The Facts of Life (1979–1988): Season 5, Episode 16 - All or Nothing - full transcript
♪ YOU TAKE THE GOOD,
YOU TAKE THE BAD ♪
♪ YOU TAKE 'EM BOTH
AND THERE YOU HAVE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THERE'S A TIME YOU
GOTTA GO AND SHOW ♪
♪ YOU'RE GROWIN'
NOW YOU KNOW ABOUT ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ WHEN THE WORLD NEVER SEEMS ♪
♪ TO BE LIVIN' UP
TO YOUR DREAMS ♪
♪ AND SUDDENLY
YOU'RE FINDIN' OUT ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF
LIFE ARE ALL ABOUT ♪
♪ YOU ♪
♪ YOU ♪
♪ IT TAKES A LOT
TO GET 'EM RIGHT ♪
♪ WHEN YOU'RE LEARNIN'
THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ LEARNIN' THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ LEARNIN' THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪♪
HEY, MRS. G. WHERE IS EVERYBODY?
I DON'T KNOW.
WELL, WHAT'S FOR DINNER?
I DON'T KNOW.
WELL, DIDN'T YOU
MAKE DINNER YET?
JO, CAN'T YOU SEE I'M BUSY?!
WELL, WHAT AM I GONNA EAT?
WELL, THERE'S SOME OLD
PASTA SALAD IN THE SHOP.
I WAS GONNA THROW IT
OUT, BUT YOU'LL LOVE IT.
JUST SCRAPE THE FUZZY
STUFF OFF THE TOP.
Jo: SHEESH, THE FUZZY STUFF.
All: SURPRISE!
OH, YOU GUYS. I SAID I
DIDN'T WANT ANY FUSS.
I KNOW, BUT WE FUSSED
ANYWAYS, SO THERE.
HEY, IT'S NOT EVERY DAY
THAT SOMEONE FROM THIS HOUSE
IS ELECTED TO THE
BOARD OF REGENTS
AT LANGLEY COLLEGE.
DOES THIS MEAN THERE
IS SOMETHING TO EAT?
WHAT DO YOU THINK I'VE BEEN
DOING, PLAYING SOLITAIRE?
I'VE MADE YOU YOUR
VERY FAVORITE...
BRATWURST WITH
LOTS OF EXTRA GARLIC.
SURE, WHAT DO YOU CARE?
YOU DON'T HAVE TO SLEEP
IN THE SAME ROOM WITH HER.
SPEECH!
GUYS, I DON'T KNOW
WHAT TO SAY HERE.
OH, I FIGURED THAT MIGHT HAPPEN,
SO I TOOK THE
LIBERTY OF COMPOSING
A FEW SHORT, BUT GRACIOUS WORDS.
PAY SPECIAL ATTENTION TO PAGE 2,
THE PART WHERE YOU COULDN'T
HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT ME.
NATALIE, THANKS, BUT I
THINK I CAN HANDLE THIS.
FINE. I'LL SEND IT
TO JESSE JACKSON.
UH, THANKS, EVERYBODY.
I JUST WANT TO SAY THAT
I WON'T LET YOU DOWN.
I'M GONNA WORK REAL HARD
FOR YOU AND FOR LANGLEY.
ALL RIGHT! WHOO!
WE KNOW THAT THE
SCHOOL IS IN TROUBLE.
THEY'RE RAISING THE
STUDENT ACTIVITY FEE,
AND SOME OF US
CAN'T AFFORD THAT.
THEY'RE ALSO CUTTING
BACK ON NEW SCHOLARSHIPS,
SO IT'S OBVIOUS THAT IT'S TIME
WE DID SOMETHING ABOUT IT.
YEAH! YEAH! YEAH!
I THINK THAT TOGETHER
WE CAN GET THIS SCHOOL
BACK ON TRACK, SO LET'S DO IT!
ALL RIGHT! WHOO! YEAH!
YOU KNOW, BACK WHEN I WAS...
I WAS FIRST THINKING OF RUNNING,
I THOUGHT TO MYSELF,
DO I REALLY WANT TO DO THIS?
I THOUGHT TO MYSELF,
AND I THOUGHT...
MRS. GARRETT, WE
NEED SOME MUSTARD.
I SAID YES BECAUSE I WANT...
Blair: DO WE HAVE DIET SODA?
SEE, I KNOW THAT I
CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE.
JO POLNIACZEK.
BOOTS ST. CLAIR, HOW NICE.
WELCOME TO OUR
ILLUSTRIOUS GROUP.
SINCE YOU'RE NEW HERE,
HOW ABOUT I DO THE INTROS, HUH?
OH, STEVE.
WHAT'S UP, BOOTS?
IS HE EVERYTHING I
TOLD YOU OR WHAT?
YOU HAVEN'T TOLD ME ANYTHING.
WHAT'S THERE TO TELL?
HE'S CAPTAIN OF
THE FOOTBALL TEAM,
BLOND HAIR, A WINNING SMILE.
HE'S A BUSINESS MAJOR
WHO ENJOYS SAILING
AND LONG WALKS...
I'M STEVE GARLAND.
YOU'RE JO POLNIACZEK?
WELCOME ABOARD THE BOARD.
CLEVER.
UH, LOOK, BEFORE
THE MEETING STARTS,
THERE ARE A COUPLE
THINGS I'D LIKE TO TALK ABOUT.
I MEAN, SINCE WE'RE
REPRESENTING THE STUDENTS HERE,
WE SHOULD KINDA STICK TOGETHER.
I WOULDN'T WORRY ABOUT IT, JO.
YOU SEE, CHAIRMAN BEAUMONT'S
JUST AS CONCERNED
ABOUT THINGS AS YOU ARE,
AND HE KNOWS WHAT
THE SCHOOL NEEDS.
I KNOW, BUT SHOULDN'T WE...
Beaumont: NOW, IF
EVERYBODY IS HERE,
WE'LL CALL THIS
MEETING TO ORDER.
FIRST, I'D LIKE TO INTRODUCE
OUR NEWLY ELECTED
STUDENT REGENT,
JO... POLNIKACK.
THANKS. IT'S GOOD TO BE HERE.
SHALL I READ THE MINUTES NOW?
UH, NOT TODAY, BOOTS.
WE HAVE TOO MUCH TO COVER.
OH.
WELL, THEN I'LL JUST ADD THEM ON
TO THE MINUTES OF THIS MEETING
AND READ THEM NEXT TIME, OK?
FINE.
UNLESS...
YOU KNOW WHAT I
COULD DO, MR. BEAUMONT?
I COULD SAVE THEM ALL UP
AND READ THEM ALL AT
THE END OF THE YEAR.
YOU DO THAT, BOOTS.
I WILL.
Beaumont: RIGHT.
NOW, LAST MEETING
WE HAD A MOTION
TO ELIMINATE THE
MICROBIOLOGY DEPARTMENT.
SHALL WE CALL THE VOTE?
ALL RIGHT, ALL THOSE IN FAVOR?
OPPOSED?
MOTION CARRIED.
THAT WAS QUICK.
BEAUMONT DOESN'T WASTE ANY TIME.
NOW THE NEXT
ORDER OF BUSINESS...
UH, YES, MISS POLNIKACK?
UH, I THINK WE SHOULD DISCUSS
THE STUDENT ACTIVITY FEE.
THERE'S BEEN A BIG INCREASE.
WELL, I'M SORRY. IT'S
NOT ON THE AGENDA,
SO IT'S NOT
SCHEDULED FOR DEBATE.
THAT'S HOW THE BOARD WORKS.
YEAH, BUT YOU SEE, I'VE
GOT A REAL PROBLEM HERE.
I MEAN, ANYBODY WHO
CAN'T PAY THAT EXTRA MONEY
CAN'T GET FOOTBALL TICKETS
OR GO TO ON-CAMPUS
FILMS AND CONCERTS.
YES, BUT WE NEED
TO RAISE THE FEE
TO MAINTAIN THE
STUDENT UNION BUILDING.
I KNOW, BUT I WAS READING
OVER THE BUDGET REPORT...
YOU ACTUALLY READ THE BUDGET?
AND IT SEEMS THAT
THERE IS A SURPLUS
IN THE BUILDINGS AND
GROUNDS ALLOCATION.
WE CAN'T PULL THE
MONEY FROM THERE.
WHY NOT?
WARD?
WELL, MAYBE WE CAN SQUEEZE
10,000 OUT OF
BUILDINGS AND GROUNDS
FOR A GOOD CAUSE.
CAN'T WE?
DONE.
NOW, BACK TO THE AGENDA...
ONE MORE THING.
WE'RE CUTTING WAY BACK
ON NEW SCHOLARSHIPS. HOW COME?
WELL, THIS SCHOOL HAS BEEN
VERY HARD-HIT BY INFLATION.
WE'VE HAD TO POSTPONE RAISES
FOR THE ADMINISTRATIVE
STAFF FOR 2 YEARS.
NOW WE'VE GOT TO GIVE IT TO 'EM,
AND THE MONEY HAS TO
COME FROM SOMEWHERE.
YEAH, BUT DOES IT HAVE TO COME
OUT OF THE SCHOLARSHIP FUND?
YOU READ THE BUDGET.
WE NEED 200,000 MORE.
YOU CAN'T PULL THAT FROM
BUILDINGS AND GROUNDS.
YEAH, BUT IT'S JUST THAT...
JO, I RESPECT YOUR
INTEREST IN THIS MATTER,
BUT WHEN MONEY GETS TIGHT,
I'M AFRAID IT'S ALWAYS
SCHOLARSHIPS THAT GET HIT.
I DON'T LIKE TO DO IT.
I KNOW, BUT... EXCUSE ME.
WARD, CAN WE MOVE ON?
I THINK WE SHOULD,
BECAUSE I HAVE SOME
GOOD NEWS. NOW...
THIS IS A DRAWING OF THE NEW
DUKE PATTERSON SCOREBOARD
FOR LANGLEY STADIUM!
LOOK AT THAT. THAT'S GREAT.
WHO'S DUKE PATTERSON?
LANGLEY'S RICHEST GRADUATE.
THIS BABY WILL BE
JUST LIKE THE KIND
THEY HAVE IN THE BIG 10.
WITH INSTANT REPLAYS?
IT'S GOT EVERYTHING.
IT EVEN GOES...
All: CHARGE!
EXCUSE ME.
HOW MUCH DOES THIS
DOO-DOO-LY-DOOT COST?
ABOUT 500,000.
All: OHH.
THE EXACT AMOUNT
OF DUKE'S PLEDGE
TO THE COLLEGE THIS YEAR.
OH, WHAT A GUY.
HEY! HOLD IT! HOLD IT!
THERE'S OUR ANSWER.
WE CAN USE THAT MONEY
FOR THE SCHOLARSHIP FUND.
OH, NO, NO, NO. FORGET IT.
DUKE WANTS A SCOREBOARD.
BUT WE DON'T NEED IT.
JO, WHEN SOMEBODY GIVES
YOU THAT MUCH MONEY,
YOU SPEND IT THE
WAY HE WANTS YOU TO.
BUT THE STUDENTS
AT LANGLEY DON'T CARE
ANYTHING ABOUT A NEW SCOREBOARD.
THE STUDENTS AT LANGLEY
DON'T RUN THE COLLEGE.
WELL, THEY'RE NOT
GONNA STAND FOR THIS.
I THINK THEY WILL.
ONCE THAT
SCOREBOARD'S ALL LIT UP,
THEY'LL LOVE IT.
BELIEVE ME.
NO, THEY WON'T. BELIEVE ME.
FINE.
BACK TO THE AGENDA.
ON THE TABLE IS A
MOTION TO RENEW
DEAN LEWIS' CONTRACT.
ALL IN FAVOR?
OPPOSED?
MOTION CARRIED. NOW
EVERYBODY TURN TO THE REPORT
ON THE ALUMNI BANQUET, PLEASE.
I HOPE WE'RE NOT
HAVING CHICKEN AND PEAS.
SO YOU WANT JO TO
SPEAK AT YOUR SORORITY?
OH, I THINK THURSDAY
AT 4:00 IS GOOD.
OR NOT. HOLD ON, PLEASE. WHAT?
ONE MINUTE, PLEASE.
I JUST PROMISED
HER TO ZETA BETA.
WHAT AM I GONNA
TELL GAMMA GAMMA?
HERE'S THE DATE BOOK.
YOU FIGURE IT OUT.
HELLO.
HELLO?
YEAH, DOES IT HAVE
TO BE ON A WEEKDAY?
WELL, HOW'S SATURDAY
AT 8:00 IN THE MORNING?
SURE. JO DOESN'T
NEED HER BEAUTY SLEEP.
GREAT. THANK YOU. BYE-BYE.
Natalie: GOOD-BYE.
NOW, WILL YOU PLEASE SIT
DOWN AND EAT YOUR DINNER?
I'M SORRY, MRS. GARRETT,
BUT JO APPOINTED US
HEADS OF HER
COMMUNICATIONS COMMITTEE.
YEAH, WELL, YOU JUST COMMUNICATE
WITH YOUR BROCCOLI
BEFORE IT GETS COLD.
SORRY WE'RE LATE, MRS. GARRETT,
BUT PEOPLE KEEP
STOPPING JO TO THANK HER
FOR HOLDING DOWN
THE STUDENT FEE.
OR ASKING HER WHAT
SHE'S GOING TO DO
ABOUT THE SCHOLARSHIP CUTS.
OH, JO, WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO
ABOUT THE SCHOLARSHIP CUTS?
SHE'S ALREADY DOING IT.
WE'VE BEEN OUT PASSING
HANDBILLS ALL OVER THE SCHOOL.
"SCHOLARSHIPS, YES.
SCOREBOARDS, NO."
AND SHE'S SPEAKING AT
GAMMA GAMMA ON THURSDAY.
AND ZETA BETA ON SATURDAY.
I AM?
NO, ACTUALLY IT'S ZETA
BETA ON THURSDAY,
AND GAMMA GAMMA ON SATURDAY.
WELL, THIS IS CRAZY.
WHY DON'T I JUST GET A BIG ROOM
IN THE STUDENT UNION TOMORROW
AND TALK TO EVERYBODY AT ONCE?
GOOD IDEA. I'LL GET
ON IT RIGHT AWAY.
HEY, THIS IS GOOD.
WELL, THANK YOU.
SIT DOWN. SIT DOWN.
FINALLY I HAVE
SOMEONE TO EAT WITH.
THEY DON'T HAVE A ROOM
AVAILABLE TOMORROW.
WELL, TRY LATER ON IN THE WEEK.
HOLD IT.
JO, YOU DON'T HAVE TO WAIT.
YOU ARE A REGENT.
YEAH, HELLO?
YEAH, UH, LOOK,
WE'VE GOT A BUNCH
OF CONCERNED STUDENTS
WHO REALLY NEED A ROOM TOMORROW.
YEAH, I KNOW YOU
HAVE NO ROOMS, BUT...
THIS IS, UH, JO
POLNIACZEK, THE REGENT.
YEAH, YEAH, THANKS.
YEAH, LISTEN, I NEED A
ROOM TOMORROW, A BIG ONE.
GREAT, GREAT, AND, UH, WOULD YOU
POST THE MEETING ON
THE EVENTS SCHEDULE?
FINE. BYE.
HEY, WHY DON'T WE
CONTACT THE LANGLIAN,
LET THEM KNOW ABOUT THE MEETING,
MAYBE THEY'LL DO A STORY.
NO, THEY'VE ALREADY
PUT THE PAPER TO BED.
IT'S TOO LATE.
NOT FOR A REGENT.
I'LL GET THEM FOR YOU.
GREAT. NOW BEAUMONT'S
REALLY GONNA HEAR
HOW THE STUDENTS FEEL
ABOUT THIS STUPID SCOREBOARD.
DO ALL THE REGENTS
THINK IT'S STUPID?
NO, BUT WHO CARES?
THEY'RE WRONG, AND I'M RIGHT.
HEY, WAIT A MINUTE.
WHAT KIND OF AN
ATTITUDE IS THAT?
YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO
WORK WITH THESE PEOPLE.
WELL, THEN THEY'RE JUST
GONNA HAVE TO START
SEEING THINGS MY WAY.
I'M TELLING YOU, BY
THE TIME I'M THROUGH,
THEY'RE GONNA WISH THEY
NEVER HEARD THE NAME...
POLNIKACK.
JO?
SO WHAT DO YOU THINK?
IT'S STILL A LITTLE
HEAVY, NATALIE.
HEY, THIS IS A HEAVY ISSUE.
HEY, YOU TWO AREN'T MARCHING
IN JO'S DEMONSTRATION
TOMORROW, ARE YOU?
I'LL NEED YOU IN THE SHOP.
WELL, WE WANT TO SEE
OUR SIGNS IN ACTION.
WELL, IF YOU WANT TO SEE
YOUR PAYCHECKS IN ACTION,
YOU'LL BE HERE, WORKING.
I'M TELLING YOU,
THEY'RE GONNA HEAR
FROM ME ABOUT THIS.
WHAT NOW?
THERE'S AN EDITORIAL
IN THE LANGLIAN
ABOUT OUR
ANTI-SCOREBOARD ACTIVITIES.
IT'S NOT KIND.
BEAUMONT PROBABLY
DICTATED IT WORD FOR WORD.
AT LEAST WE KNOW THE LANGLIAN
WON'T HAVE ITS
BUDGET CUT NEXT YEAR.
HEY, JO, WE FINISHED THE SIGNS.
OH, GREAT. LET'S SEE.
THAT DOESN'T SAY
"STOP THE SCOREBOARD."
I KNOW. I GAVE IT
A LITTLE PIZZAZZ.
I ASKED FOR "STOP
THE SCOREBOARD,"
AND THAT'S WHAT I WANT!
YOU CAN DO THAT LATER, GIRLS.
BETTER GET TO WORK IN THE SHOP.
OK.
THEY WORKED VERY
HARD ON THOSE SIGNS.
I KNOW, AND I'M SORRY,
BUT I DON'T HAVE TIME
TO PLAY AROUND HERE.
OR TIME TO SAY, "THANK YOU"?
JO, I WAS THINKING.
IF YOU'RE LOOKING FOR AN IMPACT,
YOU SHOULDN'T BE
STANDING AT THE FRONT
OF THE PICKET LINE TOMORROW.
SEEING YOU THERE THE WHOLE TIME
DILUTES THE EFFECT.
YOU'RE RIGHT.
WHAT I'LL DO... I'LL COME OUT
OF THE MIDDLE OF THE CROWD,
WALK UP THE STEPS, AND
THEN MAKE MY SPEECH.
I TOLD YOU. GIVE BLAIR
WARNER THE PETITION,
AND THE GUYS WILL
LINE UP TO SIGN IT.
I GOT OVER 500
SIGNATURES... AND 3 DATES.
FORGET IT, BLAIR. SIGNATURES
AREN'T GONNA DO ANYTHING.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
I GOT 23 PROFESSORS TO SIGN IT.
LOOK, I KNOW THE BOARD.
IF WE STICK TO WIMPY PETITIONS,
THEY'LL JUST WAIT ME OUT.
THEY'LL FIGURE I'LL GET
FED UP AND GO AWAY.
WE NEED SOMETHING
THAT IS GONNA SHOW THEM
I'M A FORCE ON THIS CAMPUS.
WELL, WE'RE MARCHING TOMORROW.
I KNOW, BUT WE CAN STILL
USE SOMETHING MORE.
JO, COULD YOU COME
OUT HERE A MINUTE?
THERE ARE SEVERAL
LARGE YOUNG MEN
OUT THERE ASKING FOR YOU.
WHO ARE THEY?
I DON'T KNOW, BUT I...
THINK THEY'RE GETTING LARGER.
WAIT A SECOND, NOW.
WE COME IN PEACE.
A COUPLE OF MY TEAMMATES
HERE JUST WANTED TO MEET YOU.
FACE TO FACE.
OH, WELL, THEN I'M
GONNA NEED A LADDER.
I'M RANDALL LIPPENCOTT.
WE CAME TO TALK TO YOU.
SO, TALK.
LOOK, DUKE PATTERSON'S
BEEN GIVING MONEY
TO LANGLEY EVERY YEAR.
A COUPLE OF YEARS
AGO IT WAS $50,000
TO REDO OUR LOCKER ROOMS.
LAST YEAR HE PAID
OUR WAY TO HAWAII
TO PLAY IN THE BOWL GAME.
OH, OH, I SEE.
WHEN YOU SAY HE
GIVES TO LANGLEY,
YOU MEAN HE GIVES
TO THE FOOTBALL TEAM.
NO, NO, THE BAND GOT
TO GO TO HAWAII, TOO.
WHAT HE'S TRYING TO SAY IS
IF WE TURN DOWN
DUKE'S GIFT THIS YEAR,
HE MIGHT NOT GIVE
ANYTHING NEXT YEAR.
WELL, WHAT'S LEFT TO
GIVE? PLATINUM GOALPOSTS?
LOOK, YOU CAN WORK
SOMETHING OUT WITH BEAUMONT.
I MEAN, I ASKED HIM IF HE'D
BE WILLING TO SPEAK WITH YOU,
AND HE SAID YES.
OH, WELL, WHAT A GENEROUS GUY.
YOU THINK HE'LL LET
ME SIT IN HIS CHAIR, TOO?
LOOK, IT COULDN'T
HURT YOU TO TALK TO HIM.
UNLESS HE'S WILLING TO
FORGET ABOUT THE SCOREBOARD,
WE'VE GOT NOTHING
TO SAY TO EACH OTHER.
NO, WAIT A MINUTE...
FORGET IT, MOOSE.
NOW, WE TRIED. LET'S GO.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
MOOSE, COME ON. LET'S GO.
HEY, TOOTIE, GET YOUR CAMERA.
GET ROGER, TOO. OK.
Moose: I... I WANT
TO SETTLE THIS.
MOOSE, HUH?
SO WHERE'S THE REST OF THE HERD?
JO, ARE YOU CRAZY?!
BLAIR, BUTT OUT. I
KNOW WHAT I'M DOING.
REALLY, COME ON BACK.
I'M ALWAYS ANXIOUS TO
TALK WITH MY CONSTITUENTS,
EVEN THOSE WITHOUT NECKS.
UM... CANNOLI? CANNOLI, ANYONE?
MOOSE, LET'S GO.
FORGET THE CANNOLI, MRS. G.
WHY DON'T YOU SEE IF WE
HAVE ANY RAW MEAT IN THE BACK?
WHO DO YOU THINK
YOU'RE TALKING TO?
GO ON. GET OUT.
NO, NOT UNTIL SHE
TAKES THAT BACK.
OH, AND WHAT IF I DON'T?
WHAT, ARE YOU GONNA
PUT YOUR PADS ON
AND BLOCK MY BRAINS OUT?!
YOU'RE LUCKY YOU'RE A GIRL.
SO ARE YOU.
TAKE A HIKE, PAL.
MOOSE, LET'S GO.
BACK OFF.
Natalie: MRS. GARRETT,
DO SOMETHING!
STOP IT! STOP IT IMMEDIATELY,
OR I'LL CALL THE POLICE!
NO, THAT'S A GOOD
IDEA, MRS. G. CALL THEM.
NOW, TOOTIE, TAKE THE PICTURE.
DID YOU HEAR WHAT HAPPENED?
SOMEBODY TRASHED THE
FOOTBALL LOCKER ROOMS.
NO KIDDING?
YOU DIDN'T TELL THEM
TO DO THAT, DID YOU?
NO, BLAIR, I DIDN'T.
JO, JO, THERE'S A GUY FROM
THE PEEKSKILL PRESS HERE.
OH, GOOD. MAKE
SURE HE STAYS HERE
THROUGH THE MEETING.
LOOK, JO,
WHAT HAPPENED IN THE
STORE WAS ONE THING,
BUT THERE'S BEEN
FISTFIGHTS ON CAMPUS,
PEOPLE ARE GETTING CRAZY.
WELL, WHAT DO YOU
WANT FROM ME, BLAIR?
I CAN'T CONTROL EVERY
STUDENT ON CAMPUS.
JO, IT'S JUST A SCOREBOARD.
NO, IT IS NOT JUST A SCOREBOARD.
IT HAS TO DO WITH THE
WAY THE SCHOOL RUNS...
JUST LISTEN TO WHAT...
BLAIR, LATER, ALL RIGHT?
GO GET HIM!
I WONDER IF I COULD
SAY A FEW WORDS?
COME ON, COME ON. SETTLE DOWN.
HEAR HIM OUT.
I'LL COME RIGHT TO THE POINT.
DUKE PATTERSON
WANTS HIS SCOREBOARD.
OK, BUT I'VE ASKED HIM IF WE
COULD BUY A CHEAPER SCOREBOARD...
ONE THAT WOULD COST
ABOUT $100,000 LESS.
DUKE SAID OK.
IT'S STILL A SCOREBOARD.
WE'LL GIVE YOU THE $100,000
FOR THE NEW SCHOLARSHIPS.
WAIT A MINUTE. WAIT A MINUTE.
WHAT IS THIS, A BRIBE?
NO.
LOOK, DO YOU WANT A SCOREBOARD?
Students: NO!
THERE'S YOUR ANSWER.
SEE YOU INSIDE.
WELL, WE'RE ONLY
HERE FOR ONE REASON,
SO, UH, LET'S GET GOING.
I'M SAVING THE MINUTES
LIKE I SAID I WOULD.
AS A MATTER OF FACT,
ONE OF MY SORORITY
SISTERS IS TYPING THEM UP.
WE'RE GOING TO BE PUTTING THEM
IN THESE DECORATIVE BINDERS.
WE DON'T CARE WHERE YOU
PUT YOUR MINUTES, BOOTS.
WE HAVE GOT OTHER PROBLEMS.
WE'VE BEEN GETTING
TELEGRAMS FROM THE ALUMNI
ABOUT THE RIOTS ON THE CAMPUS.
WE DON'T NEED ANGRY ALUMNI
AT ANNUAL GIVING TIME, WARD.
I KNOW. I KNOW.
LOOK WHAT YOU'VE STARTED.
PLEASE. PLEASE.
LOOK, MR. CHAIRMAN,
THE STUDENTS SIMPLY FEEL
THAT WHEN THE COLLEGE
IS STRUGGLING FINANCIALLY,
IT'S OBSCENE TO SPEND
HALF A MILLION DOLLARS
ON A SCOREBOARD WE DON'T NEED.
JO, WHAT IS IT YOU WANT?
I MOVE THAT THE BOARD OF REGENTS
REFUSE MR. PATTERSON'S OFFER
TO DONATE A NEW SCOREBOARD.
WILL THIS END THE RIOTS?
ALL RIGHT, LET'S DO IT.
WHAT? I'M SORRY,
WARD, BUT WE CAN'T RISK
LOSING MORE ALUMNI SUPPORT.
I'LL SECOND YOUR MOTION.
ALL IN FAVOR?
OPPOSED?
MOTION CARRIED,
MEETING ADJOURNED.
CONGRATULATIONS.
THANKS.
WELL, YOU WON.
I DIDN'T WIN, LANGLEY WON.
YOU THINK SO?
LOOK, I REALLY HOPE I DIDN'T
CAUSE YOU TOO MANY PROBLEMS.
ME? NO.
ALL I HAVE TO DO IS
TELL DUKE PATTERSON
THAT HE JUST SAVED
HALF A MILLION BUCKS.
BUT WHEN ALL THIS
RAH-RAH STUFF DIES DOWN,
YOU'RE GONNA HAVE A
LOT OF EXPLAINING TO DO
TO YOUR FANS OUT THERE.
SEE YOU AT THE
NEXT BOARD MEETING,
MS. POLNIACZEK.
YOU SAID WE COULD TALK LATER?
IS NOW LATER?
BLAIR, WE JUST WON. I GOTTA GO.
THEY'RE WAITING FOR ME.
OK, BUT BEFORE YOU LEAVE,
CAN I JUST ASK YOU ONE QUESTION?
ARE YOU CRAZY?
YOU JUST TURNED DOWN
$100,000 IN SCHOLARSHIPS.
I HAD TO, OR WE WOULD HAVE
BEEN STUCK WITH THE SCOREBOARD.
SO WHAT?
BLAIR, THAT'S NOT
WHAT THEY WANTED.
YOU HEARD THEM, THEY WERE THE ONES
SCREAMING "DUMP THE SCOREBOARD."
WHAT THEY WERE
SCREAMING WAS, "JO, JO, JO"
AND THAT'S ALL
YOU'VE BEEN HEARING.
OH, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.
I'M THEIR LEADER,
THEY VOTED FOR ME.
I VOTED FOR YOU, TOO.
YOU WERE COMMITTED,
YOU WERE DEDICATED.
YOU WANTED TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE.
I STILL DO.
NO. NOW ALL YOU WANT IS POWER.
IT'S NOT TRUE.
I GAVE THEM EXACTLY
WHAT THEY WANTED.
WHAT THEY WANTED
WAS SCHOLARSHIP MONEY,
AND THE JO I VOTED FOR
WOULD HAVE GOTTEN IT FOR THEM.
EVEN IF IT MEANT STARING
AT SOME STUPID SCOREBOARD.
Man: LET'S HEAR IT
FOR JO POLNIACZEK.
LISTEN TO 'EM.
WHAT AM I GONNA DO?
YOU STILL HAVE THE POWER, JO.
USE IT.
GET THAT SCHOLARSHIP MONEY BACK.
HOW? IT IS TOO LATE.
NO, IT'S NOT.
JUST GO OUT THERE AND
TELL 'EM YOU SCREWED UP.
YOU MEAN HUMILIATE MYSELF?
IT'S A START.
DOES IT GET EASIER
WITH PRACTICE?
WHY?
'CAUSE I FIGURE WHILE
I'M DOWN ON MY KNEES
I SHOULD PROBABLY CRAWL
OVER TO BEAUMONT'S OFFICE
AND ASK THE BOARD TO RECONSIDER.
Crowd, chanting: JO, JO, JO, JO!
JO, JO, JO, JO. JO, JO, JO, JO!
♪ YOU'LL AVOID A LOT OF DAMAGE ♪
♪ AND ENJOY THE FUN OF
MANAGING THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THEY SHED A LOT OF LIGHT ♪
♪ IF YOU HEAR IT
FROM YOUR BROTHER ♪
♪ BETTER CLEAR IT
WITH YOUR MOTHER ♪
♪ BETTER GET HIM RIGHT,
CALL HER LATE AT NIGHT ♪
♪ YOU'VE GOT THE FUTURE
IN THE PALM OF YOUR HAND ♪
♪ ALL YOU GOT TO DO TO GET
YOU THROUGH IS UNDERSTAND ♪
♪ YOU THINK YOU'D
RATHER DO WITHOUT ♪
♪ YOU'D NEVER MAKE IT
THROUGH WITHOUT THE TRUTH ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE
ARE ALL ABOUT YOU ♪
♪ LEARNING THE
FACTS OF LIFE... ♪♪
YOU TAKE THE BAD ♪
♪ YOU TAKE 'EM BOTH
AND THERE YOU HAVE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THERE'S A TIME YOU
GOTTA GO AND SHOW ♪
♪ YOU'RE GROWIN'
NOW YOU KNOW ABOUT ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ WHEN THE WORLD NEVER SEEMS ♪
♪ TO BE LIVIN' UP
TO YOUR DREAMS ♪
♪ AND SUDDENLY
YOU'RE FINDIN' OUT ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF
LIFE ARE ALL ABOUT ♪
♪ YOU ♪
♪ YOU ♪
♪ IT TAKES A LOT
TO GET 'EM RIGHT ♪
♪ WHEN YOU'RE LEARNIN'
THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ LEARNIN' THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ LEARNIN' THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪♪
HEY, MRS. G. WHERE IS EVERYBODY?
I DON'T KNOW.
WELL, WHAT'S FOR DINNER?
I DON'T KNOW.
WELL, DIDN'T YOU
MAKE DINNER YET?
JO, CAN'T YOU SEE I'M BUSY?!
WELL, WHAT AM I GONNA EAT?
WELL, THERE'S SOME OLD
PASTA SALAD IN THE SHOP.
I WAS GONNA THROW IT
OUT, BUT YOU'LL LOVE IT.
JUST SCRAPE THE FUZZY
STUFF OFF THE TOP.
Jo: SHEESH, THE FUZZY STUFF.
All: SURPRISE!
OH, YOU GUYS. I SAID I
DIDN'T WANT ANY FUSS.
I KNOW, BUT WE FUSSED
ANYWAYS, SO THERE.
HEY, IT'S NOT EVERY DAY
THAT SOMEONE FROM THIS HOUSE
IS ELECTED TO THE
BOARD OF REGENTS
AT LANGLEY COLLEGE.
DOES THIS MEAN THERE
IS SOMETHING TO EAT?
WHAT DO YOU THINK I'VE BEEN
DOING, PLAYING SOLITAIRE?
I'VE MADE YOU YOUR
VERY FAVORITE...
BRATWURST WITH
LOTS OF EXTRA GARLIC.
SURE, WHAT DO YOU CARE?
YOU DON'T HAVE TO SLEEP
IN THE SAME ROOM WITH HER.
SPEECH!
GUYS, I DON'T KNOW
WHAT TO SAY HERE.
OH, I FIGURED THAT MIGHT HAPPEN,
SO I TOOK THE
LIBERTY OF COMPOSING
A FEW SHORT, BUT GRACIOUS WORDS.
PAY SPECIAL ATTENTION TO PAGE 2,
THE PART WHERE YOU COULDN'T
HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT ME.
NATALIE, THANKS, BUT I
THINK I CAN HANDLE THIS.
FINE. I'LL SEND IT
TO JESSE JACKSON.
UH, THANKS, EVERYBODY.
I JUST WANT TO SAY THAT
I WON'T LET YOU DOWN.
I'M GONNA WORK REAL HARD
FOR YOU AND FOR LANGLEY.
ALL RIGHT! WHOO!
WE KNOW THAT THE
SCHOOL IS IN TROUBLE.
THEY'RE RAISING THE
STUDENT ACTIVITY FEE,
AND SOME OF US
CAN'T AFFORD THAT.
THEY'RE ALSO CUTTING
BACK ON NEW SCHOLARSHIPS,
SO IT'S OBVIOUS THAT IT'S TIME
WE DID SOMETHING ABOUT IT.
YEAH! YEAH! YEAH!
I THINK THAT TOGETHER
WE CAN GET THIS SCHOOL
BACK ON TRACK, SO LET'S DO IT!
ALL RIGHT! WHOO! YEAH!
YOU KNOW, BACK WHEN I WAS...
I WAS FIRST THINKING OF RUNNING,
I THOUGHT TO MYSELF,
DO I REALLY WANT TO DO THIS?
I THOUGHT TO MYSELF,
AND I THOUGHT...
MRS. GARRETT, WE
NEED SOME MUSTARD.
I SAID YES BECAUSE I WANT...
Blair: DO WE HAVE DIET SODA?
SEE, I KNOW THAT I
CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE.
JO POLNIACZEK.
BOOTS ST. CLAIR, HOW NICE.
WELCOME TO OUR
ILLUSTRIOUS GROUP.
SINCE YOU'RE NEW HERE,
HOW ABOUT I DO THE INTROS, HUH?
OH, STEVE.
WHAT'S UP, BOOTS?
IS HE EVERYTHING I
TOLD YOU OR WHAT?
YOU HAVEN'T TOLD ME ANYTHING.
WHAT'S THERE TO TELL?
HE'S CAPTAIN OF
THE FOOTBALL TEAM,
BLOND HAIR, A WINNING SMILE.
HE'S A BUSINESS MAJOR
WHO ENJOYS SAILING
AND LONG WALKS...
I'M STEVE GARLAND.
YOU'RE JO POLNIACZEK?
WELCOME ABOARD THE BOARD.
CLEVER.
UH, LOOK, BEFORE
THE MEETING STARTS,
THERE ARE A COUPLE
THINGS I'D LIKE TO TALK ABOUT.
I MEAN, SINCE WE'RE
REPRESENTING THE STUDENTS HERE,
WE SHOULD KINDA STICK TOGETHER.
I WOULDN'T WORRY ABOUT IT, JO.
YOU SEE, CHAIRMAN BEAUMONT'S
JUST AS CONCERNED
ABOUT THINGS AS YOU ARE,
AND HE KNOWS WHAT
THE SCHOOL NEEDS.
I KNOW, BUT SHOULDN'T WE...
Beaumont: NOW, IF
EVERYBODY IS HERE,
WE'LL CALL THIS
MEETING TO ORDER.
FIRST, I'D LIKE TO INTRODUCE
OUR NEWLY ELECTED
STUDENT REGENT,
JO... POLNIKACK.
THANKS. IT'S GOOD TO BE HERE.
SHALL I READ THE MINUTES NOW?
UH, NOT TODAY, BOOTS.
WE HAVE TOO MUCH TO COVER.
OH.
WELL, THEN I'LL JUST ADD THEM ON
TO THE MINUTES OF THIS MEETING
AND READ THEM NEXT TIME, OK?
FINE.
UNLESS...
YOU KNOW WHAT I
COULD DO, MR. BEAUMONT?
I COULD SAVE THEM ALL UP
AND READ THEM ALL AT
THE END OF THE YEAR.
YOU DO THAT, BOOTS.
I WILL.
Beaumont: RIGHT.
NOW, LAST MEETING
WE HAD A MOTION
TO ELIMINATE THE
MICROBIOLOGY DEPARTMENT.
SHALL WE CALL THE VOTE?
ALL RIGHT, ALL THOSE IN FAVOR?
OPPOSED?
MOTION CARRIED.
THAT WAS QUICK.
BEAUMONT DOESN'T WASTE ANY TIME.
NOW THE NEXT
ORDER OF BUSINESS...
UH, YES, MISS POLNIKACK?
UH, I THINK WE SHOULD DISCUSS
THE STUDENT ACTIVITY FEE.
THERE'S BEEN A BIG INCREASE.
WELL, I'M SORRY. IT'S
NOT ON THE AGENDA,
SO IT'S NOT
SCHEDULED FOR DEBATE.
THAT'S HOW THE BOARD WORKS.
YEAH, BUT YOU SEE, I'VE
GOT A REAL PROBLEM HERE.
I MEAN, ANYBODY WHO
CAN'T PAY THAT EXTRA MONEY
CAN'T GET FOOTBALL TICKETS
OR GO TO ON-CAMPUS
FILMS AND CONCERTS.
YES, BUT WE NEED
TO RAISE THE FEE
TO MAINTAIN THE
STUDENT UNION BUILDING.
I KNOW, BUT I WAS READING
OVER THE BUDGET REPORT...
YOU ACTUALLY READ THE BUDGET?
AND IT SEEMS THAT
THERE IS A SURPLUS
IN THE BUILDINGS AND
GROUNDS ALLOCATION.
WE CAN'T PULL THE
MONEY FROM THERE.
WHY NOT?
WARD?
WELL, MAYBE WE CAN SQUEEZE
10,000 OUT OF
BUILDINGS AND GROUNDS
FOR A GOOD CAUSE.
CAN'T WE?
DONE.
NOW, BACK TO THE AGENDA...
ONE MORE THING.
WE'RE CUTTING WAY BACK
ON NEW SCHOLARSHIPS. HOW COME?
WELL, THIS SCHOOL HAS BEEN
VERY HARD-HIT BY INFLATION.
WE'VE HAD TO POSTPONE RAISES
FOR THE ADMINISTRATIVE
STAFF FOR 2 YEARS.
NOW WE'VE GOT TO GIVE IT TO 'EM,
AND THE MONEY HAS TO
COME FROM SOMEWHERE.
YEAH, BUT DOES IT HAVE TO COME
OUT OF THE SCHOLARSHIP FUND?
YOU READ THE BUDGET.
WE NEED 200,000 MORE.
YOU CAN'T PULL THAT FROM
BUILDINGS AND GROUNDS.
YEAH, BUT IT'S JUST THAT...
JO, I RESPECT YOUR
INTEREST IN THIS MATTER,
BUT WHEN MONEY GETS TIGHT,
I'M AFRAID IT'S ALWAYS
SCHOLARSHIPS THAT GET HIT.
I DON'T LIKE TO DO IT.
I KNOW, BUT... EXCUSE ME.
WARD, CAN WE MOVE ON?
I THINK WE SHOULD,
BECAUSE I HAVE SOME
GOOD NEWS. NOW...
THIS IS A DRAWING OF THE NEW
DUKE PATTERSON SCOREBOARD
FOR LANGLEY STADIUM!
LOOK AT THAT. THAT'S GREAT.
WHO'S DUKE PATTERSON?
LANGLEY'S RICHEST GRADUATE.
THIS BABY WILL BE
JUST LIKE THE KIND
THEY HAVE IN THE BIG 10.
WITH INSTANT REPLAYS?
IT'S GOT EVERYTHING.
IT EVEN GOES...
All: CHARGE!
EXCUSE ME.
HOW MUCH DOES THIS
DOO-DOO-LY-DOOT COST?
ABOUT 500,000.
All: OHH.
THE EXACT AMOUNT
OF DUKE'S PLEDGE
TO THE COLLEGE THIS YEAR.
OH, WHAT A GUY.
HEY! HOLD IT! HOLD IT!
THERE'S OUR ANSWER.
WE CAN USE THAT MONEY
FOR THE SCHOLARSHIP FUND.
OH, NO, NO, NO. FORGET IT.
DUKE WANTS A SCOREBOARD.
BUT WE DON'T NEED IT.
JO, WHEN SOMEBODY GIVES
YOU THAT MUCH MONEY,
YOU SPEND IT THE
WAY HE WANTS YOU TO.
BUT THE STUDENTS
AT LANGLEY DON'T CARE
ANYTHING ABOUT A NEW SCOREBOARD.
THE STUDENTS AT LANGLEY
DON'T RUN THE COLLEGE.
WELL, THEY'RE NOT
GONNA STAND FOR THIS.
I THINK THEY WILL.
ONCE THAT
SCOREBOARD'S ALL LIT UP,
THEY'LL LOVE IT.
BELIEVE ME.
NO, THEY WON'T. BELIEVE ME.
FINE.
BACK TO THE AGENDA.
ON THE TABLE IS A
MOTION TO RENEW
DEAN LEWIS' CONTRACT.
ALL IN FAVOR?
OPPOSED?
MOTION CARRIED. NOW
EVERYBODY TURN TO THE REPORT
ON THE ALUMNI BANQUET, PLEASE.
I HOPE WE'RE NOT
HAVING CHICKEN AND PEAS.
SO YOU WANT JO TO
SPEAK AT YOUR SORORITY?
OH, I THINK THURSDAY
AT 4:00 IS GOOD.
OR NOT. HOLD ON, PLEASE. WHAT?
ONE MINUTE, PLEASE.
I JUST PROMISED
HER TO ZETA BETA.
WHAT AM I GONNA
TELL GAMMA GAMMA?
HERE'S THE DATE BOOK.
YOU FIGURE IT OUT.
HELLO.
HELLO?
YEAH, DOES IT HAVE
TO BE ON A WEEKDAY?
WELL, HOW'S SATURDAY
AT 8:00 IN THE MORNING?
SURE. JO DOESN'T
NEED HER BEAUTY SLEEP.
GREAT. THANK YOU. BYE-BYE.
Natalie: GOOD-BYE.
NOW, WILL YOU PLEASE SIT
DOWN AND EAT YOUR DINNER?
I'M SORRY, MRS. GARRETT,
BUT JO APPOINTED US
HEADS OF HER
COMMUNICATIONS COMMITTEE.
YEAH, WELL, YOU JUST COMMUNICATE
WITH YOUR BROCCOLI
BEFORE IT GETS COLD.
SORRY WE'RE LATE, MRS. GARRETT,
BUT PEOPLE KEEP
STOPPING JO TO THANK HER
FOR HOLDING DOWN
THE STUDENT FEE.
OR ASKING HER WHAT
SHE'S GOING TO DO
ABOUT THE SCHOLARSHIP CUTS.
OH, JO, WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO
ABOUT THE SCHOLARSHIP CUTS?
SHE'S ALREADY DOING IT.
WE'VE BEEN OUT PASSING
HANDBILLS ALL OVER THE SCHOOL.
"SCHOLARSHIPS, YES.
SCOREBOARDS, NO."
AND SHE'S SPEAKING AT
GAMMA GAMMA ON THURSDAY.
AND ZETA BETA ON SATURDAY.
I AM?
NO, ACTUALLY IT'S ZETA
BETA ON THURSDAY,
AND GAMMA GAMMA ON SATURDAY.
WELL, THIS IS CRAZY.
WHY DON'T I JUST GET A BIG ROOM
IN THE STUDENT UNION TOMORROW
AND TALK TO EVERYBODY AT ONCE?
GOOD IDEA. I'LL GET
ON IT RIGHT AWAY.
HEY, THIS IS GOOD.
WELL, THANK YOU.
SIT DOWN. SIT DOWN.
FINALLY I HAVE
SOMEONE TO EAT WITH.
THEY DON'T HAVE A ROOM
AVAILABLE TOMORROW.
WELL, TRY LATER ON IN THE WEEK.
HOLD IT.
JO, YOU DON'T HAVE TO WAIT.
YOU ARE A REGENT.
YEAH, HELLO?
YEAH, UH, LOOK,
WE'VE GOT A BUNCH
OF CONCERNED STUDENTS
WHO REALLY NEED A ROOM TOMORROW.
YEAH, I KNOW YOU
HAVE NO ROOMS, BUT...
THIS IS, UH, JO
POLNIACZEK, THE REGENT.
YEAH, YEAH, THANKS.
YEAH, LISTEN, I NEED A
ROOM TOMORROW, A BIG ONE.
GREAT, GREAT, AND, UH, WOULD YOU
POST THE MEETING ON
THE EVENTS SCHEDULE?
FINE. BYE.
HEY, WHY DON'T WE
CONTACT THE LANGLIAN,
LET THEM KNOW ABOUT THE MEETING,
MAYBE THEY'LL DO A STORY.
NO, THEY'VE ALREADY
PUT THE PAPER TO BED.
IT'S TOO LATE.
NOT FOR A REGENT.
I'LL GET THEM FOR YOU.
GREAT. NOW BEAUMONT'S
REALLY GONNA HEAR
HOW THE STUDENTS FEEL
ABOUT THIS STUPID SCOREBOARD.
DO ALL THE REGENTS
THINK IT'S STUPID?
NO, BUT WHO CARES?
THEY'RE WRONG, AND I'M RIGHT.
HEY, WAIT A MINUTE.
WHAT KIND OF AN
ATTITUDE IS THAT?
YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO
WORK WITH THESE PEOPLE.
WELL, THEN THEY'RE JUST
GONNA HAVE TO START
SEEING THINGS MY WAY.
I'M TELLING YOU, BY
THE TIME I'M THROUGH,
THEY'RE GONNA WISH THEY
NEVER HEARD THE NAME...
POLNIKACK.
JO?
SO WHAT DO YOU THINK?
IT'S STILL A LITTLE
HEAVY, NATALIE.
HEY, THIS IS A HEAVY ISSUE.
HEY, YOU TWO AREN'T MARCHING
IN JO'S DEMONSTRATION
TOMORROW, ARE YOU?
I'LL NEED YOU IN THE SHOP.
WELL, WE WANT TO SEE
OUR SIGNS IN ACTION.
WELL, IF YOU WANT TO SEE
YOUR PAYCHECKS IN ACTION,
YOU'LL BE HERE, WORKING.
I'M TELLING YOU,
THEY'RE GONNA HEAR
FROM ME ABOUT THIS.
WHAT NOW?
THERE'S AN EDITORIAL
IN THE LANGLIAN
ABOUT OUR
ANTI-SCOREBOARD ACTIVITIES.
IT'S NOT KIND.
BEAUMONT PROBABLY
DICTATED IT WORD FOR WORD.
AT LEAST WE KNOW THE LANGLIAN
WON'T HAVE ITS
BUDGET CUT NEXT YEAR.
HEY, JO, WE FINISHED THE SIGNS.
OH, GREAT. LET'S SEE.
THAT DOESN'T SAY
"STOP THE SCOREBOARD."
I KNOW. I GAVE IT
A LITTLE PIZZAZZ.
I ASKED FOR "STOP
THE SCOREBOARD,"
AND THAT'S WHAT I WANT!
YOU CAN DO THAT LATER, GIRLS.
BETTER GET TO WORK IN THE SHOP.
OK.
THEY WORKED VERY
HARD ON THOSE SIGNS.
I KNOW, AND I'M SORRY,
BUT I DON'T HAVE TIME
TO PLAY AROUND HERE.
OR TIME TO SAY, "THANK YOU"?
JO, I WAS THINKING.
IF YOU'RE LOOKING FOR AN IMPACT,
YOU SHOULDN'T BE
STANDING AT THE FRONT
OF THE PICKET LINE TOMORROW.
SEEING YOU THERE THE WHOLE TIME
DILUTES THE EFFECT.
YOU'RE RIGHT.
WHAT I'LL DO... I'LL COME OUT
OF THE MIDDLE OF THE CROWD,
WALK UP THE STEPS, AND
THEN MAKE MY SPEECH.
I TOLD YOU. GIVE BLAIR
WARNER THE PETITION,
AND THE GUYS WILL
LINE UP TO SIGN IT.
I GOT OVER 500
SIGNATURES... AND 3 DATES.
FORGET IT, BLAIR. SIGNATURES
AREN'T GONNA DO ANYTHING.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
I GOT 23 PROFESSORS TO SIGN IT.
LOOK, I KNOW THE BOARD.
IF WE STICK TO WIMPY PETITIONS,
THEY'LL JUST WAIT ME OUT.
THEY'LL FIGURE I'LL GET
FED UP AND GO AWAY.
WE NEED SOMETHING
THAT IS GONNA SHOW THEM
I'M A FORCE ON THIS CAMPUS.
WELL, WE'RE MARCHING TOMORROW.
I KNOW, BUT WE CAN STILL
USE SOMETHING MORE.
JO, COULD YOU COME
OUT HERE A MINUTE?
THERE ARE SEVERAL
LARGE YOUNG MEN
OUT THERE ASKING FOR YOU.
WHO ARE THEY?
I DON'T KNOW, BUT I...
THINK THEY'RE GETTING LARGER.
WAIT A SECOND, NOW.
WE COME IN PEACE.
A COUPLE OF MY TEAMMATES
HERE JUST WANTED TO MEET YOU.
FACE TO FACE.
OH, WELL, THEN I'M
GONNA NEED A LADDER.
I'M RANDALL LIPPENCOTT.
WE CAME TO TALK TO YOU.
SO, TALK.
LOOK, DUKE PATTERSON'S
BEEN GIVING MONEY
TO LANGLEY EVERY YEAR.
A COUPLE OF YEARS
AGO IT WAS $50,000
TO REDO OUR LOCKER ROOMS.
LAST YEAR HE PAID
OUR WAY TO HAWAII
TO PLAY IN THE BOWL GAME.
OH, OH, I SEE.
WHEN YOU SAY HE
GIVES TO LANGLEY,
YOU MEAN HE GIVES
TO THE FOOTBALL TEAM.
NO, NO, THE BAND GOT
TO GO TO HAWAII, TOO.
WHAT HE'S TRYING TO SAY IS
IF WE TURN DOWN
DUKE'S GIFT THIS YEAR,
HE MIGHT NOT GIVE
ANYTHING NEXT YEAR.
WELL, WHAT'S LEFT TO
GIVE? PLATINUM GOALPOSTS?
LOOK, YOU CAN WORK
SOMETHING OUT WITH BEAUMONT.
I MEAN, I ASKED HIM IF HE'D
BE WILLING TO SPEAK WITH YOU,
AND HE SAID YES.
OH, WELL, WHAT A GENEROUS GUY.
YOU THINK HE'LL LET
ME SIT IN HIS CHAIR, TOO?
LOOK, IT COULDN'T
HURT YOU TO TALK TO HIM.
UNLESS HE'S WILLING TO
FORGET ABOUT THE SCOREBOARD,
WE'VE GOT NOTHING
TO SAY TO EACH OTHER.
NO, WAIT A MINUTE...
FORGET IT, MOOSE.
NOW, WE TRIED. LET'S GO.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
MOOSE, COME ON. LET'S GO.
HEY, TOOTIE, GET YOUR CAMERA.
GET ROGER, TOO. OK.
Moose: I... I WANT
TO SETTLE THIS.
MOOSE, HUH?
SO WHERE'S THE REST OF THE HERD?
JO, ARE YOU CRAZY?!
BLAIR, BUTT OUT. I
KNOW WHAT I'M DOING.
REALLY, COME ON BACK.
I'M ALWAYS ANXIOUS TO
TALK WITH MY CONSTITUENTS,
EVEN THOSE WITHOUT NECKS.
UM... CANNOLI? CANNOLI, ANYONE?
MOOSE, LET'S GO.
FORGET THE CANNOLI, MRS. G.
WHY DON'T YOU SEE IF WE
HAVE ANY RAW MEAT IN THE BACK?
WHO DO YOU THINK
YOU'RE TALKING TO?
GO ON. GET OUT.
NO, NOT UNTIL SHE
TAKES THAT BACK.
OH, AND WHAT IF I DON'T?
WHAT, ARE YOU GONNA
PUT YOUR PADS ON
AND BLOCK MY BRAINS OUT?!
YOU'RE LUCKY YOU'RE A GIRL.
SO ARE YOU.
TAKE A HIKE, PAL.
MOOSE, LET'S GO.
BACK OFF.
Natalie: MRS. GARRETT,
DO SOMETHING!
STOP IT! STOP IT IMMEDIATELY,
OR I'LL CALL THE POLICE!
NO, THAT'S A GOOD
IDEA, MRS. G. CALL THEM.
NOW, TOOTIE, TAKE THE PICTURE.
DID YOU HEAR WHAT HAPPENED?
SOMEBODY TRASHED THE
FOOTBALL LOCKER ROOMS.
NO KIDDING?
YOU DIDN'T TELL THEM
TO DO THAT, DID YOU?
NO, BLAIR, I DIDN'T.
JO, JO, THERE'S A GUY FROM
THE PEEKSKILL PRESS HERE.
OH, GOOD. MAKE
SURE HE STAYS HERE
THROUGH THE MEETING.
LOOK, JO,
WHAT HAPPENED IN THE
STORE WAS ONE THING,
BUT THERE'S BEEN
FISTFIGHTS ON CAMPUS,
PEOPLE ARE GETTING CRAZY.
WELL, WHAT DO YOU
WANT FROM ME, BLAIR?
I CAN'T CONTROL EVERY
STUDENT ON CAMPUS.
JO, IT'S JUST A SCOREBOARD.
NO, IT IS NOT JUST A SCOREBOARD.
IT HAS TO DO WITH THE
WAY THE SCHOOL RUNS...
JUST LISTEN TO WHAT...
BLAIR, LATER, ALL RIGHT?
GO GET HIM!
I WONDER IF I COULD
SAY A FEW WORDS?
COME ON, COME ON. SETTLE DOWN.
HEAR HIM OUT.
I'LL COME RIGHT TO THE POINT.
DUKE PATTERSON
WANTS HIS SCOREBOARD.
OK, BUT I'VE ASKED HIM IF WE
COULD BUY A CHEAPER SCOREBOARD...
ONE THAT WOULD COST
ABOUT $100,000 LESS.
DUKE SAID OK.
IT'S STILL A SCOREBOARD.
WE'LL GIVE YOU THE $100,000
FOR THE NEW SCHOLARSHIPS.
WAIT A MINUTE. WAIT A MINUTE.
WHAT IS THIS, A BRIBE?
NO.
LOOK, DO YOU WANT A SCOREBOARD?
Students: NO!
THERE'S YOUR ANSWER.
SEE YOU INSIDE.
WELL, WE'RE ONLY
HERE FOR ONE REASON,
SO, UH, LET'S GET GOING.
I'M SAVING THE MINUTES
LIKE I SAID I WOULD.
AS A MATTER OF FACT,
ONE OF MY SORORITY
SISTERS IS TYPING THEM UP.
WE'RE GOING TO BE PUTTING THEM
IN THESE DECORATIVE BINDERS.
WE DON'T CARE WHERE YOU
PUT YOUR MINUTES, BOOTS.
WE HAVE GOT OTHER PROBLEMS.
WE'VE BEEN GETTING
TELEGRAMS FROM THE ALUMNI
ABOUT THE RIOTS ON THE CAMPUS.
WE DON'T NEED ANGRY ALUMNI
AT ANNUAL GIVING TIME, WARD.
I KNOW. I KNOW.
LOOK WHAT YOU'VE STARTED.
PLEASE. PLEASE.
LOOK, MR. CHAIRMAN,
THE STUDENTS SIMPLY FEEL
THAT WHEN THE COLLEGE
IS STRUGGLING FINANCIALLY,
IT'S OBSCENE TO SPEND
HALF A MILLION DOLLARS
ON A SCOREBOARD WE DON'T NEED.
JO, WHAT IS IT YOU WANT?
I MOVE THAT THE BOARD OF REGENTS
REFUSE MR. PATTERSON'S OFFER
TO DONATE A NEW SCOREBOARD.
WILL THIS END THE RIOTS?
ALL RIGHT, LET'S DO IT.
WHAT? I'M SORRY,
WARD, BUT WE CAN'T RISK
LOSING MORE ALUMNI SUPPORT.
I'LL SECOND YOUR MOTION.
ALL IN FAVOR?
OPPOSED?
MOTION CARRIED,
MEETING ADJOURNED.
CONGRATULATIONS.
THANKS.
WELL, YOU WON.
I DIDN'T WIN, LANGLEY WON.
YOU THINK SO?
LOOK, I REALLY HOPE I DIDN'T
CAUSE YOU TOO MANY PROBLEMS.
ME? NO.
ALL I HAVE TO DO IS
TELL DUKE PATTERSON
THAT HE JUST SAVED
HALF A MILLION BUCKS.
BUT WHEN ALL THIS
RAH-RAH STUFF DIES DOWN,
YOU'RE GONNA HAVE A
LOT OF EXPLAINING TO DO
TO YOUR FANS OUT THERE.
SEE YOU AT THE
NEXT BOARD MEETING,
MS. POLNIACZEK.
YOU SAID WE COULD TALK LATER?
IS NOW LATER?
BLAIR, WE JUST WON. I GOTTA GO.
THEY'RE WAITING FOR ME.
OK, BUT BEFORE YOU LEAVE,
CAN I JUST ASK YOU ONE QUESTION?
ARE YOU CRAZY?
YOU JUST TURNED DOWN
$100,000 IN SCHOLARSHIPS.
I HAD TO, OR WE WOULD HAVE
BEEN STUCK WITH THE SCOREBOARD.
SO WHAT?
BLAIR, THAT'S NOT
WHAT THEY WANTED.
YOU HEARD THEM, THEY WERE THE ONES
SCREAMING "DUMP THE SCOREBOARD."
WHAT THEY WERE
SCREAMING WAS, "JO, JO, JO"
AND THAT'S ALL
YOU'VE BEEN HEARING.
OH, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.
I'M THEIR LEADER,
THEY VOTED FOR ME.
I VOTED FOR YOU, TOO.
YOU WERE COMMITTED,
YOU WERE DEDICATED.
YOU WANTED TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE.
I STILL DO.
NO. NOW ALL YOU WANT IS POWER.
IT'S NOT TRUE.
I GAVE THEM EXACTLY
WHAT THEY WANTED.
WHAT THEY WANTED
WAS SCHOLARSHIP MONEY,
AND THE JO I VOTED FOR
WOULD HAVE GOTTEN IT FOR THEM.
EVEN IF IT MEANT STARING
AT SOME STUPID SCOREBOARD.
Man: LET'S HEAR IT
FOR JO POLNIACZEK.
LISTEN TO 'EM.
WHAT AM I GONNA DO?
YOU STILL HAVE THE POWER, JO.
USE IT.
GET THAT SCHOLARSHIP MONEY BACK.
HOW? IT IS TOO LATE.
NO, IT'S NOT.
JUST GO OUT THERE AND
TELL 'EM YOU SCREWED UP.
YOU MEAN HUMILIATE MYSELF?
IT'S A START.
DOES IT GET EASIER
WITH PRACTICE?
WHY?
'CAUSE I FIGURE WHILE
I'M DOWN ON MY KNEES
I SHOULD PROBABLY CRAWL
OVER TO BEAUMONT'S OFFICE
AND ASK THE BOARD TO RECONSIDER.
Crowd, chanting: JO, JO, JO, JO!
JO, JO, JO, JO. JO, JO, JO, JO!
♪ YOU'LL AVOID A LOT OF DAMAGE ♪
♪ AND ENJOY THE FUN OF
MANAGING THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THEY SHED A LOT OF LIGHT ♪
♪ IF YOU HEAR IT
FROM YOUR BROTHER ♪
♪ BETTER CLEAR IT
WITH YOUR MOTHER ♪
♪ BETTER GET HIM RIGHT,
CALL HER LATE AT NIGHT ♪
♪ YOU'VE GOT THE FUTURE
IN THE PALM OF YOUR HAND ♪
♪ ALL YOU GOT TO DO TO GET
YOU THROUGH IS UNDERSTAND ♪
♪ YOU THINK YOU'D
RATHER DO WITHOUT ♪
♪ YOU'D NEVER MAKE IT
THROUGH WITHOUT THE TRUTH ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE
ARE ALL ABOUT YOU ♪
♪ LEARNING THE
FACTS OF LIFE... ♪♪