Regular Show (2009–2017): Season 6, Episode 3 - Daddy Issues - full transcript
CJ joins the mini golf tournament but finds out that her dad signed up. Will she beat him?
[♪♪♪]
[RIGBY GRUMBLES]
We've only moved
3 inches in this line,
and I'm starving!
EILEEN:
You just had breakfast, Rigby.
Yeah, a whole half-hour ago!
Ugh!
All right!
Now we're talkin'!
Here you go, four cheddargeddons
with a side of tomato bisque.
Aw, ye-eah!
"Cheddarged-in" ma stomach!
Ha ha! Nice.
Hey, man, what's with
the golf balls?
Those are complementary
golf balls for our new
"sink hole de queso"
challenge.
If you get a hole in one,
your party eats for free.
Oh, yes!
Dude!
What are you doing?
Free stuff always
tastes better!
Now let's do this!
[CHUCKLING]
[GRUNTS]
[YELLS]
Mordecai, you got
to make this shot!
I don't want to have to eat
my lunch off the bathroom door.
M-o-o-ove.
Nooo!
Why?
Sorry, dude.
Oh, oh!
My turn!
Awww.
Sorry, Rigby.
Your turn, C.J.
Uh... that's okay.
I think I'll pass.
Aw, come on. just try it.
You can't be any worse than us.
I just really
don't like mini-golf.
Please, C.J.!
I'm so hungry!
[SIGHS]
Here.
[GRUMBLES]
Boss! Boss!
Someone won!
Cheeses, havarti
and provolone!
We have a winner!
Chas Melter, CEO
and founder of Cheezers.
You are the first
and only customer
to beat the Sink Hole
de queso challenge!
Congratulations!
Huh?
Say, with skills like that,
you got to play in the
Putterpalooza this weekend!
Uh, sponsored by Cheezers,
of course.
Grand Prize is a
"Cut the Cheezers" card!
Win one of these babies,
and you get to cut to the
front of the line for life!
Oh, ye-eah!
No more lines!
Look, I don't want to do this.
I don't like mini-golf!
And I don't like
waiting in line.
We're talking about
cutting in front of people
and getting away
with it!
You're the only one
who can win this for us!
Yeah, C.J.
you're really good.
It'll be really fun.
Just try it and see.
Think of all the time
we'll save skipping
all the lines.
[SIGHS]
Okay, I'll play.
Aw, ye-eah!
cut the Cheezers!
But I'm gonna need practice
to enter the tournament.
You don't
need practice.
You're "gouda" 'nuff to win!
I get paid extra to say that.
[♪♪♪]
Okay. Don't get your hopes up.
I'm a little rusty.
That's what
you call rusty?
Intuitive
pivoting,
Angle
control.
You got serious
skills, C.J.!
How did I not know
you're amazing at this?
Eh. I'm full
of surprises.
[THUNDER RUMBLES]
How did I miss
that shot?!
It was so easy!
Whoa, whoa! C.J.!
No need to get upset.
It's just mini-golf.
Is something the matter?
I can't help taking
mini-golf seriously.
It kind of runs in the family.
[SIGHS]
My Dad is Carl Putter.
Whoa!
Carl Putter?
The world champion
mini-golf pro?
That explains
so much.
Wait, so your
last name is "Putter"?
No, that's just
his mini-golf name.
Look, it's not
something I really
like to talk about.
Growing up with
a mini-golf legend
as your dad, well...
it can be pretty tough.
Come on!
Focus! Focus!
Hmm. Not bad...
if you like losing.
It takes a little finesse if
you want to beat your old man.
[♪♪♪]
Ha ha!
He never let me win.
Ooh!
Too slow!
In your face!
And he was a real sore winner.
Until I finally had enough.
Don't mess it up.
Don't mess it up!
What are you doing?!
I didn't teach you
to play it safe!
But, Dad, I'll
be able to make
the next shot easy,
and then I'll get
second place.
Second place is just
the first loser!
You got to go
all or nothing!
[THUNDER RUMBLES]
Aw, don't take it
out on the putter.
It's not the putter's fault
you played bad!
And that was the last
time I ever played.
Until yesterday.
Whoa!
That was crazy!
Geez, C.J.
I had no idea.
You don't have to play
in this tournament
if you don't want to.
Yes, you do!
You're our only hope
at that
"Cut the Cheezers" card!
Tthink of the children -- me!
I'm the children!
I think I still
want to play.
Without my Dad around,
I can actually
enjoy it for once.
[CHUCKLES]
Awesome.
MAN:
Hey, my car!
Who did this?!
Huh?! What's the matter?
You don't want your club back?!
I think we've had
enough practice today.
[♪♪♪]
Go, C.J.!
[CROWD MURMURING]
Oh, no.
Ugh! I knew it!
There you go!
Keep on puttin'
the good putt!
Dad!
Hey! Ceej!
Dad, what are you
doing here?!
Well, I was hittin' the
mini-green with my ol' pal
Chas Melter the other day,
and he mentioned someone was
playing in the Putterpalooza.
Didn't think you'd be dustin'
off the ol' mini-clubs, kiddo.
[GRUMBLES]
Dad!
I don't
want you here!
Hey,
I want to see if you
still have the chops
to come in second place
to your old man.
Ha haaa!
Uh, hello,
Mr. Putter.
My name's Mordecai.
I'm dating your daughter.
It's probably not my place
to say anything,
but what you're doing
is not cool.
Forget it, Mordecai.
Let's just go.
Ooh! We got a sensitive
guy over here.
You must not be very
competitive, eh, pal?
I'll bet the only trophies
you ever won were for crying
'cause you're
so sensitive!
Ha haaa!
ALL:
Oooh!
That's it!
Time to put you
in your place, Dad!
Ho ho!
Feelin' gutsy, huh?
Well, since I'm here,
I might as well play, too.
Can't let you have all the fun.
Ha haaa!
Another first-place victory
for Carl Putter.
We'll see about that.
See you in the line
at Cheezers
with all the other
amateurs, kiddo.
[GRUMBLES]
[♪♪♪]
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
Yes!
ALL:
C.J.! C.J.! C.J.!
All right, folks!
We have a tie!
From here on out, this will be
a sudden-death putt-off.
Both of you putting
at the exact same time!
First one to miss
a shot loses!
Yeah! Never lost
one of these in my life!
It's true.
He never has.
Until now!
You can do this.
Let the sudden-death
round begin!
[ALARM BLARING]
[ROARS]
[HISSES]
[♪♪♪]
I hate
mini-golf.
You first, kiddo.
No. after you.
If you insist.
Top that!
Ha haaa!
[GRUMBLES]
[GRUNTING]
End of the line,
squirt.
Ha haaa!
[RUMBLING]
[SHRIEKS]
Carl Putter missed
the final hole!
If C.J. makes this
next shot, she'll win!
Come on!
Let's get out of here!
No!
I'm gonna make this shot!
That's crazy!
If I can't make it,
you can't do it, either!
That's what you want me
to think so you can win!
[SHRIEKS]
I got to go all or nothing!
Just like you told me,
remember?!
Fine. All
or nothing!
[SHRIEKING CONTINUES]
[GRUNTS]
[C.J. SCREAMS]
C.J.!
C.J., are you okay?
[GRUNTS]
Clear me a path!
I need to make
this last shot!
All clear!
[RUMBLING]
[SCREAMS]
Run!
No!
I have to beat my Dad!
[ROARS]
Paws off my daughter while
she's trying to putt!
[SHRIEKS]
Ohh!
Now sink that putt, C.J.!
[♪♪♪]
Congratulations, C.J.!
You've won the Putterpalooza!
Nice puttin', Ceej.
You finally beat
your old man.
I'm sorry for being
so hard on you.
I was trying to prepare you
for the world
the only way I knew how,
by crushing you at mini-golf.
It's okay, Dad.
'cause I finally
whupped your putt!
Whoo-ha-haaa!
Ha haaa!
I've been waiting a long time
for that trash talk.
Thanks for helping me,
Mordecai.
No ne's ever had my back
like you do.
Aww. Anytime, Ceej.
C.J., here is your official
"Cut the Cheezers" card!
You know, after making up
with my Dad,
this seems kind
of beside the point. Meh.
[GASPS]
Nooo!
[SOBS]
Don't worry, Rigby.
I'll wait in line
at Cheezers with you.
I'll wait.
[♪♪♪]
[RIGBY GRUMBLES]
We've only moved
3 inches in this line,
and I'm starving!
EILEEN:
You just had breakfast, Rigby.
Yeah, a whole half-hour ago!
Ugh!
All right!
Now we're talkin'!
Here you go, four cheddargeddons
with a side of tomato bisque.
Aw, ye-eah!
"Cheddarged-in" ma stomach!
Ha ha! Nice.
Hey, man, what's with
the golf balls?
Those are complementary
golf balls for our new
"sink hole de queso"
challenge.
If you get a hole in one,
your party eats for free.
Oh, yes!
Dude!
What are you doing?
Free stuff always
tastes better!
Now let's do this!
[CHUCKLING]
[GRUNTS]
[YELLS]
Mordecai, you got
to make this shot!
I don't want to have to eat
my lunch off the bathroom door.
M-o-o-ove.
Nooo!
Why?
Sorry, dude.
Oh, oh!
My turn!
Awww.
Sorry, Rigby.
Your turn, C.J.
Uh... that's okay.
I think I'll pass.
Aw, come on. just try it.
You can't be any worse than us.
I just really
don't like mini-golf.
Please, C.J.!
I'm so hungry!
[SIGHS]
Here.
[GRUMBLES]
Boss! Boss!
Someone won!
Cheeses, havarti
and provolone!
We have a winner!
Chas Melter, CEO
and founder of Cheezers.
You are the first
and only customer
to beat the Sink Hole
de queso challenge!
Congratulations!
Huh?
Say, with skills like that,
you got to play in the
Putterpalooza this weekend!
Uh, sponsored by Cheezers,
of course.
Grand Prize is a
"Cut the Cheezers" card!
Win one of these babies,
and you get to cut to the
front of the line for life!
Oh, ye-eah!
No more lines!
Look, I don't want to do this.
I don't like mini-golf!
And I don't like
waiting in line.
We're talking about
cutting in front of people
and getting away
with it!
You're the only one
who can win this for us!
Yeah, C.J.
you're really good.
It'll be really fun.
Just try it and see.
Think of all the time
we'll save skipping
all the lines.
[SIGHS]
Okay, I'll play.
Aw, ye-eah!
cut the Cheezers!
But I'm gonna need practice
to enter the tournament.
You don't
need practice.
You're "gouda" 'nuff to win!
I get paid extra to say that.
[♪♪♪]
Okay. Don't get your hopes up.
I'm a little rusty.
That's what
you call rusty?
Intuitive
pivoting,
Angle
control.
You got serious
skills, C.J.!
How did I not know
you're amazing at this?
Eh. I'm full
of surprises.
[THUNDER RUMBLES]
How did I miss
that shot?!
It was so easy!
Whoa, whoa! C.J.!
No need to get upset.
It's just mini-golf.
Is something the matter?
I can't help taking
mini-golf seriously.
It kind of runs in the family.
[SIGHS]
My Dad is Carl Putter.
Whoa!
Carl Putter?
The world champion
mini-golf pro?
That explains
so much.
Wait, so your
last name is "Putter"?
No, that's just
his mini-golf name.
Look, it's not
something I really
like to talk about.
Growing up with
a mini-golf legend
as your dad, well...
it can be pretty tough.
Come on!
Focus! Focus!
Hmm. Not bad...
if you like losing.
It takes a little finesse if
you want to beat your old man.
[♪♪♪]
Ha ha!
He never let me win.
Ooh!
Too slow!
In your face!
And he was a real sore winner.
Until I finally had enough.
Don't mess it up.
Don't mess it up!
What are you doing?!
I didn't teach you
to play it safe!
But, Dad, I'll
be able to make
the next shot easy,
and then I'll get
second place.
Second place is just
the first loser!
You got to go
all or nothing!
[THUNDER RUMBLES]
Aw, don't take it
out on the putter.
It's not the putter's fault
you played bad!
And that was the last
time I ever played.
Until yesterday.
Whoa!
That was crazy!
Geez, C.J.
I had no idea.
You don't have to play
in this tournament
if you don't want to.
Yes, you do!
You're our only hope
at that
"Cut the Cheezers" card!
Tthink of the children -- me!
I'm the children!
I think I still
want to play.
Without my Dad around,
I can actually
enjoy it for once.
[CHUCKLES]
Awesome.
MAN:
Hey, my car!
Who did this?!
Huh?! What's the matter?
You don't want your club back?!
I think we've had
enough practice today.
[♪♪♪]
Go, C.J.!
[CROWD MURMURING]
Oh, no.
Ugh! I knew it!
There you go!
Keep on puttin'
the good putt!
Dad!
Hey! Ceej!
Dad, what are you
doing here?!
Well, I was hittin' the
mini-green with my ol' pal
Chas Melter the other day,
and he mentioned someone was
playing in the Putterpalooza.
Didn't think you'd be dustin'
off the ol' mini-clubs, kiddo.
[GRUMBLES]
Dad!
I don't
want you here!
Hey,
I want to see if you
still have the chops
to come in second place
to your old man.
Ha haaa!
Uh, hello,
Mr. Putter.
My name's Mordecai.
I'm dating your daughter.
It's probably not my place
to say anything,
but what you're doing
is not cool.
Forget it, Mordecai.
Let's just go.
Ooh! We got a sensitive
guy over here.
You must not be very
competitive, eh, pal?
I'll bet the only trophies
you ever won were for crying
'cause you're
so sensitive!
Ha haaa!
ALL:
Oooh!
That's it!
Time to put you
in your place, Dad!
Ho ho!
Feelin' gutsy, huh?
Well, since I'm here,
I might as well play, too.
Can't let you have all the fun.
Ha haaa!
Another first-place victory
for Carl Putter.
We'll see about that.
See you in the line
at Cheezers
with all the other
amateurs, kiddo.
[GRUMBLES]
[♪♪♪]
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
Yes!
ALL:
C.J.! C.J.! C.J.!
All right, folks!
We have a tie!
From here on out, this will be
a sudden-death putt-off.
Both of you putting
at the exact same time!
First one to miss
a shot loses!
Yeah! Never lost
one of these in my life!
It's true.
He never has.
Until now!
You can do this.
Let the sudden-death
round begin!
[ALARM BLARING]
[ROARS]
[HISSES]
[♪♪♪]
I hate
mini-golf.
You first, kiddo.
No. after you.
If you insist.
Top that!
Ha haaa!
[GRUMBLES]
[GRUNTING]
End of the line,
squirt.
Ha haaa!
[RUMBLING]
[SHRIEKS]
Carl Putter missed
the final hole!
If C.J. makes this
next shot, she'll win!
Come on!
Let's get out of here!
No!
I'm gonna make this shot!
That's crazy!
If I can't make it,
you can't do it, either!
That's what you want me
to think so you can win!
[SHRIEKS]
I got to go all or nothing!
Just like you told me,
remember?!
Fine. All
or nothing!
[SHRIEKING CONTINUES]
[GRUNTS]
[C.J. SCREAMS]
C.J.!
C.J., are you okay?
[GRUNTS]
Clear me a path!
I need to make
this last shot!
All clear!
[RUMBLING]
[SCREAMS]
Run!
No!
I have to beat my Dad!
[ROARS]
Paws off my daughter while
she's trying to putt!
[SHRIEKS]
Ohh!
Now sink that putt, C.J.!
[♪♪♪]
Congratulations, C.J.!
You've won the Putterpalooza!
Nice puttin', Ceej.
You finally beat
your old man.
I'm sorry for being
so hard on you.
I was trying to prepare you
for the world
the only way I knew how,
by crushing you at mini-golf.
It's okay, Dad.
'cause I finally
whupped your putt!
Whoo-ha-haaa!
Ha haaa!
I've been waiting a long time
for that trash talk.
Thanks for helping me,
Mordecai.
No ne's ever had my back
like you do.
Aww. Anytime, Ceej.
C.J., here is your official
"Cut the Cheezers" card!
You know, after making up
with my Dad,
this seems kind
of beside the point. Meh.
[GASPS]
Nooo!
[SOBS]
Don't worry, Rigby.
I'll wait in line
at Cheezers with you.
I'll wait.
[♪♪♪]