Queer as Folk (2000–2005): Season 2, Episode 18 - Episode #2.18 - full transcript

ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR...

ONE, TWO, THREE,
FOUR, FIVE, SIX.

SHAKE IT, DUDE.

[ ?????? ]

[ ?????? ]

[ Gasps of passion ]

[ ?????? ]

YOU'RE BACK.

[ Dropping of bags ]
YOU NOTICED.

[ Panting ]

[ ?????? ]



WHAT'S THAT?

OH, IT'SMOMO.

TIBETAN
FOR DUMPLING,
DUMPLING.

OH, IT'S...
IT'S SPICY.

OH-HO, COME ON,
YOU SISSY.

MY WESTERN PENNSYLVANIA
TASTE BUDS AREN'T
USED TO...

FAR EASTERN
CUISINE.

WELL, IT IS
GOOD FOR YOU.

MAKES YOU SWEAT.
GETS ALL THE
TOXINS OUT.

MMMM. I CAN
THINK OF...

OTHER WAYS I'D
RATHER SWEAT.

MMM.
HMMMM.

NOW SEE,
IT'S TOO HOT
FOR YOU NOW.

NO, NO, THE
KISS WAS FINE.



BEN?
[ Exhaling ]

JEEZ, MAYBE...
MAYBE IT IS A
LITTLE TOO SPICY.

I WAS...

WAIT, YOU DON'T
DOUBLE OVER FROM
A DUMPLING.

NO, NO, NO, IT'S
JUST... FORGET
IT, IT'S NOTHING.

HA-A-A-AH.

SEE? THERE.

IT'S ALL
BETTER.

WELL, MAYBE YOU
SHOULD EAT SOME-
THING A LITTLE
LESS EXOTIC.

OH, PLEASE, THE MONKS
IN THE MONASTERIES

HAVE BEEN
EATING IT
FOR CENTURIES.

YOU'RE NOT A
MONK. I CAN
VOUCH FOR THAT.

NO, BUT I WOULD
LIKE TO LIVE
THERE SOMEDAY.

WHAT? YOU DON'T
GET ENOUGH HOT
MALE ACTION HERE?

[ Chuckling ]

YOU KNOW WHAT
I MEAN; STUDY
BUDDHISM, MEDITATE.

YEAH. SEND ME
A POSTCARD.

ARE YOU READY?

[ Sniffing/
clearing of throat ]

YEAH, I JUST
GOTTA DO
ONE THING.

[ Clearing
of throat ]

HI, PASQUALE'S?

YEAH, I'D
LIKE A LARGE
PEPPERONI,

DOUBLE CHEESE...

AND THANK YOU
VERY MUCH.

GEORGE LEFT THE
MONEY TO ME,

IN MY NAME,
IN MY ACCOUNT.

HOW CAN THEY JUST
TAKE IT AWAY?

HAVING LOOKED
AT THE JUDGE'S
TEMPORARY INJUNCTION,

IT IS MY CONSIDERED
OPINION THAT...

YOU'RE SCREWED.

EX...CUSE ME?

IT'S JUST ONE OF THOSE
VAGUE LEGAL TERMS

THAT LAWYERS USE TO
COVER THEIR ASSES.

WHAT EXACTLY DO YOU
MEAN BY SCREWED?

UH, PERMIT ME TO
CLARIFY. "FUCKED".

THE SCHICKEL
FAMILY ATTORNEYS

ARE GOING TO
DO EVERYTHING IN
THEIR POWER TO
PROVE THAT YOU

MANIPULATED GEORGE INTO
GIVING YOU THAT MONEY.

THAT'S NOT TRUE.

HONEY, THE TRUTH
HAS AS MUCH TO
DO WITH LAW

AS GAY MEN
HAVE TO DO
WITH LESBIANS.

PRESENT COMPANY
EXCEPTED,
OF COURSE.

THEY'RE GOING TO
SAY YOU ORCHESTRATED
THE WHOLE THING.

EMMETT CAN'T PLAY
"MARY HAD A LITTLE
LAMB" ON A KAZOO.

HOW'S HE GOING
TO ORCHESTRATE
FINAGLING GEORGE
OUT OF MILLIONS?

BY PLAYING UPON
THE DIMINISHED
CAPACITIES OF A
LONELY OLD MAN.

SO WHAT ARE YOU
SAYING? HE SHOULD
JUST GIVE UP,

FORGET ABOUT
THE MONEY?
FUCK THAT!

TH-THAT 10,000,000
BELONGED TO EMMETT.

A-AND WHAT ABOUT THE
GIFTS I BOUGHT YOU?

YOUR CAR, YOUR
SEATS AT THE OPERA,

YOUR... DIAMOND
BRACELET?

THEY'LL HAVE TO CUT
OFF MY ARM FIRST.

Melanie:
I'M SURE THEY'D
BE DELIGHTED,

AND THEN SEND
YOU THE BILL.

[ Heavy sigh ]

"FRAWLEY'S OPEN
FIRE". I-I...

YOU KNOW, I
THOUGHT WE WERE
GOING FOR THE
HIGH-END ACCOUNTS.

THIS ISN'T
EVEN LOW-END,
IT'S BACK-END.

THEY'VE GOT 1,200
STEAK HOUSES

THROUGHOUT
THE MIDWEST
AND THE SOUTH.

1,200.
[ Scoffing ]

YEAH, WHAT
ABOUT THIS NAME,
"OPEN FIRE"?

WHAT DO YOU DO?
SHOOT THE COW,
THEN EAT IT?

THEY ARE TRYING

TO CHANGE
THEIR IMAGE.

AH. HOW ABOUT THIS?

"GO OUT OF BUSINESS."

WELL, WE DON'T TELL
POTENTIAL CLIENTS

TO TAKE A HIKE.
HMM, NOT IN
THIS MARKET.

AND NOT WITH
WHAT YOU'RE
MAKING...

PARTNER.
HUH.

HOW LONG DO I HAVE?

AH-H,
TOMORROW.
WHAT?

COME ON, YOU
CAN DO IT.

YOU'RE THE
MIRACLE WORKER.

THIS WILL TAKE MORE
THAN A MIRACLE.

IT'LL TAKE DIVINE
INTERVENTION.

EVERY NIGHT I
WOULD GO BACK
TO THE ROOM,

HOPING THAT
HE'D SURPRISE
ME AND SHOW UP.

HE NEVER DID.
HE NEVER EVEN
CALLED.

HE MUST HAVE
BEEN PISSED.
I MEAN...

JUST TAKING
OFF LIKE THAT.

YOU DIDN'T
EVEN TELL HIM
YOU WERE GOING.

I NEVER SAID
I WASN'T GOING.

HE'S THE ONE
THAT CANCELLED
ON ME.

NOW YOU KNOW
HOW OUR MOMS FEEL

WHEN OUR DADS
CALL FROM
THE OFFICE;

"OH, SORRY,
HONEY, CAN'T
MAKE IT."

I'M NOT SOME
GODDAMNED HOUSEWIFE.

[ Violin ?????? ]

THAT GUY'S
PRETTY GOOD.

Justin:
YEAH, HE GOES
TO MY SCHOOL.

I SAW HIM
PLAY ONCE.

[ Dropping of coins ]
THANK YOU.

HIS EYES. WOW!

ANYWAYS, GOTTA
GO TO BIOLOGY.

VERY GOOD.

[ Applause ]
BRAVO!

"LE TAMBOURIN CHINOIS"

FOR SOLO VIOLIN,

CONSIDERED BY MANY
TO BE ONE OF THE MOST
BEAUTIFUL PIECES

EVER WRITTEN
FOR THE STRINGS.

THANK YOU.

WHY ARE YOU PLAYING IT
ON A STREET CORNER?

I NEED THE CASH.

THERE'S GOTTA BE
AN EASIER WAY.

WELL, YEAH, I GUESS
I COULD ALWAYS
BE A GO-GO BOY.

[ Humming ]

I WOULDN'T
RECOMMEND THAT.

THEN I'LL STICK
TO THE FIDDLE.

YOU ARE
PRETTY GOOD.

[ Chuckle ]
PRETTY GOOD?

I'M A GENIUS.

YOU'RE ALSO NOT
VERY MODEST.

WELL, THEY'VE ONLY
BEEN TELLING ME THAT

SINCE I WAS
SIX, SO, UH...

SOONER OR LATER, I WAS
BOUND TO BELIEVE IT.

80 BUCKS.
NOT TOO BAD.

YOU KNOW,
CONSIDERING
IT'S NOT REALLY
ME PLAYING.

IT COMES
THROUGH ME,

FROM SOME-
PLACE ELSE.

IT'S AMAZING THAT
YOU SAID THAT.

WHEN I DRAW,
IT FEELS
THE SAME WAY.

HEY, CHECK
IT OUT.

Justin:
THE GARBAGE
TRUCK?

Ethan:
NO, NO, NO,
THE COUCH.

IT'S A PIECE
OF SHIT.

YEAH?

WELL, ONE MAN'S
PIECE OF SHIT

IS ANOTHER MAN'S
LIVING ROOM.

COME ON.

HEY!

HEY, GUYS WITH
THE COUCH?

HEY, LISTEN...
TONY, THESE GUYS
WANNA BUY THIS...

LET ME TAKE THIS
COUCH OFF YOUR
HANDS, HUH?
HOW ABOUT IT?

THANKS.

YOU LIVE CLOSE?
Ethan:
YEAH.

George: [ On videotape ]
DID YOU RECEIVE
MY LITTLE GIFT?

YOU ALWAYS SAY,
"FUCK 'EM ALL."

WELL, TO DO THAT,
YOU'VE GOT TO HAVE
"FUCK 'EM ALL" MONEY.

Lawyer:
VERY INTER-
ESTING VIDEO.

I'D GIVE IT
FOUR STARS.

GOOD CAMERA WORK.

EXCELLENT SOUND QUALITY.

HOWEVER,

I DIDN'T FIND
MR. SCHICKEL'S
PERFORMANCE

PARTICULARLY CONVINCING.

PERFORMANCE?

GEORGE MEANT EVERY
WORD HE SAID.

EVERY WORD HE
WAS TOLD TO SAY.

GEORGE SCHICKEL WAS
NOT COERCED INTO
MAKING THIS TAPE.

IT'S QUITE
CLEAR HE WAS
OF SOUND MIND.

AND SOUND
BODY TOO.

Lawyer:
WHAT'S CLEAR

IS THAT GEORGE SCHICKEL
WAS A CONFUSED

AND LONELY OLD MAN

WHO WAS SEDUCED BY
THE SEXUAL ADVANCES

OF AN AMBITIOUS
YOUNG HUSTLER

HE MET ON
A PORN SITE.

HEY, I LOVED GEORGE.

AND HE LOVED ME.

THEN WHY DID YOU
PERSUADE HIM TO TAKE YOU

ON A ROUND-THE-WORLD TOUR

KNOWING IT WOULD
ENDANGER HIS HEALTH?

I D... I DIDN'T FORCE...

HE'S THE ONE
WHO WANTED TO GO.

BUT, BEFORE YOU LEFT,
YOU CONVINCED HIM

TO DEPOSIT $10,000,000
INTO YOUR BANK ACCOUNT,

IN CASE SOMETHING
SHOULD HAPPEN?

DO YOU REALLY BELIEVE
A JUDGE AND JURY

WILL THINK OTHERWISE
ONCE THEY VIEW THIS?

I CAN'T
ANSWER THAT,

SINCE I DON'T PLAN
ON PRESENTING IT
AS COURT EVIDENCE.

I INTEND TO RELEASE
IT TO THE PRESS.

SO THAT PEOPLE
WILL SEE THAT
MR. HONEYCUTT

IS BEING DENIED
THE RECOGNITION
AND THE LEGACY

OF A LEGITIMATE,
LOVING RELATIONSHIP.

BUT, WHATEVER
THE OUTCOME,

ONCE THE PUBLIC TAKES
A LOOK AT THIS...

[ Chuckling ]
THEY'LL NEVER THINK
OF A SCHICKEL'S PICKLE

IN THE SAME WAY AGAIN.

Ben:
WALTER HORATIO PATER,

THE ENGLISH ESSAYIST
AND CRITIC,

WAS PERHAPS THE MOST
INFLUENTIAL PROPONENT OF
VICTORIAN AESTHETICISM.

THAT'S THE PHILOSOPHY
THAT TEACHES "ART
FOR ART'S SAKE".

NOW, HE BELIEVED
THAT PLEASURE
DERIVED FROM BEAUTY

IS THE HIGHEST IDEAL
TO WHICH MAN CAN ASPIRE.

NOW HIS MOST
FAMOUS DISCIPLE
WAS OSCAR WILDE...

[ Gasping ]

MR... MR. BRUCKNER,

ARE YOU
ALL RIGHT?

MMM. REALLY, I'M FINE.

THANK YOU.

OKAY, UH...

WILDE CHOSE TO
PURSUE PASSION, TO...

SEIZE THE MOMENT WITHOUT
REGARD TO CONSEQUENCE.

[ Panting ]

"TO BURN ALWAYS WITH
THIS GEM-LIKE FLAME,

TO MAINTAIN
THIS ECSTASY..."

[ Gasping ]

Students:
[ Murmurs of concern ]

Student:
MR. BRUCKNER...

MR. BRUCKNER,
ARE YOU OKAY?

SOMEBODY GET
A DOCTOR.

[ Confused chatter ]

GET A DOCTOR!

[ Panting ]
WHY DIDN'T
YOU TELL ME

YOU LIVED ON
THE TOP FLOOR?

[ Chuckling ]
WELL, IF I HAD,

YOU WOULD NOT
HAVE HELPED ME.
YEAH.

[ Gasps of effort ]

[ Groans of relief ]

THIS IS A REALLY
COOL PLACE.
THANKS. UM...

I FOUND PRACTICALLY
EVERYTHING IN IT
ON THE STREET,

INCLUDING
WOLFRAM.

WOLFRAM?

IS HE YOUR BOYFRIEND?

YEAH. YOU WANT
TO MEET HIM?

YEAH.

SAY HELLO TO
WOLFRAM VON ESCHENBACH.

OH-HO.
OH, REALLY.
[ Chuckling ]

[ Chuckle ]
WOLFRAM.

HE'S CONSIDERED
BY MANY TO BE
GERMANY'S
GREATEST POET.

THAT'S AN AWFULLY
FANCY NAME

FOR A PUSSY.

[ Chuckle ]
[ Meowing ]

WAGNER USED HIS MOST
FAMOUS EPIC "PARZIVAL"

AS THE BASIS
FOR HIS OPERA.

OH-H...

I WISH I HAD A
CAT LIKE YOU.

SO GET ONE.

YEAH.

MY BOYFRIEND WOULD
HAVE A SHIT-FIT.

MMM, THE ONE WHO DOESN'T
BELIEVE IN BIRTHDAYS?

HE'S GOT AN AMAZING LOFT,

RIGHT OUT OF
"ARCHITECTURAL DIGEST".

EVERYTHING IN
IT IS ITALIAN.

IT COSTS
A FORTUNE.

OBVIOUSLY HE'S NOT
ON SCHOLARSHIP.

NO, HE'S 31.

HE'S GOT A GREAT JOB.

OH-HO. AN OLDER MAN.

HMM. BETTER NOT
LET HIM HEAR
YOU SAY THAT.

SO YOU GUYS
LIVE TOGETHER?

YEAH.

WELL, LUCKY HIM.

HE'S GOT A
GREAT JOB,

A GREAT PLACE
FULL OF...

BEAUTIFUL THINGS.

[ Snorting ]
YOU...

I SHOULD GO.
I HAVE A CLASS.

ALL RIGHT.

[ Clearing
of throat ]

YEAH, I HAVE
TO, UH...

I HAVE TO PRACTICE,
PRACTICE, PRACTICE.

ALL RIGHT.

[ Yawning ]

BUT THANKS FOR
HELPING ME OUT.

I'LL... I'LL...

I'LL SEE YOU AROUND?

UH...

I HAVE SOME STUFF IN THE
STUDENT ART FAIR. IF...

YOU HAVE TIME.

OKAY.

Wolfram:
[ Meowing ]

[ Descending footsteps ]

HE SAID I WAS NOTHING
MORE THAN A HUSTLER,

A TRAMP.

Ted:
THOSE LYING
SONS OF BITCHES.

YOU'RE AN
AWARD WINNER.

WELL, NOT TO
WORRY. IF ANYBODY
CAN CHEW THEIR
BALLS OFF

AND SPIT THEM OUT,
IT'S MELANIE.

SHE, UH, SHE TOLD THEM

SHE'S GOING TO
RELEASE GEORGE'S
VIDEO TO THE PRESS.

BRILLIANT.

WELL, THAT
SHOULD CREATE
QUITE A SCANDAL.

A SCANDAL?

YEAH. I MEAN,
YOU THINK A
MULTI-BILLION
DOLLAR COMPANY

LIKE SCHICKEL'S
PICKLES WANTS
EVERY GUY

WHO BUYS A FRANK
WITH RELISH AT
A BASEBALL GAME,

EVERY KID
AT A PICNIC,

EVERY PREGNANT
WOMAN WITH A
SUDDEN CRAVING

KNOWING ABOUT
YOU AND GEORGE?

[ Ringing of telephone ]

THAT MONEY IS
PRACTICALLY YOURS.

I SAY WE GO GET
SOME DINNER...

CELEBRATE.
[ Chuckling ]

YEAH. AS SOON AS
BEN GETS HERE.

HELLO?

YES.

DO YOU REALLY
THINK IT'S GOING
TO BE OKAY?
YEAH.

HMM.
YEAH. LET'S GO.

YEAH, I'LL BE...
I'LL BE RIGHT THERE.

SO, WHAT YOU
IN THE MOOD FOR?
STEAK OR LOBSTER?

Emmett:
MICHAEL?

[ Sliding of door ]

YOU'RE
HOME LATE.

I GOT A
NEW ACCOUNT.

THAT'S NICE.

[ Deep voice ]
HOW WAS YOUR
DAY, JUSTIN?

FUCKING ONE
DAY... TO DO A
PRESENTATION.

[ Little voice ]
IT WAS NOT BAD.
THANKS FOR ASKING.

HOW WAS YOURS?

[ Deep voice ]
WHOLE LOT BETTER NOW
THAT I'M WITH YOU.

A FUCKING
STEAK HOUSE.

AND I'M SUPPOSED
TO BE BRILLIANT.

DID YOU
MISS ME?

[ Scoffing ]

[ Deep voice ]
EVERY MINUTE
YOU WERE AWAY.

YOU'RE ALL I
THOUGHT ABOUT.

PLEASE NEVER
LEAVE ME AGAIN.

WHO THE FUCK ARE
YOU TALKING TO?

NO ONE.
AND...

WHAT'S WITH THE
LITTLE VOICE?

ARE YOU...
PLANNING...

TO BECOME A
VENTRILOQUIST?

IT'S ONE WAY TO
HEAR WHAT YOU WANT.
HMMM.

SO HOW WAS
YOUR TRIP?

NOT MUCH FUN
WITHOUT YOU.

WHY DIDN'T YOU
TELL ME YOU
WERE GOING?

I DIDN'T THINK
YOU'D CARE.

Brian:
THERE WERE THINGS
I HAD TO DO.

DID YOU MISS ME?

[ Deep sigh ]

?? GOT A GREEN LIGHT,
GOT A GREEN LIGHT, YEAH ??

?? BUT I'M GOING NOWHERE ??

?? GOT A GREEN LIGHT,
GOT A RED LIGHT ??

?? YEAH, NO COP WILL STOP
I DON'T CARE ??

?? EVERY ONE OF YOU
COULD BE THE SAME ??

?? EVERY ONE OF YOU
COULD PLAY THE GAME ??

?? GOT A GREEN LIGHT,
GOT A GREEN LIGHT, YEAH ??

?? BUT YOU'RE
GOING NOWHERE ??

?? YOU KNOW THE BEST
THINGS IN LIFE ??

?? AREN'T FREE ??

?? YOU KNOW THE BEST
THINGS IN LIFE... ??

BEN, YOU OKAY?

[ Laboured
breathing ]

WHAT'S WRONG WITH
HIM, DOCTOR?

ACUTE
PANCREATITIS.

PROBABLY HAS
TO DO WITH HIS
HIV REGIMEN.

W-WELL, HIS
VIRAL LOAD WAS
UP AND HIS...

HIS T-CELLS
WERE DOWN.

THAT'S WHY HIS
DOCTOR CHANGED
HIS MEDICATION.

WELL, HE APPEARS
TO HAVE HAD A NEAR-
FATAL REACTION.

WELL, IS HE
GOING TO BE OKAY?

IT DEPENDS IF
WE CAN GET HIS
ENZYME ELEVATION
BACK DOWN.

RIGHT NOW IT'S
EXTREMELY HIGH.

WELL, HOW LONG
BEFORE YOU KNOW?

THE NEXT COUPLE
OF DAYS ARE GOING
TO BE CRITICAL.

WE'LL KEEP
HIM ON I.V.,
NORMAL SALINE

AND OFF HIS
MEDS. WE'LL SEE
HOW HE DOES.

THANKS,
DOCTOR. UM...

IS THERE ANY WAY
I COULD STAY WITH
HIM TONIGHT?

ARE YOU A
FAMILY MEMBER?

I'M HIS LOVER.

I'LL HAVE AN
ATTENDANT BRING
YOU A BLANKET
AND A PILLOW.

THANK YOU.

OKAY, I'LL,
UH, I'LL MAKE
HIS MEALS.

SINCE WHEN
DO YOU KNOW
HOW TO COOK?

UH, WE'LL MAKE
THE MEALS.

Ted:
WITH EVERYTHING
GOING ON AT
YOUR HOUSE?

WHAT?
WITH THE RENO-
VATIONS AND ALL.

Ted:
LOOK, I'LL JUST
ORDER THE MEALS.

UH, THEN, UM, I'LL LOOK,
UH, AFTER THE SHOP.

YOU DON'T KNOW
ANYTHING ABOUT
COMIC BOOKS.

I'M FAMILIAR WITH
PRACTICALLY HIS
ENTIRE INVENTORY.

I'LL LOOK AFTER
THE STORE.

OKAY, THEN, UH, YOU
KNOW WHAT? I WILL, UH,

I WILL PACK HIM A NICE
LITTLE OVERNIGHT BAG

WITH SOME OF
HIS THINGS, UM,

RAZOR, TOOTHPASTE,
CHANGE OF UNDIES.

DID IT.

THEN HOW ABOUT
FABULOUS FLORAL
ARRANGEMENTS

SENT TO BEN'S
ROOM DAILY?

WHAT THE FUCK DOES
HE WANT WITH FLORAL
ARRANGEMENTS?

HE'S UNCON-
SCIOUS.
OKAY.

WELL, THERE
MUST BE SOME-
THING I CAN DO.

[ Clearing
of throat ]

BOIL WATER.
HE'S NOT
PREGNANT.

I WANT SOME
COFFEE.

HEY.

POOR BABY, YOU
LOOK EXHAUSTED.

Ted:
MICHAEL, HOW'S
BEN'S FEVER?

IS BEN ALL RIGHT?
DID THE DOCTOR
SAY ANYTHING?

Justin:
IS HE GOING
TO BE OKAY?

THEY DON'T KNOW.

SWEETIE, COME...
COME SIT DOWN.

I'LL MAKE YOU
SOME COFFEE.

I HAVEN'T GOT TIME.
I GOTTA GET BACK
TO THE HOSPITAL.

Emmett:
UH, HON...
HONEY...

[ Closing of door ]

YOUR ROOM IS
A SHIT-HOLE.

I CAN'T FIND
MY BLACK JEANS.

THEY'RE IN
YOUR HAND.

DID YOU CALL
YOUR MOM?
NO.

I CALLED VIC.

WELL, DON'T
YOU THINK...

NO, I DON'T THINK.

SHE'D JUST GIVE ME SHIT.

I DON'T NEED A BUNCH
OF SHIT RIGHT NOW.

YOU SHOULD TAKE A NAP.

I CAN'T.

I... WHERE'S
MY BLUE SHIRT?

YOU'RE
WEARING IT.

HEY, YOU DON'T
HAVE TO BE BRAVE
ON ACCOUNT OF ME.

ON ACCOUNT OF
YOU? WHO'S...

WHO THE HELL'S
THINKING ABOUT YOU?

I'M THINKING
ABOUT BEN.

HE COULD DIE.

THEN YOU SHOULD
LET US HELP YOU.

I DON'T NEED
ANY HELP.

I CAN DO
IT MYSELF.

YOU REALLY
OUGHT TO SAVE
THE HERO SHIT

FOR THE GODDAMN
COMIC BOOKS.

IT'S NOT
HERO SHIT.

I CAN TAKE
CARE OF MYSELF,

AND BEN, AND I
DON'T NEED YOU

OR ANYONE ELSE COMING
TO RESCUE ME.

I'M DOING
JUST FINE.

GOOD FOR YOU.

NOW WHAT THE HELL DID
I DO WITH MY WALLET?

Daphne:
YOUR STUFF IS
BY FAR THE BEST.

Justin:
YOU'RE JUST SAYING THAT
BECAUSE WE'RE FRIENDS,

AND BECAUSE YOU
DON'T KNOW SHIT
ABOUT ART.

NOW THAT'S
NOT TRUE.

STOP BEING SUCH A
DEFENSIVE ASSHOLE

AND TAKE THE
COMPLIMENT.

Ethan:
SHE'S RIGHT.

YOUR STUFF IS THE
BEST, SO ADMIT IT,
YOU'RE BRILLIANT.

HUH. I'M
BRILLIANT.

GOOD.
THAT'S BETTER.

THAT'S THE GUY
WHO WAS PLAYING
THE VIOLIN.

REALLY?
HUH.

YOU KNOW,
FOR AN ARTIST,

YOU SURE DON'T
SEE VERY WELL.

WHO'S SHE?
SHE'S A FRIEND
FROM HIGH SCHOOL.

HOW MUCH YOU WANT
FOR THIS ONE?

MMM, THREE.

HUNDRED?
MILLION.

YOU SAID I WAS BRILLIANT.

THEN YOU'RE SELLING
YOURSELF SHORT.
ASK FOR FIVE.

FIVE.
SOLD.

[ Rustling of money ]

IT'S YOURS...

FOR A SONG.

YOU DRIVE A HARD BARGAIN.

WHY DON'T YOU COME OVER
LATER AND COLLECT IT?

Students:
[ Mixed chatter ]

[ Sighing ]

[ Mixed chatter ]

Man:
HOW 'BOUT A
SMILE, DEB?

HEY, HONEY.

DON'T COUNT ON
ME FOR DINNER,
ALL RIGHT?

I'M TAKING OVER
BETTY'S SHIFT.

IT'S A DAMNED
GOOD THING WE
GOT OUR FLU SHOTS

'CAUSE EVERY-
BODY'S SICK.

BEN'S IN THE HOSPITAL.

WHAT?

JESUS.

IS IT...

PANCREATITIS.

FROM THE MEDS.
PROBABLY THE VIDEX.

THAT'D BE MY GUESS.

HOW'S HE DOING?

MICHAEL SAYS NOT SO GOOD.

WHEN DID
HE CALL?
LAST NIGHT.

AND WHEN THE HELL
WERE YOU PLANNING
ON TELLING ME?

HE DIDN'T WANT
YOU TO KNOW.

I'M HIS GODDAMNED
MOTHER, FOR
CHRIST'S SAKE.

IS MY SON ALL RIGHT?

HE'S PUTTING UP
A BRAVE FRONT,

BUT IT'S TOUGH.

[ Ringing of bell ]

Man:
DEB, YOUR
EGGS ARE UP.

I TOLD HIM THIS WOULD
HAPPEN, DIDN'T I?

I TOLD HIM.
RIGHT AGAIN.

CONGRATULATIONS.

Woman: [ On P.A. ]
DR. LAO, REPORT TO NURSES'
STATION, SECOND FLOOR.

DR. LAO, NURSES'
STATION, SECOND FLOOR.

HI, CUTIE.

HOW ARE YOU FEELING?

WONDERFUL.

YOU LOOK SO SEXY
IN YOUR LITTLE GOWN.

[ Snorting ]

YOU WANT SOME
CRUSHED ICE?

THEY SAID
IT WOULD HELP
WITH THE FEVER.

MM... HMM.

I NEVER THOUGHT I'D
END UP HERE SO SOON.

YOU HAVEN'T
"ENDED UP HERE".

YOU'LL BE OUT
IN A DAY OR TWO.
OH-HO-HO.

I'VE SEEN WHAT HAPPENS.

FROM NOW ON, IT'S
BACK AND FORTH,
TRIP AFTER TRIP.

THE ONLY TRIP
YOU'LL BE TAKING

IS TO TIBET.

I'VE ALREADY
BOOKED US INTO THE
KATHMANDU HILTON.

THEY'VE... THEY'VE
GOT THIS GREAT
PACKAGE DEAL.

IT'S 10 BUCKS A
DAY AND ALL THE
YAK YOU CAN EAT.

OH, DON'T
MAKE ME LAUGH.

Nurse:
TIME FOR HIS
MEDICATION.

[ Whispering ]
WAIT, CAN YOU COME
BACK A LITTLE LATER?

HE... HE JUST
FELL ASLEEP.
SORRY.

MR. BRUCKNER?
HE NEEDS
HIS REST.

AND I HAVE MY
ORDERS. HE'S
SUPPOSED TO
TAKE THIS.

WHAT IS IT?
HIS HIV
MEDICATION.

WAIT. WHO PRESCRIBED IT?

THE DOCTOR
ON CALL.

WELL, THE DOCTOR
WHO ADMITTED HIM

SAID HE WANTED HIM
OFF ALL MEDICATION.

TH... THIS IS WHAT
PRACTICALLY KILLED HIM.

LOOK, I DON'T TAKE
MY ORDERS FROM YOU,

OKAY?
THAT'S WHAT YOU THINK.

IF YOU GIVE HIM
THIS, HE'LL DIE.

I'M GETTING
A DOCTOR.

WELL, WHILE YOU'RE
AT IT, WHY DON'T
YOU GET A BRAIN?

THEY ARRIVED FROM
LOUISVILLE THIS MORNING.

ON A BUS?

JESUS, LOOK AT
THOSE LAPELS.

THEY DIDN'T
COME FOR NO
FASHION SHOW.

I EXPECT YOU TO
TREAT THEM WITH
THE SAME RESPECT

AND COURTESY
YOU WOULD ANY
HUMAN BEING...

WITH A $30,000,000
ACCOUNT.

JESUS, YOU HAD ME
WORRIED THERE FOR
A SECOND, GARDNER.

GET YOUR ASS
IN HERE AND
SIGN 'EM UP.

Gardner:
AH, MR. FRAWLEY,

LOVELY TO SEE
YOU AGAIN.
[ Ringing of cell phone ]

[ Mixed greetings ]
[ Ringing of cell phone ]

PLEASE, PLEASE...
[ Mixed chatter ]

WHAT'S UP?
...DISCUSSING
TODAY. UM...

Frawley:
YEAH, DO YOU THINK
WE COULD GET THIS
MEETING GOING?

Gardner:
S... 'SCUSE ME
ONE SECOND.

I'LL BE... I'LL
BE RIGHT WITH YOU.

UH... SIT THERE.
DON'T MOVE.

I HAVE TO GO.

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING
ABOUT? WE HAVE A MEETING.

RESCHEDULE IT.

I HAVE THE
ENTIRE BOARD

OF FRAWLEY'S
OPEN FIRE
IN THERE.

WHAT AM I
SUPPOSED TO
DO WITH THEM?

ORDER THEM
A STEAK.

Man:
BOBBY, LUNCH IS
ON YOU THIS TIME.

[ Chuckles ]

Bobby:
I PAID THE
LAST TIME.

MY GRANDFATHER
TAUGHT ME
HOW TO PLAY.

HE WAS A
VIOLINIST FOR THE
BERLIN PHILHARMONIC

BEFORE THEY
THREW HIM INTO A
CONCENTRATION CAMP.

HOLY SHIT.
YEAH.

HE STILL
PRACTICED SIX
HOURS A DAY,

EVEN THOUGH
HE DIDN'T
HAVE A VIOLIN.

SO HOW DID HE?

BY THE TIME
HE GOT OUT OF
AUSCHWITZ,

HE SAID HIS
TECHNIQUE HAD
ACTUALLY IMPROVED;

THAT HIS, UH, PERFOR-
MANCE OF THE MENDELSSOHN
VIOLIN CONCERTO

WAS THE GREATEST
NEVER HEARD. HUH!

THAT'S AMAZING.
YEAH.

THE ONLY THING
THAT KEPT HIM GOING
WAS HIS MUSIC.

SOMETIMES I FEEL
THE SAME WAY.

I KNOW WHAT
YOU MEAN.

NO MATTER HOW
SHITTY THINGS GET,
I ALWAYS HAVE ART.

IT'S THE ONE PLACE
I CAN GO WHERE I'LL
ALWAYS BE SAFE.

I NEVER TOLD
ANYONE THAT
BEFORE.

REALLY?
YEAH.

NOT EVEN YOUR... RICH,
SUCCESSFUL BOYFRIEND?

NOT EVEN
HIM. NO.

OH-H-H.

SO...

DO YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND?

NO CHANGING
THE SUBJECT.

COME ON, I'M CURIOUS.
[ Chuckling ]

THERE WAS
THIS GUY.

YEAH?
YEAH.

AND I WAS...

SO FUCKING CRAZY
ABOUT HIM, I CAN...

I CAN'T
EXPLAIN IT.

YOU DON'T
HAVE TO.

WE WERE TOGETHER
FOR ABOUT A YEAR.

BUT HE LIKED TO GO
TO THE CLUBS AND...

PARTY AND BRING
GUYS HOME, AND...

FOR A WHILE, I
HAVE TO ADMIT, IT
WAS PRETTY EXCITING.

I SUPPOSE IT CAN BE.

BUT THEN I
REALIZED IT'S
NOT WHAT I WANT.

MMMM.

WHAT DO YOU WANT?

I WANT TO BE WITH
SOMEBODY WHO ONLY
WANTS TO BE WITH ME...

WHO DOESN'T
NEED TO SEE
OTHER PEOPLE...

OR BE IN THE SCENE
EVERY NIGHT.

I WANT TO BE
WITH SOMEBODY

WHO I CAN HAVE A PICNIC
ON THE FLOOR WITH,

AND TELL THINGS TO THAT
I'VE NEVER TOLD ANYBODY.

[ Chatter of P.A. ]

[ Sigh ]
I'M SORRY TO
CALL YOU. I...

I DIDN'T MEAN
TO BOTHER YOU.
SHUT UP.

HOW IS HE?

THEY'VE GOT HIM
ON ALL THOSE PAIN-
KILLERS AND SHIT.

THEY DON'T
EVEN KNOW IF...

[ Sobbing ]
HEY.

HEY, HEY, HEY,
HEY, HEY...

[ Sobbing ]

I DON'T WANT
HIM TO DIE.

HE'S NOT GOING
TO... HE'S NOT
GOING TO DIE.

HE'S NOT
GOING TO DIE.

[ Sobbing ]

I NEED TO
BE STRONG.
[ Sniffle ]

YOU ARE. YOU...
YOU ARE STRONG.

NO, I'M NOT.

MY MOM
WAS RIGHT. YOUR MOM DOESN'T
KNOW SHIT.

LISTEN TO ME.
LISTEN TO ME.
LISTEN TO ME.

ARE YOU
LISTENING?

I'M LISTENING.

THE NIGHT JUSTIN
WAS BASHED AND
I CALLED YOU,

AND YOU WERE
ABOUT TO GET
ON A PLANE,

AND YOU CAME HERE
AND YOU SAT WITH
ME FOR THREE DAYS,

WAITING TO SEE
IF HE WAS GOING
TO LIVE OR DIE.

IF IT HADN'T BEEN
FOR YOU, I... I NEVER
WOULD HAVE MADE IT.

IT WAS
BECAUSE OF YOU.

YOU'RE STRONG
ENOUGH FOR
BOTH OF US.

AND YOU'RE
GOING TO BE
STRONG FOR BEN.

[ Heavy sigh ]

$1,000,000?

$1,000,000.

$1,000,000.
THE FAMILY
WANTS TO SETTLE.

OH, YOU GOT 'EM.
OH! CONGRATS, MEL.

All:
[ Chuckling ]

YOU TOO, EM.
THANKS, BABY.

[ Whoop of triumph ]

OH! WE SURE
SHOWED THEM,
DIDN'T WE, MEL?

OH, WE SURE DID.

HOWEVER,
THERE ARE A FEW
STIPULATIONS.

STIPULATIONS?

OH, THAT WE NOT
RELEASE GEORGE'S
TAPE TO THE PRESS.

THAT'S UNDERSTANDABLE.

AND THAT YOU
SIGN THIS.

WHAT IS IT? HUH.

JUST A STATEMENT
THAT YOU AND
GEORGE NEVER HAD
A RELATIONSHIP,

AND THAT ANY
AFORESAID CLAIMS
TO THE CONTRARY

ARE FALSE
AND UNTRUE.

FORGET IT.

W-W-WHOA,
HOLD ON A
MINUTE THERE.

I MEAN, LET'S
NOT BE HASTY.

I MEAN, TRUE,
IT'S NOT THE FULL
$10,000,000,

BUT STILL, I MEAN,
Y-Y-YOU DON'T
TOSS OUT A TRICK

BECAUSE HE'S GOT
A GOOD BODY BUT
BAD ACNE, RIGHT?

LAST SATURDAY
NIGHT...
NEVER MIND.

LOOK, GEORGE
WANTED YOU TO BE
TAKEN CARE OF.

AFTER ALL, THAT'S
WHY HE LEFT
YOU THE MONEY.

BUT... TO DENY
WHAT WE HAD...
AS YOUR LAWYER,

I CAN'T ADVISE
YOU TO SIGN
SOMETHING

YOU KNOW
YOURSELF
ISN'T TRUE.

BUT AS YOUR
FRIEND, YOU
KNOW THE TRUTH.

WHAT YOU AND
GEORGE MEANT
TO EACH OTHER,

THAT'S ALL
THAT MATTERS.

THINK WHAT
YOU CAN DO
WITH THE MONEY.

YOU KNOW,
REAL ESTATE,
MUNI BONDS.

WITH THE PROPER
INVESTMENTS,

YOU COULD
BE SET...
SET FOR LIFE.

[ ?????? ]

WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?

IT'S A PICNIC.

A PICNIC.

I WENT TO THE
GOURMET SHOP

AND I GOT A
LOT OF COOL,
EXPENSIVE STUFF.

BRIE, PATE,
FRENCH BREAD...

MMMM.
MMMM.

NOW YOU KNOW I
DON'T EAT FAT...

OR CARBS
AFTER 7:00.

I KNOW, BUT...

I THOUGHT MAYBE
JUST THIS ONCE.

WE COULD DINE
ON THE FLOOR?

[ Chuckle ]

YEAH.

THIS IS PITTSBURGH,
NOT JAPAN.

OH, COME ON.

IT'LL BE
ROMANTIC.

[ Clearing
of throat ]

YOU KNOW, I
WANT TO GO OUT.

I'VE HAD A
FOR-SHIT DAY AND
I NEED TO UNWIND.

YOU CAN DO
THAT HERE.
WE CANNOT DO
THAT HERE.

NOW COME ON.

HOW ABOUT CHEESE
AND CRACKERS? I'LL
MAKE IT FOR YOU.

CHEESE AND CRACKERS
AREN'T GOING TO CUT IT.

NOW COME ON,
GET UP, GET DRESSED.

CAN WE PLEASE
STAY HOME,
FOR ONE NIGHT,

JUST THE TWO OF US?

YOU'RE TOO YOUNG
TO SETTLE DOWN.

YOU'RE TOO OLD
TO FUCK AROUND.

HMMM.

[ Chuckle ]

NOW, I'M GOING
TO BABYLON.

YOU CAN EITHER
COME WITH ME,

OR YOU CAN
STAY HERE.

IT'S YOUR CALL.

[ ?????? ]

[ Gasp of
exertion ]

[ Moan ]

[ ?????? ]

[ ?????? ]

THAT'S RIGHT, BOY.
EAT THE MEAT.

EAT THE MEAT.

HUH.

[ Gasping ]

[ ?????? ]

[ Mixed chatter ]

Ben:
DEBBIE?

BEN, I DIDN'T WANT
TO DISTURB YOU.

OH, NO, NO, IT'S
OKAY. I WAS JUST...

I WAS JUST RESTING.

I'M SORRY I DIDN'T
COME SOONER, I...

MICHAEL DIDN'T TELL ME.

YEAH, HE DIDN'T
WANT TO UPSET YOU.

I HAVE THE FEELING...

IT'S NOT ME HE WAS
WORRYING ABOUT.

OH...

I BROUGHT YOU SOME, UH...

HOME-MADE CHICKEN BROTH.

CURES ALL ILLS.

THANK YOU.

SO...

HOW... HOW ARE YOU?

OH, I'M, UH, BETTER.

I'M BETTER.

I'M SURE YOU'RE
GOING TO BE JUST FINE.

WELL, I DON'T WANT
TO WEAR YOU OUT.

WE ALL KNOW HOW
EXHAUSTING I CAN BE.

IF YOU SEE MICHAEL...

TELL HIM I SAID HELLO.

DEBBIE.

I'M REALLY SORRY...

FOR PUTTING HIM
THROUGH THIS.

MAYBE HE SHOULD'VE
LISTENED TO YOU.

TO ME?

WHAT THE FUCK DO I KNOW?

I'M...

JUST A CONTROLLING BITCH
WHO SHOULD'VE KEPT HER
BIG MOUTH SHUT, HMM?

YOU'RE HIS MOTHER.

YOU LOVE HIM, YOU'RE
TRYING TO PROTECT HIM.

WELL, I SUPPOSE
THERE ARE TWO WAYS
OF THINKING ABOUT IT.

I PREFER YOURS.

WOULD YOU LIKE TO
STAY FOR A WHILE?

I COULD USE SOME COMPANY.

SURE, I'LL JUST
HEAT THIS UP.

OH, I, UH...

NOT REALLY HUNGRY.

DON'T ARGUE WITH ME.
YOU'RE GONNA EAT IT.

Lawyer:
AH, EVERYTHING SEEMS
TO BE IN ORDER.

JUST THE FORMALITY OF
MR. HONEYCUTT'S SIGNATURE.

MRS. SCHICKEL WOULD
LIKE TO EXPRESS
HER GRATITUDE

FOR RESOLVING
THIS IN A QUIET AND
DIGNIFIED MANNER,

AS BEFITS HER LATE
HUSBAND'S MEMORY.

WELL, BE SURE AND
THANK MRS. SCHICKEL
FOR THANKING ME.

UM, BEFORE I SIGN,
MAY I SEE THE CHEQUE?

CERTAINLY.

I ALWAYS WONDERED WHAT
A CHEQUE FOR $1,000,000
WOULD LOOK LIKE.

AND NOW I KNOW.

A LOT OF ZEROES.

E-EMMETT...

Lawyer:
WHAT IS THIS?

ANOTHER DEVIOUS PLOY?

"B-BY AN AMBITIOUS
PORN SITE HUSTLER"?

NO, MR. WYLIE.
IT'S NOT A PLOY.

YOU SEE, I, UH, I MAY
NOT HAVE $1,000,000,
LIKE GEORGE,

BUT I DO HAVE THE TRUTH.

IT'S MY ONLY CURRENCY.

AND IT'S MY GIFT TO HIM.

Melanie:
EMMETT, YOU
DO REALIZE

WHAT YOU'RE
DOING?

I TOLD YOU, I NEVER
WANTED A PENNY FROM HIM.

YOU CAN TAKE EVERYTHING.

EVERY... CENT.

BUT THE ONE
THING I WON'T
LET YOU TAKE

IS WHAT GEORGE
AND I SHARED.

THAT'S MINE,

AND YOU CAN'T HAVE IT.

WELL, I GUESS
THAT CONCLUDES
OUR BUSINESS
HERE, GENTLEMEN.

Emmett:
OH,

ONE MORE THING.

[ Sigh ]

Brian:
YOU WANT TO LOSE
THE FAMILY CROWD,

THE STROLLERS
AND THE WALKERS,
AND GO FOR THE
YOUNG SINGLES?

WELL THEN, I HAVE
THREE WORDS FOR YOU.

"EAT THE MEAT"?

Various:
HOW'S THAT GOING...
IT'S CATCHY.

THIS IS WHAT YOU'VE
KEPT US WAITING FOR?

THERE ISN'T EVEN
A PICTURE OF A
STEAK ON THERE.

WELL, UNLESS YOU'VE
REDESIGNED IT,

PEOPLE KNOW WHAT A
T-BONE LOOKS LIKE.

AND WHERE'S THE NAME
OF OUR RESTAURANT?

WE ADD THAT IN THE SECOND
WAVE OF THE CAMPAIGN.

THERE'S ALSO, UH...

SOMETHING VAGUELY, UH...

SEXUAL ABOUT THAT.

Various:
[ Chuckles ]

LET'S HOPE YOUR
YOUNG SINGLES AGREE.

Frawley:
WHAT DO YOU GUYS
THINK ABOUT THIS?

Man:
I THINK
IT'S NICE.
WHAT?

YOU LIKE IT?

[ Excited chatter ]

SOGGING
BRILLIANT.

HOW DID YOU
THINK OF THAT?

IT JUST
CAME TO ME.

INSULIN'S
STABLE.

ENZYME LEVEL'S
BACK DOWN.

INFLAMMATION'S
SUBSIDED.

THAT'S GOOD NEWS.
[ Chuckling ]

SO, WHEN CAN
I GO HOME?

MAYBE TOMORROW. YOU
NEED TO STAY IN BED
FOR A FEW DAYS.

WELL, I'LL
CHAIN HIM TO
THE HEADBOARD.

HE'LL LIKE THAT.
[ Snorting ]

AND I WANT YOU
TO GO ON A HOLIDAY.

HOW ABOUT
TIBET?

Doctor:
A DRUG HOLIDAY.

ARE YOU SURE?

YOUR BODY COULD USE A
REST FOR A FEW MONTHS.

WE'LL KEEP
AN EYE ON YOU.

THANK YOU,
DOCTOR.

WELL, THAT'S
GOOD NEWS.

YOU GET TO GO.
YOU DON'T HAVE TO
BE ON THE MEDS.

MMMM. WE'LL SEE
WHAT HAPPENS.
HUH.

HEY.
MM-HMM?

HOW ABOUT STAYING
IN THE "NOW"?

[ Violin ?????? ]

[ Knocking on door ]

[ Banging on door ]

SHIT! THAT WAS GOOD.

SORRY.

OH, IT'S OKAY,
I WAS JUST...

I THOUGHT YOU WERE
MY ASSHOLE NEIGHBOURS.
THEY'RE ALWAYS...

COMPLAINING WHENEVER
I PLAY TOO LATE.

THEY COMPLAIN?
YEAH.

THEY'RE
FUCKING LUCKY.

WELL, I WISH
YOU'D TELL
THEM THAT.

SOMEDAY THEY'LL
BE PAYING 100 BUCKS
A TICKET TO HEAR ME.

SO I'M THE
LUCKY ONE.

I CAME FOR MY SONG.

RIGHT.

RIGHT.

SO WHAT WOULD
YOU LIKE TO HEAR?

SOMETHING...

TECHNICALLY
ASTONISHING?

[ Chuckling ]

NO. SOMETHING...

ASTONISHINGLY ROMANTIC.

[ "Meditation" from "Thais"
by Massenet ?????? ]

[ Dropping of bow ]

[ Setting down
of violin ]

[ ?????? ]

?? WHENEVER
I'M ALONE WITH YOU ??

?? YOU MAKE ME FEEL
LIKE I AM HOME AGAIN ??

?? WHENEVER
I'M ALONE WITH YOU ??

?? YOU MAKE ME FEEL
LIKE I AM WHOLE AGAIN ??

[ ?????? ]

?? WHENEVER
I'M ALONE WITH YOU ??

?? YOU MAKE ME FEEL
LIKE I AM YOUNG AGAIN ??

?? WHENEVER
I'M ALONE WITH YOU ??

?? YOU MAKE ME FEEL
LIKE I AM FUN AGAIN ??

?? HOWEVER FAR AWAY ??

?? I WILL ALWAYS
LOVE YOU ??

?? HOWEVER LONG I STAY ??

?? I WILL ALWAYS
LOVE YOU ??

?? WHATEVER WORDS I SAY ??

?? I WILL ALWAYS
LOVE YOU ??

?? I WILL ALWAYS
LOVE YOU ??

?? WHENEVER
I'M ALONE WITH YOU ??

?? YOU MAKE ME FEEL... ??

MOO!

?? HOWEVER FAR AWAY ??

?? I WILL ALWAYS
LOVE YOU ??