unexplainable part of this video.

Just wait.

Man: Tarzan! Tarzan!

Jack: So the dog takes off,
and the guy runs after him

And stumbles upon this.

Look at this.

♪♪

How weird is that?

Inflatable? I don't think so.

She could be a witch.

- Maybe she's superman.
- Or she's a witch.

♪♪

And I guess we'll never know,

Because the dog
scares the pair off

Before the guy can figure out
what the [bleep] is going on.

♪♪

Maybe they're aliens.

Most people think it's
some kind of witchcraft.

It's very [bleep] strange,
that is.

It moves around too much,

And she's consistently
staying there,

For it to be doctored in.

Whenever they have,
like, scary children,

They always put them in red coats,
or red jackets.

Why do people do that?

So you can see them
when they levitate.

That's true. You can see
them shoot across the sky.

If she wearing,
like, a green one,

She'd blend in with the trees,
wouldn't she?

No, she'd get bombed,
'cause they'd think she was a car.

Alright, so where are we at
on the woogie boogie scale

Of our floating little
red riding hood?

Oh, 8. 8, 9.

Very convincing.

Now, that's more like it!

It's the most convincing
thing we've seen today, for me.

I think so.

[ rimshot ]

Alright, if you had a superpower,
what would it be?

Would you levitate?

Mind-read. Mind-read? Mum?

I'd either mind-read
or be invisible.

Would you? But if you could be invisible,
though,

Would your clothes go invisible,
too,

Or would you have to
be naked and invisible?

Oh. Oh, naked and invisible.

So you would just run
around... But you'd be cold.

I wouldn't want people
knowing I was there.

Yeah, but what happens if
they found you accidentally

And you're running around
naked? And you're like, "oh, wait."

Alright, moving on,
with the invisible woman

And the mind-reading dad.

This next clip is a pilot,
who was flying a little cessna,

And two ufos whizz past
him. And they're not planes,

Because they're
moving entirely too fast.

And they move so quickly,
you almost can't see them.

Does it look like
ball lightning?

No,
it doesn't. They look like silver rods.

Okay.

Jack: This happened in
2014 to an argentinian pilot.

He's flying a private
aircraft at about 5,000 feet.

And then, boom!

This unidentified
aerial phenomenon,

Or uap for short,
comes out of nowhere,

Going incredibly fast.

I need to see it again,
because... Alright.

You didn't really catch it,
did you?

See that? Now watch. The
next one goes even faster.

And then the shapes of these
uaps are entirely different.

Ozzy: It sounds
like something flying,

And the one catches
up with the other one,

And then they both come... Yeah.

Now watch. You've seen both.

Jack: About one minute later,
they come back.

Okay, watch this.

♪♪

Weird, right?

It could be some
military experiment.

Yeah, but that's... That's wild.

And why would... I just...

I feel, like,
the military wouldn't risk, like...

Did they go that way,
then came back that way? Yeah.

But they went that
way separately,

But came back together. Yeah,
they went that way first,

And then they came back. And,
yeah, and they went ssh, ssh!

And then they
came back together.

Right. It could be some
plane. I don't know.

Usually,
if someone's gonna fake something,

They want attention,
but he just doesn't want to be identified.

I mean,
I'm not saying it's fake.

But you think it
could be other things.

I don't think this could be
from an other world, you see.

It could be something from this world,
being tested.

A new fighter... Where was this?

In argentina.

They were looking
for evita's shoes.

That's what they
were... Two shoes flying.

Just threw...

He threw them out the
window of the plane. [ laughs ]

Do you think it could of
been ufos racing each other?

No. Come to earth
for a little race?

No. It's definitely something
flying across the sky.

Whether it's a ufo,
I don't know.

But it's definitely
something flying.

I read a book about
area 51 a few years ago,

And they were talking
about when the test pilots

That were testing all the new,
like, supersonic planes

And stealth fighters
and all that stuff,

They had, like, a no-fly zone

In this whole area
around area 51,

Where the planes could fly.

And sometimes they would
encounter planes flying past.

So what they started
doing is [bleep] with pilots

That had no idea
what was going on.

They would put on
"planet of the apes" masks

And be flying these, like,
supersonic fighter jets...

Look at that!

...To [bleep] with these
other military pilots being,

Like, "wait,
is 'planet of the apes' real?"

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well,
so what do you think about that?

Oh, I think that's from earth

And it's testing some
new flying thing out.

That's what I think.

And, for that,
I give it a 4 or 5.

Okay. I think it's
very interesting.

[ drumroll ]

Yeah. And?

I don't know what it is. Okay.

Jack: The thing attracts a
whole crowd of curious onlookers.

It looks like the old pregnancy
test you used to take,

Where it would...
What the [bleep]?

Don't you remember,
when we took...

No! I was drunk. Wonderful.

♪♪

♪♪

What's the matter? Nothing.

I'm just looking
at you and thinking

What a lucky man I am
to have you as my wife.

[ jack retches ]
what do you want?

I love you.

♪♪

Alright,
this is a ufo in switzerland.

Oh, does it yodel?

[ woman yodeling ]

It's wearing lederhosen and...

Has a long pipe. As it's going,
"ricola!"

Jack: So, this happened

In the lovely town of brugg,
switzerland.

Lulzim is out walking his dog

When he notices
something unusual in the sky.

[ man speaking
foreign language ]

It's got a
different-colored center.

Yeah. Ball lightning.

No! We did a bit of
research into ball lightning.

Jack: And this doesn't
sound like ball lightning

From the description I've read.

Ozzy: Oh,
it's [bleep] ball lightning again.

Alright,
so ball lightning can only really occur

In stormy environments,
like lightning normally does.

So lots of cloud cover,
friction, things like that.

That's clear blue sky.

Jack: And, anyway,
it doesn't move

Anything like ball
lightning is supposed to.

♪♪

The thing attracts a whole
crowd of curious onlookers

Before it vanishes into the sky.

I don't know. Maybe it's...

And it looks, actually,
like the old pregnancy test

You used to take,

Where it... what
the [bleep] are you...

Well, I'm telling you! Where
it would be a white ball

And in the middle,
if you were pregnant,

It would come orange.
That's it... it's pregnant!

And then the outside
would be white.

It looks... It's ball lightning,
pregnant.

Don't you remember... No.

When we took them all,
in germany?

I was drunk! Oh, yeah,
well... Bloody hell.

Well,
it looks like a pregnancy test,

But why is it orange in
the center? Wonderful.

I think that... I mean,
I have this whole theory,

Because I've been watching
so many of these videos.

I think these are
essentially probes

That aliens are sending
to earth to [bleep]

On atmosphere,
on environment, on population.

And it's sending
information back.

And I think this is, like,

They're sending
more and more of them

Because they're gonna come soon.

Like,
think about how many probes

We've sent to mars, right,

Because we're getting
ready to go there.

So, they're like, "quick,
keep sending more.

We need more data. We
need more satellites." maybe.

And I think they're just
sending a ton of stuff

'cause they're
gonna turn up soon.

But it could be a pregnant
[bleep] ball lightning.

Pregnant ball
lightning is a theory.

Just out of curiosity,
what is the hesitation

To be more open to
the fact that it's plausible

That it could be
some extraterrestrial?

Well,
I've never actually met or seen a ufo

That's landed and a
little green man's got out

And going,
"yi-yi-yi-yi!" and gone back in.

[ laughs ]

I mean,
there's sightings every day,

And there's [bleep]
books on it and films on it,

And people have
witnessed things.

But until I actually
see something land...

Do you agree?
Anything is possible.

Anything is possible.

Yeah, but seeing is believing.

Do you think, in our lifetime,
aliens, they will arrive?

Well,
put it this way... If they come here,

I'll be going out there. Yeah.

I wonder,
if they do arrive here,

If they could sell tickets

So we can all just
[bleep] leave with them.

Yeah, I know.

Oh, yeah. Would you?

Like, as a family,
if they were like,

"hey, listen,
the whole family can go." no.

Yes,
but do you know what I've just thinked?

And I've just thinked
about the shoe.

It was imelda marcos.

What the [bleep]
is in your head?

It wasn't evita. Evita,
it wasn't her.

It was imelda
that had the shoes.

What's it got to do with
[bleep] pregnant ball lightning?

Imelda marcos wasn't in "evita."

She was the one with the shoes.

And the [bleep] alien
ball lightning is pregnant.

She was the one with the shoe,
and I got them mixed up.

Oh, and so what are you...
just wanted to clear it up.

Hi, greenacres assisted living?

Yeah, can you come and pick up
two senile elderly grandparents?

Yeah, that would be great.

Yeah,
by five o'clock would be awesome.

Thank you. Okay. Bye.

I'm glad you informed me
about imelda marcos, sharon.

That's really made
my [bleep] day.

I wanted to clear it up,
that was all.

Okay.

Do you think aliens are
visiting switzerland for the...

Hiding money? No.

For the banking
system. Bank accounts.

The pregnant ball lightning,
going for a yodeling lesson.

[ man yodeling ]

[bleep] hell.

Oh, that's a joke!

What the [bleep]?

Aaah!

They've used her as, like,
a voice box for ghosts.

- You are here.
- Oh god, I'm done.

♪♪

♪♪

On from ufos and
into poltergeists,

Which I think
is your favorite...

Look, I must admit that
in everything that I've seen

On these things
we've been doing,

The poltergeists have
been very convincing. Yeah?

We've got a good
poltergeist one for you to see,

Which is bonkers.

Jack: Andy gomez is an
employee at a weed dispensary

In downtown oregon city.

And he's working one
night and is startled

When a jar slides
off the counter.

Watch the jar.

Vibration.

Jack: That's probably
what andy thinks at first.

But when he looks
at the security footage

From multiple angles,

He notices the jar
gradually moving to the edge

For over six minutes.

Ozzy: Vibration.

No,
'cause it was kind of suspended in...

Yeah, it was like slowly...

It would be a
consistent vibration.

Nothing else is moving.

Jack: And not only that...
Over the next few weeks,

The camera picks up more
bizarre activity in the same spot.

♪♪

And here's the thing...

Since he works in oregon,
they have to have, like,

State-certified cameras
in the weed dispensaries,

Because they're dealing in a... You know,
with marijuana.

So,
if they get caught tampering with it,

The whole shop gets shut down.

♪♪

Creepy!

It can be explained.

I mean,
the thing with the scissors in the jar,

It could have been
sliding off the pens.

In my bathroom,
I put this glass on the side,

But it sometimes
slides on its own.

Woogie boogie scale?

I'll give that one a 4.

A 4? 3.

Seriously?

Somewhere,
you've shown me other ones

Which have been far more
[bleep] convincing than that one.

Now,
this is a woman I believe in England,

Whose brother has passed away,

And she feels like
he's haunting her.

Donna lives in beaulieu,
England.

He brother, with whom she'd
had a troubled relationship with,

Died shortly before this
poltergeist activity started.

Donna: Oh, my gosh.

The surface isn't
wet or anything.

It's all dry.

[as donna] "it's all dry."

Jack: She documented
hours of this activity.

This unseen force
moves the chandelier.

It screws around with
the flowers in her vase.

Donna: Oh...!

Jack: And it chucks
silverware around the kitchen.

♪♪

That's [bleep] weird.

♪♪

Jack: It seems like her brother
wants to carry on their grudge match

From beyond the grave.

Donna: What do you want?!

Oh, my god!

That's [bleep] weird.

Isn't that weird? Believable.

What would you do if you
came down to the kitchen,

You've just made your
coffee in the morning,

And all of a sudden you
see the spoon doing that?

I wouldn't have done that.

I would be running around like,
"aah! I can't believe it. Aah!"

She was very,
like... Uhhh, you know.

"legged it." [ both laugh ]

What would you give that one?

6. 6?

8. An 8.

[ screams ]

Okay. Moving on.

Here's a question... What's
that story about geezer

Writing the lyrics
to black sabbath,

And the demon at
the foot of his bed?

That was his wife. Oh, yeah?

♪♪

♪♪

Now,
I'm gonna explain this to you,

'cause this is
from portals to hell.

This is captain grant's
inn in connecticut.

So, captain grant's inn
was this really old house,

Like colonial days,
and then turned into an inn.

The woman that owns it
is a woman named carol

Who's experienced
paranormal activity in this place

Since she's owned it. Since,
like, the '80s.

And we did an
experiment with her,

Where we essentially used her as,
like,

A voice box for ghosts.

She was in one house,
and we put katrina in another location.

Katrina was asking questions,

And the woman, carol,
was answering them.

She didn't know prior? Nothing.

Nothing prior. Nothing.

Okay. Just watch this footage.

So, there's carol.

Look,
she's got earphones on. She can't hear.

She's got a blindfold on.

I'm in the basement,
underneath her.

She can't hear anything.

You are here. "you are here."

You're here.

She's saying, "you're here."

Tell me why you're so angry.

Katrina's in a different house.

She's shaking her head no.

Katrina: Talk through carol
and tell me why you're so angry.

What happened to you?

Joseph.

- I heard "joseph."
- is that your name? Joseph?

- Yeah. - Now she's saying yes.

Are you joseph whipple?

- Yeah. - Yes.

Jack: Katrina isn't even in the
same house as carol right now.

This is [bleep] weird.

Did you enter carol's
body two times?

This is insane!

Nodding yes. - Why?

I don't understand why
you want to enter her body.

Did carol do something
wrong? Is that why you're angry?

I'm done.

What the [bleep]?

[bleep] she said yeah.

She says, "I'm done." yeah.

That wasn't no [bleep]

She was answering
the questions that...

No she wasn't!

She was just going,
"urgh! And, "I'm done."

Seriously,
you guys just don't get it.

Watch the full
episode and you'll see.

It's insane. If you've
got better footage,

You could've
shown better footage.

[ wah-wah-wah-wah ]

I'll give that a...

5. Yeah.

All this work,
and again with the low scores?

Alright,
so on the believability scale,

Where are we at
with just ghosts?

I believe in energies,
and I believe,

Like I've said before,
about people's souls

And things like that.

But have I ever seen a ghost

Or heard what I
thought was a ghost?

No. I do believe in fate.

Like,
they're not meant to be old.

Yeah. You can look at
people and you can think,

"I could never, ever,
ever imagine..."

That was something. Randy...
I knew from the moment

I met him,
I knew he wouldn't make old bones.

What's the saying?

"the flame that burns twice
as bright lasts half as long."

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah,
you know what I'm terrified of?

Dying in a plane crash.

Years ago, there was a flight
going from chicago airport.

On takeoff, the engine fell off,
and it crashed and burned.

Everyone got killed.

Wow. You were supposed
to be on the plane?

I had the ticket.

I used to think that
if I was on a plane

With somebody famous,
the plane wouldn't crash.

Now, how ridiculous is that?

So that's why you married me?

[ laughs ]

Here's a question...
What's that story about

Geezer writing the
lyrics to black sabbath

And saying that he saw a
demon at the foot of his bed

Because he had some book?

Nah. Me and bill wrote the...

That was his wife.

Me and bill wrote the
lyrics to black sabbath.

Oh, yeah?

What is this that
stands before me?

Yeah. But, you know, I mean...

Don't listen to any of it,
because I went and stayed there,

And then they were
throwing bloody billiard balls

Through the window,
and they were telling the owner

Of the house it was
haunted. It was them,

Throwing the billiard
balls through the window

So they wouldn't have
to pay the damage,

And then they were telling
the owner it was a ghost.

What are you scared of? Like,
what freaks you out?

Fire and spiders.

Anything freak you out?

Your mum. Oh, okay.

Alright, well,
that's what we've got for this episode.

It was good fun. Yeah.

We've got more coming up,

So make sure you guys
tune in next week for...

Please tune in. It's
gonna be even scarier.

..."osbournes want to believe."

Look for flying
kids in the forest.

♪♪

Let's begin at the beginning.

[ laughs maniacally ]

What do we think, bella?

Bella doesn't really know
what she thinks anymore.

My little baby girl.

Are we feeling like
we're ready to believe?

Ready! ♪ I'm a believer ♪

Ozzy, ozzy, ozzy!

Were they chanting
for the devil?

Onward and upward,
and down we go.

Ugh. Who's got aaa?