The Mask (1995–1997): Season 2, Episode 22 - Broadway Malady - full transcript
♪
♪ I GOTCHA
WITH MY WINNING SMILE ♪
♪ I'M A LIVING LESSON
IN FLAIR AND STYLE ♪
♪ JUST CAN'T HELP BUT STARE
AT MY SAVIOR-FAIRE ♪
♪ I'M NOUVEAU, DECO,
ROMAN-GRECO, ROCOCO, BARROCO ♪
♪ BE-BOP, HIP-HOP, FLIP-FLOP
SOMEBODY STOP ME ♪
♪ PRETTY VIRIDIAN FACES
LIKE MINE ♪
♪ DON'T COME A DIME A DOZEN,
I STAND OUT OF THE CROWD ♪
♪ BABE, WHEN THEY MADE ME,
YEAH, THEY BROKE THE MOLD ♪
♪ WHOLESOME AND KIND,
STAID AND REFINED ♪
♪ TOTALLY OUT OF MIND ♪
♪ ARCH-BILLIANS
AND NE-ER-DO-WELLS ♪
♪ HAD BETTER LEARN
TO DECORATE PRISON CELLS ♪
♪ GREEN GOES WITH ANYTHING
IF THEY ASK, SEE ♪
♪ WELL THERE'S ONE LAST THING
I GOTTA SING ABOUT ♪
♪ OPEN UP WIDE
AND REALLY SHOUT ♪
♪ OHHH, LOOK OUT ♪
♪ THIS IS "THE MASK"♪
♪ S-S-S-S-MOKIN' ♪♪
♪
I HEAR YOUR MONKEY TALKS.
THE MONKEY DOES NOT TALK.
WELL!
I LOVE THIS PART!
BETTER GET YOUR FILL.
TONIGHT'S THE VERY END.
OF THE MARATHON?
OF THE MOVIES!
THEY AIN'T MAKING 'EM NO MORE,
NOW THAT SIR ANDREW BEDWETTER'S
DOING A MAD MONKEY MUSICAL.
THEY'RE MAKING MAD MONKEY
INTO A MUSICAL?
AHHH!
ALL RIGHT,
ONCE MORE FROM THE TOP,
AND THIS TIME,
TRY NOT TO BLOCK THE MONKEY!
I HEAR YOUR MONKEY TALKS.
THE MONKEY DOES NOT TALK.
WHY, HE SINGS!
♪ I WAS A MAD, MAD MONKEY ♪
♪ WHO USED TO SWING
FROM TREE TO TREE ♪
♪ BUT NOW I SING
IN BROADWAY MUSICALS ♪
♪ AND LIGHT UP THE MARQUE ♪
♪ THEY USED TO CALL ME BAD GUY ♪
♪ I'D MAKE THEM
WRITHE IN AGONY ♪
♪ BUT THEN I LEARNED
TO SING AND DANCE ♪
♪ NOW I'M ONE HAPPY CHIMPANZEE ♪
STOP THE MADNESS!
NOW LETS US GET ONE THING
STRAIGHT, HOMBRE.
MAD MONKEY DON'T SING.
MAD MONKEY DON'T DANCE.
MAD MONKEY DO THIS!
♪
ANY QUESTIONS?
GEORGE, IRA!
EJECT THIS VIRIDIAN VANDAL
AT ONCE!
♪
HUH?
IF YOU'RE VERY GOOD,
I'LL SHOW YOU HOW
TO DO THAT SOMETIME.
SIR, YOU HAVE INSULTED
MY MAD MONKEY!
SHALL WE SAY PISTOLS AT DAWN?
HMMM, THEN HOW 'BOUT
WEDGIES AT NOON?
IT LOOKS LIKE HE GOT AWAY,
MR. BEDWETTER.
DON'T JUST STAND THERE,
CLEAN UP THIS MESS!
♪
AND GET ME A BIGGER MONKEY!
♪
LOOK AT THESE REPAIR BILLS!
MEXICAN BAR SETS,
LIGHTS OF BROADWAY SETS,
FLASHING MARQUEES,
AND THAT'S JUST THE BEGINNING.
SIR ANDREW BEDWETTER
HAS DEFAULTED ON HIS LOAN.
THAT MEANS THIS BANK
IS NOW THE LEGAL OWNER
OF MAD MONKEY,
THE MUSICAL.
AND THAT'S WHERE YOU COME IN.
ME?
ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS BRING
THE BUDGET UNDER CONTROL.
I'M SURE MR. BEDWETTER'S
A REASONABLE MAN.
♪
SO, UM, IF IF IF WE COULD
CUT THE SHOW
DOWN TO, UH, EIGHT ACTORS,
TWELVE BACKDROPS, UM,
TWENTY-FIVE PROPS,
AND TWENTY-EIGHT COSTUMES,
UM...
WELL THAT SOUNDS REASONABLE,
MR. IPKISS.
IT DOES,
OH, OH, WELL.
OF COURSE, YOU KNOW THAT MEANS
GETTING RID
OF THE EXTRA LARGE MONKEY SUIT,
THE GIANT SKATING GRIZZLY BEAR,
OH, AND THE ARMORED
TANK BRIGADE.
BUT FRANKLY,
I THINK THAT'S DOABLE.
WHY YOU LITTLE...
WHY, YOU JUST GAVE ME A
MARVELOUS IDEA!
I...I DID?
WHY IF WE CAN DOUBLE UP ON JOBS,
WE CAN SAVE MORE MONEY!
OH, YOU'D BE PERFECT FOR THE
ROMANTIC LEAD!
REALLY?
YES, HERE'S A SCRIPT,
WHY DON'T YOU USE MY OFFICE
AND READ IT OVER, EH?
WELL, OKAY,
SURE!
♪
UH, THIS IS BOB,
THE WORLD'S TALLEST MAN.
NO,
GET ME A BIGGER TALLEST MAN!
♪
YEAH, CHARLIE, SIR ANDREW SAYS
I DEFINITELY HAVE WHAT IT TAKES.
OF COURSE, THEY FOUND SOMEONE
ELSE FOR THE LEAD, YOU KNOW.
STANLEY, I'VE BEEN GOING
OVER SOME OF THESE NEW BILLS.
DANCING MERMAIDS, A FULL-SCALE
REPLICA OF THE SPACE SHUTTLE,
AND WORST OF ALL,
A FIFTEEN-FOOT,
FULLY OPERATIONAL DANCING,
SINGING, REMOTE CONTROLLED,
ANIMATRONIC MONKEY!
SOUNDS EXPENSIVE.
THE SHOW OPENS TOMORROW.
IF IT FLOPS, YOU'RE FIRED!
I COULD BE FIRED...TOMORROW?
YOU'RE RIGHT, YOU'RE RIGHT,
WHAT WAS I THINKING?
YOU'RE FIRED NOW!
IF THE SHOW DOESN'T FLOP, WE'LL
REHIRE YOU!
HOW'S THAT?
GREAT.
♪
I'M HERE AT THE MOST ANTICIPATED
THEATRICAL DEBUT OF THE YEAR,
MAD MONKEY, THE MUSICAL.
OH, I'LL JUST...
OKAY...
OH MILO, MILO, THE TICKETS,
GET THE TICKETS.
♪
WE INTERRUPT THIS BROADCAST TO
BRING YOU A SPECIAL REPORT.
I'M HERE AT FIRST FEDERAL BANK,
WHERE A TENSE STANDOFF IS
UNDERWAY.
FOR WEEKS, A PAIR OF NOTORIOUS
BANK ROBBERS
HAVE BEEN ELUDING AUTHORITIES,
BLOWING UP JUST ABOUT EVERY BANK
IN TOWN.
NOW THE POLICE HAVE THEM
CORNERED INSIDE FIRST FEDERAL.
WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT IS
UNCERTAIN.
BUT ONE THING IS SURE...
♪
I KNOW IT'S NOT MY BANK, MILO.
BUT SOMEBODY'S GOTTA DO
SOMETHING.
♪
NOW TO TAKE A BITE OUTTA CRIME!
BUT FIRST...
I GOTTA SEE A MAN
ABOUT A MAD MONKEY!
♪ I WAS, IT'S TRUE,
A MAD MONKEY ♪
♪ I USED TO THRASH
AROUND DEMENTEDLY ♪
♪ BUT NOW I SING
MOST EVERY PLACE ♪
♪ FROM RAGING BATTLEFIELDS ♪
♪ TO OUTER SPACE ♪
♪ HE WAS, IT'S TRUE,
A MAD MONKEY ♪
♪ HE USED TO THRASH
AROUND DEMENTEDLY ♪
HEY, LOOK!
♪ BUT NOW HE
SINGS MOST EVERY PLACE ♪
IT WOULD'VE BEEN
A REALLY BIG CHANDELIER,
BUT WE DIDN'T HAVE
IT IN THE BUDGET.
♪
OHHH!
♪
MAKE PEACE, NOT WAR.
MAKE PEACE, NOT WAR.
MAKE PEAS, NOT WARTS.
♪
ISN'T THIS GREAT, CHARLIE?
CHARLIE?
GET THAT MASK!
♪ LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA
LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA ♪
♪ LA, LA, LA, LA, LA
LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA ♪
YOU CALL THAT A CAN-CAN?
NOW THAT'S A CAN-CAN.
♪ I LIKE TO DANCE
AND I LIKE TO SING ♪
♪ BASHING AND SMASHING
USED TO BE MY THING ♪
♪ SONG AND DANCE
IS RARE AND REFINED ♪
♪ BASHING
AND SMASHING'S DIVINE ♪
UGH, IRONICALLY, THIS IS MUCH
MORE LIKE THE MAD MONKEY
I KNOW AND LOVE.
♪ EACH ONE JUST BY ITSELF ♪
♪ IS TRULY FINE ♪
♪ BUT THEY'RE
MORE FUN COMBINED ♪
BANANA?
♪
HEY,
DON'T KNOCK THE CLASSICS!
♪
UM, IT TIMES LIKE THESE I WISH
WE HAD A SMALLER MONKEY.
♪
SO, DID YOU START THE PARTY
WITHOUT ME?
WELL, THAT'LL TEACH MOI
TO ARRIVE FASHIONABLY LATE.
CONVENIENTLY LATE MORE LIKE IT.
THE ROBBERS GOT AWAY
AND NOW YOU'RE HERE.
AS LONG AS I'M HERE,
MIGHT AS WELL DO SOME GOOD.
THIS LOOKS LIKE A JOB FOR...
SUPER WEDGIE!
WHOA,
LOOK OUT!
♪
-OH!
-UGH!
♪
ALL RIGHT,
I'LL COME BY.
I'M COMING.
STANLEY,
OPEN UP, IT'S PEGGY!
♪
OH!
MASK MAKES MONKEY
OUT OF MUSICAL!
EXCLUSIVE BY PEGGY BRANT,
THANK YOU VERY MUCH!
BROUGHT THAT LAME 'OL STORY
ABOUT FIRST FEDERAL BLOWING UP
STRAIGHT TO PAGE TWO.
THE MASK DIDN'T SAVE
FIRST FEDERAL
AND HE RUINED MAD MONKEY?
YEP,
GOOD NEWS DAY!
GOOD NEWS?
MAD MONKEY'S GONNA CLOSE,
TAKING MY JOB WITH IT!
OH, I HATE THIS MASK!
♪
YOU SURE YOU WANNA LOCK THIS
THING UP, STAN?
LOOKS KINDA COOL.
LOCK IT UP, TOBY.
I NEVER WANNA SEE IT AGAIN!
♪
GOOD NEWS, STAN,
MAD MONKEY'S A MONSTER HIT!
BOX OFFICE RECEIPTS ARE GOING
THROUGH THE ROOF,
AND IT'S ALL BECAUSE OF THE
MASK!
YOU KNOW, I'VE GOTTA HAND IT TO
YOU GUYS.
PUTTING HIM IN THE SHOW WAS A
STROKE OF GENIUS!
IF THIS KEEPS UP, I MIGHT EVEN
GIVE YOU YOUR OLD JOB BACK.
♪
THEY LOVED THE SHOW, BOSS,
AND THEY LOVED THE BIG MONKEY.
OH, YES, YES, GET ME
AN EVEN BIGGER MONKEY, EH!
WELL, WHAT ABOUT THE BUDGET?
BUDGET, OH,
I'LL HANG THE BUDGET!
OR BETTER YET,
HANG THAT FOOL, IPKISS!
BUT WHAT THEY REALLY LOVED WAS
THE MASK!
OH, YES, THE MASK!
HOW DO WE LURE BACK THE MASK?
WE NEED A VILLAIN,
OH, YES!
A SUPER VILLAIN, PREFERABLY ONE
WITH A RICH BARITONE.
HOW DO WE GET THAT?
♪
OK, LOOK, WE'RE ONLY AUDITIONING
THE SINGING SUPER VILLAINS.
WILL THE DANCING SUPER VILLAINS
PLEASE WAIT OUTSIDE?
♪
ONCE WE GET A VILLAIN,
HOW WE GONNA DRAW THE MASK
TO THE THEATER, BOSS?
I DON'T KNOW, BY DOING WHATEVER
SUPER VILLAINS DO...
WREAK HAVOC, TERRORIZE PEOPLE,
DESTROY A SECTION OF THE CITY.
YES, THAT'S IT.
GET ME A MAP OF THE CITY.
WE'LL PICK A NICE SECTION
TO DESTROY.
BUT ONE WITH NOT TOO MANY
THEATERGOERS, RIGHT?
AHHH!
MAN, ARE WE GONNA NEED MORE
MONEY IN THE BUDGET.
HE'S GONE TOTALLY INSANE!
I GOTTA GET THE MASK BACK!
OKAY, HERE'S THE THING.
NONE OF YOU CAN DANCE,
NONE OF YOU CAN SING.
NONE OF YOU REALLY SAY...
MAD MONKEY!
♪
YES, YES!
NOW THAT SAYS MAD MONKEY!
HA HA HA HA HA!
♪
COME ON!
♪
HA HA HA HA HA,
OH GOODIE!
IT'S IPKISS,
THE MASK CAN WAIT!
IPKISS!
STEP ON MY PRODUCTION BUDGET
WILL YOU?
NOW I'LL STEP ON YOU!
♪
YOU CRUNCHED MY NUMBERS, IPKISS!
NOW I'M GONNA CRUNCH YOURS!
AH!
♪
I GOTTA GET THE MASK,
AHHH!
♪
LOOK, LOOK, TOBY, I KNOW I DON'T
HAVE THE KEY...
BUT YOU GOTTA LET ME INTO THAT
SAFETY DEPOSIT BOX, YOU GOTTA!
AH, NOW IS NOT A GOOD TIME,
STANLEY.
GO AWAY.
ALL RIGHT, ENOUGH TALK.
EMPTY OUT THE BOXES.
WE GOTTA DO WHAT THEY SAY, STAN.
THEY SET THE WHOLE PLACE TO
BLOW!
♪
OH, SURE, A FELLOW BANK EMPLOYEE
YOU CAN'T HELP,
BUT ANY SCHMOE WITH A HOSTAGE
AND HIGH-POWERED EXPLOSIVES
AND IT'S YES, SIR, WHAT CAN I DO
FOR YOU, SIR?
WOULD YOU LIKE
FREE CHECKING, SIR?
HUH?
♪
AHHH!
♪
THERE YOU ARE!
♪
PUT THE BANK DOWN!
♪
AHHH, MY AUDIENCE HAS ARRIVED.
FINALLY, THE BIG TIME!
♪ I'M JUST AN ANGRY MONKEY,
TEARING UP THE CHI-CHI ♪
♪ PUTTING ON A SHOW ♪
♪ DA DA DA DA DA DA DA ♪
UGH,
AH!
♪
♪ I'M GONNA BE A BIG STAR ♪
♪ WATCH ME TOTAL THIS CAR ♪
♪ WITH MY TIPPY TOE ♪
AHHH!
SING WITH ME, BOYS!
♪
SING!
I'LL SING WITH YOU!
♪ SURRENDER
YOU PRETENTIOUS WITCH ♪
♪ I THINK
YOU'RE REALLY LOSING IT ♪
♪ YOUR MONKEY IS WHIPPY SNOOT ♪
♪ AND YET HE'S GOT
A MEAN LEFT HOOK ♪
♪ HURRY UP, BIG APE,
WHY DON'T YOU COME OVER HERE ♪
♪ BEND RIGHT DOWN
AND I WILL WHISPER IN YOUR EAR ♪
♪ BOY, YOU SURE HAVE
A NICE SMILE ♪
♪ WHILE YOU'RE HERE I THINK ♪
♪ I'LL TIE YOU WITH A CHAIN ♪
♪
AHHH!
♪ WELL, GUESS THERE'S ALWAYS
PLAN B ♪
♪ USE THE UKULELE
FOR THE SAVAGE BRAIN ♪
♪
-UGH!
-YEOH!
-EWW!
-UHH!
♪ NOW LOOK AT ME STRAIGHT
IN MY EYES ♪
♪ AND PICK UP SOMEONE
YOUR OWN SIZE ♪
♪ YOU'RE COWARDLY,
THAT IS MY HUNCH ♪
♪ THAT MONKEY SURE
CAN PACK A PUNCH ♪
♪
AHHH!
♪
♪ THIS IS GREAT,
I BET I GET A MOVIE DEAL ♪
♪ GUESS WHAT GUYS, THIS APE'S
GOT AN ACHILLES' HEEL ♪
♪
NOW THAT'S ENTERTAINMENT!
♪
I'M SURE THEY WENT THIS WAY.
HUH?
GEORGE AND IRA?
WE ONLY ROBBED THE BANKS
FOR YOU, MR. BEDWETTER.
YEAH, WE HAD TO COVER ALL THEM
EXTRA THINGS, YOU KNOW.
WELL FROM NOW ON,
THE ONLY HOUSE
YOU'LL BE PLAYING
IS THE BIG HOUSE.
WELL, STAN, YOU DID GOOD.
YOU CAN HAVE YOUR OLD JOB BACK.
GREAT!
YOU CAN START BY CLEANING UP
THIS MESS.
GREAT.
♪
ALL RIGHT,
ONCE MORE FROM THE TOP!
♪ WE ARE INSANE,
AS YOU CAN SEE ♪
♪ WE'RE GOING TO MASTERMIND
A BIG CRIME SPREE ♪
♪ WE'LL RULE THE WORLD,
WE WILL NOT FAIL ♪
♪ IF ONLY WE COULD BREAK ♪
♪ OUT OF THIS JAIL ♪
WELL, WHAT DO YA KNOW?
A GIANT CHANDELIER.
HMMM, I GUESS WE FOUND ROOM IN
THE BUDGET AFTER ALL.
HA HA HA!
♪
♪ I GOTCHA
WITH MY WINNING SMILE ♪
♪ I'M A LIVING LESSON
IN FLAIR AND STYLE ♪
♪ JUST CAN'T HELP BUT STARE
AT MY SAVIOR-FAIRE ♪
♪ I'M NOUVEAU, DECO,
ROMAN-GRECO, ROCOCO, BARROCO ♪
♪ BE-BOP, HIP-HOP, FLIP-FLOP
SOMEBODY STOP ME ♪
♪ PRETTY VIRIDIAN FACES
LIKE MINE ♪
♪ DON'T COME A DIME A DOZEN,
I STAND OUT OF THE CROWD ♪
♪ BABE, WHEN THEY MADE ME,
YEAH, THEY BROKE THE MOLD ♪
♪ WHOLESOME AND KIND,
STAID AND REFINED ♪
♪ TOTALLY OUT OF MIND ♪
♪ ARCH-BILLIANS
AND NE-ER-DO-WELLS ♪
♪ HAD BETTER LEARN
TO DECORATE PRISON CELLS ♪
♪ GREEN GOES WITH ANYTHING
IF THEY ASK, SEE ♪
♪ WELL THERE'S ONE LAST THING
I GOTTA SING ABOUT ♪
♪ OPEN UP WIDE
AND REALLY SHOUT ♪
♪ OHHH, LOOK OUT ♪
♪ THIS IS "THE MASK"♪
♪ S-S-S-S-MOKIN' ♪♪
♪
I HEAR YOUR MONKEY TALKS.
THE MONKEY DOES NOT TALK.
WELL!
I LOVE THIS PART!
BETTER GET YOUR FILL.
TONIGHT'S THE VERY END.
OF THE MARATHON?
OF THE MOVIES!
THEY AIN'T MAKING 'EM NO MORE,
NOW THAT SIR ANDREW BEDWETTER'S
DOING A MAD MONKEY MUSICAL.
THEY'RE MAKING MAD MONKEY
INTO A MUSICAL?
AHHH!
ALL RIGHT,
ONCE MORE FROM THE TOP,
AND THIS TIME,
TRY NOT TO BLOCK THE MONKEY!
I HEAR YOUR MONKEY TALKS.
THE MONKEY DOES NOT TALK.
WHY, HE SINGS!
♪ I WAS A MAD, MAD MONKEY ♪
♪ WHO USED TO SWING
FROM TREE TO TREE ♪
♪ BUT NOW I SING
IN BROADWAY MUSICALS ♪
♪ AND LIGHT UP THE MARQUE ♪
♪ THEY USED TO CALL ME BAD GUY ♪
♪ I'D MAKE THEM
WRITHE IN AGONY ♪
♪ BUT THEN I LEARNED
TO SING AND DANCE ♪
♪ NOW I'M ONE HAPPY CHIMPANZEE ♪
STOP THE MADNESS!
NOW LETS US GET ONE THING
STRAIGHT, HOMBRE.
MAD MONKEY DON'T SING.
MAD MONKEY DON'T DANCE.
MAD MONKEY DO THIS!
♪
ANY QUESTIONS?
GEORGE, IRA!
EJECT THIS VIRIDIAN VANDAL
AT ONCE!
♪
HUH?
IF YOU'RE VERY GOOD,
I'LL SHOW YOU HOW
TO DO THAT SOMETIME.
SIR, YOU HAVE INSULTED
MY MAD MONKEY!
SHALL WE SAY PISTOLS AT DAWN?
HMMM, THEN HOW 'BOUT
WEDGIES AT NOON?
IT LOOKS LIKE HE GOT AWAY,
MR. BEDWETTER.
DON'T JUST STAND THERE,
CLEAN UP THIS MESS!
♪
AND GET ME A BIGGER MONKEY!
♪
LOOK AT THESE REPAIR BILLS!
MEXICAN BAR SETS,
LIGHTS OF BROADWAY SETS,
FLASHING MARQUEES,
AND THAT'S JUST THE BEGINNING.
SIR ANDREW BEDWETTER
HAS DEFAULTED ON HIS LOAN.
THAT MEANS THIS BANK
IS NOW THE LEGAL OWNER
OF MAD MONKEY,
THE MUSICAL.
AND THAT'S WHERE YOU COME IN.
ME?
ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS BRING
THE BUDGET UNDER CONTROL.
I'M SURE MR. BEDWETTER'S
A REASONABLE MAN.
♪
SO, UM, IF IF IF WE COULD
CUT THE SHOW
DOWN TO, UH, EIGHT ACTORS,
TWELVE BACKDROPS, UM,
TWENTY-FIVE PROPS,
AND TWENTY-EIGHT COSTUMES,
UM...
WELL THAT SOUNDS REASONABLE,
MR. IPKISS.
IT DOES,
OH, OH, WELL.
OF COURSE, YOU KNOW THAT MEANS
GETTING RID
OF THE EXTRA LARGE MONKEY SUIT,
THE GIANT SKATING GRIZZLY BEAR,
OH, AND THE ARMORED
TANK BRIGADE.
BUT FRANKLY,
I THINK THAT'S DOABLE.
WHY YOU LITTLE...
WHY, YOU JUST GAVE ME A
MARVELOUS IDEA!
I...I DID?
WHY IF WE CAN DOUBLE UP ON JOBS,
WE CAN SAVE MORE MONEY!
OH, YOU'D BE PERFECT FOR THE
ROMANTIC LEAD!
REALLY?
YES, HERE'S A SCRIPT,
WHY DON'T YOU USE MY OFFICE
AND READ IT OVER, EH?
WELL, OKAY,
SURE!
♪
UH, THIS IS BOB,
THE WORLD'S TALLEST MAN.
NO,
GET ME A BIGGER TALLEST MAN!
♪
YEAH, CHARLIE, SIR ANDREW SAYS
I DEFINITELY HAVE WHAT IT TAKES.
OF COURSE, THEY FOUND SOMEONE
ELSE FOR THE LEAD, YOU KNOW.
STANLEY, I'VE BEEN GOING
OVER SOME OF THESE NEW BILLS.
DANCING MERMAIDS, A FULL-SCALE
REPLICA OF THE SPACE SHUTTLE,
AND WORST OF ALL,
A FIFTEEN-FOOT,
FULLY OPERATIONAL DANCING,
SINGING, REMOTE CONTROLLED,
ANIMATRONIC MONKEY!
SOUNDS EXPENSIVE.
THE SHOW OPENS TOMORROW.
IF IT FLOPS, YOU'RE FIRED!
I COULD BE FIRED...TOMORROW?
YOU'RE RIGHT, YOU'RE RIGHT,
WHAT WAS I THINKING?
YOU'RE FIRED NOW!
IF THE SHOW DOESN'T FLOP, WE'LL
REHIRE YOU!
HOW'S THAT?
GREAT.
♪
I'M HERE AT THE MOST ANTICIPATED
THEATRICAL DEBUT OF THE YEAR,
MAD MONKEY, THE MUSICAL.
OH, I'LL JUST...
OKAY...
OH MILO, MILO, THE TICKETS,
GET THE TICKETS.
♪
WE INTERRUPT THIS BROADCAST TO
BRING YOU A SPECIAL REPORT.
I'M HERE AT FIRST FEDERAL BANK,
WHERE A TENSE STANDOFF IS
UNDERWAY.
FOR WEEKS, A PAIR OF NOTORIOUS
BANK ROBBERS
HAVE BEEN ELUDING AUTHORITIES,
BLOWING UP JUST ABOUT EVERY BANK
IN TOWN.
NOW THE POLICE HAVE THEM
CORNERED INSIDE FIRST FEDERAL.
WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT IS
UNCERTAIN.
BUT ONE THING IS SURE...
♪
I KNOW IT'S NOT MY BANK, MILO.
BUT SOMEBODY'S GOTTA DO
SOMETHING.
♪
NOW TO TAKE A BITE OUTTA CRIME!
BUT FIRST...
I GOTTA SEE A MAN
ABOUT A MAD MONKEY!
♪ I WAS, IT'S TRUE,
A MAD MONKEY ♪
♪ I USED TO THRASH
AROUND DEMENTEDLY ♪
♪ BUT NOW I SING
MOST EVERY PLACE ♪
♪ FROM RAGING BATTLEFIELDS ♪
♪ TO OUTER SPACE ♪
♪ HE WAS, IT'S TRUE,
A MAD MONKEY ♪
♪ HE USED TO THRASH
AROUND DEMENTEDLY ♪
HEY, LOOK!
♪ BUT NOW HE
SINGS MOST EVERY PLACE ♪
IT WOULD'VE BEEN
A REALLY BIG CHANDELIER,
BUT WE DIDN'T HAVE
IT IN THE BUDGET.
♪
OHHH!
♪
MAKE PEACE, NOT WAR.
MAKE PEACE, NOT WAR.
MAKE PEAS, NOT WARTS.
♪
ISN'T THIS GREAT, CHARLIE?
CHARLIE?
GET THAT MASK!
♪ LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA
LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA ♪
♪ LA, LA, LA, LA, LA
LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA ♪
YOU CALL THAT A CAN-CAN?
NOW THAT'S A CAN-CAN.
♪ I LIKE TO DANCE
AND I LIKE TO SING ♪
♪ BASHING AND SMASHING
USED TO BE MY THING ♪
♪ SONG AND DANCE
IS RARE AND REFINED ♪
♪ BASHING
AND SMASHING'S DIVINE ♪
UGH, IRONICALLY, THIS IS MUCH
MORE LIKE THE MAD MONKEY
I KNOW AND LOVE.
♪ EACH ONE JUST BY ITSELF ♪
♪ IS TRULY FINE ♪
♪ BUT THEY'RE
MORE FUN COMBINED ♪
BANANA?
♪
HEY,
DON'T KNOCK THE CLASSICS!
♪
UM, IT TIMES LIKE THESE I WISH
WE HAD A SMALLER MONKEY.
♪
SO, DID YOU START THE PARTY
WITHOUT ME?
WELL, THAT'LL TEACH MOI
TO ARRIVE FASHIONABLY LATE.
CONVENIENTLY LATE MORE LIKE IT.
THE ROBBERS GOT AWAY
AND NOW YOU'RE HERE.
AS LONG AS I'M HERE,
MIGHT AS WELL DO SOME GOOD.
THIS LOOKS LIKE A JOB FOR...
SUPER WEDGIE!
WHOA,
LOOK OUT!
♪
-OH!
-UGH!
♪
ALL RIGHT,
I'LL COME BY.
I'M COMING.
STANLEY,
OPEN UP, IT'S PEGGY!
♪
OH!
MASK MAKES MONKEY
OUT OF MUSICAL!
EXCLUSIVE BY PEGGY BRANT,
THANK YOU VERY MUCH!
BROUGHT THAT LAME 'OL STORY
ABOUT FIRST FEDERAL BLOWING UP
STRAIGHT TO PAGE TWO.
THE MASK DIDN'T SAVE
FIRST FEDERAL
AND HE RUINED MAD MONKEY?
YEP,
GOOD NEWS DAY!
GOOD NEWS?
MAD MONKEY'S GONNA CLOSE,
TAKING MY JOB WITH IT!
OH, I HATE THIS MASK!
♪
YOU SURE YOU WANNA LOCK THIS
THING UP, STAN?
LOOKS KINDA COOL.
LOCK IT UP, TOBY.
I NEVER WANNA SEE IT AGAIN!
♪
GOOD NEWS, STAN,
MAD MONKEY'S A MONSTER HIT!
BOX OFFICE RECEIPTS ARE GOING
THROUGH THE ROOF,
AND IT'S ALL BECAUSE OF THE
MASK!
YOU KNOW, I'VE GOTTA HAND IT TO
YOU GUYS.
PUTTING HIM IN THE SHOW WAS A
STROKE OF GENIUS!
IF THIS KEEPS UP, I MIGHT EVEN
GIVE YOU YOUR OLD JOB BACK.
♪
THEY LOVED THE SHOW, BOSS,
AND THEY LOVED THE BIG MONKEY.
OH, YES, YES, GET ME
AN EVEN BIGGER MONKEY, EH!
WELL, WHAT ABOUT THE BUDGET?
BUDGET, OH,
I'LL HANG THE BUDGET!
OR BETTER YET,
HANG THAT FOOL, IPKISS!
BUT WHAT THEY REALLY LOVED WAS
THE MASK!
OH, YES, THE MASK!
HOW DO WE LURE BACK THE MASK?
WE NEED A VILLAIN,
OH, YES!
A SUPER VILLAIN, PREFERABLY ONE
WITH A RICH BARITONE.
HOW DO WE GET THAT?
♪
OK, LOOK, WE'RE ONLY AUDITIONING
THE SINGING SUPER VILLAINS.
WILL THE DANCING SUPER VILLAINS
PLEASE WAIT OUTSIDE?
♪
ONCE WE GET A VILLAIN,
HOW WE GONNA DRAW THE MASK
TO THE THEATER, BOSS?
I DON'T KNOW, BY DOING WHATEVER
SUPER VILLAINS DO...
WREAK HAVOC, TERRORIZE PEOPLE,
DESTROY A SECTION OF THE CITY.
YES, THAT'S IT.
GET ME A MAP OF THE CITY.
WE'LL PICK A NICE SECTION
TO DESTROY.
BUT ONE WITH NOT TOO MANY
THEATERGOERS, RIGHT?
AHHH!
MAN, ARE WE GONNA NEED MORE
MONEY IN THE BUDGET.
HE'S GONE TOTALLY INSANE!
I GOTTA GET THE MASK BACK!
OKAY, HERE'S THE THING.
NONE OF YOU CAN DANCE,
NONE OF YOU CAN SING.
NONE OF YOU REALLY SAY...
MAD MONKEY!
♪
YES, YES!
NOW THAT SAYS MAD MONKEY!
HA HA HA HA HA!
♪
COME ON!
♪
HA HA HA HA HA,
OH GOODIE!
IT'S IPKISS,
THE MASK CAN WAIT!
IPKISS!
STEP ON MY PRODUCTION BUDGET
WILL YOU?
NOW I'LL STEP ON YOU!
♪
YOU CRUNCHED MY NUMBERS, IPKISS!
NOW I'M GONNA CRUNCH YOURS!
AH!
♪
I GOTTA GET THE MASK,
AHHH!
♪
LOOK, LOOK, TOBY, I KNOW I DON'T
HAVE THE KEY...
BUT YOU GOTTA LET ME INTO THAT
SAFETY DEPOSIT BOX, YOU GOTTA!
AH, NOW IS NOT A GOOD TIME,
STANLEY.
GO AWAY.
ALL RIGHT, ENOUGH TALK.
EMPTY OUT THE BOXES.
WE GOTTA DO WHAT THEY SAY, STAN.
THEY SET THE WHOLE PLACE TO
BLOW!
♪
OH, SURE, A FELLOW BANK EMPLOYEE
YOU CAN'T HELP,
BUT ANY SCHMOE WITH A HOSTAGE
AND HIGH-POWERED EXPLOSIVES
AND IT'S YES, SIR, WHAT CAN I DO
FOR YOU, SIR?
WOULD YOU LIKE
FREE CHECKING, SIR?
HUH?
♪
AHHH!
♪
THERE YOU ARE!
♪
PUT THE BANK DOWN!
♪
AHHH, MY AUDIENCE HAS ARRIVED.
FINALLY, THE BIG TIME!
♪ I'M JUST AN ANGRY MONKEY,
TEARING UP THE CHI-CHI ♪
♪ PUTTING ON A SHOW ♪
♪ DA DA DA DA DA DA DA ♪
UGH,
AH!
♪
♪ I'M GONNA BE A BIG STAR ♪
♪ WATCH ME TOTAL THIS CAR ♪
♪ WITH MY TIPPY TOE ♪
AHHH!
SING WITH ME, BOYS!
♪
SING!
I'LL SING WITH YOU!
♪ SURRENDER
YOU PRETENTIOUS WITCH ♪
♪ I THINK
YOU'RE REALLY LOSING IT ♪
♪ YOUR MONKEY IS WHIPPY SNOOT ♪
♪ AND YET HE'S GOT
A MEAN LEFT HOOK ♪
♪ HURRY UP, BIG APE,
WHY DON'T YOU COME OVER HERE ♪
♪ BEND RIGHT DOWN
AND I WILL WHISPER IN YOUR EAR ♪
♪ BOY, YOU SURE HAVE
A NICE SMILE ♪
♪ WHILE YOU'RE HERE I THINK ♪
♪ I'LL TIE YOU WITH A CHAIN ♪
♪
AHHH!
♪ WELL, GUESS THERE'S ALWAYS
PLAN B ♪
♪ USE THE UKULELE
FOR THE SAVAGE BRAIN ♪
♪
-UGH!
-YEOH!
-EWW!
-UHH!
♪ NOW LOOK AT ME STRAIGHT
IN MY EYES ♪
♪ AND PICK UP SOMEONE
YOUR OWN SIZE ♪
♪ YOU'RE COWARDLY,
THAT IS MY HUNCH ♪
♪ THAT MONKEY SURE
CAN PACK A PUNCH ♪
♪
AHHH!
♪
♪ THIS IS GREAT,
I BET I GET A MOVIE DEAL ♪
♪ GUESS WHAT GUYS, THIS APE'S
GOT AN ACHILLES' HEEL ♪
♪
NOW THAT'S ENTERTAINMENT!
♪
I'M SURE THEY WENT THIS WAY.
HUH?
GEORGE AND IRA?
WE ONLY ROBBED THE BANKS
FOR YOU, MR. BEDWETTER.
YEAH, WE HAD TO COVER ALL THEM
EXTRA THINGS, YOU KNOW.
WELL FROM NOW ON,
THE ONLY HOUSE
YOU'LL BE PLAYING
IS THE BIG HOUSE.
WELL, STAN, YOU DID GOOD.
YOU CAN HAVE YOUR OLD JOB BACK.
GREAT!
YOU CAN START BY CLEANING UP
THIS MESS.
GREAT.
♪
ALL RIGHT,
ONCE MORE FROM THE TOP!
♪ WE ARE INSANE,
AS YOU CAN SEE ♪
♪ WE'RE GOING TO MASTERMIND
A BIG CRIME SPREE ♪
♪ WE'LL RULE THE WORLD,
WE WILL NOT FAIL ♪
♪ IF ONLY WE COULD BREAK ♪
♪ OUT OF THIS JAIL ♪
WELL, WHAT DO YA KNOW?
A GIANT CHANDELIER.
HMMM, I GUESS WE FOUND ROOM IN
THE BUDGET AFTER ALL.
HA HA HA!
♪