The Jeffersons (1975–1985): Season 6, Episode 6 - Where's Papa? - full transcript

♪ Well, we're movin' on up
♪ Movin' on up

♪ To the East Side
♪ Movin' on up

♪ To a deluxe apartment
in the sky

♪ Movin' on up
♪ Movin' on up

♪ To the East Side
♪ Movin' on up

♪ We finally got
a piece of the pie

♪ Fish don't fry
in the kitchen

♪ Beans don't burn
on the grill

♪ Took a whole lot of tryin'

♪ Just to get up that hill

♪ Now we're up
in the big leagues



♪ Gettin' our turn at bat

♪ As long as we live,
it's you and me, baby

♪ Ain't nothin' wrong
with that

♪ We're movin' on up
♪ Movin' on up

♪ To the East Side
♪ Movin' on up

♪ To a deluxe apartment
in the sky

♪ Movin' on up
♪ Movin' on up

♪ To the East Side
♪ Movin' on up

♪ We finally got
a piece of the pie ♪

You know, Weez, I'm glad

we're finally gettin' rid
of some of this junk

out of the storage box.

Yeah, me, too.

We shouldn't let this stuff
pile up like this.



Yeah, you're right.

I can't believe
we kept all this junk.

Yeah, I know.

Well, that's that box.

Now,
I'll just empty
the wastebasket.

Weezy, what are you doin'?
I thought we was throwin'
all this stuff away.

Well, all these things
have sentimental value to me.

Look at this corsage.

You bought this for me
on our first formal date.

Yeah, and it held up
pretty good, too, huh?

Yeah, plastic usually does.

Here you are,
Mr. Jefferson, sir.

That's all right.
I got it.

I got it, sir. Yup.

It sure is a heavy one.

Now, we gotta make sure
we don't hurt the back.

There you are,
Mr. Jefferson, sir.

Thanks, Ralph.

I was careful
in bringing it up
from the storage locker, sir.

Oh, good job, Ralph.

Very, very careful.

I figured that this trunk
probably contained

some mementos
you wouldn't want damaged.

I mean,
you can't put
a price on memories.

No, Ralph.
See, most of that stuff
we gonna throw away.

But then again,
memories are a dime a dozen.

Uh, yeah.
Well, thanks
for your help, Ralph.

Oh, you're welcome, sir.
You're very welcome.

Okay.

You know,
while we're on
the subject of memories,

I can remember
when the dollar was worth
twice as much as it is now.

Why, 20 years ago,

these two dollars were
actually worth four.

Oh, they were?
Oh, yes, sir.

Oh, well, look,
why don't you pretend
it's 20 years ago.

Now you still got two.

George, where did
that trunk come from?

It's Mama's.

I had it sent over
after she died.

Uh-oh.

What's wrong?

This is just
like that Dracula movie
I saw on TV last night.

Will you shut up?

See, Dracula had already bitten

all the people in Transylvania.

So he had
himself mailed
to the United States

in a trunk just like that one.

And then this guy
opened up the trunk
and Dracula flew out,

bit him on the neck,
sucked all the blood
out of him,

threw him on the floor
and left him there, dead.

Now, that is stupid.

Florence,
will you open the trunk?

Oh, George.

Boo!

Florence!

Well, look at all this junk.

It'll take me a month
to straighten this stuff out.

Look at it.

Oh, Weez,
here's a picture
of Mama and Papa

when they were at Coney Island.

Oh, don't they look happy?

Well, no wonder.
Look at the size of that
kewpie doll they're holding.

Kewpie doll?
That's me.

Oh.
Oh, the booby prize, huh?

You know, George,
your father
was quite handsome.

Well, you know,
good looks run
in our family.

Where did they run
when you were born?

I wish I had known your father.

Yeah, me, too.

I was only
nine years old
when he died.

Once of the few things
I can remember is

he used to always
take me to Coney Island.

We used to go
on the roller coaster.

I used to get sick
on my stomach
and throw up.

Boy, that was fun.

Uh-oh, here's my first teacher.

Teacher?
That's a boot.

I know.
It's one of
Pop's old boots.

Boy,
this boot sure taught
my butt a thing or two.

What's this?

Why don't you
open it up and see?

Uh-oh.
This is just like
that spooky movie I saw.

This man
opens up this envelope
and his fingers fall off.

Florence, will you shut up?

Weezy, I don't believe it.

This is Papa's will.

"I, William T. Jefferson,

"being of sound mind
and tired body,

"do declare the following.

"To my wife, Olivia,
I leave all my valuables,

"including
my watch, my radio
and two pawnshop tickets

"if she wants to get
the watch and radio.

"I guess
I ain't got much more
to leave except my love.

"The only other thing
I have to say, Olivia,

"is that if I do go first,

"please make sure
we get buried next
to each other.

"That way we'll always
be together, me and you."

Oh, isn't that touching?

Yeah, except Papa's
buried up there in Rockridge

in that old pauper's cemetery

and Mama's over there
in Shady Hills.

Wait a minute, I got it!

Got what?

I'm gonna have
Papa moved over to
Shady Hills with Mama.

Move him?

What you gonna do, call Bekins?

Look, I always wanted to
do something for my father,

so now's my chance.

George, that's a very nice idea,

I... I guess.

But don't you think
your father would want
to stay where he is?

I mean, by now
he's probably comfortable.

Yeah, leave the dead alone.

They got enough problems.

But, Weezy, didn't you hear
what Papa said in his will?

He wants to be buried
next to Mama.

That means it's up to me.

All right, George.

If you really feel that way.

Good, Weez.
Now, look,

I want you to go
over to Rockridge and make
all the arrangements, okay?

Me? I thought
it was up to you.

But, Weezy, I haven't
been to Rockridge
since I was a kid.

And besides, I gotta
go over to Shady Hills

and get a place
for Papa next to Mama.

Okay, George, if you
really want me to, I'll go.

Oh, thanks, Weez.
I knew I could count on you.

Okay, I'll see you all later.

Florence,
why don't you go
with me to the cemetery?

Me?

Yeah. We can't let
George's father down.

We can't bring him up, either.

Hello?

Gee, Florence,
there doesn't seem
to be anybody here.

Florence?

Florence, what are
you doing out there?

Right now,
I'm doing the 23rd Psalm.

Well,
there's nothing
to be afraid of.

I guess you're right.

Hi, ladies.

I'm sorry if I frightened you.

I'm Homer Calder,

caretaker, record-keeper
and handyman.

Oh, well, that must
keep you very busy.

No. Actually,
it's pretty quiet around here.

I should hope so.

Uh, Mr. Calder,
I'm Louise Jefferson.

This is Florence Johnston.

Oh, how are you?

Alive and well, thank you.

Uh, we're here with kind
of a strange request.

You see, my father-in-law
is buried here,

and we'd like to move him
over to Shady Hills.

Don't get much call for that.

Once I plant 'em,
they usually stay planted.

I know.

We saw your garden
on the way in.

Uh, exactly what do
we have to do to move
the remains?

If he hands us that shovel,
I'm leaving.

First off, Mrs. Jefferson,
I have to know the name
of the deceased.

Uh, William Jefferson.
William Jefferson.

He died in 1939.

1939.

Oh. Oh, I'm sorry,
I can't help you.

Why not?

Big fire here
in '53 burned up
all the older records.

Well,
you must have
some other files.

Nope. Sorry.

Oh, come on, Florence.
We have to go look on
the headstones.

Oh, no, you can't do that.

No, we can't do that.

Why not?

Vandals got to the older graves.

No headstones left.

They stole the headstones?

Yeah.
I hear they make
nice coffee tables.

But if there are
no records or headstones,

how are we supposed to
find my husband's father?

Oh, uh, do you know
the plot number?

No.

Oh. Then I guess
there's nothin'
I can do.

You mean you lost
my husband's father?

Don't worry.
I'm sure he didn't go far.

I hope I don't see

another graveyard
till the day I die.

How am I
gonna tell George
his father is missing?

Does he understand Morse code?

Hey, Weez.

Oh, George.

Hey, did you talk
to those people
over at Rockridge?

Well, yes, but...

Hey, Weezy, thanks.
I knew I could depend on you.

Uh, but, George,
there's something
I've got to tell you.

Yeah?

Well, what I have
to tell you is that...

That Florence has
something to tell you.

Yeah, what is it, Florence?

Um, uh, I have to go fix lunch.

But I ain't hungry yet.

That's no problem.
I'll eat it.

You know,
if I didn't know better,
I'd say she was overworked.

George...
Hey, Weezy,
guess what I did?

I went up to Shady Hills
and I bought a plot
for $10,000.

$10,000?

Yeah, a family plot.

You know, that way
we could all be together.

You, me, Mama and Papa.

Well, three out of four
ain't bad.

Say what?

Uh, George,
about your father.
There's a problem.

Problem?
What kind of problem?

Oh, well, when I tell you,
you promise not to yell?

Weezy, you know me.

Okay, I promise.

Your father is missing.

Missing?

George,
you promised not to yell.

I'm not yelling.
I'm just talkin' loud!

Your father is still
at the cemetery someplace.

But the records
have all been destroyed
and the headstones stolen.

There's no way
we can locate him.

He's just lost.

Lost?

I'm sorry.

But the people at Rockridge
did what they could.

Did what they could?
That's my father they lost,

not a softball game!

Well, there's nothing we can do.

There's gotta be.

Do you know the number
of your father's plot?

No. What do you think I do?
Carry it around in my wallet?

Then there's no way to find him.

Damn!

George,
where are you going?
I'm not sure.

City Hall, the Hall of Records,

whatever it takes,
I'm gonna find my father.

Where'd he go?

To look for his father.

Well, what's he gonna do,

go door-to-door?

Thanks, Charley.
You're welcome.

Hey, Mr. Jefferson.
Don't worry.

Okay, so your father's lost.

But things could be worse.

Oh, yeah? How would you feel
if you were dead and didn't
know where you were?

Gee, I never thought
of it that way.

I spent the whole day
trying to find him.

I even went back
to our old building.

I figured
maybe somebody there
would remember my father.

Oh, yeah? Any luck?

Well, I met this bum
on the stairway

that said he remembered him.

He had me believin' him, too,
at first,

till he told me
he was Sammy Davis, Jr.

Then he started
singing Candy Man.

Yeah, I love that song.

Not the way he sang it.

Hello, Mr. J!

I mean, hello, Mr. J.

Mrs. J told me
about your father.

I can imagine
what you must
be going through.

If there's anything I can
possibly do for you, Mr. J?

Yeah, Bentley, stop shakin' me!

Anything at all?
Oh, I'm sorry.

It's okay.
It's okay, Bentley.
It's not your fault.

It's just no use.
He's lost.

I'll never find him.

Well, you have to look
on the bright side.

What's the bright side?

I don't know.
That's why you
have to look for it.

Yeah.

See,
if I'd only visited
his grave more often,

this never would have happened.

Oh, you can't
blame yourself.
Yes, I can!

Well, if you really want to.

How would you like it
if you didn't know where
your father was buried?

Oh, I'd like it
just fine, actually.

My father's still alive.

If I could just remember.

Mr. J, perhaps you're
blocking out something

that's locked up
inside your brain.

That's crazy, Bentley.

Ain't nothing inside my brain.

You know,
I once had a friend
who lost a diamond earring

and you know what happened?

Who cares?

Her husband took her
to see a hypnotist.

A hypnotist?
That's right.

And the hypnotist got her
to remember where she left
the earring.

Oh, I bet that
made her happy, huh?

Uh, no.
It made her divorced.

She left the earring
in another man's apartment.

Well, at least
the hypnotism worked.

Say, Mr. Jefferson,
maybe you ought to
give it a chance, huh?

You think so?

Well, it's worth a try.
If you're interested,

I have a friend
who's a hypnotist.

I could give him a ring
and see if he could
drop by tonight.

Okay, good.
Go get him, Bentley.
Right-o!

Oh, Mr. J,
I'm very happy

you've decided
to put yourself
in my hands.

I'm terribly sorry.

You know, I just hope
this hypnotism stuff
ain't a waste of time.

Well, why should it be?

Well, look, I read this article

that said hypnotism
doesn't always work
on intelligent people.

Oh, well,
I'm sure you got
nothing to worry about.

I wish I knew
what was going on in there.

Yeah, Mr. Jefferson
being hypnotized.

You know, this might
be a good time to ask
for a raise.

George?

I have him under,
Mrs. Jefferson.

He'll only respond to me.

I'll need help
in understanding some of
the things he's talking about.

Well, don't ask me,
'cause I never know
what he's talking about.

What I mean is,

I'm going
to take him back gradually,
just to see how he responds.

I'll use this information

that you gave me
about your husband's life.

All right.

Now, Mr. Jefferson,

I want you to think
back to the time

when you first moved
into this apartment, okay?

Tell us about it.

Man, Weez,
this place is great, ain't it?

Oh, about the maid,

I really think we should hire

that Florence Johnston.

I got a feeling
she'd be a real
hard worker.

Ain't that the truth?

Yeah, Weezy,
I know you wanna
hire the other maid.

All right, Mr. Jefferson,

let's go back
a little bit further.

Now, you're living
in your new house
on Hauser Street.

What do you see?
Damn it, Bunker!

You know, you're
the most prejudiced bigot
I've ever seen in my life.

Don't be... to me.

Listen, Bunker, you know,
you got some nerve telling me
I can't move next door to you.

You stupid honkey.
What?

That's fine,
Mr. Jefferson.

That's fine.

Who is this Bunker?

Oh, he used to be
our next door neighbor.

Why, he sounds
like a real meathead.

Well, his wife was nice.

All right, Mr. Jefferson.

Now, I want you to go on back

and remember the birth
of your son, Lionel. Okay?

Oh, Lionel.

You know,
you're the cutest
little baby I ever saw.

You look just like me.

But don't tell your mommy,
'cause she thinks you look
like her.

Coochie coo.

Okay,
little Mr. Jefferson,
let me see you laugh.

Come on, like this.

See? Like that.

That's it. That's it.

Oh, Lionel.

Oh, Lionel!

That's fine,
Mr. Jefferson.

Now, let's go back
a little further to
the time when you were 16.

It's the day
you first met Louise.

Now this I gotta see.

Hey, man, look,
I can't hang with
you niggers tonight.

I got me a date. Yeah.

Some chick named Louise.

Yeah, I know it's a funny name.

That's why
I just call her Weez
to keep from laughing.

But I tell you one thing.
This chick's got class.

Well, yeah, she's
going out with me,
ain't she?

And you know me.
I always get lucky
on my first date.

And I'm telling you,
this chick is hot to trot.

I'm telling you.

Why, you...

Please, Mrs. Jefferson,
he doesn't know what
he's saying.

Tomorrow night?

I can't go out
tomorrow night,
either, man.

I got me a date
with my main babe, Ruby.

Ruby?

Yeah, you know her.
Ruby!

Uh, excuse me,
Mrs. Jefferson.

But this is between you
and your husband.

He, uh, seems
to be responding well.

Ruby!

A little too well!

All right,
let's just sit back
down here and relax.

That's it.
That's it.

You feel all right?

Ruby.

Just relax.

That's right.
Okay.

Now you're nine years old

and you're at
your father's funeral.

Tell me what you see.

Georgie?

Mommy, I don't like this place.

It scares me.

Tell me where
your father's buried.

Mommy,
please don't make me look.

Take me home.

Oh, Mommy, don't start crying.

The last thing Papa asked me

was to promise that
I would take care of you.

And I promised him that I would.

But I don't wanna stay here,
Mommy. I wanna go home.

Please, I don't wanna look.

Mommy, please.

Mommy, please! Mommy.

All right, Mr. Jefferson,

you're not at your father's
funeral anymore.

Everything's fine.
That's right.

I'm going to bring you out now.

All right.

Wake up.

See, I knew
I couldn't be hypnotized.

George, you were hypnotized.

I was?

I was!

Okay, where's Papa buried?

Oh, it didn't work, did it?

No, I'm sorry,
Mr. Jefferson.

If you ever did know,

it's embedded too deeply
in your subconscious.

I, uh, I think
we've done the best we could.

Oh, look, Doc,
don't feel bad about it.

I mean, it's not your fault.

It's just that hypnotism

just don't work too well on me.

I'm too intelligent.

Right.

Well, thanks
for your help anyway.

And, look,
just send me
the bill, okay?

Yeah. Thank you.
Anytime, Doc.

Good night, Mrs. Jefferson.
Good night, Doctor.

Bye-bye.
Good night.

Damn quack.

Uh, George...
I don't wanna
hear it, Weez.

But, George...
I said I don't
want to hear it!

Oh, you are going to hear it.

Damn it!

Look, George,
your father is missing

and there is nothing you can do.

Yeah.
And I didn't get a chance
to grant him his last request.

George, you already have.

Say what?

Dr. Tupperman took you
back to your father's funeral.

And according to what you said,

your father's real last request

was that you take care
of your mother.

It was?
That's right.

And you did take care of her.

You did everything
your father asked
you to and then some.

Yeah?

Yeah, well, then he did
get his last request.

He sure did.

Well, all right!

So, how do you feel now?

Oh, I feel great now.

Oh, look, Weez,
I'm gonna go get
ready for dinner. Hey.

Oh, George.
Yeah?

Uh, there is one thing.

Yeah? What?

Who the hell is Ruby?

Ruby?

Ruby!

Ruby, Ruby...

Oh! You mean Ruby?

How'd you know about her?

Hey, wait a minute!

♪ Movin', movin' on up ♪

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Public shouldn't leave reviews for lawyers.