The Facts of Life (1979–1988): Season 5, Episode 20 - Dream Marriage - full transcript
Blair dreams of what her life might be like in the year 2000.
♪ YOU TAKE THE GOOD,
YOU TAKE THE BAD ♪
♪ YOU TAKE 'EM BOTH
AND THERE YOU HAVE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THERE'S A TIME YOU
GOTTA GO AND SHOW ♪
♪ YOU'RE GROWIN'
NOW YOU KNOW ABOUT ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ WHEN THE WORLD NEVER SEEMS ♪
♪ TO BE LIVIN' UP
TO YOUR DREAMS ♪
♪ AND SUDDENLY
YOU'RE FINDIN' OUT ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF
LIFE ARE ALL ABOUT ♪
♪ YOU ♪
♪ YOU ♪
♪ IT TAKES A LOT
TO GET 'EM RIGHT ♪
♪ WHEN YOU'RE LEARNIN'
THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ LEARNIN' THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ LEARNIN' THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪♪
♪ CINDERELLA, CINDERELLA ♪
CLIFF!
HONEY, I WAS IN THE MIDDLE
OF WATCHING A BYPASS,
AND I JUST GOT THE
NEWS, IT'S UNBELIEVABLE.
I'M NOT HOME, DON'T LOOK AT ME.
YOU ARE GORGEOUS.
OH, JUST WAIT UNTIL
YOU HEAR THIS NEWS.
YOU BETTER SIT DOWN.
NO, STAND UP.
UNLESS YOU WANT TO SIT DOWN.
CLIFF, TELL ME.
DALLAS GENERAL INTERN PROGRAM.
ME, INTERN, DALLAS GENERAL.
SWEETHEART, THAT'S WONDERFUL!
YOU UNDERSTOOD THAT?
OF COURSE.
THAT'S TERRIFIC NEWS.
UNLESS DALLAS
GENERAL'S IN DALLAS.
I KNOW, I KNOW,
BUT WE WON'T HAVE
TO BE SEPARATED.
BLAIR, I'VE GOT
SOMETHING TO ASK YOU.
I WANT YOU TO MARRY ME.
MAYBE I BETTER SIT DOWN.
I WANT TO SPEND THE
REST OF MY LIFE WITH YOU.
CLIFF!
WELL, THEY TELL ME AT MED SCHOOL
THAT I HAVE A TERRIFIC
FUTURE AS A CHEST CUTTER...
AND I WANT TO SHARE
THAT FUTURE WITH YOU.
THIS IS ALL VERY SUDDEN.
IS DALLAS THE PROBLEM?
NO, NO, NO, DALLAS IS FINE.
TWO OF MY BEST
FRIENDS ARE THERE...
NEIMAN AND MARCUS.
WELL, AM I THE PROBLEM?
DO YOU WANT TO LOOK
AROUND A LITTLE MORE?
THE ONLY PLACE I
ONLY WANT TO LOOK
IS INTO YOUR
BEAUTIFUL BLUE EYES.
I JUST THINK WE NEED
TO TALK ABOUT THIS...
SLOWLY.
SO DO I.
WHAT'S YOUR DECISION?
BLAIR WINFIELD.
I ALWAYS WANTED TO MARRY A MAN
WHO WOULDN'T MAKE ME
CHANGE MY MONOGRAM.
IS THAT A YES?
CLIFF... HEY, THINK ABOUT IT.
I'LL GIVE YOU TILL TOMORROW.
7:00 A.M. OKAY?
I'M ON DUTY TILL THEN.
OKAY. GOOD.
YOU SLEEP ON IT, AND WE'LL MEET
TOMORROW MORNING
FOR AN EARLY BREAKFAST.
MWAH.
AND I KNOW YOUR
ANSWER'S GOING TO BE YES,
AND WE'LL BE VERY, VERY HAPPY.
NATALIE, I'M HAVING SOME TROUBLE
WITH MY MONOLOGUE
FROM "OUR TOWN."
WILL YOU CUE ME?
"OUR TOWN," A CLASSIC.
IT'LL BE PERFECT FOR MY TIME
CAPSULE FOR HISTORY CLASS.
THEY'LL HAVE TO WAIT TILL
I LEARN MY LINES, NATALIE.
KIDS, HOLD IT DOWN!
I'M DOING MICROSURGERY
ON MY CARBURETOR HERE.
MOTHER SAYS HELLO TO ALL.
SHE HAD TO HAVE
SAID MORE THAN THAT.
YOU'VE BEEN BURNING
UP THE WIRES ALL NIGHT.
JUST GIRL TALK,
MOTHER-DAUGHTER STUFF.
MAKING PLANS.
NOTHING IMPORTANT.
BLAIR, DO YOU
REALIZE IN 16 YEARS,
WE WILL BE ALIVE TO WITNESS
THE TURN OF THE CENTURY?
IF YOU DON'T TALK
US TO DEATH FIRST.
THE YEAR 2000.
WOW.
BLAIR, WHAT DO YOU THINK
YOUR LIFE WILL BE LIKE THEN?
WELL... OH, WAIT.
TIME CAPSULE
ENTRY... BLAIR WARNER.
I KNOW, IN THE YEAR 2000,
I WILL BE VERY, VERY HAPPY.
OH, GOOD, NOW
WE'LL ALL REST EASY.
I MEAN, WHAT WILL
YOU BE IN 16 YEARS?
35.
THAT'S NOT QUITE WHAT I MEANT.
SEE... I'VE DECIDED
I'LL BECOME A WRITER,
LOVER, GOURMET COOK,
COMPUTER EXPERT, SPACE TRAVELER.
THIS IS A PARTIAL LIST.
NATALIE, NOBODY CAN
DO ALL THOSE THINGS.
WHY NOT? I AM WOMAN.
WOULD YOU BE A QUIETER ONE?
NATALIE, WHAT ABOUT
BEING SOMEONE'S WIFE?
BLAIR, THAT'S UNDERSTOOD.
BUT WHAT ABOUT YOUR LIFE?
YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT
STUDYING ART AT THE SORBONNE
OR FASHION DESIGN IN NEW YORK.
THAT WAS JUST ALL
SOMETHING TO DO
UNTIL THE RIGHT MAN CAME ALONG.
THAT'S A WONDERFUL ATTITUDE.
THANK YOU.
FOR 1842.
BLAIR, YOU'RE POINTED
IN THE WRONG DIRECTION.
YOU SHOULD BE MOVING FORWARD.
HEY, TOOT, WHAT DO
YOU SEE FOR YOURSELF?
I HAVE ONLY ONE HUMBLE
GOAL FOR THE YEAR 2000...
TO BE A STAR, THE FIRST
LADY OF BROADWAY.
IF THERE IS A BROADWAY.
THERE'LL ALWAYS BE A BROADWAY.
IF NOT HERE, THEN
IN ANOTHER GALAXY
FAR, FAR AWAY.
JO!
WHAT WILL YOU BE
DOING IN THE YEAR 2000?
WORKING ON THIS
STUPID CARBURETOR.
GIRLS, IT'S LATE!
EITHER GO TO SLEEP OR TELL
ME WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
WE'RE TALKING ABOUT OUR FUTURES.
MRS. GARRETT, HOW DO YOU
PLAN TO ENTER THE 21ST CENTURY?
IN GOOD HEALTH, I HOPE,
AND DEFINITELY AS A REDHEAD.
YOU KNOW, THE FOOD BUSINESS
IS GONNA CHANGE A LOT.
YOUR QUICHE DAYS ARE NUMBERED.
NATALIE, I'LL BE JUST FINE.
PEOPLE WILL ALWAYS APPRECIATE
QUALITY QUICHE AND CROISSANT
PREPARED IN THE
OLD-FASHIONED WAY.
GOOD LUCK.
SUMMING UP HERE, SO
WE CAN ALL GO TO SLEEP,
MRS. G IS GONNA BE
THE QUEEN OF QUICHE,
TOOTIE'S GONNA ACT,
NATALIE'S GONNA
DO EVERYTHING ELSE,
AND BLAIR IS NOT
GONNA DO ANYTHING,
BUT SHE'S GONNA
BE VERY, VERY HAPPY.
I RESENT THAT.
BEING HAPPY IS A FULL-TIME JOB.
WHAT ARE YOU
GONNA BE DOING THEN?
GIVING A LUBE JOB
TO A ROCKET BIKE?
YEAH, IF I WANT.
I CAN DO ANYTHING.
I COULD EVEN BE PRESIDENT.
AND IF YOU'RE A DEMOCRAT,
I'LL VOTE FOR YOU.
IN THE MEANTIME, LET'S
ALL GET SOME SLEEP.
GOOD IDEA, I HAVE
TO GET UP EARLY.
I'M HAVING BREAKFAST WITH CLIFF.
WE HAVE A LOT WE
NEED TO DISCUSS.
MM.
GOOD NIGHT.
Natalie: OH, WAIT!
I'VE GOT A GREAT IDEA.
LET'S ALL MAKE A PACT
TO MEET RIGHT HERE
TO START OFF THE NEW
CENTURY AND COMPARE NOTES.
NO.
NO, I LIKE THE
IDEA. LET'S DO IT.
GOOD NIGHT.
Natalie: OH, WAIT!
LET'S ALL HOLD HANDS
AND MAKE A PLEDGE.
I HATE IT WHEN
YOU GET LIKE THIS.
COME ON.
WE ALL PROMISE TO MEET HERE,
JANUARY 1ST OF THE YEAR 2000,
TO START OFF THE NEW
CENTURY TOGETHER.
RIGHT. All: RIGHT!
AND LISTEN... NAT, THAT'S IT.
I WAS JUST GONNA ASK MRS.
GARRETT TO TURN OFF THE LIGHT.
GOOD NIGHT, GIRLS.
SEE YOU ALL IN THE YEAR 2000.
YEAH, YEAH.
Natalie: AND BLAIR, TRY
TO BE HERE ON TIME, OKAY?
I'D SAY AROUND
NOON WOULD BE GOOD.
GEE, I HOPE IT'S A NICE DAY.
I'D HATE TO START OFF THE
NEW CENTURY IN GALOSHES.
HELLO?
I'M ON TIME.
MRS. GARRETT, I'M
BACK FOR THE REUNION.
SHE STILL SELLS
CROISSANT AND QUICHE.
GOOD, NOTHING'S CHANGED.
RELEASE CROISSANT.
RELEASE CROISSANT.
SHOPLIFTERS WILL BE PROSECUTED.
SORRY.
BLAIR!
IT'S SO GOOD TO SEE YOU!
OH, HAPPY NEW CENTURY!
SAME TO YOU, MRS. GARRETT.
YOU LOOK MARVELOUS.
YOU... YOU HAVEN'T
CHANGED A BIT.
OH, LOOK, I WANT TO
APOLOGIZE FOR L.C.
L.C.?
YES, MY LASER COMPUTER.
SOMETIMES, IT GETS SO CRANKY.
HOW'S DALLAS?
DALLAS IS WONDERFUL.
I'M VERY, VERY HAPPY.
BUT LOOK AT YOUR SHOP!
WHAT'S HAPPENED
TO EDNA'S EDIBLES?
IT'S NOT EDNA'S EDIBLES ANYMORE.
IT'S EDNA'S EDIBLES AND
ADVICE INTERNATIONAL.
I SELL QUICHE AND SOLVE
PROBLEMS ALL OVER THE WORLD.
BUT I'VE KEPT MY
WORLD HEADQUARTERS
RIGHT HERE IN PEEKSKILL.
YOU'RE STILL SUCH A DYNAMO.
NO GRASS GROWS UNDER MY FEET.
BUT THEN, NO GRASS
GROWS ANYWHERE ANYMORE.
TWO LIFE FORMS
APPROACHING THE SIDEWALK.
NATALIE AND 2-T.
NO, THAT'S TOOTIE, NOT 2-T.
SHE THINKS EVERYONE'S A ROBOT.
HAPPY NEW CENTURY!
NATALIE! YOU LOOK FABULOUS.
THANK YOU.
MRS. GARRETT.
OH, MY TOOTIE.
BEAUTIFUL.
BLAIR!
YOU TWO LOOK MARVELOUS.
WE DO, DON'T WE?
WHERE'S JO?
UH, SHE'S COMING LATER.
WHAT'S JO DOING
THESE DAYS, ANYWAY?
WHAT'S JO DOING?
BLAIR, YOU KNOW.
NO, I DON'T, TELL ME.
OH, BLAIR, EVERYONE KNOWS
WHAT'S HAPPENED TO JO.
I DON'T.
WELL, YOU'RE GOING
TO BE SO SURPRISED.
I DON'T WANT TO BE SURPRISED.
TELL ME.
TELL ME! TELL ME
WHAT'S HAPPENED TO JO.
OH, TOOTIE. MRS. GARRETT.
YOU LOOK ABSOLUTELY EXQUISITE.
YOUR CAREER IS FABULOUS...
I CAN'T BELIEVE WE'RE
ALL TOGETHER AGAIN.
WELL, SOME OF US AREN'T.
I THINK I HAD ONE TOO
MANY MARTIAN WALLBANGERS
AT THE CAST PARTY LAST NIGHT.
HOW DID THE SHOW GO?
OH, THE AUDIENCE LOVED ME.
I DON'T CARE WHAT
THEY SAY ABOUT MARS.
THERE IS INTELLIGENT LIFE THERE.
I BET YOU WERE DOING
"OUR TOWN," WEREN'T YOU?
OH-HO, "OUR TOWN"?
GOODNESS, NO, DEARY.
I HAVEN'T DONE THAT
SINCE HIGH SCHOOL.
TRY THIS FOR YOUR
SPACE-LAG, TOOTIE,
SOME GOOD OLD-FASHIONED COCOA.
YOU'RE STILL A
LIFESAVER, MRS. GARRETT.
WELL, PAUL AND I HAD A
REASONABLY QUIET NEW YEAR'S EVE
ON OUR MOUNTAIN IN SANTA FE,
AS QUIET AS IT CAN GET
WHEN YOU HAVE SEVEN KIDS.
YOU'VE HAD SEVEN CHILDREN?
I HAVEN'T SHOWN YOU MY KIDS?
JUST PRESS THE BUTTON.
WELL, FIRST, WE HAD THE
TWINS, ERNEST AND JULIO.
THEN WE ADOPTED
MEI LING, DIMITRI,
FRANCESCA, AND YOSHIKO.
THEN, AFTER MY FIFTH BOOK
WAS PUBLISHED, WE CELEBRATED,
AND ALONG CAME PAUL, JR.
HOW DO YOU MANAGE TO WRITE
WITH SEVEN KIDS IN THE HOUSE?
OH, I JUST SAY WHAT MRS.
GARRETT USED TO SAY.
"QUIET!"
BLAIR, HOW MANY CHILDREN
DO YOU AND CLIFF HAVE NOW?
I HAVE A GIRL.
AND A BOY.
YES, I HAVE ONE OF EACH.
I HAVE EVERYTHING.
I'M VERY, VERY HAPPY.
WHOOPS, THERE
GOES MY ADVICE LINE.
EXCUSE ME, GIRLS,
SOMEONE'S IN TROUBLE IN, UH...
UGANDA.
EDNA'S EDIBLES AND ADVICE.
OH, NOW, PLEASE, I
CAN'T UNDERSTAND
A THING WHEN YOU'RE CRYING.
YES, AKUBA.
YOU SAY HE STOLE YOUR GOAT?
OH, MAYBE HE WAS JUST
TRYING TO GET YOUR ATTENTION.
OH, WELL, DID YOU TALK
OUT YOUR FEELINGS?
WAIT, I'M GONNA PUT YOU
ON HOLD FOR A SECOND.
OH, I THINK I'D BETTER
FINISH THE CALL IN THERE.
I NEED TO BE SITTING IN
MY TRANSLATOR MODULE.
WELL, WHERE WERE WE?
HAVING A WONDERFUL REUNION.
OH, BLAIR, I ALMOST FORGOT.
I BROUGHT YOU A COPY
OF MY LATEST BOOK.
A FLOPPY DISK?
YES, I'M OLD-FASHIONED.
I DON'T BELIEVE IN SWALLOWING
THOSE NEW BOOK CAPSULES.
I ALMOST CHOKED
ON "WAR AND PEACE."
"TO BLAIR, MY GIRLHOOD IDOL."
AW, NATALIE.
YOU'RE SUCH A MARVEL.
YEAH, WELL...
WELL, ENOUGH ABOUT US.
WHAT'S NEW WITH YOU, BLAIR?
WELL, CLIFF IS JUST THE
MOST WONDERFUL HUSBAND,
AS WELL AS A
WORLD-FAMOUS CHEST CUTTER.
OF COURSE, WHO HASN'T HEARD
OF THE WINFIELD
TITANIUM TURBO-HEART?
BUT WHAT'S NEW WITH YOU, BLAIR?
WELL, I'M VERY, VERY HAPPY.
WHAT'S THAT AWFUL NOISE?
SOME THINGS NEVER CHANGE.
YOU USED TO SAY THAT
ABOUT JO'S MOTORBIKE.
NOW, IT'S JO'S "ROCKET-COPTER!"
JO'S A ROCKET-COPTER PILOT.
WOULDN'T YOU KNOW IT?
HI, GUYS.
HI.
OH, I'M SORRY I'M LATE.
OH, MRS. G!
NOBODY HUGS LIKE MRS. G HUGS.
I BROUGHT YOU A PRESENT.
I'M SURE YOUR L.C. IS READY
FOR A LUBE JOB BY NOW.
THANKS.
IT DEMANDED ONE THIS MORNING.
BLAIR. JO!
BLAIR, YOU HAVEN'T
CHANGED A BIT.
HOW ARE YOU?
VERY, VERY HAPPY.
THAT'S GOOD.
YOU LOOK... SMASHING.
EXACTLY.
SINCE WHEN DO YOU
DRESS FOR SUCCESS?
SINCE I BECAME ONE.
AT WHAT?
STOP PRETENDING YOU DON'T KNOW.
I'M NOT PRETENDING.
PLEASE, SOMEONE TELL
ME WHAT'S HAPPENED TO JO.
GUESS WHO'S BEEN MADE
PRESIDENT OF WARNER INDUSTRIES?
NO BIG DEAL.
THAT'S MY FATHER'S COMPANY.
WHY DIDN'T HE ASK
ME TO BE PRESIDENT?
WELL, HE TRIED TO
REACH YOU, BLAIR,
BUT YOU WERE OUT
SHOPPING AT NEIMAN MARCUS...
FOR THREE MONTHS.
I REMEMBER.
SLIPCOVERS.
THE ACQUISITION PAPERS ARE
READY FOR YOUR SIGNATURE, J.P.
THANK YOU, PHILIP.
AND LET'S SET UP A
LITTLE LUNCH THING
AT THE 21 CLUB FOR THE
PRESS ANNOUNCEMENT.
RIGHT, J.P.
WE'RE ARRANGING A FEW TAKEOVERS.
WE'RE BUYING CALVIN KLEIN,
GLORIA VANDERBILT, AND KAWASAKI.
YOU'VE BEEN BUSY.
KEEPS ME OFF THE STREETS.
WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN UP TO?
WELL, I... I...
OH, SHE'S BEEN VERY, VERY HAPPY.
YES, I'M VERY, VERY HAPPY.
GIRLS, I WOULD LIKE TO
PROPOSE A COCOA TOAST.
THIS IS A VERY SPECIAL OCCASION.
PLANNED AND ARRANGED
BY NATALIE GREEN...
HYPHEN WEBSTER.
HERE'S TO US, TOGETHER AGAIN,
ABOUT TO CELEBRATE THE
TURN OF A NEW CENTURY!
WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.
I JUST HAD ANOTHER ONE
OF MY BRILLIANT IDEAS.
PERFECT!
THAT JUST ABOUT
COMPLETES THE OCCASION.
WHY DON'T ALL STAY WITH
MRS. GARRETT FOR A WHILE?
WE COULD SLEEP IN OUR
OLD BEDS IN OUR OLD ROOM,
AND WE CAN MAKE POPCORN,
AND STAY UP TALKING ALL NIGHT.
WOULDN'T THAT BE GREAT?
GREAT, BUT WHO HAS THE TIME?
I DO.
WELL, I'VE GOT A PERFORMANCE
TONIGHT AT THE WHITE HOUSE.
YOU'RE PERFORMING
FOR THE PRESIDENT?
YES, SHE LOVES MY WORK.
TOOTIE, TAKE ME WITH YOU.
LET ME BE YOUR SET DESIGNER.
BLAIR, DEAR, I DON'T KNOW.
REMEMBER THE PALM TREES
I MADE FOR "SOUTH PACIFIC"?
HOW COULD WE FORGET?
I STILL HAVE YOUR SKETCHBOOK.
OH, LOOKS LIKE YOU HAVEN'T
WORKED IN THIS FOR A LONG TIME.
SEE THE PALM TREES?
OH, AND JO,
REMEMBER WHEN I TRIED
TO REDESIGN THE
EASTLAND UNIFORMS?
MAYBE I COULD COME TO
WORK FOR WARNER INDUSTRIES.
OH, BLAIR, THIS SHOWS GREAT
PROMISE FOR A BEGINNER,
BUT WHAT HAVE YOU DONE LATELY?
IT'S TOO LATE.
BUT, JO... YOU KNOW,
YOU REALLY DID
HAVE TALENT BACK THEN, BLAIR,
BUT YOU NEVER DEVELOPED IT.
NOW, IT'S TOO LATE.
NATALIE, REMEMBER WHAT
A GREAT ILLUSTRATOR I WAS?
WE COULD BE A TEAM.
YOU WRITE, AND I DRAW.
HERE'S A SKETCH OF
YOU I DID IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I LIKE MY HAIR MUCH BETTER NOW.
SORRY, BLAIR, IT'S TOO LATE.
MRS. GARRETT, YOU
STILL BELIEVE IN ME.
LET ME WORK HERE,
I'LL DO ANYTHING.
OH, BLAIR, I'D LOVE TO HAVE
YOU BACK HERE WITH ME...
OH, THANK YOU, THANK YOU.
IF L.C. APPROVES OF
YOUR QUALIFICATIONS.
L.C.?
YES, MRS. G?
IS IT OKAY IF I HIRE BLAIR
TO HELP ME AROUND...
IT'S TOO LATE.
IT'S NOT TOO LATE!
All: IT'S TOO LATE.
I'VE GOT TALENT, I'LL
DO SOMETHING WITH IT.
IT'S NOT TOO LATE.
BLAIR, YOU'RE GONNA BE LATE.
IT'S NOT TOO LATE!
ALL RIGHT, FINE, KEEP SLEEPING.
YOU SAID LAST NIGHT YOU
WANTED TO GET UP EARLY.
THAT'S RIGHT.
IT'S 1984, ISN'T IT?
VERY GOOD.
NOW, YOU WANNA GUESS
WHAT PLANET WE'RE ON?
NO, I HAVE A MILLION
THINGS TO DO.
GOOD-BYE TO CLOCKS
TICKING, AND... AND...
I'M NEVER GONNA GET
THIS MONOLOGUE RIGHT.
TOOTIE, DON'T BE SO
HARD ON YOURSELF.
SOMEDAY, YOU'LL BE
PERFORMING AT THE WHITE HOUSE.
THANKS FOR THE VOTE
OF CONFIDENCE, BLAIR.
NATALIE, YOU'RE SUCH A MARVEL.
I WANT TO BE JUST LIKE YOU.
THAT'S NICE.
I'M JUST GONNA GO TAKE
MY TURN IN THE SHOWER NOW.
ALL RIGHT, I DID IT.
LIKE I ALWAYS SAY, THE EARLY
BIRD FIXES THE CARBURETOR.
GOOD FOR YOU, JO!
YOU WERE BORN TO
FIX CARBURETORS.
DON'T EVER FORGET THAT.
AND LISTEN...
STAY AWAY FROM MY
FATHER'S BUSINESS.
GOOD MORNING!
MRS. GARRETT, CAN
I USE YOUR SHOWER?
I HAVE A MILLION THINGS TO
DO, AND NATALIE'S USING OURS.
I WANT TO LOOK INTO
A SUMMER ART COURSE
AND CHECK OUT
SOME NEW ELECTIVES...
AND DON'T FORGET YOU'RE
MEETING CLIFF FOR BREAKFAST.
YEAH, WE HAVE A LOT TO DISCUSS.
YOU UNDERSTAND
THAT TURNING YOU DOWN
HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU.
YOU KISS ME LIKE THAT
AGAIN, AND I'LL BE CONVINCED.
IT'S JUST IN THE MIDDLE
OF THAT DREAM, I REALIZED...
I HAD NO IDEA WHO I
WAS OR WHAT I WANTED.
I CAN'T REALLY BE A GOOD WIFE
UNTIL I KNOW MORE ABOUT MYSELF.
WELL, I CAN'T ARGUE
WITH THAT, BUT...
IT'S SURE GONNA BE LONELY
IN DALLAS WITHOUT YOU.
IT'S GONNA BE LONELY
IN PEEKSKILL TOO.
BUT WE'LL WRITE TWICE A DAY,
AND WE'LL TALK
THREE TIMES A DAY.
AND DON'T WORRY ABOUT THE BILLS.
I OWN STOCK IN THE
PHONE COMPANY.
THEN WE'RE STILL GOING TOGETHER?
ABSOLUTELY.
WHAT DO YOU SAY WE GET SOME
BREAKFAST AT THE COPPER SKILLET?
GREAT, I'M STARVED.
AW, DARN, IT'S ALMOST 9:00.
AH, IT'S TOO LATE FOR
THE EARLY BIRD SPECIAL.
DON'T SAY THAT.
WHAT? IT'S NOT TOO LATE.
COME ON, WE'LL RUN.
♪ YOU'LL AVOID A LOT OF DAMAGE ♪
♪ AND ENJOY THE
FUN OF MANAGING ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THEY SHED A LOT OF LIGHT ♪
♪ IF YOU HEAR 'EM
FROM YOUR BROTHER ♪
♪ BETTER CLEAR 'EM
WITH YOUR MOTHER ♪
♪ BETTER GET 'EM RIGHT ♪
♪ CALL HER LATE AT NIGHT ♪
♪ YOU GOT THE FUTURE IN
THE PALM OF YOUR HAND ♪
♪ ALL YOU GOTTA DO TO GET
YOU THROUGH IS UNDERSTAND ♪
♪ YOU THINK YOU'D
RATHER DO WITHOUT ♪
♪ YOU'LL NEVER MAKE IT THROUGH ♪
♪ WITHOUT THE TRUTH ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE
ARE ALL ABOUT YOU ♪
♪ LEARNING THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
YOU TAKE THE BAD ♪
♪ YOU TAKE 'EM BOTH
AND THERE YOU HAVE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THERE'S A TIME YOU
GOTTA GO AND SHOW ♪
♪ YOU'RE GROWIN'
NOW YOU KNOW ABOUT ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ WHEN THE WORLD NEVER SEEMS ♪
♪ TO BE LIVIN' UP
TO YOUR DREAMS ♪
♪ AND SUDDENLY
YOU'RE FINDIN' OUT ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF
LIFE ARE ALL ABOUT ♪
♪ YOU ♪
♪ YOU ♪
♪ IT TAKES A LOT
TO GET 'EM RIGHT ♪
♪ WHEN YOU'RE LEARNIN'
THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ LEARNIN' THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ LEARNIN' THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪♪
♪ CINDERELLA, CINDERELLA ♪
CLIFF!
HONEY, I WAS IN THE MIDDLE
OF WATCHING A BYPASS,
AND I JUST GOT THE
NEWS, IT'S UNBELIEVABLE.
I'M NOT HOME, DON'T LOOK AT ME.
YOU ARE GORGEOUS.
OH, JUST WAIT UNTIL
YOU HEAR THIS NEWS.
YOU BETTER SIT DOWN.
NO, STAND UP.
UNLESS YOU WANT TO SIT DOWN.
CLIFF, TELL ME.
DALLAS GENERAL INTERN PROGRAM.
ME, INTERN, DALLAS GENERAL.
SWEETHEART, THAT'S WONDERFUL!
YOU UNDERSTOOD THAT?
OF COURSE.
THAT'S TERRIFIC NEWS.
UNLESS DALLAS
GENERAL'S IN DALLAS.
I KNOW, I KNOW,
BUT WE WON'T HAVE
TO BE SEPARATED.
BLAIR, I'VE GOT
SOMETHING TO ASK YOU.
I WANT YOU TO MARRY ME.
MAYBE I BETTER SIT DOWN.
I WANT TO SPEND THE
REST OF MY LIFE WITH YOU.
CLIFF!
WELL, THEY TELL ME AT MED SCHOOL
THAT I HAVE A TERRIFIC
FUTURE AS A CHEST CUTTER...
AND I WANT TO SHARE
THAT FUTURE WITH YOU.
THIS IS ALL VERY SUDDEN.
IS DALLAS THE PROBLEM?
NO, NO, NO, DALLAS IS FINE.
TWO OF MY BEST
FRIENDS ARE THERE...
NEIMAN AND MARCUS.
WELL, AM I THE PROBLEM?
DO YOU WANT TO LOOK
AROUND A LITTLE MORE?
THE ONLY PLACE I
ONLY WANT TO LOOK
IS INTO YOUR
BEAUTIFUL BLUE EYES.
I JUST THINK WE NEED
TO TALK ABOUT THIS...
SLOWLY.
SO DO I.
WHAT'S YOUR DECISION?
BLAIR WINFIELD.
I ALWAYS WANTED TO MARRY A MAN
WHO WOULDN'T MAKE ME
CHANGE MY MONOGRAM.
IS THAT A YES?
CLIFF... HEY, THINK ABOUT IT.
I'LL GIVE YOU TILL TOMORROW.
7:00 A.M. OKAY?
I'M ON DUTY TILL THEN.
OKAY. GOOD.
YOU SLEEP ON IT, AND WE'LL MEET
TOMORROW MORNING
FOR AN EARLY BREAKFAST.
MWAH.
AND I KNOW YOUR
ANSWER'S GOING TO BE YES,
AND WE'LL BE VERY, VERY HAPPY.
NATALIE, I'M HAVING SOME TROUBLE
WITH MY MONOLOGUE
FROM "OUR TOWN."
WILL YOU CUE ME?
"OUR TOWN," A CLASSIC.
IT'LL BE PERFECT FOR MY TIME
CAPSULE FOR HISTORY CLASS.
THEY'LL HAVE TO WAIT TILL
I LEARN MY LINES, NATALIE.
KIDS, HOLD IT DOWN!
I'M DOING MICROSURGERY
ON MY CARBURETOR HERE.
MOTHER SAYS HELLO TO ALL.
SHE HAD TO HAVE
SAID MORE THAN THAT.
YOU'VE BEEN BURNING
UP THE WIRES ALL NIGHT.
JUST GIRL TALK,
MOTHER-DAUGHTER STUFF.
MAKING PLANS.
NOTHING IMPORTANT.
BLAIR, DO YOU
REALIZE IN 16 YEARS,
WE WILL BE ALIVE TO WITNESS
THE TURN OF THE CENTURY?
IF YOU DON'T TALK
US TO DEATH FIRST.
THE YEAR 2000.
WOW.
BLAIR, WHAT DO YOU THINK
YOUR LIFE WILL BE LIKE THEN?
WELL... OH, WAIT.
TIME CAPSULE
ENTRY... BLAIR WARNER.
I KNOW, IN THE YEAR 2000,
I WILL BE VERY, VERY HAPPY.
OH, GOOD, NOW
WE'LL ALL REST EASY.
I MEAN, WHAT WILL
YOU BE IN 16 YEARS?
35.
THAT'S NOT QUITE WHAT I MEANT.
SEE... I'VE DECIDED
I'LL BECOME A WRITER,
LOVER, GOURMET COOK,
COMPUTER EXPERT, SPACE TRAVELER.
THIS IS A PARTIAL LIST.
NATALIE, NOBODY CAN
DO ALL THOSE THINGS.
WHY NOT? I AM WOMAN.
WOULD YOU BE A QUIETER ONE?
NATALIE, WHAT ABOUT
BEING SOMEONE'S WIFE?
BLAIR, THAT'S UNDERSTOOD.
BUT WHAT ABOUT YOUR LIFE?
YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT
STUDYING ART AT THE SORBONNE
OR FASHION DESIGN IN NEW YORK.
THAT WAS JUST ALL
SOMETHING TO DO
UNTIL THE RIGHT MAN CAME ALONG.
THAT'S A WONDERFUL ATTITUDE.
THANK YOU.
FOR 1842.
BLAIR, YOU'RE POINTED
IN THE WRONG DIRECTION.
YOU SHOULD BE MOVING FORWARD.
HEY, TOOT, WHAT DO
YOU SEE FOR YOURSELF?
I HAVE ONLY ONE HUMBLE
GOAL FOR THE YEAR 2000...
TO BE A STAR, THE FIRST
LADY OF BROADWAY.
IF THERE IS A BROADWAY.
THERE'LL ALWAYS BE A BROADWAY.
IF NOT HERE, THEN
IN ANOTHER GALAXY
FAR, FAR AWAY.
JO!
WHAT WILL YOU BE
DOING IN THE YEAR 2000?
WORKING ON THIS
STUPID CARBURETOR.
GIRLS, IT'S LATE!
EITHER GO TO SLEEP OR TELL
ME WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
WE'RE TALKING ABOUT OUR FUTURES.
MRS. GARRETT, HOW DO YOU
PLAN TO ENTER THE 21ST CENTURY?
IN GOOD HEALTH, I HOPE,
AND DEFINITELY AS A REDHEAD.
YOU KNOW, THE FOOD BUSINESS
IS GONNA CHANGE A LOT.
YOUR QUICHE DAYS ARE NUMBERED.
NATALIE, I'LL BE JUST FINE.
PEOPLE WILL ALWAYS APPRECIATE
QUALITY QUICHE AND CROISSANT
PREPARED IN THE
OLD-FASHIONED WAY.
GOOD LUCK.
SUMMING UP HERE, SO
WE CAN ALL GO TO SLEEP,
MRS. G IS GONNA BE
THE QUEEN OF QUICHE,
TOOTIE'S GONNA ACT,
NATALIE'S GONNA
DO EVERYTHING ELSE,
AND BLAIR IS NOT
GONNA DO ANYTHING,
BUT SHE'S GONNA
BE VERY, VERY HAPPY.
I RESENT THAT.
BEING HAPPY IS A FULL-TIME JOB.
WHAT ARE YOU
GONNA BE DOING THEN?
GIVING A LUBE JOB
TO A ROCKET BIKE?
YEAH, IF I WANT.
I CAN DO ANYTHING.
I COULD EVEN BE PRESIDENT.
AND IF YOU'RE A DEMOCRAT,
I'LL VOTE FOR YOU.
IN THE MEANTIME, LET'S
ALL GET SOME SLEEP.
GOOD IDEA, I HAVE
TO GET UP EARLY.
I'M HAVING BREAKFAST WITH CLIFF.
WE HAVE A LOT WE
NEED TO DISCUSS.
MM.
GOOD NIGHT.
Natalie: OH, WAIT!
I'VE GOT A GREAT IDEA.
LET'S ALL MAKE A PACT
TO MEET RIGHT HERE
TO START OFF THE NEW
CENTURY AND COMPARE NOTES.
NO.
NO, I LIKE THE
IDEA. LET'S DO IT.
GOOD NIGHT.
Natalie: OH, WAIT!
LET'S ALL HOLD HANDS
AND MAKE A PLEDGE.
I HATE IT WHEN
YOU GET LIKE THIS.
COME ON.
WE ALL PROMISE TO MEET HERE,
JANUARY 1ST OF THE YEAR 2000,
TO START OFF THE NEW
CENTURY TOGETHER.
RIGHT. All: RIGHT!
AND LISTEN... NAT, THAT'S IT.
I WAS JUST GONNA ASK MRS.
GARRETT TO TURN OFF THE LIGHT.
GOOD NIGHT, GIRLS.
SEE YOU ALL IN THE YEAR 2000.
YEAH, YEAH.
Natalie: AND BLAIR, TRY
TO BE HERE ON TIME, OKAY?
I'D SAY AROUND
NOON WOULD BE GOOD.
GEE, I HOPE IT'S A NICE DAY.
I'D HATE TO START OFF THE
NEW CENTURY IN GALOSHES.
HELLO?
I'M ON TIME.
MRS. GARRETT, I'M
BACK FOR THE REUNION.
SHE STILL SELLS
CROISSANT AND QUICHE.
GOOD, NOTHING'S CHANGED.
RELEASE CROISSANT.
RELEASE CROISSANT.
SHOPLIFTERS WILL BE PROSECUTED.
SORRY.
BLAIR!
IT'S SO GOOD TO SEE YOU!
OH, HAPPY NEW CENTURY!
SAME TO YOU, MRS. GARRETT.
YOU LOOK MARVELOUS.
YOU... YOU HAVEN'T
CHANGED A BIT.
OH, LOOK, I WANT TO
APOLOGIZE FOR L.C.
L.C.?
YES, MY LASER COMPUTER.
SOMETIMES, IT GETS SO CRANKY.
HOW'S DALLAS?
DALLAS IS WONDERFUL.
I'M VERY, VERY HAPPY.
BUT LOOK AT YOUR SHOP!
WHAT'S HAPPENED
TO EDNA'S EDIBLES?
IT'S NOT EDNA'S EDIBLES ANYMORE.
IT'S EDNA'S EDIBLES AND
ADVICE INTERNATIONAL.
I SELL QUICHE AND SOLVE
PROBLEMS ALL OVER THE WORLD.
BUT I'VE KEPT MY
WORLD HEADQUARTERS
RIGHT HERE IN PEEKSKILL.
YOU'RE STILL SUCH A DYNAMO.
NO GRASS GROWS UNDER MY FEET.
BUT THEN, NO GRASS
GROWS ANYWHERE ANYMORE.
TWO LIFE FORMS
APPROACHING THE SIDEWALK.
NATALIE AND 2-T.
NO, THAT'S TOOTIE, NOT 2-T.
SHE THINKS EVERYONE'S A ROBOT.
HAPPY NEW CENTURY!
NATALIE! YOU LOOK FABULOUS.
THANK YOU.
MRS. GARRETT.
OH, MY TOOTIE.
BEAUTIFUL.
BLAIR!
YOU TWO LOOK MARVELOUS.
WE DO, DON'T WE?
WHERE'S JO?
UH, SHE'S COMING LATER.
WHAT'S JO DOING
THESE DAYS, ANYWAY?
WHAT'S JO DOING?
BLAIR, YOU KNOW.
NO, I DON'T, TELL ME.
OH, BLAIR, EVERYONE KNOWS
WHAT'S HAPPENED TO JO.
I DON'T.
WELL, YOU'RE GOING
TO BE SO SURPRISED.
I DON'T WANT TO BE SURPRISED.
TELL ME.
TELL ME! TELL ME
WHAT'S HAPPENED TO JO.
OH, TOOTIE. MRS. GARRETT.
YOU LOOK ABSOLUTELY EXQUISITE.
YOUR CAREER IS FABULOUS...
I CAN'T BELIEVE WE'RE
ALL TOGETHER AGAIN.
WELL, SOME OF US AREN'T.
I THINK I HAD ONE TOO
MANY MARTIAN WALLBANGERS
AT THE CAST PARTY LAST NIGHT.
HOW DID THE SHOW GO?
OH, THE AUDIENCE LOVED ME.
I DON'T CARE WHAT
THEY SAY ABOUT MARS.
THERE IS INTELLIGENT LIFE THERE.
I BET YOU WERE DOING
"OUR TOWN," WEREN'T YOU?
OH-HO, "OUR TOWN"?
GOODNESS, NO, DEARY.
I HAVEN'T DONE THAT
SINCE HIGH SCHOOL.
TRY THIS FOR YOUR
SPACE-LAG, TOOTIE,
SOME GOOD OLD-FASHIONED COCOA.
YOU'RE STILL A
LIFESAVER, MRS. GARRETT.
WELL, PAUL AND I HAD A
REASONABLY QUIET NEW YEAR'S EVE
ON OUR MOUNTAIN IN SANTA FE,
AS QUIET AS IT CAN GET
WHEN YOU HAVE SEVEN KIDS.
YOU'VE HAD SEVEN CHILDREN?
I HAVEN'T SHOWN YOU MY KIDS?
JUST PRESS THE BUTTON.
WELL, FIRST, WE HAD THE
TWINS, ERNEST AND JULIO.
THEN WE ADOPTED
MEI LING, DIMITRI,
FRANCESCA, AND YOSHIKO.
THEN, AFTER MY FIFTH BOOK
WAS PUBLISHED, WE CELEBRATED,
AND ALONG CAME PAUL, JR.
HOW DO YOU MANAGE TO WRITE
WITH SEVEN KIDS IN THE HOUSE?
OH, I JUST SAY WHAT MRS.
GARRETT USED TO SAY.
"QUIET!"
BLAIR, HOW MANY CHILDREN
DO YOU AND CLIFF HAVE NOW?
I HAVE A GIRL.
AND A BOY.
YES, I HAVE ONE OF EACH.
I HAVE EVERYTHING.
I'M VERY, VERY HAPPY.
WHOOPS, THERE
GOES MY ADVICE LINE.
EXCUSE ME, GIRLS,
SOMEONE'S IN TROUBLE IN, UH...
UGANDA.
EDNA'S EDIBLES AND ADVICE.
OH, NOW, PLEASE, I
CAN'T UNDERSTAND
A THING WHEN YOU'RE CRYING.
YES, AKUBA.
YOU SAY HE STOLE YOUR GOAT?
OH, MAYBE HE WAS JUST
TRYING TO GET YOUR ATTENTION.
OH, WELL, DID YOU TALK
OUT YOUR FEELINGS?
WAIT, I'M GONNA PUT YOU
ON HOLD FOR A SECOND.
OH, I THINK I'D BETTER
FINISH THE CALL IN THERE.
I NEED TO BE SITTING IN
MY TRANSLATOR MODULE.
WELL, WHERE WERE WE?
HAVING A WONDERFUL REUNION.
OH, BLAIR, I ALMOST FORGOT.
I BROUGHT YOU A COPY
OF MY LATEST BOOK.
A FLOPPY DISK?
YES, I'M OLD-FASHIONED.
I DON'T BELIEVE IN SWALLOWING
THOSE NEW BOOK CAPSULES.
I ALMOST CHOKED
ON "WAR AND PEACE."
"TO BLAIR, MY GIRLHOOD IDOL."
AW, NATALIE.
YOU'RE SUCH A MARVEL.
YEAH, WELL...
WELL, ENOUGH ABOUT US.
WHAT'S NEW WITH YOU, BLAIR?
WELL, CLIFF IS JUST THE
MOST WONDERFUL HUSBAND,
AS WELL AS A
WORLD-FAMOUS CHEST CUTTER.
OF COURSE, WHO HASN'T HEARD
OF THE WINFIELD
TITANIUM TURBO-HEART?
BUT WHAT'S NEW WITH YOU, BLAIR?
WELL, I'M VERY, VERY HAPPY.
WHAT'S THAT AWFUL NOISE?
SOME THINGS NEVER CHANGE.
YOU USED TO SAY THAT
ABOUT JO'S MOTORBIKE.
NOW, IT'S JO'S "ROCKET-COPTER!"
JO'S A ROCKET-COPTER PILOT.
WOULDN'T YOU KNOW IT?
HI, GUYS.
HI.
OH, I'M SORRY I'M LATE.
OH, MRS. G!
NOBODY HUGS LIKE MRS. G HUGS.
I BROUGHT YOU A PRESENT.
I'M SURE YOUR L.C. IS READY
FOR A LUBE JOB BY NOW.
THANKS.
IT DEMANDED ONE THIS MORNING.
BLAIR. JO!
BLAIR, YOU HAVEN'T
CHANGED A BIT.
HOW ARE YOU?
VERY, VERY HAPPY.
THAT'S GOOD.
YOU LOOK... SMASHING.
EXACTLY.
SINCE WHEN DO YOU
DRESS FOR SUCCESS?
SINCE I BECAME ONE.
AT WHAT?
STOP PRETENDING YOU DON'T KNOW.
I'M NOT PRETENDING.
PLEASE, SOMEONE TELL
ME WHAT'S HAPPENED TO JO.
GUESS WHO'S BEEN MADE
PRESIDENT OF WARNER INDUSTRIES?
NO BIG DEAL.
THAT'S MY FATHER'S COMPANY.
WHY DIDN'T HE ASK
ME TO BE PRESIDENT?
WELL, HE TRIED TO
REACH YOU, BLAIR,
BUT YOU WERE OUT
SHOPPING AT NEIMAN MARCUS...
FOR THREE MONTHS.
I REMEMBER.
SLIPCOVERS.
THE ACQUISITION PAPERS ARE
READY FOR YOUR SIGNATURE, J.P.
THANK YOU, PHILIP.
AND LET'S SET UP A
LITTLE LUNCH THING
AT THE 21 CLUB FOR THE
PRESS ANNOUNCEMENT.
RIGHT, J.P.
WE'RE ARRANGING A FEW TAKEOVERS.
WE'RE BUYING CALVIN KLEIN,
GLORIA VANDERBILT, AND KAWASAKI.
YOU'VE BEEN BUSY.
KEEPS ME OFF THE STREETS.
WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN UP TO?
WELL, I... I...
OH, SHE'S BEEN VERY, VERY HAPPY.
YES, I'M VERY, VERY HAPPY.
GIRLS, I WOULD LIKE TO
PROPOSE A COCOA TOAST.
THIS IS A VERY SPECIAL OCCASION.
PLANNED AND ARRANGED
BY NATALIE GREEN...
HYPHEN WEBSTER.
HERE'S TO US, TOGETHER AGAIN,
ABOUT TO CELEBRATE THE
TURN OF A NEW CENTURY!
WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.
I JUST HAD ANOTHER ONE
OF MY BRILLIANT IDEAS.
PERFECT!
THAT JUST ABOUT
COMPLETES THE OCCASION.
WHY DON'T ALL STAY WITH
MRS. GARRETT FOR A WHILE?
WE COULD SLEEP IN OUR
OLD BEDS IN OUR OLD ROOM,
AND WE CAN MAKE POPCORN,
AND STAY UP TALKING ALL NIGHT.
WOULDN'T THAT BE GREAT?
GREAT, BUT WHO HAS THE TIME?
I DO.
WELL, I'VE GOT A PERFORMANCE
TONIGHT AT THE WHITE HOUSE.
YOU'RE PERFORMING
FOR THE PRESIDENT?
YES, SHE LOVES MY WORK.
TOOTIE, TAKE ME WITH YOU.
LET ME BE YOUR SET DESIGNER.
BLAIR, DEAR, I DON'T KNOW.
REMEMBER THE PALM TREES
I MADE FOR "SOUTH PACIFIC"?
HOW COULD WE FORGET?
I STILL HAVE YOUR SKETCHBOOK.
OH, LOOKS LIKE YOU HAVEN'T
WORKED IN THIS FOR A LONG TIME.
SEE THE PALM TREES?
OH, AND JO,
REMEMBER WHEN I TRIED
TO REDESIGN THE
EASTLAND UNIFORMS?
MAYBE I COULD COME TO
WORK FOR WARNER INDUSTRIES.
OH, BLAIR, THIS SHOWS GREAT
PROMISE FOR A BEGINNER,
BUT WHAT HAVE YOU DONE LATELY?
IT'S TOO LATE.
BUT, JO... YOU KNOW,
YOU REALLY DID
HAVE TALENT BACK THEN, BLAIR,
BUT YOU NEVER DEVELOPED IT.
NOW, IT'S TOO LATE.
NATALIE, REMEMBER WHAT
A GREAT ILLUSTRATOR I WAS?
WE COULD BE A TEAM.
YOU WRITE, AND I DRAW.
HERE'S A SKETCH OF
YOU I DID IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I LIKE MY HAIR MUCH BETTER NOW.
SORRY, BLAIR, IT'S TOO LATE.
MRS. GARRETT, YOU
STILL BELIEVE IN ME.
LET ME WORK HERE,
I'LL DO ANYTHING.
OH, BLAIR, I'D LOVE TO HAVE
YOU BACK HERE WITH ME...
OH, THANK YOU, THANK YOU.
IF L.C. APPROVES OF
YOUR QUALIFICATIONS.
L.C.?
YES, MRS. G?
IS IT OKAY IF I HIRE BLAIR
TO HELP ME AROUND...
IT'S TOO LATE.
IT'S NOT TOO LATE!
All: IT'S TOO LATE.
I'VE GOT TALENT, I'LL
DO SOMETHING WITH IT.
IT'S NOT TOO LATE.
BLAIR, YOU'RE GONNA BE LATE.
IT'S NOT TOO LATE!
ALL RIGHT, FINE, KEEP SLEEPING.
YOU SAID LAST NIGHT YOU
WANTED TO GET UP EARLY.
THAT'S RIGHT.
IT'S 1984, ISN'T IT?
VERY GOOD.
NOW, YOU WANNA GUESS
WHAT PLANET WE'RE ON?
NO, I HAVE A MILLION
THINGS TO DO.
GOOD-BYE TO CLOCKS
TICKING, AND... AND...
I'M NEVER GONNA GET
THIS MONOLOGUE RIGHT.
TOOTIE, DON'T BE SO
HARD ON YOURSELF.
SOMEDAY, YOU'LL BE
PERFORMING AT THE WHITE HOUSE.
THANKS FOR THE VOTE
OF CONFIDENCE, BLAIR.
NATALIE, YOU'RE SUCH A MARVEL.
I WANT TO BE JUST LIKE YOU.
THAT'S NICE.
I'M JUST GONNA GO TAKE
MY TURN IN THE SHOWER NOW.
ALL RIGHT, I DID IT.
LIKE I ALWAYS SAY, THE EARLY
BIRD FIXES THE CARBURETOR.
GOOD FOR YOU, JO!
YOU WERE BORN TO
FIX CARBURETORS.
DON'T EVER FORGET THAT.
AND LISTEN...
STAY AWAY FROM MY
FATHER'S BUSINESS.
GOOD MORNING!
MRS. GARRETT, CAN
I USE YOUR SHOWER?
I HAVE A MILLION THINGS TO
DO, AND NATALIE'S USING OURS.
I WANT TO LOOK INTO
A SUMMER ART COURSE
AND CHECK OUT
SOME NEW ELECTIVES...
AND DON'T FORGET YOU'RE
MEETING CLIFF FOR BREAKFAST.
YEAH, WE HAVE A LOT TO DISCUSS.
YOU UNDERSTAND
THAT TURNING YOU DOWN
HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU.
YOU KISS ME LIKE THAT
AGAIN, AND I'LL BE CONVINCED.
IT'S JUST IN THE MIDDLE
OF THAT DREAM, I REALIZED...
I HAD NO IDEA WHO I
WAS OR WHAT I WANTED.
I CAN'T REALLY BE A GOOD WIFE
UNTIL I KNOW MORE ABOUT MYSELF.
WELL, I CAN'T ARGUE
WITH THAT, BUT...
IT'S SURE GONNA BE LONELY
IN DALLAS WITHOUT YOU.
IT'S GONNA BE LONELY
IN PEEKSKILL TOO.
BUT WE'LL WRITE TWICE A DAY,
AND WE'LL TALK
THREE TIMES A DAY.
AND DON'T WORRY ABOUT THE BILLS.
I OWN STOCK IN THE
PHONE COMPANY.
THEN WE'RE STILL GOING TOGETHER?
ABSOLUTELY.
WHAT DO YOU SAY WE GET SOME
BREAKFAST AT THE COPPER SKILLET?
GREAT, I'M STARVED.
AW, DARN, IT'S ALMOST 9:00.
AH, IT'S TOO LATE FOR
THE EARLY BIRD SPECIAL.
DON'T SAY THAT.
WHAT? IT'S NOT TOO LATE.
COME ON, WE'LL RUN.
♪ YOU'LL AVOID A LOT OF DAMAGE ♪
♪ AND ENJOY THE
FUN OF MANAGING ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THEY SHED A LOT OF LIGHT ♪
♪ IF YOU HEAR 'EM
FROM YOUR BROTHER ♪
♪ BETTER CLEAR 'EM
WITH YOUR MOTHER ♪
♪ BETTER GET 'EM RIGHT ♪
♪ CALL HER LATE AT NIGHT ♪
♪ YOU GOT THE FUTURE IN
THE PALM OF YOUR HAND ♪
♪ ALL YOU GOTTA DO TO GET
YOU THROUGH IS UNDERSTAND ♪
♪ YOU THINK YOU'D
RATHER DO WITHOUT ♪
♪ YOU'LL NEVER MAKE IT THROUGH ♪
♪ WITHOUT THE TRUTH ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE
ARE ALL ABOUT YOU ♪
♪ LEARNING THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪