Randy Cunningham: 9th Grade Ninja (2012–2015): Season 1, Episode 3 - McFists of Fury - full transcript
¶ Go, ninja! ¶
[boy] I was chosen
to protect my school
from the forces of evil.
I am the ninja.
I am Randy Cunningham.
¶ Smoke bomb! ¶
[grunts]
Where do you think
you're going?
Oh, up the wall.
Yeah, OK.
Guess I'll Ninja Sprint!
Nah, I don't think so.
- [growling]
- [beeping]
Just one second.
I'm so sorry.
Status update, Howard.
Bash is giving out invites
to his party right now.
Boom! Boom!
Show your Bash mark
at the door.
[chuckles] Boom!
We cannot miss
the Bash Splash.
It's legendary!
I heard last year they filled
the pool with McSquiddles.
McSquiddles!
Lick the lightning!
On my way.
Just gotta brain the lizard.
Ninja Sneeze!
[sneezes]
Gesundheit.
Oh, schnasty!
What the juice?
He's gone.
[Howard] So is our shot
at the Bash Splash
if you don't get down here.
Lizard, Bash Splash.
Lizard, Bash Splash.
What to do, what to do.
He only ate a booger.
There's no way that could
come back to haunt me.
Boom!
Boom!
You two are in
my gym class.
You wear them
zip-up kicks.
- Yeah, we do.
- Check 'em out.
Zip-ups is for shoobies.
No Bash!
Ah, why do you have to be
such a shoobie?
The greatest party in
the history of high school
and we're not invited.
This burns, man.
This burns deep.
Yeah, it's too bad
we can't just sneak in.
I mean, it's not like one of us
is the ninja or anything.
Howard, I can't
just ninja out
because we want to go
to Bash's party.
Now, if Bash's stepdad
was my arch-nemesis, or...
Oh, my ninja!
I'll be in the Nomicon.
And I'll be in
Grave Punchers Four.
Punchzilla's Revenge,
Punch Master Edition.
"A ninja must master
the art of stealth."
Yes, OK, yes.
Reveal, conceal.
Conceal, reveal.
Camouflage!
Ah, that is so brute.
- [gasps]
- Jab, jab. Haymaker!
- Howard!
- [game] Congratulations.
You are a world's
worstest grave puncher.
Oh! This better
be good, Cunningham.
Good?
It's only the cheese.
I got us two tickets
to the Bash Splash.
[Randy] Throw the haymaker!
The Nomicon told you
to tell me to deck you?
I've always liked
that book.
So, how we getting into
the Bash Splash?
Yes, this is how.
Everybody at that party
will have a Bash mark,
including us.
Now if the world's worstest
grave puncher would hurry up...
Ow!
No one jokes about
my grave punching.
Huh?
Ooh, ooh,
do me, do me!
- [punching]
- [Howard shouts]
[both] We're gonna
crash the Bash Splash!
Look at that beautiful
ninja slinger.
Jelly, slightly ropey,
and that color.
Focus, Viceroy.
Bash's party
will be filled with
the coolest kids
at Norrisville High.
Surely one of them
is the ninja.
Thanks to this snot sample,
we'll finally learn
his true identity!
You're a genius.
We're in.
Get out. It's gotta be
over 173 feet.
[chirping]
Do you know
what that means?
I do not.
It's the highest board
in Norrisville.
I can pull the ultimate
belly whopper.
Finally,
I'll show Uncle Rod
that I'm the king
of the Weinerman Whop.
Bash alert.
Something o'clock.
[shouts]
Hannibal, Bashford refuses
to re-apply his SPF.
Oh, my baby boy is gonna
get burned for jeeper's sake.
[grumbles]
Hey!
Cut it out, McJerk!
That was close.
And a little sad.
If Bash recognizes us,
we're booted.
- For realsies.
- I'm with ya'.
We need to make sure
we blend in.
Stay off Bash's radar,
lay low.
Is that a choco-fountain?
Yes. Yes, it is.
[lapping]
[shrieking]
Bash Splash!
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
That was even closer. We were
right under his nose, and...
[both] Sumo Slide!
Right behind you, Big H.
Hooray!
[both shouting]
[both gasping]
[Bash] Bash Splash!
Dude, is it me,
or are we totally
pulling this off?
Hmm? Well, who
do we have here?
McFist.
I mean, hello.
Nice to meet you,
Mr. McFist,
as you and I have never
met in the past, ever.
We're Bashford's school chums.
Here we are.
By the way,
Bash is not an idiot.
Bash Splash, Bash Splash,
Bash Splash!
Yeah, he's a delight.
Hiya, boys. Hope you're
enjoying Bashy's Splashy.
Oh, have you
blown your nose yet?
- [both] Huh?
- [clears throat]
McFist Industries
is proud to announce
the revolution in
nostril clearing technology.
McFissues.
For your blow and go
lifestyle.
[Marcy]
Sneeze into Atchoo D2,
play Schnoz Sniper,
or just try your hand
at Pick It and Flick It.
Ah, it's a hoot!
What is it, boogers?
Just make sure
you take a picture
so we can ID your icky.
[laughing]
Don't have any bats
in the cave.
Boogie shy, huh?
No problem.
Robo-lizard!
What the juice?
Not...gonna...sneeze.
I'm gonna sneeze!
- [sneezes]
- [clicking]
Gesundheit.
Enjoy the party.
- [gasping]
- [horse neighing]
Guess who won
heaviest tissue?
A robo-lizard
snagged my snot.
McFist has a finger in the nose
of every kid here.
I have to find out why.
But I'll need a distraction.
Howard, warm me up
a whopper.
- What about laying low?
- There's a time to lay low,
and there's a time to whop.
Go show Uncle Rod
why you wear the big trunks.
[laughing]
- Bash Splash!
- [Howard] Hey, Bash.
I know you.
You're that shoe.
You weren't supposed
to be Bashed!
That's right,
I crashed the Bash Splash.
What you gonna
do about it?
Get him, bros!
Huh?
Ninja Foot Spikes!
You're not blending
on me this time.
[all shouting]
Fabulous work.
Now we simply wait for
one of these nose nuggets
to match the ninja.
Can you say smoothie time?
Gesundheit.
I really must start
reading to you.
Boogers.
Boogers, boogers.
They're all boogers!
[panting]
[beeping]
This better be good.
Ooh, that is good!
Be right there.
Sorry, bugaboo.
Gotta get to the lab.
I'm seconds away
from having the ninja
right where I want him.
You are so adorable
when you're scheming
to destroy the ninja.
- [slurping]
- Uh-huh, OK.
What the juice?
[machine] Heidi Weinerman.
No match.
Mike Moe.
No match.
That's my booger.
[grunting]
[laughing]
[grunting]
Oh, schnasty!
This is it, Viceroy.
The ninja is toast.
Gotta get my booger back.
The art of stealth.
Conceal and reveal.
Conceal ain't doing jack.
Time to switch to reveal.
You boys looking for me?
Ninja! Ha!
Told ya' he'd be
at the Splash.
Nailed it again, sir.
Sorry to break up
your little phlegm fiesta,
but you've got some lung butter
that belongs to me.
Ninja found.
We got a match!
- Oh, boy.
- You're too late, ninja.
Or should I call you...
[sneezing]
Viceroy match.
Viceroy. Viceroy?
- Viceroy!
- Seriously?
How could I be the ninja,
he's standing right there.
Ninja Kick!
Well, I pretty much
adios'd your booger machine,
so smoke bomb!
Ha! Idiot.
We can rebuild the machine.
The important thing is we've
still got all the samples.
Huh. Had not
thought of that.
Stop him!
Wow, that's a lot
of robo-lizards.
I'm gonna whop!
You ain't whoppin'
on my watch.
- Yeah.
- [laughing]
[all] Aw.
[all screaming]
Ole!
[screaming]
Boom!
OK, I admit.
This is a setback.
But we still have
the boogers.
We put 'em on new slides,
rebuild the machine,
and ha!
Back in business.
Come on, McFist.
Don't you think it's time
to throw in the tissue?
- [rumbling]
- [growling]
Ninja Ring!
[whimpering, groaning]
[all cheering]
Yeah!
[groans]
Worth it.
Ninja Surf!
The water's all booger-ey.
So gross!
Oh, hey, buddy.
We're busted.
Nice try, shoobies.
Nobody crashes
the Bash Splash!
[horse neighing]
Oh, look what
they did to Uni!
This party was
a total disaster.
What are you talking about?
You're the king
of the Weinerman Whop.
And I protected
the ninja's identity.
And I won heaviest tissue.
See, that's the spirit.
Not bad for our first
high school party, right?
Schweet! Fireworks.
Fireworks filled
with McSquiddles.
[both] Lick the lightning!
- Hot, super hot!
- Mmm, so good.
[both chattering]
[shouting]
That...
[groans]
...hurt.
Uh-oh.
[growling]
Smoke bomb!
[confused growl]
OK, Nomicon.
Little help here.
"When faced with
a mighty enemy,
counter with
a mightier force."
Mightier force?
What's mightier
than a killer robot?
Ninja Chain-sicle!
[shouting]
Uh-oh.
[groans]
Robo-burp!
I totally tasted that.
It's in my mouth.
I can't get it
out of my mouth.
Counter with
a mightier force.
Here force.
Aw, yeah!
Shovel.
[laughing]
Uh-oh.
Gravity.
That's a mightier force.
Or is it a law?
Man, I gotta start paying
attention in science class.
Science class!
[groaning]
Huh?
[static]
Hmm.
[farting sound]
[laughs]
Oh, no!
Fart box.
Howard's gonna love this.
[bell ringing]
In other words,
Mr. Weinerman,
if you were this bone you'd be
failing thigh school science.
[laughing]
Thigh school.
Zing!
[scoffs] Brown noser.
Hey, Howard,
did I miss anything?
No.
Ah, Mr. Cunningham.
I was just telling
your lab partner
that the two of you
are failing my class.
So I didn't miss anything.
Oh, yeah.
We're failing science.
And the only way
you two will pass
is if you win
tomorrow's science fair.
[scoffs]
That is no problem.
We have a totally
awesome project.
You do?
- Yes.
- We do?
[whispers] No.
Well, we'll see tomorrow.
But I warn you,
you won't find
failing science
very humorous.
Oh, Jerry.
[laughing] Humorous.
- Double zing!
- Brown noser.
That's what I said.
[McFist] You better not
be coming in here
to tell me your robot
failed to destroy the ninja.
Never mind.
Get back here, I'm not done
yelling at you!
Oh, Hannibal.
Inside voice.
Yes, Marcy,
my little sugar knuckles.
Meatballs, sweet!
Bashford, science fair
is coming up,
and I thought you two could do
a little father-stepson bonding
working on
his project together.
When is this science fair?
- It's tomorrow.
- What's the matter,
couldn't wait until
the absolute last minute?
[scoffs] Dummy!
There's like a ton of minutes
between now and tomorrow.
I know you're busy hatching
evil schemes and so forth,
but it sure would be swell.
Anything, my little
butter face.
Oh, look at my two big,
strong science fellas!
Hey, don't build me
nothing stupid.
Viceroy, get in here!
[Viceroy] Not if you're
gonna yell at me.
[shouting] I'm not gonna
yell at you!
Howard, this is it.
We're gonna come up with
a first place
science project.
Right after I do,
uh, this.
- [farting sound]
- [both laughing]
O-M-genius.
Where'd you get
the fart box?
Took it off a McFist robot.
- [farts]
- [both laugh]
Oh, it farts.
It just keeps farting!
Oh. OK, enough of that.
Time to work.
It just keeps farting!
[farting, laughing continues]
[rooster crowing]
Just keeps farting.
- Never gets old.
- It really doesn't.
Hey, what happened
to the nighttime?
We farted it away!
Literally.
Well, what are we gonna do
about the science fair?
- OK, how about this?
- Really, now?
No, we could use the box.
It's totally science-y.
[loud fart]
Hang on. You want us
to hand in the fart box
off a killer robot
as our project?
- Mm-hmm.
- Cunningham, do you realize
how incredibly stupid
it would be for us...
Not to do that!
Oh, I'm gonna clear some room
on my report card
for an A plus.
It'll be that sweet
little island of success
on an ocean of D's.
Behold. Ahh!
A spud-powered TV remote
for the ultimate couch potato.
Potato humor. Zing!
[laughing]
Science fair's in the bag.
Hurry up,
I ain't got all day!
There. My invention...
- My invention.
- Bash's invention
converts common feline waste
into electricity.
[meowing]
I have a million
billion dollars.
Can't we get a cat
that poops on command?
Sorry.
Fluffy gets stage fright.
- [farting]
- [clinking]
Ooh, there he goes.
[Bash] The cat's
doing poops!
Quit showing off,
fuzzball.
Save some for the judges!
Now, as you see, our students
put a lot of thought
into their projects.
They worked their fingers
to the bone.
Any chance one of 'em
came up with some sort
of self-perpetuating,
artificial food stuff?
[laughs] I don't
think so, why?
No reason.
Certainly not because
I diverted the semester's
cafeteria budget
to repairing my hoopty.
[chuckles] No.
Well, boys, let's see
the totally awesome
project you promised.
Since the dawn of time,
man has sought an escape
from... silence.
Today, his quest is over.
[lights shutting off]
[blows kazoo]
Behold, the wonder
of sound.
[loud farting]
[both laughing]
[quiet coughing]
I think they missed it.
Hit 'em again!
Boys, that is not science.
But, no, no, no.
You push the button here...
[farting]
...and the sound
comes out there.
That's the very definition
of science.
No. It's the very
definition of fail.
[Howard] An F?!
Please, Mr. Driscoll,
she's being totally unfair.
You think you've
got it bad.
Try being married to her.
Oh, Jerry.
You're terrible.
Stupid wonder of sound.
Hey!
My project!
Whoa! I just scienced
this thing up a notch.
Dude, we gotta
show Driscoll!
[gasps]
[growling]
Potato coming to life.
No big deal.
[whimpering]
OK, that's a big deal.
Ninja time,
definitely ninja time.
Ninja Flip!
Ninja Rotating Table Slide!
[shouting]
Ninja-side, hiya!
Anyone order
a side of fries?
Ha! Potato humor.
Ninja, you are the zing!
[chuckles] You said it,
I didn't say it.
- That was you.
- [growling]
How 'bout that?
Ha!
[all screaming]
Chop, chop, chop, chop!
I really thought it
would work that time.
I don't know why.
[all growling]
Oh, potatoes!
Potatoes, potatoes,
potatoes, potatoes!
Mrs. D, we just
wanted you to know
there's no hard feelings
about the F that you gave us.
In fact, we'd like to
give you a second chance
to give us a second chance.
Mr. Weinerman, in case
you hadn't noticed,
we're being attacked by...
[gasps]
Stupid Driscoll.
Thinks she's the king
of science or something.
Not my biggest problem
right now.
[cat screeches]
What is that?
It's the number C, dummy.
Thanks for nothing, McFist.
You gave me a science guy
who can't even count to C.
I'm telling Mom!
I'm not afraid!
Sir, if you're done with your
little domestic kerfuffle,
there's a potato uprising
that may interest you.
Ninja! Why didn't you think
ahead and bring a killer robot?
Maybe I did.
Well, did you
or didn't you?
Of course I did.
What kind of evil genius
would I be if I didn't?
[meowing]
Ha, yes! Attack.
Killer robot?
Bring it on!
[laughing]
- [kid] My project!
- Sorry.
Go robot!
Yeah, to your doom.
Yay, ninja.
"When faced with
a mighty enemy,
counter with
a mighty force."
OK, giant robot.
It's potato mashing time!
Boom! Gravity.
Science.
- [meowing]
- Oh, boy.
[squeaks]
OK, students.
Whose project caused
those potatoes to mutate?
Well, then, I guess
we'll never know
who solved the school's
food shortage,
- and won first place.
- Right here.
Why do we have to
clean this up?
Well, I mean, it was
our science project
that turned
those innocent potatoes
into rampaging psycho spuds.
Yeah. Guess that's
what we get for handing in
someone else's fart box
as our project.
Hey, Howard. We learned
a valuable lesson today.
[both laughing]
Oh, valuable lesson.
Where did you
come up with that?
I don't know. I mean,
it's a gift, it's a gift.
- [farting]
- [Randy] Please tell me
that was the box.
[Howard] Wish I could, buddy.
Wish I could.
[boy] I was chosen
to protect my school
from the forces of evil.
I am the ninja.
I am Randy Cunningham.
¶ Smoke bomb! ¶
[grunts]
Where do you think
you're going?
Oh, up the wall.
Yeah, OK.
Guess I'll Ninja Sprint!
Nah, I don't think so.
- [growling]
- [beeping]
Just one second.
I'm so sorry.
Status update, Howard.
Bash is giving out invites
to his party right now.
Boom! Boom!
Show your Bash mark
at the door.
[chuckles] Boom!
We cannot miss
the Bash Splash.
It's legendary!
I heard last year they filled
the pool with McSquiddles.
McSquiddles!
Lick the lightning!
On my way.
Just gotta brain the lizard.
Ninja Sneeze!
[sneezes]
Gesundheit.
Oh, schnasty!
What the juice?
He's gone.
[Howard] So is our shot
at the Bash Splash
if you don't get down here.
Lizard, Bash Splash.
Lizard, Bash Splash.
What to do, what to do.
He only ate a booger.
There's no way that could
come back to haunt me.
Boom!
Boom!
You two are in
my gym class.
You wear them
zip-up kicks.
- Yeah, we do.
- Check 'em out.
Zip-ups is for shoobies.
No Bash!
Ah, why do you have to be
such a shoobie?
The greatest party in
the history of high school
and we're not invited.
This burns, man.
This burns deep.
Yeah, it's too bad
we can't just sneak in.
I mean, it's not like one of us
is the ninja or anything.
Howard, I can't
just ninja out
because we want to go
to Bash's party.
Now, if Bash's stepdad
was my arch-nemesis, or...
Oh, my ninja!
I'll be in the Nomicon.
And I'll be in
Grave Punchers Four.
Punchzilla's Revenge,
Punch Master Edition.
"A ninja must master
the art of stealth."
Yes, OK, yes.
Reveal, conceal.
Conceal, reveal.
Camouflage!
Ah, that is so brute.
- [gasps]
- Jab, jab. Haymaker!
- Howard!
- [game] Congratulations.
You are a world's
worstest grave puncher.
Oh! This better
be good, Cunningham.
Good?
It's only the cheese.
I got us two tickets
to the Bash Splash.
[Randy] Throw the haymaker!
The Nomicon told you
to tell me to deck you?
I've always liked
that book.
So, how we getting into
the Bash Splash?
Yes, this is how.
Everybody at that party
will have a Bash mark,
including us.
Now if the world's worstest
grave puncher would hurry up...
Ow!
No one jokes about
my grave punching.
Huh?
Ooh, ooh,
do me, do me!
- [punching]
- [Howard shouts]
[both] We're gonna
crash the Bash Splash!
Look at that beautiful
ninja slinger.
Jelly, slightly ropey,
and that color.
Focus, Viceroy.
Bash's party
will be filled with
the coolest kids
at Norrisville High.
Surely one of them
is the ninja.
Thanks to this snot sample,
we'll finally learn
his true identity!
You're a genius.
We're in.
Get out. It's gotta be
over 173 feet.
[chirping]
Do you know
what that means?
I do not.
It's the highest board
in Norrisville.
I can pull the ultimate
belly whopper.
Finally,
I'll show Uncle Rod
that I'm the king
of the Weinerman Whop.
Bash alert.
Something o'clock.
[shouts]
Hannibal, Bashford refuses
to re-apply his SPF.
Oh, my baby boy is gonna
get burned for jeeper's sake.
[grumbles]
Hey!
Cut it out, McJerk!
That was close.
And a little sad.
If Bash recognizes us,
we're booted.
- For realsies.
- I'm with ya'.
We need to make sure
we blend in.
Stay off Bash's radar,
lay low.
Is that a choco-fountain?
Yes. Yes, it is.
[lapping]
[shrieking]
Bash Splash!
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
That was even closer. We were
right under his nose, and...
[both] Sumo Slide!
Right behind you, Big H.
Hooray!
[both shouting]
[both gasping]
[Bash] Bash Splash!
Dude, is it me,
or are we totally
pulling this off?
Hmm? Well, who
do we have here?
McFist.
I mean, hello.
Nice to meet you,
Mr. McFist,
as you and I have never
met in the past, ever.
We're Bashford's school chums.
Here we are.
By the way,
Bash is not an idiot.
Bash Splash, Bash Splash,
Bash Splash!
Yeah, he's a delight.
Hiya, boys. Hope you're
enjoying Bashy's Splashy.
Oh, have you
blown your nose yet?
- [both] Huh?
- [clears throat]
McFist Industries
is proud to announce
the revolution in
nostril clearing technology.
McFissues.
For your blow and go
lifestyle.
[Marcy]
Sneeze into Atchoo D2,
play Schnoz Sniper,
or just try your hand
at Pick It and Flick It.
Ah, it's a hoot!
What is it, boogers?
Just make sure
you take a picture
so we can ID your icky.
[laughing]
Don't have any bats
in the cave.
Boogie shy, huh?
No problem.
Robo-lizard!
What the juice?
Not...gonna...sneeze.
I'm gonna sneeze!
- [sneezes]
- [clicking]
Gesundheit.
Enjoy the party.
- [gasping]
- [horse neighing]
Guess who won
heaviest tissue?
A robo-lizard
snagged my snot.
McFist has a finger in the nose
of every kid here.
I have to find out why.
But I'll need a distraction.
Howard, warm me up
a whopper.
- What about laying low?
- There's a time to lay low,
and there's a time to whop.
Go show Uncle Rod
why you wear the big trunks.
[laughing]
- Bash Splash!
- [Howard] Hey, Bash.
I know you.
You're that shoe.
You weren't supposed
to be Bashed!
That's right,
I crashed the Bash Splash.
What you gonna
do about it?
Get him, bros!
Huh?
Ninja Foot Spikes!
You're not blending
on me this time.
[all shouting]
Fabulous work.
Now we simply wait for
one of these nose nuggets
to match the ninja.
Can you say smoothie time?
Gesundheit.
I really must start
reading to you.
Boogers.
Boogers, boogers.
They're all boogers!
[panting]
[beeping]
This better be good.
Ooh, that is good!
Be right there.
Sorry, bugaboo.
Gotta get to the lab.
I'm seconds away
from having the ninja
right where I want him.
You are so adorable
when you're scheming
to destroy the ninja.
- [slurping]
- Uh-huh, OK.
What the juice?
[machine] Heidi Weinerman.
No match.
Mike Moe.
No match.
That's my booger.
[grunting]
[laughing]
[grunting]
Oh, schnasty!
This is it, Viceroy.
The ninja is toast.
Gotta get my booger back.
The art of stealth.
Conceal and reveal.
Conceal ain't doing jack.
Time to switch to reveal.
You boys looking for me?
Ninja! Ha!
Told ya' he'd be
at the Splash.
Nailed it again, sir.
Sorry to break up
your little phlegm fiesta,
but you've got some lung butter
that belongs to me.
Ninja found.
We got a match!
- Oh, boy.
- You're too late, ninja.
Or should I call you...
[sneezing]
Viceroy match.
Viceroy. Viceroy?
- Viceroy!
- Seriously?
How could I be the ninja,
he's standing right there.
Ninja Kick!
Well, I pretty much
adios'd your booger machine,
so smoke bomb!
Ha! Idiot.
We can rebuild the machine.
The important thing is we've
still got all the samples.
Huh. Had not
thought of that.
Stop him!
Wow, that's a lot
of robo-lizards.
I'm gonna whop!
You ain't whoppin'
on my watch.
- Yeah.
- [laughing]
[all] Aw.
[all screaming]
Ole!
[screaming]
Boom!
OK, I admit.
This is a setback.
But we still have
the boogers.
We put 'em on new slides,
rebuild the machine,
and ha!
Back in business.
Come on, McFist.
Don't you think it's time
to throw in the tissue?
- [rumbling]
- [growling]
Ninja Ring!
[whimpering, groaning]
[all cheering]
Yeah!
[groans]
Worth it.
Ninja Surf!
The water's all booger-ey.
So gross!
Oh, hey, buddy.
We're busted.
Nice try, shoobies.
Nobody crashes
the Bash Splash!
[horse neighing]
Oh, look what
they did to Uni!
This party was
a total disaster.
What are you talking about?
You're the king
of the Weinerman Whop.
And I protected
the ninja's identity.
And I won heaviest tissue.
See, that's the spirit.
Not bad for our first
high school party, right?
Schweet! Fireworks.
Fireworks filled
with McSquiddles.
[both] Lick the lightning!
- Hot, super hot!
- Mmm, so good.
[both chattering]
[shouting]
That...
[groans]
...hurt.
Uh-oh.
[growling]
Smoke bomb!
[confused growl]
OK, Nomicon.
Little help here.
"When faced with
a mighty enemy,
counter with
a mightier force."
Mightier force?
What's mightier
than a killer robot?
Ninja Chain-sicle!
[shouting]
Uh-oh.
[groans]
Robo-burp!
I totally tasted that.
It's in my mouth.
I can't get it
out of my mouth.
Counter with
a mightier force.
Here force.
Aw, yeah!
Shovel.
[laughing]
Uh-oh.
Gravity.
That's a mightier force.
Or is it a law?
Man, I gotta start paying
attention in science class.
Science class!
[groaning]
Huh?
[static]
Hmm.
[farting sound]
[laughs]
Oh, no!
Fart box.
Howard's gonna love this.
[bell ringing]
In other words,
Mr. Weinerman,
if you were this bone you'd be
failing thigh school science.
[laughing]
Thigh school.
Zing!
[scoffs] Brown noser.
Hey, Howard,
did I miss anything?
No.
Ah, Mr. Cunningham.
I was just telling
your lab partner
that the two of you
are failing my class.
So I didn't miss anything.
Oh, yeah.
We're failing science.
And the only way
you two will pass
is if you win
tomorrow's science fair.
[scoffs]
That is no problem.
We have a totally
awesome project.
You do?
- Yes.
- We do?
[whispers] No.
Well, we'll see tomorrow.
But I warn you,
you won't find
failing science
very humorous.
Oh, Jerry.
[laughing] Humorous.
- Double zing!
- Brown noser.
That's what I said.
[McFist] You better not
be coming in here
to tell me your robot
failed to destroy the ninja.
Never mind.
Get back here, I'm not done
yelling at you!
Oh, Hannibal.
Inside voice.
Yes, Marcy,
my little sugar knuckles.
Meatballs, sweet!
Bashford, science fair
is coming up,
and I thought you two could do
a little father-stepson bonding
working on
his project together.
When is this science fair?
- It's tomorrow.
- What's the matter,
couldn't wait until
the absolute last minute?
[scoffs] Dummy!
There's like a ton of minutes
between now and tomorrow.
I know you're busy hatching
evil schemes and so forth,
but it sure would be swell.
Anything, my little
butter face.
Oh, look at my two big,
strong science fellas!
Hey, don't build me
nothing stupid.
Viceroy, get in here!
[Viceroy] Not if you're
gonna yell at me.
[shouting] I'm not gonna
yell at you!
Howard, this is it.
We're gonna come up with
a first place
science project.
Right after I do,
uh, this.
- [farting sound]
- [both laughing]
O-M-genius.
Where'd you get
the fart box?
Took it off a McFist robot.
- [farts]
- [both laugh]
Oh, it farts.
It just keeps farting!
Oh. OK, enough of that.
Time to work.
It just keeps farting!
[farting, laughing continues]
[rooster crowing]
Just keeps farting.
- Never gets old.
- It really doesn't.
Hey, what happened
to the nighttime?
We farted it away!
Literally.
Well, what are we gonna do
about the science fair?
- OK, how about this?
- Really, now?
No, we could use the box.
It's totally science-y.
[loud fart]
Hang on. You want us
to hand in the fart box
off a killer robot
as our project?
- Mm-hmm.
- Cunningham, do you realize
how incredibly stupid
it would be for us...
Not to do that!
Oh, I'm gonna clear some room
on my report card
for an A plus.
It'll be that sweet
little island of success
on an ocean of D's.
Behold. Ahh!
A spud-powered TV remote
for the ultimate couch potato.
Potato humor. Zing!
[laughing]
Science fair's in the bag.
Hurry up,
I ain't got all day!
There. My invention...
- My invention.
- Bash's invention
converts common feline waste
into electricity.
[meowing]
I have a million
billion dollars.
Can't we get a cat
that poops on command?
Sorry.
Fluffy gets stage fright.
- [farting]
- [clinking]
Ooh, there he goes.
[Bash] The cat's
doing poops!
Quit showing off,
fuzzball.
Save some for the judges!
Now, as you see, our students
put a lot of thought
into their projects.
They worked their fingers
to the bone.
Any chance one of 'em
came up with some sort
of self-perpetuating,
artificial food stuff?
[laughs] I don't
think so, why?
No reason.
Certainly not because
I diverted the semester's
cafeteria budget
to repairing my hoopty.
[chuckles] No.
Well, boys, let's see
the totally awesome
project you promised.
Since the dawn of time,
man has sought an escape
from... silence.
Today, his quest is over.
[lights shutting off]
[blows kazoo]
Behold, the wonder
of sound.
[loud farting]
[both laughing]
[quiet coughing]
I think they missed it.
Hit 'em again!
Boys, that is not science.
But, no, no, no.
You push the button here...
[farting]
...and the sound
comes out there.
That's the very definition
of science.
No. It's the very
definition of fail.
[Howard] An F?!
Please, Mr. Driscoll,
she's being totally unfair.
You think you've
got it bad.
Try being married to her.
Oh, Jerry.
You're terrible.
Stupid wonder of sound.
Hey!
My project!
Whoa! I just scienced
this thing up a notch.
Dude, we gotta
show Driscoll!
[gasps]
[growling]
Potato coming to life.
No big deal.
[whimpering]
OK, that's a big deal.
Ninja time,
definitely ninja time.
Ninja Flip!
Ninja Rotating Table Slide!
[shouting]
Ninja-side, hiya!
Anyone order
a side of fries?
Ha! Potato humor.
Ninja, you are the zing!
[chuckles] You said it,
I didn't say it.
- That was you.
- [growling]
How 'bout that?
Ha!
[all screaming]
Chop, chop, chop, chop!
I really thought it
would work that time.
I don't know why.
[all growling]
Oh, potatoes!
Potatoes, potatoes,
potatoes, potatoes!
Mrs. D, we just
wanted you to know
there's no hard feelings
about the F that you gave us.
In fact, we'd like to
give you a second chance
to give us a second chance.
Mr. Weinerman, in case
you hadn't noticed,
we're being attacked by...
[gasps]
Stupid Driscoll.
Thinks she's the king
of science or something.
Not my biggest problem
right now.
[cat screeches]
What is that?
It's the number C, dummy.
Thanks for nothing, McFist.
You gave me a science guy
who can't even count to C.
I'm telling Mom!
I'm not afraid!
Sir, if you're done with your
little domestic kerfuffle,
there's a potato uprising
that may interest you.
Ninja! Why didn't you think
ahead and bring a killer robot?
Maybe I did.
Well, did you
or didn't you?
Of course I did.
What kind of evil genius
would I be if I didn't?
[meowing]
Ha, yes! Attack.
Killer robot?
Bring it on!
[laughing]
- [kid] My project!
- Sorry.
Go robot!
Yeah, to your doom.
Yay, ninja.
"When faced with
a mighty enemy,
counter with
a mighty force."
OK, giant robot.
It's potato mashing time!
Boom! Gravity.
Science.
- [meowing]
- Oh, boy.
[squeaks]
OK, students.
Whose project caused
those potatoes to mutate?
Well, then, I guess
we'll never know
who solved the school's
food shortage,
- and won first place.
- Right here.
Why do we have to
clean this up?
Well, I mean, it was
our science project
that turned
those innocent potatoes
into rampaging psycho spuds.
Yeah. Guess that's
what we get for handing in
someone else's fart box
as our project.
Hey, Howard. We learned
a valuable lesson today.
[both laughing]
Oh, valuable lesson.
Where did you
come up with that?
I don't know. I mean,
it's a gift, it's a gift.
- [farting]
- [Randy] Please tell me
that was the box.
[Howard] Wish I could, buddy.
Wish I could.