The Jeffersons (1975–1985): Season 5, Episode 21 - Every Night Fever - full transcript

♪ WELL, WE'RE MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ TO THE EAST SIDE ♪

♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ TO A DELUXE APARTMENT ♪

♪ IN THE SKY ♪

♪ WE'RE MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ TO THE EAST SIDE ♪

♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ WE FINALLY GOT A PIECE
OF THE PIE ♪



♪ FISH DON'T FRY
IN THE KITCHEN ♪

♪ BEANS DON'T BURN
ON THE GRILL ♪

♪ TOOK A WHOLE LOT OF TRYIN' ♪

THAT HILL ♪
GET UP
♪ JUST TO

♪ NOW WE'RE UP
IN THE BIG LEAGUES ♪

♪ GETTIN' OUR TURN AT BAT ♪

♪ AS LONG AS WE LIVE ♪

♪ IT'S YOU AND ME, BABY ♪

♪ THERE AIN'T
NOTHIN' WRONG WITH THAT ♪

♪ WE'RE MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ TO THE EAST SIDE ♪

♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ TO A DELUXE APARTMENT ♪



♪ IN THE SKY ♪

♪ WE'RE MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ TO THE EAST SIDE ♪

♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ WE FINALLY GOT A PIECE
OF THE PIE ♪♪

GORGEOUS.

HELLO, MRS. J.
DO YOU HAVE ANY
CHERRIES?

I THINK SO.

GOOD.
I'M MAKING VALERIE'S
FAVORITE DRINK.

I CALL IT
AFTER 5.

WHAT'S AFTER 5?

I DON'T KNOW.
SHE'S NEVER DRUNK
MORE THAN 4.

WHAT A STUNNING DRESS.
MR. J WILL LOVE IT.

DO YOU THINK
IT'LL FIT HIM?

I SUPPOSE IF YOU TAKE
THE HEM UP A BIT.

I'M GOING TO
ASK FLORENCE
FOR THE CHERRIES.

FLORENCE ISN'T HERE.

THE CHERRIES
SHOULD BE
ON THE TOP SHELF.

THANK YOU.

HELLO.

HELLO, MR. WENTWORTH.
WHAT?

YOU WANT ME TO BE
IN THE HELP
CENTER'S PLAY?

TO REPLACE MELINDA?
I COULDN'T.
SHE'S VERY BEAUTIFUL.

AND I...

OH, WELL,
THANK YOU.

HOW MUCH REHEARSING
TIME WILL THERE BE?

I'M SORRY.

I WOULDN'T FEEL RIGHT
LEAVING MY HUSBAND ALONE
THAT MANY NIGHTS.

THANK YOU FOR ASKING.
GOOD-BYE.

WHAT WAS THAT ABOUT?

THE HELP CENTER'S
PUTTING ON
A PLAY TO RAISE MONEY.

THAT WAS THE DIRECTOR.

HE WANTED ME
TO PLAY A PART.

WHAT'D YOU TELL HIM?

I'D RATHER SPEND
MY EVENINGS WITH YOU.

OF COURSE YOU WOULD.

HELLO, MR. J.

- HEY, BENTLEY.
- THANKS FOR THE CHERRIES.

WITH ALL THOSE CHERRIES,
YOU CAN MAKE A GIFT PACK.

FRUITS AND NUT.

THAT'S VERY GOOD, MR. J.

I HOPE VALERIE
HAS FUN UNWRAPPING ME.

GEORGE?

WHAT IS IT?

DO YOU NOTICE ANYTHING
DIFFERENT ABOUT ME?

OH, YEAH.
YOUR DIET'S WORKING!

I'M TALKING ABOUT
MY NEW DRESS.

SO AM I.
YOU FIT IN IT,
DIDN'T YOU?

I BOUGHT IT
ESPECIALLY
FOR TONIGHT.

YOU AIN'T GOTTA
GET DRESSED UP JUST
TO WATCH ME WORK.

WHAT'S FOR DINNER?

NOTHING.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

I THOUGHT IT WOULD
BE FUN TO GO OUT.

I CAN'T. I GOTTA
LOOK OVER
ALL THESE PAPERS.

THEY CAN WAIT.
LET'S GO
OUT ON THE TOWN.

WHERE?

A DISCO.

A DISCO?

DISCO'S WHERE
IT'S AT.

IT AIN'T GOIN' TO BE
WHERE I'M AT TONIGHT.

THERE'S A GREAT NEW ONE
CALLED DIRTY BETTY'S.

I'D RATHER STAY HERE
AT FILTHY FLORENCE'S.

I'M NOT ARGUING
ABOUT IT ANYMORE.

GOOD, WEEZY.

I LIKE QUIET
WHEN I WORK.

I WON'T BE QUIET
UNLESS YOU TAKE ME OUT.

WEEZY...

IT'LL BE HEALTHY.

HEALTHY?
HOW?

IF YOU DON'T,
I'LL BREAK YOUR LEGS.

ISN'T THIS GREAT?

IT'S STUPID.

LOOKS LIKE A CIRCUS.

DID YOU SEE THAT?

I'LL GIVE HIM
MY CARD.

WHAT FOR?

HE'S GOING TO NEED
HIS PANTS CLEANED.

STOP THINKING ABOUT WORK.

LET'S GET DOWN.

I HOPE I CAN
GET BACK UP AGAIN.

THIS WAS
A GREAT IDEA!

YEAH.

IT'S ALMOST MIDNIGHT.

ONLY FOUR HOURS
TILL CLOSING.

GEORGE, SHOULDN'T WE
BE LEAVING SOON?

I HAVEN'T GOT
MY SECOND WIND YET.

I'M TIRED.

OH, WAIT.
COME ON, WEEZY!

I'M SITTIN' THIS ONE OUT.

♪ JIVE TALKIN' ♪

♪ YOU'RE TELLIN' ME LIES ♪

♪ JIVE TALKIN' ♪

♪ YOU WEAR A DISGUISE ♪

♪ JIVE TALKIN' ♪

♪ SO MISUNDERSTOOD ♪

♪ JIVE TALKIN' ♪

♪ YOU'RE REALLY NO GOOD ♪

♪ OH, MY CHILD ♪

♪ YOU'LL NEVER KNOW ♪

♪ JUST WHAT YOU MEAN TO ME ♪

♪ OH, MY CHILD ♪

♪ YOU'VE GOT SO MUCH ♪

♪ YOU'RE GONNA TAKE AWAY
MY ENERGY ♪

♪ WITH ALL YOUR
JIVE TALKIN' ♪

♪ YOU'RE TELLIN' ME LIES ♪

♪ GOOD LOVIN'
STILL GETS IN MY EYES ♪♪

HI, LOUISE.

HI.
COME IN.

OOH!

WHAT'S WRONG?

I'M SORE
FROM TOO MUCH DANCING.

TOO MUCH DANCING?

WE'VE BEEN OUT DISCOING
FOR THE PAST THREE NIGHTS.

HE'S GOING OUT TONIGHT
BY HIMSELF.

WHAT'S GOTTEN INTO HIM?

DISCO FEVER.

WHO ARE YOU
SUPPOSED TO BE?

SAMMY DAVIS III?

IT'S "IN"
AT DIRTY BETTY'S.

WHAT'S DIRTY BETTY'S?

MY DESTINATION
FOR TONIGHT.

SEE YOU, WEEZ.

FREAK OUT!
HA!

I DON'T BELIEVE
WHAT I JUST SAW.

EVERY NIGHT,
HE COMES HOME,

WOLFS HIS DINNER,
AND CHANGES FROM A BUSINESSMAN

INTO A DISCO DUCK.

WHAT IDIOT
GAVE HIM THE IDEA?

ME.

I DIDN'T MEAN...

IT'S MY OWN FAULT.

I TOLD HIM
TO GET OUT AND LIVE.

MAYBE WE COULD
GO TALK HIM OUT OF IT.

OH, HELEN.
WOULD YOU?

WOULD HE PAY ATTENTION?

HE NEVER HAS BEFORE.

YOU ARE MY ONLY HOPE!

LET'S GIVE IT
A WHIRL.

IF THIS WORKS,
I OWE YOU A FAVOR.

MAYBE YOU CAN GET GEORGE
TO STOP CALLING ME "HONKY."

I SAID FAVOR,
NOT A MIRACLE.

♪ AHHH ♪

♪ AH, AH,
AH, AH,
AHHH ♪

♪ AHHH ♪

♪ AH, AH,
AH, AH,
AHHH ♪

♪ YOU SET MY LIPS
ON FIRE ♪

♪ YOU ARE THE KEY
TO MY HEART ♪

♪ YOU'VE GOT A SPECIAL WAY
TO MOVE ME ♪

♪ CAN'T STOP IT ♪♪

THERE HE IS!

MR. HAPPY FEET
IN ACTION.

WE'LL HAVE TO WAIT
UNTIL HE SITS DOWN.

HE NEVER SITS DOWN.

LET'S GO
TALK TO HIM.

DON'T WORRY.

HELEN WILL TALK
SOME SENSE INTO HIM.

I HOPE SO.

♪ INSTANT REPLAY ♪

♪ INSTANT REPLAY ♪

♪ INSTANT REPLAY ♪

WHAT YOU DOIN' HERE?

I CAME HERE
TO TALK TO YOU.

YOU AIN'T
A BAD DANCER.

THANKS, BUT...

GET DOWN, HELEN.

HELEN, DID YOU
TALK TO HIM?

NOT YET.

HELEN...

I'M BUSY.

ALL RIGHT!

♪ INSTANT REPLAY ♪

♪ INSTANT REPLAY ♪

♪ INSTANT REPLAY ♪♪

B-O-R-E-D.
BORED.

VERY GOOD, LOUISE.

THANKS.

YOU GET
TWICE AS MANY POINTS.

I'M TWICE AS BORED
AS LAST NIGHT.

WE COULD PLAY BACKGAMMON.

WE PLAYED THAT YESTERDAY
AND GIN BEFORE THAT.

HOW ABOUT CHARADES?

FIRST WORD.

IT'S RIDICULOUS.

NO.
IT'S A BIRD.

THIS WHOLE THING
IS RIDICULOUS.

GEORGE AND HELEN
HAVE BEEN DISCOING

FOR THE PAST THREE NIGHTS
WHILE WE SIT HERE.

YEAH.

WE'RE MARRIED TO
A COUPLE OF DISCO JUNKIES.

YOU'RE RIGHT, LOUISE.

I'M FED UP.

I'LL TELL HELEN
TO KNOCK IT OFF.

WHEN GEORGE GETS HOME,

I'M GOING TO PLUCK
THE FEATHERS

OFF THAT LITTLE
DISCO DUCK.

FREAK OUT!

HEY!

I WANT TO TALK.

LATER.
THIS DISCOING
MAKES ME THIRSTY.

GEORGE...

HELEN, I HAVE SOMETHING
TO SAY TO YOU.

YES?

UH...
CAN I GET YOU
SOMETHING TO DRINK?

TOM!

OH, RIGHT.

HELEN, IT'S...
IT'S JUST THAT I'M...

TIRED OF
SITTING HOME ALONE?

YES.

WANT ME
TO QUIT DANCING?

YES.

OK.

I'VE GIVEN THIS...

REALLY?

DO YOU MEAN IT?

YOU'RE LOOKING AT A LADY
WHO'S DISCOED OUT.

I AIN'T GOT ANOTHER HUSTLE
LEFT IN MY BUSTLE.

TOM, LET'S GO.

GOOD NIGHT.

JUST DON'T LET YOURSELF
GET BOSSED AROUND.

LET'S GO!

COMING, SWEETHEART.

I'VE GOT
A SURPRISE FOR YOU.

A NEW DISCO SHIRT?

HELEN'S GIVEN UP DISCO.

WHY?

TO STAY HOME
WITH TOM.

NOW THAT IS DUMB.

I THOUGHT THAT
WOULD SHAKE YOU UP.

I'LL FIND
ANOTHER PARTNER.

WHAT?

THE GIRLS AT DIRTY BETTY'S
ARE STANDING IN LINE

TO DANCE WITH "MOTOR HIPS."

"MOTOR HIPS"?

THAT'S ME.

I'M TIRED OF SITTING HOME
ALONE EVERY NIGHT.

DO SOMETHING.

LIKE WHAT?

JUST DO
YOUR OWN THING.

MY OWN THING?

I'M DISCOING TO DEATH!

IS THAT ALL
YOU HAVE TO SAY?

I'M AFRAID SO.

DIRTY BETTY'S
IS IN FOR A TREAT

WHEN OLD MOTOR HIPS
MOVES HIS MAGIC FEET.

I'M GLAD
YOU'RE IN THE PLAY.

DO YOU THINK
I CAN DO IT?

OF COURSE.

LET'S GO OVER
THAT SCENE AGAIN.

WE CAN'T
GO ON LIKE THIS.

I'VE GOT TO TELL
MY HUSBAND.

MY PRIVATE PLANE
IS WAITING
AT THE AIRPORT.

WE'LL SEND A TELEGRAM
FROM RIO.

TELEGRAM?

THAT'S A COLD WAY
TO END A MARRIAGE.

OK.
WE'LL SEND HIM
A CANDY GRAM.

GARY,
THIS IS SERIOUS.

WHAT'S GOIN' ON HERE?

I DIDN'T EXPECT YOU
SO EARLY.

WHAT'S GOIN' ON
AROUND HERE?

THIS IS CLIFFORD WENTWORTH,
THE PLAY DIRECTOR.

WHAT IS THIS?
YOU'RE NOT IN THE CAST.

HANDS OFF MY WIFE
OR YOU'LL BE IN A CAST.

THIS IS MY HUSBAND.

I COULD GET YOU A PART
IN THE WIZ...

AS A MUNCHKIN.

WHO ARE YOU,
THE WICKED WITCH
OF THE WEST?

MR. WENTWORTH IS ONE OF
NEW YORK'S FINEST DIRECTORS.

I BET HE CAN'T
DIRECT TRAFFIC
ON A ONE-WAY STREET.

I CANNOT CREATE
UNDER THESE CONDITIONS.

I ASSURE YOU,
HE WON'T BOTHER US AGAIN.

WHERE'S MY LUNCH?

GET IT YOURSELF!
I'M BUSY.

I'VE ONLY GOT...

GEORGE,
I SAID I'M BUSY!

THERE'LL BE NO MORE
INTERRUPTIONS.

LET'S HOPE NOT.

LET'S TAKE IT
FROM THE SECOND ACT.

THIS IS
THE CRITICAL SCENE.

DO AS I SAY.

USE YOUR BODY AS
A DRAMATIC INSTRUMENT.

ARE YOU READY?

YES.

ALL RIGHT.

YOU'RE ALONE
IN YOUR HOTEL ROOM.

YOUR LOVER
HASN'T CALLED.

YOU'RE ANGRY.

ANGRIER.

YOU HEAR A KNOCK.
COULD IT BE HIM?

YOU BRIGHTEN,
RUN TO THE DOOR.

IT WAS ONLY
THE WIND.

YOU CLOSE THE DOOR.

YOU'RE DEPRESSED.

DID YOU SLAM
YOUR FINGER?

NO.
WHY?

THAT LOOK OF PAIN!

THAT WAS
MY DEPRESSED LOOK.

I SEE.

LET'S PROCEED.

YOU NEED A DRINK.

THAT'S
THE EASY WAY OUT.

YOU DECIDE TO CALL.

YOU WON'T GIVE HIM
THE SATISFACTION.

YOU NEED THAT DRINK.

YOU MUST CALL HIM.

THE LINE'S DEAD.

A LOOK OF HORROR

COMES OVER YOUR FACE.

THE SECRET POLICE
HAVE CUT THE LINE!

THEY KNOW
WHERE YOU ARE!

YOU'RE TERRIFIED!

SUDDENLY,
YOU HEAR A SCREAM!

BOLOGNA!

GEORGE!

I CAN'T EVEN FIND
BOLOGNA.

I BELIEVE
HIS TROUGH IS EMPTY.

IF YOU WANT BOLOGNA,
LOOK IN A MIRROR!

LET'S GO ON.

OK,
BUT THIS TIME,
PLAY IT BIGGER.

BIGGER?

BIGGER!

WHAT DID YOU CALL ME, HONKY?

DO YOU HAVE TO
STAY IN HERE?

I CAN STAY
WHEREVER I WANT.

IF I FOUND YOU IN MY APARTMENT,
I'D SPRAY YOU WITH RAID.

WHAT?

WE'VE GOT THREE WEEKS
TO GET THIS PLAY READY.

YOU'LL HAVE TO SOLVE
YOUR PERSONAL PROBLEMS.

I'M GOING BACK
TO THE HELP CENTER.

PEASANT!

TURKEY!

THANKS A LOT, GEORGE.

SOUNDED LIKE
A DUMB PLAY.

IT'S A GOOD PLAY
WITH A FINE DIRECTOR.

I'LL BE REHEARSING
AFTERNOONS AND EVENINGS.

AIN'T YOU
FORGETTIN' SOMETHING?

WHAT?

WHAT ABOUT MY LUNCH?

I WON'T BE HERE.

BUT, WEEZY...

I'M JUST FOLLOWING
YOUR ADVICE.

I'M DOING MY OWN THING.

IT'S OVER, SARAH.
I'M LEAVING FOR SWITZERLAND.

BRAVO, MRS. J.
THAT'S PERFECT.

THANKS.

I'M STILL NERVOUS
ABOUT FACING
AN AUDIENCE.

STAGE FRIGHT.

MY GREAT-UNCLE
ONCE APPEARED
BEFORE A LARGE CROWD.

WAS HE NERVOUS?

YES, BUT SOON
HIS NERVOUSNESS
DISAPPEARED.

WHAT HAPPENED?

THEY HANGED HIM.

HI, WEEZ.

YOU'RE NOT DRESSED
FOR DISCOING.

YOU'LL BE LATE.

I'M NOT GOIN'.

WHAT?

I'D RATHER STAY HOME
WITH MY SWEET, LOVING,
WONDERFUL WIFE.

YOU'RE GIVING UP DISCOING
FOR ME?

THAT'S RIGHT.

OH, GEORGE, THANKS.

I'LL CALL MR. WENTWORTH.

YOU'RE LEAVING
THE PLAY?

ABSOLUTELY!

I'D RATHER SPEND
MY EVENINGS

WITH MY WONDERFUL,
CONSIDERATE HUSBAND.

OH, SHOOT, WEEZY.
I AIN'T THAT GREAT.

YES, YOU ARE!

NOW MAKE YOURSELF
COMFORTABLE.

I'LL FIX DINNER.

OOH!

WHAT'S WRONG?

NOTHIN'.

EASY!
MY BACK HURTS.

TOO MUCH DISCO DANCING, EH?

QUIET, BENTLEY!

SO THAT'S IT!

YOU'RE JUST STAYING HOME
BECAUSE YOU CAN'T DANCE.

WAIT A MINUTE...

"I'D RATHER STAY HOME
WITH MY WONDERFUL WIFE."

WHAT'S THAT LOOK?

THAT'S A LOOK OF ANGER!

WHERE YOU GOIN'?

I'M LATE
FOR REHEARSAL.

WHAT ABOUT MY BACK?

MR. BENTLEY
WILL BE GLAD TO HELP YOU.

OF COURSE.
PLEASE LIE DOWN.

WHAT ABOUT DINNER?

LET'S SEE.
THREE WEEKS REHEARSAL,
ONE WEEK PERFORMANCE.

IF YOU'RE LUCKY,
YOU'LL GET DINNER
IN FOUR WEEKS.

FOUR WEEKS!

♪ SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE,
SHAKE YOUR BOOTIE ♪

♪ SHAKE YOUR BOOTIE ♪

♪ SHAKE YOUR BOOTIE ♪

♪ SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE ♪♪

THE JEFFERSONS WAS VIDEOTAPED
IN FRONT OF A STUDIO AUDIENCE.

♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪♪