The Cosby Show (1984–1992): Season 6, Episode 26 - The Storyteller - full transcript

♪♪ [theme]

This is the best elevator
music I've ever heard.

Mmm.

Denise?

Hi.

Guess what. What?

Kye is going to the zoo tomorrow,
and her parents invited me to go along.

Mm-hmm. Can I?

Sure.

Oh, wait, wait, no.

Sweetheart, I'm
sorry, you can't go.



But you said sure.

I know, but I said that before
I realized why you can't.

This is a special
weekend, remember?

My great-great Aunt
Gramtee is coming to town.

It's her birthday. We're all
gonna have dinner tonight.

We even have a
cake especially for her.

Then tomorrow we're going to spend
the whole day together and go to church.

Can I have cake
and go to the zoo?

Well, I'm sorry. We promised Gramtee
that we'd all go to church together.

But I didn't promise her.

I sort of promised for you.

Why?

Because I know you're
going to love Gramtee,

and she's going to love you.



And besides, you
love going to church.

You get to hear stories about
God and see all your friends, right?

- Right.
- So we're going to go to church.

But God wants
me to go to the zoo.

I think God would be
happier if you went to church.

But God made the animals, and
that's why I should go to the zoo.

God also made me your
stepmom and put me in charge,

and I say since Gramtee's
coming all the way from Virginia,

we're all going to spend the day
tomorrow together and go to church.

Okay, but next time, I
hope God talks to me first.

[Rudy] Gramtee's here!

Let's go see.

Mom, I tried to get her to come around
the back where there are no stairs,

but she wouldn't listen to me.

Are your legs tired?

My legs aren't tired.

Gramtee!

Oh, hi, there.

Did you get all the
letters I sent you?

- Every one.
- Ohh.

Hello, Gramtee.

Mom says the last time you
saw me, I was only 10 years old!

You sure grew into
a beautiful woman.

And loud, too.

I know Rudy.

Hi, Gramtee.

And my Denise.

But who is this?

I'm Olivia, and I just
want to go to the zoo.

Ohh!

This is my stepdaughter
that I wrote you about.

Oh, so this is Olivia.

You're even prettier
than Denise described.

Give me a hug.

Ah ho ho.

My, my.

Well, you can just go
ahead and ignore me.

Now, who would
ignore a face like that?

Hello, Heathcliff.

Come on and sit down.

Let me take your shawl, Gramtee.

Oh, thank you. Yes, I
would like to sit down.

Now, you're sure once
you get into this thing,

you're going to be
able to get back up?

Well, now, why don't
we just try and see?

There.

Is that enough to
close your mouth?

She told you, Dad.

Gramtee, how was your
stay with Anna and Russell?

I was teasing
Russell about the time

when I used to hold him on my
knee when he was a little fella.

You knew Grandpa
when he was a baby?

She sure did. She changed
your grandfather's diapers.

You used to change
Grandpa's diapers?

Yes, baby. And I changed
your father's diapers, too.

Dad in diapers.
Now, that's a picture.

What was dad like as a baby?

He was a mess.

Well, it was nice of
you to come over, Gram.

Sorry you can't stay.

No! No, no, Dad!

We want to hear more stories.

No, no, no, because
the stories are dumb.

Heathcliff, did you ever tell the
kids the story about you and Samson?

No, Gramtee, because
it's a dumb story.

No, Dad, we want to
hear this. Who's Samson?

Samson was a duck

who lived on my brother's
farm down in South Carolina.

Uh, don't you
have to take a nap?

Hush up, Cliff.

One summer, when he was 4
years old, your father came for a visit.

Now, Samson, every time
he would see your father,

he'd run up and peck
him on his shinbone.

Your daddy was
scared of that duck,

and every time that
duck came near him,

he would start crying
and just run away.

Quack, quack!

So, uh, Gramtee, uh, do you
have any nice young suitors?

I thought about marrying again,

but I don't want to be competing
with these 75-year-old women.

They don't have
any sense of pride.

They push, and shove...

and show their legs.

Gramtee, how old were
you when you got married?

I was 17.

Gramtee, why don't you
tell Vanessa what it was like

to socialize with the boys
when you were a teenager?

Well, we called
it courting time.

Now, if a boy cared
to call on a young lady,

he would get himself all
dressed up in a tie and everything.

Then he would get permission
from the parents to come to see you.

You mean he had to ask the parents if
he could just come over and hang out?

Mm-hmm. The father was
there, the mother was there.

Well, Gramtee, with
all those people around,

how did you ever get a
chance to be alone with a guy?

She's asking about kissing.

I'm serious, Rudy. Stop it.

A boy and a girl did a lot of
communicating, through eye contact.

And if they felt something
special for each other,

they would take a
walk and hold hands.

Of course, the chaperone
was always there.

Gramtee, are you saying
that you never did any kissing?

Let's just say there were times
when the chaperone wasn't looking.

Oh, I got to check the
oven. I got a roast in here.

- Oh, you're having pot roast?
- Yep.

Well, you know, Gramtee
can't chew that stuff.

Heathcliff. Huh.

- Hush up.
- For what?

Keep it up, and I'm going to go
get that duck to come and get you.

Gramtee is amazing,
isn't she, Mom?

Yes.

She thinks clearly,
she's focused.

I hope I'm like
that when I'm 98.

Sweetheart, I'd be happy
if you were like that at 22.

Gramtee changed her mind.

She wants some
apple juice with no ice.

Okay.

[ring]

Hello.

Hi, Kye. How are you?

Good. She's right here. Hold on.

It's Kye.

Hello, doll.

Listen, I can't go
to the zoo tomorrow.

Really?

I'll ask.

- Guess what.
- What?

Remember Kye's parents
were taking her to the zoo?

Yes.

After that, they're
going to Playland.

Olivia, I know you want to go to Playland,
but we'll do it some other time, okay?

But I want to go with Kye.

Well, we'll take her when we go.

But I want to go tomorrow.

Olivia, now, what did I
say to you a half hour ago?

I don't remember.

Yes, you do.

Now, you're not going to the
zoo. You're not going to Playland.

You're going to church
with the rest of us tomorrow.

Now say good-bye to Kye.

Sorry, Kye. Denise
says I can't go.

Good-bye.

It was fun living here till now.

What is this?

A little strife in
the Kendall family?

Oh. Yes, I am afraid so.

But I'm really proud of
the way I'm handling it.

She has to understand,
what I say goes.

I think I just drove
that point home.

I wouldn't count
that victory yet.

You are up against the ultimate
opponent: a determined child

who is going to spend every waking
hour between now and tomorrow

trying to figure out how
to get what she wants.

She'll come to you, and she'll
say she's too sick to go church.

Then she'll say she
has nothing to wear.

And when you don't give in,
Olivia is going to have a tantrum.

No way.

Ah-ha. Mark my words.

The doors will slam,
screaming will commence,

and tears will flow.

Forget it. Olivia's
never reacted like that.

Then I'd be ready if I were you
because she's been saving it up.

Now, Gramtee, this is the picture
of me at the high school graduation.

Mm-hmm.

Oh, Gramtee, you were a
schoolteacher, weren't you?

Yes.

I taught grades 1
through 8 in one room.

- One room?
- That's right.

Many of the children had to
walk 12 miles to and from school.

And when they went home,

they had to work their farms
until the sun went down.

It was so much harder to
get an education back then.

You know, during
slavery, in some states,

it was illegal to
teach a slave to read.

Illegal to learn how to read?

Now, your great-great-great
Aunt Lucinda grew up in slavery.

But she was determined
to learn to read.

She used to play with
the owner's daughters:

the Hawthorne girls.

They had tutors.

The Hawthorne girls
began to feel bad

because they were learning
to read and Lucinda couldn't.

So after their class,

they would sneak
her down to the creek

and teach Lucinda
everything they had learned.

Could Aunt Lucinda
have gotten in trouble?

Oh, yes.

She could have been
severely punished.

But that didn't scare her.

She was determined
to learn to read.

And after slavery,
she became a teacher.

Is that what inspired you
to become a schoolteacher?

I guess we could say
she was an inspiration.

There must be a lot
of Lucinda in me, too,

because a few months ago, I decided
I was going to be a schoolteacher.

Denise. Oh, you couldn't
have given me better news.

Oh, wait a minute, now.

Haven't you dropped out
of school once already?

Yeah.

Well, you'd better
not do that again.

She told you, Denise.

And you, Rudy,

I've heard that your
performance in school is slipping.

Now you straighten
up and fly right.

Yes, ma'am.

Uh, Gramtee, I'm
doing the best I can.

Now, remember, I
have a learning disability.

Well, you still
got to work hard.

I will, Gramtee, I promise.

Okay.

Denise.

Denise?

Yes?

Guess what.

What?

I have a stomachache.

Oh, uh, let me
feel your forehead.

Well, you don't feel warm.

Oh, I bet it's gonna
hurt Sunday, too.

That's why I can't go to church.

I think it's the zoo flu.

I think you're going to be fine.

No, I won't.

Yes, you will.

And since you're not feeling well, I
think you better go up to bed right now

and stay there until
we go to church.

Wait. I feel better.

I still can't go to church.

Why not?

Because I don't have
anything nice to wear.

You're wearing your pink and blue
dress, your white shoes, your white socks,

and I don't want to hear
another thing about it.

- But...
- Not another word.

[Cliff] Hey, hey, hey.

Don't go in there.
Gramtee's taking a nap.

And no stomping!

Denise, I'm impressed.
You held firm.

I know, but I feel terrible. I don't
want her to be angry with me.

Just make it so that they're not
angry with you for their whole life.

Then, when they get older,
they're gonna get angry with you

because you didn't get them
angry when they were young.

Then they're gonna
put you in a home.

Well, what a pleasant
way to wake up,

unless I'm looking
at an angel in heaven.

No, it's me, Olivia.

Come over here, Olivia,
and talk to your Gramtee.

You look like you're
worried about something.

Yes. Denise says you want
me to go to church with you.

Yes, I do.

But Kye invited me to go
to the zoo and Playland.

They have ponies there.

Well, I suppose it wouldn't hurt for
you to miss one Sunday in church.

But I'm not going
to decide for you.

You'll have to
decide for yourself.

Okay.

- Olivia?
- Yes?

I'm done with my nap. Would
you help me straighten up a bit?

Okay.

Here we go.

[humming]

♪ Skip, skip, skip
to the barber shop ♪

♪ I left my blanket
at the barber shop ♪

♪ And three sticks of candy ♪

♪ One for you and one for me ♪

♪ One for sister Sally ♪

What are you singing?

When I taught school, at the end of
the day, I would always sing this song,

and everybody skipped
to put the things away.

- Can I try it?
- Of course.

♪ Skip, skip to
the barber shop ♪

♪ I left my blanket
at the barber shop ♪

♪ And three pieces of candy ♪

♪ One for you, one for me ♪

♪ And one for sister Sally ♪

That was fun!

Oh, yes, it was.

- Gramtee?
- Yes, baby.

I'd like to go to
church with you.

Oh, you precious.

That was a delicious dinner.

Thank you.

Well, I think it's time
we cleared the table.

- I'll help.
- What's the rush?

This is when you go out
and bring in the birthday cake.

I don't know anything
about a birthday cake.

We have some vanilla ice cream.

I know you got me a birthday
cake, a chocolate birthday cake.

Chocolate is my favorite flavor.

No, I thought you were supposed to get this
chocolate cake over at my father's house.

Now, Heathcliff,
don't mess with me.

This is my birthday, and you're
supposed to have a cake for me.

Look, I don't want to argue
with somebody your age,

but this is my house, and I'm telling
you that there's no cake here for you.

I have strong hand
when I get ready.

Now I want my cake.

Well, if you're
gonna be that way...

Happy Birthday!

I knew you had a cake for me.

Now, before we
conclude the service today,

I have the very special
privilege of introducing to you

a very lovely person,
a very special guest.

This lady has worked tirelessly
for many years as an educator.

So please join me in wishing a
Happy Birthday to Harriet McKutchen,

otherwise known as Gramtee,

who has come all the
way from Norfolk, Virginia,

to be with us this morning.

And, Gramtee, we have a
very special tribute for you.

Welcome.

♪ Mm-mm-mm ♪

♪ [vocalizing] ♪

♪ Well ♪

♪ Mm-mm ♪

♪ Holy ♪

♪ Holy, yeah ♪

♪ Come together ♪

♪ Holy ♪

♪ People, we all ♪

♪ Have got to come together ♪

♪ 'Cause we need the strength ♪

♪ The power ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ All the... the feeling ♪

♪ Sure enough, the feeling ♪

♪ Holy, holy ♪

♪ Ah-ah-ah ♪

♪ Get together ♪

♪ One another ♪

♪ Holy ♪

♪ Holy ♪

♪ We should believe ♪

♪ Believe in one another ♪

♪ Jesus left a long time ago ♪

♪ Said He would return ♪

♪ But He left us a
book to believe in ♪

♪ He left us a good book here ♪

♪ And in it we've got a ♪

♪ We've got a... a whole ♪

♪ Whole, whole, whole ♪

♪ Whole lot to learn ♪

♪ Whole lot to learn ♪

♪ Holy ♪

♪ Oh, Lord ♪

♪ We can conquer ♪

♪ We can conquer hate forever ♪

♪ Oh, yeah, holy ♪

♪ We can, uh ♪

♪ Holy ♪

♪ We were hungry without the ♪

♪ Hungry without the
love, love, love, love ♪

♪ Love to our ♪

♪ Holy ♪

♪ Make love our salvation ♪

♪ If we come together ♪

♪ If we just love one another ♪

♪ Love, love ♪

♪ Love, love, love, love ♪

♪ Love, love, love, love ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Holy, holy ♪

♪ Holy, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Holy ♪

♪ Oh, yeah, oh ♪

♪ We can conquer ♪

♪ We will make love ♪

♪ Our salvation ♪

♪ Yes, we will, yes, we will ♪

♪ Holy, holy, holy ♪

♪ Keep on walkin'
with the Lord ♪

♪ Holy, holy ♪

♪ Walk with me, Jesus ♪

♪ Talk with me, Jesus ♪

♪ Move with me, Jesus ♪

♪ Send Your spirit ♪

♪ Send Your spirit
down and help me, Lord ♪

♪ Help me point my feet now ♪

♪ Help ♪

♪ Walkin' with the Lord,
talkin' with the Lord ♪

♪ Can't you see yourself ♪

♪ Singin' and shoutin'
with the glory? ♪

♪ Holy, holy, holy ♪

♪ Holy ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Holy ♪

Thank you.

Oh, yeah.

Thank you.

♪♪ [theme]

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Cosby Show was taped

in front of a studio audience.

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