The Mask (1995–1997): Season 2, Episode 7 - Mask au Gratin - full transcript
[theme song]
d I gotcha with
my winnin' smile d
d I'm a livin' lesson
in flair and style d
d You just can't help
but stare at my savoir-faire d
d I'm nouveau
Deco Roman-Greco d
d Rococo Barroco be-bop
hip-hop flip-flop d
d Somebody stop me d
d Pretty viridian
faces like mine d
d Don't come a dime a dozen
I stand out of the crowd d
d Babe when they made me
yeah they broke the mold d
d Wholesome and kind staid and
refined totally out of my mind d
d Arch-villains
and ne'er-do-wells d
d Had better learn
to decorate prison cells d
d Green goes with anything
if they ask see d
d Well there's one last thing
I gotta sing about d
d Open up wide
and really shout d
d Whoa look out d
d This is the Mask dd
Smokin'!
[birds chirping]
[Mrs. Peenman]
'Ipkiss!'
[snoring]
Huh, uh, what?
Oh, somethin' tells me I didn't
get much sleep last night, Milo.
[whining]
[Mrs. Peenman]
'I know you're in there,
Ipkiss!'
'I can hear you.'
Uh, and I thought old bats
were supposed to be deaf.
[knocking on door]
Why, Mrs. Peenman, hi!
Now, look I know
I'm five days late on the rent
but, uh, you know,
the bills have been piling up
and I'm a little short on cash--
Never mind the rent, Ipkiss!
I got a proposition for you.
My niece Jennifer is coming
to town this afternoon
to visit for a couple of days.
Unfortunately, I gotta prepare
for my big paintball tournament
can't spend much time with her
and she don't know
a soul in town.
Uh-huh, so-so-so wh-what does
that have to do with, uh..
Oh, no, no, hold on.
You take her out,
show her around
and you can skip
this month's rent
or else consider
yourself evicted.
Ipkiss, take your elbows
off the table
sit up straight,
I don't go out with slackers.
Stop drooling! Ipkiss?
[Mrs. Peenman]
'Ipkiss? I don't have all day.'
'Is it a deal or not?'
'Ipkiss?'
Huh? Oh, uh, yes, yes.
Of course, I'd love to take
Jennifer out, Mrs. Peenman.
[chuckles]
Then, be ready at 4 p.m. sharp.
I don't like stragglers!
[Ipkiss groaning]
[Milo panting]
[clock ticking]
[Mrs. Peenman]
'It's 4 o'clock, Ipkiss!'
'Jennifer's here!'
Look out, Milo.
Dead man walkin'.
[instrumental music]
Well, uh..
H-h-hello.
Oh, you must be J-J-J-Jennifer
and, uh, I guess
that makes me--
[chuckles]
You're Stanley.
Um, Auntie Pee, he is so sweet.
He better be.
You ready, Ipkiss?
Yeah, sure, I'm-I'm ready.
Ready to go!
And here.. Uh, oh, boy.
You be extra careful
crossing streets.
Don't talk to strangers.
And you better have Jennifer
back home early. You got me?
A-Auntie Pee,
honestly, we'll be fine.
And you keep your creepo
hands off my niece, Ipkiss
or else..
[indistinct chatter]
Wow, Jennifer.
You know, I don't think
I've ever met
an archaeologist before.
Must be really interesting.
Yeah, well, it definitely
has its moments.
I just flew in from a dig
at an ancient Mesopotamian tomb.
Oh, you wanna see the pictures?
Yeah, you bet!
See what I've got here.
Oh! This is me.
Here I am entering
Gorgonzola's tomb.
And this is the hall
of a thousand cows.
And this is when I removed
Gorgonzola's amulet.
No one had seen it
for over 4000 years.
See, it's actually a wedge
of cheese encased in amber.
So, who is this Gorgonzola?
Legend has it that
she was the evil
half sister of Parmesano
the greatest dairy farmer
in Mesopotamia.
After she got caught trying
to steal her brother's riches
she became an outcast,
shunned by society.
She went mad and vowed
that some day
she would get her revenge.
Must've have been
lactose intolerant.
Wow!
I haven't quite finished
translating the inscription
but there is supposedly a curse
on whoever removes
it from the tomb.
Some kind of,
transformation that occurs
when the moon
is in its third quarter.
But, but,
you're the one who removed it.
[chuckles]
Oh, come on, Stanley
all that stuff about curses
and-and transformations
is just silly superstition.
[grunting]
[chuckles]
Yeah, yeah, right,
I mean, you know.
What a bunch of hooey.
[instrumental music]
Oh!
My goodness,
I-I suddenly feel so..
...lightheaded.
You do? Uh, uh, here, here,
you-you sit down.
[sighs]
I-I guess it's just
been a long day
you know, traveling and all.
Maybe-maybe it's just jetlag.
Yeah, y-you wait here, okay.
I'm going to run
to the convenience store
down the street and I'm gonna
get you some water.
Oh, so sweet of you, Stanley.
[dramatic music]
[crackling]
[screams]
After 4000 years
Gorgonzola walks
the Earth once more.
And now, I shall take my revenge
upon the mortals who treated me
like so much spoiled milk.
Pretzels! Get yourself pretzels!
Oh, I shall have mine
with...cheese.
[laughing]
zap
[screaming]
[laughing]
Payback time, mortals!
Vengeance is mine.
Alright, you weirdo,
you're comin' Downtown.
Oh, I think not, copper.
Gorgonzola shall never
be locked up again.
[laughing]
[Ipkiss]
Okay, here you go, Jennifer
just call me Gunga Din.
Nice cold bottle of, uh..
J-Jen-Jennifer?
[instrumental music]
[laughs]
Let every mortal shudder
at the power of Gorgonzola.
I shall destroy your world.
[zapping]
[crackling]
[tires screeching]
We are live
at the Edge City Bridge
which has just been
turned to cheese
by the creature who calls
herself Gorgonzola.
What we're witnessin'
is the most powerful
destructive force
that Edge City has ever--
Hey!
I thought I was
the big cheese in town.
Now anymore, Gorgonzola is far
more powerful than you.
This cheese woman stinks,
me thinks.
Now, let me to my task
for nobody upstages
The Mask!
[intense music]
Ohh, careful, oh!
[The Mask]
'Must be a van, ouch!'
thud
This mold faced meddler
shall get a taste
of my extra sharp cheddar.
whoosh
[hissing]
Somebody poked me!
[laughs]
Now, that should
take care of.. Oh!
No, no, no, no,
you have to lie down, please
or else the therapy won't work.
[instrumental music]
So, how long have you
had this obsession
with turning stuff
into...cheese.
- You dare mock me?
- "You dare mock me?"
- Stop it!
- "Stop it!"
Annoying, aren't I?
But you know
what's really annoying?
[gibberish]
prrrt prrrt prrrt
[flatulating]
But wait, there's more.
swoosh
[screeching]
[screams]
The noise!
Big smile, now!
Say cheese!
Aaah!
Cheese wedgie!
Ah!
Nobody wedgies Gorgonzola.
[zapping]
[zapping]
[crackling]
[laughing]
Now that's a cheese wedgie.
[cracking]
[zipper opening]
Sorry, that's just
not my color.
You got anythin' in a nice
blue cheese.
None are impervious
to my powers.
It's im-impossible!
[zapping]
Your offendable rays
can't harm me.
For I am lactose intolerant man!
[instrumental music]
[zapping]
[crackling]
Crush that green faced fool!
[engine revving]
[horn honking]
[whirring]
The all new Mask
saw bearer.
It slices, it dices!
[music continues]
I really cut the cheese
that time, huh?
Didn't see that comin',
did ya?
I've had enough of you!
Oh, just when we were getting
to know each other so well.
Aaah!
[instrumental music]
[upbeat music]
[screams]
thud
Whoa, I thought
green hair was cool
but this dude's got
it all happenin'.
Yeah.
[Mask gibbering]
He is totally out there.
[upbeat music]
[grunts]
[groans]
Yeah, mosh pit!
Kickin'!
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
Now I ask you,
could I be anymore hip?
[screams]
These horrible sounds!
What's her problem?
[screams]
Oh, well, you know
she's more of that
new-age music scene.
You're gonna miss a great party!
Shake it, sister, shake it!
[snoring]
[alarm buzzing]
[Milo growling]
[yawning]
Wow! What a weird dream.
Well, the whole city
was being turned
into cheese
by a hideous monster.
[chuckles]
Oh, yeah,
that's pretty silly, huh?
[screams]
[woman on TV]
'And the city is in chaos'
'after Gorgonzola's
all night rampage'
turned half the Downtown area
into so much Muenster.
Wait a minute!
Gorgonzola and that amulet.
It looks just like the one--
[Mrs. Peenman]
'Ipkiss!'
[knocking on door]
'Ipkiss!'
What have you done to my niece?
- D-d-done?
- Hmm!
Well, I don't know why,
but Jennifer likes you.
Now, listen up!
I've set up a carriage drive
for the two of you
to Landfill Park this afternoon.
And then you're gonna
take her to the football game
at Edge Stadium tonight.
This way,
I'll know where you are.
Tonight, well, uh, gee, that,
that is really g-generous of you
but I-I-I..
I-I-I nothin'!
You don't keep
your end of the deal
then you can start packin'.
'Cause you'll be out
on the street tonight!
[Ipkiss chuckles]
[sighing]
Sounds like fun, Mrs. Peenman.
[crickets chirping]
[horse neighing]
Stanley, hi.
You know, I'm so sorry
for disappearing on you
like that last night.
Y-yeah.
Um, where did you go?
Well, to be honest,
I-I don't know.
You know, I can hardly remember
getting back to my aunt's
apartment.
Uh, Jen-Jennifer
I think there's something you
should know about the amulet.
Oh, oh, Stanley,
I forgot to tell you
I finished translating
the inscription.
[Jennifer]
Climb in,
I'll tell you all about it.
[horse neighing]
The inscription
says that in the light
of the third quarter moon
the bearer of the amulet
transforms into--
Some kind of nasty-looking
monster
with awesome destructive
dairy related powers?
How did you know that?
[chuckles]
Just a crazy hunch.
Y-y-you know, Jennifer,
you really
ought to return that thing
to its tomb.
Oh, Stanley,
don't be ridiculous.
[yawning]
Oh, my, the ride is making
me so, um, so drowsy.
Hmm.
I need to get that amulet
off her before..
[crackling]
What of the amulet?
You wouldn't be thinking of
returning it to my tomb,
in order to imprison me again
would you?
N-no, no, no, no,
of course not.
I-I mean, the-the-the thought
never crossed my--
Liar! Prepare to meet
your cheesy doom.
[galloping]
Oh!
[zapping]
[screams]
[panting]
I thought you might
come in handy.
[zapping]
Mmm, tickets to a stadium.
[chuckles]
A chance to curdle thousands
of mortals in one fell swoop.
[laughs]
Aah! How delightful.
[instrumental music]
[crickets chirping]
Wow, cool-lookin' mask.
Hey, kinda looks like you
on a bad night.
Hey! It's mine, give it back!
[laughs]
Oh!
[laughs]
What a dorky-lookin' statue.
Hey, maybe this will
improve his looks.
[thunder crashing]
Cheezin'!
Now, alright, you punks
I'm gonna have
to blow you away, see.
[fan whirring]
[screaming]
[blows air]
And away, we go!
[crowd cheering]
Man, these get-ups
get wilder every year.
[man on PA]
'It's third in 15, sports fans.'
'And all teams gonna need
a big pass play.'
'Ayer takes the snappin'..'
'My, oh, my, it's the old
Statue of Liberty play.'
Wait, just one doggone minute.
Somethin' cheesy
is goin' on here.
You bet it is.
Attention, attention, mortals!
The last thing you smell
will be the sweet
stench of my revenge.
[zapping]
[crackling]
[zapping]
[laughs]
Alright, Gorgonzola,
come out with your hands up!
It's the SWAT team!
[instrumental music]
whip
thud
[man on PA]
'The Mask snaps the ball
back to..'
'...The Mask!'
'He hurls the ball
into the end zone to..'
'...The Mask.'
'He's got her, he doesn't'
'he does, he doesn't.'
'My, oh, my, that was unmanly!'
[crowd cheering]
Perhaps, you have an appetite
for some of my string cheese.
[screams]
Maybe later,
I'm a little uptight right now.
[grunts]
Oh! Ow-ow! Whoa! Whoa!
[whirring]
Round up time.
And I'm a gonna rope
me a cheese doggy.
Yee-haw!
thud
Hope you had a pleasant flight.
Bye-bye, bye-bye!
[machine whirring]
[screams]
[birds chirping]
I know I've been a rotten kid,
Miss Cheese Lady
but please, please, please
don't zap me
'with that cheesy
stare of yours again.'
[instrumental music]
On account of,
I'm so weak from our battle
it would turn me into cheese
this time for sure.
Oh, really.
[slurping]
[zapping]
Back at you..
No!
[instrumental music]
This little piggy needs
to go all the way home.
[whirring]
[screams]
[instrumental music]
[buzzing]
Whoa, oh.
Now, I get to play hero
with Stanley's girl.
Ipkiss, I told you to get
my niece home early.
Wait till I get
my hands on you!
On the other hand..
...why not let Stanley get
the credit for saving the girl.
[thunder crashing]
Jennifer! It's you!
[chuckles]
Well, of course it's me,
Stanley.
Who-who were you expecting?
Well, uh, nobody.
How in the world
did we get here?
It's a re-e-ally long story.
Well, do you think maybe you
could tell me over breakfast?
I suddenly got a craving
for a thick drippy
triple cheese omelet.
[gulps]
[theme music]
d I gotcha with
my winnin' smile d
d I'm a livin' lesson
in flair and style d
d You just can't help
but stare at my savoir-faire d
d I'm nouveau
Deco Roman-Greco d
d Rococo Barroco be-bop
hip-hop flip-flop d
d Somebody stop me d
d Pretty viridian
faces like mine d
d Don't come a dime a dozen
I stand out of the crowd d
d Babe when they made me
yeah they broke the mold d
d Wholesome and kind staid and
refined totally out of my mind d
d Arch-villains
and ne'er-do-wells d
d Had better learn
to decorate prison cells d
d Green goes with anything
if they ask see d
d Well there's one last thing
I gotta sing about d
d Open up wide
and really shout d
d Whoa look out d
d This is the Mask dd
Smokin'!
[birds chirping]
[Mrs. Peenman]
'Ipkiss!'
[snoring]
Huh, uh, what?
Oh, somethin' tells me I didn't
get much sleep last night, Milo.
[whining]
[Mrs. Peenman]
'I know you're in there,
Ipkiss!'
'I can hear you.'
Uh, and I thought old bats
were supposed to be deaf.
[knocking on door]
Why, Mrs. Peenman, hi!
Now, look I know
I'm five days late on the rent
but, uh, you know,
the bills have been piling up
and I'm a little short on cash--
Never mind the rent, Ipkiss!
I got a proposition for you.
My niece Jennifer is coming
to town this afternoon
to visit for a couple of days.
Unfortunately, I gotta prepare
for my big paintball tournament
can't spend much time with her
and she don't know
a soul in town.
Uh-huh, so-so-so wh-what does
that have to do with, uh..
Oh, no, no, hold on.
You take her out,
show her around
and you can skip
this month's rent
or else consider
yourself evicted.
Ipkiss, take your elbows
off the table
sit up straight,
I don't go out with slackers.
Stop drooling! Ipkiss?
[Mrs. Peenman]
'Ipkiss? I don't have all day.'
'Is it a deal or not?'
'Ipkiss?'
Huh? Oh, uh, yes, yes.
Of course, I'd love to take
Jennifer out, Mrs. Peenman.
[chuckles]
Then, be ready at 4 p.m. sharp.
I don't like stragglers!
[Ipkiss groaning]
[Milo panting]
[clock ticking]
[Mrs. Peenman]
'It's 4 o'clock, Ipkiss!'
'Jennifer's here!'
Look out, Milo.
Dead man walkin'.
[instrumental music]
Well, uh..
H-h-hello.
Oh, you must be J-J-J-Jennifer
and, uh, I guess
that makes me--
[chuckles]
You're Stanley.
Um, Auntie Pee, he is so sweet.
He better be.
You ready, Ipkiss?
Yeah, sure, I'm-I'm ready.
Ready to go!
And here.. Uh, oh, boy.
You be extra careful
crossing streets.
Don't talk to strangers.
And you better have Jennifer
back home early. You got me?
A-Auntie Pee,
honestly, we'll be fine.
And you keep your creepo
hands off my niece, Ipkiss
or else..
[indistinct chatter]
Wow, Jennifer.
You know, I don't think
I've ever met
an archaeologist before.
Must be really interesting.
Yeah, well, it definitely
has its moments.
I just flew in from a dig
at an ancient Mesopotamian tomb.
Oh, you wanna see the pictures?
Yeah, you bet!
See what I've got here.
Oh! This is me.
Here I am entering
Gorgonzola's tomb.
And this is the hall
of a thousand cows.
And this is when I removed
Gorgonzola's amulet.
No one had seen it
for over 4000 years.
See, it's actually a wedge
of cheese encased in amber.
So, who is this Gorgonzola?
Legend has it that
she was the evil
half sister of Parmesano
the greatest dairy farmer
in Mesopotamia.
After she got caught trying
to steal her brother's riches
she became an outcast,
shunned by society.
She went mad and vowed
that some day
she would get her revenge.
Must've have been
lactose intolerant.
Wow!
I haven't quite finished
translating the inscription
but there is supposedly a curse
on whoever removes
it from the tomb.
Some kind of,
transformation that occurs
when the moon
is in its third quarter.
But, but,
you're the one who removed it.
[chuckles]
Oh, come on, Stanley
all that stuff about curses
and-and transformations
is just silly superstition.
[grunting]
[chuckles]
Yeah, yeah, right,
I mean, you know.
What a bunch of hooey.
[instrumental music]
Oh!
My goodness,
I-I suddenly feel so..
...lightheaded.
You do? Uh, uh, here, here,
you-you sit down.
[sighs]
I-I guess it's just
been a long day
you know, traveling and all.
Maybe-maybe it's just jetlag.
Yeah, y-you wait here, okay.
I'm going to run
to the convenience store
down the street and I'm gonna
get you some water.
Oh, so sweet of you, Stanley.
[dramatic music]
[crackling]
[screams]
After 4000 years
Gorgonzola walks
the Earth once more.
And now, I shall take my revenge
upon the mortals who treated me
like so much spoiled milk.
Pretzels! Get yourself pretzels!
Oh, I shall have mine
with...cheese.
[laughing]
zap
[screaming]
[laughing]
Payback time, mortals!
Vengeance is mine.
Alright, you weirdo,
you're comin' Downtown.
Oh, I think not, copper.
Gorgonzola shall never
be locked up again.
[laughing]
[Ipkiss]
Okay, here you go, Jennifer
just call me Gunga Din.
Nice cold bottle of, uh..
J-Jen-Jennifer?
[instrumental music]
[laughs]
Let every mortal shudder
at the power of Gorgonzola.
I shall destroy your world.
[zapping]
[crackling]
[tires screeching]
We are live
at the Edge City Bridge
which has just been
turned to cheese
by the creature who calls
herself Gorgonzola.
What we're witnessin'
is the most powerful
destructive force
that Edge City has ever--
Hey!
I thought I was
the big cheese in town.
Now anymore, Gorgonzola is far
more powerful than you.
This cheese woman stinks,
me thinks.
Now, let me to my task
for nobody upstages
The Mask!
[intense music]
Ohh, careful, oh!
[The Mask]
'Must be a van, ouch!'
thud
This mold faced meddler
shall get a taste
of my extra sharp cheddar.
whoosh
[hissing]
Somebody poked me!
[laughs]
Now, that should
take care of.. Oh!
No, no, no, no,
you have to lie down, please
or else the therapy won't work.
[instrumental music]
So, how long have you
had this obsession
with turning stuff
into...cheese.
- You dare mock me?
- "You dare mock me?"
- Stop it!
- "Stop it!"
Annoying, aren't I?
But you know
what's really annoying?
[gibberish]
prrrt prrrt prrrt
[flatulating]
But wait, there's more.
swoosh
[screeching]
[screams]
The noise!
Big smile, now!
Say cheese!
Aaah!
Cheese wedgie!
Ah!
Nobody wedgies Gorgonzola.
[zapping]
[zapping]
[crackling]
[laughing]
Now that's a cheese wedgie.
[cracking]
[zipper opening]
Sorry, that's just
not my color.
You got anythin' in a nice
blue cheese.
None are impervious
to my powers.
It's im-impossible!
[zapping]
Your offendable rays
can't harm me.
For I am lactose intolerant man!
[instrumental music]
[zapping]
[crackling]
Crush that green faced fool!
[engine revving]
[horn honking]
[whirring]
The all new Mask
saw bearer.
It slices, it dices!
[music continues]
I really cut the cheese
that time, huh?
Didn't see that comin',
did ya?
I've had enough of you!
Oh, just when we were getting
to know each other so well.
Aaah!
[instrumental music]
[upbeat music]
[screams]
thud
Whoa, I thought
green hair was cool
but this dude's got
it all happenin'.
Yeah.
[Mask gibbering]
He is totally out there.
[upbeat music]
[grunts]
[groans]
Yeah, mosh pit!
Kickin'!
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
Now I ask you,
could I be anymore hip?
[screams]
These horrible sounds!
What's her problem?
[screams]
Oh, well, you know
she's more of that
new-age music scene.
You're gonna miss a great party!
Shake it, sister, shake it!
[snoring]
[alarm buzzing]
[Milo growling]
[yawning]
Wow! What a weird dream.
Well, the whole city
was being turned
into cheese
by a hideous monster.
[chuckles]
Oh, yeah,
that's pretty silly, huh?
[screams]
[woman on TV]
'And the city is in chaos'
'after Gorgonzola's
all night rampage'
turned half the Downtown area
into so much Muenster.
Wait a minute!
Gorgonzola and that amulet.
It looks just like the one--
[Mrs. Peenman]
'Ipkiss!'
[knocking on door]
'Ipkiss!'
What have you done to my niece?
- D-d-done?
- Hmm!
Well, I don't know why,
but Jennifer likes you.
Now, listen up!
I've set up a carriage drive
for the two of you
to Landfill Park this afternoon.
And then you're gonna
take her to the football game
at Edge Stadium tonight.
This way,
I'll know where you are.
Tonight, well, uh, gee, that,
that is really g-generous of you
but I-I-I..
I-I-I nothin'!
You don't keep
your end of the deal
then you can start packin'.
'Cause you'll be out
on the street tonight!
[Ipkiss chuckles]
[sighing]
Sounds like fun, Mrs. Peenman.
[crickets chirping]
[horse neighing]
Stanley, hi.
You know, I'm so sorry
for disappearing on you
like that last night.
Y-yeah.
Um, where did you go?
Well, to be honest,
I-I don't know.
You know, I can hardly remember
getting back to my aunt's
apartment.
Uh, Jen-Jennifer
I think there's something you
should know about the amulet.
Oh, oh, Stanley,
I forgot to tell you
I finished translating
the inscription.
[Jennifer]
Climb in,
I'll tell you all about it.
[horse neighing]
The inscription
says that in the light
of the third quarter moon
the bearer of the amulet
transforms into--
Some kind of nasty-looking
monster
with awesome destructive
dairy related powers?
How did you know that?
[chuckles]
Just a crazy hunch.
Y-y-you know, Jennifer,
you really
ought to return that thing
to its tomb.
Oh, Stanley,
don't be ridiculous.
[yawning]
Oh, my, the ride is making
me so, um, so drowsy.
Hmm.
I need to get that amulet
off her before..
[crackling]
What of the amulet?
You wouldn't be thinking of
returning it to my tomb,
in order to imprison me again
would you?
N-no, no, no, no,
of course not.
I-I mean, the-the-the thought
never crossed my--
Liar! Prepare to meet
your cheesy doom.
[galloping]
Oh!
[zapping]
[screams]
[panting]
I thought you might
come in handy.
[zapping]
Mmm, tickets to a stadium.
[chuckles]
A chance to curdle thousands
of mortals in one fell swoop.
[laughs]
Aah! How delightful.
[instrumental music]
[crickets chirping]
Wow, cool-lookin' mask.
Hey, kinda looks like you
on a bad night.
Hey! It's mine, give it back!
[laughs]
Oh!
[laughs]
What a dorky-lookin' statue.
Hey, maybe this will
improve his looks.
[thunder crashing]
Cheezin'!
Now, alright, you punks
I'm gonna have
to blow you away, see.
[fan whirring]
[screaming]
[blows air]
And away, we go!
[crowd cheering]
Man, these get-ups
get wilder every year.
[man on PA]
'It's third in 15, sports fans.'
'And all teams gonna need
a big pass play.'
'Ayer takes the snappin'..'
'My, oh, my, it's the old
Statue of Liberty play.'
Wait, just one doggone minute.
Somethin' cheesy
is goin' on here.
You bet it is.
Attention, attention, mortals!
The last thing you smell
will be the sweet
stench of my revenge.
[zapping]
[crackling]
[zapping]
[laughs]
Alright, Gorgonzola,
come out with your hands up!
It's the SWAT team!
[instrumental music]
whip
thud
[man on PA]
'The Mask snaps the ball
back to..'
'...The Mask!'
'He hurls the ball
into the end zone to..'
'...The Mask.'
'He's got her, he doesn't'
'he does, he doesn't.'
'My, oh, my, that was unmanly!'
[crowd cheering]
Perhaps, you have an appetite
for some of my string cheese.
[screams]
Maybe later,
I'm a little uptight right now.
[grunts]
Oh! Ow-ow! Whoa! Whoa!
[whirring]
Round up time.
And I'm a gonna rope
me a cheese doggy.
Yee-haw!
thud
Hope you had a pleasant flight.
Bye-bye, bye-bye!
[machine whirring]
[screams]
[birds chirping]
I know I've been a rotten kid,
Miss Cheese Lady
but please, please, please
don't zap me
'with that cheesy
stare of yours again.'
[instrumental music]
On account of,
I'm so weak from our battle
it would turn me into cheese
this time for sure.
Oh, really.
[slurping]
[zapping]
Back at you..
No!
[instrumental music]
This little piggy needs
to go all the way home.
[whirring]
[screams]
[instrumental music]
[buzzing]
Whoa, oh.
Now, I get to play hero
with Stanley's girl.
Ipkiss, I told you to get
my niece home early.
Wait till I get
my hands on you!
On the other hand..
...why not let Stanley get
the credit for saving the girl.
[thunder crashing]
Jennifer! It's you!
[chuckles]
Well, of course it's me,
Stanley.
Who-who were you expecting?
Well, uh, nobody.
How in the world
did we get here?
It's a re-e-ally long story.
Well, do you think maybe you
could tell me over breakfast?
I suddenly got a craving
for a thick drippy
triple cheese omelet.
[gulps]
[theme music]