The Cosby Show (1984–1992): Season 8, Episode 17 - The Getaway - full transcript

Sondra and Elvin prepare to move to their own home in New Jersey, but Cliff is still hesitant to believe it will really happen. But the movers arrive and boxes are packed on the truck.

♪♪ [theme]

Hey. Hey.

Come back here.

You know the rules about entering
this room without knocking, don't you?

And you also know the rules

about putting
stickers on Granddad.

But we're moving.

That's right.

You are moving today!

Yes! But what does
that have to do with this?

Daddy's putting blue dots
on all the big, heavy things



we want to take with us.

Well, I feel honored to be
considered a big, heavy thing.

But I am going to stay here.

Bye-bye. Bye.

And don't forget to knock if
you ever get in this house again.

Bye. Hi. Hi.

Cliff. Sondra and
Elvin are moving today.

Come on, let's hit it. Let's go.

Come on.

I'm not gonna get
excited about this.

I've been burned too many times.

I am not going to
get excited about it.

Dear, I swear, if I believed
that those people were leaving,

I would go downstairs,



take every single
box they have packed,

strap it on my back, and crawl

across the George
Washington Bridge myself.

Well, you better get
out your kneepads,

'cause the house
has passed inspection,

escrow has closed,

and the moving van is
arriving at any moment,

and they are going.
They are leaving today.

Don't be too sure.

They're not leaving.
I'm telling you.

Every time, something happens.

Now, you can call it intuition,
you can call it an educated guess,

but I am not sure

that those people are leaving.

And with that attitude,
they may not leave.

They may never get out of here.

Oh, don't worry
about the attitude.

I'm gonna have an attitude.

You wanna see it?

You say, "Well, Dad, Mom,
good-bye." Go ahead, say that.

Well, Dad, Mom, good-bye.

Elvin? Yes?

Where does this box go?

Our house.

And where is the
moving van taking us?

Our house. [laughing]

And where are we snuggling
up and sleeping tonight?

Our house! [squeals]

[both laughing]

♪♪ [humming]

Ah! Get outta here!
Get outta here!

Get outta here! Get outta here!

Mom, Dad. Yeah.

Oh, man, the time has
come. We're gonna miss you.

Ah, but you have no idea

what this house is gonna
be like without you in it.

Well, look, don't worry,
'cause we're organized

for the swiftest
move out possible.

Well, you should be 'cause
you've had a lot of time to plan for it.

Ha ha ha!

That's all right.

Hey, that's our stuff!

And it's going that
way. Checkout time.

Hey, hey, you guys, that
stuff has to be packed properly.

[Olivia] They're in
a box, aren't they?

Mom, there are
some boxes upstairs

that need to go to
the station wagon.

Oh, oh, right. Okay.

My station wagon?

Whatever they need, dear.

So, Elvin, that means that you're gonna
have to get there ahead of the movers,

because you're the only one
with the keys to the house.

Keys... Keys to the house?

I thought the realtor
gave them to you.

Why would she have
given them to me?

Muffin... Muffin, y-you were the
last one to go on the walk-through.

But, Elvin, you were the
last one to see the realtor.

But, honey, I don't have them.

How can this be possible? You
must have them. I don't have them.

Look in the pocket!

I don't have them.

Please! Look in the pocket!

Oh. [chuckles]

Somebody must've
put them there 'cause...

Ha ha ha. Gave us a
scare there for a minute.

[doorbell rings]

[Man] Movers!

The movers are here!
The movers are here!

Yes! My own room
at last! Come on!

Hey, guys, why don't you go
upstairs and finish packing, okay?

[Kids] Okay. Movers.

Yes! Mr. Vincente
and Mr. Velarde. Hey.

Dr. Tibideaux, we got a hungry
van outside, and it's feeding time.

Gentlemen, this is my father-in-law,
Dr. Huxtable. How do you do?

It's a pleasure, sir. Thank you.

John Velarde. Nice to see you.

All right. Dan Vincente.
V. and V. and Sons.

Where we make sure
all your precious things,

they don't become
precious memories. Good.

Now, if you'd sign this waiver.

So you're V. and V.
And Sons. Mm-hmm.

So, um, wh-where
are... Are the sons?

Doc, you're looking at 'em.

Yeah, I... I understand.

Okay, then, where
are the fathers?

[muttering]

Moving is a very
difficult business.

Oh. I'm sorry. Sorry about that.

Well, then, where's the crew?

Oh, Dr. Huxtable, at
V. and V. and Sons,

we move with our
heads, not our hands. Ah.

Dr. Huxtable. Yes.

You're a man of science. Yes.

You understand
physics. Absolutely.

You know about leverage,
incline planes, wedges.

Yes. Well, those are the three
guys we hired to work for us.

They never call in
sick, they're never late,

and they never ask for a raise.

Hey, V, let's take a couple of
those guys and move this clock rack.

Sure, V.

Look at that, huh? No
muscle strain, no hernia.

Just a couple of
brains doing the job.

And we're not even gonna
charge you for that, Dr. H.

Oh, well, it goes back,
'cause that's my clock.

Oh. Gentlemen, all we need to do

is get the dotted
items in the basement

and the boxes in here, just as
we went over in the estimate.

All right. You got it.
Hey, let's move it out.

It's game time! Hey, Doc,
will you sign the waiver?

Thank you.

What time is it, Danny?
It's moving time, baby!

[shouts]

Hey, Elvin!

Basement's clear!

Bedroom's clear. All right!

Truck's ready to roll.

Is this the last box, or
is this the last box, V.?

Hey, this is the last box, O.

Are we moved or what, baby?

All right!

Dad, thank you
for all your help.

My brother. [chuckling]

Are you sure you don't
want me to help you

move everything
out of the house?

No, no, Dad. That's okay.

Actually, Sondra
and I were hoping

that you'd kind of stay
here and watch the twins.

Well, y-you're gonna take
them with you, aren't you?

Yes, yes. We're gonna take them.

Just... Just for now
while we're unloading.

Oh. Oh, yeah. Sure. Okay.

Dad's gonna stay
with the kids. Oh.

What do you mean "Oh"? What?

Well, Dad, the last time
we asked you to babysit,

the kids ended up
in a makeshift jail.

It was not a jail. I
told you, it was a fort.

Fort.

Yeah, well, anyway, look, um,

do you think that you
could make it a special day?

This is their last day at
Grandma and Grandpa's.

Yes, Dad, please do. Make
it a special memory day.

Memory day. Special. Okay.

Okay, sweetheart, I'm going to
take Rudy and Olivia in my car.

Yes. Oh, oh, Dad, I need
the keys to the station wagon.

Right here. Thank you.

Got it. There you
go. I wanna go.

[Cliff] Okay. Me, too!

Oh, no. Kids, you're gonna
stay here with Grandpa

and have a special
memory day, okay?

But you said if we sit
in this house any longer,

you'll go crazy.

She's cute, isn't she?

Winnie, Winnie, Winnie.

Now, listen, don't worry, 'cause
Mom and Dad are coming back,

and then tonight, you're gonna
spend the night in your own little bed!

That's right, that's
right. Well, thanks, Dad.

Okay, honey. Take care.
Okay, you kids be good.

[Kids] Bye. Drive carefully.

Yes, because you
have to come back. Bye!

Yes. Thank you, Dad.

Yes. Thank you.

Now, um, Granddad

is... is going to, uh,
to take a little nap.

Mm-mm.

Why can't I take a nap?

'Cause you're supposed
to be taking care of us.

D-Do you know anything
about, um, bears?

Well, bears happen to be

a very, very special,
special animal.

You know why?

Because bears do what?

Hibernate.

Hibernate is correct!

Now, bears
hibernate in the cave.

Aha! So, here.

I'll put this pillow here

and this other pillow
around on this side,

and you two will be
the grandbaby bears.

So you get in there,
and you hibernate.

That's it. That's it.

You're doing just fine.

Now, we're... we're hibernating.

[Kids laughing]

[laughs] You guys are funny.

[makes thudding
noise] [Kids laughing]

You know about Santa Claus?

Okay. You... You sit here,

and you sit here.

That's it.

Now, you keep an
eye on that phone.

You can't make any noise.

Just listen for when Santa Claus

rings that phone,

and then you wake me up, okay?

Do you guys understand?

Okay.

Keep watching.

I don't know what
time he's gonna call,

but he's gonna call.

What is it? What do
you want? [Kids giggling]

He called. He...

When did Santa Claus call? Now.

He didn't call.

What did you say
to him? Nothing.

You said nothing?

You don't think I know
Santa Claus, do you?

You don't... All right. Uh-uh.

You think I'm kidding.
I'll call him right now.

Sit down. You guys, sit down.

You guys are in
big, big trouble.

And if he tells
me... Huh? I know...

I know. Do you know him?

You know I know him, and
I'm gonna call him right now.

'Cause this is long distance.

6, 8.

Hey! S.C., what's happening?

[laughs] Yeah, this is C.H.

How ya feeling?

Yeah, I'm here with
the grandchildren.

Yeah, they know all about
you. They know all about you.

They know you come
down the chimney,

they know you give the presents,

and you give presents
to kids who are good.

And they haven't
been too good, S.C.

Nah, nah, I'm
trying to take a nap,

and they keep jumping
up and down, you know,

and they come and they
touch me and do stuff like that.

So what do you think?

Yeah, yeah.

Well, just one second.

Are you all gonna
let me take a nap?

Mm-mm.

S.C., pass over.

No, no, not the holiday.

No. I mean, go over their house.

No, no. They've... They've
moved to New Jersey.

Go right on o...

They're looking
serious now, S.C.

Think we ought to back off?

Okay. Thank you.

My best to the missus, S.C.

Yeah. And how
are the little guys?

When did he pass away?

You know how to play
hide-and-go-seek? [Kids] Yes!

All right now.
Here. This is yours.

Where's the other one? Okay.

You got this one. This is yours.

Put it in front of your
face so you can breathe.

All right. Keep your
eyes closed. No cheating.

I'm gonna go hide, all right?

Now, you count to 10. Ready? Go.

[Kids] 1, 2, 3, 4,
5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10!

[creaking]

[crashing, clock chime clanging]

[Kids] Ooh!

I'm not afraid of Mrs. Huxtable.

You can't fix that.

This is a grandfather clock.

'Cause only the
grandfather can fix it.

You know the good part
about being grandchildren?

What?

That they can keep a secret.

As a matter of fact,
there's a special secret club.

Would... Would
you like to join that?

Yeah.

Raise your right hand.

You'll repeat after me.

Hickory dickory dock.

Hickory dickory dock.

I don't know who
broke the clock.

I don't know who
broke the clock.

We were walking around.

We were walking around.

And the clock fell down.

And the clock fell down.

Hickory.

Hickory.

Dickory. Dickory.

Dock. Dock.

Hickory dickory dock.

Hickory dickory dock.

Grandpa... Grandpa...

Did not break the clock.

Did not break the clock.

[doorbell rings]

Dickory dock.

Y dock... y dock.

Ry dock.

Hickory dickory.

Hickory dickory dock.

I don't know who...
Broke the clock.

Sorry to bother you, Dr. Huxtable,
but we're missing our tape guns.

Oh, yeah. They're
right there. Yeah.

[both gasp]

What... What happened?

What is this? Oh!

Ooh, baby, are you in
trouble with your wife!

He's not afraid of her.

Um, fellas, there's
a clock place

about two blocks from here.

V. and V. To the rescue, Doc.

Yeah, okay. And we
can keep it on the Q.T.?

Uh, Doc, in other words,
nobody broke the clock.

[laughs] Hickory dickory.

Hickory dickory dock.

Nobody... Broke the clock.

Right.

Whoo!

Oh! Hey, kids, kids! Dad...

Your dad's here! Come
on! Get dressed! All right!

Here are your car keys.
Thank you, thank you.

That's it? We're
moved in! Yes. All right!

Whoo! Yeah. All
right! Congratulations!

Congratulations. It was a cinch,
you know, once we got out of here.

Yeah. Well, home sweet
home. Yeah. I got a... home.

I got a family. It feels
good. Yes. Please. All right.

Congratulations. So, what, is
Sondra coming to pick you up?

Okay. Well, Dad, that's... that's
kind of what I want to talk to you about.

Mm-hmm. What
is... What is it, Elvin?

Is... Is... Is the car broken?

No. No, the car is
fine. In fact, you know,

now that we're in the suburbs,

Sondra's gonna
need it a lot more.

That kind of leaves
us short one car,

if you know what I mean.

Elvin, what are you
saying? Okay. See,

I can't use the car during the day
if Sondra and the kids are using it.

So... [chuckles]

Take a train.

You cannot practice
emergency medicine

and get stuck on the
715 in from the 'burbs.

So you want me
to give you my car?

Give, give, give?

Dad, no.

What kind of a guy
do you think I am?

Hey, I'm a homeowner now.

I just wanna, you
know, make you an offer.

Come on now. Don't kid around.

Now, look, Elvin, if I give
you my car, No, no, no.

I have to buy
another car for myself.

Look, Dad, this is a deal
coming and going, you know?

I mean, it benefits both of us.

You get to get a new
car, which you deserve,

and I get to buy your old
secondhand car of questionable value.

I don't understand.
Why don't you just go

to a reputable used car
dealer and get a used car?

Dad, financing.

Financing. What about it?

You know... You know banks,
right? Yeah. Yeah. What about 'em?

You miss one payment, there's
a repo guy in your driveway

with your car on a hook.

I don't think I could stand
for the kids to see that.

You know, I'm a
homeowner now, you know.

They... They very well
could take away the house.

And then where do we end up?

Back here, I guess.

Okay, call your kids, man.

I can take the car?
No, take... Yes, yes.

Thank you, Dad. Kids... Kids,
come on! Take the kids outta here.

We're going! Come
on! Thanks, Dad.

[Elvin] Okay, let's say
good-bye to Grandpa.

He's being really very
nice to us. Yes, he has.

[Kids] Bye. Bye-bye.

Okay, now, go outside
and wait near the car, okay?

Wait near the car, okay?
Yeah. And do me a favor.

What? Give me the
keys to this house.

My keys. Yeah, yeah. Okay.

Okay, go ahead.
Go ahead outside?

Go ahead outside. You're
gonna give me the car keys?

I'm... I'm gonna give
you the keys. Okay.

Go on outside. You
haven't given me them yet.

Go outside. Okay,
now, just put your arm in.

Thanks, Dad. Yeah, yeah, I know.

[knock at door]

Can I come in?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Come on, come on.

I'm just coming in for a
second. Don't even look at me.

I'm gone. I'm not here anymore.

Ignore, okay? I'm not here.

♪♪ [theme]

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