The Flintstones (1960–1966): Season 3, Episode 22 - Fred's New Job - full transcript

In order to afford the upcoming expenses for the baby, Fred attempts to get a raise from Mr.Slate. However, he and his son dissuade Fred quickly. Seeking the help of Barney, dressed as a millionaire who wants to hire him, Fred second attempt of a raise backfires as Mr.Slate releases him from his job. Fred must find a new job in the ads, however, he does not seem to find the perfect job at all...

What a cinch.
Everything's handy.

A brontosaurus burger
with a cactusberry malt.

One brontosaurus burger
with a cactusberry malt.

Coming up.

Say, this place
isn't very busy, is it?

Not now,
but it picks up

When the factory over there
lets out for lunch.


[Engines revving]

[Factory whistle blows]

Oh, no!

[Carhop] roast beef san,
no gravy.

Ham and dodo eggs,
easy over.

Brontodog twice,
with onions.

Pterodactyl giblets.

Make them lean.

Six javas,
cream and sugar.

One saber shake.


Let me outta here!



meet the Flintstones

They're the modern
stone age family

From the town of bedrock

They're a page
right out of history

Let's ride with the family
down the street

Through the courtesy

Of Fred's two feet

When you're
with the Flintstones

Have a yabba-Dabba-Doo

A dabba-Doo time

We'll have
a gay old time


Hee-Hee-Hoo hoo!

Boink! Boink! Boink!
Boink! Boink! Boink!


Hee-Hee-Hoo hoo!

Boink! Boink! Boink!
Boink! Boink! Boink!

Boink! Boink! Boink!

Get outta here!

Boink! Boink!
Boink! Boink!

Hee-Hee-Hoo hoo!


Fred, can't you get up
without all that noise?

It's that pesty
gooney bird.

He's back again.

Why can't he return
to capistranorock

Or wherever else
he belongs?

What a thing
to look forward to

All summer.

Oh, I'm so tired.

I was awake
most of the night.

It just could have
been the pickles

And cactusberry
ice cream

I had to go out and
get for you last night.

I'm sorry, Fred.

Heh heh heh.

Think nothing of it,

All expectant mothers
get strange cravings.

I guess so, Fred.

Now, Wilma, you stay
in bed and rest,

And I'll fix
my own breakfast.

Oh, thanks, Fred.

I'll tippytoe around
so I won't disturb you.



Fred! What happened?

Oh, it was nothing,

I just tripped
on Dino's bone.

Alright, Fred.


[Water running]


Oh, boy!
That feels good.


Oh, my darlin'

Oh, my darlin'

Oh, my darlin'

Fred, please be quiet.

Oh. Oh, I'm sorry,

Go back to sleep,

I'll be very quiet.

Oh, dear.


Well, I'm not very
hungry this morning.

Couple of dodo eggs

And a slice
of brontosaurus ham

Should do it.

Let's see.
I'll need a frying pan.



Now, where did Wilma
hide the frying pan?

Everything else but.



I thought
you were sleeping.

With all this racket?

Well, the frying pan
is lost, and I--

That Wilma's a magician.

That pan was not there
a minute ago.

[Sniff sniff sniff]


Something's burning!

Help! Fire! Help!

[Bell rings]


Fred, are you

Of course
I'm alright.

Ha ha.

But the ham got
a little crisp.

Now go to sleep.

Sleep? I called
the fire department.

Now what did you
do that for?

[Pounding at door]

[Man] open up there!

Sorry, boys. I was
just making my--

Ok. We got it
under control.

You can turn it off now.

I wish I could think
of a better way

To make a living.

They're leaving, Fred.
Are you ok?

Yeah, yeah. I'm ok.

I don't get it!

A guy wants to fix
his own breakfast,

And the whole world
becomes unglued.

No more sleeping for you
in the morning, Wilma.

I have cooked
my last breakfast.


It's about time
you showed up, Fred.

We're gonna be late
for work.


Boy, what a grouch that
Fred is in the morning.

Hey, did you have
trouble sleeping

Last night, Fred?

I never
have trouble sleeping.

My trouble starts
when I wake up.

You look
worried, Fred.

on your mind?

I'll say.

The baby's on the way,

And there's so many things
a baby should have.

I need more money
than I'm making, barney.

The solution's
very simple, Fred.

Oh, yeah?

Sure. Just hit your
boss up for a raise.

That sounds easy,
but I don't dare ask.

Well, you have to have

Confidence in yourself,

Get in there and
demand more money.

You deserve more dough,


Yeah, you do a good job
running that digger.


You're gonna have
another mouth to feed.

Right, barney. I'll do it.

I'll hit mr. Slate
up for a raise

The minute I get there.

Good boy, Fred.

But first
we'll have to bypass

This freeway traffic.

Ok, Fred,
let's go.

Eddy, Fred Flintstone
is going to have a baby.

Do you know
what that means?

Yeah, yeah.

A baby is little,
soft, cute,

And goes
"goo goo goo."

No, no, no!

It means that Flintstone
is coming here

To ask for a raise.

Every employee here
that has a baby

Expects me
to pick up the tab.

We've got to make an example
of Fred Flintstone.

No raise.

But it's bad labor
relations to say that.


Then we've got to
prevent him from asking.

But how?

How about
operation cringe?


Operation cringe
has never failed.

You've justified
my faith in you

When I selected you
to be manager

Of this company.

Gee, thanks, father.

You practice your
"operation cringe" lines, son.

I'll tell miss larock
what to say.

Oh, miss larock,

When Fred Flintstone
comes in,

Tell him that the
manager is in with me

Asking for a raise.

But tell him to wait.
Got it?

I got it, poopsie.

Shh. Mimi, not
with the "poopsie."

Yes, mr. Slate.

Ever since the last
office party,

I've been "poopsie."

I wonder what happened.

I'll catch mr. Slate
off guard.

It'll be a cinch.

Good luck, Fred.
See you after work.

Right, barney.

Hello, miss larock.

I'd like to see mr. Slate,
uh, on a private matter.

The manager is in with
him now, mr. Flintstone.

He's asking for a raise,

But you can wait
in his outer office.

Yeah, thanks.

Huh. That's a good one.

The manager's
mr. Slate's son.

How can he miss
getting a raise?

[Eddy] no! No, father!
Not that!

[Mr. Slate]
out! Out! Out!

[Eddy] I'm sorry
I asked for a raise.

Please! Please
don't fire me.

I'll take a cut.

Did you say "cut"?

To the bone.

Just working here with you
is pay enough.

Alright. You can
have your job back

At half pay.

Gee, thanks, dad.

[Kiss kiss kiss]

Thanks a lot.

His own son...

well, Flintstone,

What is it you want?

I, uh...

I jus--I...

is a good worker.

Yes. That's because
of our incentive plan.

What incentive plan?

Work hard
or get fired.

You can't beat that
for incentive.

Gee. I'm learning
a lot from you, dad.

Did you get your
raise, Fred? How much?

Ah, shut up.

Don't tell me you
chickened out, Fred.

Yeah, I chickened out--
Feathers and all.

You want to make
something out of it?

Oh, no, not me, Fred.

Let's go home.

I've been gradually
picking up

A few things for
the baby, Betty.

Oh, let me see, Wilma.

How about that--

ocelot panties.

Ah. Darling, Wilma.

A bearskin pullover
for cold mornings.

Oh, isn't that cute?

Sheepskin booties.

They're lovely.

A sabertooth
tiger-Skin blanket.

keep him warm.

Let's go in the baby's
room, Betty,

And look at the stuffed
toys Fred made.

He likes them

Isn't that
just like Fred?

I haven't the heart
to tell him

They have to go.

Uh-Oh. I have a roast
leg of mastodon

In the oven
for Fred's dinner.

And I forgot
to baste it.

Be careful,

Oh, thank goodness
it didn't burn.

One good thing
about roast--

You have
your meal,

And there's
enough left over

For sandwiches.

That's right, Betty.

[Tires screeching]

Sounds like the boys
are home, Wilma.

I'd better run and get
barney's dinner.

See you
after dinner, Fred.


Hiya, Betty.

Hello, dear.

Hey, uh, did you steam
those clams for dinner?

Yes, dear.
Everything's on the table.

Oh, boy, do I love
steamed clams.

Nyaaarh! Arrr!

Why you @#%@&!


Well. I never saw a clam
any more steamed.

Hee hee hee hee!

Sure loved
that roast, Wilma.

Glad you liked it, Fred.

Would you give
the bone to Dino?

Yeah, good idea.

Here you are, Dino.
Come on, boy.

Here's a bone for you.

[Arr arr arr]

Ok, fella,
it's yours.


Heh heh heh.
Look at him go, Wilma.

Dino sure loves bones.

[Bam bam]

He's trying
to get it outside.

Yeah, he wants
to bury it.

Ain't that cute?

I'll help him, Wilma.

I'm going outside

Hey, just a minute,

I'll help you get
through the door.


How about that, Wilma?

Ha ha ha ha!

He got it out
by himself.

Yeah. I see.

If I can't get a raise
from mr. Slate,

I'm sunk.

I want our baby to have
everything it needs,

But I don't know where
the things are coming from.

Everything is
so expensive.

And I don't want Wilma
to start worrying.

If they were smart,

They'd lay eggs
like we do

And have no problems.

Hey, Fred.

I've got it, Fred!
I've got it!

You got what?

A way for you to get
mr. Slate to give you a raise.

Oh, yeah? How?

I figure if someone
offered you more money...

yes? Yes? Go on.

Well, mr. Slate
would give you a raise

To keep you.

Swell. Just swell.

And whom is going
to offer me more money?

Well, uh, gee whiz,

I haven't figured out
all the details yet.

Oh, barney,
get out of here

With your
silly ideas.

But Fred--

Out, out, out!

I was only trying
to help you, Fred.

Things are bad enough

Without having a
numskull for a neighbor.

Of all the crazy ideas--

Have somebody
offer me more money.

More money.


Wait a minute. I know
how it can be done.

Hey, barney.

Just a minute,
lifelong chum

And bosom buddy.

I am not sure I want
to talk to you, Fred.

What's the matter?

Well, I got feelings,

And I get hurt when you say
my ideas are silly.

Then you give me
the "out, out, out" stuff.

Oh, I'm sorry,
barney. Forgive me.

Say "pretty please."


Pretty please.

Kiss my foot.


Ok. Kiss your foot.

Hey! What am I doing?

Ho ho ho!
Kiss my foot.

I almost got you
that time, Fred.

Ok, ok.
Joke's over.

Ok, Fred.
Ha ha ha!

Hey, uh, what did you
want to talk about?

Oh, about that idea.

But wait a minute.

What's all this with
the baby elephant?

Oh, just another one
of my ideas, Fred.

The little elephant's
full of water.

Watch when
I start the car.

[Engine stalls]

[Engine starts]


How's that, Fred?

The barney rubble sprinkler.

My latest invention.


Yeah, yeah.
That's great, barney.

Listen, pal,

About that idea you had
to get me a raise...

oh, you mean about somebody
offering you more money

To fool mr. Slate.

I figured you could
do it for me, chum.

Oh, no, no, no,
not me, Fred.

But, barney, pal,
it's a noble cause.

It's for the baby,

Your godchild.


Well, uh,
in that case,

Ok, Fred. I'll do it,

But I got
to figure out how.

Oh, you're a pal.
I'll go tell Wilma.

Wilma! Oh, Wilma!

I figured out
how to get a raise

From mr. Slate tomorrow!

That's wonderful, Fred,
and if you do,

I can get all the things

The baby
is going to need.

You do that, sweetie.

The raise is in the bag.

[Barney] oh, uh, Fred, will
you step outside a minute?

Excuse me, Wilma.
I'll see what barney wants.

How do I look in white tie
and tails, Fred?

Oh, where did you
get that getup?

It's the playboy costume
I wore in the lodge play.


Oh, yeah.

I'm going to
wear it tomorrow

For operation
"get you a raise."

Great, barney.
Real great.

Well, got to go home and
practice up on my strategies.

See you manana.

That barney's
a nice guy.

Heh heh heh heh.

A screwball,
but a nice one.

Good morning.

Mr. Rockefeather
to see mr. Slate

On a very urgent
business matter.

Yes, sir.

Mr. Slate,
a gentleman to see you.

Says it's very urgent.

Send him in,
miss larock.

Oh, boy. Barney must be
in the office right now.

In a few minutes,

Mr. Slate will come out
and tell me about my raise.

Well, mr. Rockefeather,

Fred Flintstone is
a valuable employee of ours,

But if you want
to pay him more money...

I do--A big increase.

I won't stand in his way.
You can have him.

Bu-Bu-But, mr. Slate,

I don't want
to rob you of--

Nonsense, mr. Rockefeather.
I like Fred Flintstone.

I'll tell him
the good news.

"Good news," he says.

Oh, boy.

Hey, Flintstone.
Come here.

Sorry it took me
so long, mr. Slate.

Come into the office,

I've got
good news for you.

With our baby on the way,

A raise would be
the best news, mr. Slate.

You guessed it,

It is a raise.

Oh, thank you very much,
mr. Slate.

Thank you.

Oh, not me, Flintstone.

Mr. Rockefeather over
there is hiring you.

Mr. Sla--


Mr. Rockefeather?

Mr. Flintstone,
I presume.


Well, good-Bye,
mr. Rockefeather.

Good-Bye, Fred.

Mr. Slate, I...

I won't leave you, sir.
I won't.

Loyalty means
more than money.

I won't quit.

I appreciate your
loyalty, Flintstone.

But for
your own good,

You're fired.

No. No!

I want to stay here,
mr. Slate. Here!

Please, mr. Slate!

Security guard,

Please gently escort
Fred Flintstone

Off company property.

Mr. Slate!

I like working
for you, mr. Slate!

You're my hero!


Mr. Rockefeather.

You got me fired.

But, Fred, I played it
like you told me,

But the whole thing

Instead of a raise,

Now I have to tell Wilma
I'm out of work.

Fred, maybe this is
your lucky break.

A lucky break?

Are you
out of your mind?

Let's look in the want ads.

There must be
100 better jobs

A smart guy like you
can get.

Yeah, that's right.

public accountant."

Nah. Too much paperwork.

Uh, "tugboat captain.


"Armature winder.


Short-Order cook."

Hold it. Hold it.
That's it.

What's it?

Short-Order cook.

That's a cinch
of a job

For a guy who likes
fixing food.

Hey, that's right, Fred.

You're a whiz
at backyard barbecues.

Let's see where
that job is.

Oh, yeah, it's at the
brown turban drive-In.

Brown turban drive-In.

That's it.

Not very busy.

I can handle
a place like that.

Ok, Flintstone,
I'll give you a chance.

I'm desperate.

Our chef quit yesterday.

What a cinch.
Everything's handy.

A brontosaurus burger
with a cactusberry malt.

One brontosaurus burger
with a cactusberry malt,

Coming up.

Say, this place isn't
very busy, is it?

Not now,
but it picks up

When the factory over there
lets out for lunch.


Boy, there must be
thousands of people

Working there.

[Factory whistle blows]

The noon whistle.

Oh, no!

[Carhop] roast beef san,
no gravy.

Ham and dodo eggs,
easy over.

Brontodog twice,
with onions.

Pterodactyl giblets.

Make them lean.

Six javas,
cream and sugar.

One saber shake.


Let me outta here!




Service station man."


Service station man.

Yeah. Why not?

Ok, Flintstone.

I briefed you on our
operation policy.

Now here comes
your first customer.

Good luck.

Oh, boy.
My first solo.

How do you do, sir?

He's polite.
That's good.

[Customer] 10 gallons
of ethyl, please.

Yes, sir.

Ok, ethel.
10 gallons.

Gas in--Good.

Checks oil--

Is disgusted because
it's so dirty.

Changes oil--
Very good.

This Flintstone seems
to be alright.

[Car drives off]

Tips hat.
Waves good-Bye.

that's nice.

How did I do, boss?

Not bad, not bad.

Just one
little thing--

You let him get away
without paying!



"Chicken plucker.

Dancing instructor."

But, dad,

There's not one man
in the company

That can
operate the digger.

As manager
of this company,

You should be able

To take over any job
in a pinch.

Now, let's go out there

And I'll teach you
how it's done.

Ok, son,

Push lever one

I said,
lever one!

I did push lever one.

Then try lever two.

Ok, dad.

Lever two.


That's not it,
either, dad.

Try any lever.






It's ruined.

Are you hurt, son?

No, but I have
news for you, dad.

We have to get
Fred Flintstone back again.

Hmm. Yeah. He's got
that digger geared up

So no one else
can run it.

And without
that digger,

We can't
do any business.

That's right.

And it's gonna
cost plenty

To get Flintstone back.

Yeah. Rockefeather
spoils his employees.

Oh, I can
just see Flintstone

In some real
cinchy job right now.

The want ad said,

"Good job
in show business."


[Man] hey, fatso.

You with the broom.

Come here, boy.

How'd you like to
throw away your broom

And be a performer?

Great, colonel.

Good. Come on.

Let's get
into your costume.

Oh, boy.

As the bird man
of razzmatazz,

You fly around
inside the tent,

Swooping down low over
the cheering crowds.

How does
that sound, son?

Swell, but I think
I should mention

I, uh, don't know
how to fly.

Don't worry, son.

We'll get you

Let's make
a trial flight,

And don't forget
to flap your wings.

I won't forget.

Ok, colonel,
I'm ready.


That's the one thing
wrong with this act.

You need a new bird man
for every performance.

Good thing he was a yankee.

There's too many
of them anyway.

I forgot what
the colonel told me

Not to forget.

Oh, oh, yeah, yeah.
Flap your wings.

I'm flying!

I'm flying!



Hey. That sounds
like Fred Flintstone.

Yeah. Yeah,
and there he is.

He's flying.

Oh, that rockefeather
and his secret projects.

Let's get the company
heliocopeter, dad.

We've got to catch him.

Good thinking,
my boy.

Boy, you never know
what you can do

Until you try.

Hey, Flintstone!
Just a minute.

I'd like
to talk to you.

Mr. Slate.

This is too dangerous
a job, Fred,

No matter what rockefeather
is paying you.

Come back to your old job,
mr. Flintstone.

With a big fat raise.

Ok, mr. Slate.

But first,
I'm flying home

To tell Wilma.

Fine, Flintstone.

My best
to the little woman.

Hey, Wilma!

Hello, Fred.

Fred, where are you?

Here, Wilma.

I got a big fat raise.

Now we can get
everything we need

For the baby.

Oh, Fred,
I'm so proud of you.

I must tell Betty
the good news.

Hello, Betty?

Oh, I just had to call
and tell you

That Fred
got his raise.

Yes, he just flew home
and told me.

Flew home?

I'll call you back,

what are you doing

Flying around
in a bird suit?

Wilma, I thought
you'd never ask.

Come inside, sweetheart.

Sit down.
It's a long story,

And, in spots,

Kind of hard to believe.

Hee hee hee hee!

Ha ha ha ha!


Meet the Flintstones

They're the modern
stone age family

From the town
of bedrock

They're a page
right out of history

Someday, maybe Fred

Will win the fight

Then that cat will stay out

For the night

When you're

With the Flintstones

Have a yabba-Dabba-Doo time

A dabba-Doo time

We'll have a gay old time

We'll have a gay old time