SpongeBob SquarePants (1999–…): Season 1, Episode 15 - Sleepy Time/Suds - full transcript
Sleepy Time: One night, SpongeBob suddenly posses the amazing ability to visit the dreams of his friends and neighbors. As he visits from one dream to the next, SpongeBob gets involved in their personal fantasies, for better or worse. The residents of Bikini Bottom, however, aren't too happy about this new addition to their nightly slumber. Suds: SpongeBob comes down with a case of the dreaded 'Suds', an illness which turns him into a sniffly, sneezing, bubble-maker. A mandatory visit to the doctor's office is sidetracked, however, when Patrick convinces him that such a move hold unspeakable horrors (like old magazines!). It's up to Sandy to knock some sense into the boys.
ARE YOU READY, KIDS?
Kids:
AYE, AYE, CAPTAIN!
I CAN'T HEAR YOU.
( louder ):
AYE, AYE, CAPTAIN!
♪ OH... ♪
♪ WHO LIVES IN A PINEAPPLE
UNDER THE SEA? ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ ABSORBENT AND YELLOW
AND POROUS IS HE. ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ IF NAUTICAL NONSENSE BE
SOMETHING YOU WISH... ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ THEN DROP ON THE DECK
AND FLOP LIKE A FISH. ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ READY?
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
( laughs heartily )
[Captioning sponsored by THE
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
( plays airy tune )
and NICKELODEON]
SpongeBob:
AH! TIME FOR BED, GARY.
( pop )
( meows )
OH, GARY!
YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY:
CURIOSITY SALTED THE SNAIL.
MIND YOUR WANDERING EYE,
YOU LITTLE MOLLUSK.
SWEET DREAMS, GARY.
( snoring and squeaking )
SpongeBob:
HEY! OVER HERE!
( laughing )
( engine revs )
( tires squealing )
WAIT A MINUTE!
I DON'T HAVE A DRIVER'S LICENSE.
( horn honks )
WOW!
MY DRIVER'S LICENSE.
I CAN'T BELIEVE IT.
I SURE TAKE A GOOD PICTURE.
DARN! I SHOULD HAVE
GROWN A MOUSTACHE.
( tires bumping )
DUH-DOO-DUH-DUH,
DUH-DOO...!
HOW COULD I HAVE FORGOTTEN THE
MOST IMPORTANT RULE OF DRIVING?
ALWAYS WEAR YOUR SEATBELT.
HEY! I CAN SEE
THE KRUSTY KRAB FROM HERE.
MRS. PUFF, LOOK!
I FINALLY GOT
MY DRIVER'S LICENSE.
NOT EVEN IN YOUR DREAMS,
MR. SQUAREPANTS.
( yelling )
OUCH!
WHERE AM I?
IS THAT ME?
OR IS THIS ME?
AM I STILL DREAMING?
( Gary meowing
and snoring )
THIS MUST BE GARY'S DREAM.
I'M GOING TO GET
A CLOSER LOOK.
WHOA!
WOW, LOOK AT ALL THESE BOOKS.
I WONDER WHERE GARY IS.
GARY!
HUH?
EXCUSE ME, SIR.
HAVE YOU SEEN...
SPONGEBOB?!
GARY?
HOW DARE YOU INVADE
THE SANCTITY OF MY DREAMS!
GARY! YOU CAN TALK!
( sighs )
IN DREAMS, ONE IS NOT TETHERED
BY EARTHLY LIMITATIONS.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
COME.
FOR AGES, DREAMS
HAVE BEEN THOUGHT OF
AS WINDOWS
TO ANOTHER REALM.
"LET ME NOT MAR
THAT PERFECT DREAM
"BY AN AURORAL STAIN
"BUT SO ADJUST
MY DAILY NIGHT
THAT IT MAY
COME AGAIN."
EMILY DICKINSON
WROTE THAT.
WHO?
HERE'S ONE YOU MIGHT KNOW.
( clears throat )
"THERE ONCE WAS A MAN FROM PERU
"WHO DREAMED HE WAS
EATING HIS SHOE
"HE WOKE WITH A FRIGHT
IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT
TO FIND THAT HIS DREAM
HAD COME TRUE."
( laughs )
GEE, GARY,
YOU SURE ARE SMART.
DID YOU THINK
MY SHELL WAS
FULL OF HOT AIR?
THANKS
FOR THE INFO, GARY.
I'M GOING BACK
TO MY OWN DREAM.
BEWARE OF YOUR WANDERING EYE,
YOU LITTLE PORIFERAN.
( snoring nearby )
I WONDER WHAT
PATRICK'S DREAMING.
I CAN'T RESIST.
( laughs )
( carnival music playing )
HEY, PATRICK!
HEY, SPONGEBOB.
YOU KNOW, PATRICK,
THIS IS A DREAM.
YOU CAN DO
ANYTHING YOU WANT.
YEP.
I MEAN ANYTHING.
WATCH-- I CAN TURN
INTO A SKYSCRAPER.
GOING UP!
HUH?
I CAN MAKE...
A MILLION OF ME!
HUH? HUH?
YUP.
AW,
TARTAR SAUCE.
I'M GOING TO
A DIFFERENT DREAM.
OKAY.
BYE, SPONGEBOB.
( music stops, change jingles )
( grunts )
SHOOT!
THAT WAS MY LAST QUARTER.
( snoring nearby )
( Squidward moaning, snoring )
OH, THIS IS GOING TO BE GOOD!
( clarinet playing solo )
( audience applauds )
SpongeBob:
PSST! SQUIDWARD!
HEY, SQUIDWARD!
SPONGEBOB!
( someone clears
throat )
WHY DO YOU STOP PLAYING,
WOLFGANG AMADEUS TENTACLES?
YES, YOUR HIGHNESS.
( continues tune )
( king laughing )
( whispering )
SPONGEBOB!
HEY, I HAVE NOT
INSTRUCTED YOU TO STOP!
NOW, PLAY!
DO TELL ME THE ONE
ABOUT THE MAN
FROM PERU AGAIN.
SPONGE...!
( crack )
( all gasp )
( weakly ):
BOB.
I CAME HERE TO HEAR
BEAUTIFUL MUSIC.
IF I DON'T GET MY WISH,
IT'LL BE YOUR HEAD!
( laughing nervously )
SpongeBob:
PSST!
SQUIDWARD!
HUH? HUH?
NO... WAY.
( king clears
throat loudly )
PLEASE, SPONGEBOB.
NO TRICKS.
TRUST ME, SQUIDWARD.
( SpongeBob singing
raucously )
( all gasp )
SPONGEBOB!
( whimpering ):
WHY HAVE YOU STOPPED PLAYING
THAT WONDERFUL MUSIC?
( singing raucously )
HIS MUSIC TOUCHES ME
EVER SO.
I FEAR THAT MY TEARS
MIGHT STAIN MY PETTICOAT.
( audience cheering )
THANK YOU,
THANK YOU, THANK YOU.
( fans cheering and yelling )
WHAT IS THIS INSTRUMENT
THAT PRODUCES
SUCH LOVELY SOUND?
( all gasp )
SO LONG, SQUIDWARD!
( groaning in frustration )
( laughing delightedly )
( grumbling )
HEY! I'M AT SANDY'S.
( laughs )
AW, THIS LOOKS NEAT.
I WONDER...
( yelling )
HEY, SPONGEBOB,
WHAT BRINGS YOU HERE?
HEY, SANDY.
WHAT'S GOING ON?
WELL, WE'RE
FREE-FALLING
FROM 114,000 FEET
AND WE'LL LAND
ON THAT ITTY-BITTY TARGET.
THIS SEEMS
KIND OF DANGEROUS!
NOT AS LONG AS YOU GOT
A BIG, OLD PARACHUTE.
OKAY!
NOT "PAIR OF SHOES,"
SPONGEBOB--
"PARA-CHUTE."
GOT YOU.
( singing )
NOT A "PARAKEET"-- PARA...
( splat )
MADE IT.
( SpongeBob yelling )
OUCH.
ALL RIGHT, THAT'S IT.
NO MORE MESSING
WITH PEOPLE'S DREAMS.
( laughs )
HEY!
MR. KRABS.
UH... MR. KRABS?
Pearl:
HELLO,
SPONGEBOB.
OH, PEARL, THIS IS YOUR DREAM.
YOU'RE JUST IN TIME
FOR THE TEA PARTY.
I WAS LOOKING
FOR YOUR DAD'S DREAM.
OH.
HE'S NEXT DOOR.
BOYS DON'T UNDERSTAND THE
SOPHISTICATION OF TEA PARTIES.
RIGHT, MR. STUFFY?
BYE.
I BET MR. KRABS'S DREAM
WILL BE MORE ROBUST.
Krabs:
I GOT YOU NOW,
YOU SLIPPERY DEMON!
YOU'RE PUTTING UP
A GOOD FIGHT.
YES, YOU ARE!
WHAT YOU DOING,
MR. KRABS?
I'M PICKING
NEPTUNE'S POCKET!
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
I'M TALKING ABOUT
COLD, HARD, FLIPPING CASH!
IT'S THE MIGHTY MOBY DOLLAR!
DO YOU SEE HER, BOY?
I GOT HER--
HERE SHE COMES.
THAR SHE BLOWS!
( laughing ):
LOOK, MR. KRABS!
PENNIES!
NEVER MIND
THE SMALL CHANGE, LAD.
GET THE NET.
THIS ONE?
NO-- THE MONEY NET.
IT'S IN ME BACK POCKET.
WOW! YOU LOOK REAL GOOD
WITH A MOUSTACHE, MR. KRABS.
NEVER MIND THAT, BOY.
READY THE NET!
NET READY, SIR!
I DID IT!
( laughing with joy )
I FINALLY DID IT!
CONGRATULATIONS, MR. KRABS.
NO, SPONGEBOB!
DON'T LET IT GO!
GET IT, SPONGEBOB,
GET IT, GET IT!
COME BACK! HEY, HEY!
Krabs:
NO!
( cash register bell dinging )
THIS'LL MAKE A GREAT
FISH STORY, EH, MR. KRABS?
OH, SPONGEBOB...
YES, MR. KRABS?
YOU'RE FIRED!
( gun fires )
( SpongeBob yelling )
HEY, PLANKTON'S DREAMING
ABOUT BIKINI BOTTOM.
Plankton:
ZAP!
( creatures yelling )
I SEE YOU.
ZAP!
I SEE YOU.
ZAP!
PLANKTON.
I SEE YOU!
ZAP!
( creatures yelling )
OH, LOOK,
IT'S THE KRUSTY KRAB
HOME OF THE KRABBY PATTY.
CRUSH!
LICK, LICK!
THIS ISN'T A DREAM.
THIS IS A NIGHTMARE.
( Gary meows )
( feet squeal )
GARY!
GARY! NO!
( meows )
HERE, KITTY,
KITTY, KITTY.
GARY!
I'VE GOT YOU, GARY.
PEEKABOO!
HERE COMES MY FOOT!
YEAH!
HUH?
YOW!
I THINK
HE'S GOT THE POINT.
( laughs )
( air rushing out )
WHOA!
( scream grows higher,
then stops )
WELL, I GUESS I'VE GOT
SOME EXPLAINING TO DO, HUH?
NO, NO, NO!
NO, NOT THE FACE!
( yells )
( snoring )
AH, THAT WAS FUN AND ALL
BUT IT'S GOOD TO BE BACK
IN MY OWN DREAM CLOUD.
( grunts contentedly )
Various voices ( echoing ):
SPONGEBOB! SPONGEBOB!
SPONGEBOB!
SPONGEBOB!
SPONGEBOB!
SPONGEBOB!
WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?
LEAVE ME ALONE.
( voices echoing )
Squidward:
SPONGEBOB,
SPONGEBOB!
STOP!
HEY! WHAT ARE
YOU ALL DOING
IN YOUR PAJAMAS?
ARE WE HAVING
A SLUMBER PARTY?
NO, WE ARE NOT HAVING
A SLUMBER PARTY.
DO US ALL
A FAVOR, SPONGEBOB
AND STAY OUT
OF OUR DREAMS.
( all grumbling )
DON'T WE GET ENOUGH
OF YOU DURING THE DAY?
( meows angrily )
DOES ANYONE
HAVE A QUARTER?
( snoring )
( thunder rumbles )
( thunder crackles )
( yelps )
IT'S RAINING KRABBY PATTIES!
YEAH!
( moaning )
HUH?
( stomach growls )
A QUICK MIDNIGHT SNACK,
AND THEN IT'S BACK TO BED.
( Gary meows )
AH, SLEEP TIGHT,
MY LITTLE ANGEL.
( snores, meows )
( stairs creak )
AH, HERE IT IS.
NOTHING LIKE A SEA-NUT BUTTER
AND JELLYFISH JELLY SANDWICH
TO HELP YOU GET TO SLEEP.
( snoring )
( "Dance Of the Sugarplum
Fairy" playing )
( alarm clock ticking; click;
foghorn blows loudly )
( teeth chattering )
( yelps )
THE FRIDGE!
( quavering )
( teeth clatter )
( shudders )
WHOA!
OOP!
( groans )
( teeth clatter )
( meows )
OH, GARY,
I DON'T FEEL LIKE MYSELF.
( meows )
DON'T BE SILLY, GARY.
I DON'T GET COLDS.
I GET THE SUDS.
( meows )
NO, GARY... ( sniffles )
IF I HAD THE SUDS, I'D HAVE
BUBBLES COMING OUT OF ME.
( gears up to sneeze,
then sneezes )
( moans exhaustedly )
( meows )
I CAN'T GET THE SUDS
BECAUSE THEN
I'LL HAVE TO MISS WORK.
( sniffles )
( suppresses sneeze )
( meows )
NO, GARY.
I LIKE WEARING
MY UNDERWEAR LIKE THIS.
( Gary meows )
I'M NOT SICK.
I'M GOING TO WORK.
( suppresses sneeze )
SPONGEBOB,
WHAT'S HOLDING UP
THOSE PATTIES?
RIGHT AWAY, SIR.
SPONGEBOB,
WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?
YOU'RE PALER
THAN A BABY SEA HORSE.
( meows )
THE SUDS?
HERE'S THAT PATTY
YOU WANTED, MR. KRABS, SIR.
( gearing up to sneeze )
ALL RIGHT, SPONGEBOB,
YOU'RE TOO SICK TO WORK.
NO, MR. KRABS, I'M OKAY, HONEST.
NO, NOW GO HOME
AND GET SOME REST.
NOTHING PERSONAL, LAD.
I JUST CAN'T HAVE YOU SNEEZING
ALL OVER MY FOOD.
Customers:
HUH?!
( customers shouting )
NO, WAIT. WAIT!
( screaming )
OH, GARY...
( sniffles )
I FEEL HORRIBLE.
( sneezes )
OH, WHO AM I KIDDING, GARY?
I'VE GOT THE SUDS,
NO DOUBT ABOUT IT.
( sniffles )
( sneezes )
I BETTER TAKE CARE OF THIS
BEFORE IT GETS OUT OF HAND.
( phone cuckoos )
HELLO.
SANDY, I'M SICK.
CAN YOU ESCORT ME
TO THE DOCTOR'S?
OH, SURE, SPONGEBOB
I'LL BE THERE FASTER
THAN A BAREFOOT JACKRABBIT
ON A HOT GREASY GRIDDLE
IN THE MIDDLE OF AUGUST...
Yeah, Sandy, thanks.
( sneezes )
( doorbell rings )
COMING.
HEY, SPONGEBOB.
GOING SKIING?
I'M SICK, PATRICK.
I'M GOING TO THE DOCTOR.
WHAT? OH, YOU CAN'T GO!
WHY NOT, PATRICK?
I KNOW A GUY
WHO KNOWS A GUY
WHO WENT
TO THE DOCTOR ONCE
AND THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE IS
A HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE PLACE.
IT CAN'T BE
AS HORRIBLE AS THE SUDS.
( sneezes )
OH, IT IS, SPONGEBOB!
WELL, FIRST THEY MAKE YOU
SIT IN THE... WAITING ROOM.
IS THAT THE HORRIBLE PART,
PATRICK?
NO, IT GETS WORSE.
THEY MAKE YOU READ
OLD MAGAZINES.
( yelps )
THEN THE DOCTOR PULLS OUT
HIS STETHOSCOPE.
NO!
YES!
IT'S A DEVICE
SO SINISTER
SO ICY COLD
WHEN IT TOUCHES
YOUR BARE FLESH
IT... ( hisses )
( shrieks )
NO! NO! NO STETHOSCOPE!
NO DOCTOR!
NO OLD MAGAZINES!
NO... ( hisses ) NO!
PATRICK, I DON'T WANT
TO GO THE DOCTOR.
EXACTLY.
( sneezes )
YOU GOT TO HELP ME
GET BETTER, PATRICK.
( sniffles ):
PLEASE?
WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE
MY DOCTOR, PATRICK?
WHAT ELSE ARE FRIENDS FOR?
( gears up to sneeze;
sneezes )
IT APPEARS AS THOUGH
WE'LL HAVE TO PLUG UP
THESE HOLES.
THIS OUGHT TO DO
THE TRICK.
VOILA.
( starts to sneeze,
then stops )
FEEL BETTER?
I DON'T KNOW.
( sneezes, sneeze
gets stifled )
( sneezes, sneeze
gets stifled )
( sneezes, sneeze
gets stifled )
HELP, I'M SHRINKING.
NO! PLEASE,
DON'T HURT ME!
NO BUBBLES!
PATRICK, YOUR TREATMENT
IS WORKING.
YOU THINK SO?
SURE!
AT THIS RATE
I'LL BE CURED IN NO TIME.
IN FACT, I'M GOING
TO CALL SANDY
AND TELL HER
NOT TO COME.
THANKS, DR. PATRICK.
AND THEY SAID I'D NEVER MAKE
ANYTHING OUT OF MYSELF.
( groans )
MY FINGERS ARE TOO BIG
FOR THE BUTTONS.
( sniffles )
DR. PATRICK,
COULD YOU CALL SANDY FOR ME?
SURE, PATIENT SPONGEBOB.
( phone cuckoos )
HELLO, SANDY?
HIYA, PATRICK.
I'M CALLING ON BEHALF
OF MY PATIENT, SPONGEBOB.
I'M ON MY WAY OVER
TO TAKE HIM
TO THE HOSPITAL.
UH... UH... THAT WILL
NO LONGER BE REQUIRED.
HE IS IN MY CARE
AS OF TODAY.
WELL, I'M COMING OVER
TO TAKE A LOOK.
I'LL BE OVER THERE
FASTER THAN A BAREFOOT
JACKRABBIT ON A HOT...
OH, YEAH, YEAH,
THE RABBIT.
DON'T BOTHER, SANDY.
SPONGEBOB, QUICK,
SANDY'S COMING.
WE'VE GOT TO MAKE
SURE YOU'RE WELL
OR SHE'LL TAKE YOU
TO THE DOCTOR.
DON'T TOUCH ME, I'M STERILE.
SCALPEL, PLEASE.
FEELING BETTER?
UH-UH.
FELLING BETTER YET?
NOT REALLY.
HOW...
ABOUT...
NOW?
( groans ):
I DON'T...
( groans ):
THINK SO.
FEELING BETTER?
NO.
( shrieks )
HOW ABOUT NOW?
NOPE.
( shrieks )
HOW ABOUT NOW?
UH-UH.
( shrieks )
Sandy:
HELLO, SPONGEBOB.
( Gregorian chant plays )
UH-OH, IT'S SANDY.
( sneeze gets
stifled )
Patrick:
THERE'S NO ONE HOME.
PATRICK, YOU
OPEN THIS DOOR.
( sighs )
PATRICK, SOMETIMES
I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND YOU.
( SpongeBob sneezes,
sneeze gets stifled )
HEY!
OKAY, PATRICK,
WHERE'S SPONGEBOB?
UH... UH...
HE'S NOT HERE AT THE MOMENT.
PLEASE LEAVE A MESSAGE
AFTER THE BEEP.
( imitates beep )
OKAY, NOW, TELL ME.
SINCE WHEN DO YOU
HAVE TWO HOUSES?
SINCE I RAN OUT OF SPACE
TO PUT MY STUFF.
UH-HUH, YEP.
SINCE WHEN
DOES YOUR HOUSE HAVE FEET?
THIS IS MY MOBILE HOME.
( SpongeBob sneezes,
sneeze gets stifled )
HIYA, SANDY.
HMM, THE DIRT THERAPY
SEEMS TO BE WORKING
JUST FINE.
PATRICK, SPONGEBOB HAS TO SEE
A REAL DOCTOR.
NO, HE DOESN'T!
I'M TAKING CARE OF HIM!
SHOW HER, SPONGEBOB.
SAY "AH."
AH...
( birds tweeting )
( crackling; tweeting stops )
SEE? HE'S EVEN WORSE
THAN I THOUGHT.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
HE'S FINE.
I'M OKAY, SANDY, REALLY.
( gears up to sneeze )
( sneeze gets stifled )
I'M TAKING YOU
TO THE DOCTOR
RIGHT NOW.
HEY, THAT'S MY PATIENT.
YOU CAN'T TAKE HIM
TO THE DOCTOR'S.
DON'T BE SILLY,
PATRICK.
Patrick:
HE'S MINE.
Sandy:
SPONGEBOB, YOU'LL
BE BETTER SOON.
I'LL SAVE YOU!
I'M BA-BA-BA-BA-BA-BETTER,
GUYS, REALLY.
( Patrick and Sandy grunt )
NOW LOOK WHAT
YOU'VE DONE, PATRICK.
WHAT I'VE DONE?
EVERYTHING WAS FINE
UNTIL YOU SHOWED UP.
YOU SHOULD BE ARRESTED
FOR IMPERSONATING
A DOCTOR.
HEY, I'M A GOOD DOCTOR.
RIGHT!
HUH?
SPONGEBOB?
I CAN'T STOP NOW!
HELP ME!
SHINY TINES.
MR. KRABS!
SPONGEBOB?
STOP, SPONGEBOB!
( yelping )
STOP!
OH!
( gears up to sneeze )
( sneezes explosively )
WELL, MR. SQUAREPANTS,
IT SEEMS YOU HAVE THE SUDS.
ARE YOU READY
FOR YOUR TREATMENT?
( sniffles )
YOU'RE NOT GOING
TO MAKE ME
READ OLD MAGAZINES,
ARE YOU?
NO, SILLY, YOU GET
THE SPONGE TREATMENT.
OH, HANS.
( SpongeBob whoops )
SpongeBob:
YEAH!
( chuckles ):
THIS TICKLES.
( sniffles )
I CAN SMELL AGAIN!
( whoops )
( cheers )
( whoops )
YEAH!
I FEEL AS GOOD AS NEW.
I LOVE THE DOCTOR!
Hans:
HERE'S YOUR LOLLIPOP.
A LOLLIPOP?
HEY, DOC, I GOT THE SUDS, TOO.
OH, YES, DR. PATRICK.
WE HAVE A SPECIAL
TREATMENT FOR YOU.
( guffaws )
( Patrick guffaws )
Patrick:
HEY, WAIT.
OUCH! OOH, THAT HURTS.
WAIT!
HEY, THIS DOESN'T SEEM RIGHT!
[Captioning sponsored by THE
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
and NICKELODEON]
[Captioned by
The Caption Center
WGBH Educational Foundation]
Kids:
AYE, AYE, CAPTAIN!
I CAN'T HEAR YOU.
( louder ):
AYE, AYE, CAPTAIN!
♪ OH... ♪
♪ WHO LIVES IN A PINEAPPLE
UNDER THE SEA? ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ ABSORBENT AND YELLOW
AND POROUS IS HE. ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ IF NAUTICAL NONSENSE BE
SOMETHING YOU WISH... ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ THEN DROP ON THE DECK
AND FLOP LIKE A FISH. ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ READY?
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! ♪
( laughs heartily )
[Captioning sponsored by THE
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
( plays airy tune )
and NICKELODEON]
SpongeBob:
AH! TIME FOR BED, GARY.
( pop )
( meows )
OH, GARY!
YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY:
CURIOSITY SALTED THE SNAIL.
MIND YOUR WANDERING EYE,
YOU LITTLE MOLLUSK.
SWEET DREAMS, GARY.
( snoring and squeaking )
SpongeBob:
HEY! OVER HERE!
( laughing )
( engine revs )
( tires squealing )
WAIT A MINUTE!
I DON'T HAVE A DRIVER'S LICENSE.
( horn honks )
WOW!
MY DRIVER'S LICENSE.
I CAN'T BELIEVE IT.
I SURE TAKE A GOOD PICTURE.
DARN! I SHOULD HAVE
GROWN A MOUSTACHE.
( tires bumping )
DUH-DOO-DUH-DUH,
DUH-DOO...!
HOW COULD I HAVE FORGOTTEN THE
MOST IMPORTANT RULE OF DRIVING?
ALWAYS WEAR YOUR SEATBELT.
HEY! I CAN SEE
THE KRUSTY KRAB FROM HERE.
MRS. PUFF, LOOK!
I FINALLY GOT
MY DRIVER'S LICENSE.
NOT EVEN IN YOUR DREAMS,
MR. SQUAREPANTS.
( yelling )
OUCH!
WHERE AM I?
IS THAT ME?
OR IS THIS ME?
AM I STILL DREAMING?
( Gary meowing
and snoring )
THIS MUST BE GARY'S DREAM.
I'M GOING TO GET
A CLOSER LOOK.
WHOA!
WOW, LOOK AT ALL THESE BOOKS.
I WONDER WHERE GARY IS.
GARY!
HUH?
EXCUSE ME, SIR.
HAVE YOU SEEN...
SPONGEBOB?!
GARY?
HOW DARE YOU INVADE
THE SANCTITY OF MY DREAMS!
GARY! YOU CAN TALK!
( sighs )
IN DREAMS, ONE IS NOT TETHERED
BY EARTHLY LIMITATIONS.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
COME.
FOR AGES, DREAMS
HAVE BEEN THOUGHT OF
AS WINDOWS
TO ANOTHER REALM.
"LET ME NOT MAR
THAT PERFECT DREAM
"BY AN AURORAL STAIN
"BUT SO ADJUST
MY DAILY NIGHT
THAT IT MAY
COME AGAIN."
EMILY DICKINSON
WROTE THAT.
WHO?
HERE'S ONE YOU MIGHT KNOW.
( clears throat )
"THERE ONCE WAS A MAN FROM PERU
"WHO DREAMED HE WAS
EATING HIS SHOE
"HE WOKE WITH A FRIGHT
IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT
TO FIND THAT HIS DREAM
HAD COME TRUE."
( laughs )
GEE, GARY,
YOU SURE ARE SMART.
DID YOU THINK
MY SHELL WAS
FULL OF HOT AIR?
THANKS
FOR THE INFO, GARY.
I'M GOING BACK
TO MY OWN DREAM.
BEWARE OF YOUR WANDERING EYE,
YOU LITTLE PORIFERAN.
( snoring nearby )
I WONDER WHAT
PATRICK'S DREAMING.
I CAN'T RESIST.
( laughs )
( carnival music playing )
HEY, PATRICK!
HEY, SPONGEBOB.
YOU KNOW, PATRICK,
THIS IS A DREAM.
YOU CAN DO
ANYTHING YOU WANT.
YEP.
I MEAN ANYTHING.
WATCH-- I CAN TURN
INTO A SKYSCRAPER.
GOING UP!
HUH?
I CAN MAKE...
A MILLION OF ME!
HUH? HUH?
YUP.
AW,
TARTAR SAUCE.
I'M GOING TO
A DIFFERENT DREAM.
OKAY.
BYE, SPONGEBOB.
( music stops, change jingles )
( grunts )
SHOOT!
THAT WAS MY LAST QUARTER.
( snoring nearby )
( Squidward moaning, snoring )
OH, THIS IS GOING TO BE GOOD!
( clarinet playing solo )
( audience applauds )
SpongeBob:
PSST! SQUIDWARD!
HEY, SQUIDWARD!
SPONGEBOB!
( someone clears
throat )
WHY DO YOU STOP PLAYING,
WOLFGANG AMADEUS TENTACLES?
YES, YOUR HIGHNESS.
( continues tune )
( king laughing )
( whispering )
SPONGEBOB!
HEY, I HAVE NOT
INSTRUCTED YOU TO STOP!
NOW, PLAY!
DO TELL ME THE ONE
ABOUT THE MAN
FROM PERU AGAIN.
SPONGE...!
( crack )
( all gasp )
( weakly ):
BOB.
I CAME HERE TO HEAR
BEAUTIFUL MUSIC.
IF I DON'T GET MY WISH,
IT'LL BE YOUR HEAD!
( laughing nervously )
SpongeBob:
PSST!
SQUIDWARD!
HUH? HUH?
NO... WAY.
( king clears
throat loudly )
PLEASE, SPONGEBOB.
NO TRICKS.
TRUST ME, SQUIDWARD.
( SpongeBob singing
raucously )
( all gasp )
SPONGEBOB!
( whimpering ):
WHY HAVE YOU STOPPED PLAYING
THAT WONDERFUL MUSIC?
( singing raucously )
HIS MUSIC TOUCHES ME
EVER SO.
I FEAR THAT MY TEARS
MIGHT STAIN MY PETTICOAT.
( audience cheering )
THANK YOU,
THANK YOU, THANK YOU.
( fans cheering and yelling )
WHAT IS THIS INSTRUMENT
THAT PRODUCES
SUCH LOVELY SOUND?
( all gasp )
SO LONG, SQUIDWARD!
( groaning in frustration )
( laughing delightedly )
( grumbling )
HEY! I'M AT SANDY'S.
( laughs )
AW, THIS LOOKS NEAT.
I WONDER...
( yelling )
HEY, SPONGEBOB,
WHAT BRINGS YOU HERE?
HEY, SANDY.
WHAT'S GOING ON?
WELL, WE'RE
FREE-FALLING
FROM 114,000 FEET
AND WE'LL LAND
ON THAT ITTY-BITTY TARGET.
THIS SEEMS
KIND OF DANGEROUS!
NOT AS LONG AS YOU GOT
A BIG, OLD PARACHUTE.
OKAY!
NOT "PAIR OF SHOES,"
SPONGEBOB--
"PARA-CHUTE."
GOT YOU.
( singing )
NOT A "PARAKEET"-- PARA...
( splat )
MADE IT.
( SpongeBob yelling )
OUCH.
ALL RIGHT, THAT'S IT.
NO MORE MESSING
WITH PEOPLE'S DREAMS.
( laughs )
HEY!
MR. KRABS.
UH... MR. KRABS?
Pearl:
HELLO,
SPONGEBOB.
OH, PEARL, THIS IS YOUR DREAM.
YOU'RE JUST IN TIME
FOR THE TEA PARTY.
I WAS LOOKING
FOR YOUR DAD'S DREAM.
OH.
HE'S NEXT DOOR.
BOYS DON'T UNDERSTAND THE
SOPHISTICATION OF TEA PARTIES.
RIGHT, MR. STUFFY?
BYE.
I BET MR. KRABS'S DREAM
WILL BE MORE ROBUST.
Krabs:
I GOT YOU NOW,
YOU SLIPPERY DEMON!
YOU'RE PUTTING UP
A GOOD FIGHT.
YES, YOU ARE!
WHAT YOU DOING,
MR. KRABS?
I'M PICKING
NEPTUNE'S POCKET!
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
I'M TALKING ABOUT
COLD, HARD, FLIPPING CASH!
IT'S THE MIGHTY MOBY DOLLAR!
DO YOU SEE HER, BOY?
I GOT HER--
HERE SHE COMES.
THAR SHE BLOWS!
( laughing ):
LOOK, MR. KRABS!
PENNIES!
NEVER MIND
THE SMALL CHANGE, LAD.
GET THE NET.
THIS ONE?
NO-- THE MONEY NET.
IT'S IN ME BACK POCKET.
WOW! YOU LOOK REAL GOOD
WITH A MOUSTACHE, MR. KRABS.
NEVER MIND THAT, BOY.
READY THE NET!
NET READY, SIR!
I DID IT!
( laughing with joy )
I FINALLY DID IT!
CONGRATULATIONS, MR. KRABS.
NO, SPONGEBOB!
DON'T LET IT GO!
GET IT, SPONGEBOB,
GET IT, GET IT!
COME BACK! HEY, HEY!
Krabs:
NO!
( cash register bell dinging )
THIS'LL MAKE A GREAT
FISH STORY, EH, MR. KRABS?
OH, SPONGEBOB...
YES, MR. KRABS?
YOU'RE FIRED!
( gun fires )
( SpongeBob yelling )
HEY, PLANKTON'S DREAMING
ABOUT BIKINI BOTTOM.
Plankton:
ZAP!
( creatures yelling )
I SEE YOU.
ZAP!
I SEE YOU.
ZAP!
PLANKTON.
I SEE YOU!
ZAP!
( creatures yelling )
OH, LOOK,
IT'S THE KRUSTY KRAB
HOME OF THE KRABBY PATTY.
CRUSH!
LICK, LICK!
THIS ISN'T A DREAM.
THIS IS A NIGHTMARE.
( Gary meows )
( feet squeal )
GARY!
GARY! NO!
( meows )
HERE, KITTY,
KITTY, KITTY.
GARY!
I'VE GOT YOU, GARY.
PEEKABOO!
HERE COMES MY FOOT!
YEAH!
HUH?
YOW!
I THINK
HE'S GOT THE POINT.
( laughs )
( air rushing out )
WHOA!
( scream grows higher,
then stops )
WELL, I GUESS I'VE GOT
SOME EXPLAINING TO DO, HUH?
NO, NO, NO!
NO, NOT THE FACE!
( yells )
( snoring )
AH, THAT WAS FUN AND ALL
BUT IT'S GOOD TO BE BACK
IN MY OWN DREAM CLOUD.
( grunts contentedly )
Various voices ( echoing ):
SPONGEBOB! SPONGEBOB!
SPONGEBOB!
SPONGEBOB!
SPONGEBOB!
SPONGEBOB!
WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?
LEAVE ME ALONE.
( voices echoing )
Squidward:
SPONGEBOB,
SPONGEBOB!
STOP!
HEY! WHAT ARE
YOU ALL DOING
IN YOUR PAJAMAS?
ARE WE HAVING
A SLUMBER PARTY?
NO, WE ARE NOT HAVING
A SLUMBER PARTY.
DO US ALL
A FAVOR, SPONGEBOB
AND STAY OUT
OF OUR DREAMS.
( all grumbling )
DON'T WE GET ENOUGH
OF YOU DURING THE DAY?
( meows angrily )
DOES ANYONE
HAVE A QUARTER?
( snoring )
( thunder rumbles )
( thunder crackles )
( yelps )
IT'S RAINING KRABBY PATTIES!
YEAH!
( moaning )
HUH?
( stomach growls )
A QUICK MIDNIGHT SNACK,
AND THEN IT'S BACK TO BED.
( Gary meows )
AH, SLEEP TIGHT,
MY LITTLE ANGEL.
( snores, meows )
( stairs creak )
AH, HERE IT IS.
NOTHING LIKE A SEA-NUT BUTTER
AND JELLYFISH JELLY SANDWICH
TO HELP YOU GET TO SLEEP.
( snoring )
( "Dance Of the Sugarplum
Fairy" playing )
( alarm clock ticking; click;
foghorn blows loudly )
( teeth chattering )
( yelps )
THE FRIDGE!
( quavering )
( teeth clatter )
( shudders )
WHOA!
OOP!
( groans )
( teeth clatter )
( meows )
OH, GARY,
I DON'T FEEL LIKE MYSELF.
( meows )
DON'T BE SILLY, GARY.
I DON'T GET COLDS.
I GET THE SUDS.
( meows )
NO, GARY... ( sniffles )
IF I HAD THE SUDS, I'D HAVE
BUBBLES COMING OUT OF ME.
( gears up to sneeze,
then sneezes )
( moans exhaustedly )
( meows )
I CAN'T GET THE SUDS
BECAUSE THEN
I'LL HAVE TO MISS WORK.
( sniffles )
( suppresses sneeze )
( meows )
NO, GARY.
I LIKE WEARING
MY UNDERWEAR LIKE THIS.
( Gary meows )
I'M NOT SICK.
I'M GOING TO WORK.
( suppresses sneeze )
SPONGEBOB,
WHAT'S HOLDING UP
THOSE PATTIES?
RIGHT AWAY, SIR.
SPONGEBOB,
WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?
YOU'RE PALER
THAN A BABY SEA HORSE.
( meows )
THE SUDS?
HERE'S THAT PATTY
YOU WANTED, MR. KRABS, SIR.
( gearing up to sneeze )
ALL RIGHT, SPONGEBOB,
YOU'RE TOO SICK TO WORK.
NO, MR. KRABS, I'M OKAY, HONEST.
NO, NOW GO HOME
AND GET SOME REST.
NOTHING PERSONAL, LAD.
I JUST CAN'T HAVE YOU SNEEZING
ALL OVER MY FOOD.
Customers:
HUH?!
( customers shouting )
NO, WAIT. WAIT!
( screaming )
OH, GARY...
( sniffles )
I FEEL HORRIBLE.
( sneezes )
OH, WHO AM I KIDDING, GARY?
I'VE GOT THE SUDS,
NO DOUBT ABOUT IT.
( sniffles )
( sneezes )
I BETTER TAKE CARE OF THIS
BEFORE IT GETS OUT OF HAND.
( phone cuckoos )
HELLO.
SANDY, I'M SICK.
CAN YOU ESCORT ME
TO THE DOCTOR'S?
OH, SURE, SPONGEBOB
I'LL BE THERE FASTER
THAN A BAREFOOT JACKRABBIT
ON A HOT GREASY GRIDDLE
IN THE MIDDLE OF AUGUST...
Yeah, Sandy, thanks.
( sneezes )
( doorbell rings )
COMING.
HEY, SPONGEBOB.
GOING SKIING?
I'M SICK, PATRICK.
I'M GOING TO THE DOCTOR.
WHAT? OH, YOU CAN'T GO!
WHY NOT, PATRICK?
I KNOW A GUY
WHO KNOWS A GUY
WHO WENT
TO THE DOCTOR ONCE
AND THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE IS
A HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE PLACE.
IT CAN'T BE
AS HORRIBLE AS THE SUDS.
( sneezes )
OH, IT IS, SPONGEBOB!
WELL, FIRST THEY MAKE YOU
SIT IN THE... WAITING ROOM.
IS THAT THE HORRIBLE PART,
PATRICK?
NO, IT GETS WORSE.
THEY MAKE YOU READ
OLD MAGAZINES.
( yelps )
THEN THE DOCTOR PULLS OUT
HIS STETHOSCOPE.
NO!
YES!
IT'S A DEVICE
SO SINISTER
SO ICY COLD
WHEN IT TOUCHES
YOUR BARE FLESH
IT... ( hisses )
( shrieks )
NO! NO! NO STETHOSCOPE!
NO DOCTOR!
NO OLD MAGAZINES!
NO... ( hisses ) NO!
PATRICK, I DON'T WANT
TO GO THE DOCTOR.
EXACTLY.
( sneezes )
YOU GOT TO HELP ME
GET BETTER, PATRICK.
( sniffles ):
PLEASE?
WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE
MY DOCTOR, PATRICK?
WHAT ELSE ARE FRIENDS FOR?
( gears up to sneeze;
sneezes )
IT APPEARS AS THOUGH
WE'LL HAVE TO PLUG UP
THESE HOLES.
THIS OUGHT TO DO
THE TRICK.
VOILA.
( starts to sneeze,
then stops )
FEEL BETTER?
I DON'T KNOW.
( sneezes, sneeze
gets stifled )
( sneezes, sneeze
gets stifled )
( sneezes, sneeze
gets stifled )
HELP, I'M SHRINKING.
NO! PLEASE,
DON'T HURT ME!
NO BUBBLES!
PATRICK, YOUR TREATMENT
IS WORKING.
YOU THINK SO?
SURE!
AT THIS RATE
I'LL BE CURED IN NO TIME.
IN FACT, I'M GOING
TO CALL SANDY
AND TELL HER
NOT TO COME.
THANKS, DR. PATRICK.
AND THEY SAID I'D NEVER MAKE
ANYTHING OUT OF MYSELF.
( groans )
MY FINGERS ARE TOO BIG
FOR THE BUTTONS.
( sniffles )
DR. PATRICK,
COULD YOU CALL SANDY FOR ME?
SURE, PATIENT SPONGEBOB.
( phone cuckoos )
HELLO, SANDY?
HIYA, PATRICK.
I'M CALLING ON BEHALF
OF MY PATIENT, SPONGEBOB.
I'M ON MY WAY OVER
TO TAKE HIM
TO THE HOSPITAL.
UH... UH... THAT WILL
NO LONGER BE REQUIRED.
HE IS IN MY CARE
AS OF TODAY.
WELL, I'M COMING OVER
TO TAKE A LOOK.
I'LL BE OVER THERE
FASTER THAN A BAREFOOT
JACKRABBIT ON A HOT...
OH, YEAH, YEAH,
THE RABBIT.
DON'T BOTHER, SANDY.
SPONGEBOB, QUICK,
SANDY'S COMING.
WE'VE GOT TO MAKE
SURE YOU'RE WELL
OR SHE'LL TAKE YOU
TO THE DOCTOR.
DON'T TOUCH ME, I'M STERILE.
SCALPEL, PLEASE.
FEELING BETTER?
UH-UH.
FELLING BETTER YET?
NOT REALLY.
HOW...
ABOUT...
NOW?
( groans ):
I DON'T...
( groans ):
THINK SO.
FEELING BETTER?
NO.
( shrieks )
HOW ABOUT NOW?
NOPE.
( shrieks )
HOW ABOUT NOW?
UH-UH.
( shrieks )
Sandy:
HELLO, SPONGEBOB.
( Gregorian chant plays )
UH-OH, IT'S SANDY.
( sneeze gets
stifled )
Patrick:
THERE'S NO ONE HOME.
PATRICK, YOU
OPEN THIS DOOR.
( sighs )
PATRICK, SOMETIMES
I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND YOU.
( SpongeBob sneezes,
sneeze gets stifled )
HEY!
OKAY, PATRICK,
WHERE'S SPONGEBOB?
UH... UH...
HE'S NOT HERE AT THE MOMENT.
PLEASE LEAVE A MESSAGE
AFTER THE BEEP.
( imitates beep )
OKAY, NOW, TELL ME.
SINCE WHEN DO YOU
HAVE TWO HOUSES?
SINCE I RAN OUT OF SPACE
TO PUT MY STUFF.
UH-HUH, YEP.
SINCE WHEN
DOES YOUR HOUSE HAVE FEET?
THIS IS MY MOBILE HOME.
( SpongeBob sneezes,
sneeze gets stifled )
HIYA, SANDY.
HMM, THE DIRT THERAPY
SEEMS TO BE WORKING
JUST FINE.
PATRICK, SPONGEBOB HAS TO SEE
A REAL DOCTOR.
NO, HE DOESN'T!
I'M TAKING CARE OF HIM!
SHOW HER, SPONGEBOB.
SAY "AH."
AH...
( birds tweeting )
( crackling; tweeting stops )
SEE? HE'S EVEN WORSE
THAN I THOUGHT.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
HE'S FINE.
I'M OKAY, SANDY, REALLY.
( gears up to sneeze )
( sneeze gets stifled )
I'M TAKING YOU
TO THE DOCTOR
RIGHT NOW.
HEY, THAT'S MY PATIENT.
YOU CAN'T TAKE HIM
TO THE DOCTOR'S.
DON'T BE SILLY,
PATRICK.
Patrick:
HE'S MINE.
Sandy:
SPONGEBOB, YOU'LL
BE BETTER SOON.
I'LL SAVE YOU!
I'M BA-BA-BA-BA-BA-BETTER,
GUYS, REALLY.
( Patrick and Sandy grunt )
NOW LOOK WHAT
YOU'VE DONE, PATRICK.
WHAT I'VE DONE?
EVERYTHING WAS FINE
UNTIL YOU SHOWED UP.
YOU SHOULD BE ARRESTED
FOR IMPERSONATING
A DOCTOR.
HEY, I'M A GOOD DOCTOR.
RIGHT!
HUH?
SPONGEBOB?
I CAN'T STOP NOW!
HELP ME!
SHINY TINES.
MR. KRABS!
SPONGEBOB?
STOP, SPONGEBOB!
( yelping )
STOP!
OH!
( gears up to sneeze )
( sneezes explosively )
WELL, MR. SQUAREPANTS,
IT SEEMS YOU HAVE THE SUDS.
ARE YOU READY
FOR YOUR TREATMENT?
( sniffles )
YOU'RE NOT GOING
TO MAKE ME
READ OLD MAGAZINES,
ARE YOU?
NO, SILLY, YOU GET
THE SPONGE TREATMENT.
OH, HANS.
( SpongeBob whoops )
SpongeBob:
YEAH!
( chuckles ):
THIS TICKLES.
( sniffles )
I CAN SMELL AGAIN!
( whoops )
( cheers )
( whoops )
YEAH!
I FEEL AS GOOD AS NEW.
I LOVE THE DOCTOR!
Hans:
HERE'S YOUR LOLLIPOP.
A LOLLIPOP?
HEY, DOC, I GOT THE SUDS, TOO.
OH, YES, DR. PATRICK.
WE HAVE A SPECIAL
TREATMENT FOR YOU.
( guffaws )
( Patrick guffaws )
Patrick:
HEY, WAIT.
OUCH! OOH, THAT HURTS.
WAIT!
HEY, THIS DOESN'T SEEM RIGHT!
[Captioning sponsored by THE
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
and NICKELODEON]
[Captioned by
The Caption Center
WGBH Educational Foundation]