Mystery Science Theater 3000 (1988–1999): Season 11, Episode 10 - It Lives by Night - full transcript

{\a1\pos(12,460)}THEME SONG: In the not too
distant future, somewhere

{\a1\pos(96,460)}in time and space, Mike
Nelson and his robot pals

{\a1\pos(54,432)}are caught in a nasty place.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}They try to survive
the wrath of Pearl,

{\a1\pos(138,460)}just an evil gal who
wants to rule the world.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}From her castle below, she
sets her sights above just

{\a1\pos(54,460)}to torture all the captives
on the Satellite of Love.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}Get me down!

{\a1\pos(54,432)}I'll send him cheesy movies.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}The worst I can find.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}La la la.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}He'll have to sit and watch them
all, and I'll monitor his mind.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}La la la.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}Now keep in mind
Mike can't control

{\a1\pos(33,432)}where the movies begin or end.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}La la la.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}He'll try to keep his
sanity with the help

{\a1\pos(117,432)}of his robot friends.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}Robot roll call.
Cambot.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}You're on.
Gypsy.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}Oh my stars.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}Tom Servo.
Check me out.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Crow!

{\a1\pos(201,432)}I'm different!

{\a1\pos(12,460)}If you're wondering how he eats
and breathes, and other science

{\a1\pos(117,460)}facts, just repeat to
yourself, "It's just a show.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}I should really just relax for
Mystery Science Theater 3000."

{\a1\pos(33,460)}I should really just relax for
Mystery Science Theater 3000."

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Hey, folks.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}Painting day up here on
the Satellite of Love.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}Time to spruce up the
galley, the companion ways.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-And the can.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-And the can, too, yes.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}I thought I'd, uh--

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-The can really needs it, man.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}Let me tell you.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Wow.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}OK, I thought I'd try a little
experiment based on the theory

{\a1\pos(96,460)}that the color of
the room can affect

{\a1\pos(180,460)}the mood of said
room's occupants.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}For instance, this
color of green

{\a1\pos(12,460)}is used in prisons, because it's
said to calm the inmates down.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}How does this make
you guys feel?

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-Well, I feel calm, placid.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}Sort of a Jimmy
Carter-like serenity.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-I find I have the inexplicable
desire to date Lisa Stansfield.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-That figures.
How about this?

{\a1\pos(33,460)}This orange is bright, cheery,
said to increase appetite.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Huh.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}This may sound odd,
but I feel bitter

{\a1\pos(12,432)}and ignored, you callous snobs.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-It increases my desire
to date Lisa Stansfield,

{\a1\pos(96,460)}but in particular,
I want to take

{\a1\pos(12,432)}her to see competitive curling.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-I don't know why I even bother.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}But let's try one more.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}How about this one?

{\a1\pos(180,96)}This is a morose
blackish crimson,

{\a1\pos(96,68)}the color of dry blood.

{\a1\pos(96,96)}The exact color of
the last room in Poe's

{\a1\pos(96,68)}Masque of the Red Death.

{\a1\pos(12,96)}One look at it is said to
drive its occupants mad.

{\a1\pos(12,96)}Mad, I tell you, mad! [laughing]
How does it make you feel, hm?

{\a1\pos(306,460)}-Hm.
-Hm?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-I'm sticking with
the Stansfield bit.

{\a1\pos(117,96)}-Yeah, I think it'd be
perfect for the can.

{\a1\pos(96,96)}-No, in there, I'm going
to use this eggshell color.

{\a1\pos(306,460)}-Oh!
Help!

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-Ah!

{\a1\pos(96,432)}Oh, it's horrible.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}Get it away, Mike.
-Good.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}That'll keep them
out of my biffy.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}We'll be right back.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-Oh, horrible!
-Devils!

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-And how does this
color make you feel, hm?

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-Hm.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-It makes me want
to invest everything

{\a1\pos(96,460)}I have in steam powered
weaving machines.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Me too.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}Man, that's eerie how
colors can influence you.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}Wow.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Oh, uh, Pearl's pestering us.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}Yes?

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Bloodless Bob to Monkey One.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}Bloodless Bob to Monkey One.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}The lemmings are in position.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}Drop your pay lode.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Oh, hello, Mike.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}I'm going to start today's
experiment with a little poll.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}How do you feel about
tactical misdirections?

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Oh, where'd her hand go?

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-Uh, tactical mis-- uh, hm.

{\a1\pos(36,460)}Well, I guess, you know, if
it's done for the right reasons,

{\a1\pos(138,460)}I can certainly see
using tactical--

{\a1\pos(264,460)}[engine]
-Hey!

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Whoa!

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-Hey, you used
tactical misdirection

{\a1\pos(54,460)}so we wouldn't notice you're
secretly spraying poison on us!

{\a1\pos(285,460)}-Boy.
-Yeah!

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-I don't know what
you're implying, Nelson,

{\a1\pos(180,460)}but I don't like
where it's headed.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-What I'm implying is that
you spray poison on us-- hey!

{\a1\pos(96,432)}You did it again!

{\a1\pos(180,432)}Admit it!

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-I have a statement.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Ahem.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}In response to various
reports to the contrary,

{\a1\pos(180,460)}at no time did I
or my associates,

{\a1\pos(12,460)}me personally, or myself, spray
any kind of contaminants, nerve

{\a1\pos(138,460)}function inhibitors,
or thin bouillons

{\a1\pos(117,460)}on the inhabitants of
the Satellite of Love.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-OK, Monkey One, this
is Bloodless Bob.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}Hit them hard with
everything you've got!

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Oh, hey.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}So I did.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}But what you have
to understand is

{\a1\pos(12,432)}things were different back then.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}Once you frame it in the proper
context, I think you'll--

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-That was 30 seconds ago.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Yeah, and now I've got
several more sets of arms!

{\a1\pos(96,460)}I don't even know
which ones are mine!

{\a1\pos(12,432)}Well, they're all mine, I guess.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-And hey, take a
look at these hands!

{\a1\pos(96,460)}Might as well call
me Bob Huge Hands.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-And I've got a Servo
growing out of my back.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}Now I'll have to
sleep on my stomach.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Hey!

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-Now you did it again!

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Boy.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Fine, fine.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}I'll drop a load of
very expensive, highly

{\a1\pos(96,432)}experimental antidotes.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}But you owe me, Nelson.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}I'm also sending you
a really stupid bat

{\a1\pos(180,460)}movie called "It
Lives By Night."

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Monkey One, give the
babies their bottle.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Over.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}[engine]

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Well, I should dry up and
fall right off you, Mike.

{\a1\pos(222,460)}-Yeah, sure.
No problem.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Hey, put her there, pal.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Yeah.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-[laughing]

{\a1\pos(222,432)}[movie sign]

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-Confound that Pearl.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Hello?

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Well, someone three houses down
runs a vacuum cleaner at night.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Wow, we're going
to need spotters

{\a1\pos(33,432)}in order to watch this movie.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-The left eye of Laura Mars.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-[laughing]

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Stellaluna.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-I hate these new
aluminum bats, by the way.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Let me go!

{\a1\pos(285,460)}-Help!

{\a1\pos(180,432)}This guy's nuts!

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-God, what are we seeing?

{\a1\pos(306,432)}Ugh.

{\a1\pos(222,460)}-That's it.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}Let's go, pal.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-A human!

{\a1\pos(96,460)}He'll entangle my
feet with his hair!

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Ick, there are sheets involved.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-[groaning]

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-I hate it when you get
bats in your pajamas.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Yeah.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Oh, Vikings, why?
-Alanis Morissette.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}No wonder he's
having a nightmare.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Johnny.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Honey, you've got
to cut your toenails.

{\a1\pos(264,460)}-Johnny.
-You can go home now.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-You're yelling in
your sleep again.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}The same dream?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Yeah, only Raymond Burr
was in it this time.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Try to go back to sleep.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-I'll change the bedding.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Now I'm dreaming of credits!

{\a1\pos(180,432)}[music playing]

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-It's Julee Cruise in concert.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Boy, Batman has really
let his place go.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Well, it shouldn't
drink so much coffee.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Now the credits are
gently hang gliding away.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-It lives by night.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}It pulls a long shift
down at the Ford plant.

{\a1\pos(54,68)}-In fact, the Lou Shaw film.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}-Stewart enjoys living on the
north side of many large trees.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Now, your car is on fire.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}I told you we shouldn't
do kebabs on the manifold.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Music for the heavily sedated.

{\a1\pos(96,96)}-Well now Bonnie's
not fooling anyone.

{\a1\pos(96,68)}It's Bonnie Van Lesbian.

{\a1\pos(54,96)}-When picking up hitchhikers
goes horribly wrong.

{\a1\pos(138,96)}-Oh, I wish this car
had an eject button.

{\a1\pos(96,68)}-An early David Berley.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-I've got a job delivering
spooky folk singers.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Stop it.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-(SINGING) Well, I'll be damned.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}Here comes your ghost again.

{\a1\pos(96,96)}-Someday I'll tell
you why I'm so smug.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-(SINGING) Take me
out to the ball game.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-I'm just gonna drive
it off a cliff, honey.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-A guy named Associate Producer
was the Dante Cuccinello?

{\a1\pos(285,460)}-Mike.
-What?

{\a1\pos(264,96)}He was--
-Stop it.

{\a1\pos(180,96)}-A woman and her
guitar were found dead

{\a1\pos(96,96)}in a shallow grave
in the desert today.

{\a1\pos(12,68)}-Vacation in the Forbidden Zone.

{\a1\pos(264,96)}-Johnny?

{\a1\pos(201,432)}Look at this.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-It's a free range orange.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-What have you got?

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-I don't know.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-Oh, it's the
onion of knowledge.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-It's cactus [inaudible].

{\a1\pos(306,460)}-Oh.
Huh.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Mary Tyler Less.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Man, she's got a lot
of fingers, hasn't she?

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-What is it?

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-Don't you hear that?

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-What?

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-I think I heard U2.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Johnny?

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Shh, shh.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Duh?

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Well, what is it?

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Duh.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-I don't know.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}I hear something, but I--

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-I'm too dumb to interpret it.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-That's strange.
-Johnny.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Darn, lost my crutches.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Come on, bring your thinness.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Come with me.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}We'll surprise him.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Mutual of Omaha's Mild Kingdom.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-It's horrible.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Couldn't even do one pushup.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Johnny, come on.
Let's get out of here.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Don't you dare eat
my potato salad.

{\a1\pos(264,460)}-Johnny?
Johnny?

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-I'm sorry, Cath.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}I keep forgetting they
turn everybody else off.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-They turn me on.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-God, it's ugly.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-I'll get rid of it.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}We can get going.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-I'll get it!

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Johnny, can't we skip
the caves for today

{\a1\pos(33,432)}and go right on to the slopes?

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-I'd kind of like to make
the last tour if we can.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-But I've got a lot
of not eating to do.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Is it so important?

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-Well, of course not.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}It's just my work.
-[sarcastic mumbling]

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-That's what the weekend's
all about, remember?

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-I remember something else.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}This weekend is also supposed
to be an overdue honeymoon.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-We were supposed to
do the humpty hump.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-You're right.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}I can do it later.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-No, I want to do it now!

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Oh, Johnny, you're right.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Sex is silly.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Your work is important.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}We'll catch the last tour.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-You sure?
-Yes.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Absolutely?

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-I'll hit the snooze button
on my biological clock.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Whee, we're going caving!

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Hey, honey, there's the
millennial death cult.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Spelunking away to the
music of Herbie Mann.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Oh, I hope there's
a buffet in the cave.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-While we're in the cave,
please stay together.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}No straggling.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}No wandering off.
-No fun.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}-Remember, there are hundreds
of unexplored passageways

{\a1\pos(222,432)}in the cave.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-This cave is popular
for those avoiding sex.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}-Water drips from the ceiling
for a long period of time.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}With each drop of
water that falls,

{\a1\pos(33,432)}a litte tiny bit of mineral--

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Please don't succumb to
the urge to eat each other.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}[tour guide talking]

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Oh, this is the best
not sex we've ever had.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}[tour guide talking]

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-So a scientist
gets his information

{\a1\pos(138,460)}from a minimum wage
Park Service guide.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Oh, wow.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-This is really boring.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-You OK?

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Fine.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Second stair landing, wife OK.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Hey.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-Hey, see how they're going
up those stairs around there?

{\a1\pos(264,460)}Come on.
-Huh?

{\a1\pos(306,432)}Why?

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Nobody can see us.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-We're too thin.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Doing what?

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Something down here
makes me feel primitive.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Is it my raw manhood, honey?

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-You haven't got the nerve.
-Try me.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-As an entree or side dish.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-You're on, lady.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Teeheehee.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-[fake manly laughing] Oh, oof!

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Teeheehee.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-[scream]

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Hey, guys, eventual food!

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Cathy!

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Cathy!

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Cathy!

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-I'm losing the mood!

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Johnny, please, hurry!

{\a1\pos(264,460)}-Cathy!
-[whine]

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Are you all right?

{\a1\pos(99,460)}-Yes.
They're crawling all over me.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-At least something is.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-They're mites, honey.

{\a1\pos(222,460)}Keep still.
-Oh!

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-They're mites?

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-How do we get out of here?

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-I don't know.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-Maybe by not being idiots.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Finally, an excuse
to drink my urine.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-The best thing
we can do is wait.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Yeah, taking action is
for effective people.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Sooner or later, they'll
figure we're missing.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Grub grub grub grub grub.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Johnny, Johnny, please,
let's get out of here.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Cathy, Cathy.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Let's try that.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-No.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}Best thing we can
do is stay put.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Trying to save
yourself is undignified.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-I'm sorry.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Listen, our honeymoon was
getting a little dull anyway.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-Yeah, a little soft.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}I mean flaccid.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}Sorry, I mean dull.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-What is it?

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-I heard a woman say what is it?

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-Same thing I heard before.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-[monkey noises]

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-The bats.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}I couldn't hear.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-I don't hear anything.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Quiet.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}One of them is getting closer.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}-Hey, get out of our bedroom!
-Oh god!

{\a1\pos(33,460)}-He has his own pulley system!
Duck!

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Get me out!

{\a1\pos(222,432)}Get me out!

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-I can detach myself.
I'm not stuck.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}Everybody calm down.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Hey, kick me off your
little blanket, huh?

{\a1\pos(306,432)}Huh?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}I'll kick the guano out
of you, you son of a--

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Are you hurt?

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-Just get away
from me, you wife.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-It's nothing.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-He sucker punched
me, that's all.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Are you sure?

{\a1\pos(33,432)}Are you sure you're all right?

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Listen.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Hey!

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Oh god, no!

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-She ramps right
up to ordeal mode.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-Oh!

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Is anybody down there?

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Hey!

{\a1\pos(180,432)}Hey, down here!

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Help us, please!

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Down here!

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Are you all right?

{\a1\pos(204,460)}-Yes!
-We'll just go on, then!

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Relax!

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-OK, line up, you maggots!

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-Cathy, don't do that!

{\a1\pos(285,460)}-Why?
-Never mind.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}It doesn't matter.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Tell me?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-No, the bat and I were
lovers in another life.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}That-- that's fine.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-You wanted to
examine it for rabies.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}Oh, I'm sorry.
Oh.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Don't worry about it.
-Stupid.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}Why did I kick it away?
-Yep.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}We could have had some
good stew, you know.

{\a1\pos(285,460)}-Yuck.
-[laughing] it.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}Tastes just like
white meat of tuna.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}That's what they tell me.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-You're disgusting.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-Have you ever thought about
what we look like to a bat?

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-I don't care about bats.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}I care about you.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-I care about me too.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-And I care about you, and bats.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-And maggots.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}And rats, too.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}Rats are cool.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Oh, great wife.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Look at that.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}Isn't that beautiful?

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Bread and butter.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Yes.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}Oh, what a run
that's going to be.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}Magnificent.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-That's what the ADR lady says.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-I'm so glad.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}I'm really happy.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-Oh, too much vapor action.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-You'll get the money!

{\a1\pos(180,432)}Let me go!

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-God, I hate festival seating.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Jogging.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}The horrible truth.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Try running forward
instead of in place.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-The roads [inaudible] in hell.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-You're thrusting
your hair at me again!

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-I suppose Mary Slaney
will blame a bat this time.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Right.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Be right there!

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-She's in my six.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}I can't see her.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-[screaming]

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-You kiss like my aunt Rita!
-[screaming]

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Oh, come on!

{\a1\pos(12,432)}It doesn't hurt that long!

{\a1\pos(54,460)}I have a naturally occurring
analgesic in my teeth.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Johnny, please!

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-We took a vote.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}We're pushing you out, Johnny.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Are you all right?

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-We're very concerned.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-What's wrong?

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-Isn't everybody here a bat?

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-I don't know.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}You-- you were acting so funny.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}Kind of crazy.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Honey, what are
you talking about?

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Well, you flapped your arms and
formed your tongue into a tube.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-I thought I was
a bat once, too.

{\a1\pos(264,460)}-Honey.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Are you sure you're all right?

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-I'm fine.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-You know, they save
money by hooking

{\a1\pos(12,432)}the gondola to the power lines.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}-While we're up here, we might
as well confound the Germans

{\a1\pos(12,432)}by triggering our timing bombs.

{\a1\pos(285,460)}-Woo!

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-That was an awesome
two foot run.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-[laughing]

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-What was that?

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Are you ready for this?

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Let's go!

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Geronimo!

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Russell Means!

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Hey, do Agony of Defeat again.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-[humming]

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-It's the Like Father,
Like Son suite.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Suzie Chapstick and her
husband Ron Chapstick.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-[humming]

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Hey, they flocked
all the trees.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-I have a brioche in my hat.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-[laughing] Eat my dust, honey.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-[humming]

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Look, honey, I'm doing daffies.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-I'm thirsty.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}Let's tap those.
-Yeah.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-The brakes aren't working!

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Hey, this is an
expensive camera.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}Hey, hey!
-Yahoo!

{\a1\pos(96,460)}--[laughing] My femur's
sticking out of my ski pants!

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-The precise moment they
realized their marriage

{\a1\pos(180,432)}was over.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Hey, where'd my chair go?

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-You're really brave.
Oh, God.

{\a1\pos(222,460)}-Shrinkage.
-Wow.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}Imagine having fun together.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Brace yourself.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}We're next.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Oh, no.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}I'm barely thawed
out from the slopes.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Oh, Professor Firefly.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-$23 a day.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}It's almost worth it.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-You ready for a drink?
-Oh, am I.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Here's a glass of snow.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Well, bats to you.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-I love you.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-To us, Johnny.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}--[gags] Bailey's
and pickle juice!

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Johnny!

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-How's our marriage going?

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Leave me alone!

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-I'm having sex.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Your hand!

{\a1\pos(117,460)}Johnny, Johnny, what's
the matter with you?

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Oh, hi.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}You've got to see a doctor.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-For what?
-Your hand.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-It's so young looking.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-It was an accident, honey.
-I don't care what it was.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}Please, come on.
Please.

{\a1\pos(246,460)}Please.
-Oh, it's not serious.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Not serious?

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Well, it's meant to be funny.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-All right.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}I'll stop at the
first aid station

{\a1\pos(54,432)}first thing in the morning.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-For now, I'll
bleed in the water.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Switzerland World Headquarters!

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Hey, he's a Love,
American Style doctor.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-That looks pretty good.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-It's not bad.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-I heal you in the
name of skiing.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-What are we going
to do about that?

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-That can wait.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-You're the doctor.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}But promise me something.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}Start treatment just as
soon as you get back, huh?

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-You mean the Pasteur treatment?

{\a1\pos(264,460)}-Mm-hm.
-Yes.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}Otherwise he could go sour.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Look, you two,
there's a minimum 30

{\a1\pos(117,432)}day incubation period.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}So there's no reason
to spoil the weekend.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Is it true that the
cure is sometimes

{\a1\pos(96,432)}worse than the disease?

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Is that a hangup I hear?

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Nothing is worse than rabies.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-Thanks a lot, doctor.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Johnny, I think--

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Cath.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}Honey, it's not that big a deal.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Would you stop with
the damn compassion?

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-I can wait until next week.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-I don't think a week
will make any difference.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}I am going skiing.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Oh, don't let anything
stop you, doctor.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}He's only a patient.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Take it easy, Cath.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-And you're being as
irresponsible as he is.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}You're working on a grant
in preventive medicine,

{\a1\pos(12,432)}and you won't take it yourself.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}You're not doctors,
you're children!

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-But Dr. Mellow Ski Bum
said it would be fine.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-You ready to go, doctor?

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-I'm ready, doctor.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}Where are we going?
-Hospital.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Bring your bitter wife.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-About five miles down
the hill, in town.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Are you happy now?

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-[humming]

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-So, you guys think that
the wife in the movie

{\a1\pos(138,460)}looks more like Mary
Tyler Moore than me,

{\a1\pos(96,460)}even though I have
the same skinny

{\a1\pos(12,460)}body, the same pointy hip
bones, and the exact same hair?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}If you ignore the
fact that it's a wig.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}Well, I'm very
insulted, and deeply,

{\a1\pos(138,460)}deeply disappointed
in both of you.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Really, Crow, you look
plenty like Mary Tyler Moore.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Yeah, more than the woman
in the movie, really.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Well, that's not what you
said before, you jellyfish.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}Now, we're going
to do this right,

{\a1\pos(12,460)}so there's no backpedaling
from you two clowns later on.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}You start the
scene, and then try

{\a1\pos(33,460)}to deny that you don't forget
that I'm not Mary Tyler Moore.

{\a1\pos(306,460)}-No.
Huh?

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Just go.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-Ted, you can't have a lava
lamp in your dressing room.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Oh, come on, Lou, it's what all
the groovy hep cats are doing.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-I said no, Ted.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Oh, come on, Lou, please.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Oh, Mr. Grant, Ted
was only trying to be--

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-You stay out of this, Crow.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Uh, come on, Lou.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}I mean, Crow agrees
with me, Lou.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Hey, it's Mary, you guys.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Mary.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}Yes, Mr. Grant.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}I--

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Shut up, Crow, or
I'll transfer you

{\a1\pos(12,432)}to Chuckles the Clown, OK, Crow?

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-All right, it's Mary,
you spiteful bastards!

{\a1\pos(54,460)}How dare you be Lou and you
be Ted and not let me be Mar?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}I can turn the world on
with my stinkin' smile!

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Ace.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Whoo, we got him.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Let's me grow, and
I should know it.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-We'll be right back, Lou.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-With each glance and every
lousy movement, I show it.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}Come on!

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-You prefer this to another
day on the slopes, do you?

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Mm-hm.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}Don't worry about it.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}It's strictly routine procedure.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Maybe.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}But you're strictly
special, and I

{\a1\pos(138,460)}don't want anything
to happen to you.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Today

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-Cath, nothing's happening.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Everything copacetic in here?

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-I'm worried.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Whoa, this one's
gonna hurt like hell.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Whoa.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}-Posed like this in Playgirl,
only without my pants.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Mrs. Beck, I can only
handle one emergency a day.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}Would you mind waiting
in the solarium?

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Go ahead, Cath.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}It'll only take a minute.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Be groovy, OK?

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-OK.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Hey, she's wearing a
Charlie Brown sweater.

{\a1\pos(264,460)}-Ready?

{\a1\pos(267,460)}-Yeah.
-Coochie-coochie-coo.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-We could also spackle your
nose holes, if you want.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Should I pick out
your belly button lint

{\a1\pos(138,432)}while I'm down here?

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-There's a heavenly
light on his groin.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Huh.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}-Yeah, dump that in the ocean.
-Numero uno.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-19 to go.
-119!

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-(SINGING) What would you
say if I sang out of tune?

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Can you hear me?

{\a1\pos(180,432)}Can you hear me?

{\a1\pos(180,460)}You're having an
allergic reaction.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}Try to breathe slowly.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-We have to mellow him out.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Sodium phenobarb.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-20 ccs of the dry look, and
get me some space food sticks.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Hurry, hurry.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-These nurses are on the
website Pink Lukewarm Nurses.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Man, I've really got
to quit killing guys.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Licorice condom?

{\a1\pos(180,460)}What the hell is
that doing in there?

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-[whistling]

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Um, this didn't happen.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-I think he's all right now.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}Prepare a room for Dr. Beck.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}He'll be staying here, nurse.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Yes, sir.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Um, do you have
any drug allergies?

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-That's a hell of a ride.
-Overreaction.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}I've never seen anything
like that before.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Just like rabies itself.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-From what I understand,
allergic reaction

{\a1\pos(12,432)}can produce identical symptoms.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-It wasn't my shot, it
was your stupid reaction.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-That's ironic, isn't it?

{\a1\pos(117,460)}The odds are probably
one in a million.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}And where does it hit?

{\a1\pos(96,432)}My research [inaudible].

{\a1\pos(180,432)}Terrific.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}--[laughs] It's like this
chick I was making it with.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-I guess the bats
are getting even.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Yeah.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-I could use a hug.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-What's your opinion about
the rest of the shots?

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-You mean, do I
think you're going

{\a1\pos(180,460)}to have another
reaction like this?

{\a1\pos(222,432)}I doubt it.

{\a1\pos(117,96)}I think that was just
the initial jolt.

{\a1\pos(117,96)}The rest of the shots
should have minimal effect.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Good.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Not as good as fondue.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Dr. Kipling?

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Rikki-tikki-tavi's
waiting for you.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Dr. Kipling?

{\a1\pos(138,460)}Dr. Kipling, um, I'm
sorry to bother you.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Can I just poke you in
the ribs a few times?

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-You promise not to
bomb me any more?

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-OK.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-You know, you were right.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-I am hot.
-I am kind of a ski bum.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Doctor, one of the nurses
told me what happened.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-You pinched her bippy.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-She shouldn't have done that.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-How serious is it?

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-You mean his
reaction to the serum?

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Yes.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-I wouldn't call
it serious at all.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-But is that it?

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Huh?

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Is it possible there may
be other side effects?

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Yes.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}There is a possibility
of side effects.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}But I wouldn't worry about it.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-But it was a violent
reaction, wasn't it?

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Yes, it was.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-The reaction pistol
whipped your husband.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Obviously, he is
allergic to the serum.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}But that's not
unusual in itself.

{\a1\pos(222,460)}The Pasteur
treatment can produce

{\a1\pos(138,460)}reactions very, very
similar to rabies.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}Like, uh, sudden shifts in mood,
manic depression, paranoia,

{\a1\pos(117,432)}inability to swallow.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-But that's what I don't
understand, doctor.

{\a1\pos(222,460)}He had those
reactions, everything

{\a1\pos(96,460)}you're describing,
before he took the serum.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Hey, that hits
my erroneous zone.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-I don't know what you mean.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-It was really strange.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}On the gondola,
and in the jacuzzi,

{\a1\pos(138,460)}he had these sudden
fits of anger.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Has he never been mellow?

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-He was without any problems
one minute, and then the next,

{\a1\pos(117,460)}he was like a madman,
completely out of control.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}And he wasn't even aware of it.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Mrs. Beck.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-You're a loser, baby.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-I want to assure
you of one thing.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}Whatever you saw in him,
believe me, it wasn't rabies.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}The incubation period
is one to five months.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Doctor, what if he
does have rabies?

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-I wouldn't worry about it.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}We got an early start
on the treatment.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Even if it's not fatal, there's
a good chance of brain damage,

{\a1\pos(222,432)}isn't there?

{\a1\pos(33,460)}-This is all about me shaving
my mustache, isn't it?

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Come on, let's go.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-You haven't commented
on my Aspeny good looks.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-All right, hold him.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}--[miming punching noises]
Get him, get him!

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-[screaming]

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Please, we can't all
eat the same mosquito!

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-[screaming]

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-[miming machine gun]

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-[screaming]

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-I tell you, I
don't know anything!

{\a1\pos(222,460)}-[screaming]

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Please, just hide me
from Ozzy Osbourne!

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-Mm.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}This is really good, ma'am.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}Excellent blood.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Mm, mm, B negative.
Yum.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}Thank you very much.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Slightly redolent of cilantro.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}[eating noises]

{\a1\pos(222,460)}-Fenugreek?
Mm.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-It'd be a better movie if
he'd gotten bit by a cow.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-His hands are small, I know.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}But they are his.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}They are not our own, you know?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-He's turning into
a damned werewolf.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Vile.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Chin buffed and waxed.

{\a1\pos(306,460)}Why?
Why?

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-He's becoming honey baked.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}Mm.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}[eating noises]

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-That's Eubie Blake's hand.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Where's the nurse?

{\a1\pos(117,432)}I'm dilated to eight!

{\a1\pos(285,460)}-Darn.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}Left my hand in the Fry Daddy.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-Oh!

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Hey, honey, come look at this.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}Is this weird?

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Ow, my studded contacts!

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-Ow.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}Listen, "The Planet of
the Apes" apes are coming.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-Listen, you hypochondriac,
I know what you did.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-[humming]

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-What is that?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-What do you mean, Nurse
Soon To Be Killed By A Bat?

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-What do you want?

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-[humming]

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Good morning, darling.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-My damn finger came off again.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-How did you ever get that off?

{\a1\pos(117,460)}It took two strong men
and a boy to get it on.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Cathy, I want you to
find the psychiatrist.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Why?

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-I'm mistaking you for a hat.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-For once in your life,
just do what the hell I ask.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}Can't you see I'm in trouble?

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-But the doctor says
you're doing fine.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Find somebody, Cathy!
Now!

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Maybe he got bit by a jerk bat.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Yeah.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Just as soon as
I get you settled.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Sometimes you make me so thin.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-What are you talking about?

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-In the motel.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-They won't let me leave, Cathy.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Didn't you talk to the doctor?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}He says you don't
have to say here.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}I've already signed you out.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-But I like it here.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}I love the pudding.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-I think I should stay
close to the hospital.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}For a while, anyway.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-But there's no reason!

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-I want to.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}Isn't that reason enough?

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Back in the days when
you could check yourself

{\a1\pos(96,460)}in and out of the
hospital willy nilly.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-OK.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-So I'm lifted and
separated for no reason.

{\a1\pos(306,460)}-OK.
-No.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-I need $7.00 for the copay.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-It's not OK.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-You're just a bad wife.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-I'm coming home with you.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-You don't have to.
-I've remarried.

{\a1\pos(285,460)}-Here.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}Have a mosquito on me.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Yes I do.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Did she marry Kevin McDonald?

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Why don't you go on ahead
and find us [inaudible]?

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-OK.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}You do feel well enough?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-My weak chin will
get us through this.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-Get the psychiatrist.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Now, into the closet with you.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}There you go.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-I thought I bought a half slip.

{\a1\pos(222,460)}-It's fine.
How much is that?

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-$20.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Well, throw in a
bag of bat chow.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Thank you.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}Give [inaudible], please.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Now I steal some Leggs.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Oh, nice panties.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}What-- hey!

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Uh, sir, this is a
non-convulsing zone.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}I'm going to have to ask
you to take that elsewhere.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-I'm Sheriff Character Actor.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-You all right, doctor?

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-I am now.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}Mmm.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Sergeant Ward,
Sheriff's Department.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-I'm not a bat!

{\a1\pos(180,432)}I mean, uh, hi.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-How are you feeling, Dr. Beck?

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-I'm fine.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}How did you know my name?

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-I've been following you, Doc.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}Just missed you at the hospital.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}You sure you're all right now?

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-Look, Sergeant, I'm taking
a series of preventive shots.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}I don't need to stay
at the hospital,

{\a1\pos(54,460)}and you are not a doctor, so
just what can I do for you?

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Take it easy, doc.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}All I want to do
is talk a little.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-Chew some gum at you.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Now, if I had a pretty
young wife like yours,

{\a1\pos(96,460)}and I brought something
home like this,

{\a1\pos(96,460)}there's no telling
what she might think,

{\a1\pos(117,432)}you know what I mean?

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-[laughing]

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Sorry, I'm being
weird again, huh?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-You, uh, got something
sheer for my deputy?

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-You got a beating area, ma'am?

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Is this your hand?

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-[hiss]

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Well, when I guess you
get around to it, Sergeant,

{\a1\pos(33,432)}you'll know where to find me.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-In the dweeb
department at Sears.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Oh, Doc.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-I'm having a lingerie party.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-What I wanted to
mention is I'm checking

{\a1\pos(180,460)}out the accident
at the hospital.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}Last night?

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-I don't know.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}I can--

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Well, you see,
your room's pretty

{\a1\pos(54,432)}close to where it happened.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}Thought you might
have heard something,

{\a1\pos(117,432)}you know what I mean?

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Not a thing.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}I was asleep.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Yeah, figures, what with
all you've been through.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}The reason I ask you is I
found this near the body.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-A signed confession from you.

{\a1\pos(222,460)}-It's yours.
-Yes, let's see.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}Bat W. Batman.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}Yes, it's mine.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-I don't understand
how it got there.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Yeah, that's what I
keep wondering, too.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}Same way I keep wondering how it
got off, you know what I mean?

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-I don't know.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Try it.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-OK.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}Let me turn into a
murdering bat first.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Real puzzler, ain't it?

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-Later, over a
romantic dinner, they

{\a1\pos(12,432)}discuss the details of the case.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Yes, tonight, we're
having lightly dilled

{\a1\pos(96,460)}field mouse and a
mosquito demi-glace.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Oh, honey, yes, yes, oh!

{\a1\pos(138,432)}Oh, wait, that's me.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-Mm, worry, mm, fret.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Ew, a human lady.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}Her skin is hairless, and
she really has small ears.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-It's the Bats Motel.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Fret, stew, worry.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-I'm just going to fly once
around the parking lot.

{\a1\pos(285,460)}-Augh!

{\a1\pos(180,432)}What the--

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-It's just a mannequin.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Pose at me in your
IZOD shirt, will you?

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Go tell Charlie
McCarthy I want my money.

{\a1\pos(264,460)}-There.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}Now I'll fit in.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Hey, there's a crazed
sweaty guy wearing pajamas

{\a1\pos(138,432)}and-- oh, oh, wait.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}He's got a blazer on.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}It's all right.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-A mannequin was brutally
beaten and murdered last night.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-"Married With Children" blaring
out of each and every trailer.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-I'll cry Tabasco tears for you.

{\a1\pos(222,460)}-Do the bat!

{\a1\pos(138,460)}Oh, man, yeah, suck
your blood, do the bat.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}Batty batty batty, batty batty
batty, knock down groovy bat.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}Oh yeah.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}Wanna suck your
coocoo vein, baby.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Yeah.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Now I know why they
call it scatting.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Yeah, you oughta.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-[screaming]

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Hosanna superstar,
hosanna superstar.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-Actual trailer trash.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}All right.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-Well, she got
away from the bat,

{\a1\pos(12,460)}but ironically, a tornado
tore through her trailer park

{\a1\pos(201,432)}moments later.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-[screaming]

{\a1\pos(36,460)}-Hey, hey, hey.
You got a mosquito on your neck.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}I just want to grab it.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-[screaming]

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-[screaming]

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-My turtleneck doesn't
match our sheets!

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-It's all right, it's all
right, it was just a nightmare.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}You're all right.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}You're all right, darling.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}You're all right.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}It was only a bad dream.
-I'm sorry, honey.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}We've got to wash
the sheets again.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Just remember, the first
30 years are the hardest.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-It's like the others.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}Just a dream.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}That's all.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}A dream.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Big boys don't cry.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}Big boys don't cry.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}-I can't take any more of her
shrieking her empathy at me!

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Attention, bed wetters.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}Get up and go now.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-I'm not as popular as
Enis, and that troubles me.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}--[snoring] Squeak
squeak squeak squeak.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}[snore] Squeak
squeak squeak squeak.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}[knocking]
-Sheriff.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}I'm lonely.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Who is it?

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Sergeant Ward.
-I'm not sleepy.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}Can I have a glass of water?

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-MacLeod.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-What do you want, Sergeant?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-I'd like to talk
to your husband.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Um, he's really kind
of a bat right now.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Oh, I have breasts,
I'm so great.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}That's what you're
saying, isn't it?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Can it wait until
morning, sergeant?

{\a1\pos(201,432)}It's 3:00 AM.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Uh, no.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Get back to bed, Cathy.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Sorry, Johnny.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}I told the sheriff he
could sleep with us.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-I'll handle this.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Hey, you got a good
rack there, too, fella.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-[humming]

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Oh, Mike!

{\a1\pos(12,432)}Oh my god, what happened, Mike?

{\a1\pos(36,460)}Mike!
Servo, get the rabies kit, stat.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-I'm on it!

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Hang on, buddy!

{\a1\pos(264,432)}Hang on!

{\a1\pos(222,460)}-Rabies kit!
-Great.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}Let's get to work.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}We haven't a moment to lose.

{\a1\pos(306,460)}-OK.
Don't worry, buddy.

{\a1\pos(57,460)}-There you go.
-Everything's going to be fine.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-There you go.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-This might hurt a little there.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-OK, there you go.
Good.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-OK, another one, there.
-There you go.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-Another one.
Another one.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-There's another.
And one more.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-There you go.
Good.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-OK.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-[groaning] Hey, guys.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Hey.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Oh, man, I don't
know what happened.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}I guess I fell asleep
eating my pastry.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}Huh.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}Well, now, I'm-- I'm sure I
wouldn't have a bunch of giant

{\a1\pos(96,460)}hypodermic needles
sticking out of my stomach

{\a1\pos(201,460)}unless it was
absolutely necessary.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Well, Mike, you
led us to believe

{\a1\pos(12,460)}you were rabid and seconds from
becoming a horrible man bat.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-Oh, uh, you know, I'm not.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Well, we know that.
-So, so what?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}Are you saying we can't
finish your series

{\a1\pos(201,460)}of painful but
necessary injections

{\a1\pos(96,460)}because you fell asleep
eating a cream puff?

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Yeah, thanks, Mike.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}So-- so we're just supposed to
live with no sense of closure

{\a1\pos(180,460)}just because you
don't have rabies?

{\a1\pos(201,460)}Great, great.
Thanks.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-You guys, look.
I'm sorry.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}You're right.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}I, I, uh-- I really was
selfish to not have rabies.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}I'll tell you what.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}Go ahead and finish the
series of painful injections.

{\a1\pos(264,460)}-Really?
-Thanks, Mike.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}But really, it is
the least you can do.

{\a1\pos(78,460)}-Woohoo!
Hey, 37 more injections to go.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}Let's rock.

{\a1\pos(222,460)}-[groaning]
-What?

{\a1\pos(285,460)}What?
-Just kidding.

{\a1\pos(222,460)}[movie sign]
-We've got movie sign.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}Let's go.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}SERVO: Ah, they're going
to reject that one.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-All right, sergeant.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}What's so important in
the middle of the night?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Kind of an inconvenient
hour, I guess,

{\a1\pos(54,460)}but there's been one of two
things that have been bothering

{\a1\pos(117,460)}me, and I thought I'd
better talk to you.

{\a1\pos(222,460)}-About what?
-Murder.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-[gasp]

{\a1\pos(264,460)}-Murder?
-Yes.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}I want to murder you.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-This little girl had her throat
ripped out a couple hours ago.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Hey, admit it, it
was Richard Jewell.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-What's that have to do with me?

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Well, nothing, doc.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}I'm just talking
to a lot of folks.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}Been in all night, have you?

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Yes, of course.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}My wife will verify that.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-She don't have to do that, doc.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}You're not on the stand,
you know what I mean?

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-You haven't told me
what you wanted, sir.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-He's got a Mia Farrow haircut.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Oh yeah.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}Well, you ever seen this before?

{\a1\pos(117,460)}The girl ripped it off
whoever attacked her.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-It was his prized used Kleenex.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Are you implying that's mine?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-I guess if you've
seen one bandage,

{\a1\pos(12,432)}you've seen them all, right doc?

{\a1\pos(285,460)}Night.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Yeah, well, I've got a
lot more people to wake

{\a1\pos(12,432)}up who I once saw with bandages.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-I ought to be able to
have a reaction to that.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}I'm an actor.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}Ah, it's not worth it.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-Is everything all right? '

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-He has achieved a state
of perfect blandness.

{\a1\pos(204,460)}-Take these.
-And jam them right up--

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-They'd knock out an elephant.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}They'll help you
with the nightmares.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-They'll make them scarier.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-I'm not sure they
were nightmares.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Between this and the
oil embargo, I just--

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Look, I'm not a psychiatrist.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}Far from it.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}But I think what happened
is pretty obvious.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}You were running
a very high fever

{\a1\pos(180,460)}and you wandered
out of your room

{\a1\pos(54,460)}and you spotted the nurse--
-You killed her.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Lying on the floor.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-You killed her.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Dead.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Because of you.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-You panicked.
-Re-killed her.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}-You rushed back to your room.
-Killed her again.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Now, you were in a
state of near coma.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}Then you distorted the
sequence of events.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}In your mind, you
killed the nurse.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Which is what you
did, so it's fine.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-All right.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-You're a doctor.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}You didn't help her.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Guilt.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-That's what you should feel.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Same reason I'm here
instead of up on the hill.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-He wants to stay
in the hospital

{\a1\pos(33,432)}until the treatments are over.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Alone.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-I'd go along with him
if I were you, Mrs. Bank.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Get a devil's haircut.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-He's had a severe trauma.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}It's pretty rough.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-What can I do to help?

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Oh, land me, I suppose.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Give him all support he needs.
No pressure.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Expect nothing from him.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-I think his mind
will ease up just as

{\a1\pos(201,460)}soon as these
treatments are over.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Morning.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}A little fruit for my fruit bat.
-For you.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Thank you, sweetie.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-You want one?

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-No, not now.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-I talked to your mother.
-You didn't.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Yeah, she said squeak.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Oh, you promised to
call her, remember?

{\a1\pos(246,460)}-Oh.
What did you tell her?

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-I told her you were fabulous.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Uh-huh.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}And she didn't insist
on talking to me?

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Oh, she did.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}But I said you were asleep.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}Said the honeymoon
was too much for you.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-So you bragged to mom about
the frequency of our sex.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}Thanks.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-Now we're going to keep on
hearing about grandchildren.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}You know that.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Well.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Well?

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-You always do that
when we talk about kids.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Charlie, what's wrong?
-I'm tired.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}I'd better get a little rest.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-I'll get the doctor.
-No, no.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}I want a little
rest, that's all.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Johnny, you--

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Just get the hell out of
here and leave me alone!

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Johnny!

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Forget it!

{\a1\pos(138,460)}I'm leaving you for
Dr. Mustache Love!

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-This isn't happening!

{\a1\pos(138,432)}This is in my mind!

{\a1\pos(180,432)}It's in my mind!

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-Oh, then you can clean that
up with your mind, young man!

{\a1\pos(117,432)}I can't believe this.

{\a1\pos(162,460)}-Wow.
I've got to get to church.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Ah, the bats are
paying the harp.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Please, no.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}I must stay.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}I need help.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-I'm Bradford Dilman!

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Wow, there's a whale
farting outside.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-Maynard Ferguson is coming.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Oh, good, he left
a trail of guano.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Johnny?

{\a1\pos(285,460)}-Weak.
-Johnny!

{\a1\pos(33,432)}Johnny, please, open the door!

{\a1\pos(138,432)}I want to help you.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-God, they were out of
toilet paper in there.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Johnny!

{\a1\pos(264,432)}Johnny?

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-I don't like it when
you take the Lands' End

{\a1\pos(96,432)}catalog in there.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-I guess he had a
garden level room, huh?

{\a1\pos(285,460)}-D'oh!

{\a1\pos(138,432)}Man, am I a doofus.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Man on the run, man on the run.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-The Fugi-bat.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Emergency and parcel pick-up.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Man, this remake of
The Road is pretty bad.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Just gotta swing by and
pick up Randolph Mantooth.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Out of the way,
and warm your hands!

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-I guess by definition
I'm in the Batmobile now.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}FEMALE SPEAKER (ON

{\a1\pos(12,460)}fleeing the scene heading
east on Nake Road.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}Suspect [inaudible].

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Suspect is 18 inches long
with huge upturned ears

{\a1\pos(138,460)}and weird, elongated
webbed arms.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Jeez, all he's missing
is the feather boa.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}FEMALE SPEAKER (ON
RADIO): Apprehend.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}Do not shoot.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}Repeat, do not shoot.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Beating to death is OK.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}FEMALE SPEAKER (ON
RADIO): Heavily drugged

{\a1\pos(96,460)}from treatments received
at the hospital.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-This is Sergeant Ward.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}Who is the patient who
stole that ambulance?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}FEMALE SPEAKER (ON
RADIO): Male Caucasian.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-What's his name?

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Mr. Male Caucasian.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}FEMALE SPEAKER (ON
RADIO): Dr. John Beck.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-And the giant Impala
groans into action.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-God, I love this job.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}Spinning donuts, wearing shades.

{\a1\pos(120,460)}-This is unit one in
pursuit of stolen ambulance,

{\a1\pos(12,432)}now headed south on 14th street.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}All units converge.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Over and phlegm.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Hunter Thompson, Texas Ranger.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-[humming]

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Stay in my mouth, drool.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}Come on.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-The town that's all outskirts.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-Bob Wetface.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-It's KFC.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}Man, imagine those poor saps
who lived before extra crispy.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Yeah.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-Must have been hell.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-When you want your ill
delivered fresh, call us.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-OK, first Little Shaky's
Pizza, and then I'll

{\a1\pos(33,432)}get the guy to intensive care.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-It's the mailbox of values!
-No.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-Save me, large nose holes!

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Kind of a minimalist ambulance.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-Fill her up.
Thank you.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-He was gonna hit him anyway!

{\a1\pos(285,460)}-Yeah!
-Squeak squeak.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Well, the skiing looks good.

{\a1\pos(180,96)}-Ah, hell, he's
heading to Mexico.

{\a1\pos(12,96)}It's illegal to prosecute
Chiroptera there.

{\a1\pos(78,96)}-You hit a bump in that
thing, 50 miles down the road,

{\a1\pos(96,68)}you're still recovering.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Oh, air conditioning
really kicked in.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-[laughing] This is rich!

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-I lost him.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}Oh, there he is.
-Ha!

{\a1\pos(96,432)}I've got to laugh.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}That is something.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Uh, you seen mother or Jugs?

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-All right, [inaudible].

{\a1\pos(222,460)}-He's got a
Pop-O-Matic on his car.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Pull over!

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Yeah, just let me
escape from you first.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-OK, I'll pull over first.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}This is what I want you to do.
-Crummy high speed chase.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}I didn't even knock
over a fruit stand.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-This is Ward.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Calling June.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-All cars converge at Mill Road.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}Stolen ambulance, westbound.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}Suspect homicidal.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-Hey, I'm heterocidal.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-(LAUGHING) This is great.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Squeak!

{\a1\pos(12,432)}Squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-With bitter irony,
he realizes he

{\a1\pos(33,432)}now has to call an ambulance.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-I really guanoed my
pants on that one.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-What a complete guanohead, man.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Now he's picked
up by the Kents.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-And then what?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-He becomes Super
African Crested Bat.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-No he doesn't, Mike.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-It's-- [humming]

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-I've gotta get my robe
back to the Ritz Carlton.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-I think he'll be
OK if he can just

{\a1\pos(201,460)}make it to the
mountains of bush.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Oh, oh, catheter's still in.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-Hm.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-So now we watch him
recede into a tiny speck.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}Thank you, movie.

{\a1\pos(306,460)}-Hm.

{\a1\pos(162,460)}Put my head in a
stanchion and milk myself?

{\a1\pos(222,432)}Oh, why not?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Of course he was
with me all night.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Every minute together
and never apart, huh?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-What's the point
of this, sergeant?

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-We had a young girl
killed the other night,

{\a1\pos(54,432)}over at King's Trailer Park.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}She died pretty much the
same way as the nurse

{\a1\pos(180,460)}the other night.
-The other other night?

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-But that was an accident.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-I don't think so
anymore, Mrs. Beck.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}You recognize this?

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-No.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}Should I?

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Found it in the trash
barrel at your motel.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-So?

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Well, the man who killed
that girl was wearing it.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-I told you, Johnny
never left my side.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-He was hooked
on, sucking blood.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Tell me this.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}When Dr. Beck ran off--

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-He didn't run off.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}He was hallucinating, and
that was from the medication.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-And so he ran off.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Do you believe this medication
could have made him violent?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Oh, Johnny's never done
a violent act in his life.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Yeah.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Yeah.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}Probably never
stole an ambulance

{\a1\pos(96,460)}and smashed it to
bits in his life,

{\a1\pos(33,432)}either, you know what I mean?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Hey, Mike, if you want

{\a1\pos(138,460)}there's a poster up
there that explains

{\a1\pos(12,432)}it pretty thor-- oh, it's gone.

{\a1\pos(264,460)}-Squeak?
Squeak?

{\a1\pos(264,460)}Squeak.

{\a1\pos(57,460)}-Leave the door closed?
What, were you born in a house?

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-This is good.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}He can fashion cow
pies into a crude suit

{\a1\pos(96,432)}and get away unnoticed.

{\a1\pos(264,460)}-Gotcha!
-Jack Albertson.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-I'm sorry, sonny.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}I thought you were
somebody else I knew.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Will this be my
Yoda-like mentor?

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Drink?

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-No, thank you.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-No wonder farmers
are struggling.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Well, I went to the Buddy
Epson hat distressing store.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-You don't look like
the kind of fellow

{\a1\pos(180,460)}who runs around
wearing only pajamas.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Sounds like the
Swedish Chef Muppet.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}-You [inaudible] or something?
-[swedish chef noises]

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Oh, you're beginning
to know the real me.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Well, no sense
putting off the loving.

{\a1\pos(99,460)}-You're one of the few
people who's fortunate enough

{\a1\pos(138,460)}to know the real me,
because I'm free, man.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}Free, free as a--

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-A guy who just messed himself.
-Shit.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-The real him is basically
a diseased liver with legs.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-You know that whiskey and
alcohol and all that stuff

{\a1\pos(201,432)}is depressing?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}Who do you suppose would
want to take this stuff

{\a1\pos(138,460)}if they didn't want
to be depressed?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-He's a naturally
occurring clown.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}-If you're so free and happy,
you don't want to be depressed.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}You want to stay free
and happy, right?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}So if I'm so free
and freaking happy,

{\a1\pos(12,460)}I would never even take a
swig from this bottle, right?

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Hey, squeak, man.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-All right.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-So-- so who's the bag
hiding the booze from?

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-OK, now open that robe.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-I don't only take swigs, man.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}I drink it from the
bottom of the bottle.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}And I get more and
more depressed.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}I get so depressed
I don't remember.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-I forgot the name
of my tapeworm.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-They get by the
other night or day.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}Or maybe a couple of
nights [inaudible].

{\a1\pos(96,460)}That's what I call
real freedom, man.

{\a1\pos(222,460)}-Oh, oh, I'm
technically dead again.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Something wrong with your leg?

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-I slipped and fell, I
think a couple nights ago.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}I don't remember.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Let me see that.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Why, there's a thorn in there.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Bingo.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}You found it.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}Let go, for Christ's sake.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-Your hand is broken.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-I tried to reach into
a Mickey's Big Mouth

{\a1\pos(180,432)}to get my tooth.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Are you a doctor?

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-It's admirable he's
drinking through the pain.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-So you're a doctor and you
dropped right on out, huh?

{\a1\pos(96,432)}I understand that.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}I sure do.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}You know too much.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}Anybody who knows too
much has got to drop out.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-You're quite a philosopher.
-That's me.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}Jack of all thoughts,
master of none.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Master of my belches, though.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-You know when you walk
along the railroad tracks,

{\a1\pos(138,460)}you-- you got a lot
of time to think.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}Just thinking, no doing.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}If there's the slightest
chance I might start doing,

{\a1\pos(180,460)}I just naturally
reach for a bottle.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Oh God, this story again.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-I can say for sure
there's only one thing

{\a1\pos(138,460)}I can do better than
anybody else in the world.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}Stink, right?

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Oh, good.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Hey, doc, have yourself a swig.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}You look awful.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Go on.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Well, I do feel
closer to you since you

{\a1\pos(54,432)}opened up about your stink.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Oh, I'd wipe that off.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-[gagging]

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Hey, you're wasting it.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}Catch that in a
bucket or something.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-I know this stuff's
bad, but not that bad.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-I'm sorry, liquor.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}He hurt your feelings.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Oh, the aftertaste
is exquisite.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}[squeaking]

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Come on, move over.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}We've got a huge cave here.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-And everyone stop
talking at once!

{\a1\pos(201,432)}Order, please!

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-Oh, that's good bat!

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-Yeah, that'll happen.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Sure.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Attention APB.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}Dr. John Beck.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}Roll all units.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}Every man.

{\a1\pos(96,96)}FEMALE SPEAKER (ON
RADIO): Yes, sir.

{\a1\pos(180,96)}Every man.
-How do I look?

{\a1\pos(285,68)}-Good.

{\a1\pos(222,68)}-I-- I need.

{\a1\pos(138,96)}-I don't give a damn
if she had quintuplets.

{\a1\pos(180,96)}Everybody.
-[inaudible].

{\a1\pos(117,432)}Where are you off to?

{\a1\pos(180,432)}What's going on?

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Careful now.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}He probably has Captain
Morgan's Spiced Blood.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Doc?

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-There's a couch cushion you
don't want to look under.

{\a1\pos(57,460)}-You know, some roommate
situations just don't work out.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}-OK, he's wearing the drunk's
clothes, which means there's

{\a1\pos(138,460)}a dead smelly naked
drunk somewhere.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-[scream]

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Welcome to Landfill
National Park.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Look, he's spying
on us, you guys.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Get away.
-We can see you.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Hey, look at the
Grinch's dog tree.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-He'll be so delighted
when he finds

{\a1\pos(12,460)}that old piece of bologna
in the coat pocket.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Spelunk.
Spelunk.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-This makes my nostrils flare.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Bats draw the curtain and
turn off all the lights.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}Man, it's that stupid
bat wannabe guy.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Oh, come on.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}You can't mean that.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Wait, what did you guys say?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}How many times my weight
in mosquitoes every day?

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Hey, I was hoping for
another cave tour scene,

{\a1\pos(180,432)}and we got one.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-The rocks over which
those people climbed

{\a1\pos(54,460)}give us an idea of just how
rough cave exploring may be.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Please be careful.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}This will be boring.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}- --just a few years ago.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}By a few years,
we mean somewhere

{\a1\pos(117,460)}in the neighborhood of
8,000 to 10,000 years.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Over here is Idiot's Crevasse.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-In the total period
that the cave has--

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Ooh, if he reports any
inaccuracies on bats,

{\a1\pos(12,432)}I'll be all over him, man.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Until thousands upon
thousands of years ago.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-And remember that if
you are bit by a bat,

{\a1\pos(96,460)}you will convulse
and turn into one.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}It is a scientific fact.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Lisa Loopner!

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Smile, cave.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Oh, yeah, that's a
great picture, lady.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Oh, come on!

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-The most virginal of
the herd is carried off.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}- --pretty good idea
how stalagmites develop.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}Water drips from the ceiling
for a long period of time.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}Each drop of water
dissolves and then

{\a1\pos(138,460)}a little tiny bit of
mineral is left behind.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Hey, she was on the first tour.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Yeah!

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-The longest cave tour ever.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}- --familiar with,
though, is that

{\a1\pos(12,432)}the little tiny bit of mineral--

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-He's got her
tucked in his coat.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-OK, I'm gonna expose
myself to a butte.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-Ah, yes, and he decides on
the aircraft carrier of cars.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}-OK, good, it has an overbuilt
engine and mushy suspension.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-Oh, for-- dude, just drive.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}Don't call attention
to yourself.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Dr. Man Bat, you're
needed in surgery.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}Dr. Man Bat.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-(SINGING) Squeak diddly
eek eek eek, squeak eek eek.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Ah, the Keith Richards
Memorial Blood Bank.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Excellent.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Not a peep out of you, door.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Where are all the
huge vats of blood?

{\a1\pos(33,460)}-Come on, where do they drain
the blood of the living?

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-Well, as long as I'm here,
I'll borrow me a pencil.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Oh, hello.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}Uh, can I help you?

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Hi, Nurse Eight Pints.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Uh, yes.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}I'm Dr. Winston.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}Can you tell me where the
anti-rabies vaccine is stored?

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Oh, in the cabinet.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Like all nurses,
I immediately obey

{\a1\pos(180,460)}anyone who even
resembles a doctor.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-You new around here, too?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Look, I'm married
and I'm a bat.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-[groaning]

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Dr. Winston?

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-A girl talked to me!

{\a1\pos(306,432)}Ew!

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Winston?

{\a1\pos(138,432)}Dr. Winston, please.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}Doctor, I'm going
to get some help.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-No!

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-No, the Jehovah's Witnesses
are coming up the walk!

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Please.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Doctor!

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Look, I know we just met,
but can I spit anticoagulant

{\a1\pos(117,460)}on your neck and suck
some blood, please?

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-Don't scream.
Understand?

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-You just have the cutest
little face, don't you?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Give me the key.
-What?

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-The refrigerator.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-But there's no serum in there.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-It's too late for that now.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-[whispering]

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Remember, I don't
want to hurt you.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}Got it?

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-[screaming]

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Mm, Tahitian Treat blood.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Oh, help me.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Open it.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Don't hurt me, please.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Open it!

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-It's got a bat proof lid.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-[screaming]

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-I'm going to go get an owl!

{\a1\pos(138,432)}He'll kick your ass!

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Oh, gotta sneeze.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Oh no.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-O negative, now in the
new wide mouth slam can.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-Ha!

{\a1\pos(12,460)}Straight into the arms of
Sheriff Menacing W. Pervert.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Please!

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Where is he?

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-He's in the pharmacy.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Keep that bra strap
visible until I get back.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Damn, I hate it
when you enter a room

{\a1\pos(54,432)}and there's no one to shoot.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Damn.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Gee, what am I going to do with
all these moths in my pocket?

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-I'm an injured mosquito.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}Buzz, buzz.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Hey, there's George Clooney.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-He killed a bag.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}The animal.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-Let's see this here.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}Winged mammal linen supply.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Shot from inside an oven.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Thanks for the
lift, invisible guy.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-Let me guess.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}They'll be thanking a window
company at the end of the film.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Well, I've got just
enough time to spend

{\a1\pos(201,460)}the weekend at
this Sedona resort.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Said you might have found him?

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-I only talk to
my tape recorder.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-My name is John Beck.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}This is my last
will and testimony.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}My final communication
with the outside world.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-I included this video of
me stealing a tape recorder.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Many will deny as possible the
phenomenon, the miracle, which

{\a1\pos(138,460)}has forever altered
my being emotionally,

{\a1\pos(117,432)}mentally, physically.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}A few, perhaps, will understand.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-Oh, and the kids are fine.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}We got a microwave
for Christmas.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}A gift to ourselves.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-I hope that you, Cathy,
will be one of them.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-I bid you ack.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-You are my one sorrow.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}The only regret
that I take with me.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-That and investing in silver.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Always remember I loved you.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}The first symptoms
of my metamorphosis

{\a1\pos(12,460)}were strange and horrible,
medically indescribable.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-(CRYING) This is so sad.

{\a1\pos(222,460)}-But now the
metamorphosis is swift,

{\a1\pos(12,432)}quite smooth, painless, natural.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}I welcome it.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}It is only then that I
am fully the other being.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Gary Gaetti.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-This self dominates
my personality.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}Human form and human emotion--

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-No.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}I won't listen.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}Don't you see?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}He's taking on the
guilt for something

{\a1\pos(54,432)}he doesn't even understand.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}How can you believe
something so irrational?

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-You heard the same thing
we heard, Mrs. Beck.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}That was a confession.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-A confession?

{\a1\pos(138,460)}From someone pumped
full of medicine?

{\a1\pos(180,460)}He doesn't know
what he's saying.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-I think it's more complex
than that, Mrs. Beck.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}How he got there, that's
out of my bailiwick.

{\a1\pos(285,460)}-What?
Bailiwick?

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-All I know is that
you're listening

{\a1\pos(12,432)}to the voice of a killer.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Geraldine's boyfriend?

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Something within my
psyche has emerged.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}Has helped me reach
a new consciousness.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}A sharp awareness
of truth, untouched

{\a1\pos(54,460)}by human greed or ambition.
-Bats are without sin.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-Free from the
negative, the hypocrite.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}Can you understand?

{\a1\pos(54,432)}I'm part of everything now.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-We didn't vote you in yet.
-I've journeyed to a belonging.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-Oh god, turn it off.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}Please, turn it off.

{\a1\pos(264,460)}-Pearl.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}Pearl, are you there?

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Well, hey, Mike.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}What can I not do
for you? [laughing]

{\a1\pos(54,432)}Hey, something's different.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-Yeah, well, I, uh, decided
to try a mustache again,

{\a1\pos(54,460)}only a slightly bushier one,
like the guy in the movie

{\a1\pos(285,432)}today.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}And, you know, I wanted
a woman's opinion.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Well, it certainly does
something for you, Mike.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}It kind of sort of gives
you kind of a Roberty

{\a1\pos(180,460)}Redfordy kind of
thing, in a way.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}It's not bad.
-You think so?

{\a1\pos(138,460)}Because, you know, I
was a little worried

{\a1\pos(117,460)}that it might look, I
don't know, a little--

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Hello, Pearl.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}Will I see you on
the slopes later?

{\a1\pos(264,432)}[growl]

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-Oh.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}Art.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}My, you're looking-- [growl]
What a hunk of burning love.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}You want to come down later
and maybe hot tub with me?

{\a1\pos(285,460)}Maybe?
Art?

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Oh, we'll see, Pearly.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}The fact is the babes are
on me so thick I gotta

{\a1\pos(96,460)}peel them off like
pants. [laughing]

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Oh, come on, Pearl.
Look at him.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}He looks ridiculous.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Excuse me, Art.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}What is that small
mustachioed idiot next to you

{\a1\pos(180,432)}croaking about?

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-OK, fine.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Fine.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}Point taken, OK?

{\a1\pos(12,432)}It's a nakedy lip from me.

{\a1\pos(306,460)}Ow.
Ow.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}-All right, honeys, get ready
to jump-- jump my bones.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Whoa!

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-Ladies, I'll be right back.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-I have to remember to
put a bat door on this.

{\a1\pos(225,460)}-Don't.
-Don't jump on the bed.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}You'll spill my nachos.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Johnny.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}Oh God.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}You did come back.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Keep your hand off
the light, Cathy.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-It's all right.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}No one can see us.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-I don't want you to see me.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-I have rat entrails on my lips.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Johnny, I love you.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Stay back!

{\a1\pos(12,432)}It's all finished, Cathy.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-What are you talking about?

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Something you could
never understand.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-The great taste of rate.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Oh, Johnny, please, let me try.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Nothing can be the same, Cathy.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}Can't you understand that?

{\a1\pos(264,432)}Nothing.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Let me help you.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Go home.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Empty the bug zapper
and bring them here.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-Alone?

{\a1\pos(201,460)}I couldn't go
without you, Johnny.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Go home, Cathy.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-But it's your home, too.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Actually, the mortgage
does have a bat clause.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-What are you saying?

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-The caves are my home.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-It's a development
called Caverbury Downs.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-He's posing for the dollar.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Who is it?

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-You haven't seen your
husband, have you?

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-No, of course not.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Well, I've seen his eye
and a little bit of flesh.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-You mind if I come in?

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Yes I do, Sergeant.
I'm in bed.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}It's very late.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-I had a report he
was seen in the area.

{\a1\pos(222,460)}-Honk-shoo.
Honk-shoo.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}Gosh, am I sleeping?f

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Good night, Mrs. Beck.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Good night.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-I'm definitely leaving and not
hanging around to eavesdrop,

{\a1\pos(306,432)}so.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Wait, I want to
buy a raffle ticket!

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-I've got to go.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-No!

{\a1\pos(180,460)}I have a zit on
the end of my nose!

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-It's all right.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}You're all right.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}You look fine, Johnny.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-I mean, you're trying
to be ugly, right?

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Stop sucking on that
rat and talk to me, huh?

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-I can't control it, Cathy.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}I do change.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-No you don't change, Johnny.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}You think there's a
change of some kind,

{\a1\pos(12,432)}but that's because of the drugs.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}It's in your mind.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}Don't you see?

{\a1\pos(117,460)}It's nothing more than
an allergic reaction.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Shellfish makes
me turn into a bat.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-I'm leaving, Cathy.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-No!

{\a1\pos(54,460)}The police may be watchin.g
-I told them they could.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-Johnny, Johnny, I love you.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-No, Cathy.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}No.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-I do, I do.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-My whipper is small and furry.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}I hope that's OK.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Which slutty little
bat gave you this?

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-And you love me too.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-I've seen you undressing
me with your sonar.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Oh, your tongue is
long and tubular.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}I love that.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Oh, squeak.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}Squeak, squeak, squeak.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}Oh, squeak.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Well, if I go into
the Krispy Kreme,

{\a1\pos(117,460)}I'll just be advancing
the stereotype.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Ah, yes, that.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Well, I taped Banachek.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}I better head home.

{\a1\pos(285,460)}-Ugh.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Well, he's been
using Rembrandt.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-[screaming]

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-I just made love
to Chris Berman!

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Alan Sues to the rescue!

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-He was just adding up his
Magic Fingers take for the day.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-You need more paper
toilet seat covers?

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Mrs. Beck?

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-This is a non-intercourse room.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Mrs. Beck!

{\a1\pos(96,432)}Are you all right?

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-She's all right except for
the fact that she married Beck.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-It's Fred Garvin,
male prostitute.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Mrs. Beck.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Mrs. Beck?

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Mrs. Beck, you must have
been having a nightmare.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-She is now.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Are you OK now?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-In a Motor Lodgey
kind of way, yeah.

{\a1\pos(285,460)}-Yes.
Of course.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}I-I'm sorry.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-Oh, a lot of rat carcasses.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Boy, it must have
really been a bad one.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-I've had better.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Well, listen, I'm heading
back to the office now.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}But if you, uh-- if you need
me, or if you have another one

{\a1\pos(12,460)}of those nightmares, you--
you just give me a yell, OK?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}And I'll be over there.
All right then.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}Don't you worry.
You take it easy.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}I-- I got no other
place to go, believe me.

{\a1\pos(264,460)}-Scram.
-Mrs. Beck.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Good night, Mrs. Beck.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Say, could you get the
light-- oh, never mind.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-You know, If I'm ever asked
do a love scene with someone

{\a1\pos(138,460)}turning into a bat,
I'll do it, but only

{\a1\pos(96,432)}if it's tastefully done.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Part of the story.

{\a1\pos(285,460)}-Yeah.
-Yeah.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-He left me guano.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Oh, there's more coming, honey.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}Watch out.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-It's so solid and well shaped.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}He's obviously very healthy.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-But it's so nitrogen
rich, he knew

{\a1\pos(138,460)}it would be perfect
for the tomatoes.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}FEMALE SPEAKER (ON RADIO):
Sergeant Ward, Headquarters.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}Do you read me?

{\a1\pos(54,432)}Sergeant Ward, headquarters.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Yeah, I read you.

{\a1\pos(285,460)}-Wow.
-Oh, man.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}Cackle.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}FEMALE SPEAKER (ON
RADIO): She kept

{\a1\pos(12,432)}babbling you killed her husband.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}She's got a ranger to
drive her to the cave.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-When?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}FEMALE SPEAKER (ON
RADIO): A few minutes ago.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-And when was that?

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-I'll take care of it.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}10-4.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Or 7-Eleven or whatever.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}I don't know.

{\a1\pos(285,460)}-Whoa.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}Nobody set the
brakes on the camera.

{\a1\pos(264,460)}-Uh-oh.
Going downhill.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}Going downhill.
-Yep.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}Yep!

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Hey, Mark Simpson
behind that wall.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-Well, sooner or later, I'll
have to do the bat-tussey,

{\a1\pos(180,432)}I suppose.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-He's checking with his
bat sources on the street.

{\a1\pos(264,460)}-Squeak?

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-[humming]

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Is he looking for shoe
prints on the ceiling?

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Man, I've gotta take more naps
if I'm going to be nocturnal.

{\a1\pos(78,460)}-Hey, there he goes!
Oh, it's just a crummy balrog.

{\a1\pos(285,460)}-Aha!

{\a1\pos(96,460)}Swoop down on him using
my perfectly human arms,

{\a1\pos(96,460)}and then bite him
with my human teeth.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-If only I had a huge ambulance.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Usually just hit
people with this thing.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}I've never used it
for light before.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Holy squeak.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-Batlike stealth will-- ow!

{\a1\pos(306,432)}Ow.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Oh no, he's got
a tennis racquet!

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-You're going to come
along with me peacefully.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-Please, I'm a
protected species.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-You know what I mean?

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Oh, right in the sonar!

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-I'm giving you your
Miranda beating.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-I had a ton of you in my
attic last summer, you bastard.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-You have the right
to remain ultrasonic.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}Anything you squeak can and
will be used against you.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Oh yeah, and he was also
bitten by an Ecuadorian

{\a1\pos(96,432)}bald faced monkey.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-So what, bats kneel on
moths and pummel their faces?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-You attracted to
the light now, huh?

{\a1\pos(54,432)}You gonna fly into my grill?

{\a1\pos(306,432)}Huh?

{\a1\pos(138,460)}You and your stupid
powdery wings!

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-I'm flying away.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}Flap flap flap flap.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-Ook ook ook.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}I mean squeak squeak squeak.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}--[panting] Man, I
gotta get in touch

{\a1\pos(54,432)}with some bat sympathizers.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-I was just pimp
slapped by a bat.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}How do I put that in a report?

{\a1\pos(33,460)}-This is worse than when I got
jumped by those field mice.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Well, I shouldn't
have laughed my way

{\a1\pos(78,460)}through small mammal
wrestling back at the Academy.

{\a1\pos(285,460)}-Hey.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}He's not wearing underwear.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-That would be cool
if I had any ammo.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-My father was a
master bat hunter.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}Guess that makes me
to Bat Masterson.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}Just enjoy that one, fellas.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Give me five good
men and a wig.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}I'll get them.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Dick Dale's lightly
noodling somewhere.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-I took a nap in
the blast furnace.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-Now, let's be honest.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}The other bats haven't really
welcomed him with open arms,

{\a1\pos(180,432)}have they?

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-What the squeak?

{\a1\pos(33,460)}-So, he's just going to-- what
the-- well, squeak him, man.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Sergeant, is my
husband all right?

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Ooh, he really
banged you up, honey.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-I don't know what he is.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-Well, what happened?

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-I don't know what happened.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-But bats weigh less than a
pound, and he beat you up?

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-All right, that's enough.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Well, there he is.
He's in the corner.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Let's go.
-No.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}Listen.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-Wait, my hearing aid's off.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-I don't hear anything.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Strange.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}I hear something,
but I don't know--

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Uh, ma'am, you need
me to ram anyone?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Give me a minute.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}I have a fear of paneling.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-What's wrong with you?
-Sorry.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}I just thought of Jack Carter.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}-I knew wouldn't understand.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Duh, what?

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-Get ready, sergeant.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Why's he got a picture of
Slash from Guns 'n' Roses?

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-So who was this
movie's target audience?

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Well, I don't know.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}A bat fetishist named Stan,
and even he missed it.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Oh, is this part of the
movie we're watching?

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-There's a bush baby
hiding in the backseat

{\a1\pos(117,432)}waiting to pound him.

{\a1\pos(306,460)}-Hm.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}Do I have time to plant
evidence somewhere?

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Haha, tell me that
one again, Jimmy!

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-I have pyarea!

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Boy, the mosh pit
is crowded tonight.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Come on, you're
pinching my wing.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-Someone threw toilet
paper into a fan.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Hey, back off.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}I saw the mosquito first.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-Guys, we're very vulnerable
packed together like this.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}One owl could take us all.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}Spread out!

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Hey, here comes
our mouse supplier.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Mice.

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Oh, are you wearing Joan too?

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-If it's comfortable with you.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}We don't have to talk.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Could I just go to the
bathroom alone for once?

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Well, gotta get to the cave.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}Company's coming.

{\a1\pos(264,460)}-Banzai!
Banzai!

{\a1\pos(201,460)}-Oops, sorry.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}Sonar's jammed.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}Somebody's operating
a TV in the area.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}It's screwing us all up.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-Oh my god.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-I'm out of wiper fluid.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}-They're attacking us!

{\a1\pos(12,432)}What the hell's wrong with you?

{\a1\pos(12,68)}Can't you see what's happening?

{\a1\pos(222,68)}-Yes, I see.

{\a1\pos(117,96)}-The bats are throwing
rotten tomatoes at them.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-These wipers are rated
for intestines and gall.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}I don't know what
the problem is.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}[brakes screeching]

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-The bats are causing me to
not know how to stop a car!

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-I'm concerned for
the hostile, creepy,

{\a1\pos(54,432)}ineffective panicky sheriff.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}I hope he's OK.

{\a1\pos(222,460)}-Emergency.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}This is Ward.
Emergency.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}Emergency.
Hey!

{\a1\pos(138,432)}What are you doing?

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Good bye, sergeant.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Hi, I need a ride.
-Yeah, yeah.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}Me too.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}Wait, wait, I've got
to get my suitcase.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Can my cousin and my mom
and my brother come too?

{\a1\pos(201,460)}How about me?
Can I come along?

{\a1\pos(12,460)}Hey, thanks a lot for the ride.
Thanks, man.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}Pile in, guys.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Get off!

{\a1\pos(264,432)}Get off!

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-Well, the realtor's showing
us a couple of caves.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}Guess I'd better get going.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-Hm.

{\a1\pos(36,460)}It's hard to fly when you've
got a Coach purse over your arm.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}[mumbles]

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-So message is, ladies, if
your husband becomes a bat,

{\a1\pos(138,460)}abandon your career
and become one, too.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Yeah, the final
part of her walking

{\a1\pos(96,460)}away was just too
graphic to show.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}[music playing]

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-(SINGING) We never
go anywhere anymore.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Sounds like Sam
Harris is singing this.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-Well, I've changed my mind.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}I'm back.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}-Yeah, by this time,

{\a1\pos(12,432)}a 22 year old trophy bat.

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Now wait a minute.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}How did she turn into a bat?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}The only contact she had
with him was in the hotel,

{\a1\pos(138,460)}and the-- oh my God.
-Ugh!

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Oh my God, I get
to shower first.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}-No, me first!

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Come on!

{\a1\pos(57,460)}-So you're a brand new
franchisee with the Buddy Ebson

{\a1\pos(180,460)}Hat Distressing
Corporation, huh?

{\a1\pos(138,432)}-Hoo, doggies, Mike.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-Stress enhanced
for bums since 1967.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}And there's enough bums is
willing to pay for what?

{\a1\pos(96,460)}-Well, you see, hats are
blocked, then folded, stepped

{\a1\pos(12,460)}on, crushed, and rolled in
dirt, all for a very low price.

{\a1\pos(96,460)}There's plenty of
bums, Mike, and they

{\a1\pos(117,460)}don't want to be seen
eating cold beans out

{\a1\pos(96,460)}of a can wearing a brand
new Dobbs New York.

{\a1\pos(264,432)}-No, no.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}Well, let's take
a look at the kit.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}Looks like you get a list
of employee greetings.

{\a1\pos(57,460)}-Oh, yes.
They're very strict about that.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Hoo doggies, of course.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}Mess of vittles.

{\a1\pos(54,432)}Wonder what granny's up to.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}-Yeah, naturally.

{\a1\pos(54,460)}-And you get a bag of dirt.
-Yep, yep.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}-Good.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}And reorder forms for
the dirt. $75 a bag.

{\a1\pos(285,460)}-Huh.
And that's it.

{\a1\pos(201,460)}And that's it.
-What?

{\a1\pos(201,432)}Wait a minute.

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Wait.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}No business plan?

{\a1\pos(12,432)}No promotional materials?

{\a1\pos(285,432)}Leads?

{\a1\pos(12,432)}I paid $20 grand for that?

{\a1\pos(180,460)}Well, of all the
stupid, dang blasted--

{\a1\pos(12,460)}-Hey, Mike, could you give me a
hand down at the loading dock?

{\a1\pos(12,460)}My franchisee kit from the
Red Skelton Technologies

{\a1\pos(12,432)}Hat Distressing Company is here.

{\a1\pos(12,460)}It looks unbelievably complete.
-Wow.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}All right.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}Let's go.

{\a1\pos(117,432)}The castle's calling.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}-Stupid Buddy Ebson cap signing.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}You stupid!

{\a1\pos(138,460)}Throw it in a pond.
You piece of--

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Oh, hi, fellas.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}Much as I'd love to emphasize
about the whole Buddy Ebson

{\a1\pos(54,460)}thing, Pearl has trapped us
here in the wake of the movie,

{\a1\pos(12,460)}and we're watching slides
of her various honeymoons.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}-So, uh, did, uh, you
ever marry that guy

{\a1\pos(180,460)}and, uh, go to a
cave on the honeymoon

{\a1\pos(96,460)}and have him turn
into a bat again?

{\a1\pos(180,460)}-No, no, nothing
like that, Bobo.

{\a1\pos(117,460)}Although here's Chuck
and me at the prairie dog

{\a1\pos(96,432)}colony in South Dakota.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}-Oh!

{\a1\pos(33,432)}-Oh, he became a prairie dog.

{\a1\pos(33,460)}But usually, when my husbands
died on the honeymoon,

{\a1\pos(138,432)}it was more mundane.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}Like Wendell here.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}Somebody shot him.

{\a1\pos(306,432)}Hm.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}Same thing with Philippe.

{\a1\pos(180,432)}And Maury.

{\a1\pos(138,460)}Somebody shoved hat
pins through his eyes

{\a1\pos(12,432)}right before the ceremony.

{\a1\pos(96,432)}We still don't know who.

{\a1\pos(201,432)}Hey, sit down.

{\a1\pos(12,432)}You want me to marry you?

{\a1\pos(180,432)}-Ooh, no.

{\a1\pos(222,432)}-And Jerome.

{\a1\pos(180,460)}You want to know
how Jerome died?

{\a1\pos(180,432)}[music playing]

{\a1\pos(285,68)}-Well?