Project Mc² (2015–2017): Season 2, Episode 2 - No Laughing Matter - full transcript

The Quail allows the four girls to figure out this case. McKeyla becomes increasingly suspicious of Kyle, but soon dismisses the idea of him being Retro just because he knew she liked fro-yo and was wearing a black hoodie, very much like the one Retro wears. They also suspect Devon D'Marco, a troublemaker, as she spray-paints handcuffs on a picture of a drone on a poster about the upcoming launch. All four girls except Bry, who has to babysit, make ways to get detention on Saturday with Devon. Bry runs a vocal recognition as Cam and Adri confront the troublemaker and McKeyla looks through her bag. Devon is proven to be innocent, just using the school's 3D printer to make skulls for her nana's birthday.

[theme song playing]

[typing]

M, no matter how long you stare at it,

it's still going to say
"Property of Maywood Glen Academy."

Which means this Retro could be a student.

[McKeyla] A.D.I.S.N., can you run
a data check on Maywood Glen students

well-versed in computer science?

Maybe a list of Coding Club members?

[A.D.I.S.N.] Who you looking at?
You eyeballin' me?

Don't make me close the book on ya!

Great. The glitching is getting worse.



A.D.I.S.N. hasn't used that voice
since we were on assignment in Jersey.

Bry, how are you doing on that IP trace?

It looks like Retro routed his broadcast

through several IP addresses,
including Gino's Pizza.

This guy is good.

The man shows no mercy!

A horrible pic of me
with chimichurri sauce in my teeth

just got posted to the whole school.

Oh! Hashtag, embarrassing.

Nothing but sunny skies.
As you can see...

[Retro on TV]
But it looks like your weekend forecast

has taken a turn for the worse.

Looks like Retro
is taking this a step further.

[static crackling]



[Retro] So, Maywood Glen,

having fun
without your precious technology?

Uh, no! Obvi.

Well, get used to it!

All your little gadgets
are ruining society.

Now I plan on punishing those responsible.

They think it's about progress,
but they're wrong!

And when I'm done with them,
they'll be nothing but a laughingstock.

Break out your rain boots, Maywood Glen.

It's going to get stormy.

Adri's right.

Retro said the forecast is going to take
a turn for the worse this weekend.

I don't understand why anyone
would want to destroy our technology.

What did Snapchat ever do to this guy?

-What does he or she want?
-Sometimes nothing at all.

Whoa, a little heads-up next time?

Sorry.

Girls, this Retro fits
the classic profile of an anarchist.

Often a power-hungry outcast
with a personal vendetta against society.

Sometimes they want nothing
but to create chaos.

You need us back out there.
Let us go after this guy.

If this is a Maywood Glen student,
who better to investigate him?

We know the deets on everything at school.

Deets?

Details. Moms...

-Excuse me?
-Nothing, Quail... Sir... Ma'am.

Stop talking!

Quail, trust us.

This is the perfect mission
for us to get back out there.

[inhales deeply]

[sighs] Go.

♪ Go us! Go us! ♪

But remember, maintain your cover.

[softly] ♪ Go us! Go us! ♪

-Uh, guys, she means at school.
-[all three] Oh!

[loudly] ♪ Go us! ♪

♪ Go us! ♪

♪ Go us! Go us! ♪

Oh! Hey... [stammers] McKeyla!

You know,
I was actually just about to text you.

But, like, man, nothing's workin'.

Yeah, I noticed that. Nice hoodie.

Oh, yeah. Thank you.

Um, hey, so, I was wonderin',
uh, after our study session on Friday,

if you, like, wanted to grab
a slice of pizza?

Why?

Um... just 'cause, uh...

I'm not a big fan of Fish Stick Friday.

[chuckling] I mean, have you ever seen
a fish that looks like a stick?

Yeah, it's called
the Aulostomus chinensis,

otherwise known as the trumpetfish.

Okay. Um, well...
We could always just get fro-yo.

-Yeah, I love fro-yo.
-[chuckles]

How'd you know that?

Uh, 'cause most kids do?

[Kyle chuckles]

Uh, well, fro-yo it is.

Uh, I guess I'll see you Friday?

Well, that depends on the weather,
doesn't it, Kyle?

[stammering] Well...
rain or shine, I'll be there.

[chuckles] All right. Bye.

I mean, he was bombarding me
with questions about food.

He was asking about my time line...

and then, out of nowhere,
he knew I liked fro-yo!

Everybody loves fro-yo.

He was wearing a hoodie!

M, look around.

Okay... I guess we have
our work cut out for us.

[Justin] Hey, it's the camera.

'Cause that's what you're
gonna be doin' after the Tech Fair.

Snapping pictures of the winner.
[chuckles]

Which would be me!

-[both laughing]
-It's too late.

Hey, Justino, just wait until
you feast your eyes on

Cam's water-powered racing carmobile, Red!

[scoffs]

[both chuckle]

Before you say anything,
it's a working title!

[school bell ringing]

[Bry] O-M-G-sies.

Why is that DeMarco girl
leaning against my locker?

How am I gonna get her to move?

I have some homemade,
organic bunny-shaped marshmallows.

They can turn a frown upside down.

She doesn't strike me
as a bunny-shaped marshmallow kind of gal.

You talkin' about me?

Nope! Just talking about lockers.

They lock stuff inside them.
Well, you do. I'm assuming you do.

Not to accuse you of anything.
Although I am.

But what I'm really trying to say here is

I'm sure you know how lockers work.

Is she always like this?

It's kind of her thing.

It's annoying.

Who's the locker blocker?

DeMarco. Devon DeMarco.

She's a senior who transferred
from some fancy art school.

And she's not thrilled about it.

She makes us nervous.

[McKeyla scoffs] I got this.

Watch me work my social skills.

Hey, Dev...

...von.

Uh, I'm McKeyla, but my friends call me M.

So, uh, here's the thing.

You're kind of blocking
my friend's locker,

and she needs to get her books, so...

Go away.

I'll go when I'm ready to go.

She's ready. [chuckles]

You have a funny way
of making friends, chica.

She's leaving.

[Bry] Hey, what's she doing
with that spray paint?

[spray can hissing]

[Bry] So not cool!

She's tagging a poster
of Dr. Melissa Tuttle.

She's been involved in the development
of virtual reality,

cloud apps, you name it.

-Isn't she an alumni here?
-Only the greatest alumni ever!

She's launching the prototype
of a new drone this Saturday.

I've already got tix. It's gonna be epic!

Check it out.

It's gonna revolutionize
drone technology for the next gen.

She's like an awesome girl version
of Steve Jobs.

And DeMarco's painting handcuffs
on the new drone.

[Cam] Yeah, looks like she's trying
to make some kind of statement.

Like she wants to handcuff technology.

And the launch is Saturday.

When Retro said
things are taking a turn for the worse.

[spray can hissing]

I think we have our suspect.

Nice work, Picasso.

Defacing school property.
That's against the rules.

Detention Saturday.

[Devon] See ya there.

Save my seat.

Hmm... detention.

Hmm?

You want me to get detention on purpose?

[typing]

[sighs]

[sighs] Bobby, more homework, less hair.

Okay, but... you can't blame a guy
for trying to look his best

for a beautiful,
intelligent woman like yourself.

[sighs] Bobby, let me remind you... again.

I am way too old for you.

[Adri] How's it going?

Tutoring is starting to eat
into my spying time.

Tell me about it!

Not only do I have to get into detention,

but my abuela has me
making cakes of the solar system

for the planetarium grand opening.

I finished the geometry problems
you gave me, Bry.

Very good, Bobby. [sighs]

I think I mentioned earlier...

I go by Robert now.

If you look close,
I got a little 'stache coming in.

It is, trust me.

Whatever.

Well, nice work. I see improvement.

So do my parents.

That's why they wanna pay
for another tutoring sesh this Saturday.

[chuckling] This Saturday?
I can't. I have plans.

Yup, with me.

Not to worry. I got you a little raise
'cause you're worth it.

I'm only doing it
because I have to pay for my own data.

[Bobby] So you can text me!

[groans] Whatever.

-Sorry, Bry. There'll be more detentions.
-[sighs]

Ooh. Maybe I could still spy
while you guys are in detention.

I'll run a voice scan to see
if Devon's voice matches Retro's.

I'll just need something
that'll record Devon's voice.

-Then say hello to my little friend.
-[feedback]

We can use my NOV-Eight issued
lipstick recorder.

[Bry] Sweet!

Actually, it's sour apple.

A natural puckerant.

[smacks lips] Very puckery!

A little bit extra baking soda,
extra Epsom salt...

[fizzing]

...food coloring and glitter.

Because everything's better with glitter.

[fizzes]

And what do you get?

Super bath fizz!

But when you add a lot of this...

[fizzes]

...you get exploding bath fizz!

My ticket to detention.

And I'm going to give
Assistant Principal Wilson

a taste of my magic.

Something I picked up
on assignment in Vegas.

-[bird cooing]
-Do you hear a bird?

You mean... this bird?

[chuckling] Oh...

Your salted caramel donut is delicious,
Ms. Attoms.

Hmm, maybe... a tad salty.

-Then you should stay hydrated, hmm?
-Hmm.

[yells]

Oh... that's very cute.

You can tell all your friends about it
in detention Saturday! [grunts]

[softly] Yes!

[laughs]

[crowd murmuring]

Killed it.

You also killed your Saturday, hot dog.

I'll see you in detention.

Assistant Principal Wilson,
wanna see a magic trick?

Sure. But I dabble in magic, too,
so I'm not easy to impress.

Pick a card.

Now remember it and put it back.

Is it...

the nine of diamonds?

No, but good guess.

Well done, McAlister.

You might wanna hold the applause.

[bird cooing]

[cooing continues]

[Wilson yelling]

[gasping]

[laughs mockingly]

You like magic? Poof!
Your Saturday just disappeared.

I will see you in detention.

[school bell ringing]

Remember, in order for it to record,
I have to continuously apply it.

So get her to say something rápido.
Capisce?

[chuckles] Perf.

Now we just have to talk to her.

Emoji, frightened face. [gasps]

[Bry] Hey there, Dev...

...on.

Um, I'm Bryden and this is Adrienne.

Since we never formally met,
we figured we'd say hi.

Hopefully you'll say hi back.

And then I'll say something,
you'll say something,

and before you know it, a full-on convo.

Stop talking. Let her talk. [chuckles]

Um... so if you wanna say hi back,
uh, any "hi" will work.

[inhales deeply] Hello! Hey. 'Sup? Chello!

Your friend looks like a clown.

Who's the clown now? Hmph!

[both chuckle]

[Cam] Nothing suspicious yet.

If she's planning something
at Tuttle's launch tonight,

she's gotta make a move soon.

Then let's go to work.

We're going to track her every move.

Hey there, Dev...

...von.

So, I heard one of your brothers
is a mechanic.

We're building a water-powered car
for the Tech Fair,

so if he could spare any parts,
that'd be awesome!

What's in it for me?

Oh, really?

I was expecting a "no"
or a "get out of my face!"

But we'll work something out.
I'll get back to you.

Welcome to detention, rule-breakers.

All cell phones in the box,
and everybody, do your homework.

[all] Already did it.

Then do tomorrow's.

[all] Did that, too.

Then think about the homework you did.

DeMarco, I said homework, not doodling.

This is my art project.
I made it with homemade puff paint.

It's food coloring, flour,
salt and baking powder.

Adding water really makes it,
you know, puff.

-[sneezes]
-Oh! [groans]

Glitter [splutters] in my nose!

Oh! And in my contact.
Oh, that's great. Thank you.

I'm gonna need my glasses.
Nice one, De... [sneezes] DeMarco!

[continues sneezing]

Sketch.

Muy sketch.

If DeMarco really is Retro,

whatever she's planning
for Dr. Tuttle's launch tonight

she could be setting in motion right now!

We'll follow her.

And I'll check her stuff.

[blacklight tracker clicks]

[Cam] Good call on the blacklight tracker.

[Adri] This ultraviolet light
illuminates the chemicals

I sprayed on the bottom of her shoes.

[Bry] We'll soon know
if Devon's voice matches Retro.

[laptop chimes]

-Whoa.
-[Bobby] I know...

That's my cologne.

It's called Temptation.

-[fan whirrs]
-[coughing]

She snuck into the computer lab.

[Cam whispering] Look at her.

Probably doing more hacking.

[whispering] We've got you now,
Señorita Puffy Pants.

What did you just call me?

Puffy Pants?

We know what you're up to, DeMarco.

-Classic profile of an anarchist.
-A what?

Someone who likes to cause chaos.

-Still don't get the "puffy pants."
-[Cam] Doesn't matter.

You're going down for this.

[McKeyla] Let's see
what you got in here, DeMarco.

Hmm? [scoffs]

[sighs]

[A.D.I.S.N.] Woo! Where am I?

A.D.I.S.N., you're back!

[A.D.I.S.N.] I feel like somebody
hit my memory

over the head with a motherboard.

Did you miss me?

Of course.

-How much?
-A lot. [chuckles]

Like, a lot, a lot?

-[beeps]
-Just tell me who that was?

It's an IM from Bry. It says,
"Devon's voice does not match Retro's."

What are you talking about?

[Cam] You graffitied Dr. Tuttle's poster.
Explain that.

[Devon] Yeah, to get detention.
I'm an artist.

What, they gonna give me detention
for using the 3D printer during detention?

Say that again?

[sighs] I sneak in here
to do my personal art projects.

You did that?

-[sighs]
-That's awesome.

Yeah, it's for my nana. It's her birthday.

Are those for your nana, too?

The woman likes skulls.
Got a problem with that?

No, I think it's sweet.

Go back to your beautiful,
but strangely haunting art.

[all] Devon's not Retro! We know!

Glitter everywhere.

[sighing]

[grunts]

I love my job.

[sighs]

[groans]

Towel.

-[Adri whimpers]
-[steady beeping]

[sighs] We need to get back to detention.

Not before I figure out what Retro's
got planned for Tuttle's launch!

You mean like releasing
some kind of gas into the vents?

-Yes, exactly. Something like that.
-[beeping continues]

The gas is right beside me, isn't it?

[beeping continues]

It's N2O, nitrous oxide,
otherwise known as laughing gas.

That's what Retro must've meant by
"turning Dr. Tuttle into a laughingstock."

The vents must go
right into the auditorium.

That's not all.

Looks like Retro's rigged a transmitter
to send out a competing radio signal.

He's going to crash Tuttle's drone
during her launch.

Of course!

After Tuttle's epic fail, everyone
will be laughing at her from the gas.

Plus the press will be there.
It'll totally ruin her.

Not if we disconnect the timer.

The timer is on a trip wire.

If we disconnect it, it'll go off anyway.

[scoffs] I gotta give it to this Retro.
He's pretty clever.

We need to call Bry so she can
get the word out to stop the launch.

How? Assistant Principal Wilson
took all of our phones.

Not all.

[grunting irritably]

-[sighs] Wrong pocket.
-[cell phone beeps]

[cell phone vibrating]

[beeps]

Bob-Bry's phone.

Like how I put our names together?

Bobby, put Bry on!

Sorry, but my cupcake
is getting us cupcakes.

[beeps]

-Did you finish your 3D geometry shape?
-Sure did.

-[timer continues beeping]
-[groans]

-We've been Bobbied.
-[groans]

[Bobby] Just a little symbol
of my un-Bry-dled affection.

A symbol? [chuckles] That's it!

Bobby, thank you, thank you, thank you!

-To us.
-Don't push it.

We got to figure this out ourselves.

I might be able to block Retro's signal
with a Faraday cage.

A who-what cage?

A metal cage that shields
radio frequencies from being sent.

We just need to find one.

And I know where to get it.

Hey, Devon. Think I could borrow that?

Why?

Mind if I don't tell you?

Sounds shady.

[chuckles] I like shady.

-[both] Ugh!
-What is that?

It's a gift for Devon's nana.

[Cam] If I cover the antenna,

the metal mesh from the skull
will block the signal.

-[static]
-[transmitter powering down]

[Cam] Boom. That saved the drone.
Now for the gas.

If you heat nitrous oxide
while it's releasing,

it turns it into harmless oxygen
and nitrogen, neutralizing it.

[Cam] And I've got
the perfect way to heat it.

I got this.

Good thing Janitor Larry
is still stuck in the '90s.

[whirring]

[sighs] That should do it.
I modified the regulator

on the blower in order to heat the gas
to 650 degrees.

I call it my Laughing Gas Hair Blow-Dryer
Heating Contraption Thingy.

You know, maybe you should
just stop trying to name things.

[Cam] Either way, you lose, Retro.

[news anchor] Dr. Tuttle's speech
at Maywood Glen Academy last night

was both inspirational and enlightening.

Her new drone wowed the audience
as it flew.

Congratulations, girls.

Even though we haven't located Retro yet,
you still saved Dr. Tuttle's drone launch.

Job well done on your first mission back.

[McKeyla] And we all got to meet her
after her speech.

It was the one time Bry was speechless.

Go ahead, do your little dance.

What? I'm not a stick in the mud.

♪ Go us! Go us! ♪

-♪ Go us! Go us! ♪
-[static]

[Retro] Hello again, Maywood Glen.

Whoever ruined my plan
to ruin Dr. Tuttle's launch

should know that I'm the ruiner here.

I ruin things, not you!

I'm the destroyer of technology.

And now you'll see what I can really do.

I promise you, I will have the last laugh.

We gotta stop this guy.

I was right!

Check it out.

That's Black Star's symbol.

[Bry] Yeah, but at this angle...

Look familiar?

I don't get it. It's Havoc's symbol, too?

Exactly.

It's like Black Star and Havoc
are somehow... connected.

And if Havoc is involved,

that means that your old friend
Carson Lazarus could be Retro after all.

[theme song playing]