The Odyssey (1992–1994): Season 3, Episode 12 - The Plague - full transcript

(suspenseful music)

(dull thud)

- [Jay] The doctor said I was in a coma.

Maybe I was,

but there is a world beyond consciousness,

that they knew nothing about.

But when I came back,
nothing was quite the same.

And I couldn't leave
that other world behind.

My Odyssey continues.

- Do you have any plans
for tomorrow night?

- Why you feel like cooking?



- Well, I have this friend.

I thought we might all have dinner.

- Have I met this friend before?

- It's someone really special.

Make that great roast
dinner like you used to.

- You're out to impress her, huh?

Okay, can I invite Steve?

- No, I just want it
to be the three of us.

- All right, you're the boss.

- Thanks mom.

- Your reign as boss is over, Finger.

- Go on.

Finish me off.

If you've got the guts.



- That would be too easy.

You've got too much to answer for.

- Shut up (laughs)

and do it already.

- No.

We're taking over the tower
and the worst thing for you

will be to learn how to
live like a regular kid.

- Dad, what are you
doing for dinner tonight?

- I don't know.

- Well I was thinking it should
be something really special.

(kids yelling)

♪ Kumbaya my Lord, kumbaya ♪

- You have to do something about them.

♪ Kumbaya my Lord, kumbaya ♪

- Don't you harmonically
challenged monitors

have anything better to do?

- Spare any change for us?

- Jay, all the monitors do now sit around,

generally being quite annoying.

You've got to put them back to work

before they stop asking for
stuff and just start taking it.

- My chaos cosmos theory of kid control

confirms an innate compulsion
for global sub domination.

- What my socially stunted
colleague here is trying to say,

monitors need to be told what to do.

- All the kids need a leader.

You took the tower.

So you take the throne.

- If they need a leader, they
should pick the one they want.

We'll hold an election.

- I've read about that.

It means every kid gets together,

and picks one leader for all of us.

- Every kid?

Ugh, what a nuisance.

It'll never work.

- I'll make it work.

Where were you all that time?

- You know, I can't tell you that.

- Well, why'd you have
to stay away for so long?

The cold war is over.

- But there's still evil in the world.

Look, you think I wanted to leave you?

- I don't know.

Don't other spies have
families to go home to?

- Jay, sometimes the
hard decisions in life

are made for you.

- Tell me about it.

You sound like--

- Your father.

- I wouldn't know, it's been too long.

- Jay, are you sure you
know what you're doing?

Nobody ever asks kids what they want.

- I will.

It's about time they get a
chance to pick their own leader.

- Hey, she's got food.

- Hey!

How many times I gotta tell you bozos?

Get your own snacks.

- Who cares?

You're not our boss.

- I want to see my smile in that shine.

Savage!

Polish your own shoes!

- Shuffle begs me to let him do this.

Don't you Shuffle?

- Forget it, those days are over.

Everybody line up.

Come on.

Line up with everyone else.

- Excuse me, sir.

But I know how to quiet these
shiftless little monitors.

- You too, Savage.

Let's get started.

We've got an election to run.

I'd like to introduce the candidates.

They all want to be your leader,
but you can only pick one.

It's going to be tough.

They all have something good to give us.

Flash.

He's the bravest kid.

He can bring us safety and security.

And Lila,

she can keep our world
running as smooth as gravy.

- Me too.

Kids find me attractive.

Or at least that's what they tell me.

- They're scared of you.

They'll tell you anything,

- But I've changed, honest.

- It's a free world now.

That's what it's all about.

Anyone can run.

Even Savage, a recovering thug.

- What are we supposed to do?

- Vote.

- What's that?

- It's simple.

Alpha.

Kids pick their leader from
the candidates listed on

this ballot.

All you do is put an X beside
the candidate of your choice.

- My choice?

- That's how it works.

- They always told me what to do.

Can I put an X beside your name?

- No, I'm not going to be a candidate.

That's my choice.

That's the good thing about elections.

You each get to make your own choice.

If you've got nothing to tell me,

then what are we doing here?

- I missed you.

Seven years and all I had of you was this.

I used to love hanging out
with you when you were a kid.

- (laughs) Hey, who's that guy?

- That's what I've been
trying to find out.

- He looks pretty happy.

- That was on our vacation up the coast.

- Yeah.

You had a lot to be happy about back then.

You know, but we can do that again.

- You mean go on a vacation?

- No, no.

Well, yeah, maybe.

Well, I mean, let's get
these pictures updated.

There's got to be one
of those photo booths

around here some place.

Come on.

- The past is back and it's
better because it's now.

I promise no taxes on goods
stolen through dubious means.

I'll even help you.

- I'm all for that.

- I know this election
thing is complicated.

There are a lot of choices to be made

and it's all up to you.

You see my name on this piece of paper?

Choose me!

What do you do when you see my
name on this piece of paper?

Does this mean you're
not going to vote for me?

(dull thud)

- Okay.

- I don't want to.

- (chuckles) Too late.

Hey, you use less muscles in a smile

than you do in a frown, you know.

I know how to make you laugh.

- The audience is going
to be here any second.

We don't have much time.

Savage.

Wipe that phony smile off your face.

- Hey, this is my winning smile.

Splendid confidence and pure terror.

Just beneath the surface.

- But how do you get your teeth so white?

- He gnaws on a bone.

- Who told him?

- Jay.

Can you take a look at my speech?

- Tough break.

- Public speaking makes my palms sweat.

It's a stress reaction.

- Tell me what you're going to say.

- I have a dream that monitors
and regular kids can live

together in peace

or I'll pound 'em out.

- I dunno about pound 'em out.

Try something a little more upbeat.

Jay, if you want to tell kids what to do,

then be a candidate.

Otherwise they have to do it themselves.

- I just want everything to be right.

Where is everyone?

The debate starts in a few minutes.

- We have a problem. There
are reports of sickness

throughout the world.

Neo mortis has set in.

Kids are unable to execute
even the grossest motor skills.

- How did it start?

- Well, it seems to have
originated here in the tower,

but we find these kids wherever
we stop on the campaign

trail.

- What's causing it?

- You have a [Inaudible]
still under investigation.

- Get all the infected kids

and put them where they'll be safe.

I don't want this to get
out and ruin the election.

- I believe it is beyond that.

- You look pretty goofy in this one.

- I look a lot older, but
you haven't changed a bit.

- Well, we could be brothers.

What do you want to eat tonight?

How about that Greek place you like?

- Uh-uh, even better.

Roast beef, baked potatoes and onions.

- Sounds like those old Sunday dinners.

- Yeah, it is.

- Mom's been cooking all day.

- I don't think I'm going to
be the most popular guy in the

world.

- No, she wants to see you.

She talks about you all the time.

- Well, that's great,

but you should have let me know before.

I gotta, I gotta get
flowers, I gotta get changed.

- Dad, it doesn't matter.

- We gotta do it right.

You explain it to your
mom for me, all right?

And we'll do it tomorrow.

I promise.

- We have to do it today.

- We waited seven years already.

One more day won't hurt.

- This is creepy.

- It's like the Ice Age.

- Without the ice.

- Everybody is sick, except
for the candidates, and us.

- Fractal, do you have any answers yet?

- You will notice that the
plagues victim's lips are all

frozen and mid-foul.

All forming the same last syllable.

Perhaps you will allow me to
demonstrate the scientific

verifiability of my theory.

Exhibit A,

a monitor.

Once he was enthusiastic
about the election.

But when faced with the reality
of making the final choice,

here he is.

Exhibit A Prime.

In his eyes, the image
of his last thought.

The X, the one choice he couldn't make.

- You've got it all wrong.

- It's only an hypothesis,

but my reliability rating is .9944.

This definitive act of responsibility

unleashed what I call plague X.

I hypothesize that will end
when you cancel the election.

- Here's your choice,

keep these kids frozen
like this forever or

cancel the election.

- I always thought the
election was a bad idea.

Now, if you cancel it,

we can all go back to the Tower.

- I'd advise you to decide quickly.

Even in their frozen state,

I don't know how long
these kids will keep.

- How do we know canceling
the election will cure them?

The election didn't make us sick.

- That's because we were
ready to make the choice.

These kids aren't.

- The election is officially off.

You don't have to choose.

- Gross motor skills are resuming.

Liminal flexibility is stabilizing
and they're making noise.

And now the test of absolute wellness.

Shuffle.

Skill testing question, Shuffle.

Who in your own words should
be the leader of the world?

- Shuffle?

Fractal, he's freezing up again.

- Shuffle, it's okay.

You don't have to decide.

- They're cured.

The normal chaos can resume.

- [All Together] All right!

(cheering)

- Party!

- You did the right thing.

- It doesn't feel like it.

Chaos is fun.

There'll be hell to pay
when they run out of chip.

- That's where you come in.

They need someone to
make decisions for them.

- We should have turned me
into the leaders long time ago.

(music fades)

- [Kid] Who's in charge here?

(music begins)

- Helping kids

comes as naturally to me
as a monitor to groveling.

- Puff and polish, sir?

- Shuffle, what are you doing?

- To think you gave these brats
a chance to choose their own

leader and what do they do?

Freeze like rabbits in
the glare of a headlight.

That's why they need me.

They'll always need me.

- Welcome home, sir.

Here we go again.

- Jay, you should be sitting there.

- Did you really believe
your missionary of mercy

had the stuff to sit here?

- No one should be there.

Not unless it's someone
all the kids choose.

(laughs)

(beep) Finger.

I say we throw him over the wall.

You know, grownups have ways
of dealing with kids like you.

- Grownups might like Finger.

He's an accomplished liar and
has a superior capacity for

intimidation.

- Yeah, well I say we build a theme park.

We can call it Rezo World.

And charge kids admission.

- I'm sick and tired of
everybody always being afraid of

Finger.

- So how do we get another
kid to sit on the throne?

- The kids have to want to pick a leader.

- But they have to be
ready to make that choice

or they'll get sick again.

- We can use Finger.

Instead of kids being frozen with fear,

we can scare them into action.

So why are they voting Fractal?

- It's a little quiet,

but my research indicates
that voter turnout is heavily

influenced by fear of plague
and intimidation by monitors.

- Why are you making us do this again?

Nothing's changed.

- You've changed.

Now you're ready to make a choice.

- Don't make me laugh.

Fear never goes out of style.

- Finger, I was expecting you.

- Savage, you're a candidate.

What are you doing following
this guy around again?

- They're both on the lamb
from the reptile world.

- Frankly, these past few weeks,

I'm feeling extremely warm-blooded.

- Have you kids forgotten already?

Picking a leader will make you sick.

- We'll freeze up again.

- I mean, no matter what they call it,

you still have to choose.

- Not with you Finger.

- Well I could choose.

- Finger, you can't just slither in here

and tell us what to do.

- It's a free world.

For the moment, but hey, you know me,

you know what I'll do.

- He means it.

- Why should we choose?

- There is no choice.

- Okay?

Tomorrow we're going to get a
dozen roses and some of that

Belgian chocolate cake that
your mom likes for dessert?

- She doesn't like chocolate.

- Sure, she does.

Val loves chocolate.

- Not anymore.

- All right, well, we'll
get her whatever she likes.

Tomorrow is going to be perfect.

- Is this why you waited
seven years to come back?

Until it was going to be perfect?

Tomorrow you'll just
make up some other con

and another smile.

The dinners tonight.

You know where we live.

- We'll work it out, I promise.

- Every time you make a promise,

I have to make up an excuse.

I knew you faked your death.

I hid it from everyone.

Even from myself.

- That's what saved me, Jay.

I wouldn't be here today if
you hadn't covered for me.

- I was just a kid!

How could you do that to me?

- I didn't mean to hurt you.

- Then how come it took so
long for you to tell me that?

- You really changed, you're quite a man.

- You haven't changed a bit.

- But I'm still your dad,

so let's start over.

- Why?

- Because every boy needs his dad.

- When I made up stories about my dad,

he was more real than you.

I'm not going to tell you kids what to do,

but if you do nothing,
you're still making a choice.

You're choosing Finger.

So whatever you decide to do,
you're still taking a risk.

- No fair peaking.

- See?

Piece of cake.

It's just like wiping out Finger

and a squad of his monitors.

It's a little check mark.

You can do it, Shuffle.

Never dreamed it could be so easy.

- Not choosing is choosing.

I'm going to choose.

- You're, you're fooling yourself.

You can't choose your dreams.

- You can't choose your nightmares.

(laughs)

- Really nice dinner, mom, thanks.

- Your friend doesn't
know what they missed.

- Maybe it was too soon to ask.

- Well, you can always invite them again.

- I don't think so.

- Oh, did you guys have a fight?

- Sort of.

That's all right.

- Well, if you care for each
other, you can try again.

- How do you know when it's over?

- When you stop talking.

- Don't worry mom, it'll be okay.

It's going to be a roast
beef sandwiches for a month.

- Nobody voted for any of the candidates.

- After all that, they didn't get it.

- Maybe they did in their own way.

- No, I'm not a candidate.

- I liked what you said
and how you said it.

- It's unanimous.

- You earned it.

- You told us we had to
choose and we choose you.

- I love it when I'm right all along.

(clapping and cheering)