Simon & Simon (1981–1989): Season 2, Episode 2 - Mike & Pat - full transcript

- Down! Let's go! Down!
- [explosion]


You know, you can catch
all the wild dolphins you want

between here and Mexico.

Why would anyone
steal a trained one?

I mean, what's the worst they
could do, have us for lunch?

Small fry like you
aren't even keepers.

They've been
together five years.

They'll die without
each other, I know it.

Well, what about
private collectors?

[Man] Nobody collects dolphins.

No hard feelings,
okay? We'll... Otto!

♪♪ [theme]

[bell buoy ringing]

[both whistling]

[whistling continues]

- [gasps]
- That's Mike.

That's the one we
want, right there.

That's our boy. Let's do it.


Let's go!



Let's go!

[dolphin whistling]


[crying] Gimme.



Gimme, gimme, gimme.

Gimme, gimme.


[Rick] Oceanside
Marina operator.

OS Marina op,

this is the motor vessel
Hole in the Water.

- Whiskey, Yankee, Bravo, 5510.
- [static]

[Woman] Got you, Hole
in the Water. Go ahead.

Yeah, I'd like to make
a collect call, please.

[telephone ringing]

[ringing continues]

Uh, no, no. Let it ring.

Don't let him use
up all his hot water.

Now what about that whale watch

you keep promising?

You just keep your
eyes on the tides, darlin'.



[OS Operator] Collect
call from Captain Nemo.

Will you accept?

[sighs] Reluctantly.

Go ahead, Hole.

And I'm here
whenever you're ready

to show me that great white.

Over and out.

Morning, A.J.
Front door is locked.

Yes, I know. There's a reason.

So what am I, some creep
not knowing enough to knock?

Come on, open it up. I just
want to take a quick shower.

Oh, I'm afraid all
the hot water's gone.

In the condition I'm
in, cold will do just fine.

Well, from the way
it sounded last night,

I think you ought
to try the canal.


By the way, what was
all that breaking glass?

Uh, Carlos came by
after work and, uh...

Did you know that you
can actually eat the worm

before you drank the mescal?

Gee, that's terrific. Let
me ask you a question.

Sure, I'd love to
join you for breakfast.

Uh, she's not your type.

You in any condition
to meet a client?

I'd rather meet your friend.

Not in this lifetime.

I'll see you outside
in about five.

Uh, fine. How about a shower?

No, thanks. I've
already had one.


- Come in, A.J.
- [static]

[Announcer over P.A.] Good
afternoon, ladies and gentlemen!

I'm Jim King,

and welcome to SeaWorld:
Dolphins in Harmony.

Today you'll be seeing
some of the coolest...

I'd like you to meet
my stars of the show

and some close
friends of mine...

- Corky, Ronnie...
- [crowd cheering]

Dolly, and Sigmund!

[applause, cheering]

Okay, guys, let's
say hi to everybody.

[applause, cheering]

Their boat must have been
anchored somewhere out there

because they came in
through our undersea gate.

The gates are chain-linked
and hydraulically operated.

The Coast Guard diver said
the locks had been jimmied.

Now, they were very efficient.

They only wanted Mike.

Now, who else
besides the trainers,

security people had
access to the tanks?

Well, the maintenance
crew and the veterinary staff.

We'll give you the same
list we provided for the police.

That's... That's all right.

We have a relationship
with the D.A.'s office.

- We'll be touching base.
- Fine.

About the police, we know
they're doing their best,

and it's not that we don't
have confidence in them,

but we just don't have time.

Who knows how long
either dolphin will survive

without the other.


Pat, they'll find Mike.

You've got to believe me.

Everything is going to
be all right, I promise you.

See, Pat? What
did I tell you, Pat?

We're going to
find Mike for you.

These men are going to
help us. Yeah, they are.

Joan, I'd like you to meet
A.J. Simon and his brother Rick.

- Hi. How do you do?
- Hi.

- Hi. How are you?
- Okay.

- Goodness.
- I'm glad you're here.


Hi, Pat. How are you doing?

Excuse me, I have to
meet some reporters.

Is there anything
else that I can do?

No, really. Just try and relax.

Yeah, especially
around this nice lady.

- Come on, now.
- [whimpers]

Yeah, we're going to be friends.

Yeah, good buddies.

That's right. Nice and smooth.

It's incredible.

I know.


[Joan] She wants more.


[Rick] Well, come on, then.

Come on. Yeah.

How long have you been
working with Pat and Mike?

I met them three years ago.

I started out just
doing the shows,

and then I got into the
research program here.

So since then, I've
been splitting my time.

They do research here?

It's not just singing
and dancing?

We do a little
bit of everything.

behavioral research.

I've been concentrating
on communications studies

with Pat and Mike.

- Good girl. Yeah.
- They can really talk?

- [Pat burbling]
- [Joan chuckles]

[dolphins twittering]

[twittering continues]

- Mike and Pat?
- Mm-hmm.

That, believe it or not,

is the sound of a very,
very happy marriage.

They've been
together five years.

They'll die without
each other, I know it.

[twittering continues]

I wonder what we
sound like to them.

Well, that's the key
to our research...

To come up with a happy medium.

You see, we would be able
to communicate with them

if we could develop
a third language

that we both understand.

I could use that now. We'd
crack this case wide open.

I mean, we've got an
eyewitness in Pat, right?

It's too bad she's coming
in like Radio Free Europe.

That's why I wanted
you to hear this.

Excuse me.

Pat's been making the same sound

over and over again
since they took Mike.

It's something different.
I haven't heard it before.

[plays recording]

[Pat crying] Gimme, gimme.

- Gimme, gimme.
- [stops recording]

"Give me"? Give me what?

No. Uh-uh, it's
not that literal.

Unless maybe she's mimicking
something one of them said.

I don't know.

Who else in this area
is working with dolphins?

There's Marine World
outside Los Angeles...

No, no, no. Not shows.

I mean research like yours.

What about universities?

Hmm. There's the
Oceanographic Institute in La Jolla,

but that's only theoretical.

The Navy might be doing
some studies, but I'm not sure.

You know, you can catch
all the wild dolphins you want

between here and Mexico.

Why would anyone
steal a trained one?


- Point Jason.
- Hmm?

They're an independent
research group up the coast.

They offered to buy two
dolphins from us last year.

Who runs it?

Bryant Industries.

Oh, no.

Why? Who's that?

[Janet] A.J., you obviously
didn't read Howard Hughes' will.

- Oh, that kind of a company.
- Mm-hmm.

Yeah, and I want you
to be really careful, too,

because, you know,
this is a think tank

with a lot of dirty water.

Yeah. I remember they, uh...

They did a little landscaping
in Southeast Asia.

Played around with
Vietnam like it was

some eighth
grader's chemistry set.

You know what?

If they are working
with dolphins,

you can bet they're
not just bouncing

brightly colored little balls.

Look, if you have
some free time,

would you mind tiptoeing
through your computer

and see if they've been
washing behind their ears lately?

Who do I work for, huh?

Do I work for you or
do I work for the county?

Well, see, we pay our
taxes, who pays you, right?

- Huh?
- Mm-hmm.

Why is it that some people

cannot resist abusing democracy?

No. Yes. Stop. I'll do it.

Okay? But, you know, around here

it's going to take some
time to get some spare time.

Well, that's all right.
We're in no hurry.

We're going deep sea fishing.

Right. We're doing what?

[A.J.] Hey, what do you
suppose these things are?

[Rick] Eh, it's out there
for weekend sailors.

[A.J.] You should talk.

Changed presidents
since the last time

your boat was in the water.

Well, come on, if you
did some more work on it,

we wouldn't be out a couple
hundred bucks an hour

for renting this tub.



They just launched something.

- [camera shutter clicks]
- It is cylindrical.

It's about 5 to 6 feet long.

However, I do not
think it's a dolphin.

- Maybe it's a pony keg.
- Mmm.

The board of Bryant Industries
reads like a Who's Who

of ex-Cabinet
members, ex-senators.

I mean, we're talking
about a company

that buys small nations.

Why would they
steal one dolphin?

Well, never trust a company

whose motto is "Better
living through death."


Okay, well, maybe a letter
to their public relations...

Let's just stick
around for a minute.

The horse show's
just getting started.

You may have a thing
for underwater demolition,

I do not.

I say it's time to make waves.

Uh, but, however, Richard...

- The sea's free, you know?
- Uh, yeah...

Bryant Industries can pollute the
hell out of it, but they don't own it.

- You know what I mean?
- Uh, yes...

We're just a couple
of American sportsmen

out here enjoying the
sea, the surf, the oil spills.

You know what I mean?

Yeah, that's right.
That's... That's right.

If you think I'm afraid of those
bubble-brained frog men out here

plunking their magic twangers, you
got another think coming, you know?

I mean, what's the worst they
could do, have us for lunch?

Small fry like you
aren't even keepers.

What do you think, A.J.?

I think if we keep
our eye on the ball,

we'd go two for three today.

Oh, I don't know.
We might get lucky.

We might hit the long one.

You want to commit
suicide? Just start throwing.

[Man over P.A.]
This is the U.S. Navy.

Throw down your
weapons immediately

and shut off all engines.

Does this mean
we're safe or out?

I believed you
more as fishermen.

You've got to be kidding
me with all these cards.

Hey, don't look at
me. That's state law.

Bureau of Consumer Affairs?

What are you selling, brushes?

Go ahead and laugh.
You may need us someday.

Yeah. Send me your number
when you get to Leavenworth.

I always knew there
was a difference

between working in
intelligence and working with it.



Okay, you're clean.

Not real bright, but clean.

Now hear this, gentlemen.

You're going to
forget everything

you've seen and heard today.

You're going to forget
that Bryant Industries

is a subcontractor
for the U.S. Navy.

You never heard they're doing
classified weapons research,

and you never endured
the pleasure of our company

for the last five hours.

Is that clear?


As long as you'll agree that
we were never falsely imprisoned

or denied our
constitutional rights.

I don't believe this guy.

Hey, I don't
believe him, either.

How'd you like to
disappear for a few years?


Oh, we've got our
minds right, boss.

Right, A.J.?

Now let me tell you
something you can remember.

We like dolphins, too,

which is why we ordered Bryant

to phase them out of
their research last year.

And we don't know anything
about the SeaWorld incident.

I don't supposed
you'd care to tell us

who was working with the
dolphins back then, would you?

[mouths word]

He'll take you back
out to your boat now.

- Thank you.
- Don't thank me.

Thank that lady in the
D.A.'s office you had me call.

Hey, by the way, is she single?

Don't know who
you're talking about.

Hey, now, personally,
I would love to tell you,

but you and I have
never met, right?

That boat better
be just as we left it.


Hey, don't look at me.

I work with Bryant Industries,
not with those Navy jocks.

Sorry to hear they gave
you such a rough time.

Ah, don't worry about
it. You know the Navy.

It's not just a job.

Everything's got to be
a damned adventure.

Yeah, I know what you mean.

Hey, you're the guys who are
looking for that dolphin, aren't you?

Yeah, we are.

♪♪ [piano]

Do you know that I've had dates

with five different
men this month?

And you've got them
all beat by a mile.

[Myron] Well, I should hope so.

With all the deadbeats that
have been hitting on you.

If it's not those pimply
crew-cuts from your office,

it's those two banana-necks
who stood us up here tonight.

Daddy, those banana-necks
are picking up our tab tonight.

Hmm. Well, that's
got to be some favor.

The last time they
took me to dinner,

we stayed in a car and
ordered from a plastic clown.

But, uh...

I'm glad it, uh, gave us
an excuse to get together.

Oh, you're beautiful tonight.

The candlelight in your
hair... It, uh, reminds me of...

Please don't.

- Hello.
- Hi, guys.

See? I told you they'd make it.

- Yeah.
- Hi.

We've been waiting long enough

for this guy to have walked
all the way from Maine.


[A.J.] Poor little guy
didn't stand a chance.

Oh, what about that
marina behind SeaWorld?

We canvassed every boat on her.

Nobody saw a thing
the night Mike was taken.

Well, except for the old
lady who was captured

and given a physical
by the alien starship.

It's true.

Did you check the militant
Save the Whales group?

They're always threatening
to release animals in captivity.

Yeah, but they're up in the Bering
Strait ramming Russian trollers.

And after that, they're
booked into the baby seal hunt.

Okay, okay. Look.

I don't mind singing
for my supper,

but you tin-ears better
listen to the lyrics.

You're talking tuna

when you ought to be
out hunting barracuda.

I mean, the snatch was
first cabin all the way.

Major league commando time.

So who runs in that pack?

Navy SEALs?

Underwater demolition experts?

Salvage divers?

As Jacques Cousteau would
say, "Suddenly, it was morning."

So why don't you blow some
bubbles in the right faces

and see who comes up for air?

Uh, well, as a matter
of fact, we were thinking,

if you weren't too
busy this week,

you might talk to
some of your friends

in the import/export business.

You know, those guys
who aren't too fussy

about little details
like customs...

Kind of tied up.

Oh, like hell you are.

Del Mar closed last week

and Santa Anita
doesn't open for a month.

Right. Just enough
time to work the kinks

out of my back swing.

35 a day and 20 cents a mile.

Of course, my putting's
been off a little lately, too.

40 and 20, that's all she wrote.

Make it 50, 50,

and we'll toss in
a list of everyone

who ever worked with
dolphins at Point Jason.

- Deal.
- Uh, wait a minute.

That's classified information.

How are you going to get
your lovely little mitts on that?

I always protect my sources.

Um, by the way,
was that Navy officer

I talked to on the phone as
good-looking as he sounded?


[Gibson] That's the last tape.

I got it synthesized for
3,500 cycles a second.

If he doesn't go for
this, we are in trouble.

Get in there.

Turn it on.

[dolphin chittering]

Damn, I've never
seen one as stubborn.

You know, maybe
we ought to call Merritt

and push this whole thing back.

It's too late.

He got the green
light this morning.

We got two days
to break this sucker.

We just have to out-psyche him.

And what about
those investigators?

They already got
as far as Jason.

If they go back and look
at our work with dolphins...

It's all classified information.

Besides, the Navy doesn't
know anything about this.

Those guys are up
against a dead end.

Well, so are we.

This lover boy's so
homesick he won't even eat.


I think I know what
might perk up his appetite.

[A.J.] Are you sure
this guy's reliable?

[Rick] Are you kidding? He's
a one-man Wild Kingdom.

[A.J.] He looks more like
an endangered specie to me.

[Rick] Hey, Gary.
How's it going?

Hey, my man.

Working out of the wagon
keeps my overhead down.

[animal growling]

Sort of Detroit's answer
to Noah's Ark, huh?

Yeah. That's good, man.

- I like that.
- Thank you.

But listen, we got
to keep it down

because I got a load of
Nicaraguan parrots in there

zonked out on tequila.

They just flew in.

- How'd they find their way?
- Nah, man.

I picked them up at Air Freight.

They were stashed
in a load of straw hats.

You see, these guys
fly without passports.

- Follow me?
- Uh, yeah.

But look, I asked
you about seafood.

You got any dolphin
running this week?

Uh, I wouldn't mess with him.

- Huh? Why?
- He's on a hunger strike.


All right, I asked around,

and this ain't your
day for mahi mahi.

The only thing on
the market is wild.

No Ed Sullivan time, if
that's what you're looking for.

- Yeah.
- Well, what about
private collectors?

Are you crazy? Ocelots
and cheetahs, yeah.

Hey, I even unloaded
a monitor lizard...

- [parrot squawks]
- for a doctor
up in Cerritos.

But nobody collects dolphins.

Hmm. Okay, thanks a lot, Gary.

You let us know if you
hear anything, okay?

- Hey, Ricky.
- Mm-hmm?

I can get you a good
price on a Komodo dragon.

No, thanks.

I hear they're hell
to housebreak.

Yeah, but they sure
discourage burglars.

Right. See you around, Gare.

- [parrot squawks]
- I think he's wrong.

- About the dragon?
- No, about private parties.

I mean, sure, a dolphin
is an expensive house pet.

It's a little bit
more maintenance

than a cat box and
a flea collar, but...

Yeah. So we ought to
start looking for somebody

with a lot of bread and water.

Best stuff.

Okay, we need to know

everything that a
dolphin would need

to keep himself comfortable
outside of this environment.

You know, things like the
kind of holding tanks and pens,

the amount of water,
percentage of salt,

feeding schedules,
things like that.

All right. We'll
talk after the show.

How's Pat holding up?

She's fading.

No appetite, no sleep.

That's why I'm
working her in the show.

I've got to get
her mind off Mike.

[Announcer over P.A.]
Susie and Courtney!

[cheering, applause]

Let's go, Pat!

The show must go on.


Yeah, break a fin, Pat.


And now, here to thrill you

with their great
acrobatic ability,

super-intelligence, and
mischievous sense of humor,

ladies and gentlemen,

we're proud to introduce to you

our Dolphins in Harmony!

[cheering, applause]

And here they are!




And Dolly!

As you'll see in just a minute,

these guys like to sail.

They do it on the
water, and... [cheering]

they do it in the air.

Look at them go with
the greatest of ease.

I swear, they spend more time

in the air than in the water.

And now, folks, we're
in for a special treat.

I'd like you to meet one of
the great ladies of SeaWorld,

our prima ballerina...


And with her,
another favorite lady...

- Can you wave to the audience?
- [whistling]

Good girl! Come here.

How about doing
a pirouette, Pat?

Okay. Can you do a pirouette?

[Pat whistling]

Good girl!

Good girl!

Martha Koloski,
eat your heart out.

Next, she'll be
ready for Swan Lake.

Or maybe she already is.

It's a nice day for a stroll...

[Pat] Gimme, gimme, gimme!

Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme!

- Come here.
- [whimpers]

- Gimme!
- [crowd murmuring]

Gimme, gimme,
gimme, gimme, gimme!

Pat? Uh, Pat?

Yoo-hoo, Pat?

Well, folks, I guess Pat...

Another smile.
Hold it real tight.

- Hold still.
- A.J.?

That's it, girls.

- Hey, what are you doing?
- Just stay there!

Now look, we work
for the park here.

It's an emergency. You'll
get your camera back.

We'll pay for the
film and everything.

- It's a $1,200 camera.
- I know that.

[Man] Don't drop
it in the water.

And let me tell you,
after our show here,

you folks will probably
want to get over

and find a good seat for Shamu.

Gimme! Gimme, gimme!

Come here. Come here, Pat.

[shutter clicking]

Now, moving right along...

- What's wrong, Pat?
- [whistling]

What's wrong?

Something in that
crowd spooked her.

She's really trying
to tell us, too.

Yeah, well, maybe she did.

After all, one picture is
worth a thousand whistles.

- Yeah.
- Are you crazy?

- Hey, hey.
- Give me that camera.

Give me that roll of film.

No. I'll tell you what.

Here you go.

You send me your
name and address,

and I will send you
the prints, okay?

There you go. Just
send it to that address.

- Have a good day now.
- Thank you.

- Wait...
- Bye-bye.

I got Shamu kissing the kids.

We'll send you enlargements.

- 11 by 14. You'll like it.
- Real big ones.

Put them up on
the living room wall.

They'll love it.

Your decorator must
be a very lonely person.

I prefer those surfing posters
you used to hang in your room.

Come on, Mom,
you've got to admit

it says at least as
much as the Oldenburg

that's hanging in
your condo lobby.

It says you shouldn't
be living alone,

or with your brother.

Well, I agree with you there.

How about a shooter, Mom?

I got some margarita
mix out in the boat.

Ooh, no, thanks, honey.

I'm on a salt-free
diet this month.

Besides, you have work to do.

I know you're playing

"what is wrong
with this picture?"

I left a new chew
toy for Marlowe

on the kitchen counter.

[Rick] Thanks,
Mom. See you later.

Thanks, honey.

I'll return this
after the weekend.

Oh, no hurry.

After all, it's yours.

[door closes]

A.J., get in here quick.

Look at this picture.

You're right!

It hasn't moved in two hours!

All right, look.

These two kids here,

they belong with
these folks, right?

- Mm-hmm.
- All right.

Ma and Pa Suburbia here,
they belong with Freckles

who's sticking cotton
candy in his sister's hair.

- Mm-hmm.
- High school lovers up here.

- Mm-hmm.
- Okay.

A whole den of Cub
Scouts right here, right?

What is this barracuda doing

in the middle of
all those goldfish?

Well, he's... Mm-hmm.

Lookit here.

[A.J.] Well, from the
angle of her head,

it looks like Pat's
looking right at him.


Gibby, Gibby, Gibby?

I think we're talking
the same language,

and this time, she's
coming in loud and clear.

[Announcer, on
tape] And now, folks,

we're in for a special treat.

I'd like you to meet one of
the great ladies of SeaWorld,

our prima ballerina...


Now that's more like it!

Okay, I'm going to test
the retrieval harness

and we'll check it out again.

We're bringing him
home in the morning.

You on schedule?

Well, don't worry.

The boy will be
there to meet you.


Right. Okay. Have a safe sail.

[Man] Hey, Gibson,
take a look at this.

We got a break-through here.

Mike's going through the
whole routine like clockwork.

[Gibson chuckles]
What did I tell you?

All it took was a little chatter

from his girlfriend and
the sounds of home.

[Man] Yeah, yeah.

But will it work when we
get out there in the open sea?


We crank up those
underwater speakers,

and that's the only
sound he'll be hearing.

He goes to the drop point,
picks up the little package,

he comes right back.


I knew he was going
to be an all-star.

Best dolphin I ever worked with.

Look, uh, when
this operation's over,

I'd like to take...

No. It's got to be
airtight. No evidence.


[Pat whistling]

Pat, they'll find Mike.

You've got to believe me.

Everything is going to
be all right, I promise.

Come here, baby.

It's all going to be fine.

[Janet] And you're telling me

that a dolphin picked this
guy out of an entire crowd,

remembering him
from a kidnapping?

A little thin, guys.

Aw, come on, Janet,
anything's possible.

We're talking about
alien intelligence here.

Yours or the dolphin's?

This is an entire list of
everyone at Point Jason

who had access to or
worked with dolphins,

and that includes
Navy and civilian.


Must have been some
Naval engagement.

You're not kidding.

I spent the entire evening

trying to keep all
hands on deck.

♪♪ [rock]

Rick, you're my brother.

Nine times out
of ten I trust you.

This is definitely a number ten.

I'm not going in there.

[Rick] Hey, look,
without this shortcut,

we could be crossing
names off of this list

into the next century.

Now don't worry,
somebody in here

will be able to identify him.

[A.J. sighs]

Besides, you'll love
it. I'll tell you what.

When you get in there,
if you get a chance,

check out the men's room.

It'd bring tears to
Hugh Hefner's eyes.

Just tell Mom to keep
it simple, all right?

Closed casket, a few friends,

no flowers, donations
to my favorite charities,

which, by the way,
does not include

The Big Brothers of America.

Look, give me at
least half an hour

before you come
in there, all right?

Trust me.


[scattered applause]

To tall ships and taller women.


Call me Ishmael.

Another 50?


What can I get you, buddy?

Uh, beer, please.

Thank you.

Last two left-handed.

Time to abandon ship, Otto.

[cheering, applause]

Uh, now, you asked
me to play, remember?

Now I know I
rubbed it in a little bit,

but no hard feelings, okay?

O-Otto. Otto.


No hard feelings?

Anybody beats
Otto is great player.

Vodka, please.

Two glasses.

[Rick laughing]

We were salvaging this
wreck off of the cape, right?

And we're right in the middle

of this blue streak
force 10 gale.

Keep your money in your pocket.

I'm taking care of this.

Here you go, partner.

You keep the change, all right?

Thank you, buddy.

Now, let's see. Where was I?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Anyhow, I'm
downstairs playing tag

with a bunch of great whites,

and we're looking for
this little Greek beauty,

went down with all
hands back in '35.

Well, we spot her.

She's just nestled down there,

sleeping in a ton of
mud and barnacles, right?

[clears throat]

[Rick] Me and this other fellow,

a little Colombian
dude named Jesus...

- I'd like another beer.
- Sure.

And if you can come
up with a chaser,

you can keep the change.

[Rick] Who knows what's
going to come flying out...

You want some information,
buddy, go to the public library.

[Rick] We're looking
over our shoulders,

which does a lot of good

because it's just black
as night down there.

Anyway, we finally
spot the purser's office.

Now it's all beginning
to look worthwhile

because there's the
safe just sitting there

like Sleeping Beauty, right?

So I go over and
I start the torch.

Now, Jesus, meanwhile,
is over there behind me

crossing himself like
it's All Saints' Day.

Anyhow, I can smell
the gold in there.

Finally, I get the
lid off of that thing.

And what do you think
is staring me in the face?

- What?
- A moray eel

about the size of
Arnold Schwarzenegger,

and he's just grinning
from ear to ear.


Big and tough.

What are you looking
at, sweetheart?

That was a highly
diverting story.

- Highly diverting story.
- That's right.

Couldn't help but overhearing.
You're a diver, are you?

No, no, no, no. I'm
with the water ballet.


Well, I'm fishing for a name.

And if you can come up
with the catch of the day,

there's a hundred in it for you.

You got a fishing license?

I certainly do.

Nautilus Maritime Insurance.

I'm investigating a
little salvage fraud.


Well, I'll tell you what, buddy.

You keep looking for this
guy, and you're going to wind up

with a one-way ticket
to the Bermuda Triangle.


I think you know him.

- Name your price.
- Okay.


Leaving! Leaving! Okay!


- [blows landing]
- [A.J. groaning]




That was just swell.


Hey, this one's
on Gibson, buddy.

Yeah, yeah. Gibby and
I go back a long way.

Say, I haven't seen
him in, oh, over a year.

He still working for the
Navy up there at Point Jason?

No. The last I heard
he was working

for Merritt Salvage
on Harbor Island.

Yeah, yeah. That's
right, Merritt Salvage.

Eh, old Gibson, he's
one hell of a diver,

I'll tell you that.

Saved my wetsuit once
working this Dutch freighter

off of the coast of New Guinea.

I'll tell you what.

You run into him, you tell
him The Torch said hello.

Sure will, buddy.

All right, guys,
I'm shovin' off.

- See you later.
- Take care of yourself.



It's Ernie.

Hey, you never did any diving
off of New Guinea, did you?

I have a good boy,
and I have a bad boy.

Which one do you want first?



Gibson is your good boy.

He's a decorated war
veteran, ex-Navy frogman,

honorable discharge in 1977,

and he worked as a
consultant to Bryant Industries

as dolphin trainer until 1981.

At that time he sort
of fell off the map.

On to Merritt.

Okay, Merritt is the
one playing dirty pool.

He slipped right through the
drug enforcement nets last year.

Seems like one
of his salvage tubs

was caught returning
from a job in the Caribbean.

It was carrying a half ton
of Colombian greenery.

Anyway, he said he
knew nothing about it, so...

- Oh, of course not.
- So he skated.

[Marlowe barking]

Marlowe. Marlowe,
come back here.

Now, Marlowe, if you
go for another swim,

so help me... [ticking]


Oh, somebody's going to be mad.


And I've got a feeling
it's going to be us.

A.J., hit the deck!

Down! Let's go!
Down! Down! Down!


[ticking stops]


There you go, Marlowe.

Any time you want
to go swimming,

you just let me know, okay?

Now, you manufactured it.
We want to know who bought it.

Look, fella, I got someone from the
D.A.'s office sitting with me right now.

Do you want to talk to me
or do you want a court order?


It's lot number 721,
serial number 732488.

40 percent nitro?

How powerful is that?

Half a city block?


Here you go, Marlowe.

One on the house, now
that we've got one left.

Three cases?

Okay, go.


One to Keogh in Wilmington.

One to B & R in La Jolla.

And one to... Wait.
Hold on, hold on.

What was the last one again?

One to Merritt
Salvage, Harbor Island.

The main house is dead.

There's bound to
be a guest cottage,

servants' quarters,
or something.

Yeah, a piece of cake.

They said Merritt's in
Ensenada till after the weekend.

[A.J.] Doesn't this strike you

as an awfully elaborate spread
for a man who deals in junk?

Depends on the junk.

[both grunting]

[water sloshing]

Boy, that's all we need...
Somebody skinny dipping.

Well, if it's a
butler, I'll be upset.

On the other
hand, if it's a maid...


[whistling continues]

[whistling continues]

[Gibson] Get him
in closer over here.

We'll take him out on this side.

[Man #1] Come on, Mike.

Over here. Come on, come on.

[Gibson] All right, bring
it... carry it to the edge.

- Now let him swim into it.
- Food for Mikey.

- That's it, that's it.
- Up a little.

- Easy boy.
- Watch that side now.

Easy, easy.

[Gibson] All right,
grab the other side.

Get him up.

Roll him slightly.

- Good, Mike.
- [Mike whistling]

- Okay, that's got it.
- Okay.

[Man #2] Going
for a little swim now.

[Gibson] I got him.

[Man #2] Okay,
you're going in, baby.

[Mike whistling]

[starts engine]

[Gibson] Okay, easy, buddy.

Okay, everybody, together now.

All right? Lift him up.

Watch it, watch it.
He's slipping. Oh!

Slide him this way. Come on.

We've got to get
him into the water.

Okay, hit it.

Hi. Now where's the dolphin?

It's too late.

It's already begun its mission.


♪♪ [instrumental]

[Announcer over P.A.]
How about those dolphins?

They put on quite a show.

And now, ladies and gentlemen,

strutting his stuff,
it's Avalon the Whale!


Sweetheart, you've got to eat.

Just try. Won't you,
honey? Please?

All right. Just give up, then.

And Mike's out there
somewhere headed into the Pacific

with a half million
dollars of cocaine

wrapped around his nose.

Did the police
find all of the men?

No. Only Gibson and
Connell for the kidnapping.

Merritt's the big fish,

and it looks like
he might get away.

They can't prove that he made
the drop for Mike to retrieve.

He's got the evidence.

You know what?

I bet they never
really did train him.

He was just playing along,

waiting for his
chance for freedom.

- [whimpers]
- [sighs]

Maybe we ought to let her go.

Well, we've been out with
the Coast Guard since dawn.

Swept the whole area
with boats, helicopters...



Hiya, Pat. Yeah.

- [Pat whistling]
- Yeah.

I don't know if we're ever going

to be able to talk to you.

But if we do, I
wouldn't blame you a bit

if you didn't understand us.

In your world nobody
steals or goes to war,

kills just for the hell of it.

Yeah, you live in
innocence and peace.

The only thing you
have to fear is us.

That's my Pat. Yes.

- Yes.
- [whistling]

What did you say to her?

Don't know.

There's something coming in.

Where? I don't see anything.

She sure does.

[laughs] It's Mike.

I'm going to go
open up the gate.

He's come back!

Come here, Mike!

Come here, boy!

- Whoa!
- Wow!

[gasps] Hi, sweetheart! Hi!

We missed you. Yeah.

[Mike whistling]

There you go.

Well, well, well.

Might be a little
profit in this.



Closed-Captioned By J.R.
Media Services, Inc. Burbank, CA