The Cosby Show (1984–1992): Season 1, Episode 11 - You're Not a Mother Night - full transcript
Clair is having too many mothering days with everyone wanting her attention and to do things for them. Cliff decides it is time for a mother's day off. He takes her for a romantic day and night at a hotel.
[MUSIC]
[MUSIC]
RUDY, COME ON! YOU'RE
GONNA MAKE US LATE. >> BYE, RUDY.
YOU'RE GONNA MAKE US LATE. >>
BYE, RUDY. I'M GONNA MISS YOU ALL DAY.
BYE, RUDY. I'M GONNA MISS
YOU ALL DAY. >> MAYBE I SHOULD GO
I'M GONNA MISS YOU ALL DAY. >> MAYBE
I SHOULD GO TO THE OFFICE WITH YOU.
MAYBE I SHOULD GO TO THE OFFICE
WITH YOU. >> NO, YOU GO TO SCHOOL,
TO THE OFFICE WITH YOU. >> NO, YOU
GO TO SCHOOL, AND I'LL GO TO THE OFFICE.
NO, YOU GO TO SCHOOL, AND I'LL GO TO
THE OFFICE. >> YOU SURE YOU'LL BE OKAY?
AND I'LL GO TO THE OFFICE. >> YOU
SURE YOU'LL BE OKAY? >> I'LL MAKE IT.
YOU SURE YOU'LL BE OKAY? >> I'LL
MAKE IT. >> YOU KNOW, I WORRY ABOUT YOU
I'LL MAKE IT. >> YOU KNOW, I
WORRY ABOUT YOU SOMETIMES.
YOU KNOW, I WORRY ABOUT
YOU SOMETIMES. >> BYE, BABY.
SOMETIMES. >> BYE,
BABY. I'LL SEE YOU LATER
BYE, BABY. I'LL SEE YOU
LATER THIS AFTERNOON.
RUDY! RUDY! RUDY, YOUR LUNCH!
RUDY! RUDY, YOUR LUNCH! RUDY!
SOMEBODY MUST HAVE RUN
OUTSIDE NAKED.
CLAIR! YOU FORGOT YOUR
BRIEFCASE. I KNOW A LOT OF PEOPLE
YOU FORGOT YOUR BRIEFCASE. I KNOW A
LOT OF PEOPLE FORGOT THEIR BRIEFCASES,
I KNOW A LOT OF PEOPLE FORGOT THEIR
BRIEFCASES, WENT ON TO LIVE NORMAL LIVES.
FORGOT THEIR BRIEFCASES, WENT ON TO LIVE
NORMAL LIVES. >> DOES THIS MAKE SENSE TO YOU?
WENT ON TO LIVE NORMAL LIVES. >> DOES THIS
MAKE SENSE TO YOU? A WOMAN GRADUATES FROM
DOES THIS MAKE SENSE TO YOU? A WOMAN
GRADUATES FROM LAW SCHOOL SO SHE CAN RUN
A WOMAN GRADUATES FROM LAW SCHOOL SO
SHE CAN RUN 2 1/2 BLOCKS TO CHASE A CHILD
LAW SCHOOL SO SHE CAN RUN 2 1/2 BLOCKS
TO CHASE A CHILD WHO SAYS SHE DOES NOT LIKE
2 1/2 BLOCKS TO CHASE A CHILD WHO SAYS
SHE DOES NOT LIKE THE SANDWICH SHE MADE.
WHO SAYS SHE DOES NOT LIKE THE SANDWICH
SHE MADE. >> WHAT KIND OF SANDWICH
THE SANDWICH SHE MADE. >> WHAT
KIND OF SANDWICH DID YOU MAKE FOR HER?
WHAT KIND OF SANDWICH DID YOU
MAKE FOR HER? >> RUDY MADE THE SANDWICH
DID YOU MAKE FOR HER? >> RUDY
MADE THE SANDWICH FOR HERSELF.
RUDY MADE THE SANDWICH FOR
HERSELF. SHE SAID THAT TUNA AND PEANUT
FOR HERSELF. SHE SAID THAT TUNA
AND PEANUT BUTTER SOUNDED GREAT,
SHE SAID THAT TUNA AND PEANUT BUTTER
SOUNDED GREAT, BUT IT JUST DIDN'T LOOK GOOD
BUTTER SOUNDED GREAT, BUT IT JUST
DIDN'T LOOK GOOD BETWEEN THE BREAD.
BUT IT JUST DIDN'T LOOK GOOD
BETWEEN THE BREAD. >> I AGREE WITH HER.
BETWEEN THE BREAD. >> I AGREE
WITH HER. >> I LOVE MY WORK,
I AGREE WITH HER. >> I LOVE
MY WORK, AND I'M DOING GREAT.
I LOVE MY WORK, AND I'M DOING
GREAT. BUT THEN I COME HOME AND I HAVE
AND I'M DOING GREAT. BUT THEN I COME
HOME AND I HAVE TO HELP PEOPLE WHO PUT
BUT THEN I COME HOME AND I HAVE TO HELP
PEOPLE WHO PUT THEIR CLOTHES ON BACKWARDS.
TO HELP PEOPLE WHO PUT THEIR CLOTHES
ON BACKWARDS. OR THEY WANT A CAR,
THEIR CLOTHES ON BACKWARDS. OR THEY
WANT A CAR, BUT THEY DON'T KNOW HOW
OR THEY WANT A CAR, BUT
THEY DON'T KNOW HOW TO DRIVE.
BUT THEY DON'T KNOW HOW TO
DRIVE. OR THEY WANT TO WATCH
TO DRIVE. OR THEY WANT TO WATCH
TELEVISION ALL NIGHT LONG UNTIL
OR THEY WANT TO WATCH TELEVISION ALL NIGHT
LONG UNTIL THEIR EYEBALLS POP OUT OF THEIR
TELEVISION ALL NIGHT LONG UNTIL THEIR EYEBALLS
POP OUT OF THEIR SOCKETS AND ROLL UNDER
THEIR EYEBALLS POP OUT OF THEIR
SOCKETS AND ROLL UNDER THE COUCH.
SOCKETS AND ROLL UNDER THE
COUCH. >> THEN IT'S THE KIDS?
THE COUCH. >> THEN
IT'S THE KIDS? >> NO.
THEN IT'S THE
KIDS? >> NO. >> NO?
NO. >> NO? >> NO,
I WANTED TO HAVE
NO? >> NO, I WANTED
TO HAVE THE KIDS.
NO, I WANTED TO HAVE THE
KIDS. THAT'S IMPORTANT TO US.
THE KIDS. THAT'S IMPORTANT TO
US. BUT THEN I GO TO WORK AND I SIT
THAT'S IMPORTANT TO US. BUT THEN I GO
TO WORK AND I SIT AT THAT DESK FOR WEEKS,
BUT THEN I GO TO WORK AND I SIT AT THAT
DESK FOR WEEKS, FOR HOURS PREPARING A BRIEF
AT THAT DESK FOR WEEKS, FOR HOURS PREPARING
A BRIEF AND MR. GREENBOOK, SR., COMES IN
FOR HOURS PREPARING A BRIEF AND MR. GREENBOOK,
SR., COMES IN TO TELL ME THE CASE HAS BEEN
AND MR. GREENBOOK, SR., COMES IN TO TELL
ME THE CASE HAS BEEN SETTLED OUT OF COURT.
TO TELL ME THE CASE HAS BEEN
SETTLED OUT OF COURT. I WANT TO SCREAM.
SETTLED OUT OF COURT. I WANT
TO SCREAM. >> SO IT'S WORK?
I WANT TO SCREAM.
SO IT'S WORK? >> NO.
SO IT'S WORK? >> NO. >> NO?
NO. >> NO? >> NO.
NO? >> NO. >> NO?
NO. >> NO? >>
NO, I LOVE MY WORK.
NO? >> NO, I LOVE MY
WORK. I JUST TOLD YOU.
NO, I LOVE MY WORK. I
JUST TOLD YOU. >> I'M SORRY.
I JUST TOLD YOU. >> I'M SORRY.
BUT THEN I COME HOME AGAIN,
I'M SORRY. >> BUT THEN I COME
HOME AGAIN, PEOPLE ARE CRYING.
BUT THEN I COME HOME AGAIN, PEOPLE
ARE CRYING. THEY NEED A BUTTON SOWN ON,
PEOPLE ARE CRYING. THEY NEED A BUTTON
SOWN ON, SOMEBODY'S DRINKING BUBBLE
THEY NEED A BUTTON SOWN ON,
SOMEBODY'S DRINKING BUBBLE BATH.
SOMEBODY'S DRINKING BUBBLE
BATH. >> THEN IT IS THE KIDS.
BATH. >> THEN IT
IS THE KIDS. >> NO.
THEN IT IS THE KIDS. >>
NO. >> IT'S THE KIDS AND WORK.
NO. >> IT'S THE
KIDS AND WORK. >> NO.
IT'S THE KIDS AND
WORK. >> NO. >> THEN IT'S ME!
NO. >> THEN IT'S ME! >> NO.
THEN IT'S ME! >> NO.
WELL, THEN CLAIR,
NO. >> WELL, THEN
CLAIR, WHAT IS IT?
WELL, THEN CLAIR, WHAT IS
IT? >> WHAT IT IS, IS A LIFE THAT'S
WHAT IS IT? >> WHAT IT IS, IS A LIFE
THAT'S SO CROWDED I DON'T HAVE TIME
WHAT IT IS, IS A LIFE THAT'S SO CROWDED
I DON'T HAVE TIME TO FIGURE OUT WHAT IT IS,
SO CROWDED I DON'T HAVE TIME TO FIGURE OUT
WHAT IT IS, 'CAUSE I'M A BE LATE FOR WORK.
TO FIGURE OUT WHAT IT IS, 'CAUSE I'M A BE
LATE FOR WORK. >> OH, NOW THEN I CAN HELP.
'CAUSE I'M A BE LATE FOR WORK. >> OH,
NOW THEN I CAN HELP. NOW LISTEN TO ME.
OH, NOW THEN I CAN HELP. NOW
LISTEN TO ME. STOP, STOP, STOP, STOP, STOP.
NOW LISTEN TO ME. STOP, STOP,
STOP, STOP, STOP. LISTEN TO ME, OKAY?
STOP, STOP, STOP, STOP, STOP.
LISTEN TO ME, OKAY? JUST LISTEN TO ME.
LISTEN TO ME, OKAY? JUST
LISTEN TO ME. JUST TAKE IT EASY.
JUST LISTEN TO ME. JUST TAKE IT
EASY. TONIGHT YOU AND I GO TO DINNER.
JUST TAKE IT EASY. TONIGHT YOU AND I GO
TO DINNER. OUT TO DINNER JUST THE TWO
TONIGHT YOU AND I GO TO DINNER. OUT
TO DINNER JUST THE TWO OF US, OKAY?
OUT TO DINNER JUST THE TWO
OF US, OKAY? >> I'D LIKE THAT.
OF US, OKAY? >> I'D
LIKE THAT. >> GOOD.
I'D LIKE THAT. >> GOOD.
NOW HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE.
GOOD. NOW HERE, HERE, HERE,
HERE. THINK ABOUT THIS ONE HERE.
NOW HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE. THINK ABOUT
THIS ONE HERE. WE GO TO THE BILTMORE HOTEL
THINK ABOUT THIS ONE HERE. WE GO TO THE
BILTMORE HOTEL BECAUSE I KNOW THE MANAGER
WE GO TO THE BILTMORE HOTEL
BECAUSE I KNOW THE MANAGER THERE.
BECAUSE I KNOW THE MANAGER
THERE. I DELIVERED HIS BABY, AND HE
THERE. I DELIVERED HIS BABY, AND
HE OWES ME BECAUSE THE BABY DOES
I DELIVERED HIS BABY, AND HE OWES ME BECAUSE
THE BABY DOES NOT LOOK LIKE HIM OR HIS WIFE.
OWES ME BECAUSE THE BABY DOES NOT
LOOK LIKE HIM OR HIS WIFE. I'M SERIOUS.
NOT LOOK LIKE HIM OR HIS
WIFE. I'M SERIOUS. >> OKAY.
I'M SERIOUS. >> OKAY.
DINNER AT THE BILTMORE.
OKAY. DINNER AT THE BILTMORE.
DINNER AT THE BILTMORE.
DINNER AT THE BILTMORE. >>
DINNER AT THE BILTMORE. >> YEAH.
DINNER AT THE BILTMORE. >>
YEAH. >> WAIT, WHOA, NOW LISTEN.
YEAH. >> WAIT, WHOA, NOW
LISTEN. NO, NO, HEAR ME NOW.
WAIT, WHOA, NOW LISTEN. NO,
NO, HEAR ME NOW. HEAR ME NOW.
NO, NO, HEAR ME NOW. HEAR ME
NOW. WE RENT A LIMOUSINE, TAKE US
HEAR ME NOW. WE RENT A LIMOUSINE,
TAKE US DOWN TO THE BILTMORE FOR
WE RENT A LIMOUSINE, TAKE US DOWN TO THE
BILTMORE FOR THE DINNER AND THEN TAKE A NICE
DOWN TO THE BILTMORE FOR THE DINNER AND THEN
TAKE A NICE LIMO DRIVE ON THE RIVER WITH
THE DINNER AND THEN TAKE A NICE LIMO DRIVE
ON THE RIVER WITH THE MOON BOUNCING OFF
LIMO DRIVE ON THE RIVER WITH THE MOON
BOUNCING OFF OF THE WATER, AND YOU CAN SEE
THE MOON BOUNCING OFF OF THE WATER,
AND YOU CAN SEE LIGHTS OF THE BUILDINGS
OF THE WATER, AND YOU CAN SEE LIGHTS
OF THE BUILDINGS AND THE BOATS GOING.
LIGHTS OF THE BUILDINGS AND
THE BOATS GOING. >> THE BOATS?
AND THE BOATS GOING. >>
THE BOATS? >> THE BOATS.
THE BOATS? >> THE BOATS.
OH, THAT'S BEAUTIFUL.
THE BOATS. >> OH, THAT'S
BEAUTIFUL. >> YES, IT IS, ALL RIGHT?
OH, THAT'S BEAUTIFUL. >>
YES, IT IS, ALL RIGHT? >> OH.
YES, IT IS, ALL
RIGHT? >> OH. >> YEAH.
OH. >> YEAH.
THANKS, CLIFF.
YEAH. >> THANKS,
CLIFF. >> I'LL SEE YOU LATER.
THANKS, CLIFF. >> I'LL
SEE YOU LATER. >> YEAH.
I'LL SEE YOU LATER. >>
YEAH. OH, WAIT A MINUTE!
YEAH. OH, WAIT A MINUTE! I
GOT ONE MORE AND THIS IS IT.
OH, WAIT A MINUTE! I GOT ONE MORE
AND THIS IS IT. WE WILL STAY OVER
I GOT ONE MORE AND THIS IS IT. WE
WILL STAY OVER AT THE BILTMORE.
WE WILL STAY OVER AT THE BILTMORE.
WE'RE GONNA SPEND THE NIGHT?
AT THE BILTMORE. >> WE'RE GONNA
SPEND THE NIGHT? >> SPEND THE NIGHT
WE'RE GONNA SPEND THE NIGHT?
SPEND THE NIGHT AT THE BILTMORE.
SPEND THE NIGHT AT THE
BILTMORE. >> WITHOUT THE CHILDREN?
AT THE BILTMORE. >> WITHOUT THE
CHILDREN? >> WELL, DEAR, IF WE TAKE
WITHOUT THE CHILDREN? >> WELL, DEAR, IF
WE TAKE THE CHILDREN, WHY ARE WE GOING?
WELL, DEAR, IF WE TAKE THE CHILDREN,
WHY ARE WE GOING? TONIGHT WE ARE NOT TAKING
THE CHILDREN, WHY ARE WE GOING? TONIGHT WE
ARE NOT TAKING THE CHILDREN BECAUSE TONIGHT IS
TONIGHT WE ARE NOT TAKING THE CHILDREN BECAUSE
TONIGHT IS "YOU ARE NOT A MOTHER" NIGHT.
THE CHILDREN BECAUSE TONIGHT IS "YOU ARE NOT
A MOTHER" NIGHT. >> CLIFF, I THINK THAT'S
"YOU ARE NOT A MOTHER" NIGHT. >>
CLIFF, I THINK THAT'S A WONDERFUL IDEA.
CLIFF, I THINK THAT'S A
WONDERFUL IDEA. >> ALL RIGHT, GOOD.
A WONDERFUL IDEA. >> ALL
RIGHT, GOOD. YOU LIKE THAT, HUH?
ALL RIGHT, GOOD. YOU
LIKE THAT, HUH? >> I LIKE THAT.
YOU LIKE THAT, HUH? >> I LIKE
THAT. >> OKAY, NOW YOU'RE RELAXED
I LIKE THAT. >> OKAY,
NOW YOU'RE RELAXED NOW?
OKAY, NOW YOU'RE
RELAXED NOW? >> I'M RELAXED.
NOW? >> I'M RELAXED. >>
YOU FEEL MUCH BETTER?
I'M RELAXED. >> YOU FEEL MUCH
BETTER? >> I FEEL MUCH BETTER.
YOU FEEL MUCH BETTER? >> I FEEL
MUCH BETTER. >> AND YOU'RE KIND OF JUST
I FEEL MUCH BETTER. >> AND
YOU'RE KIND OF JUST SMOOTHED OUT.
AND YOU'RE KIND OF JUST
SMOOTHED OUT. >> I'M SMOOTHED OUT.
SMOOTHED OUT. >> I'M
SMOOTHED OUT. >> YES, THAT'S IT.
I'M SMOOTHED OUT. >> YES,
THAT'S IT. AND YOU'RE LATE FOR WORK.
YES, THAT'S IT. AND
YOU'RE LATE FOR WORK. >> OH.
[MUSIC]
SO MRS. JENNINGS, FOR A WOMAN
PREGNANT 3 MONTHS, YOU'RE ALL RIGHT.
FOR A WOMAN PREGNANT 3 MONTHS, YOU'RE ALL
RIGHT. >> DOCTOR, COULD I... UM, COULD I
YOU'RE ALL RIGHT. >> DOCTOR, COULD I...
UM, COULD I TALK TO YOU ABOUT SOMETHING?
DOCTOR, COULD I... UM, COULD I TALK
TO YOU ABOUT SOMETHING? >> SURE.
TALK TO YOU ABOUT SOMETHING?
SURE. >> ALL MY LIFE, I HAVE TAKEN
SURE. >> ALL MY LIFE, I HAVE
TAKEN PERFECT CARE OF MY BODY.
ALL MY LIFE, I HAVE TAKEN PERFECT
CARE OF MY BODY. I EXERCISE EVERY DAY.
PERFECT CARE OF MY BODY. I EXERCISE
EVERY DAY. I RUN 30 MILES A WEEK.
I EXERCISE EVERY DAY. I RUN 30 MILES A
WEEK. I WORK OUT WITH WEIGHTS, AND I
I RUN 30 MILES A WEEK. I WORK OUT WITH
WEIGHTS, AND I HAVEN'T EATEN A PIECE OF MEAT,
I WORK OUT WITH WEIGHTS, AND I HAVEN'T EATEN
A PIECE OF MEAT, CHICKEN, OR FISH FOR 7 YEARS.
HAVEN'T EATEN A PIECE OF MEAT, CHICKEN, OR
FISH FOR 7 YEARS. >> YOU DO EAT SOMETHING?
CHICKEN, OR FISH FOR 7 YEARS. >> YOU
DO EAT SOMETHING? >> WELL, ONLY PURE,
YOU DO EAT SOMETHING? >>
WELL, ONLY PURE, NATURAL FOODS.
WELL, ONLY PURE, NATURAL
FOODS. BUT LAST WEEK I WAS OUT JUST
NATURAL FOODS. BUT LAST WEEK I WAS
OUT JUST WALKING DOWN THE STREET, AND I
BUT LAST WEEK I WAS OUT JUST WALKING DOWN THE
STREET, AND I SUDDENLY FOUND MYSELF IN FRONT
WALKING DOWN THE STREET, AND I SUDDENLY FOUND
MYSELF IN FRONT OF A HOTDOG STAND ORDERING
SUDDENLY FOUND MYSELF IN FRONT OF A HOTDOG
STAND ORDERING A JUMBO FRANK WITH KETCHUP AND
OF A HOTDOG STAND ORDERING A JUMBO FRANK WITH
KETCHUP AND RELISH AND MUSTARD, THE WORKS.
A JUMBO FRANK WITH KETCHUP AND
RELISH AND MUSTARD, THE WORKS. ME!
RELISH AND MUSTARD, THE
WORKS. ME! I'VE BEEN A VEGETARIAN
ME! I'VE BEEN A
VEGETARIAN FOR 7 YEARS.
I'VE BEEN A VEGETARIAN FOR 7
YEARS. >> WHO ATE THE HOTDOG?
FOR 7 YEARS. >> WHO ATE
THE HOTDOG? >> WELL, I DID.
WHO ATE THE HOTDOG? >> WELL, I
DID. BUT IT WASN'T FOR ME, DOCTOR,
WELL, I DID. BUT IT WASN'T FOR ME,
DOCTOR, THE BABY WANTED THE HOTDOG.
BUT IT WASN'T FOR ME, DOCTOR, THE BABY WANTED
THE HOTDOG. >> THE BABY WANTED THE HOTDOG?
THE BABY WANTED THE HOTDOG. >> THE
BABY WANTED THE HOTDOG? >> MM-HMM.
THE BABY WANTED THE HOTDOG?
MM-HMM. THE BABY MADE ME EAT IT.
MM-HMM. THE BABY MADE
ME EAT IT. >> RIGHT, THE BABY.
THE BABY MADE ME EAT IT. >>
RIGHT, THE BABY. >> AND THAT'S JUST
RIGHT, THE BABY. >> AND
THAT'S JUST THE BEGINNING.
AND THAT'S JUST THE BEGINNING.
THIS BABY WANTS WAFFLES
THE BEGINNING. THIS BABY WANTS
WAFFLES WITH SYRUP AND ICE CREAM
THIS BABY WANTS WAFFLES WITH SYRUP
AND ICE CREAM AND HOT FUDGE SAUCE.
WITH SYRUP AND ICE CREAM AND HOT
FUDGE SAUCE. >> IT'S ALL RIGHT, IT'S OKAY.
AND HOT FUDGE SAUCE. >> IT'S ALL RIGHT,
IT'S OKAY. YOU CAN EAT THAT AS LONG AS YOU
IT'S ALL RIGHT, IT'S OKAY. YOU CAN EAT
THAT AS LONG AS YOU HAVE A SENSIBLE DIET.
YOU CAN EAT THAT AS LONG AS YOU HAVE
A SENSIBLE DIET. >> THE BABY WON'T LET ME.
HAVE A SENSIBLE DIET. >> THE BABY
WON'T LET ME. HE HATES BROCCOLI.
THE BABY WON'T LET ME. HE HATES
BROCCOLI. HE WON'T TOUCH TURNIPS.
HE HATES BROCCOLI. HE WON'T
TOUCH TURNIPS. I SHOW HIM A SPOONFUL
HE WON'T TOUCH TURNIPS. I SHOW HIM A
SPOONFUL OF WHEAT GERM, HE SENDS ME OUT
I SHOW HIM A SPOONFUL OF WHEAT GERM, HE
SENDS ME OUT FOR A TRIPLE DECKER BURGER
OF WHEAT GERM, HE SENDS ME OUT FOR A
TRIPLE DECKER BURGER WITH DOUBLE FRIES
FOR A TRIPLE DECKER BURGER WITH
DOUBLE FRIES AND A CHOCOLATE MALT.
WITH DOUBLE FRIES AND A CHOCOLATE
MALT. >> THE BABY SENDS YOU OUT?
AND A CHOCOLATE MALT. >>
THE BABY SENDS YOU OUT? >> YES.
THE BABY SENDS YOU
OUT? >> YES. [LAUGHING]
YES. [LAUGHING] >>
YOU HAVE BEEN PREGNANT
[LAUGHING] >> YOU HAVE
BEEN PREGNANT 3 MONTHS?
YOU HAVE BEEN
PREGNANT 3 MONTHS? >> YES.
3 MONTHS? >> YES. >> THE
BABY DOESN'T EVEN HAVE
YES. >> THE BABY DOESN'T
EVEN HAVE A FACE YET.
THE BABY DOESN'T EVEN HAVE A
FACE YET. MRS. JENNINGS, YOU SAY TO ME IT
A FACE YET. MRS. JENNINGS, YOU SAY
TO ME IT SPEAKS ENGLISH AND KNOWS
MRS. JENNINGS, YOU SAY TO ME IT SPEAKS
ENGLISH AND KNOWS EXACTLY WHERE THE HAMBURGER
SPEAKS ENGLISH AND KNOWS EXACTLY
WHERE THE HAMBURGER PLACE IS.
EXACTLY WHERE THE HAMBURGER
PLACE IS. >> DOCTOR, I DON'T WANT
PLACE IS. >> DOCTOR, I
DON'T WANT A HAMBURGER.
DOCTOR, I DON'T WANT A
HAMBURGER. >> HA, HA, HA, YES, YOU DO.
A HAMBURGER. >> HA, HA, HA, YES,
YOU DO. >> NO, I CAN'T, I SHOULDN'T.
HA, HA, HA, YES, YOU DO. >> NO,
I CAN'T, I SHOULDN'T. >> IT'S OKAY.
NO, I CAN'T, I SHOULDN'T.
IT'S OKAY. >> IT IS?
IT'S OKAY. >> IT IS?
SURE, AS LONG AS YOU
IT IS? >> SURE, AS LONG AS YOU
HAVE A SENSIBLE BALANCED DIET,
SURE, AS LONG AS YOU HAVE A
SENSIBLE BALANCED DIET, HAVE A HAMBURGER.
HAVE A SENSIBLE BALANCED DIET,
HAVE A HAMBURGER. IT WON'T HURT YOU.
HAVE A HAMBURGER. IT WON'T
HURT YOU. >> DOCTOR, I HAVE SOME
IT WON'T HURT YOU. >> DOCTOR, I HAVE
SOME CHOCOLATE MARSHMALLOW COOKIES
DOCTOR, I HAVE SOME CHOCOLATE MARSHMALLOW
COOKIES THAT ARE OUT OF THIS WORLD.
CHOCOLATE MARSHMALLOW COOKIES THAT ARE OUT
OF THIS WORLD. WOULD YOU LIKE TO TRY ONE?
THAT ARE OUT OF THIS WORLD. WOULD YOU LIKE
TO TRY ONE? >> NO, I DON'T WANT TO DEPRIVE
WOULD YOU LIKE TO TRY ONE? >>
NO, I DON'T WANT TO DEPRIVE THE BABY.
NO, I DON'T WANT TO
DEPRIVE THE BABY. >> THANK YOU.
THE BABY. >> THANK
YOU. [TELEPHONE BUZZING]
THANK YOU. [TELEPHONE
BUZZING] >> JUST A SECOND.
[TELEPHONE BUZZING]
JUST A SECOND. HELLO.
JUST A SECOND. HELLO. YES.
HELLO. YES. JUST HAVE
TO MAKE SOME PLANS
YES. JUST HAVE TO MAKE SOME
PLANS FOR TONIGHT IF THAT'S ALL RIGHT.
JUST HAVE TO MAKE SOME PLANS FOR TONIGHT IF
THAT'S ALL RIGHT. HELLO, MR. BRENNER, I WANT TO
FOR TONIGHT IF THAT'S ALL RIGHT. HELLO,
MR. BRENNER, I WANT TO TREAT MY WIFE TO A WONDERFUL
HELLO, MR. BRENNER, I WANT TO TREAT MY WIFE
TO A WONDERFUL NIGHT IN YOUR HOTEL, BIG SUITE,
TREAT MY WIFE TO A WONDERFUL NIGHT IN YOUR
HOTEL, BIG SUITE, FIRST CLASS, EVERYTHING.
NIGHT IN YOUR HOTEL, BIG SUITE, FIRST CLASS,
EVERYTHING. NOPE, I'LL PAY FOR IT MYSELF.
FIRST CLASS, EVERYTHING. NOPE, I'LL PAY
FOR IT MYSELF. MR. BRENNER, I'M NOT COMING
NOPE, I'LL PAY FOR IT MYSELF. MR. BRENNER,
I'M NOT COMING TO YOUR HOTEL UNLESS I PAY
MR. BRENNER, I'M NOT COMING TO
YOUR HOTEL UNLESS I PAY THE BILL.
TO YOUR HOTEL UNLESS
I PAY THE BILL. RIGHT.
THE BILL. RIGHT. I JUST
WANT TO BE SURE THAT
RIGHT. I JUST WANT TO BE SURE
THAT EVERYTHING IS TAKEN CARE OF
I JUST WANT TO BE SURE THAT EVERYTHING
IS TAKEN CARE OF FIRST CLASS, ALL RIGHT?
EVERYTHING IS TAKEN CARE OF FIRST
CLASS, ALL RIGHT? THANK YOU, SIR.
FIRST CLASS, ALL RIGHT? THANK YOU,
SIR. AND GOOD NIGHT TO YOU, BYE-BYE.
THANK YOU, SIR. AND GOOD NIGHT TO
YOU, BYE-BYE. I'M GONNA HAVE TO GET
AND GOOD NIGHT TO YOU, BYE-BYE.
I'M GONNA HAVE TO GET A SECOND JOB.
I'M GONNA HAVE TO GET A SECOND
JOB. >> DOCTOR, THAT'S A WONDERFUL
A SECOND JOB. >> DOCTOR, THAT'S
A WONDERFUL THING YOU'RE DOING
DOCTOR, THAT'S A WONDERFUL
THING YOU'RE DOING FOR YOUR WIFE.
THING YOU'RE DOING FOR
YOUR WIFE. >> THANK YOU.
FOR YOUR WIFE. >> THANK
YOU. YOUR HUSBAND WILL DO IT
THANK YOU. YOUR HUSBAND
WILL DO IT FOR YOU SOMEDAY.
YOUR HUSBAND WILL DO IT FOR YOU
SOMEDAY. >> I CERTAINLY HOPE SO.
FOR YOU SOMEDAY. >> I CERTAINLY
HOPE SO. HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN
I CERTAINLY HOPE SO. HOW
LONG HAVE YOU BEEN MARRIED?
HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN
MARRIED? >> TWENTY-ONE YEARS.
MARRIED? >> TWENTY-ONE
YEARS. >> HOW MANY KIDS?
TWENTY-ONE YEARS. >> HOW
MANY KIDS? >> FOUR AT HOME AND ONE
HOW MANY KIDS? >> FOUR
AT HOME AND ONE IN COLLEGE.
FOUR AT HOME AND ONE
IN COLLEGE. >> FIVE CHILDREN,
IN COLLEGE. >> FIVE
CHILDREN, TWENTY-ONE YEARS.
FIVE CHILDREN, TWENTY-ONE
YEARS. WHAT ARE YOU CELEBRATING?
TWENTY-ONE YEARS. WHAT ARE
YOU CELEBRATING? >> SURVIVAL.
[MUSIC]
VANESSA, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
I'M WEARING IT TO THE DANCE TONIGHT.
I'M WEARING IT TO THE
DANCE TONIGHT. >> NICE.
TONIGHT. >> NICE.
WELL, WHAT IS IT,
NICE. >> WELL, WHAT
IS IT, A COSTUME PARTY?
WELL, WHAT IS IT, A COSTUME
PARTY? >> WHO ASKED YOU?
A COSTUME PARTY? >> WHO
ASKED YOU? >> FINE, LOOK LIKE THAT.
WHO ASKED YOU? >> FINE, LOOK
LIKE THAT. >> OKAY EVERYBODY, I WANT
FINE, LOOK LIKE THAT. >> OKAY
EVERYBODY, I WANT TO SEE YOU IN...
OKAY EVERYBODY, I WANT TO
SEE YOU IN... DENISE, GO SIT DOWN.
TO SEE YOU IN... DENISE, GO
SIT DOWN. >> MY NAILS ARE WET.
DENISE, GO SIT DOWN. >> MY NAILS ARE
WET. >> WELL, DON'T TOUCH THE COUCH.
MY NAILS ARE WET. >> WELL, DON'T
TOUCH THE COUCH. >> HELLO THERE,
WELL, DON'T TOUCH THE COUCH.
HELLO THERE, WHERE'S VANESSA?
HELLO THERE, WHERE'S
VANESSA? >> UPSTAIRS.
WHERE'S VANESSA? >>
UPSTAIRS. >> WILL YOU GO GET HER
UPSTAIRS. >> WILL YOU
GO GET HER FOR ME PLEASE?
WILL YOU GO GET HER
FOR ME PLEASE? >> OKAY.
FOR ME PLEASE? >>
OKAY. >> THANK YOU.
OKAY. >> THANK
YOU. HEY, LET HER GO.
THANK YOU. HEY, LET
HER GO. TURN THE TV OFF.
HEY, LET HER GO. TURN THE
TV OFF. >> OKAY, I'LL TURN
TURN THE TV OFF. >> OKAY,
I'LL TURN THE SOUND DOWN.
OKAY, I'LL TURN THE SOUND
DOWN. >> TURN OFF THE TV.
THE SOUND DOWN. >> TURN
OFF THE TV. >> COMPLETELY?
TURN OFF THE TV. >>
COMPLETELY? >> LATER ON, PULL IT OUT,
COMPLETELY? >> LATER ON,
PULL IT OUT, IT COMES BACK ON.
LATER ON, PULL IT OUT, IT
COMES BACK ON. TV'S WONDERFUL.
IT COMES BACK ON. TV'S
WONDERFUL. >> YES, DADDY?
TV'S WONDERFUL. >> YES,
DADDY? >> OH, WHERE'S RUDY?
YES, DADDY? >> OH, WHERE'S
RUDY? >> UPSTAIRS, I'LL GET HER.
OH, WHERE'S RUDY? >> UPSTAIRS,
I'LL GET HER. >> NO, DON'T GO GET HER,
UPSTAIRS, I'LL GET HER. >>
NO, DON'T GO GET HER, PLEASE.
NO, DON'T GO GET HER,
PLEASE. I'LL DEAL WITH WHAT I HAVE
PLEASE. I'LL DEAL
WITH WHAT I HAVE HERE.
I'LL DEAL WITH WHAT I HAVE HERE.
COME ON, COME SIT OVER HERE.
HERE. COME ON, COME SIT OVER
HERE. >> WELL, WHAT'S GOING ON?
COME ON, COME SIT OVER HERE. >> WELL, WHAT'S
GOING ON? >> YOUR MOTHER AND I ARE GOING
WELL, WHAT'S GOING ON? >> YOUR
MOTHER AND I ARE GOING OUT TONIGHT.
YOUR MOTHER AND I ARE
GOING OUT TONIGHT. >> HAVE FUN.
OUT TONIGHT. >> HAVE FUN.
NO, WHOA, WHOA PLEASE,
HAVE FUN. >> NO, WHOA, WHOA
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE.
NO, WHOA, WHOA PLEASE, PLEASE,
PLEASE, PLEASE. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE. THANK YOU
VERY MUCH. WE'RE GOING TO BE OUT LATE.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH. WE'RE
GOING TO BE OUT LATE. >> HOW LATE?
WE'RE GOING TO BE OUT LATE.
HOW LATE? >> TILL TOMORROW.
HOW LATE? >> TILL
TOMORROW. >> HAVE FUN.
TILL TOMORROW. >> HAVE FUN.
NO, NO, LISTEN THERE'S MORE.
HAVE FUN. >> NO, NO, LISTEN THERE'S
MORE. NOW DENISE, YOU ARE GOING
NO, NO, LISTEN THERE'S MORE. NOW
DENISE, YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE TO BABYSIT.
NOW DENISE, YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE
TO BABYSIT. >> DADDY, THAT'S NOT FAIR,
TO HAVE TO BABYSIT. >> DADDY,
THAT'S NOT FAIR, CANCELING MY PLANS
DADDY, THAT'S NOT FAIR, CANCELING
MY PLANS WITHOUT ANY WARNING.
CANCELING MY PLANS WITHOUT ANY
WARNING. >> YEAH, AND LOOK WHO YOU LEAVE
WITHOUT ANY WARNING. >> YEAH, AND LOOK
WHO YOU LEAVE IN CHARGE, THE DRAGON LADY.
YEAH, AND LOOK WHO YOU LEAVE IN CHARGE,
THE DRAGON LADY. >> CLIFF, I'M READY!
IN CHARGE, THE DRAGON LADY. >> CLIFF,
I'M READY! >> OKAY, HERE COMES YOUR MOM,
CLIFF, I'M READY! >> OKAY, HERE COMES
YOUR MOM, EVERYBODY, LINE UP, LINE UP.
OKAY, HERE COMES YOUR MOM, EVERYBODY,
LINE UP, LINE UP. >> OH, BOY, THIS MUST BE
EVERYBODY, LINE UP, LINE UP. >> OH, BOY,
THIS MUST BE SERIOUS, HE'S MAKING US LINE UP
OH, BOY, THIS MUST BE SERIOUS,
HE'S MAKING US LINE UP AGAIN.
SERIOUS, HE'S MAKING US LINE UP
AGAIN. >> WELL, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
AGAIN. >> WELL, WHAT DO YOU
THINK? >> DOESN'T MOM LOOK CLEAN?
WELL, WHAT DO YOU THINK? >> DOESN'T MOM
LOOK CLEAN? >> SAY GOOD-BYE TO YOUR MOTHER.
DOESN'T MOM LOOK CLEAN? >> SAY
GOOD-BYE TO YOUR MOTHER. >> GOOD-BYE.
SAY GOOD-BYE TO YOUR
MOTHER. >> GOOD-BYE. >> BYE, MOMMY.
GOOD-BYE. >> BYE, MOMMY.
NOW MRS. DAVIS IS GONNA
BYE, MOMMY. >> NOW MRS. DAVIS IS
GONNA SPEND THE NIGHT HERE TONIGHT AS
NOW MRS. DAVIS IS GONNA SPEND THE NIGHT HERE
TONIGHT AS SOON AS SHE GETS OFF FROM WORK.
SPEND THE NIGHT HERE TONIGHT AS SOON AS SHE
GETS OFF FROM WORK. AND I'M GOING TO LEAVE YOU
SOON AS SHE GETS OFF FROM WORK. AND I'M
GOING TO LEAVE YOU THE NUMBER FOR THE HOTEL.
AND I'M GOING TO LEAVE YOU THE NUMBER FOR
THE HOTEL. >> PLEASE, BEFORE YOU USE IT,
THE NUMBER FOR THE HOTEL. >>
PLEASE, BEFORE YOU USE IT, THINK.
PLEASE, BEFORE YOU USE IT,
THINK. AND THEN AFTER YOU MAKE YOUR
THINK. AND THEN AFTER YOU MAKE
YOUR DECISION, IF IT'S NECESSARY,
AND THEN AFTER YOU MAKE YOUR
DECISION, IF IT'S NECESSARY, THINK AGAIN.
DECISION, IF IT'S NECESSARY,
THINK AGAIN. ALL RIGHT, NOW DEAR.
THINK AGAIN. ALL RIGHT, NOW
DEAR. >> MOM, CAN WE SEND OUT
ALL RIGHT, NOW DEAR. >> MOM, CAN
WE SEND OUT FOR DINNER, OR DO I HAVE
MOM, CAN WE SEND OUT FOR
DINNER, OR DO I HAVE TO MAKE IT?
FOR DINNER, OR DO I HAVE TO
MAKE IT? >> DON'T ANSWER THAT!
TO MAKE IT? >> DON'T ANSWER
THAT! >> MOM, CAN I DO MY HOMEWORK
DON'T ANSWER THAT! >> MOM,
CAN I DO MY HOMEWORK AFTER DINNER?
MOM, CAN I DO MY HOMEWORK AFTER
DINNER? >> PAY NO ATTENTION TO THESE
AFTER DINNER? >> PAY NO
ATTENTION TO THESE PEOPLE.
PAY NO ATTENTION TO THESE
PEOPLE. >> MOM, WHAT ABOUT MY SCIENCE
PEOPLE. >> MOM, WHAT
ABOUT MY SCIENCE PROJECT?
MOM, WHAT ABOUT MY SCIENCE
PROJECT? YOU WANT ME TO DO IT ALL
PROJECT? YOU WANT ME
TO DO IT ALL BY MYSELF?
YOU WANT ME TO DO IT ALL
BY MYSELF? >> YOU ARE NOT
BY MYSELF? >> YOU ARE
NOT A MOTHER TONIGHT.
YOU ARE NOT A MOTHER
TONIGHT. >> GOOD-BYE, BABY.
A MOTHER TONIGHT. >> GOOD-BYE,
BABY. >> TAKE ME WITH YOU,
GOOD-BYE, BABY. >> TAKE
ME WITH YOU, I'LL BE GOOD.
TAKE ME WITH YOU, I'LL BE
GOOD. >> PAY NO ATTENTION TO THIS
I'LL BE GOOD. >> PAY NO
ATTENTION TO THIS CHILD.
PAY NO ATTENTION TO THIS CHILD.
HERE, CLAMP ON TO YOUR SISTER.
CHILD. HERE, CLAMP ON TO YOUR
SISTER. I HEREBY DECLARE THAT
HERE, CLAMP ON TO YOUR SISTER. I HEREBY
DECLARE THAT "YOU ARE NOT A MOTHER NIGHT"
I HEREBY DECLARE THAT "YOU ARE NOT A
MOTHER NIGHT" IS NOW BEGINNING AND LET
"YOU ARE NOT A MOTHER NIGHT" IS
NOW BEGINNING AND LET THE FUN START.
IS NOW BEGINNING AND LET THE
FUN START. >> YOU'RE STARTIN'
THE FUN START. >> YOU'RE
STARTIN' A LITTLE EARLY, AREN'T YOU?
[MUSIC]
[MUSIC]
WELL, THEN WHO WAS SHE DANCING
WITH? HEY, I THOUGHT THEY BROKE UP.
WAS SHE DANCING WITH? HEY, I
THOUGHT THEY BROKE UP. >> DENISE?
HEY, I THOUGHT THEY BROKE
UP. >> DENISE? >> HOLD ON.
DENISE? >> HOLD ON. WHAT?
HOLD ON. WHAT? >> CAN
I WATCH "FRANKENSTEIN?"
WHAT? >> CAN I WATCH "FRANKENSTEIN?"
DO YOU WANT TO WATCH IT?
CAN I WATCH "FRANKENSTEIN?"
DO YOU WANT TO WATCH IT? >> YES.
DO YOU WANT TO WATCH
IT? >> YES. >> SO, THEN WATCH IT.
YES. >> SO, THEN
WATCH IT. >> THAT WAS EASY.
SO, THEN WATCH IT. >> THAT WAS
EASY. >> THEY'RE SLOW DANCING NOW.
THAT WAS EASY. >> THEY'RE
SLOW DANCING NOW. >> DENISE?
THEY'RE SLOW DANCING NOW.
DENISE? >> HOLD ON, WHAT?
DENISE? >> HOLD ON, WHAT?
CAN I EAT THIS CUPCAKE?
HOLD ON, WHAT? >> CAN I EAT
THIS CUPCAKE? >> IT'S UP TO YOU.
CAN I EAT THIS CUPCAKE? >> IT'S
UP TO YOU. >> BUT I'VE ALREADY EATEN
IT'S UP TO YOU. >> BUT I'VE
ALREADY EATEN FOUR OF THEM.
BUT I'VE ALREADY EATEN
FOUR OF THEM. >> UP TO YOU.
FOUR OF THEM. >> UP
TO YOU. >> SHE DID?
UP TO YOU. >> SHE
DID? AND HE LET HER?
SHE DID? AND
HE LET HER? >> BYE.
AND HE LET HER?
BYE. >> HOLD ON.
BYE. >> HOLD ON.
WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
HOLD ON. WHERE ARE
YOU GOING? >> I'M HISTORY.
WHERE ARE YOU GOING? >> I'M
HISTORY. >> IF YOU WALK OUT THAT DOOR,
I'M HISTORY. >> IF YOU WALK OUT
THAT DOOR, I'M TELLING DADDY THAT YOU'VE
IF YOU WALK OUT THAT DOOR, I'M TELLING
DADDY THAT YOU'VE BEEN CUTTING OUT PICTURES
I'M TELLING DADDY THAT YOU'VE BEEN
CUTTING OUT PICTURES FROM HIS MEDICAL BOOKS
BEEN CUTTING OUT PICTURES FROM
HIS MEDICAL BOOKS AND SELLING THEM.
FROM HIS MEDICAL BOOKS AND
SELLING THEM. >> WELL, I'VE GOT STUFF
AND SELLING THEM. >> WELL, I'VE
GOT STUFF ON YOU TOO, YOU KNOW?
WELL, I'VE GOT STUFF ON YOU
TOO, YOU KNOW? >> LIKE WHAT?
ON YOU TOO, YOU KNOW? >>
LIKE WHAT? >> YOU WORRIED?
LIKE WHAT? >>
YOU WORRIED? >> NO.
YOU WORRIED? >> NO. >> GOOD.
TASTE THIS. >> I'M
FINE. >> COME ON, NOW.
I'M FINE. >> COME
ON, NOW. TASTE THIS.
COME ON, NOW. TASTE
THIS. >> CLIFF, THAT IS PIGEON.
TASTE THIS. >> CLIFF, THAT IS
PIGEON. >> WELL, LISTEN, THAT IS COW.
CLIFF, THAT IS PIGEON. >> WELL,
LISTEN, THAT IS COW. NOW TASTE THIS.
WELL, LISTEN, THAT IS COW. NOW
TASTE THIS. >> ALL I CAN THINK OF ARE
NOW TASTE THIS. >> ALL I CAN THINK
OF ARE THE PIGEONS ON THE LEDGE
ALL I CAN THINK OF ARE THE PIGEONS
ON THE LEDGE OUTSIDE MY OFFICE.
THE PIGEONS ON THE LEDGE OUTSIDE
MY OFFICE. >> THOSE ARE THE REJECTS.
OUTSIDE MY OFFICE. >> THOSE ARE THE
REJECTS. NOW THIS ONCE HAD A HEAD ON IT,
THOSE ARE THE REJECTS. NOW THIS ONCE HAD A
HEAD ON IT, LONG EYELASHES AND SAID, "MOO."
NOW THIS ONCE HAD A HEAD ON IT,
LONG EYELASHES AND SAID, "MOO." OKAY?
LONG EYELASHES AND SAID, "MOO."
OKAY? NOW, COME ON, JUST TAKE
OKAY? NOW, COME ON, JUST
TAKE A LITTLE BITE, PLEASE.
NOW, COME ON, JUST TAKE
A LITTLE BITE, PLEASE. HUH?
A LITTLE BITE, PLEASE.
HUH? HOW ABOUT IT?
HUH? HOW ABOUT
IT? >> IT'S NOT BAD.
HOW ABOUT IT? >> IT'S NOT BAD.
YEAH, WANT ANOTHER BITE?
IT'S NOT BAD. >> YEAH,
WANT ANOTHER BITE? >> NO.
YEAH, WANT ANOTHER BITE? >>
NO. >> COME ON, YOU KNOW YOU WANT
NO. >> COME ON, YOU
KNOW YOU WANT ANOTHER BITE.
COME ON, YOU KNOW YOU
WANT ANOTHER BITE. CLIFF, I DO NOT.
ANOTHER BITE. CLIFF, I DO
NOT. >> YOU ARE DYING FOR
CLIFF, I DO NOT. >> YOU ARE
DYING FOR ANOTHER BITE.
YOU ARE DYING FOR ANOTHER
BITE. >> I DO NOT WANT ANOTHER BITE.
ANOTHER BITE. >> I DO NOT
WANT ANOTHER BITE. >> OKAY.
WELL, MAY I HAVE SOME OF YOUR
STEAK? >> YOU DON'T LIKE YOURS?
OF YOUR STEAK? >> YOU DON'T
LIKE YOURS? >> WELL, THIS IS PIGEON.
YOU DON'T LIKE YOURS? >> WELL, THIS
IS PIGEON. >> I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU WENT
WELL, THIS IS PIGEON. >> I DON'T
KNOW WHY YOU WENT THROUGH ALL THAT.
I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU WENT THROUGH
ALL THAT. IF YOU WANTED A PIECE OF STEAK,
THROUGH ALL THAT. IF YOU WANTED A
PIECE OF STEAK, ALL YOU HAD TO DO IS ASK
IF YOU WANTED A PIECE OF STEAK,
ALL YOU HAD TO DO IS ASK FOR IT.
CLAIR, WHAT ARE YOU
DOING, DEAR? [LAUGHING]
DEAR? [LAUGHING] >>
I JUST HAD THE URGE
[LAUGHING] >> I JUST HAD THE
URGE TO CUT SOMEBODY'S MEAT.
I JUST HAD THE URGE TO CUT
SOMEBODY'S MEAT. >> I KNOW IT.
TO CUT SOMEBODY'S MEAT. >>
I KNOW IT. I KNOW THE FEELING.
I KNOW IT. I KNOW THE FEELING.
WE ARE VERY FORTUNATE
I KNOW THE FEELING. >> WE ARE VERY
FORTUNATE TO HAVE THE CHILDREN, CLIFF.
WE ARE VERY FORTUNATE TO HAVE THE CHILDREN,
CLIFF. OTHERWISE, WE WOULD NEVER KNOW
TO HAVE THE CHILDREN, CLIFF. OTHERWISE, WE
WOULD NEVER KNOW THE JOY OF LEAVING THEM
OTHERWISE, WE WOULD NEVER KNOW
THE JOY OF LEAVING THEM AT HOME.
THE JOY OF LEAVING THEM AT
HOME. >> LET'S NOT GO BACK.
AT HOME. >> LET'S NOT GO
BACK. >> YOU MEAN TOMORROW?
LET'S NOT GO BACK. >> YOU
MEAN TOMORROW? >> I MEAN FOREVER.
YOU MEAN TOMORROW? >> I
MEAN FOREVER. NO, I'M SERIOUS.
I MEAN FOREVER. NO, I'M
SERIOUS. LET 'EM HAVE THE HOUSE,
NO, I'M SERIOUS. LET 'EM HAVE
THE HOUSE, AND WE'LL STAY HERE.
LET 'EM HAVE THE HOUSE, AND WE'LL
STAY HERE. AND WHAT WE'LL DO IS MAYBE
AND WE'LL STAY HERE. AND WHAT WE'LL DO
IS MAYBE WE'LL CALL 'EM WHEN WE GET OLD.
AND WHAT WE'LL DO IS MAYBE WE'LL
CALL 'EM WHEN WE GET OLD. YES.
WE'LL CALL 'EM WHEN
WE GET OLD. YES. >> OH.
YES. >> OH. >> HMM?
OH. >> HMM? >> I
JUST HAD ANOTHER URGE.
HMM? >> I JUST HAD ANOTHER
URGE. >> WHAT YOU WANT TO TAKE
I JUST HAD ANOTHER URGE. >> WHAT YOU
WANT TO TAKE SOMEBODY TO THE BATHROOM?
WHAT YOU WANT TO TAKE SOMEBODY TO
THE BATHROOM? >> I HAVEN'T TOLD ANYBODY
SOMEBODY TO THE BATHROOM? >> I HAVEN'T
TOLD ANYBODY TO SHUT UP IN THE PAST HOUR.
I HAVEN'T TOLD ANYBODY TO SHUT UP IN
THE PAST HOUR. >> OH, GO AHEAD, TELL ME.
TO SHUT UP IN THE PAST HOUR. >> OH, GO
AHEAD, TELL ME. >> I DON'T WANT TO TELL YOU.
OH, GO AHEAD, TELL ME. >> I DON'T WANT
TO TELL YOU. >> NO, GO AHEAD, SAY IT TO ME.
I DON'T WANT TO TELL YOU. >> NO, GO AHEAD,
SAY IT TO ME. JUST SAY, "SHUT UP, CLIFF,
NO, GO AHEAD, SAY IT TO ME.
JUST SAY, "SHUT UP, CLIFF, SHUT UP."
JUST SAY, "SHUT UP, CLIFF, SHUT
UP." >> OH, CLIFF, I'M NOT GONNA
SHUT UP." >> OH, CLIFF, I'M NOT
GONNA TELL YOU TO SHUT UP.
OH, CLIFF, I'M NOT GONNA TELL
YOU TO SHUT UP. >> LISTEN, LET IT OUT.
TELL YOU TO SHUT UP. >> LISTEN, LET
IT OUT. IF YOU GOT A "SHUT UP" INSIDE
LISTEN, LET IT OUT. IF YOU GOT A
"SHUT UP" INSIDE TO MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER,
IF YOU GOT A "SHUT UP" INSIDE TO
MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER, JUST LET IT OUT.
TO MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER,
JUST LET IT OUT. "SHUT UP."
JUST LET IT OUT. "SHUT
UP." >> YOU ARE CRAZY.
"SHUT UP." >> YOU ARE CRAZY.
NO, NO, I'M NOT KIDDING.
YOU ARE CRAZY. >> NO, NO, I'M NOT
KIDDING. LOOK, WHICH ONE OF THE CHILDREN
NO, NO, I'M NOT KIDDING. LOOK,
WHICH ONE OF THE CHILDREN COULD I BE?
LOOK, WHICH ONE OF THE CHILDREN
COULD I BE? I KNOW, "OH, MOTHER,
COULD I BE? I KNOW, "OH,
MOTHER, THIS IS MY LIFE.
I KNOW, "OH, MOTHER, THIS IS MY
LIFE. YOU'RE SO OLD-FASHIONED."
THIS IS MY LIFE. YOU'RE SO
OLD-FASHIONED." >> SHUT UP.
YOU'RE SO OLD-FASHIONED." >> SHUT
UP. >> NOW, NOW, SEE, FELT GOOD,
SHUT UP. >> NOW, NOW,
SEE, FELT GOOD, DIDN'T IT?
NOW, NOW, SEE, FELT GOOD,
DIDN'T IT? NOW LET'S SEE, LET ME THINK
DIDN'T IT? NOW LET'S SEE,
LET ME THINK OF ANOTHER ONE.
NOW LET'S SEE, LET ME THINK OF
ANOTHER ONE. "MOM, RUDY'S BOTHERING ME."
OF ANOTHER ONE. "MOM, RUDY'S BOTHERING
ME." >> SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP.
"MOM, RUDY'S BOTHERING ME." >> SHUT UP, SHUT
UP, SHUT UP. >> SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP.
SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP. >>
SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP. [LAUGHING]
[MUSIC]
[TELEPHONE RINGING]
DR. HUXTABLE'S RESIDENCE. YES, I
SEE. WELL, HOW FAR APART ARE THEY?
YES, I SEE. WELL, HOW FAR
APART ARE THEY? AN HOUR?
WELL, HOW FAR APART ARE THEY?
AN HOUR? WELL, IT COULD BE A LOT
AN HOUR? WELL, IT COULD BE
A LOT OF THINGS, MRS. COLLINS,
WELL, IT COULD BE A LOT OF THINGS,
MRS. COLLINS, BUT I WOULDN'T DIAGNOSE IT
OF THINGS, MRS. COLLINS, BUT I
WOULDN'T DIAGNOSE IT AS LABOR PAINS.
BUT I WOULDN'T DIAGNOSE IT AS
LABOR PAINS. HAVE YOU EATEN ANYTHING
AS LABOR PAINS. HAVE YOU
EATEN ANYTHING UNUSUAL?
HAVE YOU EATEN ANYTHING
UNUSUAL? NO, THIS ISN'T THE DOCTOR.
UNUSUAL? NO, THIS ISN'T THE
DOCTOR. THIS IS HIS SON, THEO.
NO, THIS ISN'T THE DOCTOR. THIS IS HIS
SON, THEO. NO, HE'S GONE FOR THE EVENING.
THIS IS HIS SON, THEO. NO, HE'S GONE FOR
THE EVENING. DR. DALEY IS COVERING FOR HIM.
NO, HE'S GONE FOR THE EVENING. DR. DALEY IS
COVERING FOR HIM. I'LL GIVE YOU THE NUMBER.
DR. DALEY IS COVERING FOR HIM. I'LL
GIVE YOU THE NUMBER. I HEAR HE'S GOOD.
I'LL GIVE YOU THE NUMBER. I HEAR HE'S
GOOD. NO, BUT HE CAME OVER HERE ONCE
I HEAR HE'S GOOD. NO, BUT HE CAME OVER
HERE ONCE AND HE LOOKED PRETTY SMART.
NO, BUT HE CAME OVER HERE ONCE
AND HE LOOKED PRETTY SMART. 555-1639.
AND HE LOOKED PRETTY
SMART. 555-1639. THANK YOU!
555-1639. THANK YOU!
NO, I'M NOT GOING INTO
THANK YOU! NO, I'M NOT GOING
INTO MEDICINE, DAD WON'T LET ME.
NO, I'M NOT GOING INTO
MEDICINE, DAD WON'T LET ME. BYE.
[MUSIC]
CLIFF, WHAT... CLIFF. CLIFF.
HOW FAR APART ARE THEY?
CLIFF. >> HOW FAR APART ARE
THEY? >> OH, NOW HOW COULD YOU
HOW FAR APART ARE THEY? >>
OH, NOW HOW COULD YOU DO THAT?
OH, NOW HOW COULD
YOU DO THAT? >> DO WHAT?
DO THAT? >> DO WHAT?
YOU WERE SLEEPING.
DO WHAT? >> YOU WERE
SLEEPING. >> CORRECTION, NAPPING.
YOU WERE SLEEPING. >> CORRECTION,
NAPPING. SLEEPING IS UNDER THE COVERS
CORRECTION, NAPPING. SLEEPING IS
UNDER THE COVERS AND DON'T COME OUT TILL
SLEEPING IS UNDER THE COVERS
AND DON'T COME OUT TILL MORNING.
AND DON'T COME OUT TILL MORNING.
NAPPING IS ON TOP OF THE COVERS
MORNING. NAPPING IS ON TOP OF
THE COVERS WHICH IS OVER NOW.
NAPPING IS ON TOP OF THE COVERS
WHICH IS OVER NOW. >> THIS IS YOUR IDEA
WHICH IS OVER NOW. >> THIS IS
YOUR IDEA OF A FUN EVENING?
THIS IS YOUR IDEA OF A FUN EVENING?
YOU COME UP HERE TO TAKE A NAP?
OF A FUN EVENING? YOU COME UP HERE TO
TAKE A NAP? >> NO, MY IDEA OF A FUN EVENING
YOU COME UP HERE TO TAKE A NAP? >> NO, MY
IDEA OF A FUN EVENING IS TO PUT MY PAJAMAS ON,
NO, MY IDEA OF A FUN EVENING IS TO PUT MY
PAJAMAS ON, GET IN THE BED AND WAIT 6 HOURS
IS TO PUT MY PAJAMAS ON, GET IN THE
BED AND WAIT 6 HOURS FOR MY WIFE TO COME
GET IN THE BED AND WAIT 6 HOURS FOR
MY WIFE TO COME OUT OF THE BATHROOM.
FOR MY WIFE TO COME OUT OF THE
BATHROOM. >> CLIFF, THAT BATHROOM IS
OUT OF THE BATHROOM. >> CLIFF,
THAT BATHROOM IS VERY NICE.
CLIFF, THAT BATHROOM
IS VERY NICE. IT'S NICER THAN
VERY NICE. IT'S NICER
THAN OUR LIVING ROOM.
IT'S NICER THAN OUR LIVING ROOM.
IT EVEN HAS A PHONE IN THERE.
OUR LIVING ROOM. IT EVEN HAS A
PHONE IN THERE. >> AND YOU CAN CALL
IT EVEN HAS A PHONE IN THERE. >> AND
YOU CAN CALL ALL THE OTHER BATHROOMS
AND YOU CAN CALL ALL THE
OTHER BATHROOMS IN THE HOTEL.
ALL THE OTHER BATHROOMS IN
THE HOTEL. IS THAT WHAT YOU DID?
IN THE HOTEL. IS THAT WHAT YOU
DID? >> I DIDN'T THINK YOU'D MIND
IS THAT WHAT YOU DID? >> I DIDN'T THINK
YOU'D MIND THE TIME IT TOOK ONCE YOU SAW
I DIDN'T THINK YOU'D MIND THE TIME IT
TOOK ONCE YOU SAW THE FINISHED PRODUCT.
THE TIME IT TOOK ONCE YOU SAW THE
FINISHED PRODUCT. >> YOU KNOW YOU'RE RIGHT.
THE FINISHED PRODUCT. >> YOU
KNOW YOU'RE RIGHT. LET'S GET IT ON.
YOU KNOW YOU'RE RIGHT.
LET'S GET IT ON. >> CLIFF.
LET'S GET IT ON. >> CLIFF.
DID YOU HAVE TO SAY THAT?
CLIFF. DID YOU HAVE
TO SAY THAT? >> SAY WHAT?
DID YOU HAVE TO SAY THAT?
SAY WHAT? WHAT DID I SAY?
SAY WHAT? WHAT DID
I SAY? >> LET'S GET IT ON.
WHAT DID I SAY? >> LET'S GET IT
ON. >> WELL, I MEAN IT SOUNDED GOOD
LET'S GET IT ON. >> WELL, I
MEAN IT SOUNDED GOOD TO ME.
WELL, I MEAN IT SOUNDED GOOD
TO ME. >> WELL, THAT'S NOT A VERY
TO ME. >> WELL, THAT'S
NOT A VERY ROMANTIC LINE.
WELL, THAT'S NOT A VERY ROMANTIC
LINE. >> I DIDN'T KNOW THIS WAS
ROMANTIC LINE. >> I DIDN'T
KNOW THIS WAS A SCRIPT.
I DIDN'T KNOW THIS WAS A SCRIPT.
I THOUGHT WE WERE SUPPOSED
A SCRIPT. I THOUGHT WE WERE
SUPPOSED TO MAKE IT UP AS WE GO ALONG.
I THOUGHT WE WERE SUPPOSED TO MAKE IT UP AS
WE GO ALONG. >> BUT YOU COULD TRY SOMETHING
TO MAKE IT UP AS WE GO ALONG. >> BUT YOU COULD
TRY SOMETHING LIKE, "YOU KNOW YOU LOOK REALLY
BUT YOU COULD TRY SOMETHING LIKE, "YOU KNOW
YOU LOOK REALLY BEAUTIFUL THIS EVENING."
LIKE, "YOU KNOW YOU LOOK REALLY
BEAUTIFUL THIS EVENING." >> SURE.
BEAUTIFUL THIS EVENING." >>
SURE. >> OKAY, SO WHY DON'T YOU
SURE. >> OKAY, SO
WHY DON'T YOU TRY THAT?
OKAY, SO WHY DON'T
YOU TRY THAT? >> NO.
TRY THAT? >> NO. >>
BUT IT'S VERY ROMANTIC.
NO. >> BUT IT'S VERY
ROMANTIC. >> YEAH, IT'S ROMANTIC IF
BUT IT'S VERY ROMANTIC. >>
YEAH, IT'S ROMANTIC IF I SAY IT.
YEAH, IT'S ROMANTIC IF I
SAY IT. BUT IT ISN'T ROMANTIC
I SAY IT. BUT IT ISN'T ROMANTIC
IF YOU TELL ME TO SAY IT.
BUT IT ISN'T ROMANTIC IF YOU TELL ME
TO SAY IT. >> WELL, I WAS JUST TRYING
IF YOU TELL ME TO SAY IT. >>
WELL, I WAS JUST TRYING TO HELP.
WELL, I WAS JUST TRYING TO
HELP. >> WELL, BUT I DON'T NEED
TO HELP. >> WELL, BUT I
DON'T NEED YOUR HELP.
WELL, BUT I DON'T NEED
YOUR HELP. >> SO WHAT DO I DO?
YOUR HELP. >> SO WHAT
DO I DO? >> YOU LET ME SAY
SO WHAT DO I DO? >> YOU
LET ME SAY WHAT I WANT TO SAY.
YOU LET ME SAY WHAT I WANT
TO SAY. >> IF I LET YOU SAY IT YOU ARE
WHAT I WANT TO SAY. >> IF I LET YOU SAY
IT YOU ARE GONNA SAY, "LET'S GET IT ON."
IF I LET YOU SAY IT YOU ARE GONNA
SAY, "LET'S GET IT ON." >> NO, NO, NO, NO,
GONNA SAY, "LET'S GET IT ON."
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO,
NO. "LET'S GET IT ON" IS RETIRED.
NO, NO, NO, NO. "LET'S GET IT
ON" IS RETIRED. THAT'S FINISHED.
"LET'S GET IT ON" IS RETIRED.
THAT'S FINISHED. OKAY?
THAT'S FINISHED. OKAY? >> OKAY.
OKAY? >> OKAY. >> ALL RIGHT.
YOU LIKE THAT? >>
MM-HMM. >> I MADE THAT UP.
HOW'S THAT FEEL? >> IT'S
PRETTY NICE. >> MADE THAT UP TOO.
IT'S PRETTY NICE. >> MADE THAT
UP TOO. AND I'M MAKING UP SOME MORE
MADE THAT UP TOO. AND I'M
MAKING UP SOME MORE AS I GO ALONG.
AND I'M MAKING UP SOME MORE AS I GO
ALONG. NOW PAY CLOSE ATTENTION NOW.
AS I GO ALONG. NOW PAY
CLOSE ATTENTION NOW. WHAAA.
NOW PAY CLOSE ATTENTION
NOW. WHAAA. >> MORE, MORE.
WHAAA. >> MORE, MORE. >>
NO, NO, NO, NO, WAIT, WAIT.
MORE, MORE. >> NO, NO, NO, NO,
WAIT, WAIT. NOW YOU CAN'T RUSH ME.
YOU KNOW SOMETHIN'? I LOVE YOU VERY,
VERY MUCH. IT'S A PRIVILEGE TO WAKE UP IN
I LOVE YOU VERY, VERY MUCH. IT'S A PRIVILEGE
TO WAKE UP IN THE MORNING AND SEE YOUR FACE.
IT'S A PRIVILEGE TO WAKE UP IN THE MORNING
AND SEE YOUR FACE. YOU ARE MY LIFE, AND I MEAN
THE MORNING AND SEE YOUR FACE.
YOU ARE MY LIFE, AND I MEAN THAT.
YOU ARE MY LIFE, AND I
MEAN THAT. >> OH, CLIFF.
THAT. >> OH, CLIFF.
LET'S GET IT ON.
I, I AM THE ONE WHO'S SUPPOSED TO
SAY THAT. >> YES DEAR, BUT YOU SAID IT
SUPPOSED TO SAY THAT. >> YES
DEAR, BUT YOU SAID IT TOO SOON.
YES DEAR, BUT YOU
SAID IT TOO SOON. >> I SEE.
TOO SOON. >> I SEE.
SO IT'S TIMING, RIGHT?
I SEE. SO IT'S
TIMING, RIGHT? TIMING.
SO IT'S TIMING, RIGHT?
TIMING. ALL RIGHT.
TIMING. ALL RIGHT. OH...
ALL RIGHT. OH...
[TELEPHONE RINGING]
HELLO. THIS BETTER BE
NECESSARY. IT'S FOR YOU.
THIS BETTER BE NECESSARY.
IT'S FOR YOU. >> HELLO.
IT'S FOR YOU. >> HELLO.
GOOD NIGHT, MOM!
HELLO. >> GOOD NIGHT,
MOM! AND DON'T COME HOME
GOOD NIGHT, MOM! AND DON'T
COME HOME WITH ANOTHER BABY!
[MUSIC]
NOW YOU REALIZE THAT ONCE YOU
STEP INSIDE IT'S ALL OVER. >> I'M READY.
YOU STEP INSIDE IT'S ALL OVER.
I'M READY. >> YOU LOOSE?
I'M READY. >> YOU
LOOSE? >> I'M LOOSE.
YOU LOOSE? >> I'M
LOOSE. >> YOU WANT TO TAKE
I'M LOOSE. >> YOU WANT
TO TAKE A JOG AROUND?
YOU WANT TO TAKE A JOG
AROUND? >> COME ON, CLIFF,
A JOG AROUND? >> COME
ON, CLIFF, I MISS THE KIDS.
COME ON, CLIFF, I MISS
THE KIDS. >> ALL RIGHT.
I MISS THE KIDS. >> ALL RIGHT.
MOM, I'M GLAD YOU'RE HOME.
ALL RIGHT. >> MOM, I'M
GLAD YOU'RE HOME. >> OH, RUDY.
MOM, I'M GLAD YOU'RE HOME. >> OH,
RUDY. >> NOW WATCH IT, THERE MAY BE
OH, RUDY. >> NOW WATCH
IT, THERE MAY BE A TRAP.
NOW WATCH IT, THERE MAY
BE A TRAP. [DISHES BREAKING]
A TRAP. [DISHES BREAKING]
THAT WAS MY MUG!
[DISHES BREAKING] >> THAT WAS MY
MUG! >> HEY, YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE LEFT
THAT WAS MY MUG! >> HEY,
YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE LEFT IT THERE.
HEY, YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE LEFT
IT THERE. >> YOU'RE CLEANING IT UP.
IT THERE. >> YOU'RE CLEANING
IT UP. >> IT WAS YOUR MUG.
YOU'RE CLEANING IT UP. >>
IT WAS YOUR MUG. >> SHUT UP!
IT WAS YOUR MUG. >>
SHUT UP! >> IT'S BEEN LIKE THIS
SHUT UP! >> IT'S BEEN
LIKE THIS ALL MORNING.
IT'S BEEN LIKE THIS ALL
MORNING. >> I'M CALLING MOM.
ALL MORNING. >> I'M CALLING
MOM. >> YOU BETTER NOT.
I'M CALLING MOM. >> YOU BETTER
NOT. >> MOM, DO YOU KNOW WHAT
YOU BETTER NOT. >> MOM,
DO YOU KNOW WHAT HE DID?
MOM, DO YOU KNOW
WHAT HE DID? HE BROKE...
HE DID? HE BROKE... >> I DID NOT!
HE BROKE... >> I
DID NOT! I DID NOT!
I DID NOT! I DID
NOT! >> HOLD IT.
I DID NOT! >> HOLD IT. HOLD IT!
HOLD IT. HOLD IT!
WHY DON'T YOU ALL STOP?
HOLD IT! WHY DON'T YOU ALL
STOP? YOUR MOTHER AND I ARE JUST
WHY DON'T YOU ALL STOP? YOUR MOTHER
AND I ARE JUST COMING BACK FROM A LOVELY
YOUR MOTHER AND I ARE JUST
COMING BACK FROM A LOVELY NIGHT OUT.
COMING BACK FROM A LOVELY
NIGHT OUT. WE WALK IN HERE,
NIGHT OUT. WE WALK IN
HERE, AND WHAT DO WE SEE?
WE WALK IN HERE, AND WHAT DO WE
SEE? THE ATTACK OF THE ANT PEOPLE.
AND WHAT DO WE SEE? THE ATTACK
OF THE ANT PEOPLE. SIT DOWN.
THE ATTACK OF THE ANT PEOPLE.
SIT DOWN. NOW, I WANT ALL OF YOU
SIT DOWN. NOW, I WANT
ALL OF YOU TO JUST RELAX.
NOW, I WANT ALL OF YOU TO JUST
RELAX. YOU'RE MAKING YOUR MOTHER'S
TO JUST RELAX. YOU'RE MAKING
YOUR MOTHER'S FACE DO LIKE THIS...
YOU'RE MAKING YOUR MOTHER'S FACE DO
LIKE THIS... AND IF SHE CONTINUES TO LOOK
FACE DO LIKE THIS... AND IF SHE CONTINUES
TO LOOK LIKE THIS, YOU'RE GOING TO GROW
AND IF SHE CONTINUES TO LOOK LIKE THIS, YOU'RE
GOING TO GROW OLDER, GET MARRIED, AND SHE'LL
LIKE THIS, YOU'RE GOING TO GROW OLDER, GET
MARRIED, AND SHE'LL SHOW UP AT YOUR WEDDING
OLDER, GET MARRIED, AND SHE'LL SHOW
UP AT YOUR WEDDING LOOKING LIKE THIS...
SHOW UP AT YOUR WEDDING LOOKING
LIKE THIS... DO YOU WANT YOUR MOTHER
LOOKING LIKE THIS... DO YOU WANT
YOUR MOTHER TO LOOK LIKE THIS FOREVER?
DO YOU WANT YOUR MOTHER TO
LOOK LIKE THIS FOREVER? >> NO.
TO LOOK LIKE THIS FOREVER?
NO. >> THEN I WANT YOU TO GO
NO. >> THEN I WANT YOU TO
GO INTO THE KITCHEN AND CLEAN
THEN I WANT YOU TO GO INTO THE
KITCHEN AND CLEAN IT UP TOGETHER.
INTO THE KITCHEN AND CLEAN
IT UP TOGETHER. >> ME TOO?
IT UP TOGETHER. >> ME
TOO? >> WATCH AND LEARN.
CLAIR, I'M SORRY. I KNOW YOU
PROBABLY WANT ONE MORE DAY, DON'T YOU?
I KNOW YOU PROBABLY WANT ONE MORE
DAY, DON'T YOU? >> OH, NO, LAST NIGHT WAS
ONE MORE DAY, DON'T YOU? >> OH,
NO, LAST NIGHT WAS JUST ENOUGH.
OH, NO, LAST NIGHT WAS JUST
ENOUGH. >> I THINK YOU COULD HAVE USED
JUST ENOUGH. >> I THINK YOU COULD
HAVE USED THE WHOLE WEEKEND.
I THINK YOU COULD HAVE USED THE WHOLE
WEEKEND. >> NO, REALLY, LAST NIGHT WAS
THE WHOLE WEEKEND. >> NO, REALLY, LAST
NIGHT WAS JUST PERFECT WITH THE FOOD
NO, REALLY, LAST NIGHT WAS JUST PERFECT
WITH THE FOOD AND THE WINE AND THE PASSION.
JUST PERFECT WITH THE FOOD AND THE WINE
AND THE PASSION. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO WANTS
AND THE WINE AND THE PASSION. YOU'RE
THE ONE WHO WANTS THE WHOLE WEEKEND.
YOU'RE THE ONE WHO WANTS
THE WHOLE WEEKEND. >> NO.
THE WHOLE WEEKEND. >>
NO. COULD'VE USED A MONTH.
NO. COULD'VE
USED A MONTH. [MUSIC]
[MUSIC]
"THE COSBY SHOW" IS TAPED IN
FRONT OF A LIVE STUDIO AUDIENCE.
[MUSIC]
RUDY, COME ON! YOU'RE
GONNA MAKE US LATE. >> BYE, RUDY.
YOU'RE GONNA MAKE US LATE. >>
BYE, RUDY. I'M GONNA MISS YOU ALL DAY.
BYE, RUDY. I'M GONNA MISS
YOU ALL DAY. >> MAYBE I SHOULD GO
I'M GONNA MISS YOU ALL DAY. >> MAYBE
I SHOULD GO TO THE OFFICE WITH YOU.
MAYBE I SHOULD GO TO THE OFFICE
WITH YOU. >> NO, YOU GO TO SCHOOL,
TO THE OFFICE WITH YOU. >> NO, YOU
GO TO SCHOOL, AND I'LL GO TO THE OFFICE.
NO, YOU GO TO SCHOOL, AND I'LL GO TO
THE OFFICE. >> YOU SURE YOU'LL BE OKAY?
AND I'LL GO TO THE OFFICE. >> YOU
SURE YOU'LL BE OKAY? >> I'LL MAKE IT.
YOU SURE YOU'LL BE OKAY? >> I'LL
MAKE IT. >> YOU KNOW, I WORRY ABOUT YOU
I'LL MAKE IT. >> YOU KNOW, I
WORRY ABOUT YOU SOMETIMES.
YOU KNOW, I WORRY ABOUT
YOU SOMETIMES. >> BYE, BABY.
SOMETIMES. >> BYE,
BABY. I'LL SEE YOU LATER
BYE, BABY. I'LL SEE YOU
LATER THIS AFTERNOON.
RUDY! RUDY! RUDY, YOUR LUNCH!
RUDY! RUDY, YOUR LUNCH! RUDY!
SOMEBODY MUST HAVE RUN
OUTSIDE NAKED.
CLAIR! YOU FORGOT YOUR
BRIEFCASE. I KNOW A LOT OF PEOPLE
YOU FORGOT YOUR BRIEFCASE. I KNOW A
LOT OF PEOPLE FORGOT THEIR BRIEFCASES,
I KNOW A LOT OF PEOPLE FORGOT THEIR
BRIEFCASES, WENT ON TO LIVE NORMAL LIVES.
FORGOT THEIR BRIEFCASES, WENT ON TO LIVE
NORMAL LIVES. >> DOES THIS MAKE SENSE TO YOU?
WENT ON TO LIVE NORMAL LIVES. >> DOES THIS
MAKE SENSE TO YOU? A WOMAN GRADUATES FROM
DOES THIS MAKE SENSE TO YOU? A WOMAN
GRADUATES FROM LAW SCHOOL SO SHE CAN RUN
A WOMAN GRADUATES FROM LAW SCHOOL SO
SHE CAN RUN 2 1/2 BLOCKS TO CHASE A CHILD
LAW SCHOOL SO SHE CAN RUN 2 1/2 BLOCKS
TO CHASE A CHILD WHO SAYS SHE DOES NOT LIKE
2 1/2 BLOCKS TO CHASE A CHILD WHO SAYS
SHE DOES NOT LIKE THE SANDWICH SHE MADE.
WHO SAYS SHE DOES NOT LIKE THE SANDWICH
SHE MADE. >> WHAT KIND OF SANDWICH
THE SANDWICH SHE MADE. >> WHAT
KIND OF SANDWICH DID YOU MAKE FOR HER?
WHAT KIND OF SANDWICH DID YOU
MAKE FOR HER? >> RUDY MADE THE SANDWICH
DID YOU MAKE FOR HER? >> RUDY
MADE THE SANDWICH FOR HERSELF.
RUDY MADE THE SANDWICH FOR
HERSELF. SHE SAID THAT TUNA AND PEANUT
FOR HERSELF. SHE SAID THAT TUNA
AND PEANUT BUTTER SOUNDED GREAT,
SHE SAID THAT TUNA AND PEANUT BUTTER
SOUNDED GREAT, BUT IT JUST DIDN'T LOOK GOOD
BUTTER SOUNDED GREAT, BUT IT JUST
DIDN'T LOOK GOOD BETWEEN THE BREAD.
BUT IT JUST DIDN'T LOOK GOOD
BETWEEN THE BREAD. >> I AGREE WITH HER.
BETWEEN THE BREAD. >> I AGREE
WITH HER. >> I LOVE MY WORK,
I AGREE WITH HER. >> I LOVE
MY WORK, AND I'M DOING GREAT.
I LOVE MY WORK, AND I'M DOING
GREAT. BUT THEN I COME HOME AND I HAVE
AND I'M DOING GREAT. BUT THEN I COME
HOME AND I HAVE TO HELP PEOPLE WHO PUT
BUT THEN I COME HOME AND I HAVE TO HELP
PEOPLE WHO PUT THEIR CLOTHES ON BACKWARDS.
TO HELP PEOPLE WHO PUT THEIR CLOTHES
ON BACKWARDS. OR THEY WANT A CAR,
THEIR CLOTHES ON BACKWARDS. OR THEY
WANT A CAR, BUT THEY DON'T KNOW HOW
OR THEY WANT A CAR, BUT
THEY DON'T KNOW HOW TO DRIVE.
BUT THEY DON'T KNOW HOW TO
DRIVE. OR THEY WANT TO WATCH
TO DRIVE. OR THEY WANT TO WATCH
TELEVISION ALL NIGHT LONG UNTIL
OR THEY WANT TO WATCH TELEVISION ALL NIGHT
LONG UNTIL THEIR EYEBALLS POP OUT OF THEIR
TELEVISION ALL NIGHT LONG UNTIL THEIR EYEBALLS
POP OUT OF THEIR SOCKETS AND ROLL UNDER
THEIR EYEBALLS POP OUT OF THEIR
SOCKETS AND ROLL UNDER THE COUCH.
SOCKETS AND ROLL UNDER THE
COUCH. >> THEN IT'S THE KIDS?
THE COUCH. >> THEN
IT'S THE KIDS? >> NO.
THEN IT'S THE
KIDS? >> NO. >> NO?
NO. >> NO? >> NO,
I WANTED TO HAVE
NO? >> NO, I WANTED
TO HAVE THE KIDS.
NO, I WANTED TO HAVE THE
KIDS. THAT'S IMPORTANT TO US.
THE KIDS. THAT'S IMPORTANT TO
US. BUT THEN I GO TO WORK AND I SIT
THAT'S IMPORTANT TO US. BUT THEN I GO
TO WORK AND I SIT AT THAT DESK FOR WEEKS,
BUT THEN I GO TO WORK AND I SIT AT THAT
DESK FOR WEEKS, FOR HOURS PREPARING A BRIEF
AT THAT DESK FOR WEEKS, FOR HOURS PREPARING
A BRIEF AND MR. GREENBOOK, SR., COMES IN
FOR HOURS PREPARING A BRIEF AND MR. GREENBOOK,
SR., COMES IN TO TELL ME THE CASE HAS BEEN
AND MR. GREENBOOK, SR., COMES IN TO TELL
ME THE CASE HAS BEEN SETTLED OUT OF COURT.
TO TELL ME THE CASE HAS BEEN
SETTLED OUT OF COURT. I WANT TO SCREAM.
SETTLED OUT OF COURT. I WANT
TO SCREAM. >> SO IT'S WORK?
I WANT TO SCREAM.
SO IT'S WORK? >> NO.
SO IT'S WORK? >> NO. >> NO?
NO. >> NO? >> NO.
NO? >> NO. >> NO?
NO. >> NO? >>
NO, I LOVE MY WORK.
NO? >> NO, I LOVE MY
WORK. I JUST TOLD YOU.
NO, I LOVE MY WORK. I
JUST TOLD YOU. >> I'M SORRY.
I JUST TOLD YOU. >> I'M SORRY.
BUT THEN I COME HOME AGAIN,
I'M SORRY. >> BUT THEN I COME
HOME AGAIN, PEOPLE ARE CRYING.
BUT THEN I COME HOME AGAIN, PEOPLE
ARE CRYING. THEY NEED A BUTTON SOWN ON,
PEOPLE ARE CRYING. THEY NEED A BUTTON
SOWN ON, SOMEBODY'S DRINKING BUBBLE
THEY NEED A BUTTON SOWN ON,
SOMEBODY'S DRINKING BUBBLE BATH.
SOMEBODY'S DRINKING BUBBLE
BATH. >> THEN IT IS THE KIDS.
BATH. >> THEN IT
IS THE KIDS. >> NO.
THEN IT IS THE KIDS. >>
NO. >> IT'S THE KIDS AND WORK.
NO. >> IT'S THE
KIDS AND WORK. >> NO.
IT'S THE KIDS AND
WORK. >> NO. >> THEN IT'S ME!
NO. >> THEN IT'S ME! >> NO.
THEN IT'S ME! >> NO.
WELL, THEN CLAIR,
NO. >> WELL, THEN
CLAIR, WHAT IS IT?
WELL, THEN CLAIR, WHAT IS
IT? >> WHAT IT IS, IS A LIFE THAT'S
WHAT IS IT? >> WHAT IT IS, IS A LIFE
THAT'S SO CROWDED I DON'T HAVE TIME
WHAT IT IS, IS A LIFE THAT'S SO CROWDED
I DON'T HAVE TIME TO FIGURE OUT WHAT IT IS,
SO CROWDED I DON'T HAVE TIME TO FIGURE OUT
WHAT IT IS, 'CAUSE I'M A BE LATE FOR WORK.
TO FIGURE OUT WHAT IT IS, 'CAUSE I'M A BE
LATE FOR WORK. >> OH, NOW THEN I CAN HELP.
'CAUSE I'M A BE LATE FOR WORK. >> OH,
NOW THEN I CAN HELP. NOW LISTEN TO ME.
OH, NOW THEN I CAN HELP. NOW
LISTEN TO ME. STOP, STOP, STOP, STOP, STOP.
NOW LISTEN TO ME. STOP, STOP,
STOP, STOP, STOP. LISTEN TO ME, OKAY?
STOP, STOP, STOP, STOP, STOP.
LISTEN TO ME, OKAY? JUST LISTEN TO ME.
LISTEN TO ME, OKAY? JUST
LISTEN TO ME. JUST TAKE IT EASY.
JUST LISTEN TO ME. JUST TAKE IT
EASY. TONIGHT YOU AND I GO TO DINNER.
JUST TAKE IT EASY. TONIGHT YOU AND I GO
TO DINNER. OUT TO DINNER JUST THE TWO
TONIGHT YOU AND I GO TO DINNER. OUT
TO DINNER JUST THE TWO OF US, OKAY?
OUT TO DINNER JUST THE TWO
OF US, OKAY? >> I'D LIKE THAT.
OF US, OKAY? >> I'D
LIKE THAT. >> GOOD.
I'D LIKE THAT. >> GOOD.
NOW HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE.
GOOD. NOW HERE, HERE, HERE,
HERE. THINK ABOUT THIS ONE HERE.
NOW HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE. THINK ABOUT
THIS ONE HERE. WE GO TO THE BILTMORE HOTEL
THINK ABOUT THIS ONE HERE. WE GO TO THE
BILTMORE HOTEL BECAUSE I KNOW THE MANAGER
WE GO TO THE BILTMORE HOTEL
BECAUSE I KNOW THE MANAGER THERE.
BECAUSE I KNOW THE MANAGER
THERE. I DELIVERED HIS BABY, AND HE
THERE. I DELIVERED HIS BABY, AND
HE OWES ME BECAUSE THE BABY DOES
I DELIVERED HIS BABY, AND HE OWES ME BECAUSE
THE BABY DOES NOT LOOK LIKE HIM OR HIS WIFE.
OWES ME BECAUSE THE BABY DOES NOT
LOOK LIKE HIM OR HIS WIFE. I'M SERIOUS.
NOT LOOK LIKE HIM OR HIS
WIFE. I'M SERIOUS. >> OKAY.
I'M SERIOUS. >> OKAY.
DINNER AT THE BILTMORE.
OKAY. DINNER AT THE BILTMORE.
DINNER AT THE BILTMORE.
DINNER AT THE BILTMORE. >>
DINNER AT THE BILTMORE. >> YEAH.
DINNER AT THE BILTMORE. >>
YEAH. >> WAIT, WHOA, NOW LISTEN.
YEAH. >> WAIT, WHOA, NOW
LISTEN. NO, NO, HEAR ME NOW.
WAIT, WHOA, NOW LISTEN. NO,
NO, HEAR ME NOW. HEAR ME NOW.
NO, NO, HEAR ME NOW. HEAR ME
NOW. WE RENT A LIMOUSINE, TAKE US
HEAR ME NOW. WE RENT A LIMOUSINE,
TAKE US DOWN TO THE BILTMORE FOR
WE RENT A LIMOUSINE, TAKE US DOWN TO THE
BILTMORE FOR THE DINNER AND THEN TAKE A NICE
DOWN TO THE BILTMORE FOR THE DINNER AND THEN
TAKE A NICE LIMO DRIVE ON THE RIVER WITH
THE DINNER AND THEN TAKE A NICE LIMO DRIVE
ON THE RIVER WITH THE MOON BOUNCING OFF
LIMO DRIVE ON THE RIVER WITH THE MOON
BOUNCING OFF OF THE WATER, AND YOU CAN SEE
THE MOON BOUNCING OFF OF THE WATER,
AND YOU CAN SEE LIGHTS OF THE BUILDINGS
OF THE WATER, AND YOU CAN SEE LIGHTS
OF THE BUILDINGS AND THE BOATS GOING.
LIGHTS OF THE BUILDINGS AND
THE BOATS GOING. >> THE BOATS?
AND THE BOATS GOING. >>
THE BOATS? >> THE BOATS.
THE BOATS? >> THE BOATS.
OH, THAT'S BEAUTIFUL.
THE BOATS. >> OH, THAT'S
BEAUTIFUL. >> YES, IT IS, ALL RIGHT?
OH, THAT'S BEAUTIFUL. >>
YES, IT IS, ALL RIGHT? >> OH.
YES, IT IS, ALL
RIGHT? >> OH. >> YEAH.
OH. >> YEAH.
THANKS, CLIFF.
YEAH. >> THANKS,
CLIFF. >> I'LL SEE YOU LATER.
THANKS, CLIFF. >> I'LL
SEE YOU LATER. >> YEAH.
I'LL SEE YOU LATER. >>
YEAH. OH, WAIT A MINUTE!
YEAH. OH, WAIT A MINUTE! I
GOT ONE MORE AND THIS IS IT.
OH, WAIT A MINUTE! I GOT ONE MORE
AND THIS IS IT. WE WILL STAY OVER
I GOT ONE MORE AND THIS IS IT. WE
WILL STAY OVER AT THE BILTMORE.
WE WILL STAY OVER AT THE BILTMORE.
WE'RE GONNA SPEND THE NIGHT?
AT THE BILTMORE. >> WE'RE GONNA
SPEND THE NIGHT? >> SPEND THE NIGHT
WE'RE GONNA SPEND THE NIGHT?
SPEND THE NIGHT AT THE BILTMORE.
SPEND THE NIGHT AT THE
BILTMORE. >> WITHOUT THE CHILDREN?
AT THE BILTMORE. >> WITHOUT THE
CHILDREN? >> WELL, DEAR, IF WE TAKE
WITHOUT THE CHILDREN? >> WELL, DEAR, IF
WE TAKE THE CHILDREN, WHY ARE WE GOING?
WELL, DEAR, IF WE TAKE THE CHILDREN,
WHY ARE WE GOING? TONIGHT WE ARE NOT TAKING
THE CHILDREN, WHY ARE WE GOING? TONIGHT WE
ARE NOT TAKING THE CHILDREN BECAUSE TONIGHT IS
TONIGHT WE ARE NOT TAKING THE CHILDREN BECAUSE
TONIGHT IS "YOU ARE NOT A MOTHER" NIGHT.
THE CHILDREN BECAUSE TONIGHT IS "YOU ARE NOT
A MOTHER" NIGHT. >> CLIFF, I THINK THAT'S
"YOU ARE NOT A MOTHER" NIGHT. >>
CLIFF, I THINK THAT'S A WONDERFUL IDEA.
CLIFF, I THINK THAT'S A
WONDERFUL IDEA. >> ALL RIGHT, GOOD.
A WONDERFUL IDEA. >> ALL
RIGHT, GOOD. YOU LIKE THAT, HUH?
ALL RIGHT, GOOD. YOU
LIKE THAT, HUH? >> I LIKE THAT.
YOU LIKE THAT, HUH? >> I LIKE
THAT. >> OKAY, NOW YOU'RE RELAXED
I LIKE THAT. >> OKAY,
NOW YOU'RE RELAXED NOW?
OKAY, NOW YOU'RE
RELAXED NOW? >> I'M RELAXED.
NOW? >> I'M RELAXED. >>
YOU FEEL MUCH BETTER?
I'M RELAXED. >> YOU FEEL MUCH
BETTER? >> I FEEL MUCH BETTER.
YOU FEEL MUCH BETTER? >> I FEEL
MUCH BETTER. >> AND YOU'RE KIND OF JUST
I FEEL MUCH BETTER. >> AND
YOU'RE KIND OF JUST SMOOTHED OUT.
AND YOU'RE KIND OF JUST
SMOOTHED OUT. >> I'M SMOOTHED OUT.
SMOOTHED OUT. >> I'M
SMOOTHED OUT. >> YES, THAT'S IT.
I'M SMOOTHED OUT. >> YES,
THAT'S IT. AND YOU'RE LATE FOR WORK.
YES, THAT'S IT. AND
YOU'RE LATE FOR WORK. >> OH.
[MUSIC]
SO MRS. JENNINGS, FOR A WOMAN
PREGNANT 3 MONTHS, YOU'RE ALL RIGHT.
FOR A WOMAN PREGNANT 3 MONTHS, YOU'RE ALL
RIGHT. >> DOCTOR, COULD I... UM, COULD I
YOU'RE ALL RIGHT. >> DOCTOR, COULD I...
UM, COULD I TALK TO YOU ABOUT SOMETHING?
DOCTOR, COULD I... UM, COULD I TALK
TO YOU ABOUT SOMETHING? >> SURE.
TALK TO YOU ABOUT SOMETHING?
SURE. >> ALL MY LIFE, I HAVE TAKEN
SURE. >> ALL MY LIFE, I HAVE
TAKEN PERFECT CARE OF MY BODY.
ALL MY LIFE, I HAVE TAKEN PERFECT
CARE OF MY BODY. I EXERCISE EVERY DAY.
PERFECT CARE OF MY BODY. I EXERCISE
EVERY DAY. I RUN 30 MILES A WEEK.
I EXERCISE EVERY DAY. I RUN 30 MILES A
WEEK. I WORK OUT WITH WEIGHTS, AND I
I RUN 30 MILES A WEEK. I WORK OUT WITH
WEIGHTS, AND I HAVEN'T EATEN A PIECE OF MEAT,
I WORK OUT WITH WEIGHTS, AND I HAVEN'T EATEN
A PIECE OF MEAT, CHICKEN, OR FISH FOR 7 YEARS.
HAVEN'T EATEN A PIECE OF MEAT, CHICKEN, OR
FISH FOR 7 YEARS. >> YOU DO EAT SOMETHING?
CHICKEN, OR FISH FOR 7 YEARS. >> YOU
DO EAT SOMETHING? >> WELL, ONLY PURE,
YOU DO EAT SOMETHING? >>
WELL, ONLY PURE, NATURAL FOODS.
WELL, ONLY PURE, NATURAL
FOODS. BUT LAST WEEK I WAS OUT JUST
NATURAL FOODS. BUT LAST WEEK I WAS
OUT JUST WALKING DOWN THE STREET, AND I
BUT LAST WEEK I WAS OUT JUST WALKING DOWN THE
STREET, AND I SUDDENLY FOUND MYSELF IN FRONT
WALKING DOWN THE STREET, AND I SUDDENLY FOUND
MYSELF IN FRONT OF A HOTDOG STAND ORDERING
SUDDENLY FOUND MYSELF IN FRONT OF A HOTDOG
STAND ORDERING A JUMBO FRANK WITH KETCHUP AND
OF A HOTDOG STAND ORDERING A JUMBO FRANK WITH
KETCHUP AND RELISH AND MUSTARD, THE WORKS.
A JUMBO FRANK WITH KETCHUP AND
RELISH AND MUSTARD, THE WORKS. ME!
RELISH AND MUSTARD, THE
WORKS. ME! I'VE BEEN A VEGETARIAN
ME! I'VE BEEN A
VEGETARIAN FOR 7 YEARS.
I'VE BEEN A VEGETARIAN FOR 7
YEARS. >> WHO ATE THE HOTDOG?
FOR 7 YEARS. >> WHO ATE
THE HOTDOG? >> WELL, I DID.
WHO ATE THE HOTDOG? >> WELL, I
DID. BUT IT WASN'T FOR ME, DOCTOR,
WELL, I DID. BUT IT WASN'T FOR ME,
DOCTOR, THE BABY WANTED THE HOTDOG.
BUT IT WASN'T FOR ME, DOCTOR, THE BABY WANTED
THE HOTDOG. >> THE BABY WANTED THE HOTDOG?
THE BABY WANTED THE HOTDOG. >> THE
BABY WANTED THE HOTDOG? >> MM-HMM.
THE BABY WANTED THE HOTDOG?
MM-HMM. THE BABY MADE ME EAT IT.
MM-HMM. THE BABY MADE
ME EAT IT. >> RIGHT, THE BABY.
THE BABY MADE ME EAT IT. >>
RIGHT, THE BABY. >> AND THAT'S JUST
RIGHT, THE BABY. >> AND
THAT'S JUST THE BEGINNING.
AND THAT'S JUST THE BEGINNING.
THIS BABY WANTS WAFFLES
THE BEGINNING. THIS BABY WANTS
WAFFLES WITH SYRUP AND ICE CREAM
THIS BABY WANTS WAFFLES WITH SYRUP
AND ICE CREAM AND HOT FUDGE SAUCE.
WITH SYRUP AND ICE CREAM AND HOT
FUDGE SAUCE. >> IT'S ALL RIGHT, IT'S OKAY.
AND HOT FUDGE SAUCE. >> IT'S ALL RIGHT,
IT'S OKAY. YOU CAN EAT THAT AS LONG AS YOU
IT'S ALL RIGHT, IT'S OKAY. YOU CAN EAT
THAT AS LONG AS YOU HAVE A SENSIBLE DIET.
YOU CAN EAT THAT AS LONG AS YOU HAVE
A SENSIBLE DIET. >> THE BABY WON'T LET ME.
HAVE A SENSIBLE DIET. >> THE BABY
WON'T LET ME. HE HATES BROCCOLI.
THE BABY WON'T LET ME. HE HATES
BROCCOLI. HE WON'T TOUCH TURNIPS.
HE HATES BROCCOLI. HE WON'T
TOUCH TURNIPS. I SHOW HIM A SPOONFUL
HE WON'T TOUCH TURNIPS. I SHOW HIM A
SPOONFUL OF WHEAT GERM, HE SENDS ME OUT
I SHOW HIM A SPOONFUL OF WHEAT GERM, HE
SENDS ME OUT FOR A TRIPLE DECKER BURGER
OF WHEAT GERM, HE SENDS ME OUT FOR A
TRIPLE DECKER BURGER WITH DOUBLE FRIES
FOR A TRIPLE DECKER BURGER WITH
DOUBLE FRIES AND A CHOCOLATE MALT.
WITH DOUBLE FRIES AND A CHOCOLATE
MALT. >> THE BABY SENDS YOU OUT?
AND A CHOCOLATE MALT. >>
THE BABY SENDS YOU OUT? >> YES.
THE BABY SENDS YOU
OUT? >> YES. [LAUGHING]
YES. [LAUGHING] >>
YOU HAVE BEEN PREGNANT
[LAUGHING] >> YOU HAVE
BEEN PREGNANT 3 MONTHS?
YOU HAVE BEEN
PREGNANT 3 MONTHS? >> YES.
3 MONTHS? >> YES. >> THE
BABY DOESN'T EVEN HAVE
YES. >> THE BABY DOESN'T
EVEN HAVE A FACE YET.
THE BABY DOESN'T EVEN HAVE A
FACE YET. MRS. JENNINGS, YOU SAY TO ME IT
A FACE YET. MRS. JENNINGS, YOU SAY
TO ME IT SPEAKS ENGLISH AND KNOWS
MRS. JENNINGS, YOU SAY TO ME IT SPEAKS
ENGLISH AND KNOWS EXACTLY WHERE THE HAMBURGER
SPEAKS ENGLISH AND KNOWS EXACTLY
WHERE THE HAMBURGER PLACE IS.
EXACTLY WHERE THE HAMBURGER
PLACE IS. >> DOCTOR, I DON'T WANT
PLACE IS. >> DOCTOR, I
DON'T WANT A HAMBURGER.
DOCTOR, I DON'T WANT A
HAMBURGER. >> HA, HA, HA, YES, YOU DO.
A HAMBURGER. >> HA, HA, HA, YES,
YOU DO. >> NO, I CAN'T, I SHOULDN'T.
HA, HA, HA, YES, YOU DO. >> NO,
I CAN'T, I SHOULDN'T. >> IT'S OKAY.
NO, I CAN'T, I SHOULDN'T.
IT'S OKAY. >> IT IS?
IT'S OKAY. >> IT IS?
SURE, AS LONG AS YOU
IT IS? >> SURE, AS LONG AS YOU
HAVE A SENSIBLE BALANCED DIET,
SURE, AS LONG AS YOU HAVE A
SENSIBLE BALANCED DIET, HAVE A HAMBURGER.
HAVE A SENSIBLE BALANCED DIET,
HAVE A HAMBURGER. IT WON'T HURT YOU.
HAVE A HAMBURGER. IT WON'T
HURT YOU. >> DOCTOR, I HAVE SOME
IT WON'T HURT YOU. >> DOCTOR, I HAVE
SOME CHOCOLATE MARSHMALLOW COOKIES
DOCTOR, I HAVE SOME CHOCOLATE MARSHMALLOW
COOKIES THAT ARE OUT OF THIS WORLD.
CHOCOLATE MARSHMALLOW COOKIES THAT ARE OUT
OF THIS WORLD. WOULD YOU LIKE TO TRY ONE?
THAT ARE OUT OF THIS WORLD. WOULD YOU LIKE
TO TRY ONE? >> NO, I DON'T WANT TO DEPRIVE
WOULD YOU LIKE TO TRY ONE? >>
NO, I DON'T WANT TO DEPRIVE THE BABY.
NO, I DON'T WANT TO
DEPRIVE THE BABY. >> THANK YOU.
THE BABY. >> THANK
YOU. [TELEPHONE BUZZING]
THANK YOU. [TELEPHONE
BUZZING] >> JUST A SECOND.
[TELEPHONE BUZZING]
JUST A SECOND. HELLO.
JUST A SECOND. HELLO. YES.
HELLO. YES. JUST HAVE
TO MAKE SOME PLANS
YES. JUST HAVE TO MAKE SOME
PLANS FOR TONIGHT IF THAT'S ALL RIGHT.
JUST HAVE TO MAKE SOME PLANS FOR TONIGHT IF
THAT'S ALL RIGHT. HELLO, MR. BRENNER, I WANT TO
FOR TONIGHT IF THAT'S ALL RIGHT. HELLO,
MR. BRENNER, I WANT TO TREAT MY WIFE TO A WONDERFUL
HELLO, MR. BRENNER, I WANT TO TREAT MY WIFE
TO A WONDERFUL NIGHT IN YOUR HOTEL, BIG SUITE,
TREAT MY WIFE TO A WONDERFUL NIGHT IN YOUR
HOTEL, BIG SUITE, FIRST CLASS, EVERYTHING.
NIGHT IN YOUR HOTEL, BIG SUITE, FIRST CLASS,
EVERYTHING. NOPE, I'LL PAY FOR IT MYSELF.
FIRST CLASS, EVERYTHING. NOPE, I'LL PAY
FOR IT MYSELF. MR. BRENNER, I'M NOT COMING
NOPE, I'LL PAY FOR IT MYSELF. MR. BRENNER,
I'M NOT COMING TO YOUR HOTEL UNLESS I PAY
MR. BRENNER, I'M NOT COMING TO
YOUR HOTEL UNLESS I PAY THE BILL.
TO YOUR HOTEL UNLESS
I PAY THE BILL. RIGHT.
THE BILL. RIGHT. I JUST
WANT TO BE SURE THAT
RIGHT. I JUST WANT TO BE SURE
THAT EVERYTHING IS TAKEN CARE OF
I JUST WANT TO BE SURE THAT EVERYTHING
IS TAKEN CARE OF FIRST CLASS, ALL RIGHT?
EVERYTHING IS TAKEN CARE OF FIRST
CLASS, ALL RIGHT? THANK YOU, SIR.
FIRST CLASS, ALL RIGHT? THANK YOU,
SIR. AND GOOD NIGHT TO YOU, BYE-BYE.
THANK YOU, SIR. AND GOOD NIGHT TO
YOU, BYE-BYE. I'M GONNA HAVE TO GET
AND GOOD NIGHT TO YOU, BYE-BYE.
I'M GONNA HAVE TO GET A SECOND JOB.
I'M GONNA HAVE TO GET A SECOND
JOB. >> DOCTOR, THAT'S A WONDERFUL
A SECOND JOB. >> DOCTOR, THAT'S
A WONDERFUL THING YOU'RE DOING
DOCTOR, THAT'S A WONDERFUL
THING YOU'RE DOING FOR YOUR WIFE.
THING YOU'RE DOING FOR
YOUR WIFE. >> THANK YOU.
FOR YOUR WIFE. >> THANK
YOU. YOUR HUSBAND WILL DO IT
THANK YOU. YOUR HUSBAND
WILL DO IT FOR YOU SOMEDAY.
YOUR HUSBAND WILL DO IT FOR YOU
SOMEDAY. >> I CERTAINLY HOPE SO.
FOR YOU SOMEDAY. >> I CERTAINLY
HOPE SO. HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN
I CERTAINLY HOPE SO. HOW
LONG HAVE YOU BEEN MARRIED?
HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN
MARRIED? >> TWENTY-ONE YEARS.
MARRIED? >> TWENTY-ONE
YEARS. >> HOW MANY KIDS?
TWENTY-ONE YEARS. >> HOW
MANY KIDS? >> FOUR AT HOME AND ONE
HOW MANY KIDS? >> FOUR
AT HOME AND ONE IN COLLEGE.
FOUR AT HOME AND ONE
IN COLLEGE. >> FIVE CHILDREN,
IN COLLEGE. >> FIVE
CHILDREN, TWENTY-ONE YEARS.
FIVE CHILDREN, TWENTY-ONE
YEARS. WHAT ARE YOU CELEBRATING?
TWENTY-ONE YEARS. WHAT ARE
YOU CELEBRATING? >> SURVIVAL.
[MUSIC]
VANESSA, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
I'M WEARING IT TO THE DANCE TONIGHT.
I'M WEARING IT TO THE
DANCE TONIGHT. >> NICE.
TONIGHT. >> NICE.
WELL, WHAT IS IT,
NICE. >> WELL, WHAT
IS IT, A COSTUME PARTY?
WELL, WHAT IS IT, A COSTUME
PARTY? >> WHO ASKED YOU?
A COSTUME PARTY? >> WHO
ASKED YOU? >> FINE, LOOK LIKE THAT.
WHO ASKED YOU? >> FINE, LOOK
LIKE THAT. >> OKAY EVERYBODY, I WANT
FINE, LOOK LIKE THAT. >> OKAY
EVERYBODY, I WANT TO SEE YOU IN...
OKAY EVERYBODY, I WANT TO
SEE YOU IN... DENISE, GO SIT DOWN.
TO SEE YOU IN... DENISE, GO
SIT DOWN. >> MY NAILS ARE WET.
DENISE, GO SIT DOWN. >> MY NAILS ARE
WET. >> WELL, DON'T TOUCH THE COUCH.
MY NAILS ARE WET. >> WELL, DON'T
TOUCH THE COUCH. >> HELLO THERE,
WELL, DON'T TOUCH THE COUCH.
HELLO THERE, WHERE'S VANESSA?
HELLO THERE, WHERE'S
VANESSA? >> UPSTAIRS.
WHERE'S VANESSA? >>
UPSTAIRS. >> WILL YOU GO GET HER
UPSTAIRS. >> WILL YOU
GO GET HER FOR ME PLEASE?
WILL YOU GO GET HER
FOR ME PLEASE? >> OKAY.
FOR ME PLEASE? >>
OKAY. >> THANK YOU.
OKAY. >> THANK
YOU. HEY, LET HER GO.
THANK YOU. HEY, LET
HER GO. TURN THE TV OFF.
HEY, LET HER GO. TURN THE
TV OFF. >> OKAY, I'LL TURN
TURN THE TV OFF. >> OKAY,
I'LL TURN THE SOUND DOWN.
OKAY, I'LL TURN THE SOUND
DOWN. >> TURN OFF THE TV.
THE SOUND DOWN. >> TURN
OFF THE TV. >> COMPLETELY?
TURN OFF THE TV. >>
COMPLETELY? >> LATER ON, PULL IT OUT,
COMPLETELY? >> LATER ON,
PULL IT OUT, IT COMES BACK ON.
LATER ON, PULL IT OUT, IT
COMES BACK ON. TV'S WONDERFUL.
IT COMES BACK ON. TV'S
WONDERFUL. >> YES, DADDY?
TV'S WONDERFUL. >> YES,
DADDY? >> OH, WHERE'S RUDY?
YES, DADDY? >> OH, WHERE'S
RUDY? >> UPSTAIRS, I'LL GET HER.
OH, WHERE'S RUDY? >> UPSTAIRS,
I'LL GET HER. >> NO, DON'T GO GET HER,
UPSTAIRS, I'LL GET HER. >>
NO, DON'T GO GET HER, PLEASE.
NO, DON'T GO GET HER,
PLEASE. I'LL DEAL WITH WHAT I HAVE
PLEASE. I'LL DEAL
WITH WHAT I HAVE HERE.
I'LL DEAL WITH WHAT I HAVE HERE.
COME ON, COME SIT OVER HERE.
HERE. COME ON, COME SIT OVER
HERE. >> WELL, WHAT'S GOING ON?
COME ON, COME SIT OVER HERE. >> WELL, WHAT'S
GOING ON? >> YOUR MOTHER AND I ARE GOING
WELL, WHAT'S GOING ON? >> YOUR
MOTHER AND I ARE GOING OUT TONIGHT.
YOUR MOTHER AND I ARE
GOING OUT TONIGHT. >> HAVE FUN.
OUT TONIGHT. >> HAVE FUN.
NO, WHOA, WHOA PLEASE,
HAVE FUN. >> NO, WHOA, WHOA
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE.
NO, WHOA, WHOA PLEASE, PLEASE,
PLEASE, PLEASE. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE. THANK YOU
VERY MUCH. WE'RE GOING TO BE OUT LATE.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH. WE'RE
GOING TO BE OUT LATE. >> HOW LATE?
WE'RE GOING TO BE OUT LATE.
HOW LATE? >> TILL TOMORROW.
HOW LATE? >> TILL
TOMORROW. >> HAVE FUN.
TILL TOMORROW. >> HAVE FUN.
NO, NO, LISTEN THERE'S MORE.
HAVE FUN. >> NO, NO, LISTEN THERE'S
MORE. NOW DENISE, YOU ARE GOING
NO, NO, LISTEN THERE'S MORE. NOW
DENISE, YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE TO BABYSIT.
NOW DENISE, YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE
TO BABYSIT. >> DADDY, THAT'S NOT FAIR,
TO HAVE TO BABYSIT. >> DADDY,
THAT'S NOT FAIR, CANCELING MY PLANS
DADDY, THAT'S NOT FAIR, CANCELING
MY PLANS WITHOUT ANY WARNING.
CANCELING MY PLANS WITHOUT ANY
WARNING. >> YEAH, AND LOOK WHO YOU LEAVE
WITHOUT ANY WARNING. >> YEAH, AND LOOK
WHO YOU LEAVE IN CHARGE, THE DRAGON LADY.
YEAH, AND LOOK WHO YOU LEAVE IN CHARGE,
THE DRAGON LADY. >> CLIFF, I'M READY!
IN CHARGE, THE DRAGON LADY. >> CLIFF,
I'M READY! >> OKAY, HERE COMES YOUR MOM,
CLIFF, I'M READY! >> OKAY, HERE COMES
YOUR MOM, EVERYBODY, LINE UP, LINE UP.
OKAY, HERE COMES YOUR MOM, EVERYBODY,
LINE UP, LINE UP. >> OH, BOY, THIS MUST BE
EVERYBODY, LINE UP, LINE UP. >> OH, BOY,
THIS MUST BE SERIOUS, HE'S MAKING US LINE UP
OH, BOY, THIS MUST BE SERIOUS,
HE'S MAKING US LINE UP AGAIN.
SERIOUS, HE'S MAKING US LINE UP
AGAIN. >> WELL, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
AGAIN. >> WELL, WHAT DO YOU
THINK? >> DOESN'T MOM LOOK CLEAN?
WELL, WHAT DO YOU THINK? >> DOESN'T MOM
LOOK CLEAN? >> SAY GOOD-BYE TO YOUR MOTHER.
DOESN'T MOM LOOK CLEAN? >> SAY
GOOD-BYE TO YOUR MOTHER. >> GOOD-BYE.
SAY GOOD-BYE TO YOUR
MOTHER. >> GOOD-BYE. >> BYE, MOMMY.
GOOD-BYE. >> BYE, MOMMY.
NOW MRS. DAVIS IS GONNA
BYE, MOMMY. >> NOW MRS. DAVIS IS
GONNA SPEND THE NIGHT HERE TONIGHT AS
NOW MRS. DAVIS IS GONNA SPEND THE NIGHT HERE
TONIGHT AS SOON AS SHE GETS OFF FROM WORK.
SPEND THE NIGHT HERE TONIGHT AS SOON AS SHE
GETS OFF FROM WORK. AND I'M GOING TO LEAVE YOU
SOON AS SHE GETS OFF FROM WORK. AND I'M
GOING TO LEAVE YOU THE NUMBER FOR THE HOTEL.
AND I'M GOING TO LEAVE YOU THE NUMBER FOR
THE HOTEL. >> PLEASE, BEFORE YOU USE IT,
THE NUMBER FOR THE HOTEL. >>
PLEASE, BEFORE YOU USE IT, THINK.
PLEASE, BEFORE YOU USE IT,
THINK. AND THEN AFTER YOU MAKE YOUR
THINK. AND THEN AFTER YOU MAKE
YOUR DECISION, IF IT'S NECESSARY,
AND THEN AFTER YOU MAKE YOUR
DECISION, IF IT'S NECESSARY, THINK AGAIN.
DECISION, IF IT'S NECESSARY,
THINK AGAIN. ALL RIGHT, NOW DEAR.
THINK AGAIN. ALL RIGHT, NOW
DEAR. >> MOM, CAN WE SEND OUT
ALL RIGHT, NOW DEAR. >> MOM, CAN
WE SEND OUT FOR DINNER, OR DO I HAVE
MOM, CAN WE SEND OUT FOR
DINNER, OR DO I HAVE TO MAKE IT?
FOR DINNER, OR DO I HAVE TO
MAKE IT? >> DON'T ANSWER THAT!
TO MAKE IT? >> DON'T ANSWER
THAT! >> MOM, CAN I DO MY HOMEWORK
DON'T ANSWER THAT! >> MOM,
CAN I DO MY HOMEWORK AFTER DINNER?
MOM, CAN I DO MY HOMEWORK AFTER
DINNER? >> PAY NO ATTENTION TO THESE
AFTER DINNER? >> PAY NO
ATTENTION TO THESE PEOPLE.
PAY NO ATTENTION TO THESE
PEOPLE. >> MOM, WHAT ABOUT MY SCIENCE
PEOPLE. >> MOM, WHAT
ABOUT MY SCIENCE PROJECT?
MOM, WHAT ABOUT MY SCIENCE
PROJECT? YOU WANT ME TO DO IT ALL
PROJECT? YOU WANT ME
TO DO IT ALL BY MYSELF?
YOU WANT ME TO DO IT ALL
BY MYSELF? >> YOU ARE NOT
BY MYSELF? >> YOU ARE
NOT A MOTHER TONIGHT.
YOU ARE NOT A MOTHER
TONIGHT. >> GOOD-BYE, BABY.
A MOTHER TONIGHT. >> GOOD-BYE,
BABY. >> TAKE ME WITH YOU,
GOOD-BYE, BABY. >> TAKE
ME WITH YOU, I'LL BE GOOD.
TAKE ME WITH YOU, I'LL BE
GOOD. >> PAY NO ATTENTION TO THIS
I'LL BE GOOD. >> PAY NO
ATTENTION TO THIS CHILD.
PAY NO ATTENTION TO THIS CHILD.
HERE, CLAMP ON TO YOUR SISTER.
CHILD. HERE, CLAMP ON TO YOUR
SISTER. I HEREBY DECLARE THAT
HERE, CLAMP ON TO YOUR SISTER. I HEREBY
DECLARE THAT "YOU ARE NOT A MOTHER NIGHT"
I HEREBY DECLARE THAT "YOU ARE NOT A
MOTHER NIGHT" IS NOW BEGINNING AND LET
"YOU ARE NOT A MOTHER NIGHT" IS
NOW BEGINNING AND LET THE FUN START.
IS NOW BEGINNING AND LET THE
FUN START. >> YOU'RE STARTIN'
THE FUN START. >> YOU'RE
STARTIN' A LITTLE EARLY, AREN'T YOU?
[MUSIC]
[MUSIC]
WELL, THEN WHO WAS SHE DANCING
WITH? HEY, I THOUGHT THEY BROKE UP.
WAS SHE DANCING WITH? HEY, I
THOUGHT THEY BROKE UP. >> DENISE?
HEY, I THOUGHT THEY BROKE
UP. >> DENISE? >> HOLD ON.
DENISE? >> HOLD ON. WHAT?
HOLD ON. WHAT? >> CAN
I WATCH "FRANKENSTEIN?"
WHAT? >> CAN I WATCH "FRANKENSTEIN?"
DO YOU WANT TO WATCH IT?
CAN I WATCH "FRANKENSTEIN?"
DO YOU WANT TO WATCH IT? >> YES.
DO YOU WANT TO WATCH
IT? >> YES. >> SO, THEN WATCH IT.
YES. >> SO, THEN
WATCH IT. >> THAT WAS EASY.
SO, THEN WATCH IT. >> THAT WAS
EASY. >> THEY'RE SLOW DANCING NOW.
THAT WAS EASY. >> THEY'RE
SLOW DANCING NOW. >> DENISE?
THEY'RE SLOW DANCING NOW.
DENISE? >> HOLD ON, WHAT?
DENISE? >> HOLD ON, WHAT?
CAN I EAT THIS CUPCAKE?
HOLD ON, WHAT? >> CAN I EAT
THIS CUPCAKE? >> IT'S UP TO YOU.
CAN I EAT THIS CUPCAKE? >> IT'S
UP TO YOU. >> BUT I'VE ALREADY EATEN
IT'S UP TO YOU. >> BUT I'VE
ALREADY EATEN FOUR OF THEM.
BUT I'VE ALREADY EATEN
FOUR OF THEM. >> UP TO YOU.
FOUR OF THEM. >> UP
TO YOU. >> SHE DID?
UP TO YOU. >> SHE
DID? AND HE LET HER?
SHE DID? AND
HE LET HER? >> BYE.
AND HE LET HER?
BYE. >> HOLD ON.
BYE. >> HOLD ON.
WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
HOLD ON. WHERE ARE
YOU GOING? >> I'M HISTORY.
WHERE ARE YOU GOING? >> I'M
HISTORY. >> IF YOU WALK OUT THAT DOOR,
I'M HISTORY. >> IF YOU WALK OUT
THAT DOOR, I'M TELLING DADDY THAT YOU'VE
IF YOU WALK OUT THAT DOOR, I'M TELLING
DADDY THAT YOU'VE BEEN CUTTING OUT PICTURES
I'M TELLING DADDY THAT YOU'VE BEEN
CUTTING OUT PICTURES FROM HIS MEDICAL BOOKS
BEEN CUTTING OUT PICTURES FROM
HIS MEDICAL BOOKS AND SELLING THEM.
FROM HIS MEDICAL BOOKS AND
SELLING THEM. >> WELL, I'VE GOT STUFF
AND SELLING THEM. >> WELL, I'VE
GOT STUFF ON YOU TOO, YOU KNOW?
WELL, I'VE GOT STUFF ON YOU
TOO, YOU KNOW? >> LIKE WHAT?
ON YOU TOO, YOU KNOW? >>
LIKE WHAT? >> YOU WORRIED?
LIKE WHAT? >>
YOU WORRIED? >> NO.
YOU WORRIED? >> NO. >> GOOD.
TASTE THIS. >> I'M
FINE. >> COME ON, NOW.
I'M FINE. >> COME
ON, NOW. TASTE THIS.
COME ON, NOW. TASTE
THIS. >> CLIFF, THAT IS PIGEON.
TASTE THIS. >> CLIFF, THAT IS
PIGEON. >> WELL, LISTEN, THAT IS COW.
CLIFF, THAT IS PIGEON. >> WELL,
LISTEN, THAT IS COW. NOW TASTE THIS.
WELL, LISTEN, THAT IS COW. NOW
TASTE THIS. >> ALL I CAN THINK OF ARE
NOW TASTE THIS. >> ALL I CAN THINK
OF ARE THE PIGEONS ON THE LEDGE
ALL I CAN THINK OF ARE THE PIGEONS
ON THE LEDGE OUTSIDE MY OFFICE.
THE PIGEONS ON THE LEDGE OUTSIDE
MY OFFICE. >> THOSE ARE THE REJECTS.
OUTSIDE MY OFFICE. >> THOSE ARE THE
REJECTS. NOW THIS ONCE HAD A HEAD ON IT,
THOSE ARE THE REJECTS. NOW THIS ONCE HAD A
HEAD ON IT, LONG EYELASHES AND SAID, "MOO."
NOW THIS ONCE HAD A HEAD ON IT,
LONG EYELASHES AND SAID, "MOO." OKAY?
LONG EYELASHES AND SAID, "MOO."
OKAY? NOW, COME ON, JUST TAKE
OKAY? NOW, COME ON, JUST
TAKE A LITTLE BITE, PLEASE.
NOW, COME ON, JUST TAKE
A LITTLE BITE, PLEASE. HUH?
A LITTLE BITE, PLEASE.
HUH? HOW ABOUT IT?
HUH? HOW ABOUT
IT? >> IT'S NOT BAD.
HOW ABOUT IT? >> IT'S NOT BAD.
YEAH, WANT ANOTHER BITE?
IT'S NOT BAD. >> YEAH,
WANT ANOTHER BITE? >> NO.
YEAH, WANT ANOTHER BITE? >>
NO. >> COME ON, YOU KNOW YOU WANT
NO. >> COME ON, YOU
KNOW YOU WANT ANOTHER BITE.
COME ON, YOU KNOW YOU
WANT ANOTHER BITE. CLIFF, I DO NOT.
ANOTHER BITE. CLIFF, I DO
NOT. >> YOU ARE DYING FOR
CLIFF, I DO NOT. >> YOU ARE
DYING FOR ANOTHER BITE.
YOU ARE DYING FOR ANOTHER
BITE. >> I DO NOT WANT ANOTHER BITE.
ANOTHER BITE. >> I DO NOT
WANT ANOTHER BITE. >> OKAY.
WELL, MAY I HAVE SOME OF YOUR
STEAK? >> YOU DON'T LIKE YOURS?
OF YOUR STEAK? >> YOU DON'T
LIKE YOURS? >> WELL, THIS IS PIGEON.
YOU DON'T LIKE YOURS? >> WELL, THIS
IS PIGEON. >> I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU WENT
WELL, THIS IS PIGEON. >> I DON'T
KNOW WHY YOU WENT THROUGH ALL THAT.
I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU WENT THROUGH
ALL THAT. IF YOU WANTED A PIECE OF STEAK,
THROUGH ALL THAT. IF YOU WANTED A
PIECE OF STEAK, ALL YOU HAD TO DO IS ASK
IF YOU WANTED A PIECE OF STEAK,
ALL YOU HAD TO DO IS ASK FOR IT.
CLAIR, WHAT ARE YOU
DOING, DEAR? [LAUGHING]
DEAR? [LAUGHING] >>
I JUST HAD THE URGE
[LAUGHING] >> I JUST HAD THE
URGE TO CUT SOMEBODY'S MEAT.
I JUST HAD THE URGE TO CUT
SOMEBODY'S MEAT. >> I KNOW IT.
TO CUT SOMEBODY'S MEAT. >>
I KNOW IT. I KNOW THE FEELING.
I KNOW IT. I KNOW THE FEELING.
WE ARE VERY FORTUNATE
I KNOW THE FEELING. >> WE ARE VERY
FORTUNATE TO HAVE THE CHILDREN, CLIFF.
WE ARE VERY FORTUNATE TO HAVE THE CHILDREN,
CLIFF. OTHERWISE, WE WOULD NEVER KNOW
TO HAVE THE CHILDREN, CLIFF. OTHERWISE, WE
WOULD NEVER KNOW THE JOY OF LEAVING THEM
OTHERWISE, WE WOULD NEVER KNOW
THE JOY OF LEAVING THEM AT HOME.
THE JOY OF LEAVING THEM AT
HOME. >> LET'S NOT GO BACK.
AT HOME. >> LET'S NOT GO
BACK. >> YOU MEAN TOMORROW?
LET'S NOT GO BACK. >> YOU
MEAN TOMORROW? >> I MEAN FOREVER.
YOU MEAN TOMORROW? >> I
MEAN FOREVER. NO, I'M SERIOUS.
I MEAN FOREVER. NO, I'M
SERIOUS. LET 'EM HAVE THE HOUSE,
NO, I'M SERIOUS. LET 'EM HAVE
THE HOUSE, AND WE'LL STAY HERE.
LET 'EM HAVE THE HOUSE, AND WE'LL
STAY HERE. AND WHAT WE'LL DO IS MAYBE
AND WE'LL STAY HERE. AND WHAT WE'LL DO
IS MAYBE WE'LL CALL 'EM WHEN WE GET OLD.
AND WHAT WE'LL DO IS MAYBE WE'LL
CALL 'EM WHEN WE GET OLD. YES.
WE'LL CALL 'EM WHEN
WE GET OLD. YES. >> OH.
YES. >> OH. >> HMM?
OH. >> HMM? >> I
JUST HAD ANOTHER URGE.
HMM? >> I JUST HAD ANOTHER
URGE. >> WHAT YOU WANT TO TAKE
I JUST HAD ANOTHER URGE. >> WHAT YOU
WANT TO TAKE SOMEBODY TO THE BATHROOM?
WHAT YOU WANT TO TAKE SOMEBODY TO
THE BATHROOM? >> I HAVEN'T TOLD ANYBODY
SOMEBODY TO THE BATHROOM? >> I HAVEN'T
TOLD ANYBODY TO SHUT UP IN THE PAST HOUR.
I HAVEN'T TOLD ANYBODY TO SHUT UP IN
THE PAST HOUR. >> OH, GO AHEAD, TELL ME.
TO SHUT UP IN THE PAST HOUR. >> OH, GO
AHEAD, TELL ME. >> I DON'T WANT TO TELL YOU.
OH, GO AHEAD, TELL ME. >> I DON'T WANT
TO TELL YOU. >> NO, GO AHEAD, SAY IT TO ME.
I DON'T WANT TO TELL YOU. >> NO, GO AHEAD,
SAY IT TO ME. JUST SAY, "SHUT UP, CLIFF,
NO, GO AHEAD, SAY IT TO ME.
JUST SAY, "SHUT UP, CLIFF, SHUT UP."
JUST SAY, "SHUT UP, CLIFF, SHUT
UP." >> OH, CLIFF, I'M NOT GONNA
SHUT UP." >> OH, CLIFF, I'M NOT
GONNA TELL YOU TO SHUT UP.
OH, CLIFF, I'M NOT GONNA TELL
YOU TO SHUT UP. >> LISTEN, LET IT OUT.
TELL YOU TO SHUT UP. >> LISTEN, LET
IT OUT. IF YOU GOT A "SHUT UP" INSIDE
LISTEN, LET IT OUT. IF YOU GOT A
"SHUT UP" INSIDE TO MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER,
IF YOU GOT A "SHUT UP" INSIDE TO
MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER, JUST LET IT OUT.
TO MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER,
JUST LET IT OUT. "SHUT UP."
JUST LET IT OUT. "SHUT
UP." >> YOU ARE CRAZY.
"SHUT UP." >> YOU ARE CRAZY.
NO, NO, I'M NOT KIDDING.
YOU ARE CRAZY. >> NO, NO, I'M NOT
KIDDING. LOOK, WHICH ONE OF THE CHILDREN
NO, NO, I'M NOT KIDDING. LOOK,
WHICH ONE OF THE CHILDREN COULD I BE?
LOOK, WHICH ONE OF THE CHILDREN
COULD I BE? I KNOW, "OH, MOTHER,
COULD I BE? I KNOW, "OH,
MOTHER, THIS IS MY LIFE.
I KNOW, "OH, MOTHER, THIS IS MY
LIFE. YOU'RE SO OLD-FASHIONED."
THIS IS MY LIFE. YOU'RE SO
OLD-FASHIONED." >> SHUT UP.
YOU'RE SO OLD-FASHIONED." >> SHUT
UP. >> NOW, NOW, SEE, FELT GOOD,
SHUT UP. >> NOW, NOW,
SEE, FELT GOOD, DIDN'T IT?
NOW, NOW, SEE, FELT GOOD,
DIDN'T IT? NOW LET'S SEE, LET ME THINK
DIDN'T IT? NOW LET'S SEE,
LET ME THINK OF ANOTHER ONE.
NOW LET'S SEE, LET ME THINK OF
ANOTHER ONE. "MOM, RUDY'S BOTHERING ME."
OF ANOTHER ONE. "MOM, RUDY'S BOTHERING
ME." >> SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP.
"MOM, RUDY'S BOTHERING ME." >> SHUT UP, SHUT
UP, SHUT UP. >> SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP.
SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP. >>
SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP. [LAUGHING]
[MUSIC]
[TELEPHONE RINGING]
DR. HUXTABLE'S RESIDENCE. YES, I
SEE. WELL, HOW FAR APART ARE THEY?
YES, I SEE. WELL, HOW FAR
APART ARE THEY? AN HOUR?
WELL, HOW FAR APART ARE THEY?
AN HOUR? WELL, IT COULD BE A LOT
AN HOUR? WELL, IT COULD BE
A LOT OF THINGS, MRS. COLLINS,
WELL, IT COULD BE A LOT OF THINGS,
MRS. COLLINS, BUT I WOULDN'T DIAGNOSE IT
OF THINGS, MRS. COLLINS, BUT I
WOULDN'T DIAGNOSE IT AS LABOR PAINS.
BUT I WOULDN'T DIAGNOSE IT AS
LABOR PAINS. HAVE YOU EATEN ANYTHING
AS LABOR PAINS. HAVE YOU
EATEN ANYTHING UNUSUAL?
HAVE YOU EATEN ANYTHING
UNUSUAL? NO, THIS ISN'T THE DOCTOR.
UNUSUAL? NO, THIS ISN'T THE
DOCTOR. THIS IS HIS SON, THEO.
NO, THIS ISN'T THE DOCTOR. THIS IS HIS
SON, THEO. NO, HE'S GONE FOR THE EVENING.
THIS IS HIS SON, THEO. NO, HE'S GONE FOR
THE EVENING. DR. DALEY IS COVERING FOR HIM.
NO, HE'S GONE FOR THE EVENING. DR. DALEY IS
COVERING FOR HIM. I'LL GIVE YOU THE NUMBER.
DR. DALEY IS COVERING FOR HIM. I'LL
GIVE YOU THE NUMBER. I HEAR HE'S GOOD.
I'LL GIVE YOU THE NUMBER. I HEAR HE'S
GOOD. NO, BUT HE CAME OVER HERE ONCE
I HEAR HE'S GOOD. NO, BUT HE CAME OVER
HERE ONCE AND HE LOOKED PRETTY SMART.
NO, BUT HE CAME OVER HERE ONCE
AND HE LOOKED PRETTY SMART. 555-1639.
AND HE LOOKED PRETTY
SMART. 555-1639. THANK YOU!
555-1639. THANK YOU!
NO, I'M NOT GOING INTO
THANK YOU! NO, I'M NOT GOING
INTO MEDICINE, DAD WON'T LET ME.
NO, I'M NOT GOING INTO
MEDICINE, DAD WON'T LET ME. BYE.
[MUSIC]
CLIFF, WHAT... CLIFF. CLIFF.
HOW FAR APART ARE THEY?
CLIFF. >> HOW FAR APART ARE
THEY? >> OH, NOW HOW COULD YOU
HOW FAR APART ARE THEY? >>
OH, NOW HOW COULD YOU DO THAT?
OH, NOW HOW COULD
YOU DO THAT? >> DO WHAT?
DO THAT? >> DO WHAT?
YOU WERE SLEEPING.
DO WHAT? >> YOU WERE
SLEEPING. >> CORRECTION, NAPPING.
YOU WERE SLEEPING. >> CORRECTION,
NAPPING. SLEEPING IS UNDER THE COVERS
CORRECTION, NAPPING. SLEEPING IS
UNDER THE COVERS AND DON'T COME OUT TILL
SLEEPING IS UNDER THE COVERS
AND DON'T COME OUT TILL MORNING.
AND DON'T COME OUT TILL MORNING.
NAPPING IS ON TOP OF THE COVERS
MORNING. NAPPING IS ON TOP OF
THE COVERS WHICH IS OVER NOW.
NAPPING IS ON TOP OF THE COVERS
WHICH IS OVER NOW. >> THIS IS YOUR IDEA
WHICH IS OVER NOW. >> THIS IS
YOUR IDEA OF A FUN EVENING?
THIS IS YOUR IDEA OF A FUN EVENING?
YOU COME UP HERE TO TAKE A NAP?
OF A FUN EVENING? YOU COME UP HERE TO
TAKE A NAP? >> NO, MY IDEA OF A FUN EVENING
YOU COME UP HERE TO TAKE A NAP? >> NO, MY
IDEA OF A FUN EVENING IS TO PUT MY PAJAMAS ON,
NO, MY IDEA OF A FUN EVENING IS TO PUT MY
PAJAMAS ON, GET IN THE BED AND WAIT 6 HOURS
IS TO PUT MY PAJAMAS ON, GET IN THE
BED AND WAIT 6 HOURS FOR MY WIFE TO COME
GET IN THE BED AND WAIT 6 HOURS FOR
MY WIFE TO COME OUT OF THE BATHROOM.
FOR MY WIFE TO COME OUT OF THE
BATHROOM. >> CLIFF, THAT BATHROOM IS
OUT OF THE BATHROOM. >> CLIFF,
THAT BATHROOM IS VERY NICE.
CLIFF, THAT BATHROOM
IS VERY NICE. IT'S NICER THAN
VERY NICE. IT'S NICER
THAN OUR LIVING ROOM.
IT'S NICER THAN OUR LIVING ROOM.
IT EVEN HAS A PHONE IN THERE.
OUR LIVING ROOM. IT EVEN HAS A
PHONE IN THERE. >> AND YOU CAN CALL
IT EVEN HAS A PHONE IN THERE. >> AND
YOU CAN CALL ALL THE OTHER BATHROOMS
AND YOU CAN CALL ALL THE
OTHER BATHROOMS IN THE HOTEL.
ALL THE OTHER BATHROOMS IN
THE HOTEL. IS THAT WHAT YOU DID?
IN THE HOTEL. IS THAT WHAT YOU
DID? >> I DIDN'T THINK YOU'D MIND
IS THAT WHAT YOU DID? >> I DIDN'T THINK
YOU'D MIND THE TIME IT TOOK ONCE YOU SAW
I DIDN'T THINK YOU'D MIND THE TIME IT
TOOK ONCE YOU SAW THE FINISHED PRODUCT.
THE TIME IT TOOK ONCE YOU SAW THE
FINISHED PRODUCT. >> YOU KNOW YOU'RE RIGHT.
THE FINISHED PRODUCT. >> YOU
KNOW YOU'RE RIGHT. LET'S GET IT ON.
YOU KNOW YOU'RE RIGHT.
LET'S GET IT ON. >> CLIFF.
LET'S GET IT ON. >> CLIFF.
DID YOU HAVE TO SAY THAT?
CLIFF. DID YOU HAVE
TO SAY THAT? >> SAY WHAT?
DID YOU HAVE TO SAY THAT?
SAY WHAT? WHAT DID I SAY?
SAY WHAT? WHAT DID
I SAY? >> LET'S GET IT ON.
WHAT DID I SAY? >> LET'S GET IT
ON. >> WELL, I MEAN IT SOUNDED GOOD
LET'S GET IT ON. >> WELL, I
MEAN IT SOUNDED GOOD TO ME.
WELL, I MEAN IT SOUNDED GOOD
TO ME. >> WELL, THAT'S NOT A VERY
TO ME. >> WELL, THAT'S
NOT A VERY ROMANTIC LINE.
WELL, THAT'S NOT A VERY ROMANTIC
LINE. >> I DIDN'T KNOW THIS WAS
ROMANTIC LINE. >> I DIDN'T
KNOW THIS WAS A SCRIPT.
I DIDN'T KNOW THIS WAS A SCRIPT.
I THOUGHT WE WERE SUPPOSED
A SCRIPT. I THOUGHT WE WERE
SUPPOSED TO MAKE IT UP AS WE GO ALONG.
I THOUGHT WE WERE SUPPOSED TO MAKE IT UP AS
WE GO ALONG. >> BUT YOU COULD TRY SOMETHING
TO MAKE IT UP AS WE GO ALONG. >> BUT YOU COULD
TRY SOMETHING LIKE, "YOU KNOW YOU LOOK REALLY
BUT YOU COULD TRY SOMETHING LIKE, "YOU KNOW
YOU LOOK REALLY BEAUTIFUL THIS EVENING."
LIKE, "YOU KNOW YOU LOOK REALLY
BEAUTIFUL THIS EVENING." >> SURE.
BEAUTIFUL THIS EVENING." >>
SURE. >> OKAY, SO WHY DON'T YOU
SURE. >> OKAY, SO
WHY DON'T YOU TRY THAT?
OKAY, SO WHY DON'T
YOU TRY THAT? >> NO.
TRY THAT? >> NO. >>
BUT IT'S VERY ROMANTIC.
NO. >> BUT IT'S VERY
ROMANTIC. >> YEAH, IT'S ROMANTIC IF
BUT IT'S VERY ROMANTIC. >>
YEAH, IT'S ROMANTIC IF I SAY IT.
YEAH, IT'S ROMANTIC IF I
SAY IT. BUT IT ISN'T ROMANTIC
I SAY IT. BUT IT ISN'T ROMANTIC
IF YOU TELL ME TO SAY IT.
BUT IT ISN'T ROMANTIC IF YOU TELL ME
TO SAY IT. >> WELL, I WAS JUST TRYING
IF YOU TELL ME TO SAY IT. >>
WELL, I WAS JUST TRYING TO HELP.
WELL, I WAS JUST TRYING TO
HELP. >> WELL, BUT I DON'T NEED
TO HELP. >> WELL, BUT I
DON'T NEED YOUR HELP.
WELL, BUT I DON'T NEED
YOUR HELP. >> SO WHAT DO I DO?
YOUR HELP. >> SO WHAT
DO I DO? >> YOU LET ME SAY
SO WHAT DO I DO? >> YOU
LET ME SAY WHAT I WANT TO SAY.
YOU LET ME SAY WHAT I WANT
TO SAY. >> IF I LET YOU SAY IT YOU ARE
WHAT I WANT TO SAY. >> IF I LET YOU SAY
IT YOU ARE GONNA SAY, "LET'S GET IT ON."
IF I LET YOU SAY IT YOU ARE GONNA
SAY, "LET'S GET IT ON." >> NO, NO, NO, NO,
GONNA SAY, "LET'S GET IT ON."
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO,
NO. "LET'S GET IT ON" IS RETIRED.
NO, NO, NO, NO. "LET'S GET IT
ON" IS RETIRED. THAT'S FINISHED.
"LET'S GET IT ON" IS RETIRED.
THAT'S FINISHED. OKAY?
THAT'S FINISHED. OKAY? >> OKAY.
OKAY? >> OKAY. >> ALL RIGHT.
YOU LIKE THAT? >>
MM-HMM. >> I MADE THAT UP.
HOW'S THAT FEEL? >> IT'S
PRETTY NICE. >> MADE THAT UP TOO.
IT'S PRETTY NICE. >> MADE THAT
UP TOO. AND I'M MAKING UP SOME MORE
MADE THAT UP TOO. AND I'M
MAKING UP SOME MORE AS I GO ALONG.
AND I'M MAKING UP SOME MORE AS I GO
ALONG. NOW PAY CLOSE ATTENTION NOW.
AS I GO ALONG. NOW PAY
CLOSE ATTENTION NOW. WHAAA.
NOW PAY CLOSE ATTENTION
NOW. WHAAA. >> MORE, MORE.
WHAAA. >> MORE, MORE. >>
NO, NO, NO, NO, WAIT, WAIT.
MORE, MORE. >> NO, NO, NO, NO,
WAIT, WAIT. NOW YOU CAN'T RUSH ME.
YOU KNOW SOMETHIN'? I LOVE YOU VERY,
VERY MUCH. IT'S A PRIVILEGE TO WAKE UP IN
I LOVE YOU VERY, VERY MUCH. IT'S A PRIVILEGE
TO WAKE UP IN THE MORNING AND SEE YOUR FACE.
IT'S A PRIVILEGE TO WAKE UP IN THE MORNING
AND SEE YOUR FACE. YOU ARE MY LIFE, AND I MEAN
THE MORNING AND SEE YOUR FACE.
YOU ARE MY LIFE, AND I MEAN THAT.
YOU ARE MY LIFE, AND I
MEAN THAT. >> OH, CLIFF.
THAT. >> OH, CLIFF.
LET'S GET IT ON.
I, I AM THE ONE WHO'S SUPPOSED TO
SAY THAT. >> YES DEAR, BUT YOU SAID IT
SUPPOSED TO SAY THAT. >> YES
DEAR, BUT YOU SAID IT TOO SOON.
YES DEAR, BUT YOU
SAID IT TOO SOON. >> I SEE.
TOO SOON. >> I SEE.
SO IT'S TIMING, RIGHT?
I SEE. SO IT'S
TIMING, RIGHT? TIMING.
SO IT'S TIMING, RIGHT?
TIMING. ALL RIGHT.
TIMING. ALL RIGHT. OH...
ALL RIGHT. OH...
[TELEPHONE RINGING]
HELLO. THIS BETTER BE
NECESSARY. IT'S FOR YOU.
THIS BETTER BE NECESSARY.
IT'S FOR YOU. >> HELLO.
IT'S FOR YOU. >> HELLO.
GOOD NIGHT, MOM!
HELLO. >> GOOD NIGHT,
MOM! AND DON'T COME HOME
GOOD NIGHT, MOM! AND DON'T
COME HOME WITH ANOTHER BABY!
[MUSIC]
NOW YOU REALIZE THAT ONCE YOU
STEP INSIDE IT'S ALL OVER. >> I'M READY.
YOU STEP INSIDE IT'S ALL OVER.
I'M READY. >> YOU LOOSE?
I'M READY. >> YOU
LOOSE? >> I'M LOOSE.
YOU LOOSE? >> I'M
LOOSE. >> YOU WANT TO TAKE
I'M LOOSE. >> YOU WANT
TO TAKE A JOG AROUND?
YOU WANT TO TAKE A JOG
AROUND? >> COME ON, CLIFF,
A JOG AROUND? >> COME
ON, CLIFF, I MISS THE KIDS.
COME ON, CLIFF, I MISS
THE KIDS. >> ALL RIGHT.
I MISS THE KIDS. >> ALL RIGHT.
MOM, I'M GLAD YOU'RE HOME.
ALL RIGHT. >> MOM, I'M
GLAD YOU'RE HOME. >> OH, RUDY.
MOM, I'M GLAD YOU'RE HOME. >> OH,
RUDY. >> NOW WATCH IT, THERE MAY BE
OH, RUDY. >> NOW WATCH
IT, THERE MAY BE A TRAP.
NOW WATCH IT, THERE MAY
BE A TRAP. [DISHES BREAKING]
A TRAP. [DISHES BREAKING]
THAT WAS MY MUG!
[DISHES BREAKING] >> THAT WAS MY
MUG! >> HEY, YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE LEFT
THAT WAS MY MUG! >> HEY,
YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE LEFT IT THERE.
HEY, YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE LEFT
IT THERE. >> YOU'RE CLEANING IT UP.
IT THERE. >> YOU'RE CLEANING
IT UP. >> IT WAS YOUR MUG.
YOU'RE CLEANING IT UP. >>
IT WAS YOUR MUG. >> SHUT UP!
IT WAS YOUR MUG. >>
SHUT UP! >> IT'S BEEN LIKE THIS
SHUT UP! >> IT'S BEEN
LIKE THIS ALL MORNING.
IT'S BEEN LIKE THIS ALL
MORNING. >> I'M CALLING MOM.
ALL MORNING. >> I'M CALLING
MOM. >> YOU BETTER NOT.
I'M CALLING MOM. >> YOU BETTER
NOT. >> MOM, DO YOU KNOW WHAT
YOU BETTER NOT. >> MOM,
DO YOU KNOW WHAT HE DID?
MOM, DO YOU KNOW
WHAT HE DID? HE BROKE...
HE DID? HE BROKE... >> I DID NOT!
HE BROKE... >> I
DID NOT! I DID NOT!
I DID NOT! I DID
NOT! >> HOLD IT.
I DID NOT! >> HOLD IT. HOLD IT!
HOLD IT. HOLD IT!
WHY DON'T YOU ALL STOP?
HOLD IT! WHY DON'T YOU ALL
STOP? YOUR MOTHER AND I ARE JUST
WHY DON'T YOU ALL STOP? YOUR MOTHER
AND I ARE JUST COMING BACK FROM A LOVELY
YOUR MOTHER AND I ARE JUST
COMING BACK FROM A LOVELY NIGHT OUT.
COMING BACK FROM A LOVELY
NIGHT OUT. WE WALK IN HERE,
NIGHT OUT. WE WALK IN
HERE, AND WHAT DO WE SEE?
WE WALK IN HERE, AND WHAT DO WE
SEE? THE ATTACK OF THE ANT PEOPLE.
AND WHAT DO WE SEE? THE ATTACK
OF THE ANT PEOPLE. SIT DOWN.
THE ATTACK OF THE ANT PEOPLE.
SIT DOWN. NOW, I WANT ALL OF YOU
SIT DOWN. NOW, I WANT
ALL OF YOU TO JUST RELAX.
NOW, I WANT ALL OF YOU TO JUST
RELAX. YOU'RE MAKING YOUR MOTHER'S
TO JUST RELAX. YOU'RE MAKING
YOUR MOTHER'S FACE DO LIKE THIS...
YOU'RE MAKING YOUR MOTHER'S FACE DO
LIKE THIS... AND IF SHE CONTINUES TO LOOK
FACE DO LIKE THIS... AND IF SHE CONTINUES
TO LOOK LIKE THIS, YOU'RE GOING TO GROW
AND IF SHE CONTINUES TO LOOK LIKE THIS, YOU'RE
GOING TO GROW OLDER, GET MARRIED, AND SHE'LL
LIKE THIS, YOU'RE GOING TO GROW OLDER, GET
MARRIED, AND SHE'LL SHOW UP AT YOUR WEDDING
OLDER, GET MARRIED, AND SHE'LL SHOW
UP AT YOUR WEDDING LOOKING LIKE THIS...
SHOW UP AT YOUR WEDDING LOOKING
LIKE THIS... DO YOU WANT YOUR MOTHER
LOOKING LIKE THIS... DO YOU WANT
YOUR MOTHER TO LOOK LIKE THIS FOREVER?
DO YOU WANT YOUR MOTHER TO
LOOK LIKE THIS FOREVER? >> NO.
TO LOOK LIKE THIS FOREVER?
NO. >> THEN I WANT YOU TO GO
NO. >> THEN I WANT YOU TO
GO INTO THE KITCHEN AND CLEAN
THEN I WANT YOU TO GO INTO THE
KITCHEN AND CLEAN IT UP TOGETHER.
INTO THE KITCHEN AND CLEAN
IT UP TOGETHER. >> ME TOO?
IT UP TOGETHER. >> ME
TOO? >> WATCH AND LEARN.
CLAIR, I'M SORRY. I KNOW YOU
PROBABLY WANT ONE MORE DAY, DON'T YOU?
I KNOW YOU PROBABLY WANT ONE MORE
DAY, DON'T YOU? >> OH, NO, LAST NIGHT WAS
ONE MORE DAY, DON'T YOU? >> OH,
NO, LAST NIGHT WAS JUST ENOUGH.
OH, NO, LAST NIGHT WAS JUST
ENOUGH. >> I THINK YOU COULD HAVE USED
JUST ENOUGH. >> I THINK YOU COULD
HAVE USED THE WHOLE WEEKEND.
I THINK YOU COULD HAVE USED THE WHOLE
WEEKEND. >> NO, REALLY, LAST NIGHT WAS
THE WHOLE WEEKEND. >> NO, REALLY, LAST
NIGHT WAS JUST PERFECT WITH THE FOOD
NO, REALLY, LAST NIGHT WAS JUST PERFECT
WITH THE FOOD AND THE WINE AND THE PASSION.
JUST PERFECT WITH THE FOOD AND THE WINE
AND THE PASSION. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO WANTS
AND THE WINE AND THE PASSION. YOU'RE
THE ONE WHO WANTS THE WHOLE WEEKEND.
YOU'RE THE ONE WHO WANTS
THE WHOLE WEEKEND. >> NO.
THE WHOLE WEEKEND. >>
NO. COULD'VE USED A MONTH.
NO. COULD'VE
USED A MONTH. [MUSIC]
[MUSIC]
"THE COSBY SHOW" IS TAPED IN
FRONT OF A LIVE STUDIO AUDIENCE.