The Jeffersons (1975–1985): Season 4, Episode 13 - George Needs Help - full transcript
Workaholic George neglects Louise, so Tom suggests that George hire a general manager to help ease the load. Florence coaches qualified applicant Clarence on how to schmooze with George and ace the interview.
♪ WELL, WE'RE MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ TO THE EAST SIDE ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ TO A DELUXE APARTMENT ♪
♪ IN THE SKY ♪
♪ WE'RE MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ TO THE EAST SIDE ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ WE FINALLY GOT
A PIECE OF THE PIE ♪
♪ FISH DON'T FRY
IN THE KITCHEN ♪
♪ BEANS DON'T
BURN ON THE GRILL ♪
♪ TOOK A WHOLE LOT OF TRYIN' ♪
♪ JUST TO GET UP THAT HILL ♪
♪ NOW WE'RE UP IN
THE BIG LEAGUES ♪
♪ GETTIN' OUR TURN AT BAT ♪
♪ AS LONG AS WE LIVE ♪
♪ IT'S YOU AND ME, BABY ♪
♪ THERE AIN'T NOTHIN'
WRONG WITH THAT ♪
♪ WE'RE MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ TO THE EAST SIDE ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ TO A DELUXE APARTMENT ♪
♪ IN THE SKY ♪
♪ WE'RE MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ TO THE EAST SIDE ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ WE FINALLY GOT A
PIECE OF THE PIE ♪♪
[SNORING]
GOOD MORNING, FLORENCE.
HAVE YOU SEE WHERE...
SHH!
OH, MY GOD.
HE MUST HAVE BEEN
WORKING ALL NIGHT.
AS USUAL.
AW, LOOK AT THAT.
ISN'T GEORGE CUTE
WHEN HE'S SLEEPING?
HE'S CUTE ANYTIME
HIS MOUTH IS SHUT.
HE JUST STOPPED BEING CUTE.
I GUESS WE SHOULD WAKE HIM UP.
I KNOW HOW TO HANDLE THAT.
SO DO I. HEY, MR. JEFFERSON,
TIME TO GET UP!
WHAT ARE YOU TRYIN' TO
DO, SCARE ME TO DEATH?
THAT WAS FLORENCE. I
WAS TRYING TO BE GENTLE.
NEXT TIME, DON'T BE COMING
AT ME LIKE A VACUUM CLEANER.
WELL, I'M GLAD TO SEE YOU
GOT UP IN A GOOD MOOD.
CUT THE JOKES, WEEZY. FLORENCE,
HOW ABOUT SOME COFFEE?
NOW I GOTTA DO ALL
THIS STUFF TONIGHT.
NOT AGAIN. GEORGE,
YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD.
I LIKE TO WORK LONG
HOURS. I'M BUILT THAT WAY.
IF YOU WORKED THE WAY YOU WERE
BUILT, YOU'D HAVE SHORT HOURS.
WHAT'S BUGGING YOU?
YOUR CLEANERS, THAT'S WHAT.
WE NEVER SPEND TIME
TOGETHER ANYMORE.
DIDN'T WE GO OUT TO
DINNER TWICE LAST WEEK?
WITH A STARCH SALESMAN.
AND, BOY, DID HE GET STIFF.
I'M SERIOUS. YOU'RE SO
WRAPPED UP IN YOUR WORK,
I WONDER IF I'M YOUR
WIFE OR A TAX DEDUCTION.
COME ON. YOU KNOW
THE ANSWER TO THAT.
YOU'RE BOTH.
GEORGE!
JUST KIDDIN'.
WE'LL BE TOGETHER MORE OFTEN.
REALLY, GEORGE?
IF Y'ALL DO THIS IN THE MORNING,
NO TELLING WHAT WILL BE
HAPPENING AT LUNCH TIME.
YOU KNOW THE ONE
NICE THING ABOUT YOU?
WHAT?
SEE? YOU DON'T KNOW EITHER.
I CAN'T WAIT FOR CONEY
ISLAND WEDNESDAY NIGHT.
CONEY ISLAND AIN'T
FOR RICH FOLKS.
WE WEREN'T ALWAYS RICH.
GEORGE PROPOSED TO ME THERE.
EVERY YEAR, WE GO
BACK TO CELEBRATE.
YOU ACTUALLY CELEBRATE THE
NIGHT YOU GOT HOOKED UP WITH HIM?
WE ATE COTTON
CANDY AND HOT DOGS.
WE RODE THE WHIP.
THEN THEY CLOSED
THE WHIP TO CLEAN IT.
WHY?
GEORGE SHOULDN'T EAT
BEFORE RIDING THE WHIP.
WEEZY!
JUNK FOOD AND RIDES
DON'T SOUND ROMANTIC.
WE DID ADD ONE
THING TO THE NIGHT,
BUT ONLY AFTER WE GOT MARRIED.
FLORENCE AIN'T GOT TO KNOW
DETAILS OF OUR PERSONAL LIFE.
I DON'T HEAR NOTHIN' THAT
GOES ON AROUND HERE,
TIGER!
I DIDN'T MEAN TO EMBARRASS YOU.
I'M LOOKING FORWARD
TO CONEY ISLAND.
WE CAN'T GO.
WHAT?
MY STORE MANAGER'S
MEETING IS THAT NIGHT.
WHAT ABOUT ME?
YOU CAN COME, TOO.
[DOORBELL]
I'M NOT GOING TO
CONEY ISLAND BY MYSELF.
TAKE FLORENCE.
MAYBE YOU'LL LOSE HER.
HELLO, HELEN, TOM. COME IN.
WHAT DO YOU WANT?
WE CAME TO SEE LOUISE.
NOW YOU'VE SEEN HER. BYE.
WE'RE GOING TO THE
PARK TO PLAY BADMINTON.
WANT TO COME?
BADMINTON?
IT'S LIKE TENNIS,
EXCEPT YOU HIT A BIRD.
WHY DON'T YOU AND YOUR
BIRD FLY OUT OF HERE?
GEORGE, WILL YOU BE MORE CIVIL?
GEORGE, COME ALONG WITH US.
I GOT TO WORK.
THE WILLISES SPEND
TIME TOGETHER.
THEY GOT TO STAY TOGETHER.
WHO EVER HEARD OF HALF A ZEBRA?
WHO EVER HEARD OF HALF A BRAIN?
BUT YOU MANAGE.
SOUNDS LIKE WE
WALKED INTO A FIGHT.
YOU'RE DARN RIGHT YOU DID.
SUPPOSE YOU ALWAYS CELEBRATED
THE NIGHT TOM PROPOSED,
BUT THIS YEAR YOU CAN'T
BECAUSE HE'S TOO BUSY.
I'D SAY HE WAS A STUBBORN,
SELFISH, NO-GOOD JACKASS.
YOU'D SAY THAT TO ME?
I'D SAY THAT TO GEORGE.
WE CELEBRATE THE NIGHT
WE TOLD OUR PARENTS
WE WERE GETTING MARRIED.
WE CALL IT GUNFIGHT
AT THE O.K. CORRAL.
SOME FIGHT. EVERYBODY LOST.
YOU KNOW WHAT YOUR TROUBLE IS?
YEAH. NOSY NEIGHBORS.
YOU'RE CARRYING THE SAME
RESPONSIBILITIES FOR SEVEN STORES
THAT YOU USED TO CARRY FOR ONE.
GEORGE, YOU'RE ONLY HUMAN.
ALL THE VOTES
AREN'T IN ON THAT ONE.
TOM'S ABSOLUTELY RIGHT, GEORGE.
HE AIN'T RIGHT ABOUT NOTHIN'.
BIG BUSINESSES DON'T
RUN LIKE SMALL ONES.
DO WHAT OTHER BIG BUSINESSES DO.
I AIN'T RICH ENOUGH
TO BRIBE A SENATOR.
NO. HIRE A GENERAL MANAGER
TO TAKE SOME OF THE
WORK OFF YOUR SHOULDERS.
GEORGE, THAT'S THE ANSWER.
THAT'S A WONDERFUL IDEA.
I THINK IT STINKS.
WHY?
BECAUSE HE THOUGHT OF IT.
THEY ALL LAUGHED AT HENRY FORD.
ONLY WHEN HE PARDONED NIXON.
I'M JUST OFFERING ADVICE.
I DON'T NEED YOUR ADVICE.
YOU'VE GOT TO RELAX.
COME AND PLAY BADMINTON WITH US.
IT'S A BEAUTIFUL DAY.
JUST SMELL THAT FRESH AIR.
I DON'T WANT TO PLAY
YOUR STUPID GAME.
AFRAID IT'S TOO HARD?
YOU JUST HIT THIS STUPID THING.
OH, MY GOD!
LOOK OUT DOWN THERE!
NO! NO! OH!
A BUS RAN OVER MY BIRD!
WATCH IT UNTIL AN
AMBULANCE COMES.
I FINALLY GOT RID OF HIM.
THAT WASN'T VERY NICE, GEORGE.
COME ON, HELEN.
YOU OWE ME A BIRD.
OK.
HOW COULD YOU DO THAT?
IT SERVES HIM RIGHT
FOR INTERFERING.
HE MEANT WELL.
YOU SHOULD HIRE A
GENERAL MANAGER.
NO.
YOU THINK NO ONE CAN DO YOUR JOB
AS WELL AS YOU CAN.
BINGO!
HOLD IT, GEORGE.
I'M NOT THROUGH WITH YOU.
DON'T YOU SEE WHAT YOUR
SUCCESS HAS MADE US?
RICH PEOPLE.
NO. RICH STRANGERS.
IT'S ALL FOR YOU.
WHO WANTS A FANCY APARTMENT?
YOU.
WHO WANTS TO BE IN HIGH SOCIETY?
YOU.
WHO WANTS ALL THE
SPENDING MONEY IN THE WORLD?
ME!
STAY OUT OF THIS.
I CAN TALK. THIS AIN'T
UNCLE TOM'S CABIN.
THIS IS UNCLE
GEORGE'S CONDOMINIUM,
AND I'M TELLING YOU TO SHUT UP.
I'M THROUGH SHARING
YOU WITH YOUR BUSINESS.
HIRE A GENERAL MANAGER.
THERE'S NOBODY QUALIFIED.
WHAT ABOUT CLARENCE MARTIN?
WHO?
HE MANAGES YOUR BROOKLYN STORE.
YOU SAY HE'S A GOOD WORKER.
I LIE.
CALL CLARENCE.
HE'S PERFECT FOR THE JOB.
I DO THE HIRING. YOU
DO THE BUTTING OUT.
GEORGE!
THIS DISCUSSION IS FINISHED.
NOT QUITE.
YOU'RE MISSING CONEY ISLAND.
NEXT YEAR, IT'LL BE
OUR ANNIVERSARY.
SOON, YOU'LL BE LIVING
IN YOUR DAMN STORES.
I AIN'T LISTENING.
YOU HAD BETTER LISTEN
BECAUSE I'M YOUR WIFE.
I HAVE MY RIGHTS.
YOU WILL HIRE A GENERAL MANAGER.
WHEN HELL FREEZES OVER.
THEN GRAB YOUR OVERCOAT, BUSTER.
IT WILL BE COLDER THAN THAT
IN OUR BEDROOM TONIGHT.
WEEZY...
AND I MEAN COLD.
FLORENCE, HOW ABOUT
AN EGG SALAD SANDWICH?
NO, THANKS. I ALREADY ATE.
I MEAN FOR ME. I SAW
A BOWL OF IT IN THERE.
YOU BETTER LOOK AGAIN,
'CAUSE THAT'S WHAT I ATE.
GIVE ME SOME OF THAT LEFTOVER
TURKEY. THAT SHOULD MAKE A GOOD SNACK.
IT SURE DID.
YOU ATE THAT TOO?
HOW CAN I WORK IF I DON'T EAT?
HOW CAN YOU WORK
IF ALL YOU DO IS EAT?
THERE'S A CAN OF
SARDINES IN THE CUPBOARD.
I HATE SARDINES.
ME TOO. THAT'S WHY
THEY STILL IN THERE.
OH, FLORENCE. GOOD.
THIS SHOULD GO
IN THE OVEN AT 5:00.
OKAY. I WOULDN'T GO IN THERE.
MR. JEFFERSON'S GOING
OVER THE ANSWERS TO HIS AD.
IS HE IN A BAD MOOD?
DOES SAMMY DAVIS GOT JEWELRY?
WELL, THAT'S TOO BAD,
BUT GEORGE IS JUST GONNA
HAVE TO LIVE THROUGH IT.
HELLO, GEORGE, SWEETHEART.
LOOK AT THE ANSWERS THAT
NEWSPAPER AD BROUGHT IN ONE WEEK.
HOW'S IT GOING?
LOUSY.
IF THESE PEOPLE READ OUR PAPER,
I'M CANCELING MY SUBSCRIPTION.
IT CAN'T BE THAT BAD.
YOU'VE SORTED IT INTO PILES.
REJECTS, FORGET
IT, NOT QUALIFIED.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
YOU'RE MAKING IT HARD.
I ALREADY OPENED MORE
LETTERS THAN THE C.I.A.
HELLO, MR. BENTLEY.
SORRY TO BARGE IN.
I HAD TO SHOW
SOMEONE WHAT I MADE.
WHAT?
THIS.
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
CHANGE LIQUOR STORES.
THERE'S A BOAT IN THAT BOTTLE.
I PUT IT THERE.
MR. BENTLEY, THAT'S BEAUTIFUL.
IT TOOK HOURS OF WORK.
DO YOU RECOGNIZE IT?
IT'S A SCOTCH BOTTLE.
NO, IT'S THE SANTA MARIA.
COLUMBUS CROSSED
THE OCEAN IN THIS BOAT.
I THOUGHT COLUMBUS
WAS MUCH TALLER.
I'M BUSY RIGHT NOW.
GEORGE RAN AN AD FOR
A GENERAL MANAGER.
YOU COULD USE A MAN FRIDAY.
SATURDAY IS
BUSIEST IN THE STORE.
BE CAREFUL ABOUT THE AD.
I PLACED ONE ONCE.
IT'S AN INTERESTING STORY.
SO FAR IT AIN'T.
I WAS SELLING A WELSH
MOTHER-OF-PEARL SNUFFBOX.
THE NEWSPAPER MADE A
TYPOGRAPHICAL ERROR.
MY AD READ, "FOR SALE,
ONE WOTSULNGBEMGIBFFX."
THAT'S RIDICULOUS!
THE AD GOT A RESPONSE.
A MAN CLAIMED THAT HE
OWNED A WOTSULNGBEMGIBFFX,
AND HE WANTED TO
MATE IT WITH MINE.
WEREN'T YOU LEAVING, BENTLEY?
YES, I AM.
MY UNCLE WILLARD WORKED
WITH NEWSPAPERS ALL HIS LIFE.
WHAT DOES HE DO?
HE WRAPS FISH IN THEM.
HE'S WEIRD!
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
I FIND IT HARD TO BELIEVE
YOU CAN'T FIND ONE
QUALIFIED PERSON.
I CAN'T, SO GET OUT OF THERE.
THIS MAN HAS EXPERIENCE.
WHAT'S WRONG WITH HIM?
HE'S TOO FAT.
HOW DO YOU KNOW HE'S FAT?
THERE'S KETCHUP
STAINS ON THE LETTER.
HE'S TOO SLOPPY.
YOU'RE IMPOSSIBLE!
THERE'S NOBODY GOOD ENOUGH.
YOU DON'T INTEND TO COOPERATE.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
FLORENCE, GET THE DOOR.
I'M TALKING TO YOU!
THE WHOLE BUILDING KNOWS THAT.
WHOEVER THIS IS,
I HOPE THEY BROUGHT EARMUFFS.
FOR ME, TOO.
HELLO, THERE.
HOW YOU DOIN' MR. JEFFERSON,
MRS. JEFFERSON?
HELLO, CLARENCE.
WHY AIN'T YOU IN
THE BROOKLYN STORE?
MY ASSISTANT CAN HANDLE THAT.
I GOT THIS PHONE CALL
SAYING YOU'RE HIRING
A GENERAL MANAGER.
PHONE CALL?
I TOLD YOU TO STAY
OUT OF MY BUSINESS.
I HAD FLORENCE CALL.
TRAITOR.
WELL, WELL, WELL.
I KNEW THAT VOICE
BELONGED TO ONE LOVELY LADY.
YOU DON'T MEAN THAT.
TALK TO ME ABOUT BUSINESS.
HE CAN TALK TO WHO HE WANTS.
WHAT WERE YOU SAYING?
ANYONE TOLD YOU YOU
HAVE BEAUTIFUL EYES?
GO RIGHT AHEAD, CHILD.
THE TRUTH SHALL SET YOU FREE.
CLARENCE CAME TO TALK BUSINESS.
YOU GET OUT OR BE QUIET.
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.
YOU WON'T HEAR
ANOTHER WORD FROM ME.
MY LIPS ARE GLUED SHUT.
TRY USING CEMENT.
I WANT THIS JOB.
YOU WON'T GET IT.
ANYBODY DUMB
ENOUGH TO WANT THE JOB
IS TOO DUMB TO BE
GENERAL MANAGER.
I'LL GET THE JOB
IF I DON'T WANT IT?
RIGHT.
I DON'T WANT THE JOB.
YOU AIN'T GETTIN' IT.
GEORGE!
IT'S A LOUSY JOB.
EXTRA-HARD WORK.
YOU'LL NEVER SEE YOUR FAMILY.
THE PAY STINKS.
I KNOW. I WORK FOR YOU ALREADY.
CLARENCE CAME OVER HERE.
HE'S OBVIOUSLY QUALIFIED.
GIVE HIM THE JOB.
IS HE QUALIFIED?
TRY ME, MR. JEFFERSON.
THE QUEENS GENERATOR BLOWS OUT.
WHAT DO YOU DO?
I SWITCH TO THE K-150.
YOU HEAR THAT?
K-150.
WHAT IS THE K-150?
AN AUXILIARY GENERATOR.
ANY MORE QUESTIONS, GEORGE?
LUCKY GUESS.
CLARENCE GETS THE JOB?
HE AIN'T EXECUTIVE MATERIAL.
WHAT?
MY GENERAL MANAGER HAS TO
REPRESENT ALL MY CLEANERS.
HE LOOKS LIKE HE
NEEDS CLEANING HIMSELF.
A TRUCK SPLASHED ME.
THIS OUTFIT IS NEW.
WHAT'S GOING ON?
YOU AIN'T A GOOD WORKER.
AIN'T NO GOOD WORKER?
YOU'RE MAD BECAUSE I
KNEW ABOUT THE K-150.
YOU WON'T ADMIT YOUR MISTAKE.
I HIRE MY MISTAKES.
WHAT'S GOING DOWN HERE?
THE ELEVATOR. USE IT.
THAT CUTS IT.
THAT'S THE END OF IT.
I'LL TELL YOU WHAT
I THINK OF YOU.
IF I HAVE FAULTS, TELL ME.
TAKE THIS CHAIR. THIS
SHOULDN'T TAKE BUT A YEAR.
YOU HEAR THAT, WEEZY?
I'M NOT THROUGH
TELLING YOU WHAT I THINK.
NICE JOB INTERVIEW.
GEORGE, LET'S TALK.
NO.
YES!
YOU ALMOST KILLED ME.
YOU WERE UNFAIR TO CLARENCE.
APOLOGIZE TO HIM.
NO.
OK.
YOU'D BE BETTER OFF...
SORRY TO INTERRUPT.
GO RIGHT AHEAD.
DON'T MIND ME.
IT'S A FAMILY MATTER.
NOTHING REALLY.
SORRY.
WHAT IS THAT?
YOUR OVERCOAT. YOU'RE
WEARING IT TO BED TONIGHT.
YOU'RE RIGHT. I
HANDLED HIM ALL WRONG.
I LOST MY HEAD.
THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING.
NOBODY CAN OUTYELL
MR. JEFFERSON.
HE'S GOT MORE MOUTH THAN
A DENTIST CAN SEE IN A YEAR.
HOW CAN I DEAL WITH HIM?
I KNOW HOW.
REMEMBER THE STORY OF THE
ALLIGATOR AND THE BUNNIES?
MY LIBRARY CARD EXPIRED.
TWO BUNNIES WANTED
TO CROSS THE RIVER.
ONLY THE ALLIGATOR
COULD SWIM THAT FAR.
THE FIRST BUNNY TRIED TO FORCE
THE ALLIGATOR TO TAKE HIM ACROSS.
HE SAID, "LET'S
GO, LUGGAGE LIPS."
BUT THE ALLIGATOR
DIDN'T LIKE THAT.
THE ALLIGATOR SAID, "YOUR MAMA."
THE SECOND BUNNY SAID
NICE THINGS TO THE ALLIGATOR.
"YOU ARE A GOOD SWIMMER."
"I HOPE THEY DON'T
MAKE SHOES OUT OF YOU."
THE ALLIGATOR TOOK
HIM ACROSS THE RIVER.
SEE WHAT I'M SAYING?
I GOT TO BE A
SMART BUNNY RABBIT.
YOU INSULTED THAT MAN.
GO OUT AND APOLOGIZE.
I CAN'T.
GO!
I WANT TO SAY SOMETHING.
I JUST WANT TO SAY
THAT I APOLOGIZE.
I DON'T THINK HE HEARD YOU.
I SAID...
MR. JEFFERSON, I LOST MY TEMPER.
WILL YOU ACCEPT MY APOLOGY?
WELL, SURE, WHY NOT?
WHEN I'M WRONG, I'M
ALWAYS FIRST TO APOLOGIZE.
I WANTED THE JOB TOO MUCH.
I WANT TO WORK WITH YOU.
YOU THE BEST.
TRUE.
IMAGINE BEING TAUGHT
THE CLEANING BUSINESS
BY THE MASTER,
MR. GEORGE JEFFERSON.
ONLY A FOOL WOULD PASS THAT UP.
I'D DO ANYTHING
TO LEARN FROM YOU.
THIS GUY'S STARTING
TO MAKE SENSE.
BUT YOU DON'T WANT ME.
WHERE YOU GOIN'?
JUST WALKING AROUND, THINKING.
MY GENERAL MANAGER
DON'T START OFF LIKE THAT.
I GOT THE JOB?
EITHER THAT OR I
DON'T GET NO PEACE.
YOU CAN SAY THAT AGAIN.
YOU'LL NEVER REGRET THIS.
I'LL HANDLE ALL
YOUR BOOKKEEPING,
YOUR PAYROLL, YOUR SUPPLIES...
YOU CAN RUN THE MEETING TONIGHT
WHILE MR. JEFFERSON
AND I GO TO CONEY ISLAND.
DON'T WORRY. I CAN
HANDLE EVERYTHING.
WE'LL SEE.
NOW THAT I'M AN EXECUTIVE,
ABOUT MY SALARY...
LESSON ONE FROM THE MASTER...
AN EXECUTIVE NEVER
TALKS ABOUT MONEY.
BYE, MR. JEFFERSON,
MRS. JEFFERSON.
OH.
FLORENCE, THANK
YOU FOR THAT TIP.
THIS BUNNY REALLY
PLAYED THAT OLD ALLIGATOR.
WORKS EVERY TIME.
WHAT HAPPENED TO THAT BUNNY
WHEN HE GOT ACROSS THE RIVER?
THE ALLIGATOR ATE HIM.
YEAH.
I'M SO PROUD OF YOU.
YOU HIRED YOUR FIRST
GENERAL MANAGER.
I DID, DIDN'T I?
HE'LL TALK TO THE SUPPLIERS.
HE'LL DEAL WITH THE ACCOUNTANTS.
HE'LL HANDLE THE EMPLOYEES.
WHAT'LL I DO?
ANYTHING YOU WANT.
YOU'VE GOT FREE TIME.
FREE TIME.
YOUR DAYS WILL BE YOUR OWN.
FREE TIME.
THIS IS THE GREATEST
IDEA YOU EVER HAD.
DO YOU REALLY THINK SO?
WHILE CLARENCE
DOES MY DIRTY WORK,
I'LL DO MORE IMPORTANT THINGS.
LIKE WHAT, GEORGE?
OPENING UP NEW STORES.
JUST KIDDING, WEEZY.
♪♪ [HUMMING]
[WOMAN] THE JEFFERSONS WAS
VIDEOTAPED IN FRONT OF A STUDIO AUDIENCE.
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ TO THE EAST SIDE ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ TO A DELUXE APARTMENT ♪
♪ IN THE SKY ♪
♪ WE'RE MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ TO THE EAST SIDE ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ WE FINALLY GOT
A PIECE OF THE PIE ♪
♪ FISH DON'T FRY
IN THE KITCHEN ♪
♪ BEANS DON'T
BURN ON THE GRILL ♪
♪ TOOK A WHOLE LOT OF TRYIN' ♪
♪ JUST TO GET UP THAT HILL ♪
♪ NOW WE'RE UP IN
THE BIG LEAGUES ♪
♪ GETTIN' OUR TURN AT BAT ♪
♪ AS LONG AS WE LIVE ♪
♪ IT'S YOU AND ME, BABY ♪
♪ THERE AIN'T NOTHIN'
WRONG WITH THAT ♪
♪ WE'RE MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ TO THE EAST SIDE ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ TO A DELUXE APARTMENT ♪
♪ IN THE SKY ♪
♪ WE'RE MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ TO THE EAST SIDE ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ WE FINALLY GOT A
PIECE OF THE PIE ♪♪
[SNORING]
GOOD MORNING, FLORENCE.
HAVE YOU SEE WHERE...
SHH!
OH, MY GOD.
HE MUST HAVE BEEN
WORKING ALL NIGHT.
AS USUAL.
AW, LOOK AT THAT.
ISN'T GEORGE CUTE
WHEN HE'S SLEEPING?
HE'S CUTE ANYTIME
HIS MOUTH IS SHUT.
HE JUST STOPPED BEING CUTE.
I GUESS WE SHOULD WAKE HIM UP.
I KNOW HOW TO HANDLE THAT.
SO DO I. HEY, MR. JEFFERSON,
TIME TO GET UP!
WHAT ARE YOU TRYIN' TO
DO, SCARE ME TO DEATH?
THAT WAS FLORENCE. I
WAS TRYING TO BE GENTLE.
NEXT TIME, DON'T BE COMING
AT ME LIKE A VACUUM CLEANER.
WELL, I'M GLAD TO SEE YOU
GOT UP IN A GOOD MOOD.
CUT THE JOKES, WEEZY. FLORENCE,
HOW ABOUT SOME COFFEE?
NOW I GOTTA DO ALL
THIS STUFF TONIGHT.
NOT AGAIN. GEORGE,
YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD.
I LIKE TO WORK LONG
HOURS. I'M BUILT THAT WAY.
IF YOU WORKED THE WAY YOU WERE
BUILT, YOU'D HAVE SHORT HOURS.
WHAT'S BUGGING YOU?
YOUR CLEANERS, THAT'S WHAT.
WE NEVER SPEND TIME
TOGETHER ANYMORE.
DIDN'T WE GO OUT TO
DINNER TWICE LAST WEEK?
WITH A STARCH SALESMAN.
AND, BOY, DID HE GET STIFF.
I'M SERIOUS. YOU'RE SO
WRAPPED UP IN YOUR WORK,
I WONDER IF I'M YOUR
WIFE OR A TAX DEDUCTION.
COME ON. YOU KNOW
THE ANSWER TO THAT.
YOU'RE BOTH.
GEORGE!
JUST KIDDIN'.
WE'LL BE TOGETHER MORE OFTEN.
REALLY, GEORGE?
IF Y'ALL DO THIS IN THE MORNING,
NO TELLING WHAT WILL BE
HAPPENING AT LUNCH TIME.
YOU KNOW THE ONE
NICE THING ABOUT YOU?
WHAT?
SEE? YOU DON'T KNOW EITHER.
I CAN'T WAIT FOR CONEY
ISLAND WEDNESDAY NIGHT.
CONEY ISLAND AIN'T
FOR RICH FOLKS.
WE WEREN'T ALWAYS RICH.
GEORGE PROPOSED TO ME THERE.
EVERY YEAR, WE GO
BACK TO CELEBRATE.
YOU ACTUALLY CELEBRATE THE
NIGHT YOU GOT HOOKED UP WITH HIM?
WE ATE COTTON
CANDY AND HOT DOGS.
WE RODE THE WHIP.
THEN THEY CLOSED
THE WHIP TO CLEAN IT.
WHY?
GEORGE SHOULDN'T EAT
BEFORE RIDING THE WHIP.
WEEZY!
JUNK FOOD AND RIDES
DON'T SOUND ROMANTIC.
WE DID ADD ONE
THING TO THE NIGHT,
BUT ONLY AFTER WE GOT MARRIED.
FLORENCE AIN'T GOT TO KNOW
DETAILS OF OUR PERSONAL LIFE.
I DON'T HEAR NOTHIN' THAT
GOES ON AROUND HERE,
TIGER!
I DIDN'T MEAN TO EMBARRASS YOU.
I'M LOOKING FORWARD
TO CONEY ISLAND.
WE CAN'T GO.
WHAT?
MY STORE MANAGER'S
MEETING IS THAT NIGHT.
WHAT ABOUT ME?
YOU CAN COME, TOO.
[DOORBELL]
I'M NOT GOING TO
CONEY ISLAND BY MYSELF.
TAKE FLORENCE.
MAYBE YOU'LL LOSE HER.
HELLO, HELEN, TOM. COME IN.
WHAT DO YOU WANT?
WE CAME TO SEE LOUISE.
NOW YOU'VE SEEN HER. BYE.
WE'RE GOING TO THE
PARK TO PLAY BADMINTON.
WANT TO COME?
BADMINTON?
IT'S LIKE TENNIS,
EXCEPT YOU HIT A BIRD.
WHY DON'T YOU AND YOUR
BIRD FLY OUT OF HERE?
GEORGE, WILL YOU BE MORE CIVIL?
GEORGE, COME ALONG WITH US.
I GOT TO WORK.
THE WILLISES SPEND
TIME TOGETHER.
THEY GOT TO STAY TOGETHER.
WHO EVER HEARD OF HALF A ZEBRA?
WHO EVER HEARD OF HALF A BRAIN?
BUT YOU MANAGE.
SOUNDS LIKE WE
WALKED INTO A FIGHT.
YOU'RE DARN RIGHT YOU DID.
SUPPOSE YOU ALWAYS CELEBRATED
THE NIGHT TOM PROPOSED,
BUT THIS YEAR YOU CAN'T
BECAUSE HE'S TOO BUSY.
I'D SAY HE WAS A STUBBORN,
SELFISH, NO-GOOD JACKASS.
YOU'D SAY THAT TO ME?
I'D SAY THAT TO GEORGE.
WE CELEBRATE THE NIGHT
WE TOLD OUR PARENTS
WE WERE GETTING MARRIED.
WE CALL IT GUNFIGHT
AT THE O.K. CORRAL.
SOME FIGHT. EVERYBODY LOST.
YOU KNOW WHAT YOUR TROUBLE IS?
YEAH. NOSY NEIGHBORS.
YOU'RE CARRYING THE SAME
RESPONSIBILITIES FOR SEVEN STORES
THAT YOU USED TO CARRY FOR ONE.
GEORGE, YOU'RE ONLY HUMAN.
ALL THE VOTES
AREN'T IN ON THAT ONE.
TOM'S ABSOLUTELY RIGHT, GEORGE.
HE AIN'T RIGHT ABOUT NOTHIN'.
BIG BUSINESSES DON'T
RUN LIKE SMALL ONES.
DO WHAT OTHER BIG BUSINESSES DO.
I AIN'T RICH ENOUGH
TO BRIBE A SENATOR.
NO. HIRE A GENERAL MANAGER
TO TAKE SOME OF THE
WORK OFF YOUR SHOULDERS.
GEORGE, THAT'S THE ANSWER.
THAT'S A WONDERFUL IDEA.
I THINK IT STINKS.
WHY?
BECAUSE HE THOUGHT OF IT.
THEY ALL LAUGHED AT HENRY FORD.
ONLY WHEN HE PARDONED NIXON.
I'M JUST OFFERING ADVICE.
I DON'T NEED YOUR ADVICE.
YOU'VE GOT TO RELAX.
COME AND PLAY BADMINTON WITH US.
IT'S A BEAUTIFUL DAY.
JUST SMELL THAT FRESH AIR.
I DON'T WANT TO PLAY
YOUR STUPID GAME.
AFRAID IT'S TOO HARD?
YOU JUST HIT THIS STUPID THING.
OH, MY GOD!
LOOK OUT DOWN THERE!
NO! NO! OH!
A BUS RAN OVER MY BIRD!
WATCH IT UNTIL AN
AMBULANCE COMES.
I FINALLY GOT RID OF HIM.
THAT WASN'T VERY NICE, GEORGE.
COME ON, HELEN.
YOU OWE ME A BIRD.
OK.
HOW COULD YOU DO THAT?
IT SERVES HIM RIGHT
FOR INTERFERING.
HE MEANT WELL.
YOU SHOULD HIRE A
GENERAL MANAGER.
NO.
YOU THINK NO ONE CAN DO YOUR JOB
AS WELL AS YOU CAN.
BINGO!
HOLD IT, GEORGE.
I'M NOT THROUGH WITH YOU.
DON'T YOU SEE WHAT YOUR
SUCCESS HAS MADE US?
RICH PEOPLE.
NO. RICH STRANGERS.
IT'S ALL FOR YOU.
WHO WANTS A FANCY APARTMENT?
YOU.
WHO WANTS TO BE IN HIGH SOCIETY?
YOU.
WHO WANTS ALL THE
SPENDING MONEY IN THE WORLD?
ME!
STAY OUT OF THIS.
I CAN TALK. THIS AIN'T
UNCLE TOM'S CABIN.
THIS IS UNCLE
GEORGE'S CONDOMINIUM,
AND I'M TELLING YOU TO SHUT UP.
I'M THROUGH SHARING
YOU WITH YOUR BUSINESS.
HIRE A GENERAL MANAGER.
THERE'S NOBODY QUALIFIED.
WHAT ABOUT CLARENCE MARTIN?
WHO?
HE MANAGES YOUR BROOKLYN STORE.
YOU SAY HE'S A GOOD WORKER.
I LIE.
CALL CLARENCE.
HE'S PERFECT FOR THE JOB.
I DO THE HIRING. YOU
DO THE BUTTING OUT.
GEORGE!
THIS DISCUSSION IS FINISHED.
NOT QUITE.
YOU'RE MISSING CONEY ISLAND.
NEXT YEAR, IT'LL BE
OUR ANNIVERSARY.
SOON, YOU'LL BE LIVING
IN YOUR DAMN STORES.
I AIN'T LISTENING.
YOU HAD BETTER LISTEN
BECAUSE I'M YOUR WIFE.
I HAVE MY RIGHTS.
YOU WILL HIRE A GENERAL MANAGER.
WHEN HELL FREEZES OVER.
THEN GRAB YOUR OVERCOAT, BUSTER.
IT WILL BE COLDER THAN THAT
IN OUR BEDROOM TONIGHT.
WEEZY...
AND I MEAN COLD.
FLORENCE, HOW ABOUT
AN EGG SALAD SANDWICH?
NO, THANKS. I ALREADY ATE.
I MEAN FOR ME. I SAW
A BOWL OF IT IN THERE.
YOU BETTER LOOK AGAIN,
'CAUSE THAT'S WHAT I ATE.
GIVE ME SOME OF THAT LEFTOVER
TURKEY. THAT SHOULD MAKE A GOOD SNACK.
IT SURE DID.
YOU ATE THAT TOO?
HOW CAN I WORK IF I DON'T EAT?
HOW CAN YOU WORK
IF ALL YOU DO IS EAT?
THERE'S A CAN OF
SARDINES IN THE CUPBOARD.
I HATE SARDINES.
ME TOO. THAT'S WHY
THEY STILL IN THERE.
OH, FLORENCE. GOOD.
THIS SHOULD GO
IN THE OVEN AT 5:00.
OKAY. I WOULDN'T GO IN THERE.
MR. JEFFERSON'S GOING
OVER THE ANSWERS TO HIS AD.
IS HE IN A BAD MOOD?
DOES SAMMY DAVIS GOT JEWELRY?
WELL, THAT'S TOO BAD,
BUT GEORGE IS JUST GONNA
HAVE TO LIVE THROUGH IT.
HELLO, GEORGE, SWEETHEART.
LOOK AT THE ANSWERS THAT
NEWSPAPER AD BROUGHT IN ONE WEEK.
HOW'S IT GOING?
LOUSY.
IF THESE PEOPLE READ OUR PAPER,
I'M CANCELING MY SUBSCRIPTION.
IT CAN'T BE THAT BAD.
YOU'VE SORTED IT INTO PILES.
REJECTS, FORGET
IT, NOT QUALIFIED.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
YOU'RE MAKING IT HARD.
I ALREADY OPENED MORE
LETTERS THAN THE C.I.A.
HELLO, MR. BENTLEY.
SORRY TO BARGE IN.
I HAD TO SHOW
SOMEONE WHAT I MADE.
WHAT?
THIS.
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
CHANGE LIQUOR STORES.
THERE'S A BOAT IN THAT BOTTLE.
I PUT IT THERE.
MR. BENTLEY, THAT'S BEAUTIFUL.
IT TOOK HOURS OF WORK.
DO YOU RECOGNIZE IT?
IT'S A SCOTCH BOTTLE.
NO, IT'S THE SANTA MARIA.
COLUMBUS CROSSED
THE OCEAN IN THIS BOAT.
I THOUGHT COLUMBUS
WAS MUCH TALLER.
I'M BUSY RIGHT NOW.
GEORGE RAN AN AD FOR
A GENERAL MANAGER.
YOU COULD USE A MAN FRIDAY.
SATURDAY IS
BUSIEST IN THE STORE.
BE CAREFUL ABOUT THE AD.
I PLACED ONE ONCE.
IT'S AN INTERESTING STORY.
SO FAR IT AIN'T.
I WAS SELLING A WELSH
MOTHER-OF-PEARL SNUFFBOX.
THE NEWSPAPER MADE A
TYPOGRAPHICAL ERROR.
MY AD READ, "FOR SALE,
ONE WOTSULNGBEMGIBFFX."
THAT'S RIDICULOUS!
THE AD GOT A RESPONSE.
A MAN CLAIMED THAT HE
OWNED A WOTSULNGBEMGIBFFX,
AND HE WANTED TO
MATE IT WITH MINE.
WEREN'T YOU LEAVING, BENTLEY?
YES, I AM.
MY UNCLE WILLARD WORKED
WITH NEWSPAPERS ALL HIS LIFE.
WHAT DOES HE DO?
HE WRAPS FISH IN THEM.
HE'S WEIRD!
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
I FIND IT HARD TO BELIEVE
YOU CAN'T FIND ONE
QUALIFIED PERSON.
I CAN'T, SO GET OUT OF THERE.
THIS MAN HAS EXPERIENCE.
WHAT'S WRONG WITH HIM?
HE'S TOO FAT.
HOW DO YOU KNOW HE'S FAT?
THERE'S KETCHUP
STAINS ON THE LETTER.
HE'S TOO SLOPPY.
YOU'RE IMPOSSIBLE!
THERE'S NOBODY GOOD ENOUGH.
YOU DON'T INTEND TO COOPERATE.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
FLORENCE, GET THE DOOR.
I'M TALKING TO YOU!
THE WHOLE BUILDING KNOWS THAT.
WHOEVER THIS IS,
I HOPE THEY BROUGHT EARMUFFS.
FOR ME, TOO.
HELLO, THERE.
HOW YOU DOIN' MR. JEFFERSON,
MRS. JEFFERSON?
HELLO, CLARENCE.
WHY AIN'T YOU IN
THE BROOKLYN STORE?
MY ASSISTANT CAN HANDLE THAT.
I GOT THIS PHONE CALL
SAYING YOU'RE HIRING
A GENERAL MANAGER.
PHONE CALL?
I TOLD YOU TO STAY
OUT OF MY BUSINESS.
I HAD FLORENCE CALL.
TRAITOR.
WELL, WELL, WELL.
I KNEW THAT VOICE
BELONGED TO ONE LOVELY LADY.
YOU DON'T MEAN THAT.
TALK TO ME ABOUT BUSINESS.
HE CAN TALK TO WHO HE WANTS.
WHAT WERE YOU SAYING?
ANYONE TOLD YOU YOU
HAVE BEAUTIFUL EYES?
GO RIGHT AHEAD, CHILD.
THE TRUTH SHALL SET YOU FREE.
CLARENCE CAME TO TALK BUSINESS.
YOU GET OUT OR BE QUIET.
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.
YOU WON'T HEAR
ANOTHER WORD FROM ME.
MY LIPS ARE GLUED SHUT.
TRY USING CEMENT.
I WANT THIS JOB.
YOU WON'T GET IT.
ANYBODY DUMB
ENOUGH TO WANT THE JOB
IS TOO DUMB TO BE
GENERAL MANAGER.
I'LL GET THE JOB
IF I DON'T WANT IT?
RIGHT.
I DON'T WANT THE JOB.
YOU AIN'T GETTIN' IT.
GEORGE!
IT'S A LOUSY JOB.
EXTRA-HARD WORK.
YOU'LL NEVER SEE YOUR FAMILY.
THE PAY STINKS.
I KNOW. I WORK FOR YOU ALREADY.
CLARENCE CAME OVER HERE.
HE'S OBVIOUSLY QUALIFIED.
GIVE HIM THE JOB.
IS HE QUALIFIED?
TRY ME, MR. JEFFERSON.
THE QUEENS GENERATOR BLOWS OUT.
WHAT DO YOU DO?
I SWITCH TO THE K-150.
YOU HEAR THAT?
K-150.
WHAT IS THE K-150?
AN AUXILIARY GENERATOR.
ANY MORE QUESTIONS, GEORGE?
LUCKY GUESS.
CLARENCE GETS THE JOB?
HE AIN'T EXECUTIVE MATERIAL.
WHAT?
MY GENERAL MANAGER HAS TO
REPRESENT ALL MY CLEANERS.
HE LOOKS LIKE HE
NEEDS CLEANING HIMSELF.
A TRUCK SPLASHED ME.
THIS OUTFIT IS NEW.
WHAT'S GOING ON?
YOU AIN'T A GOOD WORKER.
AIN'T NO GOOD WORKER?
YOU'RE MAD BECAUSE I
KNEW ABOUT THE K-150.
YOU WON'T ADMIT YOUR MISTAKE.
I HIRE MY MISTAKES.
WHAT'S GOING DOWN HERE?
THE ELEVATOR. USE IT.
THAT CUTS IT.
THAT'S THE END OF IT.
I'LL TELL YOU WHAT
I THINK OF YOU.
IF I HAVE FAULTS, TELL ME.
TAKE THIS CHAIR. THIS
SHOULDN'T TAKE BUT A YEAR.
YOU HEAR THAT, WEEZY?
I'M NOT THROUGH
TELLING YOU WHAT I THINK.
NICE JOB INTERVIEW.
GEORGE, LET'S TALK.
NO.
YES!
YOU ALMOST KILLED ME.
YOU WERE UNFAIR TO CLARENCE.
APOLOGIZE TO HIM.
NO.
OK.
YOU'D BE BETTER OFF...
SORRY TO INTERRUPT.
GO RIGHT AHEAD.
DON'T MIND ME.
IT'S A FAMILY MATTER.
NOTHING REALLY.
SORRY.
WHAT IS THAT?
YOUR OVERCOAT. YOU'RE
WEARING IT TO BED TONIGHT.
YOU'RE RIGHT. I
HANDLED HIM ALL WRONG.
I LOST MY HEAD.
THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING.
NOBODY CAN OUTYELL
MR. JEFFERSON.
HE'S GOT MORE MOUTH THAN
A DENTIST CAN SEE IN A YEAR.
HOW CAN I DEAL WITH HIM?
I KNOW HOW.
REMEMBER THE STORY OF THE
ALLIGATOR AND THE BUNNIES?
MY LIBRARY CARD EXPIRED.
TWO BUNNIES WANTED
TO CROSS THE RIVER.
ONLY THE ALLIGATOR
COULD SWIM THAT FAR.
THE FIRST BUNNY TRIED TO FORCE
THE ALLIGATOR TO TAKE HIM ACROSS.
HE SAID, "LET'S
GO, LUGGAGE LIPS."
BUT THE ALLIGATOR
DIDN'T LIKE THAT.
THE ALLIGATOR SAID, "YOUR MAMA."
THE SECOND BUNNY SAID
NICE THINGS TO THE ALLIGATOR.
"YOU ARE A GOOD SWIMMER."
"I HOPE THEY DON'T
MAKE SHOES OUT OF YOU."
THE ALLIGATOR TOOK
HIM ACROSS THE RIVER.
SEE WHAT I'M SAYING?
I GOT TO BE A
SMART BUNNY RABBIT.
YOU INSULTED THAT MAN.
GO OUT AND APOLOGIZE.
I CAN'T.
GO!
I WANT TO SAY SOMETHING.
I JUST WANT TO SAY
THAT I APOLOGIZE.
I DON'T THINK HE HEARD YOU.
I SAID...
MR. JEFFERSON, I LOST MY TEMPER.
WILL YOU ACCEPT MY APOLOGY?
WELL, SURE, WHY NOT?
WHEN I'M WRONG, I'M
ALWAYS FIRST TO APOLOGIZE.
I WANTED THE JOB TOO MUCH.
I WANT TO WORK WITH YOU.
YOU THE BEST.
TRUE.
IMAGINE BEING TAUGHT
THE CLEANING BUSINESS
BY THE MASTER,
MR. GEORGE JEFFERSON.
ONLY A FOOL WOULD PASS THAT UP.
I'D DO ANYTHING
TO LEARN FROM YOU.
THIS GUY'S STARTING
TO MAKE SENSE.
BUT YOU DON'T WANT ME.
WHERE YOU GOIN'?
JUST WALKING AROUND, THINKING.
MY GENERAL MANAGER
DON'T START OFF LIKE THAT.
I GOT THE JOB?
EITHER THAT OR I
DON'T GET NO PEACE.
YOU CAN SAY THAT AGAIN.
YOU'LL NEVER REGRET THIS.
I'LL HANDLE ALL
YOUR BOOKKEEPING,
YOUR PAYROLL, YOUR SUPPLIES...
YOU CAN RUN THE MEETING TONIGHT
WHILE MR. JEFFERSON
AND I GO TO CONEY ISLAND.
DON'T WORRY. I CAN
HANDLE EVERYTHING.
WE'LL SEE.
NOW THAT I'M AN EXECUTIVE,
ABOUT MY SALARY...
LESSON ONE FROM THE MASTER...
AN EXECUTIVE NEVER
TALKS ABOUT MONEY.
BYE, MR. JEFFERSON,
MRS. JEFFERSON.
OH.
FLORENCE, THANK
YOU FOR THAT TIP.
THIS BUNNY REALLY
PLAYED THAT OLD ALLIGATOR.
WORKS EVERY TIME.
WHAT HAPPENED TO THAT BUNNY
WHEN HE GOT ACROSS THE RIVER?
THE ALLIGATOR ATE HIM.
YEAH.
I'M SO PROUD OF YOU.
YOU HIRED YOUR FIRST
GENERAL MANAGER.
I DID, DIDN'T I?
HE'LL TALK TO THE SUPPLIERS.
HE'LL DEAL WITH THE ACCOUNTANTS.
HE'LL HANDLE THE EMPLOYEES.
WHAT'LL I DO?
ANYTHING YOU WANT.
YOU'VE GOT FREE TIME.
FREE TIME.
YOUR DAYS WILL BE YOUR OWN.
FREE TIME.
THIS IS THE GREATEST
IDEA YOU EVER HAD.
DO YOU REALLY THINK SO?
WHILE CLARENCE
DOES MY DIRTY WORK,
I'LL DO MORE IMPORTANT THINGS.
LIKE WHAT, GEORGE?
OPENING UP NEW STORES.
JUST KIDDING, WEEZY.
♪♪ [HUMMING]
[WOMAN] THE JEFFERSONS WAS
VIDEOTAPED IN FRONT OF A STUDIO AUDIENCE.