Penn & Teller: Fool Us (2011–…): Season 9, Episode 1 - Episode #9.1 - full transcript
- From the Penn & Teller Theater
at the Rio Hotel in Las Vegas,
here's our host,
Alyson Hannigan!
- Welcome to "Fool Us,"
where we give acts
from around the world
a chance to fool two of
magic's all-time greats,
while we get to
sit back and relax.
The stars of our show
don't have it so easy.
Let's put them to
work right now.
The two and only,
Penn and Teller!
Any magician who fools Penn and
Teller wins bragging rights.
They also get a trophy
to back up that bragging.
And then they get to perform
in "Penn & Teller" show
and really rub it in.
With that in mind, let's
meet tonight's first act.
- My name is Jon Mobley.
And the type of magic I
do is sleight of mind.
Growing up, I was a shy kid,
so magic was a quick
way to break the ice.
The challenge was it
was my go-to every time.
I just didn't wanna be boring.
I thought, "If I'm normal and I
just act like a regular person,
"people aren't gonna wanna
hang out with me, right?
"I've gotta be interesting,
instead of just being
real with people."
Even though I'd been
doing magic my whole life,
it was a mask. It was
something I hid behind.
So I decided I'm taking
a break for a full year.
The most vulnerable thing I
do now is just show up as me,
and it was a breath
of fresh air.
So when I returned to magic,
my approach completely changed.
Penn and Teller, they're known
for putting their own little
spin on classic tricks.
Tonight, I'm gonna put a twist
on something they made famous,
and hopefully fool them
with their own trick.
Penn, Teller, see if
you can catch this.
- Put your hands together
for Indiana's own Jon Mobley.
- You guys, my
original plan tonight
was to fool you with this,
an invisible deck.
But this morning,
I couldn't find it.
But it's fine. In fact,
I'm gonna go all in.
I'm going to attempt
the most dangerous trick
a magician can do,
the bullet catch.
Now, I know what
you're thinking.
You already famously performed
a version of that trick
right here on this stage.
So for me to stand on your stage
and attempt to fool you
with your own trick,
that would be foolish.
Unless I could do it in a way
that you literally
can't see how it's done.
So here's my idea. I'm gonna
take the invisible deck
and the bullet catch and
combine them into a new trick,
something the world
has never seen.
I present to you, for the
first time in history,
the invisible bullet catch!
Alyson, could you
please join me onstage?
Oh, my.
- Alyson, here we have a
box of invisible bullets.
- Uh-huh.
- Have you ever seen one?
- Not till today.
- Okay. Alyson, this
is pretty simple.
I want you to take a look
at these invisible bullets.
I want you to decide
which one you want.
And then I just want you
to carefully take it out
and hold it up.
Perfect.
We have to make
this bullet unique,
which is why we
brought... sorry.
Oh, here it is. My
invisible magic marker.
Alyson, could you move the
bullet to your other hand?
We need your writing hand. I
want you to take this marker.
And the card you're thinking of,
I want you to draw
it on the bullet now.
Awesome. I'll take
the marker.
I love the new ones.
All right, this is the moment.
We have to load it into a gun.
- Oh.
- Guys, when you do this,
you used a Colt
Python .357 Magnum.
Way too ambitious for me.
I'm just gonna use a handgun.
Literally, a handgun.
Alyson, please handle with care.
And you don't need a
license to operate this.
But go ahead and take it.
Yup, perfect.
Right, excellent.
Examine the gun. It's
a normal gun, right?
Gold-plated even right
there, I can tell.
Okay, hold it up.
Safety first, Alyson.
- All right.
- There we go. Okay.
This is the most
important piece.
Please load your
bullet into the gun.
Wow, she's done this
before.
All right, something
amazing is about to happen.
- Okay.
- That bullet is gonna travel
across the stage and
hopefully end up in my mouth.
But we need to get
you in position.
Please step forward
right over here.
And try this.
Maybe try putting
your left foot back
for balance, all right?
Keep that elbow up
the entire time.
And then maybe this
hand on your hip.
How's that feel? Is that okay?
- Odd.
- Odd, okay.
Well, you look great.
- Thanks.
- You do.
Okay. Here's the
moment of truth.
- Okay.
- In position, please.
- Yeah.
- On the count of three,
I want you to fire that
into my face, okay?
- All right.
- Here we go.
Lower the gun.
Oh, you think you're nervous.
3, 2, 1!
- Hm.
- Two things were just fired...
The gun and my sound guy.
Alyson, you shot an
invisible bullet,
but there's a real
bullet in my teeth.
- Yes.
- For the first time,
what was the card
you were thinking
that you drew on the bullet?
- Nine of diamonds.
- Come a little closer here.
Please verify.
Is that a nine of diamonds
drawn on the bullet?
- Yes, it is!
- Alyson. Give Alyson
a round of applause.
- Whoo, Jon Mobley!
All right, that's the only
gun I ever wanna shoot.
- Fair enough. Fair enough.
It's the only one
I've ever shot too.
- Okay, good.
- Yeah.
- Did you have, like, a lot
of invisible friends
when you were growing up?
- It's funny you mentioned that.
I grew up in a really small
town of, like, 5,000 people.
So there weren't
a lot of people.
In fact, magic is how I
became visible to others.
- That's so cool.
- Yeah.
- I had an invisible sister.
- I love that.
We fought a lot.
- That's great.
- Do you do magic 24 hours
a day or do you, um, sleep?
- Yeah, I did magic
a lot growing up.
But now, my wife and I
have three kids under six.
- Oh, I bet they
make you practice
way more than you want to.
- Yeah.
In fact, my son, when he
came... He was five years old...
Came to my very
first magic show,
he had a sparkly magic hat.
He brought his wand.
He sat up front.
And every time I made
eye contact with him,
he was going...
- That's lovely.
- He's my biggest fan.
- Aww.
All right, Jon, let's
see if Penn and Teller
could see through your
invisible magic trick.
- Here we go.
- Oh, Jon, what a nice routine.
You know, to do a bullet catch
that's completely
safe and harmless
and doesn't have anything
on that is really beautiful.
It's the bullet
catch for our times.
It's just light and happy.
And it doesn't make us
think any negative stuff,
just having it all make-believe
all the way through there.
And I thought Alyson
was great, you know.
When you were holding up
to show her the bullets,
it was like Alyson
was seeing the stuff
as you presented it to her.
It was really, really beautiful.
And the trick is really baffling
and a very, very good trick.
And whether you look
at it... you know,
no matter how you look at it,
it's still a good
trick, and we loved it.
And it's a great punchline
and a great performance.
And we don't think
you fooled us.
- What do you think?
- Well, it's so difficult
to fool these guys,
which is why I
also brought this.
- Uh-oh.
- An invisible
participation trophy.
Thanks
for your time, guys.
- Jon Mobley!
Not only will Penn and Teller
take on more magicians,
they'll also take the
stage and perform as well.
More "Fool Us" coming up.
- Welcome back.
Our next act is ready
to take on P and T.
And you get to meet
them right now.
- I'm Sasha.
- And I'm Poppy.
And we're 17-year-old
twins from the United Kingdom.
- We are so connected.
It's like we're
two people in one.
We've got twin energy.
- Which means that we can
get an incredible amount
of things done.
We're both artists.
- We team-illustrate.
And we're doing our own
line of children's books.
- And we're helping
to reduce food waste
by building an app with
a major software company.
- And now, we're user
experience designers
for a luxury car brand.
- Don't forget about
our clothing line.
- And our music.
- And we play chess
on a national level.
- It can get quite interesting
because we can anticipate
each other's next move.
And when we play rock,
paper, scissors...
We never win.
- But for tonight,
we're taking on
the greatest challenge of all.
Can our twin minds
take on the two minds
of Penn and Teller?
Penn, Teller...
Let the games begin.
Pow!
- They'll make you see
double and think twice.
Please welcome the
Van Hargen twins.
Hello, America.
- I'm Poppy.
- And I'm Sasha.
And we are
telepathic twins.
- Now, other mentalists
have been on this stage,
claiming to have
telepathic powers.
But because we're twins,
we actually do share
a psychic connection.
As you can see, we look alike...
And think alike.
- This means that we can send
and receive mental messages
better and faster than anyone.
- If telepathy was
an Olympic sport,
it would be judged on speed.
- That's right, the speed
of thought transmission.
- And to prove our
Olympic-size powers,
we've created a
telepathy triathlon.
Now, what you need to know
is that for telepathletes,
like us,
using a sneaky earpiece
would be useless
because there's just no time
to feed me the information.
- So let's start with a
simple mental magic warm-up.
Poppy, I'm gonna randomly
select a few of these cards
and then telepathically
transmit them to you.
You've then got to tell
everyone which card I've got.
- Seven of diamonds.
Correct!
Let's try another one.
- King of clubs.
- Correct!
- Queen of spades.
- Perfect. We're ready
to go for the gold.
Hey, Alyson, we're
gonna need some help.
Please come and join us onstage.
- All right.
- Poppy, are you ready?
- I'm set.
Go!
- Alyson...
- Yes?
- In that bowl, you have cards
representing 67 Olympic sports.
Please mix them up.
- Please remove any
card that you like,
memorize what's on it,
and then come on over.
Place it in my hands
behind my back.
- Sasha is not allowed
to look at the card
until I blow my whistle.
And then she'll attempt
to send the image to
me as fast as she can.
- So, Alyson, if
Poppy gets this right,
I want you to throw
your arms in the air
like a referee and yell...
It's good!
- All right.
Okay. Yeah.
Okay.
- Diving!
- It's correct!
- Now, for the second event,
this bowl contains 99
Olympic gold medals
from different cities that
have hosted the games.
Now, Alyson, I'd like you
to rummage through this bowl
and remove any medal you like.
But just remember, you
can't show this to anyone.
- Place the medal
in Sasha's hands,
which are behind her back.
This challenge is more difficult
because Sasha will
not get a clear look
at the image she
has to transmit,
so she'll be sending me a blur.
- I'm ready when you are, Poppy.
- Mexico!
- It's correct.
- It is indeed Mexico!
And we did it
in record-speed time.
- And finally, the most
difficult event of all.
- We've eliminated any
possibility of using a force.
So, Penn, it's your turn.
And we're giving you an
absolutely free choice.
In front of you is a bowl filled
with over 200 ping-pong balls.
- Each ball has a name
of a gold medal athlete
written onto it.
Have a look at some now
and make sure they're
all different.
- So, Penn, now that you're
happy that all the balls
really are different...
- I am.
- I want you to dig
your hand into the bowl
and randomly grab
a ping-pong ball.
- When I blow my whistle,
please give Sasha a quick peek
at the name on the ball.
A speedy open and close of
your hands should do it.
And without saying a word,
Sasha will attempt to
send the athlete's name
to me in a flash.
I'll turn my back.
Simone Biles!
- Penn, what's the name of
the performer you've picked?
- Simone Biles.
Whoa!
- No way! Both:
We've done it again!
It's good!
We are the
Van Hargen twins.
And goodnight, America!
- The Van Hargen twins!
Wow. Wow, that was
very entertaining.
- Aww, that was so fun.
- Thank you. Yeah.
No, it's been
absolutely amazing.
Thank you for having us.
- Are you interested in sports?
- Oh, of course.
We play hockey.
We're field hockey players.
- Yeah.
- We golf.
- Fencing, a bit of
football as well, soccer.
- Yeah. It's been our dream
to be in the Olympics.
So we've decided
to create our own.
- Nice. How did you decide
who was gonna throw thoughts
and who was gonna catch them?
- Gosh, wow.
Since a very young age,
we've kind of established
that I'm a lot better at
sending the message to Poppy.
She just receives it.
Yeah, that's how
our telepathy works.
- That's so cool.
- Are you ever competitive
with each other?
- We boost each other up.
I think that's more
important for us.
- Okay, girls, let's see if
your telepathic triathlon
earns you the gold
trophy of magic.
- Oh, my goodness,
did we love that.
Wow! What a great... we just
love people talking in unison,
let alone twins
talking in unison.
We like people dressed alike.
We like everything about you.
We also like people who jump
around the stage for no reason.
It's just... It was
just such a nutty,
wonderful, fun act
with such great energy.
- Thank you. Thank you.
- It was just wonderful.
Even though we know
nothing about sports,
even the Olympic theme we liked.
But now, I'm gonna have to ask
you some questions outright.
I can't even think of
a way to code this,
but were there free choices?
- Yes, absolutely.
- Absolutely.
Free choice all the way.
- Free choices all the
way. And free choices...
Not just a free choice of
two or three things, but...
- Alyson had a
free choice twice.
And you had a free choice.
- Completely.
- Right. But I mean, Alyson,
were there more than,
like, four or five
different sports in there?
- Oh, yeah.
- And the medals too?
- They're all different.
- Yeah, and these are different.
Okay, be that way.
Well, you know, I have not been
coding when I'm talking to you.
But is it possible you
were coding what...
- Not at all - Not at all.
- Oh.
- Okay, we've cheated already.
We've given two guesses.
We're only supposed to give one.
So I'm gonna throw in
another one, though.
- Okay.
- Of course, go ahead.
We won't commit.
- Oh, good.
Is it possible you
just fooled us?
- We have a Fooler...
Well, two Foolers!
- Oh, my God.
- Congratulations!
Thank you so much.
- We fooled them!
Thank you so much.
Thank you so much.
- This means the
world to us, honestly.
- And what an honor. Thank you.
- Yeah.
- I have no idea.
I have no idea clue.
- You'll have to figure out
how to split the trophy.
The Van Hargen twins!
- Thank you so much. A
pleasure to meet you.
- We win!
- I'm totally clueless.
- Oh, snap, we have some
Foolers in the house.
Penn and Teller just
gave away a trophy.
See if that happens again
when "Fool Us" returns.
- Welcome back to "Fooled Them."
That's what I call the show
now that Penn and Teller
got fooled once already.
Do I hear twice?
Meet our next possible
Fooler right now.
- Put your hands together
for Swedish illusionist
Axel Adler.
Whoa!
Axel Adler!
Hi.
Well, if anybody needs a
leg up in this business,
they should come to you, right?
Yeah, sure.
- Is that original to you?
- It's based on, like,
an old variety act.
So it has been in
different versions.
And this is my version.
- Nice.
That looks like a very
strenuous thing to perform.
- Yeah, it's a lot
of work physically.
- Do you have to do stretches
and stuff beforehand?
- Yeah, I have to do, like,
a little bit squats and stuff
and move around the legs.
- What inspired you
to take this on?
- I had an act where
I had the four arms.
So this was the
most logical step.
And then the next step
is maybe with two heads.
- Will you come back
to us with two heads,
four arms, and three legs?
- Sure, if you want to.
- Great. That'd be amazing.
Okay, Axel, let's see if
your three-legged trick
will let you run
away with a trophy.
- Okay.
- Ugh, Axel, that
is a beautiful act.
Just a gorgeous
act, and it just...
It goes all the way through.
And what's interesting
about it...
What Teller pointed out
as we were watching it...
Was it's not you proving
that the legs are real,
that each one of the three legs
is real, that's so powerful.
It's the fact that you prove
that each one of the
three legs isn't real.
The fact that you show clearly
that each one of
the legs is fake
makes it so that each
one of the legs is real.
It's just a... It's
a beautiful routine.
I am so astonished by
the amount of strength,
and choreography, and
planning, and everything else.
And I gotta tell ya,
if this show was called
"Enchant Us," you would win.
If this show was called "Blow
Our Minds," you would win.
If this show was called
"Kill Us Absolutely Dead
with Your Raw Skill and
Genius," you would win.
But the show is
called "Fool Us."
And I don't think you fooled us.
But we come back with
any of those other shows,
you got trophies galore.
That was wonderful, Axel.
- So, Axel, you fooled me,
but did you fool
Penn and Teller?
- I don't think so.
- Okay, well, thank you so much.
Axel Adler!
- Thank you.
- Don't you dare go anywhere.
We have more fantastic magic
for you when we come back.
- Welcome back.
It's time to meet our
next potential Fooler.
- I was born with one
hand and with parents
who didn't see that
as a disability.
Anything I wanted to
do, they said, "Do it."
They never stopped
encouraging me.
Magic was an even
bigger challenge,
but I had my dad as my mentor.
He helped me learn the
secrets and create routines.
Instead of hiding my hands,
I drew attention to them.
Magic gave me the courage
to say, "Look at me.
This is who I am." Then
when I was 16 years old,
my father passed
away unexpectedly,
very unexpectedly.
I stopped doing magic entirely.
I almost couldn't look at it.
I just... it was too much.
Probably about 20 years
after he passed away,
my grandma said, "I
have something for you.
It belonged to your father."
This is my dad's magic box.
He built it himself
when he was a kid.
When I inherited
it, it was empty.
But it was a message
to me to fill that box
to bring back the
magic Dad and I shared.
So, Penn and Teller,
you're not the only
team onstage tonight.
You're up against Dad and me.
And that's why I hope
I just might be about
to fool Penn and Teller.
- Please give a warm welcome
for the amazing magic
of Chris Canfield.
- Magic has always
been in my life.
My father started performing
magic in the late '50s
as a teenager in Chicago.
When I came along, he
passed that love on to me.
I think we've all experienced
magic in our lives...
A beautiful sunset,
the birth of a child.
Of course, from time to
time, there are moments
when we doubt the existence
of magic in our lives.
But all it takes to remind us
is to experience something
truly amazing again,
like pulling a coin
out of thin air.
Penn and Alyson, would you
mind joining me at the table?
Hello.
- Hello.
- Hey.
Now, you may have noticed
I'm a single-handed magician.
I mean, of course, you noticed
I'm a single-handed magician.
You've seen a lot
of solo performance,
but I'm genuinely here to try
to fool you single-handedly.
I was born this way.
I'm not the first to come along,
but we are rare as magicians,
just a few every generation.
As you can imagine, I've
had to navigate a world
designed for two hands.
It's taught me things...
Compassion, ingenuity,
the true value of
opposable thumbs.
And I've had to adapt
to the art of magic,
like shuffling.
Let's see.
That's not showing off.
That's actually the
easiest way for me
to shuffle a deck of cards.
And then cutting.
- Nice.
- No, that is showing
off. I can just do that.
No.
But there are some things I
still haven't figured out.
And maybe it's because
I'm left-handed.
No matter what I do, I can
always cut to a picture card.
- Wow.
- Actually,
I can cut to all of the picture
cards, paired up by color.
Two red Kings, two black Queens,
two red Jacks, and the others.
But... thank you...
If I take these same cards
and simply deal them,
something else amazing happens.
They now alternate by color.
Red, black, red, black,
red, black, red, and black.
And if I deal them
a second time...
Marvelously...
They pair up again by color.
It's two blacks, two reds,
two blacks,
two reds, and two blacks.
- So good.
- So I wondered, "What would
happen if I mixed them up?
"Would they still keep an order?
Or would that be
taking things too far?"
Sadly,
it seems like this
is the end of it.
A Queen and King.
Not a match.
The next two?
Not a match.
And the next.
King and a Jack.
You'd think there'd be at
least one pairing here.
Not a match.
No order.
And for a moment, once again,
we doubt the existence of magic.
But if the three of
us work together,
maybe order can be
magically restored.
Penn, could you please use a
sliver of your magic dexterity
to square the cards
and turn them faceup?
Thank you.
And, Alyson...
- Yes.
- Would you take some
of the love for magic
you carry in your heart
and pass it over the cards?
Thank you.
- Mm-hmm.
- And I'll use all that I have.
Two black Jacks,
two red Queens,
and the Kings, and the Jacks,
and the Queens, and the Kings.
All paired up again by
color.
Order is amazingly restored.
Maybe there is
magic in the world.
Thank
you both so much.
Thank you.
- Thank you.
Chris Canfield!
That was so cool.
- Thank you.
- Ugh, I love it
when I just have,
like, close-up view.
- Oh, I love close-up.
It's my favorite.
Absolutely, yeah.
- Do you feel like
you're connected
to your dad when you perform?
- I do, yeah. When I
do it, he's with me.
I'm kind of honoring his
memory and carrying it on.
- So what was your
childhood like?
- Obviously, born with one hand,
you might think there
are limitations to life.
And maybe there are, but my
parents always encouraged me
just to go for whatever
I could imagine.
- Did you play sports?
- I did.
You know, I grew up on a block
with about 15 other kids.
And we played every single
sport you can imagine...
Football, baseball,
hockey in the winters,
everything,
everything. I loved it.
- What did your parents do?
- My parents opened
a game store.
So I actually grew up
surrounded by games
and game inventors.
- Fun.
- It was really fun.
- And did you ever work there?
- I did work there, yeah.
In fact, that's one of the
things that helped me overcome
being uncomfortable born with
a limb difference, right?
I found out the more
comfortable I am,
the more comfortable
it makes other people.
So that's kind of the goal now.
- All right, Chris, it was great
to see your trick close up.
Let's see if Penn and Teller
know how you did your magic.
- Okay.
- So, Chris,
I was up there right near you.
You could tell how
much I loved it.
You could tell how much.
But I came back and talked
to Teller, who also loved it,
and also pointed out Bill
Simon's Call to Colors,
which you are making much
harder by doing one-handed.
And of course, René Lavand,
who I'm sure is a
inspiration to you.
How could he not be?
- Yes, yeah.
- And he worked a lot of
that stuff out one-handed.
And I wanna just make very,
very clear that routine
you did done with two hands
is wicked, wicked difficult.
And you just did a beautiful
job with it, you know.
And then it made me think
of what a long strange trip
it's been in show
business, you know,
'cause our first deal
that we did together
was Renaissance festivals.
We played a lot of Renaissance
festivals together.
But our second deal, very
early on, our second deal
was we were hired to do a show
for felons under
the age of 15...
Like, really
dangerous criminals,
all under 15,
enjoying a magic show.
And that magic show
was done by us.
And I don't know why that
just crossed my mind,
but I just thought I'd
share that with you,
that we've had some
very, very weird gigs.
And this was a really
wonderful moment to see someone
doing card tricks that
well and with one hand,
which is really phenomenal.
And as you pointed out,
even though you're
using your left hand,
probably genetically,
you're right-handed,
which is... I can't
even get my mind around.
But because we knew René
and because we knew
the Bill Simon thing,
although we loved the act,
I don't think you fooled us.
- Okay. Thank you so much.
- Did any of that felon
talk resonate with you?
- It certainly did.
Thank you. Yes, yes.
- Okay, so you didn't fool them?
- I did not.
- Aww, thank you so much.
- Thank you.
- Chris Canfield!
Penn and Teller get out
of their judge jackets
and into their magic jackets,
which look identical,
by the way.
See them perform
when we come back.
- Welcome back to "Fool Us."
Penn and Teller weren't sure
about closing the show tonight,
but then they said, "Ah, bucket!
Let's do this thing."
Everyone, put your
hands together
for our show closers,
Penn and Teller!
- We like doing the show.
We love doing "Penn
& Teller: Fool Us."
We're proud of it. We love
everybody we work with.
It's good. It's a
good gig for us.
We've been enjoying
doing the show.
We really, really like... we
like working with the producers,
the director...
Everybody's great.
And the network... has
been good, good, good.
But this past
week, we've been...
We've been butting
heads with the network
over this next trick.
We wanna do a
trick. We loved it.
A trick called
"Bucket of Blood"...
Exciting, visceral,
hmm, powerful!
And the network
came to us and said,
"Guys, we don't want you
to do the bucket of blood."
We said, "It's a good
trick. Good trick."
They said, "Oh,
it's a fine trick.
"We just don't like
the blood part.
There's a lot of children
that watch, families."
I said, "Children love blood!"
And they said, "No. Families
wanna watch this show.
"They don't wanna have
blood all over their TV
when they're watching
as a family."
So they said, "Can't you
find another liquid?"
So Teller had the
brilliant idea.
He said, "Well,
children love gasoline."
We thought, "Bucket
of gasoline."
But then turns out
that's too expensive.
So then we said
to them... right?
We said, "Okay, you tell us.
What liquid should we use?
If not blood, not gasoline,
what should we use?"
And they said,
"How about milk?"
I'm a vegan, okay?
So I said, "No way I'm
the milk factory farming
"all that suffering,
climate change.
"And what if a child
watching this show
"is lactose intolerant?
This is a little
bucket of nightmare!"
And they said, "No,
no, no, bucket of milk,
or you don't get
to do the trick."
They have the power.
So we're gonna do the
bucket of milk trick.
We got a bucket
and we have milk.
Now, you would think that
that would make the network
very happy that we completely
conceded to their demands.
You would think
that would be fine.
But they said, "Wait
a minute, guys.
It wasn't just the
blood we objected to.
It's also the bucket."
We said, "What?"
They said, "When you
have a bucket of milk,
a child could get hurt in
that. They could drown."
And we said, "But this bucket...
We gotta have a bucket.
That's the whole bit
for the whole trick."
And they said, "No, no, no,
if you're gonna have a bucket,
"you can't even have a
bottom in the bucket.
There can be no
bottom in the bucket."
We said, "But then
it's not a bucket.
"It's no good without a bottom.
We need a bottom
in the bucket."
So we said, "Okay."
They said we could put
a bottom in the bucket,
but then we had to
turn it upside down.
We had to turn the
bucket upside down.
So now, our bucket of
blood becomes really
not even a bucket, and
certainly not blood.
So it's a non-bucket
of non-blood.
It's a non-bucket of milk.
I'm pouring the milk
into the non-bucket
in order to be safe with that.
And I don't know, it
just doesn't seem...
I mean, I guess
it's an okay trick
to have the milk, but
it was so much better...
So much better with the blood...
With the blood, you know?
I mean, we can do a trick
and be proud of ourselves.
But, you know, the
more I think about it,
we're doing okay on this show.
And it's called "Penn
& Teller: Fool Us."
It's not called
"Network Fool Us."
And every once in a while,
you gotta take a stand.
You gotta stand up to the man.
You gotta do things
the way you want to.
So, yeah, we have got a
bucket. We have got a bucket.
And, yes, that bucket
is full of blood.
If you wanna fire us, go ahead.
But that's the Penn and
Teller Bucket of Blood
the way it's supposed to be.
- Ah.
Ugh, ahh.
That was bloody great.
Huge thanks to all of
tonight's magicians.
We gotta go.
We'll see you next
time on "Fool Us."
Goodnight.
at the Rio Hotel in Las Vegas,
here's our host,
Alyson Hannigan!
- Welcome to "Fool Us,"
where we give acts
from around the world
a chance to fool two of
magic's all-time greats,
while we get to
sit back and relax.
The stars of our show
don't have it so easy.
Let's put them to
work right now.
The two and only,
Penn and Teller!
Any magician who fools Penn and
Teller wins bragging rights.
They also get a trophy
to back up that bragging.
And then they get to perform
in "Penn & Teller" show
and really rub it in.
With that in mind, let's
meet tonight's first act.
- My name is Jon Mobley.
And the type of magic I
do is sleight of mind.
Growing up, I was a shy kid,
so magic was a quick
way to break the ice.
The challenge was it
was my go-to every time.
I just didn't wanna be boring.
I thought, "If I'm normal and I
just act like a regular person,
"people aren't gonna wanna
hang out with me, right?
"I've gotta be interesting,
instead of just being
real with people."
Even though I'd been
doing magic my whole life,
it was a mask. It was
something I hid behind.
So I decided I'm taking
a break for a full year.
The most vulnerable thing I
do now is just show up as me,
and it was a breath
of fresh air.
So when I returned to magic,
my approach completely changed.
Penn and Teller, they're known
for putting their own little
spin on classic tricks.
Tonight, I'm gonna put a twist
on something they made famous,
and hopefully fool them
with their own trick.
Penn, Teller, see if
you can catch this.
- Put your hands together
for Indiana's own Jon Mobley.
- You guys, my
original plan tonight
was to fool you with this,
an invisible deck.
But this morning,
I couldn't find it.
But it's fine. In fact,
I'm gonna go all in.
I'm going to attempt
the most dangerous trick
a magician can do,
the bullet catch.
Now, I know what
you're thinking.
You already famously performed
a version of that trick
right here on this stage.
So for me to stand on your stage
and attempt to fool you
with your own trick,
that would be foolish.
Unless I could do it in a way
that you literally
can't see how it's done.
So here's my idea. I'm gonna
take the invisible deck
and the bullet catch and
combine them into a new trick,
something the world
has never seen.
I present to you, for the
first time in history,
the invisible bullet catch!
Alyson, could you
please join me onstage?
Oh, my.
- Alyson, here we have a
box of invisible bullets.
- Uh-huh.
- Have you ever seen one?
- Not till today.
- Okay. Alyson, this
is pretty simple.
I want you to take a look
at these invisible bullets.
I want you to decide
which one you want.
And then I just want you
to carefully take it out
and hold it up.
Perfect.
We have to make
this bullet unique,
which is why we
brought... sorry.
Oh, here it is. My
invisible magic marker.
Alyson, could you move the
bullet to your other hand?
We need your writing hand. I
want you to take this marker.
And the card you're thinking of,
I want you to draw
it on the bullet now.
Awesome. I'll take
the marker.
I love the new ones.
All right, this is the moment.
We have to load it into a gun.
- Oh.
- Guys, when you do this,
you used a Colt
Python .357 Magnum.
Way too ambitious for me.
I'm just gonna use a handgun.
Literally, a handgun.
Alyson, please handle with care.
And you don't need a
license to operate this.
But go ahead and take it.
Yup, perfect.
Right, excellent.
Examine the gun. It's
a normal gun, right?
Gold-plated even right
there, I can tell.
Okay, hold it up.
Safety first, Alyson.
- All right.
- There we go. Okay.
This is the most
important piece.
Please load your
bullet into the gun.
Wow, she's done this
before.
All right, something
amazing is about to happen.
- Okay.
- That bullet is gonna travel
across the stage and
hopefully end up in my mouth.
But we need to get
you in position.
Please step forward
right over here.
And try this.
Maybe try putting
your left foot back
for balance, all right?
Keep that elbow up
the entire time.
And then maybe this
hand on your hip.
How's that feel? Is that okay?
- Odd.
- Odd, okay.
Well, you look great.
- Thanks.
- You do.
Okay. Here's the
moment of truth.
- Okay.
- In position, please.
- Yeah.
- On the count of three,
I want you to fire that
into my face, okay?
- All right.
- Here we go.
Lower the gun.
Oh, you think you're nervous.
3, 2, 1!
- Hm.
- Two things were just fired...
The gun and my sound guy.
Alyson, you shot an
invisible bullet,
but there's a real
bullet in my teeth.
- Yes.
- For the first time,
what was the card
you were thinking
that you drew on the bullet?
- Nine of diamonds.
- Come a little closer here.
Please verify.
Is that a nine of diamonds
drawn on the bullet?
- Yes, it is!
- Alyson. Give Alyson
a round of applause.
- Whoo, Jon Mobley!
All right, that's the only
gun I ever wanna shoot.
- Fair enough. Fair enough.
It's the only one
I've ever shot too.
- Okay, good.
- Yeah.
- Did you have, like, a lot
of invisible friends
when you were growing up?
- It's funny you mentioned that.
I grew up in a really small
town of, like, 5,000 people.
So there weren't
a lot of people.
In fact, magic is how I
became visible to others.
- That's so cool.
- Yeah.
- I had an invisible sister.
- I love that.
We fought a lot.
- That's great.
- Do you do magic 24 hours
a day or do you, um, sleep?
- Yeah, I did magic
a lot growing up.
But now, my wife and I
have three kids under six.
- Oh, I bet they
make you practice
way more than you want to.
- Yeah.
In fact, my son, when he
came... He was five years old...
Came to my very
first magic show,
he had a sparkly magic hat.
He brought his wand.
He sat up front.
And every time I made
eye contact with him,
he was going...
- That's lovely.
- He's my biggest fan.
- Aww.
All right, Jon, let's
see if Penn and Teller
could see through your
invisible magic trick.
- Here we go.
- Oh, Jon, what a nice routine.
You know, to do a bullet catch
that's completely
safe and harmless
and doesn't have anything
on that is really beautiful.
It's the bullet
catch for our times.
It's just light and happy.
And it doesn't make us
think any negative stuff,
just having it all make-believe
all the way through there.
And I thought Alyson
was great, you know.
When you were holding up
to show her the bullets,
it was like Alyson
was seeing the stuff
as you presented it to her.
It was really, really beautiful.
And the trick is really baffling
and a very, very good trick.
And whether you look
at it... you know,
no matter how you look at it,
it's still a good
trick, and we loved it.
And it's a great punchline
and a great performance.
And we don't think
you fooled us.
- What do you think?
- Well, it's so difficult
to fool these guys,
which is why I
also brought this.
- Uh-oh.
- An invisible
participation trophy.
Thanks
for your time, guys.
- Jon Mobley!
Not only will Penn and Teller
take on more magicians,
they'll also take the
stage and perform as well.
More "Fool Us" coming up.
- Welcome back.
Our next act is ready
to take on P and T.
And you get to meet
them right now.
- I'm Sasha.
- And I'm Poppy.
And we're 17-year-old
twins from the United Kingdom.
- We are so connected.
It's like we're
two people in one.
We've got twin energy.
- Which means that we can
get an incredible amount
of things done.
We're both artists.
- We team-illustrate.
And we're doing our own
line of children's books.
- And we're helping
to reduce food waste
by building an app with
a major software company.
- And now, we're user
experience designers
for a luxury car brand.
- Don't forget about
our clothing line.
- And our music.
- And we play chess
on a national level.
- It can get quite interesting
because we can anticipate
each other's next move.
And when we play rock,
paper, scissors...
We never win.
- But for tonight,
we're taking on
the greatest challenge of all.
Can our twin minds
take on the two minds
of Penn and Teller?
Penn, Teller...
Let the games begin.
Pow!
- They'll make you see
double and think twice.
Please welcome the
Van Hargen twins.
Hello, America.
- I'm Poppy.
- And I'm Sasha.
And we are
telepathic twins.
- Now, other mentalists
have been on this stage,
claiming to have
telepathic powers.
But because we're twins,
we actually do share
a psychic connection.
As you can see, we look alike...
And think alike.
- This means that we can send
and receive mental messages
better and faster than anyone.
- If telepathy was
an Olympic sport,
it would be judged on speed.
- That's right, the speed
of thought transmission.
- And to prove our
Olympic-size powers,
we've created a
telepathy triathlon.
Now, what you need to know
is that for telepathletes,
like us,
using a sneaky earpiece
would be useless
because there's just no time
to feed me the information.
- So let's start with a
simple mental magic warm-up.
Poppy, I'm gonna randomly
select a few of these cards
and then telepathically
transmit them to you.
You've then got to tell
everyone which card I've got.
- Seven of diamonds.
Correct!
Let's try another one.
- King of clubs.
- Correct!
- Queen of spades.
- Perfect. We're ready
to go for the gold.
Hey, Alyson, we're
gonna need some help.
Please come and join us onstage.
- All right.
- Poppy, are you ready?
- I'm set.
Go!
- Alyson...
- Yes?
- In that bowl, you have cards
representing 67 Olympic sports.
Please mix them up.
- Please remove any
card that you like,
memorize what's on it,
and then come on over.
Place it in my hands
behind my back.
- Sasha is not allowed
to look at the card
until I blow my whistle.
And then she'll attempt
to send the image to
me as fast as she can.
- So, Alyson, if
Poppy gets this right,
I want you to throw
your arms in the air
like a referee and yell...
It's good!
- All right.
Okay. Yeah.
Okay.
- Diving!
- It's correct!
- Now, for the second event,
this bowl contains 99
Olympic gold medals
from different cities that
have hosted the games.
Now, Alyson, I'd like you
to rummage through this bowl
and remove any medal you like.
But just remember, you
can't show this to anyone.
- Place the medal
in Sasha's hands,
which are behind her back.
This challenge is more difficult
because Sasha will
not get a clear look
at the image she
has to transmit,
so she'll be sending me a blur.
- I'm ready when you are, Poppy.
- Mexico!
- It's correct.
- It is indeed Mexico!
And we did it
in record-speed time.
- And finally, the most
difficult event of all.
- We've eliminated any
possibility of using a force.
So, Penn, it's your turn.
And we're giving you an
absolutely free choice.
In front of you is a bowl filled
with over 200 ping-pong balls.
- Each ball has a name
of a gold medal athlete
written onto it.
Have a look at some now
and make sure they're
all different.
- So, Penn, now that you're
happy that all the balls
really are different...
- I am.
- I want you to dig
your hand into the bowl
and randomly grab
a ping-pong ball.
- When I blow my whistle,
please give Sasha a quick peek
at the name on the ball.
A speedy open and close of
your hands should do it.
And without saying a word,
Sasha will attempt to
send the athlete's name
to me in a flash.
I'll turn my back.
Simone Biles!
- Penn, what's the name of
the performer you've picked?
- Simone Biles.
Whoa!
- No way! Both:
We've done it again!
It's good!
We are the
Van Hargen twins.
And goodnight, America!
- The Van Hargen twins!
Wow. Wow, that was
very entertaining.
- Aww, that was so fun.
- Thank you. Yeah.
No, it's been
absolutely amazing.
Thank you for having us.
- Are you interested in sports?
- Oh, of course.
We play hockey.
We're field hockey players.
- Yeah.
- We golf.
- Fencing, a bit of
football as well, soccer.
- Yeah. It's been our dream
to be in the Olympics.
So we've decided
to create our own.
- Nice. How did you decide
who was gonna throw thoughts
and who was gonna catch them?
- Gosh, wow.
Since a very young age,
we've kind of established
that I'm a lot better at
sending the message to Poppy.
She just receives it.
Yeah, that's how
our telepathy works.
- That's so cool.
- Are you ever competitive
with each other?
- We boost each other up.
I think that's more
important for us.
- Okay, girls, let's see if
your telepathic triathlon
earns you the gold
trophy of magic.
- Oh, my goodness,
did we love that.
Wow! What a great... we just
love people talking in unison,
let alone twins
talking in unison.
We like people dressed alike.
We like everything about you.
We also like people who jump
around the stage for no reason.
It's just... It was
just such a nutty,
wonderful, fun act
with such great energy.
- Thank you. Thank you.
- It was just wonderful.
Even though we know
nothing about sports,
even the Olympic theme we liked.
But now, I'm gonna have to ask
you some questions outright.
I can't even think of
a way to code this,
but were there free choices?
- Yes, absolutely.
- Absolutely.
Free choice all the way.
- Free choices all the
way. And free choices...
Not just a free choice of
two or three things, but...
- Alyson had a
free choice twice.
And you had a free choice.
- Completely.
- Right. But I mean, Alyson,
were there more than,
like, four or five
different sports in there?
- Oh, yeah.
- And the medals too?
- They're all different.
- Yeah, and these are different.
Okay, be that way.
Well, you know, I have not been
coding when I'm talking to you.
But is it possible you
were coding what...
- Not at all - Not at all.
- Oh.
- Okay, we've cheated already.
We've given two guesses.
We're only supposed to give one.
So I'm gonna throw in
another one, though.
- Okay.
- Of course, go ahead.
We won't commit.
- Oh, good.
Is it possible you
just fooled us?
- We have a Fooler...
Well, two Foolers!
- Oh, my God.
- Congratulations!
Thank you so much.
- We fooled them!
Thank you so much.
Thank you so much.
- This means the
world to us, honestly.
- And what an honor. Thank you.
- Yeah.
- I have no idea.
I have no idea clue.
- You'll have to figure out
how to split the trophy.
The Van Hargen twins!
- Thank you so much. A
pleasure to meet you.
- We win!
- I'm totally clueless.
- Oh, snap, we have some
Foolers in the house.
Penn and Teller just
gave away a trophy.
See if that happens again
when "Fool Us" returns.
- Welcome back to "Fooled Them."
That's what I call the show
now that Penn and Teller
got fooled once already.
Do I hear twice?
Meet our next possible
Fooler right now.
- Put your hands together
for Swedish illusionist
Axel Adler.
Whoa!
Axel Adler!
Hi.
Well, if anybody needs a
leg up in this business,
they should come to you, right?
Yeah, sure.
- Is that original to you?
- It's based on, like,
an old variety act.
So it has been in
different versions.
And this is my version.
- Nice.
That looks like a very
strenuous thing to perform.
- Yeah, it's a lot
of work physically.
- Do you have to do stretches
and stuff beforehand?
- Yeah, I have to do, like,
a little bit squats and stuff
and move around the legs.
- What inspired you
to take this on?
- I had an act where
I had the four arms.
So this was the
most logical step.
And then the next step
is maybe with two heads.
- Will you come back
to us with two heads,
four arms, and three legs?
- Sure, if you want to.
- Great. That'd be amazing.
Okay, Axel, let's see if
your three-legged trick
will let you run
away with a trophy.
- Okay.
- Ugh, Axel, that
is a beautiful act.
Just a gorgeous
act, and it just...
It goes all the way through.
And what's interesting
about it...
What Teller pointed out
as we were watching it...
Was it's not you proving
that the legs are real,
that each one of the three legs
is real, that's so powerful.
It's the fact that you prove
that each one of the
three legs isn't real.
The fact that you show clearly
that each one of
the legs is fake
makes it so that each
one of the legs is real.
It's just a... It's
a beautiful routine.
I am so astonished by
the amount of strength,
and choreography, and
planning, and everything else.
And I gotta tell ya,
if this show was called
"Enchant Us," you would win.
If this show was called "Blow
Our Minds," you would win.
If this show was called
"Kill Us Absolutely Dead
with Your Raw Skill and
Genius," you would win.
But the show is
called "Fool Us."
And I don't think you fooled us.
But we come back with
any of those other shows,
you got trophies galore.
That was wonderful, Axel.
- So, Axel, you fooled me,
but did you fool
Penn and Teller?
- I don't think so.
- Okay, well, thank you so much.
Axel Adler!
- Thank you.
- Don't you dare go anywhere.
We have more fantastic magic
for you when we come back.
- Welcome back.
It's time to meet our
next potential Fooler.
- I was born with one
hand and with parents
who didn't see that
as a disability.
Anything I wanted to
do, they said, "Do it."
They never stopped
encouraging me.
Magic was an even
bigger challenge,
but I had my dad as my mentor.
He helped me learn the
secrets and create routines.
Instead of hiding my hands,
I drew attention to them.
Magic gave me the courage
to say, "Look at me.
This is who I am." Then
when I was 16 years old,
my father passed
away unexpectedly,
very unexpectedly.
I stopped doing magic entirely.
I almost couldn't look at it.
I just... it was too much.
Probably about 20 years
after he passed away,
my grandma said, "I
have something for you.
It belonged to your father."
This is my dad's magic box.
He built it himself
when he was a kid.
When I inherited
it, it was empty.
But it was a message
to me to fill that box
to bring back the
magic Dad and I shared.
So, Penn and Teller,
you're not the only
team onstage tonight.
You're up against Dad and me.
And that's why I hope
I just might be about
to fool Penn and Teller.
- Please give a warm welcome
for the amazing magic
of Chris Canfield.
- Magic has always
been in my life.
My father started performing
magic in the late '50s
as a teenager in Chicago.
When I came along, he
passed that love on to me.
I think we've all experienced
magic in our lives...
A beautiful sunset,
the birth of a child.
Of course, from time to
time, there are moments
when we doubt the existence
of magic in our lives.
But all it takes to remind us
is to experience something
truly amazing again,
like pulling a coin
out of thin air.
Penn and Alyson, would you
mind joining me at the table?
Hello.
- Hello.
- Hey.
Now, you may have noticed
I'm a single-handed magician.
I mean, of course, you noticed
I'm a single-handed magician.
You've seen a lot
of solo performance,
but I'm genuinely here to try
to fool you single-handedly.
I was born this way.
I'm not the first to come along,
but we are rare as magicians,
just a few every generation.
As you can imagine, I've
had to navigate a world
designed for two hands.
It's taught me things...
Compassion, ingenuity,
the true value of
opposable thumbs.
And I've had to adapt
to the art of magic,
like shuffling.
Let's see.
That's not showing off.
That's actually the
easiest way for me
to shuffle a deck of cards.
And then cutting.
- Nice.
- No, that is showing
off. I can just do that.
No.
But there are some things I
still haven't figured out.
And maybe it's because
I'm left-handed.
No matter what I do, I can
always cut to a picture card.
- Wow.
- Actually,
I can cut to all of the picture
cards, paired up by color.
Two red Kings, two black Queens,
two red Jacks, and the others.
But... thank you...
If I take these same cards
and simply deal them,
something else amazing happens.
They now alternate by color.
Red, black, red, black,
red, black, red, and black.
And if I deal them
a second time...
Marvelously...
They pair up again by color.
It's two blacks, two reds,
two blacks,
two reds, and two blacks.
- So good.
- So I wondered, "What would
happen if I mixed them up?
"Would they still keep an order?
Or would that be
taking things too far?"
Sadly,
it seems like this
is the end of it.
A Queen and King.
Not a match.
The next two?
Not a match.
And the next.
King and a Jack.
You'd think there'd be at
least one pairing here.
Not a match.
No order.
And for a moment, once again,
we doubt the existence of magic.
But if the three of
us work together,
maybe order can be
magically restored.
Penn, could you please use a
sliver of your magic dexterity
to square the cards
and turn them faceup?
Thank you.
And, Alyson...
- Yes.
- Would you take some
of the love for magic
you carry in your heart
and pass it over the cards?
Thank you.
- Mm-hmm.
- And I'll use all that I have.
Two black Jacks,
two red Queens,
and the Kings, and the Jacks,
and the Queens, and the Kings.
All paired up again by
color.
Order is amazingly restored.
Maybe there is
magic in the world.
Thank
you both so much.
Thank you.
- Thank you.
Chris Canfield!
That was so cool.
- Thank you.
- Ugh, I love it
when I just have,
like, close-up view.
- Oh, I love close-up.
It's my favorite.
Absolutely, yeah.
- Do you feel like
you're connected
to your dad when you perform?
- I do, yeah. When I
do it, he's with me.
I'm kind of honoring his
memory and carrying it on.
- So what was your
childhood like?
- Obviously, born with one hand,
you might think there
are limitations to life.
And maybe there are, but my
parents always encouraged me
just to go for whatever
I could imagine.
- Did you play sports?
- I did.
You know, I grew up on a block
with about 15 other kids.
And we played every single
sport you can imagine...
Football, baseball,
hockey in the winters,
everything,
everything. I loved it.
- What did your parents do?
- My parents opened
a game store.
So I actually grew up
surrounded by games
and game inventors.
- Fun.
- It was really fun.
- And did you ever work there?
- I did work there, yeah.
In fact, that's one of the
things that helped me overcome
being uncomfortable born with
a limb difference, right?
I found out the more
comfortable I am,
the more comfortable
it makes other people.
So that's kind of the goal now.
- All right, Chris, it was great
to see your trick close up.
Let's see if Penn and Teller
know how you did your magic.
- Okay.
- So, Chris,
I was up there right near you.
You could tell how
much I loved it.
You could tell how much.
But I came back and talked
to Teller, who also loved it,
and also pointed out Bill
Simon's Call to Colors,
which you are making much
harder by doing one-handed.
And of course, René Lavand,
who I'm sure is a
inspiration to you.
How could he not be?
- Yes, yeah.
- And he worked a lot of
that stuff out one-handed.
And I wanna just make very,
very clear that routine
you did done with two hands
is wicked, wicked difficult.
And you just did a beautiful
job with it, you know.
And then it made me think
of what a long strange trip
it's been in show
business, you know,
'cause our first deal
that we did together
was Renaissance festivals.
We played a lot of Renaissance
festivals together.
But our second deal, very
early on, our second deal
was we were hired to do a show
for felons under
the age of 15...
Like, really
dangerous criminals,
all under 15,
enjoying a magic show.
And that magic show
was done by us.
And I don't know why that
just crossed my mind,
but I just thought I'd
share that with you,
that we've had some
very, very weird gigs.
And this was a really
wonderful moment to see someone
doing card tricks that
well and with one hand,
which is really phenomenal.
And as you pointed out,
even though you're
using your left hand,
probably genetically,
you're right-handed,
which is... I can't
even get my mind around.
But because we knew René
and because we knew
the Bill Simon thing,
although we loved the act,
I don't think you fooled us.
- Okay. Thank you so much.
- Did any of that felon
talk resonate with you?
- It certainly did.
Thank you. Yes, yes.
- Okay, so you didn't fool them?
- I did not.
- Aww, thank you so much.
- Thank you.
- Chris Canfield!
Penn and Teller get out
of their judge jackets
and into their magic jackets,
which look identical,
by the way.
See them perform
when we come back.
- Welcome back to "Fool Us."
Penn and Teller weren't sure
about closing the show tonight,
but then they said, "Ah, bucket!
Let's do this thing."
Everyone, put your
hands together
for our show closers,
Penn and Teller!
- We like doing the show.
We love doing "Penn
& Teller: Fool Us."
We're proud of it. We love
everybody we work with.
It's good. It's a
good gig for us.
We've been enjoying
doing the show.
We really, really like... we
like working with the producers,
the director...
Everybody's great.
And the network... has
been good, good, good.
But this past
week, we've been...
We've been butting
heads with the network
over this next trick.
We wanna do a
trick. We loved it.
A trick called
"Bucket of Blood"...
Exciting, visceral,
hmm, powerful!
And the network
came to us and said,
"Guys, we don't want you
to do the bucket of blood."
We said, "It's a good
trick. Good trick."
They said, "Oh,
it's a fine trick.
"We just don't like
the blood part.
There's a lot of children
that watch, families."
I said, "Children love blood!"
And they said, "No. Families
wanna watch this show.
"They don't wanna have
blood all over their TV
when they're watching
as a family."
So they said, "Can't you
find another liquid?"
So Teller had the
brilliant idea.
He said, "Well,
children love gasoline."
We thought, "Bucket
of gasoline."
But then turns out
that's too expensive.
So then we said
to them... right?
We said, "Okay, you tell us.
What liquid should we use?
If not blood, not gasoline,
what should we use?"
And they said,
"How about milk?"
I'm a vegan, okay?
So I said, "No way I'm
the milk factory farming
"all that suffering,
climate change.
"And what if a child
watching this show
"is lactose intolerant?
This is a little
bucket of nightmare!"
And they said, "No,
no, no, bucket of milk,
or you don't get
to do the trick."
They have the power.
So we're gonna do the
bucket of milk trick.
We got a bucket
and we have milk.
Now, you would think that
that would make the network
very happy that we completely
conceded to their demands.
You would think
that would be fine.
But they said, "Wait
a minute, guys.
It wasn't just the
blood we objected to.
It's also the bucket."
We said, "What?"
They said, "When you
have a bucket of milk,
a child could get hurt in
that. They could drown."
And we said, "But this bucket...
We gotta have a bucket.
That's the whole bit
for the whole trick."
And they said, "No, no, no,
if you're gonna have a bucket,
"you can't even have a
bottom in the bucket.
There can be no
bottom in the bucket."
We said, "But then
it's not a bucket.
"It's no good without a bottom.
We need a bottom
in the bucket."
So we said, "Okay."
They said we could put
a bottom in the bucket,
but then we had to
turn it upside down.
We had to turn the
bucket upside down.
So now, our bucket of
blood becomes really
not even a bucket, and
certainly not blood.
So it's a non-bucket
of non-blood.
It's a non-bucket of milk.
I'm pouring the milk
into the non-bucket
in order to be safe with that.
And I don't know, it
just doesn't seem...
I mean, I guess
it's an okay trick
to have the milk, but
it was so much better...
So much better with the blood...
With the blood, you know?
I mean, we can do a trick
and be proud of ourselves.
But, you know, the
more I think about it,
we're doing okay on this show.
And it's called "Penn
& Teller: Fool Us."
It's not called
"Network Fool Us."
And every once in a while,
you gotta take a stand.
You gotta stand up to the man.
You gotta do things
the way you want to.
So, yeah, we have got a
bucket. We have got a bucket.
And, yes, that bucket
is full of blood.
If you wanna fire us, go ahead.
But that's the Penn and
Teller Bucket of Blood
the way it's supposed to be.
- Ah.
Ugh, ahh.
That was bloody great.
Huge thanks to all of
tonight's magicians.
We gotta go.
We'll see you next
time on "Fool Us."
Goodnight.