The Emperor's New School (2006–2008): Season 2, Episode 14 - Air Kuzco/Kronkenitza - full transcript

KUZCO HERE TO LET YOU KNOW
THERE'S A WHOLE NEW
REASON TO LOVE ME--

I'M NOW A GIFTED ATHLETE
AND SPORTS HERO.

OW. THEME MUSIC...

♪ HE'S ON HIS WAY
TO THE THRONE ♪

♪ HE'S ON HIS WAY TO SUCCESS ♪

♪ BUT HE HAS TO GO TO SCHOOL ♪

♪ HE'S GOT TO ACE THAT TEST ♪

♪ HE'S AN EMPEROR-TO-BE ♪

♪ AND HE'S TOTALLY-- ♪

YOU KNOW,
IT'S ALL ABOUT ME.

♪ EXACTLY ♪



♪ LET'S GO ♪

♪ HE'S GOIN'
TO KUZCO ACADEMY ♪

♪ KUZCO ACADEMY ♪

♪ HE'S GOT TO LEARN
HIS ABCs ♪

♪ DON'T TRY TO STOP HIM,
TO TOP HIM ♪

TO DESTROY HIM,
RIGHT?
UH...

♪ K-U-Z-C-O ♪

♪ KUZCO, KUZCO, GO, GO ♪

♪ HE'S GOT THE COOL ♪

♪ HE'S GOT THE CHARM
AND THE LOOKS ♪

♪ AND A HOTTIE
THAN CAN HELP HIM ♪

♪ READ THAT THING CALLED BOOK ♪

♪ LET'S GO ♪

♪ HE'S GOIN'
TO KUZCO ACADEMY ♪



♪ COME ON, KUZCO ♪

♪ HE'S GOT TO FULFILL
HIS DESTINY ♪

♪ HIS FRIENDS ARE LOYAL ♪

♪ IT'S ROYAL, THEY'LL HELP
AGAINST THE FOIL-- ♪

FRIENDS? I THOUGHT
THIS WAS ALL ABOUT ME.

HEH HEH.
SPELL MY NAME AGAIN.

♪ K-U-Z-C-O ♪

♪ KUZCO, KUZCO,
GO, GO ♪

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
DISNEY-ABC CABLE NETWORKS GROUP

Kuzco:
ALL RIGHT, LET'S KEEP

THIS BOOK SIGNING
ORGANIZED, GUACA.

IT'S UP TO YOU TO KEEP
MY ADORING MOB AT BAY.

YES, SIR!

COME GET
THE FIRST EDITION
OF MY MEMOIRS--

EMPEROR KUZCO:
GREAT EXPECTATIONS
EXCEEDED.

THE GUY I FORCED TO WRITE IT
SAYS IT RULES.

IT RULES.

ALL RIGHTY--
MY FIRST CUSTOMERS.

DON'T PUSH, LADIES.
YOU'LL ALL GET COPIES.

[GASPS]

LIKE, WOW!
YOU'RE THE GREATEST!

HEH.
MARRY ME.

HEY, WHAT'S WITH
KRONK GETTING ALL THE ATTENTION?

HE'S A SPORT
SUPERSTAR, SIR.
WHAT?

BUT I'M THE REAL
SPORT SUPERSTAR.

BACK WHEN I WAS EMPEROR,
I WAS THE UNDISPUTED
EMPEROR-BALL CHAMP.

IF KUZCO MAKES THIS SHOT,
HE WINS ANOTHER
EMPEROR-BALL CHAMPIONSHIP.

HE LINES UP,
PREPARES TO SHOOT...

AND IT'S GOOD!

[CHANTING]
KUZCO, KUZCO, KUZCO,

KUZCO, KUZCO...
SIR?

SIR!
HUH?

YOU'VE BEEN CHANTING
YOUR OWN NAME FOR
THE LAST 2 HOURS.

REALLY? COOL.
ANYWAY, FORGET THESE BOOKS.

I'M JOINING
THE EMPEROR-BALL TEAM.

THE SCHOOL DOESN'T HAVE
AN EMPEROR-BALL TEAM,
AS IT HAS NO EMPERORS!

THEN I'M JOINING
THE INCA-BALL TEAM.

Flaco Moleguaco: WELCOME TO
INCA-BALL TRYOUTS.

THIS YEAR,
WITH OUR M.V.P. KRONK,

WE'VE GOT A REAL CHANCE
TO BEAT EMPIRE HIGH

AND THEIR STAR PLAYER
TOPANANZBI.

NOT THAT I REALLY CARE.
I GET PAID EITHER WAY.

NOW, I'LL BE OVER ON
THE BLEACHERS TAKING A NAP.

DO SOME DRILLS OR WHATEVER.

YOU HEARD THE COACH.
LET'S DO THIS!

SHH! INSIDE VOICES.

HMM, NOT BAD. BUT CHECK OUT
THESE MAD SKILLS.

[CRASH]
[CAT SCREECHES]

HUH...A LITTLE OFF.

I BETTER
SHOOT THROUGH IT.

[CLANG]

[CLICK]
[BELLS RINGING]

AFTER WATCHING YOU
FOR SEVERAL MINUTES

AND SLEEPING ON IT
FOR SEVERAL HOURS,

I'M READY TO NAME
OUR STARTING FIVE--

KRONK, OF COURSE, KAVO,

YOU, TWO, AND...

THAT CHAIR.

HEY! HE DOESN'T EVEN GO
TO THIS SCHOOL.

OHH, FINE. THEN SINCE
NOBODY ELSE TRIED OUT,

IT LOOKS LIKE WE HAVE NO CHOICE
BUT TO AWARD THE LAST SPOT TO...

KUZCO.

YES! DIBS ON PLAYMAKER.

THAT'S NOT EVEN
A REAL POSITION.

YEAH, YEAH. DON'T HATE
THE PLAYMAKER. HATE THE GAME.

I DO HATE THIS GAME.

SORRY I'M LATE. AFTER PRACTICE,
EVERYONE WANTED AUTOGRAPHS--

TOUGH LIFE
AS A SPORT SUPERSTAR.

WELL, YOU ALMOST MISSED
TESTING MY LATEST
BRILLIANT CREATION.

[BEEPING]

WHOA! YOU'VE FINALLY
COME UP WITH AN EASY WAY
TO DESTROY KUZCO.

WHO SAID ANYTHING ABOUT KUZCO?
I HAVE OTHER INTERESTS,
YOU KNOW.

THESE ARE DELICIOUS
CEREAL FLAKES.

NOW, WE THROW
YOUR FACE ON A BOX

AND USE YOUR SPORT CELEBRITY
TO SELL THEM

AS PART OF
A DELICIOUS BREAKFAST.

SOON, I'LL HAVE ENOUGH MONEY
TO START AN EMPIRE OF MY OWN--

A CEREAL EMPIRE!

CEREAL? WITH PRIZES?

LIKE MINI SUBMARINES?
OR KAZOOS?

OR LITTLE BOXES OF CEREAL?

OHH. FINE.
WE CAN HAVE PRIZES.

YAY, PRIZES!
YES, YES, YES, YES, YES!

[CROWD CHEERING]

Guaca: WELCOME TO THE FIRST GAME
OF THE INCA-BALL SEASON,

WHERE KUZCO
AND SOME OTHER GUYS

ARE SET TO SQUARE OFF AGAINST
THE SANTIAGO HIGH SALAMANDERS.

[BLOWS WHISTLE]

[CROWD CHEERING]

GO, KRONK!
GO, KRONK!

WHAT ARE Y'ALL
CHEERING FOR?
I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING.

GIVE ME THE BALL!
GIVE ME THE BALL!

WE DON'T HAVE THE BALL.
NOW, COME PLAY DEFENSE.

UH, HELLO.
I CAN'T SCORE
ON DEFENSE.

YAY! I GET THE BALL!

BUT, UH,
WE'RE ON THE SAME TEAM.

[SNORING]

[CROWD BOOING]

OHH. WAY TO
DISTRACT ME, KRONK.

[SCREECH]

I DID IT! I DID IT!
I'M THE PLAYMAKER.

BASK IN
MY SPORTS SUPERSTARDOM.

KUZCO SCORE
WRONG BASKET.

Yzma: GET YOUR KRONKIES BRAND
BREAKFAST CEREAL,

FEATURING
SPORT SUPERSTAR KRONK!

THEY'RE...BRILLIANT!

UH, NO, THANKS.

OUR TEAM STINKS.

I'M TOO DISHEARTENED
TO BUY ANYTHING.

[GROWLS]

KUZCO REACHES
FOR THE FRIES...

DABS THEM IN KETCHUP...
DABS THEM AGAIN,

AND IT'S GOOD!

UH-OH, FOLKS.
MALINA STEPS UP TO THE LINE.

AND SHE DOES NOT LOOK HAPPY.

KUZCO, THE WAY
YOU PLAYED LAST NIGHT
WAS EMBARRASSING.

I MEAN, IT WAS
THE MOST SELFISH DISPLAY
I'VE EVER SEEN.

OH, THANKS.
HEY, YOU KNOW, AS
THE TEAM'S PLAYMAKER,

I GET MY PICK OF
CHEERLEADERS TODAY.
AND LUCKY FOR YOU,

YOU JUST HAPPEN
TO BE IN MY TOP 3.

ALL YOU DID WAS
THROW UP TERRIBLE SHOTS
AND HOG THE BALL.

IN FACT,
YOU STILL HAVE IT WITH YOU.

GOTTA BE READY
IN CASE SOMEONE
NEEDS A PLAY MADE.

KUZCO, IF YOU KEEP THIS UP,
TOPANANZBI AND EMPIRE HIGH
ARE GONNA RUN ALL OVER YOU.

IN FACT, I DOUBT YOU GUYS
WILL WIN A GAME ALL YEAR.

SAYS YOU.

I'LL BET YOU A DATE
WE WIN AT LEAST
ONE GAME.

OHH, FINE.
I'LL TAKE THE BET,

BUT JUST TO PROVE TO YOU
THAT SELFISHNESS NEVER PAYS OFF.

HA HA! GOTCHA!

OUR NEXT GAME IS AGAINST
AN ALL-GIRL SCHOOL.
IT'S A GUARANTEED WIN.

AND KUZCO SCORES!

CAN YOU IMAGINE?
THEY'LL BE ALL,

[HIGH-PITCHED VOICE]
OOH, SHOULD I BRAID MY HAIR
OR SHOOT THE BALL?

I DON'T WANT
TO GET A REBOUND.
I MIGHT BREAK A NAIL.

[BOTH LAUGH]

GIRLS PLAYING INCA-BALL--
I'D LIKE TO SEE THAT.

PLEASE WELCOME
TONIGHT'S OPPONENT,

THE AMAZONIAN ACADEMY
ALL-STARS.
[CROWD CHEERING]

[BLOWS WHISTLE]

[CROWD GROANS]

OW! I BROKE A NAIL.

OK. THAT WAS
TOTALLY UNFAIR.

THEY WERE ALL TALL
AND ATHLETIC AND GOOD.

BUT DON'T YOU WORRY.

I'VE GOT A TRICK
UP MY SLEEVE
FOR THE NEXT GAME.

WHERE'S KUZCO?
WHO CARES? WITHOUT HIM,

ONE OF US MIGHT ACTUALLY
GET TO TAKE A SHOT.

HAVE NO FEAR.
YOUR PLAYMAKER IS HERE.

PSST. DON'T TELL ANYONE,
BUT I SNUCK INTO YZMA'S LAB

AND SWIPED A GIRAFFE POTION
TO MAKE ME TALLER.

WHOA! UHH!

[CROWD GROANS]

[GRUNTING]

WELL, THERE'S ONLY
ONE GAME LEFT IN THE SEASON
AND IT'S AGAINST EMPIRE HIGH.

WANNA CALL OFF THE BET?

NO. JUST WAIT.

YOU'RE ABOUT TO SEE
WHY EVERYONE CALLS ME
THE PLAYMAKER.

NOBODY CALLS YOU THAT.
AAH!
[CRASH]

IT'S NOT EVEN
A REAL POSITION!

LOOK AT
ALL THIS LEFTOVER CEREAL.

YOU HAVEN'T HELPED ME
SELL A SINGLE BOX.

I CAN'T START A CEREAL EMPIRE
WITH A LOSER AS MY SPOKESMAN.

WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO?
I NEVER EVEN GET THE BALL.

KUZCO IS
A TOTAL BALL HOG!

OR...TECHNICALLY,
BALL GIRAFFE
IN THE LAST GAME.

WHICH IS PRECISELY WHY
I'VE RECRUITED A NEW SPOKESMAN.

[GASPS]
TOPANANZBI?

[GASPS]
FROM EMPIRE HIGH?

[GASPS]
OUR BITTER RIVAL?

[GASPS]
THAT WE'RE
PLAYING TOMORROW?

[GASPS]
I CAN'T QUIT GASPING!

[GASPS]
UHH...
[CRASH]

Kuzco: WELL, TEAM,
IT'S BEEN A TOUGH SEASON.

BUT THANKS TO A FLAW
IN THE PLAY-OFF SYSTEM,

IF WE WIN THIS GAME TONIGHT,
NOT ONLY WILL WE BE CROWNED
LEAGUE CHAMPIONS,

BUT WE'LL ALSO SAVE
THE TEEN REC CENTER.

WHAT TEEN REC CENTER?
ALL RIGHT, FORGET

TEEN REC CENTER.
THE POINT IS,

I'VE DONE A LOT
OF SOUL-SEARCHING

AND STUDIED
A LOT OF GAME FILM.

AND I KNOW
WHAT WE NEED TO DO
TO WIN THIS GAME--

PASS ME THE BALL MORE!

OH, FORGET THIS!
COME ON, GUYS.
LET'S GO DOWN TO MUDKA'S.

KUZCO CAN PLAY
THE FINAL GAME BY HIMSELF.

AH, WHO NEEDS 'EM?

THERE'S NO "TEAM" IN "I."
AND "I" CAN WIN THIS
ALL BY MYSELF.

[BLOWS WHISTLE]

[CROWD CHEERING]

YEAH, YEAH. LUCKY SHOT.

[CROWD GROANING]

Guaca: AND AFTER
THE FIRST HALF OF PLAY,

IT'S EMPIRE HIGH 137,
KUZCO ACADEMY ZERO.

ALL RIGHT. MAYBE I DO
NEED THOSE GUYS A LITTLE.

[SNORING]

GUYS, LOOK.
I JUST WANT TO SAY--

SEE, THE TRUTH IS,
THE TRUTH IS...

OH, MAN.
HOW DO I SAY THIS?

HERE. THIS 10-SECOND
TRUTH SERUM SHOULD HELP.

OK. THE TRUTH IS,
I GOT SO CAUGHT UP

IN BEING A SPORT SUPERSTAR
THAT I BECAME
A TOTALLY SELFISH TEAMMATE.

BUT NOW I REALIZE
INCA-BALL IS A TEAM GAME.
AND I REALLY NEED YOU GUYS.

ALSO, I SOMETIMES WISH
I HAD A BRIGHT-PINK PEGASUS

TO FLY ME TO
THE LAND OF RAINBOW DREAMS.

OK...KRONK, NEXT TIME,
GIVE ME THE 8-SECOND
TRUTH SERUM.

IT TOOK A BIG MAN
TO ADMIT THAT, KUZCO...

ALL OF THAT.
WHAT DO YOU SAY, GUYS?

LET'S DO IT FOR US.
AND THE SCHOOL!

AND THE TEEN REC CENTER!

[BLOWS WHISTLE]

[CROWD ROARING]

KUZCO, I'M OPEN!

[CROWD BOOS]

[CROWD CHEERING]

ALL RIGHT!

WHOO-HOO! GO, KRONK!
WHOO-HOO!

GET YOUR
TOPANOS BREAKFAST CEREAL,

FEATURING
THE GREAT TOPANANZBI.

DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING
WITH KRONK ON THE COVER?

WHAT?!
BUT--BUT I JUST...

[GROWLS]

Guaca: THIS IS IT, FOLKS.
ONLY 5 SECONDS LEFT.

WHAT AN EXCITING FINISH!

[HEART BEATING]

[BUZZER]
AND IT'S GOOD!

DO YOU BELIEVE IN MIRACLES?

KUZCO ACADEMY HAS COME BACK
FROM A 137-POINT DEFICIT

TO LOSE BY ONLY 89 POINTS!
[CROWD CHEERING]

GOOD GAME, KUZCO.
YOU PLAYED GREAT.

I KNOW! SO, WHEN ARE WE
GOING ON OUR DATE?

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

YOU LOST THE GAME,
SO YOU LOST THE BET.

WHICH MEANS YOU WON,
SO YOU GET TO
TAKE ME ON A DATE.

[BUZZER]
OH, SUN IN MY EYES.

[BUZZER]
AH, WIND CARRIED IT.

[BUZZER]
BASKET WAS SHAKING.

[BUZZER]
FAN ON THE COURT.

[BUZZER]
OW.

[BIRDS CHIRPING]

NOW, FOR TOMORROW'S ASSIGNMENT,

I WANT EVERYONE TO RESEARCH
THEIR FAMILY TREES.

SWEET! MY ASSIGNMENT
IS ALREADY DONE.

'CAUSE I WAS BIRTHED
FROM A GLORIOUS UNION
BETWEEN THE MOON AND THE STARS.

KUZCO!
IT'S ON THE CEILING.

[CHOIR SINGS
AND ORCHESTRA PLAYS]

FINE, CUZCO.
YOU CAN TAKE A NAP

WHILE THE REST
OF THE CLASS WORKS.

YAY!
[SNORING]

FAMILY TREE...
I ALWAYS WONDERED
WHERE I CAME FROM.

HEY, KEEP YOUR
WEIRD WONDERINGS TO YOURSELF.

ME TRYING TO NAP-NAP.

HEY, PAPI, WHERE DOES
OUR FAMILY COME FROM?

HEH HEH HEH. WELL,

I GUESS IT'S TIME
YOU LEARNED THE TRUTH.

SON, WE'RE A LITTLE, WELL,
DIFFERENT FROM OTHER PEOPLE--

THE HUGE PONCHOS,
THE TALKING WITH ANIMALS, THE...

PAUSES IN OUR SPEECH,
THE WAY OTHERS MOCK US--

THEY DO?!
OF COURSE. BUT,

IT'S NOTHING TO BE ASHAMED OF.

YOU SEE, OUR FAMILY COMES
FROM A FARAWAY PLACE.

[GASPS]
BANANA-LAND?!
NO, KRONK.

THAT'S NOT A REAL PLACE.
REALLY?

DIDN'T WE JUST GO THERE?
WHERE THE MONKEYS
MADE US PIES...

NO, SON. THE PLACE WE COME FROM
IS A LITTLE...DIFFERENT.

THIS IS
MY FAMILY'S FRUIT TREE,

WHICH WE'VE
DEPENDED ON FOR YEARS

AS OUR ONLY SOURCE
OF SHADE, FIREWOOD,
AND SUSTENANCE.

WRONG KIND
OF FAMILY TREE, GUACA.

AW.

NEXT UP IS KRONK.

[IMITATES FANFARE]
TA-DA!

YOU'RE PROBABLY ALL WONDERING
WHY I'M DRESSED LIKE THIS.

YOU SEE, I'M NOT INCAN
LIKE THE REST OF YOU.

MY FAMILY IS FROM
A GREAT VILLAGE CALLED...

KRONKENITZA!

UH, YEAH. I HEARD
PEOPLE FROM KRONKENITZA

HAVE A PREHENSILE TAIL
AND EAT BRAINS
FOR BREAKFAST.

THOSE ARE RUMORS.

KRONKENITZANS ARE
A PROUD PEOPLE.

WE CREATED THE CALENDAR,
THE CORDLESS HAMMER,

AND THE NOVELTY HAND BUZZER.

AAH!
[BUZZES]

YOU KNOW, KRONK,
I THINK IT'S GREAT

THAT YOU DECIDED
TO EMBRACE YOUR ROOTS.

YEAH, IT'S KIND OF COOL
BEING DIFFERENT.

WHAT?! BEING DIFFERENT
ISN'T COOL.

IT'S SOMETHING
TO RIDICULE AND LAUGH AT.

HA HA! DIFFERENT BOY.
KUZCO!

ALL RIGHT. IF YOU WANT
TO BE A WEIRDO OUTCAST
AND EAT BRAINS FOR BREAKFAST,

YOU GO RIGHT AHEAD.
I DON'T EAT BRAINS!

YEAH, WELL,
JUST TO BE SAFE...

WEIRDO.

PAY ATTENTION, KRONK.
I HAVE THE PERFECT PLAN
TO FOIL KUZCO.

FIRST, WE'LL TRAVEL
TO ANTARCTICA
AND COLLECT 26 TONS OF ICE.

THEN, WHILE
KUZCO IS SLEEPING,

WE'LL MELT THE ICE
AND FLOOD HIS ROOM.
HEH HEH HEH!

IT WILL WORK SWIMMINGLY!
HA HA HA!

AS LONG AS
HE DOESN'T SWIM.

YEAH, SURE. WHATEVER.
WHAT'S WRONG, KRONK?

I HAVE THIS, UH, FRIEND
WHO GETS MADE FUN OF
FOR BEING DIFFERENT...

MY FRIEND, THAT IS,
NOT ME. HEH HEH.

WHAT DO YOU THINK I SHOULD DO--
FOR MY FRIEND?

JOIN IN ON THE TAUNTING.
THAT WILL TEACH HIM
TO BE DIFFERENT.

NOW, WHO IS THIS WEIRDO?
HEH HEH. I WANT IN
ON THIS ACTION.

HEY, KRONK,
I WAS THINKING

ABOUT WHAT
I SAID YESTERDAY.

AND REALIZED
I WAS BEING
REALLY, REALLY...

HILARIOUS!
SO I STAYED UP ALL NIGHT

COMING UP WITH
KRONKENITZAN JOKES.
AHEM. ALL RIGHT.

[SOUTHERN ACCENT]
IF A LLAMA HAS EVER HAD TO
HELP YOU WITH YOUR HOMEWORK,

YOU MIGHT BE A KRONKENITZAN.
HA HA!

GOOD ONE, SIR!
HEH, YEAH, YEAH. ALL RIGHT.

IF YOU THINK A PIGPEN IS
SOMETHING A PIG WRITES WITH,

YOU MIGHT BE A KRONKENITZAN.

[LAUGHTER]

WHA...WHA...?

THOSE ARE HALF-TRUTHS.
[SOBBING]

[CRICKETS CHIRPING]

[TWITTERS]

I'M SORRY, BUCKY.
I'VE MADE UP MY MIND--

GOING TO KRONKENITZA,
WHERE NO ONE WILL MAKE FUN OF ME
FOR BEING DIFFERENT.

UH, MORE DASHES,
PLEASE?

[BELL RINGING]

THANKS.

DASH, DASH, DASH...

AND I'M HERE.

WOW!

♪ I'M HERE, I'M HERE,
AND THE SKIES ARE SO CLEAR ♪

♪ IT'S ALL SO GREAT,
I MAY EVEN FIND A MATE ♪

♪ AND LOOK, THERE'S MORE,
LEVERS ARE ON EVERY DOOR ♪

♪ I CAN'T BELIEVE
THAT I AM HERE ♪

♪ NO ONE TO LAUGH
OR SMIRK OR SNEER ♪

♪ JUST PEOPLE
CHATTING WITH THE DEER ♪

♪ AND FRIDGES FILLED WITH
COLD ROOT BEER ♪

♪ THE KITCHENS ARE
SO BIG AND NICE ♪

♪ WON'T HAVE TO MAKE
THE SAME THING TWICE ♪

♪ DON'T HAVE TO GO
WHERE YZMA GOES ♪

♪ THE SHOPS ALL HAVE
MY SIZE IN CLOTHES ♪

♪ MY LOT IN LIFE'S BEEN
SO UNCLEAR ♪

♪ BUT THAT'S ALL CHANGED
NOW THAT I'M HERE ♪

"I'M SORRY, YZMA,
BUT I NEED TO BE WHERE I FIT IN.

"SINCERELY, KRONK.

P.S. PLEASE RELAY THE NEWS
TO PRINCIPAL AMZY."

OHH. LOOKS LIKE
I NEED A NEW ASSISTANT.

BUT WHO?
THE ONLY PERSON QUALIFIED IS,

WELL, ME.
[GASPS] THAT'S IT!

I'LL USE MY CLONING SPRAY
TO CLONE MYSELF.

IT'S BRILLIANT!

IT'S BRILLIANT!

OK. I'VE GOT A PLAN.
ME, TOO.

FIRST, WE'LL GROW
A HUGE VENUS'S-FLYTRAP.

THEN, WE'LL ENTER IT
INTO THE LOCAL FAIR

AND WIN
THE FIRST-PLACE TROPHY.

WE'LL USE THE TROPHY
TO CLOBBER KUZCO TO SMITHEREENS!

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

IT'S BRILLIANT!
ME, TOO.

WELCOME
TO KRONKENITZA, FRIEND.

I'M THE MAYOR, WITH THE SASH.
PUT HER THERE.

[BUZZES]

I GOTCHA!

[BOTH LAUGHING]

YOU GOT ME!

OK, THAT'S ENOUGH.

AND HERE'S A STATUE
OF OUR TOWN'S FOUNDER,

ADOLPHUS KRONK,

WHO WON OUR INDEPENDENCE
IN THE GREAT COOKOFF OF '37.

WHAT A PROUD HISTORY!

AND OVER HERE,
OUR MISS KRONKENITZA PAGEANT.

[DEEP VOICE]
ONE WISH--WORLD PEACE.
THAT'S RIGHT.

THIS HERE IS OUR TOWN'S
HITCHING POST...

FOR, UH, HITCHING STUFF.

PROBABLY SHOULDN'T HAVE
ENDED THE TOUR WITH THAT.

WOW! I'VE NEVER FELT
SO AT HOME.

Flaco Moleguaco: AND SO,
BY SIMPLY USING A SLIPCOVER,

NO ONE COULD TELL
I HAD PULLED THE COUCH
FROM THE DUMPSTER.

MR. MOLEGUACO, WHERE'S KRONK?

OH...RIGHT. KRONK...

PRINCIPAL AMZY SAID
HE MOVED AWAY
BECAUSE HE FELT DIFFERENT.

I WOULD HAVE
MENTIONED IT FIRST,

BUT THE DUMPSTER-COUCH STORY
SIMPLY HAD TO BE TOLD.

[GASPS]
KRONK'S GONE?
THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!

SO? WHAT DO WE NEED KRONK FOR?

HE'S OUR FRIEND.

UH, YEAH, A FRIEND

THAT HELPS YZMA TRY TO
DESTROY ME, LIKE, EVERY WEEK.

OK, POINT TAKEN.
BUT WE NEED HIM
FOR OTHER STUFF, TOO,

LIKE, UM...
MAKING SPINACH PUFFS...

YECCH.
AND TALKING TO ANIMALS...

BORING.
AND OPENING BIG PICKLE JARS.

BUY SMALLER PICKLES.
WELL, KRONK'S ALSO

THE ONLY ONE IN TOWN
WHO WALKS OLD LADIES
ACROSS THE STREET.

DID THE SIGNAL TURN?
I CAN'T TELL.

OH, I'M SURE IT'S SAFE.

[BRAKES SCREECH]
[HORN HONKS]
[CRASH]

Yzma: KRONK!

HEY, THEY'RE THE ONES
WHO CHOSE TO BE OLD.

[GASPS]
HEY, MR. MAYOR!

I MADE A TRAY OF MY
SIGNATURE SPINACH PUFFS
FOR THE POTLUCK.

OH, GREAT.
PUT 'EM WITH EVERYONE ELSE'S.

HEH HEH HEH.
HEY, LITTLE GIRL,

YOU NEED ANY HELP
OPENING THAT BIG PICKLE JAR?

[DEEP VOICE]
NAH, I GOT IT.

EXCUSE ME, MA'AM.
CAN I HELP YOU
ACROSS THE STREET?

HEY, GET IN LINE, BUDDY.

OH. WELL, I...

GUESS I'LL JUST
HAVE TO WAIT FOR
ANOTHER OLD LADY.

UH, SHE'S THE ONLY ONE.
LET'S HOPE
SHE COMES BACK TOMORROW.

SURE DON'T NEED ME HERE.

PROBABLY DON'T NEED ME
BACK HOME, EITHER.

BOY, I SURE DON'T NEED KRONK.

Girl: AAH! PANTHER!
[CROWD SCREAMING]

[ROARING]

DON'T WORRY, EVERYBODY!
I HAVE A BIG JAR OF PICKLES.

PANTHERS HATE PICKLES.
[GRUNTING]

BUT I CAN'T GET IT OPEN!

GIVE ME THAT.
[GRUNTING]

OK, I LOOSENED IT FOR YOU.

I WISH
KRONK WAS HERE
TO TALK TO IT.

DOES ANYBODY
SPEAK PANTHER?

NO, BUT I GOT THIS
PANTHER-LANGUAGE SCROLL.

GIVE ME THAT.
OK, LET ME SEE HERE.

UH, ROAR, ROAR, SNARL,
GROWL, GROWL, ROAR.

[ROARS]

UH, YOUR BREATH SMELLS LIKE
A MOLDY MANGO AND, UH,
YOUR MOTHER WAS A LLAMA.

YAY! I DID IT.

SEE? I TOLD YOU
WE DIDN'T NEED KRONK.

[ROARS]

WE NEED KRONK!
WE NEED KRONK!

Kronk:
THAT'S ALL I WANTED TO HEAR.

YOU KNOW, I REALIZED SOMETHING
DURING MY TIME IN KRONKENITZA.

KRONK! UH, PANTHER!
OH, RIGHT.

GROWL, GROWL,
ROAR, SNARL, ROAR?

[ROARS]
HMM. GOTCHA.

[PURRING]
THAT'S A GOOD KITTY.

HE LOST LOST
A CONTACT LENS.

KRONK SAVED THE DAY.

[CROWD CHEERING]

OH, THANKS.
ANYWAY, AS I WAS SAYING,

VILLAGE FULL OF KRONKS
HAD ITS CHARM,

BUT I LIKE FEELING NEEDED
AND BEING DIFFERENT.

GIVES ME THAT CERTAIN...
JE NE SAIS KRONK.

KUZCO, IS THERE
SOMETHING YOU WANTED
TO SAY TO KRONK?

YEAH.

HYAH! DON'T EAT
MY BRAIN.

KUZCO!

[SIGHS]
AND I'M GLAD
YOU'RE BACK.

SORRY ABOUT ALL
THE INCREDIBLY
FUNNY INSULTS.

IT'S OK, BUDDY.
GLAD TO BE HOME.

UH, KRONK, HON,
WE GOT ONE MORE PROBLEM
WE NEED YOU TO FIX.

HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO
CLOBBER KUZCO WITH
A SECOND-PLACE RIBBON?

DON'T BLAME ME,
YOU WITHERED OLD DINOSAUR.

2 YZMAS? NO, THANKS.

SQUAWKETY-SQUAWKEN-SQUAWK!

[SQUAWKING]
AAH!

THAT TAKES CARE OF THAT.

YOU DO REALIZE
I'M THE CLONE, RIGHT?

YEAH, I KNOW.

KRONK!

UNFORTUNATELY, OUR GUEST KRONK

DECIDED TO GO BACK
TO HIS HOME VILLAGE.

BUT THERE'S NO REASON
WE CAN'T STILL ENJOY OUR
DELICIOUS BREAKFAST...

OF BRAINS!

[ALL EXCLAIMING]

TASTES LIKE MONKEY.
TASTES LIKE LLAMA.

I COULD EAT BRAINS
ALL DAY!

PASS THE BUTTER. OH! OH!
OH, DELICIOUS.

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