The Flintstones (1960–1966): Season 2, Episode 6 - The Rock Quarry Story - full transcript

You gonna have
to excuse me.

My girlfriend and I
are going to Central City

to see our very favorite
film star Rock Quarry.

Aah! It's him!

Fred, Fred! It's him, it's him!
Do you know who that is, Fred?

That's Rock Quarry out there.

[theme music]

[whistles]

[siren]

screech

[music continues]



vroom

bam

thud

thud

smack

Wowie! Did you read this,
Wilma?

Read what?

Rock Quarry will be in Central
City tonight. Listen.

"Rock Quarry, famous film star,
makes personal appearance

at Central Theater tonight."

gasp

Rock Quarry, my very favorite
movie star.

I thought Gary Granite was.

Oh, he is, he is. He's another
of my very favorite.



I've got a lot
of very favorites like

Jimmy Slackney, Tab Boulder

oh-ho, lots of them.

Ha ha, I have too.

But, Rock is my very,
very favorite.

Betty, what do you say

after dinner we drive over
to Central City

and see Rock in person?

Oh, wonderful.

We'll rush the boys
through dinner and take off.

Oh, I never have to rush
Fred through dinner.

He eats as if food is gonna
be declared illegal any minute.

I'll go home and start Barney's
dinner right away.

I'll see you later, Wilma.

- 'Oh, Betty?'
- Ah-huh?

Don't forget
your autograph book.

Don't think I won't bring one.

he he he he

sigh

I can't believe it.

Rock Quarry, so near.

Just over in Central City.

[crowd cheering]
We want Rock! We want Rock!

We want Rock! We want Rock!

We want Rock!

But, I don't understand
why you're beefing, Rock.

Everything is going great.

Oh, sure.

It's bad enough I have to act
in the kinda pictures

you get for me
at Lemon Studios.

But now,
I've to go out on these

personal appearance bushwhacking
junkets, to help sell 'em.

So, what's wrong with that?

I'm sick of being
mauled by crowds.

Everywhere I go, I'm mobbed.

I never have a minute to myself.

Signing autographs,
shaking hands.

'I'm fed up
with all this adulation.'

'I have no privacy.'

I can't even look out
the window.

Watch.

[crowd cheering]

(female # 1)
'Hey, Rock! I love you, Rock!'

(female # 2)
'Throw me a kiss, Rock!'

'Ohhh-hooo!'

See what I mean?
I'm tired of all this.

But you're not tired
of picking up

that fat check every week.

You're not tired of that
heart shaped swimming pool

in Hollyrock.

Maybe you'd like to go back
to being just Gus Schultz

attendant in a gas station
we found you in. Hmm?

But Rock baby, look at me,
we're fighting.

That's not like us.
I love you like a son.

A son? Better than a son.

Who has a son that grosses
four million a picture?

Rocky baby, take a nap.

You got a big night
ahead of you. Seven shows.

Think of me
as your friend, Rock.

Not as the head of a studio

that owns your long term
ironclad contract.

Ha ha, hmm.

'I'll see you later, Rock baby.'

thud

Oh, boy! The star system.

He can say what he wants

but at least at the gas station,
I had friends.

They liked me because I was
just plain Gus Schultz.

Not because I was Rock Quarry,
the movie star.

I gotta get outta this rat race.

I gotta get away
from all of this.

I'll get in the car, drive
to some small town, lose myself.

There's gotta be someplace
where people don't know me.

Some place where
they'll talk to me

without asking for my autograph.

Hello, Lemon Studios?
Rock's gone.

That's what I said,
he disappeared, ran away!

'I want no publicity
on this, understand?'

On this end, I'll say
he had to rush back

to Hollyrock for retakes. You
know how to handle it out there.

I'll keep in touch.
So long.

Oh, boy! How could Rock
do this to me?

It doesn't look good when a star
runs away from his own picture.

Hey, Fred, Fred! There's a
boulevard stop coming up.

Barney, my eyesight
is as good as yours

and I can see that stop sign
as plain as you.

So, I'll ask you to stop being
a backseat driver or I'll..

crash

What's the matter
with you, mister?

Why don't you put your hand out
when you're making a left turn?

A left turn?
I was going straight.

Look, buster, you're at fault
and I can prove it.

I got a disinterested
witness here.

(Fred)
'My neighbor and best friend,
Barney Rubble.'

Tell him, Barney buddy.
Tell him just how it happened.

You drove through
a boulevard stop, Fred.

'And hit that man's car.'

What did I tell you

right through
the boulevard stop and..

'And you hit that man's car.'

Ha ha, I don't understand.

It uh..

It wasn't there yesterday.
Ha ha.

It could happen to anyone.

Think nothing of it.

I'll forget
about it if you will.

Huh? Well, okay.

But, uh, drive a little more
carefully next time

will you bud?

Sure.

And to show you there's
no hard feelings

join me in a cool drink
at the Bedrock juice bar.

Well, thanks.
That sounds great.

You must be a stranger
around here, fella.

I've never seen you before.
Uh, what's your name?

Uh, uh, Gus.
Gus Schultz.

[thinking]
He doesn't know me.

I didn't think
it was possible.

This is great.

Uhh, and what is your name,
mister?

I'm Fred Flintstone
and this is my ex-buddy

and false friend, Barney Rubble.

You went right through
the stop sign.

I'm in the market
for a new best friend.

You gonna be in town long, Gus?

Right through
the stop sign, pow!

You'll get pow
if you don't keep quiet.

Sorry, Gus.
What were you saying?

Well, I just quit a job
and I could stay here.

It seems like a nice, friendly
little town.

Friendly? Gus, I'll show you
how friendly it is.

You're coming home
with me for dinner.

Stop sign.
Car.. Grrr! Pow!

Well, that's the way
it happened, Fred.

Now, what's keeping Fred?

The one night I wanna
do something, he's late.

Well, I'm going over
to see Rock Quarry with Betty

no matter what.

[telephone ringing]

Now, who could that be?

Hello? Oh, it's you, Fred.

Where are you?
Why aren't you home yet?

Listen, honey. Have I got
a nice surprise for you.

I'm bringing home a friend

for one of your
wonderful dinners.

[blabbering angrily]

Is uh, everything alright, Fred?

Sure, she said she'd
be delighted.

Yeah, Wilma,
steaks will be fine, sweetheart.

[blabbering angrily]

We'll be home
in ten minutes, dear.

You know, Fred, maybe you better
not take me home.

Are you kidding? Wilma's anxious
to meet you. Let's go.

Well, okay,
if you say so.

[blabbering angrily]

Oh, boy.

You'll like Wilma, Gus.
She's a lotta laughs.

You're sure she won't mind?

Listen, Gus. We got the
continental system in my house.

The man is boss.

It's my domain
and I am king.

You oughta be, Fred. You've been
crowned enough times.

He he he he.

(Fred)
'Wilma, we're home!'

Come on out and meet
my friend Gus.

Will you step into the kitchen
for a minute, Fred?

Sure, honey. Excuse me
a minute will you, Gus?

Oh, sure.
Go ahead, Fred.

Ah, this is it.
A real home.

Not like those ornate
plushy hotel suites.

This is basic. A man's castle,
his loving wife.

(Wilma)
'I don't care, Fred Flintstone.'

'I'm not cooking meals
for every character'

'you meet at juice bars.'

Shh, Gus will hear you.

Oh, Gus, schmut.
I just won't do it.

Please, Wilma. Nothing fancy.
Gus will take potluck.

(Wilma)
'Potluck, huh?
Okay, here. The pot!'

bang

Now, go out there
and tell Gus to get lost.

Gee, I can't do that, Wilma.

Well, I can. I'll have
no problem at all.

Oh, what's the matter with me?

I'm being downright rude
to Fred's guest.

I'll explain
the situation to him.

And he and Fred can fix
their own dinner.

(Wilma)
'Oh, Mr. Schultz. You're very
welcome to stay for dinner'

but you're going to have
to excuse me.

My girlfriend and I are going
to Central City

to see our very favorite
film star Rock Quarry.

Well, that's quite alright,
Mrs. Flintstone.

Aah! It's him!

thud

It's him, it's him!

Fred, Fred..

bang

Fred, Fred.
It's him, it's him!

Do you know who that is?

Do you know
who's in our house?

Well, of course I know
who it is, it's Gus Schultz.

Gus Schultz? Fred!
That's Rock Quarry out there.

(Fred)
'And, who is Rock Quarry?'

Who is Rock Quarry?
Who is Rock Quarry?

Why, Rock Quarry is one of the
biggest stars in Hollyrock.

Ha ha ha, that's a laugh.

A big Hollyrock star
has nothing else to do

but come here for dinner

be insulted by his host's wife
and eat cold cuts

all because he has
no place else to go.

He can't get a date.
So he has to spend the evening

with Fred Flintstones
at their Bedrock mansion.

Makes a lot of sense,
don't it?

No, it doesn't.

Wilma, you read so many
movie magazines

you think everybody is a star.

Now go on out and chat with Gus
while I fix us some cold cuts.

Okay, Fred.

Gus, did anyone
ever tell you

you look like Rock Quarry
the movie star?

Yep. There must be
a slight resemblance.

A couple of people
have mentioned it.

knock knock

Yu-hoo! Wilma, I've got
my autograph book, let's go.

(Wilma)
'Okay, Betty.'

'But first, I want you
to meet someone, come on in.'

Who is it, Wilma?

'A new friend of Fred's.'

This is my best friend
Betty Rubble.

How do you do,
Mrs. Rubble?

Huh?

Ah! I-it's him!

crash

It's him, it's him!

Wilma..

bang

...it's him!

Hey, what's the matter with her?

(Betty)
'Wilma, Wilma,
come in here, quick.'

That's the meanest thing
I ever heard of, Wilma.

You have Rock Quarry
over here all to yourself

and you don't even call me.

Betty, he is not Rock Quarry.

What do you
take me for, Wilma?

As if anybody could fool me
about Rock Quarry.

Well, I'm gonna
get his autograph

and then I'm going home.

Barney and I are
packing up and moving

from this double crossing
neighborhood.

(Betty)
'And I thought you were
my friend. Some friend!'

giggle

Would you sign my
autograph book, please?

Why, certainly, Mrs. Rubble,
it would be a pleasure.

giggle

Here you are.

Oh, thank you.
I'll always treasure this.

"To Betty Rubble,
from Gus Schultz."

sigh

Gus Schultz?
You are Gus Schultz?

That's my name, Mrs. Rubble.

He had me fooled
for a minute too, Betty.

And if we're gonna see
the real Rock Quarry

we better get started
for Central City.

Gus Schultz.
Can you imagine?

Enjoy yourselves, fellas
and just leave the dishes.

Tata!

I've never seen the girls
act so goofy before.

I guess they're all
keyed up about going

to see what's-his-name,
the movie star.

Yep. I, uh, guess
that's what it is.

Hey, Gus, instead of eating
cold cuts

what do you say
we grab a bite out?

'Like, uh, down
at the bowling alley.'

Swell! And maybe we can
bowl a few games.

Okay. Loser pays
for dinner and bowling.

What's your average?

Well, uh, not too hot.
The last league I bowled in

my average was a 197.

crash

A hundred and ninety seven?

Well, I say we'll have
to get Barney

to come along with us.

'I thought you
were mad at him?'

Mad at Barney? No.
How can I stay mad at him?

He's the only guy I know I can
beat every time at bowling.

And a bowling pigeon
is hard to find.

Hey, Barney, get your
bowling ball.

We're gonna roll a few games.

Quiet, Fred. I got an
important call going here.

Oh, I'm sorry, Barney.
Take your time.

Excuse me, Joe.
Someone just walked in.

Well, like I was saying, Joe

we were driving along

and we come
to this boulevard stop, see?

'But, do we stop? We do not.'

'Fred drives right through
the stop sign. And pow!'

'Right into another car.'

Yeah, that's right.
He didn't even slow down.

Just pow!

(Barney)
'Right smacked
into another car.'

Well, I gotta go now.
Be seeing you, Joe.

My regards to the misses.
So long, Joe.

Come on, Barney,
you're holding up the game.

Okay, okay, Fred.
Don't rush me.

[upbeat music]

zoing

rumble

tink

boom

Huh? Oh, no!

I got nice action
on that one, huh, Fred?

[upbeat music]

Oh, brother!
Another stylist.

Nobody just plain
ol' bowls anymore.

zoing

bam

My hook is working
pretty good today.

And so is your luck, buster.

toing toing

What's the matter, Fred?

My finger must be all swelled
up, it's stuck in the ball.

Oh, I'll get it out, Fred.

A little tap with this
will free it, Fred.

Well, be careful.
Don't knick the ball

I'm still paying on it.

Hold still, Fred.

tink

Works every time, Fred.

Why, you!

thud

Whale on the beach, whale on the
beach, whale on the beach!

He he he.

Ha ha ha.

Whale on the beach,
whale on the beach.

Oh, boy! Someday..
Someday he's gonna go too far.

Look, Wilma. That mob of women
in front of the theater.

They're mad about something.
What's going on?

It sounds like a revolution.
Let's go see.

Don't let 'em get away with it,
girls. We got our rights.

What's happening, miss?

They called the show off,
that's what.

(female#1)
'And we women are gonna
do something about it.'

What are you gonna do?

'We're gonna tear the building
down, brick by brick.'

Okay, girls. Charge!

dash

Here they come.
Now hold tight.

bang bang

(female #1)
'Let us in, let us in!'

Oh..

They're gonna get us, B.L.

Wohey! They'll overrun us
with their bouffant hairdos

and their long, painted nails.

sobbing

Charlie, Charlie, don't!
Get a grip on yourself, Charlie!

Pull yourself together, man.

This is no time
to go to pieces.

[wailing]

bam

Thanks, B.L.,
I needed that.

We'll go down together
like heroes.

We won't have to, I got an idea.

Hold it, hold it out there.

Ah, send in a couple
of representatives

and I'll explain what happened.

You mean Rock Quarry
was suddenly

called back to Hollyrock?

That's right, uh, he had to
make some stupendous retakes.

That's why he's not here.

How do we know
you're telling the truth?

'Well, I'll prove it to you.'

'I'll let you talk
to him yourselves.'

Operator, let me talk
to Rock Quarry

at the Lemon Studios
in Hollyrock, person to person.

Person to person call
for Rock from Central City.

Get that promotion record
from his last picture. Quick!

All set, boss.

(Rock Quarry on gramophone)
'Hello from Hollyrock.'

'This is Rock Quarry speaking
to you.'

It's him, Betty!

'If you liked me
in my last picture..'

We did, Rock.

'...you'll love me in my
new picture, "Rock with Rock."'

(together)
Oh, that sounds great.

'I hope you go
to see my new picture'

'when it plays
at your local theater.'

(together)
We will, we will!

'This is Rock Quarry saying
a fond farewell from Hollyrock.'

sigh

(together)
Goodbye, Rock!

Now, you see? I told you
he was in Hollyrock.

[both sighing]

Ladies, ladies,
I'm talking to you.

After talking to Rock Quarry,
who wants to talk to you?

We had a good evening,
right, fellas?

Yep, swell.

And tomorrow
we'll shoot some pool

that oughta be a lotta fun.

Maybe, uh, maybe he doesn't
know how, Fred.

(Fred)
'Yeah, I know.'

'And we'll get him
into the secret order'

'over at the dinosaur lodge
next week.'

Oh, uh, yeah, sure.

[thinking]
Oh, boy! This being real folks
is not for me.

I'm a star, I miss the crowds,
the adulation

the autographs, the smirk,
the Hollyrock parties.

That's my real life.

I'll tell Fred and Barney
who I am.

They'll get a big kick
out of it.

Fellas,
I have a surprise for you.

'Wilma and Betty were right.
I'm really Rock Quarry.'

[both laughing]

Oh, did you hear that, Barney?
Gus thinks he's Rock Quarry.

Look, fellas.
Don't you know me?

I really am Rock Quarry.

Don't you want my autograph?

No, do you want mine?

ha ha ha

I-I-I am a big star,
loved by millions.

Honest, fellas.

(Fred)
'Look, Gus. You got your laugh,
let it go with that.'

Fred, we're home. And you'll
never guess who we talked to.

All the way
from Hollyrock.

From Hollyrock, who?

(Wilma)
'Rock Quarry.'

Rock Quarry?
You, you couldn't have.

Listen, Gus. Our wives
just said they talked to him.

(Rock)
'But, that's impossible.'

Why do you say
it's impossible, Gus?

Because, I'm Rock Quarry.

ha ha ha

I am. I am!
Honest, I am!

Barney, this guy
is off the deep end.

We gotta get him outta here.

I hate to say this, Gus,
but you better leave.

What?
You're telling me to leave?

A movie star may get
thrown out of nightclubs

but never out of people's homes.

Oh, yeah? Well, you're gonna
get thrown outta this one.

Wait, wait. I can prove
I'm Rock Quarry.

Wait, let him prove it, Fred.

He he he, that should be fun.

(Rock)
'Now, you girls have seen
all my pictures'

'and you know all the parts
I've played.'

I'll go into this room
and come out

in one of my favorite roles.

[chuckles]

I hope I can keep
a straight face.

He he he, me too.

(Rock)
'You remember my big hit,
Dr. Jekyll's Hyde?'

'Well, get a load of this.'

[intense music]

Haaa!

Hehe hehe he he he.

'Great, isn't it?'

ha ha ha

(Wilma)
'Oh, Gus, you kill me.'

Okay, okay.

Maybe you didn't
see that picture.

But you won't miss
the next one.

'Do you remember
The Dancing Playboy?'

[chirpy music]

[all laughing]

I can't stand it.

Stop laughing.
I am Rock Quarry, honest.

'Do you remember Fast Draw Rock,
my great western?'

Well, watch this.

Pow! Pow!

[all laughing]

(Wilma)
'Stop him, I can't stand him.'

Hey, Gus, I bet I'm faster
than you.

Pow, pow, ha ha ha.

Oh ho, boy, what a kook.

I-I am not a kook.

toing

(Fred)
'Alright, that does it, Schultz.
Out, out, out!'

I'll help you, Fred.

(Rock)
'I tell you, I am Rock Quarry,
I am Rock Quarry!'

I am Rock Quarry!

thud

I am so Rock Quarry.

Rock! Rock baby, oh, we've
been looking all over for you.

'Where you been?'

You, you know me,
don't you B.L?

'Of course, baby.
You're Rock Quarry.'

'The great Hollyrock actor.
And here comes your fans.'

(female #1)
'Ah! There he is, girls,
there's Rock Quarry.'

(female #2)
'Give me your autograph, Rock.'

'Oh, I love you, Rock.'

Here you are, miss.

- Sign mine next, Rock.
- I was here first.

Gee, you're great,
Mr. Quarry.

Wilma?

Gosh, Schultz is Rock Quarry!

And he's driving away!
Come back, Rock!

We believe you, we believe you!

Wilma, we had Rock Quarry
right here all to ourselves

and he'd still be here
except for--

Fred and Barney.

Wilma, what are you doing?
Put me down!

Hey, what did I do,
what did I do?

splash splash

Why did the girls
throw us in the pool, Fred?

I don't know, bud.
But something tells me

we oughta stay here
for a while.

Aren't we the ones?

Once in our lifetime
we meet a movie star

and we kick him
outta the house.

We should have
our heads examined.

[doorbell rings]

- I'll see who it is, Betty.
- Okay, Wilma.

Eh, pardon me, miss, I'm looking
for my friend Rock Quarry.

I heard he was here.
My name is Gary Granite.

Gary Granite?
B-B-B-Betty! Betty!

You'll never guess who's here.

Uh, come in,
Mr. Granite, come in!

Ah, it's wonderful talking
to you like this, Mr. Granite.

'It's my pleasure, ladies.'

We had Rock Quarry here,
and we didn't even know it.

Can you imagine?

tringg

(Wilma)
'Flintstone residence.'

'Yes, he's here.'

It's for you, Gary.
Here.

Oh, hello, Ingrid.

Ah. I'm sorry, I can't.

I'm all tied up
for the moment.

He's not kidding, Betty.

And it could be
for a long moment.

Right. We're not letting
this one go.

(both)
Ha ha ha.

[theme music]

[yawns]

Wilma!

(Fred)
'Wilma!'

'Come on, Wilma,
open this door.'

'Wilma!'