The L Word (2004–2009): Season 3, Episode 2 - Lost Weekend - full transcript
Kit hires Billie Blaikie, a transvestite party promoter to get the business up at The Planet with a gambling night, while her son, David, quickly disapproves of Billie's presence. Meanwhile, Jenny wonders where she stands with Moira as they take an eventful road trip back to California, where they pose as a man-woman couple, encounter hateful redneck teens, and dance at a out-of-the-way gay bar for women. Back in Los Angeles, Carmen's overbearing mother attempts to turn Shane into a more feminine person prior to a family gathering. Following Mrs. Collie's advice, Bette and Tina try to find a male role model for Angelica leading them to hire Angus Partridge, a struggling musician to help. Helena tries to help Alice get over her obsession with Dana and becomes more depressed and dependent on anti-depressant pills after learning that everyone has forgotten about her birthday. Also, Dana deals with health problems after Lara feels a lump in her breast during a session of their lovemaking.
PREVIOUSLY ON THE L WORD...
ANGUS...
WOULD YOU BE INTERESTED
IN PLAYING FOR THE KIDS
AT ANGELICA'S
SIX-MONTH CELEBRATION?
THANKS. I... I COULD
REALLY USE THE CASH.
FEEL A LITTLE
STRESSED OUT TODAY.
WE'RE ABOUT TO HAVE A HOME VISIT
FROM AN ADOPTION SOCIAL WORKER.
WHAT ABOUT MEN? MEN?
YOU DO KNOW THAT
WE'RE LESBIANS, RIGHT?
DANA, WHO TOLD ME SHE NEEDED...
SHE NEEDED CLOSURE.
CLOSURE WITH LARA.
YOU HAVE A LUMP.
WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT?
I'M GOING TO MEET
CARMEN'S MOTHER.
MM-HMM. AND?
I'M GOING TO ACT STRAIGHT.
HOW PRETTY.
AH. THERE.
WANT TO COME TO L.A. WITH ME?
YEAH.
ARE YOU THINKING
ABOUT HAVING SEX
WITH ME RIGHT NOW?
IT'S CROSSED MY MIND.
WHO DID THAT TO YOU?
I DID IT TO MYSELF.
LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE
IS SWIMMING UP THE WRONG STREAM
TONIGHT, SUGAR.
I'M...
I'M LOOKING FOR SEX.
WELL, YOU'RE IN THE
WRONG PLACE, SWEETIE.
TRY THE SAFEWAY IN THE MARINA.
IT'S CRAWLING WITH
STRAIGHT, HOT MEN.
I'M LOOKING FOR GIRLS.
JUST A LITTLE
FURTHER DOWN, HONEY.
USUALLY AROUND THAT CORNER.
THANKS.
YOU'RE SWEET.
I'M LOOKING FOR SEX...
SEX...
I'M LOOKING FOR... GIRLS...
I'M LOOKING FOR GIRLS...
FUCK ME SO I FORGET WHO I AM.
IT'S TOO LATE TO STOP ME.
JESUS...
OH, JESUS.
♪ GIRLS IN TIGHT DRESSES
WHO DRAG WITH MUSTACHES ♪
♪ CHICKS DRIVING FAST
INGENUES WITH LONG LASHES ♪
♪ WOMEN WHO LONG, LOVE,
LUST WOMEN WHO GIVE ♪
♪ THIS IS THE WAY IT'S
THE WAY THAT WE LIVE ♪
♪ TALKING, LAUGHING
LOVING, BREATHING ♪
♪ FIGHTING, FUCKING
CRYING, DRINKING ♪
♪ WRITING, WINNING
LOSING, CHEATING ♪
♪ KISSING, THINKING, DREAMING ♪
♪ THIS IS THE WAY... ♪
♪ IT'S THE WAY THAT WE LIVE ♪
♪ IT'S THE WAY THAT WE LIVE ♪
♪ AND LOVE ♪
21.21.
I JUST WON.
HOW CAN I COUNT ROADKILL
WHEN I'M DRIVING THE WHOLE TIME?
I WON FAIR AND SQUARE,
SO AS THE WINNER, YOU
HAVE TO GIVE ME A PRESENT.
PLEASE.
ALL RIGHT.
OPEN THE GLOVE.
OH, MY GOD...
IT'S IN THAT BOX.
WAIT, WHAT ARE YOU
DOING WITH A GUN?
WHY DO YOU HAVE
A GUN IN YOUR CAR?
IT'S JUST A TASER.
IT'S LIKE THE COPS USE.
IT JUST SHOCKS PEOPLE.
I KNOW, BUT WHAT ARE YOU...
WHAT ARE YOU
GOING TO DO WITH IT?
IT'S JUST IN CASE.
YOU DECIDE TO ROB A 7-11?
LOOK, I'VE NEVER HAD TO USE IT.
IT'S JUST THAT...
I GET A LOT OF SHIT FROM PEOPLE,
AND I'M GOING TO
TAKE CARE OF MYSELF.
JUST GOING TO PUT THIS AWAY.
NOW, OPEN THE BOX
AND GET YOUR PRIZE ALREADY.
YES, MA'AM.
HOLY SHIT.
BUT BE CAREFUL.
IT'S ALL I GOT.
YOU KNOW...
YOU KNOW WHAT?
MAYBE WE SHOULD WAIT TILL WE GET
A LITTLE CLOSER TO L.A.
BEFORE WE DO SOME.
OKAY?
OKAY, UM...
DID YOU SPEAK
WITH THE CROUP... THE CROUP...
THE CROUPIER?
YEAH.
YEAH, OF COURSE I DID, KIT.
I SPOKE WITH EVERYBODY.
MM.
THE VENDORS,
ABSOLUT,
ELVIS AND ANN ARE DOING
A SOUND CHECK AT 5:00...
WELL, YOU KNOW THAT CARMEN IS...
YEAH, CARMEN'S DJing,
AND SHE'S BRINGING HER OWN SET,
AND ALSO, SHE'S GOING TO BE HERE
TO DO PLAYBACK AT
THE SOUND CHECK.
OKAY, WELL,
I GUESS YOU'RE JUST
MR. BILLIE-ON-THE-SPOT,
HMM?
SPIT-SPOT. THAT'S ME.
I'M HERE
TO LICK YOUR YOUNG 'UNS
INTO SHAPE.
I'M YOUR BOY, KIT...
AND FRANKLY,
I'M MUCH MORE QUALIFIED
TO RUN THIS PLACE
THAN YOU ARE.
JOKING.
BUT I GUARANTEE...
THAT AFTER TONIGHT,
YOU'RE GOING TO WANT
ME TO RUN THIS JOINT.
MM-HMM.
WE'LL SEE, MR. MARY P.
WELL, I THINK THE REASON
I WAS WITH LISA THE LESBIAN MAN
IS BECAUSE HE WASN'T
DANGEROUS FOR ME.
YOU KNOW, I JUST...
I KNEW I WOULDN'T
GET ADDICTED TO A GUY.
I ACTUALLY REMEMBER
HAVING THIS CONVERSATION
WITH MY FRIEND, TINA,
THAT, YOU KNOW, I THINK
GUYS ARE KIND OF EASY.
SORRY.
AND I WAS LOOKING
THROUGH THIS PAMPHLET HERE
ABOUT ALL THE DIFFERENT
KINDS OF LOVE ADDICTS,
AND I'M PRETTY SURE I'M A...
O.L.A.
OH, ME TOO.
YEAH, OBSESSIVE LOVE.
IT'S THE BEST.
I MEAN, WORST.
UH...
THERE'S NOTHING WORSE
THAN WHEN YOU CAN'T
LET GO OF SOMEONE
WHO'S COMPLETELY OVER YOU,
AND DISTANT, ABUSIVE,
CONTROLLING, DICTATORIAL...
EGOCENTRIC, UNLOVING,
SELFISH, UNABLE TO COMMIT...
YEAH, AND IT'S MY BIRTHDAY
THIS WEEK, AND I WAS...
HEY.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, ALICE.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY. HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
THANK YOU.
YEAH, I JUST...
YOU KNOW, IT'D BE GREAT IF
DANA WOULD JUST COME BY
AND, YOU KNOW, GIVE
ME A LITTLE PREZZIE,
NOTHING BIG...
YOU KNOW, MAYBE KISS
MY EYELIDS OR SOMETHING...
GET A GRIP GET A GRIP.
LET ALICE SHARE, PLEASE.
THANKS.
YEAH, I MEAN, I THINK...
I THINK YOU GUYS WOULD
BE OBSESSING, TOO,
BECAUSE OUR SEX...
WAS MINDBLOWINGLY...
UNFUCKINGLY UNBELIEVABLE,
AND IT JUST KIND OF, YOU KNOW...
IT MAKES YOU REALIZE
THAT THIS PERSON
COULD BE THE ONE
GREAT, TRUE LOVE
OF YOUR LIFE.
YOU KNOW?
BUT SHE'LL BE BACK.
SHE WILL BE BACK.
BECAUSE OUR LOVE...
OUR LOVE WAS TOO INTENSE, SO...
MOMMY LOVES YOU, TOO, DARLING.
YEAH, I'LL SEE YOU NEXT WEEK.
YOU HAVE A WONDERFUL
TIME AT THE BALLET.
I WISH I WAS COMING.
OKAY, SPEAK TO YOU TOMORROW.
BIG KISS. BYE.
I WONDER IF MOST LITTLE BOYS
GET THAT EXCITED
ABOUT THE BALLET?
HOW WAS IT?
IT SUCKED.
OH...
I HAVE A LITTLE
SURPRISE FOR YOU.
YOU DO? MM-HMM.
OH, GOD. I'M SO SORRY.
I'M SUCH A GROSS
BISEXUAL LOVE ADDICT
RIGHT NOW.
HI. I'M JANICE.
I KNOW YOU'RE
HAVING A HARD TIME,
AND I'M HERE TO
TAKE CARE OF YOU.
WE'RE AN EXCLUSIVELY
LESBIAN SERVICE.
DID YOU HIRE ME A HOOKER?
ALICE, IT'S A LESBIAN
CLEANING SERVICE.
"LEZ CLEAN UP."
SHE'S GOING TO SORT OUT
YOUR ENTIRE APARTMENT.
OH, MY GOD.
I LOVE YOU.
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
MY APARTMENT'S
SO DIRTY RIGHT NOW,
EVER SINCE, YOU KNOW...
I'M A BIG FAN OF THE CHART,
AND I'M SO SORRY ABOUT DANA.
SO SORRY.
OH. OKAY.
OH.
THANK YOU. THANKS.
OKAY, GREAT.
ALL RIGHT.
YOU'RE SO FUCKING BEAUTIFUL...
AND I'M GOING TO MAKE YOU
COME WHILE YOU'RE DRIVING, MISS.
MY GIRLFRIEND USED
TO GIVE ME HEAD
WHILE WE DROVE TO SCHOOL.
HEY, LADY...
I'M NOT YOUR EX,
AND I'M NOT YOUR GIRLFRIEND.
GOT IT?
RIGHT.
OH, FUCK.
WHAT?
SHIT.
WE RAN OUT OF GAS.
OH, NO.
DON'T STOP, JENNY.
KEEP GOING.
DON'T BLUE-BALL ME.
UM...
ALICE, DO YOU WANT
ME TO CLEAN UP
AROUND THIS...
AROUND THIS...
AROUND DANA?
ALICE, WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO
WITH THIS DANA THING?
ALICE IS IN THE LOO.
WHAT DANA THING?
JESUS BLOODY CHRIST.
ALICE!
WHAT?
WHAT THE FUCK, HELENA?
HAVE YOU COMPLETELY
LOST YOUR MIND?
YEAH, THAT'S...
THAT'S NO BIGGIE.
IT'S A FUCKING SHRINE, ALICE...
A BORDERING-ON-PSYCHOTIC,
SERIAL-KILLER-OBSESSIVE-TYPE
SHRINE.
DISMANTLE IT.
OH, GOD. NO, PLEASE.
LET IT LIVE. NO.
OKAY, OKAY, JUST... LET
ME KEEP THIS. PLEASE?
JUST LET ME KEEP THIS.
THIS WAS REALLY HARD TO GET.
I HAD TO GET IT IN THE
MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT.
YOU CAN TAKE THE SHRINE.
YOU CAN TAKE THE SHRINE.
JUST NOT THIS.
GET A BOX.
THERE'S A BOX.
NOT THAT BOX.
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED
OF YOURSELF, ALICE.
IT'S TIME TO START
GETTING OVER DANA.
NOW...
HERE'S WHAT WE'RE GOING TO DO.
I'VE TRIED. I'VE
BEEN TO MEETINGS...
JUST LISTEN.
OKAY?
I DIDN'T HAVE A CHANCE
TO WASH EVERYTHING, SO...
GREAT.
I HAVE TO PEE.
DON'T LOOK.
HEY.
OH, MY GOD.
HOW DO YOU... HOW
DO YOU DO THAT?
I ALWAYS HAVE, EVEN
WHEN I WAS LITTLE.
WHEN MY DAD CAUGHT
ME, HE POPPED ME ONE.
AH!
HELLO.
HELLO. PLEASE STOP.
SAVED.
WELL, HEY THERE, FELLA.
OH, SHE'S NOT A...
LOOKS LIKE YOU NEED SOME HELP.
YEAH, WE RAN OUT OF GAS.
NOT A PROBLEM.
I'LL SIPHON SOME OUT OF THE R.V.
MY NAME'S HAL, BY THE WAY.
HI.
HI. I'M JENNY. NICE TO MEET YOU.
THAT'S MY WIFE, MARTHA.
HELLO, MARTHA.
WE GOT SOME FRIED CHICKEN
IN THE CAMPER,
IF YOU AND YOUR HUSBAND
ARE HUNGRY.
YES, I WOULD LOVE
SOME FRIED CHICKEN.
THANK YOU.
WHAT DID YOU SAY
YOUR NAME WAS, SON?
UH, IT'S MAX.
THANK YOU, BABY.
YOU'RE WELCOME.
MM.
YOU TWO ARE SO HOT TOGETHER.
AT LEAST SOMEONE'S GETTING
A LITTLE SOMETHIN'-SOMETHIN'.
SO, UH...
WHAT'S UP WITH THE
SLOT MACHINE, KIT?
YEAH, WELL, YOU
KNOW BILLIE BLAIKIE.
HE DOESN'T DO ANYTHING SMALL.
SO YOU GUYS ARE COMING, RIGHT?
IT WON'T BE VEGAS WITHOUT YOU.
WAIT A MINUTE.
ARE YOU TALKING
ABOUT THE BILLIE BLAIKIE?
BILLIE BLAIKIE?
DUDE, HE IS, LIKE, THE
BEST PARTY PROMOTER
IN TOWN.
KIT WAS THINKING
ABOUT HIRING HIM
AS HER NEW MANAGER.
OH, MY GOSH.
CONGRATULATIONS, LADY.
YEAH, IT'S GREAT IF HE
CAN KEEP IT IN HIS PANTS
LONG ENOUGH TO
CLOSE OUT THE BAR.
OH, I'M SORRY.
BEFORE WE FORGET...
BUT WE CAN'T MAKE IT
TO YOUR BABY BIRTHDAY
PARTY TOMORROW,
BECAUSE WE HAVE A QUINCEAN...
OH, THAT'S RIGHT,
THE QUINCEANERA.
YEAH, THE QUINCEANERA.
DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.
IT'S JUST REALLY AN EXCUSE
TO HAVE A BABY PLAY GROUP,
AND HALF BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION.
I DON'T GET IT. WHAT'S A...
WHAT'S A QUINCE...
A QUINCEANERA.
QUINCEANERA.
THEY'RE PLANNING A SURPRISE
BIRTHDAY PARTY FOR ME.
BIG BIRTHDAY PARTY TO
CELEBRATE A GIRL TURNING 15,
AND IT'S MY COUSIN'S
BIRTHDAY, SO...
I ALMOST THOUGHT THEY FORGOT.
OKAY, SHH. JUST WALK UP.
SO IT'S KIND OF
LIKE A BAT MITZVAH.
WITH TAMALES.
HI. HEY.
WHAT ARE YOU GUYS TALKING ABOUT?
WE'RE HAVING A PARTY FOR
ANGELICA'S SIXTH MONTH.
DO YOU WANT TO COME?
I WOULD LOVE TO COME
TO THAT SIX-MONTH-OLD
BIRTHDAY PARTY.
I WOULD... CAN I...
I'D LOVE TO BRING HELENA.
ALICE...
HELENA.
I THINK SHE SHOULD BE THERE.
I THINK IT'S TIME, BETTE.
WELL, THEY ARE GOOD FRIENDS.
YEAH, THEY'RE
ALWAYS HANGING OUT.
WELL, LISTEN, HELENA,
IF YOU REALLY DON'T
HAVE ANYTHING ELSE TO DO,
THEN THAT WOULD BE FINE
IF YOU CAME TO THE PARTY.
THANK YOU.
THAT'S... REALLY SWEET OF YOU,
BUT YOU KNOW,
YOU REALLY DON'T HAVE... TO...
SHE DOES.
WHAT THE HELL ARE
YOU DOING IN HERE, BOY?
CAN'T YOU READ?
THIS IS THE LADIES' ROOM.
GET THE FUCK OUT.
I'M A GIRL.
HEY.
HEY.
I GOT YOU SOME LUNCH.
HEY, LET'S TAKE OFF, OKAY?
WHY?
CAN WE EAT FIRST?
YOU SEE THAT FREAK THERE?
IT WAS JUST IN THE
GIRLS' BATHROOM.
MUST BE A FAGGOT.
FAGGOT.
FAGGOT!
HEY, FAGGOT!
WHAT DID YOU SAY?
JUST LET IT GO, JENNY.
JOHNNY, YOU'RE CRAZY!
I CALLED YOU A FAGGOT.
OH, MY GOD. I CAN'T BELIEVE IT.
LOOK, MAN, WE DON'T
WANT ANY TROUBLE, OKAY?
NO, I DON'T WANT
ANY TROUBLE EITHER.
JUST WANT TO GET OUT AND TALK?
YOU WANT TO HAVE A LITTLE TALK?
LOOK, WE'RE OUT
OF HERE, ALL RIGHT?
DUDE, LEAVE US ALONE.
FUCK YOU, FAGGOT.
GET OUT OF THE TRUCK! SHIT.
NO... NO!
LET HER GO.
SHUT UP, YOU BITCH FREAK.
IS THIS YOUR FUCKING BOYFRIEND?
JENNY, GET BACK...
DOES HE FUCK YOU LIKE A MAN?
WHOO!
GET BACK IN THE TRUCK, JENNY.
YEAH, JENNY, GET
BACK IN THE TRUCK,
AND I'LL SHOW YOU HOW
A REAL MAN CAN FUCK.
WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?
GET BACK IN THE FUCKING TRUCK,
AND I'LL SHOW YOU HOW
A REAL MAN CAN FUCK...
YEAH?
JESUS CHRIST.
FUCKER.
WELL, THERE'S YOUR FAGGOT BACK.
COME ON, JENNY.
WHY DON'T YOU GIVE ME A CALL
WHEN YOU'RE READY
FOR A REAL MAN,
AND WE CAN HAVE SOME FUN THEN.
SURE, DUDE. NO PROBLEM.
DON'T TOUCH HIM!
HEY.
WE'RE NOT FAGGOTS.
WE'RE DYKES, YOU ASSHOLE.
FUCK YOU!
YOU'RE GOING TO
FUCKING DIE, BITCH!
YOU DISGUSTING BITCH!
FUCK YOU!
I HOPE HE'S ALL RIGHT.
FUCK HIM.
IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN A REAL GUN.
GIRLS, BOYS, PUNKS, FREAKS,
BUTCHES, FEMMES, KINGS, QUEENS,
TRANNIES, TRAINEES,
LADIES...
AND GENTLEMEN...
I AM BILLIE BLAIKIE, YOUR
HOST FOR THIS EVENING,
AND WELCOME TO THE PLANET'S
FIRST ANNUAL CASINO NIGHT...
"VULVA LAS VEGAS"!
AND LET'S HEAR IT
FOR OUR CUTE LITTLE DJ, CARMEN!
ANYWAY, THE MONEY YOU'RE
GOING TO RAISE TONIGHT
WILL GO TO AIDS
PROJECT LOS ANGELES.
LET'S HEAR IT FOR
AIDS PROJECT. YES, YES.
THAT'S A MUCH, MUCH BETTER CAUSE
THAN THE PORN WEBSITES
YOU NORMALLY
SPEND YOUR MONEY ON,
YOU DIRTY, DIRTY GIRL.
IN A FEW MOMENTS,
ALL BETS WILL BE OFF,
BECAUSE THE BIG
SHOW IS ABOUT TO START,
SO GET YOUR LAST FEW
GAMES IN, MY DARLINGS.
YOU DIRTY, DIRTY, DIRTY GIRL.
AND AS FOR ME...
I'M OFF TO A LITTLE LEAGUE GAME.
OH, COME ON.
DISGRUNTLED WOMEN... COME ON.
LOOSEN UP, LESBIANS.
I KNOW YOU DON'T WANT TO TALK
ABOUT ALL THAT COCK AND
CONDOM STUFF, DO YOU?
NO.
YOU WANT TO...
YOU WANT TO
CELEBRATE THE SNATCH!
YOU WANT TO VENERATE THE VAGINA!
YOU WANT TO PRAISE THE PUSSY!
WELL, REST ASSURED,
WE ALL WANT TO
PRAISE THE PUSSY HERE.
OKAY, KEEP DRINKING, EVERYBODY,
BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT
HAPPENS WHEN YOU KEEP DRINKING...
EVERYONE LOOKS CUTER.
AND P.S., HERE'S THE MONEY.
OH, DO YOU THINK THIS IS IT?
YEAH.
LOOKS LIKE A TYPICAL
SMALL-TOWN GAY BAR.
COME ON. LET'S GET INSIDE.
NO WHAMMIES.
WOW.
NICE. NICE JOB.
IT'S JUST AN IDEA...
BUT TRY 32 RED.
NO, NO, THOSE ARE
YOUR CHIPS. REALLY.
SHANE, YOU CAN'T.
JUST TAKE THEM AND TRY.
BET THE LOT, BETTE.
YOU LOOK LUCKY TONIGHT.
SHE IS LUCKY. SHE'S MY SISTER.
COME ON, GIRL.
COME ON. PUT IT DOWN.
COME ON, GIRL.
ALL RIGHT. HERE WE GO.
ALL RIGHT. LOAD IT UP.
32 RED.
OH, MY GOD. I ACTUALLY WON.
THANK YOU.
THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.
NO, NO, NO, THIS IS
YOUR PERCENTAGE.
NO, I WANT YOU TO HAVE IT.
DENTAL DAMS, LADIES. SAFE.
KEEP IT SAFE. KEEP IT SAFE.
PLACE YOUR BETS, PLEASE.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
PLACE YOUR BETS.
THANKS.
HEY.
I COULD USE A FEW OF
THOSE OVER HERE, HUH?
WHO'S MY TIGER?
♪ MILES AWAY... ♪
AND TWO MORE
TEQUILA HERE, LADIES.
THANK YOU.
I THINK I KNOW WHO'LL BE
TAKING WHO HOME TONIGHT.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
I WANT TO ROCK!
I WANT TO ROCK!
ROCK ME!
LET'S GO LOOK AROUND.
♪ IT HANGS IN MY HAIR AND
THE HEMS OF MY CLOTHES ♪
♪ I THOUGHT IN THE MADNESS
MY ARMS COULD NOT HOLD ♪
♪ I CAN'T TELL YOU WHY
'CAUSE I LONG TO BE ♪
♪ FORGIVEN ♪
♪ SO FAR AWAY ♪
HEY. HEY.
DO YOU WANT TO DANCE?
COME ON.
TWO MORE TEQUILAS?
TEQUILA? SURE THING.
THANK YOU.
♪ PORCH LIGHT
BURNS SO FAR AWAY ♪
♪ MILES AWAY ♪
THANKS.
THANK YOU.
EXCUSE ME.
HI. CAN WE GO?
NOW?
YEAH, IF... WHAT'S YOUR NAME?
KATRINA.
YEAH, IF, KATRINA,
YOU DON'T MIND.
I'M SORRY.
I DIDN'T KNOW YOU
TWO WERE TOGETHER.
WELL, YOU DO NOW. WE'RE NOT.
BYE.
♪ FORGIVEN... ♪
SO HAVE YOU SEEN DAVID YET?
IS HE HERE?
UH, NO, I HAVEN'T SEEN HIM.
I HAVEN'T SEEN HIM AT ALL.
SO, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF BILLIE?
WELL, THE PLACE IS PACKED.
WHAT?
YOU DON'T LIKE HIM?
"I'M ON MY WAY TO A
LITTLE LEAGUE GAME"?
OH, HE WAS JUST PLAYING.
IT WAS A JOKE.
IT'S NOT EVEN REMOTELY FUNNY.
GUYS AND DOLLS,
I GIVE YOU ELVIS, THE KING,
AND MISS KITTEN
WITH A WHIP HERSELF,
ANN-MARGRET!
THANKS, BILLIE, YOU NUT.
OH, HEY THERE, KIDS.
TWIST, TWIST.
LOOK AT THIS PLACE, ELVIS.
WHAT A BLOWOUT!
♪ SHE LOVES ME ♪
♪ THE LADY LOVES
ME AND IT SHOWS ♪
♪ IN SPITE OF THE WAY ♪
♪ SHE TURNS UP HER NOSE ♪
♪ I'M HER IDEAL HER
HEART'S DESIRE ♪
♪ UNDER THAT ICE ♪
♪ SHE'S BURNING LIKE FIRE ♪
♪ SHE'D LIKE TO
CUDDLE UP WITH ME ♪
♪ SHE'S PLAYING HARD TO GET ♪
♪ THE LADY LOVES ME ♪
♪ BUT SHE DOESN'T KNOW IT YET ♪
♪ THE GENTLEMAN
HAS SAVOIR FAIRE ♪
♪ AS MUCH AS AN ELEPHANT ♪
♪ OR A BEAR ♪
♪ I'D LIKE TO TAKE
HIM FOR A SPIN... ♪
WHOA, WHAT'S GOING ON IN HERE?
HEY. DAVID.
THIS LOOKS LIKE A NIGHTMARE.
OH, THIS IS ANOTHER
WILD NIGHT AT THE PLANET.
♪ ...SOGGY CIGARETTE ♪
♪ THE LADY LOVES HIM ♪
♪ BUT HE DOESN'T KNOW IT YET ♪
SHE SAID YOU
WANTED TO TALK TO ME.
YEAH. YEAH, I DO.
HEY, DAVID!
SO, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
WELL, I THINK THAT THEY'RE...
WELL, THEY'RE FREAKS,
AND THIS KIND OF
NONSENSE ATTRACTS FREAKS
TO YOUR ONCE
RESPECTABLE ESTABLISHMENT.
OOH.
YOU KNOW WHAT?
FOR A MINUTE,
I WAS SERIOUSLY CONSIDERING
SHAGGING YOU, MR. IZOD,
BUT YOU'RE NOT A
VERY NICE FELLOW,
ARE YOU?
BILLIE, THIS IS DAVID WATERS.
THIS IS KIT'S SON.
ENCHANTE, THEN, DARK STAR.
AND DAVID,
THIS IS BILLIE BLAIKIE,
MY NEW MANAGER.
OH!
AND YOU WON'T
REGRET IT, MY DARLING.
SEE YOU LATER.
YOUR NEW MANAGER?
DAVID, DON'T YOU GO
PASSING JUDGMENT ON HIM.
THAT MAN HAS DONE MORE
FOR THIS COMMUNITY THAN...
KIT, KIT,
DAVID HAS A RIGHT
TO HIS OPINION.
I KNOW HE DOES,
BUT YOU KNOW,
LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING...
IT GIVES ME GREAT JOY TO
SEE THESE PEOPLE IN HERE
LAUGHING, AND PARTYING,
AND LIVING THE LIFE THEY LOVE,
AND LOVING THE LIFE THEY LIVE,
AND I CAN SEE
THAT YOU JUST CAN'T GET
DOWN WITH THAT, CAN YOU?
NO, MOM, I CAN'T
GET DOWN WITH THAT.
JUST...
GIVE ME THAT.
I'LL SEE YOU BOTH LATER.
KIT, I REALLY NEED HIM
TO BE THERE TOMORROW
WHEN ROBERTA COLLIE SHOWS UP.
I KNOW. I KNOW.
OKAY?
I'LL TALK TO HIM.
I JUST NEED TO
SLEEP IT OFF, OKAY?
HE'S SUCH AN
ARROGANT LITTLE PRICK.
♪ I SAID THE LADY LOVES ME ♪
♪ THE GENTLEMAN'S ALL... WET ♪
ARE YOU GOING TO
TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT,
OR ARE YOU JUST
GOING TO SIT THERE
ACTING ALL WEIRD AND SILENT?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
WHAT DO I WANT?
I MEAN, YOU SAY
YOU DON'T WANT TO
BE MY GIRLFRIEND,
AND THEN YOU GOT ALL WEIRD
AND JEALOUS GIRLFRIEND ON ME
BACK THERE.
I KNOW.
THAT WAS...
THAT WAS FUCKED UP.
DO YOU WANT TO BE
MY OUTLAW GIRLFRIEND,
JENNY?
DO YOU WANT TO BE MY FRIEND?
DO YOU JUST WANT TO BE
MY FUCK BUDDY ON THE ROAD?
WHAT DO YOU WANT?
I WANT YOU TO GET
UP AGAINST THE WALL.
GO ON.
ALL RIGHT.
NOW UNBUTTON YOUR SHIRT.
OPEN.
WOW.
TELL ME YOU WANT ME TO FUCK YOU.
YOU NEVER LET ME FUCK YOU.
NO.
I CAN'T.
I'M SORRY.
I'M SORRY.
COME HERE.
COME ON.
TINA?
MM-HMM.
ARE YOU AWAKE?
MM-HMM.
I'M SCARED.
IT'S OKAY, BABY...
WHAT IF I CAN'T ADOPT HER?
WHAT IF I CAN'T FIND A
JOB THAT I REALLY LOVE?
WHAT IF WE LOSE THE HOUSE?
I JUST... I FEEL LIKE...
I FEEL LIKE I DON'T HAVE
ANY CONTROL OVER ANYTHING.
I MEAN, I DON'T KNOW
WHAT'S GOING ON WITH US.
I DON'T KNOW IF IT'S JUST
ALL THE CHANGES, AND...
TINA?
TINA?
HI, LITTLE FOXY BROWN.
YOU DO LOOK A LITTLE LIKE ME...
YOU SEE?
SHE'S NOT LISTENING
TO ANYTHING I SAY.
OH, I HEARD YOU.
I'M SUPPOSED TO
TAKE PROGESTERONE
TO HELP ME WITH THE CRAZIES,
BUT WHAT ARE YOU GONNA TAKE
TO HELP YOU WITH YOUR BIGOTRY?
KIT, I THOUGHT WE AGREED.
I'M SORRY.
YOU'RE RIGHT.
WE ARE GOING TO
PUT THIS ALL BEHIND US
SO WE CAN AGREE TO DISAGREE
SO DAVID WILL HELP US OUT TODAY.
HI, BABY.
OH...
OKAY, SO TELL ME WHY I'M HERE.
WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU LADIES?
UH, WELL...
DAVID...
DO YOU WANT TO HOLD
HER FOR A LITTLE WHILE?
GO TO YOUR UNCLE
DAVID FOR A LITTLE WHILE.
UM...
THERE'S A WOMAN COMING OVER
IN JUST A LITTLE WHILE,
AND WE WANTED HER TO SEE HOW
GREAT YOU ARE WITH ANGELICA.
YOU MIND IF I ASK WHY?
SHE'S OUR ADOPTION CASEWORKER,
AND SHE'S MAKING HER
SECOND HOME VISIT TODAY,
AND ONE OF HER BIG CONCERNS
WAS WHETHER OR NOT...
IS THAT HER ALREADY?
WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.
ONE OF HER...
BIG CONCERNS WAS WHETHER OR NOT
ANGELICA HAD AN
IMPORTANT MAN IN HER LIFE,
AND WE JUST THOUGHT
IT WOULD REASSURE HER
TO LET HER SEE
YOU WITH ANGELICA.
SO THAT SHE COULD SEE THAT
YOU'RE ANGELICA'S MAIN MAN.
YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?
HI, ROBERTA.
I SHOULD BE ALL RIGHT NOW.
OKAY.
LET US KNOW IF YOU NEED
ANY MORE HELP, MA'AM.
WE'RE JUST IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD.
THANK YOU. YOU'RE TOO KIND.
I'M SORRY. I CAN'T.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN, YOU CAN'T?
ROBERTA, YOU
REMEMBER KIT PORTER,
BETTE'S SISTER,
AND THIS IS HER SON,
DAVID, ANGELICA'S COUSIN.
I DON'T BELIEVE IN GAY ADOPTION.
I THINK THAT A
CHILD IS BEST RAISED
HAVING BOTH
A MOTHER AND A FATHER,
AND I THINK THAT SHE WILL SUFFER
LATER ON
IN THE ABSENCE
OF TRADITIONAL FAMILY VALUES,
SO I'M AFRAID
THAT IT WOULD BE
HYPOCRITICAL OF ME
TO STAND HERE AND
TO VOUCH FOR YOU...
ESPECIALLY IN FRONT OF
A GOVERNMENT OFFICIAL.
SORRY.
IT WAS NICE TO MEET YOU, MA'AM.
WELL...
I'M GLAD TO SEE
SOMEONE IN YOUR FAMILY
HAS PROPER RESPECT
FOR THE GOVERNMENT.
THIS IS CALLED THE
ULTIMATE PATRIOT ACT.
IT'S BY A GUERILLA GIRL.
I LOVE IT.
TINA HATES IT.
WHAT, SHE HATES THIS PIECE?
WELL, THAT'S GOOD.
WE WANT THE WORK
TO ELICIT STRONG REACTIONS.
NOT FROM MY LIFE PARTNER.
I WANT MY PARTNER TO SUPPORT ME.
WHAT, UNCONDITIONALLY?
I DON'T KNOW.
I MEAN, WHY SHOULDN'T I EXPECT
THE PERSON THAT I'M
CLOSEST TO IN THE WORLD
TO TRY TO SEE THINGS
FROM MY POINT OF VIEW
INSTEAD OF CHALLENGING ME
AND QUESTIONING MY CONVICTIONS
ALL THE TIME?
I GET ENOUGH OF THAT
FROM THE WORLD AT LARGE.
ARE YOU AND TINA OKAY?
I MEAN, I KNOW IT'S
HARD WITH A NEW BABY.
WE DON'T REALLY TALK ANYMORE.
WE JUST HAVE
ARGUMENTS ABOUT MONEY,
AND ARGUMENTS ABOUT BABYSITTERS,
AND ARGUMENTS ABOUT
BREAST-FEEDING SCHEDULES.
WE HAD THIS...
WE HAD THIS HIDEOUS MEETING
WITH THE ADOPTION SOCIAL WORKER
THIS MORNING.
I'M SORRY.
I'M SORRY, JULIA.
YOU REALLY DON'T
NEED THIS RIGHT NOW.
LOOK, I HAVE TWO OTHER
PIECES THAT I CAN SHOW YOU.
HAVE YOU TALKED TO TINA?
MAYBE IF THE TWO OF YOU
SAW SOMEONE TOGETHER...
WE'VE BEEN TO THERAPY.
WE'VE SEEN THREE
DIFFERENT THERAPISTS
IN THREE YEARS, SO...
BETTE...
HAVE YOU EVER HEARD
OF MARK EPSTEIN?
IS HE AN ARTIST?
HE'S GIVING A TALK TONIGHT.
HE'S A PSYCHIATRIST,
BUT HE'S ALSO
AN EMINENT BUDDHIST PHILOSOPHER
AND AUTHOR.
OH, RIGHT.
HE WROTE THOUGHTS
WITHOUT A THINKER.
I REMEMBER EVERYBODY
WAS READING THAT
WHEN I FIRST MOVED TO NEW YORK.
WELL, HE'S GOT A NEW BOOK.
IT'S CALLED OPEN TO DESIRE.
OPEN TO DESIRE?
I THOUGHT BUDDHISM WAS
ABOUT FREEDOM FROM DESIRE.
I THOUGHT DESIRE
WAS SUPPOSED TO BE
THE ROOT OF ALL
EVIL OR SOMETHING.
MARK'S GOT A LOT TO
SAY ON THE SUBJECT.
I THINK IT MIGHT
RESONATE FOR YOU.
SHANE?
SHANE, COME OUT.
COME ON OUT. LET ME SEE.
OH, MY GOD.
YOU LOOK LIKE YOU'RE FIVE.
I FEEL LIKE A PINATA.
YOU'RE TOO SMALL TO BE A PINATA,
BUT HOW ABOUT THE TOP
OF A TRANNY WEDDING CAKE?
YOU'RE NOT HELPING ME.
I'M SORRY. I'M SORRY, BABY.
THAT WASN'T FUNNY, WAS IT?
LET ME SEE.
WELL...
IT'S OKAY.
OH, COME HERE. COME HERE.
DOES THIS HELP YOU AT ALL?
NO.
NO?
MM-MM.
YO QUIERO LAMER TE...
HASTA QUE TE VENGAS
EN MI BOCA MIL VECES.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
MM...
"I'M GOING TO LICK YOU
"UNTIL YOU COME IN MY MOUTH
A THOUSAND TIMES."
OH...
WOW... WHAT ARE THESE?
OH.
WHAT ARE WE GOING
TO DO ABOUT THE SHOES?
WHAT?
YOU CAN'T WEAR THOSE SHOES.
YOU HAVE TO CHANGE THEM.
NO. YES.
STAY HERE.
I'M GOING TO GET YOU A
PAIR OF CHA-CHA HEELS.
HI.
HI.
HI THERE. WHO ARE YOU?
ROLAND.
ARE YOU THE CLOWN?
I'M THE BIRTHDAY GIRL, ROLAND.
AND YES, YES, I'M THE CLOWN.
MOMMY, MOMMY!
THE CLOWN'S HERE!
OH, MY GOD.
JANE, YOU LOOK TAN BONITA.
LOOK, EVERYBODY.
HOLA, EVERYONE.
HOLA!
THIS IS CARMEN'S FRIEND, JANE.
SHE'S WEARING MY DRESS.
WHERE IS MARISELA?
SHOULDN'T SHE BE HERE
GETTING READY
WITH THE REST OF US?
SHE'S PROBABLY OUTSIDE
SMOKING CIGARETTES,
LIKE YOU DID
FOR YOUR QUINCEANERA.
AY, CALLATE.
CARMEN...
HUH?
YOUR MAMA WAS IN
RICARDO LOPEZ'S CAR,
MAKING OUT WITH HIM,
UP UNTIL THE CHURCH WAS FILLED.
MAMITA.
YOU NEVER TOLD ME THAT STORY.
THAT'S BECAUSE IT
WASN'T TRUE, MIJA.
SI, ES LA VERDAD.
WAS CARMEN GOOD
DURING HER QUINCEAN...
QUINCEANERA?
YEAH, QUINCEANERA.
SHE WAS AN ANGEL, ALWAYS.
CARMEN WAS THE NUNS' FAVORITE.
ISN'T THAT TRUE, CARMENCITA?
OKAY. IT'S JANE'S TURN NOW.
COME ON, JANE.
OH, MOM, NO...
NO, I-I-I... UM...
SUCH A PRETTY FACE.
I'LL MAKE YOU LOOK BEAUTIFUL.
COME. COME.
IT'S OKAY. IT'S OKAY.
OOPS. YOU OKAY?
SIT.
JANE, YOUR HAIR
IS A LITTLE UNEVEN.
YOU WANT ME TO CUT IT STRAIGHT?
NO!
I MEAN, NO, UM... THANK YOU...
I THINK...
OKAY, OKAY.
IT'S GOOD. THANKS.
I HAVE ANOTHER IDEA.
GIRLS, UM...
I'M SORRY TO INTRUDE, BUT...
WE HAVE A BIT OF A DISASTER
ON OUR HANDS.
YEAH, THE FOOD IS DISGUSTING
AND PEOPLE ARE STARVING.
WE'RE AWARE.
ACTUALLY, UM...
IT'S ALICE.
SHE WAS UNDER THE
MISAPPREHENSION
THAT THIS WAS A
SURPRISE BIRTHDAY PARTY
FOR HER.
OH, SHIT.
IT'S ALICE'S BIRTHDAY.
I FORGOT.
ME TOO.
WHO DO YOU HAVE
TO FUCK AROUND HERE
TO GET A BEER?
SORRY.
KIDDIE PARTY.
HEY, EVERYBODY.
HEY, EVERYBODY.
IT'S TIME FOR CAKE.
IT'S TIME FOR CAKE.
CAKE TIME.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
THAT'S REALLY COOL.
WOW.
WELL... YEAH.
CAN I HAVE HER?
DO YOU WANT TO
BLOW OUT THE CANDLE?
READY, BIRTHDAY GIRL?
READY?
JANE!
JANE...
THERE'S SOMEBODY
I WANT YOU TO MEET.
THIS IS LUIS.
HELLO.
HELLO.
GO ON. DANCE.
DANCE.
WHAT'S UP, LUIS?
I LOVE HER.
WHO'S THAT?
I LOVE CARMEN.
I'VE LOVED HER SINCE
I WAS A LITTLE BOY.
SHE ONLY SEES ME AS A FRIEND.
MAYBE YOU CAN
TALK TO HER FOR ME.
MERCEDES SAYS
YOU'RE HER BEST FRIEND.
YOU COULD TELL HER I LOVE HER
AND I'LL BE GOOD TO HER.
YOU KNOW, LUIS, UH...
MAYBE THESE FEELINGS
YOU HAVE FOR CARMEN...
MAYBE THEY'RE NOT
THE SAME FOR HER.
HI.
HI.
HI.
MIND IF I CUT IN?
OKAY.
ISN'T THIS A LITTLE RISKY?
AH, I DIDN'T TELL YOU
THAT IN THE LATINO CULTURE,
IT'S OKAY IF TWO GIRLS
DANCE WITH EACH OTHER.
IT'S NOT EXACTLY QUEER.
YOU LEFT THAT PART OUT.
YES, I DID.
I LOVE YOUR HAIR.
YOU OWE ME.
I KNOW. THANK YOU.
YOU'RE WELCOME.
THANK YOU SO MUCH, ANGUS.
I HOPE YOU HAD A GOOD TIME.
I, UH...
I RAN INTO AN EX OF MINE.
THAT MEANS THREE
OF MY EX-GIRLFRIENDS
ARE NOW LESBIANS.
WOW.
THAT'S QUITE A RECORD.
WHAT CAN I SAY?
I'M ATTRACTED TO WOMEN
WHO LIKE TO GO DOWN
ON OTHER WOMEN.
UH, WE WANT TO
ASK YOU SOMETHING.
OKAY.
UM, TINA AND I WERE THINKING
ABOUT HIRING A
NANNY FOR ANGELICA,
JUST PART-TIME.
AND WE KNOW
THAT YOU WERE LOOKING
FOR PART-TIME WORK.
AND WE JUST THINK
IT WOULD BE GREAT FOR ANGELICA
TO HAVE A MAN IN HER LIFE.
YOU KNOW, I MEAN, SOMEBODY
THAT SHE'S CLOSE TO.
A SCRATCHY FACE.
A FAMILIAR VOICE.
I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU MEAN.
I'D BE HONORED.
GREAT. GREAT.
THANKS, YOU GUYS.
THAT WAS AN AWESOME BIRTHDAY.
YOU'RE WELCOME.
AND I DON'T THINK I
THOUGHT OF DANA
FOR, LIKE, 47
MINUTES... KIND OF.
THAT'S GOOD, RIGHT?
THAT'S REALLY GOOD.
OH, HOW WAS IT TODAY, BABY?
YOU'RE REALLY TIGHT.
I KNOW. GEORGE
IS KICKING MY BUTT.
IT'S WEIRD.
IT'S LIKE HE WANTS ME
TO WIN THIS TOURNAMENT
MORE THAN I DO.
HEY, WHAT...
WHAT DID DR. GRUBMAN SAY?
SHIT. FORGOT.
DANA, DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA
HOW HARD IT WAS FOR ME TO
GET YOU THAT APPOINTMENT?
I HAD TO PROMISE TO
CATER A PRIVATE DINNER
FOR HIM AND HIS WIFE
JUST TO GET YOU IN
THERE BEFORE JUNE.
OH, NO.
AND YOU KNOW THAT AT 30
YOU SHOULD GO AND GET AN EXAM
ONCE A YEAR.
YOU KNOW THAT.
I KNOW. IT'S JUST...
I'M SORRY. I JUST...
I'VE NEVER BEEN TO
A MALE GYNO BEFORE.
I THINK IT'S WEIRD,
AND I JUST DON'T WANT SOME
DUDE LOOKING UP MY WOODLE.
LOOKING UP YOUR WOODLE?
WELL, THEN WHY DON'T YOU
JUST GO TO A LADY DOCTOR?
OKAY.
BUT JUST GO, OKAY?
YES.
I THINK BETTE AND TINA
HAVE A LADY DOCTOR.
I'LL CALL HER TOMORROW, OKAY?
OKAY.
HMM. WHAT IS THIS?
WHAT'S BEAR NIGHT?
THIS'LL BE FUN.
COME ON.
♪ I KNOW THAT YOU CAME
HERE TO BREAK MY HEART ♪
♪ ARE YOU REALLY THAT BLIND? ♪
WOW. THIS IS GREAT.
♪ WHO'S MAKING WHO CRY? ♪
♪ WHO'S SAYING GOODBYE? ♪
♪ WHO'S DRIVING YOU CRAZY
WITH A LOVE THAT WON'T DIE? ♪
♪ WHO'S LEAVING WHO NOW? ♪
♪ WHO'S BRINGING WHO DOWN? ♪
♪ I'M MOVING YOUR BABY ♪
♪ WHILE YOU'RE STILL
HANGING AROUND ♪
♪ HONEY, YOU CAN'T DENY ♪
♪ WHO'S MAKING WHO CRY ♪
OKAY, EVERY SINGLE
PERSON IN MY FAMILY
ADORES YOU.
MY MOTHER, SHE
ABSOLUTELY LOVES YOU.
I LOVE THEM, TOO.
MM. YOU DO?
MM-HMM.
BUT I WONDER HOW
MUCH THEY'D LOVE ME
IF THEY KNEW
I WAS FUCKING THEIR DAUGHTER.
OOH.
WELL, I WONDER
WHO'S GOING TO BE
DOING THE FUCKING
TONIGHT,
BECAUSE YOU LOOKED PRETTY GIRLY
IN THAT DRESS YOU HAD ON.
WELL...
YOU LOOK A LITTLE
GIRLY YOURSELF.
OH...
♪ STROLLIN' IN THE PARK ♪
♪ WATCHIN' WINTER
TURN TO SPRING ♪
♪ WALKIN' IN THE DARK ♪
♪ WATCHIN' LOVERS
DO THEIR THING ♪
♪ THAT'S THE TIME ♪
♪ I FEEL LIKE MAKIN'
LOVE TO YOU ♪
♪ THAT'S THE TIME... ♪
NO...
NO, NO, NO, DON'T ANSWER
IT. DON'T ANSWER IT.
NO, NO, NO, IT'S LATE.
WHAT IF IT'S AN EMERGENCY?
NO, NO, NO.
HELLO?
HI, JENNY.
UH...
YEAH. ARE YOU... ARE YOU OKAY?
YEAH, I'M FINE.
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. DON'T WORRY.
YEAH, WE'RE JUST...
WE'RE JUST TAKING OUR TIME.
WE'RE GOING TO BE
THERE IN A COUPLE OF DAYS.
UH-HUH.
OH, MY FRIEND MOIRA
DECIDED TO TAKE
HER PICKUP TRUCK,
AND WE'RE DRIVING
ACROSS THE COUNTRY NOW.
WHAT?
MY GIRLFRIEND?
HANG ON.
EXCUSE ME. MOIRA.
ARE YOU MY GIRLFRIEND?
WE DON'T KNOW.
"IT'S NOT DESIRE
THAT'S THE PROBLEM,"
ONE OF MY TEACHERS USED TO SAY.
"IT'S THAT YOUR
DESIRES ARE TOO SMALL."
THIS SHIFT IN CONSCIOUSNESS
IS WHAT LINKS THE WORLDS OF
ART, THERAPY, AND MEDITATION.
JAMES JOYCE DESCRIBED
THE MENTAL POSTURE
REQUIRED TO
APPRECIATE A WORK OF ART
AS "BEHOLDING."
"IF YOU PULL IT TOO CLOSE,
"IT BECOMES PORNOGRAPHY,
"AND IF YOU DISTANCE YOURSELF,
IT BECOMES CRITICISM."
♪ MY STUBBORN SKIN
IS WEARING THIN ♪
♪ I BARED MY SOUL
YOU WALTZED RIGHT IN ♪
♪ I GAVE YOU EVERYTHING ♪
♪ AND YOU JUST MADE
ME FEEL SO VERY ♪
♪ NAKED ♪
♪ AND I DON'T REMEMBER ♪
♪ I SPILLED MY GUTS
ON YOUR BEST SHOES ♪
♪ YOU KEEP IT IN
I LET IT LOOSE ♪
♪ IT'S ONLY LOVE ♪
♪ THAT MAKES ME FEEL LIKE
GETTING SO COMPLETELY ♪
♪ NAKED ♪
♪ AND I DON'T REMEMBER ♪
♪ HOW I LET MYSELF
BECOME SO UNRAVELED ♪
♪ I'M NAKED ♪
♪ PRETTY AS A HEARTACHE ♪
♪ WAITING FOR MY SECOND SKIN ♪
♪ TO SETTLE IN ♪
ANGUS...
WOULD YOU BE INTERESTED
IN PLAYING FOR THE KIDS
AT ANGELICA'S
SIX-MONTH CELEBRATION?
THANKS. I... I COULD
REALLY USE THE CASH.
FEEL A LITTLE
STRESSED OUT TODAY.
WE'RE ABOUT TO HAVE A HOME VISIT
FROM AN ADOPTION SOCIAL WORKER.
WHAT ABOUT MEN? MEN?
YOU DO KNOW THAT
WE'RE LESBIANS, RIGHT?
DANA, WHO TOLD ME SHE NEEDED...
SHE NEEDED CLOSURE.
CLOSURE WITH LARA.
YOU HAVE A LUMP.
WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT?
I'M GOING TO MEET
CARMEN'S MOTHER.
MM-HMM. AND?
I'M GOING TO ACT STRAIGHT.
HOW PRETTY.
AH. THERE.
WANT TO COME TO L.A. WITH ME?
YEAH.
ARE YOU THINKING
ABOUT HAVING SEX
WITH ME RIGHT NOW?
IT'S CROSSED MY MIND.
WHO DID THAT TO YOU?
I DID IT TO MYSELF.
LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE
IS SWIMMING UP THE WRONG STREAM
TONIGHT, SUGAR.
I'M...
I'M LOOKING FOR SEX.
WELL, YOU'RE IN THE
WRONG PLACE, SWEETIE.
TRY THE SAFEWAY IN THE MARINA.
IT'S CRAWLING WITH
STRAIGHT, HOT MEN.
I'M LOOKING FOR GIRLS.
JUST A LITTLE
FURTHER DOWN, HONEY.
USUALLY AROUND THAT CORNER.
THANKS.
YOU'RE SWEET.
I'M LOOKING FOR SEX...
SEX...
I'M LOOKING FOR... GIRLS...
I'M LOOKING FOR GIRLS...
FUCK ME SO I FORGET WHO I AM.
IT'S TOO LATE TO STOP ME.
JESUS...
OH, JESUS.
♪ GIRLS IN TIGHT DRESSES
WHO DRAG WITH MUSTACHES ♪
♪ CHICKS DRIVING FAST
INGENUES WITH LONG LASHES ♪
♪ WOMEN WHO LONG, LOVE,
LUST WOMEN WHO GIVE ♪
♪ THIS IS THE WAY IT'S
THE WAY THAT WE LIVE ♪
♪ TALKING, LAUGHING
LOVING, BREATHING ♪
♪ FIGHTING, FUCKING
CRYING, DRINKING ♪
♪ WRITING, WINNING
LOSING, CHEATING ♪
♪ KISSING, THINKING, DREAMING ♪
♪ THIS IS THE WAY... ♪
♪ IT'S THE WAY THAT WE LIVE ♪
♪ IT'S THE WAY THAT WE LIVE ♪
♪ AND LOVE ♪
21.21.
I JUST WON.
HOW CAN I COUNT ROADKILL
WHEN I'M DRIVING THE WHOLE TIME?
I WON FAIR AND SQUARE,
SO AS THE WINNER, YOU
HAVE TO GIVE ME A PRESENT.
PLEASE.
ALL RIGHT.
OPEN THE GLOVE.
OH, MY GOD...
IT'S IN THAT BOX.
WAIT, WHAT ARE YOU
DOING WITH A GUN?
WHY DO YOU HAVE
A GUN IN YOUR CAR?
IT'S JUST A TASER.
IT'S LIKE THE COPS USE.
IT JUST SHOCKS PEOPLE.
I KNOW, BUT WHAT ARE YOU...
WHAT ARE YOU
GOING TO DO WITH IT?
IT'S JUST IN CASE.
YOU DECIDE TO ROB A 7-11?
LOOK, I'VE NEVER HAD TO USE IT.
IT'S JUST THAT...
I GET A LOT OF SHIT FROM PEOPLE,
AND I'M GOING TO
TAKE CARE OF MYSELF.
JUST GOING TO PUT THIS AWAY.
NOW, OPEN THE BOX
AND GET YOUR PRIZE ALREADY.
YES, MA'AM.
HOLY SHIT.
BUT BE CAREFUL.
IT'S ALL I GOT.
YOU KNOW...
YOU KNOW WHAT?
MAYBE WE SHOULD WAIT TILL WE GET
A LITTLE CLOSER TO L.A.
BEFORE WE DO SOME.
OKAY?
OKAY, UM...
DID YOU SPEAK
WITH THE CROUP... THE CROUP...
THE CROUPIER?
YEAH.
YEAH, OF COURSE I DID, KIT.
I SPOKE WITH EVERYBODY.
MM.
THE VENDORS,
ABSOLUT,
ELVIS AND ANN ARE DOING
A SOUND CHECK AT 5:00...
WELL, YOU KNOW THAT CARMEN IS...
YEAH, CARMEN'S DJing,
AND SHE'S BRINGING HER OWN SET,
AND ALSO, SHE'S GOING TO BE HERE
TO DO PLAYBACK AT
THE SOUND CHECK.
OKAY, WELL,
I GUESS YOU'RE JUST
MR. BILLIE-ON-THE-SPOT,
HMM?
SPIT-SPOT. THAT'S ME.
I'M HERE
TO LICK YOUR YOUNG 'UNS
INTO SHAPE.
I'M YOUR BOY, KIT...
AND FRANKLY,
I'M MUCH MORE QUALIFIED
TO RUN THIS PLACE
THAN YOU ARE.
JOKING.
BUT I GUARANTEE...
THAT AFTER TONIGHT,
YOU'RE GOING TO WANT
ME TO RUN THIS JOINT.
MM-HMM.
WE'LL SEE, MR. MARY P.
WELL, I THINK THE REASON
I WAS WITH LISA THE LESBIAN MAN
IS BECAUSE HE WASN'T
DANGEROUS FOR ME.
YOU KNOW, I JUST...
I KNEW I WOULDN'T
GET ADDICTED TO A GUY.
I ACTUALLY REMEMBER
HAVING THIS CONVERSATION
WITH MY FRIEND, TINA,
THAT, YOU KNOW, I THINK
GUYS ARE KIND OF EASY.
SORRY.
AND I WAS LOOKING
THROUGH THIS PAMPHLET HERE
ABOUT ALL THE DIFFERENT
KINDS OF LOVE ADDICTS,
AND I'M PRETTY SURE I'M A...
O.L.A.
OH, ME TOO.
YEAH, OBSESSIVE LOVE.
IT'S THE BEST.
I MEAN, WORST.
UH...
THERE'S NOTHING WORSE
THAN WHEN YOU CAN'T
LET GO OF SOMEONE
WHO'S COMPLETELY OVER YOU,
AND DISTANT, ABUSIVE,
CONTROLLING, DICTATORIAL...
EGOCENTRIC, UNLOVING,
SELFISH, UNABLE TO COMMIT...
YEAH, AND IT'S MY BIRTHDAY
THIS WEEK, AND I WAS...
HEY.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, ALICE.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY. HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
THANK YOU.
YEAH, I JUST...
YOU KNOW, IT'D BE GREAT IF
DANA WOULD JUST COME BY
AND, YOU KNOW, GIVE
ME A LITTLE PREZZIE,
NOTHING BIG...
YOU KNOW, MAYBE KISS
MY EYELIDS OR SOMETHING...
GET A GRIP GET A GRIP.
LET ALICE SHARE, PLEASE.
THANKS.
YEAH, I MEAN, I THINK...
I THINK YOU GUYS WOULD
BE OBSESSING, TOO,
BECAUSE OUR SEX...
WAS MINDBLOWINGLY...
UNFUCKINGLY UNBELIEVABLE,
AND IT JUST KIND OF, YOU KNOW...
IT MAKES YOU REALIZE
THAT THIS PERSON
COULD BE THE ONE
GREAT, TRUE LOVE
OF YOUR LIFE.
YOU KNOW?
BUT SHE'LL BE BACK.
SHE WILL BE BACK.
BECAUSE OUR LOVE...
OUR LOVE WAS TOO INTENSE, SO...
MOMMY LOVES YOU, TOO, DARLING.
YEAH, I'LL SEE YOU NEXT WEEK.
YOU HAVE A WONDERFUL
TIME AT THE BALLET.
I WISH I WAS COMING.
OKAY, SPEAK TO YOU TOMORROW.
BIG KISS. BYE.
I WONDER IF MOST LITTLE BOYS
GET THAT EXCITED
ABOUT THE BALLET?
HOW WAS IT?
IT SUCKED.
OH...
I HAVE A LITTLE
SURPRISE FOR YOU.
YOU DO? MM-HMM.
OH, GOD. I'M SO SORRY.
I'M SUCH A GROSS
BISEXUAL LOVE ADDICT
RIGHT NOW.
HI. I'M JANICE.
I KNOW YOU'RE
HAVING A HARD TIME,
AND I'M HERE TO
TAKE CARE OF YOU.
WE'RE AN EXCLUSIVELY
LESBIAN SERVICE.
DID YOU HIRE ME A HOOKER?
ALICE, IT'S A LESBIAN
CLEANING SERVICE.
"LEZ CLEAN UP."
SHE'S GOING TO SORT OUT
YOUR ENTIRE APARTMENT.
OH, MY GOD.
I LOVE YOU.
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
MY APARTMENT'S
SO DIRTY RIGHT NOW,
EVER SINCE, YOU KNOW...
I'M A BIG FAN OF THE CHART,
AND I'M SO SORRY ABOUT DANA.
SO SORRY.
OH. OKAY.
OH.
THANK YOU. THANKS.
OKAY, GREAT.
ALL RIGHT.
YOU'RE SO FUCKING BEAUTIFUL...
AND I'M GOING TO MAKE YOU
COME WHILE YOU'RE DRIVING, MISS.
MY GIRLFRIEND USED
TO GIVE ME HEAD
WHILE WE DROVE TO SCHOOL.
HEY, LADY...
I'M NOT YOUR EX,
AND I'M NOT YOUR GIRLFRIEND.
GOT IT?
RIGHT.
OH, FUCK.
WHAT?
SHIT.
WE RAN OUT OF GAS.
OH, NO.
DON'T STOP, JENNY.
KEEP GOING.
DON'T BLUE-BALL ME.
UM...
ALICE, DO YOU WANT
ME TO CLEAN UP
AROUND THIS...
AROUND THIS...
AROUND DANA?
ALICE, WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO
WITH THIS DANA THING?
ALICE IS IN THE LOO.
WHAT DANA THING?
JESUS BLOODY CHRIST.
ALICE!
WHAT?
WHAT THE FUCK, HELENA?
HAVE YOU COMPLETELY
LOST YOUR MIND?
YEAH, THAT'S...
THAT'S NO BIGGIE.
IT'S A FUCKING SHRINE, ALICE...
A BORDERING-ON-PSYCHOTIC,
SERIAL-KILLER-OBSESSIVE-TYPE
SHRINE.
DISMANTLE IT.
OH, GOD. NO, PLEASE.
LET IT LIVE. NO.
OKAY, OKAY, JUST... LET
ME KEEP THIS. PLEASE?
JUST LET ME KEEP THIS.
THIS WAS REALLY HARD TO GET.
I HAD TO GET IT IN THE
MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT.
YOU CAN TAKE THE SHRINE.
YOU CAN TAKE THE SHRINE.
JUST NOT THIS.
GET A BOX.
THERE'S A BOX.
NOT THAT BOX.
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED
OF YOURSELF, ALICE.
IT'S TIME TO START
GETTING OVER DANA.
NOW...
HERE'S WHAT WE'RE GOING TO DO.
I'VE TRIED. I'VE
BEEN TO MEETINGS...
JUST LISTEN.
OKAY?
I DIDN'T HAVE A CHANCE
TO WASH EVERYTHING, SO...
GREAT.
I HAVE TO PEE.
DON'T LOOK.
HEY.
OH, MY GOD.
HOW DO YOU... HOW
DO YOU DO THAT?
I ALWAYS HAVE, EVEN
WHEN I WAS LITTLE.
WHEN MY DAD CAUGHT
ME, HE POPPED ME ONE.
AH!
HELLO.
HELLO. PLEASE STOP.
SAVED.
WELL, HEY THERE, FELLA.
OH, SHE'S NOT A...
LOOKS LIKE YOU NEED SOME HELP.
YEAH, WE RAN OUT OF GAS.
NOT A PROBLEM.
I'LL SIPHON SOME OUT OF THE R.V.
MY NAME'S HAL, BY THE WAY.
HI.
HI. I'M JENNY. NICE TO MEET YOU.
THAT'S MY WIFE, MARTHA.
HELLO, MARTHA.
WE GOT SOME FRIED CHICKEN
IN THE CAMPER,
IF YOU AND YOUR HUSBAND
ARE HUNGRY.
YES, I WOULD LOVE
SOME FRIED CHICKEN.
THANK YOU.
WHAT DID YOU SAY
YOUR NAME WAS, SON?
UH, IT'S MAX.
THANK YOU, BABY.
YOU'RE WELCOME.
MM.
YOU TWO ARE SO HOT TOGETHER.
AT LEAST SOMEONE'S GETTING
A LITTLE SOMETHIN'-SOMETHIN'.
SO, UH...
WHAT'S UP WITH THE
SLOT MACHINE, KIT?
YEAH, WELL, YOU
KNOW BILLIE BLAIKIE.
HE DOESN'T DO ANYTHING SMALL.
SO YOU GUYS ARE COMING, RIGHT?
IT WON'T BE VEGAS WITHOUT YOU.
WAIT A MINUTE.
ARE YOU TALKING
ABOUT THE BILLIE BLAIKIE?
BILLIE BLAIKIE?
DUDE, HE IS, LIKE, THE
BEST PARTY PROMOTER
IN TOWN.
KIT WAS THINKING
ABOUT HIRING HIM
AS HER NEW MANAGER.
OH, MY GOSH.
CONGRATULATIONS, LADY.
YEAH, IT'S GREAT IF HE
CAN KEEP IT IN HIS PANTS
LONG ENOUGH TO
CLOSE OUT THE BAR.
OH, I'M SORRY.
BEFORE WE FORGET...
BUT WE CAN'T MAKE IT
TO YOUR BABY BIRTHDAY
PARTY TOMORROW,
BECAUSE WE HAVE A QUINCEAN...
OH, THAT'S RIGHT,
THE QUINCEANERA.
YEAH, THE QUINCEANERA.
DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.
IT'S JUST REALLY AN EXCUSE
TO HAVE A BABY PLAY GROUP,
AND HALF BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION.
I DON'T GET IT. WHAT'S A...
WHAT'S A QUINCE...
A QUINCEANERA.
QUINCEANERA.
THEY'RE PLANNING A SURPRISE
BIRTHDAY PARTY FOR ME.
BIG BIRTHDAY PARTY TO
CELEBRATE A GIRL TURNING 15,
AND IT'S MY COUSIN'S
BIRTHDAY, SO...
I ALMOST THOUGHT THEY FORGOT.
OKAY, SHH. JUST WALK UP.
SO IT'S KIND OF
LIKE A BAT MITZVAH.
WITH TAMALES.
HI. HEY.
WHAT ARE YOU GUYS TALKING ABOUT?
WE'RE HAVING A PARTY FOR
ANGELICA'S SIXTH MONTH.
DO YOU WANT TO COME?
I WOULD LOVE TO COME
TO THAT SIX-MONTH-OLD
BIRTHDAY PARTY.
I WOULD... CAN I...
I'D LOVE TO BRING HELENA.
ALICE...
HELENA.
I THINK SHE SHOULD BE THERE.
I THINK IT'S TIME, BETTE.
WELL, THEY ARE GOOD FRIENDS.
YEAH, THEY'RE
ALWAYS HANGING OUT.
WELL, LISTEN, HELENA,
IF YOU REALLY DON'T
HAVE ANYTHING ELSE TO DO,
THEN THAT WOULD BE FINE
IF YOU CAME TO THE PARTY.
THANK YOU.
THAT'S... REALLY SWEET OF YOU,
BUT YOU KNOW,
YOU REALLY DON'T HAVE... TO...
SHE DOES.
WHAT THE HELL ARE
YOU DOING IN HERE, BOY?
CAN'T YOU READ?
THIS IS THE LADIES' ROOM.
GET THE FUCK OUT.
I'M A GIRL.
HEY.
HEY.
I GOT YOU SOME LUNCH.
HEY, LET'S TAKE OFF, OKAY?
WHY?
CAN WE EAT FIRST?
YOU SEE THAT FREAK THERE?
IT WAS JUST IN THE
GIRLS' BATHROOM.
MUST BE A FAGGOT.
FAGGOT.
FAGGOT!
HEY, FAGGOT!
WHAT DID YOU SAY?
JUST LET IT GO, JENNY.
JOHNNY, YOU'RE CRAZY!
I CALLED YOU A FAGGOT.
OH, MY GOD. I CAN'T BELIEVE IT.
LOOK, MAN, WE DON'T
WANT ANY TROUBLE, OKAY?
NO, I DON'T WANT
ANY TROUBLE EITHER.
JUST WANT TO GET OUT AND TALK?
YOU WANT TO HAVE A LITTLE TALK?
LOOK, WE'RE OUT
OF HERE, ALL RIGHT?
DUDE, LEAVE US ALONE.
FUCK YOU, FAGGOT.
GET OUT OF THE TRUCK! SHIT.
NO... NO!
LET HER GO.
SHUT UP, YOU BITCH FREAK.
IS THIS YOUR FUCKING BOYFRIEND?
JENNY, GET BACK...
DOES HE FUCK YOU LIKE A MAN?
WHOO!
GET BACK IN THE TRUCK, JENNY.
YEAH, JENNY, GET
BACK IN THE TRUCK,
AND I'LL SHOW YOU HOW
A REAL MAN CAN FUCK.
WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?
GET BACK IN THE FUCKING TRUCK,
AND I'LL SHOW YOU HOW
A REAL MAN CAN FUCK...
YEAH?
JESUS CHRIST.
FUCKER.
WELL, THERE'S YOUR FAGGOT BACK.
COME ON, JENNY.
WHY DON'T YOU GIVE ME A CALL
WHEN YOU'RE READY
FOR A REAL MAN,
AND WE CAN HAVE SOME FUN THEN.
SURE, DUDE. NO PROBLEM.
DON'T TOUCH HIM!
HEY.
WE'RE NOT FAGGOTS.
WE'RE DYKES, YOU ASSHOLE.
FUCK YOU!
YOU'RE GOING TO
FUCKING DIE, BITCH!
YOU DISGUSTING BITCH!
FUCK YOU!
I HOPE HE'S ALL RIGHT.
FUCK HIM.
IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN A REAL GUN.
GIRLS, BOYS, PUNKS, FREAKS,
BUTCHES, FEMMES, KINGS, QUEENS,
TRANNIES, TRAINEES,
LADIES...
AND GENTLEMEN...
I AM BILLIE BLAIKIE, YOUR
HOST FOR THIS EVENING,
AND WELCOME TO THE PLANET'S
FIRST ANNUAL CASINO NIGHT...
"VULVA LAS VEGAS"!
AND LET'S HEAR IT
FOR OUR CUTE LITTLE DJ, CARMEN!
ANYWAY, THE MONEY YOU'RE
GOING TO RAISE TONIGHT
WILL GO TO AIDS
PROJECT LOS ANGELES.
LET'S HEAR IT FOR
AIDS PROJECT. YES, YES.
THAT'S A MUCH, MUCH BETTER CAUSE
THAN THE PORN WEBSITES
YOU NORMALLY
SPEND YOUR MONEY ON,
YOU DIRTY, DIRTY GIRL.
IN A FEW MOMENTS,
ALL BETS WILL BE OFF,
BECAUSE THE BIG
SHOW IS ABOUT TO START,
SO GET YOUR LAST FEW
GAMES IN, MY DARLINGS.
YOU DIRTY, DIRTY, DIRTY GIRL.
AND AS FOR ME...
I'M OFF TO A LITTLE LEAGUE GAME.
OH, COME ON.
DISGRUNTLED WOMEN... COME ON.
LOOSEN UP, LESBIANS.
I KNOW YOU DON'T WANT TO TALK
ABOUT ALL THAT COCK AND
CONDOM STUFF, DO YOU?
NO.
YOU WANT TO...
YOU WANT TO
CELEBRATE THE SNATCH!
YOU WANT TO VENERATE THE VAGINA!
YOU WANT TO PRAISE THE PUSSY!
WELL, REST ASSURED,
WE ALL WANT TO
PRAISE THE PUSSY HERE.
OKAY, KEEP DRINKING, EVERYBODY,
BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT
HAPPENS WHEN YOU KEEP DRINKING...
EVERYONE LOOKS CUTER.
AND P.S., HERE'S THE MONEY.
OH, DO YOU THINK THIS IS IT?
YEAH.
LOOKS LIKE A TYPICAL
SMALL-TOWN GAY BAR.
COME ON. LET'S GET INSIDE.
NO WHAMMIES.
WOW.
NICE. NICE JOB.
IT'S JUST AN IDEA...
BUT TRY 32 RED.
NO, NO, THOSE ARE
YOUR CHIPS. REALLY.
SHANE, YOU CAN'T.
JUST TAKE THEM AND TRY.
BET THE LOT, BETTE.
YOU LOOK LUCKY TONIGHT.
SHE IS LUCKY. SHE'S MY SISTER.
COME ON, GIRL.
COME ON. PUT IT DOWN.
COME ON, GIRL.
ALL RIGHT. HERE WE GO.
ALL RIGHT. LOAD IT UP.
32 RED.
OH, MY GOD. I ACTUALLY WON.
THANK YOU.
THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.
NO, NO, NO, THIS IS
YOUR PERCENTAGE.
NO, I WANT YOU TO HAVE IT.
DENTAL DAMS, LADIES. SAFE.
KEEP IT SAFE. KEEP IT SAFE.
PLACE YOUR BETS, PLEASE.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
PLACE YOUR BETS.
THANKS.
HEY.
I COULD USE A FEW OF
THOSE OVER HERE, HUH?
WHO'S MY TIGER?
♪ MILES AWAY... ♪
AND TWO MORE
TEQUILA HERE, LADIES.
THANK YOU.
I THINK I KNOW WHO'LL BE
TAKING WHO HOME TONIGHT.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
I WANT TO ROCK!
I WANT TO ROCK!
ROCK ME!
LET'S GO LOOK AROUND.
♪ IT HANGS IN MY HAIR AND
THE HEMS OF MY CLOTHES ♪
♪ I THOUGHT IN THE MADNESS
MY ARMS COULD NOT HOLD ♪
♪ I CAN'T TELL YOU WHY
'CAUSE I LONG TO BE ♪
♪ FORGIVEN ♪
♪ SO FAR AWAY ♪
HEY. HEY.
DO YOU WANT TO DANCE?
COME ON.
TWO MORE TEQUILAS?
TEQUILA? SURE THING.
THANK YOU.
♪ PORCH LIGHT
BURNS SO FAR AWAY ♪
♪ MILES AWAY ♪
THANKS.
THANK YOU.
EXCUSE ME.
HI. CAN WE GO?
NOW?
YEAH, IF... WHAT'S YOUR NAME?
KATRINA.
YEAH, IF, KATRINA,
YOU DON'T MIND.
I'M SORRY.
I DIDN'T KNOW YOU
TWO WERE TOGETHER.
WELL, YOU DO NOW. WE'RE NOT.
BYE.
♪ FORGIVEN... ♪
SO HAVE YOU SEEN DAVID YET?
IS HE HERE?
UH, NO, I HAVEN'T SEEN HIM.
I HAVEN'T SEEN HIM AT ALL.
SO, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF BILLIE?
WELL, THE PLACE IS PACKED.
WHAT?
YOU DON'T LIKE HIM?
"I'M ON MY WAY TO A
LITTLE LEAGUE GAME"?
OH, HE WAS JUST PLAYING.
IT WAS A JOKE.
IT'S NOT EVEN REMOTELY FUNNY.
GUYS AND DOLLS,
I GIVE YOU ELVIS, THE KING,
AND MISS KITTEN
WITH A WHIP HERSELF,
ANN-MARGRET!
THANKS, BILLIE, YOU NUT.
OH, HEY THERE, KIDS.
TWIST, TWIST.
LOOK AT THIS PLACE, ELVIS.
WHAT A BLOWOUT!
♪ SHE LOVES ME ♪
♪ THE LADY LOVES
ME AND IT SHOWS ♪
♪ IN SPITE OF THE WAY ♪
♪ SHE TURNS UP HER NOSE ♪
♪ I'M HER IDEAL HER
HEART'S DESIRE ♪
♪ UNDER THAT ICE ♪
♪ SHE'S BURNING LIKE FIRE ♪
♪ SHE'D LIKE TO
CUDDLE UP WITH ME ♪
♪ SHE'S PLAYING HARD TO GET ♪
♪ THE LADY LOVES ME ♪
♪ BUT SHE DOESN'T KNOW IT YET ♪
♪ THE GENTLEMAN
HAS SAVOIR FAIRE ♪
♪ AS MUCH AS AN ELEPHANT ♪
♪ OR A BEAR ♪
♪ I'D LIKE TO TAKE
HIM FOR A SPIN... ♪
WHOA, WHAT'S GOING ON IN HERE?
HEY. DAVID.
THIS LOOKS LIKE A NIGHTMARE.
OH, THIS IS ANOTHER
WILD NIGHT AT THE PLANET.
♪ ...SOGGY CIGARETTE ♪
♪ THE LADY LOVES HIM ♪
♪ BUT HE DOESN'T KNOW IT YET ♪
SHE SAID YOU
WANTED TO TALK TO ME.
YEAH. YEAH, I DO.
HEY, DAVID!
SO, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
WELL, I THINK THAT THEY'RE...
WELL, THEY'RE FREAKS,
AND THIS KIND OF
NONSENSE ATTRACTS FREAKS
TO YOUR ONCE
RESPECTABLE ESTABLISHMENT.
OOH.
YOU KNOW WHAT?
FOR A MINUTE,
I WAS SERIOUSLY CONSIDERING
SHAGGING YOU, MR. IZOD,
BUT YOU'RE NOT A
VERY NICE FELLOW,
ARE YOU?
BILLIE, THIS IS DAVID WATERS.
THIS IS KIT'S SON.
ENCHANTE, THEN, DARK STAR.
AND DAVID,
THIS IS BILLIE BLAIKIE,
MY NEW MANAGER.
OH!
AND YOU WON'T
REGRET IT, MY DARLING.
SEE YOU LATER.
YOUR NEW MANAGER?
DAVID, DON'T YOU GO
PASSING JUDGMENT ON HIM.
THAT MAN HAS DONE MORE
FOR THIS COMMUNITY THAN...
KIT, KIT,
DAVID HAS A RIGHT
TO HIS OPINION.
I KNOW HE DOES,
BUT YOU KNOW,
LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING...
IT GIVES ME GREAT JOY TO
SEE THESE PEOPLE IN HERE
LAUGHING, AND PARTYING,
AND LIVING THE LIFE THEY LOVE,
AND LOVING THE LIFE THEY LIVE,
AND I CAN SEE
THAT YOU JUST CAN'T GET
DOWN WITH THAT, CAN YOU?
NO, MOM, I CAN'T
GET DOWN WITH THAT.
JUST...
GIVE ME THAT.
I'LL SEE YOU BOTH LATER.
KIT, I REALLY NEED HIM
TO BE THERE TOMORROW
WHEN ROBERTA COLLIE SHOWS UP.
I KNOW. I KNOW.
OKAY?
I'LL TALK TO HIM.
I JUST NEED TO
SLEEP IT OFF, OKAY?
HE'S SUCH AN
ARROGANT LITTLE PRICK.
♪ I SAID THE LADY LOVES ME ♪
♪ THE GENTLEMAN'S ALL... WET ♪
ARE YOU GOING TO
TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT,
OR ARE YOU JUST
GOING TO SIT THERE
ACTING ALL WEIRD AND SILENT?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
WHAT DO I WANT?
I MEAN, YOU SAY
YOU DON'T WANT TO
BE MY GIRLFRIEND,
AND THEN YOU GOT ALL WEIRD
AND JEALOUS GIRLFRIEND ON ME
BACK THERE.
I KNOW.
THAT WAS...
THAT WAS FUCKED UP.
DO YOU WANT TO BE
MY OUTLAW GIRLFRIEND,
JENNY?
DO YOU WANT TO BE MY FRIEND?
DO YOU JUST WANT TO BE
MY FUCK BUDDY ON THE ROAD?
WHAT DO YOU WANT?
I WANT YOU TO GET
UP AGAINST THE WALL.
GO ON.
ALL RIGHT.
NOW UNBUTTON YOUR SHIRT.
OPEN.
WOW.
TELL ME YOU WANT ME TO FUCK YOU.
YOU NEVER LET ME FUCK YOU.
NO.
I CAN'T.
I'M SORRY.
I'M SORRY.
COME HERE.
COME ON.
TINA?
MM-HMM.
ARE YOU AWAKE?
MM-HMM.
I'M SCARED.
IT'S OKAY, BABY...
WHAT IF I CAN'T ADOPT HER?
WHAT IF I CAN'T FIND A
JOB THAT I REALLY LOVE?
WHAT IF WE LOSE THE HOUSE?
I JUST... I FEEL LIKE...
I FEEL LIKE I DON'T HAVE
ANY CONTROL OVER ANYTHING.
I MEAN, I DON'T KNOW
WHAT'S GOING ON WITH US.
I DON'T KNOW IF IT'S JUST
ALL THE CHANGES, AND...
TINA?
TINA?
HI, LITTLE FOXY BROWN.
YOU DO LOOK A LITTLE LIKE ME...
YOU SEE?
SHE'S NOT LISTENING
TO ANYTHING I SAY.
OH, I HEARD YOU.
I'M SUPPOSED TO
TAKE PROGESTERONE
TO HELP ME WITH THE CRAZIES,
BUT WHAT ARE YOU GONNA TAKE
TO HELP YOU WITH YOUR BIGOTRY?
KIT, I THOUGHT WE AGREED.
I'M SORRY.
YOU'RE RIGHT.
WE ARE GOING TO
PUT THIS ALL BEHIND US
SO WE CAN AGREE TO DISAGREE
SO DAVID WILL HELP US OUT TODAY.
HI, BABY.
OH...
OKAY, SO TELL ME WHY I'M HERE.
WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU LADIES?
UH, WELL...
DAVID...
DO YOU WANT TO HOLD
HER FOR A LITTLE WHILE?
GO TO YOUR UNCLE
DAVID FOR A LITTLE WHILE.
UM...
THERE'S A WOMAN COMING OVER
IN JUST A LITTLE WHILE,
AND WE WANTED HER TO SEE HOW
GREAT YOU ARE WITH ANGELICA.
YOU MIND IF I ASK WHY?
SHE'S OUR ADOPTION CASEWORKER,
AND SHE'S MAKING HER
SECOND HOME VISIT TODAY,
AND ONE OF HER BIG CONCERNS
WAS WHETHER OR NOT...
IS THAT HER ALREADY?
WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.
ONE OF HER...
BIG CONCERNS WAS WHETHER OR NOT
ANGELICA HAD AN
IMPORTANT MAN IN HER LIFE,
AND WE JUST THOUGHT
IT WOULD REASSURE HER
TO LET HER SEE
YOU WITH ANGELICA.
SO THAT SHE COULD SEE THAT
YOU'RE ANGELICA'S MAIN MAN.
YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?
HI, ROBERTA.
I SHOULD BE ALL RIGHT NOW.
OKAY.
LET US KNOW IF YOU NEED
ANY MORE HELP, MA'AM.
WE'RE JUST IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD.
THANK YOU. YOU'RE TOO KIND.
I'M SORRY. I CAN'T.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN, YOU CAN'T?
ROBERTA, YOU
REMEMBER KIT PORTER,
BETTE'S SISTER,
AND THIS IS HER SON,
DAVID, ANGELICA'S COUSIN.
I DON'T BELIEVE IN GAY ADOPTION.
I THINK THAT A
CHILD IS BEST RAISED
HAVING BOTH
A MOTHER AND A FATHER,
AND I THINK THAT SHE WILL SUFFER
LATER ON
IN THE ABSENCE
OF TRADITIONAL FAMILY VALUES,
SO I'M AFRAID
THAT IT WOULD BE
HYPOCRITICAL OF ME
TO STAND HERE AND
TO VOUCH FOR YOU...
ESPECIALLY IN FRONT OF
A GOVERNMENT OFFICIAL.
SORRY.
IT WAS NICE TO MEET YOU, MA'AM.
WELL...
I'M GLAD TO SEE
SOMEONE IN YOUR FAMILY
HAS PROPER RESPECT
FOR THE GOVERNMENT.
THIS IS CALLED THE
ULTIMATE PATRIOT ACT.
IT'S BY A GUERILLA GIRL.
I LOVE IT.
TINA HATES IT.
WHAT, SHE HATES THIS PIECE?
WELL, THAT'S GOOD.
WE WANT THE WORK
TO ELICIT STRONG REACTIONS.
NOT FROM MY LIFE PARTNER.
I WANT MY PARTNER TO SUPPORT ME.
WHAT, UNCONDITIONALLY?
I DON'T KNOW.
I MEAN, WHY SHOULDN'T I EXPECT
THE PERSON THAT I'M
CLOSEST TO IN THE WORLD
TO TRY TO SEE THINGS
FROM MY POINT OF VIEW
INSTEAD OF CHALLENGING ME
AND QUESTIONING MY CONVICTIONS
ALL THE TIME?
I GET ENOUGH OF THAT
FROM THE WORLD AT LARGE.
ARE YOU AND TINA OKAY?
I MEAN, I KNOW IT'S
HARD WITH A NEW BABY.
WE DON'T REALLY TALK ANYMORE.
WE JUST HAVE
ARGUMENTS ABOUT MONEY,
AND ARGUMENTS ABOUT BABYSITTERS,
AND ARGUMENTS ABOUT
BREAST-FEEDING SCHEDULES.
WE HAD THIS...
WE HAD THIS HIDEOUS MEETING
WITH THE ADOPTION SOCIAL WORKER
THIS MORNING.
I'M SORRY.
I'M SORRY, JULIA.
YOU REALLY DON'T
NEED THIS RIGHT NOW.
LOOK, I HAVE TWO OTHER
PIECES THAT I CAN SHOW YOU.
HAVE YOU TALKED TO TINA?
MAYBE IF THE TWO OF YOU
SAW SOMEONE TOGETHER...
WE'VE BEEN TO THERAPY.
WE'VE SEEN THREE
DIFFERENT THERAPISTS
IN THREE YEARS, SO...
BETTE...
HAVE YOU EVER HEARD
OF MARK EPSTEIN?
IS HE AN ARTIST?
HE'S GIVING A TALK TONIGHT.
HE'S A PSYCHIATRIST,
BUT HE'S ALSO
AN EMINENT BUDDHIST PHILOSOPHER
AND AUTHOR.
OH, RIGHT.
HE WROTE THOUGHTS
WITHOUT A THINKER.
I REMEMBER EVERYBODY
WAS READING THAT
WHEN I FIRST MOVED TO NEW YORK.
WELL, HE'S GOT A NEW BOOK.
IT'S CALLED OPEN TO DESIRE.
OPEN TO DESIRE?
I THOUGHT BUDDHISM WAS
ABOUT FREEDOM FROM DESIRE.
I THOUGHT DESIRE
WAS SUPPOSED TO BE
THE ROOT OF ALL
EVIL OR SOMETHING.
MARK'S GOT A LOT TO
SAY ON THE SUBJECT.
I THINK IT MIGHT
RESONATE FOR YOU.
SHANE?
SHANE, COME OUT.
COME ON OUT. LET ME SEE.
OH, MY GOD.
YOU LOOK LIKE YOU'RE FIVE.
I FEEL LIKE A PINATA.
YOU'RE TOO SMALL TO BE A PINATA,
BUT HOW ABOUT THE TOP
OF A TRANNY WEDDING CAKE?
YOU'RE NOT HELPING ME.
I'M SORRY. I'M SORRY, BABY.
THAT WASN'T FUNNY, WAS IT?
LET ME SEE.
WELL...
IT'S OKAY.
OH, COME HERE. COME HERE.
DOES THIS HELP YOU AT ALL?
NO.
NO?
MM-MM.
YO QUIERO LAMER TE...
HASTA QUE TE VENGAS
EN MI BOCA MIL VECES.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
MM...
"I'M GOING TO LICK YOU
"UNTIL YOU COME IN MY MOUTH
A THOUSAND TIMES."
OH...
WOW... WHAT ARE THESE?
OH.
WHAT ARE WE GOING
TO DO ABOUT THE SHOES?
WHAT?
YOU CAN'T WEAR THOSE SHOES.
YOU HAVE TO CHANGE THEM.
NO. YES.
STAY HERE.
I'M GOING TO GET YOU A
PAIR OF CHA-CHA HEELS.
HI.
HI.
HI THERE. WHO ARE YOU?
ROLAND.
ARE YOU THE CLOWN?
I'M THE BIRTHDAY GIRL, ROLAND.
AND YES, YES, I'M THE CLOWN.
MOMMY, MOMMY!
THE CLOWN'S HERE!
OH, MY GOD.
JANE, YOU LOOK TAN BONITA.
LOOK, EVERYBODY.
HOLA, EVERYONE.
HOLA!
THIS IS CARMEN'S FRIEND, JANE.
SHE'S WEARING MY DRESS.
WHERE IS MARISELA?
SHOULDN'T SHE BE HERE
GETTING READY
WITH THE REST OF US?
SHE'S PROBABLY OUTSIDE
SMOKING CIGARETTES,
LIKE YOU DID
FOR YOUR QUINCEANERA.
AY, CALLATE.
CARMEN...
HUH?
YOUR MAMA WAS IN
RICARDO LOPEZ'S CAR,
MAKING OUT WITH HIM,
UP UNTIL THE CHURCH WAS FILLED.
MAMITA.
YOU NEVER TOLD ME THAT STORY.
THAT'S BECAUSE IT
WASN'T TRUE, MIJA.
SI, ES LA VERDAD.
WAS CARMEN GOOD
DURING HER QUINCEAN...
QUINCEANERA?
YEAH, QUINCEANERA.
SHE WAS AN ANGEL, ALWAYS.
CARMEN WAS THE NUNS' FAVORITE.
ISN'T THAT TRUE, CARMENCITA?
OKAY. IT'S JANE'S TURN NOW.
COME ON, JANE.
OH, MOM, NO...
NO, I-I-I... UM...
SUCH A PRETTY FACE.
I'LL MAKE YOU LOOK BEAUTIFUL.
COME. COME.
IT'S OKAY. IT'S OKAY.
OOPS. YOU OKAY?
SIT.
JANE, YOUR HAIR
IS A LITTLE UNEVEN.
YOU WANT ME TO CUT IT STRAIGHT?
NO!
I MEAN, NO, UM... THANK YOU...
I THINK...
OKAY, OKAY.
IT'S GOOD. THANKS.
I HAVE ANOTHER IDEA.
GIRLS, UM...
I'M SORRY TO INTRUDE, BUT...
WE HAVE A BIT OF A DISASTER
ON OUR HANDS.
YEAH, THE FOOD IS DISGUSTING
AND PEOPLE ARE STARVING.
WE'RE AWARE.
ACTUALLY, UM...
IT'S ALICE.
SHE WAS UNDER THE
MISAPPREHENSION
THAT THIS WAS A
SURPRISE BIRTHDAY PARTY
FOR HER.
OH, SHIT.
IT'S ALICE'S BIRTHDAY.
I FORGOT.
ME TOO.
WHO DO YOU HAVE
TO FUCK AROUND HERE
TO GET A BEER?
SORRY.
KIDDIE PARTY.
HEY, EVERYBODY.
HEY, EVERYBODY.
IT'S TIME FOR CAKE.
IT'S TIME FOR CAKE.
CAKE TIME.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
THAT'S REALLY COOL.
WOW.
WELL... YEAH.
CAN I HAVE HER?
DO YOU WANT TO
BLOW OUT THE CANDLE?
READY, BIRTHDAY GIRL?
READY?
JANE!
JANE...
THERE'S SOMEBODY
I WANT YOU TO MEET.
THIS IS LUIS.
HELLO.
HELLO.
GO ON. DANCE.
DANCE.
WHAT'S UP, LUIS?
I LOVE HER.
WHO'S THAT?
I LOVE CARMEN.
I'VE LOVED HER SINCE
I WAS A LITTLE BOY.
SHE ONLY SEES ME AS A FRIEND.
MAYBE YOU CAN
TALK TO HER FOR ME.
MERCEDES SAYS
YOU'RE HER BEST FRIEND.
YOU COULD TELL HER I LOVE HER
AND I'LL BE GOOD TO HER.
YOU KNOW, LUIS, UH...
MAYBE THESE FEELINGS
YOU HAVE FOR CARMEN...
MAYBE THEY'RE NOT
THE SAME FOR HER.
HI.
HI.
HI.
MIND IF I CUT IN?
OKAY.
ISN'T THIS A LITTLE RISKY?
AH, I DIDN'T TELL YOU
THAT IN THE LATINO CULTURE,
IT'S OKAY IF TWO GIRLS
DANCE WITH EACH OTHER.
IT'S NOT EXACTLY QUEER.
YOU LEFT THAT PART OUT.
YES, I DID.
I LOVE YOUR HAIR.
YOU OWE ME.
I KNOW. THANK YOU.
YOU'RE WELCOME.
THANK YOU SO MUCH, ANGUS.
I HOPE YOU HAD A GOOD TIME.
I, UH...
I RAN INTO AN EX OF MINE.
THAT MEANS THREE
OF MY EX-GIRLFRIENDS
ARE NOW LESBIANS.
WOW.
THAT'S QUITE A RECORD.
WHAT CAN I SAY?
I'M ATTRACTED TO WOMEN
WHO LIKE TO GO DOWN
ON OTHER WOMEN.
UH, WE WANT TO
ASK YOU SOMETHING.
OKAY.
UM, TINA AND I WERE THINKING
ABOUT HIRING A
NANNY FOR ANGELICA,
JUST PART-TIME.
AND WE KNOW
THAT YOU WERE LOOKING
FOR PART-TIME WORK.
AND WE JUST THINK
IT WOULD BE GREAT FOR ANGELICA
TO HAVE A MAN IN HER LIFE.
YOU KNOW, I MEAN, SOMEBODY
THAT SHE'S CLOSE TO.
A SCRATCHY FACE.
A FAMILIAR VOICE.
I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU MEAN.
I'D BE HONORED.
GREAT. GREAT.
THANKS, YOU GUYS.
THAT WAS AN AWESOME BIRTHDAY.
YOU'RE WELCOME.
AND I DON'T THINK I
THOUGHT OF DANA
FOR, LIKE, 47
MINUTES... KIND OF.
THAT'S GOOD, RIGHT?
THAT'S REALLY GOOD.
OH, HOW WAS IT TODAY, BABY?
YOU'RE REALLY TIGHT.
I KNOW. GEORGE
IS KICKING MY BUTT.
IT'S WEIRD.
IT'S LIKE HE WANTS ME
TO WIN THIS TOURNAMENT
MORE THAN I DO.
HEY, WHAT...
WHAT DID DR. GRUBMAN SAY?
SHIT. FORGOT.
DANA, DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA
HOW HARD IT WAS FOR ME TO
GET YOU THAT APPOINTMENT?
I HAD TO PROMISE TO
CATER A PRIVATE DINNER
FOR HIM AND HIS WIFE
JUST TO GET YOU IN
THERE BEFORE JUNE.
OH, NO.
AND YOU KNOW THAT AT 30
YOU SHOULD GO AND GET AN EXAM
ONCE A YEAR.
YOU KNOW THAT.
I KNOW. IT'S JUST...
I'M SORRY. I JUST...
I'VE NEVER BEEN TO
A MALE GYNO BEFORE.
I THINK IT'S WEIRD,
AND I JUST DON'T WANT SOME
DUDE LOOKING UP MY WOODLE.
LOOKING UP YOUR WOODLE?
WELL, THEN WHY DON'T YOU
JUST GO TO A LADY DOCTOR?
OKAY.
BUT JUST GO, OKAY?
YES.
I THINK BETTE AND TINA
HAVE A LADY DOCTOR.
I'LL CALL HER TOMORROW, OKAY?
OKAY.
HMM. WHAT IS THIS?
WHAT'S BEAR NIGHT?
THIS'LL BE FUN.
COME ON.
♪ I KNOW THAT YOU CAME
HERE TO BREAK MY HEART ♪
♪ ARE YOU REALLY THAT BLIND? ♪
WOW. THIS IS GREAT.
♪ WHO'S MAKING WHO CRY? ♪
♪ WHO'S SAYING GOODBYE? ♪
♪ WHO'S DRIVING YOU CRAZY
WITH A LOVE THAT WON'T DIE? ♪
♪ WHO'S LEAVING WHO NOW? ♪
♪ WHO'S BRINGING WHO DOWN? ♪
♪ I'M MOVING YOUR BABY ♪
♪ WHILE YOU'RE STILL
HANGING AROUND ♪
♪ HONEY, YOU CAN'T DENY ♪
♪ WHO'S MAKING WHO CRY ♪
OKAY, EVERY SINGLE
PERSON IN MY FAMILY
ADORES YOU.
MY MOTHER, SHE
ABSOLUTELY LOVES YOU.
I LOVE THEM, TOO.
MM. YOU DO?
MM-HMM.
BUT I WONDER HOW
MUCH THEY'D LOVE ME
IF THEY KNEW
I WAS FUCKING THEIR DAUGHTER.
OOH.
WELL, I WONDER
WHO'S GOING TO BE
DOING THE FUCKING
TONIGHT,
BECAUSE YOU LOOKED PRETTY GIRLY
IN THAT DRESS YOU HAD ON.
WELL...
YOU LOOK A LITTLE
GIRLY YOURSELF.
OH...
♪ STROLLIN' IN THE PARK ♪
♪ WATCHIN' WINTER
TURN TO SPRING ♪
♪ WALKIN' IN THE DARK ♪
♪ WATCHIN' LOVERS
DO THEIR THING ♪
♪ THAT'S THE TIME ♪
♪ I FEEL LIKE MAKIN'
LOVE TO YOU ♪
♪ THAT'S THE TIME... ♪
NO...
NO, NO, NO, DON'T ANSWER
IT. DON'T ANSWER IT.
NO, NO, NO, IT'S LATE.
WHAT IF IT'S AN EMERGENCY?
NO, NO, NO.
HELLO?
HI, JENNY.
UH...
YEAH. ARE YOU... ARE YOU OKAY?
YEAH, I'M FINE.
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. DON'T WORRY.
YEAH, WE'RE JUST...
WE'RE JUST TAKING OUR TIME.
WE'RE GOING TO BE
THERE IN A COUPLE OF DAYS.
UH-HUH.
OH, MY FRIEND MOIRA
DECIDED TO TAKE
HER PICKUP TRUCK,
AND WE'RE DRIVING
ACROSS THE COUNTRY NOW.
WHAT?
MY GIRLFRIEND?
HANG ON.
EXCUSE ME. MOIRA.
ARE YOU MY GIRLFRIEND?
WE DON'T KNOW.
"IT'S NOT DESIRE
THAT'S THE PROBLEM,"
ONE OF MY TEACHERS USED TO SAY.
"IT'S THAT YOUR
DESIRES ARE TOO SMALL."
THIS SHIFT IN CONSCIOUSNESS
IS WHAT LINKS THE WORLDS OF
ART, THERAPY, AND MEDITATION.
JAMES JOYCE DESCRIBED
THE MENTAL POSTURE
REQUIRED TO
APPRECIATE A WORK OF ART
AS "BEHOLDING."
"IF YOU PULL IT TOO CLOSE,
"IT BECOMES PORNOGRAPHY,
"AND IF YOU DISTANCE YOURSELF,
IT BECOMES CRITICISM."
♪ MY STUBBORN SKIN
IS WEARING THIN ♪
♪ I BARED MY SOUL
YOU WALTZED RIGHT IN ♪
♪ I GAVE YOU EVERYTHING ♪
♪ AND YOU JUST MADE
ME FEEL SO VERY ♪
♪ NAKED ♪
♪ AND I DON'T REMEMBER ♪
♪ I SPILLED MY GUTS
ON YOUR BEST SHOES ♪
♪ YOU KEEP IT IN
I LET IT LOOSE ♪
♪ IT'S ONLY LOVE ♪
♪ THAT MAKES ME FEEL LIKE
GETTING SO COMPLETELY ♪
♪ NAKED ♪
♪ AND I DON'T REMEMBER ♪
♪ HOW I LET MYSELF
BECOME SO UNRAVELED ♪
♪ I'M NAKED ♪
♪ PRETTY AS A HEARTACHE ♪
♪ WAITING FOR MY SECOND SKIN ♪
♪ TO SETTLE IN ♪