The Middle (2009–2018): Season 3, Episode 22 - The Clover - full transcript
Axl is going to the prom with Weird Ashley and is horrified when his friend Darrin asks Sue. Brick finds a 4-leaf clover and it brings him anything but good luck. One of Frankie's aunt accidentally starts a fire. Mike is too soft on Brick.
The first warm day of spring--
After being cooped up
all winter,
kids all over America
are bouncing off the walls
to get outside...
Except one.
Ahh!
Come on, Brick.
It's a nice day. Go outside.
Why are you punishing me?
You're not being punished.
You should want to
go outside and play.
No, thanks.
Okay, then you're being
punished. Go outside.
Ah, no book.
What do kids even do outside?
I don't know-- Run, frolic,
poke something with a stick...
What about Tina Rafferty?
Does she have a date?
Going with Brian Dalton.
That girl with the extra finger
who sits in the back
of American History?
Skater guy with the faux-hawk
asked her.
Would you guys shut up
about stupid prom?
Says the guy
who already has a date.
Whoa, Weird Ashley
is not a date. Okay?
She's a witch,
and she tricked me into going,
with her freaky mind powers.
Prom is gonna suck.
Why do I even
have to ask anybody?
There's too much pressure.
I don't want to deal
with all the prom-a drama.
I just want to dance.
You're not gonna
dance now, are you?
No. Gonna take a whiz.
You know, if I was gonna
ask somebody to the prom,
it would be Emily Anderson.
Ooh. Emily.
Oh, yeah.
I laid some major groundwork
at my folks' Christmas party,
but then I got busy--
Didn't close the deal.
I just wish there was
some way I could...
Put her on hold until after prom
so I don't miss my shot.
I mean, she's super hot.
Someone's gonna ask her...
Someone like... you.
What?
Wait, this is perfect.
Just stay with me here. Okay?
You take her to prom
and just hold her for me.
It's like pushing
the pause button
until I'm able to finish
what I started. Huh?
Come on, dude.
I would totally date
a hot chick you liked, for you.
Fine, but we're going
halfsies on the corsage.
Cool.
Now we just gotta
find a date for Darrin.
Not a problem. I got a date.
Yeah, right.
What'd you do?
Ask someone you met on the way
to the bathroom?
Darrin.
Do you like this color?
I was thinking
magenta for a dress
if you want to coordinate.
Aah!
I'm just a frosh
and I'm going to prom!
Okay, Aunt Edie.
I finally got her to go.
She went number three, so...
I'm just gonna
change her diaper,
bleach my hands,
and then hit the road.
What the-- Aunt Edie!
Aunt Edie...
Oh, no, thank you, dear.
I couldn't eat a thing.
Aunt Edie, I don't know
if you're okay here by yourself
anymore. I'm worried about you.
I'm worried about you.
You'll never get a man
if you can't cook.
You know,
if you ever get confused,
you can always call.
Remember we bought you
this new phone?
There's pictures of me
and Janet and mom on it.
So if you ever need help,
or you just want to talk to me,
all you have to do
is push my face.
Hello?
Don't know why you even
want it, dad. Doesn't work.
You never know
when you need a backup.
You already got
six busted dishwashers
sitting in your yard.
Now I got seven.
I'll just hoist it
up on the truck there,
and I'll be out of your hair.
Hang on. Let me do it.
Oh, no, I don't
want to be a bother.
Not a bother, dad.
If you have a heart attack
trying to move it,
that's gonna be a bother.
Well, don't scratch it.
Hi, dad.
Hi, Grandpa Big Mike.
Hey there, Brick.
I found a four-leaf clover.
It's good luck, you know.
See, Brick? You put down
the books for a second--
Can I be done
being outside now?
Fine.
Hang on.
What's that on your neck?
Looks like
you picked up a tick.
What?!
It's all right.
We'll get it out of there
with some tweezers,
and put some cream
or something on there.
If it's too deep,
we'll call the doctor.
Doctor? What are you
gonna call a doctor for?
I'll just burn it
off of him right here.
Uh, yeah.
I don't know how I feel about
burning things off my neck...
Or any place, really.
Relax, dad. We got it.
Well, all right,
but if that head buries,
you know what's gonna happen.
I don't!
What's gonna happen?!
I used to cut ticks
out of you all the time,
and you're still here,
aren't you?
I'm not burning
or cutting anything
off of or out of my son, okay?
Wow.
When did you get so soft?
Guess I always
wanted a daughter.
Dad. Enough.
I'm just saying, that's...
That's not how I raised you.
Don't talk about
how you raised me.
You weren't around
that much. Okay?
You didn't do that great a job.
Well, I guess...
I'm done here.
I'll just get on down the road.
Thanks for the dishwasher.
Uh, hello?
I'm still
very interested to know
what happens if the head buries.
Head buries.
Why? Why would you
ask my sister to the prom?
I don't know. She's nice.
She has a sunny disposition.
Dude, that's my sister
you're talking about.
Then you know what I mean.
No, Darrin. I don't know.
I don't know why you would ever
in a billion trillion years
think it was okay
to ask my sister out on a date.
It's not a date.
I just want someone to dance
with, who's nice to talk to,
and so does she. You should
get to know her sometime.
She's actually pretty cool.
Ohh.
Make it stop.
Hello?
Who's calling?
You are, Aunt Edie.
You're calling me again.
Do you need something?
Okay. I'm gonna let you go now.
How do I hang up?
The red button.
Just push the red button.
Got it.
Hello?
The red button.
Red button, red button,
red button.
She find the red button?
I don't know.
I found mine first.
I mean, we can't
float this any longer.
We gotta find somebody
to take care of Aunt Edie.
If not, she may have to
move in here.
Look harder.
I'm worried, Mike.
She almost
set her house on fire.
Oh, well, then, definitely,
move her in here.
Well, I have terrible news.
You've come to the right place.
The library's closing
due to budget cuts.
Oh, no. That's where I dump you
all summer for free babysitting.
What's happening to me?
First the tick,
then the library closing...
Then the paper cut I just got.
As soon as I got this clover,
my life started falling apart.
If you think about it,
there's really only one
plausible explanation.
This clover is evil.
Evil.
What about the lady
who took care of your dad
when he broke his hip?
Would he remember her name?
- I'm not talking to my dad anymore.
- Oh, gee.
What are you gonna do with
the extra four words a year?
Hey, Brick.
You'll never guess
what I found outside.
How lucky are you
that I saw it?
Hey,
we're interviewing a bunch of people
to take care of Aunt Edie,
and I can't find
any of the coffee mugs.
Have you seen any?
Thanks for your help.
How is it not helpful?
I went to get a mug.
There weren't any
in the cupboard, so I thought,
"what's the last thing
mom will ever use?"
Measuring cup. Eh? You're welcome.
Axl, do people at school
say they're "Going to prom"
or "Going to the prom"?
I've heard it both ways.
What does Darrin say?
We should probably match.
Oh, my God.
You should say you're not
going to the prom with Darrin.
It's a crime against nature.
What is your problem?
It's not like we're gonna
make out or anything.
Ugh, yeah,
thanks for that image.
Besides, if I was gonna
crush on any of your friends,
it would totally be Sean.
Are you trying to make me puke?
Although...
I suppose, if Darrin and I
really hit it off,
we could end up getting married,
and then I would be Mrs. Sue...
Darrin's last name.
You and I would be related.
- We are related.
- Then we'd be double related.
Oh, no.
- Yeah. You'd have to come to our house at Christmas.
- Oh, no! No. No, no, no. I'm not talking to you anymore.
- Stop. Get off the couch. Leave me alone.
- Hey. Hey, hey, hey.
Our Aunt Edie interviews
are starting,
so unless you want the job,
clear out.
You know, you should
really be nice to me,
or I'll never let little Darrin
or Amanda see their Uncle Axl!
So what made you want to apply
to be Aunt Edie's caregiver?
I saw in the ad,
she's into smoking and drinking,
and I'm like,
"this old lady likes to party."
Well, the ad said
I'd have my own room.
I just love old ladies.
Should probably get this out
right off the top.
I don't cook, so...
What kind of experience
do you have?
With partying? Tons.
Uh, not really any.
So she'd never come in my room,
right? Like, ever?
The older, the better, I say.
Another FYI--
I don't really clean, either.
Do you have any
questions for us?
What kind of meds is she on?
Anything good?
What kind of security system
does she have?
I mean, I...
I love old ladies...
A lot.
Wow.
So many good applicants.
I don't know
how we're gonna choose.
Sorry, Axl. I can't
go to prom with you anymore.
Are you serious?
Fred Fredman asked me.
His D&D character's
a ninth-level magic user, so...
Okay. No worries.
You two have a good time.
Thank you,
Fred Fredman. I'm free!
Nice.
Now I just gotta find Emily,
tell her she's getting
an upgrade. Sean?
You're the man.
I totally appreciate you
keeping her on ice for me, dude.
Uh, yeah.
That ice melted a bit.
My mom already called her mom,
they scheduled photos...
Plus we already rounded
a couple bases.
What? No!
That is so not cool.
I've been working on her
for a long time.
Oh, you mean when you were
asking Weird Ashley to prom?
I did ask her.
I was tricked.
I can't believe
you would do this to me.
I thought we were bros.
Bro. You can't ask him
to give up his date.
Oh, don't you dare "bro" me.
Bros don't ask
other bros' sisters to prom!
Everyone's got a date but me.
Hey, you can always
third-wheel with us.
I'd have to run it by Sue,
of course, but--
Wait a minute.
New idea forming.
What happens every year
at prom?
A baby gets born?
That was last year.
No. Think about it.
Couples break up.
There's always girls
crying in the bathroom.
It's guaranteed.
So in walks me, offering a very
handsome shoulder to cry on.
It's a major chick-atunity.
Dude, you're a genius.
Uh, yep. Ax-man's going stag.
Look out,
all you idiots with dates.
I'm gonna be king of the prom.
There you go. Sugar?
Oh, no, thank you.
I'm fine.
So you enjoy
taking care of people?
I guess you'd have to.
You've seen what we're paying.
Oh, I consider it a privilege.
I don't think folks realize
how much we have to learn
from our aging relatives.
Well, of course
they can be frustrating,
always thinking they know best,
but in the end, you forgive 'em
'cause they're your family,
and you love 'em.
And they won't be around
forever, right?
I remember one time
before he died, my dad--
Fine.
Well, obviously, Mike doesn't need to hear anything else...
And I think
you seem great, too, so...
Unless you have
any questions...
Actually, I do have one.
Your Aunt Edie doesn't smoke,
does she?
'Cause I really hate smoking.
She might...
Every once in a while.
Would she be willing to quit?
Would you be willing to start?
Hey, dad. Uh, when you were over
the other day, I know I...
Might have said something...
Oh? Didn't notice.
I think you did. Um...
I guess what I'm...
trying to say is, I'm sorry.
Came all this way to say sorry?
Yeah, dad. I did.
Wow.
You really have gone soft.
That's it.
Hey, mom.
Since this is my first
big high school dance,
I just wanted to go over
some ground rules with you
so you wouldn't be worried.
Oh, yes, I was definitely gonna
want to go over ground rules.
to check curfew recommendations
on their "How late? Debate."
Their rule of thumb
is 11:00 PM
unless you've earned
your parents' trust,
in which case, it'd be midnight.
Have I earned your trust, mom?
You have, but Darrin hasn't,
and he's just so dumb.
I'll see you at 11:00.
Mom, we gotta return these books
to the library
before it closes for good.
I wanted to warn you early
so we had time.
We have 14 minutes.
Brick.
Don't blame me.
Blame the clover.
13 minutes.
Let it ring.
Hi, Grandma Dot.
Hello, Brick.
Sad, isn't it?
The last drop-off.
Yeah. Me and this box have had
a lot of good times together.
I like to pretend
I'm feeding him.
Hey, mom? Can we give
Grandma Dot a ride home?
Oh, Brick, I have
enough old lady problems.
I don't have time
to go carting around s--
Hey there. Hop on in.
What are you going to do
now that you can't read
to the kids at the library,
Grandma Dot?
I don't really know.
It was a real surprise
when they announced the closing.
Such a shame. All those...
Maybe if I came into work late
Tuesdays and Thursdays,
I could check on Aunt Edie.
Everything seems
to be changing.
I was looking after my sister,
but recently she passed away.
I wonder if I could just
hide her down in our basement.
There's a TV. She could
come up for holidays...
Yep. My sister's gone.
The library's closed.
I have a lot of free time
at the moment, living all alone.
Why can't this woman
stop her yammering
so I can just figure this out?
Sweetie, do you mind terribly
if I have a smoke?
I don't want to jinx it, Mike,
but I might have solved
our Aunt Edie problem.
Great, that's two less
old people to worry about,
'cause I'm done with my dad.
And where the hell
are all the spoons?
Did you check the dishwasher?
The dishwasher.
Oh, that's it.
That's gotta be
where all our stuff is.
We left it
in the old dishwasher.
You know, just run
by your dad's and get it.
Nope.
I'm not going back there.
Fine, then I guess we'll just
go the rest of our lives
without spoons.
Fine by me.
♪ we set it off ♪
♪ tonight is the night,
is the night ♪
♪ that we're losing control ♪
♪ tonight is the night,
is the night ♪
♪ we set it off ♪
Whoo! Wow. You are, like,
a really good dancer.
Thanks.
I might have practiced.
Oh. The gym looks so magical.
Everyone looks so magical.
It's a magical night!
Hey. I heard you got
dumped by Weird Ashley.
I did not get dumped
by Weird Ashley!
The universe
corrected a situation
that never should have happened
in the first place, so...
Hey. Heather.
Getting your own pop, huh?
Ouch.
I thought Glenn was
cooler than that.
I'm sorry he can't
cherish you in the way
a hottie such as yourself
deserves to be cherished.
I hope you two can
get past this, but if you can't
and you need someone to talk to,
or just a shoulder to cry on...
♪ look at the sky
and get back there ♪
What?
All right, Brick. Go get 'em.
You're not gonna help me?
I'm gonna stay here.
You go.
Clover.
Hi, Grandpa Big Mike.
Dad says I'm supposed
to get our dishes
out of the old dishwasher.
Okay.
Looks like your dad's
finally got you doing
something for yourself.
You know, dad...
If you got a problem with
the way I'm raising my kids,
why don't you just say it?
Aw, it's not for me to say.
They're your kids.
Yeah. They are, dad-- my kids,
and you got a--
Stupid clover!
Hey, Brick, Brick!
What are you doing?
Be careful with that.
What?
Nothing.
No, you're right.
You're right. That is soft.
Brick? Forget the hammer.
How'd you like
to use a chain saw?
Here, let me
fire it up for you.
Um, I'm not even allowed
to use an electric toothbrush.
Aw, what are you worried about?
Your dad was using a chain saw
when he was half your age.
No, you know what?
Chain saws are for softies.
I bet we can do better,
huh, dad?
How about, uh,
how about the blowtorch?
Nothing wrong with a boy
learning how to use a blowtorch.
Go ahead, Brick.
Your grandpa's gonna
make you a man.
Thanks, but I think
I'll stay a boy for now.
Come on. It's just 3,000 degrees
of searing heat--
Nothing to be afraid of.
And grandpa says it's okay.
Teach him
how to use it properly,
I don't think
it's such a big deal.
Okay.
What's it gonna be, Brick?
Chain saw or blowtorch?
Fire or steel?
You know,
I'm thinking the clover might
not be the source of the curse
after all.
I think it might be genetics.
At least now I get to
keep the four-leaf clover.
They're actually kind of rare.
Uh-oh.
Where'd it go?
♪ you and me ♪
♪ we are sharing possibilities ♪
Oh, my God.
Can you believe he dumped her
like that on the phone?
Yeah, that is so not cool.
I feel so bad for her.
♪ Surprising even me ♪
♪ with its endless ♪
♪ possibilities ♪
♪ I don't believe in fate ♪
♪ 'cause we're not written
in the stars ♪
♪ you won't see our story ♪
What is luck?
Is there such a thing?
♪ In a crystal ball ♪
Maybe luck is having someone
there when you need 'em...
Or more than one person,
if you're really lucky.
Aw, you're not gonna
spend all night
looking for his silly clover,
are you?
Wouldn't have caught me doing
that for you when you was a kid.
I know.
Hang on, son. I think maybe
I have another flashlight
around here somewhere.
In Aunt Edie's case,
she found someone who had it
together from the neck up,
while she had it together
from the neck down.
What was I getting again?
The remote, an ashtray,
and you were gonna
turn off the stove.
Ha ha! Yes. That's right.
And if that's not luck,
I don't know what is.
After being cooped up
all winter,
kids all over America
are bouncing off the walls
to get outside...
Except one.
Ahh!
Come on, Brick.
It's a nice day. Go outside.
Why are you punishing me?
You're not being punished.
You should want to
go outside and play.
No, thanks.
Okay, then you're being
punished. Go outside.
Ah, no book.
What do kids even do outside?
I don't know-- Run, frolic,
poke something with a stick...
What about Tina Rafferty?
Does she have a date?
Going with Brian Dalton.
That girl with the extra finger
who sits in the back
of American History?
Skater guy with the faux-hawk
asked her.
Would you guys shut up
about stupid prom?
Says the guy
who already has a date.
Whoa, Weird Ashley
is not a date. Okay?
She's a witch,
and she tricked me into going,
with her freaky mind powers.
Prom is gonna suck.
Why do I even
have to ask anybody?
There's too much pressure.
I don't want to deal
with all the prom-a drama.
I just want to dance.
You're not gonna
dance now, are you?
No. Gonna take a whiz.
You know, if I was gonna
ask somebody to the prom,
it would be Emily Anderson.
Ooh. Emily.
Oh, yeah.
I laid some major groundwork
at my folks' Christmas party,
but then I got busy--
Didn't close the deal.
I just wish there was
some way I could...
Put her on hold until after prom
so I don't miss my shot.
I mean, she's super hot.
Someone's gonna ask her...
Someone like... you.
What?
Wait, this is perfect.
Just stay with me here. Okay?
You take her to prom
and just hold her for me.
It's like pushing
the pause button
until I'm able to finish
what I started. Huh?
Come on, dude.
I would totally date
a hot chick you liked, for you.
Fine, but we're going
halfsies on the corsage.
Cool.
Now we just gotta
find a date for Darrin.
Not a problem. I got a date.
Yeah, right.
What'd you do?
Ask someone you met on the way
to the bathroom?
Darrin.
Do you like this color?
I was thinking
magenta for a dress
if you want to coordinate.
Aah!
I'm just a frosh
and I'm going to prom!
Okay, Aunt Edie.
I finally got her to go.
She went number three, so...
I'm just gonna
change her diaper,
bleach my hands,
and then hit the road.
What the-- Aunt Edie!
Aunt Edie...
Oh, no, thank you, dear.
I couldn't eat a thing.
Aunt Edie, I don't know
if you're okay here by yourself
anymore. I'm worried about you.
I'm worried about you.
You'll never get a man
if you can't cook.
You know,
if you ever get confused,
you can always call.
Remember we bought you
this new phone?
There's pictures of me
and Janet and mom on it.
So if you ever need help,
or you just want to talk to me,
all you have to do
is push my face.
Hello?
Don't know why you even
want it, dad. Doesn't work.
You never know
when you need a backup.
You already got
six busted dishwashers
sitting in your yard.
Now I got seven.
I'll just hoist it
up on the truck there,
and I'll be out of your hair.
Hang on. Let me do it.
Oh, no, I don't
want to be a bother.
Not a bother, dad.
If you have a heart attack
trying to move it,
that's gonna be a bother.
Well, don't scratch it.
Hi, dad.
Hi, Grandpa Big Mike.
Hey there, Brick.
I found a four-leaf clover.
It's good luck, you know.
See, Brick? You put down
the books for a second--
Can I be done
being outside now?
Fine.
Hang on.
What's that on your neck?
Looks like
you picked up a tick.
What?!
It's all right.
We'll get it out of there
with some tweezers,
and put some cream
or something on there.
If it's too deep,
we'll call the doctor.
Doctor? What are you
gonna call a doctor for?
I'll just burn it
off of him right here.
Uh, yeah.
I don't know how I feel about
burning things off my neck...
Or any place, really.
Relax, dad. We got it.
Well, all right,
but if that head buries,
you know what's gonna happen.
I don't!
What's gonna happen?!
I used to cut ticks
out of you all the time,
and you're still here,
aren't you?
I'm not burning
or cutting anything
off of or out of my son, okay?
Wow.
When did you get so soft?
Guess I always
wanted a daughter.
Dad. Enough.
I'm just saying, that's...
That's not how I raised you.
Don't talk about
how you raised me.
You weren't around
that much. Okay?
You didn't do that great a job.
Well, I guess...
I'm done here.
I'll just get on down the road.
Thanks for the dishwasher.
Uh, hello?
I'm still
very interested to know
what happens if the head buries.
Head buries.
Why? Why would you
ask my sister to the prom?
I don't know. She's nice.
She has a sunny disposition.
Dude, that's my sister
you're talking about.
Then you know what I mean.
No, Darrin. I don't know.
I don't know why you would ever
in a billion trillion years
think it was okay
to ask my sister out on a date.
It's not a date.
I just want someone to dance
with, who's nice to talk to,
and so does she. You should
get to know her sometime.
She's actually pretty cool.
Ohh.
Make it stop.
Hello?
Who's calling?
You are, Aunt Edie.
You're calling me again.
Do you need something?
Okay. I'm gonna let you go now.
How do I hang up?
The red button.
Just push the red button.
Got it.
Hello?
The red button.
Red button, red button,
red button.
She find the red button?
I don't know.
I found mine first.
I mean, we can't
float this any longer.
We gotta find somebody
to take care of Aunt Edie.
If not, she may have to
move in here.
Look harder.
I'm worried, Mike.
She almost
set her house on fire.
Oh, well, then, definitely,
move her in here.
Well, I have terrible news.
You've come to the right place.
The library's closing
due to budget cuts.
Oh, no. That's where I dump you
all summer for free babysitting.
What's happening to me?
First the tick,
then the library closing...
Then the paper cut I just got.
As soon as I got this clover,
my life started falling apart.
If you think about it,
there's really only one
plausible explanation.
This clover is evil.
Evil.
What about the lady
who took care of your dad
when he broke his hip?
Would he remember her name?
- I'm not talking to my dad anymore.
- Oh, gee.
What are you gonna do with
the extra four words a year?
Hey, Brick.
You'll never guess
what I found outside.
How lucky are you
that I saw it?
Hey,
we're interviewing a bunch of people
to take care of Aunt Edie,
and I can't find
any of the coffee mugs.
Have you seen any?
Thanks for your help.
How is it not helpful?
I went to get a mug.
There weren't any
in the cupboard, so I thought,
"what's the last thing
mom will ever use?"
Measuring cup. Eh? You're welcome.
Axl, do people at school
say they're "Going to prom"
or "Going to the prom"?
I've heard it both ways.
What does Darrin say?
We should probably match.
Oh, my God.
You should say you're not
going to the prom with Darrin.
It's a crime against nature.
What is your problem?
It's not like we're gonna
make out or anything.
Ugh, yeah,
thanks for that image.
Besides, if I was gonna
crush on any of your friends,
it would totally be Sean.
Are you trying to make me puke?
Although...
I suppose, if Darrin and I
really hit it off,
we could end up getting married,
and then I would be Mrs. Sue...
Darrin's last name.
You and I would be related.
- We are related.
- Then we'd be double related.
Oh, no.
- Yeah. You'd have to come to our house at Christmas.
- Oh, no! No. No, no, no. I'm not talking to you anymore.
- Stop. Get off the couch. Leave me alone.
- Hey. Hey, hey, hey.
Our Aunt Edie interviews
are starting,
so unless you want the job,
clear out.
You know, you should
really be nice to me,
or I'll never let little Darrin
or Amanda see their Uncle Axl!
So what made you want to apply
to be Aunt Edie's caregiver?
I saw in the ad,
she's into smoking and drinking,
and I'm like,
"this old lady likes to party."
Well, the ad said
I'd have my own room.
I just love old ladies.
Should probably get this out
right off the top.
I don't cook, so...
What kind of experience
do you have?
With partying? Tons.
Uh, not really any.
So she'd never come in my room,
right? Like, ever?
The older, the better, I say.
Another FYI--
I don't really clean, either.
Do you have any
questions for us?
What kind of meds is she on?
Anything good?
What kind of security system
does she have?
I mean, I...
I love old ladies...
A lot.
Wow.
So many good applicants.
I don't know
how we're gonna choose.
Sorry, Axl. I can't
go to prom with you anymore.
Are you serious?
Fred Fredman asked me.
His D&D character's
a ninth-level magic user, so...
Okay. No worries.
You two have a good time.
Thank you,
Fred Fredman. I'm free!
Nice.
Now I just gotta find Emily,
tell her she's getting
an upgrade. Sean?
You're the man.
I totally appreciate you
keeping her on ice for me, dude.
Uh, yeah.
That ice melted a bit.
My mom already called her mom,
they scheduled photos...
Plus we already rounded
a couple bases.
What? No!
That is so not cool.
I've been working on her
for a long time.
Oh, you mean when you were
asking Weird Ashley to prom?
I did ask her.
I was tricked.
I can't believe
you would do this to me.
I thought we were bros.
Bro. You can't ask him
to give up his date.
Oh, don't you dare "bro" me.
Bros don't ask
other bros' sisters to prom!
Everyone's got a date but me.
Hey, you can always
third-wheel with us.
I'd have to run it by Sue,
of course, but--
Wait a minute.
New idea forming.
What happens every year
at prom?
A baby gets born?
That was last year.
No. Think about it.
Couples break up.
There's always girls
crying in the bathroom.
It's guaranteed.
So in walks me, offering a very
handsome shoulder to cry on.
It's a major chick-atunity.
Dude, you're a genius.
Uh, yep. Ax-man's going stag.
Look out,
all you idiots with dates.
I'm gonna be king of the prom.
There you go. Sugar?
Oh, no, thank you.
I'm fine.
So you enjoy
taking care of people?
I guess you'd have to.
You've seen what we're paying.
Oh, I consider it a privilege.
I don't think folks realize
how much we have to learn
from our aging relatives.
Well, of course
they can be frustrating,
always thinking they know best,
but in the end, you forgive 'em
'cause they're your family,
and you love 'em.
And they won't be around
forever, right?
I remember one time
before he died, my dad--
Fine.
Well, obviously, Mike doesn't need to hear anything else...
And I think
you seem great, too, so...
Unless you have
any questions...
Actually, I do have one.
Your Aunt Edie doesn't smoke,
does she?
'Cause I really hate smoking.
She might...
Every once in a while.
Would she be willing to quit?
Would you be willing to start?
Hey, dad. Uh, when you were over
the other day, I know I...
Might have said something...
Oh? Didn't notice.
I think you did. Um...
I guess what I'm...
trying to say is, I'm sorry.
Came all this way to say sorry?
Yeah, dad. I did.
Wow.
You really have gone soft.
That's it.
Hey, mom.
Since this is my first
big high school dance,
I just wanted to go over
some ground rules with you
so you wouldn't be worried.
Oh, yes, I was definitely gonna
want to go over ground rules.
to check curfew recommendations
on their "How late? Debate."
Their rule of thumb
is 11:00 PM
unless you've earned
your parents' trust,
in which case, it'd be midnight.
Have I earned your trust, mom?
You have, but Darrin hasn't,
and he's just so dumb.
I'll see you at 11:00.
Mom, we gotta return these books
to the library
before it closes for good.
I wanted to warn you early
so we had time.
We have 14 minutes.
Brick.
Don't blame me.
Blame the clover.
13 minutes.
Let it ring.
Hi, Grandma Dot.
Hello, Brick.
Sad, isn't it?
The last drop-off.
Yeah. Me and this box have had
a lot of good times together.
I like to pretend
I'm feeding him.
Hey, mom? Can we give
Grandma Dot a ride home?
Oh, Brick, I have
enough old lady problems.
I don't have time
to go carting around s--
Hey there. Hop on in.
What are you going to do
now that you can't read
to the kids at the library,
Grandma Dot?
I don't really know.
It was a real surprise
when they announced the closing.
Such a shame. All those...
Maybe if I came into work late
Tuesdays and Thursdays,
I could check on Aunt Edie.
Everything seems
to be changing.
I was looking after my sister,
but recently she passed away.
I wonder if I could just
hide her down in our basement.
There's a TV. She could
come up for holidays...
Yep. My sister's gone.
The library's closed.
I have a lot of free time
at the moment, living all alone.
Why can't this woman
stop her yammering
so I can just figure this out?
Sweetie, do you mind terribly
if I have a smoke?
I don't want to jinx it, Mike,
but I might have solved
our Aunt Edie problem.
Great, that's two less
old people to worry about,
'cause I'm done with my dad.
And where the hell
are all the spoons?
Did you check the dishwasher?
The dishwasher.
Oh, that's it.
That's gotta be
where all our stuff is.
We left it
in the old dishwasher.
You know, just run
by your dad's and get it.
Nope.
I'm not going back there.
Fine, then I guess we'll just
go the rest of our lives
without spoons.
Fine by me.
♪ we set it off ♪
♪ tonight is the night,
is the night ♪
♪ that we're losing control ♪
♪ tonight is the night,
is the night ♪
♪ we set it off ♪
Whoo! Wow. You are, like,
a really good dancer.
Thanks.
I might have practiced.
Oh. The gym looks so magical.
Everyone looks so magical.
It's a magical night!
Hey. I heard you got
dumped by Weird Ashley.
I did not get dumped
by Weird Ashley!
The universe
corrected a situation
that never should have happened
in the first place, so...
Hey. Heather.
Getting your own pop, huh?
Ouch.
I thought Glenn was
cooler than that.
I'm sorry he can't
cherish you in the way
a hottie such as yourself
deserves to be cherished.
I hope you two can
get past this, but if you can't
and you need someone to talk to,
or just a shoulder to cry on...
♪ look at the sky
and get back there ♪
What?
All right, Brick. Go get 'em.
You're not gonna help me?
I'm gonna stay here.
You go.
Clover.
Hi, Grandpa Big Mike.
Dad says I'm supposed
to get our dishes
out of the old dishwasher.
Okay.
Looks like your dad's
finally got you doing
something for yourself.
You know, dad...
If you got a problem with
the way I'm raising my kids,
why don't you just say it?
Aw, it's not for me to say.
They're your kids.
Yeah. They are, dad-- my kids,
and you got a--
Stupid clover!
Hey, Brick, Brick!
What are you doing?
Be careful with that.
What?
Nothing.
No, you're right.
You're right. That is soft.
Brick? Forget the hammer.
How'd you like
to use a chain saw?
Here, let me
fire it up for you.
Um, I'm not even allowed
to use an electric toothbrush.
Aw, what are you worried about?
Your dad was using a chain saw
when he was half your age.
No, you know what?
Chain saws are for softies.
I bet we can do better,
huh, dad?
How about, uh,
how about the blowtorch?
Nothing wrong with a boy
learning how to use a blowtorch.
Go ahead, Brick.
Your grandpa's gonna
make you a man.
Thanks, but I think
I'll stay a boy for now.
Come on. It's just 3,000 degrees
of searing heat--
Nothing to be afraid of.
And grandpa says it's okay.
Teach him
how to use it properly,
I don't think
it's such a big deal.
Okay.
What's it gonna be, Brick?
Chain saw or blowtorch?
Fire or steel?
You know,
I'm thinking the clover might
not be the source of the curse
after all.
I think it might be genetics.
At least now I get to
keep the four-leaf clover.
They're actually kind of rare.
Uh-oh.
Where'd it go?
♪ you and me ♪
♪ we are sharing possibilities ♪
Oh, my God.
Can you believe he dumped her
like that on the phone?
Yeah, that is so not cool.
I feel so bad for her.
♪ Surprising even me ♪
♪ with its endless ♪
♪ possibilities ♪
♪ I don't believe in fate ♪
♪ 'cause we're not written
in the stars ♪
♪ you won't see our story ♪
What is luck?
Is there such a thing?
♪ In a crystal ball ♪
Maybe luck is having someone
there when you need 'em...
Or more than one person,
if you're really lucky.
Aw, you're not gonna
spend all night
looking for his silly clover,
are you?
Wouldn't have caught me doing
that for you when you was a kid.
I know.
Hang on, son. I think maybe
I have another flashlight
around here somewhere.
In Aunt Edie's case,
she found someone who had it
together from the neck up,
while she had it together
from the neck down.
What was I getting again?
The remote, an ashtray,
and you were gonna
turn off the stove.
Ha ha! Yes. That's right.
And if that's not luck,
I don't know what is.