Taxi (1978–1983): Season 1, Episode 19 - Mama Gravas - full transcript
Latka's mother comes to visit from their home country but since Louie canceled his day off to fix 3 taxis,Latka asks Alex to keep his mother company until he gets off work. Alex ends up with more than he expected when Ms. Gravas & himself end up in bed together. Latka,after hearing about this,thinks that she & Alex are going to be a couple but is shocked when told it was just a one time thing. Latka is now angry with Alex & mama and decides he will not speak to him again.
Latka, nice threads.
Oh? Thank you
very much.
You like?
You can keep.
Hey, Latka, how come
you're so dressed up?
Well, because my mother
is visiting today
from the old country.
Oh! Hey!
Oh! Hey!
You must really be excited.
When does her plane land?
Right at the end of flight.
Good, good, very good.
She coming today
from the airport.
She coming right here.
Louie give me rest of day off
so I could show her
around the Big Banana.
Latka, I think you mean
The Big Apple.
Oh, that, too.
Latka, three cabs just
came in that need repairs.
What are you doing in
these glad rags?
Because you said
I could have the day off.
Forget it, I got a garage
to run here.
Yeah, but, Louie, you promised.
Right, I promised,
now I'm breaking my promise.
Get back to work.
You are a nasty man.
I'm not nasty.
A lot of guys
wouldn't have given
you the day off
in the first place.
Go on, go on.
Hey, come on, Louie.
His mother's coming
to visit him.
I'm not doing this
because I enjoy it.
I do enjoy it,
but that's not the reason.
Now get back to work!
( speaking native language )
I'll pretend
I didn't hear that.
Hey, Latka.
Very sorry about this.
Is there anything
I can do to help?
Yes.
When my mama comes,
you could take her
to Mario's for eat.
I will come later.
Oh. I, uh... I just got
off a 14-hour shift,
and I-I thought I'd just go home
and try to get some sleep.
Please, please, Alex.
Poor little Mama,
she want to see America
before she die.
Latka, I'm sorry, I'd like to
help, but I'm really very tired.
I mean, uh... Hey, wait
a minute, wait a minute.
It's Tony's day off today.
Hey, Tony, can I
ask you a question?
Sure.
Please.
Mama, my mama!
Oh, Latka.
( speaking native language )
What did you want
to ask me, Alex?
Huh?
Oh, how you doing?
Good.
Yeah, it was nice
talking to you.
I think I got a date
for breakfast.
What are you
going to have?
Well, something
American.
What have you?
Uh, pizza, spaghetti, chili...
and the special
of the day is chop suey.
Yes.
Why don't you bring us
a couple of hamburgers, Tommy?
Coming right up.
So, Mrs. Gravas, when did
you get into New York?
This morning.
Have seen nothing.
Hear much about
New York City.
Oh?Many things want to see.
Yeah? Like what?
Oh, garbage strike,
blackout, urban blight.
I'll find out when
the next tour is.
Oh, also want to see
Yankee Dog Stadium.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, you shouldn't miss that.
You know, you talk
very good English.
You, too.
I learn English
from phrase book.
Well, you learned
your phrases very well.
Oh, you're welcome.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
You're welcome from me, too.
Oh, try this.
No thirsty.
Mrs. Gravas, I, um, I hope
this isn't too personal,
but, uh, you know,
I was really very surprised
to see how young you are.
Oh, my, my, you're welcome.
I marry Latka's father when 15.
He killed two years later.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Oh, you're welcome.
He die in struggle
for liberty and freedom.
Oh, he was a freedom fighter
shot by police?
No, he was a police
shot by freedom fighter.
I, uh, I just can't believe
that you never remarried.
I mean, you really are a very,
uh, attractive woman.
( chuckling )
And you're a very nice man,
Mr. Reiger.
( chuckling )
Well, thank you, Mrs. Gravas.
I am Greta.
Okay, I'm Alex.
Like Alexander?
Right.
( cracking up )
( laughing uneasily )
What?
In my country, Alexander mean...
...one who makes nik-nik
during harvest.
Well, that's me all right.
And, uh, what does Greta mean?
Oh, means pretty.
It fits.
And yours fits, too.
It's not even harvest. Ha, ha.
Hi, everybody.
Hi, Latka.
Hi.
How are you, Mama?
Mmm.
( speaking
native language )
Mm. I can only
stay a minute
because many cabs
are broke.
Oh, Alex...
this is for you--
two tickets to Rockettes.
Mm.
I was going to take Mama,
but, uh, so busy.
Rockets?
Oh, no, no, no.
Eh...
( speaking native language )
( humming cancan music )
So you use them, Alex.
Well, thank you
very much, Latka.
Right. You can take girlfriend.
What about your mother?
She don't have a girlfriend.
So tell me, Mama,
how is Grishmel?
( speaking native language )
Oh, eh... and how is Triska?
( speaking native language )
Oh...
( speaking native language )
Eh, how is Schmopsy?
Schmopsy cookypoots.
( speaking native language )
Oh.
( speaking native language )
How is Lurgid?
( speaking native language )
Oh!
It's always nice to get
the news from home.
How come every time
I get an apple
out of the machine,
it's old and mushy?
Don't they ever put any
new apples in this machine?
Uh, yeah, they put new apples
in that machine,
uh, but in order to get
to the new apples,
you have to eat
the old apples first,
be-because the old
apples are so old,
very few people
eat them.
So, by the time you get
to the new apples,
they're old apples.
So then all we gotta do
is eat more apples.
We'll eat right
through the old ones
and get to the new ones.
Except that
if we all start
to eat the old apples,
the apple man
will think we like old apples
and he'll never put
any new apples in the machine.
So then how do we get
new apples, John?
We can't.
ALEX:
Hi.
BOBBY:
Hey, Alex.
How did your date go
with Latka's mama?
It wasn't a date.
Latka had these tickets
to a show,
so I went and, uh, she went.
It was sort of like,
you know, uh, two people
being at the same place
at the same time, uh,
together. That's all.
Well, whatever it was,
how did it go?
Fine, just fine.
She sure is attractive.
Who?
Oh, Mrs. Gravas? Yeah.
Gee, imagine
having a mother
who's that
good-looking.
You guys
talking about me?
You?
Yeah, my mom's good-looking.
Very handsome
figure of a woman.
If she'd just stop wearing those
black dresses all the time...
shed a few pounds...
get rid of the wart
and the mustache.
Hi, guys.
Hi.Hey.
Hey, uh, Elaine,
you got a minute?
Sure.
Um, I want, I want
to ask you something.
I, um...
Elaine, listen.
What would, uh...
what would you think of a guy
who, uh...
kind of got friendly
with the mother
of a buddy of his?
Oh, that depends
how friendly.
Shockingly friendly.
Offhand, I'd say it was a
pretty crummy thing to do.
No, no, wait,
now listen, um...
What if, what if the
guy didn't plan it?
You know what I mean? What if
it just sort of happened?
In fact, what if the
mother, well, uh...
forced herself on the guy?
Forced herself?Yeah.
I mean, what'd she do, like
throw him down and pin him
to the floor?
Kind of, yeah.
Elaine, listen, uh...
I'm talking about me
and Latka's mother.
Latka's mother?!
Uh... yeah. She flew in
yesterday from the old country.
Just for that?
Huh? No, no, no.
She flew in to see Latka.
Wow! You and
Latka's mother!
Please.How old is she?
About six-foot-three.
Look, she-she happens to be
a very attractive woman.
Look, Latka gave us
tickets to a show.
We went to the
Radio City Music Hall,
and afterwards out
for a bite to eat
and she wanted to come up
to my place for a drink.
Well, look,Oh, now...
no, I had no idea
what was gonna happen.
I mean, I don't think
she did either.
Just one of those things,
you know what I mean?
You mean,
you actually...
Elaine, I couldn't help it.
I really couldn't help it.
After we were alone for a while,
she turned into an animal.
A great one.
She started to rip my shirt.
She ripped my raincoat.
Latka's mother?!
Quiet, will you?
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Look, there-there's no reason
for you to feel guilty.
I don't, but it just
bothers me that
if Latka found out about it,
it would really hurt him.
Oh, well, that's simple.
If I were you, I'd just make
sure he never finds out.
Hmm.
LATKA:
Alex?
Alex Reiger?
If I were you,
I'd think of
something else.
Um...
Alex, I must talk
to you man-to-face.
Yes.
Yes, Latka.
Last night, Mama
come home very late.
Yes, I-I know. I know.
And I ask her
where she been.
She did not
want to tell me,
but I make her.
She told you everything?
Everything.
Oh, listen, Latka,
please, I can explain.
You don't need
to explain... Daddy.
I think we really have
to talk about this, Latka.
You know, Alex,
if there was anyone
in the world for me
to choose for my father,
I would choose you.
Oh, well, that's
really very nice.
Latka, come over here
and pick up your work order.
Okay, coming, Louie.
See you later, Papa.
Hey, Alex, you and Latka's
mother getting serious?
Of course not.
Hello, Alexander.
It's not what
you're thinking.
No, it's probably
a lot better.
Uh, You guys got
something better to do?
No.
Then do it!
We are going to be
so happy together.
Mama cook, Alex read paper,
I mow the lawn, oh...
( speaking native language )
Can I have a puppy?
Latka, what
you speak?
I no marry Alex.
No, no, no,
of course not.
Look, Latka, your mother's
is a wonderful woman,
but I... I don't
want to marry her.
What! No marry?
No, ( speaking
native language )
But, Mama, if you play
nik-nik with Alex,
then you must marry.
It's the only way
to save the family honor.
Oh, goat droppings.
No marry.
No goat
droppings.
You... you must.
No.
Yes.
No.
If you don't
marry Alex,
then you're...
you're a kakbort.
Mama!
Latka, ( speaking
native language )
( speaking native language )
( continues speaking
native language )
I'm sorry, Mama.
Ooh... ( speaking
native language )
It's okay, Alex.
Oh, uh, what did you tell him?
She told me how
lonely she'd been
since father died
and I forgive her.
Hey, that's terrific, Latka.
But you, Mr. Reiger,
you, I never forgive.
We are no longer friends.
Sorry, Alex.
Latka...
Latka, Latka.
Look!
I don't know what's exactly
going on here, Reiger,
and I don't want
to make a judgment
about who's right
and who's wrong.
But I just want you
to remember one thing:
My mother's
off-limits.
Hello, Latka.
Hello.
I was looking
all over for you.
That so?
How you doing?
What's it to me?
Can I sit down?
Free country.
Latka, I think
we have to talk.
I know what you're
going to say.
( speaking native language )
I wanted to say that, um...
I'm deeply sorry
that you were hurt
by what happened
between your mother and me.
I knew it.
Look, Latka, what your mother
and I did was indiscreet.
You mean,
not even indoors?
No, no, no, no, no.
Latka, look, what
I'm trying to say is
that I know through your eyes
what happened between
your mother and me was wrong.
But what happened between
a woman by the name of Greta
Gravas and me was not wrong.
May I?
( grunting )
What is that?
Brefinish. I make myself.
Make a good anti-freeze,
let me tell you.
No, eats... eats the pipes.
Oh!
Look, Latka, Latka,
what do you say...
What do you say
we just shake hands, okay?
Okay.
Then we're
friends again?
No, no, not friends.
We just shook hands,
that makes us friends,
doesn't it?
Not in my country.
Only one thing means
friendship between two men--
when they do this
to each other.
I guess that seems
a lot friendlier
than shaking hands.
Latka, why can't
you forgive me?
Because you have shamed
the name of Gravas.
Was it that bad?
Look, why you do this?
I would not do it
to your mother.
My mother's 67 years old.
Then not do for sure.
Latka, look, I like you.
I... to be friends
with you again.
Well, I like you,
too, Alex,
but we can never
be friends.
What are you
talking about?
We work in the same place.
We see each other every day.
Come on, you'll
get over this.
Of course we can
be friends again.
No.
You mean to say that we'll
never go to breakfast
with each other ever again?
Never.
We'll never be able to play
poker together ever again?
Never.
You'll never come
to my house
to watch football?
No, never.
( sniffling )
Not even when the Dallas
cheerleaders are on?
( sobbing )
I sorry, Alex,
we cannot be friends.
It's a question of honor.
Without honor, a man is nothing.
I'm sorry, but this
is how it must be.
There's nothing I can
do to change that?
Nothing.
Well, I guess
that's it, then.
Good-bye, Latka.
Good-bye.
( sighs )
Wait!
Maybe is one solution.
What?
You and I could globnik.
What?
Well, is custom in my country,
when two friends cannot agree,
they globnik.
Well, what does that mean?
It's hard to explain.
Here, look it up.
Globnik?
Globnik.
Glbonik.
Garfnog, giffort...
glab, globnik.
Here it is, globnik.
"From glob, to disappear.
"Intransitive verb.
To pretend or assume some event
or occurrence never took place."
You think that would do it?
I mean, just pretend
it never happened?
Pretend what never happened?
Beats me.
Me, too.
Well, back to work.
Yep, I'll, um...
I'll, I'll see you.
Okay, bye.
Okay, Latka, your deal.
Thank you
very much.
Latka love poker.
Abbee, abbee, abbee, abbee,
dabbee, dabbee, dabbee, dabbee,
eicky, eicky, eicky, eicky,
bicky, bicky, bicky, bicky,
eh... sappee, sappee,
sappee, sappee.
I'll take dabbee.
Okay, uh, abbee, dabbee.
BOBBY:
Give me dabbee.
Abbee, dabbee.
Eicky for me.
Abbee, dabbee, eicky.
And dealer take bicky.
Abbee, dabbee,
eicky, bicky.
Okay, I open one kripkee.
I'm in.
I see your kripkee
and I raise a kebel.
Okay, big shots, I see you
and raise ten kebels.
Hey, get this, Latka.
I bet he's drawing
to an inside rebelyek.
I'll see that.
Yeah, yeah, I'm in.
Call.
Okay. What you
got, Bobby?
Yeah, what do
you got, Bobby?
A pair of dorfnickis.
I just missed my royal pipik.
All right,
three yadabis.
Hold it!
A full flerm.
Full ferm?
( theme music playing )
WOMAN:
Good night, Mr. Walters.
( Walters grunts )
Oh? Thank you
very much.
You like?
You can keep.
Hey, Latka, how come
you're so dressed up?
Well, because my mother
is visiting today
from the old country.
Oh! Hey!
Oh! Hey!
You must really be excited.
When does her plane land?
Right at the end of flight.
Good, good, very good.
She coming today
from the airport.
She coming right here.
Louie give me rest of day off
so I could show her
around the Big Banana.
Latka, I think you mean
The Big Apple.
Oh, that, too.
Latka, three cabs just
came in that need repairs.
What are you doing in
these glad rags?
Because you said
I could have the day off.
Forget it, I got a garage
to run here.
Yeah, but, Louie, you promised.
Right, I promised,
now I'm breaking my promise.
Get back to work.
You are a nasty man.
I'm not nasty.
A lot of guys
wouldn't have given
you the day off
in the first place.
Go on, go on.
Hey, come on, Louie.
His mother's coming
to visit him.
I'm not doing this
because I enjoy it.
I do enjoy it,
but that's not the reason.
Now get back to work!
( speaking native language )
I'll pretend
I didn't hear that.
Hey, Latka.
Very sorry about this.
Is there anything
I can do to help?
Yes.
When my mama comes,
you could take her
to Mario's for eat.
I will come later.
Oh. I, uh... I just got
off a 14-hour shift,
and I-I thought I'd just go home
and try to get some sleep.
Please, please, Alex.
Poor little Mama,
she want to see America
before she die.
Latka, I'm sorry, I'd like to
help, but I'm really very tired.
I mean, uh... Hey, wait
a minute, wait a minute.
It's Tony's day off today.
Hey, Tony, can I
ask you a question?
Sure.
Please.
Mama, my mama!
Oh, Latka.
( speaking native language )
What did you want
to ask me, Alex?
Huh?
Oh, how you doing?
Good.
Yeah, it was nice
talking to you.
I think I got a date
for breakfast.
What are you
going to have?
Well, something
American.
What have you?
Uh, pizza, spaghetti, chili...
and the special
of the day is chop suey.
Yes.
Why don't you bring us
a couple of hamburgers, Tommy?
Coming right up.
So, Mrs. Gravas, when did
you get into New York?
This morning.
Have seen nothing.
Hear much about
New York City.
Oh?Many things want to see.
Yeah? Like what?
Oh, garbage strike,
blackout, urban blight.
I'll find out when
the next tour is.
Oh, also want to see
Yankee Dog Stadium.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, you shouldn't miss that.
You know, you talk
very good English.
You, too.
I learn English
from phrase book.
Well, you learned
your phrases very well.
Oh, you're welcome.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
You're welcome from me, too.
Oh, try this.
No thirsty.
Mrs. Gravas, I, um, I hope
this isn't too personal,
but, uh, you know,
I was really very surprised
to see how young you are.
Oh, my, my, you're welcome.
I marry Latka's father when 15.
He killed two years later.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Oh, you're welcome.
He die in struggle
for liberty and freedom.
Oh, he was a freedom fighter
shot by police?
No, he was a police
shot by freedom fighter.
I, uh, I just can't believe
that you never remarried.
I mean, you really are a very,
uh, attractive woman.
( chuckling )
And you're a very nice man,
Mr. Reiger.
( chuckling )
Well, thank you, Mrs. Gravas.
I am Greta.
Okay, I'm Alex.
Like Alexander?
Right.
( cracking up )
( laughing uneasily )
What?
In my country, Alexander mean...
...one who makes nik-nik
during harvest.
Well, that's me all right.
And, uh, what does Greta mean?
Oh, means pretty.
It fits.
And yours fits, too.
It's not even harvest. Ha, ha.
Hi, everybody.
Hi, Latka.
Hi.
How are you, Mama?
Mmm.
( speaking
native language )
Mm. I can only
stay a minute
because many cabs
are broke.
Oh, Alex...
this is for you--
two tickets to Rockettes.
Mm.
I was going to take Mama,
but, uh, so busy.
Rockets?
Oh, no, no, no.
Eh...
( speaking native language )
( humming cancan music )
So you use them, Alex.
Well, thank you
very much, Latka.
Right. You can take girlfriend.
What about your mother?
She don't have a girlfriend.
So tell me, Mama,
how is Grishmel?
( speaking native language )
Oh, eh... and how is Triska?
( speaking native language )
Oh...
( speaking native language )
Eh, how is Schmopsy?
Schmopsy cookypoots.
( speaking native language )
Oh.
( speaking native language )
How is Lurgid?
( speaking native language )
Oh!
It's always nice to get
the news from home.
How come every time
I get an apple
out of the machine,
it's old and mushy?
Don't they ever put any
new apples in this machine?
Uh, yeah, they put new apples
in that machine,
uh, but in order to get
to the new apples,
you have to eat
the old apples first,
be-because the old
apples are so old,
very few people
eat them.
So, by the time you get
to the new apples,
they're old apples.
So then all we gotta do
is eat more apples.
We'll eat right
through the old ones
and get to the new ones.
Except that
if we all start
to eat the old apples,
the apple man
will think we like old apples
and he'll never put
any new apples in the machine.
So then how do we get
new apples, John?
We can't.
ALEX:
Hi.
BOBBY:
Hey, Alex.
How did your date go
with Latka's mama?
It wasn't a date.
Latka had these tickets
to a show,
so I went and, uh, she went.
It was sort of like,
you know, uh, two people
being at the same place
at the same time, uh,
together. That's all.
Well, whatever it was,
how did it go?
Fine, just fine.
She sure is attractive.
Who?
Oh, Mrs. Gravas? Yeah.
Gee, imagine
having a mother
who's that
good-looking.
You guys
talking about me?
You?
Yeah, my mom's good-looking.
Very handsome
figure of a woman.
If she'd just stop wearing those
black dresses all the time...
shed a few pounds...
get rid of the wart
and the mustache.
Hi, guys.
Hi.Hey.
Hey, uh, Elaine,
you got a minute?
Sure.
Um, I want, I want
to ask you something.
I, um...
Elaine, listen.
What would, uh...
what would you think of a guy
who, uh...
kind of got friendly
with the mother
of a buddy of his?
Oh, that depends
how friendly.
Shockingly friendly.
Offhand, I'd say it was a
pretty crummy thing to do.
No, no, wait,
now listen, um...
What if, what if the
guy didn't plan it?
You know what I mean? What if
it just sort of happened?
In fact, what if the
mother, well, uh...
forced herself on the guy?
Forced herself?Yeah.
I mean, what'd she do, like
throw him down and pin him
to the floor?
Kind of, yeah.
Elaine, listen, uh...
I'm talking about me
and Latka's mother.
Latka's mother?!
Uh... yeah. She flew in
yesterday from the old country.
Just for that?
Huh? No, no, no.
She flew in to see Latka.
Wow! You and
Latka's mother!
Please.How old is she?
About six-foot-three.
Look, she-she happens to be
a very attractive woman.
Look, Latka gave us
tickets to a show.
We went to the
Radio City Music Hall,
and afterwards out
for a bite to eat
and she wanted to come up
to my place for a drink.
Well, look,Oh, now...
no, I had no idea
what was gonna happen.
I mean, I don't think
she did either.
Just one of those things,
you know what I mean?
You mean,
you actually...
Elaine, I couldn't help it.
I really couldn't help it.
After we were alone for a while,
she turned into an animal.
A great one.
She started to rip my shirt.
She ripped my raincoat.
Latka's mother?!
Quiet, will you?
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Look, there-there's no reason
for you to feel guilty.
I don't, but it just
bothers me that
if Latka found out about it,
it would really hurt him.
Oh, well, that's simple.
If I were you, I'd just make
sure he never finds out.
Hmm.
LATKA:
Alex?
Alex Reiger?
If I were you,
I'd think of
something else.
Um...
Alex, I must talk
to you man-to-face.
Yes.
Yes, Latka.
Last night, Mama
come home very late.
Yes, I-I know. I know.
And I ask her
where she been.
She did not
want to tell me,
but I make her.
She told you everything?
Everything.
Oh, listen, Latka,
please, I can explain.
You don't need
to explain... Daddy.
I think we really have
to talk about this, Latka.
You know, Alex,
if there was anyone
in the world for me
to choose for my father,
I would choose you.
Oh, well, that's
really very nice.
Latka, come over here
and pick up your work order.
Okay, coming, Louie.
See you later, Papa.
Hey, Alex, you and Latka's
mother getting serious?
Of course not.
Hello, Alexander.
It's not what
you're thinking.
No, it's probably
a lot better.
Uh, You guys got
something better to do?
No.
Then do it!
We are going to be
so happy together.
Mama cook, Alex read paper,
I mow the lawn, oh...
( speaking native language )
Can I have a puppy?
Latka, what
you speak?
I no marry Alex.
No, no, no,
of course not.
Look, Latka, your mother's
is a wonderful woman,
but I... I don't
want to marry her.
What! No marry?
No, ( speaking
native language )
But, Mama, if you play
nik-nik with Alex,
then you must marry.
It's the only way
to save the family honor.
Oh, goat droppings.
No marry.
No goat
droppings.
You... you must.
No.
Yes.
No.
If you don't
marry Alex,
then you're...
you're a kakbort.
Mama!
Latka, ( speaking
native language )
( speaking native language )
( continues speaking
native language )
I'm sorry, Mama.
Ooh... ( speaking
native language )
It's okay, Alex.
Oh, uh, what did you tell him?
She told me how
lonely she'd been
since father died
and I forgive her.
Hey, that's terrific, Latka.
But you, Mr. Reiger,
you, I never forgive.
We are no longer friends.
Sorry, Alex.
Latka...
Latka, Latka.
Look!
I don't know what's exactly
going on here, Reiger,
and I don't want
to make a judgment
about who's right
and who's wrong.
But I just want you
to remember one thing:
My mother's
off-limits.
Hello, Latka.
Hello.
I was looking
all over for you.
That so?
How you doing?
What's it to me?
Can I sit down?
Free country.
Latka, I think
we have to talk.
I know what you're
going to say.
( speaking native language )
I wanted to say that, um...
I'm deeply sorry
that you were hurt
by what happened
between your mother and me.
I knew it.
Look, Latka, what your mother
and I did was indiscreet.
You mean,
not even indoors?
No, no, no, no, no.
Latka, look, what
I'm trying to say is
that I know through your eyes
what happened between
your mother and me was wrong.
But what happened between
a woman by the name of Greta
Gravas and me was not wrong.
May I?
( grunting )
What is that?
Brefinish. I make myself.
Make a good anti-freeze,
let me tell you.
No, eats... eats the pipes.
Oh!
Look, Latka, Latka,
what do you say...
What do you say
we just shake hands, okay?
Okay.
Then we're
friends again?
No, no, not friends.
We just shook hands,
that makes us friends,
doesn't it?
Not in my country.
Only one thing means
friendship between two men--
when they do this
to each other.
I guess that seems
a lot friendlier
than shaking hands.
Latka, why can't
you forgive me?
Because you have shamed
the name of Gravas.
Was it that bad?
Look, why you do this?
I would not do it
to your mother.
My mother's 67 years old.
Then not do for sure.
Latka, look, I like you.
I... to be friends
with you again.
Well, I like you,
too, Alex,
but we can never
be friends.
What are you
talking about?
We work in the same place.
We see each other every day.
Come on, you'll
get over this.
Of course we can
be friends again.
No.
You mean to say that we'll
never go to breakfast
with each other ever again?
Never.
We'll never be able to play
poker together ever again?
Never.
You'll never come
to my house
to watch football?
No, never.
( sniffling )
Not even when the Dallas
cheerleaders are on?
( sobbing )
I sorry, Alex,
we cannot be friends.
It's a question of honor.
Without honor, a man is nothing.
I'm sorry, but this
is how it must be.
There's nothing I can
do to change that?
Nothing.
Well, I guess
that's it, then.
Good-bye, Latka.
Good-bye.
( sighs )
Wait!
Maybe is one solution.
What?
You and I could globnik.
What?
Well, is custom in my country,
when two friends cannot agree,
they globnik.
Well, what does that mean?
It's hard to explain.
Here, look it up.
Globnik?
Globnik.
Glbonik.
Garfnog, giffort...
glab, globnik.
Here it is, globnik.
"From glob, to disappear.
"Intransitive verb.
To pretend or assume some event
or occurrence never took place."
You think that would do it?
I mean, just pretend
it never happened?
Pretend what never happened?
Beats me.
Me, too.
Well, back to work.
Yep, I'll, um...
I'll, I'll see you.
Okay, bye.
Okay, Latka, your deal.
Thank you
very much.
Latka love poker.
Abbee, abbee, abbee, abbee,
dabbee, dabbee, dabbee, dabbee,
eicky, eicky, eicky, eicky,
bicky, bicky, bicky, bicky,
eh... sappee, sappee,
sappee, sappee.
I'll take dabbee.
Okay, uh, abbee, dabbee.
BOBBY:
Give me dabbee.
Abbee, dabbee.
Eicky for me.
Abbee, dabbee, eicky.
And dealer take bicky.
Abbee, dabbee,
eicky, bicky.
Okay, I open one kripkee.
I'm in.
I see your kripkee
and I raise a kebel.
Okay, big shots, I see you
and raise ten kebels.
Hey, get this, Latka.
I bet he's drawing
to an inside rebelyek.
I'll see that.
Yeah, yeah, I'm in.
Call.
Okay. What you
got, Bobby?
Yeah, what do
you got, Bobby?
A pair of dorfnickis.
I just missed my royal pipik.
All right,
three yadabis.
Hold it!
A full flerm.
Full ferm?
( theme music playing )
WOMAN:
Good night, Mr. Walters.
( Walters grunts )