Nehama (2019): Season 1, Episode 7 - Episode #1.7 - full transcript
I call the municipality
5 times a day.
Eden faxes them online.
Girl's a genius.
She talked to them too,
posing as the aunt.
And who's in charge of new crosswalks
in the municipality?
Amikam Bukboza, remember him?
His dad was the super.
We'd tease him because his dad stuttered
and his mom was disabled.
Unlucky family. And it's the most
dangerous intersection in the country.
I tell them they've got
to put a crosswalk here
and he just won't approve it.
So here I am at 3 a.m. ,
working instead of them.
Why aren't you saying anything?
I don't want to bother you
in the middle of parental capacity.
Are you crazy? I'm your brother.
Tell me what's going on.
Michal Solomon's getting married and she
keeps messaging me on Instagram.
Right, she opened that account
to get her messages across to you.
Social network was founded
so that girls in bikinis
can get their messages across to you
through their cleavages.
What's your problem? Go this way.
What's the big deal?
Go on !
I'll paint you!
Go on, you dimwit!
Get a load of that asshole.
That's Israel for you.
And what if it's my baby
in her belly?
This baby's destiny is getting changed
without anyone asking its permission.
Instead of growing up with his fathe
who cares and thinks about him,
he'll grow up with...
-Someone sane?
Is that really that bad?
So you're saying that if someone
could raise your kids better than you
you'd give them away?
Just let it go, Oren.
You have an amazing wife who loves you
and looks great,
if you're into neurotic redheads.
Why get hung up on Michal Solomon?
Forget about it. Get me the stop sign.
Got a great idea for a story.
From early on, Vicky Bukaukau
had strong social awareness.
Born to a poor family, she remembered
the humiliation as she asked:
"Who sends us boxes every Friday?"
Cola!
can't believe it
For 30 years, Vicky worked
as a midwife in a hospital.
She knew that a person's glass ceiling
was set the second he was born:
Who'd be poor
and who'd be rich.
So occasionally, she liked
to mess with people's fortunes.
But the truth eventually comes out
and despite what people tend to think,
that's usually not a good thing.
It is well known that eye color changes
by the age of five.
When blue-eyed parents
all over the country
start reporting
having brown-eyed children,
a Health Ministry inquiry is conducted.
Soon enough, one name links all the cases
of kidnapping: Vicky Bukaukau.
Vicky Bukaukau!
11 years after the birth
of their firstborn,
the Arbels hear a knock
at the door.
They open it.
A policeman and a social worker
explain the horrible hitch:
son was switched at birth.
Turns out their son had been growing up
for 11 years
in the village of Dro'a El-Jarbiyya,
under the name of Munjid Kassim Al-Azizi.
Munjid, come home.
Their son Yali
moves to Dro'a.
Dad, don't let him
touch my PlayStation!
His attention disorder goes away
but rage fills him.
He eventually becomes leader
of the Northern Galilee's Islamic party.
The Arbels are left with Munjid.
He enters
the large and forbidding Jewish house
places he had dreamt of entering
only as a burglar or a plumber.
At night,
he turns to Allah for help.
"Almighty Allah...
The dad who worked with the Aerospace
Industries for so many years can't calm down
You know this means that
my security clearance is kaput.
He's going to murder us all. It's ISIS.
-You're talking nonsense.
What's that?
-What?
If he tries anything,
I'll spray him in the face.
I want you to get the Filipina
to sleep down here tonight.
"Almighty Allah,
in the name of merciful God...
But to their surprise, a few weeks later,
things looked completely different.
Guys, Munjid is a gift.
He's an amazing kid,
does everything that Danny tells him to.
He comes from a patriarchal family.
Fathers are fully respected there.
When Danny comes back from work
Munjid brings him slippers
and makes him Turkish coffee
just the way he likes it.
Yogev used to curse me
and Na'ama. -Yes.
And he has no social problems
at school.
If he has a problem,
he solves it on his own.
Yes, he's an old-fashioned kid,
who gives respect.
Where is he?
Look at that.
He's making us a roast for dinner tonight.
Sacrificial feast.
I love you, beloved son.
-Mommy's sweet boy.
What a kid.
What a kid.
No, stay back there.
-You lashed out last time.
Okay.
Nehama, I felt
throughout the process
that you're not really.
- Look he re, Shosh...
Excuse me,
I'm not done.
Oh, sorry.
That you don't really understand
the parental capacity assessment.
I suggest you take it seriously.
Neither of you has any right to judge me.
I'm on my own with 5 kids,
that's a great assessment of my parental
capacity, as you callously call it.
Have either of you stayed
with 5 kids for more than 5 minutes?
Nehama... -That's exactly
what we want to assess,
if you're truly capable of running
this whole process on your own.
After Jonathan tried... -To kill himself.
For the thousandth time.
Is this the first family
where someone took sleeping pills?
If I were a woman,
would anyone be checking me now?
We do many times. -Only in the midst
of a dirty divorce process,
not like this, where you two
show up in the middle of my life.
I'm a great father.
You know what I did last night?
I painted a crosswalk and hung a stop sign
at the corner next to the kids' school.
I don't have a car and they walk to school
so I was scared.
And I even found
a spread for Jonathan's sandwich.
I take olive oil and ketchup
and mix it with parsley,
it' s the only way
he'll eat leafy greens.
Everything will be taken into account.
You have many admirable sides, Nehama.
I also managed to solve
the laundry sorting issue.
I have an 85% success rate,
so I still have a ways to go.
And I tell them I love them every night
wheneve r.
Even if I have a show, I call them
and tell them I love them.
Why don't you write down
the good things?
Is it true that your daughter
had an affair with her teacher?
What?
-Is this affair even
And is it true that Amir
ran over his grandfather?
He's driving with no license, at his age?
-Where did you hear that?
It's all not true,
by the way.
It's material
that I make up for shows.
Oh, so you tell jokes
about the children?
You're just taking things out of context.
It's what artists do.
I take material from life,
distort it and use it.
For money.
-Again...
What's up with you?
You keep distorting what I say.
Nehama, we're very concerned.
We think that despite all your efforts
we should introduce another legal guardian.
- But I'm not a j unkie.
What about Tamar's mother?
Your parents? Perhaps your brother?
Oren? He's a retard.
-He's a psychologist, isn't he?
He's a police social worker who got
kicked out of an SAT prep course.
What are the job requirements?
Partial knowledge of the Hebrew language?
I wouldn't let him
watch my goldfish.
Listen, I take care of him.
He's like my sixth child.
Don't bring him into this,
it'll stress him out.
We're going to pay you
a surprise visit soon.
But I'm not a junkie!
-Start treating it seriously, Nehama.
I really hope there's no affair between
a grown man and a minor girl in your family
because that could cast a heavy shadow
on your fatherhood, okay?
Okay.
Thank you so very much.
Good day.
-That's Israel for you...
Shir. -What? -Clean the house
get it in order right now.
Ask Amir. -Shir, it's an emergency.
The Nazis are coming to raid our house.
Who? -The parental capacity committee.
They're gonna take away your siblings.
And is that bad? -What?!
-Dad, we're falling apart.
It looks like you need a vacation.
-There are no vacations from kids.
Go over the house,
hide any rotten food,
all the dirty clothes
and any sharp objects.
And shower Jonathan and Amir, okay?
I'll hose them down in the yard.
It's most effective.
Whatever you think, I trust you.
-I wish I could say it's mutual.
And Shir. . .
What?
The thing with the teacher...
Is it over?
Oh my god,
for the thousandth time,
nothing happened
with any teacher. -Shir,
this it's is money-time,
an emergency.
You've got to end it now,
if you haven't yet. Promise me.
The teacher's dead, Dad.
Don't worry.
Good.
See you, sweetie.
Nehama,
what are you doing here?
Hey, Michali. That's funny,
what are you doing here?
I live around here.
What are you doing here?
I saw on Instagram that
you're pregnant. Congrats.
can I touch your belly?
There's no belly yet.
-Of course there is.
Michal and I are trying now, too.
-Oh. -Yeah, but...
seems she has fertility issues.
How long have you been trying?
Two months.
But you know me,
I'm impatient,
so we told our doctor
that we've been at it for two years.
Now, get this.
They sent me
for these genetic tests.
Oh, great.
Thing is, I didn't ask for them.
As a doctor,
did you do something behind my back and
send me to these tests without my knowing?
What?
Why would I do that?
Because you think the baby is mine,
just like I do.
Okay...
the dates exactly
and you're anxious and a control freak.
-You're crazy, Oren.
You're a reta rd,
you're a sick man.
Look me in the eyes, Michail. Tell me
you didn't send me to take those tests.
They send everyone
who starts fertility treatments,
which are redundant, by the way,
if you only started two months ago!
So you're saying I'm paranoid and imagining
that you're sending me to get tested?
Yes.
Yes, Nehama.
So I was just having these crazy thoughts
and preparing speeches...
You sure you didn't send me?
Did you follow me here?
Of course.
You're not answering me.
We made a mistake.
We had sex twice... -Three times.
I betrayed my best friend twice.
-Three times.
But I'm getting married now.
You can't get married.
-Why not?
You're married, I'll be married too.
I've been with him for 7 years.
Because the baby is mine.
-He's not, Oren. I swear he's not. 100%.
And stop talking about it,
don't mention it again.
Can I touch your belly?
Amir, tell them
you're going to focus at school.
That you're going on Ritalin.
Repeat after me...
I'm starting . . .
-I'm starting to focus at school.
I work at a greengrocer's,
I'm in a class for gifted kids.
I'm okay, Shir .
-Don't mention the greengrocer's.
You're home every afternoon with me
and Eden, doing your homework.
Understand?
-Yes .
Eden, you're ready.
You were born ready.
I don't feel comfortable lying.
-Eden, open your eyes.
Telling the truth
is for the privileged.
Johnny, look at me.
You know what you have to say, right?
-That I'm happy.
Good.
Otherwise, they'll take Dad away too.
And what are you going to tell them
about what you're doing, Shir?
Shut up, Eden.
-What's up, guys? -It's all good.
Sorry I'm late.
Things were crazy at work.
Everyone's bathed and ready.
-Good job.
I'm going to leave you 50% of the house,
and the rest will share what's left.
Don't be stressed.
I've done thousands
of presentations.
We go in there
and tell our truth.
We're a cool family and that'll win
the day. I'll make them laugh
and we'll be out of there in a few minutes
with the "Grand Slam," okay?
Who's watching Itai?!
Just kidding, he's at Grandma's.
See? Humor works.
It releases tension.
Shoshi and Dalit,
as you can see,
the kids are doing great.
Eve rything's
And let's start with Jonathan.
Why don't you tell them what you told me?
Um, I'm great.
Everything's fine, it won't happen again.
And I'm happy.
Tell them the truth.
That's the truth.
-Okay, but you're not happy.
'm not happy eithe
We all miss Mom.
Only psychopaths or the mentally ill
would feel happy at this point.
We don't like the use of the term
"the mentally ill" here.
Cool, and I didn't like
"parental capacity."
Our dad is always on top of things,
he always knows what's up.
I went to see him
because a teacher in school
harassed me
and he just read me
like an open book.
I came to him
all stressed out about telling him
but he had the most amazing
reaction ever and he was so...
there for me,
and like, helped me.
And then he talked
to the principal
and that teacher is no longer there
to threaten me
and I felt so comfortable
and protected,
to tell him everything.
Eden, is that
what really happened?
He does the best he can,
and 's
successful. Very.
Amir, do you work at a greengrocer's
every afternoon?
No.
-Really?
Because that's what
this complaint says.
A complaint?
Who filed one?
Was it your choice to work there?
-I don't work at a greengrocer's.
Amir, you can answer her.
It's all right.
Okay.
Dad made me work there, 'cause
I spent a lot of money on my phone.
But I work there now
because I want to make money
I want to be a millionaire.
If you want to be a millionaire,
you have to work hard at school.
Come on, Shoshi...
None of the great millionaires
and billionaires finished grade school.
George Carlin, Seinfeld,
Chris Rock,
they all had street smarts.
He'll learn more at a greengrocer's.
That's what you tell your kids? -That's
what someone should've told you, Dalit.
You studied hard at school
and you're no millionaire, let's face it.
You've got to realize
that this humor of yours
might be good for your hobby...
-It's not a hobby.
Humor is my profession.
High-tech is the hobby.
This humor of yours,
the children lack the mental tools
to understand it.
Let's agree to disagree, Shoshi.
I also feel that what
you find to be funny
isn't making anyone here laugh.
-Definitely not.
What kind of an example
are you giving these children,
when you turn any issue
of life or death into a joke?
Okay, we're through.
Let's go.
Let's go.
-We're not through.
Shoshi, are you my wife?
Check and see if you're my wife.
I'm not accepting any criticism
from you two about my humor.
It's not your profession
or your specialty, okay?
Your behavior is inappropriate
to this place.
I'm a happy and funny father,
and show my kids the happy path.
And if you two have issues with
my humor, I don't care, okay? Screw off.
Come on, we're out of here.
We're leaving. Now.
You got a little carried away.
-At least I'm funny.
Okay, it'll go in your file. -He's funny.
That's the most important thing to him.
Oren,
I have a traitor in the system,
someone who's close to me.
What? Is this more of your nonsense
and hallucinations about Tamar?
Someone's squealing on me
to Welfare.
Why, did they say anything?
Did they call?
They hinted at things.
They knew things
they weren't supposed to.
How did they know
about Shir's thing?
I think it's Grandma Leah.
She spends a lot of time with the kids.
She talks to them, makes them talk.
She's a historiographer.
They know the work.
Why would their grandma squeal on you?
You're losing it, bro.
Oren, give me your phone
I want to make a call.
To who?
-It has to do with the kids.
I'm calling Leah
and you're going to talk to her.
About what?
Get the info. Let's see
if she's Welfare's informer.
I don't want to talk to her.
-Come on, please.
Guy, I don't want to talk to her.
-Talk to her.
Man, I can't stand her.
-But you gotta get her to talk.
I don't want to talk to her.
-Hi, Oren, what's up?
Leah, how are you, sweetheart?
I'm just finishing my packing and...
I'm leaving in a few hours.
I'm flying to Wisconsin.
Are you with the kids?
-What's in Wisconsin?
There are bars, mini-bars,
liquor stores...
A convention about modern
anti-Semitism in the US. -I see.
Say, did anyone from
Welfare talk to you?
Why?
A little early for me, isn't
control my sphincters, dear.
You know what I mean.
About the kids and Guy.
Why? What's wrong?
Are they interested in widowers now?
Not just widowers.
It's because of what happened
with Jonathan.
Oh, I didn't think about that.
So what do they want?
I don't know...
Maybe they think he needs help.
As soon as I come back,
I can have the kids over
for a few days
and we'll take care of
Okay, sweetie,
I've got to go.
Take care of yourself and the kids.
-Okay.
Kisses, bye.
-Bye, Leah.
Why did you tell her
about the inquiry?
You asked me to talk to her!
I wanted you to get her to talk
not give her information.
Now she'll start showing up
and interrogating the kids.
You're such a retard.
-I'm a retard?
Yes. -You're suspicious
of your kids' grandma and I'm stupid?
Maybe it's one of the kids.
-My kids don't squeal. They're loyal.
I think it's a good idea for the kids
to be at Leah's part of the week.
Yeah, right. . .
Nonsense.
Leah's a cold woman.
She never hugged Tamar as a child
never told her she loved her.
She only thought of her career.
Took Tamar years
to get over her.
Tamar was amazing.
I guess you don't always need
kisses and hugs.
Nonsense.
Okay.
-Hey, what's up with the garlic?
What a bastard!
What a dick!
Get a load of this.
This generation has no values.
A collector's car. Look at this.
It's not an SUV.
What's the deal?
Oren, they stole the emblem.
Bastard. Piece of shit.
Why do something like this?
I don't get it.
This car is jinxed, huh? I saw
it was in an accident a few months ago.
Yeah.
-How are the people who were injured?
People? -A man and a woman were
in the car, as reported to the police.
Hey, Yoav,
you don't remember that well.
People?
A woman was injured.
Who called in
to report the accident?
Did you read the file, Oren?
-No.
Oren, are you lying to me?
After all I did for you?
When I visited you at rehab and you asked me
if Michal Solomon was getting some
on the side, what did I say?
-The truth, but this is different.
How so? -It's an accident,
people get confused, stressed.
So someone called in and said
there were two people injured, so what?
It just means that someone
got mixed up, right?
Or someone saw a bystander
taking care of the woman
and thought he was part of the accident.
There are a million possibilities. -Oren,
if there was someone with her that night
I want to find that person.
And break his bones?
-No way.
I want to know if she said
anything important before she died.
You want to hear the truth?
She suffered.
When your car flips over
and you die from it, it's no fun.
Can you tell me who the person
who called in was? Did you find him?
Our best detectives are dropping
all their other assignments
to take care of this case right now.
-Not everything's a joke, okay?
My wife died
in that accident.
I'm sorry.
-Thank you.
Can you check and see the number
of the person who called... -No, Guy.
He's not giving you any numbers.
You're not gonna harass some poor
witness who reported the accident.
All you want to hear is that
she cheated on you, huh? -No way.
I want to know the truth.
I want to know what this marriage was.
Bullshit, you just want to hear
that she was corrupted
so you can go and fuck Dana Chen
and then you'll have an excuse,
instead of just going and fucking Dana Khen.
I feel like slapping you.
Who wants Dana Khen?
Why are you talking about her now?
That's what you want to hear, you loser.
You're a disgrace to our family.
Your libido's out of order.
You started masturbating at 19
and you only did that
out of peer pressure.
Shut up, go home and wait for Welfare.
Stop making yourself paranoid.
Oren!
-Here's Oren!
your car-park ticket.
It was parked for a week,
am I supposed to pay for that?
Hey, man, how can I help you?
I need a really big favor.
I need the hard disk
that's hooked up to your security cameras.
A few months ago
there was a fatal accident nearby.
My wife died in that accident.
And we're having
a memorial for her.
She has 5 kids.
She was here 5 minutes
before she died,
so you have
the last footage ever taken of her
which I want
to show her children.
I understand, bro,
but I've only been here for a month.
I can't get you the cameras, sorry.
Understand?
What's your name?
-Alex. -Alex?
Look, Alex, I'm...
a police social worker. I can have
a police car follow you home every day
and check if you stop
at every stop sign on the way
if you make a full stop
and if you always park legally.
And if you don't, you'll get fined.
I can send minors
who are secret police agents to buy liquor.
You won't remember
this conversation,
it'll take you by surprise.
And you know what they do
to people like you in jail?
Have you ever seen
people like you who were in jail?
Read books about
people who were in jail?
Want me to take you
down to the station now?
They'll tell you what happens
to guys like you in prison showers.
There are no showers,
it happens in front of everyone.
Now I'm...
going to put 200 shekels here.
Take it,
I don't need your money.
Take it, it's all right
-I don't need it, thanks.
Just saying "please"
could've worked.
Okay, I just thought that...
That I don't understand
because I work at a gas station?
I'm getting my BA in Sustainability.
-Wow, what's that?
How we save the environment
while maintaining progress.
I work with autistic kids.
-Wow. -Yeah.
Wow.
-Yeah.
Amazing.
I'll text my boss and find out
about that hard disk for you.
That story about your wife
really touched me
and I see that you're desperate.
-Really desperate.
But... -I'm really desperate.
-Wait here.
Thank you.
-We'll see what she says.
Thank you so much, Alex.
How long do they keep
the footage on the hard disk?
No more than 4 months.
Fuck, I was so close.
She filled up there
a few minutes before the accident.
I saw it on her card.
What a bummer.
But that's not what will stop me
and my software.
You know how they record
everything on the same disk?
So the footage is here,
I salvaged it. But Nehama,
this is your last chance to stop.
I don't think
you should see this.
Why not? -You're going to see
your wife just before she died,
you understand?
It's not an easy thing.
Nehama, it's time
to get up and leave the casino.
Come on, let me see
I told you.
Is he hugging her?
Are they getting into our
Can you make this any clearer?
Is there any software
that can help me identify him?
Only time-travel.
And your company
doesn't offer that, huh?
I bathed Itai and put him to bed.
I'm going out.
Leave my money alone.
Come here, Shir.
Come here,
I want to show you something.
That's not a good idea.
-Do you think...
Does it look like
they're hugging here?
I don't know.
How can you tell?
Who are these people?
-It doesn't matter.
You're hitting me!
You're an abusive father!
I don't want you to see this,
are you crazy?
Is that Mom?
Why are you watching this?
You think Mom hugged someone?
She didn't hug anyone or anything,
it's all nonsense.
You think Mom hugged other people?
-No, of course not.
No way.
Why are you asking me
these questions?
I'm not your wife
or your girlfriend.
I'm your daughter,
you asshole.
Ask your girlfriend Dana,
not me.
I'm not in touch with Dana
who cares about Dana?
You don't realize the traumas
you're giving me.
I'm ready to start puking
after meals because of you.
Oh yeah? And what about me?
You think I want this life?
You guys will have families and people
I'm always without her. Always.
I don't get why people feel sorry
for you guys. You've got a father.
I'm always alone.
This is the bride,
hunk.
What are you doing here, Nehama?
-I'm here to save you.
There's nothing to save me from.
Wait, do you know him?
This is Oren Nehama.
So you're not the stripper?
I don't get it.
Nehama, get out of here now.
First hear me out,
then do whatever you want.
Remember our talks
at high school?
You always said
you didn't believe in God,
in reincarnation
or in karma,
but that you did believe
in soulmates.
I was 16.
-You were never 16.
You were always an old soul,
like me.
I still remember your explanation
from high school.
Out of the 100 souls,
50 live here.
And out of those 50,
25 are at the right age.
And out of the 25,
5 are available
and out of those 5,
only two are men.
Marrying one of them
is a one-in-a-million chance.
I know I hurt you
and I know I broke your heart 100 times
and you broke mine only twice.
I deserve to be punished.
But if you punish me
and marry him,
you' ll regret
your whole life.
In a month, a year, two years,
you'll regret it, Michali.
Because you and me.
Stop, don't say
We're soulmates.
And that baby in your belly
will look like me.
And that kid will grow up
and he'll be like me, he'll like soccer
and like me, he'll cry after losses,
and he'll cry at movies.
-Excuse me, who are you?
You're not following the situation.
I'm Michal's soulmate.
Oren, this is Mini,
my future husband Rafi's sister.
What an amateur. Who invites the
groom's sister to a bachelorette party?
Come here, you jerk.
Are you clean?
You know I can't do drugs since India.
Nehama, are you clean?
I'm asking if you're available.
Divorced, available, unwedded?
Does your wife know that
we're eloping and having a baby?
Let's go see her now,
we'll tell her together.
Let's run away to Brazil
for a month.
That won't happen.
-It's gotta happen.
They've got Zika in Brazil.
Then let's run away to Estonia,
let's run away to South Africa
let's run away to Barcelona,
let's run away to Amsterdam
let's run away.
Let' s.
n I touch your belly?
Give it up for the next artist,
my dear bro, his name's Guy Nehama!
Zion Balili!
Thank you.
You there, how old are you?
-19. -20.
Kids.
Are you two a couple?
-Yes.
How long?
-10 months.
A long time.
'A long time.
You've got some nerve.
j eopi ou no^
You're an amateur.
Has she gotten up in the morning
angry at you for no reason yet?
Hasn't started, has
Do you see her eating sometimes
and wish she'd choke?
You guys haven't even started!
Do you want kids?
-Yeah.
You've got some nerve.
People have children
without knowing anything.
A dog checks out a bitch more than
you checked her out. Starts sniffing her...
She gives him a urine sample
and tells him:
"Go attack a dog. If you kill him,
I'll have a baby with you."
But with men and women,
she says: "Look, he's a Scorpio
"I was totally drunk,
so we made Yogev."
You have no idea
who she really is.
In a few years she'll wake up mad
because she had a dream
and in it,
you were doing something wrong.
"I dreamt a hottie hit on you." You wanna
say: "What was she doing in your dream?"
She's a crook.
Thank you guys very much.
They only check divorced parents
for compatibility when it's too late.
The kid's out by then.
They aren't gonna call up the kid and go:
"You're coming with us.
"You have no dad."
That doesn't work.
The dad always starts relaying messages
to the social worker via social media.
"Here I am up north, hiking
with my sweeties. Very normal."
"Here I am, buckling up
his booster seat. He's 15.
That was good!
What an amazing night.
You were incredible, man. -Thanks.
Bye, bro.
Nehama, you surprised me.
You were incredible.
You're amazing, that was really good.
-I surprised you?
Don't I always make you laugh?
I thought we'd meet up
after the show.
Hey, Victor.
-I don't feel comfortable.
I told the guys so many stories
about you, they want to see you.
Why don't you turn around
and come back?
Come on.
Come on.
No, I...
I can't, I'm not alone.
Oh, I thought you came
with a girlfriend.
No, I actually came
with somebody.
Really? Oh.
Is it serious?
I'm ovulating today,
we're gonna make a baby.
Okay.
Just kidding,
it's our first date.
He's really hot.
Tall, muscular. Just my type.
Well, have a nice
ovulation with Robocop.
Next time, I'll be happy
to do a victory round with the gang.
Say, are you mad at me?
No. Why?
Because it feels that way.
Actually, I am.
Why? -Why?
Because you're annoying.
Arik tells you you're a QA man
because of me and you believe him?
Weren't you in that meeting
about the QA person with him?
I was, but it really didn't
come out the way I planned it.
He was supposed to talk to you...
-Great show.
And shake you up because you're annoying
sometimes, but he went at you full speed.
Listen, I've got to get back
to Robocop,
wouldn't want him to turn off.
He has an on/off switch on his back
you can find it easily.
Happy ovulation.
Did your grandpa die here?
Someone dies in every apartment.
It has no meaning.
Why don't you stay awhile?
We'll sleep a little
and then you'll go back.
I've got to be there,
I just left awkwardly.
Gave some excuse
and left.
Do you love me?
At your age and your beauty
everyone loves you.
It's a meaningless question.
So will you still love me
when I'm old?
Again, you'll be so famous,
successful and with a great voice
that I will, sure.
You realize that in our relationship
I'm the matu re one
and you're the stupid little kid.
-As in every man-woman relationship.
Do you remember that poem
I taught you, by Walt Whitman?
"Even when the storm of youth subsided,
"and wintry old age
clung to her hair,
"the low trees still continued
to bow for her.
In a blind crowd,
he'd always notice her,
"she was his,
"and he was hers."
be back.
Honey?
You scared me.
Why? Did you think I was
from the tenants' committee?
We need to talk.
You went to her bachelorette party
even though I asked you not to.
So you remembered your teenage story
about being soulmates
and she left with you,
didn't she?
You're telling it as if...
-I'm telling it as it is.
She left her bachelorette party
in the middle and went with you.
You know why?
Because she's crazy?
No.
Because she's lame.
She watched too many Disney movies
and believed them.
You know she cheated on Rafi with you
because she was looking for a thrill.
Now she's leaving him
because she's bored with herself.
She's boring .
How do you not fall asleep
while talking to her?
She told Rafi
they were soulmates, too.
Kind of weird, isn't it? That the girl
keeps running into soulmates.
You don't believe in soulmates?
-Of course I do.
But it's not 100 or 50.
It's one,
in the whole world.
Get me a knife from the kitchen.
-Why?
Get me one, sweetie, don't be scared.
-I don't want to.
You know I'll cut myself for you.
She won't do anything for you
she just wants
to take care of you
and patronize you.
You and me,
we're the same.
People used to tell us that
we're crazy. But you know what?
We're just people
who are living our weaknesses.
When you wake up at night
from your anxieties,
she'll look at you
and pity you.
She'll feel better about herself,
through you.
She can't even understand what it is
to be you. -You don't know her.
Yeah?
There were lots of girlfriends
at her party,
they were doing coke
and got crazy and called a stripper...
Okay, so you know her a little.
You and me, we're here.
We ' re he re .
You're always here,
aren't you?
I'm always here, sweetie.
You'll fall asleep in bed with her.
Was there anything
in our love and our sex
that you wanted and I didn't know it
before you asked for it?
She's not even close to being in your league
-Thanks a lot.
It's all right.
Go with her.
Go.
But you'll come back to me.
The question is just how long
it'll take us for you to realize it.
Honey, why? Why?
Why?
Why?
We promised we weren't doing this, right?
Why?
Hold on, hold on.
Shir?
Is there a Shir Nehama here?
I'm looking for Shir Nehama.
Shir!
Nehama, what's up?
Where's your lovely wife?
It's over between us.
-Dad, you jerk.
What's up? -We suspect your daughter
had a convulsive attack.
We have to leave her here
for additional tests.
Is it viral? Bacterial?
What could it be?
It might be nothing,
might be viral,
and it might also be
a first epileptic seizure. -At 16.5?
When she was little, we sat her up
before she could crawl.
That's unrelated, right?
-Right.
Her diet's unbalanced, it sucks.
-Dad, listen. It's none of those things.
I was just acting.
-What do you mean?
There were some men on the street
hassling me, so I went...
Then they called an ambulance
and brought me here.
Shir, you're crazy.
You killed me.
I sped all the way here,
I had a heart attack because of you.
What were you doing there?
Shir. Where are you?
I feel like I'm losing you.
I can't lose you.
Dad.
I'm fine,
okay?
Take me home.
-Thank you.
You're paying for this ambulance.
You're starting to babysit, I don't care.
Completely nuts.
Nehama.
-What's up, Dana?
It's Friday.
Aren't you going home?
I've got to put in some extra time,
I barely worked this week.
And Shir found a way of coming home
from Tel Aviv. In an ambulance.
300 bucks.
I know,
we message back and forth on WhatsApp.
Then tell her to walk next time.
Bye, Nehama.
Bye, Dana.
You can't take a bath.
-Eden, get out of here.
Dad told me to make sure
you don't take a bath.
You're not my mom.
I was acting, now get out of here.
Eden, Eden.
This is so cool. Amir stuck this pot
onto my head with polyurethane foam.
Amir, you asshole!
Now we have to cut off
all your hair!
Really? -Or do you want
to go to school like this?
As if you don't have enough social issues.
Why are you laughing, Amir?
Coming.
Hi, sweetie.
-Hi.
Are you playing with a pot on your head?
-Not really.
Amir stuck a pot on my head with
polyurethane foam. -Come here, Jonathan.
But Eden said...
-What did she say?
That we have to cut off all my hair,
and if you put more... -Come on, Jonathan.
Is your dad here, sweeties?
-He's at work or something.
Jonathan.
-I won't have any hair, I'll be bald.
So what?
-But...
We have to put some more on.
-You're an abusive brother.
No, I'm not.
-You're an abusive brother.
When's he coming home, sweeties?
-I don't know, he's late or something.
Come on.
-No, no...
I'll tell Dad.
-What will you tell him? -That...
Jonathan. . .
-I'll be bald.
You're not strong enough.
I am strong enough!
-Ami r!
Amir! Dad!
What's wrong?
-Amir! Amir!
Amir! Amir!
Jonathan!
Jonathan!
Ami r !
Amir!
I can't hold her!
-Move, move!
Lift her legs up, sweetie.
Come, come, come.
It's all right.
Get me a towel, please.
It's all right.
It's all right.
Relax, relax, breathe.
Dear god, Relax.
where's your father?
Edna.
Shir is in the hospital with Oren.
It's epilepsy.
Lots of people have it.
It's all right.
Dad, Welfare was here.
They caught us off guard.
I won't let anyone
take you away from me.
You hear me?
You're all sleeping in my room tonight
we'll make a tent together.
It's all right.
5 times a day.
Eden faxes them online.
Girl's a genius.
She talked to them too,
posing as the aunt.
And who's in charge of new crosswalks
in the municipality?
Amikam Bukboza, remember him?
His dad was the super.
We'd tease him because his dad stuttered
and his mom was disabled.
Unlucky family. And it's the most
dangerous intersection in the country.
I tell them they've got
to put a crosswalk here
and he just won't approve it.
So here I am at 3 a.m. ,
working instead of them.
Why aren't you saying anything?
I don't want to bother you
in the middle of parental capacity.
Are you crazy? I'm your brother.
Tell me what's going on.
Michal Solomon's getting married and she
keeps messaging me on Instagram.
Right, she opened that account
to get her messages across to you.
Social network was founded
so that girls in bikinis
can get their messages across to you
through their cleavages.
What's your problem? Go this way.
What's the big deal?
Go on !
I'll paint you!
Go on, you dimwit!
Get a load of that asshole.
That's Israel for you.
And what if it's my baby
in her belly?
This baby's destiny is getting changed
without anyone asking its permission.
Instead of growing up with his fathe
who cares and thinks about him,
he'll grow up with...
-Someone sane?
Is that really that bad?
So you're saying that if someone
could raise your kids better than you
you'd give them away?
Just let it go, Oren.
You have an amazing wife who loves you
and looks great,
if you're into neurotic redheads.
Why get hung up on Michal Solomon?
Forget about it. Get me the stop sign.
Got a great idea for a story.
From early on, Vicky Bukaukau
had strong social awareness.
Born to a poor family, she remembered
the humiliation as she asked:
"Who sends us boxes every Friday?"
Cola!
can't believe it
For 30 years, Vicky worked
as a midwife in a hospital.
She knew that a person's glass ceiling
was set the second he was born:
Who'd be poor
and who'd be rich.
So occasionally, she liked
to mess with people's fortunes.
But the truth eventually comes out
and despite what people tend to think,
that's usually not a good thing.
It is well known that eye color changes
by the age of five.
When blue-eyed parents
all over the country
start reporting
having brown-eyed children,
a Health Ministry inquiry is conducted.
Soon enough, one name links all the cases
of kidnapping: Vicky Bukaukau.
Vicky Bukaukau!
11 years after the birth
of their firstborn,
the Arbels hear a knock
at the door.
They open it.
A policeman and a social worker
explain the horrible hitch:
son was switched at birth.
Turns out their son had been growing up
for 11 years
in the village of Dro'a El-Jarbiyya,
under the name of Munjid Kassim Al-Azizi.
Munjid, come home.
Their son Yali
moves to Dro'a.
Dad, don't let him
touch my PlayStation!
His attention disorder goes away
but rage fills him.
He eventually becomes leader
of the Northern Galilee's Islamic party.
The Arbels are left with Munjid.
He enters
the large and forbidding Jewish house
places he had dreamt of entering
only as a burglar or a plumber.
At night,
he turns to Allah for help.
"Almighty Allah...
The dad who worked with the Aerospace
Industries for so many years can't calm down
You know this means that
my security clearance is kaput.
He's going to murder us all. It's ISIS.
-You're talking nonsense.
What's that?
-What?
If he tries anything,
I'll spray him in the face.
I want you to get the Filipina
to sleep down here tonight.
"Almighty Allah,
in the name of merciful God...
But to their surprise, a few weeks later,
things looked completely different.
Guys, Munjid is a gift.
He's an amazing kid,
does everything that Danny tells him to.
He comes from a patriarchal family.
Fathers are fully respected there.
When Danny comes back from work
Munjid brings him slippers
and makes him Turkish coffee
just the way he likes it.
Yogev used to curse me
and Na'ama. -Yes.
And he has no social problems
at school.
If he has a problem,
he solves it on his own.
Yes, he's an old-fashioned kid,
who gives respect.
Where is he?
Look at that.
He's making us a roast for dinner tonight.
Sacrificial feast.
I love you, beloved son.
-Mommy's sweet boy.
What a kid.
What a kid.
No, stay back there.
-You lashed out last time.
Okay.
Nehama, I felt
throughout the process
that you're not really.
- Look he re, Shosh...
Excuse me,
I'm not done.
Oh, sorry.
That you don't really understand
the parental capacity assessment.
I suggest you take it seriously.
Neither of you has any right to judge me.
I'm on my own with 5 kids,
that's a great assessment of my parental
capacity, as you callously call it.
Have either of you stayed
with 5 kids for more than 5 minutes?
Nehama... -That's exactly
what we want to assess,
if you're truly capable of running
this whole process on your own.
After Jonathan tried... -To kill himself.
For the thousandth time.
Is this the first family
where someone took sleeping pills?
If I were a woman,
would anyone be checking me now?
We do many times. -Only in the midst
of a dirty divorce process,
not like this, where you two
show up in the middle of my life.
I'm a great father.
You know what I did last night?
I painted a crosswalk and hung a stop sign
at the corner next to the kids' school.
I don't have a car and they walk to school
so I was scared.
And I even found
a spread for Jonathan's sandwich.
I take olive oil and ketchup
and mix it with parsley,
it' s the only way
he'll eat leafy greens.
Everything will be taken into account.
You have many admirable sides, Nehama.
I also managed to solve
the laundry sorting issue.
I have an 85% success rate,
so I still have a ways to go.
And I tell them I love them every night
wheneve r.
Even if I have a show, I call them
and tell them I love them.
Why don't you write down
the good things?
Is it true that your daughter
had an affair with her teacher?
What?
-Is this affair even
And is it true that Amir
ran over his grandfather?
He's driving with no license, at his age?
-Where did you hear that?
It's all not true,
by the way.
It's material
that I make up for shows.
Oh, so you tell jokes
about the children?
You're just taking things out of context.
It's what artists do.
I take material from life,
distort it and use it.
For money.
-Again...
What's up with you?
You keep distorting what I say.
Nehama, we're very concerned.
We think that despite all your efforts
we should introduce another legal guardian.
- But I'm not a j unkie.
What about Tamar's mother?
Your parents? Perhaps your brother?
Oren? He's a retard.
-He's a psychologist, isn't he?
He's a police social worker who got
kicked out of an SAT prep course.
What are the job requirements?
Partial knowledge of the Hebrew language?
I wouldn't let him
watch my goldfish.
Listen, I take care of him.
He's like my sixth child.
Don't bring him into this,
it'll stress him out.
We're going to pay you
a surprise visit soon.
But I'm not a junkie!
-Start treating it seriously, Nehama.
I really hope there's no affair between
a grown man and a minor girl in your family
because that could cast a heavy shadow
on your fatherhood, okay?
Okay.
Thank you so very much.
Good day.
-That's Israel for you...
Shir. -What? -Clean the house
get it in order right now.
Ask Amir. -Shir, it's an emergency.
The Nazis are coming to raid our house.
Who? -The parental capacity committee.
They're gonna take away your siblings.
And is that bad? -What?!
-Dad, we're falling apart.
It looks like you need a vacation.
-There are no vacations from kids.
Go over the house,
hide any rotten food,
all the dirty clothes
and any sharp objects.
And shower Jonathan and Amir, okay?
I'll hose them down in the yard.
It's most effective.
Whatever you think, I trust you.
-I wish I could say it's mutual.
And Shir. . .
What?
The thing with the teacher...
Is it over?
Oh my god,
for the thousandth time,
nothing happened
with any teacher. -Shir,
this it's is money-time,
an emergency.
You've got to end it now,
if you haven't yet. Promise me.
The teacher's dead, Dad.
Don't worry.
Good.
See you, sweetie.
Nehama,
what are you doing here?
Hey, Michali. That's funny,
what are you doing here?
I live around here.
What are you doing here?
I saw on Instagram that
you're pregnant. Congrats.
can I touch your belly?
There's no belly yet.
-Of course there is.
Michal and I are trying now, too.
-Oh. -Yeah, but...
seems she has fertility issues.
How long have you been trying?
Two months.
But you know me,
I'm impatient,
so we told our doctor
that we've been at it for two years.
Now, get this.
They sent me
for these genetic tests.
Oh, great.
Thing is, I didn't ask for them.
As a doctor,
did you do something behind my back and
send me to these tests without my knowing?
What?
Why would I do that?
Because you think the baby is mine,
just like I do.
Okay...
the dates exactly
and you're anxious and a control freak.
-You're crazy, Oren.
You're a reta rd,
you're a sick man.
Look me in the eyes, Michail. Tell me
you didn't send me to take those tests.
They send everyone
who starts fertility treatments,
which are redundant, by the way,
if you only started two months ago!
So you're saying I'm paranoid and imagining
that you're sending me to get tested?
Yes.
Yes, Nehama.
So I was just having these crazy thoughts
and preparing speeches...
You sure you didn't send me?
Did you follow me here?
Of course.
You're not answering me.
We made a mistake.
We had sex twice... -Three times.
I betrayed my best friend twice.
-Three times.
But I'm getting married now.
You can't get married.
-Why not?
You're married, I'll be married too.
I've been with him for 7 years.
Because the baby is mine.
-He's not, Oren. I swear he's not. 100%.
And stop talking about it,
don't mention it again.
Can I touch your belly?
Amir, tell them
you're going to focus at school.
That you're going on Ritalin.
Repeat after me...
I'm starting . . .
-I'm starting to focus at school.
I work at a greengrocer's,
I'm in a class for gifted kids.
I'm okay, Shir .
-Don't mention the greengrocer's.
You're home every afternoon with me
and Eden, doing your homework.
Understand?
-Yes .
Eden, you're ready.
You were born ready.
I don't feel comfortable lying.
-Eden, open your eyes.
Telling the truth
is for the privileged.
Johnny, look at me.
You know what you have to say, right?
-That I'm happy.
Good.
Otherwise, they'll take Dad away too.
And what are you going to tell them
about what you're doing, Shir?
Shut up, Eden.
-What's up, guys? -It's all good.
Sorry I'm late.
Things were crazy at work.
Everyone's bathed and ready.
-Good job.
I'm going to leave you 50% of the house,
and the rest will share what's left.
Don't be stressed.
I've done thousands
of presentations.
We go in there
and tell our truth.
We're a cool family and that'll win
the day. I'll make them laugh
and we'll be out of there in a few minutes
with the "Grand Slam," okay?
Who's watching Itai?!
Just kidding, he's at Grandma's.
See? Humor works.
It releases tension.
Shoshi and Dalit,
as you can see,
the kids are doing great.
Eve rything's
And let's start with Jonathan.
Why don't you tell them what you told me?
Um, I'm great.
Everything's fine, it won't happen again.
And I'm happy.
Tell them the truth.
That's the truth.
-Okay, but you're not happy.
'm not happy eithe
We all miss Mom.
Only psychopaths or the mentally ill
would feel happy at this point.
We don't like the use of the term
"the mentally ill" here.
Cool, and I didn't like
"parental capacity."
Our dad is always on top of things,
he always knows what's up.
I went to see him
because a teacher in school
harassed me
and he just read me
like an open book.
I came to him
all stressed out about telling him
but he had the most amazing
reaction ever and he was so...
there for me,
and like, helped me.
And then he talked
to the principal
and that teacher is no longer there
to threaten me
and I felt so comfortable
and protected,
to tell him everything.
Eden, is that
what really happened?
He does the best he can,
and 's
successful. Very.
Amir, do you work at a greengrocer's
every afternoon?
No.
-Really?
Because that's what
this complaint says.
A complaint?
Who filed one?
Was it your choice to work there?
-I don't work at a greengrocer's.
Amir, you can answer her.
It's all right.
Okay.
Dad made me work there, 'cause
I spent a lot of money on my phone.
But I work there now
because I want to make money
I want to be a millionaire.
If you want to be a millionaire,
you have to work hard at school.
Come on, Shoshi...
None of the great millionaires
and billionaires finished grade school.
George Carlin, Seinfeld,
Chris Rock,
they all had street smarts.
He'll learn more at a greengrocer's.
That's what you tell your kids? -That's
what someone should've told you, Dalit.
You studied hard at school
and you're no millionaire, let's face it.
You've got to realize
that this humor of yours
might be good for your hobby...
-It's not a hobby.
Humor is my profession.
High-tech is the hobby.
This humor of yours,
the children lack the mental tools
to understand it.
Let's agree to disagree, Shoshi.
I also feel that what
you find to be funny
isn't making anyone here laugh.
-Definitely not.
What kind of an example
are you giving these children,
when you turn any issue
of life or death into a joke?
Okay, we're through.
Let's go.
Let's go.
-We're not through.
Shoshi, are you my wife?
Check and see if you're my wife.
I'm not accepting any criticism
from you two about my humor.
It's not your profession
or your specialty, okay?
Your behavior is inappropriate
to this place.
I'm a happy and funny father,
and show my kids the happy path.
And if you two have issues with
my humor, I don't care, okay? Screw off.
Come on, we're out of here.
We're leaving. Now.
You got a little carried away.
-At least I'm funny.
Okay, it'll go in your file. -He's funny.
That's the most important thing to him.
Oren,
I have a traitor in the system,
someone who's close to me.
What? Is this more of your nonsense
and hallucinations about Tamar?
Someone's squealing on me
to Welfare.
Why, did they say anything?
Did they call?
They hinted at things.
They knew things
they weren't supposed to.
How did they know
about Shir's thing?
I think it's Grandma Leah.
She spends a lot of time with the kids.
She talks to them, makes them talk.
She's a historiographer.
They know the work.
Why would their grandma squeal on you?
You're losing it, bro.
Oren, give me your phone
I want to make a call.
To who?
-It has to do with the kids.
I'm calling Leah
and you're going to talk to her.
About what?
Get the info. Let's see
if she's Welfare's informer.
I don't want to talk to her.
-Come on, please.
Guy, I don't want to talk to her.
-Talk to her.
Man, I can't stand her.
-But you gotta get her to talk.
I don't want to talk to her.
-Hi, Oren, what's up?
Leah, how are you, sweetheart?
I'm just finishing my packing and...
I'm leaving in a few hours.
I'm flying to Wisconsin.
Are you with the kids?
-What's in Wisconsin?
There are bars, mini-bars,
liquor stores...
A convention about modern
anti-Semitism in the US. -I see.
Say, did anyone from
Welfare talk to you?
Why?
A little early for me, isn't
control my sphincters, dear.
You know what I mean.
About the kids and Guy.
Why? What's wrong?
Are they interested in widowers now?
Not just widowers.
It's because of what happened
with Jonathan.
Oh, I didn't think about that.
So what do they want?
I don't know...
Maybe they think he needs help.
As soon as I come back,
I can have the kids over
for a few days
and we'll take care of
Okay, sweetie,
I've got to go.
Take care of yourself and the kids.
-Okay.
Kisses, bye.
-Bye, Leah.
Why did you tell her
about the inquiry?
You asked me to talk to her!
I wanted you to get her to talk
not give her information.
Now she'll start showing up
and interrogating the kids.
You're such a retard.
-I'm a retard?
Yes. -You're suspicious
of your kids' grandma and I'm stupid?
Maybe it's one of the kids.
-My kids don't squeal. They're loyal.
I think it's a good idea for the kids
to be at Leah's part of the week.
Yeah, right. . .
Nonsense.
Leah's a cold woman.
She never hugged Tamar as a child
never told her she loved her.
She only thought of her career.
Took Tamar years
to get over her.
Tamar was amazing.
I guess you don't always need
kisses and hugs.
Nonsense.
Okay.
-Hey, what's up with the garlic?
What a bastard!
What a dick!
Get a load of this.
This generation has no values.
A collector's car. Look at this.
It's not an SUV.
What's the deal?
Oren, they stole the emblem.
Bastard. Piece of shit.
Why do something like this?
I don't get it.
This car is jinxed, huh? I saw
it was in an accident a few months ago.
Yeah.
-How are the people who were injured?
People? -A man and a woman were
in the car, as reported to the police.
Hey, Yoav,
you don't remember that well.
People?
A woman was injured.
Who called in
to report the accident?
Did you read the file, Oren?
-No.
Oren, are you lying to me?
After all I did for you?
When I visited you at rehab and you asked me
if Michal Solomon was getting some
on the side, what did I say?
-The truth, but this is different.
How so? -It's an accident,
people get confused, stressed.
So someone called in and said
there were two people injured, so what?
It just means that someone
got mixed up, right?
Or someone saw a bystander
taking care of the woman
and thought he was part of the accident.
There are a million possibilities. -Oren,
if there was someone with her that night
I want to find that person.
And break his bones?
-No way.
I want to know if she said
anything important before she died.
You want to hear the truth?
She suffered.
When your car flips over
and you die from it, it's no fun.
Can you tell me who the person
who called in was? Did you find him?
Our best detectives are dropping
all their other assignments
to take care of this case right now.
-Not everything's a joke, okay?
My wife died
in that accident.
I'm sorry.
-Thank you.
Can you check and see the number
of the person who called... -No, Guy.
He's not giving you any numbers.
You're not gonna harass some poor
witness who reported the accident.
All you want to hear is that
she cheated on you, huh? -No way.
I want to know the truth.
I want to know what this marriage was.
Bullshit, you just want to hear
that she was corrupted
so you can go and fuck Dana Chen
and then you'll have an excuse,
instead of just going and fucking Dana Khen.
I feel like slapping you.
Who wants Dana Khen?
Why are you talking about her now?
That's what you want to hear, you loser.
You're a disgrace to our family.
Your libido's out of order.
You started masturbating at 19
and you only did that
out of peer pressure.
Shut up, go home and wait for Welfare.
Stop making yourself paranoid.
Oren!
-Here's Oren!
your car-park ticket.
It was parked for a week,
am I supposed to pay for that?
Hey, man, how can I help you?
I need a really big favor.
I need the hard disk
that's hooked up to your security cameras.
A few months ago
there was a fatal accident nearby.
My wife died in that accident.
And we're having
a memorial for her.
She has 5 kids.
She was here 5 minutes
before she died,
so you have
the last footage ever taken of her
which I want
to show her children.
I understand, bro,
but I've only been here for a month.
I can't get you the cameras, sorry.
Understand?
What's your name?
-Alex. -Alex?
Look, Alex, I'm...
a police social worker. I can have
a police car follow you home every day
and check if you stop
at every stop sign on the way
if you make a full stop
and if you always park legally.
And if you don't, you'll get fined.
I can send minors
who are secret police agents to buy liquor.
You won't remember
this conversation,
it'll take you by surprise.
And you know what they do
to people like you in jail?
Have you ever seen
people like you who were in jail?
Read books about
people who were in jail?
Want me to take you
down to the station now?
They'll tell you what happens
to guys like you in prison showers.
There are no showers,
it happens in front of everyone.
Now I'm...
going to put 200 shekels here.
Take it,
I don't need your money.
Take it, it's all right
-I don't need it, thanks.
Just saying "please"
could've worked.
Okay, I just thought that...
That I don't understand
because I work at a gas station?
I'm getting my BA in Sustainability.
-Wow, what's that?
How we save the environment
while maintaining progress.
I work with autistic kids.
-Wow. -Yeah.
Wow.
-Yeah.
Amazing.
I'll text my boss and find out
about that hard disk for you.
That story about your wife
really touched me
and I see that you're desperate.
-Really desperate.
But... -I'm really desperate.
-Wait here.
Thank you.
-We'll see what she says.
Thank you so much, Alex.
How long do they keep
the footage on the hard disk?
No more than 4 months.
Fuck, I was so close.
She filled up there
a few minutes before the accident.
I saw it on her card.
What a bummer.
But that's not what will stop me
and my software.
You know how they record
everything on the same disk?
So the footage is here,
I salvaged it. But Nehama,
this is your last chance to stop.
I don't think
you should see this.
Why not? -You're going to see
your wife just before she died,
you understand?
It's not an easy thing.
Nehama, it's time
to get up and leave the casino.
Come on, let me see
I told you.
Is he hugging her?
Are they getting into our
Can you make this any clearer?
Is there any software
that can help me identify him?
Only time-travel.
And your company
doesn't offer that, huh?
I bathed Itai and put him to bed.
I'm going out.
Leave my money alone.
Come here, Shir.
Come here,
I want to show you something.
That's not a good idea.
-Do you think...
Does it look like
they're hugging here?
I don't know.
How can you tell?
Who are these people?
-It doesn't matter.
You're hitting me!
You're an abusive father!
I don't want you to see this,
are you crazy?
Is that Mom?
Why are you watching this?
You think Mom hugged someone?
She didn't hug anyone or anything,
it's all nonsense.
You think Mom hugged other people?
-No, of course not.
No way.
Why are you asking me
these questions?
I'm not your wife
or your girlfriend.
I'm your daughter,
you asshole.
Ask your girlfriend Dana,
not me.
I'm not in touch with Dana
who cares about Dana?
You don't realize the traumas
you're giving me.
I'm ready to start puking
after meals because of you.
Oh yeah? And what about me?
You think I want this life?
You guys will have families and people
I'm always without her. Always.
I don't get why people feel sorry
for you guys. You've got a father.
I'm always alone.
This is the bride,
hunk.
What are you doing here, Nehama?
-I'm here to save you.
There's nothing to save me from.
Wait, do you know him?
This is Oren Nehama.
So you're not the stripper?
I don't get it.
Nehama, get out of here now.
First hear me out,
then do whatever you want.
Remember our talks
at high school?
You always said
you didn't believe in God,
in reincarnation
or in karma,
but that you did believe
in soulmates.
I was 16.
-You were never 16.
You were always an old soul,
like me.
I still remember your explanation
from high school.
Out of the 100 souls,
50 live here.
And out of those 50,
25 are at the right age.
And out of the 25,
5 are available
and out of those 5,
only two are men.
Marrying one of them
is a one-in-a-million chance.
I know I hurt you
and I know I broke your heart 100 times
and you broke mine only twice.
I deserve to be punished.
But if you punish me
and marry him,
you' ll regret
your whole life.
In a month, a year, two years,
you'll regret it, Michali.
Because you and me.
Stop, don't say
We're soulmates.
And that baby in your belly
will look like me.
And that kid will grow up
and he'll be like me, he'll like soccer
and like me, he'll cry after losses,
and he'll cry at movies.
-Excuse me, who are you?
You're not following the situation.
I'm Michal's soulmate.
Oren, this is Mini,
my future husband Rafi's sister.
What an amateur. Who invites the
groom's sister to a bachelorette party?
Come here, you jerk.
Are you clean?
You know I can't do drugs since India.
Nehama, are you clean?
I'm asking if you're available.
Divorced, available, unwedded?
Does your wife know that
we're eloping and having a baby?
Let's go see her now,
we'll tell her together.
Let's run away to Brazil
for a month.
That won't happen.
-It's gotta happen.
They've got Zika in Brazil.
Then let's run away to Estonia,
let's run away to South Africa
let's run away to Barcelona,
let's run away to Amsterdam
let's run away.
Let' s.
n I touch your belly?
Give it up for the next artist,
my dear bro, his name's Guy Nehama!
Zion Balili!
Thank you.
You there, how old are you?
-19. -20.
Kids.
Are you two a couple?
-Yes.
How long?
-10 months.
A long time.
'A long time.
You've got some nerve.
j eopi ou no^
You're an amateur.
Has she gotten up in the morning
angry at you for no reason yet?
Hasn't started, has
Do you see her eating sometimes
and wish she'd choke?
You guys haven't even started!
Do you want kids?
-Yeah.
You've got some nerve.
People have children
without knowing anything.
A dog checks out a bitch more than
you checked her out. Starts sniffing her...
She gives him a urine sample
and tells him:
"Go attack a dog. If you kill him,
I'll have a baby with you."
But with men and women,
she says: "Look, he's a Scorpio
"I was totally drunk,
so we made Yogev."
You have no idea
who she really is.
In a few years she'll wake up mad
because she had a dream
and in it,
you were doing something wrong.
"I dreamt a hottie hit on you." You wanna
say: "What was she doing in your dream?"
She's a crook.
Thank you guys very much.
They only check divorced parents
for compatibility when it's too late.
The kid's out by then.
They aren't gonna call up the kid and go:
"You're coming with us.
"You have no dad."
That doesn't work.
The dad always starts relaying messages
to the social worker via social media.
"Here I am up north, hiking
with my sweeties. Very normal."
"Here I am, buckling up
his booster seat. He's 15.
That was good!
What an amazing night.
You were incredible, man. -Thanks.
Bye, bro.
Nehama, you surprised me.
You were incredible.
You're amazing, that was really good.
-I surprised you?
Don't I always make you laugh?
I thought we'd meet up
after the show.
Hey, Victor.
-I don't feel comfortable.
I told the guys so many stories
about you, they want to see you.
Why don't you turn around
and come back?
Come on.
Come on.
No, I...
I can't, I'm not alone.
Oh, I thought you came
with a girlfriend.
No, I actually came
with somebody.
Really? Oh.
Is it serious?
I'm ovulating today,
we're gonna make a baby.
Okay.
Just kidding,
it's our first date.
He's really hot.
Tall, muscular. Just my type.
Well, have a nice
ovulation with Robocop.
Next time, I'll be happy
to do a victory round with the gang.
Say, are you mad at me?
No. Why?
Because it feels that way.
Actually, I am.
Why? -Why?
Because you're annoying.
Arik tells you you're a QA man
because of me and you believe him?
Weren't you in that meeting
about the QA person with him?
I was, but it really didn't
come out the way I planned it.
He was supposed to talk to you...
-Great show.
And shake you up because you're annoying
sometimes, but he went at you full speed.
Listen, I've got to get back
to Robocop,
wouldn't want him to turn off.
He has an on/off switch on his back
you can find it easily.
Happy ovulation.
Did your grandpa die here?
Someone dies in every apartment.
It has no meaning.
Why don't you stay awhile?
We'll sleep a little
and then you'll go back.
I've got to be there,
I just left awkwardly.
Gave some excuse
and left.
Do you love me?
At your age and your beauty
everyone loves you.
It's a meaningless question.
So will you still love me
when I'm old?
Again, you'll be so famous,
successful and with a great voice
that I will, sure.
You realize that in our relationship
I'm the matu re one
and you're the stupid little kid.
-As in every man-woman relationship.
Do you remember that poem
I taught you, by Walt Whitman?
"Even when the storm of youth subsided,
"and wintry old age
clung to her hair,
"the low trees still continued
to bow for her.
In a blind crowd,
he'd always notice her,
"she was his,
"and he was hers."
be back.
Honey?
You scared me.
Why? Did you think I was
from the tenants' committee?
We need to talk.
You went to her bachelorette party
even though I asked you not to.
So you remembered your teenage story
about being soulmates
and she left with you,
didn't she?
You're telling it as if...
-I'm telling it as it is.
She left her bachelorette party
in the middle and went with you.
You know why?
Because she's crazy?
No.
Because she's lame.
She watched too many Disney movies
and believed them.
You know she cheated on Rafi with you
because she was looking for a thrill.
Now she's leaving him
because she's bored with herself.
She's boring .
How do you not fall asleep
while talking to her?
She told Rafi
they were soulmates, too.
Kind of weird, isn't it? That the girl
keeps running into soulmates.
You don't believe in soulmates?
-Of course I do.
But it's not 100 or 50.
It's one,
in the whole world.
Get me a knife from the kitchen.
-Why?
Get me one, sweetie, don't be scared.
-I don't want to.
You know I'll cut myself for you.
She won't do anything for you
she just wants
to take care of you
and patronize you.
You and me,
we're the same.
People used to tell us that
we're crazy. But you know what?
We're just people
who are living our weaknesses.
When you wake up at night
from your anxieties,
she'll look at you
and pity you.
She'll feel better about herself,
through you.
She can't even understand what it is
to be you. -You don't know her.
Yeah?
There were lots of girlfriends
at her party,
they were doing coke
and got crazy and called a stripper...
Okay, so you know her a little.
You and me, we're here.
We ' re he re .
You're always here,
aren't you?
I'm always here, sweetie.
You'll fall asleep in bed with her.
Was there anything
in our love and our sex
that you wanted and I didn't know it
before you asked for it?
She's not even close to being in your league
-Thanks a lot.
It's all right.
Go with her.
Go.
But you'll come back to me.
The question is just how long
it'll take us for you to realize it.
Honey, why? Why?
Why?
Why?
We promised we weren't doing this, right?
Why?
Hold on, hold on.
Shir?
Is there a Shir Nehama here?
I'm looking for Shir Nehama.
Shir!
Nehama, what's up?
Where's your lovely wife?
It's over between us.
-Dad, you jerk.
What's up? -We suspect your daughter
had a convulsive attack.
We have to leave her here
for additional tests.
Is it viral? Bacterial?
What could it be?
It might be nothing,
might be viral,
and it might also be
a first epileptic seizure. -At 16.5?
When she was little, we sat her up
before she could crawl.
That's unrelated, right?
-Right.
Her diet's unbalanced, it sucks.
-Dad, listen. It's none of those things.
I was just acting.
-What do you mean?
There were some men on the street
hassling me, so I went...
Then they called an ambulance
and brought me here.
Shir, you're crazy.
You killed me.
I sped all the way here,
I had a heart attack because of you.
What were you doing there?
Shir. Where are you?
I feel like I'm losing you.
I can't lose you.
Dad.
I'm fine,
okay?
Take me home.
-Thank you.
You're paying for this ambulance.
You're starting to babysit, I don't care.
Completely nuts.
Nehama.
-What's up, Dana?
It's Friday.
Aren't you going home?
I've got to put in some extra time,
I barely worked this week.
And Shir found a way of coming home
from Tel Aviv. In an ambulance.
300 bucks.
I know,
we message back and forth on WhatsApp.
Then tell her to walk next time.
Bye, Nehama.
Bye, Dana.
You can't take a bath.
-Eden, get out of here.
Dad told me to make sure
you don't take a bath.
You're not my mom.
I was acting, now get out of here.
Eden, Eden.
This is so cool. Amir stuck this pot
onto my head with polyurethane foam.
Amir, you asshole!
Now we have to cut off
all your hair!
Really? -Or do you want
to go to school like this?
As if you don't have enough social issues.
Why are you laughing, Amir?
Coming.
Hi, sweetie.
-Hi.
Are you playing with a pot on your head?
-Not really.
Amir stuck a pot on my head with
polyurethane foam. -Come here, Jonathan.
But Eden said...
-What did she say?
That we have to cut off all my hair,
and if you put more... -Come on, Jonathan.
Is your dad here, sweeties?
-He's at work or something.
Jonathan.
-I won't have any hair, I'll be bald.
So what?
-But...
We have to put some more on.
-You're an abusive brother.
No, I'm not.
-You're an abusive brother.
When's he coming home, sweeties?
-I don't know, he's late or something.
Come on.
-No, no...
I'll tell Dad.
-What will you tell him? -That...
Jonathan. . .
-I'll be bald.
You're not strong enough.
I am strong enough!
-Ami r!
Amir! Dad!
What's wrong?
-Amir! Amir!
Amir! Amir!
Jonathan!
Jonathan!
Ami r !
Amir!
I can't hold her!
-Move, move!
Lift her legs up, sweetie.
Come, come, come.
It's all right.
Get me a towel, please.
It's all right.
It's all right.
Relax, relax, breathe.
Dear god, Relax.
where's your father?
Edna.
Shir is in the hospital with Oren.
It's epilepsy.
Lots of people have it.
It's all right.
Dad, Welfare was here.
They caught us off guard.
I won't let anyone
take you away from me.
You hear me?
You're all sleeping in my room tonight
we'll make a tent together.
It's all right.