SpongeBob SquarePants (1999–…): Season 1, Episode 20 - Hooky/Mermaidman and Barnacleboy II - full transcript
Hooky: When the mysterious "hooks" (fishing, that is) suddenly appear in Bikini Bottom, Mr. Krabs warns SpongeBob to stay away from them. Despite Mr. Krabs' scary tales of sea creatures winding up in gift shops or packed cans, Patrick convinces SpongeBob that there's no risk and the boys tempt fate by riding the hooks and jumping off for fun. Mermaidman and Barnacleboy II: SpongeBob wins the big prize from his favorite TV show, "The Adventures of Mermaidman and Barnacleboy" - The Conch Signal! Now he can summon the semi-retired super heroes whenever there's an emergency. Rather than keep getting signals for "emergencies" like opening jars, the duo take SpongeBob along for their patrol to see what real crime fighting is all about.
ARE YOU READY, KIDS?
Kids:
AYE, AYE, CAPTAIN!
I CAN'T HEAR YOU.
( louder ):
AYE, AYE, CAPTAIN!
♪ OH... ♪
♪ WHO LIVES IN A PINEAPPLE
UNDER THE SEA? ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ ABSORBENT AND YELLOW
AND POROUS IS HE. ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ IF NAUTICAL NONSENSE BE
SOMETHING YOU WISH... ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ THEN DROP ON THE DECK
AND FLOP LIKE A FISH. ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ READY?
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
( laughs heartily )
[Captioning sponsored by THE
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
( plays airy tune )
and NICKELODEON]
Narrator
FISHERMEN HAVE QUITE AN EFFECT
ON OUR UNDERSEA FRIENDS.
Squidward:
SPONGEBOB, HAVE YOU FINISHED
SWABBING THE DECK?
ALMOST. THERE'S A NASTY BARNACLE
UNDER TABLE NINE.
THEY'RE BACK!
THEY'RE BACK, I TELL YOU!
I SAW THEM WITH ME OWN EYES!
( all muttering )
THE HOOKS! THE HOOKS!
HOW ABOUT A MINT?
Krabs:
THE HOOKS!
THE HOOKS!
CAN YOU MAKE THAT TO GO?
YOU DON'T KNOW
HOW LUCKY YOU ARE.
THE HOOKS!
SO THERE I WAS,
MINDING MY OWN BUSINESS...
I'D LOVE TO HEAR
ANOTHER OF YOUR
RIVETING SEA TALES,
BUT, UM...
I HAVE TO DO
MY WASTEBASKET
INSPECTIONS.
UH-HUH... MM-HMM... OH, YEAH,
THERE'S ONE.
FINE! DON'T SAY
I DIDN'T WARN YOU.
WARN HIM ABOUT WHAT, MR. KRABS?
THE HOOKS, ME BUCKO.
THEY'RE BACK.
BEWARE THE HOOKS.
THE HOOKS?
AYE, THE HOOKS.
THEY DANGLE DOWN
AND DRAW YOU CLOSE
WITH THEIR
PLEASING SHAPES
AND THEIR
BEGUILING COLORS.
AND JUST WHEN YOU THINK YOU
FOUND THE LAND OF MILK AND HONEY
THEY GRAB YOU BY THE BRITCHES
AND HAUL YOU WAY UP HIGH!
THEN HIGHER,
AND HIGHER,
AND HIGHER!
UNTIL YOU'RE HAULED
UP TO THE SURFACE
FLOPPING AND GASPING
FOR BREATH.
AND THEN THEY COOK YOU
AND THEN THEY EAT YOU!
OR WORSE...
WHAT COULD BE WORSE THAN THAT?!
GIFT SHOPS.
( gasps )
DON'T LET IT GET ME, MR. KRABS.
THERE, THERE, BOY,
THEY WON'T GET YOU.
NOT AS LONG AS YOU LISTEN
TO OLD MR. KRABS.
NOW GET BACK
TO THE KITCHEN!
AYE-AYE, MR. KRABS!
GOOD MORNING,
KRUSTY CREW!
HEY, PATRICK.
GUESS WHAT?
THE CARNIVAL'S IN TOWN.
COME ON, LET'S GO.
I CAN'T LEAVE NOW,
I'M WORKING.
IT'S NOT LEAVING.
YOU'RE JUST
TAKING A BREAK.
♪ WE'RE GOING TO THE CARNIVAL,
GOING TO THE CARNIV... OOF! ♪
♪ WE'RE GOING TO THE CARNIVAL,
GOING TO THE CARNIVAL. ♪
THERE IT IS, SPONGEBOB.
THE CARNIVAL IS
BACK IN TOWN!
I'M GOING TO BE FIRST IN LINE
FOR EVERYTHING!
WHERE IS
EVERYBODY?
I DON'T KNOW.
THERE WAS ONE KID
HERE EARLIER.
DOESN'T LOOK LIKE
ANY CARNIVAL I EVER...
( clink )
OH!
EXCUSE ME.
( gasps )
STOP, PATRICK!
DON'T TOUCH IT.
THIS ISN'T THE CARNIVAL.
THOSE ARE HOOKS!
MR. KRABS SAYS
THEY'RE REALLY DANGEROUS!
HMM...
I SENSE NO DANGER HERE.
HOW COULD THEY BE DANGEROUS?
THEY'RE COVERED
WITH FREE CHEESE!
ALL I KNOW IS, MR. KRABS SAID...
PATRICK!
DON'T DO THAT!
MMM...
CHEESY.
NO DANGER HERE.
GO ON, TRY IT.
BUT MR. KRABS SAID...
SPONGEBOB, LET ME
ASK YOU SOMETHING.
DOES THIS LOOK DANGEROUS?
( screams )
PATRICK! DON'T!
LIGHTEN UP, WILL YOU?
OR DO I HAVE TO EAT
ALL THIS CHEESE BY MYSEL...
WHOA, HO, HO...!
( gasps )
PATRICK!
HELP! OH, PATRICK! HELP!
OH, PATRICK, COME BACK!
OH, MY BEST FRIEND!
( laughing )
( crying )
( grunts )
PATRICK... YOU'RE ALIVE!
AM I EVER!
YOU SHOULD TRY IT.
BUT WHAT ABOUT THE SURFACE...
AND YOUR BRITCHES...
AND THE GIFT SHOPS?
YOU JUST JUMP OFF
BEFORE YOU GO UP
TOO HIGH.
MR. KRABS SAID I SHOULDN'T
GET NEAR THOSE THINGS.
DID HE SAY YOU
SHOULDN'T CLIMB
ON TOP OF THEM
AND RIDE THEM
LIKE A HORSY?
WELL, NO.
WHEE...
I GUESS HE DIDN'T!
( both laughing )
HI-HO, SILVERFISH!
AWAY!
( laughing )
( laughing )
READY?
READY.
Both:
GERONIMO!
( laughing and whooping )
THIS IS MORE FUN
THAN DOUBLE OVERTIME
AT THE KRUSTY KRAB!
Customer:
P.U.!
YOU CALL THIS FOOD?
MY SANDWICH TASTES
LIKE A FRIED BOOT.
MY SANDWICH IS
A FRIED BOOT!
HURRY IT UP,
WILL YOU!
WE'RE HUNGRY
OVER HERE,
LOOK AT US!
( customers muttering
angrily... )
THAT'S NOT HOW YOU'RE
SUPPOSED TO FLIP IT!
( all talking at once )
WHY DO YOU WANT TO
EAT THIS STUFF ANYWAY?
Krabs:
MR. SQUIDWARD!
WHAT THE HALIBUT'S
GOING ON IN HERE?
IT'S A FEEDING
FRENZY, SIR
AND SPONGEBOB'S NOT
BACK FROM HIS BREAK.
( laughing )
WHAT?
I THOUGHT YOU SAID
SPONGEBOB WAS
TAKING A BREAK.
NO ONE'S TAKEN A BREAK
AT THE KRUSTY KRAB
SINCE THE CHUM FAMINE
OF '59. ( laughs )
NOW, WHAT WERE YOU SAYING?
HE TOOK... A BREAK.
ALL RIGHT, SPONGEBOB LAZYPANTS,
I'LL FIND YOU.
THIS NOSE CAN SMELL LAZINESS
FOR UP TO 10,000 LEAGUES. AHA!
I'LL GIVE YOU A BREAK
YOU'LL NOT SOON FORGET.
BUT MR. KRABS,
I STILL NEED HELP...!
( sniffing )
THEY SHOULD BE RIGHT HERE.
( both laughing )
AGAIN?
AGAIN!
THE HOOKS! NO, NO, NO!
Both:
ONE, TWO, THREE...
WAIT, WAIT!
OOF!
BOYS!
I WASN'T QUICK ENOUGH.
THEY'RE GONE! ( sobs )
IF I COULD ONLY HOLD HIM
IN ME ARMS AGAIN, I, I'D...
( laughing )
I'D THROTTLE THEM!
WHAT DID I TELL YOU
ABOUT THOSE HOOKS, BOY?
I, UH, I...
I'LL TELL YOU
ABOUT THE HOOKS.
YOU RIDE THEM UP
AND UP AND UP...
THEN YOU GENTLY FLOAT
DOWN.
AND DO YOU KNOW
WHAT HAPPENS
WHEN YOU DON'T
FLOAT BACK DOWN?
GIFT SHOP?
WORSE! YOU END UP
VACUUM-PACKED...
IN A CAN OF TUNA!
WITH NOTHING
TO LOOK FORWARD TO
BUT THE SMELL OF MAYONNAISE!
( scream )
AAH!
Both:
WE'RE SORRY, MR. KRABS.
I WANT YOU BOYS
TO PROMISE ME
YOU'LL NEVER GO
ON THOSE HOOKS AGAIN.
Both:
WE PROMISE, MR. KRABS.
I NEED A SAILOR'S PROMISE!
REPEAT AFTER ME.
YO-HO, YO-HO,
NEAR THE HOOKS I'LL NEVER GO.
Both:
YO-HO, YO-HO
NEAR THE HOOKS
WE'LL NEVER GO.
AAH! MOTHER OF PEARL!
FIRE ON THE POOP DECK!
Both:
AAH! MOTHER OF PEARL!
FIRE ON THE POOP DECK!
WELL... WHEW!
ALL RIGHT, THEN.
LET'S GET OUT OF
THIS DEATHTRAP.
SpongeBob:
OKAY, GARY, TODAY IS A NEW DAY.
I'M READY TO PROVE MYSELF
LOYAL TO MR. KRABS.
( Gary meows )
I'M READY!
♪ I'M READY, I'M READY,
I'M READY, I'M READY ♪
♪ I'M READY, READY, READY,
I'M READY... ♪
HEY, SPONGEBOB!
YOU'RE GOING THE WRONG WAY!
( grunts )
I ALWAYS GO TO WORK THIS WAY.
YOU'RE NOT GOING
TO WORK TODAY.
WE'RE GOING TO
GO PLAY...
HOOKY!
BUT PATRICK,
WE PROMISED.
I HAD MY FINGERS CROSSED.
YOU DON'T HAVE FINGERS.
WELL, THAT MR. KRABS
IS JUST A BIG DUMMY.
WE PLAYED
ON THOSE HOOKS
ALL DAY LONG
AND NOTHING
HAPPENED TO US.
BUT MR. KRABS SAID...
LOOK, SPONGEBOB.
ARE YOU GOING TO
LISTEN TO A BIG DUMMY
OR ARE YOU GOING TO
LISTEN TO ME?
UM...
SEE YOU LATER,
SPONGEBOB.
I'M GOING TO GO HAVE SOME FUN.
WHOO-HOO!
COME ON, SPONGEBOB!
WHOO-HOO!
YOU KNOW
YOU WANT TO...
OH... I KNOW I WANT TO
BUT I PROMISED MR. KRABS
I WOULDN'T GO NEAR ANOTHER...
AAH, HOOK!
OH, NO. MR. KRABS
TOLD ME ALL ABOUT YOU.
YOU ARE A LIAR,
A DECEIVER!
I'LL NEVER FALL
FOR YOUR TRICKS AGAIN!
NEVER!
IS THIS SEAT TAKEN?
WHOO...
( laughing )
( giggling )
HOO, GLAD I GOT THAT
OUT OF MY SYSTEM.
( gasps )
I'M... HOOKED.
AND THAT MEANS...
( screams )
HELP! I'M HOOKED! HELP!
MR. KRABS, HELP!
IT HAPPENED! I'M HOOKED!
OH, NO, THE HOOK, THE HOOK!
GIFT SHOP! TUNA CAN!
MAYONNAISE!
Krabs:
HERE YOU GO, PEARL.
FREE WATER FOR ALL
YOUR LITTLE FRIENDS.
THANKS, DAD.
JUST DON'T FORGET TO LEAVE A TIP
FOR OLD MR. KRABS.
PSST! MR. KRABS...
SPONGEBOB!
YOU'RE TWO MINUTES LATE!
WHAT KEPT YOU, LADDIE?
UM, YOU KNOW THOSE HOOKS
WE WERE TALKING ABOUT YESTERDAY?
DIDN'T I TELL YOU
NOT TO GO NEAR THOSE HOOKS?
UM... NO.
ER...! I MEAN YES, YES,
YOU TOLD ME NOT TO GO NEAR THEM!
WELL, YOU WEREN'T PLAYING ON
THOSE HOOKS, WERE YOU, LADDIE?
OF COURSE NOT...
ER, I MEAN, NOT EXACTLY.
ER, I MEAN, YES! YES, I DID IT!
I ADMIT IT!
( crying )
OH, MR. KRABS,
I'M SO ASHAMED!
I MEAN, LOOK AT ME!
I'M HOOKED...!
HMM, IT'S IN THERE PRETTY DEEP.
WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?
THERE'S ONLY ONE THING
TO DO, BOY.
( all laughing )
OH, NO, MR. KRABS.
I CAN'T TAKE OFF MY PANTS.
NOT IN FRONT OF ALL THESE...
GIRLS.
( reeling )
( gasps )
OH, OKAY, I'M TAKING THEM OFF,
I'M TAKING THEM OFF.
( rips ) THERE.
UH, LAD.
( girls laughing )
( screams )
OH, NO, OH, NO.
NO, NO, NO, MR. KRABS,
I CAN'T DO IT!
ANYTHING BUT THAT.
I UNDERSTAND.
YOU WERE A GOOD LITTLE
FRY COOK, SPONGEBOB.
( gasps )
BUT WE'LL FIND ANOTHER.
HOPEFULLY, ONE THAT WILL
LISTEN TO OLD MR. KRABS.
OH, MR. KRABS,
I'LL LISTEN, I PROMISE!
WHOA, WHOA...!
PLEASE SAVE ME, MR. KRABS!
( crying )
I PROMISE I'LL BE GOOD!
HOO!
( grunts )
All:
OH, LOOK... ( giggling )
Pearl:
IT'S SPONGEBOB NUDIEPANTS.
( screams )
( all laughing )
WELL, THAT WAS
MORE OF SPONGEBOB
THAN I NEEDED TO SEE.
MR. SQUIDWARD,
THAT WAS SOME
FINE ANGLING.
DO YOU THINK THE LAD
HAS LEARNED HIS LESSON?
Squidward:
OH, I THINK HE'LL REMEMBER THIS
FOR A LONG TIME.
I KNOW I WILL.
THE PANTS!
THE UNDERWEAR!
( both laughing... )
Patrick:
HELLO? DOES SOMEBODY
HAVE A CAN OPENER?
Narrator:
AH... SATURDAY MORNING
IN BIKINI BOTTOM.
SPONGEBOB IS WATCHING HIS
FAVORITE SATURDAY MORNING SHOW
THE ADVENTURES OF MERMAIDMAN
AND BARNACLEBOY.
ENJOYING A BOWL OF MERMAIDMAN
AND BARNACLEBOY BRAN CEREAL.
AND WEARING THE OFFICIAL
MERMAIDMAN AND BARNACLEBOY
BREAKFAST BITERS.
( show theme playing )
MermaidMan,
fleet and forceful...
BY THE POWER OF NEPTUNE!
AIDED BY HIS YOUNG WARD...
AIDED BY HIS YOUNG WARD...
( grunts )
PROTECTING THE SEA
WITH FEATS OF STRENGTH
AND AGILITY...
( both grunting )
( crack )
TO THE CHIROPRACTOR!
AWAY...!
FIGHTING A ROGUES GALLERY
OF VILLAINS
LIKE THE SINISTER SLUG...
THE ATOMIC FLOUNDER...
AND THE DREADED JUMBO SHRIMP!
MERMAIDMAN AND BARNACLEBOY
UNITE!
HEY, KIDS, ARE YOU READY
TO HEAR THE WINNER OF
THIS WEEK'S CONTEST?
I'M READY! I'M READY!
OUR WINNER WILL RECEIVE A
SPECIAL SECRET COLLECTOR'S ITEM
FROM THE ADVENTURES OF
MERMAIDMAN AND BARNACLEBOY!
AND THE WINNER IS...
( chattering )
SPRINGBOOB SQUIREPIN...
AW... I WORKED FOREVER
ON THOSE LIFE-SIZE
CRABBY PATTY MANNEQUINS OF
MERMAIDMAN AND BARNACLEBOY.
...FOR THESE LIFE-SIZE
CRABBY PATTY MANNEQUINS
OF MERMAIDMAN AND BARNACLEBOY!
HEY! SPRINGBOOB SQUIREPIN
STOLE MY IDEA!
( talking rapidly )
WHAT'S THAT?
OH... IT APPEARS I'VE MADE
A SLIGHT ERROR IN PRONUNCIATION.
THE REAL NAME
OF THE WINNER IS...
SpongeBob SquarePants!
SpongeBob:
WA-HOO!
OH, I WONDER WHEN MY PRIZE
WILL... GET HERE...
MY PRIZE!
( crying, blowing nose )
( laughing )
( gasps )
CAN IT BE?
IT IS!
THE CONCH SIGNAL!
FROM THE ADVENTURES OF
MERMAIDMAN AND BARNACLEBOY.
AS SEEN ON TV!
I WONDER IF IT STILL WORKS?
( inhales deeply )
( blows weak sour note )
( note echoing... )
THE CONCH SIGNAL!
TO THE INVISIBLE
BOATMOBILE!
( grunting and groaning... )
UH, MERMAIDMAN?
YES, BARNACLEBOY?
WE'RE NOT IN THE INVISIBLE
BOATMOBILE, ARE WE?
UH, NOPE.
( both grunt )
I TOLD YOU MAKING
THE BOATMOBILE INVISIBLE
WAS A STUPID IDEA.
COME OUT, COME OUT,
WHEREVER YOU ARE.
IT'S GOT TO BE HERE SOMEWHERE...
OHH!
OH, MERMAIDMAN, I THINK I...
MermaidMan:
FOUND IT!
COME ON,
GET A MOVE ON, SON.
WE DON'T HAVE ALL DAY.
IGNITION...
ON!
ROCKET ON!
( engine roaring... )
HMM...
MAYBE THE CONCH SIGNAL
DOESN'T WORK ANYMORE.
( meows )
( engine roaring,
tires squealing,
cat screeching )
MermaidMan:
TORPEDO MODE!
FIRE!
MERMAIDMAN!
( dazed ):
AND BOBICLE BOB...
I CAN'T BELIEVE IT,
GARY.
MERMAIDMAN
AND BARNACLEBOY
IN OUR HOME!
( meows )
EXCUSE ME, I'M...
OH, MY NEPTUNE!
HE'S BEEN
HORRIBLY DISFIGURED!
OH, BLAST US!
WE'RE TOO LATE!
OH, PLEASE.
HE'S NOT DISFIGURED
HE'S, HE'S, JUST
THAT SPONGE KID AGAIN.
OH, YEAH.
GOOD TO SEE YOU, LAD!
SAY, BARNACLEBOY,
WE'VE GOT TO FIND OUT
WHERE THAT CONCH SIGNAL
CAME FROM.
OH, I BLEW
THE CONCH SIGNAL, SIR.
ALL RIGHT,
WHERE'S THE DANGER, SON?
BRING IT ON.
BRING IT ON!
THERE'S NO DANGER.
Both:
NO DANGER?!
LOOK, THERE
HAS TO BE DANGER.
YOU BLEW
THE CONCH SIGNAL,
AND WHEN YOU BLOW...
WHERE DID YOU GET
THAT THING ANYWAY?
I WON IT IN A CONTEST.
Both:
CONTEST?
THEY DON'T TELL US
ANYTHING ANYMORE!
LOOK, SPONGY, THAT AIN'T NO TOY.
THAT'S RIGHT--
THE CONCH SIGNAL
IS AN AWESOME
RESPONSIBILITY.
WE'RE DUTY-BOUND
TO HELP WHENEVER
IT SOUNDS.
BUT YOU ONLY BLOW IT
WHEN THERE'S TROUBLE
OR THERE WILL BE TROUBLE,
YOU GOT THAT?
YES, SIRS!
GOOD BOY!
( click tongues )
COME ON, COME ON,
COME ON.
THEY'RE SERVING
MEAT LOAF TODAY.
OH, GOODY!
DON'T WORRY, MERMAIDMAN.
YOU WON'T BE HEARING FROM ME
FOR JUST ANYTHING.
ONLY FOR THE BIG EMERGENCIES!
WILL YOU HURRY UP IN THERE?
AND SAVE ME SOME HOT WA...
( conch signal blowing )
THE CONCH SIGNAL!
COME, YOUNG WARD!
( groans )
( grunting and groaning )
( tires squeal,
cat screeches )
OH... YOUTH!
CUT DOWN IN ITS PRIME!
( groaning )
OH, SPEAK TO ME, SON.
HELP... CAN'T...
OPEN MAYONNAISE.
WHAT?! I COME DOWN HERE
IN MY UNDERWEAR TO OPEN
A JAR OF MAYONNAISE?!
BUT...
BUT NOTHING! WE CAN'T
GO AROUND SOCIALIZING.
WE HAVE TO BE PREPARED
FOR, UH... EMERGENCIES!
BARNACLEBOY,
THINK ABOUT IT.
EMERGENCIES DON'T COME AROUND
AS OFTEN AS THEY USED TO.
ALL RIGHT, OKAY.
YOU CAN BLOW THE CONCH
EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE
JUST GIVE US SOMETHING TO DO
WHEN WE SHOW UP!
YAY!
YAY!
( conch signal blowing )
DANGER!
( no dialogue )
ALL RIGHT, THAT'S IT!
GIVE ME THAT!
YOU'RE RUNNING US
RAGGED.
MUST... MUST ANSWER
THE CLARION CALL!
( groans )
WE'RE EXHAUSTED!
I'M SORRY, BARNACLEBOY.
I DIDN'T MEAN IT, I...
JUST WANTED TO SPEND TIME
WITH YOU.
( crying ):
YOU'RE MY HEROES!
IT'S TOO LATE FOR THAT,
MR. CONTEST WINNER.
I'M GOING TO DESTROY THIS THING
WITH MY... SULFUR VISION!
( grunting )
( groans )
( grunting )
( groans )
WELL, I'LL DESTROY IT
WHEN I GET BACK TO
THE, UH, MERMALAIR.
AND AS FOR YOU...
BARNACLEBOY...
DON'T SQUASH HIS ENTHUSIASM.
AFTER ALL, HE COULD BE
THE HERO OF TOMORROW.
OR THE VILLAIN.
BESIDES...
I REMEMBER ANOTHER
YOUNG WHIPPERSNAPPER
WHO WANTED TO BE A SUPER-HERO.
( chuckles )
YOU DON'T EVEN REMEMBER
BREAKFAST, YOU OLD COOT.
( crying )
MAYBE THE CONCH SIGNAL
IS TOO MUCH RESPONSIBILITY.
BUT HOW WOULD YOU LIKE
TO SPEND THE REST OF THE
AFTERNOON... ON PATROL?
WHAT?!
TO THE INVISIBLE
BOATMOBILE!
SpongeBob:
♪ OH... ♪
SpongeBob and MermaidMan:
♪ JINGLE BELLS ♪
♪ MERMAIDMAN SMELLS,
BARNACLEBOY LAID AN EGG ♪
♪ THE INVISIBLE BOATMOBILE
LOST A WHEEL AND... ♪
HEY, CAN I DRIVE?
DRIVE?
WHAT DO YOU KNOW
ABOUT DRIVING
THE INVISIBLE BOATMOBILE?
TONS! LIKE THE WINDSHIELD WIPERS
ARE RIGHT HERE.
DON'T TOUCH THAT BUTTON!
IT'S THE...
( grunting and groaning )
...ORIGAMI BUTTON.
MermaidMan:
WHEN YOU'RE PATROLLING THE CITY,
YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO BE VIGILANT.
ON YOUR TOES,
CONSTANTLY ALERT.
ALWAYS EXPECT
THE UNEXPECTED.
( both gasp )
( screaming... )
I'VE GOT THE DONUTS!
SpongeBob and MermaidMan:
♪ ...AND BARNACLEBOY
LAID AN EGG, HEY, HEY! ♪
OH, THAT FELLOW
OVER THERE
USED TO BE
THE ATOMIC FLOUNDER.
I KNOW HE DOESN'T
LOOK LIKE MUCH
BUT HE COULD
GO BACK TO CRIME...
( snaps fingers )
...JUST LIKE THAT.
( both laugh )
Flounder:
HELP! HELP!
HELP, SOMEBODY THERE!
YOU'RE UNDER ARREST,
ATOMIC FLOUNDER!
STOP, KID, STOP!
LET HIM GO!
YOU SAID HE COULD SNAP...
JUST LIKE THAT.
WHAT?!
GET OFF OF ME!
IF I WEREN'T RETIRED,
I, I'D...
( roaring )
DO THAT.
OUT OF MY WAY, PUNK!
SpongeBob:
I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!
I RODE IN
THE INVISIBLE BOATMOBILE
MET A VILLAIN AND LEARNED
TO TREAT THIRD-DEGREE BURNS,
ALL IN ONE DAY.
WHAT ARE WE DOING TOMORROW?
UH... SAY, KID,
WHY DON'T YOU
TAKE THIS NICKEL
AND GO OVER THERE
AND SEE IF OUR THEME SONG
IS ON THE JUKEBOX?
OKAY.
YOU KNOW, FOR
A PAIN IN THE NECK
HE'S A PRETTY NICE KID.
LET'S DITCH HIM.
RIGHT BEHIND YOU.
IT DOESN'T SEEM TO BE HERE.
OH, IT'S THERE,
ALL RIGHT.
KEEP LOOKING.
DILIGENCE,
DILIGENCE.
AYE-AYE, SIR!
( both chuckling )
DAGNABBIT!
WHAT'S THE MATTER?
WHERE DID WE PARK
THE INVISIBLE BOATMOBILE?
AW, THAT'S THE 15th TIME
I'VE LOOKED.
( in dramatic voice ):
BUT I CAN'T LET MY HEROES DOWN!
BOATMOBILE? WHERE ARE YOU?
BARNACLEBOY, I FOUND IT!
( starts engine )
( sizzling )
( menacing laughter )
STILL GETTING BURNED
ON THAT TAILPIPE,
HUH, BARNACLEBOY?
( laughing )
IT'S THE DIRTY BUBBLE!
IN ALL HIS DIRTY
ROUNDNESS!
Both:
OH, NO!
I FOUND IT!
AND IT'S THE SPECIAL DANCE MIX.
MermaidMan and BarnacleBoy:
HELP! HELP!
( Dirty Bubble laughing )
HELP! HELP!
HOLY CRABBY PATTIES!
MERMAIDMAN AND BARNACLEBOY'S
ARCHNEMESIS!
THE DIRTY BUBBLE!
I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!
( laughing )
YOU CANNOT SAVE THEM,
SPONGE OF MYSTERY!
THEY ARE TRAPPED BY MY AWESOME
SURFACE TENSION! ( laughs )
YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!
YOU'RE MY MOST FAVORITE
SUPERVILLAIN!
CAN I HAVE YOUR AUTOGRAPH?
OH, NO, YOU FOOL!
STAY BACK! THE POINT!
OOH, OOH, OOH!
WATCH THE POINT! AAH!
( MermaidMan laughs )
YOU SAVED US, SON!
YEAH, YOU'RE,
YOU'RE A HERO!
I AM?
ARE YOU UP
FOR ANOTHER RIDE
IN THE INVISIBLE
BOATMOBILE?
♪ OH... ♪
♪ JINGLE BELLS,
MERMAIDMAN SMELLS ♪
♪ BARNACLEBOY LAID AN EGG ♪
♪ THE DIRTY BUBBLE POPPED
AND MERMAIDMAN AND BARNACLEBOY
AND SPONGEBOB GOT AWAY! YAY! ♪
BarnacleBoy:
WATCH OUT.
[Captioning sponsored by THE
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
and NICKELODEON]
Captioned by The Caption Center
WGBH Educational Foundation]
Kids:
AYE, AYE, CAPTAIN!
I CAN'T HEAR YOU.
( louder ):
AYE, AYE, CAPTAIN!
♪ OH... ♪
♪ WHO LIVES IN A PINEAPPLE
UNDER THE SEA? ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ ABSORBENT AND YELLOW
AND POROUS IS HE. ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ IF NAUTICAL NONSENSE BE
SOMETHING YOU WISH... ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ THEN DROP ON THE DECK
AND FLOP LIKE A FISH. ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ READY?
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
( laughs heartily )
[Captioning sponsored by THE
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
( plays airy tune )
and NICKELODEON]
Narrator
FISHERMEN HAVE QUITE AN EFFECT
ON OUR UNDERSEA FRIENDS.
Squidward:
SPONGEBOB, HAVE YOU FINISHED
SWABBING THE DECK?
ALMOST. THERE'S A NASTY BARNACLE
UNDER TABLE NINE.
THEY'RE BACK!
THEY'RE BACK, I TELL YOU!
I SAW THEM WITH ME OWN EYES!
( all muttering )
THE HOOKS! THE HOOKS!
HOW ABOUT A MINT?
Krabs:
THE HOOKS!
THE HOOKS!
CAN YOU MAKE THAT TO GO?
YOU DON'T KNOW
HOW LUCKY YOU ARE.
THE HOOKS!
SO THERE I WAS,
MINDING MY OWN BUSINESS...
I'D LOVE TO HEAR
ANOTHER OF YOUR
RIVETING SEA TALES,
BUT, UM...
I HAVE TO DO
MY WASTEBASKET
INSPECTIONS.
UH-HUH... MM-HMM... OH, YEAH,
THERE'S ONE.
FINE! DON'T SAY
I DIDN'T WARN YOU.
WARN HIM ABOUT WHAT, MR. KRABS?
THE HOOKS, ME BUCKO.
THEY'RE BACK.
BEWARE THE HOOKS.
THE HOOKS?
AYE, THE HOOKS.
THEY DANGLE DOWN
AND DRAW YOU CLOSE
WITH THEIR
PLEASING SHAPES
AND THEIR
BEGUILING COLORS.
AND JUST WHEN YOU THINK YOU
FOUND THE LAND OF MILK AND HONEY
THEY GRAB YOU BY THE BRITCHES
AND HAUL YOU WAY UP HIGH!
THEN HIGHER,
AND HIGHER,
AND HIGHER!
UNTIL YOU'RE HAULED
UP TO THE SURFACE
FLOPPING AND GASPING
FOR BREATH.
AND THEN THEY COOK YOU
AND THEN THEY EAT YOU!
OR WORSE...
WHAT COULD BE WORSE THAN THAT?!
GIFT SHOPS.
( gasps )
DON'T LET IT GET ME, MR. KRABS.
THERE, THERE, BOY,
THEY WON'T GET YOU.
NOT AS LONG AS YOU LISTEN
TO OLD MR. KRABS.
NOW GET BACK
TO THE KITCHEN!
AYE-AYE, MR. KRABS!
GOOD MORNING,
KRUSTY CREW!
HEY, PATRICK.
GUESS WHAT?
THE CARNIVAL'S IN TOWN.
COME ON, LET'S GO.
I CAN'T LEAVE NOW,
I'M WORKING.
IT'S NOT LEAVING.
YOU'RE JUST
TAKING A BREAK.
♪ WE'RE GOING TO THE CARNIVAL,
GOING TO THE CARNIV... OOF! ♪
♪ WE'RE GOING TO THE CARNIVAL,
GOING TO THE CARNIVAL. ♪
THERE IT IS, SPONGEBOB.
THE CARNIVAL IS
BACK IN TOWN!
I'M GOING TO BE FIRST IN LINE
FOR EVERYTHING!
WHERE IS
EVERYBODY?
I DON'T KNOW.
THERE WAS ONE KID
HERE EARLIER.
DOESN'T LOOK LIKE
ANY CARNIVAL I EVER...
( clink )
OH!
EXCUSE ME.
( gasps )
STOP, PATRICK!
DON'T TOUCH IT.
THIS ISN'T THE CARNIVAL.
THOSE ARE HOOKS!
MR. KRABS SAYS
THEY'RE REALLY DANGEROUS!
HMM...
I SENSE NO DANGER HERE.
HOW COULD THEY BE DANGEROUS?
THEY'RE COVERED
WITH FREE CHEESE!
ALL I KNOW IS, MR. KRABS SAID...
PATRICK!
DON'T DO THAT!
MMM...
CHEESY.
NO DANGER HERE.
GO ON, TRY IT.
BUT MR. KRABS SAID...
SPONGEBOB, LET ME
ASK YOU SOMETHING.
DOES THIS LOOK DANGEROUS?
( screams )
PATRICK! DON'T!
LIGHTEN UP, WILL YOU?
OR DO I HAVE TO EAT
ALL THIS CHEESE BY MYSEL...
WHOA, HO, HO...!
( gasps )
PATRICK!
HELP! OH, PATRICK! HELP!
OH, PATRICK, COME BACK!
OH, MY BEST FRIEND!
( laughing )
( crying )
( grunts )
PATRICK... YOU'RE ALIVE!
AM I EVER!
YOU SHOULD TRY IT.
BUT WHAT ABOUT THE SURFACE...
AND YOUR BRITCHES...
AND THE GIFT SHOPS?
YOU JUST JUMP OFF
BEFORE YOU GO UP
TOO HIGH.
MR. KRABS SAID I SHOULDN'T
GET NEAR THOSE THINGS.
DID HE SAY YOU
SHOULDN'T CLIMB
ON TOP OF THEM
AND RIDE THEM
LIKE A HORSY?
WELL, NO.
WHEE...
I GUESS HE DIDN'T!
( both laughing )
HI-HO, SILVERFISH!
AWAY!
( laughing )
( laughing )
READY?
READY.
Both:
GERONIMO!
( laughing and whooping )
THIS IS MORE FUN
THAN DOUBLE OVERTIME
AT THE KRUSTY KRAB!
Customer:
P.U.!
YOU CALL THIS FOOD?
MY SANDWICH TASTES
LIKE A FRIED BOOT.
MY SANDWICH IS
A FRIED BOOT!
HURRY IT UP,
WILL YOU!
WE'RE HUNGRY
OVER HERE,
LOOK AT US!
( customers muttering
angrily... )
THAT'S NOT HOW YOU'RE
SUPPOSED TO FLIP IT!
( all talking at once )
WHY DO YOU WANT TO
EAT THIS STUFF ANYWAY?
Krabs:
MR. SQUIDWARD!
WHAT THE HALIBUT'S
GOING ON IN HERE?
IT'S A FEEDING
FRENZY, SIR
AND SPONGEBOB'S NOT
BACK FROM HIS BREAK.
( laughing )
WHAT?
I THOUGHT YOU SAID
SPONGEBOB WAS
TAKING A BREAK.
NO ONE'S TAKEN A BREAK
AT THE KRUSTY KRAB
SINCE THE CHUM FAMINE
OF '59. ( laughs )
NOW, WHAT WERE YOU SAYING?
HE TOOK... A BREAK.
ALL RIGHT, SPONGEBOB LAZYPANTS,
I'LL FIND YOU.
THIS NOSE CAN SMELL LAZINESS
FOR UP TO 10,000 LEAGUES. AHA!
I'LL GIVE YOU A BREAK
YOU'LL NOT SOON FORGET.
BUT MR. KRABS,
I STILL NEED HELP...!
( sniffing )
THEY SHOULD BE RIGHT HERE.
( both laughing )
AGAIN?
AGAIN!
THE HOOKS! NO, NO, NO!
Both:
ONE, TWO, THREE...
WAIT, WAIT!
OOF!
BOYS!
I WASN'T QUICK ENOUGH.
THEY'RE GONE! ( sobs )
IF I COULD ONLY HOLD HIM
IN ME ARMS AGAIN, I, I'D...
( laughing )
I'D THROTTLE THEM!
WHAT DID I TELL YOU
ABOUT THOSE HOOKS, BOY?
I, UH, I...
I'LL TELL YOU
ABOUT THE HOOKS.
YOU RIDE THEM UP
AND UP AND UP...
THEN YOU GENTLY FLOAT
DOWN.
AND DO YOU KNOW
WHAT HAPPENS
WHEN YOU DON'T
FLOAT BACK DOWN?
GIFT SHOP?
WORSE! YOU END UP
VACUUM-PACKED...
IN A CAN OF TUNA!
WITH NOTHING
TO LOOK FORWARD TO
BUT THE SMELL OF MAYONNAISE!
( scream )
AAH!
Both:
WE'RE SORRY, MR. KRABS.
I WANT YOU BOYS
TO PROMISE ME
YOU'LL NEVER GO
ON THOSE HOOKS AGAIN.
Both:
WE PROMISE, MR. KRABS.
I NEED A SAILOR'S PROMISE!
REPEAT AFTER ME.
YO-HO, YO-HO,
NEAR THE HOOKS I'LL NEVER GO.
Both:
YO-HO, YO-HO
NEAR THE HOOKS
WE'LL NEVER GO.
AAH! MOTHER OF PEARL!
FIRE ON THE POOP DECK!
Both:
AAH! MOTHER OF PEARL!
FIRE ON THE POOP DECK!
WELL... WHEW!
ALL RIGHT, THEN.
LET'S GET OUT OF
THIS DEATHTRAP.
SpongeBob:
OKAY, GARY, TODAY IS A NEW DAY.
I'M READY TO PROVE MYSELF
LOYAL TO MR. KRABS.
( Gary meows )
I'M READY!
♪ I'M READY, I'M READY,
I'M READY, I'M READY ♪
♪ I'M READY, READY, READY,
I'M READY... ♪
HEY, SPONGEBOB!
YOU'RE GOING THE WRONG WAY!
( grunts )
I ALWAYS GO TO WORK THIS WAY.
YOU'RE NOT GOING
TO WORK TODAY.
WE'RE GOING TO
GO PLAY...
HOOKY!
BUT PATRICK,
WE PROMISED.
I HAD MY FINGERS CROSSED.
YOU DON'T HAVE FINGERS.
WELL, THAT MR. KRABS
IS JUST A BIG DUMMY.
WE PLAYED
ON THOSE HOOKS
ALL DAY LONG
AND NOTHING
HAPPENED TO US.
BUT MR. KRABS SAID...
LOOK, SPONGEBOB.
ARE YOU GOING TO
LISTEN TO A BIG DUMMY
OR ARE YOU GOING TO
LISTEN TO ME?
UM...
SEE YOU LATER,
SPONGEBOB.
I'M GOING TO GO HAVE SOME FUN.
WHOO-HOO!
COME ON, SPONGEBOB!
WHOO-HOO!
YOU KNOW
YOU WANT TO...
OH... I KNOW I WANT TO
BUT I PROMISED MR. KRABS
I WOULDN'T GO NEAR ANOTHER...
AAH, HOOK!
OH, NO. MR. KRABS
TOLD ME ALL ABOUT YOU.
YOU ARE A LIAR,
A DECEIVER!
I'LL NEVER FALL
FOR YOUR TRICKS AGAIN!
NEVER!
IS THIS SEAT TAKEN?
WHOO...
( laughing )
( giggling )
HOO, GLAD I GOT THAT
OUT OF MY SYSTEM.
( gasps )
I'M... HOOKED.
AND THAT MEANS...
( screams )
HELP! I'M HOOKED! HELP!
MR. KRABS, HELP!
IT HAPPENED! I'M HOOKED!
OH, NO, THE HOOK, THE HOOK!
GIFT SHOP! TUNA CAN!
MAYONNAISE!
Krabs:
HERE YOU GO, PEARL.
FREE WATER FOR ALL
YOUR LITTLE FRIENDS.
THANKS, DAD.
JUST DON'T FORGET TO LEAVE A TIP
FOR OLD MR. KRABS.
PSST! MR. KRABS...
SPONGEBOB!
YOU'RE TWO MINUTES LATE!
WHAT KEPT YOU, LADDIE?
UM, YOU KNOW THOSE HOOKS
WE WERE TALKING ABOUT YESTERDAY?
DIDN'T I TELL YOU
NOT TO GO NEAR THOSE HOOKS?
UM... NO.
ER...! I MEAN YES, YES,
YOU TOLD ME NOT TO GO NEAR THEM!
WELL, YOU WEREN'T PLAYING ON
THOSE HOOKS, WERE YOU, LADDIE?
OF COURSE NOT...
ER, I MEAN, NOT EXACTLY.
ER, I MEAN, YES! YES, I DID IT!
I ADMIT IT!
( crying )
OH, MR. KRABS,
I'M SO ASHAMED!
I MEAN, LOOK AT ME!
I'M HOOKED...!
HMM, IT'S IN THERE PRETTY DEEP.
WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?
THERE'S ONLY ONE THING
TO DO, BOY.
( all laughing )
OH, NO, MR. KRABS.
I CAN'T TAKE OFF MY PANTS.
NOT IN FRONT OF ALL THESE...
GIRLS.
( reeling )
( gasps )
OH, OKAY, I'M TAKING THEM OFF,
I'M TAKING THEM OFF.
( rips ) THERE.
UH, LAD.
( girls laughing )
( screams )
OH, NO, OH, NO.
NO, NO, NO, MR. KRABS,
I CAN'T DO IT!
ANYTHING BUT THAT.
I UNDERSTAND.
YOU WERE A GOOD LITTLE
FRY COOK, SPONGEBOB.
( gasps )
BUT WE'LL FIND ANOTHER.
HOPEFULLY, ONE THAT WILL
LISTEN TO OLD MR. KRABS.
OH, MR. KRABS,
I'LL LISTEN, I PROMISE!
WHOA, WHOA...!
PLEASE SAVE ME, MR. KRABS!
( crying )
I PROMISE I'LL BE GOOD!
HOO!
( grunts )
All:
OH, LOOK... ( giggling )
Pearl:
IT'S SPONGEBOB NUDIEPANTS.
( screams )
( all laughing )
WELL, THAT WAS
MORE OF SPONGEBOB
THAN I NEEDED TO SEE.
MR. SQUIDWARD,
THAT WAS SOME
FINE ANGLING.
DO YOU THINK THE LAD
HAS LEARNED HIS LESSON?
Squidward:
OH, I THINK HE'LL REMEMBER THIS
FOR A LONG TIME.
I KNOW I WILL.
THE PANTS!
THE UNDERWEAR!
( both laughing... )
Patrick:
HELLO? DOES SOMEBODY
HAVE A CAN OPENER?
Narrator:
AH... SATURDAY MORNING
IN BIKINI BOTTOM.
SPONGEBOB IS WATCHING HIS
FAVORITE SATURDAY MORNING SHOW
THE ADVENTURES OF MERMAIDMAN
AND BARNACLEBOY.
ENJOYING A BOWL OF MERMAIDMAN
AND BARNACLEBOY BRAN CEREAL.
AND WEARING THE OFFICIAL
MERMAIDMAN AND BARNACLEBOY
BREAKFAST BITERS.
( show theme playing )
MermaidMan,
fleet and forceful...
BY THE POWER OF NEPTUNE!
AIDED BY HIS YOUNG WARD...
AIDED BY HIS YOUNG WARD...
( grunts )
PROTECTING THE SEA
WITH FEATS OF STRENGTH
AND AGILITY...
( both grunting )
( crack )
TO THE CHIROPRACTOR!
AWAY...!
FIGHTING A ROGUES GALLERY
OF VILLAINS
LIKE THE SINISTER SLUG...
THE ATOMIC FLOUNDER...
AND THE DREADED JUMBO SHRIMP!
MERMAIDMAN AND BARNACLEBOY
UNITE!
HEY, KIDS, ARE YOU READY
TO HEAR THE WINNER OF
THIS WEEK'S CONTEST?
I'M READY! I'M READY!
OUR WINNER WILL RECEIVE A
SPECIAL SECRET COLLECTOR'S ITEM
FROM THE ADVENTURES OF
MERMAIDMAN AND BARNACLEBOY!
AND THE WINNER IS...
( chattering )
SPRINGBOOB SQUIREPIN...
AW... I WORKED FOREVER
ON THOSE LIFE-SIZE
CRABBY PATTY MANNEQUINS OF
MERMAIDMAN AND BARNACLEBOY.
...FOR THESE LIFE-SIZE
CRABBY PATTY MANNEQUINS
OF MERMAIDMAN AND BARNACLEBOY!
HEY! SPRINGBOOB SQUIREPIN
STOLE MY IDEA!
( talking rapidly )
WHAT'S THAT?
OH... IT APPEARS I'VE MADE
A SLIGHT ERROR IN PRONUNCIATION.
THE REAL NAME
OF THE WINNER IS...
SpongeBob SquarePants!
SpongeBob:
WA-HOO!
OH, I WONDER WHEN MY PRIZE
WILL... GET HERE...
MY PRIZE!
( crying, blowing nose )
( laughing )
( gasps )
CAN IT BE?
IT IS!
THE CONCH SIGNAL!
FROM THE ADVENTURES OF
MERMAIDMAN AND BARNACLEBOY.
AS SEEN ON TV!
I WONDER IF IT STILL WORKS?
( inhales deeply )
( blows weak sour note )
( note echoing... )
THE CONCH SIGNAL!
TO THE INVISIBLE
BOATMOBILE!
( grunting and groaning... )
UH, MERMAIDMAN?
YES, BARNACLEBOY?
WE'RE NOT IN THE INVISIBLE
BOATMOBILE, ARE WE?
UH, NOPE.
( both grunt )
I TOLD YOU MAKING
THE BOATMOBILE INVISIBLE
WAS A STUPID IDEA.
COME OUT, COME OUT,
WHEREVER YOU ARE.
IT'S GOT TO BE HERE SOMEWHERE...
OHH!
OH, MERMAIDMAN, I THINK I...
MermaidMan:
FOUND IT!
COME ON,
GET A MOVE ON, SON.
WE DON'T HAVE ALL DAY.
IGNITION...
ON!
ROCKET ON!
( engine roaring... )
HMM...
MAYBE THE CONCH SIGNAL
DOESN'T WORK ANYMORE.
( meows )
( engine roaring,
tires squealing,
cat screeching )
MermaidMan:
TORPEDO MODE!
FIRE!
MERMAIDMAN!
( dazed ):
AND BOBICLE BOB...
I CAN'T BELIEVE IT,
GARY.
MERMAIDMAN
AND BARNACLEBOY
IN OUR HOME!
( meows )
EXCUSE ME, I'M...
OH, MY NEPTUNE!
HE'S BEEN
HORRIBLY DISFIGURED!
OH, BLAST US!
WE'RE TOO LATE!
OH, PLEASE.
HE'S NOT DISFIGURED
HE'S, HE'S, JUST
THAT SPONGE KID AGAIN.
OH, YEAH.
GOOD TO SEE YOU, LAD!
SAY, BARNACLEBOY,
WE'VE GOT TO FIND OUT
WHERE THAT CONCH SIGNAL
CAME FROM.
OH, I BLEW
THE CONCH SIGNAL, SIR.
ALL RIGHT,
WHERE'S THE DANGER, SON?
BRING IT ON.
BRING IT ON!
THERE'S NO DANGER.
Both:
NO DANGER?!
LOOK, THERE
HAS TO BE DANGER.
YOU BLEW
THE CONCH SIGNAL,
AND WHEN YOU BLOW...
WHERE DID YOU GET
THAT THING ANYWAY?
I WON IT IN A CONTEST.
Both:
CONTEST?
THEY DON'T TELL US
ANYTHING ANYMORE!
LOOK, SPONGY, THAT AIN'T NO TOY.
THAT'S RIGHT--
THE CONCH SIGNAL
IS AN AWESOME
RESPONSIBILITY.
WE'RE DUTY-BOUND
TO HELP WHENEVER
IT SOUNDS.
BUT YOU ONLY BLOW IT
WHEN THERE'S TROUBLE
OR THERE WILL BE TROUBLE,
YOU GOT THAT?
YES, SIRS!
GOOD BOY!
( click tongues )
COME ON, COME ON,
COME ON.
THEY'RE SERVING
MEAT LOAF TODAY.
OH, GOODY!
DON'T WORRY, MERMAIDMAN.
YOU WON'T BE HEARING FROM ME
FOR JUST ANYTHING.
ONLY FOR THE BIG EMERGENCIES!
WILL YOU HURRY UP IN THERE?
AND SAVE ME SOME HOT WA...
( conch signal blowing )
THE CONCH SIGNAL!
COME, YOUNG WARD!
( groans )
( grunting and groaning )
( tires squeal,
cat screeches )
OH... YOUTH!
CUT DOWN IN ITS PRIME!
( groaning )
OH, SPEAK TO ME, SON.
HELP... CAN'T...
OPEN MAYONNAISE.
WHAT?! I COME DOWN HERE
IN MY UNDERWEAR TO OPEN
A JAR OF MAYONNAISE?!
BUT...
BUT NOTHING! WE CAN'T
GO AROUND SOCIALIZING.
WE HAVE TO BE PREPARED
FOR, UH... EMERGENCIES!
BARNACLEBOY,
THINK ABOUT IT.
EMERGENCIES DON'T COME AROUND
AS OFTEN AS THEY USED TO.
ALL RIGHT, OKAY.
YOU CAN BLOW THE CONCH
EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE
JUST GIVE US SOMETHING TO DO
WHEN WE SHOW UP!
YAY!
YAY!
( conch signal blowing )
DANGER!
( no dialogue )
ALL RIGHT, THAT'S IT!
GIVE ME THAT!
YOU'RE RUNNING US
RAGGED.
MUST... MUST ANSWER
THE CLARION CALL!
( groans )
WE'RE EXHAUSTED!
I'M SORRY, BARNACLEBOY.
I DIDN'T MEAN IT, I...
JUST WANTED TO SPEND TIME
WITH YOU.
( crying ):
YOU'RE MY HEROES!
IT'S TOO LATE FOR THAT,
MR. CONTEST WINNER.
I'M GOING TO DESTROY THIS THING
WITH MY... SULFUR VISION!
( grunting )
( groans )
( grunting )
( groans )
WELL, I'LL DESTROY IT
WHEN I GET BACK TO
THE, UH, MERMALAIR.
AND AS FOR YOU...
BARNACLEBOY...
DON'T SQUASH HIS ENTHUSIASM.
AFTER ALL, HE COULD BE
THE HERO OF TOMORROW.
OR THE VILLAIN.
BESIDES...
I REMEMBER ANOTHER
YOUNG WHIPPERSNAPPER
WHO WANTED TO BE A SUPER-HERO.
( chuckles )
YOU DON'T EVEN REMEMBER
BREAKFAST, YOU OLD COOT.
( crying )
MAYBE THE CONCH SIGNAL
IS TOO MUCH RESPONSIBILITY.
BUT HOW WOULD YOU LIKE
TO SPEND THE REST OF THE
AFTERNOON... ON PATROL?
WHAT?!
TO THE INVISIBLE
BOATMOBILE!
SpongeBob:
♪ OH... ♪
SpongeBob and MermaidMan:
♪ JINGLE BELLS ♪
♪ MERMAIDMAN SMELLS,
BARNACLEBOY LAID AN EGG ♪
♪ THE INVISIBLE BOATMOBILE
LOST A WHEEL AND... ♪
HEY, CAN I DRIVE?
DRIVE?
WHAT DO YOU KNOW
ABOUT DRIVING
THE INVISIBLE BOATMOBILE?
TONS! LIKE THE WINDSHIELD WIPERS
ARE RIGHT HERE.
DON'T TOUCH THAT BUTTON!
IT'S THE...
( grunting and groaning )
...ORIGAMI BUTTON.
MermaidMan:
WHEN YOU'RE PATROLLING THE CITY,
YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO BE VIGILANT.
ON YOUR TOES,
CONSTANTLY ALERT.
ALWAYS EXPECT
THE UNEXPECTED.
( both gasp )
( screaming... )
I'VE GOT THE DONUTS!
SpongeBob and MermaidMan:
♪ ...AND BARNACLEBOY
LAID AN EGG, HEY, HEY! ♪
OH, THAT FELLOW
OVER THERE
USED TO BE
THE ATOMIC FLOUNDER.
I KNOW HE DOESN'T
LOOK LIKE MUCH
BUT HE COULD
GO BACK TO CRIME...
( snaps fingers )
...JUST LIKE THAT.
( both laugh )
Flounder:
HELP! HELP!
HELP, SOMEBODY THERE!
YOU'RE UNDER ARREST,
ATOMIC FLOUNDER!
STOP, KID, STOP!
LET HIM GO!
YOU SAID HE COULD SNAP...
JUST LIKE THAT.
WHAT?!
GET OFF OF ME!
IF I WEREN'T RETIRED,
I, I'D...
( roaring )
DO THAT.
OUT OF MY WAY, PUNK!
SpongeBob:
I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!
I RODE IN
THE INVISIBLE BOATMOBILE
MET A VILLAIN AND LEARNED
TO TREAT THIRD-DEGREE BURNS,
ALL IN ONE DAY.
WHAT ARE WE DOING TOMORROW?
UH... SAY, KID,
WHY DON'T YOU
TAKE THIS NICKEL
AND GO OVER THERE
AND SEE IF OUR THEME SONG
IS ON THE JUKEBOX?
OKAY.
YOU KNOW, FOR
A PAIN IN THE NECK
HE'S A PRETTY NICE KID.
LET'S DITCH HIM.
RIGHT BEHIND YOU.
IT DOESN'T SEEM TO BE HERE.
OH, IT'S THERE,
ALL RIGHT.
KEEP LOOKING.
DILIGENCE,
DILIGENCE.
AYE-AYE, SIR!
( both chuckling )
DAGNABBIT!
WHAT'S THE MATTER?
WHERE DID WE PARK
THE INVISIBLE BOATMOBILE?
AW, THAT'S THE 15th TIME
I'VE LOOKED.
( in dramatic voice ):
BUT I CAN'T LET MY HEROES DOWN!
BOATMOBILE? WHERE ARE YOU?
BARNACLEBOY, I FOUND IT!
( starts engine )
( sizzling )
( menacing laughter )
STILL GETTING BURNED
ON THAT TAILPIPE,
HUH, BARNACLEBOY?
( laughing )
IT'S THE DIRTY BUBBLE!
IN ALL HIS DIRTY
ROUNDNESS!
Both:
OH, NO!
I FOUND IT!
AND IT'S THE SPECIAL DANCE MIX.
MermaidMan and BarnacleBoy:
HELP! HELP!
( Dirty Bubble laughing )
HELP! HELP!
HOLY CRABBY PATTIES!
MERMAIDMAN AND BARNACLEBOY'S
ARCHNEMESIS!
THE DIRTY BUBBLE!
I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!
( laughing )
YOU CANNOT SAVE THEM,
SPONGE OF MYSTERY!
THEY ARE TRAPPED BY MY AWESOME
SURFACE TENSION! ( laughs )
YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!
YOU'RE MY MOST FAVORITE
SUPERVILLAIN!
CAN I HAVE YOUR AUTOGRAPH?
OH, NO, YOU FOOL!
STAY BACK! THE POINT!
OOH, OOH, OOH!
WATCH THE POINT! AAH!
( MermaidMan laughs )
YOU SAVED US, SON!
YEAH, YOU'RE,
YOU'RE A HERO!
I AM?
ARE YOU UP
FOR ANOTHER RIDE
IN THE INVISIBLE
BOATMOBILE?
♪ OH... ♪
♪ JINGLE BELLS,
MERMAIDMAN SMELLS ♪
♪ BARNACLEBOY LAID AN EGG ♪
♪ THE DIRTY BUBBLE POPPED
AND MERMAIDMAN AND BARNACLEBOY
AND SPONGEBOB GOT AWAY! YAY! ♪
BarnacleBoy:
WATCH OUT.
[Captioning sponsored by THE
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
and NICKELODEON]
Captioned by The Caption Center
WGBH Educational Foundation]