The Cosby Show (1984–1992): Season 1, Episode 8 - Play It Again, Vanessa - full transcript
At school, Vanessa's friend takes up the clarinet, leading Vanessa to beg her parents to get her one too. After driving her siblings up the wall with her less than wonderful playing, she then wants to quit because her friend also has. Cliff reminds her she is due to perform at band recital and must see it through.
[MUSIC]
[MUSIC]
WHEW! >> HI
SWEETHEART. >> HI CLIFF.
HI SWEETHEART. >> HI CLIFF.
WELL, HOW WAS THE CHARMING
HI CLIFF. >> WELL, HOW WAS THE
CHARMING AND BEAUTIFUL MRS. HUXTABLE'S
WELL, HOW WAS THE CHARMING AND
BEAUTIFUL MRS. HUXTABLE'S DAY IN COURT?
AND BEAUTIFUL MRS.
HUXTABLE'S DAY IN COURT? >> UGH.
DAY IN COURT? >> UGH. >> OOH.
UGH. >> OOH. WELL,
YOU'LL GET 'EM NEXT TIME.
OOH. WELL, YOU'LL GET 'EM NEXT
TIME. >> OH, THAT'S WHAT YOU SAID
WELL, YOU'LL GET 'EM NEXT TIME. >>
OH, THAT'S WHAT YOU SAID THE LAST TIME.
OH, THAT'S WHAT YOU SAID THE
LAST TIME. >> WELL, THEN IN THAT CASE
THE LAST TIME. >> WELL,
THEN IN THAT CASE YOU BLEW IT.
WELL, THEN IN THAT CASE
YOU BLEW IT. >> WELL, THANK YOU.
YOU BLEW IT. >> WELL,
THANK YOU. >> HI, MOM.
WELL, THANK YOU. >> HI,
MOM. >> VANESSA, IT IS ALMOST
HI, MOM. >> VANESSA,
IT IS ALMOST DINNERTIME.
VANESSA, IT IS ALMOST
DINNERTIME. >> DAD MADE ME DO IT.
DINNERTIME. >> DAD MADE ME
DO IT. >> I SAID SHE COULD HAVE
DAD MADE ME DO IT. >> I SAID SHE
COULD HAVE A SNACK AFTER SHE PRACTICED
I SAID SHE COULD HAVE A SNACK
AFTER SHE PRACTICED THE CLARINET.
A SNACK AFTER SHE PRACTICED
THE CLARINET. >> SO DID SHE?
THE CLARINET. >> SO
DID SHE? >> DID YOU?
SO DID SHE? >> DID
YOU? >> DID I WHAT?
DID YOU? >> DID I WHAT?
PRACTICE THE CLARINET
DID I WHAT? >> PRACTICE
THE CLARINET FOR THE RECITAL?
PRACTICE THE CLARINET FOR
THE RECITAL? >> YOU DIDN'T MAKE ME.
FOR THE RECITAL? >> YOU DIDN'T
MAKE ME. >> CLIFF, WILL YOU TELL
YOU DIDN'T MAKE ME. >> CLIFF, WILL
YOU TELL YOUR DAUGHTER HOW IMPORTANT
CLIFF, WILL YOU TELL YOUR
DAUGHTER HOW IMPORTANT THIS IS?
YOUR DAUGHTER HOW IMPORTANT
THIS IS? >> WHAT, YOU PLANNING ON
THIS IS? >> WHAT, YOU PLANNING
ON LEAVING TOWN RIGHT AWAY?
WHAT, YOU PLANNING ON LEAVING TOWN
RIGHT AWAY? >> EXPLAIN TO THIS GIRL THAT
LEAVING TOWN RIGHT AWAY? >> EXPLAIN TO
THIS GIRL THAT SHE'S GOT A FEATURED SOLO
EXPLAIN TO THIS GIRL THAT SHE'S GOT
A FEATURED SOLO IN LESS THAN A WEEK.
SHE'S GOT A FEATURED SOLO IN LESS
THAN A WEEK. >> BUT DEAR, THE GIRL IS
IN LESS THAN A WEEK. >> BUT DEAR,
THE GIRL IS STANDING RIGHT THERE.
BUT DEAR, THE GIRL IS STANDING
RIGHT THERE. >> AND DON'T LET HER
STANDING RIGHT THERE. >>
AND DON'T LET HER GET OUT OF IT.
AND DON'T LET HER
GET OUT OF IT. >> VANESSA?
GET OUT OF IT. >> VANESSA?
VANESSA, I WANT YOU
VANESSA? VANESSA, I
WANT YOU TO PRACTICE.
VANESSA, I WANT YOU TO PRACTICE.
I WILL, AS SOON AS I FINISH
TO PRACTICE. >> I WILL, AS
SOON AS I FINISH MY HOMEWORK.
I WILL, AS SOON AS I FINISH MY
HOMEWORK. >> HOW MUCH DO YOU HAVE?
MY HOMEWORK. >> HOW MUCH DO
YOU HAVE? >> I HAVE A HISTORY ESSAY
HOW MUCH DO YOU HAVE? >> I HAVE A
HISTORY ESSAY ON THE HUNDRED YEARS WAR.
I HAVE A HISTORY ESSAY ON THE HUNDRED
YEARS WAR. >> OKAY, HOW LONG WILL IT TAKE?
ON THE HUNDRED YEARS WAR. >> OKAY,
HOW LONG WILL IT TAKE? >> ABOUT 15 MINUTES.
OKAY, HOW LONG WILL IT TAKE? >>
ABOUT 15 MINUTES. >> WELL, THAT'S NOT BAD,
ABOUT 15 MINUTES. >> WELL, THAT'S
NOT BAD, THAT'S SEVEN YEARS A MINUTE.
WELL, THAT'S NOT BAD, THAT'S SEVEN
YEARS A MINUTE. >> THAT'S IF I WANT A "D."
THAT'S SEVEN YEARS A MINUTE. >> THAT'S IF
I WANT A "D." >> WHAT IF YOU WANT AN "A?"
THAT'S IF I WANT A "D." >> WHAT IF
YOU WANT AN "A?" >> ABOUT AN HOUR, TOPS.
WHAT IF YOU WANT AN "A?" >>
ABOUT AN HOUR, TOPS. >> GO FOR THE "A."
ABOUT AN HOUR, TOPS. >>
GO FOR THE "A." >> HI, DADDY.
GO FOR THE "A." >> HI, DADDY.
HEY, HOW YOU DOING, PEACHES?
HI, DADDY. >> HEY, HOW
YOU DOING, PEACHES? MM-MM!
HEY, HOW YOU DOING, PEACHES?
MM-MM! >> ARE YOU MAD AT ME?
MM-MM! >> ARE YOU MAD
AT ME? >> SHOULD I BE?
ARE YOU MAD AT ME? >>
SHOULD I BE? >> THIS MORNING I GOT
SHOULD I BE? >> THIS
MORNING I GOT A KISS AND A HUG.
THIS MORNING I GOT A
KISS AND A HUG. >> OKAY.
A KISS AND A HUG.
OKAY. MM, ROOW!
OKAY. MM, ROOW!
THERE, THAT BETTER?
MM, ROOW! THERE,
THAT BETTER? >> NO.
THERE, THAT BETTER? >> NO.
WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?
NO. >> WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO
DO? >> WHEN MARY LOPEZ' FATHER
WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO? >> WHEN
MARY LOPEZ' FATHER KISSES HER, HE SAYS,
WHEN MARY LOPEZ' FATHER KISSES
HER, HE SAYS, "I LOVE YOU, MARY."
KISSES HER, HE SAYS, "I LOVE
YOU, MARY." >> I LOVE YOU, MARY.
"I LOVE YOU, MARY." >> I
LOVE YOU, MARY. >> RUDY!
I LOVE YOU, MARY. >>
RUDY! >> I LOVE YOU, RUDY!
RUDY! >> I LOVE YOU, RUDY!
AND HE SAYS IT IN SPANISH.
I LOVE YOU, RUDY! >> AND HE SAYS IT IN
SPANISH. >> MR. LOPEZ IS A TROUBLEMAKER.
AND HE SAYS IT IN SPANISH. >> MR. LOPEZ
IS A TROUBLEMAKER. >> AND YOU KNOW WHAT?
MR. LOPEZ IS A TROUBLEMAKER.
AND YOU KNOW WHAT? >> WHAT?
AND YOU KNOW WHAT? >>
WHAT? >> MARY CAN HAVE A SNACK
WHAT? >> MARY CAN HAVE
A SNACK ANY TIME SHE WANTS.
MARY CAN HAVE A SNACK ANY
TIME SHE WANTS. >> OH, REALLY?
ANY TIME SHE WANTS.
OH, REALLY? HA!
OH, REALLY? HA!
MOM'S IN THE KITCHEN.
HA! MOM'S IN THE
KITCHEN. >> WHAT?
MOM'S IN THE KITCHEN. >>
WHAT? >> MY SENTIMENTS EXACTLY.
WELL? >> VANESSA
PROMISED SHE WOULD PRACTICE.
VANESSA PROMISED SHE WOULD
PRACTICE. >> WHEN ARE WE GONNA LEARN?
PRACTICE. >> WHEN ARE WE
GONNA LEARN? FIRST IT WAS DENISE
WHEN ARE WE GONNA LEARN? FIRST IT
WAS DENISE AND HER ICE-SKATING LESSONS.
FIRST IT WAS DENISE AND HER ICE-SKATING
LESSONS. WE BUY THE ICE SKATES,
AND HER ICE-SKATING LESSONS. WE BUY THE ICE
SKATES, THE OUTFIT, SHE LASTS TWO WEEKS.
WE BUY THE ICE SKATES, THE OUTFIT, SHE
LASTS TWO WEEKS. THEN THERE'S THEODORE
THE OUTFIT, SHE LASTS TWO WEEKS. THEN
THERE'S THEODORE AND HIS KARATE LESSONS,
THEN THERE'S THEODORE AND HIS
KARATE LESSONS, A DAY AND A HALF.
AND HIS KARATE LESSONS, A DAY
AND A HALF. >> BUT WE DIDN'T GO
A DAY AND A HALF. >> BUT WE
DIDN'T GO FOR TOO MUCH THERE.
BUT WE DIDN'T GO FOR TOO MUCH
THERE. ALL WE PAID FOR WAS A WHITE
FOR TOO MUCH THERE. ALL WE PAID FOR
WAS A WHITE BATHROBE AND A COUPLE PIECES
ALL WE PAID FOR WAS A WHITE
BATHROBE AND A COUPLE PIECES OF WOOD.
BATHROBE AND A COUPLE PIECES
OF WOOD. HOW MUCH DID WE GO FOR
OF WOOD. HOW MUCH DID WE
GO FOR WITH THE CLARINET?
HOW MUCH DID WE GO FOR WITH THE
CLARINET? >> OH, WELL, YOU KNOW HOW WE
WITH THE CLARINET? >> OH, WELL, YOU KNOW
HOW WE AGREED THAT WHEN A CHILD SHOWS
OH, WELL, YOU KNOW HOW WE AGREED THAT WHEN
A CHILD SHOWS AN INTEREST IN SOMETHING,
AGREED THAT WHEN A CHILD SHOWS AN INTEREST
IN SOMETHING, IT'S OUR PARENTAL DUTY
AN INTEREST IN SOMETHING, IT'S
OUR PARENTAL DUTY TO NURTURE IT?
IT'S OUR PARENTAL DUTY TO NURTURE
IT? >> RIGHT, BUT WHAT'D IT RUN US?
TO NURTURE IT? >> RIGHT, BUT WHAT'D
IT RUN US? >> WELL, IT'S NOT LIKE WE'RE
RIGHT, BUT WHAT'D IT RUN US? >> WELL, IT'S
NOT LIKE WE'RE HARD UP FOR MONEY OR ANYTHING.
WELL, IT'S NOT LIKE WE'RE HARD UP FOR
MONEY OR ANYTHING. >> WHAT DID IT RUN US?
HARD UP FOR MONEY OR ANYTHING. >> WHAT
DID IT RUN US? >> AND, YOU KNOW, YOU'RE NOT
WHAT DID IT RUN US? >> AND, YOU
KNOW, YOU'RE NOT GONNA BELIEVE THIS, BUT IN
AND, YOU KNOW, YOU'RE NOT GONNA BELIEVE
THIS, BUT IN THE LONG RUN IT'S A LOT CHEAPER
GONNA BELIEVE THIS, BUT IN THE LONG
RUN IT'S A LOT CHEAPER THAN RENTING.
THE LONG RUN IT'S A LOT CHEAPER
THAN RENTING. >> WHAT DID IT RUN US?
THAN RENTING. >> WHAT DID
IT RUN US? >> TWO HUNDRED
WHAT DID IT RUN US? >> TWO
HUNDRED FORTY FIVE DOLLARS.
TWO HUNDRED FORTY FIVE
DOLLARS. >> TWO HUNDRED
FORTY FIVE DOLLARS. >> TWO
HUNDRED AND FORTY FIVE DOLLARS?
TWO HUNDRED AND FORTY FIVE
DOLLARS? >> BUT THAT INCLUDED THE CASE.
AND FORTY FIVE DOLLARS? >> BUT THAT INCLUDED
THE CASE. >> WELL, IT BETTER INCLUDE
BUT THAT INCLUDED THE CASE. >>
WELL, IT BETTER INCLUDE A SET OF LIPS!
[MUSIC]
HA, HA! YOU'RE NOW
DEAD MEAT. >> CHECK.
YOU'RE NOW DEAD MEAT. >>
CHECK. I'M GETTING BETTER
CHECK. I'M GETTING BETTER
AT THIS GAME, AREN'T I, DAD?
I'M GETTING BETTER AT THIS GAME, AREN'T
I, DAD? >> UH, THAT WAS A LUCKY MOVE.
AT THIS GAME, AREN'T I, DAD? >> UH, THAT WAS
A LUCKY MOVE. >> I WON THE LAST TWO MATCHES.
UH, THAT WAS A LUCKY MOVE. >> I WON THE
LAST TWO MATCHES. >> THAT'S BECAUSE I TOYED
I WON THE LAST TWO MATCHES.
THAT'S BECAUSE I TOYED WITH YOU.
THAT'S BECAUSE I TOYED WITH
YOU. >> GO AHEAD, PUT IT DOWN.
WITH YOU. >> GO AHEAD, PUT IT DOWN.
DO I TALK WHEN YOU'RE MOVING
GO AHEAD, PUT IT DOWN. >> DO I
TALK WHEN YOU'RE MOVING PIECES?
DO I TALK WHEN YOU'RE MOVING
PIECES? >> LET'S GO, TIME IS MONEY.
PIECES? >> LET'S GO, TIME IS
MONEY. >> YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE A JOB.
LET'S GO, TIME IS MONEY. >> YOU DON'T
EVEN HAVE A JOB. WHERE, WHAT MONEY?
YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE A JOB.
WHERE, WHAT MONEY? TIME IS MONEY?
WHERE, WHAT MONEY? TIME IS
MONEY? OH, TIME AND MONEY...
TIME IS MONEY? OH, TIME
AND MONEY... TIME IS MONEY ME.
OH, TIME AND MONEY... TIME IS
MONEY ME. YOU KNOW, I HAVE A JOB...
TIME IS MONEY ME. YOU KNOW, I HAVE A
JOB... NOT PLANNING ON GETTING A JOB
YOU KNOW, I HAVE A JOB... NOT PLANNING
ON GETTING A JOB AND CAN'T EVEN SPELL JOB.
NOT PLANNING ON GETTING A JOB
AND CAN'T EVEN SPELL JOB. NOW,
AND CAN'T EVEN SPELL
JOB. NOW, DEAL WITH THAT.
QUEEN CHECK. >> I KNOW
A CHECK WHEN I SEE ONE, MAN.
I KNOW A CHECK WHEN I SEE ONE,
MAN. I'M THE PERSON WHO TAUGHT YOU
WHEN I SEE ONE, MAN. I'M THE PERSON WHO
TAUGHT YOU HOW TO PLAY, YOU REMEMBER?
I'M THE PERSON WHO TAUGHT YOU HOW TO PLAY,
YOU REMEMBER? >> YEAH, YOU DID A GOOD JOB!
HOW TO PLAY, YOU REMEMBER? >> YEAH, YOU DID
A GOOD JOB! >> ARE YOU PLAYING CHESS OR ARE
YEAH, YOU DID A GOOD JOB! >> ARE YOU PLAYING
CHESS OR ARE YOU CALLING FOR THE BELLHOP?
ARE YOU PLAYING CHESS OR ARE YOU
CALLING FOR THE BELLHOP? [HORN BLARING]
YOU CALLING FOR THE BELLHOP?
[HORN BLARING] HAVE WE MOVED CLOSER
[HORN BLARING] HAVE WE
MOVED CLOSER TO THE RIVER?
HAVE WE MOVED CLOSER TO
THE RIVER? [CLARINET PLAYING]
TO THE RIVER? [CLARINET PLAYING]
YOU THINK SHE'S BLOWING
[CLARINET PLAYING] >> YOU THINK
SHE'S BLOWING TO THE RIGHT END?
YOU THINK SHE'S BLOWING TO
THE RIGHT END? [CLARINET HONKING]
TO THE RIGHT END? [CLARINET
HONKING] >> I THINK SHE JUST KILLED
[CLARINET HONKING] >> I
THINK SHE JUST KILLED A GOOSE.
I THINK SHE JUST KILLED
A GOOSE. >> SHE IS AWFUL.
A GOOSE. >> SHE IS
AWFUL. [CLARINET PLAYING]
SHE IS AWFUL. [CLARINET
PLAYING] [SQUEAKS]
I THINK WE OUGHT TO
SOUNDPROOF HER ROOM. >> AND MOVE.
TO SOUNDPROOF HER ROOM. >> AND
MOVE. [CLARINET PLAYING AND SQUEALING]
AND MOVE. [CLARINET PLAYING AND
SQUEALING] >> THAT'S IT, HALFTIME, MAN.
[CLARINET PLAYING AND SQUEALING] >> THAT'S
IT, HALFTIME, MAN. >> DAD, THERE'S NO HALFTIME
THAT'S IT, HALFTIME, MAN. >>
DAD, THERE'S NO HALFTIME IN CHESS.
DAD, THERE'S NO HALFTIME IN
CHESS. >> THE BAND IS PLAYING,
IN CHESS. >> THE BAND IS
PLAYING, SO THAT'S HALFTIME.
HEY MOM, WHEN YOU SAID YOU WANTED
TO DO SOMETHING TOGETHER, I DIDN'T THINK
YOU WANTED TO DO SOMETHING
TOGETHER, I DIDN'T THINK YOU MEANT JOGGING.
TOGETHER, I DIDN'T THINK YOU
MEANT JOGGING. IT'S SO BORING.
YOU MEANT JOGGING. IT'S SO
BORING. >> OH, COME ON, IT'LL BE GREAT,
IT'S SO BORING. >> OH, COME ON, IT'LL
BE GREAT, AND I HATE TO DO IT ALONE.
OH, COME ON, IT'LL BE GREAT, AND I HATE
TO DO IT ALONE. >> NO, I DON'T THINK SO.
AND I HATE TO DO IT ALONE. >> NO, I DON'T
THINK SO. ASK DADDY TO DO IT WITH YOU.
NO, I DON'T THINK SO. ASK DADDY
TO DO IT WITH YOU. >> ARE YOU KIDDING?
ASK DADDY TO DO IT WITH YOU. >> ARE
YOU KIDDING? THAT'S WORSE THAN DOING IT
ARE YOU KIDDING? THAT'S
WORSE THAN DOING IT ALONE.
THAT'S WORSE THAN DOING
IT ALONE. "COME ON, CLAIRE!
ALONE. "COME ON, CLAIRE!
GET THE LEAD OUT AND LIFT
"COME ON, CLAIRE! GET THE
LEAD OUT AND LIFT THOSE KNEES!
GET THE LEAD OUT AND LIFT
THOSE KNEES! SNAP IT UP, WOMAN!"
THOSE KNEES! SNAP IT UP,
WOMAN!" >> TALKING ABOUT JOGGING?
SNAP IT UP, WOMAN!" >> TALKING ABOUT
JOGGING? WHAT TIME YOU WANT TO GO?
TALKING ABOUT JOGGING? WHAT
TIME YOU WANT TO GO? >> I DON'T.
WHAT TIME YOU WANT TO GO? >>
I DON'T. >> ALL RIGHT, 7 O'CLOCK.
HO, HO! PLEASE, NO, COME
HERE! HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE.
PLEASE, NO, COME HERE! HERE, HERE,
HERE, HERE. WHERE DID YOU GET THIS FROM?
HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE. WHERE DID YOU
GET THIS FROM? >> VANESSA SAID I COULD PLAY
WHERE DID YOU GET THIS FROM? >>
VANESSA SAID I COULD PLAY WITH IT.
VANESSA SAID I COULD PLAY
WITH IT. >> THIS IS NOT A TOY,
WITH IT. >> THIS IS NOT A
TOY, THIS IS A GOOSE KILLER.
HI, DADDY.
VANESSA, DO YOU KNOW HOW
MUCH WE PAID FOR THAT?
MUCH WE PAID FOR THAT?
NO.
NO.
TWO HUNDRED
TWO HUNDRED
AND FORTY FIVE DOLLARS...
AND FORTY FIVE DOLLARS...
TWO, FOUR, FIVE.
TWO, FOUR, FIVE.
DO YOU KNOW WHAT CAN BE
DO YOU KNOW WHAT CAN BE
PURCHASED WITH $245?
PURCHASED WITH $245?
HMM?
HMM?
YOU CAN GET BRAKES
YOU CAN GET BRAKES
FOR SIX CHEVYS.
FOR SIX CHEVYS.
YOU CAN PURCHASE A TICKET TO
YOU CAN PURCHASE A TICKET TO
THE LONDON PHILHARMONIC
THE LONDON PHILHARMONIC
ORCHESTRA IN LONDON AND SIT
ORCHESTRA IN LONDON AND SIT ON THE SAME ROW
AS THE QUEEN. >> DAD, I DO APPRECIATE YOU
ON THE SAME ROW AS THE QUEEN. >> DAD,
I DO APPRECIATE YOU BUYING THIS FOR ME.
DAD, I DO APPRECIATE YOU BUYING THIS
FOR ME. >> IF YOU APPRECIATE IT, WHY IS
BUYING THIS FOR ME. >> IF YOU APPRECIATE
IT, WHY IS RUDY WALKING AROUND, DRAGGING
IF YOU APPRECIATE IT, WHY IS RUDY WALKING
AROUND, DRAGGING IT DOWN THE STEPS, TWIRLING IT
RUDY WALKING AROUND, DRAGGING IT
DOWN THE STEPS, TWIRLING IT LIKE A BATON?
IT DOWN THE STEPS, TWIRLING
IT LIKE A BATON? >> SHE IS?
LIKE A BATON? >> SHE IS? >> YES.
SHE IS? >> YES. >>
DAD, I'M TELLING YOU...
YES. >> DAD, I'M TELLING YOU...
YOU HAVE TO NAIL STUFF DOWN
DAD, I'M TELLING YOU... YOU HAVE
TO NAIL STUFF DOWN AROUND HERE.
AROUND HERE.
SOME TIME AGO, YOUNG LADY,
SOME TIME AGO, YOUNG LADY,
YOU CAME TO US AND YOU SAID YOU
YOU CAME TO US AND YOU SAID YOU
WOULD DO ANYTHING IF WE WOULD
WOULD DO ANYTHING IF WE WOULD
ALLOW YOU TO TAKE UP
ALLOW YOU TO TAKE UP
THE CLARINET.
THE CLARINET. NOW, WHAT
HAPPENED? >> DAD, I JUST DON'T LIKE IT
NOW, WHAT HAPPENED? >> DAD, I JUST
DON'T LIKE IT ANYMORE, AND NEITHER DOES
DAD, I JUST DON'T LIKE IT ANYMORE,
AND NEITHER DOES JANET MEISER.
ANYMORE, AND NEITHER DOES JANET
MEISER. SHE QUIT TWO WEEKS AGO.
SHE QUIT TWO WEEKS AGO.
SO THAT MEANS YOU HAVE
SO THAT MEANS YOU HAVE TO QUIT
TOO? >> IT'S NO FUN WITHOUT JANET.
TO QUIT TOO? >> IT'S NO FUN
WITHOUT JANET. WE'RE JUST LIKE
IT'S NO FUN WITHOUT JANET. WE'RE
JUST LIKE THE THREE MUSKETEERS,
WE'RE JUST LIKE THE THREE
MUSKETEERS, EXCEPT IT'S ONLY TWO OF US.
THE THREE MUSKETEERS, EXCEPT IT'S
ONLY TWO OF US. COULDN'T I SWITCH TO
EXCEPT IT'S ONLY TWO OF US.
COULDN'T I SWITCH TO GYMNASTICS?
COULDN'T I SWITCH
TO GYMNASTICS? >> NO.
GYMNASTICS? >> NO. >>
IF IT'S THE MONEY, I MEAN
NO. >> IF IT'S THE MONEY, I
MEAN JANET'S FATHER HAWKED HER
IF IT'S THE MONEY, I MEAN JANET'S FATHER
HAWKED HER CLARINET AND GOT $40 FOR IT.
JANET'S FATHER HAWKED HER CLARINET
AND GOT $40 FOR IT. >> FORTY DOLL...?
CLARINET AND GOT $40 FOR IT. >>
FORTY DOLL...? I PAID TWO FOR... LOOK,
FORTY DOLL...? I PAID TWO
FOR... LOOK, YOU AGREED TO
I PAID TWO FOR... LOOK, YOU
AGREED TO BE IN THAT RECITAL.
YOU AGREED TO BE IN THAT
RECITAL. THEY ARE COUNTING ON YOU.
BE IN THAT RECITAL. THEY ARE COUNTING
ON YOU. >> DAD, THEY WON'T EVEN
THEY ARE COUNTING ON YOU. >>
DAD, THEY WON'T EVEN MISS ME.
DAD, THEY WON'T EVEN
MISS ME. >> WHO'S GONNA PLAY
MISS ME. >> WHO'S GONNA
PLAY THE CLARINET SOLO?
WHO'S GONNA PLAY THE CLARINET
SOLO? >> THE TUBA CAN DO IT.
THE CLARINET SOLO? >> THE TUBA
CAN DO IT. >> NO, YOU CAN QUIT LATER,
THE TUBA CAN DO IT. >> NO, YOU
CAN QUIT LATER, WE'LL TALK ABOUT IT.
NO, YOU CAN QUIT LATER, WE'LL TALK
ABOUT IT. BUT YOU HAVE A RESPONSIBILITY
WE'LL TALK ABOUT IT. BUT YOU HAVE A
RESPONSIBILITY TO GO THROUGH WITH THAT
BUT YOU HAVE A RESPONSIBILITY
TO GO THROUGH WITH THAT RECITAL.
TO GO THROUGH WITH THAT
RECITAL. NOW, YOU ARE GOING TO DO IT.
RECITAL. NOW, YOU ARE GOING TO
DO IT. NOW, I WANT YOU TO PRACTICE,
NOW, YOU ARE GOING TO DO IT. NOW, I
WANT YOU TO PRACTICE, DO YOU UNDERSTAND?
NOW, I WANT YOU TO PRACTICE, DO
YOU UNDERSTAND? >> I UNDERSTAND.
DO YOU UNDERSTAND? >> I
UNDERSTAND. >> ALL RIGHT,
I UNDERSTAND. >> ALL
RIGHT, YOU DO UNDERSTAND ME?
ALL RIGHT, YOU DO
UNDERSTAND ME? >> YES.
YOU DO UNDERSTAND ME?
YES. >> ALL RIGHT, THEN.
YES. >> ALL RIGHT,
THEN. YOU OKAY?
ALL RIGHT, THEN.
YOU OKAY? >> I'M OKAY.
YOU OKAY? >> I'M OKAY.
OKAY, NOW IS THERE
I'M OKAY. >> OKAY, NOW IS
THERE ANYTHING YOU NEED?
OKAY, NOW IS THERE
ANYTHING YOU NEED? >> NO.
ANYTHING YOU NEED?
NO. >> YOU SURE?
NO. >> YOU SURE? >> POSITIVE.
YOU SURE? >> POSITIVE.
YOU DON'T WANT BRIGHTER
POSITIVE. >> YOU DON'T WANT
BRIGHTER LIGHTS IN THE ROOM?
YOU DON'T WANT BRIGHTER
LIGHTS IN THE ROOM? >> NO.
LIGHTS IN THE ROOM? >> NO. >>
HOW ABOUT A POT OF COFFEE?
NO. >> HOW ABOUT A
POT OF COFFEE? >> NO.
HOW ABOUT A POT OF
COFFEE? >> NO. >> ALL RIGHT NOW,
NO. >> ALL RIGHT NOW,
DON'T FORGET, YOU'VE GOT
ALL RIGHT NOW, DON'T FORGET,
YOU'VE GOT A RESPONSIBILITY... PRACTICE!
DON'T FORGET, YOU'VE GOT A
RESPONSIBILITY... PRACTICE! RIGHT?
A RESPONSIBILITY... PRACTICE!
RIGHT? >> I'LL DO MY BEST.
RIGHT? >> I'LL DO MY BEST.
THAT'S ALL I'M ASKING FOR,
I'LL DO MY BEST. >> THAT'S ALL I'M
ASKING FOR, PART OF RESPONSIBILITY.
[SQUEAKS] [PLAYING] >>
SO, HE WOULDN'T LET YOU
[PLAYING] >> SO, HE WOULDN'T
LET YOU OUT OF IT, HUH?
SO, HE WOULDN'T LET
YOU OUT OF IT, HUH? >> NO.
OUT OF IT, HUH? >>
NO. >> DID YOU GET HIS
NO. >> DID YOU GET HIS
RESPONSIBILITY SPEECH?
DID YOU GET HIS
RESPONSIBILITY SPEECH? >> YEAH.
RESPONSIBILITY SPEECH? >> YEAH.
THE LONG OR SHORT VERSION?
YEAH. >> THE LONG OR SHORT
VERSION? >> THE LONG VERSION.
THE LONG OR SHORT VERSION? >> THE
LONG VERSION. >> WITH THE POT OF COFFEE?
THE LONG VERSION. >> WITH
THE POT OF COFFEE? >> UH-HUH.
WITH THE POT OF COFFEE? >>
UH-HUH. >> SO WHAT DID YOU TELL HIM?
UH-HUH. >> SO WHAT DID YOU
TELL HIM? >> I TOLD HIM I'D DO MY BEST.
SO WHAT DID YOU TELL HIM? >> I TOLD
HIM I'D DO MY BEST. >> WAS THAT YOUR BEST?
I TOLD HIM I'D DO MY BEST. >>
WAS THAT YOUR BEST? >> YEAH.
WAS THAT YOUR BEST? >>
YEAH. >> AND THE RECITAL IS WHEN?
YEAH. >> AND THE RECITAL
IS WHEN? >> IN FIVE DAYS.
I'M IN BIG TROUBLE.
[MUSIC]
OH, I'M NOT JOGGING WITH YOU.
YES, YOU KNOW THAT DEEP DOWN
WITH YOU. >> YES, YOU KNOW THAT
DEEP DOWN INSIDE YOU WANT TO.
YES, YOU KNOW THAT DEEP DOWN INSIDE
YOU WANT TO. YOU KNOW THAT YOU'RE GOING
INSIDE YOU WANT TO. YOU KNOW THAT
YOU'RE GOING TO WAKE UP IN THE MORNING WITH
YOU KNOW THAT YOU'RE GOING TO WAKE UP IN
THE MORNING WITH AN IRRESISTIBLE URGE TO GO
TO WAKE UP IN THE MORNING WITH AN IRRESISTIBLE
URGE TO GO JOGGING WITH YOUR HUSBAND.
AN IRRESISTIBLE URGE TO GO JOGGING WITH
YOUR HUSBAND. >> JOGGING WITH ALL OF THAT?
JOGGING WITH YOUR HUSBAND. >> JOGGING
WITH ALL OF THAT? LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE GOING
JOGGING WITH ALL OF THAT? LOOKS
LIKE YOU'RE GOING ON A SPACE WALK.
LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE GOING ON A
SPACE WALK. >> CLAIRE, IN ORDER TO GO
ON A SPACE WALK. >> CLAIRE, IN ORDER
TO GO JOGGING AND DO IT PROPERLY,
CLAIRE, IN ORDER TO GO JOGGING AND DO
IT PROPERLY, YOU MUST HAVE THE NECESSARY
JOGGING AND DO IT PROPERLY, YOU
MUST HAVE THE NECESSARY EQUIPMENT.
YOU MUST HAVE THE NECESSARY
EQUIPMENT. >> CLIFF, WHY CAN'T YOU BE
EQUIPMENT. >> CLIFF, WHY CAN'T YOU
BE SATISFIED WITH A NICE PLEASANT
CLIFF, WHY CAN'T YOU BE SATISFIED
WITH A NICE PLEASANT JOG IN THE PARK?
SATISFIED WITH A NICE PLEASANT JOG IN
THE PARK? >> BECAUSE SERIOUS JOGGERS ARE
JOG IN THE PARK? >> BECAUSE SERIOUS
JOGGERS ARE NOT SATISFIED WITH A NICE
BECAUSE SERIOUS JOGGERS ARE NOT SATISFIED
WITH A NICE PLEASANT JOG IN THE PARK.
NOT SATISFIED WITH A NICE PLEASANT
JOG IN THE PARK. NOW, I HAVE THIS, WHICH
PLEASANT JOG IN THE PARK. NOW, I HAVE
THIS, WHICH MEASURES THE DISTANCE, THIS
NOW, I HAVE THIS, WHICH MEASURES THE
DISTANCE, THIS WHICH MEASURES THE TIME THAT
MEASURES THE DISTANCE, THIS WHICH MEASURES
THE TIME THAT I RAN THE DISTANCE IN, AND THIS
WHICH MEASURES THE TIME THAT I RAN THE DISTANCE
IN, AND THIS WHICH MEASURES THE HYDRO OUTPUT
I RAN THE DISTANCE IN, AND THIS WHICH
MEASURES THE HYDRO OUTPUT RATIO, YOU SEE.
WHICH MEASURES THE HYDRO OUTPUT
RATIO, YOU SEE. >> YOU MEAN SWEAT?
RATIO, YOU SEE. >> YOU
MEAN SWEAT? >> YES, OKAY.
YOU MEAN SWEAT? >> YES,
OKAY. >> CLIFF, JOGGING WITH YOU
YES, OKAY. >> CLIFF,
JOGGING WITH YOU IS NOT FUN.
CLIFF, JOGGING WITH YOU IS
NOT FUN. >> CLAIRE, LET ME TELL YOU...
IS NOT FUN. >> CLAIRE, LET ME TELL
YOU... YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT FUN?
CLAIRE, LET ME TELL YOU... YOU WANT TO
TALK ABOUT FUN? YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT
YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT FUN? YOU
WANT TO TALK ABOUT WHAT IS FUN?
YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT WHAT
IS FUN? THIS IS THE WAY I JOG.
WHAT IS FUN? THIS IS THE
WAY I JOG. SEE, I'M SERIOUS.
THIS IS THE WAY I JOG. SEE,
I'M SERIOUS. I HAVE THE PEPPER.
SEE, I'M SERIOUS. I HAVE THE
PEPPER. YOU UNDERSTAND?
I HAVE THE PEPPER. YOU
UNDERSTAND? I HAVE THE PEPPER.
YOU UNDERSTAND? I HAVE THE
PEPPER. THIS IS THE WAY I'M MOVING.
I HAVE THE PEPPER. THIS IS THE WAY I'M
MOVING. THIS IS THE WAY MY WIFE JOGS.
THIS IS THE WAY I'M MOVING. THIS IS THE
WAY MY WIFE JOGS. MUST HAVE AT LEAST THREE
THIS IS THE WAY MY WIFE JOGS. MUST
HAVE AT LEAST THREE OF THESE TUCKED HERE,
MUST HAVE AT LEAST THREE OF THESE
TUCKED HERE, AND THEN SHE BURSTS OUT!
"OH, CLIFF, CLIFF!
YOU'RE MOVING TOO FAST!"
NOW, I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU CAN BURN
OFF THERE, OTHER THAN THESE TISSUES.
BURN OFF THERE, OTHER THAN
THESE TISSUES. >> CLIFF, I DO NOT ENJOY
THESE TISSUES. >> CLIFF, I DO NOT
ENJOY JOGGING FULL SPEED CARRYING
CLIFF, I DO NOT ENJOY JOGGING FULL
SPEED CARRYING 59 POUNDS OF UNNECESSARY
JOGGING FULL SPEED CARRYING 59 POUNDS OF
UNNECESSARY EQUIPMENT WHILE YOU SCREAM,
59 POUNDS OF UNNECESSARY EQUIPMENT WHILE
YOU SCREAM, "MOVE IT, CLAIRE, MOVE IT!
EQUIPMENT WHILE YOU SCREAM, "MOVE
IT, CLAIRE, MOVE IT! NO PAIN, NO GAIN!"
"MOVE IT, CLAIRE, MOVE IT! NO PAIN,
NO GAIN!" NOW, WE ALWAYS GET IN
NO PAIN, NO GAIN!" NOW, WE ALWAYS
GET IN AN ARGUMENT AND THEN I END UP
NOW, WE ALWAYS GET IN AN ARGUMENT
AND THEN I END UP WALKING HOME ALONE AND...
AN ARGUMENT AND THEN I END UP WALKING
HOME ALONE AND... I HATE JOGGING WITH YOU.
WALKING HOME ALONE AND... I HATE
JOGGING WITH YOU. >> [LAUGHING] OKAY.
I HATE JOGGING WITH YOU. >>
[LAUGHING] OKAY. [KNOCKING]
[LAUGHING] OKAY. [KNOCKING]
AND WHOEVER IS UP AT THIS
[KNOCKING] >> AND WHOEVER IS UP
AT THIS HOUR HAD BETTER HAVE A GOOD
AND WHOEVER IS UP AT THIS HOUR
HAD BETTER HAVE A GOOD EXCUSE!
HOUR HAD BETTER HAVE A GOOD
EXCUSE! >> CAN'T SLEEP... GOOD ENOUGH?
EXCUSE! >> CAN'T SLEEP... GOOD
ENOUGH? >> WHAT'S THE MATTER, HONEY?
CAN'T SLEEP... GOOD ENOUGH? >> WHAT'S THE
MATTER, HONEY? >> DAD, I DON'T THINK I CAN BE
WHAT'S THE MATTER, HONEY? >> DAD,
I DON'T THINK I CAN BE IN THIS RECITAL.
WHY? >> [RASPY] I HAVE A SORE
THROAT. >> THE RECITAL'S IN FOUR DAYS.
[RASPY] I HAVE A SORE THROAT. >> THE RECITAL'S
IN FOUR DAYS. >> IT'S ONE OF THOSE SLOW
THE RECITAL'S IN FOUR DAYS. >> IT'S
ONE OF THOSE SLOW BUILDING SORE THROATS.
IT'S ONE OF THOSE SLOW BUILDING
SORE THROATS. >> VANESSA, IT'S AFTER
BUILDING SORE THROATS. >>
VANESSA, IT'S AFTER MIDNIGHT.
VANESSA, IT'S AFTER
MIDNIGHT. NOW, WHAT'S WRONG?
MIDNIGHT. NOW, WHAT'S
WRONG? >> MOM, I'M WORRIED.
NOW, WHAT'S WRONG? >> MOM, I'M
WORRIED. >> WHAT ARE YOU WORRIED ABOUT?
MOM, I'M WORRIED. >> WHAT ARE YOU WORRIED
ABOUT? >> YOU'VE HEARD ME PRACTICING.
WHAT ARE YOU WORRIED ABOUT? >> YOU'VE HEARD
ME PRACTICING. I'M REALLY BAD, AREN'T I?
YOU'VE HEARD ME PRACTICING. I'M REALLY
BAD, AREN'T I? >> I THINK YOU'RE DOING
I'M REALLY BAD, AREN'T I? >> I
THINK YOU'RE DOING PRETTY WELL.
I THINK YOU'RE DOING PRETTY
WELL. >> YOU'RE ONLY 11 YEARS OLD,
PRETTY WELL. >> YOU'RE ONLY 11
YEARS OLD, NOBODY'S ASKING YOU TO PLAY
YOU'RE ONLY 11 YEARS OLD, NOBODY'S
ASKING YOU TO PLAY LIKE BENNY GOODMAN.
NOBODY'S ASKING YOU TO PLAY
LIKE BENNY GOODMAN. >> WHO?
LIKE BENNY GOODMAN. >> WHO?
LOOK, YOU'RE GOING TO BE
WHO? >> LOOK, YOU'RE
GOING TO BE JUST FINE.
LOOK, YOU'RE GOING TO BE JUST
FINE. I CAN UNDERSTAND YOUR DOUBTS.
JUST FINE. I CAN UNDERSTAND YOUR
DOUBTS. I HAD THE SAME DOUBTS WHEN
I CAN UNDERSTAND YOUR DOUBTS. I HAD THE SAME
DOUBTS WHEN I WENT OUT ON MY FIRST DATE.
I HAD THE SAME DOUBTS WHEN I WENT OUT ON
MY FIRST DATE. >> DAD, THIS IS NOT THE SAME
I WENT OUT ON MY FIRST DATE. >> DAD, THIS IS
NOT THE SAME THING... YOU HAVE TO PRACTICE
DAD, THIS IS NOT THE SAME
THING... YOU HAVE TO PRACTICE TO DO THIS.
THING... YOU HAVE TO PRACTICE TO
DO THIS. >> LISTEN, I'M TELLING YOU,
TO DO THIS. >> LISTEN, I'M TELLING
YOU, MY FIRST DATE I HAD TO PRACTICE.
LISTEN, I'M TELLING YOU, MY FIRST DATE I HAD
TO PRACTICE. NOW, WHEN I WAS 13 AND A HALF
MY FIRST DATE I HAD TO PRACTICE. NOW, WHEN
I WAS 13 AND A HALF YEARS OLD, MY VOICE WAS
NOW, WHEN I WAS 13 AND A HALF YEARS OLD, MY
VOICE WAS CRACKING AND I WAS EMBARRASSED
YEARS OLD, MY VOICE WAS CRACKING
AND I WAS EMBARRASSED ABOUT IT.
CRACKING AND I WAS EMBARRASSED
ABOUT IT. AND PEOPLE WOULD SAY,
ABOUT IT. AND PEOPLE WOULD
SAY, "WHAT IS YOUR NAME?"
AND PEOPLE WOULD SAY, "WHAT IS YOUR
NAME?" AND I'D SAY, [CRACKLY] "MY NAME
"WHAT IS YOUR NAME?" AND I'D SAY,
[CRACKLY] "MY NAME IS HEATHCLIFF HUXTABLE."
AND I'D SAY, [CRACKLY] "MY NAME IS HEATHCLIFF
HUXTABLE." AND I DIDN'T WANT TO SOUND LIKE
IS HEATHCLIFF HUXTABLE." AND I DIDN'T WANT
TO SOUND LIKE THAT; I WANTED TO SOUND SMOOTH
AND I DIDN'T WANT TO SOUND LIKE THAT; I WANTED
TO SOUND SMOOTH AND MATURE, SO I PRACTICED.
THAT; I WANTED TO SOUND SMOOTH AND MATURE,
SO I PRACTICED. "WHAT IS YOUR NAME, SON?"
AND MATURE, SO I PRACTICED. "WHAT IS
YOUR NAME, SON?" "HEATHCLIFF HUXTABLE.
"WHAT IS YOUR NAME, SON?" "HEATHCLIFF
HUXTABLE. HEATHCLIFF HUXTABLE.
"HEATHCLIFF HUXTABLE. HEATHCLIFF
HUXTABLE. HEATHCLIFF HUXTABLE."
HEATHCLIFF HUXTABLE. HEATHCLIFF
HUXTABLE." AND THEN I BEGAN TO PRACTICE
HEATHCLIFF HUXTABLE." AND THEN I BEGAN TO
PRACTICE MY SMILES... I HAD THREE OF 'EM.
AND THEN I BEGAN TO PRACTICE MY SMILES... I
HAD THREE OF 'EM. I HAD A FULL SMILE.
MY SMILES... I HAD THREE OF 'EM. I HAD A
FULL SMILE. I HAD A THREE-QUARTER SMILE.
I HAD A FULL SMILE. I HAD A THREE-QUARTER
SMILE. AND THEN I HAD A QUARTER SMILE.
I HAD A THREE-QUARTER SMILE. AND THEN I HAD
A QUARTER SMILE. AND I PRACTICED ALL OF THOSE
AND THEN I HAD A QUARTER SMILE.
AND I PRACTICED ALL OF THOSE THINGS.
AND I PRACTICED ALL OF THOSE
THINGS. AND THEN THE NIGHT OF MY DATE,
THINGS. AND THEN THE NIGHT OF MY
DATE, I WALKED UP TO THE HOUSE, I WAS
AND THEN THE NIGHT OF MY DATE, I WALKED UP TO
THE HOUSE, I WAS NERVOUS, BUT I HAD PRACTICED.
I WALKED UP TO THE HOUSE, I WAS NERVOUS, BUT
I HAD PRACTICED. I RANG THE DOORBELL AND HER
NERVOUS, BUT I HAD PRACTICED. I RANG THE
DOORBELL AND HER FATHER OPENED THE DOOR,
I RANG THE DOORBELL AND HER FATHER OPENED
THE DOOR, AND HE SAID, "WHAT DO YOU WANT?"
FATHER OPENED THE DOOR, AND HE
SAID, "WHAT DO YOU WANT?" AND I SAID,
AND HE SAID, "WHAT DO YOU WANT?"
AND I SAID, [CRACKLY] "MY NAME IS,"
AND I SAID, [CRACKLY] "MY
NAME IS," AND I RAN AWAY,
[CRACKLY] "MY NAME IS," AND I RAN
AWAY, I RAN FOR ABOUT A BLOCK.
AND I RAN AWAY, I RAN FOR ABOUT A
BLOCK. AND THEN I STOPPED MYSELF
I RAN FOR ABOUT A BLOCK. AND THEN I
STOPPED MYSELF AND I SAID, "NO, NO, NO,
AND THEN I STOPPED MYSELF AND I
SAID, "NO, NO, NO, YOU PRACTICED!
AND I SAID, "NO, NO, NO, YOU
PRACTICED! GO BACK THERE!
YOU PRACTICED! GO
BACK THERE! GIVE IT TO 'EM!
GO BACK THERE! GIVE IT TO 'EM!
THREE-QUARTER, ONE-QUARTER,
GIVE IT TO 'EM! THREE-QUARTER,
ONE-QUARTER, FULL!
THREE-QUARTER, ONE-QUARTER,
FULL! AND I WENT BACK AND I RANG
FULL! AND I WENT BACK AND I
RANG THE BELL, AND HE SAID,
AND I WENT BACK AND I RANG THE
BELL, AND HE SAID, "WHO ARE YOU?"
THE BELL, AND HE SAID, "WHO
ARE YOU?" AND I SAID, "MY NAME IS
"WHO ARE YOU?" AND I SAID, "MY
NAME IS HEATHCLIFF HUXTABLE."
AND I SAID, "MY NAME IS HEATHCLIFF
HUXTABLE." NOW, DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT?
HEATHCLIFF HUXTABLE." NOW,
DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT? >> YES.
NOW, DO YOU UNDERSTAND
THAT? >> YES. >> ALL RIGHT.
YES. >> ALL RIGHT. AND
SO NOW YOU FEEL BETTER?
ALL RIGHT. AND SO NOW
YOU FEEL BETTER? >> NO.
AND SO NOW YOU FEEL
BETTER? >> NO. GOODNIGHT.
NO. GOODNIGHT. >>
GOODNIGHT, VANESSA.
[MUSIC]
HA-HUH-HUH-HA-HE-HE! [MAKING
AIRPLANE NOISES] [MAKING SHOOTING NOISES]
[MAKING AIRPLANE NOISES]
[MAKING SHOOTING NOISES] CHECK!
[MAKING SHOOTING
NOISES] CHECK! MATE!
CHECK! MATE! AHHHH!
MATE! AHHHH! THAT'S
FOUR IN A ROW FOR
AHHHH! THAT'S FOUR IN A ROW FOR
THE MAN ON THE COMEBACK TRAIL!
THAT'S FOUR IN A ROW FOR THE MAN ON THE
COMEBACK TRAIL! >> DAD, YOU'RE A BAD LOSER,
THE MAN ON THE COMEBACK TRAIL! >> DAD, YOU'RE
A BAD LOSER, BUT YOU'RE A WORSE WINNER.
DAD, YOU'RE A BAD LOSER, BUT YOU'RE A
WORSE WINNER. >> AND NOW ON MY DRIVE FOR
BUT YOU'RE A WORSE WINNER. >> AND NOW ON
MY DRIVE FOR FIVE, I AM GOING TO, MY BOY,
AND NOW ON MY DRIVE FOR FIVE, I AM GOING
TO, MY BOY, LET YOU HAVE THE FIRST MOVE.
FIVE, I AM GOING TO, MY BOY, LET YOU HAVE THE
FIRST MOVE. >> WAIT A MINUTE, DAD, HOLD ON.
LET YOU HAVE THE FIRST MOVE. >> WAIT A
MINUTE, DAD, HOLD ON. >> WHAT'S THE MATTER,
WAIT A MINUTE, DAD, HOLD ON. >> WHAT'S
THE MATTER, SOMETHING TROUBLING YOU, SON?
WHAT'S THE MATTER, SOMETHING
TROUBLING YOU, SON? >> NO.
SOMETHING TROUBLING
YOU, SON? >> NO. >> WHAT?
NO. >> WHAT? ARE
YOU LOOKING FOR RAIN?
WHAT? ARE YOU
LOOKING FOR RAIN? >> NO.
ARE YOU LOOKING FOR RAIN? >> NO.
PERHAPS A PENNY FROM HEAVEN
NO. >> PERHAPS A PENNY FROM
HEAVEN BEING PLAYED ON THE CLARINET
PERHAPS A PENNY FROM HEAVEN BEING
PLAYED ON THE CLARINET BY YOUR SISTER?
BEING PLAYED ON THE CLARINET BY
YOUR SISTER? >> HEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT
BY YOUR SISTER? >> HEY, I DON'T
KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
HEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE
TALKING ABOUT. >> WELL, FORGET IT.
YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT. >> WELL,
FORGET IT. SHE'S NOT PLAYING 'TIL
WELL, FORGET IT. SHE'S NOT
PLAYING 'TIL MR. HAMPTON GETS HERE.
SHE'S NOT PLAYING 'TIL MR. HAMPTON
GETS HERE. >> WHEN'S THAT?
MR. HAMPTON GETS HERE.
WHEN'S THAT? >> SOON.
WHEN'S THAT? >>
SOON. >> HALFTIME.
SOON. >> HALFTIME.
OH-HO-HO-HO!
HALFTIME. >> OH-HO-HO-HO!
WHY'S MR. HAMPTON COMING?
OH-HO-HO-HO! >> WHY'S MR. HAMPTON
COMING? >> MR. HAMPTON IS COMING
WHY'S MR. HAMPTON COMING? >> MR. HAMPTON
IS COMING TO GIVE YOUR SISTER SOME
MR. HAMPTON IS COMING TO GIVE YOUR
SISTER SOME INSTRUCTIONS ON THE CLARINET.
TO GIVE YOUR SISTER SOME INSTRUCTIONS
ON THE CLARINET. >> HE TOLD ME HE KNEW YOU
INSTRUCTIONS ON THE CLARINET. >> HE TOLD
ME HE KNEW YOU WHEN YOU WERE A LITTLE BOY.
HE TOLD ME HE KNEW YOU WHEN
YOU WERE A LITTLE BOY. >> THAT'S TRUE.
WHEN YOU WERE A LITTLE BOY. >> THAT'S
TRUE. MR. HAMPTON IS AN OLD FRIEND.
THAT'S TRUE. MR. HAMPTON IS AN
OLD FRIEND. HE WAS A MUSIC TEACHER
MR. HAMPTON IS AN OLD FRIEND. HE WAS
A MUSIC TEACHER WHEN I WAS IN SCHOOL.
HE WAS A MUSIC TEACHER WHEN I WAS IN
SCHOOL. >> THEY HAD MUSIC WHEN YOU WENT
WHEN I WAS IN SCHOOL. >> THEY HAD
MUSIC WHEN YOU WENT TO SCHOOL?
THEY HAD MUSIC WHEN
YOU WENT TO SCHOOL? >> SOME.
TO SCHOOL? >> SOME. >>
DID THEY HAVE POTATO CHIPS?
SOME. >> DID THEY HAVE POTATO
CHIPS? >> YES, WE HAD POTATO CHIPS.
DID THEY HAVE TV? >> NO, THEY DIDN'T
HAVE TV. >> THEN WHAT DID YOU WATCH
NO, THEY DIDN'T HAVE TV. >> THEN WHAT
DID YOU WATCH WHILE YOU WERE EATING
THEN WHAT DID YOU WATCH WHILE
YOU WERE EATING POTATO CHIPS?
WHILE YOU WERE EATING
POTATO CHIPS? >> RADIO.
POTATO CHIPS? >>
RADIO. [DOORBELL RINGS]
HI, MR. HAMPTON. >>
HI, DOC. HOW YOU BEEN?
HI, DOC. HOW YOU
BEEN? >> HI, MR. HAMPTON!
HOW YOU BEEN? >> HI,
MR. HAMPTON! >> HI, RUDY!
HI, MR. HAMPTON! >> HI,
RUDY! LONG TIME NO SEE.
HI, RUDY! LONG TIME
NO SEE. >> DO IT, DO IT!
LONG TIME NO SEE. >>
DO IT, DO IT! >> DO WHAT?
DO IT, DO IT! >> DO
WHAT? >> YOU KNOW!
DO WHAT? >> YOU KNOW!
OH, YOU ALWAYS ASK ME
YOU KNOW! >> OH, YOU
ALWAYS ASK ME TO DO THAT.
OH, YOU ALWAYS ASK
ME TO DO THAT. WATCH.
DADDY, DADDY, LOOK! HIS FACE
IS GONNA EXPLODE! >> OH, NO, NO,
HIS FACE IS GONNA EXPLODE! >>
OH, NO, NO, NOT OLD RUBBER FACE.
OH, NO, NO, NOT OLD RUBBER
FACE. >> CAN HE STAY FOR DINNER?
NOT OLD RUBBER FACE. >> CAN
HE STAY FOR DINNER? >> MM-HMM.
CAN HE STAY FOR DINNER? >>
MM-HMM. >> I WANNA WATCH HIM PUT
MM-HMM. >> I WANNA WATCH HIM
PUT A WHOLE CHICKEN IN HIS MOUTH.
I WANNA WATCH HIM PUT A WHOLE
CHICKEN IN HIS MOUTH. >> IF YOU'RE NICE,
A WHOLE CHICKEN IN HIS MOUTH. >> IF
YOU'RE NICE, I'LL DO SOMETHING FOR YOU.
IF YOU'RE NICE, I'LL DO
SOMETHING FOR YOU. WATCH NOW.
[PLAYING MOUTH HARP]
I LOVE YOU, RUDY. I LOVE
YOU, RUDY. >> I LOVE YOU TOO,
I LOVE YOU, RUDY. >> I
LOVE YOU TOO, MR. HAMPTON.
VANESSA! >> YES, DAD. >>
COME ON DOWN, PLEASE, HUN.
YES, DAD. >> COME ON DOWN,
PLEASE, HUN. >> YEAH... MR. HAMPTON,
COME ON DOWN, PLEASE, HUN. >> YEAH...
MR. HAMPTON, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
YEAH... MR. HAMPTON, WHAT ARE YOU
DOING HERE? >> GOT US A LITTLE INSURANCE
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? >> GOT US A
LITTLE INSURANCE POLICY ON THE RECITAL.
GOT US A LITTLE INSURANCE POLICY ON
THE RECITAL. >> HE'S GONNA TAKE MY PLACE?
POLICY ON THE RECITAL. >> HE'S GONNA TAKE
MY PLACE? >> NO, HE'S GOING TO GIVE YOU
HE'S GONNA TAKE MY PLACE? >> NO,
HE'S GOING TO GIVE YOU PRIVATE LESSONS.
NO, HE'S GOING TO GIVE YOU PRIVATE
LESSONS. >> COME ON, LET'S GET STARTED.
PRIVATE LESSONS. >> COME ON, LET'S
GET STARTED. >> THANK YOU, DADDY.
COME ON, LET'S GET STARTED. >>
THANK YOU, DADDY. >> IT WON'T HELP.
[BASSOON PLAYING]
BRAVO! BRAVO!
THANK YOU, LADIES
BRAVO! >> THANK YOU, LADIES
AND GENTLEMEN, THAT WAS
THANK YOU, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
THAT WAS BOBBY TUCKER ON THE BASSOON,
AND GENTLEMEN, THAT WAS BOBBY TUCKER
ON THE BASSOON, GIVING YOU HIS RENDITION
BOBBY TUCKER ON THE BASSOON, GIVING YOU
HIS RENDITION OF "FLIGHT OF THE BUMBLEBEE."
GIVING YOU HIS RENDITION OF "FLIGHT
OF THE BUMBLEBEE." >> IT WAS MORE LIKE
OF "FLIGHT OF THE BUMBLEBEE." >> IT
WAS MORE LIKE "THE WOUNDED MOTH."
IT WAS MORE LIKE "THE WOUNDED
MOTH." IN JUST A MOMENT NOW WE WILL
"THE WOUNDED MOTH." IN JUST A MOMENT
NOW WE WILL HEAR FROM OUR BEGINNER'S CLASS.
IN JUST A MOMENT NOW WE WILL HEAR
FROM OUR BEGINNER'S CLASS. >> THAT'S ME.
HEAR FROM OUR BEGINNER'S CLASS.
THAT'S ME. >> GOOD LUCK, HONEY.
THAT'S ME. >> GOOD LUCK,
HONEY. >> IT BETTER BE GOOD.
GOOD LUCK, HONEY. >> IT BETTER
BE GOOD. I GAVE UP HANGING OUT WITH
IT BETTER BE GOOD. I GAVE UP
HANGING OUT WITH MY FRIENDS TO SEE THIS.
I GAVE UP HANGING OUT WITH MY
FRIENDS TO SEE THIS. >> GO GET 'EM, KID.
MY FRIENDS TO SEE THIS. >> GO
GET 'EM, KID. HEY, WHERE YOU GOING?
GO GET 'EM, KID. HEY, WHERE YOU
GOING? >> MY KID ALREADY PLAYED.
HEY, WHERE YOU GOING? >> MY KID
ALREADY PLAYED. >> WHO, THE BUMBLEBEE?
MY KID ALREADY PLAYED. >>
WHO, THE BUMBLEBEE? NO, SIT DOWN,
WHO, THE BUMBLEBEE? NO,
SIT DOWN, MY KID'S GOING ON.
NO, SIT DOWN, MY KID'S GOING
ON. >> I'M PAYING FOUR DOLLARS
MY KID'S GOING ON. >> I'M PAYING
FOUR DOLLARS AN HOUR FOR PARKING.
I'M PAYING FOUR DOLLARS AN HOUR
FOR PARKING. >> YEAH, WELL, I DON'T CARE,
AN HOUR FOR PARKING. >> YEAH,
WELL, I DON'T CARE, MY... FOUR DOLLARS?
YEAH, WELL, I DON'T CARE,
MY... FOUR DOLLARS? I PAID SIX.
MY... FOUR DOLLARS? I PAID
SIX. COME ON, WATCH MY KID.
I PAID SIX. COME ON, WATCH
MY KID. >> AND NOW, LADIES AND
COME ON, WATCH MY KID. >> AND NOW,
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, OUR BEGINNER'S CLASS
AND NOW, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
OUR BEGINNER'S CLASS WITH THEIR MEDLEY
GENTLEMEN, OUR BEGINNER'S CLASS WITH
THEIR MEDLEY OF POPULAR SONG, WITH SOLO
WITH THEIR MEDLEY OF POPULAR SONG,
WITH SOLO BY MISS VANESSA HUXTABLE.
OF POPULAR SONG, WITH SOLO BY
MISS VANESSA HUXTABLE. >> WOO!
[SQUEAKING] >> I WANNA GO
HOME! [SQUEAKING AND PLAYING]
[SQUEAKING AND PLAYING]
[PLAYING]
[APPLAUDING]
ENCORE! ENCORE! ENCORE!
ENTER VANESSA HUXTABLE, QUEEN
OF SWING! MASTER OF THE MOUTHPIECE,
QUEEN OF SWING! MASTER OF THE
MOUTHPIECE, WIZARD OF THE WOODWINDS!
MASTER OF THE MOUTHPIECE, WIZARD OF
THE WOODWINDS! >> NO AUTOGRAPHS, PLEASE.
WIZARD OF THE WOODWINDS! >> NO AUTOGRAPHS,
PLEASE. >> SHE'S GOING TO BE IMPOSSIBLE
NO AUTOGRAPHS, PLEASE. >> SHE'S
GOING TO BE IMPOSSIBLE TO LIVE WITH.
SHE'S GOING TO BE IMPOSSIBLE TO
LIVE WITH. >> HEY, WAY TO GO, VANESSA.
TO LIVE WITH. >> HEY, WAY TO GO,
VANESSA. >> YEAH, YOU WERE REAL... GOOD.
HEY, WAY TO GO, VANESSA. >> YEAH, YOU WERE
REAL... GOOD. >> WELL, NOW THAT YOU'RE A
YEAH, YOU WERE REAL... GOOD. >> WELL, NOW
THAT YOU'RE A STAR, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?
WELL, NOW THAT YOU'RE A STAR, WHAT
ARE YOU GOING TO DO? >> RUDY, ENJOY.
STAR, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO
DO? >> RUDY, ENJOY. >> OH, BOY!
RUDY, ENJOY. >> OH,
BOY! >> TWO HUNDRED
OH, BOY! >> TWO HUNDRED
AND FORTY FIVE DOLLARS.
TWO HUNDRED AND FORTY
FIVE DOLLARS. >> VANESSA?
AND FORTY FIVE DOLLARS. >>
VANESSA? >> MOM, THE RECITAL IS OVER.
VANESSA? >> MOM, THE RECITAL
IS OVER. >> YES HONEY, BUT YOU DID
MOM, THE RECITAL IS OVER. >> YES
HONEY, BUT YOU DID SO WELL THIS EVENING.
YES HONEY, BUT YOU DID SO WELL
THIS EVENING. DON'T YOU WANT TO AT LEAST
SO WELL THIS EVENING. DON'T
YOU WANT TO AT LEAST RECONSIDER?
DON'T YOU WANT TO AT LEAST
RECONSIDER? >> NO, NOT REALLY.
RECONSIDER? >> NO, NOT
REALLY. >> GYMNASTICS?
NO, NOT REALLY. >>
GYMNASTICS? >> JANET MEISER HATED
GYMNASTICS? >> JANET
MEISER HATED GYMNASTICS.
JANET MEISER HATED
GYMNASTICS. >> REALLY?
GYMNASTICS. >> REALLY?
WHAT'S SHE DOING NOW?
REALLY? >> WHAT'S SHE
DOING NOW? >> HORSEBACK RIDING.
WHAT'S SHE DOING NOW? >>
HORSEBACK RIDING. >> HORSEBACK RIDING?
HORSEBACK RIDING. >>
HORSEBACK RIDING? WE'RE RENTING.
[MUSIC]
"THE COSBY SHOW" IS VIDEOTAPED
IN FRONT OF A LIVE STUDIO AUDIENCE.
[MUSIC]
WHEW! >> HI
SWEETHEART. >> HI CLIFF.
HI SWEETHEART. >> HI CLIFF.
WELL, HOW WAS THE CHARMING
HI CLIFF. >> WELL, HOW WAS THE
CHARMING AND BEAUTIFUL MRS. HUXTABLE'S
WELL, HOW WAS THE CHARMING AND
BEAUTIFUL MRS. HUXTABLE'S DAY IN COURT?
AND BEAUTIFUL MRS.
HUXTABLE'S DAY IN COURT? >> UGH.
DAY IN COURT? >> UGH. >> OOH.
UGH. >> OOH. WELL,
YOU'LL GET 'EM NEXT TIME.
OOH. WELL, YOU'LL GET 'EM NEXT
TIME. >> OH, THAT'S WHAT YOU SAID
WELL, YOU'LL GET 'EM NEXT TIME. >>
OH, THAT'S WHAT YOU SAID THE LAST TIME.
OH, THAT'S WHAT YOU SAID THE
LAST TIME. >> WELL, THEN IN THAT CASE
THE LAST TIME. >> WELL,
THEN IN THAT CASE YOU BLEW IT.
WELL, THEN IN THAT CASE
YOU BLEW IT. >> WELL, THANK YOU.
YOU BLEW IT. >> WELL,
THANK YOU. >> HI, MOM.
WELL, THANK YOU. >> HI,
MOM. >> VANESSA, IT IS ALMOST
HI, MOM. >> VANESSA,
IT IS ALMOST DINNERTIME.
VANESSA, IT IS ALMOST
DINNERTIME. >> DAD MADE ME DO IT.
DINNERTIME. >> DAD MADE ME
DO IT. >> I SAID SHE COULD HAVE
DAD MADE ME DO IT. >> I SAID SHE
COULD HAVE A SNACK AFTER SHE PRACTICED
I SAID SHE COULD HAVE A SNACK
AFTER SHE PRACTICED THE CLARINET.
A SNACK AFTER SHE PRACTICED
THE CLARINET. >> SO DID SHE?
THE CLARINET. >> SO
DID SHE? >> DID YOU?
SO DID SHE? >> DID
YOU? >> DID I WHAT?
DID YOU? >> DID I WHAT?
PRACTICE THE CLARINET
DID I WHAT? >> PRACTICE
THE CLARINET FOR THE RECITAL?
PRACTICE THE CLARINET FOR
THE RECITAL? >> YOU DIDN'T MAKE ME.
FOR THE RECITAL? >> YOU DIDN'T
MAKE ME. >> CLIFF, WILL YOU TELL
YOU DIDN'T MAKE ME. >> CLIFF, WILL
YOU TELL YOUR DAUGHTER HOW IMPORTANT
CLIFF, WILL YOU TELL YOUR
DAUGHTER HOW IMPORTANT THIS IS?
YOUR DAUGHTER HOW IMPORTANT
THIS IS? >> WHAT, YOU PLANNING ON
THIS IS? >> WHAT, YOU PLANNING
ON LEAVING TOWN RIGHT AWAY?
WHAT, YOU PLANNING ON LEAVING TOWN
RIGHT AWAY? >> EXPLAIN TO THIS GIRL THAT
LEAVING TOWN RIGHT AWAY? >> EXPLAIN TO
THIS GIRL THAT SHE'S GOT A FEATURED SOLO
EXPLAIN TO THIS GIRL THAT SHE'S GOT
A FEATURED SOLO IN LESS THAN A WEEK.
SHE'S GOT A FEATURED SOLO IN LESS
THAN A WEEK. >> BUT DEAR, THE GIRL IS
IN LESS THAN A WEEK. >> BUT DEAR,
THE GIRL IS STANDING RIGHT THERE.
BUT DEAR, THE GIRL IS STANDING
RIGHT THERE. >> AND DON'T LET HER
STANDING RIGHT THERE. >>
AND DON'T LET HER GET OUT OF IT.
AND DON'T LET HER
GET OUT OF IT. >> VANESSA?
GET OUT OF IT. >> VANESSA?
VANESSA, I WANT YOU
VANESSA? VANESSA, I
WANT YOU TO PRACTICE.
VANESSA, I WANT YOU TO PRACTICE.
I WILL, AS SOON AS I FINISH
TO PRACTICE. >> I WILL, AS
SOON AS I FINISH MY HOMEWORK.
I WILL, AS SOON AS I FINISH MY
HOMEWORK. >> HOW MUCH DO YOU HAVE?
MY HOMEWORK. >> HOW MUCH DO
YOU HAVE? >> I HAVE A HISTORY ESSAY
HOW MUCH DO YOU HAVE? >> I HAVE A
HISTORY ESSAY ON THE HUNDRED YEARS WAR.
I HAVE A HISTORY ESSAY ON THE HUNDRED
YEARS WAR. >> OKAY, HOW LONG WILL IT TAKE?
ON THE HUNDRED YEARS WAR. >> OKAY,
HOW LONG WILL IT TAKE? >> ABOUT 15 MINUTES.
OKAY, HOW LONG WILL IT TAKE? >>
ABOUT 15 MINUTES. >> WELL, THAT'S NOT BAD,
ABOUT 15 MINUTES. >> WELL, THAT'S
NOT BAD, THAT'S SEVEN YEARS A MINUTE.
WELL, THAT'S NOT BAD, THAT'S SEVEN
YEARS A MINUTE. >> THAT'S IF I WANT A "D."
THAT'S SEVEN YEARS A MINUTE. >> THAT'S IF
I WANT A "D." >> WHAT IF YOU WANT AN "A?"
THAT'S IF I WANT A "D." >> WHAT IF
YOU WANT AN "A?" >> ABOUT AN HOUR, TOPS.
WHAT IF YOU WANT AN "A?" >>
ABOUT AN HOUR, TOPS. >> GO FOR THE "A."
ABOUT AN HOUR, TOPS. >>
GO FOR THE "A." >> HI, DADDY.
GO FOR THE "A." >> HI, DADDY.
HEY, HOW YOU DOING, PEACHES?
HI, DADDY. >> HEY, HOW
YOU DOING, PEACHES? MM-MM!
HEY, HOW YOU DOING, PEACHES?
MM-MM! >> ARE YOU MAD AT ME?
MM-MM! >> ARE YOU MAD
AT ME? >> SHOULD I BE?
ARE YOU MAD AT ME? >>
SHOULD I BE? >> THIS MORNING I GOT
SHOULD I BE? >> THIS
MORNING I GOT A KISS AND A HUG.
THIS MORNING I GOT A
KISS AND A HUG. >> OKAY.
A KISS AND A HUG.
OKAY. MM, ROOW!
OKAY. MM, ROOW!
THERE, THAT BETTER?
MM, ROOW! THERE,
THAT BETTER? >> NO.
THERE, THAT BETTER? >> NO.
WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?
NO. >> WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO
DO? >> WHEN MARY LOPEZ' FATHER
WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO? >> WHEN
MARY LOPEZ' FATHER KISSES HER, HE SAYS,
WHEN MARY LOPEZ' FATHER KISSES
HER, HE SAYS, "I LOVE YOU, MARY."
KISSES HER, HE SAYS, "I LOVE
YOU, MARY." >> I LOVE YOU, MARY.
"I LOVE YOU, MARY." >> I
LOVE YOU, MARY. >> RUDY!
I LOVE YOU, MARY. >>
RUDY! >> I LOVE YOU, RUDY!
RUDY! >> I LOVE YOU, RUDY!
AND HE SAYS IT IN SPANISH.
I LOVE YOU, RUDY! >> AND HE SAYS IT IN
SPANISH. >> MR. LOPEZ IS A TROUBLEMAKER.
AND HE SAYS IT IN SPANISH. >> MR. LOPEZ
IS A TROUBLEMAKER. >> AND YOU KNOW WHAT?
MR. LOPEZ IS A TROUBLEMAKER.
AND YOU KNOW WHAT? >> WHAT?
AND YOU KNOW WHAT? >>
WHAT? >> MARY CAN HAVE A SNACK
WHAT? >> MARY CAN HAVE
A SNACK ANY TIME SHE WANTS.
MARY CAN HAVE A SNACK ANY
TIME SHE WANTS. >> OH, REALLY?
ANY TIME SHE WANTS.
OH, REALLY? HA!
OH, REALLY? HA!
MOM'S IN THE KITCHEN.
HA! MOM'S IN THE
KITCHEN. >> WHAT?
MOM'S IN THE KITCHEN. >>
WHAT? >> MY SENTIMENTS EXACTLY.
WELL? >> VANESSA
PROMISED SHE WOULD PRACTICE.
VANESSA PROMISED SHE WOULD
PRACTICE. >> WHEN ARE WE GONNA LEARN?
PRACTICE. >> WHEN ARE WE
GONNA LEARN? FIRST IT WAS DENISE
WHEN ARE WE GONNA LEARN? FIRST IT
WAS DENISE AND HER ICE-SKATING LESSONS.
FIRST IT WAS DENISE AND HER ICE-SKATING
LESSONS. WE BUY THE ICE SKATES,
AND HER ICE-SKATING LESSONS. WE BUY THE ICE
SKATES, THE OUTFIT, SHE LASTS TWO WEEKS.
WE BUY THE ICE SKATES, THE OUTFIT, SHE
LASTS TWO WEEKS. THEN THERE'S THEODORE
THE OUTFIT, SHE LASTS TWO WEEKS. THEN
THERE'S THEODORE AND HIS KARATE LESSONS,
THEN THERE'S THEODORE AND HIS
KARATE LESSONS, A DAY AND A HALF.
AND HIS KARATE LESSONS, A DAY
AND A HALF. >> BUT WE DIDN'T GO
A DAY AND A HALF. >> BUT WE
DIDN'T GO FOR TOO MUCH THERE.
BUT WE DIDN'T GO FOR TOO MUCH
THERE. ALL WE PAID FOR WAS A WHITE
FOR TOO MUCH THERE. ALL WE PAID FOR
WAS A WHITE BATHROBE AND A COUPLE PIECES
ALL WE PAID FOR WAS A WHITE
BATHROBE AND A COUPLE PIECES OF WOOD.
BATHROBE AND A COUPLE PIECES
OF WOOD. HOW MUCH DID WE GO FOR
OF WOOD. HOW MUCH DID WE
GO FOR WITH THE CLARINET?
HOW MUCH DID WE GO FOR WITH THE
CLARINET? >> OH, WELL, YOU KNOW HOW WE
WITH THE CLARINET? >> OH, WELL, YOU KNOW
HOW WE AGREED THAT WHEN A CHILD SHOWS
OH, WELL, YOU KNOW HOW WE AGREED THAT WHEN
A CHILD SHOWS AN INTEREST IN SOMETHING,
AGREED THAT WHEN A CHILD SHOWS AN INTEREST
IN SOMETHING, IT'S OUR PARENTAL DUTY
AN INTEREST IN SOMETHING, IT'S
OUR PARENTAL DUTY TO NURTURE IT?
IT'S OUR PARENTAL DUTY TO NURTURE
IT? >> RIGHT, BUT WHAT'D IT RUN US?
TO NURTURE IT? >> RIGHT, BUT WHAT'D
IT RUN US? >> WELL, IT'S NOT LIKE WE'RE
RIGHT, BUT WHAT'D IT RUN US? >> WELL, IT'S
NOT LIKE WE'RE HARD UP FOR MONEY OR ANYTHING.
WELL, IT'S NOT LIKE WE'RE HARD UP FOR
MONEY OR ANYTHING. >> WHAT DID IT RUN US?
HARD UP FOR MONEY OR ANYTHING. >> WHAT
DID IT RUN US? >> AND, YOU KNOW, YOU'RE NOT
WHAT DID IT RUN US? >> AND, YOU
KNOW, YOU'RE NOT GONNA BELIEVE THIS, BUT IN
AND, YOU KNOW, YOU'RE NOT GONNA BELIEVE
THIS, BUT IN THE LONG RUN IT'S A LOT CHEAPER
GONNA BELIEVE THIS, BUT IN THE LONG
RUN IT'S A LOT CHEAPER THAN RENTING.
THE LONG RUN IT'S A LOT CHEAPER
THAN RENTING. >> WHAT DID IT RUN US?
THAN RENTING. >> WHAT DID
IT RUN US? >> TWO HUNDRED
WHAT DID IT RUN US? >> TWO
HUNDRED FORTY FIVE DOLLARS.
TWO HUNDRED FORTY FIVE
DOLLARS. >> TWO HUNDRED
FORTY FIVE DOLLARS. >> TWO
HUNDRED AND FORTY FIVE DOLLARS?
TWO HUNDRED AND FORTY FIVE
DOLLARS? >> BUT THAT INCLUDED THE CASE.
AND FORTY FIVE DOLLARS? >> BUT THAT INCLUDED
THE CASE. >> WELL, IT BETTER INCLUDE
BUT THAT INCLUDED THE CASE. >>
WELL, IT BETTER INCLUDE A SET OF LIPS!
[MUSIC]
HA, HA! YOU'RE NOW
DEAD MEAT. >> CHECK.
YOU'RE NOW DEAD MEAT. >>
CHECK. I'M GETTING BETTER
CHECK. I'M GETTING BETTER
AT THIS GAME, AREN'T I, DAD?
I'M GETTING BETTER AT THIS GAME, AREN'T
I, DAD? >> UH, THAT WAS A LUCKY MOVE.
AT THIS GAME, AREN'T I, DAD? >> UH, THAT WAS
A LUCKY MOVE. >> I WON THE LAST TWO MATCHES.
UH, THAT WAS A LUCKY MOVE. >> I WON THE
LAST TWO MATCHES. >> THAT'S BECAUSE I TOYED
I WON THE LAST TWO MATCHES.
THAT'S BECAUSE I TOYED WITH YOU.
THAT'S BECAUSE I TOYED WITH
YOU. >> GO AHEAD, PUT IT DOWN.
WITH YOU. >> GO AHEAD, PUT IT DOWN.
DO I TALK WHEN YOU'RE MOVING
GO AHEAD, PUT IT DOWN. >> DO I
TALK WHEN YOU'RE MOVING PIECES?
DO I TALK WHEN YOU'RE MOVING
PIECES? >> LET'S GO, TIME IS MONEY.
PIECES? >> LET'S GO, TIME IS
MONEY. >> YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE A JOB.
LET'S GO, TIME IS MONEY. >> YOU DON'T
EVEN HAVE A JOB. WHERE, WHAT MONEY?
YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE A JOB.
WHERE, WHAT MONEY? TIME IS MONEY?
WHERE, WHAT MONEY? TIME IS
MONEY? OH, TIME AND MONEY...
TIME IS MONEY? OH, TIME
AND MONEY... TIME IS MONEY ME.
OH, TIME AND MONEY... TIME IS
MONEY ME. YOU KNOW, I HAVE A JOB...
TIME IS MONEY ME. YOU KNOW, I HAVE A
JOB... NOT PLANNING ON GETTING A JOB
YOU KNOW, I HAVE A JOB... NOT PLANNING
ON GETTING A JOB AND CAN'T EVEN SPELL JOB.
NOT PLANNING ON GETTING A JOB
AND CAN'T EVEN SPELL JOB. NOW,
AND CAN'T EVEN SPELL
JOB. NOW, DEAL WITH THAT.
QUEEN CHECK. >> I KNOW
A CHECK WHEN I SEE ONE, MAN.
I KNOW A CHECK WHEN I SEE ONE,
MAN. I'M THE PERSON WHO TAUGHT YOU
WHEN I SEE ONE, MAN. I'M THE PERSON WHO
TAUGHT YOU HOW TO PLAY, YOU REMEMBER?
I'M THE PERSON WHO TAUGHT YOU HOW TO PLAY,
YOU REMEMBER? >> YEAH, YOU DID A GOOD JOB!
HOW TO PLAY, YOU REMEMBER? >> YEAH, YOU DID
A GOOD JOB! >> ARE YOU PLAYING CHESS OR ARE
YEAH, YOU DID A GOOD JOB! >> ARE YOU PLAYING
CHESS OR ARE YOU CALLING FOR THE BELLHOP?
ARE YOU PLAYING CHESS OR ARE YOU
CALLING FOR THE BELLHOP? [HORN BLARING]
YOU CALLING FOR THE BELLHOP?
[HORN BLARING] HAVE WE MOVED CLOSER
[HORN BLARING] HAVE WE
MOVED CLOSER TO THE RIVER?
HAVE WE MOVED CLOSER TO
THE RIVER? [CLARINET PLAYING]
TO THE RIVER? [CLARINET PLAYING]
YOU THINK SHE'S BLOWING
[CLARINET PLAYING] >> YOU THINK
SHE'S BLOWING TO THE RIGHT END?
YOU THINK SHE'S BLOWING TO
THE RIGHT END? [CLARINET HONKING]
TO THE RIGHT END? [CLARINET
HONKING] >> I THINK SHE JUST KILLED
[CLARINET HONKING] >> I
THINK SHE JUST KILLED A GOOSE.
I THINK SHE JUST KILLED
A GOOSE. >> SHE IS AWFUL.
A GOOSE. >> SHE IS
AWFUL. [CLARINET PLAYING]
SHE IS AWFUL. [CLARINET
PLAYING] [SQUEAKS]
I THINK WE OUGHT TO
SOUNDPROOF HER ROOM. >> AND MOVE.
TO SOUNDPROOF HER ROOM. >> AND
MOVE. [CLARINET PLAYING AND SQUEALING]
AND MOVE. [CLARINET PLAYING AND
SQUEALING] >> THAT'S IT, HALFTIME, MAN.
[CLARINET PLAYING AND SQUEALING] >> THAT'S
IT, HALFTIME, MAN. >> DAD, THERE'S NO HALFTIME
THAT'S IT, HALFTIME, MAN. >>
DAD, THERE'S NO HALFTIME IN CHESS.
DAD, THERE'S NO HALFTIME IN
CHESS. >> THE BAND IS PLAYING,
IN CHESS. >> THE BAND IS
PLAYING, SO THAT'S HALFTIME.
HEY MOM, WHEN YOU SAID YOU WANTED
TO DO SOMETHING TOGETHER, I DIDN'T THINK
YOU WANTED TO DO SOMETHING
TOGETHER, I DIDN'T THINK YOU MEANT JOGGING.
TOGETHER, I DIDN'T THINK YOU
MEANT JOGGING. IT'S SO BORING.
YOU MEANT JOGGING. IT'S SO
BORING. >> OH, COME ON, IT'LL BE GREAT,
IT'S SO BORING. >> OH, COME ON, IT'LL
BE GREAT, AND I HATE TO DO IT ALONE.
OH, COME ON, IT'LL BE GREAT, AND I HATE
TO DO IT ALONE. >> NO, I DON'T THINK SO.
AND I HATE TO DO IT ALONE. >> NO, I DON'T
THINK SO. ASK DADDY TO DO IT WITH YOU.
NO, I DON'T THINK SO. ASK DADDY
TO DO IT WITH YOU. >> ARE YOU KIDDING?
ASK DADDY TO DO IT WITH YOU. >> ARE
YOU KIDDING? THAT'S WORSE THAN DOING IT
ARE YOU KIDDING? THAT'S
WORSE THAN DOING IT ALONE.
THAT'S WORSE THAN DOING
IT ALONE. "COME ON, CLAIRE!
ALONE. "COME ON, CLAIRE!
GET THE LEAD OUT AND LIFT
"COME ON, CLAIRE! GET THE
LEAD OUT AND LIFT THOSE KNEES!
GET THE LEAD OUT AND LIFT
THOSE KNEES! SNAP IT UP, WOMAN!"
THOSE KNEES! SNAP IT UP,
WOMAN!" >> TALKING ABOUT JOGGING?
SNAP IT UP, WOMAN!" >> TALKING ABOUT
JOGGING? WHAT TIME YOU WANT TO GO?
TALKING ABOUT JOGGING? WHAT
TIME YOU WANT TO GO? >> I DON'T.
WHAT TIME YOU WANT TO GO? >>
I DON'T. >> ALL RIGHT, 7 O'CLOCK.
HO, HO! PLEASE, NO, COME
HERE! HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE.
PLEASE, NO, COME HERE! HERE, HERE,
HERE, HERE. WHERE DID YOU GET THIS FROM?
HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE. WHERE DID YOU
GET THIS FROM? >> VANESSA SAID I COULD PLAY
WHERE DID YOU GET THIS FROM? >>
VANESSA SAID I COULD PLAY WITH IT.
VANESSA SAID I COULD PLAY
WITH IT. >> THIS IS NOT A TOY,
WITH IT. >> THIS IS NOT A
TOY, THIS IS A GOOSE KILLER.
HI, DADDY.
VANESSA, DO YOU KNOW HOW
MUCH WE PAID FOR THAT?
MUCH WE PAID FOR THAT?
NO.
NO.
TWO HUNDRED
TWO HUNDRED
AND FORTY FIVE DOLLARS...
AND FORTY FIVE DOLLARS...
TWO, FOUR, FIVE.
TWO, FOUR, FIVE.
DO YOU KNOW WHAT CAN BE
DO YOU KNOW WHAT CAN BE
PURCHASED WITH $245?
PURCHASED WITH $245?
HMM?
HMM?
YOU CAN GET BRAKES
YOU CAN GET BRAKES
FOR SIX CHEVYS.
FOR SIX CHEVYS.
YOU CAN PURCHASE A TICKET TO
YOU CAN PURCHASE A TICKET TO
THE LONDON PHILHARMONIC
THE LONDON PHILHARMONIC
ORCHESTRA IN LONDON AND SIT
ORCHESTRA IN LONDON AND SIT ON THE SAME ROW
AS THE QUEEN. >> DAD, I DO APPRECIATE YOU
ON THE SAME ROW AS THE QUEEN. >> DAD,
I DO APPRECIATE YOU BUYING THIS FOR ME.
DAD, I DO APPRECIATE YOU BUYING THIS
FOR ME. >> IF YOU APPRECIATE IT, WHY IS
BUYING THIS FOR ME. >> IF YOU APPRECIATE
IT, WHY IS RUDY WALKING AROUND, DRAGGING
IF YOU APPRECIATE IT, WHY IS RUDY WALKING
AROUND, DRAGGING IT DOWN THE STEPS, TWIRLING IT
RUDY WALKING AROUND, DRAGGING IT
DOWN THE STEPS, TWIRLING IT LIKE A BATON?
IT DOWN THE STEPS, TWIRLING
IT LIKE A BATON? >> SHE IS?
LIKE A BATON? >> SHE IS? >> YES.
SHE IS? >> YES. >>
DAD, I'M TELLING YOU...
YES. >> DAD, I'M TELLING YOU...
YOU HAVE TO NAIL STUFF DOWN
DAD, I'M TELLING YOU... YOU HAVE
TO NAIL STUFF DOWN AROUND HERE.
AROUND HERE.
SOME TIME AGO, YOUNG LADY,
SOME TIME AGO, YOUNG LADY,
YOU CAME TO US AND YOU SAID YOU
YOU CAME TO US AND YOU SAID YOU
WOULD DO ANYTHING IF WE WOULD
WOULD DO ANYTHING IF WE WOULD
ALLOW YOU TO TAKE UP
ALLOW YOU TO TAKE UP
THE CLARINET.
THE CLARINET. NOW, WHAT
HAPPENED? >> DAD, I JUST DON'T LIKE IT
NOW, WHAT HAPPENED? >> DAD, I JUST
DON'T LIKE IT ANYMORE, AND NEITHER DOES
DAD, I JUST DON'T LIKE IT ANYMORE,
AND NEITHER DOES JANET MEISER.
ANYMORE, AND NEITHER DOES JANET
MEISER. SHE QUIT TWO WEEKS AGO.
SHE QUIT TWO WEEKS AGO.
SO THAT MEANS YOU HAVE
SO THAT MEANS YOU HAVE TO QUIT
TOO? >> IT'S NO FUN WITHOUT JANET.
TO QUIT TOO? >> IT'S NO FUN
WITHOUT JANET. WE'RE JUST LIKE
IT'S NO FUN WITHOUT JANET. WE'RE
JUST LIKE THE THREE MUSKETEERS,
WE'RE JUST LIKE THE THREE
MUSKETEERS, EXCEPT IT'S ONLY TWO OF US.
THE THREE MUSKETEERS, EXCEPT IT'S
ONLY TWO OF US. COULDN'T I SWITCH TO
EXCEPT IT'S ONLY TWO OF US.
COULDN'T I SWITCH TO GYMNASTICS?
COULDN'T I SWITCH
TO GYMNASTICS? >> NO.
GYMNASTICS? >> NO. >>
IF IT'S THE MONEY, I MEAN
NO. >> IF IT'S THE MONEY, I
MEAN JANET'S FATHER HAWKED HER
IF IT'S THE MONEY, I MEAN JANET'S FATHER
HAWKED HER CLARINET AND GOT $40 FOR IT.
JANET'S FATHER HAWKED HER CLARINET
AND GOT $40 FOR IT. >> FORTY DOLL...?
CLARINET AND GOT $40 FOR IT. >>
FORTY DOLL...? I PAID TWO FOR... LOOK,
FORTY DOLL...? I PAID TWO
FOR... LOOK, YOU AGREED TO
I PAID TWO FOR... LOOK, YOU
AGREED TO BE IN THAT RECITAL.
YOU AGREED TO BE IN THAT
RECITAL. THEY ARE COUNTING ON YOU.
BE IN THAT RECITAL. THEY ARE COUNTING
ON YOU. >> DAD, THEY WON'T EVEN
THEY ARE COUNTING ON YOU. >>
DAD, THEY WON'T EVEN MISS ME.
DAD, THEY WON'T EVEN
MISS ME. >> WHO'S GONNA PLAY
MISS ME. >> WHO'S GONNA
PLAY THE CLARINET SOLO?
WHO'S GONNA PLAY THE CLARINET
SOLO? >> THE TUBA CAN DO IT.
THE CLARINET SOLO? >> THE TUBA
CAN DO IT. >> NO, YOU CAN QUIT LATER,
THE TUBA CAN DO IT. >> NO, YOU
CAN QUIT LATER, WE'LL TALK ABOUT IT.
NO, YOU CAN QUIT LATER, WE'LL TALK
ABOUT IT. BUT YOU HAVE A RESPONSIBILITY
WE'LL TALK ABOUT IT. BUT YOU HAVE A
RESPONSIBILITY TO GO THROUGH WITH THAT
BUT YOU HAVE A RESPONSIBILITY
TO GO THROUGH WITH THAT RECITAL.
TO GO THROUGH WITH THAT
RECITAL. NOW, YOU ARE GOING TO DO IT.
RECITAL. NOW, YOU ARE GOING TO
DO IT. NOW, I WANT YOU TO PRACTICE,
NOW, YOU ARE GOING TO DO IT. NOW, I
WANT YOU TO PRACTICE, DO YOU UNDERSTAND?
NOW, I WANT YOU TO PRACTICE, DO
YOU UNDERSTAND? >> I UNDERSTAND.
DO YOU UNDERSTAND? >> I
UNDERSTAND. >> ALL RIGHT,
I UNDERSTAND. >> ALL
RIGHT, YOU DO UNDERSTAND ME?
ALL RIGHT, YOU DO
UNDERSTAND ME? >> YES.
YOU DO UNDERSTAND ME?
YES. >> ALL RIGHT, THEN.
YES. >> ALL RIGHT,
THEN. YOU OKAY?
ALL RIGHT, THEN.
YOU OKAY? >> I'M OKAY.
YOU OKAY? >> I'M OKAY.
OKAY, NOW IS THERE
I'M OKAY. >> OKAY, NOW IS
THERE ANYTHING YOU NEED?
OKAY, NOW IS THERE
ANYTHING YOU NEED? >> NO.
ANYTHING YOU NEED?
NO. >> YOU SURE?
NO. >> YOU SURE? >> POSITIVE.
YOU SURE? >> POSITIVE.
YOU DON'T WANT BRIGHTER
POSITIVE. >> YOU DON'T WANT
BRIGHTER LIGHTS IN THE ROOM?
YOU DON'T WANT BRIGHTER
LIGHTS IN THE ROOM? >> NO.
LIGHTS IN THE ROOM? >> NO. >>
HOW ABOUT A POT OF COFFEE?
NO. >> HOW ABOUT A
POT OF COFFEE? >> NO.
HOW ABOUT A POT OF
COFFEE? >> NO. >> ALL RIGHT NOW,
NO. >> ALL RIGHT NOW,
DON'T FORGET, YOU'VE GOT
ALL RIGHT NOW, DON'T FORGET,
YOU'VE GOT A RESPONSIBILITY... PRACTICE!
DON'T FORGET, YOU'VE GOT A
RESPONSIBILITY... PRACTICE! RIGHT?
A RESPONSIBILITY... PRACTICE!
RIGHT? >> I'LL DO MY BEST.
RIGHT? >> I'LL DO MY BEST.
THAT'S ALL I'M ASKING FOR,
I'LL DO MY BEST. >> THAT'S ALL I'M
ASKING FOR, PART OF RESPONSIBILITY.
[SQUEAKS] [PLAYING] >>
SO, HE WOULDN'T LET YOU
[PLAYING] >> SO, HE WOULDN'T
LET YOU OUT OF IT, HUH?
SO, HE WOULDN'T LET
YOU OUT OF IT, HUH? >> NO.
OUT OF IT, HUH? >>
NO. >> DID YOU GET HIS
NO. >> DID YOU GET HIS
RESPONSIBILITY SPEECH?
DID YOU GET HIS
RESPONSIBILITY SPEECH? >> YEAH.
RESPONSIBILITY SPEECH? >> YEAH.
THE LONG OR SHORT VERSION?
YEAH. >> THE LONG OR SHORT
VERSION? >> THE LONG VERSION.
THE LONG OR SHORT VERSION? >> THE
LONG VERSION. >> WITH THE POT OF COFFEE?
THE LONG VERSION. >> WITH
THE POT OF COFFEE? >> UH-HUH.
WITH THE POT OF COFFEE? >>
UH-HUH. >> SO WHAT DID YOU TELL HIM?
UH-HUH. >> SO WHAT DID YOU
TELL HIM? >> I TOLD HIM I'D DO MY BEST.
SO WHAT DID YOU TELL HIM? >> I TOLD
HIM I'D DO MY BEST. >> WAS THAT YOUR BEST?
I TOLD HIM I'D DO MY BEST. >>
WAS THAT YOUR BEST? >> YEAH.
WAS THAT YOUR BEST? >>
YEAH. >> AND THE RECITAL IS WHEN?
YEAH. >> AND THE RECITAL
IS WHEN? >> IN FIVE DAYS.
I'M IN BIG TROUBLE.
[MUSIC]
OH, I'M NOT JOGGING WITH YOU.
YES, YOU KNOW THAT DEEP DOWN
WITH YOU. >> YES, YOU KNOW THAT
DEEP DOWN INSIDE YOU WANT TO.
YES, YOU KNOW THAT DEEP DOWN INSIDE
YOU WANT TO. YOU KNOW THAT YOU'RE GOING
INSIDE YOU WANT TO. YOU KNOW THAT
YOU'RE GOING TO WAKE UP IN THE MORNING WITH
YOU KNOW THAT YOU'RE GOING TO WAKE UP IN
THE MORNING WITH AN IRRESISTIBLE URGE TO GO
TO WAKE UP IN THE MORNING WITH AN IRRESISTIBLE
URGE TO GO JOGGING WITH YOUR HUSBAND.
AN IRRESISTIBLE URGE TO GO JOGGING WITH
YOUR HUSBAND. >> JOGGING WITH ALL OF THAT?
JOGGING WITH YOUR HUSBAND. >> JOGGING
WITH ALL OF THAT? LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE GOING
JOGGING WITH ALL OF THAT? LOOKS
LIKE YOU'RE GOING ON A SPACE WALK.
LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE GOING ON A
SPACE WALK. >> CLAIRE, IN ORDER TO GO
ON A SPACE WALK. >> CLAIRE, IN ORDER
TO GO JOGGING AND DO IT PROPERLY,
CLAIRE, IN ORDER TO GO JOGGING AND DO
IT PROPERLY, YOU MUST HAVE THE NECESSARY
JOGGING AND DO IT PROPERLY, YOU
MUST HAVE THE NECESSARY EQUIPMENT.
YOU MUST HAVE THE NECESSARY
EQUIPMENT. >> CLIFF, WHY CAN'T YOU BE
EQUIPMENT. >> CLIFF, WHY CAN'T YOU
BE SATISFIED WITH A NICE PLEASANT
CLIFF, WHY CAN'T YOU BE SATISFIED
WITH A NICE PLEASANT JOG IN THE PARK?
SATISFIED WITH A NICE PLEASANT JOG IN
THE PARK? >> BECAUSE SERIOUS JOGGERS ARE
JOG IN THE PARK? >> BECAUSE SERIOUS
JOGGERS ARE NOT SATISFIED WITH A NICE
BECAUSE SERIOUS JOGGERS ARE NOT SATISFIED
WITH A NICE PLEASANT JOG IN THE PARK.
NOT SATISFIED WITH A NICE PLEASANT
JOG IN THE PARK. NOW, I HAVE THIS, WHICH
PLEASANT JOG IN THE PARK. NOW, I HAVE
THIS, WHICH MEASURES THE DISTANCE, THIS
NOW, I HAVE THIS, WHICH MEASURES THE
DISTANCE, THIS WHICH MEASURES THE TIME THAT
MEASURES THE DISTANCE, THIS WHICH MEASURES
THE TIME THAT I RAN THE DISTANCE IN, AND THIS
WHICH MEASURES THE TIME THAT I RAN THE DISTANCE
IN, AND THIS WHICH MEASURES THE HYDRO OUTPUT
I RAN THE DISTANCE IN, AND THIS WHICH
MEASURES THE HYDRO OUTPUT RATIO, YOU SEE.
WHICH MEASURES THE HYDRO OUTPUT
RATIO, YOU SEE. >> YOU MEAN SWEAT?
RATIO, YOU SEE. >> YOU
MEAN SWEAT? >> YES, OKAY.
YOU MEAN SWEAT? >> YES,
OKAY. >> CLIFF, JOGGING WITH YOU
YES, OKAY. >> CLIFF,
JOGGING WITH YOU IS NOT FUN.
CLIFF, JOGGING WITH YOU IS
NOT FUN. >> CLAIRE, LET ME TELL YOU...
IS NOT FUN. >> CLAIRE, LET ME TELL
YOU... YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT FUN?
CLAIRE, LET ME TELL YOU... YOU WANT TO
TALK ABOUT FUN? YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT
YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT FUN? YOU
WANT TO TALK ABOUT WHAT IS FUN?
YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT WHAT
IS FUN? THIS IS THE WAY I JOG.
WHAT IS FUN? THIS IS THE
WAY I JOG. SEE, I'M SERIOUS.
THIS IS THE WAY I JOG. SEE,
I'M SERIOUS. I HAVE THE PEPPER.
SEE, I'M SERIOUS. I HAVE THE
PEPPER. YOU UNDERSTAND?
I HAVE THE PEPPER. YOU
UNDERSTAND? I HAVE THE PEPPER.
YOU UNDERSTAND? I HAVE THE
PEPPER. THIS IS THE WAY I'M MOVING.
I HAVE THE PEPPER. THIS IS THE WAY I'M
MOVING. THIS IS THE WAY MY WIFE JOGS.
THIS IS THE WAY I'M MOVING. THIS IS THE
WAY MY WIFE JOGS. MUST HAVE AT LEAST THREE
THIS IS THE WAY MY WIFE JOGS. MUST
HAVE AT LEAST THREE OF THESE TUCKED HERE,
MUST HAVE AT LEAST THREE OF THESE
TUCKED HERE, AND THEN SHE BURSTS OUT!
"OH, CLIFF, CLIFF!
YOU'RE MOVING TOO FAST!"
NOW, I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU CAN BURN
OFF THERE, OTHER THAN THESE TISSUES.
BURN OFF THERE, OTHER THAN
THESE TISSUES. >> CLIFF, I DO NOT ENJOY
THESE TISSUES. >> CLIFF, I DO NOT
ENJOY JOGGING FULL SPEED CARRYING
CLIFF, I DO NOT ENJOY JOGGING FULL
SPEED CARRYING 59 POUNDS OF UNNECESSARY
JOGGING FULL SPEED CARRYING 59 POUNDS OF
UNNECESSARY EQUIPMENT WHILE YOU SCREAM,
59 POUNDS OF UNNECESSARY EQUIPMENT WHILE
YOU SCREAM, "MOVE IT, CLAIRE, MOVE IT!
EQUIPMENT WHILE YOU SCREAM, "MOVE
IT, CLAIRE, MOVE IT! NO PAIN, NO GAIN!"
"MOVE IT, CLAIRE, MOVE IT! NO PAIN,
NO GAIN!" NOW, WE ALWAYS GET IN
NO PAIN, NO GAIN!" NOW, WE ALWAYS
GET IN AN ARGUMENT AND THEN I END UP
NOW, WE ALWAYS GET IN AN ARGUMENT
AND THEN I END UP WALKING HOME ALONE AND...
AN ARGUMENT AND THEN I END UP WALKING
HOME ALONE AND... I HATE JOGGING WITH YOU.
WALKING HOME ALONE AND... I HATE
JOGGING WITH YOU. >> [LAUGHING] OKAY.
I HATE JOGGING WITH YOU. >>
[LAUGHING] OKAY. [KNOCKING]
[LAUGHING] OKAY. [KNOCKING]
AND WHOEVER IS UP AT THIS
[KNOCKING] >> AND WHOEVER IS UP
AT THIS HOUR HAD BETTER HAVE A GOOD
AND WHOEVER IS UP AT THIS HOUR
HAD BETTER HAVE A GOOD EXCUSE!
HOUR HAD BETTER HAVE A GOOD
EXCUSE! >> CAN'T SLEEP... GOOD ENOUGH?
EXCUSE! >> CAN'T SLEEP... GOOD
ENOUGH? >> WHAT'S THE MATTER, HONEY?
CAN'T SLEEP... GOOD ENOUGH? >> WHAT'S THE
MATTER, HONEY? >> DAD, I DON'T THINK I CAN BE
WHAT'S THE MATTER, HONEY? >> DAD,
I DON'T THINK I CAN BE IN THIS RECITAL.
WHY? >> [RASPY] I HAVE A SORE
THROAT. >> THE RECITAL'S IN FOUR DAYS.
[RASPY] I HAVE A SORE THROAT. >> THE RECITAL'S
IN FOUR DAYS. >> IT'S ONE OF THOSE SLOW
THE RECITAL'S IN FOUR DAYS. >> IT'S
ONE OF THOSE SLOW BUILDING SORE THROATS.
IT'S ONE OF THOSE SLOW BUILDING
SORE THROATS. >> VANESSA, IT'S AFTER
BUILDING SORE THROATS. >>
VANESSA, IT'S AFTER MIDNIGHT.
VANESSA, IT'S AFTER
MIDNIGHT. NOW, WHAT'S WRONG?
MIDNIGHT. NOW, WHAT'S
WRONG? >> MOM, I'M WORRIED.
NOW, WHAT'S WRONG? >> MOM, I'M
WORRIED. >> WHAT ARE YOU WORRIED ABOUT?
MOM, I'M WORRIED. >> WHAT ARE YOU WORRIED
ABOUT? >> YOU'VE HEARD ME PRACTICING.
WHAT ARE YOU WORRIED ABOUT? >> YOU'VE HEARD
ME PRACTICING. I'M REALLY BAD, AREN'T I?
YOU'VE HEARD ME PRACTICING. I'M REALLY
BAD, AREN'T I? >> I THINK YOU'RE DOING
I'M REALLY BAD, AREN'T I? >> I
THINK YOU'RE DOING PRETTY WELL.
I THINK YOU'RE DOING PRETTY
WELL. >> YOU'RE ONLY 11 YEARS OLD,
PRETTY WELL. >> YOU'RE ONLY 11
YEARS OLD, NOBODY'S ASKING YOU TO PLAY
YOU'RE ONLY 11 YEARS OLD, NOBODY'S
ASKING YOU TO PLAY LIKE BENNY GOODMAN.
NOBODY'S ASKING YOU TO PLAY
LIKE BENNY GOODMAN. >> WHO?
LIKE BENNY GOODMAN. >> WHO?
LOOK, YOU'RE GOING TO BE
WHO? >> LOOK, YOU'RE
GOING TO BE JUST FINE.
LOOK, YOU'RE GOING TO BE JUST
FINE. I CAN UNDERSTAND YOUR DOUBTS.
JUST FINE. I CAN UNDERSTAND YOUR
DOUBTS. I HAD THE SAME DOUBTS WHEN
I CAN UNDERSTAND YOUR DOUBTS. I HAD THE SAME
DOUBTS WHEN I WENT OUT ON MY FIRST DATE.
I HAD THE SAME DOUBTS WHEN I WENT OUT ON
MY FIRST DATE. >> DAD, THIS IS NOT THE SAME
I WENT OUT ON MY FIRST DATE. >> DAD, THIS IS
NOT THE SAME THING... YOU HAVE TO PRACTICE
DAD, THIS IS NOT THE SAME
THING... YOU HAVE TO PRACTICE TO DO THIS.
THING... YOU HAVE TO PRACTICE TO
DO THIS. >> LISTEN, I'M TELLING YOU,
TO DO THIS. >> LISTEN, I'M TELLING
YOU, MY FIRST DATE I HAD TO PRACTICE.
LISTEN, I'M TELLING YOU, MY FIRST DATE I HAD
TO PRACTICE. NOW, WHEN I WAS 13 AND A HALF
MY FIRST DATE I HAD TO PRACTICE. NOW, WHEN
I WAS 13 AND A HALF YEARS OLD, MY VOICE WAS
NOW, WHEN I WAS 13 AND A HALF YEARS OLD, MY
VOICE WAS CRACKING AND I WAS EMBARRASSED
YEARS OLD, MY VOICE WAS CRACKING
AND I WAS EMBARRASSED ABOUT IT.
CRACKING AND I WAS EMBARRASSED
ABOUT IT. AND PEOPLE WOULD SAY,
ABOUT IT. AND PEOPLE WOULD
SAY, "WHAT IS YOUR NAME?"
AND PEOPLE WOULD SAY, "WHAT IS YOUR
NAME?" AND I'D SAY, [CRACKLY] "MY NAME
"WHAT IS YOUR NAME?" AND I'D SAY,
[CRACKLY] "MY NAME IS HEATHCLIFF HUXTABLE."
AND I'D SAY, [CRACKLY] "MY NAME IS HEATHCLIFF
HUXTABLE." AND I DIDN'T WANT TO SOUND LIKE
IS HEATHCLIFF HUXTABLE." AND I DIDN'T WANT
TO SOUND LIKE THAT; I WANTED TO SOUND SMOOTH
AND I DIDN'T WANT TO SOUND LIKE THAT; I WANTED
TO SOUND SMOOTH AND MATURE, SO I PRACTICED.
THAT; I WANTED TO SOUND SMOOTH AND MATURE,
SO I PRACTICED. "WHAT IS YOUR NAME, SON?"
AND MATURE, SO I PRACTICED. "WHAT IS
YOUR NAME, SON?" "HEATHCLIFF HUXTABLE.
"WHAT IS YOUR NAME, SON?" "HEATHCLIFF
HUXTABLE. HEATHCLIFF HUXTABLE.
"HEATHCLIFF HUXTABLE. HEATHCLIFF
HUXTABLE. HEATHCLIFF HUXTABLE."
HEATHCLIFF HUXTABLE. HEATHCLIFF
HUXTABLE." AND THEN I BEGAN TO PRACTICE
HEATHCLIFF HUXTABLE." AND THEN I BEGAN TO
PRACTICE MY SMILES... I HAD THREE OF 'EM.
AND THEN I BEGAN TO PRACTICE MY SMILES... I
HAD THREE OF 'EM. I HAD A FULL SMILE.
MY SMILES... I HAD THREE OF 'EM. I HAD A
FULL SMILE. I HAD A THREE-QUARTER SMILE.
I HAD A FULL SMILE. I HAD A THREE-QUARTER
SMILE. AND THEN I HAD A QUARTER SMILE.
I HAD A THREE-QUARTER SMILE. AND THEN I HAD
A QUARTER SMILE. AND I PRACTICED ALL OF THOSE
AND THEN I HAD A QUARTER SMILE.
AND I PRACTICED ALL OF THOSE THINGS.
AND I PRACTICED ALL OF THOSE
THINGS. AND THEN THE NIGHT OF MY DATE,
THINGS. AND THEN THE NIGHT OF MY
DATE, I WALKED UP TO THE HOUSE, I WAS
AND THEN THE NIGHT OF MY DATE, I WALKED UP TO
THE HOUSE, I WAS NERVOUS, BUT I HAD PRACTICED.
I WALKED UP TO THE HOUSE, I WAS NERVOUS, BUT
I HAD PRACTICED. I RANG THE DOORBELL AND HER
NERVOUS, BUT I HAD PRACTICED. I RANG THE
DOORBELL AND HER FATHER OPENED THE DOOR,
I RANG THE DOORBELL AND HER FATHER OPENED
THE DOOR, AND HE SAID, "WHAT DO YOU WANT?"
FATHER OPENED THE DOOR, AND HE
SAID, "WHAT DO YOU WANT?" AND I SAID,
AND HE SAID, "WHAT DO YOU WANT?"
AND I SAID, [CRACKLY] "MY NAME IS,"
AND I SAID, [CRACKLY] "MY
NAME IS," AND I RAN AWAY,
[CRACKLY] "MY NAME IS," AND I RAN
AWAY, I RAN FOR ABOUT A BLOCK.
AND I RAN AWAY, I RAN FOR ABOUT A
BLOCK. AND THEN I STOPPED MYSELF
I RAN FOR ABOUT A BLOCK. AND THEN I
STOPPED MYSELF AND I SAID, "NO, NO, NO,
AND THEN I STOPPED MYSELF AND I
SAID, "NO, NO, NO, YOU PRACTICED!
AND I SAID, "NO, NO, NO, YOU
PRACTICED! GO BACK THERE!
YOU PRACTICED! GO
BACK THERE! GIVE IT TO 'EM!
GO BACK THERE! GIVE IT TO 'EM!
THREE-QUARTER, ONE-QUARTER,
GIVE IT TO 'EM! THREE-QUARTER,
ONE-QUARTER, FULL!
THREE-QUARTER, ONE-QUARTER,
FULL! AND I WENT BACK AND I RANG
FULL! AND I WENT BACK AND I
RANG THE BELL, AND HE SAID,
AND I WENT BACK AND I RANG THE
BELL, AND HE SAID, "WHO ARE YOU?"
THE BELL, AND HE SAID, "WHO
ARE YOU?" AND I SAID, "MY NAME IS
"WHO ARE YOU?" AND I SAID, "MY
NAME IS HEATHCLIFF HUXTABLE."
AND I SAID, "MY NAME IS HEATHCLIFF
HUXTABLE." NOW, DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT?
HEATHCLIFF HUXTABLE." NOW,
DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT? >> YES.
NOW, DO YOU UNDERSTAND
THAT? >> YES. >> ALL RIGHT.
YES. >> ALL RIGHT. AND
SO NOW YOU FEEL BETTER?
ALL RIGHT. AND SO NOW
YOU FEEL BETTER? >> NO.
AND SO NOW YOU FEEL
BETTER? >> NO. GOODNIGHT.
NO. GOODNIGHT. >>
GOODNIGHT, VANESSA.
[MUSIC]
HA-HUH-HUH-HA-HE-HE! [MAKING
AIRPLANE NOISES] [MAKING SHOOTING NOISES]
[MAKING AIRPLANE NOISES]
[MAKING SHOOTING NOISES] CHECK!
[MAKING SHOOTING
NOISES] CHECK! MATE!
CHECK! MATE! AHHHH!
MATE! AHHHH! THAT'S
FOUR IN A ROW FOR
AHHHH! THAT'S FOUR IN A ROW FOR
THE MAN ON THE COMEBACK TRAIL!
THAT'S FOUR IN A ROW FOR THE MAN ON THE
COMEBACK TRAIL! >> DAD, YOU'RE A BAD LOSER,
THE MAN ON THE COMEBACK TRAIL! >> DAD, YOU'RE
A BAD LOSER, BUT YOU'RE A WORSE WINNER.
DAD, YOU'RE A BAD LOSER, BUT YOU'RE A
WORSE WINNER. >> AND NOW ON MY DRIVE FOR
BUT YOU'RE A WORSE WINNER. >> AND NOW ON
MY DRIVE FOR FIVE, I AM GOING TO, MY BOY,
AND NOW ON MY DRIVE FOR FIVE, I AM GOING
TO, MY BOY, LET YOU HAVE THE FIRST MOVE.
FIVE, I AM GOING TO, MY BOY, LET YOU HAVE THE
FIRST MOVE. >> WAIT A MINUTE, DAD, HOLD ON.
LET YOU HAVE THE FIRST MOVE. >> WAIT A
MINUTE, DAD, HOLD ON. >> WHAT'S THE MATTER,
WAIT A MINUTE, DAD, HOLD ON. >> WHAT'S
THE MATTER, SOMETHING TROUBLING YOU, SON?
WHAT'S THE MATTER, SOMETHING
TROUBLING YOU, SON? >> NO.
SOMETHING TROUBLING
YOU, SON? >> NO. >> WHAT?
NO. >> WHAT? ARE
YOU LOOKING FOR RAIN?
WHAT? ARE YOU
LOOKING FOR RAIN? >> NO.
ARE YOU LOOKING FOR RAIN? >> NO.
PERHAPS A PENNY FROM HEAVEN
NO. >> PERHAPS A PENNY FROM
HEAVEN BEING PLAYED ON THE CLARINET
PERHAPS A PENNY FROM HEAVEN BEING
PLAYED ON THE CLARINET BY YOUR SISTER?
BEING PLAYED ON THE CLARINET BY
YOUR SISTER? >> HEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT
BY YOUR SISTER? >> HEY, I DON'T
KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
HEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE
TALKING ABOUT. >> WELL, FORGET IT.
YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT. >> WELL,
FORGET IT. SHE'S NOT PLAYING 'TIL
WELL, FORGET IT. SHE'S NOT
PLAYING 'TIL MR. HAMPTON GETS HERE.
SHE'S NOT PLAYING 'TIL MR. HAMPTON
GETS HERE. >> WHEN'S THAT?
MR. HAMPTON GETS HERE.
WHEN'S THAT? >> SOON.
WHEN'S THAT? >>
SOON. >> HALFTIME.
SOON. >> HALFTIME.
OH-HO-HO-HO!
HALFTIME. >> OH-HO-HO-HO!
WHY'S MR. HAMPTON COMING?
OH-HO-HO-HO! >> WHY'S MR. HAMPTON
COMING? >> MR. HAMPTON IS COMING
WHY'S MR. HAMPTON COMING? >> MR. HAMPTON
IS COMING TO GIVE YOUR SISTER SOME
MR. HAMPTON IS COMING TO GIVE YOUR
SISTER SOME INSTRUCTIONS ON THE CLARINET.
TO GIVE YOUR SISTER SOME INSTRUCTIONS
ON THE CLARINET. >> HE TOLD ME HE KNEW YOU
INSTRUCTIONS ON THE CLARINET. >> HE TOLD
ME HE KNEW YOU WHEN YOU WERE A LITTLE BOY.
HE TOLD ME HE KNEW YOU WHEN
YOU WERE A LITTLE BOY. >> THAT'S TRUE.
WHEN YOU WERE A LITTLE BOY. >> THAT'S
TRUE. MR. HAMPTON IS AN OLD FRIEND.
THAT'S TRUE. MR. HAMPTON IS AN
OLD FRIEND. HE WAS A MUSIC TEACHER
MR. HAMPTON IS AN OLD FRIEND. HE WAS
A MUSIC TEACHER WHEN I WAS IN SCHOOL.
HE WAS A MUSIC TEACHER WHEN I WAS IN
SCHOOL. >> THEY HAD MUSIC WHEN YOU WENT
WHEN I WAS IN SCHOOL. >> THEY HAD
MUSIC WHEN YOU WENT TO SCHOOL?
THEY HAD MUSIC WHEN
YOU WENT TO SCHOOL? >> SOME.
TO SCHOOL? >> SOME. >>
DID THEY HAVE POTATO CHIPS?
SOME. >> DID THEY HAVE POTATO
CHIPS? >> YES, WE HAD POTATO CHIPS.
DID THEY HAVE TV? >> NO, THEY DIDN'T
HAVE TV. >> THEN WHAT DID YOU WATCH
NO, THEY DIDN'T HAVE TV. >> THEN WHAT
DID YOU WATCH WHILE YOU WERE EATING
THEN WHAT DID YOU WATCH WHILE
YOU WERE EATING POTATO CHIPS?
WHILE YOU WERE EATING
POTATO CHIPS? >> RADIO.
POTATO CHIPS? >>
RADIO. [DOORBELL RINGS]
HI, MR. HAMPTON. >>
HI, DOC. HOW YOU BEEN?
HI, DOC. HOW YOU
BEEN? >> HI, MR. HAMPTON!
HOW YOU BEEN? >> HI,
MR. HAMPTON! >> HI, RUDY!
HI, MR. HAMPTON! >> HI,
RUDY! LONG TIME NO SEE.
HI, RUDY! LONG TIME
NO SEE. >> DO IT, DO IT!
LONG TIME NO SEE. >>
DO IT, DO IT! >> DO WHAT?
DO IT, DO IT! >> DO
WHAT? >> YOU KNOW!
DO WHAT? >> YOU KNOW!
OH, YOU ALWAYS ASK ME
YOU KNOW! >> OH, YOU
ALWAYS ASK ME TO DO THAT.
OH, YOU ALWAYS ASK
ME TO DO THAT. WATCH.
DADDY, DADDY, LOOK! HIS FACE
IS GONNA EXPLODE! >> OH, NO, NO,
HIS FACE IS GONNA EXPLODE! >>
OH, NO, NO, NOT OLD RUBBER FACE.
OH, NO, NO, NOT OLD RUBBER
FACE. >> CAN HE STAY FOR DINNER?
NOT OLD RUBBER FACE. >> CAN
HE STAY FOR DINNER? >> MM-HMM.
CAN HE STAY FOR DINNER? >>
MM-HMM. >> I WANNA WATCH HIM PUT
MM-HMM. >> I WANNA WATCH HIM
PUT A WHOLE CHICKEN IN HIS MOUTH.
I WANNA WATCH HIM PUT A WHOLE
CHICKEN IN HIS MOUTH. >> IF YOU'RE NICE,
A WHOLE CHICKEN IN HIS MOUTH. >> IF
YOU'RE NICE, I'LL DO SOMETHING FOR YOU.
IF YOU'RE NICE, I'LL DO
SOMETHING FOR YOU. WATCH NOW.
[PLAYING MOUTH HARP]
I LOVE YOU, RUDY. I LOVE
YOU, RUDY. >> I LOVE YOU TOO,
I LOVE YOU, RUDY. >> I
LOVE YOU TOO, MR. HAMPTON.
VANESSA! >> YES, DAD. >>
COME ON DOWN, PLEASE, HUN.
YES, DAD. >> COME ON DOWN,
PLEASE, HUN. >> YEAH... MR. HAMPTON,
COME ON DOWN, PLEASE, HUN. >> YEAH...
MR. HAMPTON, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
YEAH... MR. HAMPTON, WHAT ARE YOU
DOING HERE? >> GOT US A LITTLE INSURANCE
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? >> GOT US A
LITTLE INSURANCE POLICY ON THE RECITAL.
GOT US A LITTLE INSURANCE POLICY ON
THE RECITAL. >> HE'S GONNA TAKE MY PLACE?
POLICY ON THE RECITAL. >> HE'S GONNA TAKE
MY PLACE? >> NO, HE'S GOING TO GIVE YOU
HE'S GONNA TAKE MY PLACE? >> NO,
HE'S GOING TO GIVE YOU PRIVATE LESSONS.
NO, HE'S GOING TO GIVE YOU PRIVATE
LESSONS. >> COME ON, LET'S GET STARTED.
PRIVATE LESSONS. >> COME ON, LET'S
GET STARTED. >> THANK YOU, DADDY.
COME ON, LET'S GET STARTED. >>
THANK YOU, DADDY. >> IT WON'T HELP.
[BASSOON PLAYING]
BRAVO! BRAVO!
THANK YOU, LADIES
BRAVO! >> THANK YOU, LADIES
AND GENTLEMEN, THAT WAS
THANK YOU, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
THAT WAS BOBBY TUCKER ON THE BASSOON,
AND GENTLEMEN, THAT WAS BOBBY TUCKER
ON THE BASSOON, GIVING YOU HIS RENDITION
BOBBY TUCKER ON THE BASSOON, GIVING YOU
HIS RENDITION OF "FLIGHT OF THE BUMBLEBEE."
GIVING YOU HIS RENDITION OF "FLIGHT
OF THE BUMBLEBEE." >> IT WAS MORE LIKE
OF "FLIGHT OF THE BUMBLEBEE." >> IT
WAS MORE LIKE "THE WOUNDED MOTH."
IT WAS MORE LIKE "THE WOUNDED
MOTH." IN JUST A MOMENT NOW WE WILL
"THE WOUNDED MOTH." IN JUST A MOMENT
NOW WE WILL HEAR FROM OUR BEGINNER'S CLASS.
IN JUST A MOMENT NOW WE WILL HEAR
FROM OUR BEGINNER'S CLASS. >> THAT'S ME.
HEAR FROM OUR BEGINNER'S CLASS.
THAT'S ME. >> GOOD LUCK, HONEY.
THAT'S ME. >> GOOD LUCK,
HONEY. >> IT BETTER BE GOOD.
GOOD LUCK, HONEY. >> IT BETTER
BE GOOD. I GAVE UP HANGING OUT WITH
IT BETTER BE GOOD. I GAVE UP
HANGING OUT WITH MY FRIENDS TO SEE THIS.
I GAVE UP HANGING OUT WITH MY
FRIENDS TO SEE THIS. >> GO GET 'EM, KID.
MY FRIENDS TO SEE THIS. >> GO
GET 'EM, KID. HEY, WHERE YOU GOING?
GO GET 'EM, KID. HEY, WHERE YOU
GOING? >> MY KID ALREADY PLAYED.
HEY, WHERE YOU GOING? >> MY KID
ALREADY PLAYED. >> WHO, THE BUMBLEBEE?
MY KID ALREADY PLAYED. >>
WHO, THE BUMBLEBEE? NO, SIT DOWN,
WHO, THE BUMBLEBEE? NO,
SIT DOWN, MY KID'S GOING ON.
NO, SIT DOWN, MY KID'S GOING
ON. >> I'M PAYING FOUR DOLLARS
MY KID'S GOING ON. >> I'M PAYING
FOUR DOLLARS AN HOUR FOR PARKING.
I'M PAYING FOUR DOLLARS AN HOUR
FOR PARKING. >> YEAH, WELL, I DON'T CARE,
AN HOUR FOR PARKING. >> YEAH,
WELL, I DON'T CARE, MY... FOUR DOLLARS?
YEAH, WELL, I DON'T CARE,
MY... FOUR DOLLARS? I PAID SIX.
MY... FOUR DOLLARS? I PAID
SIX. COME ON, WATCH MY KID.
I PAID SIX. COME ON, WATCH
MY KID. >> AND NOW, LADIES AND
COME ON, WATCH MY KID. >> AND NOW,
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, OUR BEGINNER'S CLASS
AND NOW, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
OUR BEGINNER'S CLASS WITH THEIR MEDLEY
GENTLEMEN, OUR BEGINNER'S CLASS WITH
THEIR MEDLEY OF POPULAR SONG, WITH SOLO
WITH THEIR MEDLEY OF POPULAR SONG,
WITH SOLO BY MISS VANESSA HUXTABLE.
OF POPULAR SONG, WITH SOLO BY
MISS VANESSA HUXTABLE. >> WOO!
[SQUEAKING] >> I WANNA GO
HOME! [SQUEAKING AND PLAYING]
[SQUEAKING AND PLAYING]
[PLAYING]
[APPLAUDING]
ENCORE! ENCORE! ENCORE!
ENTER VANESSA HUXTABLE, QUEEN
OF SWING! MASTER OF THE MOUTHPIECE,
QUEEN OF SWING! MASTER OF THE
MOUTHPIECE, WIZARD OF THE WOODWINDS!
MASTER OF THE MOUTHPIECE, WIZARD OF
THE WOODWINDS! >> NO AUTOGRAPHS, PLEASE.
WIZARD OF THE WOODWINDS! >> NO AUTOGRAPHS,
PLEASE. >> SHE'S GOING TO BE IMPOSSIBLE
NO AUTOGRAPHS, PLEASE. >> SHE'S
GOING TO BE IMPOSSIBLE TO LIVE WITH.
SHE'S GOING TO BE IMPOSSIBLE TO
LIVE WITH. >> HEY, WAY TO GO, VANESSA.
TO LIVE WITH. >> HEY, WAY TO GO,
VANESSA. >> YEAH, YOU WERE REAL... GOOD.
HEY, WAY TO GO, VANESSA. >> YEAH, YOU WERE
REAL... GOOD. >> WELL, NOW THAT YOU'RE A
YEAH, YOU WERE REAL... GOOD. >> WELL, NOW
THAT YOU'RE A STAR, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?
WELL, NOW THAT YOU'RE A STAR, WHAT
ARE YOU GOING TO DO? >> RUDY, ENJOY.
STAR, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO
DO? >> RUDY, ENJOY. >> OH, BOY!
RUDY, ENJOY. >> OH,
BOY! >> TWO HUNDRED
OH, BOY! >> TWO HUNDRED
AND FORTY FIVE DOLLARS.
TWO HUNDRED AND FORTY
FIVE DOLLARS. >> VANESSA?
AND FORTY FIVE DOLLARS. >>
VANESSA? >> MOM, THE RECITAL IS OVER.
VANESSA? >> MOM, THE RECITAL
IS OVER. >> YES HONEY, BUT YOU DID
MOM, THE RECITAL IS OVER. >> YES
HONEY, BUT YOU DID SO WELL THIS EVENING.
YES HONEY, BUT YOU DID SO WELL
THIS EVENING. DON'T YOU WANT TO AT LEAST
SO WELL THIS EVENING. DON'T
YOU WANT TO AT LEAST RECONSIDER?
DON'T YOU WANT TO AT LEAST
RECONSIDER? >> NO, NOT REALLY.
RECONSIDER? >> NO, NOT
REALLY. >> GYMNASTICS?
NO, NOT REALLY. >>
GYMNASTICS? >> JANET MEISER HATED
GYMNASTICS? >> JANET
MEISER HATED GYMNASTICS.
JANET MEISER HATED
GYMNASTICS. >> REALLY?
GYMNASTICS. >> REALLY?
WHAT'S SHE DOING NOW?
REALLY? >> WHAT'S SHE
DOING NOW? >> HORSEBACK RIDING.
WHAT'S SHE DOING NOW? >>
HORSEBACK RIDING. >> HORSEBACK RIDING?
HORSEBACK RIDING. >>
HORSEBACK RIDING? WE'RE RENTING.
[MUSIC]
"THE COSBY SHOW" IS VIDEOTAPED
IN FRONT OF A LIVE STUDIO AUDIENCE.