The Mask (1995–1997): Season 1, Episode 6 - The Mask Is Always Greener on the Other Side: Part 2 - full transcript
♪ I gotcha with
my winnin' smile ♪
♪ I'm a livin' lesson
in flair and style ♪
♪ You just can't help
but stare at my savoir-faire ♪
♪ I'm Nouveau Deco Roman-Greco ♪
♪ Rococo Barroco
be-bop and hip hop ♪
♪ Uh flip flop
somebody stop me ♪
♪ Pretty Viridian
faces like mine ♪
♪ Don't come a dime a dozen ♪
♪ I stand out in a crowd ♪
♪ They went they made me
yeah they broke the mold ♪
♪ Wholesome and kind
staid and refined ♪
♪ Totally out of my mind ♪
♪ Arch-villains
and ne'er do wells ♪
♪ Had better learn
to decorate prison cells ♪
♪ Green goes with anything
if they ask see ♪
♪ Well there's one last
thing I gotta sing about ♪
♪ Open up wide
and really shout ♪
♪ Oh look out ♪
♪ This is the Mask ♪♪
S-S-Smokin'!
Huh.
What in tarnation..
[growls]
[grunts]
[screaming]
[shuddering]
Cold. So cold.
(Stanley)
'"A mysterious wave
of shadow thefts continues."'
"Experts at Edge City's
criminal investigations bureau"
"are stumped but many believe
it to be the work of..
...the Sinister Shadow Snatchers
of Saturn!"
[telephone ringing]
Edge City Savings
where we treat your money
like it's ours.
Yeah, Peggy!
Shadow Snatchers from Saturn?
Oh, please.
Peggy, you really gotta stop
borrowing your ideas
from bad movies.
Stanley, this one's true.
My phone's been ringing
off the hook.
It's happening everywhere.
Yeah, well, you just call me
Mr. Skeptical, okay.
I'll believe it when I see it
with my own eyes.
Charlie, what happened?
- Your shadow, it's-it's--
- Gone. Yeah, yeah, I know.
Yeah, but-but how?
What, haven't you
read the papers?
I got cocooned
by an amorphous black blob.
It's not like I really
need a shadow anyway.
Hair I need.
It's been thinning
at warp speed.
You were cocooned
by an amorphous black blob
and you're worried about
male pattern baldness?
Keep it down, will ya?
I don't want
any babes to hear.
Hey, hey, hey.
Maybe the shadowless look
will be in.
You know, the next big
fashion craze.
Yeah, that would just about
make up for the hair.
(Peggy)
Charlie's going bald?
[laughs]
You're missing the point.
He has no shadow.
Okay, come on, Peggy.
Spill the beans, will ya?
What's the shadow stealers
thing?
I-I want details.
Oh, how come, Mr. Skeptical?
Sound like this might be
a case for The Mask, hm?
(Stanley)
Against Sinister Shadow
Snatchers from Saturn?
I may be The Mask sometimes
but I'm not Captain Galaxy.
[Milo growling]
We'll talk
Shadow Snatchers later.
It's time to feed the beast.
[giggles]
We're almost home, Milo.
We'll, uh, we'll get you
some din-din, boy.
[eerie music]
[growling]
[gasps]
(Stanley)
'Oh. Nothing's there, Milo.'
[grunting]
Get out!
[Milo whimpering]
[shudders]
Cold.
No. No. No!
[groans]
[whimpers]
Saturn, my foot!
A shadow stealing shadows!
'But not for long.'
[crackling]
Shadow's coming home
to daddy!
[upbeat music]
As my threads are glaringly
not snazzy without it.
[swooshes]
S-S-Smokin'!
Hey! What do you know?
[crashing]
But first..
...eat up, Johnny.
(The Mask)
'Something is haunting
the streets of Edge City'
'Something wicked,
something weird.'
Good evening,
on tonight's episode
of "Really weird, bizarre,
way-out, funky, unbelievable
and unsolvable
mysterious happenings"
we tackle
the important questions
about the shadow-stealing
phenomenon.
One, who is behind it?
Two, what do they want?
And three,
will they give mine back?
[gasps]
Quick! Get a shot of this!
'There it is.'
Wait till I get
my hands on you.
Yah!
I got you now!
Take that and that!
And that, that, and that!
Steal my shadow, will you?
Well!
(girl)
'Hey, Mr. Green-head
warrior' man.
Why are you attackin'
the wall, huh, why?
Is it a bad wall?
Huh, mister?
'Are you punishin' it
'cause it's a bad wall?'
Are you teachin' it
a lesson? Are you, huh?
Uh...yeah.
You tell anyone about this
and I'll shave your head.
I swear I will.
A-ha!
'That citizen is in danger!'
I hope. I don't wanna
embarrass myself again.
Beware, miss!
H-e-l-p!
The Mask!
Hmm. Not the expected response
but, yes!
Run like the wind
and don't look back!
Aah! What's going on?
I'm blind!
(The Mask)
Somebody's gonna get
their shadow-butt kicked
that's what I think.
Now what's happening?
Come on,
let me out of here!
[grunting]
'Hello!'
'You better not be
taking me anywhere!'
[leaves rustling]
Just as I thought.
You did take me somewhere
and creepy, too.
[wind howling]
Bravo! Bravo!
Now pull a rabbit
out of a hat.
Come on. Just do it.
[whooping]
Mask, old buddy!
How ya been?
What, don't you recognize me?
It's me, Skillit.
Oh, I've been lookin'
all over the place for you.
Get off!
You're wrinkling my suit.
Now, I would appreciate you
returning my shadow
s'il vous plait,
l'enfant terrible.
Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry.
I-I, I never meant
to take your shadow.
[humming]
Ah, here it is.
No hard feelings, right?
Huh?
Hey, we're gonna have
some fun now.
Oh, Skillit and The Mask
together again
living life to the fullest.
Well, we're only on this earth
for a short while,
you know.
[chuckles]
Especially me.
(Skillit)
Hey, look, I gotta get back
into Shadowland
'before the evening's up.'
So come on, time's a-wastin'.
This city festers with
wholesome, good people.
Let's go slaughter
a bunch of innocents.
It'll be just like old times.
What do you say, huh?
I say, I don't wanna
hang around
no creepy face, floatin' in
midair, shadow snatching kid.
Now that I got
my shadow back.
I'm goin' to the Cocobongo
and they got a rule.
You gotta be this tall
to ride, shrimpy.
♪ Oh ohh ♪
♪ Grownups get to go to clubs
doo dah doo dah ♪
♪ Creepy kids are not allowed ♪
oh de doo dah day ♪♪
No, not yet.
Evidently, this Mask
is different from the others.
Let's find out who's
under that green skin
and then,
if we don't like him..
Yes.
We'll see if he bleeds.
[slurps]
[whining]
Hey, there, hotshot.
You cut a mean rug.
Where'd you learn those moves?
From me, of course.
[laughs]
What a groove machine
you are.
But, alas, all things groovy
must come to an end.
[screaming]
[crackling]
I don't believe it.
I mean you get all the way
to Mr. Shadow snatcher
and forget to bring
everyone else's back?
And you overfed Milo.
[Skillit laughing]
Oh, you're too cute.
Forgot the shadows.
[barking]
[zaps]
Milo!
[laughing]
I may not look like much
but I assure you
you could be sweeping scorched
fur and doggy bones right now.
Oh, yeah?
Okay, you look,
Mr. Little person.
I don't know what
you're doing here
but I think
you should give back
all those shadows you stole
right now, please?
Huh.
You're not like the others
at all, are you?
What do you mean "others"?
What others
are you talkin' about?
The others who've worn
that mask in your hand.
[chuckles]
You see, this may come
as a shock
but I'm over 4,000 years old
and I've known everyone
who's ever possessed the mask.
Or should I say
the mask has possessed.
Yes, the list
is 4,000 years long.
Attila, Blackbeard, Genghis.
The Hun? The pirate?
The Khan?
[chuckles]
Oh, yeah.
What a bunch of fun guys.
Those aren't fun guys.
Those are monsters who caused
suffering and-and terror.
Yeah, you say tomato,
I say tomahto.
He reminds me
of that Honest Abe character
to wear the mask.
I hate it when goody two-shoes
get the mask.
[gasps]
Let's go somewhere
we can talk.
(Stanley)
'Whoa!'
What? Stanley?
They're flying him to Saturn.
Hello, headline news.
[Milo groans]
[panting]
(Skillit)
You see, Stanley,
bein' over 4,000 years old
I get bored pretty easy.
Kids are the only fun people
to hang out with.
Problem is they're locked up
in school all day.
And adults?
Adults, oh, adults.
It's always, "Hey, let me tell
you what happened yesterday.
"My job, my future,
blah, blah, blah."
Adults are just plain boring.
Except for The Mask.
He's never boring.
He has a-a twisted
sense of humor
and realizes
the entertainment value
of a mindless rampage.
So, being that The Mask
is such a fun guy
to have around
a swell pal and all.
I'd like him to come back
to the Shadowland with me.
The Shadowland?
Oh, yeah.
The old hometown.
Man, me and The Mask
in Shadowland.
Now, that would be
some serious fun.
Nothin' more fun than agonizing
a Shadowlander.
[chuckles]
Hey, listen, Mr. Skillit.
Look, look, you got The Mask
all wrong.
It's not the mask
itself that's evil..
'or as you put it,
a fun guy'
'...it's whoever wears it.'
Okay, look, you see
Skillit, if a good guy
wears the mask
then The Mask
will be a good guy.
And I'm a good guy.
Well?
Tell it to the sidewalk.
Aah!
(Skillit)
'Oh, such a waste.'
However, there may be
no convincing
that goody two-shoes
but I know
I can get The Mask
to come to the Shadowland
with me.
[screaming]
Okay, okay.
Just keep the mask.
I get out of the Shadowland
every other cosmic event or so.
So you do your thing
with it, whatever
and when you're,
you know, done with it
I'll talk to the next guy.
How does that sound?
Does that sound fair?
Oh, yes.
Oh, that sounds very fair.
- Oh, yes, thank you.
- Oh, good.
After all, I'm eternal
and you're not.
No, wait!
Wait, Skillit!
Now, just one thing.
Uh, how do you stay eternal?
Why, I steal shadows,
silly boy.
- Shadows?
- Sure.
Nothing keeps you baby-faced
like the shadow of a mortal.
[chuckles]
But that must mean
you-you steal their youth?
Watch me.
[whistles]
Oh, shadow!
Sic 'em.
Peggy!
Peggy, look out!
Hey!
[grunting]
Cold. So cold.
See you around, Stan.
Hakuna matata.
Peggy. Charlie.
Easy. Okay.
[shudders]
Stanley, what's going on?
Uh, n-nothing, Peggy.
Look-look, you wait here.
I gotta check on Charlie.
I've, uh, you know I got this
hunch he might not be okay.
[banging on door]
Charlie!
Charlie!
[groans]
Charlie!
Yeah, I'm-I'm coming.
I'm coming.
Hold your horses.
Oh, I didn't hear
you break my door.
Charlie, Charlie, you're old.
Told you my hair
was thinning.
[groans]
Oh, turns out
losing your shadow
is a big deal after all.
Too bad.
Yeah, shadowless look
it would have been
a great craze.
Except for the rapid-aging part.
Stanley
something's happening to me.
Oh, if The Mask
doesn't do something and quick
every shadowless citizen
of Edge City
is gonna wither away.
[footsteps approaching]
[Milo groaning]
No! Milo!
Oh, not you too, buddy.
[slurping]
It's gonna be okay, boy.
You're gonna be alright, okay.
I'll take care of it.
[dramatic music]
There are certain things
in this world
which are taboo, forbidden,
verboten
and messin' with
innocent dogs and baby seals
is top of the list!
Time is running out.
I've stolen the shadows
of everyone
that goody two-shoes knows.
So, he should be showin' up
here any moment
wearing the mask.
You're up way past
your bedtime, junior.
Oh, Mask!
I know you came here
to take back those shadows
but let's go
to the Shadowland instead.
Come on, we'll boil
Shadowland denizens in oil
flay their skin
from their bodies
split their spines
like boiled lobsters.
What kind of sicko
do you think I am?
Say, could we give 'em
atomic wedgies?
Sure, sure, sure.
Atomic wedgies, nuclear pile
drivers, radioactive noogies
anything you want.
Okay, sounds good, buddy.
But first,
hand over the shadows.
No!
You're not taking my youth.
I'll give you a lick
of my sucker
and my one-of-a-kind
Rosey O'Grier rookie card
if you hand over the shadows.
No!
My shadows! My youth!
Selfish brat!
[zapping]
Bad for your teeth, anyway.
Let me out of here!
I'm gonna tell mom!
Mom!
Aah! Ooh!
Uff!
Hyah!
[sizzling]
Six, seven, eight, nine!
Nine and a half
nine and three quarters
nine and five-sixth
nine and seven-eighth.
Ladies and gentlemen,
in this corner
weighing 273 pounds,
8 ounces
The Masked Mask!
[crowd cheering]
I will destroy you!
[thudding]
[grunting]
What do you think of that,
huh, Mr. Smarty pants?
You give? You give?
Say uncle! Say uncle!
[bell chimes]
What?
It can't be the end
of a round already.
The 13th hour.
My time here's over.
What the heck is that?
The Shadowland!
I must enter
before the 13th chime.
That was number two.
You wanted me to go in there?
You're weirder than I thought.
[whimpering]
[bell chimes]
Don't you see?
If you come
to the Shadowland with me
we can screw around
like this all the time.
You will never have to be
that goody two-shoes again.
You could be The Mask forever.
Because Stanley Ipkiss would
completely cease to exist.
Well, why didn't you say
I could get rid of that
drippy-dork, neo-knob, gip-noid
Ipkiss in the first place?
You'll bet I'll go!
Yes!
All the fun we'll have!
The mayhem, the torture.
If you hand over the shadows.
[bell chimes]
No.
Oh, fine. You win.
I'll just get more
the next time I come out.
[crackling]
[bell continues chiming]
[instrumental music]
[panting]
Voila!
The shadows are returned.
And now, after you.
[growling]
(Skillit)
No! No fair!
No fair! You cheated!
Well, if that isn't the pot
calling the Skillit black.
[bell chimes]
Look at this, huh?
What about that, huh?
That's it.
Deal's off, Skillit.
You cheated
and I knew you would.
(The Mask)
'Ya-hah!'
Chime number 12!
I must return!
♪ Oh Milo ♪♪
No, no, no!
I'll lose my shadow,
my powers!
[wind whooshing]
[grunts]
Hey, it's 13 o'clock.
Do you know where
your children are?
You don't understand!
My powers are rooted
in my shadow.
Without my shadow,
I'm just n-n-normal!
And like any normal person,
I'll grow old.
In good time, cubby.
But first, we've got to get
somebody to school.
[sobbing]
Oh, no!
Anything but that!
Oh, yes, yes, yes.
But there's so much
to look forward to.
Your first report card,
your first bake sale
your first wedgie!
Oh, yeah, all the bullies
and class clowns
are gonna love the new
blue-faced, pointy-eared kid
'with the crazy shadowless
look.'
[laughs]
Oh, just wait till you
get a radioactive noogie.
Woo-hoo!
Nothing like it, baby.
Must snatch shadow.
Must, must regain youth.
Must, must..
my winnin' smile ♪
♪ I'm a livin' lesson
in flair and style ♪
♪ You just can't help
but stare at my savoir-faire ♪
♪ I'm Nouveau Deco Roman-Greco ♪
♪ Rococo Barroco
be-bop and hip hop ♪
♪ Uh flip flop
somebody stop me ♪
♪ Pretty Viridian
faces like mine ♪
♪ Don't come a dime a dozen ♪
♪ I stand out in a crowd ♪
♪ They went they made me
yeah they broke the mold ♪
♪ Wholesome and kind
staid and refined ♪
♪ Totally out of my mind ♪
♪ Arch-villains
and ne'er do wells ♪
♪ Had better learn
to decorate prison cells ♪
♪ Green goes with anything
if they ask see ♪
♪ Well there's one last
thing I gotta sing about ♪
♪ Open up wide
and really shout ♪
♪ Oh look out ♪
♪ This is the Mask ♪♪
S-S-Smokin'!
Huh.
What in tarnation..
[growls]
[grunts]
[screaming]
[shuddering]
Cold. So cold.
(Stanley)
'"A mysterious wave
of shadow thefts continues."'
"Experts at Edge City's
criminal investigations bureau"
"are stumped but many believe
it to be the work of..
...the Sinister Shadow Snatchers
of Saturn!"
[telephone ringing]
Edge City Savings
where we treat your money
like it's ours.
Yeah, Peggy!
Shadow Snatchers from Saturn?
Oh, please.
Peggy, you really gotta stop
borrowing your ideas
from bad movies.
Stanley, this one's true.
My phone's been ringing
off the hook.
It's happening everywhere.
Yeah, well, you just call me
Mr. Skeptical, okay.
I'll believe it when I see it
with my own eyes.
Charlie, what happened?
- Your shadow, it's-it's--
- Gone. Yeah, yeah, I know.
Yeah, but-but how?
What, haven't you
read the papers?
I got cocooned
by an amorphous black blob.
It's not like I really
need a shadow anyway.
Hair I need.
It's been thinning
at warp speed.
You were cocooned
by an amorphous black blob
and you're worried about
male pattern baldness?
Keep it down, will ya?
I don't want
any babes to hear.
Hey, hey, hey.
Maybe the shadowless look
will be in.
You know, the next big
fashion craze.
Yeah, that would just about
make up for the hair.
(Peggy)
Charlie's going bald?
[laughs]
You're missing the point.
He has no shadow.
Okay, come on, Peggy.
Spill the beans, will ya?
What's the shadow stealers
thing?
I-I want details.
Oh, how come, Mr. Skeptical?
Sound like this might be
a case for The Mask, hm?
(Stanley)
Against Sinister Shadow
Snatchers from Saturn?
I may be The Mask sometimes
but I'm not Captain Galaxy.
[Milo growling]
We'll talk
Shadow Snatchers later.
It's time to feed the beast.
[giggles]
We're almost home, Milo.
We'll, uh, we'll get you
some din-din, boy.
[eerie music]
[growling]
[gasps]
(Stanley)
'Oh. Nothing's there, Milo.'
[grunting]
Get out!
[Milo whimpering]
[shudders]
Cold.
No. No. No!
[groans]
[whimpers]
Saturn, my foot!
A shadow stealing shadows!
'But not for long.'
[crackling]
Shadow's coming home
to daddy!
[upbeat music]
As my threads are glaringly
not snazzy without it.
[swooshes]
S-S-Smokin'!
Hey! What do you know?
[crashing]
But first..
...eat up, Johnny.
(The Mask)
'Something is haunting
the streets of Edge City'
'Something wicked,
something weird.'
Good evening,
on tonight's episode
of "Really weird, bizarre,
way-out, funky, unbelievable
and unsolvable
mysterious happenings"
we tackle
the important questions
about the shadow-stealing
phenomenon.
One, who is behind it?
Two, what do they want?
And three,
will they give mine back?
[gasps]
Quick! Get a shot of this!
'There it is.'
Wait till I get
my hands on you.
Yah!
I got you now!
Take that and that!
And that, that, and that!
Steal my shadow, will you?
Well!
(girl)
'Hey, Mr. Green-head
warrior' man.
Why are you attackin'
the wall, huh, why?
Is it a bad wall?
Huh, mister?
'Are you punishin' it
'cause it's a bad wall?'
Are you teachin' it
a lesson? Are you, huh?
Uh...yeah.
You tell anyone about this
and I'll shave your head.
I swear I will.
A-ha!
'That citizen is in danger!'
I hope. I don't wanna
embarrass myself again.
Beware, miss!
H-e-l-p!
The Mask!
Hmm. Not the expected response
but, yes!
Run like the wind
and don't look back!
Aah! What's going on?
I'm blind!
(The Mask)
Somebody's gonna get
their shadow-butt kicked
that's what I think.
Now what's happening?
Come on,
let me out of here!
[grunting]
'Hello!'
'You better not be
taking me anywhere!'
[leaves rustling]
Just as I thought.
You did take me somewhere
and creepy, too.
[wind howling]
Bravo! Bravo!
Now pull a rabbit
out of a hat.
Come on. Just do it.
[whooping]
Mask, old buddy!
How ya been?
What, don't you recognize me?
It's me, Skillit.
Oh, I've been lookin'
all over the place for you.
Get off!
You're wrinkling my suit.
Now, I would appreciate you
returning my shadow
s'il vous plait,
l'enfant terrible.
Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry.
I-I, I never meant
to take your shadow.
[humming]
Ah, here it is.
No hard feelings, right?
Huh?
Hey, we're gonna have
some fun now.
Oh, Skillit and The Mask
together again
living life to the fullest.
Well, we're only on this earth
for a short while,
you know.
[chuckles]
Especially me.
(Skillit)
Hey, look, I gotta get back
into Shadowland
'before the evening's up.'
So come on, time's a-wastin'.
This city festers with
wholesome, good people.
Let's go slaughter
a bunch of innocents.
It'll be just like old times.
What do you say, huh?
I say, I don't wanna
hang around
no creepy face, floatin' in
midair, shadow snatching kid.
Now that I got
my shadow back.
I'm goin' to the Cocobongo
and they got a rule.
You gotta be this tall
to ride, shrimpy.
♪ Oh ohh ♪
♪ Grownups get to go to clubs
doo dah doo dah ♪
♪ Creepy kids are not allowed ♪
oh de doo dah day ♪♪
No, not yet.
Evidently, this Mask
is different from the others.
Let's find out who's
under that green skin
and then,
if we don't like him..
Yes.
We'll see if he bleeds.
[slurps]
[whining]
Hey, there, hotshot.
You cut a mean rug.
Where'd you learn those moves?
From me, of course.
[laughs]
What a groove machine
you are.
But, alas, all things groovy
must come to an end.
[screaming]
[crackling]
I don't believe it.
I mean you get all the way
to Mr. Shadow snatcher
and forget to bring
everyone else's back?
And you overfed Milo.
[Skillit laughing]
Oh, you're too cute.
Forgot the shadows.
[barking]
[zaps]
Milo!
[laughing]
I may not look like much
but I assure you
you could be sweeping scorched
fur and doggy bones right now.
Oh, yeah?
Okay, you look,
Mr. Little person.
I don't know what
you're doing here
but I think
you should give back
all those shadows you stole
right now, please?
Huh.
You're not like the others
at all, are you?
What do you mean "others"?
What others
are you talkin' about?
The others who've worn
that mask in your hand.
[chuckles]
You see, this may come
as a shock
but I'm over 4,000 years old
and I've known everyone
who's ever possessed the mask.
Or should I say
the mask has possessed.
Yes, the list
is 4,000 years long.
Attila, Blackbeard, Genghis.
The Hun? The pirate?
The Khan?
[chuckles]
Oh, yeah.
What a bunch of fun guys.
Those aren't fun guys.
Those are monsters who caused
suffering and-and terror.
Yeah, you say tomato,
I say tomahto.
He reminds me
of that Honest Abe character
to wear the mask.
I hate it when goody two-shoes
get the mask.
[gasps]
Let's go somewhere
we can talk.
(Stanley)
'Whoa!'
What? Stanley?
They're flying him to Saturn.
Hello, headline news.
[Milo groans]
[panting]
(Skillit)
You see, Stanley,
bein' over 4,000 years old
I get bored pretty easy.
Kids are the only fun people
to hang out with.
Problem is they're locked up
in school all day.
And adults?
Adults, oh, adults.
It's always, "Hey, let me tell
you what happened yesterday.
"My job, my future,
blah, blah, blah."
Adults are just plain boring.
Except for The Mask.
He's never boring.
He has a-a twisted
sense of humor
and realizes
the entertainment value
of a mindless rampage.
So, being that The Mask
is such a fun guy
to have around
a swell pal and all.
I'd like him to come back
to the Shadowland with me.
The Shadowland?
Oh, yeah.
The old hometown.
Man, me and The Mask
in Shadowland.
Now, that would be
some serious fun.
Nothin' more fun than agonizing
a Shadowlander.
[chuckles]
Hey, listen, Mr. Skillit.
Look, look, you got The Mask
all wrong.
It's not the mask
itself that's evil..
'or as you put it,
a fun guy'
'...it's whoever wears it.'
Okay, look, you see
Skillit, if a good guy
wears the mask
then The Mask
will be a good guy.
And I'm a good guy.
Well?
Tell it to the sidewalk.
Aah!
(Skillit)
'Oh, such a waste.'
However, there may be
no convincing
that goody two-shoes
but I know
I can get The Mask
to come to the Shadowland
with me.
[screaming]
Okay, okay.
Just keep the mask.
I get out of the Shadowland
every other cosmic event or so.
So you do your thing
with it, whatever
and when you're,
you know, done with it
I'll talk to the next guy.
How does that sound?
Does that sound fair?
Oh, yes.
Oh, that sounds very fair.
- Oh, yes, thank you.
- Oh, good.
After all, I'm eternal
and you're not.
No, wait!
Wait, Skillit!
Now, just one thing.
Uh, how do you stay eternal?
Why, I steal shadows,
silly boy.
- Shadows?
- Sure.
Nothing keeps you baby-faced
like the shadow of a mortal.
[chuckles]
But that must mean
you-you steal their youth?
Watch me.
[whistles]
Oh, shadow!
Sic 'em.
Peggy!
Peggy, look out!
Hey!
[grunting]
Cold. So cold.
See you around, Stan.
Hakuna matata.
Peggy. Charlie.
Easy. Okay.
[shudders]
Stanley, what's going on?
Uh, n-nothing, Peggy.
Look-look, you wait here.
I gotta check on Charlie.
I've, uh, you know I got this
hunch he might not be okay.
[banging on door]
Charlie!
Charlie!
[groans]
Charlie!
Yeah, I'm-I'm coming.
I'm coming.
Hold your horses.
Oh, I didn't hear
you break my door.
Charlie, Charlie, you're old.
Told you my hair
was thinning.
[groans]
Oh, turns out
losing your shadow
is a big deal after all.
Too bad.
Yeah, shadowless look
it would have been
a great craze.
Except for the rapid-aging part.
Stanley
something's happening to me.
Oh, if The Mask
doesn't do something and quick
every shadowless citizen
of Edge City
is gonna wither away.
[footsteps approaching]
[Milo groaning]
No! Milo!
Oh, not you too, buddy.
[slurping]
It's gonna be okay, boy.
You're gonna be alright, okay.
I'll take care of it.
[dramatic music]
There are certain things
in this world
which are taboo, forbidden,
verboten
and messin' with
innocent dogs and baby seals
is top of the list!
Time is running out.
I've stolen the shadows
of everyone
that goody two-shoes knows.
So, he should be showin' up
here any moment
wearing the mask.
You're up way past
your bedtime, junior.
Oh, Mask!
I know you came here
to take back those shadows
but let's go
to the Shadowland instead.
Come on, we'll boil
Shadowland denizens in oil
flay their skin
from their bodies
split their spines
like boiled lobsters.
What kind of sicko
do you think I am?
Say, could we give 'em
atomic wedgies?
Sure, sure, sure.
Atomic wedgies, nuclear pile
drivers, radioactive noogies
anything you want.
Okay, sounds good, buddy.
But first,
hand over the shadows.
No!
You're not taking my youth.
I'll give you a lick
of my sucker
and my one-of-a-kind
Rosey O'Grier rookie card
if you hand over the shadows.
No!
My shadows! My youth!
Selfish brat!
[zapping]
Bad for your teeth, anyway.
Let me out of here!
I'm gonna tell mom!
Mom!
Aah! Ooh!
Uff!
Hyah!
[sizzling]
Six, seven, eight, nine!
Nine and a half
nine and three quarters
nine and five-sixth
nine and seven-eighth.
Ladies and gentlemen,
in this corner
weighing 273 pounds,
8 ounces
The Masked Mask!
[crowd cheering]
I will destroy you!
[thudding]
[grunting]
What do you think of that,
huh, Mr. Smarty pants?
You give? You give?
Say uncle! Say uncle!
[bell chimes]
What?
It can't be the end
of a round already.
The 13th hour.
My time here's over.
What the heck is that?
The Shadowland!
I must enter
before the 13th chime.
That was number two.
You wanted me to go in there?
You're weirder than I thought.
[whimpering]
[bell chimes]
Don't you see?
If you come
to the Shadowland with me
we can screw around
like this all the time.
You will never have to be
that goody two-shoes again.
You could be The Mask forever.
Because Stanley Ipkiss would
completely cease to exist.
Well, why didn't you say
I could get rid of that
drippy-dork, neo-knob, gip-noid
Ipkiss in the first place?
You'll bet I'll go!
Yes!
All the fun we'll have!
The mayhem, the torture.
If you hand over the shadows.
[bell chimes]
No.
Oh, fine. You win.
I'll just get more
the next time I come out.
[crackling]
[bell continues chiming]
[instrumental music]
[panting]
Voila!
The shadows are returned.
And now, after you.
[growling]
(Skillit)
No! No fair!
No fair! You cheated!
Well, if that isn't the pot
calling the Skillit black.
[bell chimes]
Look at this, huh?
What about that, huh?
That's it.
Deal's off, Skillit.
You cheated
and I knew you would.
(The Mask)
'Ya-hah!'
Chime number 12!
I must return!
♪ Oh Milo ♪♪
No, no, no!
I'll lose my shadow,
my powers!
[wind whooshing]
[grunts]
Hey, it's 13 o'clock.
Do you know where
your children are?
You don't understand!
My powers are rooted
in my shadow.
Without my shadow,
I'm just n-n-normal!
And like any normal person,
I'll grow old.
In good time, cubby.
But first, we've got to get
somebody to school.
[sobbing]
Oh, no!
Anything but that!
Oh, yes, yes, yes.
But there's so much
to look forward to.
Your first report card,
your first bake sale
your first wedgie!
Oh, yeah, all the bullies
and class clowns
are gonna love the new
blue-faced, pointy-eared kid
'with the crazy shadowless
look.'
[laughs]
Oh, just wait till you
get a radioactive noogie.
Woo-hoo!
Nothing like it, baby.
Must snatch shadow.
Must, must regain youth.
Must, must..