The Ghost and Molly McGee (2021–…): Season 1, Episode 6 - Mazel Tov, Libby!/No Good Deed - full transcript
Molly tries to throw Libby the best Bat Mitzvah ever, but misses the mark. When Darryl gets in trouble at school, Molly volunteers to help reform his ways.
Muah‐hah‐ha‐ha‐ha!
‐♪ Can't believe
you're all mine ♪
‐Uh, what?
‐♪ You and me for all time
‐Ugh!
♪ I'm never, ever, ever ♪
‐♪ Gonna be alone again ♪
‐Oh, boy!
‐♪ The dream team you and me
‐For all eternity?!
‐♪ For all eternity!
‐Aah!
♪ It's the ghost
It's the ghost ♪
♪ And Molly McGee
♪ I've been cursed
It's the worst! ♪
[Molly]
♪ Now you're stuck with me!
♪ We're never
gonna be apart ♪
♪ Is there a way
to hit restart? ♪
‐Nope!
‐♪ We're the ghost ♪
♪ Ghost and Molly McGee ♪
‐That's me!
‐Well, that's she.
♪ The Ghost
and Molly McGee! ♪
[gasps] Sweet baby corn!
An invitation?
I love invitations!
Eee! Open it!
Ooh! A "bat" mitzvah!
Uh, I think it's pronounced
"baat" mitzvah.
‐That is correct, Molly.
‐Ha! Knew it!
For months, I've been
studying Hebrew,
practicing my Torah portion,
and trying on dresses
which have given me
stress hives
‐and contact hives!
‐Aah!
‐Uch!
‐But it'll all be worth it,
because while
I'm a girl today,
on Saturday,
I shall become...
a woman!
OK, well, where do
the bats come in?
Ow!
[keys typing]
‐[klezmer music playing]
‐These bat mitzvah parties
are insane!
An ice volcano and
hot fudge lava?!
And is that Atomic Pink?!
Scratch, this is way bigger
than I thought.
It's as big as a wedding!
A Sweet 16!
Our curse‐aversary!
♪ It's my best friend's
bat mitzvah ♪
♪ A magical Jewish soirée
♪ It's my best friend's
bat mitzvah ♪
♪ Oh, Scratch,
prepare to be blown away ♪
I can see
the mashed potato bar now!
♪ Sparkling ball gowns
and gold limousines ♪
♪ Libby‐themed decorations
♪ Every table has
a beautiful centerpiece ♪
♪ Worth more than
a small island nation ♪
‐♪ Endless buffets
‐♪ Trapeze displays
♪ We're showered with gifts
as we dance ♪
♪ They'll have fountains
of not only chocolate ♪
♪ But also ketchup,
gravy, and ranch ♪
♪ At my best friend's
bat mitzvah ♪
♪ Celebrity DJs play
♪ At my best friend's
bat mitzvah ♪
♪ That's it!
I'm converting today! ♪
♪ It's my best friend's
bat mitzvah ♪
♪ So beautiful,
you'll shed a tear ♪
♪ She's telling the world
She's no longer a girl ♪
♪ Her womanhood
is almost here ♪
I see no fountain of ranch.
Molly! Oh! Thanks for coming
to synagogue.
OK, how was I?
Did I look too nervous?
‐Did I look like a woman?
‐Oh, yeah!
You rocked
that Torah portion.
I didn't understand any of it,
to be honest,
but you were great!
So, when's everyone else
coming here?
Everyone is here!
Uh, Libby, what about
kids from school
or the Wilder Scouts,
or the Lemmings?
Oh, all I need is you,
Rabbi Katz, and my fam!
OK, um, Mom, you know.
That's Uncle Ted and Aunt Meg
and their sons,
Joshua and Gordie.
‐Oh, wait. Where's Gordie?
‐[whimpers]
Enchanté, m'lady.
In 97 weeks, I'll be a man.
‐Ehh!
‐Ugh! Get outta here, Gordy.
Wow, you, uh...
really went all‐in
on the turtles.
Yeah, that's my theme.
Oh, I envy turtles.
They can curl their soft,
vulnerable bodies
into their hard shells,
where none of life's
sharp edges can harm them.
[sighs] What a life.
But‐But‐But Libby!
This is your special day!
You deserve a fountain,
a DJ, and a celebrity chef!
Oh, Molly, I mean, sure,
all that stuff might be nice,
but I'm just happy
you're here!
Oh! I need to prep the turtles
for the turtle races!
But after that, you and me,
we are going to party
into the night!
I mean, this party
is deader than I am,
‐and I'm dead!
‐[rimshot]
‐[Ms. Stein‐Torres]
We're scraping by.
‐[gasps]
But books just aren't selling
like they used to.
[sighs] We live
in a digital age.
Yep. E‐books
are e‐killing us.
Did you hear that, Scratch?
I only listen when I
hear my name, so... no.
Libby's Mom's bookstore
is struggling!
That's why Libby didn't go big
on her big day!
She's settling
and sacrificing and making do!
Well, I'm making don't!
Libby is a shining star,
so I'm gonna give her
the bat mitzvah she deserves!
Hundred percent
behind ya, Moll!
All right, how many
bats you want?
Two hundred, four hundred?
You know what?
You're right.
It's Libby's big day.
‐One thou‐‐!
‐Scratch! No bats!
‐[flame sounds]
‐[dishes clanging]
Could I get some help
with the cake in here?
♪
Whoo!
[both]
Wow!
Hmm... still needs
one final touch.
There you go, bats!
Go mitzvah!
N‐N‐No‐No‐No! No!
No! No! [grunting]
Oh, boy. No, Scratch!
This is the most important day
of Libby's life,
and nothing is going
to ruin it for her,
‐[door opens]
‐Molly? Did you hire me
through Gig‐Pig?
Yes! Mom, we need
an ice volcano, stat!
And you are the best
and only artist I know!
On it.
Dad, you're our DJ.
No smooth jazz.
I don't make promises
I can't keep.
And Darryl,
get us some guests!
‐[door slams open]
‐ ♪ Bum, bum, bum, bum‐ba‐dum
‐[Darryl singing]
‐Whoa, Darryl!
How'd you get all these people
on such short notice?
People will follow
a conga line anywhere, Molly.
Anywhere.
[klezmer music playing]
Oh, good, you did invite
your school friends!
I didn't.
Um, Molly, where did
all these people come from?
Eh, mazel tov, Libby!
Isn't it great!
They're all here for you!
Be the turtle, Libby.
Go to your happy place.
Hey, this is
a turtle party, isn't it?
So come out
of that shell, Libby!
Ugh! I knew that turtle metaphor
would come back to haunt me.
For the little girl
I love to bits,
time to get
your candles lit...s!
Candle one is for
my grandparents,
who've already passed.
They may be gone,
but their memories will last.
And next, for the woman
on whom I depend,
you're not only my mom,
you're also my friend.
(voice breaking)
Congrats, Libby.
I am so proud of the woman
you have become!
You make me feel safe
and ever so jolly.
Candle three is for
my best friend, Molly!
Molly, please stay
up here with me.
All these people!
I'm starting to feel
like a turtle without a shell.
Libby, I'm your best friend.
If you need me, I'm here.
I won't leave your side,
no matter whaaa...
[tiny brakes squealing]
[laughing]
[laughing in slo‐mo]
[cooing]
‐Gotta go!
‐[cooing continues]
Oh, no, buddy! Can't have you
opening this closet.
There's... a ghooost in there!
‐[crying]
‐Kinda nice to tell
the truth for once!
‐Scratch!
‐[hollers]
Scratch, this is
a big night for Libby,
and we don't need
your bats ruining it!
It's already ruined!
She's invited turtles up
to light candles!
[quiet cough]
Well, turtles are
what Libby wanted, OK?
Well, Libby can have
sad turtles
or friends at her party,
but she can't have both.
Follow me, Fawn‐dreas, there's
a quinceañera down the street.
Oh, no! We've gotta
get them to stay!
[sighs] Think, Molly,
think, Molly, think!
[gasps] What is one thing
no middle schooler can resist?
‐Slow dancing!
‐Room full o' bats!
[dance music playing]
Aw, yeah. We're gonna
bring it down a notch.
‐[smooth jazz playing]
‐Time for a smooth jazz
slow dance.
[all gasp]
‐Must dance.
‐Slow dance.
‐Dance.
‐Must dance.
‐Must find partner and dance.
‐You wanna dance?
Wanna dance?
Dance...
This party is back on track.
May I have this dance, m'lady?
I don't know what you expect
to happen here, my dude.
‐[groaning]
‐Whoop! [chuckles]
Sorry, Teddy Bear.
Out of order.
Ooh! But I had four shells
of turtle punch!
‐[inhales deeply]
‐Scratch, I am out there
trying to create
a wonderful memory
that Libby will cherish
in her heart forever,
and you are ruining it!
I'm just trying
to liven things up!
Look around, even Libby's
not enjoying this party.
‐[groans]
‐Oh, uh...
Don't worry, I'm on it!
Hey! Who's ready for the hora!
Um... Heights
and being tossed around
are two of
my biggest anxieties.
Can't we just do
the turtle races?
Oh! Of course we can!
‐Right after the hora!
‐[gulps]
It's the moment you've all
been waiting for,
that age‐old tradition,
the hora!
Give it up for
the woman of the hour,
Libby Stein‐Torres!
[all gasp]
She's probably
just being shy.
Just one moment.
[Libby sniffling]
Libby, what are you
doin' back here?
You're missin'
your special day.
Molly, you keep saying
it's my special day,
but it doesn't feel like
my day at all!
I didn't want a big party,
I didn't want all these people.
You've turned this party
into what you thought I wanted!
Oh. So, what was it
that you wanted?
To spend time with you!
Uh, sorry, it's the hormones.
But the feelings are accurate.
[gasps] It finally happened.
I'm a woman!
You know, I feel different.
Do I look taller to you?
I'm sorry, Libby,
but I'm gonna fix this.
Then I promise I am yours
for the rest of the night.
[klezmer music playing]
I'm not even
touching the door!
‐[sighs]
‐Oh! [giggles]
‐[bats screeching]
‐Yes!
‐Bats!
‐[screaming]
[screaming]
[all screaming]
Oh! Oh! Oh!
Give me the jazz!
‐[all screaming]
‐[Dad] Give me the jazz!
Now, that's a bat mitzvah!
Oh! Oh, they're
turning on me! Ow!
[all screaming]
Ooh, you ungrateful bats!
After all I did for you!
[grunts]
‐[Libby] Go, Simon!
‐[Uncle Ted] Go, Shelly!
‐[Libby] You can do it!
‐[Uncle Ted] Shelly!
You can do this!
‐[Libby] Yeah, yeah, yeah!
‐[Uncle Ted] Shelly, come on!
‐You gotta believe!
‐Yeah! Yeah, go, go!
Come on, Simon,
close the deal, baby!
‐[Uncle Ted] Come on,
faster, faster!
‐[all cheering]
[squeak‐honk]
‐Yes!
‐[all cheering]
Now, this is
the perfect party.
Sorry I almost ruined
your special day, Libby.
Oh, it's OK, Molly.
I've learned a lot
in the minutes
since I became a woman.
Like, how we're all responsible
for our own happiness.
It felt good to stand up
for what I wanted today.
Wow. You're so wise!
Wonder when I'll
become a woman.
[sighs] Enjoy what's left
of your childhood, Molly.
It'll be over
before ya know it.
Aah! It's way more of 'em
than we ordered!
[Molly and Scratch]
♪ The Ghost and Molly McGee
Three, two, one.
‐Whoa!
‐[cart tumbling]
[whoosh]
[all cheering]
‐[chuckles]
‐[blower intensifies]
[all cheering]
[Darryl chuckles]
That's my man!
You go, D‐Dawg!
[all cheering]
Whaa‐‐! Whoa!
Ha‐ha‐ha‐ha!
‐[all] Darryl! Darryl! Darryl!
‐[chuckling]
‐[whistle blowing]
‐[grunts]
[groans]
[sighs] Considering this is
the 27th report
in your file in three weeks,
the punishment will have
to be severe.
Why does this keep happening?
I'm just trying to be awesome.
We have no option
but to expel him!
Expulsion, Mr. Bates?
He's a clear
and present menace!
Oh, come on. He's a kid.
The only menace around here
is Miss Lightfoot
and that stinky salmon
she microwaves
‐in the teachers' lounge!
‐[gasps]
I have a vitamin D problem.
‐Take a supplement!
‐Supplements are a lie.
‐I'm sorry that you‐‐
‐It's all about the industry.
‐[teachers arguing]
‐I really need to schedule
a teacher team‐building day.
‐[arguing continues]
‐[Scratch yelps]
So, what's happening
in there?
Oh, they're fighting.
It's chaos!
Fighting?! Who's winning?
Is it Darryl?
He's taken at least
one‐and‐a‐half
‐Taekwondo classes.
‐No! The teachers are fighting!
They haven't even gotten
to Darryl yet.
Now, lemme go back!
I'm missing the good stuff.
Wait!
I believe the fair
punishment is...
six years detention!
But middle school
is only three years.
Ho‐ho‐ho‐ho, not
at the rate you're going!
There goes your fresh start
at a new school.
I thought Brighton was gonna
be different, Darryl.
I was just trying
to liven up recess!
It's been so boring since
they condemned the swing set.
[screams]
That doesn't mean you can
commandeer a janitor's cart!
Haven't we had this
exact conversation before?
No. Those were shopping carts,
custodian carts, and go‐karts!
All carts are off limits.
If it's got wheels,
stop commandeering it!
[sighs] What's
your secret, Molly?
You never get called down
to the principal's office.
What are you doing
that I'm not?
It's more about
what I'm not doing.
Which is pretty much
anything you're doing.
Maybe you could
teach me your ways?
Show me how to not
get into trouble?
Ooh! Like, nice lessons?
Welcome, class, to my
first‐ever seminar: How to Be‐‐
Boo! Being good's
for suckers. Ack! Hey!
Please refrain from distracting
the other students.
Today, we will learn
the 12 steps to being good.
Twelve?! OK, real talk,
my attention span is,
like, 15 minutes, including
a snack breeaa...
OK. We'll skip being
considerate to your elders,
having a strong moral compass,
befriending stray kittens.
You know what? I'll just boil
it down to the three essentials.
Step one: Think About Others.
♪
[male singer]
♪ It's nice to be nice
[both slurping]
♪ As my mother once said
‐ ♪ It's good to be good
‐[belches]
‐Aah!
‐ ♪ And it's fun to be fun
♪ It's nice to be nice
♪ Ooh
‐Aah!
‐ ♪ It's nice to be nice
♪ To be nice, to be
♪ Ooh
Aah! Aah!
‐ ♪ It's nice to be nice
‐[screams]
♪ As my mother once said
♪ It's good to be good
♪ And it's fun to be fun
[ding]
Dear family!
Breakfast is served!
Lots of condensed milk
on the roti canai,
just how you like 'em.
How'd you know!
Nice people pay attention.
Molly taught me that.
This is just like a restaurant!
Wow, Darryl! Thank you!
Molly, seems like
your lessons worked! Eee!
[slurping]
Mmm, that's some good roti!
Wow. Doing good
really does feel good!
‐What's going on?
‐[police radio chatter]
The teachers!
The teachers are missing!
‐[kids cheering]
‐Wait!
I'm still responsible for you!
Until 3:14 p. m.!
[van exploding]
Wow, this worked out great!
Wait. You did this?
No, sis. We did this.
I followed your lessons to a T!
I saw there was a problem,
so I took responsibility
to think of others
and find a solution!
The problem:
Teachers ruin all the fun.
But how to get rid of them?
I remembered there was
a prisoner pickup nearby
because of our highway cleanup.
So I gave the teachers
orange jumpsuits
to blend in on the bus,
and I forged a note
from Principal O'Connor
to make their team‐building
day seem legit!
[bus approaching]
Strange place for team building,
but what do I know?
Oh‐ho‐ho, Bates, don't give me
a set up line like that.
You sent our teachers
to prison?!
By your face, I can tell
that you're... proud?
‐[camera clicks]
‐Sorry, I just want
to preserve this moment.
And one more
with the failure filter...
[phone beeping]
This is bad, Darryl!
Really, really bad!
How? Look!
I made everyone happy!
You made the kids happy,
but what about the teachers?
Do you think they're happy?
In prison?!
Teachers? Have...
feelings? Wha‐‐ uh‐‐
Where does it end?!
[sighs]
Being good is harder
than I thought.
‐Ya think?!
‐OK, well...
To fix this, we gotta...
flee the country?
‐Save the teachers!
‐Save the teachers, yes!
Took the words
right out of my mouth.
Wow! What a realistic
escape room!
The walls even smell
like‐‐ [sniffing] ‐‐despair!
I should let my wife know
I'll be later for dinner.
‐[guard] No phones!
‐Oh! How authentic!
[scoffs] These bars.
Totally fake.
[growling, grunting]
[slurp] OK, production value's
pretty good here.
Well, let's move it, shall we?
Pam's making
stroganoff tonight,
and I don't wanna miss that.
Start lookin' for those clues!
You don't understand,
they're falsely imprisoned!
Sorry, kid. I'm not lettin'
you in or anyone out.
Don't worry. I know
another way in.
But we might have to be
a little bad
to do a little good.
Oh! Do you think
this is a clue?
I usually find you feckless
and annoying, Lightfoot,
but you've proved me wrong.
In this case.
Look, we just have
to dig through that hole!
OK, Scratch. Just go
through the fence
and open the door for us.
I mean, usually, people try
to break out of prison,
not in, but what the hey.
[exclaiming]
‐Is he dead?
‐I don't think a ghost can die?
(slurring) Oh, look! It's
the great ghost expert here
to tell us all the ghost expert
stuff she knows!
Guess electricity makes
ghosts... silly?
(slurring) So glad you're here
to enlighten us, ghost‐pert!
Here comes the heat.
[teachers grunting]
‐[grunts] 72... 73...
‐Mmm...
‐74... hey, there.
‐Mmm...
‐83...
‐Mmm...
‐[all sigh]
‐Got away with that one.
[playing harmonica]
Scratch, just open
the door, please!
[playing continues]
♪ I got them
jail house blues! ♪
‐Whoo!
‐Yeah, that's great, so now
could you please just‐‐
♪ I got them...
jail house... blues! ♪
‐Whoo!
‐Beautiful, Scratch.
‐[harmonica playing]
‐So could you please now‐‐
Could you‐‐?
[playing continues]
[all grunt]
Yes! We did it!
[bird chirping]
How are we gonna
get over that?
I don't think we're getting
the teachers out, Molly.
[sighs] At least, not till
Scratch sleeps this off.
[snoring]
I'm just no good
at being good.
I'm... I'm always
gonna be... bad.
You're not gonna be
perfect overnight.
Give it time.
But in the meantime...
Let's get diggin'!
Hm?
[alarm sounding]
‐[guard] Over here!
‐[barking]
Aah!
[groans]
[growls]
[prisoners clamoring]
Obstacle course!
[all grunting, shouting]
Ms. Roop?
Tommy Knuckles!
Sixth grade history!
[both]
Third period!
[guard]
Freeze!
Psst!
I think we're gonna fail
team‐building.
We'd need a rocket
to get outta here!
Maybe that delinquent
McGee kid was onto something.
‐[alarm sounding]
‐Ugh. What happened?
I have a splitting headache.
‐Huh?
‐[teachers cheering]
[all laughing]
[all grunting]
OK, I feel like
I missed a lot.
[school bell ringing]
Not gonna lie, didn't have
too much faith in you bozos,
but we made a good team
in the end!
‐[laughs] We did!
‐Go team!
Who knew prison would be such
a bonding experience?
Yeah! I hope I get to go
to prison some day.
I think you will, sport.
I think you will.
And thanks, Molly.
You've taught me
a valuable lesson.
Aw, I'm glad
to hear that, Darryl.
[chuckles] Yep.
I've learned that
even when I try really hard
to be good,
I still get things wrong.
So I should just be me
and hope for the best!
‐Wait, what?
‐Now, if you'll excuse me,
I see an AV cart
with my name on it!
No, no, no, no,
that's not the lesson!
[explosion]
I'm dropping your class.
[Molly and Scratch]
♪ The Ghost and Molly McGee
‐♪ Can't believe
you're all mine ♪
‐Uh, what?
‐♪ You and me for all time
‐Ugh!
♪ I'm never, ever, ever ♪
‐♪ Gonna be alone again ♪
‐Oh, boy!
‐♪ The dream team you and me
‐For all eternity?!
‐♪ For all eternity!
‐Aah!
♪ It's the ghost
It's the ghost ♪
♪ And Molly McGee
♪ I've been cursed
It's the worst! ♪
[Molly]
♪ Now you're stuck with me!
♪ We're never
gonna be apart ♪
♪ Is there a way
to hit restart? ♪
‐Nope!
‐♪ We're the ghost ♪
♪ Ghost and Molly McGee ♪
‐That's me!
‐Well, that's she.
♪ The Ghost
and Molly McGee! ♪
[gasps] Sweet baby corn!
An invitation?
I love invitations!
Eee! Open it!
Ooh! A "bat" mitzvah!
Uh, I think it's pronounced
"baat" mitzvah.
‐That is correct, Molly.
‐Ha! Knew it!
For months, I've been
studying Hebrew,
practicing my Torah portion,
and trying on dresses
which have given me
stress hives
‐and contact hives!
‐Aah!
‐Uch!
‐But it'll all be worth it,
because while
I'm a girl today,
on Saturday,
I shall become...
a woman!
OK, well, where do
the bats come in?
Ow!
[keys typing]
‐[klezmer music playing]
‐These bat mitzvah parties
are insane!
An ice volcano and
hot fudge lava?!
And is that Atomic Pink?!
Scratch, this is way bigger
than I thought.
It's as big as a wedding!
A Sweet 16!
Our curse‐aversary!
♪ It's my best friend's
bat mitzvah ♪
♪ A magical Jewish soirée
♪ It's my best friend's
bat mitzvah ♪
♪ Oh, Scratch,
prepare to be blown away ♪
I can see
the mashed potato bar now!
♪ Sparkling ball gowns
and gold limousines ♪
♪ Libby‐themed decorations
♪ Every table has
a beautiful centerpiece ♪
♪ Worth more than
a small island nation ♪
‐♪ Endless buffets
‐♪ Trapeze displays
♪ We're showered with gifts
as we dance ♪
♪ They'll have fountains
of not only chocolate ♪
♪ But also ketchup,
gravy, and ranch ♪
♪ At my best friend's
bat mitzvah ♪
♪ Celebrity DJs play
♪ At my best friend's
bat mitzvah ♪
♪ That's it!
I'm converting today! ♪
♪ It's my best friend's
bat mitzvah ♪
♪ So beautiful,
you'll shed a tear ♪
♪ She's telling the world
She's no longer a girl ♪
♪ Her womanhood
is almost here ♪
I see no fountain of ranch.
Molly! Oh! Thanks for coming
to synagogue.
OK, how was I?
Did I look too nervous?
‐Did I look like a woman?
‐Oh, yeah!
You rocked
that Torah portion.
I didn't understand any of it,
to be honest,
but you were great!
So, when's everyone else
coming here?
Everyone is here!
Uh, Libby, what about
kids from school
or the Wilder Scouts,
or the Lemmings?
Oh, all I need is you,
Rabbi Katz, and my fam!
OK, um, Mom, you know.
That's Uncle Ted and Aunt Meg
and their sons,
Joshua and Gordie.
‐Oh, wait. Where's Gordie?
‐[whimpers]
Enchanté, m'lady.
In 97 weeks, I'll be a man.
‐Ehh!
‐Ugh! Get outta here, Gordy.
Wow, you, uh...
really went all‐in
on the turtles.
Yeah, that's my theme.
Oh, I envy turtles.
They can curl their soft,
vulnerable bodies
into their hard shells,
where none of life's
sharp edges can harm them.
[sighs] What a life.
But‐But‐But Libby!
This is your special day!
You deserve a fountain,
a DJ, and a celebrity chef!
Oh, Molly, I mean, sure,
all that stuff might be nice,
but I'm just happy
you're here!
Oh! I need to prep the turtles
for the turtle races!
But after that, you and me,
we are going to party
into the night!
I mean, this party
is deader than I am,
‐and I'm dead!
‐[rimshot]
‐[Ms. Stein‐Torres]
We're scraping by.
‐[gasps]
But books just aren't selling
like they used to.
[sighs] We live
in a digital age.
Yep. E‐books
are e‐killing us.
Did you hear that, Scratch?
I only listen when I
hear my name, so... no.
Libby's Mom's bookstore
is struggling!
That's why Libby didn't go big
on her big day!
She's settling
and sacrificing and making do!
Well, I'm making don't!
Libby is a shining star,
so I'm gonna give her
the bat mitzvah she deserves!
Hundred percent
behind ya, Moll!
All right, how many
bats you want?
Two hundred, four hundred?
You know what?
You're right.
It's Libby's big day.
‐One thou‐‐!
‐Scratch! No bats!
‐[flame sounds]
‐[dishes clanging]
Could I get some help
with the cake in here?
♪
Whoo!
[both]
Wow!
Hmm... still needs
one final touch.
There you go, bats!
Go mitzvah!
N‐N‐No‐No‐No! No!
No! No! [grunting]
Oh, boy. No, Scratch!
This is the most important day
of Libby's life,
and nothing is going
to ruin it for her,
‐[door opens]
‐Molly? Did you hire me
through Gig‐Pig?
Yes! Mom, we need
an ice volcano, stat!
And you are the best
and only artist I know!
On it.
Dad, you're our DJ.
No smooth jazz.
I don't make promises
I can't keep.
And Darryl,
get us some guests!
‐[door slams open]
‐ ♪ Bum, bum, bum, bum‐ba‐dum
‐[Darryl singing]
‐Whoa, Darryl!
How'd you get all these people
on such short notice?
People will follow
a conga line anywhere, Molly.
Anywhere.
[klezmer music playing]
Oh, good, you did invite
your school friends!
I didn't.
Um, Molly, where did
all these people come from?
Eh, mazel tov, Libby!
Isn't it great!
They're all here for you!
Be the turtle, Libby.
Go to your happy place.
Hey, this is
a turtle party, isn't it?
So come out
of that shell, Libby!
Ugh! I knew that turtle metaphor
would come back to haunt me.
For the little girl
I love to bits,
time to get
your candles lit...s!
Candle one is for
my grandparents,
who've already passed.
They may be gone,
but their memories will last.
And next, for the woman
on whom I depend,
you're not only my mom,
you're also my friend.
(voice breaking)
Congrats, Libby.
I am so proud of the woman
you have become!
You make me feel safe
and ever so jolly.
Candle three is for
my best friend, Molly!
Molly, please stay
up here with me.
All these people!
I'm starting to feel
like a turtle without a shell.
Libby, I'm your best friend.
If you need me, I'm here.
I won't leave your side,
no matter whaaa...
[tiny brakes squealing]
[laughing]
[laughing in slo‐mo]
[cooing]
‐Gotta go!
‐[cooing continues]
Oh, no, buddy! Can't have you
opening this closet.
There's... a ghooost in there!
‐[crying]
‐Kinda nice to tell
the truth for once!
‐Scratch!
‐[hollers]
Scratch, this is
a big night for Libby,
and we don't need
your bats ruining it!
It's already ruined!
She's invited turtles up
to light candles!
[quiet cough]
Well, turtles are
what Libby wanted, OK?
Well, Libby can have
sad turtles
or friends at her party,
but she can't have both.
Follow me, Fawn‐dreas, there's
a quinceañera down the street.
Oh, no! We've gotta
get them to stay!
[sighs] Think, Molly,
think, Molly, think!
[gasps] What is one thing
no middle schooler can resist?
‐Slow dancing!
‐Room full o' bats!
[dance music playing]
Aw, yeah. We're gonna
bring it down a notch.
‐[smooth jazz playing]
‐Time for a smooth jazz
slow dance.
[all gasp]
‐Must dance.
‐Slow dance.
‐Dance.
‐Must dance.
‐Must find partner and dance.
‐You wanna dance?
Wanna dance?
Dance...
This party is back on track.
May I have this dance, m'lady?
I don't know what you expect
to happen here, my dude.
‐[groaning]
‐Whoop! [chuckles]
Sorry, Teddy Bear.
Out of order.
Ooh! But I had four shells
of turtle punch!
‐[inhales deeply]
‐Scratch, I am out there
trying to create
a wonderful memory
that Libby will cherish
in her heart forever,
and you are ruining it!
I'm just trying
to liven things up!
Look around, even Libby's
not enjoying this party.
‐[groans]
‐Oh, uh...
Don't worry, I'm on it!
Hey! Who's ready for the hora!
Um... Heights
and being tossed around
are two of
my biggest anxieties.
Can't we just do
the turtle races?
Oh! Of course we can!
‐Right after the hora!
‐[gulps]
It's the moment you've all
been waiting for,
that age‐old tradition,
the hora!
Give it up for
the woman of the hour,
Libby Stein‐Torres!
[all gasp]
She's probably
just being shy.
Just one moment.
[Libby sniffling]
Libby, what are you
doin' back here?
You're missin'
your special day.
Molly, you keep saying
it's my special day,
but it doesn't feel like
my day at all!
I didn't want a big party,
I didn't want all these people.
You've turned this party
into what you thought I wanted!
Oh. So, what was it
that you wanted?
To spend time with you!
Uh, sorry, it's the hormones.
But the feelings are accurate.
[gasps] It finally happened.
I'm a woman!
You know, I feel different.
Do I look taller to you?
I'm sorry, Libby,
but I'm gonna fix this.
Then I promise I am yours
for the rest of the night.
[klezmer music playing]
I'm not even
touching the door!
‐[sighs]
‐Oh! [giggles]
‐[bats screeching]
‐Yes!
‐Bats!
‐[screaming]
[screaming]
[all screaming]
Oh! Oh! Oh!
Give me the jazz!
‐[all screaming]
‐[Dad] Give me the jazz!
Now, that's a bat mitzvah!
Oh! Oh, they're
turning on me! Ow!
[all screaming]
Ooh, you ungrateful bats!
After all I did for you!
[grunts]
‐[Libby] Go, Simon!
‐[Uncle Ted] Go, Shelly!
‐[Libby] You can do it!
‐[Uncle Ted] Shelly!
You can do this!
‐[Libby] Yeah, yeah, yeah!
‐[Uncle Ted] Shelly, come on!
‐You gotta believe!
‐Yeah! Yeah, go, go!
Come on, Simon,
close the deal, baby!
‐[Uncle Ted] Come on,
faster, faster!
‐[all cheering]
[squeak‐honk]
‐Yes!
‐[all cheering]
Now, this is
the perfect party.
Sorry I almost ruined
your special day, Libby.
Oh, it's OK, Molly.
I've learned a lot
in the minutes
since I became a woman.
Like, how we're all responsible
for our own happiness.
It felt good to stand up
for what I wanted today.
Wow. You're so wise!
Wonder when I'll
become a woman.
[sighs] Enjoy what's left
of your childhood, Molly.
It'll be over
before ya know it.
Aah! It's way more of 'em
than we ordered!
[Molly and Scratch]
♪ The Ghost and Molly McGee
Three, two, one.
‐Whoa!
‐[cart tumbling]
[whoosh]
[all cheering]
‐[chuckles]
‐[blower intensifies]
[all cheering]
[Darryl chuckles]
That's my man!
You go, D‐Dawg!
[all cheering]
Whaa‐‐! Whoa!
Ha‐ha‐ha‐ha!
‐[all] Darryl! Darryl! Darryl!
‐[chuckling]
‐[whistle blowing]
‐[grunts]
[groans]
[sighs] Considering this is
the 27th report
in your file in three weeks,
the punishment will have
to be severe.
Why does this keep happening?
I'm just trying to be awesome.
We have no option
but to expel him!
Expulsion, Mr. Bates?
He's a clear
and present menace!
Oh, come on. He's a kid.
The only menace around here
is Miss Lightfoot
and that stinky salmon
she microwaves
‐in the teachers' lounge!
‐[gasps]
I have a vitamin D problem.
‐Take a supplement!
‐Supplements are a lie.
‐I'm sorry that you‐‐
‐It's all about the industry.
‐[teachers arguing]
‐I really need to schedule
a teacher team‐building day.
‐[arguing continues]
‐[Scratch yelps]
So, what's happening
in there?
Oh, they're fighting.
It's chaos!
Fighting?! Who's winning?
Is it Darryl?
He's taken at least
one‐and‐a‐half
‐Taekwondo classes.
‐No! The teachers are fighting!
They haven't even gotten
to Darryl yet.
Now, lemme go back!
I'm missing the good stuff.
Wait!
I believe the fair
punishment is...
six years detention!
But middle school
is only three years.
Ho‐ho‐ho‐ho, not
at the rate you're going!
There goes your fresh start
at a new school.
I thought Brighton was gonna
be different, Darryl.
I was just trying
to liven up recess!
It's been so boring since
they condemned the swing set.
[screams]
That doesn't mean you can
commandeer a janitor's cart!
Haven't we had this
exact conversation before?
No. Those were shopping carts,
custodian carts, and go‐karts!
All carts are off limits.
If it's got wheels,
stop commandeering it!
[sighs] What's
your secret, Molly?
You never get called down
to the principal's office.
What are you doing
that I'm not?
It's more about
what I'm not doing.
Which is pretty much
anything you're doing.
Maybe you could
teach me your ways?
Show me how to not
get into trouble?
Ooh! Like, nice lessons?
Welcome, class, to my
first‐ever seminar: How to Be‐‐
Boo! Being good's
for suckers. Ack! Hey!
Please refrain from distracting
the other students.
Today, we will learn
the 12 steps to being good.
Twelve?! OK, real talk,
my attention span is,
like, 15 minutes, including
a snack breeaa...
OK. We'll skip being
considerate to your elders,
having a strong moral compass,
befriending stray kittens.
You know what? I'll just boil
it down to the three essentials.
Step one: Think About Others.
♪
[male singer]
♪ It's nice to be nice
[both slurping]
♪ As my mother once said
‐ ♪ It's good to be good
‐[belches]
‐Aah!
‐ ♪ And it's fun to be fun
♪ It's nice to be nice
♪ Ooh
‐Aah!
‐ ♪ It's nice to be nice
♪ To be nice, to be
♪ Ooh
Aah! Aah!
‐ ♪ It's nice to be nice
‐[screams]
♪ As my mother once said
♪ It's good to be good
♪ And it's fun to be fun
[ding]
Dear family!
Breakfast is served!
Lots of condensed milk
on the roti canai,
just how you like 'em.
How'd you know!
Nice people pay attention.
Molly taught me that.
This is just like a restaurant!
Wow, Darryl! Thank you!
Molly, seems like
your lessons worked! Eee!
[slurping]
Mmm, that's some good roti!
Wow. Doing good
really does feel good!
‐What's going on?
‐[police radio chatter]
The teachers!
The teachers are missing!
‐[kids cheering]
‐Wait!
I'm still responsible for you!
Until 3:14 p. m.!
[van exploding]
Wow, this worked out great!
Wait. You did this?
No, sis. We did this.
I followed your lessons to a T!
I saw there was a problem,
so I took responsibility
to think of others
and find a solution!
The problem:
Teachers ruin all the fun.
But how to get rid of them?
I remembered there was
a prisoner pickup nearby
because of our highway cleanup.
So I gave the teachers
orange jumpsuits
to blend in on the bus,
and I forged a note
from Principal O'Connor
to make their team‐building
day seem legit!
[bus approaching]
Strange place for team building,
but what do I know?
Oh‐ho‐ho, Bates, don't give me
a set up line like that.
You sent our teachers
to prison?!
By your face, I can tell
that you're... proud?
‐[camera clicks]
‐Sorry, I just want
to preserve this moment.
And one more
with the failure filter...
[phone beeping]
This is bad, Darryl!
Really, really bad!
How? Look!
I made everyone happy!
You made the kids happy,
but what about the teachers?
Do you think they're happy?
In prison?!
Teachers? Have...
feelings? Wha‐‐ uh‐‐
Where does it end?!
[sighs]
Being good is harder
than I thought.
‐Ya think?!
‐OK, well...
To fix this, we gotta...
flee the country?
‐Save the teachers!
‐Save the teachers, yes!
Took the words
right out of my mouth.
Wow! What a realistic
escape room!
The walls even smell
like‐‐ [sniffing] ‐‐despair!
I should let my wife know
I'll be later for dinner.
‐[guard] No phones!
‐Oh! How authentic!
[scoffs] These bars.
Totally fake.
[growling, grunting]
[slurp] OK, production value's
pretty good here.
Well, let's move it, shall we?
Pam's making
stroganoff tonight,
and I don't wanna miss that.
Start lookin' for those clues!
You don't understand,
they're falsely imprisoned!
Sorry, kid. I'm not lettin'
you in or anyone out.
Don't worry. I know
another way in.
But we might have to be
a little bad
to do a little good.
Oh! Do you think
this is a clue?
I usually find you feckless
and annoying, Lightfoot,
but you've proved me wrong.
In this case.
Look, we just have
to dig through that hole!
OK, Scratch. Just go
through the fence
and open the door for us.
I mean, usually, people try
to break out of prison,
not in, but what the hey.
[exclaiming]
‐Is he dead?
‐I don't think a ghost can die?
(slurring) Oh, look! It's
the great ghost expert here
to tell us all the ghost expert
stuff she knows!
Guess electricity makes
ghosts... silly?
(slurring) So glad you're here
to enlighten us, ghost‐pert!
Here comes the heat.
[teachers grunting]
‐[grunts] 72... 73...
‐Mmm...
‐74... hey, there.
‐Mmm...
‐83...
‐Mmm...
‐[all sigh]
‐Got away with that one.
[playing harmonica]
Scratch, just open
the door, please!
[playing continues]
♪ I got them
jail house blues! ♪
‐Whoo!
‐Yeah, that's great, so now
could you please just‐‐
♪ I got them...
jail house... blues! ♪
‐Whoo!
‐Beautiful, Scratch.
‐[harmonica playing]
‐So could you please now‐‐
Could you‐‐?
[playing continues]
[all grunt]
Yes! We did it!
[bird chirping]
How are we gonna
get over that?
I don't think we're getting
the teachers out, Molly.
[sighs] At least, not till
Scratch sleeps this off.
[snoring]
I'm just no good
at being good.
I'm... I'm always
gonna be... bad.
You're not gonna be
perfect overnight.
Give it time.
But in the meantime...
Let's get diggin'!
Hm?
[alarm sounding]
‐[guard] Over here!
‐[barking]
Aah!
[groans]
[growls]
[prisoners clamoring]
Obstacle course!
[all grunting, shouting]
Ms. Roop?
Tommy Knuckles!
Sixth grade history!
[both]
Third period!
[guard]
Freeze!
Psst!
I think we're gonna fail
team‐building.
We'd need a rocket
to get outta here!
Maybe that delinquent
McGee kid was onto something.
‐[alarm sounding]
‐Ugh. What happened?
I have a splitting headache.
‐Huh?
‐[teachers cheering]
[all laughing]
[all grunting]
OK, I feel like
I missed a lot.
[school bell ringing]
Not gonna lie, didn't have
too much faith in you bozos,
but we made a good team
in the end!
‐[laughs] We did!
‐Go team!
Who knew prison would be such
a bonding experience?
Yeah! I hope I get to go
to prison some day.
I think you will, sport.
I think you will.
And thanks, Molly.
You've taught me
a valuable lesson.
Aw, I'm glad
to hear that, Darryl.
[chuckles] Yep.
I've learned that
even when I try really hard
to be good,
I still get things wrong.
So I should just be me
and hope for the best!
‐Wait, what?
‐Now, if you'll excuse me,
I see an AV cart
with my name on it!
No, no, no, no,
that's not the lesson!
[explosion]
I'm dropping your class.
[Molly and Scratch]
♪ The Ghost and Molly McGee