Temptation Island (2019–…): Season 4, Episode 5 - Plot Twist - full transcript

Previously
on Temptation Island...

I'm not getting that
love connection between us.

- Mm-hmm.
- If it's just not sparking,

then don't... you
can't force a fire, you know?

I'm sorry if I misled you.

I kind of feel
like I do like you.

I feel kinda the same way
about you,

I love having
conversations with you.

It's just so easy.

Marissa makes me nervous.

Sometimes I will
look into her eyes



and just feel something...

really deeply.

I don't want things between
us to kind of, like, switch up.

I'm still here for you.
I can't change who I am.

Like, I genuinely
care about you.

I don't want
you to change who you are.

I realized through
this process that things

that I thought coming into
this would save my relationship,

I don't want those things.

And I need to be able
to express them to Ash.

It's good to be back.

Good to be back.

How you feeling, man?

Just, like, lost.



Just like where...
Where do I start?

Iris is calling
this guy husband material

and this guy's a gentleman.

I think it's
hitting me harder now,

knowing that another
man is fulfilling things that

I can't for Iris.

What do you guys
think about the whole thing

where I'm just like,
I want Iris to see...

I think... Okay, shut the
up about Iris,

is what I feel.

You're making
everything about Iris.

You need to make it about you.

Oh, ladies.
Sports Illustrated.

You guys need
to get your swimsuits on

because we have
some fun stuff planned!

All right.

We come back from the bonfire

and there's been a lot
of tension in the house.

So, I'm down to turn it up
and I heard a slip n' slide.

So, you know
it's about to get wet n' wild.

Go!

I think there's
supposed to be a winner,

but we honestly
got really distracted

and just kept
sliding regardless.

I'm glad to see that

everyone's just
kind of as goofy as I am.

Whoa!

You know, I'm happy.

Is what I think it is?

Do you see...

It wasn't there.
It wasn't there.

I'm only romantically
interested in Trace.

I didn't want to, like, tell
her about it in the house

because I feel like that'd
be, like, unnecessary.

You came here
to pursue other things.

And if you found
something that you want

to pursue, why are people
trying to stop you?

You know?

My entire...

No, I get it.
I get it. I get it.

Lascelles has been constantly

telling everybody
he likes Trace.

- We understand that.
- We understand that.

- We respect that.
- We get that. However...

Give everyone a fair shot.

All the other guys are fine.

He is very codependent

and he's very content
with being codependent.

Like, it's toxic.

Whenever you're in bed at night,

I want you to be like,

"Who do I personally
want?" Personally.

- Shut everybody out.
- Yeah.

"What do I want?"

Yeah.

If it's Trace, take her.

Okay.
That's what I'm saying.

She's so thirsty, man.

That shit,
like, really bothers me.

But look, you can ask him
to take responsibility

for that too. If he's
not setting a boundary...

No, that's what
I'm saying. He has.

But it's not
clear enough, obviously.

I'll say for it everybody.
Everybody who's listening,

I am only romantically
interested in Trace.

I found this out
between ten and 15 minutes

of getting to know her.

I spoke to everyone here
for at least ten to 15 minutes.

No one else
has made me feel that way.

I'm so proud of him
for standing his ground

and making it known.

I just think that's
what these girls needed.

So, no one else approach me.

I'm only going
to talk to Trace now.

I don't want any more friends.

Maybe that's better.
Maybe I don't talk to anybody.

You're not going to grow.

But whose fault is that?

Everything we talk
about I addressed it already.

How did that even get so heated?
I don't even know.

Because he's sick
of seeing the same shit.

And so, he got up and announced

to the whole house
not to talk to him

and not to be friends with him.

Maybe take a step back and say,

"Maybe I didn't
handle this the right way."

Yeah.

I'm tired of talking.

Today at the bonfire,

my boyfriend was crying
in front of this girl.

He never showed me
that emotional side of him.

So, I'm kind of,
like, confused as to why

he's opening up
so quickly with this girl

and not with me,
after seven years.

Maybe I didn't do enough or...

Yeah, I know it's not my fault.

You seem to be everything
that anybody would want.

Cheers to that.

Thank you. Oh, my God, yes.

I was thinking
about you the entire time.

I was hoping everything
was going to be all right.

Thank you.

He was making
my feelings feel invalid.

Thank you.

If anything,
he should be telling her like,

"I feel extremely
bad because I hurt Iris,

like, five months ago."

So do you think,
like, after seeing that,

like, his progression
is kind of leading down one way

and yours is going another?

I do, but I also don't
know what they're showing him.

- You like it?
- I love it. Wow.

How was it?

The clip wasn't bad.

But also not going in believing

I'm with a good person
was extremely helpful.

- What's up?
- I want a game plan here.

What's a game plan?

I want you in my bed.

But with boundaries.

Tommy and I have been
getting super close

and I felt comfortable
letting him sleep in my bed.

I just need it to be
in a way where I feel like

I have some sense of control.

Okay. I don't
know what that means.

Okay, me neither.

So, that's what
I'm trying to figure out.

- All right. Let's go to bed.
- Okay, fine.

I need rules
for my sleepover with Tommy

because I don't
know him well enough.

And I also don't
want to do that to Edgar.

We probably are going
to stay up talking all night

and just hanging out.

Rawr.

I've been going through a lot.

But I realized that
I was only thinking of myself.

And taking Ash for granted.

I haven't been able to admit it.

And I'm really... afraid...

that the damage
has already been done.

You okay?

Do you want to be swarmed
in some love right now?

Holy shit.

I need to be open about it.

Because if I'm not,

then I'm denying myself...

true healing and progress.

What's going on?

I haven't been
completely honest, you know?

Since I started dating Ash,

I have slept with other people,

and I've literally
lied about it already.

I've been asked,
"Have you ever cheated on Ash?"

And I said no.

Wow.

That's huge.

And I even say that.
"I've been an asshole,

I've been a jerk."

But I don't admit that
I'm still doing that. You know?

- Hey.
- Hey, what's up?

I just wanted to clear
the air about yesterday.

So, I do think my blow-up
was necessary to send a message.

Might not have been pretty,
but it was needed.

So that was
kind of frustrating because

I felt like I did wait around
and I never got that shot.

You did kind of,
like, mislead me.

Liv and Alexa coming up to me

to trying
to speak their piece...

He's saying
one thing, doing another,

giving you false hope.

Going back to
what I already addressed

and apologized for.

I'd love to just, like,
mention the points that

we were trying to get across.

Saying the same thing
over and over. It's annoying.

I thought we got past this?

I know, but obviously
you didn't handle

I think the first
few days the right way.

Back to the same shit.

You know,
it didn't seem genuine.

- I agree.
- Yes. And I think...

This is crazy.
It's lasting so long too.

I think you just have to own up.

There's 12 girls,
like, people are talking,

things get brought up...
misleading me.

Like, I'm not crazy
for you misleading me.

Just because
you're not happy with

this answer doesn't mean you get
to keep talking about it.

You can't keep going back to
the past and trying to fix that.

And I don't want to talk
about it anymore, either.

I think...

We're good.
We're good. We're good.

I feel like that
didn't get anywhere.

No, I feel like you
kind of did go in circles.

So today, I have
a whole picnic out here in sun.

Last night
from what Ashley told me,

Lascelles can never even
opened up to her emotionally.

So, I want to show her what

I believe that she
needs in her life

and what I need in my life,
which is her.

I want to show you
something I got planned for you.

You're making me nervous.

No, no. You don't need
to be nervous about this.

You can open up your eyes.

A romantic date.

This is so cute!

Oh, my God.

- Let's have a seat.
- Yes.

This is like the romance that

I am missing in my relationship
with Lascelles.

- Want a bite?
- Yeah.

And I can't wait to really get
to know Blake on a deeper level.

I want to get to know, like,
what do you... what do you look

for, like, in a relationship?

Now I'm starting
to realize that I need

appreciation in so many forms.

Like, for you, it's romantic
dates and the little comments

that you...

That you
give me are really sweet.

The relationship
that I'm in right now,

I feel like
that's what I'm missing.

I don't know if he's feeling
sad or he'll never show crying,

or... there was
like no emotional...

like, connection, I would say.

Do you feel like
it was there at the beginning

and then just kind of lost?

I feel like it was
never there to begin with.

I didn't want to, like,
make you sad here or anything.

I did want
to open up a lot more.

It's like, you're
easy to open up to.

Easy to talk to, for sure.

Thank you.

I'll definitely
cherish this moment forever.

I'm happy.
I'm happy you're happy.

Yeah.

Aw, you're the best.

- What's up, everybody?
- Hi, Mark!

Can you all join me on the lawn?

We've got a little bit
of business to take care of.

- Ooh, I am excited.
- Gentlemen, you too.

What is Mark doing here?

Any time Mark walks in,
there's a lot of emotions.

Why don't stand right over here?

Your nerves get a little antsy.

You don't really
know what's gonna happen

and what we're going to come
back to at the end of the night.

- See you on the other side.
- Okay.

Right now...
is time for an elimination.

Five single men will
be leaving the island today.

Gentlemen, I'm talking to you

because you'll
pick which five of you

you think should leave
the island.

- Oh...
- Oh, God.

That's right. This elimination,
you're in control.

I hope they
choose the right person.

I hope they know.

As you can see,
there are pegs here

and you'll have five rings.
And you simply place the ring

on the peg that corresponds with

the single guy that you
think should leave the island.

So, we'll start
with you, Ray Rock.

Are you serious?

Like, we have the power?

We, first time in
Temptation Island history.

We have the power
to send each other home?

Oh, my God.

Definitely feeling
the pressure of going first.

Oh, God.

This is rough, Mark.

I know.

This is rough.

Evan, you're next.

All right, all right.
Here we go.

How are they
supposed to know what

we think and what we
feel or what we want?

They don't care what we want.

I voted for Taylor because...

- Appreciate it, bro.
- I understand

the competition aspect of it.

And you know,
I'm safe in my picks.

I'm thinking
about the girls first

because it's about them
and whoever they connect with.

So that's why
I'm voting for Evan.

I feel that
he can't really produce

anything for the house
or for them.

Shit, bro.

These guys
want me off the island.

The connections that are
currently building are obvious.

It seems that some of

the guys here
might feel intimidated

or even maybe jealous.

James, you're up, buddy.

Tommy.

Smart, bro.

Brian. Last but not least.

Are they jealous?

All right.

Gentlemen, so the five guys

that you have decided it's time

for them to leave
the island are... Brian,

Andrew, Mike M,

Evan and Taylor.

So, will the five of you
please step forward.

Watching Taylor's name

get voted to go home,
I feel absolute...

devastation.

Taylor, unfortunately you've
been voted to be eliminated

by the other singles.

I had a great time
getting to know each

and every one of you.

I hope the best

and I'm so happy to have been
here with y'all.

There's one more
thing I should mention.

Ladies, right now you
have an opportunity

to make a move here.

- Okay.
- Yes. Yes, yes.

All right,
so here's how this works.

It's gonna be okay.

You have three options, okay?

You can either save one

of the singles who has
been eliminated by their peers.

You could swap one of them out

for somebody
you'd like to see go home

in place of somebody else.

Or you may decide
to agree with the vote

that the boys did.

- We know.
- We know.

- You know?
- Yeah.

- You all agree?
- Yes.

- Okay.
- We're gonna save Taylor.

You're going to
save Taylor. Okay.

I'm nothing but thankful.

My God.

Right when Mark announced

that they have choices,
from Ash's reaction to it,

I instantly
knew I was getting saved.

There was no doubt in my mind.

Gentlemen, thank you
for all that you've contributed.

Your time on
the island ends now.

Hey, Mike, I love you, man.

It is very
shocking that a lot of

the guys that didn't
really make moves on girls

got to stay.
And, you know,

I really made an attempt to make

a genuine connection
with quite a few of the girls.

But whether I intimidate some
of the guys or I'm competition

or whatever
it is, it's all love.

Guys, we are in it now.

Make every moment
count and enjoy your night.

- Thanks, Mark.
- Thank you, Mark.

Bye, girls, I'll see you soon.

The eliminations put some
stuff into perspective for me

and Taylor. I couldn't
imagine the house without him.

Five single ladies will
be up for elimination today.

Ladies, I'm actually
talking to you.

Because you'll decide which
five of you will be going home.

- Mark!
- Got it?

Oh, my God.

Wow, that's half of us.

I'm going to cry.

No, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

I'm shitting my pants because

I haven't gone on a date yet.

And the guy that I was going to

made it very
clear he wants Trace.

So, I'm kind of nervous.

Juicy...

- Don't make me go first.
- You got this.

Eliminations
are crucial in this process

because it weeds out
the people who aren't here

for the right reasons
or don't have a connection.

I can't do this.

I'm sorry.
I'm doing it. Sorry.

Paige, you're next.

Okay.

All right.

I'm really trying to keep
a great relationship with Luke.

I just don't need a blonde
little speed bump in the way.

Alexa, you're next.

Mark.

Thanks, Alexa.

- Ready, Meghan?
- No.

Bri, you're the last voter.

The last one. Okay.

I love you, Paige.

And Liv.

Okay, ladies, you voted

and the five single ladies
that you've decided have come

to an end of
their time here are...

Reilly...

Excuse me.

- Bri.
- Yep.

Emily.

Meghan.

And Olivia.

Gentlemen, right now,

you have
the opportunity to make a move.

You can either
save one of the singles

who's been voted off,

swap one of them
out for somebody else,

or you could
agree with the vote that

the ladies came up with.

Why don't you take a moment,
put your heads together

and we'll see what you think.

I just don't know.

How do you guys feel
about Meghan leaving?

Like, I was about
to go on a date with her.

If we save Liv or Meghan,
I would vote to swap.

- What do you guys think?
- Like, I...

Hania, tell
us what you've all decided.

We have decided to make a swap.

Meghan, we would
like to see more from you.

Guys...

Alexa, we all agree
that it's time to go.

Mm-hmm.

Okay, Meghan, you can take your
place back up on the podium.

Ladies, thank you so
much for your contribution.

It is now time
for you to leave the island.

And you're free to go.

Thank you.
We love you.

There definitely
was a big plot twist.

I came here and I was
most interested in Lascelles.

I expressed that.
The first few days,

I don't think he handled
the situation the right way.

And honestly,
I think he's going to leave

his girlfriend for her.

I just don't know
if that's going to be

the end all, be all.

Appreciate you, and I'll check

in with you guys very soon.
Okay?

- Thanks, Mark.
- Thanks, Mark.

There's been a lot
of tension between Alexa and I.

So, I think it's
the proper thing to do to save

my current relationship
with Trace.

We're getting groovy, baby!

It's the '70s, baby.

And we're getting funky tonight.

I'm getting sweaty.

Honestly, the date
I had today was eye opening.

It was definitely a difficult
decision to send people home,

but I need
to destress from this situation.

Let's go have a party.

I'm a fun ass party girl.

And something that I've
realized in my relationship,

is that I don't have
to feel apologetic for it.

And I don't have to worry about
Luke's insecurities because

I can party respectfully,

have a great-ass time,

and I know that I'm
still being true to myself

and my relationship.

So, Tommy kissed me
because I think he felt

the time was right,
which I won't disagree with.

And he's a pretty good kisser.

And I enjoyed the kiss.

The bond between me

and Taylor has definitely
evolved after eliminations.

We're a lot less hesitant

towards each other now.

We were both really
not ready to be separated.

All right everybody,
listen up, listen up.

I got to announce
the Mardi Gras queen.

Who is it?

I needed someone
who brought the energy

- and was having fun.
- Yes. Come on now.

The Mardi Gras queen...

Miss Iris!

She showed the most sexiness.

She got out of her shell tonight
and I like that, I like it.

Yo, it's the Queen
of the Mardi Gras right here.

That party was so lit
and I felt free.

I had so much fun tonight.
I think everyone did.

Bow down, bitches.

Luke?

Yo. I don't know why I'm so
just easily triggered

with crying right now.

I'm literally looking out at
sunsets and just breaking down.

We're glad you're crying now.

I just need to work on myself.

That's the thing.

That's huge.
Like, I definitely... I agree.

I think that
that was a big thing.

Like, we want you to open up
and it's okay to not be okay.

Being in this house,

I'm realizing that in the past,

whenever I had any
feelings of emotion come up,

I would immediately
just suppress them.

I'm learning how to be
emotionally open and available.

But, I mean,

I just hope it's not too late...

for Iris.

Being able to hug people longer,

love them better,
say "I love you" more...

These are the things
that I've been lacking.

Yeah.

- I was coasting.
- Yeah.

And...

You sure as hell
aren't coasting anymore.

Karyna is my girlfriend
for the time being.

So, in order to fully
date Ash at the end of this,

in order to show
her how much I love her,

I need to know just how
to do that with one person.

And right now, that's Karyna.

I'm not trying to cross a line.

Out of respect to you,

and out of respect to her.

And like, out
of respect to myself.

But also, like, I'd be lying

if I didn't say that I didn't
feel things for you.

But, like, you have
a girlfriend.

That's like a huge, like...

Marissa, the way I feel
about you is really genuine.

- It scares the shit out of me.
- I know.

- I'm nervous.
- Okay.

Not because you make me nervous,

but because I'm nervous
about the way I feel about you.

Sometimes I wonder,

me feeling
these things for Marissa,

if that's like breaking a rule.

An unspoken rule.

I'm not going to throw
myself into something that

I don't fully believe in.

I just want to make
sure that we're both taking

things, like... slow.

That's all.

Maybe we just... separate.

Yeah? Oh, so you're
going to sleep in your bunk bed?

Oh, here we go.

Tell me, what do you want?

Tommy and I had a great night,
but we're not done.

I don't see why
we shouldn't enjoy

each other's company tonight.

You want me to stay?

Okay, I'll stay.

Yeah, I don't really know
what happens next with Gillian.

I definitely think she's feeling
more comfortable with me.

I think we're just
going to take it day by day

and enjoy
the time we have together.

And enjoy
the stuff we're doing here.

Obviously.

I don't think there
was really an option.

Obviously, me and Ash
have something going on.

She's a really good soul
and I genuinely care for her

as a person.

Things are moving very fast

and I'm ready to keep it going.

The blond-haired, blue eyed
Norse god, that is Taylor,

he's tempting every
single time I look at him.

So, he made it easy
for me to give myself to him.

So, you're full of energy today.

I'm full of energy today.

Ah!

I am feeling
really good this morning.

After last night,

Taylor has made me feel safe.

I feel adored.

His affection
and attention has brought back

all of that feeling I needed.

And I don't want to spend time
with anyone but him.

Wow.

Let's just leave me
dizzy and out of breath.

me.

Okay.

Bonfires are a big deal here,

because it's the one
moment that we get to see

how our partners are doing.

And when you love someone,

you believe that they
will grow and change and evolve

and be wonderful,
beautiful people.

But seeing Gillian kiss anyone
besides me would hurt a lot.

Gentlemen,
welcome to another bonfire.

I know the further
we get into this,

these bonfires get
more and more emotional.

That's because the purpose
of the bonfire is

to face the truth,
whatever that is.

So, we're going
to get right into it. Okay?

Lascelles, we'll start with you.

Let's go.

The relationship
that I'm in right now,

I don't know if he's feeling sad

or he'll never show crying or...

There's no emotional...

like, connection, I would say.

Do you feel like it was
there at the beginning

and just kind of lost?

I feel like it was never there

to begin with.

You wanna tell me what you saw?

Mm-hmm. Um...

There's truth there.

You know, Ashley's never
seen me really that emotional

and... I'm not sure why.

I think it's just never...
Anything that triggered me

to show emotion.

Why do you think
you've gotten emotional here,

and in seven years,
the complaint is

that you... you don't feel it?

I just never had that
moment or those times where

I can just lock in
and just say, I feel it.

I just think about how much

I want to sacrifice
to make her happy.

They always say,
like that old cliché,

on the plane, you put
the oxygen mask on you first.

And it's really true, dude.
I mean, you're out of air.

Okay. Luke.

- Yes, sir.
- The new Luke.

- Luke 2.0.
- We're trying.

We're getting there.

Right now, what is,
is we're going to watch a clip.

Okay?

Hey!

Tevin!

Go Iris!

Mardi Gras Queen,

Miss Iris!

Okay.

I'm happy to see
that she's letting loose

a little bit and growing,

and I think that's
exactly what I'm trying to do.

She's just having fun
here and I know I'm just

focusing on myself
right now, Mark.

You're experiencing
the joy of feeling emotions.

I'm just happy that I can feel.

Make up for lost time?

I'm happy.
I'm excited to see this new me.

So, these
are kind of tears of joy,

and I'm happy
that I can look at this clip

and see Iris just,
you know, have fun.

And I'm not
jealous about it either.

I'm really proud of you.

Edgar?

- Hey.
- Let's go.

What are you thinking, Edgar?

Obviously, it hurts...

to see her be intimate.

Like, the past year and a half,

I've had a feeling
that maybe I love her

a little more than she loves me.

Yeah.

And she'll look at me in my eyes

and be like, "I love you, Edgar.

And I'm sure of that,

that I want to have
a life with you at some point."

And it's just like,
"I just don't think you are.

"I think you're
lying to yourself."

I put all of
my importance on her.

And my... my... my...

My friends, they express
that to me, they said, "Yo, Ed.

"You're spending
a lot of time with her, man.

"Like, what about us?

"Like, we were there for you
before she ever existed."

And...

I was like,
"Oh, guys, but I'm in love."

Mm-hmm.

It's painful. This is part
of the truth being painful.

And I think
we all feel your pain.

Sorry, brother.

So, where do you go from here?

I don't know Gillian.
I don't know who she is now.

And I don't want that anymore.

That's not easy to say
out loud, and I appreciate you.

Hania, ready?

- I am.
- Let's go.

I don't know what to say, Mark.

I mean, nobody
wants to watch this.

And even if you do
have an open relationship,

which is something that
I thought I would be open to,

and now know
is something I do not want,

I realized that I have
been taking Ash for granted,

and so I need
to stop doing that.

It is a fear that perhaps
she will find somebody

she connects with more than me.

I need to focus
on that relationship

and not all
of the relationships.

I need to be
present for that person,

not be thinking about

the other women
I'm sleeping with,

when I'm with the person I love.

I want you to leave
this island in a better place.

Mm-hmm.

Every single one
of you is growing by leaps

and bounds right
in front of my eyes.

You can head back to your villas

and I'll see you
really soon. Okay?

- Thank you, Mark.
- All right, guys.

I'm having a really hard time.

"Ash, don't do this to me."
That's what I'm thinking.

That's what I'm feeling.

She asked me
to come here for a reason,

and I'm discovering
what that reason is.

Going into this bonfire,

I feel very scared and nervous.

I feel like Lascelles may
form this strong connection

with a girl,
and that could lead to me

not forgiving what
his choices are.

Hello, friends.

Hi.

I know the further
we get into this,

these bonfires get
more and more emotional.

That's because the purpose
of the bonfire is to face

the truth, no matter
how ugly that may be. Right?

Ash, we're
going to start with you.

Thank God.

- Thank God, you said?
- Yeah.

Okay. Let's watch together.

I haven't been
completely honest, you know?

Since I started
dating Ash, I have

slept with other people.

Tell me what you saw
and what you're feeling.

I'm so relieved
to know I'm not stupid.

I do know he slept with
other people. I sensed it.

Could that
be some sort of epiphany

or growth that
he might be going through?

I hope that
it is a sign of growth.

I just...

He's not getting the same
version of me back, either.

The blossoms on
my tree are becoming fruit,

and he's just
beginning to blossom.

I want to remind
you that we discussed

at the very beginning that none
of you will be the same people.

I just need
people who want to see

me grow as much as
I want to see them grow.

All right.
Good for you. Iris.

- Mm-hmm.
- You're next.

Sometimes it makes you
feel better to cry a little bit.

I really didn't know
what I wanted.

I know.

But at least letting

the flood gates out
allows you to realize

that you don't know.

And that you can kind of
start searching for it.

Yeah.

Wow, he cried.

It looks like you
might be crying, too.

No, I actually feel proud of him
for getting to that level.

I almost feel like
him and I are kind of in

the same place right now.

In what sense?

I've just come to realize, like,

how much I love
being my own individual.

Like, last night,
I had so much fun,

just, like, partying
and dancing on my own,

still dancing with the guys,

but knowing,
like, I was there for me.

And I wasn't
disrespecting my relationship.

But I've been afraid
to let my fun side show.

What's it like
to meet this woman?

I feel free.

And I don't think
I've ever felt free,

like I have right now.

Great.

Let's go to you, Ashley.

- Yes, let's do it.
- All right.

Here we go.

Been thinking about Ashley.

I think we'll
need to take a break.

I want to explore
this individual journey more.

You've been a big,
big part of my development.

You treat me a special way.

I get special treatment
from you. I know that.

I am only romantically
interested in Trace.

So, no one else approach me.

I'm only going
to talk to Trace now.

I feel like if a break
is needed in order to help us

grow later on or in
order to have more self-love

for ourselves,
then a break is okay.

But that would have
to come with a discussion.

So, I'm on the path
where I got to figure out what

I like to do,
who Ashley is, what do I love?

When was the last time

you did exactly
what you wanted to do?

A long time.

Definitely not recently.

If you can't remember
the last time you did

exactly what you wanted to do,

you've been hurting
yourself at a far more

egregious level
than you think you have.

Under the guise of "comfort."

That's a miserable life.

I don't want that.

I say you get to have all

the joy that
you can possibly imagine,

and you haven't allowed
yourself to imagine any of it.

Regardless of who you think
has an opinion about it,

you deserve
every bit of that joy.

Gillian.

Gillian, what the?

If you're not in this,

then why the did
you drag me all this way?

I love you.

But if you don't love me,
then leave me alone.

Leave me the alone.

I hate that
he's in so much pain.

I can definitely see
that he's really hurting.

How do you feel?

I feel...

guilty.

I feel like I'm a bad person.

I feel like I've been
dishonest with myself.

And therefore I've been
dishonest with Edgar.

And it wasn't coming from

a place
of intentional dishonesty,

but just trying
to protect myself, protect him,

protect what we've built.

What's the lie
you've been telling yourself?

That I want a future with Edgar.

The work is about you.

You'll have plenty of time
to worry about Edgar,

when it's time
to worry about Edgar.

It's your time now.

Listen.

My hope is that all of you leave

in a better place
than when you came here.

And I think you're
well on your way to that.

So, good work ladies.

You can head back to your villa
and I'll see you very soon.

And thank you.

Thank you, Mark.

Tonight's bonfire was definitely
the worst of all for me.

It felt like a knife
in the back to hear that

Edgar was saying to leave him
the alone.

I want Edgar to understand
that all of the things

that are happening
with me in the house

are not because
I'm trying to purposely

put him through pain.

What I'm really
trying to do is explore

a new-found independence,

me finding myself.