Search Party (2016–…): Season 3, Episode 2 - The Rookie Lawyer - full transcript

Last night, commotion erupted
during a celebration

for Senator-elect Mary Ferguson
after her landslide win.

It happened as one of
the campaign staff members

was escorted from the party
in handcuffs.

The woman in question,
Dory Sief,

and her boyfriend,
Drew Gardner...

-Oh, my God, what?
-...are expected to be charged

with the murder
of Keith Powell,

a private investigator
and loving father.

If you're wondering
why the suspect, Dory Sief,

is smiling in her mug shot,
you're not alone.



It's like, why are you smiling
like that unless you did it?

She just looks snotty.

Man: I just know.
I can tell.

[ Groaning ]
She didn't do it.
She couldn't have.

I'm a doctor,
and people with freckles

are pretty tame and sensitive.

What does this mean for me?

[ Groans ]

♪ Obedear, the sky is low ♪

♪ Watch fluent seamen
rig their rudders so the... ♪

[ Indistinct conversations ]

Gardner.

You made bail.

[ Keys jingle ]



Well, it was nice
talking to you.

Recognizable Voice: ...don't
have a last name there...
Oh, my God.

...and Portia Davenport to
bury the body in the woods...

Oh, look.

Wait, she is like,
involved in this.

Oh, my God.
-[ Laughs ]

Shh, shh, shh!

What are
you guys watching?

-Nothing.
-Nothing.

Steph: Put it away.
Put it away.

You guys,
I just heard my name.

Gloria: Okay, we're not, like,
obsessed with you.

We just got a Google alert
about the play...

-Oh, yeah?
-...and this came up,

and I guess
you're, like, a killer?

What?
Let me see that.

Um, so, it's been brought
to my attention

that at a clique of friends
in their late 20s

murdered private investigator
Keith Powell

in Montreal, Canada.

To my understanding, Dory Sief
and her boyfriend, Drew --

and, I'm sorry, I don't have
a last name -- murdered the man

and enlisted the assistance
of their dear friends Elliot --

also don't have
a last name there --

and Portia Davenport
to bury the body in the woods.

Oh, my God.
Who did this?

Apparently, there maybe have
been some sexual foreplay...
Who did this?
How did this happen?

♪♪

♪♪

Marion: Did Danny say whether
his grandmother

has a formal Thanksgiving?

I don't know.

There are a lot of kids,
but she lives in the Fab 40s.

Oh, well, your dad and I
went to a dinner party once

in that neighborhood.
The CEO of ISE...

Hey, newbie.

It's okay.

Come on.

...rich people
Thanksgiving.

I think it's such a shame
that you're spending your last

Thanksgiving with family
you've never met instead of us.

Wait,
when is the Lady Bird

gonna get her
special powers already?

It's not about
a superhero.

It's about
Lady Bird Johnson.

Idiots.
-It's insane.

I-I think she's only like
the second female director

to be nominated for an Oscar
in, like, 10 years.

What did you just say?

What?
Nothing.

Just that it's weird
that she's only

the second female director --
-That's not what you said.

You said it was insane!

You think that's insane?!

No, no.
I'm sorry.

I-I agree with whatever
you're saying.

What's insane is that my foot
hurts and no one believes me!

[ Yelps ]

[ Whistle blows ]

-Castillo!
-Off me!

How many TVs you gonna
break this week?

[ Yelps ]
I'm gonna
kill you in your sleep

for what you said
about the movie!

Sief.
You got a visitor.

Recognizable Voice:
Apparently there may have
been some sexual foreplay

during the wrathful act
as an exercise in sadism,

and then that's pretty much
all I know,

but I hope I did the right
thing by calling this in.

[ Door opens ]

Meg: Hey, everybody!
I got waffles!

They didn't travel well,
so let's eat them now.

Elijah: Oh, waffles!

You're the best, Meg!

You're my best friend!

Oh, my God.

Meg.
It's you.

Elijah, you told?

What?
I just woke up.

I asked you if you told anybody,
and you said you didn't.

I said I told nobody.

And Meg is nobody.

I tell Meg everything.
She doesn't matter.

She's just a receptacle.

Portia,
Elijah's right.

I -- I --
I'm no one.

I'm pure trash.

I'm -- I'm --
I'm -- I'm a big loser.

I felt like I had to do
the right thing.

I'm so sorry.
-I trusted you.

Meg,
why did you have to say

we did weird sex stuff
to the body?!

You told me they did
weird sex stuff to the body!

You said you did weird sex stuff
to the body.

I would never do weird sex stuff
to a body!

I feel certain
you said that!

And where are you going?!

Oh, my goodness,
I'm sorry.

Elliott: Portia!

What?!

-Get in!
-What?

Okay.

Elliot, whose van is this?
-It's mine.

I use it to transport
all my water bottles,

and then the owner died,
and no one asked for it back.

Well,
where are we going?

Drew's been arrested,
and we're next.
What?!

I know a place far, far away
from all of this.

Our own imaginations?

The Hamptons.

My stupid seat belt's
not working!

Look, our names are out there,
the cops are after us,

we got to get going,
so just deal with it!

Okay!

Happy Monday.

[ Indistinct conversations ]

Thank God that weekend's over,
huh?

Excuse me, everyone.

I am sorry to interrupt
your important work.

I see there's a cake on my desk.

I think I made it clear
to everybody at this office

that I-I don't like gifts
or surprises or attention

that I didn't
professionally earn.

So, if it isn't removed
in the next hour,

it's going in the trash.

All right?

Hey.
Sorry about that.

It's from that sweet old lady
who does the billing for us.

Ugh, she would.

Happy birthday,
by the way.

Why?

I don't know.
I don't know.

My point.

Anyway,
look at these jackasses.

-Mm-hmm. Yeah.
-Huh, see?

It's everything I hate
about young people --

rich,
beautiful, corrupt.

What do they call them,
millellials?

Millennials.

This could be good for us,
though, right?

You know.
-How do you mean?

It's a good angle.

Good angle --
people love to hate them.

It's like a national obsession.
-I don't know.

I don't think people really care
about millennials anymore.

I feel like that kind of talk
has died down, actually.

Oh, really?
Oh, really?

Don't tell me
about the world, Garrett.

If I wanted that,
I would've hired a travel agent.

Just go out there.

Tell everybody I'm gonna
make a statement to the press.

There's already so much
on this already.

It's just...

We can get ahead of it,
though.

Yeah, we can.
That's right.

Put my face out there.
-Sure.

Let them know
what they're up against.

Copy that.

Okay.

Guilty, guilty,
guilty little frogs.

Hi!

No, you have to
pick up the phone, Gail.

The phone.

Yeah. Hi.
-Hi.

Dory, look at you
in that cute prison jumpsuit.

I can't believe this is so real!
-I know.

Thank you so much
for coming, Gail.

-Of course.
-Yeah, it means a lot to me.

Okay, so, as you know,
I don't have any money

because Sundeep
turned the banks against me,

but I figured something out
because I'm a genius.

My friends Tim and Margie said
they'll bail you out.

Wow, amazing!
Oh, my God.

Wow, that --
that's so generous.

There is one catch, though.

It's a good catch.
-Okay.

They said they'll only
put up the money

if you hire their daughter
Cassidy to represent you,

which is a great thing,
right,

because now you'll get a free
lawyer out of the whole deal.

Well, I don't know.
Like, isn't --

Isn't that illegal?

Is it?

Why would she want to be
my lawyer for free anyways?

Dory,
are you kidding me?

You're famous.

What? Why?

Why?
Um, only because your arrest

was the most epic,
fabulous public arrest ever.

Dory,
this is your destiny.

Wait, Elliott,
I'm so confused.

Is this, like, your house?
-No, no, no.

It's a timeshare that belongs
to this older man

who I used to let spoon me
for Broadway box seats,

and then ironically he fell
out of one of the box seats,

and he's been in a coma
for over a year,

so he definitely
won't be here.

Oh, my gosh,
it's so pretty!

Yeah, we love it.

Cassidy:
Mommy, stop.

No, Mommy, I like it.

Oh, my God, Mom, Mom,
she's coming.

I'm hanging up.
Hanging up.

Dory Sief,
Cassidy Diamond,

and it's an honor
to call myself your lawyer.

Hi.
It's so nice to meet you.

Thanks for getting me
out of here.

Yeah, wow.
That's an incredible handshake.

It's firm.

Uh, I'm sorry,
but how old are you?

30 and single.

Oh.
Okay, so, how do we start?

Well, the trees have ears,
so we don't talk here.

So, I rented us
this luxury SUV.

Figured you wanted a touch
of glamour after a hard night.

Oh, that's nice.

Do you do that
for all your clients?

I plan to.
You're my first case.

Your first case?

I know, so exciting.

Congratulations.

Ugh, I feel like it's such
a blessing to be born blonde,

and now I just look like
an evil brunette.

Well, that's exactly
what we want.

Nobody can recognize us.

Oh, good,
you're the babysitters?

Yeah.

Well, they were smart
to hire two,

because I think the last one
was complaining

about how messy they were.

I'm sure
they're lovely.

Well, look.

They're gonna be here in,
like, two seconds,

and Dickie doesn't like it
when I drink around the kids,

so if you could just
take them jet skiing,

uh,
build a little...

snowman...
-Absolutely.

We'll figure something out.
-We will.

We were just thinking about
hunting for hermit crabs.

Ew.

Okay, well, clean up the tar
when you're gone.

You got it.

Oh!

Oh, my God.

Cassidy: Five-star sushi
for a five-star client.

I just want to let you know,
like, where my head's at.

I took a look
at the evidence.

It does not look good.

Mm.

I can explain what happened --
-No, no, no, no.

Okay?
That's not why I said that.

All right?

The less you tell me now,
the better ground

we're on when we're building
our defense, okay?

'Cause I can't, like, un-know
whatever you tell me, right?

-Right.
-Okay, so, let's talk options.

Option number one --
plea deal.

Okay,
so how does that work?

You plead guilty,
get a lighter sentence.

It's easy, it's fun,
you skip the court part,

you just sign this paper
admitting to taking

full responsibility
for killing Keith.

No, no,
I'm not signing anything --

No, no, no, no!

Option two --
self-defense.

This is a very attractive option
in my personal opinion.

It's sexy.

Keith attacked you
and your boyfriend, right?

Did you know he put
a tracking device on your phone?

Yeah. That's how he found
you guys in Montreal.

He was a total creep.

So you had to defend yourself,
right?

I believe it,
and so will a jury.

But...

I'm kind of feeling option
number three --

pleading insanity.

Insanity?

Mental illness
is a real thing

that everyone has
or wishes they had.

If you've ever been under, like,
a large amount of stress

or heard voices
or had an imaginary friend,

it's a totally
viable argument...

♪♪

So, what do you think?
Does that sound good?

No, I don't --
I don't want to do that one.

Okay.

I was just, like,
telling you you had options.

That's all.

There you go.

Make sure everyone knows
Chicagoans give big tips.

-Give me the phone back.
-Delete the picture.

Delete the picture.
-Give me your password.

Give me your password
or your finger.

Give me the...

Aaron: Stop it!
Stop it!

I can't believe how much
they charge for a room,

and there's
no hair dryer.

Frank: Aaron, help your mother
find a hair dryer.

I can't!
Reid won't give back my phone!

Aaron took a pic of me
on the plane sleeping,

and I look like an idiot.
He's gonna post it!

So let me delete it,
then.

Would you all
just shut up?

Please!

Do we always have to scream
at each other all the time?!

Dude, you shouldn't
get so upset.

It makes you
look like a killer.

Kathy: Do not play with your
brother's feelings like that!

We all know
he didn't do it.

We know he's absolutely
innocent, right, Drew?

-Drew!
-Oh, my God!

He did it!
-No, stop! Stop!

He's just in shock,
understandably.

You asked him if he was
innocent, and he just shrugged.

Reid,
shut your damn mouth.

You have no idea what it would
be like to be in his situation,

being accused
of something you didn't do,

so stop
making everything worse

and just shut up
or get out of here.

You got it?

Frank:
Gang, we got good news.

The one and only Bob Lunch
is gonna save the day.

The Chicago Tribunecalled him
the best defense attorney

on the east side
of Chicago in 1988,

and I guarantee you
he's sharper than he ever was.

This is fantastic!
-Fantastic.

That's great, Dad.

Drew, it'll be okay.

It's all just
a misunderstanding.

America has the best
justice system in the world.

They don't put
innocent people in jail.

Oh, Chantal!

We grieved for you!

We were praying
you weren't dead,

and you were just
taking it easy in Canada?

So you were never
in New Hampshire

hiding out inside
one of your poems?

And now you're wrapped up
in some murder?!

No, I do not understand
what that's about.

That's, like, a mix-up.

Well, you better
figure that out, young lady,

because your father
is beside himself.

He -- He was too upset
to even come here.

With Robert away, it's evident
that I must fill in

as the lead patriarch
in this family,

and I think that we could all
thrive under my guidance,

considering I am a marriage
and family therapist.

-Ted, please.
-Now's the time.

Let me lead.

I hate to say it, but I wish
that you had been abused,

because when people thought
that you had been abused,

they felt bad for me.
-Oh, my God.

I hope you are ready to return
every cent of that $250,000.

You still have the money,
right, Chantal?

Well, no, I don't.

I spent it.

You spent all of it?!

Shut your dumb mouth,
Katherine.

You know what?
Just stop yelling at me.

I'm gonna make the money back,
okay?

-How?
-I'm starting a business.

Um, what business?

I don't know.

I just know that I'm starting
a business, and...

it'll involve P.R.,
and there's gonna be an app.

And I'm paying everybody back,
and it's gonna redeem me,

and Daddy's gonna be
very proud, okay?

Okay?!

I'd like us all to look
at our hands and imagine

that each finger is a value this
family was once founded upon.

So, what family value
would our thumbs be?

I don't
love you anymore!

[ Crying ]

Thank you all for coming.

Thank you, everyone.
Hi, Kathy.

Uh, okay.

Uh, I'm here to announce

that the United States
Attorney's office

has filed criminal charges
against Dory Sief, okay,

and Drew Gardner
for the recent murder

of a New York City P.I.

They have been charged

with first-degree murder
of Keith Powell.

On May 26th, Keith Powell,

private investigator, father,

and lover of Ms. Sief,

drove to Montreal
in an effort

to retrieve
the missing individual.

When he arrived
at the r-residence,

uh, he was, uh...

[ Softly ]
What -- What're you doing?

[ Normal voice ]
Get out of here.

Uh, when he arrived in --
I'm sorry, where was I?

Yes. Uh, when Mr. Powell arrived
in the residence...

So,
all we have to do now

is just wait for the prosecution
to make the first move,

and then we, like, build
our defense based on that,

but the key to all of this

is that you say nothing
to no one ever.

[ Cellphone chimes ]

Oh, my God, my mom
just texted me.

The prosecutor threw a press
conference about the charges.

What?

Um, driver,
can you put on 1010 WINS?

Polly: The biggest challenge
of this case

is just gonna be
sifting through

the mountains of evidence.

[ Chuckling]Okay, so...

Jokes aside, Dory Sief
and Drew Gardner

will pay
for these immoral acts.

You know what?
Turn that off.

You know, that's Federal
Prosecutor Polly Danziger

in a nutshell.

All bravado,
no humanity.

She's such a bull, which is,
like, fine for me,

'cause I am, too,
but, like, God.

I just feel bad for her
sometimes.

She grew up in a generation
that was all like,

"You got to be a man
to get ahead."

It's like, "Bitch, just admit
you like to shop."

So, tell me.

As a man.

Did I look attractive
out there or what?

Polly,
we have a weird, uh...

issue.

What's up?

Who the hell
is "Fat Frankie"?

I was trying to tell you this
during the press conference,

but according
to this police officer,

Joy Hartman,
this guy, Fat Frankie,

confessed
to murdering Keith.

No.

No!

No, Garrett, no!

I just gave a speech
out there!

I know.

I can't take it back!

Why didn't you give me
this before?

M--
It was just presented to me!

This is not my fault.

I want it to be!

[ Kids screaming ]

Hey.
Okay.

God,
what are we doing?

I know.
I know.

So, maybe I should've had more
of a plan this morning

than just get out of town.
I was being reactionary, okay?

We know that now!

God, I just hate
these rich kids.

They don't listen to us
at all.

Hey, guys?

Guys,
remember what we said!

You're connected to us
by a 10-foot invisible rope.

You cannot go farther
than the rope!

Portia:
Hello? Guys!

My God.

You know, let 'em go,
honestly.

Cassidy: Oh, my God.

It looks like someone
tipped off the press.

Okay, look, just put
your head down

and don't say anything,
okay?

You got this.
We got this.

You got this.
We got this.

Excuse me. Excuse me.
I'm here.

I'm here.
Excuse me.

Excuse --
You know what?

Members of the press,

try to have some dignity,
okay?

[ Reporters clamoring ]

Give her some air.
She needs air, all right?

She needs air.
Move back.

Move back.
Move back.

She's a human.

-Did you know he had a daughter?
-Dory, why did you do it?

Okay, we're in.

I just want everyone to know
that I had absolutely nothing

to do with the death
of Keith Powell,

and neither did
Drew Gardner.

This is just
a huge misunderstanding,

and I'm completely innocent.

Thank you very much.

Come on. Come on.
Thank you!

[ Reporters clamoring ]

Now, Drew,
I just want you to know

that I'm on your side
no matter what.

And we're going
to put up a fight.

I didn't mean
to do it.

It was self-defense.

-What's that, son?
-Frank, Frank, the TV.

I just want everyone to know
that I had absolutely nothing

to do with the death
of Keith Powell,

and neither did Drew Gardner.

This is just
a huge misunderstanding,

and I'm completely innocent.

Thank you.

Okay, great!

We're innocent!

I love my innocent son.

Kids!

Kiiiidddss!

Jules! Wyatt!

God.

Oh, my God.

What are we
supposed to do now?

We have to lay low
on two levels now.

We have to dye our hair
back immediately,

Ell--
-I cannot. I cannot.

Okay, my hair is finally
growing back.

It'll just kill it all.

And I get that.

I'm actually glad
we're here.

I mean,
I know initially my, like,

instinct to just flee
to the beach

was clearly just a reaction
to the extraordinary anxiety

flowing through my veins,

but it makes so much
more sense now

because now we can just sit here
and we can wait

for Drew and Dory to get
out of jail and just come here,

and we'll all talk and get
on the same goddamn page.

Mm-hmm,
I love that.

-And you know what else?
-What?

I bet Dory's being
really smart right now.

Mm-hmm.

I bet she's telling them
it was self-defense.

Because that's basically
the truth.

It was self-defense.

Oh, my God, it was
self-defense, Portia.

Oh, my God.

Like, it was...
-It was.

...self-defense.

It's occurring to me
for the first time,

and I'm like,
it's hitting me like a wave

like we're gonna be
totally fine because --

because
it was self-defense.

Oh, my God.

Do you hear that?!

Do you hear that,
dolphins?!

The truth
will set us free!

Yeah!
Did you hear that, dolphins?

It was self-defense!

-Yeah!
-The truth will set us free!

Both:
The truth will set us free!

The truth will set us free!

♪♪

♪♪

♪ Four o'clock cigarette ♪

♪ Get a better mind-set ♪

♪ Moving too fast ♪