My Dad the Rock Star (2003–2004): Season 2, Episode 5 - What's the Scoop? - full transcript
After being humiliated by Buzz one too many times, Willy comes up with the fiendish plan of hiring Scoop, the relentless paparazzi who's always spying on Rock, to rake up some dirt on his schoolhouse nemesis. /nBut the only way that Scoop agrees to go through with the plan, is if Willy hands over a very embarrassing video of Rock! Soon Willy becomes Scoop's faithful apprentice, but when Scoop makes up a false story, just to embarrass Buzz, Willy wants nothing to do with the paparazzi lifestyle.
♪ It’s so hard ♪
♪ Just to feel normal
♪ When everyone is completely
paranormal ♪
♪ And everything is totally
deranged ♪
♪ And you’re the only one who’s
sane ♪
♪ Sometimes it gets
so unbearable ♪
♪ But mostly I feel
unbelievable ♪
♪ And I’m a freak ’cause my dad
is a rock star ♪
♪ Yeah
♪ My dad is a rock star
♪ That’s it, the party’s over ♪
♪ Turn off the lights, I’m
leaving the stage ♪
♪ I just wanna get
a little more control ♪
♪ So nobody can tell me what to
do ♪
♪ Sometimes it gets
so unbearable ♪
♪ But mostly I feel
unbelievable ♪
♪ And I’m a freak, ’cause my dad
is a rock star ♪
♪ Yeah
♪ My dad is a rock star
♪ Yeah, yeah
♪
Ah-whoo!
(Yawning)
Huh?
(Chittering)
Aw, that happens to me all the
time.
Steady, little fuzzy dude.
I can see the headline now.
Rockzilla takes rodent problem
into own hands.
Front page for sure.
(Gasping)
Scoop, go bother some other
world famous rock star for a
change.
Are you kidding?
Nobody says tabloids like the
great Rockzilla.
Smile.
Why I oughta!
(Rustling)
Hah!
Hm.
(Panting)
Aw, man.
I’ve been chasing that rat all
morning.
All morning.
Dad, I’m going to get slammed
with detention if I’m late for
school.
Sorry, Willy.
Who would’ve thought the world’s
biggest amplifier would blow all
the fuses for your room.
(Awkward laughing)
Hey, I’ll wake you.
Hm, okay, Dad.
But you’ve got to promise you
won’t forget.
Won’t forget, won’t forget,
won’t forget.
I forgot to wake Willy!
MAN: Now, boys, the most
important thing you can hope for
in life is experience.
Experience is derived through
suffering.
And suffering is best derived
through dodge ball.
(Teeth chattering)
Zilla’s going to pay for being
late.
Thanks a lot, Dad.
I’ll be on lunch tray duty until
my senior prom.
Unless, I don’t get caught.
(Grunting)
(Screaming)
That’s going to lead to some
embarrassing questions.
(Laughing)
I squeezed under Malfactor’s
radar.
Now all I have to do is get by
F--
(Throat clearing)
MR. MALFACTOR: Is that so?
Mr. Malfactor?
But, how?
Perhaps, I could shed some
light on your predicament.
Buzz.
Good work, Sawchuck.
You’ve proven to be an
exceptional hall monitor.
As for you, Zilla, this stunt
will cost you, hm, 36 hours of
detention per week for the
remainder of the school year.
Sawchuck, please escort Mr.
Zilla to, hm, ah, phys ed
class.
That is all.
Hall monitor?
Aw, now I’ve seen it all.
You know, Buzz, one of these
days I’m going to get you back
big time.
(Laughing)
Oh, please.
Your weak Zilla mind is no match
for my Machiavellian intellect.
Hey guys, fresh meat!
I don’t suppose we could
discuss this like gentlemen?
(Grunting)
Yo, Willy, glad you could
make it.
ROCKZILLA: Okay, okay.
Right foot, rock and roll fist,
tongue wag.
Spit fake blood.
(Spitting)
And, uh, oh, knee slide!
Yee-haw!
(Screaming)
Rug burn!
How was that?
Huh?
No way!
That little creep.
(Screaming)
(Laughing)
And Mom wanted me to be a
chiropodist.
Nope, too good for him.
Sheesh.
There’s got to be a way to get
Buzz back.
What the?
(Laughing)
Yes!
Buzz’ll be in detention until
he’s 50.
Or until he graduates.
Whatever comes first.
Zilla, what are you doing out
of the detention--
Bear with me, Sir.
I have something shocking to
show you.
What do you think of that?
Ho, ho, very interesting.
Yo, check it out.
Free pudding.
Mr. Malfactor, what up?
Two weeks detention for
defacing school property is
what up.
Huh?
Now, I believe you were just
on your way back to detention
hall.
Yes, sir.
What was that all about?
Ah, so that’s why Buzz gave
me this free pudding.
But how did he know my greatest
weakness?
(Chewing)
That’s the last time Buzz
get’s the better of me.
Okay, starting now.
(Laughing)
We’ll see who has the last
laugh.
(Chewing)
There must be something you
can do to get back at Buzz.
Believe me, I’ve tried.
I’ll vouch for that.
Stupid pudding cups.
Ooh, I can never stay mad at
you.
It’s like Buzz has some kind
of prank radar.
How do you out weasel the
biggest weasel in school?
There’s not enough weasel in
all the weasel holes in the
world for that kind of out
weaselling.
Okay, stop saying weasel.
(Growling)
Sounds like...Mosh?
Hey, kid.
Uh, Willy, right?
Little help over here.
You’ve got a talking tree
now?
Man, rich people have
everything.
(Growling)
Well, well.
If it isn’t Scoop.
Get any good shots of my dad
plucking his nose hairs lately?
Hey, Mosh.
Dinner time.
O-o-o-okay, kid.
I’m at your mercy here.
We can make a deal, all right?
Oh sure, like I’d make a deal
with a no good sleazoid who digs
up people’s most
embarrassing secrets and--
Hm, okay.
I’ll help you but on one
condition.
You’re going to teach me
everything you know.
Well, that won’t take long.
It’s a deal.
ROCKZILLA: Where are you,
Scoop?
(Buzzing)
Huh?
(Screaming)
Yow!
(Screaming)
Oh, man.
That lousy no good shutter bug
will make this front page news.
(Grunting)
Oh, sheesh, this time for sure.
No one to take my picture?
(Shuddering)
Why do I suddenly feel so alone?
Ow!
WILLY: So, let’s get started,
shall we?
Not so fast.
I get you some juicy dirt on
this Buzz character and...
you do what for me?
I rescued you from my lizard,
remember?
Yeah, but what have you done
for me lately?
Okay, okay.
I’ve got something on my dad
that no one in the world has
ever seen.
Hello, I’m Barbara Winters.
Tonight we probe deep into the
mind of a music legend.
Rock on, Barbara.
Yes, welcome Rockzilla.
Now, tell me, Rock.
Go on, ask your most
heartless gut wrenching
questions.
I ain’t going to shed a tear.
Well, let’s start with an
easy one.
1968, City Park, there’s you,
your father, and your little
dog Bobo.
Bobo?
Oh, Barbara, how could you?
(Sobbing)
There, there, there.
Rock, it’s all right, come
along now, come along.
(Beeping)
What do you say, Scoop?
Oh, I say, gimme, gimme,
gimme.
I need that tape, kid.
You’ve got to hold up your
end of the bargain.
No problemo, the first thing
you should learn about
photojournalism.
It’s a very dignified
profession.
(Alarm Sounding)
Oh, that’s the alarm I rigged to
go off when the Mayor puts out
his trash.
Now we go rustle through it.
No thanks, I’m good.
Can we get started with Buzz
please?
Whoa there, you’ve got to
learn to fish before you can eat
tuna sandwiches, kid.
Now then, we have a date with
the Mayor’s dinner scraps!
Rock, honey, that pacing has
got to stop.
It’s making my yin want to
strangle your yang.
Well my yang has never felt
more empty.
There’s no one out there
snapping pictures of me,
Crystal.
That’s what you’ve always
wanted.
Are you nuts?
What would life be like if
strangers didn’t pay any
attention to me?
(Shuddering)
That’s a future too horrible to
contemplate.
I’m off to my revitalizing
sleep chamber, sweetie.
Try not to let this get the
better of you.
Oh, sure.
Leave me all alone in my
greatest moment of need.
Sweetie, you’re not alone.
You still have people watching
you 24/7.
Hey, you’re right.
I bet those security dudes are
just itching for some quality
entertainment.
Welcome to Zilla Security
Camera Theatre.
For tonight’s presentation we
have a timeless classic--
(Grunting)
Huh?
Hey!
Hey!
(Growling)
(Grunting)
Uh, hello, anyone there?
Anyone?
Oh, Scoop’s late.
If he bails on me I’ll--
SCOOP: Patience my young
apprentice.
(Screaming)
(Sighing)
(Screaming)
(Grunting)
Pretty cool.
Except for the part where you
nearly broke your neck.
The first lesson about being
a paparazzi is that you must
become the dirty laundry that
you seek.
Dirty laundry, got it.
Good.
Now, we must condition our
bodies to meet the tremendous
pressures of...hm, let’s say...
hiding in a garbage can.
One must utilize all manner of
entrances.
If you want to get past good
don’t let anything stand in your
way.
(Creaking)
(Crashing)
(Laughing)
Nice dismount.
The judges give it a 5.2.
Man, this paparazzi work
looks really glamorous.
Where do I sign up, dog?
(Tires Squealing)
ROCKZILLA: Woo-hoo!
That’s it, Skunk.
Hey, try to hit that mailbox.
Ooh, Skunk, over there!
Ah-whoo!
Hey, pal, shoot as much as you
want and go ahead and post it on
the internet.
Oh, now even pigeons are cooler
than I am.
(Grunting)
Crikey, mate, are you all
right?
Did anyone catch that?
Uh, sorry, governor.
Oh, well take me home then.
Or maybe the hospital.
Yeah, the hospital.
(Chewing)
SCOOP: One must master the
art of being invisible.
You’ve got to make sure no one
ever catches you tailing them.
Got it.
Hey, Scoop, I need to know.
Why are you always after my dad?
I mean, what’s so special about
Rockzilla?
SCOOP: It was my first gig, I
was a reporter for the Tumble
Rock.
My assignment?
Get an interview with
Rockzilla.
(Engine revving)
Hey, a reporter.
You must be the enemy.
Huh?
Me?
Oh, no no no, I-I-I-I--
Don’t worry, kid.
You and I are going to be best
friends.
You’ll be invited to all my
parties.
You’ll meet everyone.
SCOOP: Parties?
You’ll see everything, hear
everything, taste everything,
feel ever--
(Screaming)
Did you just eat one of my
pre-show mint yummies?
Aw, the cycle is broken.
The ritual is ruined.
(Sobbing)
I’m here for you, Rock.
I’m here for you.
(Sobbing)
Rock refused to go on and I
was barred for life from his
concerts.
After that no one would hire me.
Wow.
Only the rag I work for now,
The National Finger Pointer,
would give me a chance.
(Screaming)
I hear the salmon is good.
(Groaning)
Man, a concussion sure puts
it all into perspective.
No more wild stunts for
publicity.
(Gasping)
Stop, I’ve got some cool card
tricks.
Wait, I brought my harmonica.
Cool, this is double o
seventeen, over.
Yeah, I know.
You’ve got a license to be a
dork.
I don’t know, Willy, this feels
kind of sleazy.
Hey, all we’re doing is
uncovering secrets that Buzz
shouldn’t have in the first
place.
Here’s the plan.
No sign of Buzz, team leader,
over.
WILLY: 10-4, report only
positive ID.
Any luck on your end, Agent Q?
All clear, this covert
lemonade stand is the perfect
cover, but maybe drinking five
glasses wasn’t such a great
idea, yo.
The spies in place?
Just like you said.
One must have many eyes.
To catch one butthead.
(Laughing)
You’re learning kid.
QUINCY: Come in, Willy.
We’ve got Buzz activity, over.
10-4 he’s headed for the
park.
WILLY: There he is.
What now?
Now, we wait for the perfect
shot.
(Girl humming)
Oh, that’s got to hurt.
BUZZ: What’d you do that for?
More than you know, kid.
SCOOP: Buzz, blindsided by
pint sized Petunia.
WILLY: Come on, Scoop.
We could find something better
than this.
Willy, you couldn’t get any
better unless Buzz was wearing
the same dress as that girl.
Trust me.
But it’s not right.
What if this kind of thing has
happened to Buzz his whole life?
(Grunting)
Willy, this happens all the
time.
Why, just yesterday I made it
look like a famous rock star was
strangling a squirrel.
I won’t do it.
I wanted payback but not like
this.
The deal’s off.
(Gasping)
No way!
I got you your dirt and now you
get me my tape!
Okay, okay, Scoop.
A deal’s a deal.
Here’s your tape.
(Kissing)
I’m sorry I ever wanted to be
like you.
Tell Rockzilla he can look
forward to a life of endless
humiliation.
Humiliate my own Dad?
As if.
WOMAN: There’s a dangerous
seven foot green haired lunatic
lurking around the
neighbourhood causing a
disturbance.
And a cat up a tree on Front
street.
Cat up a tree?
Let’s roll!
(Tires squealing)
Hey!
Okay, dog, we can either
wallpaper the school with a
million photocopies or take the
personal approach and slide one
copy into every locker.
Q, I don’t think I can do
this.
I know, there must be a
thousand lockers in this school.
No, Q, I mean I can’t use the
picture to burn Buzz.
It-it’s just not right no matter
how much he deserves it.
I hear you.
(Sighing)
Yo, let me take it off your
hands.
Thanks, Quincy.
What are you going to do,
destroy it?
Something like that.
Stop the presses!
W-what presses?
I’ve always wanted to say
that.
Oh man, Buzz is going to
flatten me.
Chill, Will.
He’s going to be too busy hiding
his face to rearrange yours.
That’s true, Willy.
Even the chess club is laughing
at him.
I mean, ouch.
The chess club?
I still don’t feel right
about this.
I’ve got to square up with Buzz.
Maybe he’ll let me off the hook
with just a quick noogie.
(Laughing)
Hey, Buzz, what’s up, big guy?
(Growling)
Look, I’m sorry about the
picture, okay?
I know what really happened out
there and--
(Grunting)
Hee hee, you got me good
there, Zilla.
I didn’t know you had it in you.
What?
That’s it?
Not by a long shot.
I see now that I have been going
too easy on you and I need some
time to plan our next encounter.
Oh, by the way, you should’ve
printed a picture of me trying
to help that little girl.
That would’ve really ruined me.
Hey Dad.
(Screaming)
Oh, hey Willy.
I thought you were a prowler, or
you know anyone who might want
to hear a couple of tunes.
Sorry.
Hey, Dad, do you remember that
interview you did with Barbara
Winters?
Sure, I can’t believe they
refused to air it.
I thought it really showed my
sensitive side!
Yeah, well, I’ve got a
surprise.
Tonight, exclusive footage of
a rare Rockzilla interview.
Showing the famous legend like
you’ve never seen him before.
I hope you’ve got your
tissues ready, Rock.
(Laughing)
Our online poll is showing
that the fans are loving the
new soft side of Zilla.
What?
(Honking)
(Grunting)
Wait a sec, that kid must’ve
known this would happen!
So, the student out scooped the
master.
I’ve allowed Rock a moment of
peace.
From now on I’m sticking to that
guy like glue.
Wherever he goes I’ll be there
first.
(Tires squealing)
I couldn’t get anyone to even
look at that tape.
Willy, my boy, how’d you do it?
Easy, I let Scoop think it
was damaging to your career.
Hah, Willy, if you ever want
a job as my publicist.
Heh, no thanks, Dad.
I’m washing my hands of anything
that has to do with the press.
I don’t blame you.
Scoop brings out the worst in
all of us.
If I never see him again it’ll
be too soon.
Oh, please, please, please,
please be there.
I knew I could count on him!
(Alarm Sounding)
(Screaming)
(Barking)
(Laughing)
♪
♪ Just to feel normal
♪ When everyone is completely
paranormal ♪
♪ And everything is totally
deranged ♪
♪ And you’re the only one who’s
sane ♪
♪ Sometimes it gets
so unbearable ♪
♪ But mostly I feel
unbelievable ♪
♪ And I’m a freak ’cause my dad
is a rock star ♪
♪ Yeah
♪ My dad is a rock star
♪ That’s it, the party’s over ♪
♪ Turn off the lights, I’m
leaving the stage ♪
♪ I just wanna get
a little more control ♪
♪ So nobody can tell me what to
do ♪
♪ Sometimes it gets
so unbearable ♪
♪ But mostly I feel
unbelievable ♪
♪ And I’m a freak, ’cause my dad
is a rock star ♪
♪ Yeah
♪ My dad is a rock star
♪ Yeah, yeah
♪
Ah-whoo!
(Yawning)
Huh?
(Chittering)
Aw, that happens to me all the
time.
Steady, little fuzzy dude.
I can see the headline now.
Rockzilla takes rodent problem
into own hands.
Front page for sure.
(Gasping)
Scoop, go bother some other
world famous rock star for a
change.
Are you kidding?
Nobody says tabloids like the
great Rockzilla.
Smile.
Why I oughta!
(Rustling)
Hah!
Hm.
(Panting)
Aw, man.
I’ve been chasing that rat all
morning.
All morning.
Dad, I’m going to get slammed
with detention if I’m late for
school.
Sorry, Willy.
Who would’ve thought the world’s
biggest amplifier would blow all
the fuses for your room.
(Awkward laughing)
Hey, I’ll wake you.
Hm, okay, Dad.
But you’ve got to promise you
won’t forget.
Won’t forget, won’t forget,
won’t forget.
I forgot to wake Willy!
MAN: Now, boys, the most
important thing you can hope for
in life is experience.
Experience is derived through
suffering.
And suffering is best derived
through dodge ball.
(Teeth chattering)
Zilla’s going to pay for being
late.
Thanks a lot, Dad.
I’ll be on lunch tray duty until
my senior prom.
Unless, I don’t get caught.
(Grunting)
(Screaming)
That’s going to lead to some
embarrassing questions.
(Laughing)
I squeezed under Malfactor’s
radar.
Now all I have to do is get by
F--
(Throat clearing)
MR. MALFACTOR: Is that so?
Mr. Malfactor?
But, how?
Perhaps, I could shed some
light on your predicament.
Buzz.
Good work, Sawchuck.
You’ve proven to be an
exceptional hall monitor.
As for you, Zilla, this stunt
will cost you, hm, 36 hours of
detention per week for the
remainder of the school year.
Sawchuck, please escort Mr.
Zilla to, hm, ah, phys ed
class.
That is all.
Hall monitor?
Aw, now I’ve seen it all.
You know, Buzz, one of these
days I’m going to get you back
big time.
(Laughing)
Oh, please.
Your weak Zilla mind is no match
for my Machiavellian intellect.
Hey guys, fresh meat!
I don’t suppose we could
discuss this like gentlemen?
(Grunting)
Yo, Willy, glad you could
make it.
ROCKZILLA: Okay, okay.
Right foot, rock and roll fist,
tongue wag.
Spit fake blood.
(Spitting)
And, uh, oh, knee slide!
Yee-haw!
(Screaming)
Rug burn!
How was that?
Huh?
No way!
That little creep.
(Screaming)
(Laughing)
And Mom wanted me to be a
chiropodist.
Nope, too good for him.
Sheesh.
There’s got to be a way to get
Buzz back.
What the?
(Laughing)
Yes!
Buzz’ll be in detention until
he’s 50.
Or until he graduates.
Whatever comes first.
Zilla, what are you doing out
of the detention--
Bear with me, Sir.
I have something shocking to
show you.
What do you think of that?
Ho, ho, very interesting.
Yo, check it out.
Free pudding.
Mr. Malfactor, what up?
Two weeks detention for
defacing school property is
what up.
Huh?
Now, I believe you were just
on your way back to detention
hall.
Yes, sir.
What was that all about?
Ah, so that’s why Buzz gave
me this free pudding.
But how did he know my greatest
weakness?
(Chewing)
That’s the last time Buzz
get’s the better of me.
Okay, starting now.
(Laughing)
We’ll see who has the last
laugh.
(Chewing)
There must be something you
can do to get back at Buzz.
Believe me, I’ve tried.
I’ll vouch for that.
Stupid pudding cups.
Ooh, I can never stay mad at
you.
It’s like Buzz has some kind
of prank radar.
How do you out weasel the
biggest weasel in school?
There’s not enough weasel in
all the weasel holes in the
world for that kind of out
weaselling.
Okay, stop saying weasel.
(Growling)
Sounds like...Mosh?
Hey, kid.
Uh, Willy, right?
Little help over here.
You’ve got a talking tree
now?
Man, rich people have
everything.
(Growling)
Well, well.
If it isn’t Scoop.
Get any good shots of my dad
plucking his nose hairs lately?
Hey, Mosh.
Dinner time.
O-o-o-okay, kid.
I’m at your mercy here.
We can make a deal, all right?
Oh sure, like I’d make a deal
with a no good sleazoid who digs
up people’s most
embarrassing secrets and--
Hm, okay.
I’ll help you but on one
condition.
You’re going to teach me
everything you know.
Well, that won’t take long.
It’s a deal.
ROCKZILLA: Where are you,
Scoop?
(Buzzing)
Huh?
(Screaming)
Yow!
(Screaming)
Oh, man.
That lousy no good shutter bug
will make this front page news.
(Grunting)
Oh, sheesh, this time for sure.
No one to take my picture?
(Shuddering)
Why do I suddenly feel so alone?
Ow!
WILLY: So, let’s get started,
shall we?
Not so fast.
I get you some juicy dirt on
this Buzz character and...
you do what for me?
I rescued you from my lizard,
remember?
Yeah, but what have you done
for me lately?
Okay, okay.
I’ve got something on my dad
that no one in the world has
ever seen.
Hello, I’m Barbara Winters.
Tonight we probe deep into the
mind of a music legend.
Rock on, Barbara.
Yes, welcome Rockzilla.
Now, tell me, Rock.
Go on, ask your most
heartless gut wrenching
questions.
I ain’t going to shed a tear.
Well, let’s start with an
easy one.
1968, City Park, there’s you,
your father, and your little
dog Bobo.
Bobo?
Oh, Barbara, how could you?
(Sobbing)
There, there, there.
Rock, it’s all right, come
along now, come along.
(Beeping)
What do you say, Scoop?
Oh, I say, gimme, gimme,
gimme.
I need that tape, kid.
You’ve got to hold up your
end of the bargain.
No problemo, the first thing
you should learn about
photojournalism.
It’s a very dignified
profession.
(Alarm Sounding)
Oh, that’s the alarm I rigged to
go off when the Mayor puts out
his trash.
Now we go rustle through it.
No thanks, I’m good.
Can we get started with Buzz
please?
Whoa there, you’ve got to
learn to fish before you can eat
tuna sandwiches, kid.
Now then, we have a date with
the Mayor’s dinner scraps!
Rock, honey, that pacing has
got to stop.
It’s making my yin want to
strangle your yang.
Well my yang has never felt
more empty.
There’s no one out there
snapping pictures of me,
Crystal.
That’s what you’ve always
wanted.
Are you nuts?
What would life be like if
strangers didn’t pay any
attention to me?
(Shuddering)
That’s a future too horrible to
contemplate.
I’m off to my revitalizing
sleep chamber, sweetie.
Try not to let this get the
better of you.
Oh, sure.
Leave me all alone in my
greatest moment of need.
Sweetie, you’re not alone.
You still have people watching
you 24/7.
Hey, you’re right.
I bet those security dudes are
just itching for some quality
entertainment.
Welcome to Zilla Security
Camera Theatre.
For tonight’s presentation we
have a timeless classic--
(Grunting)
Huh?
Hey!
Hey!
(Growling)
(Grunting)
Uh, hello, anyone there?
Anyone?
Oh, Scoop’s late.
If he bails on me I’ll--
SCOOP: Patience my young
apprentice.
(Screaming)
(Sighing)
(Screaming)
(Grunting)
Pretty cool.
Except for the part where you
nearly broke your neck.
The first lesson about being
a paparazzi is that you must
become the dirty laundry that
you seek.
Dirty laundry, got it.
Good.
Now, we must condition our
bodies to meet the tremendous
pressures of...hm, let’s say...
hiding in a garbage can.
One must utilize all manner of
entrances.
If you want to get past good
don’t let anything stand in your
way.
(Creaking)
(Crashing)
(Laughing)
Nice dismount.
The judges give it a 5.2.
Man, this paparazzi work
looks really glamorous.
Where do I sign up, dog?
(Tires Squealing)
ROCKZILLA: Woo-hoo!
That’s it, Skunk.
Hey, try to hit that mailbox.
Ooh, Skunk, over there!
Ah-whoo!
Hey, pal, shoot as much as you
want and go ahead and post it on
the internet.
Oh, now even pigeons are cooler
than I am.
(Grunting)
Crikey, mate, are you all
right?
Did anyone catch that?
Uh, sorry, governor.
Oh, well take me home then.
Or maybe the hospital.
Yeah, the hospital.
(Chewing)
SCOOP: One must master the
art of being invisible.
You’ve got to make sure no one
ever catches you tailing them.
Got it.
Hey, Scoop, I need to know.
Why are you always after my dad?
I mean, what’s so special about
Rockzilla?
SCOOP: It was my first gig, I
was a reporter for the Tumble
Rock.
My assignment?
Get an interview with
Rockzilla.
(Engine revving)
Hey, a reporter.
You must be the enemy.
Huh?
Me?
Oh, no no no, I-I-I-I--
Don’t worry, kid.
You and I are going to be best
friends.
You’ll be invited to all my
parties.
You’ll meet everyone.
SCOOP: Parties?
You’ll see everything, hear
everything, taste everything,
feel ever--
(Screaming)
Did you just eat one of my
pre-show mint yummies?
Aw, the cycle is broken.
The ritual is ruined.
(Sobbing)
I’m here for you, Rock.
I’m here for you.
(Sobbing)
Rock refused to go on and I
was barred for life from his
concerts.
After that no one would hire me.
Wow.
Only the rag I work for now,
The National Finger Pointer,
would give me a chance.
(Screaming)
I hear the salmon is good.
(Groaning)
Man, a concussion sure puts
it all into perspective.
No more wild stunts for
publicity.
(Gasping)
Stop, I’ve got some cool card
tricks.
Wait, I brought my harmonica.
Cool, this is double o
seventeen, over.
Yeah, I know.
You’ve got a license to be a
dork.
I don’t know, Willy, this feels
kind of sleazy.
Hey, all we’re doing is
uncovering secrets that Buzz
shouldn’t have in the first
place.
Here’s the plan.
No sign of Buzz, team leader,
over.
WILLY: 10-4, report only
positive ID.
Any luck on your end, Agent Q?
All clear, this covert
lemonade stand is the perfect
cover, but maybe drinking five
glasses wasn’t such a great
idea, yo.
The spies in place?
Just like you said.
One must have many eyes.
To catch one butthead.
(Laughing)
You’re learning kid.
QUINCY: Come in, Willy.
We’ve got Buzz activity, over.
10-4 he’s headed for the
park.
WILLY: There he is.
What now?
Now, we wait for the perfect
shot.
(Girl humming)
Oh, that’s got to hurt.
BUZZ: What’d you do that for?
More than you know, kid.
SCOOP: Buzz, blindsided by
pint sized Petunia.
WILLY: Come on, Scoop.
We could find something better
than this.
Willy, you couldn’t get any
better unless Buzz was wearing
the same dress as that girl.
Trust me.
But it’s not right.
What if this kind of thing has
happened to Buzz his whole life?
(Grunting)
Willy, this happens all the
time.
Why, just yesterday I made it
look like a famous rock star was
strangling a squirrel.
I won’t do it.
I wanted payback but not like
this.
The deal’s off.
(Gasping)
No way!
I got you your dirt and now you
get me my tape!
Okay, okay, Scoop.
A deal’s a deal.
Here’s your tape.
(Kissing)
I’m sorry I ever wanted to be
like you.
Tell Rockzilla he can look
forward to a life of endless
humiliation.
Humiliate my own Dad?
As if.
WOMAN: There’s a dangerous
seven foot green haired lunatic
lurking around the
neighbourhood causing a
disturbance.
And a cat up a tree on Front
street.
Cat up a tree?
Let’s roll!
(Tires squealing)
Hey!
Okay, dog, we can either
wallpaper the school with a
million photocopies or take the
personal approach and slide one
copy into every locker.
Q, I don’t think I can do
this.
I know, there must be a
thousand lockers in this school.
No, Q, I mean I can’t use the
picture to burn Buzz.
It-it’s just not right no matter
how much he deserves it.
I hear you.
(Sighing)
Yo, let me take it off your
hands.
Thanks, Quincy.
What are you going to do,
destroy it?
Something like that.
Stop the presses!
W-what presses?
I’ve always wanted to say
that.
Oh man, Buzz is going to
flatten me.
Chill, Will.
He’s going to be too busy hiding
his face to rearrange yours.
That’s true, Willy.
Even the chess club is laughing
at him.
I mean, ouch.
The chess club?
I still don’t feel right
about this.
I’ve got to square up with Buzz.
Maybe he’ll let me off the hook
with just a quick noogie.
(Laughing)
Hey, Buzz, what’s up, big guy?
(Growling)
Look, I’m sorry about the
picture, okay?
I know what really happened out
there and--
(Grunting)
Hee hee, you got me good
there, Zilla.
I didn’t know you had it in you.
What?
That’s it?
Not by a long shot.
I see now that I have been going
too easy on you and I need some
time to plan our next encounter.
Oh, by the way, you should’ve
printed a picture of me trying
to help that little girl.
That would’ve really ruined me.
Hey Dad.
(Screaming)
Oh, hey Willy.
I thought you were a prowler, or
you know anyone who might want
to hear a couple of tunes.
Sorry.
Hey, Dad, do you remember that
interview you did with Barbara
Winters?
Sure, I can’t believe they
refused to air it.
I thought it really showed my
sensitive side!
Yeah, well, I’ve got a
surprise.
Tonight, exclusive footage of
a rare Rockzilla interview.
Showing the famous legend like
you’ve never seen him before.
I hope you’ve got your
tissues ready, Rock.
(Laughing)
Our online poll is showing
that the fans are loving the
new soft side of Zilla.
What?
(Honking)
(Grunting)
Wait a sec, that kid must’ve
known this would happen!
So, the student out scooped the
master.
I’ve allowed Rock a moment of
peace.
From now on I’m sticking to that
guy like glue.
Wherever he goes I’ll be there
first.
(Tires squealing)
I couldn’t get anyone to even
look at that tape.
Willy, my boy, how’d you do it?
Easy, I let Scoop think it
was damaging to your career.
Hah, Willy, if you ever want
a job as my publicist.
Heh, no thanks, Dad.
I’m washing my hands of anything
that has to do with the press.
I don’t blame you.
Scoop brings out the worst in
all of us.
If I never see him again it’ll
be too soon.
Oh, please, please, please,
please be there.
I knew I could count on him!
(Alarm Sounding)
(Screaming)
(Barking)
(Laughing)
♪